#I'm so overwhelmed by how nice everybody is!

[sysig]

It started with a whisper ♥ (Patreon)

[trianglegoddess]

I'm Still Standing

The League felt like they had a strong sense of Phantom’s power. After all, they wouldn’t have asked him to join the team, otherwise. He’s strong, he can fly, and due to his supernatural nature, he’s amazing on recon and stealth missions. He’s also incredibly reliable, and smarter than most people give him credit for. He’s a natural hero, a more snarky Captain Marvel, some news outlets have been saying. Always saving people with just the right words to say, with a humble smile on his face. 

Phantom, with all of his power, seemed untouchable in every definition of the word. 

And then they got invaded by Darkseid. 

It wasn’t the first time Darkseid had invaded Earth, but it was the first time bringing armies so large, the first time he’s attacked all over the world to spread the League thin. It is single handedly the worst alien invasion Earth has ever had. 

Batman, bleeding out on the sidewalk, Wonder Woman knocked unconscious and restrained by a nearly egregious amount of henchmen, Superman, weak from the kryptonite Darkseid had shot him with. Thankfully it had missed all the important bits, but with that bullet inside of him, Superman was also down for the count, as well as dozens of other League members. 

If it hadn’t been for Phantom, they would have lost. 

Phantom, who’s never been seen without a smile on his face until now. Phantom, who’s never had so much as a scratch on him, until now. Phantom, who has only ever been known to be kind and compassionate, even to his villains, until now. 

Usually there’s this sort of warm, comforting feeling that radiates from Phantom. It feels like a nice breeze on a warm summer’s day, a nice cup of hot cocoa, your favorite song. It’s a feeling of safety, as if everything will be alright just because he’s there. 

Here, though, something else, something much stronger, is radiating from him. It practically rolls off of him in huge waves, making those conscious around him more aggravated, more on edge.

Phantom pulls himself off of the ground. His suit is torn, and his green blood splattered on himself and the ground. He spits a glob of it out, along with a tooth. 

“Still, you stand,” Darkseid says, as if tired. “Do you not tire in the face of your own demise?”

“As long as I’m still standing, you won’t ever win,” Phantom says. His voice is low and threatening, reverberating eerily off of the broken infrastructure that surrounds them. It sends a chill down everybody’s spines, though if Darkseid is affected, he doesn’t show it. 

“Your comrades have fallen, your militaries have failed, and you have no other help arriving. Pray tell how one singular human will be able to take me down!” 

Phantom doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he walks forward so that his friends are behind him, and braces himself. Darkseid, unable to contain his own hubris, lets Phantom come closer. 

Phantom takes in a deep breath, as if he’s about to speak.  

Instead he wails. 

Any remaining glass shatters, raining down upon them as green sound waves push back the offending forces. 

And it’s loud, of course. The ears of Darkseid’s minions are bleeding, and many of them are either dying because it’s too much for them to bear, or they’re killing themselves to give themselves some modicum of relief. But it’s also more than that, more than noise. 

It’s mourning. 

The first feeling that overwhelms everyone is anger. Phantom’s anger at Darkseid, at the destruction, at the fact that he just can’t catch a fucking break and it’s not fair. The second, is the sadness. It weighs down upon their shoulders, suffocating them like smog. It invades every part of their being-their lungs, their joints, their very hearts-and it presses and presses and presses until there’s very nearly nothing left. 

Phantom still pushes on. He is nothing if not persistent, driven to fight, driven to protect his people, his team, his friends, his family. No mortal being could ever hope to have a lung capacity like this, but Phantom is no normal mortal, and Darkseid is finally starting to come to terms with that. 

The last wave of overwhelming emotion is more of an idea than it is an actual feeling. It’s not a threat, per se, but a promise. A promise to do everything in his power to destroy Darkseid and his forces permanently and with prejudice. A promise that no matter how hard Darkseid fights, he will not win. 

A promise that, if knocked down, Phantom will stand back up, and he will not lose. 

Eventually, after what feels like eternity, the wail dies down. There isn’t a single member of Darkseid’s army that’s still on their feet or in the air. Phantom collapses down to one knee, and bright, white rings flicker around his person for just a moment, before he wills them away and stands back up. 

It’s less walking towards Darkseid, and more stalking. They are not on equal footing. Phantom is the predator in every sense of the word, his anger and grief still radiating off of his body in ways that Darkseid is unable to comprehend. 

“Do you yield?” Phantom asks. His eyes are blazing green, burning into Darkseid’s very soul. It is a sort of animalistic, primal instinct deep within him that tells him, run, run as fast as you can. Darkseid’s hubris, however, remains unmatched. 

Even as he stares Death in the eye. 

“I do not,” Darkseid says. He tries to get to his feet, but his body won’t listen, still weighed down by the effects of Phantom’s wail. 

“Then as Phantom, King of the Dead, I hereby condemn you for the rest of your afterlife.”

“Don’t count your eggs yet, boy,” Darkseid spits. “I’m still alive.”

“No,” Phantom says, in a tone adjacent to someone who’s giving their condolences, “You’re not.”

Phantom gestures beside them, and Darkseid spares a glance and sees…Himself. 

His corpse is splayed on the ground, blood spurting out of his ears, nose, and eyes. He stares lifelessly up at the sky. The blood is still leaking down the sides of his face. 

“You’re dead now, Darkseid, and therefore under my jurisdiction. Due to your extensive list of crimes you will not receive a hearing, just your eternal damnation for the sins you’ve committed.”

Phantom waves his hand, and green chains and manacles appear on Darkseid’s wrists and ankles before he’s dusted out of existence, sent to his eternal punishment in another dimension. 

As soon as he’s gone, Phantom collapses to his knees. 

He’s not sure how long he’s there, sitting in the blood of those he’s killed, before Wonder Woman comes over. She’s covered in gashes and bruises and blood that isn’t hers, but she still stands tall and proud. A battle won is a reason for celebration, after all. 

He glances behind her, sees Superman taking Batman into his arms and flying off. 

Diana doesn’t ask him questions about how he’s feeling. A victory is a victory, sure, but not without its price. 

Instead, she holds out her hand. Danny grasps it, and allows her to help him to his feet. 

“As long as you can stand, you can win,” Diana says. “I think I’ll have to use that for my next big speech.”

“By all means,” Phantom tells her. “Just be sure to credit me.”

“Deal.”

[sydwritess]

Saudi Arabia

Lando Norris x fem!reader

Summary: Lando is having a good time in the Sadui race. He had been doing great in the free practices until it came down to qualifying, where he crashes out.

First Person POV

Lando had invited me to his race in Saudi Arabia. It was good so far, some of the free practice race's were at night, which made it a more different of an experience.

Lando had a good run with the free practices, scoring second place in FP1, and in FP2 he scored scored first place.

He had just gotten done with FP3 scoring first place again after a tough race. Right now he was up on the podium, getting his picture taken with Oscar and George.

When everybody was done getting their pictures in, they all came down from the podium, Lando making his way towards me.

Helmet in one hand, the other fixing his curls.

"Hey. Great job out there." I said smiling at him.

"Thank you." He said, pulling me into a hug.

"You doing okay?"

"Yeah, just tired. It was a long race." He said, sitting down on a bench near the garage.

"Here." I said, handing him his water bottle.

"Thank you." He said, smiling.

"Lando!" Zak called out. "Let's go, media's waiting." He said.

"Ugh, do I have to?" Lando whined, throwing his head back against the wall.

"Yes, let's go." Zak said, walking back to the media tent's.

Lando Scoffed. "I'm sorry." He said, grabbing my hand while sitting up.

"It's okay, it's your job." I said.

"I know. I just want to be with you." He said, leaning down and giving me a kiss.

"You will. Now go to work before you get yelled at." I said, smiling. He slightly laughed and then walked out of the garage.

I followed him slightly, keeping my distance as I watched him near the tent. Multiple interviewer's asking multiple questions. One specifically caught my question.

"So Lando." The guy says. "We've talked about the race, the car. What about y/n. The fans are wondering if she'd show this weekend." He asked.

"Yeah. She's here. She doesn't really like to be in the spotlight, like others, so... yeah. She's here for me this weekend, and if she wants to respect the time that I have here, I will let her." Lando said, smiling.

"Right. We just thought we'd ask." The interviewer said, giving off a half smile.

"That's alright." Lando said. He went off to the next interviewer, asking almost the same questions as any other. And finally he went off to the fans.

Many fans having plenty of stuff for him to sign.

"Thank you for the support. I'll see you tomorrow." Lando said, signing the last thing before walking to the garage.

"Right, where were we." He smirked, sitting down.

"You were telling me about how good of a racer you were." I teased. There was a moment of silence between us. Each of us holding our gaze's.

"Did you see that one guy? Asking me about you?" He asked me.

"Yeah." I said.

"Sorry. I... just wish they'd leave it alone." He said, I looked at him calmly.

"That's not- I didn't-"

"I know what you meant. But it's okay. Like you said, I'm not here to steal your spotlight." I said.

"I know. It's like they want me to prove your here for some reason."

"I get that. Fan's coming to quick conclusions. But I'm here for you now." I said, grabbing his hand.

"Want to go around the paddock?" He asked.

"Yeah, of course." I said, standing up with him. We walked around the paddock hand in hand for a while. The paddock was unusually quiet, seeing how everybody was outside.

"This is nice." Lando said quietly.

"It is. Nobody around." I said.

"No... I meant this." He said, holding up our hands. I look up at him slightly.

"Your just... so calm. I'm always surrounded by a bunch of fast-paced people. It's nice to just be in the silence for a moment. Not being bossed around." He said.

"I know. It can get really overwhelming at times." I said.

"Very." He said, his lips curling into a smile. We walked around for a while until it was time to go back to the hotel, where we fell asleep together.

The next morning I woke up before Lando, who was peacefully sleeping besides me. I got an outfit out of the hotel dresser, quietly walking to the bathroom to get changed for the day. I did my hair, putting it in two Dutch braids before going back into the main room, walking over to Lando's side of the bed.

"Lando." I say quietly, shaking his arm. He moves a little bit but doesn't wake up.

"Lando." I say louder.

"What." He says tiredly, opening his eyes.

"You need to get up soon, your going to be late." I said.

"Ugh, it's so early." He said.

"Lando it's twelve o' clock." I said. He slowly got up out of bed, walking over to the dresser to get his clothes.

He quickly got changed and did his hair, walking out trying to fix it. He gathered the rest of his stuff in his backpack and we both made our way out of the hotel.

"You ready for today?" I ask as Lando drove to the circuit.

"No. Nervous actually." He said.

I grab his hand gently, bringing it over the center console. "You'll do great today. I just know it." I said.

"Thank you." He said, quickly looking over at me and smiling.

We got to the racing circuit and walked in through the workers entrance. Lando goes to his drivers room to set his bag down and then we make our way to the pit wall.

"Norris. Your on time." Zak said, turning in his chair to face us.

"Yeah. I got a good alarm clock right here." Lando said, swinging an arm around my shoulder. I smile slightly.

"You ready to go over strat's?" Zak asked. Lando nodded and sat at the pit wall with Zak, going over strategies for a good three hours.

"Now remember, turn four will be tricky. So turn the car just right and you will glide through." Zak said, mimicking the track with his hands.

"Alright. Thank you." Lando said. walking back over to me.

"Are you feeling better?" I ask.

"Yeah. Hopefully it goes well." He said smiling.

"You need to stop being so hard on yourself Lan. You've got this. You've won plenty before and you can do it again." I said. He didn't respond, just looking at me deeply.

"I love you." He said.

"I love you to." We sat in the garage for a while, people passing by Lando, giving him strategies, updates about the car, everything for a good race. Eventually it got dark out.

"You ready kid?" Zak asked Lando.

"Yeah, I'm ready." He said, his helmet in his hands.

"You'll do great. Don't overthink this please." I said to Lando.

"I know. Will you be on the radio's?" He asked.

"Of course I will." I said, hugging him before he got into his car, driving up to the first starting spot.

It was dark out, but the track was well lit with many stadium lights on the side of it.

The five red lights going out, the drivers all sped down the track, taking many turns at a time.

Lando was doing good, holding first place throughout the race. Oscar staying right on his tail. The night sky was getting darker, and the moon finally began to shine over the track.

Lando was nearing the end, only 20 more laps to go. I was watching him from the computer screen in the pit wall.

10 laps to go, he was still holding first. 9 is when it all came crashing down.

Something had happened to his steering wheel, he ran over the small curb on the side of the track, loosing control of the car and sliding into the wall. I sat there in shock.

"Lando are you okay?" Zak asked over the radio.

"Yeah all good." He said tiredly. "Fucking idiot." He whispered.

"Don't worry about that mate." Zak said.

"Shit." Lando whispered. A medic person was already to his side, helping him out of the car.

He got out with ease, and walked to the side of the track, making his way back to the garage. It had been a minute until we all saw him walking into the garage.

"I got it, just leave me alone." Lando said, yanking his arm away from the medic.

"It's just one race, you have another chance." Zak said.

"Yeah. Right." Lando said, walking to the back of the garage and into the main building of the circuit.

Zak looked at me with a worried look. That was my signal to go check on him. I walk past everyone and went through the paddock to get to his drivers room.

I open the door slightly, seeing Lando laying on the couch. "Hey." I said quietly. No response.

I walk over and sit on the floor next to the couch, gently rubbing his back as he layed there silently, breathing heavily.

"Lan, it's just one race. You can't beat yourself up about it." I said gently.

"I let them down." He whispered.

"No you didn't. They understand. Nobody's perfect."

"I have to be. You don't understand what people will say!" He said, his tone raising.

"What people?"

"The fucking fans!"

"Look... if they were truly by your side, they'd support you and stay with you. You don't need to believe what they say. You don't need to listen to them. They are your fans, not your boss." I said. The room went silent again.

I heard a light sniffle, then another.

"Lando. Look at me." I said, he lifted his head and turned it to me.

"Baby... you don't need to cry. It's going to be okay." I said, lightly wiping his tears away.

"Your going to be okay. I promise." I said. He slowly nodded, sitting up, his breathing getting heavier.

I moved on the couch next to him. "Your going to be okay. It's going to be okay." I said, wrapping my arms around him.

"I- I just..." He said, shrugging. His voice getting stuck in his throat.

"Shh... You don't need to say anything." I said, rubbing his back lightly. he loosely wrapped his arms around me.

"I can't... I can't go back out there." He said quietly, his voice shaking.

"You don't have to. I can tell Zak. We can just stay here."

"Can you stay?"

"Of course. You know I'm always here for you. You don't have to do this alone." I said. I felt him nod against my head.

"I don't know what I'd do without you." He said.

"You don't have to find out. I'm here for as long as you need me." I said quietly.

Hey loves! Hope you like this one! Comment to be added to the tag list!

[vandnana]

In Love With The Enemy [IV]

Chapter 4: Toruk Makto Will Disappear

pairing: lo’ak x female turned na’vi reader

summary: during the time when jake became toruk makto, you were quaritch’s youngest and most valued soldier, the daughter he never had. but, pandora changed you and you died during the final battle, betraying quaritch and wishing that you had been able to do more. now, you have been reborn again, as a na’vi, tasked with quaritch’s new military avatar crew to kill Jake Sully. taking advantage of this second chance at life, you help the Sullys and fall in love along the way.

genre: fluff, angst ~ slow burn, pining on lo’ak’s part.

warnings: mentions of blood, war, violence

highlights: [jake and reader having moments as best friends, mo'at throwing down wisdom, classic sully sibling bickering, more of reader's backstory with quaritch, lo'ak and reader moments!]

word count: 13,394

note: i'm back from the dead like our dear reader with a long awaited update! i am so sorry to my lovers clan for taking so long. for everybody who has waited so patiently, thank you. and for all who are new, welcome!

| prologue | chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4

When Spider awoke, he was immediately blinded by fluorescent lights that hung above him, his head aching as he sat up. The steel of the platform he was lying on made his body feel cold, and as he looked around the room, windowless and white, his heart felt cold too, the lack of life around him so bewildering and unfamiliar. Shifting, he winced, and looking down he found a wound on his right arm—a gash that he had earned while falling onto the forest ground, bandaged with a white wrapping.

Then, he instantly thought of you, overcome with worry as he wondered if you were alright.

Everything had happened so fast.

One moment, you had finally made up with him and you had solidified that bond while flying to the Tree of Souls—that sense of togetherness irreplaceable in his heart.

But before he even had time to truly cherish that moment, the unthinkable happened. Stuck, captured, and alone, Spider's anger and frustration overwhelmed him, his breathing rapid suddenly as he took his emotions out on the walls that kept him. Banging on the double glass, he yelled out with fury, knowing that his captors were watching on the other side.

He struck the glass and the walls until his hands hurt and his knuckles bled, the pain of the impact from the metal clouded by that rage. In truth, he was so exhausted, but he kept on going, the fire inside fueling him as he goaded the soldiers to face him.

Then, suddenly the doors of the room opened, revealing the group of soldiers that had captured him, “Looks like Jungle boy’s awake.” Zdinarsk said with a half-grin.

Spider hissed, bearing his teeth, but that only caused a roll of laughter from each of the soldiers.

“So, you think you’re one of them.” There was a pause as the soldiers stepped aside to reveal who the voice belonged to.

