#DAY 5: First times
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11/20
#big day for doomed yaoi enjoyers#(me)#i’m never ever doing this again i was screaming every minute coloring this i literally cannot do hard light#biggest case of “trust the process” i’ve ever experienced in my life#also i was gonna originally do a gun instead of knife to keep it canon but i quickly learned i can’t in fact draw guns#a knife is more symbolic anyway. stabbed in the back. yk#(trying to comfort myself that i can’t draw firearms even after eight years of art)#i remember playing this scene for the first time and actually breaking down at 2am bc that betrayal STUNG#i actually had no remorse for akechi after that 😭😭 i actually felt like a sadist for enjoying beating his ass in shidos palace#akechi as a character was specifically designed to make me go through all five stages of grief within a matter of minutes#absolute rollercoaster of emotions#ANYWAY IM FINALLY FREE TIME TO NOT DO ART FOR THE NEXT FOUR MONTHS 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼#persona 5 royal#persona 5#p5#p5r#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#goro akechi#akechi goro#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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So,I read silver's relaxation vigente and now I'm sad for the poor boy. If lilia broke up silver's curse why is it acting so strongly on him?
to be fair, the chronological placement of his birthday story just doesn't make any sense in general. like, it can only really take place during his second year, since Ace and Malleus are both there...yet we have seen pretty definitively what Silver was doing on the evening before/morning of his 18th birthday, and it was very much NOT his history homework. this myth?
jk jk I think it's just one of those card stories that's meant to be more...perpendicular to canon, if that makes sense? 😅 like a lot of them aren't really supposed to fit into a specific point in the timeline; instead all the characters and relationships tend to be somewhere vaguely post-episode 1 (occasionally with a bonus post-6 Ortho) except Yuu is already friends with everyone and nobody is surprised to hear them call Malleus Tsunotarou.
mostly they can get away with it, but it starts getting a bit weird with the cards that are supposed to be set at specific times. :T for those I think you gotta just kind of suspend your disbelief and take 'em as, like...little what-if AUs, or something like that! it's not exactly not canon, but more like. this is Silver's birthday if none of the narrative development happened and so his curse is still in effect, or something. 🤷 uhhhh basically Twst's timeline is an eldritch thing that cannot be perceived by mortal eyes, to try will lead to nothing but suffering, down this path dwells only madness.
that said I do 100% accept the presented canon that Silver's roommate is in eternal torment. this is the real victim of Twst right here.
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#kutsurogi my room#silver runs a comb through his hair once and instantly becomes a sparkling oujisama#the timeline may not make any sense but i believe it#i mean you can kind of see how they've been trying to work around the fact that we're in year 5 of birthdays#these ones take place the morning before the party! these ones are all set on the same day and they're at a museum!#and yet by my count we're still at everyone having at least three mandatory birthday parties with three different mandatory birthday outfit#nrc is ridiculous but is it THAT ridiculous#(don't answer that)#same with halloween tbh#(that one line in lost in the book nmbc where malleus is like 'i can't wait for sebek to have his first nrc halloween }:)'#while yuu is RIGHT THERE and actively tsunotarou-ing it up...)#it's just inevitable after a certain point i think given they're going for a sort of timeless non-spoilery feeling to the stories#so you gotta be willing to just roll with some of it#(i say after writing this whole post about how silver's birthday is unstuck in time)#that said while i don't personally subscribe to the time loop theory...i mean...#is it discontinuity or the world's most incredible foreshadowing? time (so to speak) will tell
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also been thinking abt pooki with his cunty scarf💅
if my next drawing post isnt the comic update take me out back and shoot me like a sick dog
#ghost#this was a wip too and its mainly to keep that damn twitter algorithm from throwing me into the abyss if im not on every fukkin day#i got sonethin imma post on patreon bc christ sake ppl are paying me but otherwise no more fukkin around#my first time seeing him wit the scarf a 'slay queen' slipped out despite me never really fukkin saying shit like that AHA#ghost with the crustiest bloodshot eyes from getting 3 hrs of sleep bawling his eyes out in the shower and smoking 5 blunts#bc girl thats how it is#my art#fanart#ghost call of duty#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost mw2#ghost cod#mw3#call of duty#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty modern warfare 2#call of duty modern warfare 3#put em all in there fuggit
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DUDE.
