#I'm having a blast /srs

[susivoi]

Show is shit /hj but Plagg and Tikki are still as lovely as ever! /srs

[nixotinix]

Id really like to request Zatanna if that's okay. She's my favorite;_;

thank you for the request anon, and of course of course!! i love Zatanna, i don't draw her as much as I should,,,

DC character requests are still very open! :D

[applealchemist]

i think i see a pattern here with my favorite characters...

[astonmartinii]

copycat | oscar piastri social media au

pairing: oscar piastri x fem reader

they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but really it's just annoying

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

note: sorry to all of the chloes of the world, i just chose a random name!

f1tea

liked by user1, user2 and 27,305 others

tagged: yourusername, chloereed

f1tea: SHE STRIKES AGAIN! y/n y/ln, oscar piastri's girlfriend, recently changed up her style with some bangs and surprise, surprise chloe reed shared her updated look just days later. then to really pour salt in the wound, reed posted yet again in mclaren merch. will she ever give up?

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user3: BRO YOU COULDN'T HAVE WAITED AT LEAST A WEEK?

user4: i think all subtlety was lost when she copied a literal TATTOO

user5: the way it's y/n's tattoo dedicated to oscar as well...

user6: at what point do we get a restraining order?

user7: the day that girl ends up in the paddock we should let y/n fight her with no consequences

user8: this has been going on for so long i feel like y/n has a lot to unleash on her

user9: at this point i think all of us y/n fans should be able to get their lick in

user10: i'm new to f1 can someone explain this lore to me? (srs)

user11: y/n and oscar have been together for nearly four years now, they got together when they were like 19. this chloe reed girl went on one date with oscar when they were 17 and now copies everything y/n does to try and get his attention? like down to haircut and tattoos ... it's kinda crazy and y/n has made some references to it but like we're nearing like the third year of this so i think she might snap soon

user12: it's even got to the point where chloe has like started talking with y/n's accent? she has a very obvious accent so like it's INSANE

user13: and to think all of this over a single date SIX YEARS AGO

user14: on a brighter note - y/n was MADE for bangs they look so fucking good

user15: obviously she should stop but if there's anyone you want to look like, it would be y/n

user16: at this point is it even over oscar anymore? or has chloe lost herself to journey to BECOME y/n

user17: the fact that she still camps out under all of oscar's posts and constantly posts in mclaren merch

user18: and don't even get me started with how she's always in the comments of oscar's sisters' comments

user19: someone needs to get nicole to put this girl on blast

user20: remember before elon took away public likes that mark went on a liking spree about chloe being a lil weirdo

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, logansargeant and 1,209,566 others

tagged: oscarpiastri, landonorris & maxfewtrell

yourusername: summer breakin' with my boy (and his boy)

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user24: MAMA THERE'S A BITCH TRYNA BE JUST LIKE YOU 💜

user25: i unfortunately think she's very aware of it

oscarpiastri: i know you love me because you didn't get annoyed about THEM gatecrashing our couples getaway

landonorris: what if we are a couple HUH???

oscarpiastri: max literally has a girlfriend?

landonorris: ur so close-minded osc

yourusername: i love you osc even with these little stray cats you've picked up

landonorris: did we or did we not organise a super romantic dinner for you?

oscarpiastri: i organised a dinner and you two are so fussy that you left to find some chicken nuggets?

landonorris: therefore giving you a romantic evening on the water?

yourusername: you fell in the water trying to get back on board from the tender and i had to jump in and save you after a fish touched your foot and you began to have a panic attack

landonorris: god you do something nice for people and all you get is SHAMED

mclarenf1: you nearly drowned ???

user26: is chloe going to attempt to drown someone so she can claim she also saved an f1 driver

user27: @georgerussell63 alert the GDPA - NO WATER !!!

georgerussell63: understood 🫡

user28: has it not gotten to a crazy point now that we're warning drivers that this crazy girl might DROWN them ???

user29: at what point do we put oscar and y/n is witness protection

user30: the day she manages to get in the paddock me thinks

charles_leclerc: i see our invite got lost in the mail?

yourusername: please refer to whatever the fuck was going above your comment

charles_leclerc: that you're a victim of identity theft?

yourusername: we been known, but BEFORE THAT

charles_leclerc: oh. you should've let lando drown

landonorris: ???

oscarpiastri: i think that might have gotten me fired?

yourusername: no more papaya rules?

chloereed

liked by user31, user32 and 11,045 others

chloereed: summer breakin'

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user33: oh brother this guy STINKS

user34: i am feeling sufficiently creeped out on the behalf of y/n and oscar

user35: i really don't understand her game here though? does she expect oscar to see this and actually mistake her for y/n and leave y/n for her?

user36: at this point i think she's lost in the sauce

user37: also oscar is hilariously down bad for y/n like he could probably recognise her via vibrational field he would not fall for this cheap imitation

logansargeant: this ain't it btw (it's never been it)

user38: not logan tapping in

logansargeant: who gon check me boo? i ain't got a job

chloereed: i don't know what you're trying to say, but i don't appreciate you spreading misinformation and hate

logansargeant: you have literally copied everything about my best friend down to her sentimental tattoos and you've essentially stalked my other bestfriend for nearly seven years ?

chloereed: it's not stalking if i know i'm what he really wants? she's the imitation of me

logansargeant: you like need help

user39: GO LOGAN

user40: bro has been let of the leash

user41: tbf when you think about it, logan has been friends with oscar for years and by default friends with y/n for just as long so like he's probably seen how this has effected them personally

user42: i don't really see how this is such a big deal, people try and imitate celebs all the time ?

user43: i think it's because she knows at least one of them personally and is very viciously pursuing oscar

user44: also there has to be an aspect we don't know because i don't think logan would be publicly taking her on in the comments if it weren't a lot worse

user45: also ... like it probably feels like shit as a person generally to have everything you do copied and not even get a tiny bit of credit

f1

liked by danielricciardo, patooward and 1,784,039 others

tagged: charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 & oscarpiastri

f1: we're ready for you monza

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user46: OMG IS THAT?

user47: i'm being so for real y/n needs to fight her

user48: OSCAR RUNNNNNNNNN

landonorris: do i need to inform the legal department?

yourusername: you might want to give them some sort of heads up

chloereed: why you afraid i'll steal back my man?

yourusername: no i'm afraid i'll get hit with a manslaughter charge

chloereed: that's a threat - my lawyers will be hearing

yourusername: tell them bitch, oscar would still choose conjugal visits with me over ever being with you

user49: came for the fast cars, staying for whatever this drama is omg

user50: i once went on a reddit deep dive about this drama where they compiled all the evidence and holy moly this confrontation has been a long time coming

user51: the best (or maybe worse) thing abotu all of this is that her claim of being with oscar first and dating him when they were 17 is based on one 'date' where is was just a joint ball between their schools where there was a compulsory dance in which they were partners

maxverstappen1: yo this shit is insane

user52: aren't you meant to be in the car in 20 minutes?

maxverstappen1: drama waits for no one @yourusername i got ur back

charles_leclerc: at this point i will mobilise the tifosi @yourusername

yourusername: i can handle her, i might just need some money to fix my nails

oscarpiastri: please do not fight her, she's not worth it

chloereed: she won't fight for your love but i will

oscarpiastri: can you just fuck off

user53: i fear she's pushed them over the edge now lol

user54: i'm glad they're both letting her have it in the PUBLIC INSTAGRAM COMMENTS <3

f1tea

liked by user55, user56 and 34,982 others

f1tea: she's finally done it? chloe reed was spotted in the paddock at monza. will we finally see a confrontation between the two girls?

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user55: i FUCKING hope so

user56: if i were y/n you'd have to hold me back i'm being so serious

user57: i'd be in oscar's mclaren so fast and be driving down the pit lane to look for her

user58: i'd already be in an italian prison sorry not sorry

user59: y/n needs to give me lessons on being this graceful

user60: at this point we should just have an undercard for the race that's these girls tussling it out

user61: at this point i think logan, charles and max are ready to jump in

user62: charles and max being in the comments just before FP getting the scoop is so insane i love them

user63: imagine getting these f1 drivers this pressed over an aesthetic

user64: if you think this is just about an aesthetic you're just being dumb on purpose

user65: but like y/n is just a girl with bangs and a basic look, u could say like half of the female population are copying y/n

user66: but like please look at the actual evidence, it's way deeper than bangs babe

user67: also the TATTOO WHY ARE WE NOT TALKING ABOUT THE TATTOO

user68: whatever happens y/n will always be better than me

user69: she needs to bash her publicly if she won't beat her physically lol

oscarpiastri

liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername and 3,984,022 others

tagged: yourusername

oscarpiastri: please leave us alone, you'll never be her and i don't want you to be

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user71: STUNT ON THEM QUEEN

user72: a man who vocally defends you >>>

yourusername: love you bby

oscarpiastri: if anyone wants to take me away from you they'll have to defeat me in combat

yourusername: not saying i want that but you would be so sexy in full armour

oscarpiastri: for you... i would wear anything :3

user73: bro said his piece and immediately went back to simping like a pro

user74: if he doesn't offer to wear a suit of armour in the bedroom is he really in love with you?

user75: i guess we're not getting any dad!oscar content any time soon

landonorris: ???