It was Quaritch, his demeanor distant and demanding as he inspected Spider, frowning as he looked at him, intensely displeased, “What’s your name boy?”

Spider didn’t answer, glaring at him bitterly, the defiance making Quaritch’s blood boil. He took one of his guns out, laughing slightly as he unlocked the safety, “I’m only gonna ask you nicely one more time, but after that it’s gonna hurt.”

Spider hesitated before caving in. He gritted his teeth as he responded, meeting Quaritch's eyes with vileness, “Who are you? Tell me that and maybe I’ll answer.”

“Colonel Quaritch.” He let his eyes go to the gun, before eyeing Spider again, “Now again, boy, what’s your name?”

Spider's eyes only widened for a moment before he could feel his rage summit within him, scorn undercutting that growing anger as he scoffed, “Don’t you recognize your own son?”

It wasn't until this moment that Spider realized how much he longed to face his father, to finally look the man who didn't want him in the eye.

The rest of the soldiers teetered, all of them sharing shock as they looked at him. The last time they had seen him, he was only a baby, and here he was in front of all them— grown-up.

Quaritch put the gun down, stepping backward for a moment as he felt a sudden throb afflict his heart, “Miles?” He paused, kneeling down, the twinge in his heart making itself known as he spoke again, this time softer, quieter, “Thought they would have sent you back to earth.”

“So, that's what you named me huh? My name is Spider, and they can’t put babies in cryo, dipshit.” Spider spat, crossing his arms as he kept a snarl on his face.

Quaritch was stunned.

What did he feel for this kid? Guilt? Love? Sadness? Relief? For the briefest moment, he let his resolve down, the realization of who Spider was unexpectedly softening his expression, whispers of those emotions attempting to breach the surface.

To the rest of the regiment it was unperceived, the mask of his steely glare lending his usual gruff. But, Spider saw it clearly. In that blink of time, the awareness of his father's startling vulnerability gripped him, anchoring itself into his mind and forcing its weight onto his heart.

This was the moment that Spider had waited for. He had expected to be angry and stay angry, to affix betrayal, heartache, and pain to the man in front of him who was supposed to be his family. And yet, he felt a tenderness grow within him, an unforeseen ache that he couldn't define or perhaps, didn't want to define.

Like his father, he maintained his reserve of anger as he spit again at them, pushing down whatever was brewing in him and remembering why he was with them and what was at stake for the Sullys.

Turning to Zdinarsk, Quaritch ordered coldly, “Take him to Ardmore and the science pukes. We’ll see what he knows.” Aggressively, Zdinarsk grabbed Spider by the back of the neck, the rest of the soldiers escorting him out into the hallway with Quaritch behind them.

Quaritch was barely dealing with his loss of you, and now, he had his other child with him. He didn’t know what to think, only that his memories allowed him a fraction of affection compared to what he had for you.

Leading him into one of the main console rooms, they were met by General Ardmore, her hands behind her back as she looked at Spider up and down. The soldiers snickered as Spider fought against their strong grips, amused by his pointless attempt at escape.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" She motioned toward the large contraption in the middle of the room, a device unlike anything Spider had ever seen before, "Strap him in."

Zdinarsk pushed Spider onto the vertical piece of white metal of the contraption, securing him with the accompanying restraints. Over his face, Wainfleet fastened a clear plastic mask and tightening it, Spider could feel the pressure focus itself on every part of his skull.

He saw Ardmore ahead of him through what appeared to be a green membrane within the device's overall metal structure, "Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way."

She paused to lean forward, her glare intense, "Where is Jake Sully hiding?"

"I. Don't. Know." The disdain in Spider's voice was evident as he dragged out every syllable.

Sighing, Ardmore stepped backward, pressing a large red button beside her, "I thought you might say that."

A loud whirring sound erupted from the device, triggering it on as the green membrane slowly started to spin. Immediately, the pressure he had felt before became a burning sensation. Like a singe to every synapse, Spider's brain was on fire, the intensity of it building and building.

"Feel that? That's the radiation reading your brain or rather frying it. Good for us, not so good for you. So, I'll ask you again, where is Jake Sully?" Ardmore yelled out.

Spider could barely see her now, the motion of the radiation screen dizzying him, "I told you I don't know! You're gonna have to kill me!"

Quaritch and the other soldiers watched from the clear glass room behind Ardmore, their eyes switching between Spider and the holographic projection of his brain. The scientists helping Ardmore were observing his brain activity, but they detected no viable information, shaking their heads when Ardmore turned around for an update.

"You're gonna have to do better than "I don't know," Keeping her composure, her tone was clear, but she was beginning to get frustrated by Spider's stubbornness, "There's no use in hiding the truth. Just form a thought and we'll see it. Now, where is his base? Is it in the Floating Mountains? Where is he?"

Over and over and over again, it was the same question and the same answer, every second of resistance tormenting him.

Quaritch, on the outside, was apathetic and uncaring, his arms crossed as he stood tall amongst his regiment. But, something inside of him snapped when Spider’s nose began to bleed and his eyes began to roll backwards. Marching out of the room, he pressed the red button, the spinning of the device halting immediately.

He turned over to Ardmore, his own request surprising him, “General, Let me try the old-fashioned approach.”

Zdinarsk and Wainfleet took Spider back to his steel cell, and it was clear that he had been weakened, his usual aggressions no longer a problem for them as they easily grabbed hold of him.

Ardmore raised an eyebrow, clearly displeased as she reluctantly nodded, “He’s not your child.”

She was right. He wasn’t Quaritch’s child. He never was.

You were.

But because of Lyle's lie, Quaritch only knew you to be dead.

He sighed, exhaling as he ached over missing you so badly. Even he couldn't believe his own actions, rationalizing that it was the Na'vi part of him that arose a subconscious motivation for caring about the son he knew he never wanted. Although he hated to be in the form of his enemy, he only realized how relieved, how grateful, he felt to be by your side again. While he reveled in fulfilling his vengeance, it was you who had made this new resurgence of life worth living. And it hurt more to recognize that it took you being gone from him for that feeling to settle.

Quaritch waited a while before he finally entered the cell, the opening of the doors revealing Spider sitting on the platform he had woken up on, his knees up and his arms resting on them.

Filling the room was an awkward tension, the two staring at one another before Quaritch knelt down, “From what I remember, I know I wasn’t the best father to you."

Spider huffed, crossing his arms and turning his back away from him.

Sitting down, he took his son by the arm, pulling him forward and forcing him to face him in the eye, "Look, I only cared for my daughter. I admit that. And now that she's dead I—“

“Your daughter? Dead?” In his disbelief, Spider's mouth gaped, eyebrows raised and his forehead crinkled.

Quaritch was visibly bothered, the slightest wince showing in the crinkling of his eyes as he answered the question, “I came here to kill Jake Sully," He lowered his eyes, his voice like the sound of a hiss as he sneered, "And now that he's killed her, just like he did when I was human, I really can't let him live."

Gulping, Spider nodded, biting his tongue as he withheld the truth, unsure of what would ensue if he let out that you were alive.

Changing his demeanor, Quaritch let go of Spider's arm, resting his palms on the top of his thighs. Quaritch appealed to his son with a brightened tone, “I’m not gonna ask you to give up Sully. I know you’d never do that. You’re loyal.”

He paused again, gritting his teeth, “But so am I. I’m not letting my little girl die in vain. You and me, we’re nothing to each other, really. So, you don’t have to think of me as your father.”

Quaritch paused, looking out at the door, the glint of worry in his eyes betraying his previous words, “But, just ride along, okay? Otherwise, I’ll have to give you back to Ardmore.”

Spider reluctantly nodded, and seeing that confirmation, Quaritch left. Spider watched his father go, and although Quaritch seemed to maintain his stern appearance, Spider could distinguish the agony he felt inside over losing you.

How could he not?

He laid back down on the platform, rubbing his temples. He suddenly felt conflicted. Finally meeting his father, Spider saw Quaritch for who he was. He was a military man all the way, hard and callous. But, underneath that harsh exterior, he saw so clearly how much he loved you. Guilt washed over him without warning. Spider hated that he felt guilty for keeping you being alive a secret, hated that in the presence of the man that rejected him, he could only be silent.

But, he also felt guilty for the small part of him that was actually glad his father didn’t know the truth. Because without you, even for a momentary time, maybe Quaritch would finally see him as his son.

He had finally looked the man in the eye, and he hated himself for suddenly feeling so torn. Yet, it was an inner feeling he just couldn't control. Spider couldn’t help but care about what his father thought of him suddenly, couldn’t help but want some sort of approval from the man who rejected him.

He scolded himself for thinking so selfishly, so stupidly. Turning to his side and closing his eyes, Spider pushed those thoughts away, reminding himself why he ended up where he was in the first place.

He was uncertain about what he would face with the regiment, but he knew one thing.

The Sullys' safety, your safety—he would do what he could to ensure it.

-

“What happened?” Jake angrily yelled as Lo’ak carried you off his ikran.

Neytiri was beside him, attending to Kiri and Tuk, both of them crying hysterically as Kiri repeated with a trembling voice, “Spider, they took him! They took him!”

Jake could only focus on you though, his mind warping reality as fear and panic came over him. You were practically lifeless, your arms dangling over and your head tilted backward. It was exactly how you looked when he was holding your dying body.

He quickly ran to you, taking your body from Lo'ak's arms.

“Y/n! Y/n!” Jake called to you, his voice almost breaking as he felt your pulse, only slight relief coming to him as you showed just the weakest sign of life.

Turning his attention back on Lo’ak, he repeated his original question, nostrils flaring as he slowly spoke, every syllable enthralled with his simmering anger, “What happened?”

"It was my fault, sir. I-" Neteyam began, stepping forward in front of his brother per usual.

But Jake shook his head at his oldest son, "I wasn't asking whose fault it was," His eyes turned to Lo'ak suddenly, Jake's fatherly instinct already getting ahead of him, "I asked what happened."

The fury in his voice deepened the shame in both the brothers, the two looking at one another before Lo'ak finally spoke up, "She wanted to stay here at the camp, but I insisted on flying. Everything happened at the Tree of Souls. She connected to it and then something happened. She stopped responding and then the soldiers came and then...they took Spider,” Lo'ak kept his eyes on his father, the guilt in his eyes evident in their glint, “I’m sorry sir.”

Jake and Neytiri looked at one another worriedly. Then, taking Kiri and Tuk's hands, she walked away with them, ushering calm words of reassurance to abate their cries.

Knowing the truth, Jake could feel his gut turn as his anger mixed with a feeling of unsettlement. Jake glanced at you for a moment before his eyes went back to Lo’ak, “I'm taking y/n to your grandma. Until she wakes up, I don't want you anywhere near her. Now go attend to the ikran.” His eyes went to Neteyam, “Both of you.”

“But Dad, let me–”

“You’ve done enough.”

Lo'ak stepped backward suddenly as the sting of his father's words lashed at him.

Jake expected retaliation, expected the usual defiance from his youngest son, but instead Lo'ak kept his head down, his shame evident. He lingered for only a second more before walking away in the direction of Mo'at's tent.

"Why can't you just listen, little bro?" Neteyam placed what was meant to be a comforting hand on Lo'ak's shoulder, but Lo'ak only swatted it away.

"How can I wait around until she wakes up? With how she is now, that could be hours," He paused, his eyes widening in slight panic, "Or days!"

"Calm down, bro. Grandma will know how to heal her. For now, the best that you can do for her is follow Dad's orders. Come on, we have to see to the ikran."

"Bro, no. It's my fault that this happened to her. I have to make sure she's okay." Lo'ak defied, already walking backwards toward the tent.

Neteyam couldn't believe what he was hearing. Turning to face his ikran, he teased Lo'ak loudly, "Wow! My baby brother is actually taking responsibility for his actions! That crush of his has made him less of a skxawng than usual."

Lo'ak heard him from a distance, halting then turning on his heels, "You're just asking to get beat up. You know that?"

"It would be entertaining to see you try. As if you would even stand a chance against the mighty warrior that I am," Neteyam crossed his arms, proud of his retort as his lips curled upwards into a broad, smug smile.

"You know what, I'm actually going to wait until after y/n wakes up, so she can watch me pummel you," Lo'ak punched his fist into his other palm with a satisfied smirk, "It'll make my victory over you even sweeter."

Nodding, Neteyam took the opportunity to get under Lo'ak's skin, faking a serious tone as he stepped away from the ikrans, "That's a good idea actually. I should definitely come with you to check on y/n."

"Woah, woah, woah," Lo'ak blocked Neteyam's path, standing earnestly in front of him with his hand out, "We don't need a third wheel right now, thank you very much."

Lowering his little brother's hand, he cocked his head to the side, amused as he let out a chuckle, "I cannot believe how jealous you get Lo'ak, really it's a marvel to see."

Lo'ak cleared his throat, "Jealous? Of you? The "mighty" warrior? You wish," Setting his gaze on the ikrans behind them, he rationalized his behavior, "And besides, bro you've got your work cut out for you. I admit being responsible is a page I took out of your book today, but you can have the page back, alright? If you come too, who's gonna do what Dad told us to do?"

"Of course, of course, what he told us to do, I will go and do it." Neteyam rolled his eyes, "But what are you going to do when Dad sees you?"

"Have you met me bro?" Lo'ak let a breath out, confidently patting his chest with his right hand, "He won't see me."

Leaving Neteyam without another word, Lo'ak turned and began to stealthily maneuver his way through the camp. While the forefront of his thoughts focused on wondering if you were alright, the back of his mind was playing his brother's words on a loop.

Neteyam was right.

It wasn't like him to act this way. Wherever Lo'ak was so was trouble, and he had grown used to trying to save his own ass with any excuse he could think of.

But this time was different. It wasn't about him. It was about you.

Back at the Tree of Souls, he couldn't let his emotions get the best of him, too focused on getting you to safety. The first shade of horrified panic when you didn't wake up, the fear that ran through him when he was dodging bullets and holding your body, the urgency he was chasing to get you back to base— now, everything he suppressed, he felt all at once. And veiling it all was that persistent effect you've had on him since the day you met. He knew he liked you. He just never realized how much.

-

Jake was holding back his tears as he carried you, whispering, "Everything's going to be fine, y/n."

It was like you were dying in his arms all over again. Your pulse was weak, your skin pale as he laid you down gently in front of Mo'at. She had already sensed the disturbance near the Tree of Souls, her herbs already prepared beside her as she took your face into her hands.

"Will she live, Mo'at?" Jake asked, and as he said those words, it took him back to the day when he first asked you to save her.

"She is merely unconscious. You forget, Toruk Makto, what I told you all those years ago about y/n. The Great Mother still holds her in Her heart. She is not gone from us forever. Her soul has truly been reborn and she has finally connected with the Great Mother."

Jake furrowed his eyebrows, blinking at her as his eyes urged for her to continue.

She placed the herb paste from the palm of your hands to the nape of your neck, then positioned two fingers at your temples, "When y/n was pulled away from the Great Mother, her spirit was still attached, while her body was separated too quickly. She is just now finding her way back."

Jake managed to give her a small smile, her words providing him comfort amidst the turmoil already brewing in his mind.

"I will take care of her here." Mo'at added to her daughter's reassurance, "Now go. I am certain that you have much to discuss with my daughter." She lowered her eyes at Jake, her intuition directing her.

Jake hesitated leaving you, but ultimately heeded Mo'at's request. Lo'ak, from a distance, watched as his father walked away. He hurried over to you, and as if Jake knew he was there, he turned around abruptly, prompting Lo'ak to dive to the ground as he ducked behind a crate of boxes. Squinting and seeing nothing, Jake turned his head forward, making his way to Neytiri.

Letting out a sigh of relief, Lo'ak got up, walking over calmly. When he got there, Mo'at was rubbing your temples, her words to the Great Mother echoing through the tent as she guided your spirit back to your body. He stepped in as quietly as possible, but even with her eyes closed, Mo'at was aware of his presence, lifting her right hand to motion him closer as she continued to speak her prayers to the Great Mother. Lo'ak knelt down beside you, crossing his legs underneath him, his gaze strictly fixated on you.

You could hear Mo'at's voice like a murmur at first, then it felt like a shout from the distance. Feeling as if you were floating in a body of water, you were carried by your own consciousness, your senses all coming back to you slowly.

The void you were in was no longer dark nothingness as her voice called to you, signs of life materializing as flecks of light became visible to you and sensations became known to you again. Light continued to shimmer in front of you and around that light were the spirits of the Great Mother, wispy as they cascaded up and down. Within yourself, you felt tingly and looking down, you watched as your body went from a transparent white to your familiar blue skin.

Outstretching your hands, the Great Mother’s spirits made their way to you, the light behind them becoming bigger and bigger. They surrounded you from head to toe, and beyond was Mo’at’s voice. As you focused on it, it amplified, becoming louder and louder until it felt like she was right beside you, her words clapping at you like thunder as your eyes shot open and your body instantly arose.

Lo'ak leaned forward, his happy relief evident as he called out to you smiling, "Y/n! You're okay, you're ok—." You punched him square in the jaw sending him backwards, your body instinctively in defensive mode, as you awoke, your breathing sporadic as your eyes adjusted to your surroundings.

"Damn!" Lo'ak howled, his hand rubbing at his jaw.

