#Book 1 of 2

[heavy-eyez]

Chapter 28: A Twist of Fate

*Investigation Day*

Stardust Ranch, Buckeye, Arizona.

I don't know how I ended up in such a peaceful looking area. There is nothing strange about it from the van. As soon as I step out of the van and onto the dirt, I feel a buzz.

"You okay?" Zak asks coming out behind me

"This place..."

"I know right? It's crazy. Dave said that it was insane, a true lucky find."

"No it's... buzzing." I say

He turns to me

"What do you mean?" He asks

"I can feel the electricity from here. It's... powerful." I say

"You think you can handle it? You can stay in the RV, I don't have a problem with that."

"I'll be fine. It's... not terrible." I say walking further down the dirt path.

"Okay. Do you want to take a walk around the property while we conduct the interview?" Zak asks

"Can I? Is that okay?" I ask

"Yeah. Do what you need, hun. Before you go though, come meet Dave Schrader. He's our researcher." Zak says

I follow him to meet the bald man standing near a church.

"Dave, What's up man. This is Faith, my daughter." Zak says

I turn to look at the cameras briefly before giving Dave a small wave.

"Hi, Faith. Nice to meet you. Zak has told me so much about you." Dave says holding out his hand for me to shake

I just look at it.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Schrader." I say politely, not shaking his hand

"She doesn't do any kind of physical greeting." Zak explains

"Oh. No worries!" Dave says

I take a few steps back to avoid being in the shots and stare out into the distance while the men talk. I can hear Zak getting excited about something but I don't pay it much concern, instead, turning my focus to the dirt under the boots Zak insisted I wear. He said that I needed them for grip in case we go hiking in the mountain. I haven't done much hiking but I didn't protest.

The buzz isn't terrible now that I've gotten used to being on it. It's not like a normal buzz that you hear when the lights are on. It's a feeling in my bones, like they're actually vibrating. It's a weird feeling that I can only compare to standing on a speaker playing on full blast.

Zak and Dave talk for a little before they start wrapping up and getting things back in the RV.

"Dave is gonna follow us to the ranch and we will go from there, okay?"

I nod and get into the bus.

It's about a two minute drive from the church to the corner where the ranch is and another three minutes to make it to the actual entrance of the ranch. There's a horse in one of the front pens by the sign. It's white and looks older. The house is further inside the fence. The guys park out front and start getting their camera's ready. Dave is already talking to the man inside the house. He's a thinner man with thin, metal rimmed glasses in his face. Dave waves to Zak and the guys in the van and Zak gives a thumbs up before jogging over. They talk for a little while and Zak jogs back to tell the guys where to set up the cameras and such. He pops his head into the RV and scans the small living area for me.

"Hey, you wanna take a walk around the place? We're gonna get started on the interviews and then shoot some B-roll before heading to our next interview. You're more than welcome to stay in the RV if you want though." Zak says

"I'll head out once you guys are inside. I don't want to be in the way." I say.

"No problem.... You sure you'll be okay?" He asks

"Yeah... Why?" I ask, sensing some unease in his voice

"I just.... I feel like we don't spend enough time together and you really need someone to just support you, someone more stable. I can cut back in filming for a while, if you want! We can go on vacation together! Anywhere you want!" He offers

"Zak, I promise, you're doing great. Don't change anything about your filming schedule just for me. We can go on vacation after we finish filming here." I say "Plus, I have Whiskey to keep me company while you guys film."

Zak looks at me and then to Whiskey, who's asleep on the floor next to me.

"Okay, kiddo. As long as you're certain." He says with a small smile.

He leaves the RV and I watch as he switches to 'Work-Zak' mode. They all move like a well oiled machine. I make up dialogue for them as they talk, it makes me laugh and keeps me entertained. I end up taking a little nap on the bed above the drivers seat to pass the time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Several hours later*

I stand outside wearing my thick winter coat. It's colder in the desert at night than it is in Oregon on a normal day. I'm waiting for Zak to let me into the house. The buzzing in the ground is more intense closer to the house, I can feel it in my legs and teeth. Like I'm standing inside fluorescent lights. My teeth start to chatter as the door opens.

