#HE LITERALLY SNORTS

[beetlebabber]

She definitely saw me that last time...

I felt a little tingle.

[vivitalks]

freshman/sophomore year riz gukgak on three hours of sleep & five cups of coffee: vibrating out of his skin, one hand on his gun, talking at 100 words per minute, the poster child of paranoia

junior year riz gukgak on zero hours of sleep, nine cups of coffee, perfect grades, & twelve half-assed extracurriculars: literally whining his way through sentences just trying to piece enough words together to allow one coherent transfer of information while his brain melts out of his ears from stress

[magnusbae]

listen now :')

[orphicmeliora]

Secret identity au

You're what people call a walking disaster. You walk into a room, down a street, through a building, hell, even a park bench—anywhere at all—and it's almost guaranteed that someone, somehow, is getting hurt. Maybe a potted plant falls on a passerby. Maybe a toddler accidentally kicks you in the shin with a toy truck. Maybe a scooter mysteriously careens down a ramp and knocks over a vendor's hotdog stand. Either way, pain is usually involved, and statistically speaking, it’s either you or some other poor unfortunate soul caught in your gravitational field of chaos.

The worst part? Most of the time, it’s not even your fault. It’s like the universe itself has you on speed dial for comedic misfortune. Things just happen around you—doors swing open, drinks spill, ceiling tiles fall. Some say you’ve got a black cat’s luck. Others whisper it’s your evol to attract chaos like a lightning rod. Like some sort of cosmic magnet for near-death experiences.

Enter this Lumiere guy who shows up out of nowhere every time you need help. The masked man with a heroic streak and perfect timing. He always seems to be there the second you're dangling from a balcony, caught in a runaway shopping cart, or about to be squashed by a suspiciously fast-moving food delivery drone. He’s graceful, mysterious, and efficient—like if Batman had a Pinterest board full of soft lighting and silk capes. Naturally, you’re halfway in love. Because who doesn’t catch feelings for the guy who literally saves your life every 48 hours? The mask only makes it worse, honestly. What does he look like? Why won’t he take it off? Why does his voice sound like a lullaby dipped in espresso? It's all very stressful.

Anyway, fast forward. You're back from a long shift of not dying (you tripped, a ladder fell, long story), and you’re practically vibrating with excitement over your latest Lumiere sighting. So you do the most obvious thing: call your bestie to fangirl.

You're pacing in the hallway, phone pressed to your ear, animatedly relaying every detail ("I swear, his cape glowed when the sun hit it—no, I'm not exaggerating! And then he caught me—like, full-on princess-style caught me, I thought I was gonna die, but no, he just—ugh, the way he looked down at me, I swear—") when the elevator finally dings and the doors glide open.

That’s when you notice him.

You falter mid-sentence. “Hold on, I think my neighbor wants to murder me with his eyes.”

Xavier doesn’t even blink.

He’s standing a few feet away, waiting to get past you into the hallway, staring like you’ve personally offended his ancestors. As your words trail off, he levels you with the kind of look usually reserved for gum on expensive shoes.

You lower the phone slightly. “Uh…hi?”

Nothing. Just a sharp exhale through the nose and that judgmental, soul-piercing stink eye like you’re the human equivalent of elevator Muzak.

The man is wearing a plain white hoodie and sweatpants like he walked out of a moody fitness ad, and yet he exudes the same intensity as someone plotting world domination—or at the very least, filing a very strongly-worded HOA complaint.

You step aside as he brushes past, muttering something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like “loud.” The nerve.

Okay then.

You resume your call, lowering your voice only slightly. “I don’t know what this guy’s deal is. I’m not that loud. Maybe he’s allergic to joy?” Okay, maybe your voice carries, but you’re excited! You could’ve died! Again! Some people journal. Some people drink. You cope with high-volume storytelling and minor public disturbances.

And you’re just about to get over it when something weird happens. Just for a second, Xavier's hoodie sleeve slips up as he adjusts the grocery bag in his hand.

There’s a flicker of something silver peeking out from under the fabric. Thin, intricate. Almost…mask-like?

Wait.

No.

It can’t be.

Can it?

[merobunns]

this academy ain't big enough fer the two of us

[yaoiconnoisseur]

My friends at MCM London pulled off the impossible and managed to not only find someone to print out BowlcutStarion last minute while at the con but got Neil Newbon to sign it for me

The quote says "You're perfect every time!"