When you realized it was him that you punched, you lifted yourself from your seated position, apologetic as you sat on your knees and taking his face into your hands, you uttered aloud, "I've gotta stop doing this to you."

Lo'ak huffed, letting out a chuckle as he looked up at you, enamor expressed in the way his eyes softened, "I welcome any touch of yours, y/n, even if it does give me a bruise."

"You're ridiculous," You let go of his face, smacking him on the arm before leaning back, your palms resting on the ground.

He rubbed his arm, leaning forward, "Or two."

Behind you, Lo'ak peered over at his grandma, who gave him an encouraging nod, her lips pursed together in a proud grin, "It is comforting to know that even in dire straits, your affections do not wain."

Turning your head, you blinked at her, cheeks flushing. She merely met you with an innocent smile, outstretching her hands to the two of you"Now, come make yourself useful, my grandson. I must change y/n's dressing for her shoulder."

Spinning your body, you sat with your legs crossed in front of her, and from behind Lo'ak knelt down, gently taking off the wrapping.

Wringing out water from the basin beside her, she handed it to Lo'ak, "Wipe the dried blood," Then, getting up from her seated position, she went to her table, gathering another array of herbs to put onto your wound.

"Sorry if this stings," Lo'ak warned before he began to dab the blood.

He was working so delicately, so careful not to hurt you that you put a hand over his, reassuring him, "I'm not a baby, Lo'ak. You don't have to be so gentle."

Guiding his hands, you helped him as you dug into your skin a little harsher, more blood coming off and transferring to the cloth. At your touch, Lo'ak maintained a cool composure on the outside, but he was fighting his nerves on the inside, the flush on your cheeks suddenly matching the flush that began to take its place on his.

"You know, I really am glad you're okay." His eyes went downcast, knowing that what he was about to say next would shatter the bubble of comfort you were easing into, "But, something happened at the Tree of Souls and you're not gonna like it."

Halting your movement, you put your hand down and Lo'ak retreated his own hand, placing the cloth back in the basin, "What happened Lo'ak?"

With a heavy heart, he explained, "Your regiment, they came, guns blazing. I had to get you out of there. I thought you were dying. He let a breath out, "We were flying through the forest as they were chasing us and Spider...he fell off Kiri's ikran and they took him."

Your heart dropped, mouth agape and your eyes instantly sullen, "What?"

"I'm sorry, y/n." It was all Lo'ak could say as you put your head in your hands, your mind spiraling.

This changed everything.

Your breathing became rapid as you wondered what they could be doing to him. It was obvious why they took him. They needed intel and he was the perfect captive. He was close to Jake. He knew his whole operation. He could lead them right to the base. Then you thought of your father, dread filling you as you could only imagine what he would do when he found out that Spider was his son.

Your first instinct was to get up, to fly out of the base, and save your brother, "I need to—"

Mo'at looked over, the disturbance she sensed in your heart, begging her to interject. But, Lo'ak had already gotten up with you, ready to chase after you and catching your hand before you stopped yourself, staring ahead, your eyebrows furrowed.

You felt a jab in your heart as the truth pricked at you. It was futile. You knew all too well that Jake would follow you there, and naturally so would Neytiri and the kids. Saving your brother meant a death sentence for the Sullys, and as painful as that choice was, it just wasn't a risk you were willing to take.

You sat back down and Lo'ak followed your movements, keeping his hand in yours, hoping that you felt comforted by his gesture. When he squeezed your hand, you finally looked down, pulled from your blank stare. You met his eyes, clear concern etched in the way his forehead wrinkled and his lips turned downward into a frown.

Shaking your head, you feigned not being worried, managing a smile, "Don't look at me like that. I'm okay, I promise." You sighed, "Spider's a strong kid. I know he'll be okay."

He tilted his head at you, not believing a word you were saying as he tapped your forehead lightly with two fingers, "Come on y/n, what's going on in that pretty head of yours, hmm?"

As if to comfort you, Grace's voice within your mind drowned out your worries, her consolation from your visit at the Tree of Souls echoing in your mind,

"I know you’ll defeat your father, but while you’re here, the Great Mother wants you to live freely. It’s the only way you’ll be able to fulfill your purpose."

Mo'at, with the array of herbs in a bowl handed them to Lo'ak. Unwillingly, he let go of your hand, taking it and following her instructions as she said, "Rub this into her wound in circular motions."

Kneeling down, she sat on her knees, preparing a fresh new bandage for you. You turned to your side to look at her and she met your eyes. She remained silent, but as she gazed upon you, it spoke volumes, her chasmic sense of wisdom radiating as she interpreted the spiritual halo that made itself known to her.

In the distance, you could hear your name being echoed from outside, your ears twitching at the sound, and following it came a set of footsteps nearing and nearing.

It was Tuk, running as fast as she could once she had spotted your upright figure from where she was walking with Kiri.

"Kiri! She's okay, she's okay! Look!" Her excitement bubbled through the innocence in her voice as she dragged her sister forward.

Pivoting, Lo'ak lifted his hands from your shoulder as you were met by Tuk's embrace, "Aw Tuk."

"Easy there Tuk," Kiri warned, putting a hand on your back, "Y/n's just woken up."

Kiri peered over at Lo'ak, his hand still in the bowl and scoffing, she inspected his work, squinting, "Did you—" She stopped herself, snatching the bowl from his hands.

"Hey! I was kind of in the middle of something here," Lo'ak protested, but she didn't seem to care as she retorted sarcastically "Right, and you were doing such a great job, skxawng—Move," She pushed her brother out of the way, "You should have used yanna bark sap at this stage of healing."

Mo'at raised an eyebrow at her granddaughter, impressed but slightly offended, "Oh really? And who is Tsahik?"

"You are, grandmother. But, yanna bark is better. It stings less."

Tuk sat in your lap as Kiri took over, and peering over at Lo'ak, his arms crossed, a scowl on his face, you spoke, unable to contain your laughter as memories with Grace and Jake resurfaced, "You know, the two of you remind me of your parents sometimes."

Kiri's eyes brightened hearing her mother's name, "Really? I thought that they were always friends."

Lo'ak, curious as well, perked up too, eager to learn about his father's life before the life he had now. And even Tuk listened, her eyes on you.

You nodded, "Not at first. Your dad and I had no problem being friends. We were inseparable since the day we met. But, your mom needed a little more convincing." You paused, the memory so vivid in your mind that you saw it right in front of you, "I remember how they finally became friends."

You recounted the story as if it had happened yesterday.

You were at Site 26, eating at the table of the small kitchen, Grace beside you, her usual cigarette in her mouth.

He had wheeled himself in there, a plate already ready for him as Grace urged him to sit down, "Bon appetit, Marine."

"If you're feeling extra hungry, I'm more than willing to share," You joked, picking up your fork and pretending to feed him, "Say ahh!"

He swatted your hand away with a scowl, recoiling at the smell, "You know, today I made a kill and we ate it. At least, I know where that meal came from."

He attempted to wheel himself away, but Grace protested, "Oh no you don't. As your boss, I'm telling you to take some down time. That was your other body. You need to take care of this body."

Groaning, he nodded and you took it upon yourself to put it in the microwave for him, "Don't worry about getting up, old man. I got this for you."

He sneered at you, scoffing, "You're lucky that you're younger than me, kids meal. It's not in me to fight a baby like you."

You slammed the microwave door shut, "Ha. ha. Are you sure you can even fight at all? Your aim is shot. I went to the bathroom after you and there was piss all over the seat. I think you should get your cataracts checked."

Grace let out a boisterous laugh, taking a drag out of her cigarette, "I'll kick both of your asses if you don't reel it in. Y/n, baby girl, give the man his food please. He looks like crap."

Taking it out of the microwave, you set it in front of him, taking a seat beside him as you pointed, "It's already in pieces so you won't have a hard time taking your dentures out later."

"Thanks y/n. You're so thoughtful." Jake replied sarcastically, spooning some of it in his mouth.

As he chewed, the taste unbearable, he looked around for a distraction, his eyes fixating on the pictures in front of him. Filing through them, he held one up recognizing the setting, his tone serious as he turned to Grace.

One of his first excursions with his avatar was to visit Grace's old school. Ten years of her life she put into teaching the Na'vi about Earth, just for it to become a cursed piece of history. He couldn't forget the bullet holes that adorned the walls, his curiosity getting the best of him as he held the picture up to Grace, "What did happen at the school, Grace?"

Your expression darkened, sadness overwhelming your heart as Grace took her cigarette out of her mouth, her voice cracking as she explained, "Sylwanin, Neytiri's older sister stopped coming to the school. She was angry about the bulldozers. When her and a couple warriors set one on fire, they came to the school, the RDA right on their trail. She thought that I could protect them, then they killed her right in front of Neytiri. Then, after, they never came back. I got most of the kids out, but that kind of pain," She sniffled, fighting back tears, "It reaches back through the link."

Jake could only listen, understanding dawning on him. She sighed, reclaiming a stern, distant stance as she shook her head, getting up. "Not that you would understand that feeling, right Marine? You're used to doing the killing."

Jake put his head down, shame befalling him and wanting to relieve the tension you called out to her, "Wait, Grace!"

"Don't." Jake said to you, his hand still holding the picture, scorn touching his heart, "You know better than anyone that she isn't wrong. We follow orders. It's what we do."

You tilted your head at him, taking the picture out of his hand, "Then prove her wrong, Jake. Convince Eytukan to let her back into the village. Those kids meant everything to her. And I'm sure they miss her too."

Jake mulled over your words, pursing his lips, "You know, that's not a bad idea actually," He roughed up your hair, "Thanks kid. I'll make it happen. I promise."

Within a week, Grace was back in the village, to her delighted surprise.

You waited for her to come back, leaning against the window near her pod. When she finally got out, she was smiling from ear to ear.

Lowering her eyes, she questioned you, "What?"

You nudged her with your elbow. "Not bad for a Marine, huh?"

She shook her head, in disbelief, "I should have known you put him up to this. This had you," She put a hand up in front of you, tracing your outline as she continued, "Written all over it."

"But he did it, didn't he?" You argued, and she fell silent, rolling her eyes at you.

"Look, Jake's always going to be that Marine at heart, but give him a chance. You gave me one." You coaxed her, taking her hand into yours.

"Alright, alright Miss Marine," She sighed again, but you could tell she was happy, "Jake Sully and I as friends, who would have thought."

Hearing her oldest daughter's name, Mo'at could feel a twinge in her heart, but she was gratified to know that you remembered her. Kiri looked upon you with gratefulness as well, the story connecting her more with a past that she had always craved to know. Lo'ak, on the other hand, felt shocked, the Jake you knew so contrasting to the strict father he had grown up with.

"I spoke to her, your mother," You looked at Kiri, "At the Tree of Souls."

Kiri widened her eyes, urging for you to continue as she listened intently. Mo'at shared the same eagerness, and having already taken the time to interpret the will of the Great Mother when the thought first arose, she knew that Grace's message would reveal the final piece she needed to help you.

"She knows that I'll defeat my father. But, she didn't tell me how, only that the Great Mother wanted me to live freely. Only then, will I be able to fulfill my purpose." Each word was a puzzle perplexing you and you looked at Mo'at, desperate to know what she thought.

Mo'at took a moment to think, her eyes closed as her voice weaved through the subtle breeze that entered through the tent. When she had found the words to say, she spoke them with conviction.

"Life is about balance, y/n. To be too much of one thing and not enough of another can lead us on a lost path. Do not mistake surviving for living."

You took her words in, absorbing what she was saying. You knew what she was trying to tell you and you chuckled appreciatively, but still you continued to question her, curious and concerned, "What does that have to do with my purpose?"

"The Great Mother has spoken her wishes for you. Do not burden yourself with finding your purpose, for it is not meant to burden you at all. There are many things in this new life, many people," She glanced over at Lo'ak for a moment before her eyes set upon you again, "that can still bring you joy even when there is uncertainty."

Lo'ak looked at you instantly, heart on his sleeve as a grin took over his face, hoping that you would meet his eyes, but you only maintained eye contact before averting your eyes, shyness washing over you as you nodded timidly.

Kiri went back and forth between her brother and you, wholly entertained. Putting a hand on yours, "I'm happy that you were able to connect with my mother again. It is good news for this day."

There was a pain behind her eyes and discerning it, you squeezed her hand, "I'm sorry about Spider."

It meant a lot for you to acknowledge that ache she was so desperately trying to hide as she replied, "Thank you. Now, let's finish wrapping your shoulder."

Mo'at handed her granddaughter the bandage and taking it, Kiri skillfully bound your wound, tying it tightly then patting your shoulder, "There. All done."

"Thank you. To all of you." You acknowledged, and letting Tuk off your lap, you stood up, "Now, I have to go talk your dad."

"I'm coming with you," Lo'ak said immediately, getting up and kissing his grandma on the cheek before following you out.

The two girls were close behind, bidding their grandma farewell with a wave as they trailed behind Lo'ak.

From a distance, you already saw Jake and Neytiri in their tent, and although you were far, you could tell they were arguing.

Turning around, you put a hand on Lo'ak's chest, "Maybe you guys should stay behind."

He looked at Kiri and Tuk behind him and reluctantly, he replied, "Okay."

You squinted your eyes at him, expecting his protests, but he remained calm. "Okay...good."

Turning on your heels, you kept going and it wasn't long before you heard their footsteps behind you again. Whipping your head around, you caught Lo'ak mid-walk and not expecting it, he almost ran into you, his hands going to your waist as he avoided crashing forward.

Dangerously close, he kept his eyes locked on you, your expression clearly frustrated, "I'm being serious, Lo'ak. I'm not going to tell you again."

You ignored how his hands felt on your waist, the feeling stirring butterflies in your stomach. Gently taking his wrists, you peeled his hands off.

In surrender, he put his hands up, backing away, "Fine, fine. We're planted, okay? On my honor."

You smiled at him, "Thank you."

When you got to the entrance, you leaned onto the side of it.

So engrossed in their argument, they didn't notice you, Jake's hands in fists as he let out, "We have to leave the Forest."

Neytiri shook her head, her voice forceful and strained, "You cannot ask this. We cannot leave our People. This is our home!"

You cleared your throat, announcing your presence, Neytiri halitng her words immediately as her eyes went to you.

Jake did the same, his expression once distressed and defeated, now illuminated with relief.

"Y/n!" He ran, hugging you, his voice cracking, "Don't ever scare me like that again."

You patted him on the back, whispering, "You old sap. Sorry for scaring you."

Your head rested on Jake's shoulder and you made eye contat with Neytiri. She couldn't hide her emotions, her hands on her head as she looked at you, her eyes pleading as she began to say, "Tell him, y/n that he cannot do this, that there is a way to defeat your demon father from here."

You fell silent, letting go of Jake, unsure of what to say. You and Jake exchanged looks, the two of you in sync.

A father protects. It's what gives him meaning.

You taught him that.

He was Toruk Makto, the leader of the Omaticaya, their protector, their peacekeeper. But, he was also Jake Sully, a father and a husband. Quaritch made him and his family walking targets among The People who never asked to be part of a feud whose end was supposed to be in the Hallelujah Mountains. Jake knew very well how unbearable it is to live with innocent blood on your hands, and he just couldn't bear for the Omaticaya to become collateral damage.

You both knew what had to be done, and there was only one way he could protect everyone, to do his duty, to make sure that no one he loved would get hurt because of him.

Neytiri, in her desperation, picked up her father's bow from where it was being displayed in the tent, "My father gave me this bow as he lay dying," Her voice cracked as she continued, "And he said protect The People. You're Toruk Makto!"

You hated to be on Jake's side this time, but he was right, "Neytiri, he had your children under his knife and now that he has Spider..."

You stopped yourself for a moment, not wanting to admit your fears as you looked away from them both, "He's going to come with everything he's got and he's not gonna stop."

You turned toward Jake and Neytiri again, taking her hand in yours, your heart heavy, "I know you don't want to leave, but you have to understand. If the People harbor us, they will die."

"This will protect The People." Jake put a hand on your shoulder and a hand on Neytiri's face, cupping it gently," Look, I got nothing. I got no plan. But I can protect this family. That I can do."

Sniffling and a wail of cries erupted from outside of the tent and through an opening, you saw the movement of a blue tail. The sound caused Neytiri's ears to twitch, instantly recognizing her child's cries as she uttered, "Tuk?"

Revealing themselves, the kids slowly, one by one, made their way in, and to your surprise, Neteyam had joined them, being the last to walk through the entrance.

"Do we really have to leave here?" Tuk asked, her face stained with tears as she held onto her sister.

Jake and Neytiri didn't know what to say, caught off guard by their children's sudden appearance. Jake was about to walk over to her, but you beat him to it, kneeling down beside her, "You remember what I told you when that man took you in the Mountains? About your dad?"

She nodded, "That he was one of the Sky People, that only he knows how to stop them."

You smiled at her, "Smart girl," You tried your best to hide the heaviness behind your eyes as you reassured her, "Your dad is just doing what he knows best," You looked up at the other Sully kids, hoping that you were giving them at least a semblance of comfort with your words, "Protecting what he loves."

She seemed to understand, pressing her lips together as she nodded. Letting go of her sister's hands, she ran to Jake and he carried her, rubbing her back. Neytiri motioned for the rest of the kids to come and they did, all of them falling in as they hugged one another.

