#BUT YEAH. I read that dialogue somewhere on Tumblr and I was like “DAMN.” and it hasn't left my head since

[outer-andromeda]

Tenna taking care of little Kris is something I need more of please and thank you.

Also. Anyone else went crazy over that dialogue in the boss fight where Tenna's like "I'm the one who taught you how to laugh and cry" to Kris ? Something along these lines? Yeah. So uh. Think he noticed Kris isn't themself ?

[tojiscrack]

Guess who found your fic on ao3 at 11pm, not noticing the 108k words on the bottom and got so hooked even by the half quarter of the first chapter that resulted in her staying awake until 10 am, reading all 108k words in one sitting. Yes me. Me, who got so hooked she read it all in one sitting. Me, who’s now so emotionally attached to this fic that she’s anxious about your comments under the chapters, stating that THE MAIN PLOT hasn’t even STARTED YET. Me, who knows DAMN WELL the little caterpillars and butterflies and the moths story Megumi and y/n read out is for sure foreshadowing. Me, who’s noticed several butterfly symbolism used over the course of the story. Me, who screamed into her pillow when it was stated that y/n’a dress resembled a butterfly. Me, who’s seen your comment replying to someone, stating that there MIGHT be some kind of drifting apart. Me, who’s well ware of the Heavy Angst tag on the fic. Me, who knows that an author who’s this good at delivering humor and fluff is gonna DESTROY me when the angst is gonna be written. Me, who half regrets now that she’s discovered the story because she’s scared of all that’s about to come.

You seriously have a way with words, dialogue, symbolism, humor, the bond between every character. It’s not so simple to put more than 5 characters in a setting and deal with them all while trying to make it as natural as possible but you SOMEHOW do it SO WELL. I’m just. God. All the thoughts I have on this fic would maybe even rival the 108k words you’ve written up until now but I don’t have the capacity to put them into words as well as you do.

just know that this fic impacted me so much, so badly, years from now on after it's finished, I'll still think about it and re-read it.

so excited (and scared as hell ngl) to see where you'll be going with this story. I may havw joined late but I am sticking around till the end.

love you, great work <3

liar, liar masterlist here:

yayyy, another ao3 reader 😫 welcome to the tumblr crew, i’m so glad you’re hereeee ❤️‍🩹

i had to go back and check whether it really is 108k words and i found myself shocked bc damn, i really wrote that much? 😭 if i put half the effort i put into this story into my essays instead, maybe i’d be a better student but we live and we learn ig 😬

“emotionally attached” to the fic is mind blowing to me 🥹 i didn’t know it’d have this big of an impact on someone but i can’t say i’m displeased. that’s one of the nicest things i’ve heard on here (among other things ofc). ugh, you’re so nice for sending a message on that 🩷

and yes, you are absolutely right. the main plot does not start until next chapter (or more accurately — in terms of drama — somewhere down the line AFTER that) 👀 idk which comment i said that on but i trust ur judgement ‘cause i remember mentioning that somewhere 😭 DON’T BE SCARED, IT’LL BE FUN (and thrilling and scary) BUT STILL 😊

the butterfly thing you mentioned is interesting, actually 🫢 maybe i just really like butterflies (even tho they scare the ever living shit out of me and i nearly killed a few in the london zoo YEARS ago as a child cuz i was fidgeting since they just let them roam free in that greenhouse thingy and i was scared for my life and dying of heat with the humidity?).

YOU MUST HAVE BEEN STALKING MY PAGE BC I DO REMEMBER SAYING SMTH ALONF THOSE LINES I JUST CAN’T REMEMBER WHERE 😭 but i invite you to continue doing so bc i like watching my lovely little liars squirm and then send in their predictions and fear 😋 and this long, juicy message has me giggling to myself and REELING 🤭

yeah, but we’re not holding back on the heavy angst tag… er… buckle up? it’s gonna go downhill from here on out 😟

“you seriously have a way with words” — stop.

“it’s not so simple to put more than 5 characters in a setting and deal with them all while trying to make it as natural as possible but you somehow do it so well” — DOUBLE, TRIPLE, QUADRUPLE, INFINITY STOP OR I’LL CRY 🥹 no one has ever said that about my writing, and in fact, i hadn’t even noticed that myself 😭 i think i’m gonna levitate in glee ✨ to know it flows well enough for it to be commented on (out of ur own free will and not me pressing a gun to ur forehead), it’s just UGHHH so nice and sweet and i’m so glad you’ve joined the liar, liar community 😫 warmest welcome ml <3

gosh you’ve put this story on such a high pedestal, i’m almost scared i won’t be able to meet ur standards, even with everything planned beforehand 😟 but i’m willing to try. if you’re here for the super long ride (my updates are sporadic and will continue to be a such as the time goes on).

it was definitely not a LATE arrival per se — the liar, liar family is still pretty small. i’ve only got about 321 followers, so definitely not as much as the bigger jjk writers on here, and half of those are split between my megumi fic readers and levi fic readers. i now consider you an og just bc this analysis was so in depth and interesting, i found myself smiling so hard my cheeks hurt 🙂‍↔️

but i love you SO much for this. i’d love to see more comments and messages from you. don’t be afraid to spam me if you must (in fact, i encourage it!!!) 😁 i get so giddy and excited and motivated when ppl send me their predictions. it’s one of the greatest things about writing (and the best part imo).

have a lovely day! and i can’t wait for you to see the next chapter and what i have in store for you <3

[canardroublard]

Fic writer interview

Thank you @takingoffmyshoes for tagging me in the thing!

How many works do you have on AO3?

51 (putting additional text in this line because if I don't tumblr makes the font truly enormous)

What's your total AO3 word count?

283,783

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

don't make me spell it out (TMFU. Aka The Pegging Fic)

poco a poco (Rogue One. Aka The Music Student AU)

a million different reasons (TMFU. Aka the one where Napoleon's self-loathing and Gaby's inability to identify or ask for what she wants delay a threesome for an inordinate amount of time)

breathe (Gotham TV. Aka that one Gotham fic I ever wrote)

least the rose alive must three (TMFU. Aka the soulmate AU)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try. If I'm going through a tough moment they often get unanswered, but I generally answer otherwise. Unless it's someone asking me to write more.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Based on the number of times the word "bittersweet" is used in the comments section and the crying emojis, likely don't talk just hold me closer (Star Trek: Discovery). Its sister fic nor made me feel so sweet is also a bit of a downer™

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I don't tend towards *unhappy *endings in my substantial works, but Dirty Talk (TMFU) is unrepentantly sappy so that I suppose

Do you write crossovers?

I don't believe I ever have

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I'm not sure I'd call it outright "hate", but have received multiple comments on a million different reasons upset at me because I guess Napoleon being an unreliable narrator is not obvious enough for everyone.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Every now and then. And, statistically, the threesome/moresome kind.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Even if I had I have no clue how I'd know.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so. I have translated a few of my own and others' fics as French practice.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nay.

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Hmm I'm not sure I have an OTP to Rule Them All. The TMFU ot3 seems an obvious answer. That said, I am a chronic multi-shipper within fandoms so I rarely even have an OTP within a fandom. This may not be obvious in my writing but it is my reading habit if nothing else.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Before anyone says "so give me a line and take me home", it's getting finished. Just not quickly. Stop telling people I'm it's dead

In terms of genuine "yeah I'm probably not gonna finish that", birthright, my Rogue One Pacific Rim fusion.

What are your writing strengths?

I would say writing nuanced/ambiguous/fucked up little guy characters? None of my favourites are free from sin, if you feel me, and I like to explore those sins.

Also @takingoffmyshoes tells me they want to write Gaby/Napoleon the way I write Gaby/Napoleon so that, apparently :D

What are your writing weaknesses?

Structuring conflict and resolution. I often find myself resolving conflicts too quickly/easily in longer fics.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Entirely dependent on the context. I've done it multiple times, in multiple languages, some instances more successfully (imho) than others. For me, the most seamless way to integrate it and have the audience understand is via framing things in the POV character's thoughts (assuming they understand what's being said).

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who. Somewhere in the presumably purged depths of LJ there was an 11/Rose fic I wrote.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

Too damn many. If I had to pic one, Widows (2018), a film which left me clinically feral in the best way, has a woeful lack of fic (or people who've watched it in general. Go watch Widows. It rocks. It will fuck you up and devastate you emotionally. It's got muscly Viola Davis in a tank top. Range.)

ETA oh and Lower Decks. Because the world will be forced to endure the result of my "Mariner and Ransom have been fucking since season one and neither of them acknowledges it and both of them kinda loathe themselves for it but the sex is so goddamn hot that it keeps happening" conspiracy theory slant on watching the show.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

I'm going to completely sideline the bigger/more popular fics of mine (such that my limited popularity is). They're fine. I like them. "so give me a line" makes me want to eat plaster (Affectionate) every time I return to it. Choosing trompe-l'oreille (Atomic Blonde) because it fucks severely. By which I mean it is both emotionally and literally haunting. That is a form of fucking, right?

Tagging:

@bioticsandheadshots

[vacantgodling]

The Fool, The Magicuan, The Emperor, The Lovers, Justice, and The Sun !!

(Might send another ask later. It was a long list and I'm currently at a lecture lmao)

HENRIKEEEE firstly thank u secondly LMAO felt i usually do most of my tumblring whilst at work 💀

00. THE FOOL: BEGINNINGS (What is the opening line to your current work?) 

hilarious cuz i haven’t written the first chapter of paramour yet. however i am counting cage as a current novel/project (it’s gonna have 20 chapters so 💀 fanfiction be damned that’s a fucking book LMAO) so here’s the first line from that (and shameless plug u can read it here!

Sometime closer to dusk when the number of airplanes he could make out crossing the horizon was fewer and fewer, and the lights of Gibraltar’s closest neighboring city La Linea began to kiss the night with her bright lights, Lena came to find him.

01. THE MAGICIAN: SPARK OF MAGIC (What inspired you to write your novel?) 

going back to paramour tho honestly the biggest jumping off point where it slowly began to take shape was crimson peak. i remember really distinctly wanting to want a story of that vibe, with ghosts and mystery but then it eventually evolved into the form it’s in now by drawing from other inspiration sources. like it’s very much Not like how i initially thought it would be LMAO but i love this version more 💛

i’m just gonna put my influences slide from my powerpoint to fully illustrate but yeah like A Lot went into getting this wip started.

a lot of it also hinges on the development of both hya as a character (being the first Real Asshole i’ve allowed myself to write as a protagonist) and his relationship with amon—also my desire to write a romance on My Terms just for me that I Liked. ive always felt like i had to write what other people wanted to see or what was good and wholesome but like. i can write whatever i want and this story was the first step in doing that.

04. THE EMPEROR: STRUCTURE (How do you plot your novels?) 

this is a bit of a complicated question only because it’s kind of… all over the place. but in general what i usually do is i make a VERY detailed outline of all the events i want to happen in the book. chapter by chapter the whole nine. like down to adding bits of dialogue, plugging in any exploratory pieces i wrote before hand for context or to add structure

(and what i mean by exploratory is like basically i don’t tend to plot immediately, i write small blurbs to understand the vibes and feels. a old piece on this blog somewhere (perhaps) is when i wrote about hya asking amon to come to the masquerade reception with him in an extremely roundabout way, but that was written WAAAAY back when i was first trying to understand their dynamic; hell amon didn’t even have a name! and now that scene has a proper slot in the outline in chapter 9 lmao).

but i literally do this so i can KNOW what the hell im doing. i’m not a pants-person by any means literally or figuratively, so i need to be able to see the vision.

once i have an outline fully written out i can either write from the beginning down (like i’m doing with cage rn) or i can do what i’m doing with paramour and write based on interest level. writing based on interest level is probably going to be how i write my original novels just because whenever i’ve tried to write straight down (like i have with donut wip) i tend to get mad stuck. and i think it’s because especially in first drafts of my original novels i tend to have certain scenes… fuzzier than others. i need the context of the other scenes around them to build them up. or those are worldbuilding holes etc etc. either way my og novels i tend to get stuck in cuz there’s more thinking involved lmao.

06. THE LOVERS: RELATIONSHIPS (What are your favorite relationships to write about, whether romantic, familial, or platonic?) 

romantic >>>>>>> familial/platonic.

i’m just a romantic at heart generally speaking.

but on a deep level i have a weird personal struggle (it’s the ‘ism) with family and friends so like… i just find them more difficult to write because i don’t really experience them “easily” in my own life? — or at the bare minimum they just spark less joy to me than romance to me. i want to get better at writing other kinds of relationships but i also think writing them just makes me feel lonely lmao.

11. JUSTICE: TRUTH (What is the 'truth' of your novel i.e the prevalent themes or overarching motifs?) 

🤔 i think the most prevalent theme of paramour is truth itself tbh. finding truth yes, and the power of truth in itself sure, but also cultivating the truth within yourself—you’ll only be happy when you live truthfully to your desires yknow?

19. THE SUN: POSITIVITY (What is your greatest writing strength or skill?)

pretty prose in itself. i think i’m really good at creating saccharine, deep descriptions of emotions and those kinds of sentences long winding and emotional really tickle my brain personally so i put the most OOMPH into them.

[ahogehope]

BlazBlue Alternative Dark War Nightmare Fiction Event English Translation (Part 8: At the Edge)

IT’S FINALLY OVER! -cue game over music-

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST:  I realize this isn’t getting as much (actually not much of any) traffic as opposed to the reddit posts, but I’d like to extend this request over here as well. I’d definitely like to continue working on translations for this game but am unsure whether I should jump right into the most current event (the Dark Mai one) or start on actual story content next. So my question is: what do you guys want to see more? Reply to this post or shoot me an ask or whatever it is tumblr does these days.

Crossposted from reddit just for a little more exposure.

This is part 8, or the ninth story quest in the event.

Previous parts can be found here: [Part 1-1, Part 1-2, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7]

Some notes:

- The default name of Rei is used for the player character and was selected as male at the beginning of the game.