#FLAYYR.#IVE BEEN FOLLOWING YOU SINCE THE SONGS OF WAR DAYS.#IVE BEEN STALKING YOUR ART SINCE 2020.#I REMEMBER YOUR FANART FOR ABBIGAIL AND VULCAN.#dude i have admired your stuff for 5 years and every time you post its like the sun coming out behind the clouds#so like my very first serious fandom space was that blucking songs of war series and it was my first time finding so many likeminded artist#and to me you were like. the coolest most cracked one around#i have always been way too shy to say it directly#but i have admired your work from afar since i was 14 so this is kind of a mini dream come true HAHA#sorry this got long this is actually insane to me#thank you for drawing my goofy aah humanformer soundwave#everybody check out his art because you use pure cocaine to cook it or something i dont know how its so good#transformers#maccadam#soundwave#humanformers#tf art#artists on tumblr
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I was talking and I mentioned that I have my old Game Boy and original Pokemon cartridge. I said, "I think they still work."
I was told, "The internal batteries on the Game Boy cartridges have run out. They're all dead."
"Oh," I said, trying not to show how crestfallen I was. I felt like I was losing nerd cred for not knowing that, although I never kept up with that type of info anyway. I'm here for the fantasy and imaginative aspects of games, and tend not to follow the competitive or technical details.
I tried not to feel anything as I went home. If they were real animals, I reminded myself, I would have had to say goodbye long ago.
But like so many other people, Pokemon was my childhood. It was all I thought about and dreamed about, and the closest thing I could imagine to heartbreak was the knowledge that they weren't real. I spent nearly all my time writing longhand self-insert Pokemon fanfiction--far more than I spent actually playing the game. My Pokemon were with me in my imagination wherever I went. I started playing Pokemon Blue when I was 5, and the last time I had played it was probably when I was 9 or 10. I remembered I had turned it on again one more time after that, not to play it, but to look at my childhood Pokemon.
It was during high school, after a move overseas that completely upended my life, and I was struggling with the crushing blow of being taken away from everything I knew and trying to make sense of anything (least of all adolescence) in another language. All I wanted was to go back to childhood and have everything go back to how it was before.
Seeing my Pokemon, just as I'd left them, had comforted me. I had looked at their stats pages, taken photos of them with my digital camera (that I don't even know if I still have), and then turned it off without doing anything.
That was probably 9 or 10 years after the games came out. It had been a long time since then. I had long since taken the AA batteries out of my Game Boy Color and left it untouched. I didn't even have AA batteries anymore.
It had worked then. But now it had been 27 years... I thought about not trying to turn my cartridge back on. As long as I didn't turn it on, I could believe my Pokemon were still there, the way I remembered them.
On my day off, which happened to be Pokemon Day, I googled and read that some people on forums and Reddit were still able to play their original Pokemon games.
Then... it was possible. I went out to buy toothpaste. At the store, I asked where I could find AA batteries.
It was a big thing for me to be able to go to the store and buy things myself. When I moved at age 13, I felt like something went wrong with growing up. It was difficult to follow what people were saying, and people didn't always understand what I said either. I had been introverted even in English, but now I had enough negative experiences that I became afraid and stopped trying to talk to people altogether.
I threw myself into video games and reliving childhood memories. The internet was where I could communicate in my first language and understand. I lived online and didn't interact with the real world. On the internet I felt like I was understood and could find people who shared my interests the way I did, but in the real world it always felt like I could get hurt if anyone knew me.
I realize now that I could have had a better experience overseas if I'd known how to adapt and socialize, but this was not something I knew even in English, and trying to learn in another language made it ten times harder. I'm sorry now for missing out on interactions that I know I could have had, but I just didn't know how. I wouldn't know how until I learned, and it took me a long time to learn.
I grew up online, in the company of others who had trouble fitting in with the real world, even in their own language. Those experiences shaped me, and the friendships I've made and support I've received online are invaluable to me. The internet gave me a way to live, and through it I learned how to interact with others. But in many ways, for many years, it felt like my life was put on hold and I stopped growing up.
Several years ago I moved back, to not far from where I was born, and I was able to work for the first time. I began to interact with people and feel like I had a place in the real world.
After shutting myself away for so many years, every little step I made out in the world felt terrifying. But every little thing I did on my own made me feel like I was living for the first time.
Even something as little as going to the store and buying a pack of batteries.
I was directed to a shelf at the end of an aisle, and found myself looking at a rack of lithium AA batteries. Did they not sell the old kind anymore?
I walked around to the other side and was relieved to find the familiar black and brown Duracell batteries I'd known from my childhood. I felt more confident about putting in a battery that looked the same as I remembered. The smallest pack they sold was an 8-pack for $12.99. I really didn't need 8 batteries. I didn't have any other devices that used them.