You kept yourself at a distance, looking at them as they embraced one another, your heart breaking. And again, you were reminded what you were brought back to Pandora for—the dread, the pain, the anguish that your regiment was tasked to do. Your mere existence was already causing ruins to Jake and the people he loved the most.

You walked out of the tent, hoping they wouldn't notice you had gone. But, Jake had seen you go, and in his worry, he put Tuk down, following you.

It didn't matter how many times Jake called your name, you didn't respond, buried in your thoughts as you quickly walked through the base.

Despite how much you wanted to live freely like Grace had told you, no matter how much you felt the pull of life, the weight of death was strong, and until you could lift it, you just couldn't welcome a renewed sense of being.

Because here you were, your identity and your destiny still attached to a mission that served the vengeance of what was meant to be dead. You didn't feel like you could move on from that, not until everything was over, not until you did everything you could to protect Jake and his family.

That was the promise you made to yourself when you first awoke and you would keep it. No matter what it took.

The People, you saw, were living, thriving in their homes. Jake had ensured their livelihoods, ensured their safety, and maintained their peace. It was meant to be a comforting sight, but you were only met with sadness in your heart. The words you once told Jake all those years ago, you never realized how much he lived by it until now.

Somehow, you had made it far enough to where the scientists were staying and seeing you, Norm and Max ran over, appearing in front of you.

You finally stopped, pulled from your thoughts as you greeted them, "Oh, hey guys."

"What's wrong?" Norm asked, although he could already guess why you looked so down.

Jake had already broken the news to them earlier, offering a sympathetic hand when you replied, "Haven't you heard? We're getting out of Dodge. Per usual, my dad's done what he does best."

You sat down near the steps of their lab, resting your palms on the sides of your face as your elbows were propped onto your knees, You let out a soft chuckle, attempting to lighten the mood with a joke, "I've got a lot of overdue samples to look at."

That earned a laugh from the two of them, Max replying, "If you weren't like 9 feet tall, I'd definitely let you take a look."

Norm pulled out his tablet, scrolling through countless video logs until he found the one he was looking for, "Hey, I was looking through these the other day and look what I stumbled upon."

He handed you the tablet, and pressing the play button, you watched.

"Y/n. Geez, I've been chasing you down this whole..." You looked up to find Jake walking over with a troubled expression, his words stopping as his eyes made their way down to the tablet, the sight of himself, you, and Grace silencing him.

"Jake Sully here. This is video log..."

You were behind him, hunched over beside Grace with a syringe in your hand, "Twenty-seven. Video log twenty-seven."

"Hey, is this my video log or yours?" He retorted.

"You're the one who couldn't remember the number." You muttered, smiling to yourself.

"Anyway, video log twenty-seven. Learning to ride an ikran. We call them banshees. It's the test every young hunter has to pass. But to do that you gotta go where the banshees are."

"Oo-rah." You chimed in.

Jake turned around again, clearing his throat, and you groaned, "Sorry."

"Man, taming that thing was a bitch. But, when I finally made the bond and I was in the air...Anyway, I may not be much of a horse guy, but riding an ikran? I was born to do that."

"You lucky bastard." You muttered again, taking your eyes out of the microscope when Grace pinched you.

"Stop interrupting. You're distracting him. You know his brain can't handle too much."

Jake scowled, "You can kiss my lily white as—"

"Hey, I'm just saying, if I had my own avatar...I'd never be on the ground."

Watching that only deepened your sadness, and you handed Norm his tablet back, your wish of having your own ikran a pipe dream now that you were leaving the Forest.

Norm, still unaware of the news, looked over at Jake, nudging him, "Might have taken twenty years but, it's still not too late for y/n to have one!"

Jake deliberated it, recognizing your dejection in the way you avoided his eyes. And although in the wake of his decision, it seemed like an impulsive idea, he conceded, "You're right."

In your shock, you finally looked at Jake, taking your hand away from your jaw as your mouth hung open, "Seriously? I thought for sure you would hate the idea of me even stepping outside of camp."

"Well, you're one of the People, aren't you? And besides, "He got up, motioning for you to do the same. Attempting to lighten the mood, he shrugged, "I really didn't want to have to push you in a stroller when we leave here."

You put a hand on the top of your head, allowing your laughter to permeate through the melancholy that felt like it was taking over your body, "You're gonna end up back in that wheelchair real soon. Just you wait."

Jake retaliated affectionately, "It must be tiring being such a pain in the ass."

You waved goodbye to Norm and Max, Jake waiting for you as you caught up to him, "You must be exhausted then."

Jake pulled you in by the shoulder, guiding you forward, "Come on, kids meal, we have one more stop before I take you to Oo-rah."

You returned to the tent, your arrival prompting the Sullys to look up from their separate activities. They were all seated on the floor beside each other. Neteyam acknowledged you with a nod as he was putting a new string on his bow. Kiri was weaving something together, focusing as she looped tiny beads onto a string. Neytiri was with Tuk, the youngest Sully comfortably seated in her lap as she prepared a midday snack. And Lo’ak was only distracting himself as he sharpened his knife over and over, awaiting your return eagerly.

Neytiri arose from her seated position, looking at her husband expectantly, "Ma Jake, what is going on?"

Jake pinched your ear, earning a scowl from you, "We've got somewhere to go."

They all got up hearing Jake, the siblings tilting their heads as they exchanged looks between one another.

The six of you walked toward the edge of the camp. Lo'ak taking his place beside you. "You really want your own ikran? I thought for sure you preferred riding with me." He flirtatiously joked.

"I never said I didn't." You replied rather quickly, catching onto his flirtations, your swift response causing an instant blush to appear on his cheeks.

"I just was really looking forward to racing you on one. Plus," You paused, "I'd definitely win." You feigned a cough to slightly mask your words, a smile erupting on your face as you watched his reaction turn sour.

"You really think you'd win against me? No chance." Lo'ak scoffed cockily, crossing his arms as he raised an eyebrow at you.

"Even Tuk could beat you, bro." Neteyam interjected, overhearing the conversation, letting out a laugh as his sister stuck her tongue out at Lo'ak.

"You're mistaking me for you, bro. You must have forgotten the last time we raced, I left you in the dust." Lo'ak replied, cavalier and confident.

"You cheated that time, and you know it." Neteyam pointed at him sternly.

Lo'ak leaned into you, whispering in your ear, "Think of the slowest animal to ever exist.. that's how slow Neteyam is compared to me."

His taunts amused you, and although Neteyam didn't think his remarks were funny, you couldn't help but laugh, remembering your old pilot days with Trudy.

Lo'ak's lips curled into a smile, pride bubbling in his stomach for making you laugh. You all stopped when you reached the edge of the camp, craning your neck, your eyes gaped at the myriad of clouds covering the blue sky, slowly setting into sunset. Scattered through the air were the floating rocks of the mountains, vast and many in the distance.

With each call, the Sullys' ikrans came, landing on the rocks and taking hold with their talons, screeching loudly as a greeting.

Lo'ak patted his ikran's head affectionately, connecting his queue to his. Cautiously, you put a hand out, but your guardedness was unnecessary as his ikran felt Lo'ak's fondness of you, moving his head forward to meet your hand.

You were surprised by the gesture, smiling.

"He likes you," Lo'ak remarked.

"He's not the only one," Neteyam fake coughed, aiming to embarrass his brother, a satisfied smirk plastered on his face as he mounted his ikran.

Lo'ak clapped in fake enthusiasm then flipped his brother off with both hands.

Jake, who heard the commotion looked over, ready to scold his youngest son. Seeing the look in Jake's eyes, you put Lo'ak's fingers down, pushing him forward toward his ikran, "Just get on, won't you?"

He obeyed your orders, taking a seat on the saddle then offering a hand to you, "You better hold on tight. You know I like to ride fast." He glared at Neteyam, "Unlike some people we know."

"Stop trying to impress y/n with your lies." Neteyam replied, putting his visor on.

You moved Lo'ak's hand over, lifting yourself up onto his ikran. You were almost fully seated when Jake pulled your arm back down, the abruptness almost making you lose balance as your feet landed on the ground.

"What the hell—" You yelped, blinking up at Jake.

"You ride with me." He still held onto your arm, practically dragging you until you flicked his forehead hard in response.

"Ow!" He let go of you, placing his fingers where you had hit him, "Last time you flew with my son, you came back unconscious. I just don't want to take any chances." Jake explained sternly.

You squinted at him, "No, that vein sticking out of your forehead is telling me there's more to it."

Jake looked up, his fists balled as he sucked in a breath through his teeth, "Y/n—"

You put a hand up though shushing him, your expression determined as you defended Lo'ak, "Last time I flew with your son, he got me back here. Safely. So, cut Lo'ak some slack and have a little more faith."

Jake let a breath out, looking up, clearly contemplating and frustrated by your protests. Neytiri though, was having none of it, clearing her throat and prompting his attention, "Ma Jake." Neytiri lowered her eyes at her husband, "She will ride with Lo'ak. Now, let's go before the sun fully sets."

Groaning, Jake nodded, returning back to his ikran but not before he gave Lo'ak one final warning look, which Lo'ak reluctantly acknowledged with a nod.

Again, you lifted yourself onto his ikran, stabilizing yourself as you sat comfortably in front of him. He was unusually quiet with no flirtatious rally to tell you, causing you to look at him from behind.

He felt shy under your gaze but, he masked it immediately, smirking at you like he usually did, "Ready?"

"More than ever." You said, taking hold of the handles on the saddle.

Following Jake out, one by one, the sound of wings' flapping filled your ears and then you were into the sky, the wind dancing through your hair. You ascended upward, the flight to Oo-rah not too long as Lo'ak sped through the air.

For some reason, you were bothered that Lo'ak had no comment to make after you defended him, the silence between the two of you for the first ride deafening.

You looked back at him, catching his eye briefly before turning around, yelling over the wind, "I didn't have to defend you like that, you know."

Lo'ak didn't speak for a moment, leaning forward as he tried to decipher your expression. You looked at him from the side, your irritation making itself known in the glare you gave him.

When he realized how bothered you were, he felt exhilarated at having stirred some kind of reaction from you, a stark difference from your usual tendency to brush him off.

He finally replied to you, making sure his face was dangerously close to yours, "So, why'd you do it?"

He could have guessed your reasons very easily, feeling he had come to know you well enough. It was intensely you to put Jake in his place the way you did—he had seen you do it before. Not to mention, he thought the world of you, your moral compass irrefutable and your heart kind.

But, he just couldn't help but ask anyway, fishing for a specific answer as he hoped he could get you to admit your feelings.

You didn't say anything, trying to find the words to explain your reasons. It didn't help that you could feel Lo'ak's chest behind your back and his breath on your neck, the proximity making you nervous, like you were being studied under a microscope.

You cleared your throat, avoiding his eyes as you looked onward, "Because we're friends."

Lo'ak leaned backwards then accelerated without warning, dipping underneath one of the floating rocks, the movement forcing your grip on the left handle loose. Immediately, Lo'ak let go of one of the handles, cradling you diligently, his hold on you firm as gravity took over, your head now abruptly resting in the crevice between his neck and shoulder. Instinctively, you placed your hands on his arms, clasping onto him to regain your stability.

He beamed at you coyly, smug as he smoothly said, "Just friends?"

You knew you were bright red, the cold of the wind barely able to cool the heat on your face as you lightly touched your cheeks. You were completely flustered, but that didn't change that you were still irritated with him, "If this is your way of saying thank you, you're doing a shit job."

Oo-rah was just up ahead, Jake already landing on the cave's edge near the clearing of the ikran's lair, everyone else following behind him in a line formation.

"And how would you like me to show my gratitude? I can think of a lot of ways." Lo'ak emphasized, moving his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

You both hopped off his ikran and you turned to Lo'ak who was eager to hear your response.

You shoved his face away from yours, responding sarcastically, "Oh fuck off."

"No, you'd miss me." He placed his hand where yours had been, unable to contain the huge grin he had.

You walked over to Jake, and he threw something at you, "Tie the mouth with this first. You’ll know which one is yours because—“

“I know, I know. It’ll try to kill me.” You interrupted, looking down at what you caught.

It was a piece of twine with a ball of rope at the end of it. You practiced spinning it around before walking the cliff's edge, the hoard of ikrans seemingly greeting you with their cries and screeches.

As you continued to step forward, most of the ikrans avoided your eyes, not caring too much about your presence. Then, above, the loud flapping of wings caught your attention, your eyes following the descent of a teal and pink colored ikran. She hissed at you loudly, meeting your eyes with viciousness, and you met hers back with an equal viciousness of your own. You waited for the opportune moment to strike and when you felt that in your gut, you acted with utmost swiftness. 

You could hear the Sullys cheering for you from behind as you tied her mouth, stunning her momentarily. You quickly hopped on her back, wrapping your arm around her neck, gripping for your life as she thrashed against it. Inching closer and closer to the cliff, your heart was pumping with so much adrenaline as you attempted to grab her queue, and in the midst of that, she threw both of you off the cliff.

You could barely hear everyone yell your name in fear and worry as you fell, spinning as gravity pulled you downward ruthlessly. The air become another adversary, threatening to plummet you to your doom, but you only tightened your grip on her queue while reaching behind for your own, your eyes focusing despite how quickly you were falling. 

When you had reached that precipice, Lo’ak wasted no time following after you, jumping off the cliff as he called his ikran. He readied himself to catch you, but there was no need as he watched you finally make the bond. You straightened yourself on your ikran’s back, catching your breath as you felt her own, completely in tune as you commanded her to fly straight.

The Sullys were not far behind you, taking to the air with impossible quickness the moment you fell off the cliff.

You spun around to meet them, their whoops and cheers uplifting you. You bowed your head, taking the praise, and Jake neared you, worry still etched on his face, but his pride taking over as he grinned at you from ear to ear, "I told you not to scare me like that."

"I definitely beat your record." You flipped your hair with pride, laughing as he scowled.

"Like hell you did." Jake flew slightly forward, purposefully making you dodge his ikran's wings, the movement sending you backward slightly.

You gasped in offense, moving forward to do the same thing to him, but more aggressively as he dove downward to avoid you.

You tilted your head backward, laughing loudly at his stunned reaction. Neytiri joined in on the laughter as well, putting a hand to her mouth, so happy to see the two of you flying together at last. It was a sight she never thought that she would see, and she bubbled with joy seeing her husband so happy to be with you—his best friend.

"Alright, old man," You began, and looking to the sides, you called out, "Neteyam, Lo'ak, you, and me, we're racing. Now, I know you're used to going below twenty miles an hour, but try to keep up okay?"

Scoffing, Jake shrugged, "You must have forgotten, y/n, but I was born to do this."

"Right, right. And that was when again? Before the time of the First Songs?" You feigned a pout at him, fake doe eyes as you retorted sarcastically.

Kiri, who was merely enjoying the scenery, snickered at your joke, recognizing your humor as she praised you, "That was funny!"

"Oh, you guys are sooo losing." Lo'ak yelled out confidently.

"Rules? One lap back to the base and the first one back here wins?" Neteyam suggested.

Exchanging looks with one another, you all nodded, agreeing the terms.

"Kiri count us down!" Lo'ak insisted, and she groaned at the request but ultimately agreed.

The four of you lined up beside one another, you sandwiched between Neteyam, who was on your right, and Lo'ak on your left.

"What are you going to give me when I win?" Lo'ak asked you. indelicate in his tone.

"A kiss on the cheek." You teased, before facing forward.

"Are you being serio—" Lo'ak let out, but the sound of Kiri's loud "Go!" interrupted him.

Hearing her first syllable, you darted off, taking the lead, Neteyam and Jake close beside you, while Lo'ak slightly trailed behind, your response delaying him.

The sun was setting, the sky darkening slightly as warm hues of orange, yellow, and red took over. You dodged the floating rocks skillfully weaving your way through, your body leaning forward as you accelerated further and further.

The sight of the base was ahead, and Neteyam still matching your speed glanced over at you. You took the opportunity to dive under him when he did, your ikran vertical for a moment then flattening out as you sped forward.

You were the first to make it to the edge of the base, swiftly turning around and unexpectedly, everyone else had also caught up with you.

Jake, determined to win, flew above then downward in front of you, blocking your path and forcing you suddenly upside down.

With a new perspective, you caught sight of a shortcut, steering yourself there. Lo'ak, having known about that spot from previous races followed after you, the two of you zigzagging between each other.

The two of you were pulling ahead, with Neteyam and Jake mere inches from you both. Seeing Neytiri and Kiri, with every ounce of strength, you gained momentum with ferocity, advancing toward them. But, Lo'ak was right next to you, and smirking, he matched your speed, inching and inching forward, the last few seconds of the race suspenseful as the two of you shot forward past Neytiri and Kiri.

Reaching past the finish line, you turned around to see Neteyam and Jake crossing it. You saw Jake biting the bottom of his lip in disappointment at his defeat, granting you a satisfied grin.

"Who won? Definitely me, right?" Lo'ak yelled at his sister.

But, she had no clue, looking at her mother, who also was at a loss for words.

"No, no you're being delusional. I passed them first." You disagreed, your eyes looking for confirmation in Kiri's.

"Um, guys. I think it was a tie." Kiri replied, putting her hand at the back of her neck.

"It was y/n!" Tuk cried out from where she was seated with her mother.