- I’m still on the fence on if I should be using honorifics or not. Your opinion on the matter would be greatly appreciated.

Click here to be taken to a pastebin with the translated dialogue or look under the read more to read it here. 

Section 8 – “At the Edge” (TL: Read as “kazuaru hazama-nite”)

Kazuma This is...

Ciel It’s very similar to the room we found hidden beneath Ishana.

Raabe So... this is the “innermost part.”

Hazama Oh? What’s with you guys all of a sudden? You’ve all got this shocked look on your faces. Have you guys been here before?

>We’ve been somewhere like this before. Hazama Really? Normally I’d ask to hear more about what sort of place that was but... Hazama We’re not exactly in the best place to be taking our time, wouldn’t you agree?

>Never seen it before in my life. Hazama Hey now, don’t just leave me in the dark like that. Hazama You’ll just make me even more curious if you keep it a secret, y’know. Hazama But... now isn’t really the best time to get into that, is it?

Fuzzy Raabe’s right though. This is the innermost part you guys have been so keen on getting to.

Fuzzy You brought those six keys here so you could activate the elements... and finally escape.

Raabe What happens next then?

Fuzzy You’ll just have to find out for yourself, right? You will, won’t you? Really though, even I don’t have any idea what’s supposed to happen next. Ahahaha.

Raabe We don’t have much of a choice either way, it would seem.

Kazuma As soon as we activate the elements, all of the mana we’ve collected will activate with them and accumulate around us.

Kazuma Much more mana than we’re used to will gather together in one place.

Hazama Will that be problematic for us?

Kazuma There’s no reason why it should be. This is probably the perfect place for it actually...

Fuzzy If you’re gonna go ahead and start it up, I’d let Kazuma do it. Since he’s a magician he should be used to working with mana and the elements already.

Ciel Kazuma-san, would you be willing to activate the elements for us?

Kazuma I, uh, yeah, I can do that. That shouldn’t be too difficult.

Kazuma Let’s see here...

Hazama You’ve looked like you’ve had something on your mind for a while now.

Hazama I agree that Kazuma-san’s the best suited out of all of us to carry this out but... don’t push yourself if you don’t think you can handle it.

Hazama If we really have to we can always looks for another way to activate them...

Kazuma ......

Kazuma ...No.

Kazuma I can do it.

Raabe Hey, hold on...

Hazama Are you sure?

Kazuma Yes. Please, allow me.

[a green magic circle appears, surrounded by the six elements]

Hazama Oh my... I can already feel how the air around us has changed. Looks like you managed to pull it off without a hitch after all.

Ciel Is this... activated mana? But this feeling, where have I...

Raabe It can't be. This is...! Hey, Kazuma! Stop whatever it is that you’re doing!

Kazuma ......

Raabe Are you even listening!? Earth to Kazuma!!

Kazuma ...Ah... it’s just like I thought. I was wondering... if that’s what it was...

>What’s wrong, Kazuma-san? >Who are you talking to?

Kazuma Who...

[a dark green shadow with veins and one glowing eye starts to materialize]

Hazama Uuh, guh, ghh....

Ciel Hazama-san? Is something wrong?

Hazama Please be careful... Something’s... coming...!

[the shadow becomes fully visible]

Raabe Wh... What’s going on?

Fuzzy Hmm, I wonder what it could be～? What do you think?

Fuzzy What about you, Rei? What do your “eyes” see? You can see it, can’t you?

Raabe Don’t look. ...I guess that’s impossible, huh. Try not to focus as much as you can. This... isn’t a collection of mana.

Ciel Raabe-san, Rei-san! We’ve got a problem.

Ciel I’ve confirmed the appearance of the cauldron.

Ciel But... there’s nothing around here that looks like it could be the cauldron. And if there’s a cauldron here, then who is the Observer...?

Raabe They’re both right in front of us.

Ciel Eh? Wh-What do you mean?

Raabe The cauldron came into existence across this entire world the moment this guy appeared. In other words, that shadow... it’s the Observer.

Raabe It’s also the cauldron. There’s no other explanation for this sort of reaction. This much condensed seithr... this is the cauldron.

Hazama What’s that now? Seithr?

Hazama You mean what Kazuma-san’s magic is activating right now isn’t...

Raabe It’s not the elements or mana, no. It’s seithr!

??? Ahh～ god, you losers took fore～ver to show up.

Ciel !?

??? Shit though, you guys sure have been through a lot, huh? But thanks to you I can talk as much as I want again.

>The shadow spoke! ??? Kyahahahaha, just a shadow, eh... Well, I guess that’ll have to do for now.

>Who are you? ??? What, you wanna know my name? You really wanna know who I am? Sure, I’ll humor you...

Kazuma ...Yuuki Terumi...

Spirit Terumi Oops, looks like you beat me to it. But yeah, the kid’s right. Don’t go forgetting it, numbskulls.

Spirit Terumi Yuuki Terumi. That’s the name, folks.

Hazama You were lurking inside of me.

Hazama Earlier when we were fighting Saya-san, she said she had sensed something within me... I wasn’t entirely sure what she meant at the time.

Hazama I had no idea that it would turn out to be something like this.

Spirit Terumi Hyahahahaha! Damn, I didn’t realize you were so out of the loop, Hazama-chan.

Ciel So you’re familiar with Hazama-san as well.

Spirit Terumi Oh yeah, best of buddies, thickest of thieves, call it what you like but we’re rea～l intimate. In fact, I know all you guys.

Spirit Terumi You’re the morons who’ve been running all over the city doing my dirty work for me. Hyahahahahahaha!

Kazuma So you were... using us? Does that mean that Fuzzy-san was also...?

Fuzzy Can’t say I know about any of this. I’m only here to fulfill my role. Really I’m just a pawn here.

Fuzzy You guys are all just pawns too. But even the pawns are necessary in the end, right? It’s not really a game if all the pieces aren’t in order, after all.

Spirit Terumi The trap over here gets it. And now since you’ve been such good little slaves so far, how’s about you do me one last teensy-weensy favor...

Spirit Terumi And die for me, will you? Hyahahahahaha!

Raabe I see now. We’ve been playing right into his hands this entire time.

Raabe When Kazuma started the activation sequence, he wasn’t channeling the mana or the elements. He wound up summoning this guy instead.

Ciel No way... Then does that mean the whole story about escaping from the city was a lie?

Spirit Terumi Come on, even if I’m not that cruel. I’ll still let you guys out.

Spirit Terumi All aboard the Terumi express! Now serving a one-way trip straight into the Boundary! Just make sure to keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle, or you might lose them!

Hazama Are you always this egotistical?

Hazama Things may have gone your way up until now, but we’re not going to just stand here and let you do whatever you want.

Hazama ...It was wrong of me to bring you all this way when I sensed something was amiss, no matter how small it may have been.

Hazama Looks like I got you all mixed up in something undesirable after all... I’m really sorry, Rei-san.

Hazama But I don’t think I’ll be able to handle this one by myself. I’m afraid I must ask for your assistance one last time.

>Let’s all get out of here together. Hazama Thank you. I’m... truly glad to have met you.

>Let’s kick his ass and get the hell out of here! Spirit Terumi Ooh, someone’s a little touchy. That sort of enthusiasm is contagious, y’know.

Ciel Assuming combat position. All eyes on target. Ready when you are!

Raabe His form is still unstable. It’s hard to say if his existence has fully taken root yet or not.

Raabe The reaction he’s giving off is definitely strong but... he might not be able to use the full extent of his power the way he is now.

Raabe We need to strike before all of the seithr has finished gathering in one place. Let’s get this over with quickly.

Fuzzy Go, go! You can do it!

Hazama Are you ready for this, Kazuma-san?

Kazuma Ah, uh... Right.

Spirit Terumi Oh? You wouldn’t really team up against little ol’ me, would you? Heheheheh.

Hazama Well then. Let’s go, Terumi-san.

Spirit Terumi Guh, shit...! My power... no, none of this shit. None of it’s good enough!

Kazuma ......

Fuzzy Whoa. You guys really creamed him.

Hazama ...I think that shadow inside of me... Terumi-san detached himself completely from me during the course of that fight.

Hazama It’s the strangest feeling. It’s unsettling but also like a... weight’s been lifted, in a sense.

Spirit Terumi Ha, haha... Hyahahaha...! Damn, that really could’ve gone better.

Spirit Terumi I guess you win this one. I really lost to some lame spin-off side characters. Ain’t that right?

Kazuma Yes. I... think that’s what happened.

Spirit Terumi Heh, hahahaah! Yeah, them’s the breaks, huh. Tch, what a pain in the ass.

Spirit Terumi Man, this sucks... you’re really blue-balling me here. Taking on a bunch of pussies like you should’ve been a joke.

Spirit Terumi Sure screwed myself on that one.

Kazuma ...Please send us back.

Kazuma As long as you do that... I don’t think we’ll have to hurt you anymore.

Spirit Terumi Ha! Hurt me? You really think you can hurt me? Hyahaha, you don’t have a lot going on underneath that pretty face, do you, kid?

Spirit Terumi Don’t make me laugh.

Ciel Are you going to continue resisting?

Spirit Terumi Oooh, close but no cigar! This isn’t what you’d call resistance...

Spirit Terumi This is an escape!

[static]

Kazuma ...Ah. H-Huh?

Ciel This is...

>It’s Ishana! Kazuma Yes, this is Ishana. It’s the same place we were before we found ourselves in that strange city...

>Are we back? Ciel ...It would appear so. This is where we were standing before we were taken to that strange city.

Ciel But what does this mean? It’s safe to say that we took out the Observer but we weren’t able to destroy the Cauldron...

Ciel Regardless... we managed to escape the Phantom Field.

Raabe I still need to look into everything further so this is just a hypothesis for now, but...

Raabe I don’t think that city was an undiscovered Phantom Field.

Raabe It’s foundation was built on Ishana who had already lost its Observer.

Raabe Using the power of Observation, that shadow calling itself Terumi must have found its way in and overwrote things when it took over.

Kazuma So it was... re-Observed?

Raabe That’s exactly what it was.

Raabe In other words, we weren’t so much moved somewhere else as it was our surroundings themselves were changing before our eyes... That’s probably what happened.

Hazama Well, it was certainly an experience I could have lived without and I’m still not overly sure how any of it was possible but...

Hazama Everything worked out in the end, right?

Hazama We all made it out safe and sound. Let’s be thankful for that, shall we?

Hazama Ahh～, truly all’s well that ends well.

Ciel Hazama-san. And Fuzzy-san, too. The two of you came back to Ishana as well I see.

Fuzzy Bzzt, wrong answer. Really, did you hear a thing Raabe just said? None of us actually came back anywhere.

Fuzzy We were all just sort of displaced.

Ciel Ah, so we were. So then would Fuzzy-san and Hazama-san be considered foreign entities in this situation?

Raabe There’s no way to know for sure what the Phantom Field has classified them as but... that’s probably the case.

Raabe Neither of them are involved with Ishana.

Hazama Hmm～, while this place does look incredibly delightful, I’m afraid this isn’t where I belong.

Fuzzy Me either. I’m not getting any good vibes from the ambience around here. I don’t think I’d fit in very well.

Raabe ...Once a Phantom Field has been liberated of its Observer, any foreign materials left behind should gradually start to return to where they were originally from.

Raabe Here soon your existential information should be sent back to your own worlds.

Fuzzy I guess we’re stuck hanging around here until that happens, huh～.

Fuzzy Well, not like it matters. I’ve never been here before so there’s no harm in exploring a bit. Don’t you think?

[Fuzzy leaves]

Hazama And there he goes. I suppose it’s best to just let him have his fun while he can.

Hazama But more importantly... Rei-san, Ciel-san, Kazuma-san, Raabe-san.

Hazama Thank you all so much for your help.

Hazama When I was still wandering around all by myself, I was at a loss as to what I was supposed to do...

Hazama But as soon as I joined up with you guys, everything just sort of naturally clicked into place.

Hazama A lot happened back there, but I want you to know that from the bottom of my heart I’m grateful we were able to escape from that bizarre city.

Raabe ...Is that all you have to say? I can’t say I’m very convinced.

Raabe It still feels like you’ve been manipulating us this entire time.

Hazama Don’t be ridiculous! It must’ve been fate that I ran into you when I did. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.

Hazama I’d even go so far as to say that you saved me.

Hazama I’m honestly in your debt. If you ever need an extra hand for something, I’ll be sure to do everything in my power to help you out.

Hazama Then again... I can’t guarantee that the me you’ll encounter then will be the same as I am now.

Hazama Let’s do this the right way this time. My name is Hazama. It’s a pleasure to meet you.

Hazama Rei-san.

>Pleased to meet you.

Hazama Yes. I wish you all the best.

Ciel ......

Raabe ...We still need to head back and check the data to see if this was indeed the abnormality the System was detecting.

Raabe We’ve overstayed our welcome. Let’s return to base.

Kazuma ...I guess this is goodbye then.

Kazuma Hadn’t you said earlier that you couldn’t stay for long?

Ciel That’s correct. We’re still only outsiders in this world.

Kazuma ......

Kazuma ...I’m really glad I was able to see you again. Getting to spend more time together... it was really fun.

Kazuma I feel like I know myself a little better now.

Kazuma Thank you so much.

Ciel There’s no need to thank us. We were merely here for our mission.

Kazuma You’re as blunt as always, Ciel-san...

Kazuma ...I think I have my own perplexing “mission” in front of me... nevermind. Hang in there for me, will you?

Kazuma I’m rooting for you.

>Thank you. >Good luck, Kazuma-san.

[static]

Kagami Rei! Ciel! Thank god you guys made it back in one piece～!

Ciel Oh. You startled me. What’s the matter, Kagami-san? You seem out of sorts.

Kagami Well, what did you expect!? Almost as soon as you two got in you just fell off the grid!

Kagami I wasn’t able to pinpoint where either of were for a long time...

Kagami Your signals only reappeared inside Ishana’s Phantom Field a little while ago, y’know!

