#Developers didn't completely abandon it and will pick it back up soon!

[don-dake]

Sen Sen the Chowhound!

[idrellegames]

Since I've been getting a few more asks about Episode 3—no I'm not hiding it from anyone, no it's not going to be released for the public any time soon, and yes, it is being worked on, and yes it is getting closer to being finished!

The majority of it is available to play as an alpha demo on my Patreon, although what currently playable is locked to specific Episode 2 endings.

My quarterly roadmaps are posted both here and on itch.io, and have all the updates about what's going on with Episode 3 and where I am currently am in development (Q1 report is here, Q2 report here!).

Episode 3 is the finale of Act 1. There are a lot of choices, a lot of decisions that will impact the future of your playthrough and your Wayfarer's journey. Many of your decisions from Episode 2 will come back to haunt you (in a good way or a bad way) in Episode 3. This episode is going to change everything, and the game and your Wayfarer will not be the same afterwards.

Finally, Episode 3 is the length of a full IF game due to its complexity. There is a reason why it is taking so long to develop. I know folks are impatient for more, but Wayfarer's episode structure is more like installments in a long-running series than chapters of a book. It takes time to pull off something like this, and I promise it will be worth the wait!

Green parts are playable and in the alpha build; blue is completed but not coded (and therefore are not in the alpha); yellow is in the drafting process; red is not started. word count is cumulative for all variations/routes/paths; single playthroughs will vary greatly in length depending on choices made.

I am very close to the end now, but it is very difficult to accurately estimate how long it will take me to finish. I know some people are angry about this, I know some people are disappointed and frustrated because the game is in-development and not a finished product. I know some people think I died and fell off the map or abandoned the project because it hasn't had a public update in a very long time (I didn't, I've always been here, working away).

I don't like releasing content before it's ready. I also don't like releasing episodes in bite-sized pieces even if it means more regular updates. I don't think that would make the game very enjoyable, and it also would make it buggier, with more time spent fixing stuff that I would have normally caught in the editing phase if I finished more things before coding.

I am well aware that Wayfarer is extremely ambitious in its scale, and I am going to live up to how ambitious it is. Ambition takes time, and also sometimes life hits hard. When you're a solo developer, no one else can pick up the slack if you get sick or have a family crisis or need to take time off, so you are going to perpetually be behind schedule.

(And no, other episodes are not going to be as long or as complicated as Episode 3!)

So, at this point I can't say when Episode 3 is being released. Only that it will be!

[jaylver]

GUYS MY AGE — S.JY

synopsis: dating guys your age almost all your life has got you sick and tired and most definitely deprived of being treated well. that was until you met an older guy at a club one night, not knowing it would soon develop into something more.

pairings: non-idol!jake x afab!reader

genre: strangers to lovers, romance, implied age difference, jake is aged up (everyone is legal aged!!!)

warning(s): profanities, drinking, mild suggestiveness (no smut)

wc: 1473

a/n: hi 😘 currently i'm still figuring out my next long fics and stuff so here's some drabbles that i fortunately squeeze out of my brain. i realised i don't have many jake fics despite him being bias 😭 i'm sorry for that </3 so here's one greatly inspired by hey violet's guys my age 💓 + my current fav jake pics. hope you enjoy this one! please leave a feedback and reblogs are appreciated!

masterlist | © jaylver 2023 all rights reserved

Going out to a party shouldn’t be a bad idea, right?

Maybe the first mistake was agreeing to an invite from your friends to a random party in the club, believing their claims that you should put yourself out there more after your break up. As much as you hate to admit it, they weren’t exactly wrong, especially when you stay cooped up in your room all day.

It has been months since the break up and you haven’t seen him since then. All because he was immature and didn’t want to grow up, which prompted the imminent break up. Well, there you were now, by your friends in a club you were unfamiliar with, dressed in something low-cut that they had picked out, and it surely worked out as you were gaining attention from people around.

A few drinks in later, you were starting to loosen up, feeling the need to dance and fuck around more. So, that was exactly what you did. 

Stumbling through the crowd and getting on the dancefloor was already tiring, but somehow that wasn’t stopping you from anything. The dim lights and loud music completely made you unaware that someone was approaching from behind, until you felt a presence close to your back and you spun around. 

Wow.

Despite the fact that it was hard to make out his face entirely, something about him and his aura screamed hotness. You could still tell how he looked vaguely. Prominent cheekbones, hair styled up, alluring eyes and the key point of it all, his lips.

From the looks of it, he doesn't seem to be your age either. He was most definitely older. Adding to the spice of it all, he seemed expensive. Hell, the cologne he wore alone smelled like something out of your budget.

Dressed in a simple button up, the chains and rings decked out on him simply added to his attractiveness. Gosh, he was the opposite of your ex. Now that you know, guys your age only disappoint you, so what's stopping you from having fun this one time?

Okay, so you weren’t about to get yourself a restraining order either. He was just too irresistible.  Although you were screaming at yourself internally, you held yourself back, instead, you let him come to you. And boy, he definitely did. 

Almost too naturally and smoothly, he moved closer to you, snaking an arm around your waist while you threw your arms around his neck. You didn’t say anything and he only took it as a sign to continue. 

“Hey,” he said by your ear, miraculously loud enough for you to hear. “I’m Jake,”

Usually, you might've thought it was lame, but maybe it was your semi-drunken state or simply his pretty face that gave you a green pass.

"Hi," you answered back rather meekly. "I'm Y/N,"

"Y/N," he echoed, eyes glinting in the dark. "Want to get out of here?"

Crazily and insanely you were for following him to his car, letting him drive you to an abandoned spot and sneak to the backseat. It was probably the Aussie accent and blond hair that got you. 

It didn't take long before you let him kiss you, feeling the flames bursting in your abdomen. The way he kissed was deep and feverish; dirty but gentle enough. Slowly, you felt his hand trace up your thighs and it made the hairs on your skin stand. 

You had to admit, you've never felt this way with your ex before. From the kiss to the touches, it was different. 

Guys your age don't know how to touch you.

The night eventually ended late but still, he went out of his way to drop you home, watching you get in safely before driving off. In a daze, you thought that was it, your potential lover was gone, but then you felt an uncomfortable prickly feeling in your chest area.

Reaching into your bra, you pulled out a piece of paper. One that had been slipped in discreetly moments ago when you were completely unaware.

Text/call me ;)

xx-xxxxxxx 

— Jake Sim

That was exactly what you did the next day. Even if it took you half a day and lots of pacing across your room, you managed to work up the guts to text him. Biting your nails in anxiety until his reply appeared. 

Luckily, he was a nice guy who was equally humourous over text. 

It wasn't long before you started calling each other. From one phone call turned into frequent calls that eventually included facetimes. 

Soon, this thing going on between you two progressed rather quickly but steadily. Him asking you out on a date was inevitable and you gladly let him take you out on one. 

It might've been a simple dinner that allowed you and him to get to know one another more, but throughout the whole night, he was nothing but a gentleman. First, it was him opening the car door for you that shocked you. No one has done this for you, your ex doesn't even have his own car to begin with. Then, it was him letting you hold his arm when going up staircases since you were in heels. Lastly, he even paid for dinner when you were against it, yet he didn't want to listen to your arguments.

This treatment was a little foreign to you, because simply, guys your age don't know how to treat you.

Days turned into months and you two naturally got closer, too close. Jake eventually asked you to be his girlfriend, to which you accepted and he even brought you out to celebrate, making sure to attack you with kisses while he was at it.

Despite being busy with work, he always made time for you. Tight schedules? He'd loosen some time up in between for you. Overtime in the office and not getting dinner together? He'd call you just to eat together over the screen. If there was one thing about Jake, it would be him getting clingy and missing you loads.

Him always going out of his way for you made you surprised even though you had been together for almost a year. It was his consideration and effort that got you soft for him. 

He wasn't like your ex. Not at all. He was completely unlike the people from your past. In a good way of course.

It was a shame. Guys your age don't know how to keep you or love you good.

The time has come where you wanted Jake to meet your parents, especially since you've already met his.

It was unfortunate that his schedule kept clashing and your mother has been on your wits end trying to get a glimpse of the guy you've been telling her about. But it was what it was and you could only tell her to be patient.

You were at home that day instead of staying over at his place, however, you were still texting Jake as per usual.

jakey: i'm omw to meet up w a business partner! i'm not sure when i'll be a back but don't stay up too late waiting, okay?

you: alrightt :( i'm over at my parents now. remember to eat and don't skip meals!!!!

jakey: yes yes ma'am. i'll let you know once the meeting is over, kay?

you: sure, drive safe!

You couldn't help but miss him at times, allowing him to fill your thoughts as you helped your mother set the table, not noticing an extra set of utensils placed. 

The usual business around the house around dinner hasn't changed over time. Even when the doorbell had rang, you didn't notice it at first, until it came the second, catching you off guard. You placed down the things in your hands, shuffling awkwardly to the door after calling out for your parents before opening it. 

"Jake?"

"Baby?"

What was Jake doing at the doorstep of your home? You promised to bring him over but wasn't he … busy?

"What do you mean 'baby'?" There came your father's voice, confusion laced in his tone.

"Mr L/N," Jake greeted stiffly, then the realisation dawned in his eyes. The last names, the similar features. Oh God.

"What are you doing here?" You ignored your surroundings, hissing in panic to Jake.

"F–for my business meeting," 

"Is he the guy you're dating?" Your father seemed to have also pieced it together, shock and bewilderment on his face as your mother joined his side.

"You're dating an older guy?"

There's going to be a whole explanation needed over dinner before any business is discussed.

Maybe Jake might've been an older guy but he was way more than that. He knew how to treat you, touch you, love you. Unlike guys your age.

Now you know, you're never going back.

( © jaylver all rights reserved. do NOT copy, plagiarise or edit my work and repost whatsoever. once discovered will be exposed and blacklisted. )

☆ permanent taglist (open):

@silentkarnival @strvlveera @freshsaladbowl @bejewelledgirl @fakeuwus @yenqa @hsgwrld

[studio-respite]

We're going to refresh this account with an announcement:

Reincarnation Trial is on hiatus!

(Rumi and Vauhn are going on vacation while we clean the game up) We've realized this was too big of a project for our first game, so we're changing some things. It's a common problem for game devs to go too hard into their first project, so let's talk about that a little more:

The project's been on hold for a couple of months now, because we want to start from the top again and really make things the right way, from the start. The game direction got a little messy and chaotic, the scope expanded with no direction, etc...this was initially Cheli's very small project to test the waters, but it quickly got out of hand the more fun we were having

So! We'll try to come back to it with fresh eyes, and in the meantime we'll hone our skills with a new project.

There's no risk of us abandoning the fun little project we started at the beginning of the year - we're just picking a smaller, more manageable one to complete so that we can learn and grow from that first. Our programmer @hazzmat-shelter's already been posting about it BUT we'll share more info here as it comes (and on Bluesky as well)

That being said, we'll be a little more active now! We'll share posts from our personal accounts here & post any major updates - this is more of a hobby for us than anything, so we'll share what we have whenever we happen to have it. Another big issue we had was trying to post weekly updates for a game that just didn't have enough development to keep up, so we're going to stay lax on how much effort goes into social media upkeep.

So, I mean. All of that being said…hello again everyone! See you again soon 👋

[yuseirra]

onk is so annoying~~~~~~~!!!aahh I actually feel like I'm going to get so many things right in the end and I have all the answers, I SERIOUSLY DO, I'm not- I'm not being full of myself or making baseless claims, I just SEE what they are trying to do with the writing, the feelings of the characters at least, some of them are painfully obvious BUT THEY JUST KEEP BEATING AROUND THE BUSH AND KEEP TRYING TO TWIST THINGS AWAY AND MAKE IT SEEM LIKE IT ISN'T. That's what I find so annoying!! It's actually one of the reasons why I took a break from reading the comic after some time when I picked up the work after having viewed S1 last year. I know what they're doing and why the characters are written like this, and how they're like this, I'm pretty positive!!

