#I am actually gonna cry for bunch of pixels... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

shippy-from-apocalypse · 5 years ago

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Ok so we have a lot to unpack so this is gonna be long.

SPOILER ALERT! DO NOT READ PAST THIS PLEASE IT’S SUCH A GOOD EPISODE! GO HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN AND THEN COME BACK TO CHECK ON THE TAG OK?

The almost confirmation of another side is just *chieff kiss* even tho we have already kinda figured it out because we all just collectivaly assumed the rainbow must complete Leslie Odom Jr. was there and I legit screamed when he appeared on screen Patton again saying stuff like “we all agree that-” and correcting himself and trying his best to make sure he isn’t too pushy but it’s so overwhelming and he is trying so hard to balance it because it’s his job to think morally????I just love him. That song.That animation.That writing.The amount of searching probably involved.Everything.It seems like it was put so much effort into everything and I love and appreciate Thomas and his friends so much for it.They are all angels who I must protect. That thing they did with “Deceit’s/Patton health” and “Thoma’s mental health”. That...that was cleverness.

Ok everyone is talking about Roman being pushed over his limit,but It also hurted a lot seeing Patton being interrogated even when he clearly said he didn’t know and showed distress and,,,,he’s doing his best ok? Roman still deserves attention tho he was so hurt with everything.And it seems like by the end he was just feeling so bad because he missed so much and NOW they decide it’s ok to accept Deceit?I’ts so frustating and I totally understand his point.He was almost villanized for considering his opinion on SVS pt1 Roman blaming himself for having desires..baby no Patton’s face when he sees Roman’s state

”We love you” ”Yeah right” bABY NO- That part where everything went quiet ant the pixel train hit and Thomas covered his ears?T H E R E I S A T H I N G S U C H A S C I N E M A P E R F E C T I O N

Logan apreciation moment because he deserves it and was bitter over people not caring about him so can we not Not talk about him?(And Patton trying to show he enjoys Lo’s company.I can’t do words right now) I can’t stress enought how AMAZING Thomas’ acting is!Pure gold! Deceit fucking K.Owing the shit out of Patton with information chart Janus spilling some tea right there about mental health.(did I mention he is my favorite character?He is) Janus looking like he was almost close to crying the whole damn time around the end. It kills me!And being vulnerable and revealing his name just to be hurt?Oof the ”Thank GOD you don’t have a mustache Roman” scene.Intense.He was hurt and he wanted to show Roman he was being a dick and he just went where it hurts.That thing was too real.Roman’s fear of being like his brother SHOWS on his face and everyone is hurt by now. HE AIN’T NO EVIL SNAKY BOI.HE IS ONLY NAKY BOI! HE IS SUCH A DORK I CAN’T Patton leaving Thomas with deceit and trusting him (to some extent ant least) just shows a whole bunch of character growth That part about “how many sorrys”.that shit...was deep and got me crying thank you. That part when they are talking about fearing not being able to know when too stop or until when it’s ok to take care of yourself instead of being selfless.Everything about this made me cry.

Mental health just as important as Physical health.Typing with my feet cuz my hands are accupied clapping.

That final part when Thomas talks with the fans?I was phisically sobbing. Who needs therapy when you can watch a new Sanders Sides episode am I right? Virgil not appearing at all is at least mildly concerning.But I’d rather not think about what it implies(might actually discuss it later) Deceit’s character means so much to me.Like,SO much.And the fact that thomas takes his time to show that it’s ok to be like that sometimes and really it’s ok to not be perfect.It’s so important and I love anyone who takes their time to show this. Sorry I couldn’t organize this better but I should be asleep now so I better stop talking

#Thomas Sanders #Sanders Sides #Logan #Patton #Deceit #Janus #logan sanders #Virgil #Feels #SVS #Remus

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bramblescrossing · 5 years ago

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#askbram !

A whole bunch of asks answered below the cut!

warning, it’s really long! ♡

Uploading Designs After Using My Tutorials!

Hey! I don’t mind if you upload them to your creator code, but if possible I would really love a reference/tag to my accounts if you post them anywhere! Mostly because I want to see how you end up using them! ♡

I’m @bramblescrossing here (lol) and instagram @ BramsDesigns on twitter!

@cherrixing

Would you post grids for your designs?