Kagami So what happened? Nevermind, it’ll be faster to get the answers from Raabe’s internal data.

Kagami Either way, I’ll get an investigation started. First you guys need to go get a medical check.

Kagami And watch yourselves this time, got it!?

Ciel Y-Yes, ma’am.

Kagami I  can’t let you out of my sight for even a second. Geez...

[Kagami leaves]

Ciel It would seem we’ve caused quite the stir in our absence.

Ciel Let’s head to the medical room. I’ll go with you, Rei-san.

Hazama So this is supposed to be the famous Ishana, huh? Now that I’ve finally gotten a good look at it, it truly is nothing more than a ghost town.

Hazama ...Well then. I wonder where I should be heading next? With the help of those suckers, I was able to remove the chain that was inside me.

Hazama I should be able to go just about anywhere now.

Hazama At any rate, Terumi-san is right back where he should be. Although I can’t say I’m overly thrilled that he left me to do all the grunt work by myself.

Hazama ...I would have been in quite the bind if it weren’t for that boy, though. Heheh.

Hazama But still, what a successful endeavor that turned out to be!

Hazama For me, for Terumi-san... Even for him.

Hazama “End Gazer”... The One Who Sees the End. I can’t wait to see how this will play out.

Kazuma ......

Kazuma Ishana... All these years here, and I still haven’t learned a thing.

Kazuma But... I feel like I finally know why I’m here... Just a little...

Kazuma I feel like I’m home.

https://imgur.com/a/VfNvhRF

[runadamsrun]

I Want to Eat Your Pancreas

Hmm.

So I’ll be writing all of this out, my thoughts and feelings. And talking about the anime too, and how it ties in with those thoughts/feelings, but it’s more so I can get my thoughts out somewhere and process them. I don’t really intend for this to be an anime review or anything. 

I actually just watched the series for the first time this week. Specifically... just this Wednesday (11/17). So at my school (well, technically the school district), we have a Thanksgiving break, where we basically get the whole week of Thanksgiving off. And so I plan on actually playing a movie before every break. The original plan was to watch Josee, the Tiger and the Fish for Thanksgiving break, Your Name for winter break, I Want to Eat Your Pancreas for spring break, and A Silent Voice for summer break. 

Unfortunately (or fortunately?) enough, I couldn’t find any online dubs for Josee, the Tiger and the Fish, and the subbed ones I could find had these incredibly small and illegible subtitles (not for me, but since I’m projecting the movie for the class to watch, the subs are pretty damn illegible). So I decided to instead watch I Want to Eat Your Pancreas with the class.

Y’know, it got me. It got me pretty damn good, actually. I... didn’t expect the movie to hit me so hard. I knew it was good, but I don’t think I even knew that it was a tragedy going in.

It got me for a lot of reasons. I’ll probably list out the less important reasons first, and then followed by the more important ones. Tbh though, I don’t even have my list of reasons as I’m typing this out right now. I’m coming up with them as I go. (For reference, all of my Tumblr posts are like, stream-of-consciousness.)

For one, the soundtrack. Oh my god. The background music playing when they’re reconciling in the rain (after the “house/room scene”), or when the fireworks are going off, or during the credits. But yeah, the main one that gets me is during the fireworks scene: “Himitsu” by sumika.

And I think the second one would be the title drops. When in the beginning, Sakura told Haruki she wants to eat his pancreas. Of course, this was in the context of how it was believed, in the past, that if you were ill and there was something wrong with one of your organs (e.g., liver, heart), you just had to eat another one to get better. But then the title drops later at the end when they... both “confess” to each other. There’s way more meaning attached, and more on this later, actually.

But I think the main reason why this anime hit me so hard is because of the topics that come up. Like, less-so themes, but moreso things the two talked about or said to each other. They’re just so... beautiful, and romantic, and tragic. They’re the main reasons why I’m bothering with this post, and talking about it, and... how I feel about it. For me, I guess the main draw of anime, any anime, and what makes certain ones rank so highly, are those hard-hitting scenes and dialogue and how well they’re done and align with my own thoughts/feelings. (Same with Your Name which I’ll talk about in the future. But also why SukaSuka and Beatless are both in my top 5.) So let’s talk about some of the major scenes that got me, that launched this movie to, not just my top 5, but top 3.

When the two ate yakiniku together, of course, there was a title drop there (when she said she doesn’t want to be cremated so he can eat her pancreas). But then she talked about how there’s a foreign religion that believes that when you eat someone, their soul lives on in you. And the way I read that, it’s... hm. It’s like she was proposing that he spend eternity with her. Which is incredibly romantic in my eyes.

And then in the rain, after the house/room scene, he said that they only happened across each other by chance in the hospital. She refuted this, saying that it wasn’t just a coincidence. That every decision they’ve made so far in their lives led to them meeting that very moment. She then said that it also wasn’t anything like fate, which initially threw me off. (Because that’d be the far more romantic right?) But she followed up by talking about how she chose to write in a notebook, how he liked books and chose to pick it up, and chose to stick with her for the short remainder of her life, all of which brought them together. In retrospect, this is far better, as it suggests that they had some degree of... I guess agency or control over their lives? And everything they did, everything single action they both did, was gradual steps that helped them meet each other.

Of course, the parts where they talked about wanting to be like the other person too. How the other person is so amazing, and how they could become like them. Haruki did this as he was waiting at Cafe Spring, and Sakura did this in her farewell letter. And they followed up with this by saying that they'd like to take a leaf out of the other's book. But Haruki didn’t say this. Instead, he deleted that text and sent another one expressing the same idea, but more... personal. And now it’s something that only the two of them can understand. Something special shared between them, and only between them, in the whole world. But I’ll quote Sakura. From her farewell letter:

You see, I wanted to tell you before I died. That I'd like to take a leaf out of your book. But I shouldn't be using an expression like that. It would be a shame to describe the relationship we have using normal, everyday words. So I came up with this. I know you might not like the idea, but I've decided: I want to eat your pancreas.

The words themselves, as I mentioned earlier, are a title drop. A major reason I really liked this anime. But just a really good title drop would only make me like the anime. The reason why I love this anime is because it’s moreso this concept of... a unique “idea” that’s shared between the two of them, and only the two of them. Somehow... that hits me. An insider thing that only two people in the world will understand.

But our relationship can't be described through simple terms like love or friendship, right?

Sakura also said this earlier, in her letter, and it kind of builds upon the previous ideas I’ve been touching on. Kind of. But the relationship they share, it’s something different. It’s not friendship, of course. But I’d say it’s more than love as well. It’s something that can’t be described using “normal, everyday words” (previous quote). It’s more of... meeting your... hm. Other half? Would this mean that they’re moreso twin flames as opposed to soulmates? I’m not sure, actually. But this concept... ugh. It’s so romantic. Because they’re meant, and made, for each other. Encouraging the other’s change. And growth.

I think this idea is kind of supported when Haruki talked about how, initially, they were like, “We’re complete opposites of each other!” But upon reflection:

You often said that we're not aligned. Not looking the same way. Well, of course not. We were always looking at each other.

Continuing from that exact quote, actually, and going onto my next idea, he then said:

I'm the one who... I lived my life just to meet you.

To meet you. I've made my choices in life for the sake of nothing else.

Because this is in response to what she said, also from her farewell letter:

I always thought I was just like any other of the hundreds of thousands of high school students out there, albeit one living a slightly shorter life than usual. But you cared for a [sic] uninteresting girl like me. You, who have no need for relationships like friendship or love, chose none other than me!

Perhaps I've spent 17 years waiting to be needed by you. Just like cherry blossoms wait for spring!

She also said this again when Haruki told her his name for the first time, and she realized that they were made for each other. (Name-wise, at the time.)

But this idea... this is the biggest one. The idea of a raison d’être. Why I loved HakoMari. Because it’s just so... beautiful and romantic. Living your life for the sake of someone else.

Life, and everything in life, is so ephemeral. So to spend the short life you have, to use it, for someone else, isn’t that just so... tragic and wonderful?

I think all of the reasons above, of course, are what led to I Want to Eat Your Pancreas smashing through my anime rankings and hitting the top 3. Because...

I think of Kale I guess. And maybe Emily back then even, who... well, you can look at that post. I guess a lot of these thoughts are why I was so... heartbroken then.

But Kale... maybe... everything we’ve both done was to meet each other? And our relationship is beyond both a friendship or any describable relationship? And that we’re only showing our other sides to the other person, and only to the other person? 

I don’t know. That’s why this anime gets me. I don’t know how things will turn out between us. And well... damn it. I really don’t know. And I can’t know, and I’ll have to wait and see.

But wouldn’t it be great? Maybe I’ve lived my whole life waiting for someone. For the future sake of someone. And while I don’t know how my relationship with Kale will turn out, or who I’ll meet in the future, wouldn’t it be so romantic if we both lived our lives just to meet the other person?

[vivithefolle]

Not sure if you already talked about this. (I’m pretty sure you have) but someone seemed to notice that when the trio get into fights, Hermione’s always in the right. Even when she’s supposed to be wrong she always seems to be half right. That kind of bothers me. Especially since it’s evident in the whole Scabbers situation.

I have indeed, on Quora, so let’s move yet another answer of mine to Tumblr!

Hermione is seldom wrong in the Harry Potter books. Sometimes she makes mistakes but those mistakes are either completely swept under the rug or downright ignored.

It’s partly due to lazy writing and partly due to Rowling’s own growing bias in favour of her Author Avatar that was fuelled by Steve Kloves, the primary advocate of the Hermione Granger Is The Perfect Girl Ever line of thinking (an utterly ridiculous line of thinking mind you).

Lizo: Steve, Hermione is a character that you have said is one of your favorites. Has that made her easier to write?

Steve: Yeah, I mean, I like writing all three, but I've always loved writing Hermione. Because, I just, one, she's a tremendous character for a lot of reasons for a writer, which also is she can carry exposition in a wonderful way because you just assume she read it in a book. If I need to tell the audience something...

JKR: Absolutely right, I find that all the time in the book, if you need to tell your readers something just put it in her. There are only two characters that you can put it convincingly into their dialogue. One is Hermione, the other is Dumbledore. In both cases you accept, it's plausible that they have, well Dumbledore knows pretty much everything anyway, but that Hermione has read it somewhere. So, she's handy.

Now this, right here, is the exact core of the problem.

Rowling herself admits it: if she wants the readers to have information, she puts Hermione in the scene. Hermione is our primary means of exposition because, like *grits teeth* Sssssteve puts it, it’s easy to assume that she’s read about it somewhere and it makes sense.

That’s all well and good but at first, if you notice, Ron also gave us exposition about the wizarding world, mostly about its culture. He was able to recall the exact year of the Wizarding Confederation that outlawed dragon breeding in Philosopher’s Stone! He explained what were respectively a “Mudblood”, a “Squib”, and Parseltongue, Hermione doing a little exposition about the history of that last one! He was also able to identify Sirius, after being dragged into the Whomping Willow, as an Animagi!

But then Goblet of Fire happens and you can notice the first change that will exponentially grow through the books: instead of Ron, pureblood Ron, born-before-the-end-of-the-war Ron, lived-through-the-aftermath-of-the-war Ron, identifying the Dark Mark, it’s instead Hermione, muggleborn Hermione, lived-as-a-Muggle-for-most-of-her-life Hermione, has-no-idea-about-the-emotional-impact-of-the-Mark Hermione who looks terrified as the Dark Mark shoots into the sky!

And it only will get worse, by the end of the series, Hermione pretty much knows about everything the plot needs her to know, instead of having to work with things she knows but can’t always apply to the situation:

Suddenly has a deep knowledge of Magical Law (in the will of Dumbledore’s chapter, while we had Rufus Scrimgeour who could have provided it to us, or to a lesser extent, Ron could have explained how a wizarding will basically worked)

Is suddenly an expert at finding edible plants and mushrooms. Apparently books are always the goddamn answer in JKR’s world, you can literally learn anything from them

She can decipher all the Tales of Beedle the Bard (may I remind you that they were written in Runes, okay Hermione may have a few years of Ancient Runes education BUT I once tried to translate a 3k+ story I had written for fun, from French to English, which means I knew what the subtleties and intentions were, I knew which turns of phrase I had to preserve so it would make sense in the end, and it still took me two gruelling weeks to get a satisfying result!)

Has suddenly grown a sense of quick-thinking (escaping Xenophilius’ house, using the jinx to make Harry’s face weird-looking) despite it being the only remaining flaw she had at the time (remember when she turned her back on her enemy while he was still conscious just to compliment Harry, and almost died as a result, even though she had been training in the DA to learn how to fight Death Eaters?) Quick-thinking under pressure can be learned, but it takes time and a lot of work to force your brain to override its instinct - and it’s fine because we’re all human and different. But no suddenly Hermione is the Greatest Strategist Evah™ and those silly boys (who actually were the original quick-thinking ones, and one of them was established as the strategist early on) better be grateful for this literal goddess because she protects them from all harm with her superhuman brain.

Somehow knows about Quidditch stuff - she knows about a Snitch’s “memory-touch”. Why should she give all the answers? Why can’t Ron give us this particular tidbit of information?

And then when we come to something Ron actually knows, the damn narration itself goes “woah a book that Ron has read but Hermione hasn’t??? shocking!! incredible!! Ron is not dumb, somebody call the news channel”. But… is that really so surprising? We’ve never seen Hermione read wizarding fiction or even Muggle fiction. We’ve never seen Hermione with anything other than schoolbooks in her hands. Of course Ron has read books she hasn’t read since she doesn’t seem to read fiction at all!

Sorry, bit of a tangent over here.

There are only two characters that you can put it convincingly into their dialogue.

So, that’s one part of the problem: the fact that Rowling, after making Ron our insight into magical culture and Hermione our provider of knowledge, ended up saying “eh whatever I guess Hermione can tell us everything we gotta know because it’s more convenient for me”. Which is a decision that was not based on Hermione’s character, but simply lazy writing. Long story short, it probably went: “Could Ron explain this bit of trivia? Meh, better make Hermione say it cause she’ll have read it in a book. It’s convenient and I won’t need to bother myself with exploring Ron’s characterisation.”