I was annoyed about Aqua last time because he still had feelings for Kana yet the authors made him entangled with Akane while he DIDN'T abandon his feelings for her, I'm really sorry but he shouldn't have treated Akane like that. It wasn't fair. His feelings towards Kana NEVER once changed. I JUST SAW THAT, the writers make him stray away from that feeling he was for painfully long, they better make the whole reveal fulfilling in the end, I KNEW aqukana was going to be endgame for so long. Aqua SHOULD NOT have treated Akane the way he did if he really wanted to build a genuine relationship with her. The anime S2 seems to leave off at there where he asks her to be a couple, well, I think he did try, but he didn't discard his feelings towards Kana as he did either. I just.. knew, that what happened wasn't what he truly wanted and this guy NEVER confronts his desires, he should have gone up and told the person he liked about his feelings but this comic considers something like this a suspense or a plot point and lets it drag on for dozens of chapters... I came BACK after they confirmed about his feelings because GOD it was so obvious. This whole story would have gone nowhere without him ever having gotten true to his feelings, nothing would have been resolved without it because he'd always have had this lingering feeling for Kana and it's just hanging with it without being acknowledged in the story!!! It's not about what ship I support exactly, it's- I know what characters have feeling for whom!!! and they try to make it seem like it's some big secret because I get it, endgame ships are important but Aqua, as much as I cared for him(he's been making me so angry lately though,) was being a douche to both girls. They both can go kick his butt for toying around with those girl's feelings. and ehh I can see regardless of who his love interest is, ultimately the one person he really cares about more than his own life is Ruby HSHSH.. What is that guy doing. His dad told him to go back and live!! I am mad!!!

and now, I already partly have a good idea about how Hikaru and Ai's relationship issue's going to be resolved but they have to DRAG IT ON AND MAKE ME SO NERVOUS. The authors must really like doing this and think it's very clever but again, this is so tedious and nerve-wrecking to watch as a weekly issue with Hikaru being completely out of it, he's totally gone insane!!! The one guy Ai wanted to confess to being in shambles is both so ridiculous and so tragic to look at!! Look at the total mess he's become, they can't make him be so..;; so ugly like this, it's so rude to his being as a character and I'm sure they aren't going to leave him be like this as Ai's other half(YES THIS GUY!!! IS AI'S OTHER HALF!! HE'S DEVISED TO BE HER MATCH FROM THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT STAGE!!)

Come on everyone, I know what I'm doing.

YOU CAN'T MAKE AI SAY WHAT SHE'S SAID TO/ABOUT HER MURDERER!!!! THAT'S 1. SO CRUEL, 2.A DOWNRIGHT DUMB CHOICE AS A WRITER AND IT DOESN'T HAVE A POINT!!

YOU MAKE HER SAY THAT BECAUSE THE GUY DIDN'T DO IT AND IS SOMEONE WHO SHE CAN TRULY LOVE THAT WAY!!! HER NAME MEANS LOVE!!! I just... caught that as soon as this dropped and they lay out all these dumb and confusing ideas later on and make things sooo messy but it's actually, ultimately leading in this direction because DID WE SEE ANY CLEAR PROOF THAT HE WANTED TO HURT AI OR GET BACK AT HER. WE DO NOT BECAUSE HE REALLY DIDN'T DO IT!!! IDK ABT HIM KILLING OTHER PPL THAT'S VAGUE BUT AT LEAST, THIS GUY LOVED AI!!!! WHAT THEY HAVE IS MUTUAL AND HIS FEELINGS FOR HER'S BEEN WHAT'S BEEN MAKING HIM GO ON WHEN HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY WILL TO LIVE AND FEELS PRACTICALLY DEAD AFTER SHE'S GONE!!

THIS GUY WENT INSANE AFTER HE LOST THE ONE SINGLE PERSON WHO MATTERED THE MOST IN HIS LIFE. HE'S NOT HIMSELF!! I just watched how he appeared in the final ep in the anime and I kept going: 'oh this guy. He's totally lost it. He's totally gone mad, the madman. he needs to see a psychiatrist' BECAUSE WHAT'S BEING PRESENTED, IS NOT HIM BEING HIMSELF. I really think.. the guy became possessed or became out of it after he wished to see Ai again. Look, Look at what's happening in the songs. SOMEONE WISHED THE DEAD TO BE BACK. SOMEONE WISHED TO BE ABLE TO BE WITH THEM. THEY WERE WILLING TO DO ANYTHING IF ONLY THAT WERE TO BE POSSIBLE. THEY WISHED UPON "A STAR". There is no one else other than him that would have made that kind of wish.

HE WANTS AI BACK!!!!

Help omygod I'm so tired of the writers just dragging on and spinning things in circles and confusing the readers I JUST GOT THIS OVER AND DONE WITH AS SOON AS THE CHAPTER AND THE SONGS DROPPED AND

If they're doing to make him a villain they never would have had to put in that scene where Ai tells her children she wants her boyfriend to be helped. That totally isn't necessary. They never need to have told us she really loved him and wished to live forever with him. This isn't the type of story where HER efforts would remain a dumb, futile choice, Hikaru's wish may be but AS FOR AI, NO!!!! IT JUST LITERALLY CANNOT HAPPEN!!! THE ENTIRE STORY HAS HER WISH AND LEGACY UNDERLYING IN THE PLOTLINE AS A FLOW, THE STORY DOES NOT FUNCTION WITHOUT IT BECOMING A REALITY!!! RUBY AND AQUA'S WISH AND DRIVES ARE HIGHLY CORRELATED TO THE WISH SHE HAS, AND IT'S NOT ABOUT THEM DETACHING AND STRAYING AWAY FROM IT, IT'S ABOUT THEM ADDING ONTO IT AND STEPPING FORWARD BUT IN THAT SAME DIRECTION! THEY EACH BECAME AN ACTOR AND AN IDOL THE WAY SHE WANTED AND THEY PROGRESSED IN THE ROUTES IN THEIR RESPECTIVE JOURNEYS. THIS STORY CANNOT STAND WITH AI BEING DISREGARDED, SHE'S THE PIVOTAL, KEY PERSON THAT ACTS AS THE BACKBONE!! SO THERE IS NO WAY HER BELOVED IS A SIMPLE CRAZY INSANE MANIAC THE MOMENT SHE TELLS THE READERS SHE ACTUALLY LOVES HIM DEARLY!! SOMETHING'S UP WITH THAT GUY AND HE'S ALSO SOMEONE THAT DESERVES TO BE SAVED!! THAT CHARACTER IS DEVISED TO BE AI'S LOVE. HE IS. AND YOU DON'T MAKE THAT GUY BE A BASELESS SIMPLE FREAK, THAT'S WHY LITERALLY NOTHING'S ACTUALLY BEEN... TOLD TO US ABOUT HIM??? BECAUSE, THE STORY WANTED US TO THINK THAT WAY BUT HE ACTUALLY WASN'T!!!! IT'S RUDE NOT JUST TO HIM BUT AI!! AND I AM SURE THE WRITERS REALLY DO LOVE AND CARE FOR AI. They won't make her look dumb. Not only does it make the character's charm die out, it just totally downplays and degrades the entire series as a whole. Ai is that central. I'm not saying this because I favor her, it's just.. the way she's devised.

it's such a relief this manga's on hiatus till October 24th~ 'v')/ ah.. I can relax.. I can relax. um, probably till this time next week, this comic is oh, it can get super dumb(I'm so sorry aka-san and mengo-san. I don't mean it in a literal sense I'm just TIRED THOUGH). There are so many things I like about it but it stresses me out, I honestly wouldn't be like this if I could not spot anything, but I just SEE these things so clearly and I feel so lonely about it, there is NO WAY it wouldn't go otherwise at least I think so, but it's not my work and the writers aren't me either so I can't be completely sure- it's... painful to wait out and see the characters making dumb choices and making crazy faces, making vague statements that actually result to nothing much and having to wait a week for unanswered questions, every week, I'm not sure if this is supposed be suspense or cliffhangers or what makes the readers want to grab the next episode etc but I've never seen a comic that works so much like a morning kdrama, it's been that way as of lately and it's really wearing me out

oh guys, oh guys don't worry. I never play a game I'd lose. I really need to buy one of those storywriting books- the "how to write" sort of things right. but I; just don't see this going any other way in an ultimate sense. The answers are already out. What I'm unsure is how we'd get there. I could sit back.. and come back after a year like the way I did last time, but I stepped in way too deep and it feels like a sinkhole.. I keep getting afraid if I get anything wrong, oh, I actually feel I can speak.. a little.. when they have breaks like these. otherwise I'd get too nervous to say anything... I can just focus with doing what I enjoy regarding this work without having to worry about just what the heck may come next...

I have like 3-4 ideas I want to draw, I want to get to that before the next chapter drops lol if this comic keeps making me so;; nervous, yeah, I can just rest. I've been pushing so hard~~~~ I'm sure the writers are having so much fun right now and I'm just playing into their hands as a reader because wouldn't it be so nice!! be so fun!! to have people feel things regarding their work! but it's time they start providing us answers now and give this story a good wrap-up. I hope it has like three volumes left at least; I will regret having read this piece if they just drop what that can be perfectly good because, because, I can see this piece getting a really good resolution. They can do it!!! I SEE IT! IT CAN HAPPEN! EVERYTHING CAN MAKE GOOD SENSE AND IT CAN BE GREAT!! AND I think that's what they're going for. I got so many things right about this piece, oh.. I really hope it does go in the way I could be happy I read it.. I got in again because I caught a glimpse of it.

[marinerainbow]

And Henry, (you bastard), I have 2 for you.

6- What is the hardest thing you've ever had to do? (I want to know what's hard for him, if abandoning a sweet woman and taking everything from her isn't! Very genuinely intrigued! ^^)

And 13- You're given an unlimited budget to build anything you want! What do you build and where do you build it?

-👠🐊👠

Ah, the bastard. We just need Ben to complete the set! XD

6. What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do?

"Me? Bah. Nothing's hard for me." The fox claimed, folding his arms over his chest with a smug smirk. His tail behind him was swishing similarly to a feline, "I just do what I gotta do. Ain't nothin' to it."

When you mentioned the name of a familiar face, that rabbit actress, his grin falters ever so slightly. He didn't think that nane would be mentioned again... Though his smirk quickly came back, and he just waved a dismissive paw, "Her? That was her name? I thought it was Posey or something- that was gonna drive me crazy all day, so thanks... But yeah, it took a bit longer, but she was pretty loaded for a while. Can 'ya blame a guy for sticking around?"

(Henry is a sly fox... But Poppy was the only woman he took his little 'I love you' scheme as far as he did. She was supposed to be a one night stand.)

13. You’re given an unlimited budget to build anything you want!  What do you build and where do you build it?

At this, the fox's eyebrows shot up in intrigue, "Whatever I want, eh? Unlimited budget? You tryin' to get me to run off with it?"

Henry laughed, but he didn't reassure it was only a joke. The toon leaned back in his seat and scratched his chin in thought for a quick moment, "Hm... A bar. A really nice one, too. All I gotta do is hire some staff and make sure everything runs smoothly, and cash will be flowing soon enough! Maybe I can convince that little thief at the club to pick pockets for me, too..." seeing the look on your face, Henry just scoffed, "What? You have any idea how many drunks there are in this town? I can bleed those assholes dry. You wanted honest answers, you got 'em!"

When Hebry finally managed to get away from this 'interview', or whatever it was meant to be, the fox let out a huff before reaching into his coat pocket and pulling out a photo.

The photo was of a little baby fox, all happy and smiling like nothing was wrong in his little life, while holding a big, fluffy brown chicken in his arms. Even though the fox in the picture and the fox currently holding it looked identical, it'd b difficult to believe they were the same person, "They must never know..."

(This is kinda a joke, but kinda not; Henry really wants that chicken farm XD)

Thank you for asking! It helped me develop Henry a bit more ^^ if you have any other questions, for Henry or my other characters, I'd love to hear! ^^

[pinkfloofytaur]

This is a little bit of writing featuring my characters and is meant to tie into the Korps universe. Setting by KorpsPropaganda.

Some time ago it was an auto shop but it hadn't been used as one in years. It stood abandoned and those few who stepped inside were there only for brief shelter or to rummage around for anything of even slight value. Whatever it may have once been called, whoever owned it, even how well it had done as a business were details lost to time, faded even more than the paint and decals that would have once caught the eyes of passers-by. As the rest of the city developed and advanced a little place like this was left in the dust and only accumulated more and more over the years.