Hey! I would be down for that! I’m thinking I’m going to do a once a month poll where you guys get to vote on which one get’s the pixels posted! The only reason I’m a bit adverse to posting all of them is because it takes a bunch more work, especially with posting all the info for the color palettes! But I’m willing to put in the work if people are wanting this!

Can you do ____ Tutorial?

I haven’t made one yet, but I’ll work on one for you right now! I’ll post it ASAP!

@vennitrii

First, sdjghsalkdg you’re gonna make me cry, non!

Second, oh man, I haven’t even tried yet! Both are now on my list of future tutorials!

@acupofblackcoffeeonesugar

Could you be more specific? Like a whole top? Or? Send me some reference pictures! :)

Adding it to my list! I’ll do some pixel letter tutorials, but in the mean time, you can google search pixel letters and get some help if ya want! I’m by no means the first or the only!

Wildewisp Weekly Updates!

Hey nonnies! Abosultey! I made the template myself using photoshop (took forever lol!) The whole picture is 540x900 pixels and I cut it into 3 pictures that are 540x300! That is the standard tumblr picture size I believe!

Design Limit Stuff

I believe that character would be able to post 130 more, which I am considering doing. However, I am hesitant because of having another creator-code and having to remember which design goes with which character when making edits. But Bramble (as a character) is likely to make a reappearance soon and join Murmur so I can create more!

I have heard that! That you share you design slots! Such an incredible bummer for families who share! I am so sorry :( I wonder if that means each character would have editing rights over a design created by someone on the island? My guess is not? But if it is, it could solve some of my issues with starting another character (see above).

@snailienz

I think design packs would be such a great idea! Or the option to rearrange the codes on your creator portal? I totally get that Nintendo has a server and limits, etc etc, that thy have to consider, but I don’t think there is NO way the limit/way designs are shared won’t change! I think there’s lots of options. I’m pretty sure the Infrared sensor on the joycons could even read a qr code? Lot’s of options, @nintendo!!

“Not Active” Designs

You are so so welcome! I’ll be adding that image to the top of each original post, and adding the tag #notactive so you can check that as well! It helps me to keep things straight on my end, too!

Inspiration?

Hey nonny, don’t get discouraged! The wonderful thing about all of this is you can change it pretty much at will! And taking inspiration from others is great! That’s how ideas grow! I would say, in regards to appreciating your island, find little spots here and there that are filled with your favorite things! And don’t be afraid to join a community here on tumblr or via a discord! There’s lots of them out there!

Honestly, that’s why I love taking requests! People have so many different and wonderful ideas, it always tests my skills! Other than that, pinterest and tumblr are great places to find cute outfits!

I’ve always been an artist in my spare time and have really loved pixel art since ACNL! Honestly, practice makes progress! I go in to more details about specific stuff for AC designing here!

@buunnypriince

#happiness

@morgrenth sdgjasdhgkjl thank you so so much!! I really have fun with it!

sdhgkjsadg thank you both so much! I really really really appreciate it. Seriously, saving these asks so I can read them again and again!! <3

@gaiamoth

@sanuas kdsjhgksjad Ily too!!! <3 <3

djhaskdljg thank you so so much. thank you for the encouragement! <3 <3

@whisperel jkdsghalskdg thank you so so much, truly. I needed this love, today!

@elizawritescrap <3 hugs to you tooo!!!

Other!

Hey island name anon! First, thank you for telling me! I did spend a loooooonngggg time coming up with that name haha, but I also get it! it’s not copyrighted or anything! I hope the name is bringing you and your island as much joy as it is bringing me!!

I do some of the css stuff to tweak things, as many of the theme blogs are inactive and not taking requests! But all the theme designers credit can be found on each individual page! I did not make any of the actual themes!

#ask bram #bramblesrambles

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shsldepressedlesbian · 5 years ago

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I... I wanna draw the cruise to despair characters, but I have no idea what they look like

HSHSHH BRO IF U DREW THEM I WOULD. LITERALLY CRY

but yes i dont exactly have an actual ref of them,, since i cant actually draw hahah tho i am working on pixels for all of them

also, after i release the prologue, im gonna have report cards shortly after with the characters descriptions, and i have also have a bunch of irl refs

so bro,, if u want,, hmu

#inbox #cruise to despair #bdhdh im also very open to talking about them cause like i said i love them all

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frostythefrostedfox · 2 years ago

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"So, she meets 3 criteria, great!"

You know, it's just a low-level Sonic fandom act, right?