user75: it's a joke about protected sex genius

landonorris: OH

chloereed: that's not what you said then oscar

oscarpiastri: THAT WAS SIX YEARS AGO IN A CONVERSATION I WAS OBLIGATED TO HAVE GET A GRIP WOMAN

oscarpiastri: YOU WILL NEVER FEEL SATISFACTION IN YOUR LIFE IF YOU CONTINUE TO COPY EVERYTHING SHE DOES AND REFUSE TO BE YOUR OWN PERSON

oscarpiastri: so PLEASE FOR YOUR OWN SAKE GET YOUR OWN LIFE AND LEAVE US ALONE

oscarpiastri: oh. i'm blocked

oscarpiastri: slay

user76: so ... oscar... when can we get this level of reading on the radio

yourusername: don't make him do community service :(

user77: but him being sassy is a service to the community

yourusername: you make a good point

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 2,045,677 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

yourusername: you can be a copy cat all you like, but you'll never beat the original

view all comments

user78: i am sorry i exist at the same time as you

user79: i know this a whole love post but i have a confession, i am IN LOVE WITH YOU GET RID OF THE AUSSIE

oscarpiastri: 🤨

charles_leclerc: this was a whole saga, i'm happy it's all worked out for you guys but this was hella entertaining - when can we do it again?

yourusername: never again hopefully

charles_leclerc: boring!

yourusername: it literally got to the point that you offered to leave your car keys in a 'special spot'

charles_leclerc: well obviously i don't mean to THAT extent but i just want a bit of drama, let a girl live

user80: shit stirrer charles leclerc i love you

user81: we should've known he was in the trenches with this, the inchident knows no bounds

oscarpiastri: i love you and i'm sorry this happened. but you do slay so i could see why people would want to be you

yourusername: i knew me with bangs would be too powerful 😔

oscarpiastri: you're the most beautiful girl in the world no matter what

yourusername: ugh you have me blushing pretty boy

landonorris: cringe

yourusername: maybe if you copied oscar's flirting techniques you'd actually be wifed

landonorris: i thought we just established that copying is bad

yourusername: trust me, you need the help

user82: i'm glad we've returned to peace with the lando slander

user83: they're power is insane

maxverstappen1: can i say helping you come up with this caption is my community service

yourusername: fuck yes

maxverstappen1: stunting on hoes is very much in the public interest

fin.

note: i'm back in a rhythm !! this is not so subtle so i'll expand here: please please please do not steal my work, idc if you change the driver, if you're blatantly stealing my ideas and concepts - to the point that people are messaging me to make me aware, please don't! or at least credit me rather than pretending this a completely original thought. mamma mia didn't bother me as much because it's obviously the musical's idea, but omg undercover verstappen? big reputation? and guilty as sin - down to the series name? i haven't made any posts about this but know it's very much bothering me and if i see anymore i may have to put it on blast. thank you all for reading, soz for the rant but this has been going on for months.

[bartonomy]

REGULUS BLACK AND THE ART OF LOVING A MADMAN ( WOMAN??)

PAIRING Regulus Black x Crouch!Fem! Reader

SYNOPSIS When you pick a fight with Mulciber (again), get hit with a particularly nasty hex (again), and land yourself in the hospital wing (again), Regulus has to work his usual charm on a professor to clean up your mess. Just another day in his fucking life.

CONTENT WARNING not proofread! ,crouch family slander, reader gets hurt, regulus getting pulled into things, fluff!!

WORD COUNT 1.8k

library.

Regulus Black regretted a lot of decisions in his life.

Most of them involved his family, some of them involved his choice of friends, and at least one of them involved that time Barty had convinced him to try a new spell that had made him vomit slugs for an hour. But on the top among his many regrets, the one that occupied his mind on a near-daily basis and might be the reason why his hair is greying at the ripe age of 16, was the fact that he had somehow, against all logic and reason, fallen in love with you out of all people.

And, unfortunately, the most insane person he had ever met.

“Stop them!” a first year yelled across the courtyard.

Regulus sighed deeply, already rubbing his temples. “Oh, for Merlin’s sake-”

He turned just in time to see you- his oh so lovely, brilliant and slightly deranged girlfriend- launching herself at Mulciber like a particularly homicidal pixie.

“Oh, brilliant,” Regulus muttered.

The duel had looked absolutely pathetic, if he was being honest. Spells were flying. Mulciber’s wand was raised, his face exasperated with anger and annoyance, while you looked totally unbothered, happy even, to be challenged. “You really want to do this, Crouch?”

“You looked at me funny,” you mused, as if that was a reasonable explanation. You showed no sign of actually doing any harm that day,he thinks, much to his surprise.

Merlin's buttocks, I'm getting too used to this mental buffoonery.

As if you could hear his thoughts (well, his steps weren't exactly quiet on the cobble stones), you added, "Care to repeat what you said about me and Barty as well, Mulci?"

Regulus let out a long-suffering sigh. Of course it about Barty. Barty Jr. could get away with murder in front of you, and you would still defend his honor as if he were some kind of noble martyr instead of an absolute menace.

For once, though, he wasn’t involved. He was sitting off to the side, watching the fight unfold with mild interest, completely unaware that his little sister was about to get herself hexed into oblivion on his behalf.

“I didn’t say anything that wasn't the truth, Black,” Mulciber was saying lazily to him. “And you know,” he drawled, twirling his wand between his fingers, “I always wondered how someone as uptight as Barty Sr. managed to spawn not one, but two utter disappointments.”

Regulus felt his girlfriend tense. Beside you, Barty went very still.

Mulciber smirked. “I mean, your brother’s already well on his way to becoming a Ministry disgrace. But you-” He let out a low whistle. “I don’t know if you’re worse because you’re reckless or because you don’t even realize it.”

Regulus sighed. Oh, for Merlin’s sake.

Barty scoffed, looking deeply unbothered. “Well, you would be an expert on family disappointments, Mulciber. How is your Squib cousin, by the way?”

Mulciber’s smirk faltered. His wand snapped up. That was it.

"Sectumsempra!"

You barely dodged it, eyes narrowing. “Alright, you little freak, where the hell did you learn-”

Regulus was already moving, pushing through the gathering crowd of Slytherins who had circled around, waiting for blood. “Protego!” Regulus flicked his wand just in time to deflect the bombarda that was just blasted- your spell, because of course you weren't backing down. No, you were going straight for the kill. “Reggie!” you whined. “I had him!”

“No, you didn’t,” Regulus said flatly.

“Mulciber, you have the nerve to continue this child's play,” Barty Jr. called from the sidelines. He didn’t sound particularly concerned. Mulciber smirked. “the little rat has nothing against me.”

He caught his girlfriend’s eye- “Don’t kill him." you just winked. And then, with a graceful, almost lazy movement, you flicked you wand. “Expelliarmus.”

Mulciber barely dodged. He fired back, sneering- “Stupefy!” You stepped casually aside, as if dodging wasn’t even an effort. “You’re going to have to try harder than that, love.”

Mulciber growled and raised his wand. “Depulso!” You twirled your wand midair defending yourself, as if the interaction was boring you immensely. The force of the impact barely even ruffled your hair.

Barty let out a mocking yawn. “Come on, Mulciber. You hex like a first year.” Mulciber’s face twisted with anger. “At least I have some dignity,” he spat. “Unlike your sister, who has none. It’s pathetic, really. A Crouch playing attack dog for a Black?”

Regulus’s jaw clenched. He looked at his girlfriend, and you were smiling, Not in a nice way. Oh, he was so done for.

You tilted your head, mockingly thoughtful. “You know what’s really pathetic, Mulciber?”Mulciber scowled. “What?”

You only flicked your wand. “Silencio.”

His mouth disappeared, where once his lips were, was now a blank canvas of skin. Mulciber’s eyes widened. He tried to speak- but only muffled words came out.

Barty burst out laughing. “Oh, that’s just cruel, tiger” Mulciber’s face twisted with rage. He furiously swiped his wand to counter the curse- but you didn’t let him. With one smooth, effortless motion, you fired another spell.

“Locomotor Mortis.”*

Mulciber stumbled. His legs went jelly-like, his knees buckling beneath him. Regulus exhaled. “Chéri, are you playing with your food?”

“Obviously.”

Mulciber seethed silently. He furiously gestured with his wand and you deflected the curse midair with zero effort. At this point, he was shaking with fury. His pride- his absolute refusal to lose to a damn Crouch-took over. His eyes flashed and he pointed his wand. A muffled “Confringo!” could be heard as red streaks came blasting towards you.

Regulus’s stomach dropped. The spell hit you square in the shoulder, sending you flying backwards with a sickening crack. “Bloody hell-” Regulus lunged forward, catching you just before you hit the ground.

Your robes were singed, your arm at an unnatural angle that would make a troll wince, and, of course, you were still trying to get back up. “ I swear to my ancestors souls, let me at him, Regulus, before-”

Regulus tightened his grip, pushing you down gently. “You are not dueling with a broken arm.”

You huffed. “I could still win.”

“You could also die,” Regulus snapped. He turned to Mulciber, eyes cold. “Are you quite finished?”

Mulciber raised his hands frantically, gesturing to you and back to barty as if to say 'Hey, she started it!'

Regulus didn’t argue. You had, in fact, started it. But that didn’t make this situation any less infuriating.

“Barty,” he called. “A little help?”

Said boy finally got up from his seat, leisurely strolling over like this wasn’t a life-or-death situation. He peered down at his sister with a critical eye, then shrugged. “You’ll live.”

You groaned. “That’s your concern?”

“You look fine to me,” he said cheerfully. “Besides, I think you got one good hit in." Regulus was going to lose his mind. “You are both insane,” he muttered.

“Thanks,” they said at the same time.