"See!" You emphasized, turning to Lo'ak.

"Tuk is eight! She can barely tell the difference between a direhorse and a hexapede!" Lo'ak reasoned.

"Okay, then we're having a rematch. From here to the top of that mountain over there, toward the horizon." You pointed and his eyes followed your finger.

"I'm getting that kiss on the cheek." Lo'ak stated, and without another word, you two were off, any consideration of Jake's disapproval gone with the wind.

Neytiri caught onto Jake's worrying concern, easing it as she urged, "It is their last day in The Forest, Ma Jake. Let them enjoy it. Let y/n enjoy it, hmm? They'll come home soon enough for dinner. Let us go back."

Although he hated the idea of the two of you alone without his protection, the thought almost sending him into oblivion, he listened to Neytiri.

Flying had always been your favorite part about being a Marine, and when you had come to Pandora, you had always wanted to fly as you were now—no constrictions, no orders to obey, no mission to complete.

And after twenty years or so, you finally got to.

Through the endless Hallelujah Mountains, in and out of the entanglement of vines, and past the wispiness of the clouds, you slashed at the currents with elegant speed, surging freely in the flux. Once you came to a stopping point, landing on one of the nearby cliffs, Lo'ak's ikran hit the ground first, signaling his victory.

Yet you were too engrossed by the nature around you to realize that fact as you dismounted your ikran, eyes widened as you took it all in. The grass atop the cliff waved at you as the wind cascaded through it, and you looked out into the seemingly endless landscape, breathing in the freshness of the air and doing your best to commit the moment into your memory.

"Ahem." Lo'ak had his hands behind his back, his gaze expectant as he leaned forward, turning his cheek to you, "I think you owe me something."

“Fine, fine.” You gave in, stepping closer to him.

Leaning forward, you hovered over his cheek, about to press your lips to it, but as you did so, the dots on Lo'ak's skin began to glow, signaling the dawn of the night. Beyond, the darkening of the sky began to awaken the bioluminescene of the forest, the sun disappearing behind you and replacing it was the bright white moon.

You gasped in awed wonder, pulling away as you shifted your attention to the change of your scenery. You never got tired of the way The Forest would illuminate like this, the glow of it so vividly shimmering against the black of nightfall.

And while your eyes were busy, Lo'ak's were too, focusing on your figure as you walked away from him.

"You—"

"Shhh" You put your finger up, "I'm looking at all of this."

He grabbed onto your tail playfully, "And I'm—"

You whipped your body around to face him, defensive as you put your hands out, lunging to grab his tail in retaliation. He caught your hand as you leaped, pulling you forward.

He continued what he was saying, "And I'm looking at you."

Lo'ak paused and you could no longer distinguish the mischievous glint in his eyes as they bore into you, his affection dripping like honey.

Slowly, he continued to pull you forward, gently closing the gap between you. You did nothing to brush him off, too entranced as you took those small steps.

His hand still in yours, he tilted his head slightly, his voice soft, but firm.

"I See You."

You blinked up at him, a fog taking over your brain, your mouth open, but nothing coming out as you stood, stunned.

There was silence between the two of you, everything blurring as your vision fixated on one another. The tranquil of The Forest lent comforting warmth that blanketed the two of you, contrasting the rapid pumping of both of your hearts.

And perhaps it was because you were wrapped up in that moment, so taken by his words that you felt emboldened. Hooking your finger onto his necklace, you pulled him toward you, connecting your lips.

Lo'ak only widened his eyes in surprise for a second before he melted into you, trailing his hand up your arm as he cupped your cheek and the other took its place on your back, the gap between you closing as he deepened the kiss with tender adoration.

You allowed yourself to be in this moment with Lo'ak cherishing the suspension of reality, your mind calm, no ruminating about the purpose the Great Mother has for you, no concern of your father's revenge poisoning your thoughts, no distress found from losing your brother.

Enthralled in that freedom and peace, you felt as if you were in a dream, a good one that you would keep close to your heart.

You ghosted your fingers around his collarbone to grab onto the back of his neck, moving in rhythm with him and meeting him with the same passion before you quickly pulled away, the taste of his lips lingering on yours as you caught your breath.

Lo'ak, still in an enamored daze, lightly grazed your lips with his two fingers, a huge smile on his face, "I'm gonna expect this every time I win."

Your mind catching up with the desires of your heart, you repositioned your hands onto his shoulders, straightening your elbows to put distance between you and him.

"This was a one time thing." You clarified as you mentally scolded yourself for being so impulsive.

Furrowing his eyebrows at you, he met you with a confused expression, slight hurt lacing it, "Why?"

You patted his shoulders, sheepishly smiling, "We're friends."

"For now." Lo'ak said with a quickness.

"Lo'ak." You gave him a stern look, but you were still clearly flustered.

Lo'ak chuckled, "You kissed me!"

You had no rational comeback, spitting out whatever came to your head as you came to your own defense, stuttering, "Well, that was your fault! You were staring at me the way that you always stare at me but then you—"

"Then I what?" Lo'ak was wholly amused. He knew you liked him back, and he beamed with internal satisfaction.

Frustrated, you scratched the back of your neck, "You can't just say what you said, Lo'ak. It means something, it means everything!"

"Well, I meant it." Lo'ak shrugged casually, crossing his arms, "And I'm not taking it back."

You felt childish at this point, hesitating in pure disbelief as you let out a breath.

Uncrossing his arms and reading your expression, Lo'ak aimed to assure you, "If you want it to be a one time thing, then it's a one time thing. We're friends, of course we're friends."

You hardly believed him though, squinting at him as you tried to discern his intentions, expecting a mischievous comment.

And you were right in thinking that, Lo'ak looking up to the sky as he let his voice trail into the wind, "Even though you had nooo problem getting real close to me when we were in the air," He made eye contact with you again, "We're friends."

“We both know you did that on purpose," You warned, putting a finger up at him pointedly, "And also, you fly your ikran like you're drunk.” You scrunched your nose, playfully insulting him.

He brushed a stray hair away from your face, “I never did thank you, you know for defending me.”

You pinched his ear, causing him to wince, “Took you long enough.”

He rubbed his ear to ease the pain, “Look, I’m not the perfect soldier or the perfect son, so I’m not used to it. That’s why I didn’t know what to say at first.” Vulnerability coated his words as his hand went to the back of his neck.

“Well, you're perfect to me.” You had uttered it so nonchalantly, shrugging your shoulders even, as if you had said it countless times before.

You watched his expression soften at your words, his gaze on you already shrouded with affection now decorated in adoration, his heart beating so fast he swore it was going to pop out of his chest.

Whirling around, he put his hands at his temples then extended his arms out, palms outstretched to the sky, the tips of his fingers in your view, "You say these things, and you're just begging to be kissed. I swear."

"Don't make me punch you again." You warned, balling your fists up.

"Stand down there, beautiful. I'm only joking." Lo'ak put a hand up, easing your fists down.

You sighed, "What I'm trying to say is that even though your dad is my best friend, I don't agree with everything he does. And that includes how he treats you."

Lo'ak was about to make another flirtatious joke, but you continued, "And your siblings."

He put his hands at his hips, looking down at the ground, "Had to bring them into it too, huh?" He muttered, "So romantic."

"I knew Jake when he was like you. Stubborn. Troublesome—"

"Fun?" Lo'ak added.

You chuckled, nodding, "I'm surprised he's so strict now."

"Trust me, the way he acts when you're around is more surprising. He hasn't joked like that since Neteyam, Kiri, and I were kids. But that was before the Sky People came back and started building that city."

And suddenly, the worries you had came flooding back, the harsh reality sinking its teeth into the dream that you so desperately wanted to stay in.

Yet, that was the thing about dreams.

Sooner or later, you have to wake up.

The People.

The Forest.

They would become relics to you as you once became a relic to it.

-

Everything was set by the next day, and just as quickly as you had settled into camp, you were leaving once again for a brand new horizon.

The People had gathered onto the ground to attend the ceremony of the new Olo’eyktan, but what was meant to be a joyous celebration was tainted by overwhelming loss and sadness.

Jake knew his successor, Tarsem, was wise beyond his years, that he would make a strong Olo'eyktan.

But as you looked upon Jake's face, his expression strong and stoic, you could still see the pain in his eyes.

The memories you had in your new body didn't remember the Final Battle, the day that you first saw Jake in the air on Toruk. You didn't remember it, but you knew you felt proud. It was who he was always meant to be.

The leader must die, so the leader can be born.

Toruk Makto will disappear.

The People will be safe.

With this new beginning came tearful goodbyes as the Omaticaya bid you all farewell, and you had maintained your strength until you saw Norm and Max. You couldn’t hold your tears in as you gave them both one final hug. 

Mo'at gave her final embraces before your departure, and when she finally got to you, she put her hands on your shoulders, “My child, whatever you may experience beyond this forest, the Great Mother has ordained you as one of The People. Do not forget that.” 

You gave her one last hug, “I won’t. I promise.”

You were at the edge of a cliff, vast, blue, open sea ahead of you, ikrans ready to fly. But you were hardly focused on what was ahead as you looked back at The Forest, etching and ingraining every detail of it in your mind.

Into the air, suddenly the feeling of leaving felt like true resignation, the momentary banter between you and Jake forgotten as you looked out into the open sea, seemingly endless, full of possibilities. But what was meant to be a fresh start was only cloaked with the sweeping melancholy that you and the Sullys felt inside as The Forest, the colossal trees, the lush landscape, and the presence of the aviary creatures amidst the foliage became a green mirage, smaller and smaller as you ventured further out until the sight of it could no longer be seen.

One life ends.

Another begins.

-

| prologue | chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 |

Author's Note

to my lovers clan,

i'm so so sorry for taking so long to give you guys an update. life has been insane these past two years and i finally was able to finish up this chapter and move forward with the series.

in truth, my creativity was so shot and i couldn't bring myself to write work that i wasn't proud of. you guys deserve the absolute best!

for everyone who has waited for my series, i really really love you and appreciate you. to know that there are people out there that have taken the time to read my work, it is a blessing.

if you liked the chapter, let me know what you think in the comments! i always love reading your thoughts!

please always take care of yourselves!

love,

nana <3

~~side note here: going to break down some of my choices down for this chapter, so if you’re interested, read on!

i really leaned into the themes of friendship and family in this chapter and i focused on the forest and flashbacks because this will be the last time we'll see them in this setting.

i fell in love with the first movie so long ago, that when i rewatched the extended version recently, i realized that i forgot that neytiri had a sister!

i thought that the flashback i added with her really enriched the storyline and the connection between Grace, Jake, and the reader, while adding more volume to HOW two worlds could collide—how a boss could become a friend.

Spider getting captured right after they connected too was so necessary because I really wanted him to feel so conflicted — he had just connected with his sister, felt a bond with her, and suddenly he realizes that he can't fully hate his father. It mirrors how the reader also feels about Quaritch, but her history with him, her sense of duty and moral compass guide her more toward the Sullys, while Spider struggles with it a little more.

And then these moments with Jake and y/n too! Like, they are BEST friends. But to him, you've always been the baby, so him getting all protective now that he's a dad was a comedic choice that I couldn't resist. Cause it's like... Jake that's your whole ass son and you're cockblocking???? And then of course, Neytiri, even though she doesn't outwardly show it (like her mother Mo'at our grand shipper of the Lo'ak reader ride), she doesn't mind that Lo'ak is clearly interested in you

THENNNN,

we have our stars of the show, the slow burn romance we're all dying for— Lo'ak and reader.

LIKE SHE KISSED HIM? (I mean, shit me too honestly, but damn, who would have thought?)

I was originally gonna have him kiss her first, but it felt so much more of a natural move for her to just do it, the moment so right for her and then the INSTANT regret of it on her end, and Lo'ak teasing her after—it encompasses how easy their relationship is and how willing Lo'ak is to just take things at her pace, even though he's ready to dive right in.

~

also, p.s. i still have my taglists and will update it, but with how the character limit is, i wasn't able to put everybody down on this post.

taglist:

@mae-is-crazy @mrs-sullys-blog @23victoria @neteyamforlife  @a-queen-blr @neteyamslovr @fifty-shades-of-mischeif @pretty-npeach @tonni30  @itsemy01 @jimfiqs

[marvelstan0905]

Random Kenji Sato Boyfriend Headcanons:

TW : fluffy/slight angst/ idk what else lmao

©all rights reserved. the modification, translation, and plagiarism of my work is strictly prohibited.

"Small Gestures"

Kenji is the king of small gestures. This man be peeling your oranges. Feeding you. If you have your menstrual days, Kenji keeps a stack of pads, wet wipes, tampons and clean menstrual cups everywhere and in the car. Kenji is the type to keep notifications on when you have your days or when your ovulating [do with that information what you will😈]

"Communication"

We all know what happened in the movie. We all know that Kenji rarely cries and he holds in his feelings till eventually he kinda bursts. With you, yes you, the best partner, you'd kinda have to coax it out of him. Get him to tell you what's bothering or what's wrong. It would take a lot of patient and understanding. Kenji would really try is damndest to communicate despite his habits.

"Intimacy"

Kenji would be really patient and understanding when it comes to sex and intimacy. The man would praise and worship you all night. We all know this man would be the type to pin your hands above your head and make you look into his eyes. I definetly feel like a Kenji is a hard dom/brat tamer kinda guy. I can definetly see the daddy kink coming. He's definetly an equal giver and receiver. Man's is definetly kinky and I definetly feel like he'd very open to try anything, long as he's in control. And his aftercare is top tier. The hot bath and cuddles with loving affirmations.

"Love & Marriage"

Don't know why, Kenji gives off 'dating to marry' vibes. The man's been distant with everybody, keeping people away at an arm's leg but after finally finding that perfect person. Kenji is all the way. He's commited. Forever. As in you won't shake him off ,even if you try [you wont😑]. He's the most loyal sweetheart and baby ever. Hurting our man here is like killing a puppy. Don't do it. I feel like he'd dead deadass get a tattoo with your name and the date of your birthday. That's how commited he is.

"Chivalry"

I'm talking opening doors, sliding out chairs. Kenji will hold your hand when you go down the stairs and when you're sitting down just to make sure you're safe and make sure you sit nicely. If you wear a skirt and it's cold, he'll lay his jacket on your legs. If you're cold in general his jacket is yours. His arms are yours. He just wants to make sure you're warm and happy. God forbid, it rains. Kenji won't even allow you outside because he doesn't want you to get cold but if you were already outside. You'd have most of the umbrella.

"Clinginess & Attention"

Clingy. He'll never ever let you go. Once you're his, you're trapped and commited [a dream ,really😌] Kenji would always find some time of way to be touching you. Somehow. His pinkies linked with yours or you're feet are touching. He just needs the contact. He's a clingy, baby. He needs your attention and love. He's been deprived🥺 give him the attention he deserves.

-What do you guys think? I've decided to open up requests but they'll be open starting 26 June at 5PM [MT ] up until 28th June 1PM [MT].I don't want to be overwhelmed or swapped!I've been feeling a little burned out nowadays hehe so I need to recuperate! Speaking of requests, If I don't feel like I can do it or it's just something I'm not comfortable with ,I will delete your ask! I'm sorry! Thank you so much for the love and support!

Gif credit @soranatus

[wisteria-lodge]

What makes you think JK Rowling didn’t want people feeling sorry for Draco? Did she say she hates him?

I definitely do not think she likes him. Here's a non-exhaustive list of things she's said about Draco Malfoy:

[I have been] pouring cold common sense on ardent readers’ daydreams as I told them, rather severely, that Draco was not concealing a heart of gold under all that sneering and prejudice

Draco, who, whatever he looks like, is not a nice man. It’s a romantic, but unhealthy, and unfortunately all too common delusion of girls, that they are going to change someone.... it is uncomfortable and unhealthy and it actually worried me a little bit, to see young girls swearing undying devotion to this really imperfect character, because there must be an element in there, that "I'd be the one who changes him." I mean, I understand the psychology of it, but it is pretty unhealthy. So, a couple of times I have written back, possibly quite sharply, saying, "You want to rethink your priorities here."

Draco turns 35 today. I'm not invited to the party, mainly because I keep telling girls they're misguided to fancy him.

So he's shut down his pity, enabling him to bully effectively. He's shut down compassion — how else would you become a Death Eater? So he suppresses virtually all of the good side of himself.

Everybody recognises Draco because everybody has known somebody like him. Such people’s belief in their own superiority can be infuriating, laughable or intimidating, depending on the circumstances in which one meets them.

Dumbledore tells Harry, at the end of Order of the Phoenix, that it is an essential part of his humanity that he can feel such pain; with Draco, I was attempting to show that the denial of pain and the suppression of inner conflict can only lead to a damaged person (who is much more likely to inflict damage on other people).

(this last one is weird to me, because... Draco has a lot of problems, but "suppressing his inner conflict" is not one of them. There is a character who we see crying because he's conflicted and emotionally overwhelmed... and it's not Harry.)

[lovelyhavenn]

ONLY YOU | BUCKY BARNES X SUPERMODEL! READER

Summary: behind the cameras and flashing lights, you only want bucky barnes. Bucky, haunted by his past and overwhelmed by the glitz of your world, begins to question his worth, convinced she deserves someone better and you remind him that he's the only one you want.