Oh hello there lad or lass, I hope you are having a great day, I would welcome you to this awful corner of the internet but it seems like you've made yourself at home already, considering how I do not tag any of my reblogs or replies yet you still found my blog, that means you either compulsively checked the previous ask, and you are that techno-karen lover fella I have been hearing so much about; or you unironically read this blog with the sole intent of getting mad at things because that is your favourite hobby, to get offended.

I wish I knew your name dear clown, but since I don't, I am gonna call you Keiichirou, because you remind me of that kid from Ghost Stories, not everytime he opened his mouth nothing made sense, he was also dyslexic to a comical degree.

Really, I wish I had an idea of what you just said, what does that "a low-level sonic fandom act" means, so maybe you can send another ask explaining things a little bit more, that is if you actually have any arguments and you're not just repeating the words of your favourite youtuber.

If you are going to keep crying about someone's opinions on your beloved character, which by the way I shall remind you isn't real, is not gonna get hurt, is just a bunch of pixels on a screen, they are not gonna get offended and they are not gonna congratulate you and give you a free copy of the next Sonic game for defending them,if you are gonna keep doing that, then you must do me a favour and let me collect your tears on a pot so I can use them to make tea later, the saltyness of them makes a great natural flavour enhancer

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rpjohnston · 7 years ago

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RWBY spoilers!

Well, I’m not going to do a proper liveblog with pics and all since it’s 6 volumes in and Volume 5 didn’t impress me, but if Volume 6 turns out to be really good maybe I’ll snazz it up a bit. Anyway, thoughts on Episode 1 of Volume 6 here. - Wow, starting off with some quality modeling here. It’s come a long way from its low-poly beginnings hasn’t it? Though the low-poly had its charm in the way that pixel games do, I can appreciate the effort that went into making this look GOOD. I can FEEL that grove of trees, you know? -Opening fight isn’t bad. Still not as frenetic and hard to follow as the first/second volume were, but also not as laborious as the last couple, for a mook fight. Had a pretty good balance of movement whipping by and still being able to see what was actually happening. Camera work improved, too. -Adam is still a manbaby, yep. I haven’t seen any of the new Star Wars but I’m under the impression that Kylo Ren is basically this. -Welp Team RWBY is DEFINITELY leaving Weiss’s side, for more than a second. I promise. See, Oz would’ve had the wisdom not to jinx it, Ruby. Better stop talking before you get us Volume 3, 2: electric boogaloo. With an electric-themed enemy, for irony’s sake. -I do appreciate though that they seem to be moving around a lot more like they used too. Everyone moved about as fast in Volume 5 as I do and I’m 30 years old. -Ahahah, yes, we have Tweedle De and Tweedle...Dudley. This should be good. -Nope, just regular dudebros. At least for now. Heheh, had to rewatch a few times to catch of of Ruby’s and Yang’s faces that was great. Whoever is the first to make looping gifs of each is a hero! =D -Ilia and Blake was touching, and then...Look, I mean, Sun’s personality just grates on me, ok? He’s a good guy, I know that. I just can’t stand him. Also, Neptune...I don’t think so, nah. -Emotive. Ears. Wanna. Fluff. -Must. Fluff. -Fluuuuuuuuufffff -Well as long as the gunchucks come out again I’ll put up with him whenever he comes back -Not sure about Neptune’s problem. Pissed about the swing and the miss and strike out at the soccer game? Or maybe it’s just, you know, Sun. -Ok who is Techno Granny Katara, I must know. This is important. -RIP tequila sunrise. Best character, snatched away as soon as we met. ;_;7 -Ok let’s not kill Dee off QUITE yet, he still has time to be the Woobie -Yeah yeah, crying babies, how sad. I’m reminded of that stupid Naruto filler arc that had a bunch of children crying EVERY GODDAMN EPISODE. Not even kidding. something like 7 episodes. And sometime more than once per episode, 2. It was the Sonic 2006 of Naruto arcs. Anyway, crying baby tropes are annoying and lazy -Ok Ruby, technically you’re right, but you’re saying that in a “it doesn’t matter at all, I trust Oz implicitly” tone of voice, and while I too am sure that he’s a good guy and has his reasons, you had this whole THING where you told him to stop bullshitting and you of all people should be holding his feet to the fire. -Techno Granny Katara you are up to something and I demand to know what your deal is -Oof. Flashbacks. Well trauma doesn’t heal quickly. -DAMN Yang, takin’ the bull by the horns. That. Was. SWEET. -So I’m gonna call these manticores, lead by a chimera. -Got some instances of people standing around firing guns when they aren’t the focus of the action. Eh. -ohhhh, owwwww, that was some JANKY ass animation of the train falling off. That was pretty glaring actually. Ow. -Ok Techno Granny Katara is joining us, cool cool. Good job surviving that while being cushioned by 6 inches of cold hard steel, by the way. Those soft, delicate children got the snow. -Oh, Techno Granny Katara is in the opening too, sweet. So she’s gonna be Important. -Gonna need to see the lyrics for this cause I can’t make them out. But overall it sounds pretty solid, I’d say I’d rank the openings...3-2-4-6-1-5. Alright well this is starting off much better than Volume 5 did and possibly better than 4, we’ll see. It’s kind of hard to rank it against 1 and 2 since the composition is so vastly different. This will have to fall pretty hard to land badly after that start, though. How about...8/10. Lost a point because of that Thomas the Tank Engine-ass wreck animation. Seriously, knock a few chips off that peaceful glade quality and stick ‘em in there. Oh also, did they really just kill off Tweedle Dee for cheap stakes? Come on. I don’t expect Shakesperian writing and RWBY would honestly be pretty bad if that was the aim, it thrives on playing tropes straight, but there are still some that are just too lazy even for this genre. Looked up the lyrics, they seem more...metaphorical than is typical for RWBY. Going to have to think a bit on what they mean.