"Sorry, kid. We had to adjust the cameras. They're still filming, but we're gonna have you sit in the kitchen and take notes on what you feel, see, et cetera." Zak explains, practically dragging me into the slightly warmer house.

He leads me to the kitchen, where I sit down at one of the chairs around the table. They recently let Ashley, Jay's wife, out of the house to go back to the RV. I passed her on the way in. Zak continues the investigation with Jay as I sit with a little headlamp on my head, writing down what I am feeling inside the house and or what I can see, which is nothing but the occasional shadow figure. I sit there for about thirty minutes just writing and in the zone.

All of the sudden, I get the urge to get up and go outside. Notepad in hand, I stand up quietly and head towards the front door, opening it and closing it behind me. I can see Whiskey looking at me from the window of the RV, but I don't head over to her. Instead I follow my gut and wander out into the far pasture. It's fenced off and empty, obviously not used for anything except maybe stretching the horses legs.

I climb under the fence and wander right to the middle. I feel.... Calm? There's no buzzing underneath my feet. I can feel... something... above my head. I wave my hand over my head, watching for some sort of reaction. Nothing happens. My hand just feels cold. I keep staring into the sky. My hands shake as they scribble on the page. Page after page, I feel like I'm in a trance.

I can't tear my eyes away from the sky.

I can see lights flickering in the distance.

Are they the mothership I head Zak talking about with Dave earlier?

Am I going to get abducted?

The notepad and pen falls from my hands as the sense of calm washes over me again.

I reach up, wanting to be closer to it. I can feel a warm light shining over me, but the sky above is dark and full of stars.

I can hear someone calling to me.

Screaming my name.

I just want to be taken into the warm embrace of this light. There's no suffering or malice to it. I just want to be held, like my mother used to hold me.

A low, demonic growl rips through the silence. My blood runs cold. Something else is here with me. I don't know any prayers, but I have a rosary, given to me by a priest, around my neck. I can't move my arms down to grab it. I can't feel my legs anymore, either. I feel cold, even with the jacket. Suddenly, I'm burning up. Hot, putrid air swirls around me and I choke. I can't breathe!

I can't breathe!

Something plows into me from the side, knocking me off my feet. I land in the buzzing dirt, shivering and twitching uncontrollably. I can't control this, I need to get a fucking grip!

I hear Whiskey snarling and barking. This isn't her normal bark though. This is her protective bark. It comes from deep within her chest and she's standing in front of me in a defensive position. Her ears are back, sticking straight out behind her.

"What.... Where did you? Whiskey!" I stammer as I reach for her short lead, which is attached to her service dog harness.

She snarls and whips around as I try to grab hold of her. She snaps at the air and barks. The demonic growl rips through the air again. Whiskey stills and bares her teeth as she lunges towards something behind me. She jumps right over my head and a high pitched screeching sound pierces through my head. I cover my ears and cry out in pain. The buzzing in the ground stops.

Everything goes quiet. I grab hold of Whiskey's leash. She stopped barking, but is still growling gently. Jay, sweating, panting, and dirty, suddenly appears out of nowhere.

"Faith.... *huff* What.. are... *huff, huff* you doing?" He asks, bracing himself on his knees.

"I... I don't know. Why are you dirty?" I ask

"I was trying to get a hold of Whiskey, she slipped out of my grasp and I ate shit on the dirt." he says sitting down on the floor with me.

"Did you see what happened?" I ask after a minute.

"I just saw you standing here, arms in the air, looking up. I could.... I don't know, I could feel that you had something negative surrounding you but Whiskey distracted me by barking and opening the door to the RV." He says "Are you okay? Did you eel anything enter you? Like... possess you?"