Regulus was already tired. He hadn’t even had breakfast yet. This was supposed to be a normal day. But no, his girlfriend had to pick a fight before 8 AM.

Merlin’s beard, this family was going to be the death of him.

Regulus was not built for this kind of stress. He ran a calloused hand through his pale face, cursing the gods for giving him a reckless bomb of a girlfriend when he once, pathetically, called upon them in his third year.

Meanwhile, Barty- who had been doubled over, laughing at Mulciber from the bed opposite the room, finally spoke, grinning.

“That was brilliant,” he told his sister. “Merlin, I love you. This is why you’re my favorite sibling.”

“You don’t have any other siblings,” Regulus pointed out dryly.

“Exactly!” Barty beamed.

On Godrick's balls, was he tired.

He sat next to your bed, watching as Madam Pomfrey fussed over your arm. The hex had done more than break the bone- it had burned through your sleeve (from your brand new robes, if you might add), leaving angry red scorch marks trailing down your shoulder.

You were delighted by this, and he was flabbergasted.

“I bet it’ll scar,” you said excitedly. “That’s wicked, am I right?”

Regulus pinched the bridge of his nose. “No. It’s not wicked. It’s downright idiotic.”

Madam Pomfrey sighed, already immune to your nonsense. “You’ll be fine by morning, dear. But you’re staying here for now.”

That was fine. That was great, actually. What wasn’t great was the fact that Slughorn was already marching into the room, looking both concerned and exasperated.

Regulus immediately straightened, preparing himself for an hour (more like 10 minutes with the way that mustache of a man rambles) of scolding.

“Miss Crouch,” Slughorn sighed. “Another duel?”

“She started it,” Regulus said quickly, ever the dutiful boyfriend.

His girlfriend shot him a betrayed look. “Regulus!”

Slughorn shook his head. “Detention, I’m afraid.”

Regulus tilted his head, sliding into his usual charming demeanor. “Professor, surely you can’t punish someone who’s already suffered so much.”

Slughorn frowned. “She hexed Mulciber.”

Regulus offered a smile, smooth as silk, looking past the man to the occupied bed with said subject. “And he hexed her back. Quite viciously, I might add. The poor girl nearly lost consciousness in my arms. It was tragic, really.”

His girlfriend scoffed. “I was fine.”

Regulus nudged you sharply under the blanket. “You were barely breathing,” he said dramatically.

Slughorn looked hesitant. Regulus pushed harder.

“I carried her here myself,” he continued, voice just the right amount of pained. “Do you really think she deserves detention after such an ordeal?”

Slughorn sighed, rubbing his temples. “…Very well. But no more dueling.”

Regulus smiled, victorious. “Of course, Professor.” Slughorn gave them one last weary look before leaving.

The second he was gone, you gaped at him “You are actually insane,” you said scandalized and eyes wide.

Regulus smirked. “You’re welcome. Perhaps we can star our mornings not risking our lives and you know, go to the great hall like normal witches, hm?"

You only beamed up to him, leaning back against the pillows. “You love me.”

Regulus exhaled, already exhausted again.

“…Tragically, yes. I do”

[scorpioriesling]

An Enticing Offer

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Pairing(s): Lucien x reader

Warning(s): 18+, mdni, nsfw

Summary: Your roomate was a lot of things; kindhearted, hard-working, handsome... but, he was other things too. Messy. Maybe a little irresponsible. But, most of all -- deliciously, enticing.

SR’s Note: Oye... everytime I write smut, I feel nyyyyassty, LOL. Anywho, many thanks for @hardcoremarvelfan for the request -- I present to you, absolute Lucien filth using prompts #2, #12, #23, #71, and #74 from my promt request list. (; Enjoy.

Tags: @mellowmusings @rcarbo1 @lilah-asteria @kitsunetori @velarisdusk (inbox me or comment if you'd like to be added!)

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

The late afternoon sun streamed through the wide kitchen windows in your apartment, the golden glow illuminating the otherwise darkened space. Heaving the brown paper bag onto the small kitchen table, you sighed. Sure, an apartment that overlooked the Sidra was quite a luxury in your eyes -- but for the amount you paid each month to rent this place (well, paid half of), you'd sometimes wished they'd included curtains.

Add that to next week's grocery list. You kept forgetting to pick some up when you went to the market.

You began removing the miscellaneous items from the bag -- fresh vegetables, canned goods, that disgusting cereal your roomate requested -- and putting them away. When the mid-shelf in your pantry was full, you groaned in frustration; the top shelf was too high to reach, and your very tall, very able roomate would not be home until tomorrow.

Groceries on the table it is. And... maybe, a stepstool, added to next week's grocery run.

You were fortunate enough to secure a place like this, not to mention the roomate that came with it -- you'd met a few years ago and became fast friends, and living together seemed like a wise choice when you'd both finally abandoned your childhood homes.

A good choice indeed; having Lucien around brought you comfort, as you never liked being alone anyways. Not to mention, he was kind hearted, funny, and quite easy on the eyes. You tried to ignore the stir inside when he'd so casually walk around without a shirt on, or emerge from the bathroom in only a towel...

It was his place too, rather.

You groaned in frustration when you spotted the dirty pans on the stove, inspecting the residue on one as you picked it up.

If your roomate was one thing, it was messy.

"Lucien," you grumbled aloud. Tossing the pans into the dishwasher, you shoved it closed and turned on the wash cycle. How hard was that?

This happened quite often; Lucien, not cleaning up after himself. And you, trailing after him with a broom and dustpan.

You paused, listening for another soft sound over the rumble of the dishwasher. Straining your ears, you couldn't quite make it out -- the muffled, mubling sound over the running water.

Brows furrowing in confusion, a flicker of fear coursed through you. Sure, when Lucien was here, you'd never felt afraid in your apartment; but, since he'd left on a particularly gruelling mission only a few days ago, you couldn't help the irrational paranoia that made an appearance every so often.

Taking a timid step toward the hallway, you heard it again -- louder, this time. A soft, breathless sound amid the falling water. Your breath caught in your throat; someone was surely inside your home.

You walked faster, soft steps toward the bathroom door; sure enough. The water was running, and someone was inside.

Had he gotten home early?

"L-Lucien?" You squeaked. Your voice came out less confident than you'd hoped, and your hand shook as you reached for the doorhandle.

"Y/N... oh Gods, yes..."

Your outstretched palm halted. The voice was surely his, but what in the Hell was he doing in there?

"I'm... I'm coming in."

Your voice was barely above a whisper as you grabbed the doorhandle, twisting and shoving inside the small bathing room. Steam blasted against your face, and you coughed once as you waved it away.

The mumblings stopped.

And the shower curtain flew open.

The two of you shared a shout of shock as your eyes met, his face framed by his long, yet soaking, red hair. You both stared at one another in silent surprise for a beat, before both speaking at once.

"What the Hell are you doing here?"

"Why didn't you knock?"

The moment of clarity hits you, and Lucien wipes a hand over his dewy face.

"Y/N... by the Cauldron, why would you come in when I'm literally showering?" Your brows narrow, and you cross your arms over your chest. You don't miss him pulling the shower curtain in front of his body to cover himself -- but it's too late.

Your cheeks pinken.

"I... I didn't know, you were home, yet." You stammer, your cheeks deepening in color. "I heard someone in here, and you were still gone and-"

"And, what, you thought a stranger was using our shower?" Lucien chuckles. You feel your face heating even more, slight irritation bubbling beneath the surface as your friend seems to find this situation amusing.

"Well, I-"

He continues to laugh, raking a hand through his wet hair. Small droplets of water cascade over his shoulders, running down and over the exposed area of his pectoral muscles.

You huff. "If I must be perfectly clear," You glare. "I heard something going on in here other than just the shower." His eyebrows raise in an amused stare as his eyes scan over your face. Your very embarassed, face.

"Uh huh, and what do you think you heard?"

You huff, trying to look anywhere but him as his gaze intensifies.

"I-I thought you weren't even supposed to be home yet," you stammer, attempting to change the topic.

"Got back early," he deadpans. "I just can't believe you really thought it was anyone but me in here." He shakes his head, a small smile on his face.

"I suppose it's because of all the moaning and ... and, and words coming from inside this room." You try to remain confident, but falter as you notice his gaze lowering to your chest. Bad day to opt for a tank top.

"There's nothing wrong with relieving stress -- why is that so unbelieveable?" He quirks a brow.

You feel the familiar swirl inside your abdomen.

You swallow hard. "I guess... it was quite unbelieveable to think you'd be the one in here, saying, and... doing those things." He chuckles, and you catch sight of his erection pushing against the shower curtain. You quickly look away.

"More likely a stanger, than me, hm?" He tuts.

You gulp. "I suppose so."

Its quiet for an awkward moment, you trying not to stare at your half-covered gorgeous roomate as his eyes trail you up and down; so agonizingly slow.

"Y/N... you don't have to pretend to not stare." He chuckles. "In fact, you could join me-"

Your mouth opens in shock. "Lucien Vanserra! You're not seriously suggesting that--"

"Oh, I am." He grins, like a feline about to pounce on a little mouse. You shake your head in disbelief, the swirling in your stomach a full on tornado at this point.

You scoff, folding your arms over your chest once more. "What, you need me to help you?" You ask. He shrugs, moving to close the shower curtain. Taking a timid step forward, you begin to shrug off your shorts before thinking too long about it.

"Only if you're willing," he muses, his voice once again muffled by the cloth.