Warning: Smut! Blowjobs, handjobs, dirty talk, praise kink:)

Note: i did not proofread, sorry for any typographical errors ahead ( if there's one)

Bucky met you at a local coffee shop, an underrated coffee shop that people rarely goes to but the coffee and the ambiance is good. It was a moment where you tried to escape the public, to be alone for a moment and the place was perfect, it was quiet and there's no people expect for a few, no one recognized you. That was perfect.

People have often commented that you were an eye catcher. When people pass by you they often did a double look, or even triple, or more. You were elegant, showcased grace with the way you move or talk to people, and you had a killer smile. you are nice to everybody. That's why bucky noticed you.

You thought he approached you for an autograph, or even a picture. But no, he didn't even know you. That was a first, but you liked it. Bucky started talking to you, you started to get to know each other. You liked the fact that bucky did not know you at all, so you can be fully yourself with him. You started dating and eventually became a couple after a few months.

Your relationship with bucky is fun, you had dinner dates, movie nights, grocery dates, late night walks, you did almost everything together. You love him, so dearly. Bucky was just lovable, you love everything about him. And he felt the same for you, bucky adores you, loves you.

You know his line of work, and you often worry about him. Well, the thing is, he doesn't know your work and he only found out that his girlfriend is a fucking supermodel, an international model with multiple magazine covers and billboards. That didn't change the way he looked at you, but it changed the way he looks at himself. He thought he wasn't worthy of you, a goddess, a woman who can have any guy that she wishes.

That started to show when bucky started being insecure with the way he looks, or the way that he's not on the same level as you and he's not telling you. He often compares himself to guys who you've worked with on photoshoots or other projects. he started looking at himself more on the mirror, or how he restricts himself from eating, he tried to not show you, but it started peaking through.

It's your date night tonight, you wore this red backless dress, showcasing your back and curves. While fixing your bag in the kitchen counter, you saw bucky looking at himself in the mirror with a frown in his face.

"Baby, I'm ready, are you?" You asked, walking over to him with a smile on your face. You stood beside him in front of thefull length mirror, looking at him with nothing but love and adoration.

"You look gorgeous, doll. Uh... Yeah, I'm ready," He said. The tone of his voice was unsure when he said he was ready, he started shifting positions, fixing his suit, or his tie, adjusting it here and there even his hair.

"Hey, are you really okay? What's wrong? I can sense it, baby. Come on, tell me," You softly said, holding his hand. You caressed his cheek the moment he looked down, you knew something is up.

"Nothing, really," He sighed heavily. "It's stupid, doll." He added, head hanging low.

"Baby, nothing is stupid especially if it's something that you feel. You can tell me anything, it's not stupid to feel something, or anything." You said, voice soothing him and his mind. You caressed his cheek once more, your fingers laced it self to his chin, getting him to look at you.

"I don't deserve you... I mean look at me. You can have someone who is your league, celebrities or models, anyone who didn't do the shit that i did,"He uttered, voice low yet soft.

"Baby, bucky, look at me. You deserve me as much as i deserve you. I can have anyone who is my league, that's why i have you. I don't really want anyone else if it's not you. Bucky, you're not your past, you're more than just your past, you survived things that others couldn't. For me, you are the bravest person i know. You're the man i love. " You assured him. You don't want anyone else if it's not him. Bucky is the guy for you, and you feel sad that he's not seeing it. Or maybe, you lacked the assurance, you didn't give him enough. And that killed you.

"Is social media or anything that they're saying bothering you?" You asked, slowly.

"No. I've only read good comments... I guess it's just inside me, who's feeling this way. Sorry, it's stupid... I didn't mean to mess up our night, doll." He looked down once more, feeling ashamed of possibly ruining your date night.

"Hey baby, it's not stupid, you're not stupid. I'm sorry, bucky, i feel like i lacked giving you the assurance the same way you've given me-" He tried to cut you off, holding your hand.

"Let me finish, baby. Baby, you're enough for me, even more than enough, you're perfect for me, baby. You take care of me so good, you love me so good that nobody can match it. You do so much for me, you go to my shoots even if it ends in ungodly hours. You do so much, baby. I love you, so much. I don't need somebody else, i just want you. They all see me as the name, as the model, but you... You saw my heart, you saw me and not the name. And I see you, Bucky. I see your heart. I see your strength. You're my home." You kissed his lips softly, making sure that he feels it, that he feels your love for him.

You pulled Bucky for a hug as he rested his head on your shoulder.

"You're my home too," He whispered. He held you like you are the only constant in his life, which is true. You don't plan on leaving him, not now, never.

"Don't you ever think that you're no good for me and that celebrities or actors are better than you. They aren't. I can show you that you're the only one i want, not them, just you," You whispered softly, almost nibbling on his ear. He moaned softly, feeling your lips touch his ear, his sensitive spot.

You looked at him innocently, slowly lowering yourself to your knees, slowly touching his belt.

"Let me worship you, baby... Let me make you feel so good that you forget about everything and you'll only remember my love for you... Is that good?" You slowly unbuckled his belt, your eyes not leaving his as you pulled his pants down on the floor. He bit his lips when he felt your fingers on his boxers.

"I need to hear you, baby... Will you let me worship you?" You asked once more, teasing him by playing with the band of his boxers.

"Yes... Fuck, yes, doll... " He whimpered, knees weak upon seeing you kneeling in front of him.

"Good... I fucking love you, baby. Only you," You whispered as you pulled his boxers down. You touched the base of his cock, teasing him as bucky closed his eyes shut due to the sudden touch. He breathed heavily, chest rising up and down.

"You do such a good job of making me feel so loved, baby. A fucking good job... " You licked his tip, earning a moan from bucky.

"I don't want another guy, i just want you, baby. Only you. Only you get to see me like this, to feel me like this. Fuck so good, baby. You're doing so good f'me... " You took his length in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down as you played with length with your tongue.

"Fuck, doll... Shit, s'good... " He moaned out, biting his inner cheek just to stop himself from moaning loudly.

"Yeah, so good? Let me hear you, baby. Will you let me hear yah? Don't stop those pretty noises f'me, okay? Baby, you're so good... I can do this all day." You moaned at his cock. You spit on his cock before pumping him on your hands, looking at him seductively with your lips parted and lips filled with his pre-cum.

When he looked down on you, he bit his lips, his cock twitching just by looking at you. With him twitching, you took that as a sign to slap his cock a few times on your tongue, showing him, he lets out a moan.

"I'm your pretty girl, baby... I'm your fucking cocksleeve. I'm yours, baby. I'm all yours, no one can ever have me." You kissed his cock before taking him all in your mouth again, not breaking the eye contact as his cock goes in and out of your mouth. Your tongue circling on his cock, spit dripping from your lips. His cock twitched once more on your mouth, getting turned on with you sucking him off.

Your hair was messy, face filled with his pre-cum that you played with, your red lipstick smudged on your face and some on his cock, fuck, you look like a goddess.

"Fuck, doll... You're doing so good. Shit, you feel so good... " He moaned out, not caring if anyone heard him. All he knew is that his girl is sucking him off amazingly that he can't contain his sinful noises. He kept telling you how good you felt, how you're making him feel good, and that he's only yours.

"Yeah you like that? So good for you, baby. You can do anything you want with me, baby. You can do anything. I'm yours, baby. I'm yours, only yours." You said, releasing his cock with a pop, but you are not done, you put him in your mouth once more.

"Fuck... Can i fuck your mouth, doll?" He asked, politely. You looked at him through your eyelashes, you nodded, opening your mouth wider as he held you hair back. He startes fucking your mouth, hitting the back of your throat.

You pulled your dress down, releasing your breast, playing with it while your other hand rested on his hip.

"Fuck! Fuck! You feel so good... So good for me... I'm yours! I'm yours, doll... Yours...can you say it, doll?" He pulled his cock out of your mouth, smearing spit on your face using his cock. It was filthy, but it made you weak.

"You're mine, baby. Only mine. Only you can make me feel so fucking good! Fuck, i love you so much, baby. " You moaned, feeling his cock on your face.

"Only you can make me feel so good, doll. I fuckin' love you. I love you so damn much. " He entered your mouth again, you rolled your eyes back as he kept hitting the back of your throat. You can feel his cock twitching as he fucks your mouth.

"I'm cummin', doll... Fuck, I'm cumming. Where do you want it, doll?" Bucky said, still rocking his hips as he fucks your mouth. You motioned for him to released it in your face, his pace increased and tears started pouring from your eyes from so much pleasure. Bucky closed his eyes, chasing his high and when he did he pulled his cock out of your mouth. Jerking off in front of you as you put your tongue out, waiting for his release.

"Fuck... " He released his cum on your face, catching it with your tongue. You scraped his cum off your face and licked your finger clean while maintaining eye contact with him.

"You did so well, doll..." He helped you stand up, holding your waist, close to him.

"I only want you, baby, no one else has my heart." You said, followed by a heavy breath. "And, baby, don't you ever compare yourself to any celebrities or actors, they look like shit next to you. Have you seen them, you look like a god next to them." You giggled, so did bucky. "And... I'd only drop on my knees for you, anytime... Anywhere you like. Just you, baby." You whispered.

"I love you, doll. I want you, i only want you for me... Let me make you feel good too... I'm gonna make my girl feel so good, you did a good job, doll. " He smiled, kissing your lips as he pulled you into your bedroom.

[malleide-fever]

why is your art so shape (walks out with your art stuffed inside my pockets) FR THO THIS IS SOOOOO GOOOODDD like I just went through all your posts and its chef's kiss SO UNIQUE AND BEEAAAUTIFUL i love the way you draw them, you highlight everybody's best features and THE CLOTHES. THE CUNT. THE FA SHION. love this a LOT

I reaaally like Idia's ENORMOUS FLUFFY HAIR and his bulky hoodie, also his face lololol he looks a lot like the og Disney Hades, wanna see him open a big smile and show all of those teeth

ALSO MALLEUS, MALLEUS IS SO. UGHHHHH i can feel the WHIMSY radiating off of him, just look at those eyes, they're soooo sweet and kind but also. OMINOUS. He really looks like something out of an old dark fantasy movie I wanna take a bite off of him

ANYWAYS I WOULD SPEAK ALL OF MY TRUTH SINCE I ALSO L OVED YOUR VIL, LIKE, THOSE PEARLS IN HIS HAIR, THE FLOW OF HIS CLOTHES????? a true queen, omg, i love the red on him AASQJQSE

I'm dying to see what Riddle looks like in your style, his og dorm uniform is already a packed mess of style, shapes and patterns, I'm sure you would really elevate it (I just imagine you making his ahoge into a giant heart just like you did with Malleus' horns lololol) ANYWAYS LOVE YOU ACCOUNT HAVE A GREAT DAY XOXO

Thank you so much for the kind words ❤❤❤ I appreciate them greatly 🥰

As for Riddle.....I cannot draw him properly without designing his mom first. Because she raised him to be just like her (funnily enough, the way I pictured her is scarily similar to how she looks like in the comics- except that in my head she was a bit thicker like the actual Queen of hearts from the animated movie...I also hc Riddle's dad to be small, and that's where he inherited his height from 😭) (Ignore how stiff Riddle's pose is...actually don't it's in his character to look like he got a stick up there)

For his face, I wanted his cheeks to be really soft and rosy...I need Riddle's face to look cute (it's Floyd's fault 😭, he put the cute petite red goldfishie in my head) However, I wanted his eyes to be striking. Deep enough to make you fess up your mistake with just one disapproving look (skill acquired from mama Rosehearts)

As for his clothing, I took inspiration from two things: those young prince designs with the pantaloons and a boy scout.

I wanted his clothes to look like they're eating him up. Like they're a little too big for him but he makes it ✨work ✨ because I wanted to show that responsibility and expectations are overwhelming him without making it too obvious. I also need to mention that his face is painted white, because insert deep meaningful "mask your mistakes" symbolism here.

The royal prince look is there because...well judging by how ridiculous the Queen's rules are, the clothes she likes are probably just as ridiculous (plus I think that they're really cute and cute Riddle is a necessity)

The Boy Scout is there because well, boy scouts work towards a certain goal. Then they get rewarded with an insignia (feels good in the moment but those little trinkets are kind of useless and for looks only....tho it's nice to bedazzle bags with em..not like Riddle would be allowed to do that LMAO) and then they work towards another goal

This constant work-"reward"-work thing is common in Riddle's household. And you bet he's a completionist and wants all the insignia no matter how much they end up weighing on him in the end

I also removed the crowns from his design because he has too many symbols (roses, all card symbols and a crown... Very hard to balance) You can headcannon the little triangle design on his hat as a crown tho if you feel like it :)

[larry-russell]

My thoughts of episode 4:

Give me more shots of the Russell house. I love to see as much as possible of the house. More rooms, more of everything. Love to see more of the Van Rhijn/ Forte house as well btw.

Finally a conversation in which Agnes and Ada are not fighting with each other. But how humiliated Agnes must have felt that Ada is now paying for everything. Did she really lose everything? I'm asking cause when Larry later talks to Jack and calls him almost as rich as Aunt Ada but definitely richer than Aunt Agnes, she maybe hasn't lost everything or it's cause the house is hers?

I'm sure Agnes would have liked Gladys if she would have met and therefore known het but she is judging her based on how much she didn't like her mother - I understand that. It's not okay but she simply didn't like Bertha and how she is selling her daughter off is another reason for sure.

I love, love, love how everybody is supporting Jack and guess what I believe even Mrs. Armstrong does.

I'm so sorry for Aunt Ada that she is believing in that medium, that she is missing Luke that much. That women is a sharlaten for sure, Aunt Agnes is right. But no matter how sad I'm for her, that meeting between Ada, Agnes and Madame Dashkova was amazing 😅

But pls stop fighting you two.

I swear I've bloody no idea who is leaking the news to the press. Does it have to be someone we know? Yes, it has to, right?

I'm so, so sorry for Gladys. I totally understand why she is staying in her room. If not even Larry or her dad, were able to help her.

I HATE Dr. Kirkland's mum. She is an awful person. There are only a few characters I hate in this series and she is one of them.

I love Aunt Monica!

How she is getting to Bertha, how she knows what to say to make her feel unsercure. But aside from that she seems to be a nice person, who really cares for Bertha and her family and everybody seems to love her.

So! Can we pls all say: thank you, Larry, for making Jack rich! Yes, we thought that you were going to screw Jack over. OH NO WAIT! I never thought that! I knew he would try to help him ad best as he can and here we go, Mr. Trotter you are rich now and you can do whatever you want.

Btw. I'm sure he will pay everybody their money back + some earnings. Also, how hilarious was Jack's reaction when Larry was dealing with the men interested in the clock 😅.

I was wondering what he would do when they were able to sell the clock, not telling the others is totally understandable, but at some point, he will have to. But as long as only Mrs. Bauer knows, no one will find out. They are his family, and the truth is I don't want to see him leave. Not to mention how overwhelming it would be for him, to live alone, without fhem.

Did I mention that I hate Dr. Kirkland's mother. God she is awful and Dr. Kirkland knows. Run Peggy. Or if you can't make sure William is choosing you and not his morher.

That dinner. Ehrm. Awkward is not even a fitting word to describe that come together. Lady Sarah is cold as a fish (quoting George) and I'm sure going to be the real problem and not Hector, who seems nicer than I thought.

Was that coffee cup accident really necessary @Bertha? You could have told her she should wear something else or make Larry or George tell her, they would have.

Finally some good moments between Bertha and George. He really regrets his decision to let Bertha sell Gladys off. He knows Gladys won't be happy in England but he was too busy with his big project to interfere.

Speaking of that, he is gambling and hopefully not loosing everything. I know that he believes in his idea but I'm not convinced it will work out.

Bertha's idea to make Marian talk to Gladys was a good one. I liked how Marian tried to stay pragmatic and tell Gladys the truth, how she knew that they day would come and that what happened was always out of her control.

Love how Gladys mentions Larry not couse she is angry.or bitter about the fact that Larry and Marian are possibly/ hopefully.🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 able to marry but because they are friends and she knows Larry and Marian love each other. That makes it even worse that she has to marry the Duke, that there is no way out.

The bridesmaid dresses looked so good and Marian looked beautiful. What a lovely moment in the Van Rhijn/ Forte house.

So, Lina Astor is believing her daughter had an affair but not the fact that she had one was/ is her problems but that they found out about it.

The church looked beautiful. Turner being invited? Why? Everybody gossiping. Who would have thought 😅.

George talking to Gladys was so hard to watch. I wish he would have made Bertha stop and not ruin Gladys life. Hopefully I'm wrong and her life isn't ruined but for now she must feel like her life is over. She will miss Larry and her father and while I knew that she couldn't back out of this, I've hoped she would.

I don't think I want to ever rewatch that church scene. I felt sick when I watched it. The way how they filmed it, it really hurt watching this lokf walk to the alther and everything after that.

Especially how worried and sad Larry, Aunt Monica and even George looked like in opposite to Bertha who ass crying cause she was so happy - honestly? What kind of mother is she? Didn't she recognise how scared her daughter was? Was climbing up the social ledder worth doing this to her?