"I didn't feeel anything like that. I just felt it around me, but I have this," I pull the rosary out from under my shirt "so I think that's why I wasn't affected too much. Other than that... it got really hot and I heard something... growl." I say

"Well... you aren't being affected. I can tell that much. I'm just glad Whiskey had some sense and reacted fast enough to get to you. Even if I tried to stop her." Jay says

He takes a deep breath before getting up and holding out his hand. i take it and he helps me up.

"Let's go back to the RV, Zak has been looking for you for about thirty minutes."

"THIRTY MINUTES?!" I screech as I put the notepad and pen in my jacket pocket.

"Yeah. How long did you think it was?" Jay asks

"I thought it was like five minutes! I swear I couldn't have been gone for longer than that." I say, feeling my face pale

"I'm kidding! It was like five minutes before he realized you weren't in the house, another five to look around and then two minutes to call me and check to see if I'd seen you. So like fifteen-ish minutes. Not too bad, I had my eye on you the whole time." Jay says gently shoving me with his elbow.

I shove him with both my hands as he laughs. He always tries to make bad situations better with me. We make it back to the RV and I climb up to the bed above the drivers seat so I can get some sleep. I sleep in the thick winter coat, still freezing despite it being warmer in the RV that it is outside. Whiskey sleeps on the floor underneath my bunk and Jay finishes the investigation with Zak and the others.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*three weeks later*

After the investigation, Zak and I went to the doctors to get my blood work done. He got the appointments mixed up and only realized when the doctors office called him to confirm my appointment the day before. It threw our entire schedule off, but after two weeks, we got the results in the mail. Nancy came over to watch us open it, and we're all sitting at the kitchen island, staring at the letter.

"Well.. Are you guys going to open it?" She asks

"Ummm....." Zak says

"Mmmm..." I reply

"Good lord." She says "I'll open it."

Nancy tears into the thick envelope. She unfolds all the papers and starts reading quietly.

"You're allergic to grass, don't roll around in it. You also have asthma and they prescribed you an inhaler. Don't know how.... Oh they did a breathing test. Let's see.... Hmmm.... No other major allergies, just dust and grass it looks like. No genetic diseases either... let's see..." Nancy says

She flips through the pages until she reaches something that makes her eyes go wide.

"Family history!" She says excitedly

"They found your brother obviously... hm... odd... oh.. your mom is listed here, but your biological father isn't..." She trails "Oh dear."

"What?! What is it?!" I ask worried

"Um... I don't know how to say this... uhh..."

"Spit it out mom!" Zak says

"She's... She's..."

Zak snatched the packet from her hands while apologizing for it. He reads the page while I stare on.

"What does it say?" I ask

His face goes pale and he looks up to his mom. I look at the both of them.

"What?!" I ask "Oh god, am I gonna die?!"

Zak just hands me the paper and covers his mouth with his hands.

I start reading, "The alleged father cannot be excluded as the biological father of the tested child. The probability of paternity is 99.99%, assuming a prior probability of 50%... what does that mean?"

"It.... It means that Zak is... your biological father." Nancy says quietly.

"Zak..... is my dad?"

[elucubrare]

there's this horrible school of attempted literary criticism on here that holds that 1. everything in any given author's work is autobiographical, especially if it seems "real" and 2. those themes seeped into the work subconsciously, revealing something about the author that they're either trying to hide or unaware of themself. it drives me up a wall, since it seems to deny the fundamental skills that make people good writers: the empathy to imagine and portray experiences that one hasn't had oneself and the ability to take one's personal emotional experiences or worldview and fold them, consciously, into the unworked clay of a narrative.

[pineapple-frenzy]

Book 2 au with Zuko and Katara Lee and Huamei

Katara is separated from her friends, and so she's left to travel the earth kingdom on her own. She stumbles across Zuko, who is similarly travelling on his own. They decide that pairing up and travelling together would be best

[almondcroissantsandink]

they slayed at the sake of my sanity i'm afraid

[toooceanblue]

Thinking about how in Gideon's narration she employs 206 anatomical names for bones but Harrow doesn't know the difference between a hilt and a pommel. Something something cavaliers being expected to respect/understand/integrate into necromancy while necromancers are not expected to do the same for caveliership. Is this anything.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

The Murderbot TV show is finally here!