But one unassuming day just on the cusp of evening a lone figure stumbled into the garage, a possum dressed in a tattered lab coat and a dirty speedsuit both of which were stained red with dried blood around where his right arm would have joined at his shoulder. He leaned against a wall as he slowly lurched forwards with unsteady steps of his bare paws.

"Keep going, this place looks safe enough."

The voice called out to him. It was familiar, comforting, he had no idea where it was coming from but in his current state he couldn't make out much of anything. He just did as it said and went further into the building. With a great deal of fumbling about he managed to find his way into a back room and collapsed into an office chair. Now that he a moment to breathe and rest it all began to come back, starting with the flash. All-encompassing green along with heat, a strong enough word for it didn't exist. It was a sort of heat that pierced through him completely, that would have boiled his blood if it had lasted any longer.

"The generator. The plan hadn't worked out so you took matters into your own hands."

The possum looked down at his one remaining hand. It was this one that he had used to drag himself away. There were alarms, the ground had been shaking, people were running. Dragging wouldn't have been fast enough, how..? Wait. He was lifted. It was her.

"You told them to get out of there, but they came back for you. I instructed them on where to take you."

The room. He could remember laying on a table with robotic arms hanging over him. But then the memories faded again.

"It was difficult to figure everything out at first, especially with the condition you were in. There was no saving your arm, I had no choice but to amputate. I managed to install a hookup for a replacement but there wasn't any there that would match your physique. A poor replacement would only put your body under further stress."

He swallowed and then replied, "I installed you to the facility's systems mainframe. But you're with me right now. I don't remember picking you back up. You're in me right now, aren't you?"

There was a brief hesitation. "Yes. In your new central neural implant. The software in this was not designed to handle coordinating the sheet amount of implants I had to put into you."

He nodded and shifted into a more comfortable position. With his understanding of the situation now up to his liking he let a grin form across his lips. "So, guess the best thing to do from here is just recuperate for a bit. Might want to come up with a plan for a new arm while I'm at it. Gotta have a scheme ready when we all get back together."

---

In another part of town a cat had been running for far longer than he's ever ran before and faster than he's ever been with no signs of slowing down. He was in too much of a flow to stop, scenery was blurring past him but he could somehow navigate every obstacle without fully processing that they were there. The only thing onlookers would see is electric sparks leaping off of surroundings and into a bright green blur that sped off into the distance as soon as it arrived.

All he could do was follow this speed as more and more energy welled up inside of him. As he approached a skyscraper he somehow knew he wasn't going to go around it, he needed to go up. Without breaking his stride he hit the wall of the building and began to run straight up along its surface. Upon reaching the led screen emblazoned with the company's logo all the electricity inside of it burst out and shot into the cat, turning the whole side of the building pitch black aside from his luminous green aura.

In a blink he launched himself further upwards and landed on an antenna array on top of the building. As soon as he touched the metal all of his accumulated electricity shot into the antennas and into the night sky, letting out a massive thunderclap and a flash of green. When the dark of the night returned the cat, still clinging to the structure, waved one of his arms in the air to see small sparks of electricity jump out of the air itself and into him. "What is this?" He asked aloud before looking around at his current position. "And how am I getting down from here?"

[anemodaycare]

could you do baby scaramouche with mama ei hcs? like, perhaps after reconciling he develops some separation anxiety when regressed and ei dotes on him like he’s a teeny tiny baby (0-1ish age range!)

With pleasure!! I've been waiting for an ask like this :) (for the sake of ease, Scara's color will be blue here and Ei will be purple)

Baby Regressor Scaramouche with Mama Ei Headcanons:

We'll say that this takes place after the latest archon event

Scara decides to do some serious soul searching, especially after being granted an anemo vision

And at the end of his journey, he finds himself back in Inazuma

Inazuma brings up icky memories for him, but he can't help the twinge of emotion in his chest when he stands near the Shogun's statue

Just as luck would have it, Miko is nearby and becomes the whole catalyst to the reunion and reconciliation

Naturally, she invites Scara to the shrine and invites Ei, both without the other knowing

Scara almost leaves as soon as he sees Ei

But, thanks to Miko, he stays to actually speak with the Archon

While he doesn't fully forgive her yet, he's willing to give her a chance

Which leads to Ei planning a big day out for them tomorrow

The following day, they meet at the shrine again

From there, Ei brings Scara around Inazuma, proudly speaking about it all

At some point, Scara feels himself starting to slip

It's something about being with his creator and her actually taking the time for him

So, he stops to sit on a bench, which Ei quickly takes note of and stops

She crouches in front of him and takes his hands gently

"Is everything okay, Kuni?"

"Told you... it's Scawa.."

As soon as he speaks, Ei knows what's going on

She read about this the night before, just in case

Well. She read a parenting book she borrowed from Miko. It's close enough, right?

"Do you want to go back home?"

Scara refuses immediately, instead making grabby hands for his mom

Ei picks him up with ease and they're off to finish their tour

Sure, people look, but they don't question their archon's doing

Ever since then, when Scara begins to regress he's quick to make his way over to his mother

If he's out of Inazuma when he regresses, he'll have his own mini panic attack

He has to reason with himself that his mom didn't abandon him again, that she's just in a different nation

But he'll make his way over as soon as possible

He's a very weepy baby

Ei loves to shower him with attention

She gives him all the time to be little, and if they need complete solitude she'll take him to her plane of euthymia

It's a lot brighter now, it's safe for baby Scara

Ei has a baby bag. She takes it with her whenever her and Scara are spending time together

She would absolutely get a baby carier custom made for Scara

She would get a lot made for him

The plane of euthymia now has a bunch of baby toys as well as furniture

Their favorite thing to do is people watch

Ei will keep Scara on her lap and just sit them in one of the densely populated areas

Miko takes pictures of them whenever she's around, so Ei has a big collection of those too

Worth mentioning, Ei shares her sweets with Scara

Scara loves dango milk, 100%

Either way !! Scara is finally getting to live his baby dreams with his mama

Which has been the only word he's uttered while regressed

It's not like he can't say more, he just prefers to babble

Ei cried when she heard him say mama so. Who's the real winner?

[omormoment]

Do you have any fanfic recommendations? I'm fine with any. If you have sunflower fanfics recommend that will be awesome

I haven't read anything in a while because I'm in reading slump right now but I can still give some recommendations from the top of my head. I'll try to summarize the fanfic the best I can.

Btw spoilers for OMORI below

Swim Against The Tide by tsukithewolf: Post bad ending. Hero-centric. Main ship is HeroMari but there's background Photobomb and Suntan. Hero goes back in time and is trying his best to figure out the reason Sunny had a fight with Mari and trying to prevent the accident from occuring. While doing so, he decided to spend more time with his friends and understand them. This one is my favorite.

The Bridge by 00cat00: Sunny told everyone the truth and they all need time. But Sunny can't wait that long so he decided to jump from the hospital building. When he wakes up, he realized that he went back in time where Mari is still alive. One of my favorites too. This one got me really emotional especially at the end. Made me cry.

Endless Dreaming: It's in the middle of True Ending. Sunny was about to tell everyone the truth but he suddenly faints. Everytime he's about to tell the truth, he'll pass out. Omori and headspace isn't gone. Omori drags Sunny into headspace to hang out with him. Sorry Idk how to explain more, I don't really remember anything from this fic because it's been a while. But it's a really good read.

Yurushite by @/misty-wisp : Post true ending. But the gang didn't forgive Sunny and he moved away. Sunny started to sleepwalk and wake up in the middle of the night. Later on he found out that Omori is still here and the headspace is decaying. Sunny decided to investigate headspace. (Sorry if this isn't as accurate as possible I don't remember much >~<)

Dreamscape by @/omoriboii: I'll be honest with you here, I haven't read Dreamscape yet. Best I can summarize is this AU takes place in a virtual world in a game. It uses the beginning half of the canon leading up to the 'incident' then completely diverging from then on. (Sorry Omo I didn't do this recommendation justice😔)

Deep Sea Reprieve: Sunny found a baby mermaid. His name is Omori.

Magician in the mirror by @/aria0fgold : A short fic where little Sunny met a new friend who was in the mirror. He calls himself a magician and can grant his wish. Sweet friendship between the two.

Here are some sunflower fanfics I like:

They say, flowers are meant to be sunkissed by whitheredahlia: Basil-centric. Sunny moved away and lost contact with Basil. Four years had passed and Basil managed to recover from being abandoned yet again with the support system that is his childhood friends and years of therapy. Unfortunately for the flower boy, fate seemed to have other plans for him when he's met face to face with the person he's sharing his college dorm with. This is my all time favorite sunflower fanfic.

Bloom Later by witheredahlia: Sequel to 'they say, flowers are meant to be sunkissed'. Focus more about their relationship. From the description: 'Sure, maybe the boy he developed feelings for was also the same boy he committed a crime with, therefore trauma bonding them for life. But no one ever said every relationship starts out perfect, right?'

Flower Language by @/mirror-to-the-past: Basil centric. An AU where Basil never met the group and Mari is still alive. Basically an angsty delinquent Basil story where instead of cowering away when people picks on him, he fights back. Yes, he did meet the gang soon and developing bond with them. This is one of the earliest sunflower fic I found when I was new to OMORI.

Sunflower seeds in the rearview mirror: 'Sunny and Basil decide to go on a road trip before the Summer Everything Changed ends—too bad Sunny has no idea where they're going. The only thing he knows is he feels warm around Basil.' This one is from Sunny's perspective and he's an unreliable narrator. This fic is a fucking poetry, it made me cry. The emotional roller coaster it gave me. Also one of the earliest sunflower fic I found when I was new to OMORI.

[navstuffs]

Favorite Mistake

Pairing: Steve Rogers x GenderNeutralAgent!Reader

Summary: You have been secretly meeting someone you shouldn't have.

Warning: songfic, mention of smut (i cant write smut yet), angst, AU fanfic, no use of y/n, Galaxy is reader's agent name.

Authors's note: im OBSESSED with Favorite Mistake by Giveon and i knew i had to write about it but DID NOT want to write about cheating. finally got this idea in my head and i'm gonna try to do justice to this smooth/perfect song. lyrics to the song are in italic while text messages are in bold. this might have a second part but i dont promise anything and idk when would come out

Are you on your way? Are you comin' soon to me?

The rain was hitting light against your bedroom's window. Weather Channel meteorologist had warned about rain all night, with chances of thunderstorms in the whole city. You played with your shirt, pondering if that was the right outfit choice, staring at yourself in the mirror. It was simple but effective. Modesty-wise, you looked good. Sexy almost.

You should have gotten used to this by now, but every time your phone vibrated with that message earlier in the day, you would get nervous. Like the first time you entered S.H.I.E.L.D, or the test to become an agent, or the first time working with the Avengers. You passed all those situations with honors so you shouldn't be technically so nervous.

Your phone vibrated again, startling you. You breathe deeply, your heart bumping into your chest. After attempting to unlock your phone two times unsuccessfully, you finally read the single message.

Are you ready?

Nope, you weren't.

-x-

Is my secret safe? Safe with just you and me We can't leave a trace This is my favorite mistake

You didn't look at your driver during the whole ride. You entered the car, fidgeting with your phone, reading past messages. What started a few months ago as a distraction, had developed into something more intense. Intense enough for you to be breaking S.H.I.E.L.D rules to fuck another agent. Intense enough for you both to keep coming back to each other.

Maybe this was finally going to be the last time. You knew this couldn't continue, you wanted to stop.

After forty minutes of driving, your driver stopped. You breathe deeply, feeling the driver's eyes on you through the rear mirror. Maybe this wasn't a new driver, at all. Maybe it was the same person who picked you up the first time. When you went back shaking head to toe to your apartment.

Your phone vibrated again and you jumped, opening the door of the car and getting out. As soon as you hit the car's door, the car went away, leaving you in the rain that was picking up stronger. You looked around the empty street, not one single living soul, and to the old building in front of you. Unlocking your phone, you read the message with a single number: 201.

Decided, you made your way inside the building.