#rwby #rwby volume 6 episode 1

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sending-the-message · 7 years ago

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HOW TO BE BEAUTIFUL AND THIN by Skelethin

Hello everyone, so, uh, I want to be beautiful and thin. And I’ll tell you exactly how you can too!

There’s a storm deep within me that’s dying to get out. It’s a storm of rage and self hate, constantly gnawing at my fat to escape. I must admit, I’m not fat and I never have been. I have always been a size small, since I’m 5’3 and 105 lbs to begin with. What hurts more is that I’m simply average. Normal body, normal size, normal everything. I’m considered “normal thin”, and not fat nor skinny. I’ve never been anything special. I’m 15 and I frequently enjoy, well, different things than your average teen. I’m obsessed with books, and only classic literature. I only listen to classical music and I play a few instruments, as well as spend my time writing poetry and practicing ballet En Pointe.

Anyway, now that you know a little bit about me, I’m here to tell you exactly how I got thin and beautiful. So, I had tried everything at this point; being Vegan for a few months, which resulted in Anaemia, I tried the Keto diet, which also didn’t work. I even tried diet pills, which no, did not give me a tapeworm. I will admit, I was losing 4 pounds per week, but that’s simply not enough. How do people even have the patience to diet for months while losing as little as 1-4 lbs per week? I didn’t. I had to find a way to speed up the process. I stumbled across a diet known as an “Ana Diet”, unbeknownst to me, it definitely would work. It was on some website called “AnaBones4evur.com” and i figured it was a spam site at first, since it popped up like an annoying ad on the bottom of my computer when I was searching other legit dieting websites. This one didn’t seem professional, as it was a minimalistic page. The font looked as if it were tipping and falling off the page, as well as little blue sparks were glitching all over the deep black wallpaper of the website. I looked closer, and I noticed that the millions of little blue sparks that were glitching were in fact mini pixel butterflies. Strange. There were only a few links displayed on the page, which were clearly misspelt.

There was an “Abooout”, an “FAQ”, a “Store” And a “Dietes, Tricks and Ttipss”. Now, I know what you’re thinking, clearly it’s a fake scam website as all the red flags were there. Mind you, I was absolutely desperate to lose weight. As silly as this sounds, I couldn’t just be happy and satisfied with a body like any average girl. I wanted mine to be surreal, angelic, ethereal, like sharp jagged bones protruding like glass. So first, I clicked on the store. There weren’t many items being sold; just scales, measuring tapes, laxatives, diuretics, exercise merch, and a bunch of purple bracelets with the same bluebell butterfly symbol on them. The prices were all surprisingly low, and I hoped that the FAQ would say something about the butterfly, so I clicked on that next.