[starlingfawn]

through starless sky to blackest ground

[marivanilla05]

In the middle of exams so here are just some higher quality versions of my last sketches!

(There will be no context for Menelaus dressed as a seal and Helen doing drugs. If you know, you know.)

[fern--theplant]

originally it was gonna say fujoshi instead but this is funnier to me

[unearthedheart]

will is so fucking intelligent its actually insane. i never realized that he suspected seizure after his first case of sleep walking. immediately after that he's in hannibal kitchen theorizing about physical disease. its so heart breaking to see the way he feels so sure of the problem from the start but lacks the confidence to take action when his support system doesn't see eye to eye with him. how many times in his life has he known something with aching clarity, only to be denied by those around him that doubt, dislike, or infantilize him? 

[heavy-eyez]

Chapter 27: Life Sure Is Funny/ 'Swimming Lessons'

It's been three months since Kade came to my house and told me everything he knew. He'd been looking for me since he was put in the foster care system. He even got himself sent back several times just to make sure that he would be there in case I showed up, and when I did, he got scared. He couldn't tell me the truth so he shut me out of his life, watching from afar, even though he really wanted to tell me everything. He told me that he missed me and that he was sorry that he wasn't a better brother for me and he wanted to be there for me.

Zak and Jay naturally, had a lot of questions for him. Mostly how did he know, how come he never told anyone and how come he chose to get aged out of the system rather than get adopted by Zak. Kade explained that he was a little intimidated by Zak and the guys at first. Turns out he's a little shy and timid like me! But unlike me, he won't talk to anyone unless absolutely necessary. Kade had filed for citizenship in Las Vegas over a month before he arrived and it was approved the week I was off for spring break. Which is why he was trying to contact me. He was trying to connect after all these years. He also got a job and since he was 18, he was contacted by one of our families lawyers giving him access to all the money left for him in the will our parents set up for us. He was given specific instructions not to go use the money on frivolous things like cars or whatever. He instead used it to rent a small apartment nearby and start college classes at LVU. He also got a job.

In the three months following his arrival, I talked to Jay a lot about my feelings, Jay then had to leave, Kade dropped me off at school several times, met my friends, met a girl he sort of likes at school, come over for dinner several times a week, and told me all sorts of stories from when we were little. It's brought up a lot of memories for me, things I couldn't remember. I learned that I never listened to my father's directions, refused to take sophistication classes, and even wore boys clothes to upset my father. With help from my mother I was able to be tamed, but still a wild child. Always running around and being silly. He said that father eventually just gave up on me and would laugh every time I did something I wasn't supposed to be doing.

I learned a lot about old family memories and that we went on a lot of trips. Kade also remembered Zak. He remembered him being present in his life very early on but nothing really stood out to him. I learned a lot about what my parents did for work. What I thought was just a graphic design company was actually several hotels, household products, and of course, the graphic design company they used for making advertisements and such for other companies. We did live in a big house and that was sold for something more family friendly once I was born, as was most of our expensive furniture. We lived in that house until their death ten years later. Kade was 13 and I was ten. I remember more from that time in life but it's all pretty fuzzy still. Kade never lived with our aunt and uncle. He was shipped off to foster care once our parents died because he caught our uncle trying to steal money from our trusts and was going to tell the police. He did tell them, but they didn't believe him. Thankfully our uncle never got away with getting the money, but he got away with some other nasty stuff that I didn't think Kade needed to know about. Dakota and I started dating too. It was a very slow start. He had asked me out on a couple dates, and eventually just asked Zak if he could be my boyfriend. Zak, thankfully, wasn't too hard on him and said that while he doesn't agree with me dating so young, he couldn't stop me from accepting his offer. The relationship has been good so far, Dakota takes me out on little dates every weekend to see things I've never experienced before. Like the Las Vegas Strip, I got to take a lot of pictures of the people and the places. Next weekend, we're going to Henderson.