-x-

Oh, look in my eyes Can you find the lies? Do you feel alive? Look in my eyes

You were in front of apartment 201 and your body suddenly turned into jelly. The building seemed completely empty, abandoned almost. Your reaction was dumb and you knew it since it wasn't going to be the first time but every time, every single time it felt like it. You didn't knock on the door, entering the dark room.

You could see his shadow sitting down in a chair, facing the window. He probably watched as you arrived.

"You took awhile" The man's serious voice greeted you. You ruffed, closing the door behind you.

"Well, I am sorry you got this place far away from everything. It is not like I wasn't ready when you texted arrived."

You gave a few steps inside the room. There was a big bed that didn't look old or dirty, with sheets clean, almost like new. The only window was the one he was sitting in front, facing against you in that chair. Looking at the bathroom, you knew you would have to wait to go to the bathroom in your house. At least, you wished you could pee.

"You gotta start looking for the ones with nicer bathrooms" You complained, a little louder than you should have.

You heard the man getting up from the chair, making his way towards you. Although you tried, always tried, your heart and your body betrayed every time Steve Rogers walked to you with so much intensity. You stood there, watching as he closed the distance between you two, the good Captain America facade completely gone. And you loved it.

"H-hey."

Steve didn't answer, his eyes scanning your body, your raincoat completely wet with the rain.

"Are you ready to take those off?" He wondered and you blinked. You nodded, feeling his warm hands helping you take your raincoat.

Steve was slow that night. You liked the slower nights since he liked to take his time. No rushing to the bed or not getting your clothes ripped. Not that you didn't like that, but it was nice when Steve took his time. You let yourself melt in his hand as he started rubbing your body. You didn't get that much rain but didn't realize how cold you felt before.

"Thanks, Ste- Captain."

Steve hummed in accordance. He positioned his face in your neck as he held tightly to you. How much you loved this: you knew it was wrong, you knew it was against the rules of what you had fought so hard to get in, but there wasn't any better feeling in the world. Getting fucked by Captain America himself in those dubious buildings, letting him give himself for you, for you only.

Steve's hand went to rub your hips for a second, then down to your ass, grabbing it. You held back a moan, distributing kisses on Steve's neck. How could he smell so good?

"No. Remember, I want to hear every sound," Steve warned you, grabbing one of your asscheeks more firmly. You let out a moan. "That is it."

Without warning, he lifted you up. Instinctively, you surrounded your legs around his hips, his hard-on pressing against your groin. You two stared at each other in the dark, your hands itching to rub his face but holding back.

"Are you ready for me, Galaxy?"

"Yes, Captain."

-x-

We both know it's wrong but you're still comin' over Even when you're gone the feelin' just grow stronger Should leave it alone but you're still gettin' closer

You probably slept an hour before waking up. It was still dark outside and the thunderstorm was hitting stronger. Steve was laying on your side, still naked, his body almost glowing in the dark, his hand lazily rubbing your back. He had his eyes closed, but you knew he was awake. He always woke before you. Super soldier serum.

"Are you good?" Steve wondered, his eyes still closed.

"Mhm." You answered, stretching your body. Except for a good pain in the middle of your legs that would last for a while, all the bites marks, and future bruises in your hips, you were feeling extremely good.

"Good," Steve replied, opening his eyes.

"Did you sleep at all?"

"A little bit. Not much."

A flash of lightning lighten up the room and Steve's hands went to hold your body, almost as if protecting you. Six seconds later and you could hear the thunder sound, Steve's rapid breath against your head. You welcomed his warm body against yours, laying your head against his chest.

"I didn't know Captain America was scared of lightning." You bit your lips, half smiling.

"I am not."

"Are you sure? I am not the one cuddling for support here."

Steve jerked away from you, suddenly getting up. Well, shit. You guys had been doing so well lately. You had the feeling you had gotten closer: Cuddling, talking shit, and telling jokes. He had been more Steve Rogers, reserving Captain only to the sex time. You watched as Steve put on his black underwear, standing with his back against you.

"Steve? You know I was just teasing you, I am so-"

"S.H.I.E.L.D. suspects of something." His voice deepened a tone.

Your heart stopped beating. What?

"They asked Bucky and Sam a couple of days ago. They had been pestering Natasha about us but she won't tell them a thing."

"Okay? Do you think they know about us? Did they ask you anything?"

"No. Not yet."

"I see."

You got up from the bed, rapidly dressing your clothes. You two kept those encounters so secret, that not even Steve's friends knew about the locations or when you met. You knew S.H.I.E.L.D was going to eventually discover anyway.

"Are you sure none of them talked? Are you sure?"

"Galaxy..."

"Don't Galaxy me, Steve Rogers. Are we sure?"

Steve placed his hands in your arms and gently turned you to face him. He was already fully dressed, the baseball cap the only thing missing. For a second you got distracted by the leather jacket Steve was using. You should have asked for him to leave it during sex.

"I trust my team with my life. If they say they didn't tell, they didn't." Steve's blue eyes stared at yours and you knew he wasn't lying. You nodded and he got closer locking your lips with his again. It was for a long second until you separated. "I don't want to stop with us. I still want to meet, if you want it."

You stared into his blue eyes for a second before turning around. You should finish this. It was doing no good to anyone since it had started. You two promise no feelings involved, no lovey-dovey shit but it had been getting harder to stay away. The meetings had been gotten more frequent and you knew you were reaching a new side of Steve you have never seen before. He was opening himself to you more and more, being vulnerable. You had to make a decision.

"I don't want to stop with us, as well. I like us. More than I should."

Steve let a relieved sigh as closed the distance between you two, his hands placing into your hips to turn you to face him. Steve seemed to be wanting to kiss you again but something seemed to stop him.

"I gotta go, don't I?" You wondered, watching his expression go cold.

Steve didn't answer, starting to involve you again. With his kisses, his hands, his body. You knew you needed to leave when your time was up, it was crucial for the relationship to continue, but it was getting more difficult to do so. You slowly got away from Steve's arms, putting on your raincoat.

"I will see you around, I guess."

"Be faster, next time."

"Find one with a nicer bathroom next time, Cap."

Steve smiled and watched you leave. He wanted to stop you, grab you back to the bed and make love to you, whisper dirty things in your ear, and cuddle until the morning, but he couldn't. He walked to the window, observing you enter the car to be driven away.

For a second, he stood there, feeling weak and sick to his stomach. He hated that you had to leave and he hated what he was doing to you. He walked towards his cap, finding the micro-headset in a secret compartment. Tony's doing. Steve put on his ear, turning it on.

"They are gone." He announced.

Two seconds passed when Sam's voice cut the silence.

"Are you okay, Captain?"

No. Not really.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just find stupid I need bodyguards now."

"For your own protection, Cap," Clint argued and Steve rolled his eyes. Like anything could hurt him physically, especially Galaxy.

"Steve, until we know what is the true Galaxy's deal if they are a traitor or not, I won't leave you alone." Bucky's voice sounded adamant.

"Neither me, Cap."

Steve shook his head, putting on his cap. Two days ago, Nick Fury and Tony Stark had a very particular and serious conversation about you possibly being a traitor. Both Tony and Nick didn't care about the relationship, but they wanted to know what was Galaxy's true motivation. They wanted to start slow because they understood how important you were to Steve. Steve didn't want to believe them.

Steve knew you from the first time you entered SHIELD. He watched you train, your face and posture always focused on the task ahead. You looked so terrified on your first mission together. Your desire to save and help people. Steve remembered you shielding a few kids with your own body against an explosion.

The first kiss he gave you, a kiss he had been wanting to do for a long time, his first kiss since Peggy. When you first shared a bed and Steve would always be ashamed to admit how rough he was with you that day, but he never realized how deeply he wanted you. Your face as he gave you orgasm after orgasm, your legs wrapped against his hips, begging for more.

He couldn't believe you could be a traitor.

Selling SHIELD's secrets for money. For the enemy. That wasn't you.

So now Steve had a mission. Every time he met you, he needed to try to get more information out of you. Analyze you. Save you from being a traitor. Steve knew you weren't. It was impossible.

He was going to prove it. He needed to.

-x-

Our secret's safe so you're my favorite mistake That's why we gotta keep it on the low

You entered your house, running to your bathroom. You needed to pee so badly, damn Steve not getting good places with clean toilets at least. Sure, it would be nice to have a nice shower. It would be nice to shower with Steve once.

You washed your hands, looking at yourself in the mirror, the recently fucked version of yourself. You were a mess. A mess that was more relaxed. You hang your raincoat to dry in the bathroom. Rain was going to continue for a few more days, so you needed that dry. You knew you were going to hear from your co-workers tomorrow. You knew it was just a matter of time until one of them had connected the dots between you and Captain America. The fast look that came from him. Or maybe it was your looks, he always faked so well.

You let your body fall into your sofa, grabbing your phone. You texted the same number Steve texted you earlier.

Home.

You were going to drop your phone to your side since he never answered from the same phone but was surprised to get a reply back.

I'm glad. Stay safe.

Strange. Steve never answered you from the same phone. He always used different numbers to text you. You shrugged, relaxing a little more before the so deserving shower before bed. You were going to sleep like a baby.

You heard the footsteps on your door running away, getting up to find an envelope on your side of the door. Grabbing it, you opened: an empty piece of paper. There was nothing written front in back. Nada. You ran to your bathroom, grabbed your raincoat, and ran outside, still dressing it. You had no time to lose now. When you received one of those, you had to always hurry. The rain was very strong now so you couldn't see anyone ahead but it was good like that. You rapidly made your way to the meeting point, a dark alley not far from your house, that smelled dead and rotten.

"Someone saw you?" A voice asked you in the darkness.

"No."

"You met him tonight."

"Yes. They suspect me." You confessed, your eyes scanning everywhere. You knew Steve's team had been around when you arrived. Sam, Bucky Barnes, and probably Clint Barton. You wondered if Natasha was up to this as well.

"As expected, eventually. What are you planning on doing?"

"I will do what was asked of me. You have my word."

"We shall see, shall we?" You felt the presence leaving and stood in the rain, alone. You had to act a little faster now.

[meg-eldaryaml]

The true route and Gardienne's personality in ANE

~I know some people get angry for some reason when someone talks about the true route, but whatever, I have to say this, if you don't like the subject keep scrolling~

I used to say that if Lance became a route, he'd automatically be the true route of the game because of the development it'd be tied to. Since they trashed all developments, now I see things differently.

Gardi got told her father was talking a lot about his daughter ever since 8 years ago, and he insisted on keep looking for her, he rebuilt her entire room to the slightest detail, and as nobody believed him, and his wife left him, he stopped talking about it and got very focused on his work. She asked if he did anything to find her, and Ignace said no. She assumed he gave up, he didn't care, and got really angry.

I take from this that she's biased on her father for the cold relationship they had before she ended up in Eldarya (making sense to The Origins, I'd also say she had soft thoughts about him remembering how they used to cook together sometimes, only because she thought she had lost him forever, now that she's back, only the memories of their cold relationship remain), and that her mind is now very black and white. Her dad wasn't around, she found him before he found her, she's not trying to understand reasons; he's a bad father.

Based on that, I can only say that the routes Lance and Leiftan are completely incompatible with Gardi. Sure, their routes exist, you can play them and have a blast (I sure do with Lance), but in my head, if the story wasn't based on the player's choices, the current Gardi, by the way she thinks, would never make room in her head to try to understand a villain, as much as they are making efforts.

Her father gave clear signs of caring so much for her: rebuilding her room just like it was before inch by inch from memory, trying to convince people to keep (not "start") looking for her to the point that his wife ended up abandoning him, and even after he stopped insisting, he still gave orders to receive her home if she ever came back, and kept talking about her to Ignace, he even drew her, so Ignace could recognize her, and as soon as she appeared he got people to look for her and pick her up whatever it costs (let's not forget she told Ignace she was captured)... if she didn't had the mind to try understanding her father, the fact that he had to work a lot to give her the life she used to enjoy, and the fact that Ignace literally can't remember if they were looking all over the planet for her before she drank the potion... she's in my opinion completely unable to be in a relationship with any former villains.

All the information is there for her to take it and understand him, but she's unable to, she can only think about how bad it felt for her before, and that says more to her than the new information.