(And thus completely forgetting that Ron could maybe ask his big brothers via owl and provide us with a good heap of extra advanced knowledge - Bill is supposed to have aced his NEWTs after all.)

The other part of the problem is quite simply that Hermione is more often than not, either painted as a victim by the narrative (which makes more people take her side, classic manipulation tactic), or made to be right anytime it’s about a plot point.

Hermione’s mistakes are never explicitly stated, corrected, or even pointed out as being unethical.

Hermione only gets one mistake expressedly pointed out as being a mistake: her misadventure in Polyjuice Potion. The rest of them? Even her crush on Lockhart can’t be counted as a mistake - people get crushes all the time, based solely on physical appearance, it’s not something awful or terrible (Except when it’s Ron who crushes on someone. Ron crushing on someone is absolutely forbidden, and he must be punished with much ridicule and humiliation if he thinks he can get away with not worshipping Hermione like the goddess she is. The nerve of him, really.).

Throughout the books Hermione eventually morphs into Rowling’s Powerful Angel of Vengeance, that punishes the people who dared to do something she disliked - Rita is silenced but at a very ethically dubious price; Marietta gets scarred for life because she was more loyal to her mother than to a bunch of people her friend insisted she hang out with; Umbridge is led to a very, very alarming fate that is never made clear but some people have ideas and they’re not all very kid-friendly; Ron first is “helped” without knowing it because Hermione can’t be bothered to have faith in his capabilities, then when he fails to dutifully reward her for “helping” him, she causes him bodily harm before actively bullying him for not mind-reading her interest in him; causes even more bodily harm to Ron because that’s how feminism works; etc.

Hermione’s mistakes are always justified through the plot itself (which is lazy writing).

Turning into a cat? Only affects her.

The Firebolt? Scabbers? Well, in the end, it was really sent by Sirius Black and Crookshanks really wasn’t the culprit. Therefore all the feelings that were hurt and all the trust lost are irrelevant because Hermione was right all along.

Trying to free the house-elves? Well, it’s the intent that counts, right? And we’re never told enough about house-elf lore to know whether they’re poor brainwashed victims or powerful Penate-like symbiotes who need to serve a wizard to survive?

Kidnapping Rita Skeeter, trapping her and blackmailing her? Rita may be one foul little beetle, but that’s going a bit far, isn’t it? Harry approves? Oh, well, I guess it’s okay then…? A main character can’t have a dubious morality, right?

Manipulating Harry into forming Dumbledore’s Army and forcing him to relive a traumatic event with the same woman she’s kidnapped and blackmail and that she knows he hates? In the end, it all works out for the best and Harry’s hurt feelings don’t matter since it’s all about the greater good.

Using the centaurs to get rid of Umbridge (which poses the highly distressing question of what did the centaurs do to her?), realizing that the centaurs aren’t nice little horsies that are going to gently obey her every orders like good Disney princess’ companions, my goodness could this be an opportunity for character growth - nevermind, here comes Grawp the Giant Ex Machina, saving her arse and protecting Hermione from all that scary possibility of introspection. Thanks, Grawp Ex Machina.

Trying to dissuade a highly stressed-out and irrational Harry from rescuing Sirius by telling him exactly what he needed not to hear, a.k.a. “you have a saving people-thing” which causes Harry to completely go bonkers and go save his godfather without thinking twice? Well she was right after all, it was a trap! Nevermind how mind-boggingly insenstive and inadept at dealing with someone else’s feelings she was being, she was right! That means it wasn’t Hermione’s mistake!… probably. (Geez, I’m sensing a pattern here…)

Endangering Cormac’s life (Confunding him WHILE HE’S ON HIS BROOM) to promote Ron’s success? Oh but that’s so romantic! (Yeaaaah, how romantic to display exactly how much faith you lack in your crush. Top it off with a broken neck and that’s a picture perfect first date!)

Assaulting Ron with magic and causing him even more scars than he already had? But he was being cold with her first, right? And he totally should have known she was asking him out! It’s not like her invitation was even worse than his attempt to ask her out two years earlier! Plus she’s just a teenage girl expressing her emotions, anyone who tries to find fault in this is a disgusting abusive misogynist pig! Ha!

Getting all jealous that Harry is better than her at Potions, then pretending she’s not jealous by claiming that TEH BOOK IS EVIL, HARRY, and giving him the cold shoulder too? But no, she’s right, look, Harry used Sectumsempra and he almost killed Draco, nevermind that he’s very horrified about it! Hermione was right, like she always is!

Hermione Obliviating her parents, which pulls her from the “ethically dubious” zone into the “wow okay I’m pretty sure that this counts as a violation of basic human rights” zone, makes her one of those quirky wizardfolk who have the privilege to control those simple-minded Muggles because it’s for the greater good? But nooo she’s crying about it so it’s obviously very sad and angsty and it shows her devotion to the cause!

Splinching Ron while fleeing from the Ministry? Eeeh, but he’s fine, they’ve got Dittany, he’s good as new!… blood loss? Anaemia? What’s that?

Hermione was wrong about the Deathly Hallows not existing? Um, um, that doesn’t matter, LOOK DOBBY IS DEAD AND HARRY IS BACK TO LOOKING FOR THE HORCRUXES!! Therefore Hermione was right, the Hallows weren’t important for their quest, therefore the Hallows might as well not exist, HERMIONE WAS RIGHT NO REALLY I’VE GOT RECEIPTS -

The books never forget to remind Harry and Ron of their own shortcomings and moments of weakness.

Harry’s wrath and recklessness cost Sirius his life. This is the lesson he has to learn from his entitled behaviour in OotP: actions have consequences, and the greater your responsibility, the greater the cost will be.

Ron’s envy and insecurity lead him astray; they’re used to humiliate, ridicule and torture him throughout the books. They’re supposed to teach him that he’s worth something - but how is he supposed to believe that, when nobody ever tells him he’s worth anything? When nobody ever apologizes to him? When his feelings are taken for granted over and over? When his two friends seem to discard him whenever he does one thing wrong?

Hermione is never punished. Hermione is never said to be wrong, never shown to be wrong, never called out on her behaviour. From Prisoner of Azkaban to mid-Deathly Hallows, she stays exactly the same character. She doesn’t grow up. She doesn’t learn. She doesn’t change. She has virtually no character arc.

The only time, THE ONLY TIME IN SEVEN BOOKS, the only time we have something remotely resembling a call-out of Hermione’s horrible behaviour is with this sole quote in HBP:

Harry was left to ponder in silence the depths to which girls would sink to get revenge.

Note how it’s about “girls” and not Hermione in particular, which implies that any girl would do what Hermione does to Ron. Thanks for the generalization, JKR, but I like to believe I’m actually a decent sort of person that doesn’t resort to petty cruelty and exploits my friends’ insecurities whenever I’m angry with them.

Hermione NEVER has to apologize. Hermione NEVER has to learn from her mistakes because she’s always presented as a victim when she really isn’t. Hermione NEVER develops into something more - she’s emotionally stuck at fourteen years old. Even less than that when you consider that her reaction to Ron’s return in Deathly Hallows is to trash him with her fists - and she was going to get her wand!! The utter psychopathic b- wanted TO THROW BIRDS AT HIM AGAIN!!! - and this reaction is an appropriate one for a four-years old girl, but certainly not for a supposedly “mature” seventeen-years old.

(Yes, because what separates a child from an adult is the ability to reign in your emotions and not succumb to your impulses. Exactly what Ron did when he left the tent (notice that he had drawn his wand, then he left before he could start hexing Harry), he left to calm himself down. Exactly what Hermione fails to do when Ron returns (she has the impulse to strike him and immediately succumbs to it, which proves to us that The Brightest Witch Of Her Age has all the maturity of a very small child).)

All of that, on top of the awful portrayal in the movies which removes all of Ron’s characteristics to stuff them into Hermione and turns her into some impossible epitome of perfection, eventually contributed to the portrayal of Hermione as the one who is always right and knows everything.

Add to it JKR’s own ridiculous bias (“Ron was quite emotionally immature compared to the other two”, yeah right I don’t see him trying to force freedom onto unwilling creatures or making Harry fly into an irrational rage with mere words but you do you, Jo) and the sexist misconception that “girls are innately more mature than boys”, and you get yourself this apparent behemoth of righteousness that was literally the sole reason why those two silly boys survived everything, and don’t you dare criticize this angel of perfection OR ELSE.

[silent-mysteriousguy]

I saw another post on @postalninja doing this meme, thought i would join in on the fun!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

10 and counting! 9 for octopath traveler (not counting the one disowned fic) and 1 for the Grishaverse

2) What's your total AO3 word count?

37 702

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

As anyone who ever spared even a glance at my tumblr account knows, I love Octopath. Its my comfort game and is definetly one of my favourite games of all time. On the other hand, the grishaverse fic was a contest fic. I love that book a lot as well but it never came close to my damned love for that game

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

About women’s problems, lack of sleep and bluntness: Oh, that lil thing. It was my first fanfic I had written in years! It doesnt have the best writing but it does have a special place in ma heart

A Diary’s Importance: My ongoing longfic. Its as of date not completed, but its going somewhere eh! Luckily finally got a beta, so progress is there folks. But alas, currently on vacay so writing is out of the question.

Why phones and the 8 travelers should not be combined: A silly textfic I wrote to get myself out of writersblock. Believe me, I thirst for textfics I NEED MORE.

Sharp, stabby things: Well, if it wasnt obvious enough, im halfblind. Meaning I am actually unable to see shit from my right eye. So sense of depth does not exist. So when I discovered Therion would likely have the same struggles with his right eye I decided that damnit I was going to write something about it because the struggles of being halfblind are real folks.

About the practicallity of not being a caster: A little fic I always wanted to do of what a conversation between Cyrus, who got so many magic spells its practicallity his only thing, and Olberic, who got no magic at all, about magic would look like.

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Fuck yeah I do! I love comment so so much. They give me motivation to write and shut the inner Bruno up (if ya get the meaning)

6) What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm, hard one here. Most of the angst in my fic is very much in the middle with the end being happier as I sadly do have a soul. But, my vote goes to a friends betrayal. The fic was basically about Olberics thoughtprocess after the fall of hornburg and what lead him to his situation in beginning of the game. As you can guess, it is very angsty.

7) What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

Many! But, the vote goes to my beloved sharp stabby things. But that can just be my seretonin brain.

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've written?

Not yet… (but i have an idea)

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Some passive agressive comments, but not really hate.

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Nope. Huns, I am ace as fuck i cant even read it.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know.

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

as a polyglot I could do a fine I will do it myself moment, but i havent.

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not as off today, but I am open to the idea of it.

14) What's your all time favourite ship?

Oh boy thats such a tough question. On one hand, gimli x legolas from LOTR will always have a special place in my heart as it was the ship that actually got me into fandom culture. But… if you spared a glance at my ao3 account you know my love for Cyrus and Olberic. I mean my two comfort characters in a relationship? Thats the stuff man thats the good stuff.

15) What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

STUPID A LEGAL DISPUTE. I LOVE THE IDEA OF IT BUT THE WORDS MAN THE WORDS.

16) What are your writing strengths?

I think it would be describing emotions and thoughtprocesses.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

Grammar, no doubt. I mean its not that 9 year old bad but my use of commas is through the damned roof.

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Ahum, as someone who has multiple conlanguages and is a polyglot I adore them. Just wait yall asses till i get a solid idea of what acient hornburgian sounds like and its over for yall. IT WILL BE IN DIARYS IMPORTANCE OR I DONT DESERVE MY SCRIVINER.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Suprisingly, it was Percy Jackson. A Solangelo fic to be precise. Oh i cringe at it every time I see it.

20) What's your favourite fic you've written?

Brand’s Thunder,  no doubts about it. It was the transition to my longer fics and I impressed myself with my own writing which was new.

[thelibrarina]

Fic meme!

I was tagged by @shitpostingfromthebarricade​. Thanks, this was fun!

how many works do you have on AO3?

61. Now I have to add more words to this line or it becomes a giant number. Oh, tumblr, never change.

what’s your total AO3 word count? 

527,746. Half a million words. Damn.

how many fandoms have you written for and what are they? 

On AO3? 14, though some are fusions. The primary ones are Les Mis, The Professionals, MCU, Vikings, and Star Wars.

what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Grounds for Dismissal (exr coffee-shop AU)

2. Friday I’m In Love (exr fake dating AU)

3. But I’m Hopeful Yet (exr wrong suitcase AU)

4. Pining for You (exr hallmark holiday movie AU)

5. Still the Same (exr White Collar AU)

Gee, do you see a pattern here?

More below the cut, as we said in the olden days...

do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I want to, I swear!! But the process goes like this: I see the comment and I have to sit and bask in the warm happy glow, and then I get distracted while thinking of something to say and suddenly it’s been two years and then it feels a little awkward, right? So this is just to say: If you have ever commented on my fic, I see you and I love you and I cherish every word. Thank you.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I am bad at angst. Probably the fics with the saddest endings are In Fire (exr Pacific Rim fusion) and We Will Become Silhouettes (Professionals episode-tag drabble--it’s not clear without context, but they sort of explode at the end).

Honorable mention to Even After All These Years, which has the angstiest beginning. 

have you ever received hate on a fic?

I once got scolded in an AO3 comment for using the fandom tag correctly. Also someone yelled at me on ff.n for mentioning America in a positive context in a Les Mis songfic. (There were so many better reasons to yell at me for that fic, tbh.)

do you write smut? if so what kind?

The highly fraught and overly emotional kind. Also sometimes the iambic pentameter kind, or the alliterative verse kind.

For years I could only get myself to write smut for the semi-annual p*rn battle that was held on dreamwidth. It was super-handy for shutting up my inner editor and locking my inhibitions in a cupboard somewhere.

have you ever had a fic stolen?