That brings us to now. Summer break. It's the end of June, almost July and it's HOT. Zak comes to find me in the air conditioned living room to tell me that he's going on an investigation soon and he wants me to go with him. I ended up telling him about my apparent psychic abilities and that I wanted to help him with communicating to spirits. My only condition in that I wasn't to be filmed at all. I already get stopped on the street enough by true crime junkies looking to get details about my kidnapping and torture. It was hard enough to go to school as it was because kids there just wanted to know out of curiosity. I know they mean well and most are truly just curious but I'm not in a place to talk about something that happened so recently and asking about it isn't going to push me to do so.

"Okay, well we can get you on the show with us and not have you be filmed. I know you want to keep some sense of privacy and anonymity. I haven't even made an official statement saying I've adopted you. Maybe sometime later this year we can make an official announcement. Does that sound good?" Zak asks

"Don't know how we got there, but sure. Whatever floats your boat." I say

"Oh! Before I forget. You have a doctor's appointment in July and you start therapy in a week. You're probably going to get bloodwork done so is there anything you want to do regarding that? Genetic testing for diseases, DNA to find any other family members? Anything of the sort? I just want to make sure you cover any bases you want covered." He says

I can feel my blood run cold at the mention of the doctor's appointment, but I take a deep breath and nod.

"Um... I want to know about my family health history. And I want DNA testing. Just for fun I guess. I know Kade and I are related but I wonder if I have any other family we don't know about. Or diseases we could inherit, you know? Could you stay with me during the appointment?" I ask

"Okay. Yeah I can stay with you during the appointment." He says

"Alright well I'll get the paperwork for the show and I'll help you fill it out. Then you'll be ready to join the show. Your name will only be mentioned in the credits unless you don't want any royalties from it at all." Zak says

I stay silent trying to figure out what royalties are.

"What's a royalties?" I ask

"Um... It's money. Like.. how do I explain it. You get paid to work on the show right? Well, the channel it plays on pays you to be on the show or in a movie let's say. They usually pay you a certain amount of money to use your footage on TV for other people to watch."

I'm more confused than when I first asked the question.

"Explain like I'm five."

"You make a movie or show. Big companies pay you money to put on TV."

"Oh. Okay. Don't I get paid like a regular job though?" I ask

"Do you need me to explain that like your five?" Zak asks

"Yes."

"Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Depends on your contract. You will have regular job pay money because it's my show and I can do that."

"Okay. And you're okay with that? Like... it won't be a problem that I'm making money from your show?" I ask

"Of course it's okay. I want you to start making money, it's something you'll have to learn eventually." He says

I just nod and then sit up.