"What an enticing offer," you quip, glancing to the mirror at your reflection.

Your cheeks burn, the sensation in your abdomen becoming near unbearable. Were you really about to fuck your roomate? So many nights you'd spent together, doing seemingly harmless things; watching movies, reading together, preparing dinner.

Many of those nights, you went to bed with your hand between your thighs.

Pulling back the shower curtain lightly, you let out a nervous laugh as he came into full view. His back was to you, which made it easier to slip in behind him.

He turned, his eyes immediately wavering from your face to trace over every curve you had to offer. His bottom lip drew lightly between his teeth.

"Seems like you could use my help," you chatter, nerves propelling your mouth to move. "If you clean yourself as well as you clean your dishes-"

His hand gripped your waist, the other grabbing the back of your neck as he pulled you to him. His mouth crashed into yours, his lips moving and gliding along yours alike as he devoured your kiss. Your hands found his shoulders, gripping and tracing along the toned muscle there. It was only after his tongue had slipped in that you let out a soft moan, and he pulled back from you.

"Y/N... I-" His words were cut off as you reached between you two, gripping his hardened length that had been pushing against your stomach. His breath caught, and his eyes stared for only a moment where your hand held him before looking directly down into your eyes.

"Please..." he breathed out, his pupils blown wide with desire. You moved your hand up and down, how you'd fantasized doing many times before. You could feel him hardening more in your hand, and he reached one of his hands up to play with your nipple. You gasped, and he leaned back against the shower wall as you sped up your minstrations.

"I... I... oh Gods, Y/N," he breathed out. His other hand reached behind you, his fingers pressing into the curve of your ass where it met your thigh. You smirked, looking up at him in this state.

"You, what, pretty boy?" His eyes opened as he looked to you, doe-eyed and putting on a show. "Can't even finish a sentence as I jerk you off, hmm?"

His brows furrow, his teasing from earlier seeming to finally catch up with him. His one hand leaves your butt, gripping your wrist that pumps him; the other one clasps your throat.

"Don't act so innocent," he growls, and you clench your thighs, his tone sending a wave of heat straight to your clit.

"Get on your knees."

You make quick work of lowering yourself onto the shower floor, the warmed tile pressing against your knees as you sit back on them. His hand grabs your hair in a makeshift ponytail, forcing you to look up at him. His free hand yanks on his erection -- a sight worth salivating over.

"Open that fuckin' mouth."

Happy to oblige, you open, laying your tongue out flat for him to see. He groans, his fist pumping his dick faster.

You lean forward, your tongue meeting the bottom of his length as he removes his hand. You replace it with your own near the base, holding him steady as you lick a fat stripe along his cock. Continuing your teasing, you trace your tongue along the vein running from the base to his tip; all the while lightly circling your hand at the bottom.

"Mmmm... 'love the way you taste," You groan, and gasp when he grabs your head with both hands.

"Don't... stop, the teasing," he pants, pushing your head closer to his throbbing dick. You take one breath before shoving it in your mouth, his tip hitting the back of your throat.

"Fuck," he grunts, as you start moving forward and back along his angry length. You hollow your cheeks, sucking him hard as his hips start thrusting against you.

"Mhm... fuck, Y/N, taking it so good," he groans, his grip on your hair tightening. You move quicker, his hips fucking his cock into your mouth harder and harder -- so hard you gag. He throws his head back with an unrestrained moan, and you gaze up at him through your tear-filled eyes. The sight of him, so vulnerable and needy like this...

You reach your free hand between your legs, your fingers finding the buzzing bundle of nerves near your core. He looks down at you once more, his length twitching inside your mouth.

"Yes... yes, play with that pussy," he gasps, his eyes squeezing shut as he tries to prolong his orgasm. "Fuck... oh, fuck-"

He yanks your hair, pulling your mouth flush against his pelvis as he releases, hot spurts of cum coating the back of your throat. You cough as he gasps, yanking his dick out of your mouth before leaning down to grab your jaw hard.

"Swallow all of it."

You do, gulping before gasping for air. He leans back against the shower wall, smirking at you as he offers a hand to help you up. You reach up, positioning the showerhead so the water hits you directly.

Bathing in the warmth for a few minutes, your breath quickens as your roomate reaches for you, his deft fingers tracing along the curve of your waist before one reaches your throbbing core. Your breath hitches, and you grab onto his shoulders as he looks to you with pure lust in his eyes.

"Lucien..." you say breathlessly. "You... you already came-"

"Mhm," he says, his tone low as he presses a kiss just below your ear. "But you didn't."

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Grim - Striped Ribbon Vignette

"The best time we can possibly have!"

[Ramshackle Dorm – Anniversary Party]

Grim: Wooooah. Ramshackle's all festive lookin' now! Take some pics with the ghost camera, [Yuu]!

Grim: When Ace and Deuce came over with the other first years this mornin', at first I was all, "What's goin' on!?"…

Grim: But looks like they were just puttin' up decorations for "Founding Day." What a bunch of kids, all super excited over somethin' like that.

You don't like Founding Day, Grim?

Grim: I-I didn't say that.

Grim: Night Raven College's a big-shot school that only lets chosen mages in. That means it's a huge deal to go to school here, right!?

Grim: There's no way any student here wouldn't be celebratin' Founding Day!

Well, so, it's great that they decorated everything so nicely for us, then.

Grim: …I guess.

Grim: But it was so crazy with how noisy everyone was. At least everything got done alright, thanks to my awesome leadership, though.

Grim: Didja see how Ace tried to skip doin' actual work, even though he's the one who came all on his own? He tried pullin' pranks on me again today, too!

What do you mean, "again"?

Grim: C'mon, you! Didn't you see him pickin' on me during flight class yesterday!?

Grim: When I was trying to fly on my broom, he tried to get in my way by using his wind magic to tickle me. He's so annoyin'!

Grim: He's obviously just jealous of my magical genius. I'm gonna show him who's the real boss one day!

Grim: Deuce was at least focusing on putting up the decorations, but he kept hanging the letters out of order… He's no better than Ace.

Grim: Oh yeah, that reminds me, the homework answer he gave me the other day was completely wrong and it got Crewel on our case, big time.

Grim: In the end, me 'n Deuce had to stay after for Crewel's special lessons. That guys should really do better on his studies.

I don't think you're one to talk.

Grim: Urgh… H-Hey, I've totally been taking my classes more seriously recently!

Grim: But in History of Magic, whenever Jack sits in front of me, I can't see the blackboard at all.

Grim: Plus, he's always sitting as straight up as he can despite him already being so huge, sayin' he needs to exercise his back muscles even in class.

Grim: If I say somethin' to him, he just says "Sit on [Yuu]'s shoulders" and doesn't budge one bit. He's such a muscle-brain.

Grim: Epel's gotta have the worst of it, seeing as he's in the same class as such a stubborn guy.

Grim: …Actually, Epel'd probably just snap back and pick a fight right away, huh.

Grim: He's a gutsy kid that hates to lose, after all.

Grim: We were sneakin' some food outta the cafeteria together the other day, too. We promised not to tell anyone, either… Boy, that sure was fun…

Grim: …Ah! Shoot, I just told you! That right now is a secret between us, okay!?

Grim: Speakin' of sneakin' food, Sebek's hard to deal with too! He's so stubborn, there's no use talkin' with him!

Grim: A little while ago, I tried just the tiiiiniest bit of some of his food, and he got super mad, yellin' and chasin' after me!

Grim: He just kept coming and he was shoutin' so loud my ears were starting to hurt real bad.

Grim: It was just one bite of his deluxe minced cutlet sandwich… Or was it five? Maybe ten bites?

I should probably apologize to him later…

[Ramshackle Dorm – Anniversary Party]

You look like you're really enjoying your time here at school, Grim.

Grim: Your little grin's creepin' me out, stop it. Well, what about you, then?

1. Every day is a blast, thanks to you.

Grim: Myahaha! Well, that goes without sayin'! Grim: And that's 'cause I'm here watchin' over and takin' care of you every day! Grim: …Good, good, you're enjoying yourself. Eheh.

2. I think I'm exhausted by all the trouble that happens every day…

Grim: My-Myaah!? Grim: What, does that mean you ain't havin' fun hangin' with me every day? I can't accept that! Grim: You'll see just how much I've been doin' for you! Just you wait!

Grim: …But hey, I guess I've gotten used to living in Ramshackle like this.

Grim: We're really doin' pretty good for ourselves in this run-down dorm.

Grim: That downpour the other day caused a huge mess the other day with all those leaks, though.

Grim: The bed and blankets were soakin' wet that I thought we'd have to sleep on the floor…

Grim: But luckily, one of the sofas made it through dry, so that was good. It was small and cramped, but way better than the floor.

Grim: We were able to patch things up with the help of the ghosts, but one day we definitely gotta get the school to cough up some dough to fix everything!

Definitely!

Grim: Yeah! We gotta make sure bein' here at this school's the best time we can possibly have!

[knock, knock]

Grim: Oh! Is that Ace 'n them?

Grim: We promised we'd all get together to celebrate Founding Day outside. I bet there's a feast planned, too!

Grim: Let's go, [Yuu]! Time for an outdoor party! Myaha!

Grim, let's keep at it together.

Grim: !

Grim: …Yeah! I'm definitely gonna keep lookin' after my little hench-human forever.

Grim: You just stick with me, [Yuu]!

Requested by @sweetdelightknight.