There were only 5 Questions with short non-detailed answers below. It’s weird, since all the questions seemed odd but well punctuated, and the answers from the website host was misspelling everything and often using foreign letters such as “ ç, ż, ł, ß, æ, ø, œ, ü, ę, ŵ, etc.” It was strange. One of the questions was “How long does it take to lose about 60 lbs?” And the host answered “well, if you follow all the ÅNNNNÁ rules, then you will lose 60 lbs in about 5 months. Usūally yoau losę 8 pounds p3er ŵeek (((:” the rest of the questions weren’t very important. So I clicked “Abooout” and it was also short paragraphed. It looked a little like this:

“Hallo And Welcym freinds!!! U are now part of the ÁnNa famly. Everywun who joyns, is my fellowe sister or brothear!! U can onlye be acepTed on 1 Condishin. You MUST FOLLEW allkklllllll the rules. If u fail to follew evry rool, u will be BANNED FROm THISE WEBSIGHT. How will I Kno if u breyk a rule?? TrUuuuuust me. I kno. I am Alwaus Watching u. It u sighn up here, I Will Automauticalli have Access to sey what u r doing 24 HRs A DAY. SeveRe Punichment will come ur way if u Brayk a rule.

Remember, have Fün and liive Dangeroushly!!”

Xoxoxo- MIA

Finally, I clicked the diet, tricks, and tips. All of them were normal enough, at least at first. “Eat only X amount of calories per day” and the punishment is, if you eat over 900 calories then you will have severe nightmares for 8 days. You have 3 strikes. If you go over 900 for the third time in a row, you will have severe physical pains. I don’t believe in a lot of supernatural stuff, I mean, I believe in ghosts, but not that some random person on the internet has the power to control your mind and your body. You have to exercise until you faint, if you stop exercising and you’re still able to walk and stand fine, then you aren’t doing it enough. You must count and measure everything that goes in your mouth. You must make yourself throw up in case you accidentally consume a little extra calories. I hate vomit, but if it will make me lose weight, I will do it.

So I tried. On August 1st I began my diet. I restricted. That was the main word etched in my mind: Restriction Restriction. Other words were “Willpower” and “Self Control.” I have the willpower to restrict my calories, and I feel like I am the Goddess of my own body. I have immense self-control that people often express how jealous they are, that I easily decline delicious sweets being offered to me. Every time my stomach rumbles and moans and screams at me for my cruelty, I smack it and tell it that it’s not hungry, just bored. Who knew that feeling hungry and empty felt so good?? The “full�� feeling I used to feel when I ate normally was disgusting. Bloated belly, full of food, now is empty shrinking belly. I feel so weightless, like a feather. I hated vomit, but soon I began to vomit 5 times a day. I never went over my calories. I was gonna be the one to do everything perfectly so I can impress Mia. I will be the number one winner in her dieting contest. She will absolutely love me. She expresses adoration for me already. Her little voice in my head constantly praises me after a good purge.

September 10th: I feel so nauseous. My bones ache and my whole body is sore. I think I worked out too hard last night. My breath still reeks of last nights vomit even though I brushed them like, 12 times. I had to tell people my teeth are yellow because I ate something that contained food colouring. It’s tiring, having to pretend to make breakfast and lunch so my dad thinks I’m eating. Luckily he’s the only person I live with. It’s crazy how the only reason I manage to get out of bed is so I can weigh myself. The scale is my religion. I hated math, but now I love it. I’m the best at counting calories and measuring the size of my waist and my thighs, and that number that drops every day is amazing. I weighed in at 83 lbs today. My dad doesn’t know since my old clothes are the only thing I wear, and they’re huge on my delicate and dainty figure.

October 1st: I can’t even move. My long pretty fingernails are yellow and brittle and they constantly fall off whenever I scratch my dry, itchy head. My once thick mass of luscious blonde hair is dirty and greasy and stringy, falling out in clumps when I brush it, when I shower, and when I wake up. My skin feels like a snake; patchy and scaly. I’ve always been pale, but never like this. It’s a annoying how everyone asks if I’m sick or if I have a fever. They don’t know. They’ll NEVER understand. I’m constipated so I have to rely on 15 lax a day. I can’t sleep because I’m so hungry, and when I do sleep, all my dreams are food-related to me binging, and I wake up in a panic, crying since I think it’s real. I can’t walk 3 steps to my own bathroom in my own room. It hurts. I want to pass out and pant heavily whenever I walk up the stairs, as it feels as if I have walked 30 miles. I resorted to crawling everywhere. Sometimes, my dad has to carry me.

