#But honestly the names...

[watchinglikeafangirl]

Every thought I had after binging Heart Killers

- also episode 10 really got to me

I know, I am very late to the party, I took a long time off. It was only yesterday that I realized Heart Killers was already airing and it's already been 10 WEEKS?! I don't know how I missed this but anyways, turns out I've started watching at the right time, ending with the most heartbreaking scene after binging this show. Good timing on my part, I'm very hooked for next week.

I didn't have high expectations since this is a GMMTV show. Even with this cast, they could have messed this up badly, but they didn't. This show has so much going on, no episode feels like a filler, the plot doesn't take forever and it's thrilling to have the characters know about each other and not saying anything for a whole episode. Truly iconic.

I am really positively surprised by Joong. His acting...he stands out and he shows raw and complexe emotions, I didn't think he had it in him but he's really good. I think he and Kao really bring a lot of emotions and authenticity to their roles.

Khao had me when Bison finds out Kant and Style are the snitches and working for the police. His face and especially his eyes said it all. He didn't cry that much, it was just one silent tear but everything was there. The utter betrayal and heartbreak really hit and Khao really acted his heart out. I think that moment shows his qualities as an actor. In general, I love the complexe roles he gets. Bison is absolutely cute until he isn't, until he kills people. I think James was a very good choice to show how fucked everybody is when Bison is angry.

"When I'm with you, you either make me feel so scared or really safe."

And then we have Joong. Since Hidden Agenda, I see his charisma, he has a very special vibe no matter which role he plays, he catches me. And not just because of his looks, guys. The scene when Fadel finds out about Style and slow dances with him, his eyes said it all. The betrayal, the heartbreak, the hope and the anger. He went through it all and let himself enjoy that moment, still hoping it wasn't true, it's a world breaking while he still believes.

He confesses his feelings, it's absolutely romantic and Style kisses him with so much affection, it breaks Fadel's heart (and mine). Because when the kiss ends, he cannot look at Style, he looks down, he hides. So he chooses to hide his face entirely and hugs Style while they slow dance. I didn't even see it at first but there is a tear falling, a silent one because it cannot be true and because Style can't know. That's when Joong absolutely delivered for me.

Sooooo, after all of that, we need to talk about that scene in episode 10 because Joong really had me there. I wasn't crying with him but I really felt a little bit depressed after that and listened to this soundtrack 10 times before I was able to do anything (song: Let it all out on me - Houses on the hill). Because it's not just the dialogue or the tears. No, it's the hug. Fadel was holding on to dear life, he clung onto Style like he was gonna die if he didn't. And maybe he woud have really died on the inside if he didn't. The whole scene is so desperate and Fadel's trail of thoughts so agonizing and it's so quiet that I could really feel it. It's raw. The trust between them is so deep but in the end it doesn't matter because Fadel is scared, I think he probably is the most scared he's ever been for Style. And most importantly, he's grieving. His ex died because of his mother, he feels responsible, he wants to push Style away and it really takes him a minute to realize Style isn't going, isn't doing what Fadel thinks is right, is not dead yet.

It's the way Style keeps holding Fadel's face and whiping the tears away. He is a keeper, he is a whole green flag in that scene, he is everything for a broken boyfriend. And I feel like the dialogue is not necessarily the most heartbreaking thing about that scene, it's not even that important. It's what happens after that shows their deep understanding and trust for each other.

We get a kiss, a kiss on the forhead, an abrupt hug, a crying hug, a desperate hug, Fadel collapsing and Style padding his head.

If that isn't love then I don't know what is. It feels like a conversation, it's Style assuring Fadel of his love, Fadel realizing it, Fadel being scared but also very relieved that he could share those thoughts and that weight. And after that he's just hanging on, he's desperately trying to feel Style near him and the moment he realizes Style keeps on holding him while he's sobbing, he's gone. Everything just comes together and we don't really get that often in BLs. Of course, his situation is...special...but still, there are moments in life when things are too much and that's when you lean on your partner or friend or anyone else.

Heart Killers has charcters that just feel extremely real even if that whole story is not close to reality. But that scene, it can happen to any of us at some point in life. It can be too much and it's hard to trust someone so much that you let yourself feel everything you don't even allow yourself to feel when you are alone. It is overwhelming but I really like how honest this scene feels. Like I said, it's lingering in my head, it caught me off guard and I just thought about it for a little while after.

[yeepof]

I understand that tall men are our POV characters, but surely being like a foot taller than everyone around them would have some occasional consequences

[ratcandy]

we just keep naming bugs like this

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

It's always so weird to come down from the biology heavens to see what the average person believes about animals, plants, ecosystems, just the world around them. I don't even mean things that one simply doesn't know because they've never been told or things that are confusing, I'm talking about people who genuinely do not see insects as animals. What are you saying. Every time I see a crawling or fluttering little guy I know that little guy has motivations and drive to fulfill those motivations. There are gears turning in their head! They are perceiving this world and they are drawing conclusions, they are conscious. And yet it's still a whole thing if various bugs of the world feel pain or if they are simply Instinct Machines that are Not Truly Aware of Anything At All????? Help!!!!!! How can you look at a little guy and think he is just the macroscopic animal version of a virus

[unfortunatelymerlin]

[lavender-rroses]

this is the vibe i think

[enidtendo64]

TW: Heavily implied Child Abuse

Stowaway AU where Pacifica becomes a stowaway on the Stan-O-War 2 after trying to run away from home to California. Things don’t exactly work out as planned, but at least she’s got a “Summer Internship” away from her parents now!

[hinamie]

mentor

[stargirl230]

Muse // 心上人

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

[albinogel]

Until the last breath.

[everwalldigan]

I love the idea of all the robins kinda being clones of each other with just a few differences and a concussed Bruce not being able to tell who he’s squinting at so he just says generic statements and avoids saying any names

Bruce (sitting at the breakfast table): so… how’s the weather… dick?

Jason (grinning): you do know I’m gonna hold this against you for like, the next 2 months right

Bruce: (groans into his hands)

Bruce (walking into the living room): hey have you read through the files I gave you yesterday?

Dick: (confused cause he took a day off to surprise Bruce) ?

Bruce: so?

Dick: er… no?

Bruce: Dick?? What are you doing here?

Bruce (walks into the kitchen with a fresh concussion): Jason? I thought you were on a mission with the outlaws?

Tim: (frozen through mid fridge raid, having assumed they were past Bruce calling him Jason since yk. He’s a shit brickhouse now and Tim is, well, obviously not): uh?

Bruce: *turns around and leaves*

Bruce: Oh hey Cass, when did you arrive from Babs’?

Damian: (slowly turns around in the black hoodie he’s wearing) we’re not even the same gender

Bruce: (under his breath) yeah but the same height

[vvenuspng]

💥📣 BLITZO SUX

[hesperocyon-lesbian]

This is fucking sickening. I’m not even sure what to say

[b1ttersweet-dreams]

beauty in meaninglessness

[soapyakships]

i start over with a dead variable

[rainscenes]

Everywhere I look it’s just one big reminder that my best friend is gone and it sucks.

8.11 | Holy Mother of God