My most fave moments:

Larry making sure that Marian is becoming a bridesmaid as she deserves and also to support Gladys. Love how he didn't let his mum win this time of course with a little help of George who was very amused to see how Larry stood up against Bertha. Knowing how much in love he seems to be with Marian but also cause he was right about Marian and also about Bertha's sister Monica and that she should be invited. Loved how confident Larry was and how he gave no fu**s when his mother was trying to do her *thing*.

Bertha telling Larry and George that Marian agreed to be a bridesmaid and Larry beaming. I would have looooved to see George's reaction of how Larry was hoping he could take her down the aile as a groomsmen and how he was told: nope, not happening, we are doing it the english way. 😅

Aunt Monica arriving and Bertha's rection to see her and that Larry invited her. George seems to really like her, both of them having a good relationship as it seems.

Aunt Agnes visiting Marian in her room, to show her Glady's weddijg dress in the papers and to gossip about the wedding. Also, to tell Marian that she kmows about Larry and her... them having feelings for each other and Larry possibly asking her for her hand. Why else would she become a bridesmaid, being put into spotlight. And she approves!!!! I knew it. AGNES LIKES LARRY and wants Marian to be happy. Pls more moments like this.

Bonus:

Bertha's facial expression when Larry tells her that she should invite her sister. It almost looked like she was in pain 😅.

George watching Larry and Bertha argue about Marian and Aunt Monica, watching them like on court watching a tennis game 😅

[jacqulinetan]

On writing fanfiction

Exactly one person hinted that this might be helpful and I thought, well, okay, why not? tonight I have the time. I've been collecting thoughts for awhile and posting fic for more than a decade (writing longer than that!) so why not create a little manifesto of sorts.

A [not at all comprehensive] guide to writing and sharing fic - for beginners - from someone who is serious about writing fanfic as a hobby but casual about everything else:

On logistics:

Where should one write? I use google docs. Recently there's been some discussion about not using gdocs because of AI concerns, and I think if you are sharing nsfw files with other users there is a nebulous risk of losing access to the file... so I've heard. Tbh I cannot speak to the actual risk of either of these things. But I like gdocs because it's free and I can access the same doc from my phone as my desktop which is good for on-the-go thoughts. Other programs that people like are scrivener (costs money - but everybody who uses it says its worth it) and libre office (I tried this and didn't like it, but only because I'm used to gdocs). There are other programs out there, but these are the ones I feel I hear about the most. For me personally, I also have a notebook. If I'm inspired and want to get some scene or dialogue out quickly, writing analog is fastest for me and I find my thoughts flow well like that too.

Where should one post? Archive of our own dot org. There are other fic sites (wattpad) but none of them have the legendary tagging system that ao3 has - more on this later. On ao3 you will need to create an account (if you need an invitation, I'm not sure if you do, but if you do I will personally give one to you, just dm me). But you can post fic under your user handle or anonymously. When you browse the site, you will see that everything is separated by fandom, then by pairing (though non pairing/romance or 'gen fic' is fine too), then by characters involved, then other tags. I imagine it's overwhelming if you are not there a lot, but when you post, the form guides you for what to fill out (e.g. you will fill out the fields before you drop in your fic). You can always edit later if you want to change things around, but ao3 does not have an algorithm, so people will find your fic based on 1) the time it was originally posted or more likely 2) the tags that give an idea of what the story is about. I could write for ten thousand years about the merits of ao3, but like most things, you have to just get in there and try it out.

Other people who are smarter than me and know more than me can write and have written huge, in depth explanations for how to use features, and work skins, and the beautiful bells and whistles of ao3, but here is the down and dirty kind of explaining for sorting and filtering. I'm not going for nuance, I'm going for broad stroke understanding, and the nuance can come later. On ao3 fic 'metrics' we have hits (clicks), kudos (basically a 'like'), and bookmarks -- as a reader you can sort by any of these, which basically means you can move more popular fics to the top based on your preferences. And as a writer, it means you are hungry for people to kudos or bookmark your fic so that it potentially gets more eyes on it. Well, that's kinda putting the cart before the horse so to speak, if you're just getting started, but it is nice for your work to get feedback.

Tagging beyond pairing and character is important because it's how people will differentiate your fic from the others. This is things like 'canon compliant' or 'post canon' or 'coffee shop au' or 'enemies to lovers' or 'anal sex' or 'Bottom Shiro' or literally anything. Literally anything. These can be big tags ("wrangled tags") that everybody uses commonly enough that they are their own kind of category ('dom/sub') or random silly things you want to advertise with (e.g. 'blatant disregard for hoverbike safety'). You can add as many tags as you like. There are no rules to writing fanfic but tagging content warnings appropriately is important to readers, and you will find YOUR people most expediently if you tag honestly and robustly. Again, I could write 150k just about the intricacies of using ao3 as a reader AND writer, but 1) there are other folks who have done it better already/know more than me and 2) you really just gotta get in there and play around to understand it.

I am always happy to talk about fic and so if any questions about logistics arise, I will happily try to help. ao3 also has help pages and support. One random but important note is that the crux of ao3 is that it is an ARCHIVE only (so there is minimal moderation of content, to an extent ) and not for profit, so you must never ever mention money exchanged for fic there. if a work is a commission or something of that nature, that is fine, just mention it on socials or elsewhere, do not put put that in the summary or author's notes, etc as it will cause your work to be removed for legal reasons.

On writing:

The best advice for writing is the easiest to give and the most useless to receive: you really do just have to write. Write, write, write. That is the only way you will find what works for you, the only way you will get better, the only way you will tell your story. Since my goal is not to be patronizing, I will not say that. I will try to give some random and interesting tips that really get to the heart of what I feel you need to know (in my world of healthcare we call this type of information 'clinical pearls' LOL)

Getting started -

It's likely that there is a specific scene you want to write and that's why you're considering starting a piece in the first place. That's grand. All you need is that little bit of inspo!! when you're crafting a story around that point, try to drop the reader in at a time that is interesting/exciting/unexpected. if you're just starting out and all you have is the inspo scene, write that. then you can decide if that gives a full enough picture on it's own (fics don't have to be hugely long, esp in the beginning of your writing journey) or what else you want to add to be satisfied.

For me, I usually have an idea in a google doc and some bits of dialogue or random stuff that goes along with the idea as I got random inspiration. then when I want to start on a new work, I try to conjure up one scene that will get me rolling -- from there I can just keep writing what comes next. As a less experienced fanfic writer I wrote more outlines and was more methodical. when I'm writing now I don't really know how things end (except for in a very vague sense) until I'm actually writing the ending. this makes writing a lot of fun for me. when I write fic, I am my own audience and I am writing for my own entertainment.

Establish a setting -

I feel like a lot of less experienced writers fail to place these characters in a setting. If I open a fic and it's just mostly dialogue (chat fic, I'm looking at you, darling) I'm thinking ?? okay ?? are they floating in space??? what is happening?? I don't like chat fic. Give people an anchor at the very least and try to remember that the reader doesn't have your Mind's Eye and they will likely not know what you are imagining unless you explicitly state it. this might seem obvious, but writers who are good at setting are remarkably good at writing, I think. also, I do not like to open with dialogue but that's personal preference.

Magical paperclip moment -

Along the same lines as grounding the characters in setting, I like to add in what I call in my mind 'magical paperclip moments.' This is something I made up (I'm insane, btw) after being really impressed with a writer's work (I think in the hetalia fandom, I wish I knew the exact fic because it quite literally changed my life). anyways, the characters are having a conversation in the fic, and the author randomly added in a line about one of the guys playing with a paperclip while they talked. It did not move the plot forward, it was not important to the guy's character, it was just a random idiosyncrasy that made the story feel real. magical stuff. I love that.

Decide on vibes-

This is a big one for me!!! at the beginning of my working google doc I usually have some random notes, a running list of tags, etc, but I also have a category for ~vibes~ In other words, I am thinking hard about what kind of overall feeling I want the piece to have, and I am thinking about what kind of feeling I want to invoke in the reader. should this story be dreamy? Gritty? Fast paced? Emotional? And then it really helps direct the scenes because I'm trying to stay within that framework of vibes for the reader. So I try not to write just the story alone, but also the tone of the work. Also having a theme in mind, or a motif that runs throughout, can really make a work powerful

The POV has a voice-

This depends on the style of the writer, but for my work, it's HUGE. If I'm writing from the POV of one character and it is identical to the POV of another character, I am not doing a good job. through the way things are described, the tone, whether the writing is more formal vs casual, all of this can help establish the voice of the fic. the fics that I've written that are the most stand out, or the most entertaining, or the most popular - all of them have a very distinct character voice to them that matches the story and the tone of the fic, and helps characterize the pov. it's not for everyone, but to me this is the single most important thing to elevate a story into something special

Writer's block-

Getting stuck is inevitable. When you're stuck, you have two options: grind it out or let it simmer. Grinding through the block is not for the faint of heart - by this I mean literally chain yourself to the laptop and poke out word after painful word until the words start to flow. This could take hours and hours and barely result in a paragraph.... that you might scrap later. But, sometimes it can be enough to break through the block. If you let it simmer, that's more gentle - take a shower, go to the grocery store, go on a walk, etc. If that's not enough, read, watch tv, consume some other kind of media that fills your cup. Let your brain work out the block in your background processes. return to the fic when you really want to and then you will be ready.

Two things I always think of when I don't know what comes next in a story: What would I as a reader be so insanely stoked to see happen next??? and What would be unexpected or exciting here?

On community:

You can't really talk about the transformative work of writing fanfiction without mentioning the fandom as community. I have a lot of precious thoughts about this, but I will keep things brief here. Fic is shared in a dialogue with other fans - it is not sold, it is not beholden to canon, it is not for the satisfaction of the original work. People are writing purely because they want to and that is an amazing and powerful thing !!!!!

Comments -

Well we all want comments because we love to hear about how people love our take on our precious blorbos. But you have to leave comments on other folks work too. truly, as a writer, you have to. I think this is a good way to start finding your people: read fic that excites you -> leave a comment there -> see who else left comments -> read their fics -> look at their bookmarks -> read more fics -> leave more comments -> you will start to 'know' the people who like the same thing as you. you will start to have readers! you will find writers that inspire you! you will get better at writing! you will be in fandom!

One important thing to note for new to fanfic folks is that construct criticism of any kind is not welcome on fanfiction. it's not needed because the author is SHARING fic with you - I am by no means the first person to say this, but think of it like going to their house and eating their home cooked meal... if it's not to your taste, peace out. just leave. no need to let them know. this is doubly true if you don't like the content of a fic. simply leave...it's not for you, so find something that is. or make your own thing. As a writer, if someone is not following this basic fandom decorum, and they hurt your feelings with a nasty comment, you need to remember that they are the one in the wrong - they are being rude and you are justified to feel irritated or hurt. if you've tagged your own work appropriately, then you haven't done anything wrong by writing your fic.

Social media-

Two things about writing and social media (fandom circles of socials). 1. be insane about one particular thing, that will be your brand and bring you people and be fun. you don't have to do this, you could just be insane about a lot of things, but I think having one niche interest that really gets you going is good. that's my opinion! 2. never publicly discredit your work. don't say "LOL I suck at summaries" in the summary of the fic. don't put yourself down even if you have doubts about your writing....you can improve without doing that!!!

Sharing your fics in a post on twitter or bluesky is a good way to get more people to click on them, esp if you are a new writer. sometimes you will see people make pretty little title cards - they are making these on canva dot com and it is easy and free to use. I love doing this and it took me awhile to figure out how my favorite writers were making such pretty title cards for their fics. so now you know!

On concluding:

I can't imagine the resiliency of the readers who made it to this point!!!!!!!!! WOW !! Obviously I will post this with the caveat that I am just one little girlie and there are a lot of fic writing folks out there, some of them much more well spoken and more knowledgeable and better writers than me, and maybe if they posted a similar essay, it would have completely different content. that is okay and I am not sad about it. in other words, I do not pretend to be an authority on any of this, I am just a person who loves writing fanfiction and this is what I would tell a complete beginner <3 thank you for reading <3

[storiesofsvu]

WIP Roundup!

Alright, I've completely cleaned out the inbox and deleted "all" messages that I didn't respond to/that were "ghost" messages driving me insane saying they were there when they weren't.

Which ALSO means I've gone through my entire WIP folder and narrowed things down. Some got deleted, some I'm going to sit on for a little bit and see if something sparks, others I went through and added nearly 3000 words of blurbs/notes/ideas on how the fic is gonna go. The creativity is *flowing* so here's what we're working with now!

Addison Montgomery: A twist on the Seattle Grace prom ep. This time it's Addi off in an on call room cheating. She knows she shouldn't, that it's wrong and tells reader this, who agrees with a laugh. Problem is Addi knows it's not gonna be the last time. Amanda Rollins: her girl is supposed to be her gambling good luck charm. Amanda's not very happy when she ends up being someone else's and takes her home to be punished. Barhoun: 1 angst piece delving into one version of how/why they break up for good. Why things would never workout between them. 1 poly!fic where they frequent a high end sex club in the city and see a little timid thing that needs *guidance* (will end up w multiple parts) 1 poly! pure smut fic where they've both had long weeks and need someone to take it out on. Alex Blake: a minor hurt major comfort piece. Reader is hosting the team for post case drinks, but the case hit hard and she gets incredibly overwhelmed with the environment in her apartment. Blake is the one she trusts and wants around. Sonny Carisi: 1 hurt/comfort of him having to deal w his cop wife being undercover. He's now the ada and can't be on scene to help her/protect her and man does he ever hate that. 1 hurt/comfort potentially related to s26. Sonny needs someone, he needs to be comforted and taken care of by someone he trusts completely, someone he can relinquish all control to. CM Ladies: 1 comfort of reader coming out as bi/coming to terms with it and feeling a little bit insecure about it because she's only dated/been with men. Reassurance from the rest of the girls 1 mega smut club sandwich: Reader is friends with JJ, she's casually dated a couple other members of the team over the years and everything is on good terms. When she gets invited out for a night of drinks she meets the newest team member and is conflicted about how her night will end. Naturally, one of the girls comes up with a much spicier idea. One that reader doesn't need to make a choice. Elizabeth Donnelly: 1 mini series where Liz's relatively new gf starts to see the way other prosecutors act around her gf, how often Liz drops things to attend to their needs and how much she mentors them. She starts to get jealous/insecure about it and their relationship, wondering if she's enough or if Liz deserves/wants more. Emily Prentiss: 1 hurt/comfort in s17. Instead of getting high, emily devolves even more as she starts to spin out. It's only when reader shows up to yank her out of it that she finally gets a reality check from someone who cares and is worried about her. 1 smut. a continuation of "Seventeen" if you will, where em has tried to be good and play by the rules but she can't help it. Work's been busy and she's *needy* Olivia Benson: 1 mommy!olivia smut 1 that's a 5 times + 1 style of Olivia secretly dating Elliot's younger sister. Sara Kingsley: 1 either multi part-er or a 5 times where Sara has a crush but doesn't want to admit it. Joe Velasco: a 5 times one i've been working on for ages. Where he and reader have been sleeping together for a while but are in denial of all feelings and pretending their fling is a secret when.. yeah... everybody knows.

There's 20 all together in my WIP folder, but some I am sitting on to see if they develop something that might be deleted so I didn't include them.

That gives you a nice idea of what style/who is in the wip folder and what y'all have to look forward to!

Requests remain OPEN, so feel free to check out my pinned post and prompt lists to get some ideas. I generally DO like to get more than just the prompt as a request, send me even just a pretty vague setting/thought/what kind of situation they're in/how they got there. It helps me come up with someone more and there's a higher chance of it not getting deleted further down the road lol.

Happy Wednesday! <3

[immedealwithit9855]

How Would the Guys Handle/React to LoveStruck Groupies......🤭😂

I imagine I'm hitting a home run when I say that each of these guys have made us wet just looking at them. Those thighs. Those arms. Those crotches. (WIPE YA MOUTH)! Let's say they're in a day and age where people know of them, accepting them wholeheartedly, but still respecting their standards. What happens when they get an influx of horny women knocking at their door!?

Man, I don't care. I couldn't help but add this, imagining the guys being chased by crazy women in the sewers. (Maybe Mikey or Donnie).

LEONARDO

Fearless Stud has enough issues dealing with both Raph and Mikey

But GROUPIES??????

In fact, the guy isn't the type to want a harem!

Not really his style, nor something hes used to

It was a challenging mission to save a group of women from being shipped off to foreign countries

He was expecting them to scream in his face and run for the hills

He did not expect them to start trippin' over him

It started off innocent, sort of

Girls would come to visit, have tea time, watch him train/spar, even joining him in meditation

One going a little too far leaving her underwear in his bed

For a time, he enjoyed the appreciation and attention. (Something his brothers lack sometimes)

Then things went from subtle admiration to downright weird

Girls raiding his drawers, touching his bonsai trees, wearing his clothes, sleeping in his bed🤦🏾‍♀️

His brothers were getting a laugh out of their leader's growing aggravation with these women's infatuations

When one of the girls swiped his bandages, that was the last straw

He had a nice firm talk with them, telling them he appreciates their admiration of him but had to end it

Continuing how its his job to protect as people from harm

It toned down a bit, so much so that it seems like they've given up

Then he realizes his good pants were missing

RAPHAEL

Macho Man would be annoyed but start to like it

Girls like a man with thick biceps and an attitude to match

He saved a few girls from being mugged

Beat the living daylights outta the guys

When the job was done, the girls began drooling over him

He found their behavior weird because girls don't find creatures like him 'attractive'

They did (And of course, HE IS)

He would use them as extra weight during workouts

Chicks are practically creaming over his grunts and throbbing muscles

Churring as they massage him, feeding him fruit like a pharaoh (His brothers sure ain't gonna do it)!