Scraped to a random website, yeah, but not stolen.

have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Grounds for Dismissal was translated in to Chinese, and a few other fics have podfic versions, too!

have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not to completion, but writing with friends is a joy even if we never finish things. 

what’s your all time favorite ship?

Don’t make me choose, it’s mean. But Enjolras and Grantaire have had my whole heart for quite some time now.

what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

All of my as-yet-incomplete Les Mis fics are in a shared word doc. It is longer than my total AO3 word count. There’s a college professor AU (exr, of course) that has gotten hugely bloated and might or might not be fixable.

But I will finish the indulgent Batman AU someday. Mark my words.

what are your writing strengths?

Banter! And replicating a voice or a style. 

what are your writing weaknesses?

Action and smut. What are bodies? What do they do? How many limbs to they usually have, again? I don’t even know.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Storytime! I was the only non-Classics major in my Latin class, and my professor would regularly start writing shit on the board in Greek. I would have to raise my hand and remind him that I couldn’t understand it.

And that’s all I want: to understand what I’m reading. Whether the author uses translations or context clues, or just indicates in the header or the notes that you need to know multiple languages to understand the fic, I’m cool with it.

(Also consider not italicizing words from other languages when you put them in a sentence. Daniel Jose Older has a great 2-minute video on it here.)

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

Somewhere in my parents’ house is a blue spiral-bound notebook with a printed label that says Star Wars Novel on it. I think I was 11 or 12 and it was a Young Jedi Knights continuation. So...that one.

what’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Usually, whatever fic I’ve finished most recently. But I’m really proud of The Glorious People’s Republic of the Cafe Musain. I can’t claim a hundredth of Terry Pratchett’s skill, but trying on his style was an absolute blast, and there are some lines in those fics that I’m still genuinely delighted by.

[johannepetereric]

Ok, new idea for the Season 3 rewrite! 

Ok, so Aichi joined the Miyaji Academy choir (99% girls, huge cast, mostly serious). The ones they (Aichi) actually interact with as human-to-human are the few casuals in it. They (the casuals) don’t join any field trips or competitions, so it’s more of an idol-anime-club than anything else. This was on the roster, so they (Aichi) asked about that. The girl said that the casuals are left out of competing, so they are cool with it. Though they hold off on it officially until they get the Cardfight Club established first. The club gets word of thus, so they devise a plan to get them in. After school, Day 1, they give Aichi a stack of papers as an introduction to the club (an introductory course of sorts). No signings or anything, but the basic voice drills and links are on there. After Shingo comes into play, Aichi visits the (choir) club room. He is immediately greeted with confetti and party poppers (they saw him at the gate) at the door. They test his capabilities with a song of his choice. Unfortunately, Aichi sings a Cray song (the “alien accent” they’d right away come to term it as). This one garners a “idk wtf you’re saying, but I like the melody and vibe” reaction. Kinda like with any other foreign-lamguage song. He still gets applause, though--they liked it on principle, but the accent of off-putting. The “you’re an alien trying to fit in” thing becomes a(n inside) joke. Aichi admits that he’s never learned how to sing like an earthling properly, so that’s what he’s here for. This is his first school club, much less voice club.  This gathers much pity. Turns out the choir club as a whole has TWO rooms. One for the casuals (here), and one huge room for the main group (everyon else, the focus and faces of the club. No one knows of the casuals until they inquire into the club). Aichi decides to hang out with them. Every night or so at 8 (maybe just once a week at minimum, half the time), they gather in the park or the room to help each other learn to sing (like an earthling) as they’ve always done. Aichi is now part of an idol-anime. This club is hwere he/they gather(s) most of the Vanguard songs (that sound idol-ish). One he’s left Miyaji, he had officially learned how to do away with the alien dialogue/dialect in public.

The group still keeps in contact, though.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In case you’re wondering, the council is cool with non-heteronormative folks cuz “as long as it doesn’t impede your schooling, it doesn’t matter what you identify as.” The purple-haired dude (Suwabe???) is a FINE example. So everyone’s cool with NOT misgendering people (Aichi, in this case. Though he’s/they’re not the only one who identifies as a different genders. Not-straight characters are more common though (working harder than normal to justify their place in society???idk--I’m just a cis straight girl viewing gayness from a fangirl/spectator/outside perspective))

But, like, imagine Toshiki-kun just going for a walk that late at night and hearing something strange:

Toshiki: Am I hearing...an angel’s voice? ( “With another?” if it isn’t a solo)

He walks, cloudy-eyed in a trance-like state, towards the music that sounds like one just randomly died and went to heaven. In a clearing is Aichi singing a song, maybe Earth, maybe Cray and trying his best to sing it like an Earthling (though that will never work, and the Sendou knows it. Aichi’s just doing it for “the crew” (the casuals, his new clique). It has to be Earth songs. The best he can do is singing Cray but with an Earth accent (and even then, it still sounds incomprehensible to most Earthlings)), and Toshiki-kun is just paralyzed, detached from reality, dragged into Cray sometimes if it’s a Cray tune via Psyqualia. Just *sigh* the Kaichi. It’s a romance-anime moment when he’s discovered in that trance-and-staring, flustered both included sometimes.

Yeah, I am requesting my readers (since I actually get updates on who’s viewing my works (unlike on Wattpad and ao3 *disappointed, melancholic sigh*)) to help me (again. Nobody is helpful. Ever. I have to ask my friends, and then it’s--in their opinion, I’m talking gibberish--one of my “Special Interest” stuff ADHD Awareness Tumblr users post about. 

Ok, gather up your knowledge, your memories of idol anime, mermaid anime, moei and BanG Dream, singing-whatever, your musical-whatevers, your slice-of-life anime (may or not have a club involved), cute romance-whatevers, whatever to give me (us) ideas as to how we going to make original content for this AU timeline. This season I plan to start the buildup for Misaki x Kourin, so prepare your fics. Whatever fanfiction you want to advertise, please add disclaimers and the link(s), cuz plagiarism exists, and send it to me. Maybe even stuff like “there’s this fic with plot blablab-blah” and I shout-out disclaimers (shoutout to ma reader (maybe I’d give ur name) who read a fic with plot blablab-blah and I’m just gonna reblog the damn thing. And..)and I might be adding fics where it’s just copy-pasting the plot (the “Can I copy you?” “Sure. Just write it a little different so they think it isn’t copied” (???) meme-thing) and I thusly must link the source(s).

But yeah, Episode 15 is not exactly gonna be a rewrite. It’s just--same day, but the plot is completely elsewhere in town, and the actions that did happen in the episode is gonna stay exactly the same (well, added internal monologue, but that’s different), so it’s gonna be somewhere else.

Also, I’m having it so that, early in Season 1, Aichi drags Miwa to the Underground Cardfighter’s Hidout (Jun) to introduce him to his (future) boyfriend. Shortly after meeting the dude (beware the Trigger Warnings. They’ll be there for that one), Miwa gets less uncomfortable around Jun enough so that they’re f**kbuddies. Aichi knows IMMEDIATELEY, so he often teases Miwa about it (also as a way to get the blond off Kai if the brunet is clearly feeling uncomfortable/disturbed by said annoyance). I planned for it to be this episode, but now idk...contradicting timelines...This happens BEFORE Miwa is chained up to lure in Kai, so I need a pinpoint before then. PLEASE give me your opinions of when you want this to happen (by measure of Episode, as I do). This is just Aichi being scary (evil) and morally gray/ambiguous. K? HELP AN AUTHOR OUT!!! 

And yeah, the gender changes in this status update were necessary. Get it over with beforehand n’ all.

[pilferingapples]

TMA S2 Natter I guess!!

LORE LORE LORE LORE WHOOO

under the cut for massive major spoilers of course

- I’m really glad I’m binging this, it helps me remember things to have a big chunk of story and lots to pick up on all stacked together and reinforcing itself. I still have to check and double check the Fan Wiki for names here and there, when I hear someone I KNOW I recognize from earlier; I’ve inevitably run across some spoilers that way, thanks to the structure of the wiki, so I’m really glad I’m needing to do that less and less as the show goes on; I don’t think I had to check anything in the last ten episodes, thought I did still have to go to the wiki to get links to the Transcripts, because 

- I find the tunnel-echo effects make the dialogue pretty unparseable no matter how loud I have the show, unfortunately. I could understand Michael,and not much else. (I mean,I could understand Michael’s voice, the Spiral’s motives and all are fairly opaque to me still.) The voices and acting lend so much ambiance, I would have been happy to watch along on the YT vid with subtitles , but it doesn’t have subtitles? Frustrating, but I do  really appreciate there being transcripts! 

- Michael makes me really, really sad. He was just a kid who stayed out in the rain a second too late! It wasn’t even his idea! And he got Marked and he lost his whole damn life to this thing before he was even old enough to have a good grasp on what reality is in the normal swing of things. Poor kid. Poor Michael-that-should-have-been. (ETA so I don’t answer this multiple times: I’m aware Lightning-and-Tower Michael might not be Hallways and Hands Michael, but this is just name-association, really.  Also, there’s a growing horror in S2 in finding so many people who seemed to escape their encounters showing  up again in much worse shape in other Statements...)

- Thanks to Tumblr Osmosis , I’m  sure the Endgame OTP (at least so far) in Jon/Martin, and while I’m currently not a fan of that (though totally prepared to change my mind according to character/relationship development!) I am  delighted to be able to enjoy Jon and Basira’s relationship without worrying that her character is going to be suddenly smashed flat to make her The Love Interest. I love their weird uneasy alliance!  I hope she comes back but also hope she goes somewhere Far Away and lives Ordinarily Ever After. 

-on that note, Daisy Daisy Daisy bring back Daisy, I don’t usually get into cop characters but WEIRD CRYPTID FORCE COPS are apparently a potential weakness for me  (..also I know, I know  they are probably Hunt-aligned. I’ve already said I’m unfortunately Weak for The Hunt ).  

-I miss Actual!Sasha >:

- Tim is seriously the only person in this whole damn institute with any self preservation either supernatural or normal??  “Yeah you’re right I don’t like the boss who stalks me and keeps secrets about a situation which is directly about my own personal safety like I was the enemy and takes his trauma out on me directly while I’m recovering from,in this case , exactly the same trauma thanks “

Martin: Wow Tim you’re so selfish, how can you even think about fleeing our supernatural hellscape, why aren’t you more concerned with the guy who is very overtly considering you a potential enemy and crossing all boundaries in a way that, in any normal job, would right off be enough to get HR and maybe the cops involved?  WHY ARE YOU BEING SO UNREASONABLE, TIM??...Now excuse me while I run to my probable death with no preparation in defense of a guy who seems to go out of his way to hit my very obvious emotional weak points and considered me so useless  he thought I might be dead already, because unlike you I am making good decisions!!! LEEEROY JENKINNNSSSSS”

-honestly the apparent connection between why the Institute/Elias accepted Martin as sacrifice an employee and Martin’s emotional Everything is both screamingly apparent and worth an essay all on its own , that’s some Good Charactering

-I never trusted Elia-- Never Trust the Boss Of Shadowy Organization With Mysterious Backers, that’s my motto-- but HE KILLED THE INFODUMP SOURCE. HOW DARE. INSTANT LEAST FAVE.

- I KNEW LEITNER WAS A RESEARCHER I KNEW IT I KNEW IT, who has a vast occult library BUT never really figures in any accounts of actually DOING anything?? AN OCCULT NERD DOING RESEARCH.  (I say, well aware that *I* did not do my research as fully as I’d like here, to avoid spoilers, and thus may be forgetting a Big Thing he apparently did)

- I did NOT know he was still alive?? and totally didn’t see him working with Gertrude (it was actually Gert’s Occult Book Hunting that made me slap my head and go OH RIGHT about Leitner!) 

-I want to know more about Gertrude 

- The OH NO moment I had during Leitner’s description of obvious multiple entities working together to just wreck his shop!!  BAD, BAD, THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE OF AAAAAH IS BAD 

- also now I know for sure that the Web and the Stranger are enemies? this puts at least 2/3 Fear Entities that could, I am aware , pretty much have me as a pawn for a cheap ice-cream cone allied against the one  Entity that makes me absolutely go into Screaming Phobia Murder Mode, I don’t know if everyone’s feeling the same way or if this is just the show happening to find my particular keys like that 

-...listen Elias is THE WORRRRSSSST and I am sure The Institute is Not Good but if The Stranger existed and was A Thing like this then they wouldn’t have  to Play me to get my assistance on taking it out , every single episode about it makes me go Mad Raccoon in A Box ,  I want it gone, the enemy of the Stranger is my ...slightly less enemy 

-Jonnycakes Sims is the Avatar of the Human Trainwreck, but I did not realize until this episode that he does not drink coffee??  I’m torn between thinking he should and thinking all caffeine should be taken away from him forever. 

-Also, Dammit, Jonet, this “keeping info about supernatural horror schemes from my team For Their Own Good” nonsense?  BAD , you are not a Victorian patriarch and they are not your children, GIVE THEM A FIGHTING CHANCE YOU GOOBER, DID YOU EVER READ ONE GOTHIC NOVEL, IGNORANCE IS DEATH 

- ..HOW DID YOU DECIDE TO SMASH THE TABLE YOU. GOOBER PIE.   I take it back, definitely Jonny needs to drink all the more caffeine. 

--in conclusion, ELIAS TOOK MY LORE HOOKUP AND HE MUST PAY FOR HIS CRIMES. 

(Supplemental:P) 

I'm getting the impression, from responses to my earlier little post, that people don't? like Tim ?? and I am Afraid this means he is Something Horrible?? but he's fun and friendly and smart and reacting like a human with normal human self-preservation instincts + a touch of Heroic honestly?? why do people not like Tim, is he a secret Horror, NO DON'T ACTUALLY TELL ME but  D:  NERVOUS NOW

[jinxofthedesert]

Hi there! Annoying anon that loves rambling about the Valeska twins is here again 🤣 Let the discussion continue! 😂 Yeah, I totally get your point of writing such stories as a means of fulfilling wishes. I guess it makes sense from the writer's pov that they want to give these characters a different (better) treatment. Valid point, but still, they don't feel real to me.