I thought, what if I turn it on and it doesn't work and I'll have wasted $12.99?
I also thought we might already have batteries. I might be able to say, "Mom, do we have any batteries?" and she'd pull out two AAs from a drawer somewhere and I'd save my money.
But somehow I felt like part of what was important about this was being an adult and being able to buy my own batteries.
Yet... what if it just ended up making me sad? Was it better not to know?
I went to the checkout with just the toothpaste and stood hesitating at the edge of the checkout line.
If I didn't get the batteries now, and it turned out we didn't have any batteries, I wouldn't try it. I knew I would just put it off until even more time passed, and then... "Are you in line?" someone asked me.
"No," I said, and I turned around and went back to the shelf.
I bought the batteries.
At home, I took out my original Game Boy Color from the drawer where I left it, the one my dad had surprised me with when I was 5 years old and that I had brought overseas and back.

I put the batteries in and turned it on without a cartridge first to make sure the batteries were inserted correctly. The Game Boy logo scrolled across the screen and it made the familiar blinging Game Boy startup noise. I turned it off again, satisfied.
I took out my original Pokemon Blue cartridge, momentarily having to remember which way it went in, and slotted it in.
I turned it on, watched the whole Pokemon Blue intro out of nostalgia, and then pressed START.
My heart leaped for joy.
MY POKEMON!!!! MY POKEMON ARE ALIVE!!! 🥺🥺🥺
My original Pokemon, that were with me in 1998 when I was 5-6 years old, are still with me 27 years later. I want to cry!!! I love the old sprites, I'm SO happy to see them again 😭😭😭 the Pokemon look so little and cheerful at the same time, which I love 🥺🥺🥺 I know there are people with many more hours on their games, who have leveled all their Pokemon to 100. But these are my Pokemon who were with me through my childhood, and I spent many more hours making up stories about them than actually playing the game. I'm so happy to see them again 😭😭😭
All I want is to see my Pokemon. My other Pokemon are in boxes. Now, how do I get to the nearest PC? Where am I?
Oh... Oh. I have to confess something. When I was a kid, I was scared of the dark cave areas, and whenever I got to them, I stopped playing for a while. (I was stuck at Mt. Moon until I was like, 7.) So I never actually beat the game.
And here I am on Victory Road, with the team of Pokemon I was taking to the Elite Four, without an Escape Rope.
The only way for me to see my other Pokemon is... to finally make it through Victory Road, after 27 years?!
#pokemon#pokemon blue#kanto#gen 1#long post#text post#i know long format blog posts aren't standard here but i don't know where else to put this#i'm so happy i've had tears in my eyes. i had the BEST pokemon day i could have imagined#some people may be surprised i didn't just have a team of water or grass types but it was my first pokemon game and i wanted to be balanced#(also.. i'm not actually even sure i knew how to swim yet at that age?! i think i learned when i was 4-5)#BLASTOISE!!! my original blastoise my favorite i'm so happy to see him again!!! ;;---;;#i started training a drowzee because i needed to put pokemon to sleep for catching and hypno ended up just being so strong i got so attache#kitty helped me earn money to buy pokeballs with pay day#i always thought vulpix was incredibly cute and ninetales was awesomely beautiful#it was a tradition for me to have a haunter in every game because gengar is just so cool and cute (though i never had anyone to trade with)#but it's okay because haunter is also very cool and cute and i love my haunter#and i had a pikachu like red and yellow (but mine evolved!)#sorry about the overexposed 'screenshots' it actually takes a frustratingly long time to edit them into anything presentable even like this#but there's something nostalgic to me about seeing it on an actual game boy (color) instead of only the screen itself
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👾 DIGITAL BARRIER 👾
#I MADE IT IN TIME#I made it in time? I made it in time!!!#wishshipweek2025#thanks for waiting guys you're the best#wishship week day 5#prompt: firsts/barriers#I hope I got the meaning of the prompt correctly lol...#and if not.. well. it'll be just a random ygo fanart#I just really liked that tamagochi chapter and honestly? who doesn't#firstly i painted it with watercolors. then covered with gouache. then glued all that stars nd random colorful dots.#And I did all of that while I was sick. Anything for you my friends#watch the reblog for process! just like the previous time#my art#yugioh#yu-gi-oh#yugi mutou#jonouchi katsuya#ygo#wishshipping#thanks for the event everyone!