The girls were just as amazed at his knitting projects

He was enjoying it too much, jogging around the sewers with women in his arms, one on his shell!

When the girls would see him coming up from the manhole, they'd throw their thongs at him from their balcony, to which he shoved into his pocket

Much to the disgust of Leo and Donnie, Mikey pat him on the shell

"You're gonna give those back, right?"

Things started getting outta hand when the girls start taking his yarn and randomly flashing him

What really tore it for him is when one of them dissed Mikey

I don't care who you are, it's been made perfectly clear that NOBODY MESSES WITH MIKEY!!!

He didn't want to be a monster, but that made him one

"THATS IT!!!! I HAD IT UP TA HERE!!! EVERYBODY OUT! GET OUT, YA SKEEZAS!!!!"

Frightened with some heartache in the mix, the girls left, ending the constant fangirling entourage

"Bros before those man!"

Him and Mikey fist bumped

DONATELLO

I feel like he would be the overwhelmed nerd in this type of situation

Hes used to one female, not many

He took down some thugs about to kidnap some college girls

He got the job done, but did not anticipate the consequences of his triumph

The girls admired him right away, loving his toned body and weapon of choice

He didnt pay it any mind until one of the girls wanted to repay him

He said it wasnt necessary, yet the ladies insisted

Which is how he ended up with 4 lab assists

It was cool to start

Cleaning his work areas, organizing documents, cooking his meals, even giving him massages while he worked

Then it got awkward when the ladies start catching the feels for him, deciding to compete for his affections

He treated them all the same, then one day it got outta hand

He was working when he heard commotion coming from the living area

The guys come upon the girls cat fighting over Donnie's tactical boots

When they ruined them, Leo had to step in

Telling the girls to cease their behavior and leave

Refusing to leave to see if thats what Donnie wanted

He panicked, sinking into his shell

The ladies thought that was answer enough, ending it there

MICHAELANGELO

I think Mikey would enjoy it for good period of time, but even he has his limits (sort of)

He saved a few girls from a gunman

Earning hugs and kisses

He was surprised by the affection but went with it

Next thing he knows, him and his brothers go on patrol to find them hanging out of their balcony

Hooting and cooing, dancing lewdly for him as motivation

The guys shook their heads

Mikey making it worse blowing kisses at them, causing them to squeal and faint

This goes on for months, he even went to second base with 2 of them

One night they return to the lair and what they find shocks them

The ladies dressed in orange lingerie, each one more lewd than the last

Mikey's boner started showing, chasing the girls into his room

Leo, Donnie, and Raph all agreed that this had to stop, they had jobs to do

Having an intervention with Mikey was like talking to a brick wall

When it ended, he continued his entourage

Then the girls got crazy and started chasing him and his brothers throughout the sewers, shouting nonsense and drama

"I Wanna Have Your Baby, Mikey!

"You know you want this!"

Splinter has had it, informing Mikey to end it or HE WILL

In a way he did something

Telling the girls enough is enough, that he's had enough attention to last him a lifetime

The girls sigh, disappointed

But before leaving, Mikey secretly tells them to come around during his mating season only🤭😂🤯

[ask-postcrash-curly]

[Hello again, everyone! Kind Words speaking! Nice to finally come out of hiding!

Words really can't begin to express how much I feel for this silly little video game blog and everybody involved in this experience. Yes - it has been an experience, wholeheartedly. And despite my position being, well, me, I even extend my gratitude to those of you who were relentlessly mean, LMAO. (Looking at you, screaming anon! I forgive you. /silly) After all, it's the subpar stuff that makes the good stuff... well, good, right? It really feels like we've developed our own special little microcommunity here, even if we aren't always talking directly to one another. I know I'm not the only one who kept tabs on all the other "regulars" who came around!

And speaking of keeping tabs on regulars... I am sincerely floored by all of the attention my own persona has garnered. As someone with a dead blog, who has never had any kind of internet following whatsoever, the amount of love and adoration that came from you all for Robin (aka Kind Words) was nearly overwhelming at times. My characters mean everything to me - so to know there was even just a handful of other people who loved her and her blossoming relationship with Curly - I can't begin to express my gratitude for it. I'll always cherish any of the sweet acknowledgements, messages, and art thrown our way from Mod, Curly, and you guys.

When I first starting getting more emotionally invested here, one of my friends actually warned me well not to let it "get to my head." I assuredly had no intention of such a thing - but I'm glad it did anyway! It's funny how something so small with no real intention of going anywhere can turn into a thing that takes up an unprecedented amount of your life! I'm sure Mod felt the same way when starting this blog, too.

I hadn't quite finished getting all of my thoughts out by the time Judgement came, but that will have to suffice for now - you all know how much I can yap and yap if you'll let me! Thank you again, to everyone, so much. We'll meet again in Oz, sweet pea. ♡]

[HELLO!

awghhhh your writing’s been such a devastating pleasure to read,,, i love robin warbler

and YEAH i was NOT expecting to spend this much time on this lmao

please do yap and yap <3]

[have-you-seen-my-sanity]

Never ever again

Moon boys x gn!reader

Marc and Jake got into shit once again and Steven had to experience what it felt like when they got drunk.

*C'mon buddy, stick it inside already. Can't be that hard!*

Steven stopped.

"Bruv, that sounded so dirty coming from you."

*Get the key into the lock...* Marc repeated, this time slower and more thoughtful.

Steven tried to unlock the door again, but everytime he had a perfect angle and pushed, the key slipped.

"Bloody- I can't believe I'm too drunk to unlock that stupid door."

*Dude, try it nice and easy, Stevo. Nice and easy.* Jake chimed in, his words came out a bit slurred.

Steven tried again and finally it worked!

He hoped you'd be asleep by now, he was already embarrassed enough by being the one fronting when they're drunk. Steven stepped inside, not knowing you were very well awake.

You were in the bathroom, getting ready for bed. As you left, Steven nearly got a heart attack seeing you walking out because he didn't realize the light was on.

"Oh fuck–" he jumped.

The sudden appearance of Steven made you suck in a breath and make an ungodly sound. "Shit! Holy fuck, Steven."

"Hiya." he made an apologetic smile. "Y're still awake?"

You let out a breath to calm down, smelling something strong coming from him. "Yeah. And you smell like you fell into alcohol." you pointed out, taking a sniff and making a face.

Steven sniffed on his arm, smelling the alcohol Marc and Jake consumed on their mission.

"It wasn't me, Marc and Jake are responsible."

You crossed your arms. "Oh. Typical. I know you could never chunk down gallons of alcohol like they can. You're a good boy." you smiled. "But seriously, you should sleep."

Steven couldn't help but smile proudly at how you called him a good boy. "Oh, I'm what now?" he somehow wanted to hear it again.

"You're drunk."

"Oh.." his face fell a bit, but he grinned lazily as he started walking past you, wanting to clean himself in the bathroom.

When Steven walked past you, your senses were overwhelmed by the smell of alcohol, causing you to cough out. "Oh god- oh my.." another cough came out and you immediately made your way to the nearest window to open it wide. You stood there, poking your head out to get as much fresh air as possible.

Steven soon came out of the bathroom, having stripped off his clothes and only wearing boxers now. "My head feels like I've been hit by a bloody train."

"What have you done in Cairo when Marc had his quality time with the scotch?" you asked, turning around to face him.

"Nothin', he was out the whole time, he just slept it off and took a pain killer the next day."

You nodded. "Alright first-time-drunk Steven, you should sleep."

Steven flopped down on the bed, holding his head. "Fuck my head's spinnin' I don't think I'll be able to sleep."

"Want me to get a bucket...just in case?"

Steven nodded. "That would be lovely, thanks."

You went to the bathroom, grabbing a washcloth and made it wet, then returned with the bucket and the cloth, putting it on his forehead. "Here, that should help you get sober quicker."

"You're the best." Steven smiled contendly.

You sat down on the edge of the bed. "Care to tell me what the fuck happened?"

Steven nodded. "Well, Marc was after this druglord or whatever," he flipped the cloth on his head to the colder side. "That guy invited him for a round of alcohol, Marc had to do it for cover. In the end Jake took over and killed everybody inside the room."

"Jake managed to kill people while being drunk?"

"Yeh."

"Alright Steven, you should get some sleep." you patted his shoulder.

Steven nodded, closing his eyes for a few seconds before he opened them again. "Oh shit, I think I'm going to–" he quickly sat up, getting out of the bed to make his way to the bathroom.

Making your way over, you gently knocked on the door. "You okay in there?"

Judging from the sounds you heard coming from the bathroom, Steven was not okay.

"Don't come in here unless you want to know what an atomic bomb smells like, luv."

As bad as you felt for Steven and as bad as you wanted to whoop Marc's and Jake's asses for putting Steven through this hell, you had to suppress a laughter threatening to come out of you at Steven's comment.

But a snort came out of you, and you wanted to punch yourself for it. "Sorry." you covered your mouth, trying not to laugh.

Steven went quiet inside the bathroom, you heard the toilet getting flushed. You turned to walk back to the bed.

"Oi!"

You stopped in your tracks.

"I swear I'll never drink again. Ever."

You snorted. "Tell that Marc and Jake."

Steven came out of the bathroom. "I'll never understand how they can drink such stuff. The hardest stuff I've ever drank was Wine."

He flopped down on the bed again, putting the cloth back on his head. "I feel like I'm close to dying."

You headed for the kitchen, grabbing some crackers, a bottle of water and something salty. "Then Marc and Jake have to be alcohol-immune zombies or something." you joked, setting the things on the bedside table. "Eat those, it'll help with your hangover tomorrow."

"Nah, I can't think of eating anything now. Just let me lay here and let nature reclaim me, would ya?" It was Marc now.

"Then tea?" you suggested.

Marc looked at you, making a face. "Ugh.." he scoffed. "Steven can have the tea."

"Coffee? Black no sugar, your usual?"

Marc removed the cloth from his head. "Yeah but no. I'll make it once I wake up." he mumbled, pulling up the covers.

"Hey where is Jake?" you asked.

Marc closed his eyes. "Jake's out cold."

You decided to let them rest, wanting to prepare the coffee. "I'll go make the coffee."

"Nuh-uh."

Looking back, you saw Marc still with his eyes closed, pointing a finger at you.

"What?"

"Don't you dare move a muscle." he mumbled.

"Huh?"

"Yeah you heard me. C'mere, plant ya ass down on this bed and sleep."

Marc can be a goofball when he's drunk and he knows it.

"But–"

"Ah-ah." he opened one eye, then the other, smiling at you. "Please?"

"Can't sleep alone? You?" you chuckled.

He shook his head, pouting at you.

You surrendered "Fine. But only until you fall asleep." you smiled.

He nodded, smiling.

You laid down next to him. Marc pulled you into his side, shifting into a comfortable position.

Marc fell asleep almost instantly, you followed shortly after.

Couple hours later, you stirred awake, feeling the bed empty. Sitting up, you spotted him sitting on the couch, eating the stuff you brought earlier for Steven.

"Getting sudden hunger attacks?" you rubbed your eyes.

"Yeah. I guess early hangover's kickin'." Steven was back.

You got up, making your way to Steven and sat down next to him. "How do you feel?"

"Much better." he smiled.

You smiled back. "You better stick to tea. It's better anyway."

"Yeah I will. Tea tastes much better anyway." He grinned.

You couldn't agree more.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

heyy I have a question but I'm kinda embarrassed about it so idk?

how much of a high libido is normal for a teenager? around 15 years? because like I've been taught that puberty makes you horny, but all everyone was always talking and making jokes about was cus males going through that, and I'm not a cis dude

I was just wondering because like it feels wrong sometimes to think about it that much even though it feels good to but like -I also don't really know how to say this- it also feels like I'm using sexual thoughts and fantasies and stuff to distract myself and to repress the stuff going on in my life? like I can feel my brain switch from "I'm gonna have a breakdown" to "how about horny?" in a couple of seconds and idk if that's normal? or healthy for that matter lol

idk what to say have a nice day and any advice is appreciated<3

(do you do named anons? if so, can I be fox anon?)

hi fox anon,

I'm actually going to direct you to an ask from a shrimp anon, where we had a little chat about hypersexuality and how to know if your sex drive is too high. (spoiler alert: if you're not actively ruining your own life in the pursuit of sex, it's probably not!)

there are definitely the most stereotypes about cis teenage boys being horny, but it's very normal for people with any gender identity, genitalia, and hormones to be extremely interested in sex during their teen years. (and of course, it's also normal not to be interested at all!) this is the part of your life where everybody's bodies are reaching sexual maturity, and it's extremely EXTREMELY normal to have a burning curiosity to go along with that.

it's also very normal to have a lot of Large emotions and feel like they can switch on a dime; that's the power of Hormones, babey! you're experiencing a lot of internal hormonal situations and external social stresses for the first time, and your brain is learning how to process all that.

I have a friend who's only a few months old, so when he gets overwhelmed he doesn't know how to handle that and usually just cries about it because he's brand new and doesn't have any other coping mechanisms. of course, you have a lot more experience than a guy who's brand new and you know way more coping mechanisms than he does, but you're in a somewhat similar position of having to handle a LOT of new shit and not knowing how to cope with it yet. sometimes what's going to happen is just pivoting hard from one big feeling to another - in some cases, from the pits of despair straight to horny jail.

is it possible to become overly reliant on sexual stimulation as a form of self-soothing? sure, of course. it's possible to become overly reliant on anything; absolutely any positive behavior can become detrimental if it's performed to extremity. again, read that ask I linked!

but pivoting from a breakdown to jacking off isn't a bad idea. it can help you calm down, can be a great transition into a nap or sleep, and pops off a little burst of dopamine and oxytocin that's probably very badly needed if you're on the verge of a breakdown. of course it's ideal to have other healthy outlets for when you're feeling bad - making art or doing something else with your hands, doing some enjoyable physical activity, talking with friends or family, keeping a journal - but as one part of a larger diet of support and coping mechanism, horny behavior is great, normal, and very healthy.

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Birthday NAU

So my 19th birthday was some time ago, the 20th of April to be exact.

I'm going to get myself a nice gift - I'm going to make a voiceover for some of my Necro AU characters and use ElevenLabs to make voices for them to read it out. I got myself a pro subscription for some of the money I got from family. All the text will be - obviously - original and the voice will be generated based on some retro games like Dark Omen, Myth and Warlords Battlecry.

Of course, I will write and publish them, alongside the audio, for anybody that still thinks NAU is interesting. But I'll just have some fun and honor the characters I made this blog for in the first place.

Yeah, it's sad that Mortuarius is so short and that I'm unhappy with the quality, meaning I'll likely either remake it and start from scratch or just put it to rest. I'm far too much of a perfectionist to actually feel what I've done up to now is enough to warrant any sort of even light interest, leading to a hopeless spiral of self critique and an overwhelming feeling of pointlessness. The crushing majority of ideas will be forever left to gather dust in my mind.

I can't draw, so I will likely never get to show you guys how I wanted them to appear. I can't animate, I can't render either - no videos will ever be made of them in action. All I have to introduce them into the world is my writing which is incredibly flawed, further proven by the narrative and worldbuilding mistakes made in Mortuarius, botched to a point where I cannot get myself to write anymore because as soon as I realised how limited the story of Denki is, when chosen to be approached from his initial training rather than much later on when he can actually do stuff and interact with Teyvat rather than just Umbra, I lost all momentum I had going.

Don't think I have it all planned either. Each new content drop for Genshin takes a hammer to my ideas and creates massive plotholes that I have to somehow explain. Or, at least, I feel I need the answers to. I am notoriously too demanding of myself, but I just can't help it. Unless NAU and its characters are Genshin-level in terms of content, there's no hope for them both. You may think that - hey, Genshin's lore is actually very mid and is also flawed while their characters of ten fall extremely short of their potential, come out as two-dimensional or like slightly different version of identical tropes. Like just look at Yoimiya and Mualani as an example. Or Kokomi and Jean. Or Zhongli and Neuvilette. Or Beidou and Dehya. They have different looks and lore, but their personalities are very close to each other - for me adding a band-aid in the form of limited time events is not a valid solution.

But Genshin remedies it with character design. Some fanservice, some bait, a lot of rule-of-cool type stuff and gameplay options. I cannot do any of this. NAU characters are not hot anime girls/guys that you can build and watch in-game. They won't ever measure up.

And so it goes, this train of thought, from one excuse and self-hating line to the other, wasting time, wasting effort, wasting opportunity. Even though I didn't post anything for NAU in months, I am fairly burnt out with it due to all this self-influcted pressure and the constant desire to "fix it" or "make it appealing". It was supposed to be fun, but it didn't end up this way.

So I'm doing these voicelines because I know I will have fun with them, and I will feel really happy and just a little bit proud of hearing them come to life in this homeopathical and fake way. "The people" won't care, but its okay. I'm doing this one for myself.

Thank you for everybody that reached this point of my stream of conciousness. Have a nice day.