November 1st: I hate my my life. I used to have depression before, but it’s never been this severe. I feel like the more weight I lose, the more depressed I get. MIA LIED. She said I’d be happier once I’m thin. She promised I’d look like one of those models in the VS show. They don’t look as dead as I. My dad is a mortician, and he constantly remind me that I look and feel like a dead body. I’m cold, my skin is so so cold. I’m cold. I wore Uggs, Sweatpants, a sweatshirt, and thick blanket in 105 degrees and I was shivering and freezing. Every time I stand up my vision fades to black and all these black little dots dance around my blurry vision. It’s like when you stand up too fast you get dizzy spells, except it happens to me all the damn time. I have to lay down 4 towels on the toilet seat to go pee since it hurts my bones. I have to sleep on 5 blankets since it hurts my bones. I can’t sit on wooden chairs because it stabs my bones.

Everyone says they’re worried about me. Teachers pull me aside, my ballet instructor, the nurse, store owners when I go and order a Diet Coke during lunch rather than actual food. I don’t even look twice at the display of pastries. I’m successful. Everyone says I’m too thin and I need a doctor, blah blah blah. They’re wrong. They have no idea how long it took for me to get here. They have no idea how I desperately needed this. They have no idea all the effort I put. They need to appreciate how beautiful I am. I thought they’d praise me. They’re just denying I’m beautiful, they’re all jealous. They stare at me with haunting and pitying eyes and whisper behind my back. They gasp and gape at my body wherever I go. See how jealous they are? They want to be me. They’re just saying I’m dangerously thin because they wish my body was theirs. Well, I had to work for it. If being thin was easy, everyone would do it. We live in a world of gluttony where everyone is constantly stuffing their face, whereas I eat every other day.

December 1st: Too weak. Can’t move. I have missed school for a week now. My skin is more blue and purple than white, and it’s not my veins. My lips are dry and white with a slight pale red and swollen shut with dead skin hanging off. I have heavy and thick black bags underneath my eyes. I FEEL BEAUTIFUL. My body is covered in bruises, even though I do nothing but sit on my ass all day watching TV. Mia said it’s okay to stop exercising since I’m so weak, so I deserve a break. My metabolism is dead, and I’ve hit a few plateaus, but I��m almost to my goal weight. It’s funny because my goal weight gets lower and lower the more weight I lose. At 105 lbs my goal was 95. I got there, and I still looked obese. Then it was 85, got there, and still obese. 75, got there, and still obese. I’m currently 68 lbs and my goal is 59. 5 is my favourite number, and 9 is one less away from being the highest and the greatest: 10.

It’s so funny. It’s like I was blind my whole life. I never really thought I was fat, but Mia said to take one good look in the mirror, which opened my eyes, and suddenly, I realised, maybe I AM obese. Soon those protruding bones became rolls of fat and I physically transformed into a monster. My mirror was alive and moving. It kept morphing and twisting and distorting like a fun-house mirror. Why isn’t enough? I think I was born with a special body that can’t be skinny no matter how much weight I lose. That number on the scale will never be enough. It will never satisfy my cravings and my need for skinny. Maybe my goal should be 50.

December 10th: I’ve fainted 4 times so far. I get Charlie horses in my legs every night. My dad says I have low magnesium and blood pressure. As well has dangerously low blood sugar and severe iron deficiency. He’s lying. He just wants to make a big fat ass again. My heart rate is currently 40 BPM. There is one thing that i love, though, and that’s my period. It’s gone. I haven’t had it in forever. My dad keeps crying and getting on his knees and begging me to eat, telling me I’m painfully thin. He’s just MOCKING ME. Everyone who says I’m thin is a big fat liar. They know I’m an obese pig, they just want to lie to me. I’m the only one who sees my body truly for what it is, why can’t everyone else? I know the real me is fat. Apparently everyone else just looks shocked and surprised when I say I’m still fat. “Gaunt Girl” they call me. “Emaciated Evangeline” they call me. “Starving Sister” I’m called. “Skinny Minnie” “itty-bitty” “Malnourished.” Everyone calls me either a zombie, a vampire, or a ghost.