[playstation-dreamcast]

hiii!! if u take requests, can i ask for hcs about re characters going to a theme park? I've just had that idea in mind for a while and I'd love to read it :)

Okay I'm going to be super honest with you- at some point this started to really start to dance into crack territory, but it was Genuinely fun! So!

Featuring: Albert Wesker, Chris Redfield, Leon Kennedy, and Piers Nivans

Albert Wesker~

He drove the van here

He’s going to act like he’s just soooo above it all. Like this silly little outing is nothing more than a waste of time and “Don’t we have better things to do?” At the same time, he’s going to be genuinely offended if you suggest leaving without getting a funnel cake

He gets a big kick out of going onto the rides that take your pictures at the end and looking the camera dead in the lens- straight stoned face. He never buys them though- You want him to spend 30 dollars on what essentially amounts to fancy paper with a bunch of strangers on it? Genuinely, with nothing but malice in his heart, you can eat his ass. He just takes a picture of it with his phone and moves on

He is NOT a fan of the mascots. At all. You’d think a guy who's been through The Horrors™ as many times as Wesker has wouldn’t think twice about a guy in a rat costume. You’d be wrong. Something about their dead eyes, permanent smiles, and the fact that sometimes you can see the human eyes peeking out of their mouths just Does Not Sit Right With Him. He’s not scared, no, that would be childish. But he is on guard

At some point- you’re going to have to find a semi dark place while he waits for the migraine meds to kick in. The sounds of screaming children, the bright sun, the heat- sensory nightmare. Let him sit with his earbuds in for a second, he’ll be ready to go again in thirty minutes

He is almost shockingly good at skeeball. He insists to you that he’s never played before- this is in fact his first time at an amusement park after all. You don’t believe him, but you’ll take the giant plushie he won you as a prize anyway

He’s actually a big fan of the Ferris Wheel. It’s one of the last things you guys do, so it’s later at night when you do it. He’s genuinely captivated by the rainbow lights of the fair and the crisp summer air. He even puts his arm around you, which is like third base for him! (/j but also kinda /srs)

Any sort of water ride and he’s out. Sorry, walking around in soaked socks and shoes when you don’t have to genuinely sounds like a nightmare.

At first, he’s reluctant to stay for the firework show. Are you not tired? Have we not done enough? Where do you get this energy from- peepaw needs a nap. But, then they start up and he gets it. The pretty lights, the energy of the crowd. Okay, he sees the appeal

You’re going to have to put up with him blasting Bowie on the way home btw. You’re both tired, but his need for control won’t let him allow anyone else to take the wheel. But, this does come with the rare sight of seeing Wesker actually loosen up a bit and sing along with a song- so really you’re the winner here

Chris Redfield~

Chris brings a very Dad energy to the table. He’s the guy that’s reminding you to put on sunscreen, and take breaks, and drink water- generally just trying to keep you alive. Ironically, he keeps forgetting to do these things himself

Chris is mostly here for the food I'm ngl to you. Where else is he going to get deep fried turkey leg wrapped in a soft pretzel drenched in nacho cheese? No where, it’s not ethical to combine that many flavors anywhere else- let him have this

He’s not actually a huge fan of rollercoasters. He’s happy to hold your bag and wait while you ride them, but he gets enough excitement from his job on a day to day basis. The pacemaker can’t handle much more stress than he already puts in under. (Ignore the previously mentioned turkey leg monstrosity when he says this)

He is a big fan of dark rides though. He likes the story that they tend to tell and that they tend to be. Key word tend. Chris isn’t a coward, he’ll get on the Tower of Terror (may she rest in peace) it just isn’t his favorite thing in the world

So, I feel like we all have that one friend who has The Curse™. You know the one, the one that makes it to where wherever you go to any sort of amusement park, carnival, or outdoor outing it rains? Like, it could be clear blue skies across the board on the forecast, but a downspout has manifested out of nowhere? Yeah, that’s Chris. He’s developed an appreciation for the stage shows because of this, and it’s where his fondness for dark rides was born from. And you thought he was crazy for bringing a raincoat

You know the couples shirts that are horrendously heteronormative? His Minnie, her Mickey; His Beauty, Her Beast, ect ect. You know the ones? He forces you guys to wear those shirts. Only, He’s the one wearing the “Girl shirt” (please hear my eyeroll when I say that) And you wear the “Boy Shirt” (Eye roll, can you hear it? Can you hear me rolling my eyes so aggressively I saw the back of my skull?) Purely because he finds it funny and does not know shame.

Okay, so High Striker: It’s the strong man carnival game. You know the one, hit a target with a mallet, and a ball goes up to ring a bell. You know that one? Okay cool- So that game is rigged by having a mechanism the game master can control to change what amount of pressure is needed to make the ball go up. They can make the game impossible to win, or so easy a child could do it. This is all set up to say that Chris barely got the ball halfway up the bar and you straight up rang the bell. You would think this would hurt his pride- but quite the contrary! He spends the rest of the day bragging about you to anyone who will listen instead

I think Chris carries you around the park when you get tired. That’s it, that’s the point. Doesn’t matter what size you are, he didn’t spend that much time in the gym not to be able to pick up and carry his partner when they’re tired

Chris is actually a really big fan of the firework show. I have a headcanon that Chris is a little bit of a firebug (This is due to my own liberal use of incendiary grenades) so if you’re down to stay and watch the pretty fire fill up the sky- he’s more than happy to join you. That being said, he’s also not going to protest if ya just wanna go home

The ride back is a calm, windows down with classic rock playing kinda ride. He’s already starting to turn red on his nose and cheeks, but that's a problem for tomorrow Chris

Leon Kennedy~

Generally speaking, Leon isn’t really an amusement park type of guy. They’re really overwhelming. But, he’s also just happy to be anywhere you are, and he doesn't dislike them. So here we are!

That being said, he definitely takes pictures with all the mascots cause he thinks it’s funny. Like when the goth kids go and see Santa at Christmas. It’s also definitely to heal his inner child, but you won't catch him admitting to that

If you guys do go to the Rat Park, he spends the entire time being a little bit put off by the mouse’s cult. Grown ass adults competing with literal children will never not be pathetic to him, and he will in fact voice it. What are they gonna do? Pick on someone their own size? doubtful.

He likes a decent mix of rides, but he refuses to go on any roller coasters that have a loop. Yes, he understands they are perfectly safe. Yes, he knows how they work with centripetal force. He’s aware of all of these facts. But you’re straight up not going to logic him out of this one babes

Leon, much like Chris, will eat just about anything put in front of him- he is not picky. He has a side quest to find the weirdest food that the park offers and try it. So far it’s been the turkey leg monstrosity. He did not finish it.

As far as games go he sees them as a bunch of giant, rigged scams that are akin to gambling- without the randomized aspect. Ya just gotta home the game master likes you. That’s why he sticks to the tried and true and never ever rigged claw machine. And he’s shockingly good at it too, he’s serious about getting that off brand Scooby Doo in a fireman costume plushie

I think he would genuinely kill over from dehydration if you weren’t there constantly reminding him to hydrate. I’m sorry, Leon gives me the vibes of a guy who straight up doesn’t drink enough water, ya gotta force it (in a loving way ofc)

I think he’s another victim of the “this is overwhelming and I have a headache” curse. Expect to find yourself at one of the indoor stage shows while he slumped down, sunglasses on and earbuds in, waiting for the ibuprofen to kick in. Would water help this condition? Yes. Will that convince him to drink it more regularly? Probably not

Leon is not down for the fireworks. Like, if you really insist, watching from the car is an option. But he really doesn't want to stick around for the loud booming noises followed by the crowd crush of people leaving. Sorry Dear

He does seem more lively on the way home than he did on the way there, and with a little bit of prodding, you may even be able to get him to admit he had fun!

Piers Nivans~

Piers planned the trip. His family used to take a trip to the Rat Park every year, to say he has this down to a science is an understatement. It’s an art and he is a master. Just tell him what rides you wanna ride, where/what you wanna eat, and if you wanna hit up any of the shops and then leave it to him. 

He’s efficient and keeps a tight schedule, knowing when to get on what rides to avoid long lines and when to do other things. That being said, he’s not inflexible. If plans change or something comes up, he’s generally pretty good at restructuring and planning on the fly. Even though he’s really rather not

Piers is an adrenaline junkie. Unlike Chris, he craves the thrill without the imminent threat of death looming over him. As such, he wants to ride every roller coaster at the park. The more Gs, the better. It gets him out of his head.

He’s also not a fan of the mascots, but in the same way Wesker isn’t. Apparently one time when he caught Cinderella smoking on her break once before they really cracked down on that and the magic was just ruined. Now he just sees some underpaid and overworked employee cooking themselves alive in those costumes and just feels sad

He’s like, lowkey a snob about the food im ngl. Like, all the really popular things everyone wants are great, and if you really want it sure, but there's like, a hundred other places with better food and shorter lines, you gotta trust him on this. And the worst part is: He’s right, the public hypes up the most mediocre things while ignoring the extraordinary

He’s also a big advocate for checking out the stage shows. You don't have to stay for the whole thing, but they’re in air conditioned buildings where you can sit and recuperate, and they actually tend to be pretty good! Well, decent, but it’s a good way to take a break

As far as the games go- he sucks at them and doesn't even try to hide it man. ON a battlefield he’s sharp, with surgeon steady hands and laser focus. You want him to throw a bean bag into a clown's mouth? Completely incapable. You’re not sure if he’s actually just that bad, or if he’s playing it up cause he thinks it’s funny. 