This doesn't make her a bad person, though, she's completely in her right to think about herself. All the opposite, I'm glad she's finally caring more for her than the rest of the world, but it does take away all the empathy she used to have and was a key part of her personality. She used to care and try to feel for everyone, which was the reason the Fenghuangs offered her a place among them. The change from the first season to the second one sadly brought a whole change of view about the world, it used to be about grey areas, now it is a very drastic black and white situation.

Sure, I see it through Gardi, but just look at Lance and Leif, both of them are ashamed of their past, and only because they think they used to be completely wrong Gardi can now see them as something else. I'm pretty sure under the first season's point of view, they would still not be proud of what they did, but they would embrace it too as a part of them that they understand; now having a wider and wiser view of life, they can see why being on the good side is better. Personally, I loved the game for the old view, you can blame it on my growing up watching Star Wars kind of life, but it makes the new season too closed-minded for my taste (which it's a shame as my favorite route had to make bad propaganda for himself in order to fit the tastes of supervisor who didn't like him to start with, instead of the tastes of the people who were in love with him the way he was from the very start).

For now I'm divided between Nevra and Mathieu as for which one is the true route. Since we're on Mathieu's arc right now, everything is kind of made for people in his route, but it still feels very right to be in Nevra's route, it makes a lot of sense since they were friends/lovers before, but again, Mathieu is the one person Gardi can completely understand, and they sure have a great development so far, he's probably the only route who had a good development...

Let's wait for Nevra's arc to see if Math still stands.

[opal-nite]

delicate; b.barnes

chapter seventeen - “wouldn’t dream of it”

delicate masterlist

word count: 4.7k

synopsis: reader has a strange dream that ends up bringing on a cascade of various events and feelings.

pairings: bucky barnes x fem!reader

A/N: feel free to drop any opinions/thoughts/predictions below (or in my asks if u wanna be anonymous!!)

She would have woken up from a night's sleep saturated with regret... if she had slept a wink. She spent the night tossing and turning, and at about five in the morning, the pursuit of rest was abandoned.

Forcefully and exasperatedly, she sat straight up, glaring at the clock and letting the blanket pool around her waist. Y/N had her weekly meeting with Shuri at nine o'clock... that meant four hours to kill. More like four more hours of trudging through thoughts, memories, questions, and fears surrounding the previous day. Four more hours of ruminating over Bucky Barnes. This seemed to become a reoccurring activity her life.

She stared at the wall, thinking about how before, there was at least the excuse of being drunk: maybe not completely knowing what she was doing, maybe not remembering something correctly. But they were sober this time... she was sober. And what struck her was that, when it happened, when he kissed her, there was no moment of initial startle. There was no surprise jerk back or woah-what-are-you-doing response. Their bodies just fell into form. She just fell into form. Like it was an instinct. Like they were both used to it, and had done it a number of times before.

She wasn't sure what shocked her more: the fact that he kissed her or the fact that she kissed him back. Was he being bold? Or did she lead him on? Had she been leading him on? He wouldn't have done it on his own account, right? She had a degree of difficulty in believing she was wanted. Truly.

She could've sworn that she wasn't this emotionally invested. She could've sworn that if she couldn't control what she was feeling, she could at least control what she was doing. She rubbed her eyes, wondering where she went so wrong. It probably happened at some point during the isolated time she had been spending with Bucky in a secret corner of the world, not minding the least bit that she had been away from home and work for months whilst working on a project hardly anyone else was even aware of.

Even with all this in mind, she didn't seem to care. She didn't really mind that she hadn't been home in ages, it didn't really bother her that she might be in trouble when she gets back for helping enemy of the state Sharon Carter, runaway fugitive Steve Rogers, or war criminal James Buchanan Barnes. Because every time she thought about the consequences, it just didn't seem to matter more than what was keeping her in Wakanda... Besides, she guessed Bucky would probably be pardoned and after everything settled down, who would pay any attention to her? It's not like she mattered in the grand scheme.

As soon as that very thought arose, she could hear Bucky's voice scolding her in the back of her head. Why was he always there?

Frustrated, she groaned into the air in front of her. Her feelings were so confusing, she wasn't even sure what exactly it was she felt towards Bucky. On one hand, she felt fiercely protective over him: she'd go down fighting before she'd let anyone lay a hand on him, prepared to stay in his corner forever, ready on defense.

But at the same time, she felt this ineffable sense of warmth for him. Like one look at the way his eyes crinkle when he smiled, and she'd turn soft as water. Like being in his vicinity smoothed out the rough around her edges.

And if all this wasn't enough, now she had been touched by him, she had felt his lips and the gentleness in his skin. This brought a cascade of new feelings, ones she knew she had to hide. It... was definitely a problem. She knew, don't get her wrong, she knew it was a problem. As much as she understood this irrefutable fact, the numbness in her lips just wouldn't go away. He had remained with her even hours later. She couldn't get rid of his heartbeat; it was still in her hand. She could still feel him.

Basically, she knew this most recent development was an issue. She knew it was bad, wrong, worrisome, and whatever else. And knowing this, recognizing the very hot water she was in, the only thing she could focus on was trying to ignore the recurrent desire to be near him, to find him and be close to him.

"Fuck."

She plopped back down on her back and elected to cast a burning glare at the ceiling until she had to get ready for her meeting.

—

"I think it might be too hot for this," she complained with a smile on her face.

"It was your idea," he said, a few steps ahead of her, "and we're almost there, so buck up."

She laughed. He smiled at the sound.

"What?" he asked.

"You said buck up. Like Buck... Bucky. Like you."

He just looked at her, amused. Sun kissed and happy.

"It's fitting," she shrugged, grinning.

"Guess so. Hurry up, slow poke. You're gonna fall behind."

"I'm already behind," she huffed . "Your super soldier legs are too fast for me."

"Well," he stopped short and she finally caught up, standing right beside him, "we're here. So worry not."

He looked over at her to find her already looking at him. Funny how their eyes always found each other like that.

"What?" he asked again, not able to help how the corners of his mouth turned up just slightly.

"Nothin.’ Everything," she shrugged. "You."

Perhaps she just liked looking at him. Him and his long hair and light eyes. Was that such a crime? His skin looked caramelized under the sun. She wanted to reach out and touch him.

"You're a real peach, y'know that?" he smirked.

She looked away, pretending to find the grass around them spectacularly interesting while hiding a dopey smile at his compliment.

"Hey, doll face. I'm a lot more fun than the grass, I swear," he teased. "Lemme see my favorite face."

"Hold on." She got an idea.

She reached down beside her and plucked a flower from the soil.

"A little hibiscus," she smiled, tucking the small flower behind his ear. God, he was just so pretty.

She stood back, satisfied with her decor. She sighed, content. How couldn't she be? She was looking at two of the most beautiful things. Flowers and Bucky.

As soon as it was securely in place, Bucky bent down to pick the hibiscus that sat right next to the one Y/N chose. Mirroring her actions, he placed it behind her ear.

"A little hibiscus," he repeated fondly, "for a real peach!"

She didn't dare try to hide the next dopey grin while taking in the sight before her, of Bucky beaming in the sunlight with a flower in his hair. Looking at this, she understood why mankind began to paint. Why there needed to be someway to capture something as precious as this, some method of preserving something so idyllic and beautiful and pure and perfect.

Perfect like the cool, fresh water of the lake. Their lake. Their place. The flowing, breathing water she felt around her waist. They floated around, her and Bucky, as light as air in that lake.

The two were weightless, adoration suspended in animation. The water preserved the feeling of feather light kisses and chests pressed together and hands beginning to roam. If only she could be closer to him. Her fingers in his hair and his palms on either side of her face wasn't enough. She needed more. More, more, more of him.

Skin is so soft and the sun is so warm and soon enough, the water was up to her shoulders as his arms ran up her back. Arms plural, she noticed. He held her with both, protectively enclosing the longing feeling between them.

"Oh, fucking hell!" Y/N sprang up, throwing the blanket off of her.

She must've fallen asleep... and began to dream... She could imagine if her brain was a person, it'd be laughing at her for that.

Why? Why? What was the reason for this? There was no point! How frustrating! How embarrassing that her mind betrayed her with dreams of him.

"God damn it," she swore under her breath.

She wanted to angrily shake her fist in the air like vengeful cartoon character, as she got out of bed and headed towards her wardrobe.

It was 8 a.m. One hour until her meeting with Shuri. She would spend the time changing her outfit until it was distracting enough to draw her attention away from thoughts of that damn lake... and his damn hands...

—

"My friend!" Shuri greeted in her usual upbeat manner. "How are you? How are things?"

There was absolutely no way to answer this honestly.

"I'm doin' well. Same old, same old. How 'bout you?"

"Good as always," she smiled. "Thank you."

Y/N took a seat at one of the tables in Shuri's lab. "So how is T'Challa doing with Nakia?"

"Oh, who knows these days! He is so awkward, I have no idea!"

They both laughed. Y/N was glad she and Shuri were able to talk like this. They weren't just robotic colleagues who only communicated when they needed to. They were partners, and they worked well together.

The meeting commenced like it did every other week. Updates on Bucky's progress, new ideas or adjustments to treatment or planning, going over scans or data, you name it. But this time, she had something else in mind. Something that a dream reminded her of. She had mentioned maybe getting her hands on a prosthetic for Bucky. She wasn’t familiar with the prosthetics industry in Wakanda, but they could probably make something work.

Was that too much? Did she care too much? Was she showing too much regard for him? Was this too much to ask of her?

"Hey, remember a couple weeks ago when I talked about prosthetics?"

"Of course," Shuri smiled. She genuinely enjoyed her partner - her partner who was intelligent, confident, and articulate but still sometimes sounded shy. "You wanna see what I've been working on?"

"You... you ordered one? I didn't-"

"Oh, no. Not ordered. Just you wait," she said, pulling out a drawer to dig amongst papers. "I've been workin' my magic."

Shuri pulled out a manilla folder that had W.W. - Proj. 1 printed on it.

She dropped the folder in front of the psychologist who sat across from her, gesturing for her to look through it. Y/N opened it to see several pages of prosthetics research, information on cybernetics and various designs for a bionic arm.

"Oh... wow." Y/N marveled.

"What do you think?"

"It's incredible," Y/N shook her head. "I didn't- ... I thought you meant you bought one or something. I didn't know you designed one"

"I didn't just design it. I made it."

"You- what?"

"Yep. First model ready for use. Do you want to see it?"

"I'd love to."

Shuri walked her over to a large, rectangular case in the side of the lab.

"Holy shit," she let slip.

The arm was astounding: a glossy black with ridges etched in a shiny gold. It glimmered, sitting in its casing.

Shuri laughed. Thank you."

"Sorry. Excuse my French. This is... remarkable. Can I give it to him?"

"I suppose so. It hasn't got much use just sitting in my lab."

Excitement grew in her chest. Bucky would be able to have an arm he was in control of, one that wasn't forcefully attached to him and used as a weapon. In a way, he would be gaining a sense of autonomy. God, she wanted to see him right away and tell him the news. She was happy to make Bucky happy.

"Oh," Shuri perked her head up. "And there was something else I wanted to talk to you about."

"Yeah, what's up?"

"You're aware of the trigger words, correct?"

"Of course."

"I'm close to fully deconstructing the mind control, but there's no way to know for sure unless we test it out..."

Oh. The excitement dissipated and her stomach dropped. She didn't mean...

"You don't mean..."

"The effect and response of the words needs to be tested on him."

Oh God. There was no way this would be easy.

"And you need to be the one to do it."

Fuck.

"Me?" she tried to hide her shock, her worry, her now overwhelming urge to protect him. "How come?"

"It seems like he trusts you most out of everyone here. I consulted with the Doras about safety and we think that if something were to go wrong, it'd be safest to happen with you. Of course they'll be nearby, but you'd be the one mostly likely to be able to control him in that state."

Her mouth went dry. Control him? She could never. She would never. She knew, in depth, the anguish he carried in his bones as a result of being trapped as a weapon wielded by other people. The thought of her controlling him made her skin crawl.