(Below this is the rest of the messages, put together. Farther down, below the line, are my responses)

It's like I'm reading a story with a character that's called Jerome/Jeremiah Valeska and looks exactly like him, but it's not truly him (just like you said, at their cores they are bad guys). But it's perfectly understandable and all right that people want to give them a rest from their chaotic lives haha 😊 everybody’s got their cup of tea ☕

Damn, yes, these stories are so hard to find! I imagine that writing something of the sort and investing so much in such complex characters can be draining and daunting, so yeah I get the reason why there are not so many fics out there... and OCs are so difficult to write haha you are right. They take too much time and effort 🤣

Yeah, I guess Ecco was not the best example. It's very true what you say about Jeremiah's and Ecco's relationship. In the show it was portrayed as a professional one. So we don't really know if there's anything else beyond that, save for some level of concern. So I guess I should have gone with Bruce instead because, just like you said, Jeremiah went totally bonkers when he realized that Bruce was the only one who saw past his resemblance to Jerome.

Basically, what I was trying to say is that in these fics there's not really that same vibe of evil obsession and lunacy from the twin's side. Maybe just some sort of heightened jealousy when their partner is addressed by other characters, but not in a really "Valeska" way. In fact, it is also strange when Bruce is completely absent in these stories when the twins' obsession revolves around him.

Yeah, there is sooo much to explore, so that is why I am very curious to see how people construe their backgrounds, but usually it's just the repetition of the show with some added scenes and dialogues here and there 😅 I would love to see something a bit different, but well, I guess I am being very demanding 🤣 Don't worry about it and thanks so much for replying! 😘 I am now doing some research in different sites 🤣

It's a bit weird because even though I enjoyed the show, I have to say I merely watched it to see ma broski boys in action 🤣 so If I wasn't so lazy (and didn't have other unfinished projects) I would try to write something (my mind is already full of vague ideas OMGGG 😏🤔😂), but I don't really know much about other characters or subplots, so I would not be sure how to tackle it 🤔 Thanks again for the lovely discussion! 😊

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Hi anon! Don’t you worry about your rambles, they’re not at all annoying! I find it rather fun to discuss the twins. 

I’m sorry you’ve not been able to find the content you’re looking for; usually, I always run into comments on Tumblr or Pinterest about how you look for certain fics and when you can’t find them, then it’s time to try a hand at writing it yourself. I’ve done that and, even though I enjoy writing, it’s still pretty hard, especially to find a drive to do it when I really am not feeling it.  With the twins not feeling real, I understand, ‘course I now think I’m at the point where I might read anything if I’m gifted with more content lol (though there are some tags that, if I see them, I don’t touch if I can help it). 

I think, usually, with most writers, it’s easier to take a character like Jerome/Jeremiah and, instead of doing the tremendous work that comes with trying (emphasis trying) to change them, they do a few things and that’s enough for a road to recovery. Because, most of the time, they’re not writing to change the character, or even to make it realistic; sometimes they’re just writing, or they wanted to try a different aspect. There can be so many reasons and sometimes digging deep and getting a character 100% correct isn’t at the top of the list of what you want in that story. Personally, I’ve learned to broaden my sense of disbelief with characters and just enjoy what I manage to find, especially since the Gotham fic-oriented content is sooooo small 😢

After reading your last message, I actually went onto Ao3 and searched ‘character studies’ under the characters and yeah, there’s not much, I read a few and I honestly wasn’t sure what to think (not to call anyone out). It reminded me a lot of my years reading batjokes on fanfiction or, again, Ao3 where, if you search long enough, there’s a fic for almost all your needs. There have been some good gems in there that delve into character studies and helping these characters try and become better. Comparing that to Gotham’s arrangement of fics is sad, to say the least, but batjokes in all media have a lottttt of years to have such a collection of wonderful content. (Even if you’re only a Gotham fan, stretching out into the actual Batman fandom can be very rewarding, even if your next step is into the Nolan movies or even Batman in general cause you can replace the characters in your head if you really want too)  I think one big problem with Oc’s is that, in a way, they’re easy to make, but in the worst way. You can create a character to put in the place you want, a blank space and they’re just nothing. This comes up a lot in anime type works, where the main character is so blah for the purpose of the audience (reader in our other case) to put themselves in the place of the main character. This also happens in a lot of movies as well, instead of fleshing the character out and allowing them to move and breathe the way THEY would and not how the audience thinks they themselves would. Because of this, oc’s can be very flat. There are the exception, of course although I have no examples since I don’t remember the last Oc story I read . . .  *wracks brain* yeah no idea. Though I’m sure it’s somewhere in my saves.

Even if one doesn’t ship Jeremiah with Bruce, it’s very difficult to ignore/brush under the rug that there was definitely an obsession and that originally, during their weeks of spending time together, building the generator, there started a friendship. The first is very obvious, show-wise (and friendship kinda came with the territory) and the gay subtext can be there if you look at it that way. As much as an interesting character Ecco is, she’s both not important enough in the show (sorry Ecco lovers) or to Jeremiah or to anyone for that matter. While with Bruce and Jeremiah, with how their first meeting go’s and all the meetings that follow after (very willingly on Jeremiah’s part even though I’m sure before this NO ONE was allowed in the inner parts of his bunker for long periods. Probably not even Ecco) the relationship is much more pronounced than anything we’re given prior.  I like to think that even though Bruce was manipulating Jeremiah when they first met, he actually did see him as his own person. Even though he, like Jim and Harvey, have personally bore witness to Jerome’s tyranny. (And that only twists the knife harder when Jeremiah eventually loses his mind because both him and Jeremiah saw him as his own person and in a way Jeremiah doesn’t become like Jerome, he becomes worse)

One could argue that since we didn’t see a ‘true’ way the Valeska’s love that any type of them showing affection might never seem very Valeska. Unless one looks at their reactions and interactions with Bruce as something more than just ‘wanting to kill him’ or ‘obsession’. This would be another reason I’m don’t read much in the oc-area or out of the romantic’s lol mainly because the moment they take Bruce out of the picture, everything seems off. Jerome, while willing to divide his attention, only does it with specific people, who are: Jim, Bruce, Jeremiah, and, on occasion, Oswald (though he’s much less in comparison to the ‘big three’). Other then them, we don’t see him hyper-focus on anyone else in the show, and if he does, it’s for a second and to simply kill them after. If these three aren’t integral to his behavior and actions then things feel flat and out-right ignoring his obsession with Bruce and his inner darkness can be unrealistic. With Jeremiah, this is much worse because in canon, once No Man’s Land starts, all he can think about is Bruce. Everything he does in that setting and before this even started was for Bruce. This type of obsession is . . . well, something that can’t simply be ignored, it’s a big part of his character and also very integral to just who he is after the spray. It may not be as bad at the start of the spray (because he’s too busy rebuilding Gotham in his image) but literally second to that desire is his connection with Bruce. If there were a summary of Jeremiah as a character it would be IMPOSSIBLE to write it without Bruce (same with Jerome though his might be a footnote, depending). So him suddenly focusing on someone else is . . . odd (even with Jim he doesn’t give his full attention too and, in the finale, Jeremiah only starts moving around and doing shit when he realizes that Bruce has come home early and that it’s time to finally come back to the spotlight). Especially since he’s supposed to be the ‘Joker’ in the Gotham world, which, technically speaking, means this obsession with the Bat (a.k.a Bruce) will only ever get worse from here (not to mention the fact he knows Batman is Bruce because he remembers the prophecy Ra’s told him, which we’re shown in the finale when he first sees the Bat and comment’s ‘you’ in a knowing way; this can be argued he’s just recognizing that this is what the prophecy was talking about or that it’s Bruce but personally I think both cause the prophecy was about both of them.).

It’s hard not to repeat things in canon though, believe me, I know and if you ever try writing a time travel story, it’s much worse cause then you have to change literally everything if you’re doing it that way.  Nah, you know what you like; the only problem with that is it’ll be hard to find it most of the time. I wish you luck in searching! Hopefully, you’ll find something.

Same. My older brother introduced me to the show and his way of doing so was first telling me it was a batman show, that I would LOVE Oswald’s aesthetic and that there was a Joker-type character just introduced. I was sold lol. There’s been a lot of drama with the show though, concerning the twins and I honestly wish they’d just stuck with Jerome or if they did still use Jeremiah that he wasn't just . . . a backup plan for killing Jerome off. And, if they’d been allowed to go on for a few more seasons, I wouldn’t have been surprised if they would have also killed Jeremiah and a third (never heard of) Valeska twin (triplet) would show up, playing into the overall Joker lore about there having been three. 😒🤨😑 Which I find humorous because they did so well with Jerome, he was a well-rounded, fleshed out character and, as much as I love Jeremiah, it’s hard not to consider what we could have gotten if Jerome had lived *wistful sigh* I won’t lie that the drama hasn’t affected how I watch it too these days, or at least left me with a lasting impression.  I was very invested in the first few seasons, it was a good show, minus the plot-holes and annoying characters (yes, some annoy me and there are some I can’t stand) but when the twins were on screen, it was probably the show at its best. If they had implicated them more so into the main story I probably would have watched all the way to the end (I can admit, I’ve never seen season five, but I saw many clips, have been completely spoiled and DID watch the finale lol and . . . I think I saw some of season four? Maybe, not sure anymore.) because when they’re also interacting with Bruce, perfection. I could watch that shit for days. 

Also, if you did write it, it wouldn’t have to be about other characters if you don’t want it to be. You’re talking to me, who has never seen the last few seasons and when I wrote my first fic ‘Blindly Evident’ literally all my scenes I had to LOOK UP because I only knew the base of what the scene was even about lol. So sometimes, you can totally bullshit your way lol and somehow it turns out to be really good and you like it. Or it’s just snippets of small scenes with your characters (I’ve been writing a fic like that for awhile because it’s fun and easy and yet you can make it so thought provoking because these snippets are so smallll.) I would implore you to give it a go. Even if you have no idea what the other characters are doing or even what their names are. 

I feel like this has just become me rambling about Gotham and writing tips at this point lol but you’re welcome~ I am here to try and help and always willing to listen about Gotham and talk (or rant, I’m not picky lol). Thanks again for your ask, anon! Hope you find that content you’re looking for 🥰🧡💛

[kattahj]

Thoughts on Sword of Destiny

I finished reading Sword of Destiny weeks ago, but never got around to posting thoughts, in part because commenting on every story took some effort, but also because... well, a lot of it is complaining, and I don't want to rain on anyone's parade. But OTOH, there's a part of me that really really wants to gripe, and I did enjoy some of it. So, thoughts.

Story 1: The Bounds of Reason

I have already talked about how the descriptions of Tea and Vea made me feel like I was inside teenage Andrzej Sapkowski's locker room. There's some other not-great stuff too with Yennefer - she gets tied to a wagon, has her shirt ripped off, and the dragon baby seeks comfort in her intimate parts, all of which has Jaskier going "nice!" STFU Jaskier, you're intolerable in this.

(Note to people wondering why I'm still calling him that, I've primarily read the Swedish version, which calls him Riddarsporre, and if I used that name no one would know who I'm talking about. Calling him Dandelion feels weird, since it's neither his original name nor the one in use in the translation. So Jaskier it is.) I even got the English e-book and started taking screencaps of all the passages in this short story that made me roll my eyes over the sexism, and after 15-20 something screencaps I went, "This is way too long for a tumblr post." So now they're just lying around.

Apart from that, it's a nice story. Some things are the same, others very different. There are more people around, which is fine, but I think it was the right choice to cull the herd a bit for the show. There's more explicit discussions around hierarchies, what makes a hero, what makes a monster, and so on.

Interestingly, Geralt and Yennefer's plotline is rather reverse to what it's like in the show. In the book, she arrives pissed as FUCK at Geralt and claims she'll never forgive him, yet by the end of the story they're cozy with each other again. Which of course also means that there's no quarrel between Geralt and Jaskier either. In fact, Jaskier arrives separately and is all, "Oh, hey Geralt, I thought I'd hang around and write a new ballad," and the rest let him stay because, as they put it, he's not of any use but he's not any bother either.

I guess the way it went down in the show was in order to return Yennefer and Geralt to separate storylines for the finale and make sure Geralt is properly isolated too. (And properly grumpy - as someone pointed out, the episodes including Jaskier tend to be lighter than the others, because that's the way he sees them.)

Story 2: A Shard of Ice

In which Yennefer is fucking Geralt and Istredd on alternate days, and Istredd wants to close the relationship and tells Geralt to fuck off because he's an emotionless Witcher, and Geralt pouts. Then Istredd wants to fight to the death, and Geralt accepts, and Yennefer dumps both of their asses, and Istredd wants to fight to the death anyway, and Geralt is like, "uh, no, I'm not here to help you commit suicide" and leaves. Also there's some Snow Queen imagery shoehorned in that really could have been used better.

Yeah, this was pretty much my least favourite story of the lot. I don't like love triangles at the best of times, and this wasn't even a particularly good one. Plus, any time that guys think they can decide between themselves who gets to date a girl, they deserve to be dumped. So I was all, "good for you, Yen, go find someone better." Though of course she won't.

I also started wondering if Yennefer's based on one (or more) of Sapkowski's exes, because there are so many times where Geralt's all, "Why does she act in such a way!?" and I'm all, "I bet if you two ever TALKED PROPERLY you'd find out!"

Like. Damn. I know people complained that their love story in the show was sudden and forced, but I ship them more there than I do in the books so far.

Story 3: Eternal Flame

I quite liked this one! It's a fun little romp and expands nicely on the concept of dopplers, as well as introduces the Nilfgaardian religion. I have a feeling that I've seen the concept somewhere before, where a person imitating a merchant does a better job doing business than the merchant himself. But if it's based on a fairy tale I can't remember which one.