Self appointed Keeper Of The Things. Cards, hotel keys (If ya traveled), IDs, anything deemed important he’s the one keeping track of them. It’s not that he doesn't trust you- it’s more of a “If something goes wrong I only have myself to blame and I’d rather be mad at myself than at you.” Does that make sense? Does anyone else do that? Just me? Okay, well now Piers does too

Piers is neutral to the firework display. Seen one light show, you’ve seen 'em all. But, if you really want to watch them, who is he to tell you know? They are really pretty

If he’s not in the driver's seat, he’s passing out immediately on the car ride back. In his defense, he’s been up since like 4 am planning and getting everything ready, it's almost a miracle he didn’t pass out on one of the dark rides

[slitheringghost]

Snape’s home life

These endless debates about the Blacks’ abuse (whether it existed or how severe it was) are interesting because you know which character we actually have no evidence of being abused by a parent, and especially not physically? Severus Snape.

(Which, for the record, I personally think he was, but I’m just trying to make A Point about fandom interpretations of abuse).

There was apparently a Pottermore article saying Tobias whipped Snape, but that’s completely extracanon, and iirc the article wasn’t even written by JKR. This is what is in actual canon:

Snape staggered; his wand flew upward, away from Harry — and suddenly Harry’s mind was teeming with memories that were not his — a hook-nosed man was shouting at a cowering woman, while a small dark-haired boy cried in a corner. . . . A greasy-haired teenager sat alone in a dark bedroom, pointing his wand at the ceiling, shooting down flies. . . . (OoTP)

This is his dad verbally abusing his mother while Eileen cowers, and Snape cries watching them.

“How are things at your house?” Lily asked. A little crease appeared between his eyes. “Fine,” he said. “They’re not arguing anymore?” “Oh yes, they’re arguing,” said Snape. He picked up a fistful of leaves and began tearing them apart, apparently unaware of what he was doing. “But it won’t be that long and I’ll be gone.” “Doesn’t your dad like magic?” “He doesn’t like anything, much,” said Snape. (DH)

Here again, the focus is on the conflict and fighting between his parents rather than Tobias’s treatment of Snape.

Snape’s response and agitation here certainly indicates a bad home life - but witnessing your father constantly scream at your mother is still extremely scary and traumatizing. And would lead to the child feeling unsafe in the household, regardless of if it was directed towards him. Correct me if I'm wrong, but these are the only canonical allusions to Tobias's abuse that we have. (I suppose Snape's hatred of Muggles is another, but that could happen with far less severe abuse too - i.e. with Tom Riddle).

But there is no confirmation that Tobias’s abuse extended to Snape. (And we don’t even have evidence of Tobias physically abusing Eileen, much less Snape.) “He doesn’t like anything much” does indicate a bad relationship between Severus and Tobias too, but the actual severity of it is ambiguous. And it’s not always necessary that the abuse is inflicted on both spouse and child, and we have a very glaring example of this in canon - Barty Crouch Jr.

Crouch was abusive to and hated his son but deeply loved his wife. We have Barty Jr. saying “He loved her as he never loved me”, Crouch Sr. risking his job and reputation and even the possibility of being sent to Azkaban himself to give Mrs. Crouch her dying wish of freeing Barty Jr., Winky’s ability to guilt trip Crouch Sr. into letting his son attend the Quidditch match using his love for Mrs. Crouch, etc. We even have Mrs. Crouch crying as she witnesses her husband’s cruelty towards her son, just like Snape was crying while he witnessed Tobias abuse Eileen.

While Lily asks "doesn't your dad like magic?", Snape doesn't really confirm that as being true; magic clearly wasn’t banned in the house the way it was for Harry (due to the Dursleys’ hatred of it as much as the Statute), since Snape came into Hogwarts knowing a lot of magic, and it seems like Eileen had taught Snape a lot about the wizarding world as a child, and we see him use it to shoot down flies in his bedroom.

And “He doesn’t like anything much” is MUCH tamer and much less violent of a statement than “My mother had no heart, she kept herself alive out of pure spite”, “How she hated him, what a disappointment he was”, everything Walburga’s portrait says, the abuse getting to the point that Sirius ran away and then was blasted off the tapestry, Walburga blasting her brother off the tapestry for merely helping Sirius financially, Walburga being textually compared to Umbridge, Walburga’s portrait stretching clawed hands as though to tear at people’s faces (a clear allusion to physical violence), etc etc. We have MUCH more detail about the Blacks’ abuse than Snape’s.

So where exactly are y’all getting “Snape’s abuse was worse than Sirius’s/Tobias beat Severus/Tobias was physically abusive and Walburga and Orion weren’t/Walburga and Orion were better parents than Tobias, etc” from? Because it sure as hell isn’t canon!

As I said, I personally view Snape and Eileen as being physically abused by Tobias and think it’s implied in the text, but this shows the double standards for Snape vs. Sirius / view of the Black family as a whole.

(And this matches fandom's constant tendency to portray privilege and abuse as mutually exclusive, and framing severe domestic violence as Something Only Poor People Do And Aristocrats Would Never Because They're Above That. This is not the hot anti aristocracy take that y'all seem to think it is, lmao)

[vole-mon-amour]

This is not a drill: this author has another 30k fic for the same ship. And it's 12:08 am but who cares.

I'm in for a riiide, babey.

found a fic so good, instead of falling asleep, I'm giggling into my plush toy, smiling, and my heart goes

otp so good, I haven't felt this rush in a while.

[racfoam]

I was rereading nynn, as I am wont to do, and I got to the part where Sirius asks Harry if Voldie knows she and Cedric dated and she's thinking in her mind that she doubts if he'd care. Like Harry, have we been observing the same man? Like the man who obsessively tries to get you by his side and calls you his every time he can fit it in a conversation? That man wouldn't care?! BSFFR rn Harry 😂

The cackle I let out. The cackle I cackled. Bless you for this @higanbanabythesea I hope you're enjoying your re-read ❤️

I think Harry thinks/says that bcs she herself is in denial, and (I need to re-read my own story so correct me if I'm wrong here) the graveyard happened like ten minutes ago when she is thinking those thoughts/conversations?

AAAAND I need to-read my own fic. FUCK, idk in which chapter that was when Sirius asked her, in Grimmauld or in the bathroom in 4th Year, OH MY GOD, MY READERS KNOW MY OWN FIC BETTER THAN ME, I AM HONOURED BUT ALSO I am ashamed.

In short, if it was in the bathroom in 4th Year, Harry... She does not know Voldemort well, she cannot read him for SHIT. She is 14, she is terrified, she just got back from the graveyard (where she thought for 99% of the time she was screwed, she thought she was 100% fucked because if Priori Incantatem doesn't happen, she'd get blasted into unconsciousness so all of it was an overall GAMBLE and IF I GO OUT I'LL GO OUT FIGHTING attitude we all know and love Harry for)

Harry is in very very very very very very very deep hole of DENIAL. It will get touched upon in the sequel, and fnnily enough it will be Hermione & Ron who tell her "he has been doing everything in his power to get to you and you think he wouldn't care that you were with Cedric" and Ron adds sr like "Harry, he'd set the entire world on fire if he found out you danced, and even worse — kissed Cedric and were DATING him" Ron knows the most what's up, but Hermione does, too, bcs come on, it's Hermione.

I think, Harry, overall, thinks Voldemort really does not care who she was with, mostly because Voldemort considers her his so any other suitors/past relationships Harry's had aren't important - that's what Harry thinks. Harry thinks Voldemort has 0, absolutely 0 interest romantically in her, or about her other relationships. She thinks all he wants with her is to use her or just get her out of the way and lock her up in a room.

Hell, I still think Harry thinks that. Because... (Points to the Chamber scenario) Yeah, Tom has not shown even then he thinks of Harry as an equal back then.

Harry is working with very very limited information overall. I think she does see it, but she is young and she is fckn TERRIFIED of the other possibilities Voldemort caring about who Harry dates (Harry shouldn't date anyone in Voldemort's mind, mind you, she should let Voldemort COURT her but those two things are I think vastly different in society even in the normal world there is much more formality in courting than in dating) BRINGS.

I think Harry painted this picture of Voldemort according to what other people told her about him, and of what she read in books about him - not that I think there are any people who could write a deep biography of him bcs of how secretive he is and how he doesn't connect with his servants or share his past/personal thoughts with them - and the picture she has is of a cunning, manipulative murderer — a villain, an evil man, a monster in appearance itself, who doesn't give a damn about Harry’s life. And he 100% is that. He is evil. He isn't gonna change. But he cares about her life, and Harry still doesn't get that bcs of DENIAL and FEAR. There is a difference between an evil man wanting to kill her, and an evil man wanting to have her, to be with her.

Harry buries those thoughts very fckn deep, and it's normal for her to do so. Honestly, I'm glad you noticed this! Gave me an excuse to talk about it, hehe.

Also, Harry is canonically the most OBLIVIOUS character in the HP world 🤣 Voldemort can give as many hints, verbal or actions-wise, and it will still go OVER Harry's head and I think that's hilarious. Cedric needed to make a direct direct move for Harry to go to the ball with him ie ask Harry. Voldemort hasn't done a lot of asking, only announcing. Harry is just "oh, he's going on the soulmate ramble again" and just shuts him off 🤣🤣

Thanks for the laugh, and thank you for the ask! ❤️

[scorpioriesling]

Heyy, I just saw your Prompt Request Masterlist. As I scrolled down there I haven't seen one with Cassian yet.