[corpusdiem-seizethedead]

Charlie: Angel is smiling, did something happen?

Angel: What? I can’t smile just ‘cause I feel like it?

Husk: Valentino tripped and fell in the parking lot.

[universallydestinytaco]

I think it would be hilarious if we got an episode taking a swipe at the fandom’s tendency of infantilizing Pim by having an episode where Pim is actually quite annoyed over the idea of being perceived by most as merely “uwu innocent smol bab” (and quit dating all-together because all of his exes would be obnoxiously condescending and smothering towards him) who couldn’t possibly comprehend adult subjects but with every attempt to be edgier and more mature he’s still treated like the cutesy naive child-like critter who’s so pure and can do no wrong and everything he freaking does is so damn adorbs (like how fans still act as if he’s child-coded even after his drugged-up antics in “Charlie and Pim and Bill vs the Alien”) and it’s driving him up the wall.

Maybe I can incorporate it into a Charpim fic and have Charlie teach Pim how to be edgy and during a botched attempt, they piss off a bunch of bikers and *gasp* when Charlie attempts to save Pim, Pim ends up saving Charlie and he’s impressed how his friend is so brave and cool and Pim feels validated because someone finally acknowledges his maturity and doesn’t see him as a fragile doll needing protection!

[mrmeepsmadmind]

stack being such a big presence even while in the hivemind because he's already so attuned to everyone's emotions constantly to try && keep the cheer && make sure everyone's happy so he can keep being of delightful service to everyone.. && also This Sad Cat Image would literally be him with .0000000001 nanosecond of not having everyone's attention on him 24/7. && the Hive has no choice but to cater to his every ache && need or he'll keep hashing the vibe by being an attention wh0re

remmick trying to convert someone else to his hive: hi-

stack: oh i am just small potatoes .

rem: ???

stack: oh i am nothingness. oh i am unimportance 😔

[willowser]

the thing about bakugou and attraction is that he's not shallow and i don't think he has a type. like, he considers the value people have—who they are, what their strengths are, their passions, their goals, their mindset—and i think those are the most defining factors for him when it comes to 'liking' someone.

and yeah, he's a man. he has initial and instant attractions to people. but i think they're fleeting and go as quick as they come. so i think he doesn't pay much attention to physical appearance, per se, when it comes to deciding who he wants to give his time to.

but—when he does decide that you are the person he wants to give his time to, everything about you is suddenly so attractive.

[idyllphile]

important detail that when Tuco was beating the fuck out of Mike, he told him "let go!" over and over, and he gave Mike a second to do it every time before punching him again when he didn't

he gave him chance after chance to back off! because he wasn't having fun like he usually does when beating someone up! because he did not, in fact, actively want to brutalize an old man! he's such an obvious softie for the elderly I love him

[subtle-as-an-earthquake]

"It's quite hard to blow that trumpet... but I'll give it a go." [x]

[aioliravioli-69]

Chase: So I put the keys in this formation and then I uh...I...uhm, are you sure about this Dorkin?

Deacon: It's what the keys said you'd have to do and they probably know the ritual better than you

Chase: Yeah, but they've also been asleep everytime they went through it

Deacon: Come on Chase, we've come so far, you can't chicken out now!

Chase: I-...I'm not chickening out, it's just...are we 100% sure this is what I'm supposed to do?

Deacon: What other information do we have?

Chase: I...ok, I'll do it...for mom

Chase: Here goes nothing I guess

[akascow]

"the final. glorious. evolution"

"viktor what the fuck dude turn us back"

"now this. is perfection"

[quintinh43]

[pergaminaa]

Modern au

Manon is the kind who tends to forget to charge her phone like, she’s not at 12% or 10% no this is too full of a battery for her she’s usually at like 3% and honestly the phone dies before she can make a single call and this is… a problem because at times she actually needs to call someone but her phone is dead.

Dorian joked that he should put a tracker on her like either in her shoes or jewelry because what do you mean you’re stranded/lost somewhere without a working phone witchling can you charge your phone before you leave please???? Like this man is there with five different power banks that she also forgets to charge and he’s sitting there with all of these dead devices because this is a problem???