There is some groan-worthy stuff between Jaskier and his ex-girlfriend, but that's so minor it doesn't mar the story much. (I have to say though, book Jaskier is SUCH an asshole, and yet book Geralt is so much nicer to him. It really makes me question Geralt's judgement.)

Story 4: A Little Sacrifice

This one started with some pretty shitty stuff with the little mermaid (showcasing the recurring themes of a) boobs and b) women making demands that can be easily dismissed as unreasonable), but then we got Essi Daven, who was a good, likeable character. I enjoyed reading about her. Even Jaskier was more tolerable in this story! I was all, OMG Sapkowski, you're actually writing a woman well, go you...

...but then of course she instantly fell in love with Geralt (cue Juliet's gay friend: "You met him SUNDAY!") and we're told that she wears his pearl until she dies of smallpox a few years later. Which, of course. Of COURSE a girl who has flirted with the great Geralt of Rivia can't just get over him and live her life in peace. Oh no, it HAS to be disappointment, disfigurement and death.

So ultimately, the bits I liked made me even grumpier about the bits I didn't like. But still, Essi was fun while she lasted.

Story 5: The Sword of Destiny

This is the first one where I actually don't have any complains about Sapkowski's writing of women. The dryads are okay, their story is interesting, and the interactions between Geralt and Ciri are very cute indeed. It's rather sad that we lost those interactions in the show, though it would have been hard to include them with the way it was written, since it all depends on neither Geralt nor the reader knowing who this little kid is. (Though I'm pretty sure even unspoiled readers could guess.) Still, it makes the destiny feel more natural and not just the "family at first sight" thing we got on the show.

I basically only have two gripes, a small one and a big one.

The small one is that it's VERY HARD to take the dryads seriously when part of their Elder Language is barely disguised English slang. I don't know if this was a thing in the Polish edition, or if it happened in the English translation and was then carried through to the Swedish one, but it snaps me right out of the story when they say things like "Bloede arss!"

The big one is that either Sapkowski has no idea how children mature, or Geralt doesn't, because no WAY is Ciri ten or close to it in this story. Now, Geralt is presumably a big guy, so it's not impossible to think that he could carry a smallish 10-year-old on his shoulders... but I have a hard time seeing a 10-year-old allowing it. Or walking around snotty without caring. Or just in general talking and behaving the way Ciri does here.

To put things in perspective, 10 years old is one year younger than Harry Potter is in The Philosopher’s Stone, and two years younger than Meggie Folchart in Inkheart. The only way I can make ANY sort of sense of Ciri in this story, is by thinking that Geralt, being so old himself, has no concept of children's ages, and she's actually five or six.

Which would mean she's also being betrothed at five or six, but hey, Scandinavian Queen Margaret I was betrothed at age four, and I wouldn't put it past Calanthe. If she can sell her granddaughter at ten she can probably sell her at six too.

Story 6: Something More

Listen, I soaked up Geralt's injured hallucinations on the show, and the book is no different. Some of the dialogue with Visenna is exactly the same. I'm purring. The circumstances are different, but both versions work well. I like the way the transitions were done between reality, memory and dream, and the ending is very sweet. I have no complaints. :-)

[morallygreyprompts]

How did you get the confidence to post things online? I have always had a really hard time sharing what I've written with anyone, and I thought that making a tumblr where no one knows who I am would help. I nearly had a panic attack when I thought about just writing something to post. I'm just wondering if you've ever had anxiety about posting and what you did to help. Thanks

How indeed... I talk a lot on this, so to answer that basic question, my answer is this: I get anxious all the time, writing is something somehow weirdly... personal. It’s okay to be nervous. What do I do? If I am genuinely happy with what I’ve written, but I’m nervous about posting. I read it over- just once more to be sure, and then I hit that post button before I can stop myself.

Well, I guess I’ve always been a perfectionist and self-conscious with the things I do. As far as I’m concerned barely anything I do is good enough, my work simply to be perfect and outstanding and revolutionary- hell, why’d you think it’s taking me four years to write an (admittedly 160K) fanfic? But in a way, writing is the exception. Let me explain, maybe it’ll inspire you a little.

Writers are lucky. We’re different from artists, and musicians and chefs. Hell, we can be writing a deadly serious post about a hostage situation, write ‘and then a clown came out of nowhere and yanked his trousers down‘, delete the sentence, and not a living soul would know about it. We can make little errors without anyone ever knowing, we can make plot holes and fix them and delete entire chapters but people only ever see the finished result. I think sometimes people forget that. The process doesn’t matter to the reader, they don’t need to know a damned thing. 

That helps me- I can work with what I have, and no one needs to see it until I’m happy with it. It’s only then that you decide when others get to see it, and sometimes a little optimism goes a long way. I expected to write 3 or 4 posts, forget about this blog and disappear into the abyss, but people liked it, they liked my stuff, and honestly, I have never felt a greater feeling. Sappy, maybe, but dammit, it’s true. 

I’m proud of my work, and yeah, I’d say writing is my talent. But it doesn't matter how good you are, it doesn’t dull that incredible feeling when there, right in front of you, you just made a world, a scene, a whole story. You did that and other people are going to read it and enjoy it. For me, after a while, that feeling of things needing to be perfect? It just faded. You can make mistakes, and that doesn’t make your stuff bad or worthless. It just takes a while for that message to sink in I think. Writing is tough, anyone will tell you that. I’m self-conscious about my stuff, still am, and the occasional hater does hit me pretty hard. But you get back on the saddle, tell yourself you can do it, that that one person doesn’t matter- and they don’t. Writing is just something I have to do, I couldn’t have gotten through the last few years without it. I started off writing Sonic the Hedgehog Fanfic. Looking back, I wanna curl up and cry at its quality, but hey, it got me started and it got me over the fear of the first online publication while I still thought I was mint. So I got off topic but bear with me, this is important. You’ve never posted anything before? First off, write for yourself. Write what you want to read, not for the faceless audience on the other side of your screen. Post the paragraph you’re most proud of. Three sentences, something as simple as a few lines of dialogue. It might only get two likes in a month depending on how many people find it. Commenting on other writer’s work might help speed the process along though and it’ll help them too.

But hey, posting wasn’t so bad, was it? Then you can write a little more if you feel more confident. Just don’t get caught up on the numbers. Your writing is pretty much a whisper in a music concert if you’re just starting out, it’ll take time for people to find you, and two notes doesn’t mean you’re bad, and that’s the important thing to remember.

I think I’m finished with my pep talk, and self-conscious me is insisting it’s a mass of incoherent nonsense, but I am going to tell that person to shut up and post this anyway. I’ve covered what I need to, I think. The biggest lesson to take away is, by all means, start small, but just do it. Imagine what the worst that could happen is, how likely that is to happen. Then think realistically about the best thing that could happen. I hope somewhere amongst my rambles, you find something that will help you bite the bullet and just try.

“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.” Richard Bach

“If I waited for perfection, I would never write a word.” Margaret Atwood

[serendipitous-magic]

Director's Cut: Real Season 3, your take on the theater scene

(For the “give commentary on a scene you’ve written” thing)

OKAY SO I’M ACTUALLY REALLY GLAD YOU MENTIONED THAT SCENE BECAUSE THERE’S SOME VERY CLEVER FORESHADOWING IN THERE THAT I’M NOT SURE IF ANYONE CAUGHT. (Ahem.) I don’t think I’ll actually point it out, so that it can still be A Surprise, but just allow me to say that I am stupidly pleased with ~something~ in that section.

That being said, I’m interpreting “the theater scene” as like all the way through the theater scene, like from the movie starting to after Will’s episode, so (rubs hands together) here we go. Buckle up, kids. I’ll put it under a “read more” line and hope that works (Tumblr has been so weird about “read more” lines, has anyone else had that problem?)

-_-_-_-

Will ranks movies based on how easily they can make him forget the outside world. A score of one means, what movie? and a score of ten means, what real world? 

This one is an eight.

Will gets swept up in the story, delighted by the clocks and the Delorean and all the old-fashioned ‘50s stuff and Doc Brown’s exaggerated facial expressions - and captivated by Marty McFly’s skateboard, turned-up collar, guitar, and handsomely rumpled hair. He’s even able to mostly forget how crisp the air conditioning is, in here. The air smells like buttered popcorn; his tongue is probably stained red with artificial strawberry; and for the first time in a long day of hiking and racing across town, he’s sitting down in a comfy chair. A good end to a good day. 

It’s long been a headcanon of mine that Will gets a bit of a crush on Marty McFly when BTTF comes out in summer of 1985. I mean…

C’mon. He skateboards. He plays guitar. He’s clever (“Whoa, whoa, Biff… What’s that?”), he’s funny, he’s handsome, he’s cool and he knows it, he’s confident… Tell me Will wouldn’t be blushing in his theater seat. Go on.

His mood is dampened just a tad when he glances over and happens to see Mike’s fingers linked with El’s, as per the usual. 

“Whoa. Whoa, Doc, stuck here?” Marty says from the screen. “I can’t be stuck here, I got a life in 1985! I got a girl!” 

“Is she pretty?” 

“Ah, she’s beautiful.” 

Will looks back to the screen, because he doesn’t want to see the meaningful, affectionate glance that Mike sends his girlfriend. 

I just had fun kind of using the movie to bounce back and forth with what’s going on in Will’s head - like how Marty, in the movie, says, “Ah, she’s beautiful,” and Mike gives El this meaningful look and Will has to look away. That was just so much fun to write. I actually had this scene of BTTF pulled up in a different tab while I was writing this scene, to refer to, so I could get the dialogue right.

“She’s crazy about me. Look at this. Look what she wrote here, Doc, I mean, that says it all. Doc… You’re my only hope.”

Crazy about me.

Yeah, crazy -

“Crazy,” as related to being in love, has been somewhat of a motif through Stranger Things. We’ve got, of course, “Crazy together,” but also “Only love makes you that crazy, and that damn stupid,” and, “It makes you crazy,” etc. And I do believe I’ll be using that motif a bit, myself, in the rewrite. (Hueh hueh hueh.)

“Marty, I’m sorry. But the only power source capable of generating 1.21 gigawatts of electricity is a bolt of lightning.” 

At first Will thinks that the sudden darkness is part of the movie. And then, when the audience groans and he sees that even the exit signs above the doors have gone dark, he realizes what happened. 

“Aw, c’mon,” Lucas gripes from somewhere in the darkness.

There’s a general muttering and shuffling as the packed theater protests the blackout.

Spreading.

Where his hand rests on his thigh, Will’s fingers twitch.

It’s spreading.

The blackout.

This was kind of a half-callback to S2 where Will is trying to explain to Joyce and Hopper what he’s feeling/seeing with his Now Memories, and he says something like, “It’s growing, and spreading, and… killing.” 

Sweeping across Hawkins in a powerful, silent surge. He doesn’t know how he knows, but he does. He can feel it. Hot bulbs going dark; buzzing wires falling inert, lifeless.

Everything inside of Will drops. A horrible, sick, sinking, numb-cold swoop that starts to spiral somewhere in his gut, tingling up his spine and at the base of his skull, prickling at the back of his neck until one hand twitches up to press at the skin there.

It’s moving.

The knowledge comes to him unbidden, imparted to him with a sinuous, papery, reverberating flutter - like the sound of thousands of insect wings all beating at once, and Will wants to scream, he wants to bolt out of his chair, but he’s frozen.

His fingers are shaking. Something at the pit of his throat is shaking. His whole body feels like it’s sinking through the floor, leaving itself behind, his limbs going cold and weak as if he’s about to faint. His head swims.

I wanted to be as physical as possible with the descriptions of how the Mind Flayer feels. That little bit of dialogue we got from Will in that-one-season-that-never-happened actually gave some nice details: how it feels like dropping on a roller coaster, but cold. 

Sluggishly, as if in a dream, he drags his hand off of his neck and gropes for the seat next to him. His mouth is already forming the M, voice ready to croak out one single syllable, when his fingers rake through thin, cold air.

His first instinct is to turn to Mike. ‘Nuff said.

There’s no one in the seat beside him. There’s no one in the whole theater. The air-conditioned, popcorn-scented air has gone frigid and sour, and Will is on his feet. Turning in circles. Scanning the dilapidated space wildly, shoes fumbling and slipping over slick, fleshy vines. 

No.

No, no, no, no, no no no -

His eyes haven’t adjusted to the dark, but the blueish gray palette of shadows is so horribly, cruelly familiar. And the fluttering - that dry, hissing, grinding flutter seems to spike through his whole body, shooting through him from neck to fingertips to toes, making him grimace, driving his feet forwards in a panicked, instinctual stumble towards the door. 

It’s not real.

He tells himself that as he shoulders open the swinging door, coughs into his hands at the sting of toxins in his lungs. The coughing is as sharp as gunshots in the dead silence, echoing harshly through the darkness as he propels himself through the theater lobby. Spores drift listlessly in the stale air, bringing back a thousand memories, a thousand deeply ingrained instincts to run and hide and -

It’s not real. I’m not here. Not really.

He’s twelve years old again. Cold and alone and scared, the soles of his sneakers skidding on sludge. Jerking away with a half-swallowed sob as a fringe of dangling vines comb over his cheek.

Okay so Will is stuck between two conflicting reactions right now: a) instinctual, trauma-driven mortal terror, and b) complete denial. At this point in the story, he’s gonna be doing everything he can to convince himself that this isn’t real, it’s not really happening, it’s just a flashback, he’s just seeing things. But at the same time, being abruptly thrown back into the UD for the first time in sixth months is triggering a whole nasty slew of panic responses.

The lobby opens up into the mall, and Will comes to a halt. Starcourt is hollow. Storefronts devoid of products, of people. A few lights waver to life here and there as he passes, faint and blue-tinted, their meager glow smothered under softly rustling tendrils. He’s acclimating to the silence, the quiet pressing in against his eardrums like a high air pressure, and now his ears are picking up on the barely-detectable whispers and chitters of the Upside Down. The sound of vines growing, moving, shifting. The sound of creatures skittering into the shadows, somewhere unseen.