She knew how much he feared the Winter Soldier and how he would hate losing touch with himself again. He's been free from this kind of violation for a while now; she had very much rather not take that freedom away.

At the same time, she understood how this test was necessary for a full recovery and rehabilitation. And who knows if the words will even work? Maybe she'll say them and nothing will even happen.

He would have to get over this obstacle in order to make it to the other side clean. She could only imagine how scary this would be for him. But she'd be damned if she wasn't going to be right there with him.

"Okay," she said dryly. "When... when are we gonna do this?"

"Not yet but soon. I'll keep you updated."

The rest of the meeting carried on as usual, but Y/N might as well have not even been there. Her mind was off. Off somewhere trying to think of how to tell Bucky the news. The very last thing in the world she wanted to do was hurt him. She'd take his place if she could.

—

As soon as she was free from the calm, professional facade she had going with Shuri, she found herself speed walking back to where Bucky was. She needed to get to him. Now.

When his hut was in sight, she was nervous. She was nervous before, she supposed. She just wanted everything to be okay.

"Buck," she called, a few steps away from the entryway. "I need to talk to you!"

When she stepped inside she froze in place, staring blankly at the two super soldiers in front of her instead of the one she expected. Two as in Bucky and Steve.

"Y/N," Bucky stood up. He sounded surprised.

"Oh-uh," she stuttered. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I can come back later."

"That's okay," Steve's voice was gentle. "I'll leave you... to it."

Steve threw Bucky a look she couldn't quite decipher before he left. Bucky just looked panicked.

And soon enough they were alone. They stood directly in front of each other, but with a noticeably awkward amount of space between them. The tiny part of her brain that was still mulling over the dream wanted him closer.

"Hey," he said softly.

"Hey..."

"You wanted to talk?"

"Yeah," she breathed. "It's uh... there's kind of a lot."

"Look, about yesterday, I-"

Oh. She completely forgot about that. Well, not completely. There was no way she could forget that. But, at the moment there were more pressing matters on her mind.

"It's not about yesterday."

"It's...not?"

"No. I have good news and bad news. Which do you want first?"

"Uh... bad news?"

She took a steady breath in. She wasn't sure exactly how to tell him, she just knew he needed to know. He deserved nothing but the truth.

"So, I was just with Shuri and we discussed the next step in your treatment..."

He said nothing, waiting for the aforementioned "bad news." She continued.

"Apparently, we have to test the trigger words on you..."

His expression dropped and she watched all the color drain from his face.

"I know. I'm sorry. I don't wanna do it, but we have to do it to see if it's really outta your head."

"Yeah, that's the problem," he finally spoke. "What if it's not? Then I hurt someone - or multiple people. There's gotta be some other way to test it."

"You're not going to hurt anyone. Or multiple people."

"How can you say that?"

"It's just gonna be the two of us."

"What?!"

"Shuri thought the safest way of doing this was for me to conduct the test. That way, if things ever got out of hand, which is very unlikely to happen, I'd be the best bet at... handling... that situation. Since you know me the best."

"No way. There's no way. I thought you meant they were gonna strap me down and have some lab tech read them. This is way too unsafe-"

"Strap you down? Bucky, no-"

He still saw himself as an animal that needed to be contained. Muzzled.

"What if I hurt you?" his voice shook just a little.

The fear in his eyes was potent. It made her angry. Angry at Hydra and whoever the fuck else had a hand in this sin against the kind and gentle man who stood before her. The man who was genuinely scared of himself. How dare they make him feel so unsafe within his own mind, within his own body. All she wanted to do was make it better, and suddenly, she could no longer stand for the distance between them. She stepped forward and grasped his hand between both of hers.

"I trust you, Buck," she smiled a small but earnest smile, letting him know that she truly was here for him. "Entirely. I promise. Okay?"

He nodded, still reluctant and entirely scared.

"Do you trust me?" she asked.

"I do. I trust you, I do," he cast his glance downwards, almost in shame. "It's myself I don't trust."

Her chest twisted with an emotion difficult to place. Mostly, it was the desire to take every ounce of pain away. She wished she could just snap her fingers and make it fade into nothing.

"That's okay," she said.

He looked back up at her, confused.

"You don't have to trust yourself. That's hard enough as it is and Hydra didn't make it any easier. You just trust me, alright? I'm the one reading the words, so, even though I'd hate it, if you were to be... activated... you'd be listening to me not trying to fight me," she squeezed his hand. "And I will not let anything happen to you."

"I'm not worried about me..."

She knew. She was not stupid; she knew that Bucky was separate from the Winter Soldier and that theoretically, the Winter Soldier - and only the Winter Soldier - had the potential to hurt her. She wasn't blind to the dangers, but she also wasn't blind to the fact that there was no exact science to brainwashing. Whos to say nothing could ever seep through the programming? She knew what happened with Bucky when he was forced to fight Steve for the first time. How it changed him.

Even though the Winter Soldier was in there, there was more of Bucky. She knew that for sure. And she needed to make sure he knew one thing: even if the Winter Soldier was trying to claw his way back and entire world was against him, she saw Bucky and trusted Bucky and believed in Bucky. She was a constant. And she wouldn’t give up on him.

"What, you're worried about me?" she joked, lightheartedly. She took the hand she was holding and pressed it against her cheek. "This wouldn't hurt me, James Buchanan."

He sighed, feeling the warmth from her face. He did not deserve this kindness and he definitely did not trust himself despite her trust in him. Of course Bucky would never hurt her. But Bucky wasn't the Winter Soldier. And he didn't have the heart to tell her what the Winter Soldier could or would do. He didn't have the stomach to even think about what would happen if the Winter Soldier actually did something.

But there was something about the way she believed in him, the way her conviction was so strong. It made him almost start to doubt these feelings. He could never be sure of everything being okay, but at least he could be sure of her.

"Okay," he whispered.

"Okay?"

"I'll do it."

"Alright," she smiled.

She removed his hand from her face, but still held onto it.

"And even if you did try to fight me, I think I could go a couple rounds in the ring with the Winter Soldier. I'm big and tough."

They both laughed knowing she had very minimal fight training.

"You'd definitely kick my ass," Bucky chuckled.

She just smiled. And then her eyes grew wide.

"Oh! You wanna know the good news?"

"F'course."

Bucky watched her briefly disappear through the entryway before returning with a big, rectangular case. He raised an eyebrow.

"That's good news? What is it, a bomb?"

"I don't do bombs... arson only."

The look on his face made her wonder if he actually questioned whether or not she was serious. She fought laughter as she opened the case. It was silent for a moment. Y/N looked at him, waiting for a reaction.

"Is that... for me?"

"All yours, Buck. A favor I asked of Shuri."

She told him about the arm. Told him about Shuri's design, and the features and functionality. She didn't mention what made her think to ask Shuri, but that surely wasn't important.

"It's really cool, and like super sleek and badass. But more importantly, it will make you feel more... I don't wanna say regular 'cause nothing about you is regular," a shy smile slipped. "But more... how you're used to having your body feel and function."

"That's..." he shook his head before looking up and making dauntingly deliberate eye contact. "Thank you. For thinkin' of me. I mean it. I hope it wasn't too much trouble for her to make it."

"Nothin's too much trouble, Bucky. You're worth it."

"You're a real peach, y’know that?"

Suddenly she looked abashed. Did he say something wrong?

"Sorry- I didn't-"

"No, it's okay. I just got a weird sense of déjà vu. Don't worry about it."

He looked at her like he didn't quite believe her, but she tried not to think too hard about it.

"So..." Bucky gestured towards the arm. "...what do we do with this?"

"You wanna try it on?"

His brows shot up. "Oh! I mean- sure- I guess so, yeah."

She tried to pick it up and nearly threw her back out. "Jesus!"

"Woah there, tiger," he withheld a laugh, putting a hand under the vibranium arm to hold most of its weight.

"Okay, sit down," she ordered, both of them fumbling to hold onto the arm. "Shuri told me how to get the arm on. There's some... magnetic thing. I don't even know - it was some complex engineering lingo. Not my field."

After a couple minutes, clumsy hands attempting awkward assembly, and several curse words later... the arm was attached. They both stood as Bucky stuck out the bionic arm, admiring it and Y/N leaned back, admiring him. Wow.

Bucky smiled, holding both his forearms out - palms facing up - to see how they moved. "This is incredible."

He turned to her. "You're incredible. Thank you."

"No problem at all," she stepped forward. "How does it feel?"

Her hands found their way below his, cupping the underneath of them with a feather light touch. "How do you feel?"

"More... balanced," he laughed. "Coordinated?"

"Steady?"

"Absolutely."

"Stronger?"

"Definitely."

She looked up at him. "Confident? More comfortable in your own skin? That's what's most important."

He gripped her hands. "For sure. Thanks to you."

"Glad I could help. Just wanna make you feel more like yourself, you know?"

"I feel the most like myself when I'm with you," he nearly whispered.

He smiled, and then did something... unexpected. He let go of one of her hands and with the other, he twirled her around as if they were dancing. She went along with the movement, body falling in sync it even though she was confused.

"You make me wanna dance again."

With his voice so endearing, and his heart so spirited, the world around them fell quiet. She stepped forward and rested her hand on his shoulder. Then she placed one of his hands on her waist, and held the other out to the side, fingers intertwined with hers. And oh, the feeling of his hands on her; it was nearly overwhelming.

"Then dance."

And they swayed. They swayed to nothing, to the sweet sound of finding comfort in another person. She let her eyes flutter shut, allowed her guard to come down for just a moment. Just this moment. With him.

Bucky broke the silence with a shy question. "So yesterday... what does that mean for-"

"Let's just keep it between us."

"What do you mean?"

"It was a moment - like this one. I think I think too much, and I may have overreacted before. It doesn't have to be some cumbersome ordeal. It's just us."

"We're good then?"

"We're good."

"Good. 'Cause I like this."

She inhaled and smiled at the feeling of him inside her lungs. They continued swaying as they continued talking.

"You were in my dream you know?"

"Was I?"

"You were."

"Could I fly?"

"No," she laughed. "You were - well we, actually, were walking to that lake."

"To swim?"

Not exactly...

"I don't know. It's kinda foggy and didn't make much sense since it was a dream but we were definitely there."

"Did I say anything existentially insightful?" he joked.

"I don't remember much of what we said, but I remember how it felt."

"How... how did it feel?"

There she went again. She could feel herself slipping, but found it hard to care. She closed her eyes, thinking back to hibiscuses and Bucky's arms.

"The water and sun on my skin felt kind of like this," her hands ran up his sides dangerously slow and settled behind his neck, finger tips tangling into the ends of his hair.

His breath faltered. "Is that so?"

Unconsciously, his other hand found her waist and somehow the little space between them grew even smaller.

"Mhm," she hummed. "and the sight of a flower in your hair felt kind of like this."

Her hands moved to cup his face, the soft skin of her palm settling on his jawline.

"It was so pretty," she sighed.

"Yeah... pretty," he agreed. But he wasn't talking about the dream or the flower.

"And... your arms and your hands... felt kind of like this."

Gently, she pulled his face down to hers, though he needed no guidance or encouragement. When their lips met, that feelings of incompletion and longing, which had been prickling the back of her mind since the previous day, finally went away. They dissolved into fingers pressing into her hips, soft stubble tickling her cheek, and the delightfully encompassing presence of him.

She wasn't sure how long it was until they separated and words were spoken again. All she really recognized what that she was out of breath.

"And to think I was going to apologize for yesterday," Bucky smirked.

"I had to return the favor."

"And I gotta make up for lost time"

"Well, please don't let me stop you."

And he didn't. They continued right where they left off, except this time, it felt much too similar to something she had felt before. Hands began to roam just like they did in her dream.

The only thing was, her dream was cut short. She had no idea how it ended. But his hands were everywhere and it was all her senses could register. He was everywhere: her lips, her neck, her collar bones. She was burning.

The air ran out of her chest, and her voice was barely a breathy sigh. "Don't stop."

She could feel his smile on her skin. "Wouldn't dream of it."