I wondered if you'd like to write a Cassian X reader with 35 + 37 + 41 ? Pretty please?💕💕

Thank you so much for all the lovely content, can't wait to read more from you✨

Sing To Me

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Pairing: Cassian x Siren!Reader

Warning(s): mentions of blood / war

Summary: Your escape turns out to be more than you ever could've imagined. Leaving behind your old habitat didn't necissarily mean leaving old habits; what will happen when you put them to the test in order to save a gorgeous bat-in-need?

SR's Note: I'm so excited for this ask -- and you have to follow my tangent here, alright. I know this concept is a little funky maybe, but I hope you enjoy it and how it ends! I had a blast writing it for you. This uses prompts #35, #37, and #41 from my masterlist! xoxo Tags: @cynthiesjmxazrielslover

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Love was never easy. You knew that, in your long life of 478 years. You'd come to accept that over time, you may never fully experience life the way you'd dreamed you would -- you were destined, doomed to the worst fate in Prythian. A fate not many would ever understand.

Until you'd met him.

Another bitterly cold day under the water in the bog, the near pitch-blackness of it impossible to see through to the naked fae eye.

Good thing you weren't fae.

The other sirens swam about, but the heat of their bodies didn't provide any comfort as chatter of the looming war chilled your blood to the core. The others spoke as though this was a mere form of entertainment -- but not you. You found it hard to relate to others of your kind, ever longing to look like the beautiful mermaids and water wraiths that dwelled in the glittering waters of the courts. But, you were bound to this bottomless, dirty, dark pit for eternity.

When the war had finally begun, you knew it was a chance to escape. This, you decided, would be your way out.

You'd followed the stream, tail whipping violently through the murky waters for what felt like days on end. You didn't stop, even if it meant taking a slower pace at times. You left your belongings, only sparing the necessary healing items you may need.

If you were swimming into battle, you'd surely find those in handy.

After ages upon ages, the water began to thin, the dark, muddiness of it fading away as chrystalline waters beckoned for promise ahead. Even halfway between the dank water and the clear blue of the ocean, you'd found it hard to adjust your eyes to the blinding light from above. You were more adapted to the cloudy skies of the bog whenever you felt corageous enough to break the surface of your home lagoon, but this... this was so clear and vast that it took effort to adjust to the change.

When all of the filth had subsided, you noticed a few dark tendrils floating alongside you. They shone beautifully in the light, the sun reflecting upon them, framing each hilight and contour. Your hair. It was beautiful, the muck washing away with each movement of your head.

Gods, it'd been ages since you'd seen a mirror. The broken glass you'd kept didn't work too well in those murky waters.

Looking down, you decided you were quite alluring. The black pearls that stretched over your shoulders, covering most of your breasts only accentuated your moon-white skin. The feathery, ink-black tail that powerfully bobbed behind you... you understood now, why sirens were the ones that could call to any male and get an answer, not mermaids.

The water was glinting with sunlight, but as you kept swimming, you noticed odd shapes floating within. First, a trunk floated by. Then, a few red fruits bobbed along as you continued on your way, gripping your black fishnet bag tightly.

You finally understood the reasoning for the odd objects as you continued your trek.

Pieces of splintered wood cascaded around you, one piece pricking your finger when you reached out to grasp it. Ouch. But more than that, the water was rather... disturbed, ahead. Splashing from the surface indicated as much, and with every stride closer, you could hear roaring, voices, screams-

Splash!

All of a sudden, an anchor was being lowered just in front of you. The heavy iron had your eyes wide as it sank to the ocean floor, and peering up at the surface, you saw more than just the sunlight casting glow after glow throughout the water.

More items began breaking the surface, sinking heavily all around you. First, a bed. Then, random broken bits of china that looked as sharp as the wood. No touching.

A body.

Two.

Blood everywhere.

Your pupils dilated, the scent of blood filling your nose as male after male drifted along, blood pouring from them in delicious crimson waves. The sight was mouth-watering, the lurch in your stomach almost too much as you realize you hadn't feasted in days-

No. That wasn't why you'd come. You came to help, to change your ways -- eating those you'd hoped would accept you wouldn't do you any good. Though they were already dead...

You violently shook your head, longing to clear your mind from the insatiable, hungry, ravenous plaguing thoughts. Loud echoing sounded from above, almost lous enough to hurt your ears. You winced, drawing closer and closer to the surface.

Sploosh!

You rear back, your hands flailing wildly to avoid the sinking ship before you. The flags pulled in water with their wake, threatening to tangle you up and drown you had you not swam away. The wood of the ship's architecture cracked, sinking under it's own weight slowly. You would make out the gold lettering on the side as it fell.

N.

ES.

T.

A.

Hmm.

You swam above it, watching as the Nesta fell slowly, the large explosions above the water pinching your eardrums. You closed your eyes hard, bracing for the shock, waiting to break the surface-

Your eyes flew wide as you gasped for air, your lungs filling with smoke. The scent, the air, all of it; you choked, couching and wheezing as you treaded to keep upright. When you finally cleared your lungs, you looked around, really looked. So many ships, so many warriors on them, so many-

Bang!

Another explosion sent a ship up in flames, and you crossed your arms before your face to sheild from the blinding light. Screams all around, so much pain...

"Cassian!"

You heard the screaming before you saw him. A bird, a bat -- he fell from the sky, large wings crumpling and broken as he headed for the water. You knew this was it. You had to go, you had to go now.

You couldn't swim fast enough and watched as his body cascaded into the water before you. Too far. He was too far. You swam faster, coming to the surface to look for him. Surely, he'd fallen near here? You couldn't miss an enormous pair of wings, but... no matter where you looked, you only saw broken bodies and shattered wood. No him, anywhere.

You dorve underneath the surface once more to continue swimming, but that's when you spotted it -- those mangled, shredded wings drifting delicately in the water. You frantically swam to him, reaching to grab him, help him, but he fell out of reach.

He was sinking.

There was no way you'd get him back to his ship, you couldn't even leave the water; and he was too heavy.

You wrapped your arms beneath his shoulders, wrapping tight before kicking your tail with all your might in an attempt to bring you both back to the surface. It worked, a little. You slowly made your way up, his wings as fragile as a jellyfish tentacles. You made sure not to touch them.

When you finally broke the surface once more, you gasped, hauling him over a flat piece of wood and turning his face to yours. Gods, he was glorious. Your hand searched for his heart, a pulse to reassure you he wasn't dead -- you found nothing.

Panic set in, and you racked your brain for what to do in a situation like this one. You weren't used to healing or helping the fae -- usually, you would simply lure them in and have them for dinner.

Healing. That's what you needed to do.

A tidal wave almost pushed him off the wood, but you clung to him in an attempt to keep him grounded upon it. Thinking quickly, you shoved the mass, steady enough to keep him afloat but quickly to avoid being seen, avoid any more destruction. Land, you'd thought. He needed a stable place to rest, for you to work -- the shoreline.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

"Cauldron damned, you better be worth saving."

You grumbled as you hauled him ashore, as far out of the water that you could reach without completely exiting it. It took massive, exhausting effort to get him here, but the deserted coast would be perfect for your attempt to revive him.

You slung your bag off your shoulder, the action slashing wet sand onto his cheek. You grimaced, reaching out to brush the wet sediment off. Your fingers lingered only for a moment as you stared, his handsomely carved features stunning you.

Heal him.

Right.

As you began digging in your bag, a strangled cough sounded beside you. Your eyes fixated on him as his chest heaved, a more sound cough echoing in his throat. He kept going, coughing, gasping, reaching for air-

Then he slowly opened his eyes. The milky chocolate brown orbs roamed wildly, first taking in the sky, then double-taking when he saw you.

"H....Holy SHIT!" He shouted, frantically pushing up onto his elbows and staggering backward. You flinched, a little afraid something like this would happen. His chest heaved wildly, his wings attempting to flare but only resulting in a pained groan and a hand on his ribs.

"It... it isn't good to move around in your condition," You offer, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. His eyes tracked the movement, growing wider and wider at the touch.

"What are you... who are you?" He asks, his hand still bracing his side.

"I'm... here to help you," you say, and his face contorts in pain.

"What?"

"Lie back down." You say, pushing lightly on his shoulder. To your surprise, he doesn't argue, but simply lies on his back, groaning with the movement. You move close again, leaning over him to get a good look.

"I... I think I can help, with your wings," you say. His nostrils flare as pain crashes through him again and again.

"Why." He asks lowly. Your brows knit.

"Why... why what?" You ask, reaching for the seaweed salve you'd brought. You extemd a hand to apply it, and he jerks backward, his steely glare holding yours.

"Why are you helping me." He grits out. "Why are you?"

"Y/N, is my name." You say, and he looks you up and down, at the tail curling into the water behind you.

"And you're... a, what? Healer? Mermaid?" He quizzes.

You sigh heavily. "Something like that."

He sits straighter, his gaze softening only slightly. "How do I know you're not working for Hybern?"

You knit your brows again. "High Who?"

He reads your expression, the corner of his lips tilting upwards. "Nevermind," he says, scootching closer. "You said, you have something to make it," he winces in pain again. "Better?"

You nod, showing him your balm. "Yes I do," you say. He sighs, contemplating his choice. Finally, shaking his head, he extends his wing to you slightly.

You press your fingers to his wing, near the tip of it and run them along the spine gently. Turns out, his wings are not feathery -- they're quite leathery. Strong.

He groans in pain again, and you gulp as you scoot closer, your hip touching his in the sand.

"What is your name?" You ask politely. He glances to you, and you suck in a breath. Gorgeous.