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clown 1 and clown 2
#my art#absolutely do not need these to show up in tags#is it still only the first 5 ?#or has tumblr changed?#anyway 2 seperate art block breaker doodles with not so great success#in that I didn't finish either of them for so long and then decided I needed to finish Smth and these were the closest to done#I won't be able to draw digitally over easter and I'm already 🧍 about it... my art time.........#there's so much wrong with them but I'm knocking my hands away these are Not worth fixing hdfuihgd#anyway it turns out that if you don't wanna draw boots and take them off socks look so off. ugly toes instead I'm sorry...#I'm yapping I'm yapping I feel like I woke up for the first time in days but also I should've been asleep 2 hours ago#if overtired is not a term in english it needs to be !#tloz#a link to the past#these do not need to be posted on their own But. they also need to get out of my folders so I can post smth real soon... soon........
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you'll never guess which movie i finally watched after 2 years of being lazy
#dont you just love it when your artstyle changes like 5 times in the span of a day#i saw emmachen1003 give them the glove type thingys and went “that looks cool. im stealing it”#so uhm. props to them for being awesome and making cool art#anyways that was a fun movie#not gonna say the title here cause i think it messes with searching and i dont wanna do that#that n frame is like the first time i have ever done a decent angle/perspective thing#im so proud of it you don't even know#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones nori#absolute solver#i guess#or is it absolutesolver#whatever#oh yeah uhmm#murder drones episode 7#murder drones episode 7 spoilers#murder drones spoilers#its been 2 weeks but im gonna give it another day just to be safe#just realized i fucked up the quote and its pissing me off so edited. go fuck yourself
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day 356
yall remember arasolfef?
i remember arasolfef
#day 356#year 5#sollux captor#aradia megido#feferi peixes#homestuck#arasolfef#the og poly trio for 15yo me#the first time i looked at people treating three characters like a love triangle and went#'hold on now i think there is another solution here'#momentous for my personal development honestly#and for the fandom youths Yes back in the day there was a not insignificant amt of fancontent#that pitted aradia and feferi against each other for this shit#or at the very least a lot of like...#'ohh poor ghost aradia must feel so very sad and dejected bc sollux has CHOSEN FEFERI OVER HER....'#and i for one am glad we as a fandom have moved past this#to be entirely fair to everyone back then tho. it was 2011. i think we were all just a little bit worse in 2011#yknow due to it being. 2011.
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the rizz verses animatic in all its glory. consider it a christmas gift !!
find @sassylich 's trine 2 stream (ft. méabh de brún) here !!
#this took me 5-6 days and it's about 90 frames. high effort shitposting#i've listened to méabh say “gyatt” with various pronunciations so many times it's scorched marks into my brain now. keep me in your prayers#THAT FUCKASS MUSIC TOO.#it's so funny how you can witness the quality degrade from the first like 15sec onwards T_T#the silt verses#siltposting#tsv#the silt verses fanart#tsv fanart#animatic#brother faulkner#sister carpenter#twin mouths#art#my art#doodles#digital art#my animatic#my video
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I started drawing this next day after I finished Act 6
13 or so days and it's finished!
Main things are traditional and Loop's body was edited digitally after
Unedited it looks like this

I've been torn on how to do Loop's body for the entirety of lining, also

A bit sad the main lines are visible only as a wip, most of this thing is literally just a ton of sharp lines

I think it's also my first day of drawing, Loop is just a sketch here (feat. my leg)

I even finished the beans before it so they were a moral support, because if you let me things like this take a year
#fanart#my art#isat#isat fanart#in stars and time#isat loop#loop#traditional art#artists on tumblr#Phew#So anyway this was my way of figuring out my thoughts after finishing the game#I didn't even actually finish it with credits playing at that moment#This type of art is my therapy#And in a way literally how my personality works from big figures to small details of thinking about anything#It's really calming!#I won't tag paper figures but they're here#Like special guests#In any case the funniest thing was showing this to my English teacher and she was like 'wow this looks stressed' or something#Like she immediately looked at the lines and after I showed her my old Flowey drawing like this she was like#'oh it makes sense! This one looks calm but this one is clearly you not feeling good'#Because I was kinda#Like sitting there in the semi-park and feeling sick since morning before I started drawing this and slowly I got better#I already talked about this on my first 'big' isat thing - I needed to think a bit#And not think at the same time just literally letting myself sort stuff out#Like. I fell asleep at 6 am that day and woke up at 10 4 hours of sleep after playing full Act 5 and two hats stuff IS STRESSFUL#SUPER STRESSFUL! Like I felt like I was playing for 4 hours while sleeping#Anyway by the time I finished it aka today I'm feeling way better and I'm literally talking a walk right now#Touching grass as we speak#Anyway phew!#Now to that animatic that's plaguing my mind to draw it nowww
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are archen and rufflet besties
What a delightful ask! I do believe that they are!!!