I don’t even FEEL alive. I feel more like I’m existing, but not living. I don’t feel like I have a life. It’s as if I’m a puppet. Or someone is playing with me like an unmoving doll. I can’t breathe, i can’t sleep, i can’t eat, and I feel dead. I feel brain dead. I can’t even move now. I lay on the couch all day, barely moving my head. I can’t even watch tv or go on my phone. I can’t even tell you what I said 3 minutes ago. My memory used to be intelligent and sharp, now I can’t remember anything. My vocabulary speaking-wise is that of a 5 year old. My mind is that of a 5 year old. I dumbed down as my malnourished brain and mental state deteriorated. I am nothing but a decomposing body, waiting to be as light as dust. Soon to be ashes. I can only really remember to speak 5 words “Hi, Bye, No, Yes, Okay.” THIS IS WHAT PERFECTION FEELS LIKE

December 17th: This is Evangeline’s Dad. I found her diary and all the sickening things she’s written in it about her diet and some website. Evangeline Elizabeth Winters was admitted to X hospital at X address for a possible cardiac arrest. It appears she was found unconscious in her bed. On December 16th 10:31 AM. She is thankfully not in a coma. They were able to shock her heart and revive her. It is an utter miracle that she is along the 2% of patients who are able to recover from cardiac arrest.

January 1st: Hello everyone, I’m back! I’m in the hospital and they have diagnosed me with something that ended in “Nervosa” and I can’t remember what the first part is. All I know is that Mia would be so proud of me. I got a message saying “I’m the official Ana of the website.” And apparently Ana is the highest ranking position. There are many Anas, but there’s only one true perfect Ana. Along with Mia, she promised we’d rule together! I can hear her talking in my head already. Apparently I’m forced to be submitted into an Inpatient facility at a mental hospital for a few months, as well as be supervised and regularly see a dietician, a doctor, and a psychiatrist. I did nothing wrong.. it’s just a diet. Why can’t anyone let me be skinny? Why do they want me to be fat?? I’d rather kill myself than be fat.

January 2cd: I managed to steal a knife off of the medical table while no one was looking. It’s 1:30am and I’m going to do the final step it takes to become a true Ana. Cut off the rest of my fat. My bones are in the way, but I’ll find the fat hiding behind them.

This is what perfection feels like. This is what perfection is. Perfection is death. I am thin and beautiful, and I can already see Mia’s shadowy figure smile at me with glowing fangs across my bed.

ThÁbks For raéDjng this And Becum a Membrrr of THe Dïett!!! -Evangel-AÑNÁ

#reddit #nosleep #scary #story

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maiji · 7 years ago

Photo

Process and wip images for A House That Holds Long Limbs (Part 3)

Previous process and wip documentation: Part 1 / Part 2

Read the pages for part 3 here (full complete version will be linked from YYH North Bound master post)

In Parts 1 and 2 I went through the transitions between idea, script, thumbnails and final art in quite a bit of detail. This time I’ll share script and thumbnails and point out some of the biggest changes, and then talk about how I scan and clean the final artwork.

Script and thumbnails

Biggest changes:

Dialogue changes every-freaking-where. Changes in word choice, moving things around to make the dialogue flow better, rewriting to make things flow better up to the umpteenth hour (i.e., right when I’m inking).

Page 24 “It is enough to know the letter has been delivered” - this thought has been transplanted onto the next page. I was also running out of space on each page for so many wordy words. Looking back now I’d probably like to move Hokushin’s “I can read it, not that she needs to know that” earlier in the sequence of panels, but it’s too late and whatever.

Page 25 split into two pages because 1) the dialogue started growing on the first of the 2 pages and I wanted to give more emphasis to the woman dropping her “tee hee I’m matchmaking” bomb and Hokushin’s “lol get me out of here” expression.

The last page with Raizen did not exist in the script or the thumbnails. I tacked it on at the last second because the previous change increased the page count to 9. I’m drawing 2 pages up on an 11x8.5 sheet of paper (so each page is about 5.5 x 8.5), so this meant I was left facing an empty page. I impulsively threw in a “meanwhile, Raizen’s shenanigans” for fun.

As an aside, this level of dialogue is what I was anticipating the hypothetical “let’s separate Hokushin and Raizen with some random NPC offering a job” scenario to involve (see Part 1 process and wip discussion). You can see why I was so eager to ditch that idea and find something simpler and more efficient.

I feel like "I was (too) careless!" is such a stock (shounen) manga phrase. Therefore I must work in "Seems like I underestimated [...whatever thing they underestimated]" and "Impossible!!" into upcoming parts of the story lol.