"I wanna go for a swim." I say making my way to my bedroom

"But you don't know how to swim!" Zak calls after me

"I'll figure it out!" I call back

~~~~~~~~

*Three days later, at Dakota's house*

I'm sitting in Dakota's living room, waiting for Zak to come pick me up after his meeting with his job. He taught me how to play a video game that involves killing zombies. For some reason this one doesn't trigger my PTSD like the other version does. I mean, it's fake characters and 'bots' (I don't know what those are but Dakota explained that they're like fake people) but I can't stand the thought of shooting a fake gun at a fake person in a video game.

Dakota says I'm really good at this version of the game. So far, I've been sitting here for a couple of hours and have only died once from a zombie attack. I'm just starting a new level when Dakota comes in from the backyard with his friend Tanner. They had just gone swimming in their pool. I was going to join them but I went 'swimming' at home three days ago Zak sat outside while I floated around the shallow end in a unicorn pool float. He has a picture of me in my swim suit and sunglasses with sunscreen lathered on my face and neck. I wasn't going to risk having to be watched like a hawk by Dakota and his friend while I'm learning to swim. We leave for Zak's investigation in about a week, I'm nervous. Dakota will be coming with us for this one apparently. But since he's 18, he's going to work, not just because.

Tanner and Dakota joke around in the kitchen before turning their attention to me.

"Faith. You missed a great pool session, the water feels great and I totally beat Dakota in water basketball!" Tanner says

"Cool." I say flatly

I still haven't warmed up to Tanner too much. Nothing personal, he's just high energy and I get anxious when he's around. I never know what to talk about with him.

"Do you know how to swim? You should totally join us next time! I'll even invite my sister to play!" Dakota adds.

I focus on the game as they both plop themselves on the floor. They wreak of chlorine and sunscreen. I don't answer them.

"Faith?" Dakota asks

"Mhm?"

"Do you know how to swim?"

I look to Tanner, who's beside Dakota.

"No." I say looking back at the screen.

Dakota takes the controller from me and pauses the game.

"Hey!" I shout

"You seriously don't know how to swim?" He asks

"No, I don't! What does it matter?!" I say angrily

Why is he pressing the issue? It's frustrating me, but when his hazel eyes look at me pleadingly, I have to forgive him. I shouldn't forgive him. Everything about him draws me in, I want to kiss him. He is my boyfriend after all, I should be able to trust him with anything.

Except this.

I chew my lip. He can't know about this, he shouldn't have to know about this. No one except my therapist should know.

"Do you want to learn?" He asks softly

I roll my eyes.

"No." I grumble "Can I have the controller back?"

He hands it back to me after a minute and I go back to playing his game. Five minutes of blissful silence later, Tanner loudly announces he's going to take a shower and gets up. Dakota gets up and sits on the couch next to me.

"I know you sent him away." I say not taking my focus off the game

"I did no such thing." He retorts

"Whatever."

"Do you really not know how to swim?" he asks

"No I don't." I huff.

"Why haven't you learned?"

"Because I don't fucking feel like it." I snap

"Don't cuss at me." Dakota says in a stern voice

"Who are you to tell me what to do?"

It comes out harsher than I meant it. I briefly turn to look at him before going back to my game. I feel bad for starting a fight with him over learning how to swim, it's a dumb reason to fight.

"Where is this attitude coming from? I'm just trying to ask you a question and offer some help." Dakota says

"Maybe I don't want your fucking help!" I shout, tossing the controller onto the couch

The pause screen stares at me. I was in the middle of a level and he interrupted my focus. I don't want to talk about swimming anymore.

"I don't want to learn, I don't want to try, I like floating, and I don't want to change that!" I shout

"But why?!" He shouts back

I flinch at his voice. It's not fair of me to yell at him and get scared when he does the same thing. I feel guilty as soon as it happens, but it doesn't stop me from shouting at him again.

"Because I am sick of people thinking that I'm fucking helpless! It's too vulnerable of a situation to be in with someone I barely even know!" I yell throwing myself back into the cushion

"Faith..." Dakota starts

I don't give him the chance to finish.

"Anything could happen! No one can be certain that something couldn't go wrong! Too many risks and not enough rewards! I can't do it! So just fucking drop it!"