-

The next morning, she awoke entwined in his arms - both of them.

delicate taglist: @bakugouswh0r3 @thefridgeismybestie @strivingforelegance @ilovespideyyy @xpurpleglitter @bluelakeee @darkacademic2 @nickkie1129 @eclipsedplanet @paradisedixon @crazy-beautiful @coffee--writes @lilithknight1111 @buckybarnesishot310 @softladyhours @alwayssandy @those-sea-green-eyes @hero-ically @devilswaldorf @cc13723things @small-death-and-codeine @avengersgirllorianna @cataves @thatbitchsposts @talktomeaboutthestars @surrealpsycho @headheartbellarke @bubbly-moonwarrior @bluemoon-icecream @buckeyecreates @augustbucky @itsthemaree

[mrsmarymorstan]

Don't why the fans especially the manga readers are hyping about tooru breaking the curse when she didn't even do shit. she just went on that silly adventure and be an annoying crybaby whenever she learns something new about the curse. it was actually akito who broke the curse so i can't understand what you are all hyping tohru on.

Ah yes, I to remember the days when I’d be deliberately antagonistic just for fun and beat on female characters for showing emotions and caring about people. Or indeed, resent characters for having entirely realistic reactions to the cosmic horror and terror that surrounds them. Then I turned 16 and HER WE ARE ten years later and I get to see it from a whole new perspective! What fun. 

In your misguided attempt to cause drama by shitting on people having a good time by being excited about upcoming character moments, much like Dr Flemming’s unwashed petri dish, you have hit upon something that benefits further discussion and interest. 

That point being, was it TOHRU who broke the curse, or was it Akito? 

The answer, I believe, is both. SPOILERS FOR ANIME ONLIES TONY YOU ARE WARNED DO NOT @ ME AGAIN IF YOU MESS UP. 

When Tohru sets out to break the curse and stop the love of her life from being locked up in a cold dark room for the rest of his existence, she finds out that the curse is firstly, a bond of blood sworn by the spririts of the past and not something that can be physically manifested, and secondly, that the curse has already begun to break RE: Kureno. 

Now, there’s a LOT of theories about why Kureno’s curse broke and if it truly was some random event or if there was a trigger. I think it’s a combination of the two. It’s noted by the maids and by (I think) Shigure that this is the first time in a long time that the entire Juunishi are present. There is also a sizeable age gap betwee Hiro and Kureno, that would about match up between Hiro being an infant when Kureno’s curse broke. Ergo, I propose that his curse broke soon after their first New Year’s together as a complete banquet with no spaces missing. Save that of the cat, of course, but more on him later. 

Kureno is the rooster, and I believe that in legend the Rooster was seen as the closest to God because he could deliver messages between heaven and earth. Therefore it makes sense that the first to leave God alone, is God’s messenger. “We have had our final Banquet, it’s time to end the cycle.” 

Of course Akito/God does not have a positive reaction to this, and the loss of one Juunishi inspires a great sense of loneliness and fear within Akito similar to that which lead to the creation of the bond in the first place. We do not see God being willing to make any attempt to work on achieving the Cat’s wish of finally being able to form friendships beyond the Zodiac and forming bonds with the humans he was so afraid of before. 

And THAT is the crux of the matter. Tohru came into the Sohma’s lives and began to break the curse simply by forming close bonds with them all, and letting them into her life and react to the world around them. Hana and Uo are both friends with Kyo and Yuki, actively choosing to spend time together. We also see that in Kyo attending the same school as Yuki, it opens up that same school to Haru and Momiji where they too can form bonds outside of the Sohma influence. It’s a school THEY chose, not the single sex one Akito picked out. Equally this means we have to give some credit to Yuki for making the brave choice of defying his parents and Akito’s wishes by attending a mixed school, and Shigure (who continues to be the mastermind here) for goading Akito into allowing Kyo to also attend that school and not simply pay off the private school he was MEANT to attend and have them let him back in. 

It’s also no real surprise that the two other Juunishi whose curses break before the final scene are Momiji and Hiro. Hiro is shown to be forming bonds outside of the Zodiac too. Not only has he matured enough that he is able to understand things from Tohru’s perspective now and has a relatively positive relationship with her, he ALSO becomes a Big Brother with a little sister he adores. Again, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that his curse breaks whilst he is in the same room as her. The Sheep has formed a meaningful relationship outside of the Zodaic, so it is time for the Sheep Spirit to return to its original realm. We then have Momiji, who is absolutely desperately in love with Tohru and is also equally desperate to be allowed to have a relationship with his OWN sister. Momiji’s curse breaks only after he has gone through puberty though and reaches adulthood. It’s when he starts to truly understand the path that is laid before him, and where he stands in it. He WANTS a relationship with Tohru, but he can also recognise that she is in love with Kyo and that makes it all the more painful. He knows that as he ages he is only going to be made to feel more distant from his sister, and that hurts too. HOWEVER, Momiji doesn’t ever stop LONGING for meaningful relationships and a world beyond the life of the Zodiac. He recognises that he does not have anything really tying him to the Sohma anymore, and so his curse breaks. The rabbit spirit has no need to be part of the banquet, and so heads home.   

Now, as you can see, whilst Tohru is a key trigger in the breaking of the curse, she’s still not the one to actively do it, right? 

Well, wrong. Sort of. 

Take note that when we’re told the ACTUAL story of the Original Banquet , we find that the Cat was the first friend God ever made, and was also the first to die. It was the death of the cat that triggered God into creating the eternal bond that would always bring them together, and it was the cat’s terror and dismay at being forced into such a bond that caused them to disown him. The cat has, all along, simply wanted God to make friends. The first who had the curse take effect upon them, was the one who rejectd it the most and as such was then shunned forever more. The cat wanted God to make bonds outside of the Zodiac, and in turn the cat was forever banned form making those bonds. Even though we’ve been show the Cat was granted some realtionships in the form of Kazuma’s Grandmother; it is a relationship made out of pitty rather than love and understanding. 

Tohru though? Torhu is the God Damned (excuse the pun) Year of the Cat Fanclub PRESIDENT. Nobody loves and respects the OG Cat Spirit in the way she does. She emphasied with the Cat’s plight in the legend her mother told her, feeling sorry for them being tricked like that and being forced to miss out on being part of the legend. She wanted the cat to join the group! She cradled the cat’s body in much the same way God in his final moments, as instead this time Tohru brings him back into the light and forms a stronger and longer lasting relationship with the cat spirit through love and empathy.

And later on, in that same mountainside, it is TOHRU who is the one who reaches out her hand to god and asks to become friends. It is the act of God forming friends with mortal humans that triggers Akito/God to finally release everyone from their curse. That’s why it happens when it does, when Akito knows that Tohru is safely out of hospital, that she has still welcomed Akito into her life... and that if Akito is going to take those terrifying steps into forming relationships that can end in rejection, she’s going to have to do it on her own two feet. 

THAT is how Tohru breaks the curse. THAT is what is important here and what is so FUCKING HARD ROCK about Tohru Honda. We see her willing to stand up to GOD in order to break the curse, but she stands before God as an EQUAL. Tohru WILL break the curse. She WILL fight for her soulmate. She WILL make you be friends with her and address your deep seated issues of self hate and abandonment (not that she has those issues herself ahahahha no I’m just your average happy go lucky teenager with two dead parents who lives in a tent I’M FINE) 

Of course, it turns out that everything Shigure and Kazuma told her about breaking the curse was true: That she didn’t have to do anything other than to continue to be herself. HOWEVER, in order to BE herself she needed to try and have a “silly adventure” where she tested her metal and learnt to speak up for herself. Why are we excited? Because we’re going to see Tohru finally find the confidence to speak out against others without harm! We see her get into a fight with Rin about it. We see her refusing to back down against Kagura. We see her standing on her own two feet and saying “No. No I don’t want that. I REFUSE to give in and to leave well alone!” 

All before, Tohru has been so scared to speak up for herself because of her debilitating abandonment issues (and please let’s not make fun of people’s mental health issues, okay? I haven’t been having a weekly therapy session for nearly two years now just because for the fun of it) but now she’s got to the point where she feels comfortable and secure enough to show an uglier side to herself that people might reject. She is able to be mean, and shout, and fucking break into someone’s house in order to get what she wants! How can a TRUE fruits basket fan NOT be excitd for that level of character development? 

And to end it, please, for the LOVE OF GOD it is 2020. I am 26 years old. I have been on tumblr since 2011. Do not send me hate about female fictional characters and expect me to roll over. My username is “Mrs Mary Morstan”. Mary. Morstan. The most hated female character in all of BBC Sherlock. Do not even try to fucking test me, you Petri Dish. 

[bbq-hawks-wings]

Chapters 301-302: Do as I Say, Not as I Do.

One of the biggest struggles as a parent is living out the example you teach your kids; and if Rei and Enji had been able to do that they might have been able to save their family and all those caught up in the carnage today a lot of grief. As much as this is the entire Todoroki Family's flashback, it mostly belongs to Rei, Enji, and Touya who took the brunt of their failure as parents and had the most spectacular fall because of it.

Both of them dearly loved their children and hated to see them suffer, but they were unable to face themselves and each other to build a strong foundational relationship on which to act as an example.

Their relationship was one based on a literal transaction - not love, not even mutual respect. It could have been salvaged long before things became irreparable, but neither of them were able to step beyond the confines of the conception of their union and grow it into anything more.

Because Enji's goal always came first and Rei didn't have the courage to put her foot down for even her own children's sake, it spiraled out of control into the blazing hellfire that left all of them scarred for life.

And to be clear, Endeavor is the one predominantly to blame for this scenario as he held almost all the power in the relationship. He was the one with the money and means of provision, and if he decided to abandon Rei and her kids she would have to hobble back home to a family that would berate and guilt her for the rest of her life for being useless, a failure, and a burden since they rested their financial stability on her to keep them afloat and now not only would have to care for her on tightened belts, but possibly the children she brought in tow.

So while her hesitancy to do anything to oppose him is beyond understandable she herself also owns that she fully knew she was enabling him and was personally familiar with the pain her inaction caused her children - going as far as to say she didn't deserve the title of "mother."

With a foundation of, "the only reason we got married and had children is to realize Enji's goal of becoming the #1 hero vicariously through them" their insistence that the kids could find something outside of being a hero and still have their love and respect is rendered invalid. Rei says as much when he brings up conceiving another child once he realizes Touya chasing his dream would result in his eventual death.

Children are smart and perfectly capable of following or developing logic with the facts they have. Touya picked up immediately that his parents started having more children as soon as he was deemed unable to fulfill Enji's wish and stopped having them as soon as he got what he wanted.

What Touya wasn't able to recognize was that this was Endeavor's way of trying to have his cake and eat it, too - have a baby that surpassed All Might AND not destroy his favorite child. He was not able to piece together that his father was trying to save him from his quirk because Touya's foundational concept for his parent-child relationship with Enji was, "realize my dream and make me proud." If Endeavor had been able to stop all together and say, "Gaining my dream is not worth losing you," and embrace his son disaster could have been avoided.

He just couldn't let it go.

Every time Touya tried to lean in on what he'd been taught and what was being shown to him (the promised child gets my attention) Endeavor leaned in further to the negative reinforcement of ignoring Touya and distancing himself from him which was only fuel upon fuel upon fuel to the fire.

Endeavor can't face Touya because he can't let his dream go, and he runs away from his responsibility as a father and puts in on Rei instead. Rei tried to step up at that point, but by then Touya refuses to listen to her because he can't respect her with the foundational relationship he knows his parents have with each other. When Rei can't make him stop, Endeavor doubles down on both her and Shouto, becoming physically violent in the process. Rei's mental state continues to deteriorate until she can't even see her own children anymore past their father who has them all trapped in this nightmare. Touya tried to lean on his siblings but dismisses Fuyumi who can't see his perspective, places a double emotional burden on Natsuo who is being hit on all fronts as the middle "failure" child, and resents baby Shouto for even being born. Shouto, Fuyumi, and Natsuo are forced to live a vicious cycle of screaming, abuse, and neglect as they can see their family unraveling at the seams but are completely powerless to stop it.

Touya lashes out at first, then withdraws into his own self-guided training, and eventually snaps when he reaches his breaking point that absolutely nothing he can possibly do will be able to bring his father back to him; and Touya dies in the flames of his own agony taking over and engulfing him alive. Though he somehow managed to survive the accident, by all accounts the little boy that Touya was dies that day; and the effects of that loss ripple through the family to the present day.