"Cassian," he answers, and you trail your fingers lower, brushing the weeds closer to the base of his wings. He continues to flinch in pain, and you try your best to distract him.

"From?"

"The Night Court." You nod solemnly.

"I've heard of it. The Cursebreaker; the High Lady, she dwells there." He nods, chuckling a bit.

"She sure does."

It's quiet for only a moment as you reach for the wing on the other side, not quite finding it with your fingers.

"And you?" He asks. His eyes meet yours, and you realize how close you'd become to his lips. So... decadent, practically begging to be chewed-

"Where do you dwell?" He asks. You shake your head lightly, repositioning to sit on his leg to better reach the other wing.

"I'm from... a few places." You settle on, and he shakes his head slowly.

"So mysterious. A pretty, dark-tailed lady comes to my rescue, and won't even tell me where she's from?" You blush, his kind words to foreign to your ears. He thought you were pretty.

"Well.. uh, why thank you." You blubber. He chuckles, his straight white teeth gleaming in the setting sun. Your pupils begin to dilate.

"What would help you relax?" You ask, adjusting your position but only slipping right onto his lap. His large hands grasp your exposed waist, steadying you but not your racing heart. And... mind.

"Well, my best friend's mother used to sing to me when I was young and in need of comfort," he suggests. "Always calmed me down."

Sing. Gods, this was going horribly.

"I... can't sing." You lied. His hands held firm as you continued to work the balm across his wing, and you couldn't help but feel flustered.

"Oh, neither could Rhys' mom," he huffed a laugh. "I promise I won't judge, even if it really is bad," he shrugs, his deep eyes peering into yours.

You gulped. Maybe, if you sang with no ill-intent, you wouldn't seduce him? He wouldn't fall into your gift-given trap, as all the other males did?

"Well, singing you shall have then, Cassian." You cleared your throat, and he looked up at you with a small smile. You began your song, singing with more love and affection than hunger and desire. You could only hope he would respond well.

You hadn't realized your eyes drifted closed until the end of your tune, and you opened them slowly to look to your new companion.

"That. Was. Beautiful." His arms wrapped around your waist, his hands pulling you closer to him. You squeaked, gripping his shoulder for stability.

"No, I-"

"Y/N," he said, his voice more gravelly and low than before. "You absolutely can sing. You're a good singer." He smiled lazily. Great. Your attempt to give him the benefit of the doubt didn't work.

"Thank you," you responded, scooping the last of the salve from the tin to spread over his wings. When you went to rub it on, he moved it out of reach. Your brows knit, and you looked at him to see a playful smirk on his face.

You reached again, only for him to move back at the last second. You scowled softly, turning your attention to his face once more.

"Cassian." You warned, and he chuckled brightly at you.

"You gotta... be quicker... than me," he drawled, his hands rubbing up and down the exposed skin on your waist. You lunged for his wing, almost getting it before he reared back again.

"Cassian!" You reprimanded. "Do you want me to heal you or not?" You said sternly. He only howled, laughing and smiling happily while looking up at you.

"Ahh, Y/N," he sighed. "You're cute when you're angry."

You rolled your eyes, but the blush in your cheeks told a different story. His fingers trailed up, brushing against the skin of your shoulders as he looked longingly, lustfully at you.

"You know... actually, we would make a really cute couple," he chuckled again, and you shook your head at his nonsense as you attempted to move from his lap. His rather... hardening, lap.

This was not good.

"Cassian, come on, let's get you into the shade so you can sleep this off, okay?" You said kindly. His fingers traced along your jawline, brushing a piece of damp hair behind your ear.

"I will... if you admit you're a good singer." He smiles cheekily.

You groan. "Ughhh, Cassian, please, will you just shut up and-"

"Kiss me already." He whispers, his gaze fully entranced on you. His pulse was prevalent, his neck vein throbbing as he leaned closer. He looked so damn delicious, you could almost take a bite-

You gently caress his face, pressing his lips to yours. Your insides knot, the hungry feeling rising as he moves his lips against yours. You almost break when his tongue slides against your bottom lip, but keep it together enough to pull away. His pupils are almost as blown wide as yours.

"Y/N-" he groans.

"We need to get you to the shade," you insist.

"I wanna kiss you again," he whines. A small smile plays on your lips at his words.

"Soon," you say, kissing his temple.

As soon as you sleep this spell off, anyway.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

[backslashdelta]

I did it but at what cost?

Imagine if I were a version of me who would get up from her warm cozy comfy couch and go be productive. That would be so cool.

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Floyd Leech - Playful Dress Voice Lines

Playful Dress Floyd does not have a vignette.

Summon Line: Huh, this is an amusement park? Neat, it's got a ton of weird attractions so I'm gettin' pretty excited.

Groooovy!!: Aha, this amusement park's totally awesome and way too much fun! I ain't nowhere near done playing yet!

Home: Let's have a ton of fun today～

Swap Looks: Nooow it's gettin' pretty interesting.

Home Idle 1: That little Catfish-chan just stares blankly at me even when I threaten to squeeze him. Lame.

Home Idle 2: We're at an amusement park, so just go wild. We can deal with everything else later, it's fine.

Home Idle 3: We lost Jade? That's fine, he's probably having a blast on his own somewhere out there.

Home Idle - Login:  Hey, Shrimpy-chan, what attraction should we start with? I'm good with whatever, like the rollercoaster or the free fall ride.

Home Idle - Groovy: Here, Shrimpy-chan, you can have my fries. Nah, you don't gotta thank me. I just couldn't finish 'em 'cause I just slathered something spicy all over it.

Home Tap 1: Y'know, I really like big and hefty shoes like these～ I love the way they make big, strong stompy sounds when I walk～

Home Tap 2: Ahaha, the water ride is awesome! Just seeing everyone come off the ride completely soaked is the best!

Home Tap 3: Seal-chan's just been quietly stuffing his face with food for a while now. I wonder if he'll be louder and scream if I take him to the haunted house～?

Home Tap 4: What, can the go-carts only ride on the rails? It'd be way more fun to jump the track and take some shortcuts.

Home Tap 5: Huh? I ain't ridin' that lame attraction. C'mon, we came all this way, so we gotta conquer all the thrill rides!

Home Tap - Groovy: Aha, they got pancakes that look like the face of this park's mascot. I wonder what part I should nibble off first～

Requested by @thelonepearl.

[salttoons]

Hi sigu,,,,,,,,,,,

Anyway imagine sigclair but they're both jealous of each other, one vaguely but the other very prominently. Like sigkin hating how carefree eclair can be at times, how happy she is when he has to handle the burden of the world exploding on him but then eclairs side she doesn't know what she did to make him mad at her though, he's got everything anyway, the powers, the titles, the recognition, everything. Eclair doesn't have squat, nothing, from her absolute genius but Sigkin kicked a few robots and now he's suddenly a hero? No one trusts a drug lord yeah but will they ever actually stop and listen? Dude I don't know what I'm talking abt I'm blasting music through my headphones and it's freaking with my focus,,,,,,,,,,,

OH MY GOD??? OH MY GOD?

MERDE ARE YOU SRS DUDE… IM THINKING. IM RHINKING ABOUT IT OHHH NOOO EKUSIG IS HECKING DOOMED!!!

NO NO NO YOU WERE COOKING YOU WERE ACTUALLY COOKIG IM SO INVESTED IN THE SHIP I (probably) CAME UP WITH OHHH MY GOD THIS IS SOOOO OSOOOSODOO AAAAGHEHSHAHHHEHZ???? /VPOS

I have nothing to add… they’re just very freaking insane in their own way… oh they’re so bad they should never be together /j

[neverwalka1one]

Magnus Protocol 20

Bite me Alice, I'm getting out the red string.

Me cackling at Celia's 'are we sure the Institute didn't deserve to be blasted out of existence? Because it probably definitely did. So much. How do I know? IDK. ...

The institute killed JFK didn't it. DIDN'T IT?

Alice... is terrified of the protocol. WHAT DO YOU KNOW, ALICE? Don't give me this vague 'don't poke the government' crap, you poke the government on the daily just by coming to work.

Hey, Ink5oul has a name! Welcome to the chat, Grace! OMG she has such a mean girl vibe I love it. She also sounds a lot Jude Perry when talking about the power she has. Same purr. Which is awesome, because Jude was definitely mentally stable.

'The mean comments hurt' ... Oooh, I sense a theme methinks.

... I gave in to temptation and googled Prince Albert and tattoos. ... I mean, he got it pierced, evidently, good for you Queen Victoria, but. IDK if it was tatted, though the article I found suggested both of them had 'intimate' tattoos. ... I need some bleach.

At least we now know why Grace is digging up people. Does not make it any less creepy. Now go graced (hah) with the image of her cracking open a casket and finding a strip of perfectly preserved skin over a moldering corpse. Great.

So, hear me out: If this is how Gwen dies, it's because she's a classist idiot. She knows she's trying to recruit Grace as an external. She knows externals are several shades of terrifying. SHE'S MET TERRIFYING EXTERNALS and has wanted security when meeting them. So tell me why she took that particular tone, which she would have never dreamed using on Lady 'omg she's married to a peer' Mawbrey. Yeah hun, you're getting a tattoo.

Also (credit to @yraelviii), that was a statement. Gwen asked a question, and got a statement. And now in true archivist fashion she's gonna get marked up by a pissed-off power-happy person

Bye Gwen! (but for srs NO not Gwen she has a thing with Alice I need more of that come back here)