Like Dart, something in the back of his mind whispers. 

The back of his throat opens, a call for Mike rising instinctually, but he bites down on it before it reaches his lips. He shakes his head, hard. Like he’s trying to wake himself up after nearly nodding off in class. He’s not a little kid anymore. It’s not real. It can’t be real. The Gate is closed. Nothing has happened since November. It’s just in his head. He can snap himself out of it.

And here’s that tilt towards the denial end of the spectrum.

His eyes squeeze shut. He clenches his fists at his sides, splays out his fingers until the tendons ache, breathes five long breaths. His throat scratches with the cold, acrid air, but he forces himself to breathe smoothly. The chittering grows louder, darting past him, coming close enough that he can feel something brush past his shoelace. But it’s not real. He won’t cringe away. He won’t let these memories control him. He won’t. 

When he opens his eyes, he’s still there.

His skin crawls. His eyes trace up, over the shadowy silhouettes of the food court, over the vine-choked space above, past the neon STARCOURT sign that gutters and flares in sporadic bursts. And beyond the great glass skylight, there’s a shape. Dark - dark as the void of space, like a hole cut out of the universe. Looking at him. Watching him. The numb-cold swoop drains through him again, stronger this time as the Mind Flayer’s featureless head lowers towards the skylight.

A broken whimper twists in Will’s chest. Fear takes over. His mind goes blank, body reacting on animal instinct as his feet shove him back, away -

Aaaand we’ve tilted back in the direction of panic and terror. Whoo.

No -

No, please -

Hey do y’all remember how when they started burning the tunnels in S2, if you listened closely, Will said something garbled that sounded like “No, please -!”?

Pepperidge Farm remembers.

Lights flare at random, strobing, flickering across the length of the mall, static popping in Will’s clothes, and oh god he sees him, he knows Will is here, he’s looking at him -

Will can feel him beckoning. Calling to him. He’s getting closer, pressing down towards the glass, and Will can hear the whooshing, rumbling roar, muffled through the roof, and he’s still backing up, back into the theater lobby, lungs pistoning behind his ribs - Go away! Go away! Go - dread and powerlessness and panic cutting through him in sharp, icy waves, and not again, please not again, it’s not real it’s not real it’s not real, please please -

An abrupt grip on his upper arm makes him sputter, his scream getting tangled up in his mouth before it can come out, and Mike’s dark eyes go even wider with worry.

Mike.

Here I was going for the effect that they do in the show when Will suddenly snaps out of his episode and is back in the real world - yanno, where it’s all blue and gray and cold looking, in the Upside Down, and then all at once bam in the next shot the color scheme shifts and there’s Mike and he’s back in the real world?

Mike’s oh-so-familiar features, lit by the warm gold-and-pink glow of the lobby displays. The smell of buttered popcorn. A curious glance or two from the people milling around, who doubtless just witnessed Will’s erratic flight. 

Relief swells so abruptly in Will’s chest that it bubbles up over his lips as a watery laugh. 

Not real.

His head whips up, scanning the skylights that are just visible beyond the overhang of the second level. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. He’s not there. Will’s heart is wobbling hard between his lungs, adrenaline pounding at his temples and fingertips, and his -

His shoes. They’re wet. The soles slimy with the residue of… of…

Soda. He must have stepped in some soda. Yes - yes, there. There’s a banana-yellow caution, wet floor! sign propped up a few yards away. He just stepped in something as he crossed the lobby, that’s all. He breathes hard, consciously slowing the push-pull of his diaphragm, clearing out the phantom chill from his lungs.

He registers all at once that Mike has been saying his name. Will focuses in on the face of his best friend - the tapered cheeks, nearly devoid of the baby fat that used to round them out. The smattering of freckles over his sunburnt nose. The dark half-curling waves falling over his forehead, one strand just barely brushing the eyelashes of his left eye. He’s staring down into Will’s face with an expression of alarm, and when their eyes meet, he repeats, “Are you okay?”

Hmm. Watcha lookin’ at, Will?

Deja vu is making Mike’s head spin. It’s a sick, sinking feeling, like realizing all at once that you’ve forgotten something important. Like thinking that there’s one more stair than there is, and stepping into empty space with a disorienting jolt. Because Mike has seen Will like this before.

Will is gasping for breath, his body trembling under Mike’s palm, his eyes wild. The skin of his arm is chilled from the air conditioning, peppered with goosebumps.

Itty bitty detail, but: Mike assumes that Will’s skin is cold from air conditioning, and not… you know… the Upside Down perhaps?

“Will? Are you okay?”

But Will doesn’t seem to hear him. His chin is tilted up, eyes flickering over the ceiling like he expects to find something there.

“Will?”

His breath begins to even out. His head turns, scanning the lobby of the movie theater. 

“Will?”

Finally, Mike’s voice seems to filter through whatever haze is surrounding him, and hazel eyes meet Mike’s.

“Are you okay?”

Something strange happens then. As he looks over Mike’s face, Will’s eyes lower for a moment, like he’s glancing at Mike’s mouth. And for a fraction of a second, it sets off an automatic response in the back of Mike’s brain. He shuts down the impulse as soon as it rears its head, but it was there: for a split second, Mike was about to tilt forward and… Well, no, not really. Of course he didn’t really think about kissing Will. It’s just that he’s been with El all day, so he’s still in boyfriend mode. It was automatic. 

Still, the impulse startles him enough that he drops his hand from Will’s arm as Will opens his mouth to answer.

And here we have some Repressed Internalized Homophobia! Because of course Mike only thought about kissing Will because he’s been with El all day, and of course he only dropped his hand because it surprised him, and not because he’s subconsciously shying away from anything too “gay.”

“Yeah,” Will mumbles. “I’m… yeah. Fine.”

Mike can’t help it. He pushes. “Are you sure?”

He’s expecting Will to be mad at him. To roll his eyes or snap a retort or turn away, because he hates when people fuss over him, and Mike knows he hates it. But instead, Will just looks back out at the mall for a moment. He’s rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. This must have been a bad one.

“‘f course,” Will mutters eventually. He scuffs one foot along the carpet, like he’s trying to wipe something off his shoe.

It was the blackout that must have done it. Will’s panic attacks sometimes come on with no obvious rhyme or reason, but when there is a trigger - say, for example, abrupt, total darkness - they can be twice as bad. He seems better now, though. Calmer. More grounded. Mike decides against throwing an arm around Will’s shoulders, in case he gets shoved off with an annoyed bark of, I’m fine, but he risks an elbow bump.

Again: this is the first “episode,” so I needed to establish a few background details about what’s been going on in Hawkins and in the Party, in the six months since we saw them in S2. And basically what we’re learning here is that Will has been less and less cool with people fussing over him and being worried about him. We saw that starting to happen in S2, and it must have gotten so much worse after that. Remember his speech to Jonathan? How everyone treats him like he’s gonna break, like he can’t handle things on his own? And then the Mind Flayer happened. Every time Will coughed or disappeared to the bathroom for three minutes, people would have been going nuts. And it probably drives Will up the wall. To the point where he’d start to snap at them. To the point where Mike goes to do The Arm Thing, but decides against it at the last second and aborts the movement and only kind of awkwardly bumps Will’s elbow with his, because he wants to comfort Will but doesn’t wanna get snapped at, and he knows Will hates that stuff. So there’s a little bit of a wedge between them, right now (well, another wedge, since there’s already the stuff going on with Mike ignoring the Party a bit for El).

“C’mon,” he coaxes, “They’re about to get the movie running again.”

Will turns at Mike’s nudge without complaint, and they fall into step side-by-side as they make their way back to their seats. The Party greets them with anxious stares and whispers of, “Is he okay?” and “What happened?” Will waves off their concern, putting on a mask of nonchalance, and tosses off a line about fresh air.

One of my favorite HCs (and honestly it’s basically just canon) is how Mike and Will just automatically fall into step with each other as they walk, since they’ve been attached at the hip since they were five years old. They’re so used to navigating the world at each other’s side, quite literally, that it’s a deeply ingrained habit to just sync up their steps, despite the difference of leg lengths haha. 

Also: the Party being concerned makes Will’s walls come up, and he “puts on a mask of nonchalance and tosses off a line about fresh air,” so we can see that he’s plenty used to pretending that everything is fine in order to wave off people’s concerns. 

Before they can question him further, the film reel sputters, and the movie kicks into gear again.

“A bolt of lightning!” Doc Brown exclaims. The audience cheers as the film resumes. Will sticks a twizzler in his mouth and Mike makes himself look at the screen. “Unfortunately, you never know when or where it’s ever gonna strike!” 

Marty slaps the Save the Clock Tower! flyer and thrusts it at the mad scientist, suave and handsome in his denim jacket with its popped-up collar.

“We do now.” 

Mike thinks Marty is handsome too. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also, can I just point out that Mike was watching Will eat a twizzler and made himself look away. Liiiitle tiny hints of Mike subconsciously repressing his attraction to Will there. ‘Cause… uh, Mike? Why are you staring at Will’s mouth?

-_-_-_-

Aaaaaand there we have it! You probably didn’t mean that whole thing, but… Sorry not sorry lol. I’ve been accused of not knowing how to make a short post, and those accusations are 100% accurate.

[ciucalata]

Oh dear Ciuucalata (I'd like to call you Elena or Ellie but I'm not sure you are comfortable with strangers doing so) won't you divulged the sacred knowledge of how to write a fic and be able to finish it?

Ooh dw i love it when people call me by my name, or ellie, but ciuucalata is okay too i don’t mind!!

Finishing fics is really hard, my dude. And i say this as i look at my 18 wips, some of which will never be finished unfortunately. Maybe I am not the best person to answer this but I will try to help however i can. At least you will learn fron my mistakes and know what not to do lmao

First, i think it’s important to focus on one project at a time. This is mainly my biggest problem, i start a fic and somehow along the way i get an idea for another fic. I start the new fic, then i get a new idea and so on. One project at a time is a totally reachable goal. If you get a new idea, just write down the main things you already have for it so you don’t lose it and you can return to it once your current project is finished. Of course, this depends from one person to another, some people work better when they have more than one work in progress, but I do think it’s important to not have too many. Two of three are an okay number, but more than that can be overwhelming, in my opinion.

Second, try writing the parts you are excited for, whether they are in cronological order or not (or in a different chapter if we’re talking about a multichap). Write down every bit of dialogue or narration or description that come to your mind. Write outlines if that is your thing, write only the dialogue to keep it flowing, write whatever you want first be it the beginning, some random part in the middle or the end. That’s the beauty of writing: it has no set rules and you can do whatever you want. Unfortunately, once you have those parts down, there is still the hard bit where you have to go back and write the in-between parts to connect them. But just keep in mind that once you have those finished, your fic will be ready too. And wow, isn’t that amazing??

Third, if you don’t know how to start it, don’t just stare at the blank document. I know how hella frustrating that can be and trust me, it doesn’t help anyone no matter how hard you glare at it. Instead, before you open the doc, try to imagine the first scene and then translate it into words in your mind. I found that this helps me a lot and once i have the first sentence, or at least a few words in mind for the beginning, the rest just come on their own. I once wrote more than 1k in a sitting like this.

Fourth, I think it’s really important to keep being excited about your wip. Personally, i like talking with my friends about it or share parts with them so they can read it and then we can just start screaming about it (man i love my friends they’re too good for me @friends i love and appreciate u guys thanks for being in my life even if i suck sometimes). If you don’t like sharing your writing before it’s done, then just ask them if they can help you brainstorm for the fic. Two(or more) heads at work are better than one.

Fifth, and the most important i think, don’t beat yourself over the fic if you reach a part that’s blocking you. Accept that sometimes that can happen, no one is a writing machine, and let it be for a while. Maybe try writing a little for another wip if you have more inspiration for it, or just take a break from writing, they’re honestly the best thing ever. It helps a lot, trust me. While writing a lot and being in the zone is an amazing feeling and you wanna keep going no matter what, breaks can be just as great and helpful. Live your life a little, socialize with friends/family, go to a coffeeshop and treat yourself to your favorite thing there bc you deserve it damn it, or read a book. Reading helps you with your writing, too. Whatever you do, enjoy yourself (and yeah, you can keep thinking about your writing if you want, but no negativity here!! I will personally materialize wherever you are and beat that negativity for you with love ofc) and you’ll find that when you go back to writing after the break, however long or short it is, the words come easier or you’ll realize why you couldn’t get past that scene. Oh, and about this, I remember once reading a post here somewhere on tumblr that if you’re stumped with your writing, the problem is 10 sentences before (and damn that’s hella true i can guarantee you that).

Sixth(god this is already so long i’m sorry), don’t be afraid to delete stuff, even if it’s a super long part or something that you really like. Sacrifices must be made so that you can keep moving forward. It’s hard, i know, and it will break your heart a little everytime bc all the words you write are important to you, but you have to kill them(joking just save them in a different doc bc who knows? maybe you’ll need them later or for something else). Sometimes you have to take a step backwards so that you can keep going.

And lastly, but not least, have fun!!!! Write stuff you want to read about, write stuff that only you care about(although the internet is such a big place there will be a lot of people who care about the same stuff you care about), write that au that has been already written for thousand of times (there’s a reason it’s such a popular au after all). Just love what you do and create, and don’t forget to take breaks when you think it’s too much. Also it’s normal to have negative thoughts about your writing, we all have them, just don’t let them control you. Talk to someone about it and you’ll feel a lot better both about yourself and your writing. Oh, and take your time!! We all have different writing speeds (and while comparing yourself with other writers is inevitable, don’t dwell too much on it, you are you, they are they and we’re all just doing our best here) so don’t rush things. The fandom you’re writing for will still be there when you’re done and you’ll still have people who will read your writing.

I’m sure i’ll come up with more stuff after i post this, but it’s already too long so i’ll stop here. I really really hope this helped you in some way, and hey if you need some cheerleading along the way, I’m here for ya 💕