Inking

Part way through inking I actually ran out of ink in my new cartridge. I had started the comic with 0.3mm Muji black pen, and it ran out a while back. I switched to 0.4mm (because that’s all they had in stock at the time)... and then actually ran out of the ink part way through on these pages. @atorier lent me a 0.3mm refill so these pages mix both thicknesses in the art. I can’t really tell the difference though... can you?

Part 3 was super fun to illustrate because it’s 90% subtle facial expressions, one of my favourite things to draw. The downside is WAY TOO MANY WORDS BEING SQUEEZED IN EVERYWHERE. I’ve never been very good at managing my speech bubbles - drawing them, positioning them, and fitting words in them. I never give them the time needed for proper planning and I often write rather impatiently, as if I am jotting down a note, instead of carefully lettering each word. They’re simply very sloppy, which results in a lot of mistakes...

It used to be that when I made a mistake in the later stages of the art (mainly, inking) I’d cry and throw everything out because I’m a complete failure, this is all worthless, etc. Nowadays I’m like uhhh... #@^&^#$!!! Oh well. Depending on the mistake I still have moments of I’M A COMPLETE FAILURE, but then I just redo it on the side or add a note to myself to fix it on the computer for the final version. Here you can see a whole bunch of mistakes around lettering and placement of things.

And this is just to make it more legible. It’s still ugly lol. (That’s why I use a font for my webcomic...)

Scanning / editing

Long Limbs is drawn in black and white which makes it a hell of a lot easier to scan/clean/prep final art. I use an old Canoscan LIDE110. I’ve upgraded once or twice but always to another Canoscan (basically whatever the latest version of this series is). It’s a cheap workhorse and lots of other scanners use Canon’s scanning technology so it’s always suited my purposes very well.

For black and white lineart, I scan at 600 dpi black and white. These are my settings as they show up in the default scanner software:

For clarification, the only parts I really pay attention to/change is Color Mode (black and white) and output resoluton to 600 dpi. Most of the other stuff was already calculated or set.

Industry practice is generally 1200 dpi for black and white line art, with 600 being a “if your computer can’t handle it and is gonna blow up... this is sufficient”. I rarely bother going up to 1200 mainly because I don’t usually have applications where I need it for output (this comic is not intended for print, for instance. And even if I ever do someday print it for whatever reason, it’s not likely to be bigger than a small comic). Scanning in black and white mode also conveniently kills most of the pencil lines I still have left so that post-scan cleanup work is minimized to a degree.

Here’s a shot of the page that was scanned.

Oh god look at all the mistakes that need to be fixed hahaha.

On the computer, I crop the individual pages and save them separately. Then I blow up to 100% and start selecting/deleting unwanted dust/artifacts/dots etc. Sometimes I also just use the eraser for cleaning fine details, but select+delete is faster for large patches.

This is also the opportunity to make corrections. To be honest, there’s not much retouching on these pages because I am lazy and trying to get them out as quickly as possible, so it’s mostly getting rid of artifacts, a few stray lines from ink smearing if I smudged or erased before it was fully dry, cleaning the shapes of a few letters to make them more legible, deleting errors and pasting the fixes over where the errors used to be, and any really stupid mistakes I’ve made - like drawing the fixes to Hokushin’s hitatare in Part 2. For redrawing/adding new parts on the computer, since the art is in black and white mode at such a high dpi, almost any brush will work great and look indistinguishable from the scanned lines when scaled down.

I save a high res TIFF for my archives. Then I convert to greyscale (better for maintaining details when I resize, since black and white can drop things that aren’t 100% black or white), and resize to 72 dpi at 700 pixels wide. 72 dpi has long been the standard for on-screen viewing - nowadays screens can display higher resolutions (e.g., retina) but this looks fine to me so I’ve long stuck with good ol’ 72. I arbitrarily picked the 700 dpi width - it seemed a good balance of “not too small” and “looks big enough to let you see the art nicely” on Tumblr. Below are my settings to resize:

Again, the above I mostly only pay attention to width and resolution. All the other stuff is mostly default or autocalculated. All my pages are different heights, which I don’t really care about since I’m just posting them on tumblr and pixiv. Finally I save as JPG for posting.

Ta da!

#yu yu hakusho #comics #fanart #hokushin #raizen #wip #process #drawings #yyh north bound #art by Maiji/Mary Huang #scanning artwork #cleaning artwork

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