I'm breathing heavy. I can feel my heart rate rising. Whiskey comes trotting over and hops up onto my lap, pushing Dakota out of the way, and putting pressure on my chest. Dakota just stares at me. He tries reaching over but Whiskey lets out a growl from deep in her chest, warning him to back off. This fight has escalated far out of my control. I want to go home now.

"I want to go back to Zak's." I say

"Okay." Dakota says

Twenty minutes later, we're pulling up to Zak's house. I watch as the gates open and we pull into the driveway.

"Zak should be home in half an hour. You think you'll be okay by yourself?" Dakota asks

"I'll be fine." I say before getting out of the car and slamming the door behind Whiskey.

I stomp up to the front door and unlock it with the key that Zak gave me. I turn back to Dakota, who's still sitting in the driveway watching me through the windshield. I slam the front door behind me and go to my room upstairs. Gracie and Whiskey follow me up, excited to play with one another.

I hear Dakota's car pull out of the drive and the gates close behind them. Quickly, I change into a tight fitted long sleeve shirt meant for getting in the water, then I get some long shorts on. Before I know it, I'm outside standing on the edge of the pool looking down at the water. My reflection stares back at me, face hardened, eyes determined. My jaw tightens, fists clench, breath heavy.

I'm ready to get into the water.

One step.

Two steps.

Waist deep in the water. My hair blows in the wind behind me. I look down again. This time, instead of seeing my own face in the water I see a dark room and a familiar looking tub. I lean down and feel my head duck under the water to look closer, then I step out on the other side in the dark room.

It's cold in here. I'm shivering in my thin clothes meant for Vegas heat and sun. A man walks in. I can't see his face but I know it's a man by his size alone. He saunters towards me and I instinctively step back in fear. I look behind me to get back through the water and get back into reality. I'm met with a concrete wall.

"No. No, no, no, no, no, no!" I scream pounding the wall with my hands

I can feel my palms bleeding and stinging, bloody handprints splattering the concrete. The man grabs me by the neck and a blood curdling scream comes from deep within my chest. He forces me to my knees and grips me by the hair.

"Stay fucking still." He growls as he drags me by the hair towards the tub.

It's full of water. I realize what's happening just before he shoves my head under. The cold metal bites into my skin as he holds me down under the freezing water. I struggle, flailing, splashing water all over the place as I attempt to escape. I'm pulled up just before I start inhaling water. Gasping, spluttering, and coughing, I beg for him to stop. He shoves my head under the water again. I scream, bubbles coming out around me. I accidentally inhale some and choke on my way up.

The man thankfully lets me cough out all the water before oh so nicely grabbing me by the throat and shoving me into the tub, holding my neck. I can't breathe. I fight back for as long as I possibly can, kicking, scratching, reaching for his eyes, anything to get him to let go. He pulls me back up and I cough again, trying to get air into my lungs. He doesn't even let me breathe properly before shoving me down again. The process repeats multiple times until the fight just leaves my body. I can feel myself go limp in the water, bubbles fading from my view. I'm half conscious when he pulls me up from the tub and tosses me onto the floor, face down. The water comes up from my lungs. I'm just strong enough to keep myself up on my elbows, trying to crawl away from him. He just kicks me in the stomach and leaves me there to rot. When I have enough strength to sit up, I find myself strapped to a table, head back, the same man standing over me. Another joins him and places a towel over my face. I scream and thrash around on the table. They dump cold water over my face, talking amongst themselves about how much fun they're having with me. Repeatedly pouring water over my face, making me choke, I feel like I'm drowning.

I'm suddenly aware of another presence. It's a male presence and he's... familiar? I trash around, fists clenching, ready to swing at these men. They grab my arms and struggle to hold me down as I writhe.

A male voice comes somewhere from far away. I can hear him faintly. I try to focus.

C'mon Faith! Wake up! Wake up!

Wake up, Faith!

"FAITH!"

My fist connects with his jaw before my brain can register who he is. His head swings to the left but his hold on me doesn't falter. I'm standing in the pool, still in my swimsuit, sunscreen on my face, hair in a ponytail. My breathing is heavy and I'm shaking.

"What the fuck?!"

Dakota looks at me, his face starting to swell where I've hit him.

"I.. I- I- I'm so sorry!" I stammer, finally getting a hold of my surroundings.