#just a couple of gen 5 birds having a lovely time :) on that note while not included here i do think pidove is their friend too#also sorry for how messy this is :( the drivers for my tablet have been inoperable for days so i had to do this with 0 pen pressure and-#-no pen stability :( i have been very upset abt this but this ask was a big mood booster :>#despite the horrors (drawong tablet being funky) i persisted in the name of adorable birds#oh also#this was my first time drawing rufflet since i was a child! id like to think that lil baby me wld be proud at how much better weve gotten :)#haha oops its 4 am lemme schedule this for a normal time fhshfhshfh#archen#rufflet#pokemon#pkmn#pokemon art#my art
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“i never miss my mark.”
(P5 SPINOFF WEEK- Day Two: Show-Off/Showtime)
#persona 5#persona 5 strikers#p5#zenkichi hasegawa#p5spinoffweek2025#SORRY IM LATE AGAIN!!!#if i had a nickel for every day time i struggled with drawing zenkichi on day 2 of spinoff week. id have two nicke-#also my first time drawing his pt outfit.. its so hard man….
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you open my Super Important Documents and its just pictures of charles xavier
#xmen#mcu#xmen movies#xmen first class#charles xavier#professor x#snap sketches#todays schedule has been ruined by my ever occurring need to practice drawing movie charles its horrendous#i started this sheet last night but then i kept adding to it and i keep wanting to add to it but i MUST stop myself#in an ideal world i get paid to draw charles xavier and erik lehnsherr but no i live in this baka society#sleepless charles WAS inspired by me starting this at 1AM and forcing myself to sleep at 4AM#and then here i am picking i up still later .... i need professional help i fear but i aint got time for that#NEVERTHELESS I THINK IT GOT IT NOW. I THINK IM OK. i think i know how i wanna go bout drawing him now ...#chat can i confess that like. .5% of the reason i barely draw FC charles i because of his hair#for some reason some demonic entity prevents me from drawing it easily i am in STRUGGLE CITY#the only thing that gets me is that whenever i draw him i can only think of the likes of a disney prince but man thems the strokes ig#i also drew a quick dark phoenix charles but i figured id just keep this first class oriented#anything else i want to say ? uh. hm. its funny i never do any of these sheets for erik#genuinely On My Life made One (1) sheet and was like 'no yeah i got it. i got it down'#literally not my fault his head is So Shaped and defined but anyways. this aint about him.#i mean it could be. i still wanna do a doodle page concentrated on drawing how his powers show#more specifically how do i wanna draw the glow cause i cant decide on it ... also i wanna draw the 'levels' ...#but thats for another time. for right now i should probably eat i havent eaten all day#bye bye !!!!!! here's to hoping i draw something thats not a doodle sheet one of these days
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🫨🥰
#tko_art 25#avatrice#dumb ass losers#i don't have time to render this cuz i did this instead of working on my 2 ABB projects hahahaha#i'm so fucked teehee#locking in#beatrice took me forever and ava took me 5 seconds man what the hell#and still i'm disatisfied with beatrice#ava looks fine#i could do some more tweaking but i told mysself it'd be a tiny sketch#anyway i'll come back to render one day#zzzz#:3c#the sketchlines stay ON during sex#they're so stupid I love them#i think this is the first avatrice art that i've made that i'm proud#tears in my eyes#here's to more#debated on titling this say gex but i'll have some restraint
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girl who has suffered more than alll-mer
(ID in alt text)
#fear and hunger#fear and hunger termina#fear and hunger 2#samarie fear and hunger#fear and hunger samarie#samarie#doodles#mine#so hard to tag for a mononymic character. girl get a last name. domek is right there#these are the three samarie emotions: yearning radiating and Abject Misery#she also gets an emotional support mini-rina. it's what she would have wanted#took a 5-hour crash course in funger bc i saw marina's moonscorched. ended up feeling so strongly for samarie i had to exorcise it thru art#you can't put a pathetic sopping wet shaking unhinged little creature in front of me and expect me not to itch to treat her kindly for the#first time ever in her life#poor little unloved lamb let me keep you and coddle you and cover you in blood. let me give you one good day like a mouse soon to be fed to#a pet snake. let me feed you to the snake regardless.#anyway. the psychic attacks i've been fielding bc of samarina have been relentless. can unwell teen girls stop reflecting my life circa#junior high school. thanks
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