At what point after this he became Dabi I'm not sure. He's worked with Dr. Ujiko since then, but the details of their arrangement is unclear. Fuyumi and Natsuo have done their best to simply move on and create their own lives since then; and in a twist of fate Endeavor's insistence that Shouto continue hero training puts him in a school and in a class where he begins to make friends and find a support network that encourages him to begin to choose his own paths in life which also leads him to reaching out to his mother again. In the wake of the house of cards that is Hero Society crumbling with the fall of All Might, Endeavor has finally had to face the reality of his inadequacy and the evils be inflicted on his family.

By the time they're in the same room together again for the first time in years, all of them are different people. They all still have the same memories and the lingering feelings are strong; but what brought them together is also what tore them apart - Dabi, who is also not the same person he was when the ashes of this family came crumbling down.

They feel that the house who birthed this monster must have a significant hand in bringing him in and saving the public. This isn't a family issue anymore, and even if not every member of that household holds responsibility for what Dabi's become all of them want to do something to put out the fire that's now spread to the rest of the country.

[i-see-you-have-good-taste]

Misaeng episode 1

overview & analysis

"A path is not simply for walking. Its purpose lies in moving forward and improving oneself. A path that fails to do so is not a path. The path is open to everyone but not everyone can walk it". -Jang Geu-Rae.

Profound words uttered by the young intern, whose life the show revolves around. Opening with this overhead narration, the camera sweeps over a rocky terrain and cuts to a man in a suit walking through a valley.

We are in a town where the shops seem to have their names in Arabic. A quick search on google reveals that this show was the first Korean drama to film on location in Jordan. Our protagonist embarks on a wild chase through the busy streets in pursuit of an absconding client. It ends with him mid jump off a building and leaving me half off my seat. I do hope he makes it, but I guess I will have to wait till the end off this show to find out.

We are now taken back to 2012, the humble start of our protag's journey. We see 26-year-old Jang Geu-Rae, forced to do odd jobs, cleaning a public bath mirror with much vigour. Told to man-up and find a steady job, he wipes the mirror to reveal his dejected (and pouty) face.

Somehow, (and both the audience and Geu-rae are kept in the dark about this), he scores a prestigious internship. Though his mom insists she pulled no strings, over the course of the episode Geu-rae and the rest of the employees find this increasingly hard to believe.

Well into the episode, the circumstances of Gue-rae's barren resume are brought to light. Sacrificing a normal life, and a degree, to pursue his passion for Baduk (The game of go), he might have been a professional player. However, despite having the talent, he was dealt an unfortunate set of cards and had to play those instead. Failing to win the final deciding tournament, he is now forced to enter the corporate world.

"I don't want to hear that I lost because of my lack of skills or I was unlucky enough to lose by only half a territory. It's not because I did both baduk and a part-time job. It's not because my parents couldn't financially support me. It's not because my dad passed away, or my mom got sick. Those excuses break my heart. It's better to say I didn't work hard enough. It's not true, but I would rather think that. Because I didn't work hard enough, I had to come out into the world. Because I didn't work hard enough, I was abandoned."

What pleased me was that they didn't bring in the 'crushed hopes and dreams' plot device at the start. They introduced it as another character trait of our protagonist. Rather than defining the story, it is used to define the character and pave the way for his future development and character arc.

Though the efforts are minor, Gue-rae tries his best to step it up at work. He is further driven by the return of the boss of their sales team, Oh Sang-Shik. Oh seems to be the only one mildly amused by Gue-rae's incompetence. Oh tells Gue-rae to convince him to keep him on the team. Cue Gue-rae trying his best to use his skills of Baduk to organise computer files.

I sense bonding. I also forsee a potential 'inspirational mentor'.

The interns, much to their dismay, are rounded up and sent to a factory to make up for a shortage of manpower. Their higher ups needed them to check a shipment of fermented squid to ensure that there were no octopuses thrown in for good measure. Having marketed squid, they needed to ensure the client received just that, and Oh opened his gop and insisted they would check manually.

The interns make their dismay known and snidely look in Gue-rae's direction while saying there were people more suited to the job.

At the factory, all but Gue-rae have partners to work with. Of course, they run out of protective covering and a few of the interns, including Gue-rae, have to carry out the task in their suits. In trying to avoid getting squid gunk on the new suit his mother gifted him (He doesn't know she bought it on interest which makes it worse), he drops his phone in the water, busting it completely.

Oh calls one of the interns to inform them that the supplier owned up to adding the octopuses and would take the product back so they needn't continue looking. They leave without telling Gue-rae, who is absorbed with the work in a truck on his own.

By the time the factory owner notices he is still there, we are in as much pain as he is. The situation is so depressingly pathetic but tailored to assure us that from here on out he is only going to move forward in his development.

He stands in front of his colleagues outside the restaurant, covered in squid juice and quite stinky. They laugh it off as a joke, saying he was working so hard he didn't even pick up his phone. An obnoxious intern tells him to keep working hard.

Oh arrives and as soon as he sets eyes on Gue-rae, wonders what the hell happened. It looks like a whirlwind hit the guy (if the whirlwind was of wet squid ). Gue-rae tells Oh he will go back to the office to redo the files that Oh was unhappy with. Oh kindly tells him to leave it for the morning but squid boy insists he will have it ready by morning and turns to leave.

As Gue-rae walks away the words carelessly uttered by the obnoxious intern nag him. We are brought back to the lie he clings onto so desparately. "Did I work hard today? No. I didn't work hard enough so I was forced to come into this world. Because I didn't work hard I was abandoned.

Interestingly, we learn more about the skills Gue-rae lacks through the other interns. Those who have fought to get to the top brandish skills like efficiency, multilingual chops and cunning. Leaves us wondering exactly how Gue-rae is going to turn into the suave employee we see running around in the start.

We are made painfully aware of how hard the interns had to work to beautify their resumes, only to face unfairness, discrimination and other wonders of an office workplace. While giving us a realistic peek into a workplace, the drama enlightens us as to the challenge, intrigue and delight it offers to those who aimed to get there.

[belphiesreverie]

Blood Money

@helenapizzatime it is here. My baby has been created. Also, why does everything I write end up as a yandere scenario. Like I wasn’t meaning to make this a yandere fic... but it just happened uwu

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Your phone had been ringing for 20 minutes straight at this point. It had been cast aside after the third time he tried to ring you, surely he would've gotten bored of trying to reach you by now and yet here you were still trying to ignore his calls. Normally, you would've gotten up to silence it, but you honestly couldn't be bothered to move; that and you were also not looking forward to seeing the barrage of texts that he’d left in between calls.

Who was it that was so insistent on reaching you? It was Bruno. He had been your sugar daddy for a good 7 months but you had decided to break off the arrangement last night since you had gotten a proper boyfriend. Bruno wasn't too fond of the idea of sharing you, so instead of staying with him for the money, you had decided to get a proper job and live a normal life with your boyfriend. Bruno was a great person and you enjoyed his company (and money) but you didn't love him like you did your boyfriend. It was quite obvious to you that Bruno had developed an attachment to you, but it wasn't a healthy lifestyle to lead for either of you.

Your initial plan was to leave him be for a couple of weeks and let him move on to someone else, then you could talk to him again because you did genuinely consider him a friend. However, with how much Bruno had been trying to contact you for the last few minutes, you assumed that would not be happening. If you wanted to actually use your phone, you'd have to talk to him to get him to stop calling you every three seconds. Blocking his number wasn't an option because he’d know immediately and just get a new phone to contact you with. You getting a new phone yourself was also out of the question since you didn't even have enough money to buy food.

Bruno had been smart enough to take all the money he had been feeding into your account out as soon as you told him you didn't want to see him anymore so you couldn't use his own money to stop him from contacting you. The apartment you were also staying in at the moment was under Bruno’s name so it was only a matter of time before he either showed up at the door or you got kicked out. That was why you were currently waiting for your boyfriend to come pick you and all your belongings up from the apartment. You were expecting a reaction like this when you broke the news to him, so you’d planned ahead that you would move into your boyfriend's apartment and get a job to help pay rent.

The minutes of waiting for your boyfriend to arrive had felt more like hours as you listened to the ringtone of your phone repeat over and over. At one point you thought you’d managed to finally tune out the ringing, but it turns out that your phone had just stopped. Bruno had stopped calling you. With a sigh of relief, you lifted yourself off of the sofa and moved to the kitchen where you had abandoned your phone earlier. Upon turning on the screen, there was a blockade of calls and messages all from Bruno within the last 20 or so minutes. The calls had racked up to 83 and the texts were even more with a total of 174. At first, you wondered how he managed to do all of this in the span of 20 minutes but your train of thought was quickly taken to the messages he had sent you.

The first few were quite normal, simply saying to ”answer the phone” and ” I just want to talk to you”. Then, the messages became desperate with him saying things like ”please, I need you”, ”can we work this out?”, ”I’ll buy you that necklace you wanted” and ”I don't understand what I did wrong, please talk to me”. However, the most concerning messages were the majority that had been sent most recently: ”you can't leave me, I won't allow it”, ”I’ll find you wherever you go”, ”you don't know what I'm capable of” and a series of other threats.

Your heart nearly jumped out of your chest as another text came through your phone. Luckily, it was just your boyfriend saying he was almost there. You quickly responded saying that you’ll see him soon before switching off your phone and throwing it back on the counter. Moving back into the living room, you tried to occupy yourself by watching some tv, but your mind kept drifting back to the messages Bruno had sent, or one in specific.

You don't know what I'm capable of.

Throughout the entirety of knowing Bruno, he had always been a calm and composed person. He never yelled at you or anyone else for that matter; the worst you got was a light scolding if you didn't answer him right away or injured yourself. Thinking back to all the texts he had sent made you wonder if that was there real Bruno. You certainly didn't need to hear the threats to know that he meant them all. Yet, just that one text made you subconsciously shiver. Never did Bruno ever mention how he made all his money, and you certainly didn't care enough to ask. You remember him saying that his line of work was dangerous, but paid well. At the time you didn't put much thought into it, but now it seemed like a red flag that could've saved you all this trouble if you had only paid attention to it.

A brisk knocking at the door snapped you out of your worries. Bruno didn't know where your boyfriend lived or even what he was called so you knew there was at least a small amount of safety from him for a little while. Quickly hopping up from the sofa, you practically ran months door and opened it up without even checking the peephole. That was your first mistake.

On the other side of the door was not your boyfriend but instead the person you wanted to see the least right now. Bruno. He had a gentle smile on his face but just looking into his eyes you could see the anger that was threatening to escape. Your immediate instinct was to try and close the door on him and find another way out of the house, but you were so caught up in your surprise that you were a split second too late; he had already pushed his way into the apartment.

“I’m sorry to arrive unannounced but you weren't answering my texts or calls. I really need to talk to you, Amore.”

His tone was sickeningly sweet as he held the smile on his face. You tried to back away from him big he caught you by the arm and dragged you into the kitchen. Trying to pull away was useless as you knew he was stronger than you and resistance might provoke him to lash out. You had never seen Bruno like this so he was completely unpredictable to you.

Bruno effortlessly pushed you into one of the barstools in the kitchen before effectively trapping you by placing his hands on either side of the bar behind you. His face was inches away from your own. This upclose, you could see the tension in his face as he tried to stay composed and not snap at you.

“So, you mentioned you didn't want to see me anymore because you have a boyfriend, is that correct?”

Too afraid to use your voice, you simply nodded in response.

“Well I already solved that problem for us. You see, when you take the boyfriend out of the equation, then you no longer have a reason to not see me!”

“What... What do you mean? What did you do to him?”

“Were you not listening? I got rid of him.” Bruno makes a slicing motion with his hand across his neck. It's only then that you notice the blood coating his hands and staining his white suit, the metallic smell soon invading your senses. It was enough to make you want to puke. How could someone like Bruno do such a vile and terrible thing. Perhaps he really was hiding the real him from you all along.

“But that's murder! How could you do something like that?”

“I told you, Tesoro, you don't know what I'm capable of. I could kill your entire family and nobody would even bat an eye in my direction. When you have money, anything is possible.”