"Are you okay? What happened?" he asks

I look at him for a moment before realizing that he's IN the pool with me, his sweatpants soaked, the bottom of his shirt following suit.

"You're getting wet! What- what are you doing here?" I ask grabbing him

Feeling his skin in my hands helps ground me a little more. I try to focus on anything else, the bottom of the pool on my feet, the way the water feels on my skin, Dakota's hands on my shoulders.

"Faith, are you okay?" Dakota asks

He looks around briefly and then slowly leads me out of the pool. I start shaking harder, like I'm in a freezer, or just had a panic attack.

"Talk to me, Faith." He asks as he leads me to the patio chairs

"I- I was... I was gonna learn how to swim." I say softly, remembering what I was originally out here to do

"By yourself? Why would you do something like that?" Dakota asks, crouching down in front of me

"I... I don't know. I just... figured I could do it by myself." I say

He sighs and finds a towel for me.

"Where are your towels? You need to dry yourself off." He says

"There's a couple inside the bar." I say pointing to the outdoor bar counter to our left.

He runs to get two towels and hands one to me. I use it to dry my legs and then to cover myself up.

"Faith, what happened in the pool?" He asks

"I just told you." I say

"No. You told me what you were going to do. When I came out here you were just... standing there, staring into the water. What was going on?" He asks

I can feel tears welling up in my eyes. My bottom lip quivers. It's now or never.

"I-I'm scared of the water. I was just... looking at my reflection in the pool and then I saw this... this room. I know it from... from when I was missing. I... they... he tried to drown me. He held me under the water by my neck and didn't let me breathe. He had me tied to a table with a towel over my face and... and waterboarded me." I say, sobs wracking through my body.

I open my arms for a hug, which he accepts.

"I'm sorry. I should have just told you." I cry into his shoulder "I was worried that you would think it was dumb that I couldn't swim very good. I shouldn't have argued with you earlier and I shouldn't have hit you. I'm really sorry, Kota."

"Hey... hey... You're okay. It's okay, Faith. I shouldn't have pushed the subject. I understand your fear, it's shitty, absolutely terrible what you went through, but you have to try to remember that you have people you can talk to. I'm here to listen or give advice if you need it. I'm your boyfriend and I want you to feel safe around me, however long it takes. Fights happen, it's nothing to stress about, I know we can always work things out. I'm here for you." He says giving me a light squeeze.

I nod and just hold him for a little longer before pulling away. A full hug is not something I've given a lot of people. Only Zak and Kade. Not even Jay, despite being very close to him, gets that luxury. It took me a while to even let Dakota hold my hand after we started dating. He wasn't allowed to even touch me more then necessary when I was first found and traveling with them.

"Are you okay?" I ask Dakota

"I'm fine. My face will be a little sore for a bit, but I'll be fine." He says

I gently cup his face and turn it to the side. A large red mark in the shape of my fist is outlined in red on his jaw. It's already started to welt and bruise in some parts. I run my thumb over it and then apologize again.

"I want to go inside." I say

We head inside to shower, separately of course, and sit on the couch in the living room to watch TV. I'd given Dakota a pack of ice for his face. I end up falling asleep on the couch, exhausted from the days events.

[doctorsiren]

Thinking about how (a humanoid) Bill would see Ford be older after those 30 years (because that’s how people work), and so to try and appeal to him again, he makes himself look older too (I mean, he’s WAYYYY older than Ford actually, but I just mean visually)

But then after he’s killed and sent to the Theraprism, he goes back to his original twink look, and I say this because I already did a drawing of my humanoid Bill in prison and I like how that design worked with his pathetic traumatized orange jumpsuit look more than I think I would like it with an older looking version 😁 plus uhh I don’t wanna deem that drawing “not canon” to my brain so yeah

[seasicksilver]

reading the Iliad is an experience

[late-draft]

Ever since I saw there are ATLA chibi shorts, my brain has never been the same

[cedric-k-rossignol]

Kuroshitsuji ED | Ciel Phantomhive (S1-S5)

[madfantom]

I wanted to finish this challenge back in November, but I was doing other things like a comics and etc. In addition, I recorded a speedpaint for it, but I transferred the material to a defective USB flash and it broke all the contents.

All art under cut