#IF ANYONE ACTUALLY READS THIS OR JUST CHECKS OUT THEIR TH.. U HAVE TO TELL ME UR FAVS... LIKE EVEN IF U READ JUST ABOUT ONE UNIT/GROUP..
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Bursting into the room: Please tell me about your idol OCs!! What music do they do? What fashion styles? Who are your favorites? Do they have any fun interactions? Do you have more art of them?
auauauAAUUGHHHH đđđđđ THANK YOU FOR THISSS

AHSJKDHASD idk how to talk about them !! in a normal way !! so ahhhh let me just try giving basic info about each group or smth
edit: this is so fucking LONG LMAOOO.... here is a link to all their TH (andromeda isn't done sorry), if u wish to skip my mad man blabbing altogether B)
Andromeda
my first idol ocs group, naturally was a llsif fan group love them with my entire heart despite the fact that i make content with them like once ten years, they live in my head all the damn time there are 9 of them, canonically they are the only ones who have the privilege of being "very fucking popular and successful" went from being school idols (SparkleS) with pretty typical cute/energetic concept, then debuted fr (Andromeda) and now their concept is more mature/elegant/cool
uhhh they are just wonderful girls who are all best friends and they are very cute and different and silleyyyyy and i am a horrible father bc i didn't make their TH profiles yet (THERE IS 9 OF THEM IT'S SO HARD) so here is their tag instead... ignore very old art tho đ also i have spotify playlist with songs i imagine they either would have or would cover - here
(also in my mind their concept/main vibe of their music kind of ever-changing, to me, they can do whatever they want at this point bc they are just so popular lol + they have units and such and i can get away with it) (they are overpowered yes yes)
Ishin-Denshin
5 members here,, they are my girl boy group or boy girl group <3 don't know how to explain it's just they are bg but the music inspo/concept is strictly what my fav girl groups i listen to got going on
total boys next door, just chill sweet guys, good vibes only fun fact all got like trauma/issues (tm) because i am certified sad boys maker, but they are all doing well and go to therapy LMAO
like Andromeda they all met in high school and started idol club together, but unlike the girlies they didn't mean to be proper idols, sorta got scouted later on anyways they are also besties, very tight-knit (trauma bonded?) and i also love them dearly they got their TH profiles, with bits of main lore and some info on their friendships - here their spotify playlist - eek
GRIMM parade
ah my funny crazy little theatre kids and vocaloid stans literally a combo of 3 quirky bitches who really love acting and dark dramatic stories
i think the most basic way to describe their vibes would be like Halloween + fairy tales? They are very extra and have like odd ways of speaking/interacting with people, but it's their charm (as per usual, very much full of brain issues, bc i gotta make my boys even a little sad)
their TH - here their spotify - here (way less songs bc it's stupidly hard to find smth i like for them)
cheer4U
literally fresh out of the oven i have nothing for themm asjkdhakdsda i gotta share tho: they are a co-ed group, and from what i have seen in life most groups give rap parts to men, but here it's boys being vocalists and girls being rappers(+vocalists), and idk how to explain but it is very fun to me, girls got all the swaggg
also a fun fact: one dude (michi) is hisoka's (andromeda) younger brother and one girlie (olly) is elijah's (pothos) younger sister
pothos
now that i mentioned them, even tho this is just about my idols i have to talk about everybody even a little pothos is a dance crew, so they are 4 dudes who make choreographies and despite my pattern of making best friends, these 4 are NOT asdjkhakjdhaskl, more like itâs 3 dudes who are friends with elijah but aren't close amongst each other
their TH - here
anison singers
just these two random soloists, with their own quirks they are dating LOL their TH - here
Urban Legends
my rock band heheeee they are just cool and awesome girlies, who make music about scary myths and folk stories their TH - here
__
re: fashion styles it either matches their concept, or if we are talking individually - it depends on each ocs LMAO re: my favorites andromeda are the blueprint, so they receive special treatment, but currently i am also crazy about Ishin-Denshin AND dince cheer4U are newborns i am focusing on establishing their personalities lol
re: do they have any fun interactions?
ok so idol groups all know each other for sure, pothos prolly interacted with them as well, but way less and more formal, soloists and urband legends def had only minor interactions IF they had those.
generally speaking, everyone in the company treat Andromeda like seniors/girlbosses (because they are) while cheer4U are now the youngest and newest group they are kinda babies to everyone Andromeda doesn't have very close relations to anyone (being popular doesn't help here), but they are considered like a proper sister group to Ishin-Denshin, due to some matching concept elements and being the 'foundation' of the company Andromeda and Ishin-Denshin def had their little collabs, specifically vocal-based, since both group got mad vocalists also important to point out that Ishin-Denshin are huge fans of Andromeda, like every single one of them loves them, they def have been following Andromeda since their school idol days and they are still not over the fact that they ended up in the same company
Ishin-Denshin and GRIMM parade are a bit closer, i think because they are the same age, and because Ryunosuke insisted they should be rivals LOL it didn't happen tho, because Ishin-Denshin are just sweeties, and were like "no thank you <3", so Ryunosuke settled on Ishin-Denshin being their supporters or smth anyways, they def hang out somewhat regularly, ofc each of GRIMM parade members is close to different Ishin-Denshin members i think main proper friendships i have are: Ryunosuke and Tadao (leaders and basically dads of their group... lowkey considering making them a couple ahaha...) Shouhei and Nobu+Kyo, Shouhei and Nobu are just besties who hang out a bunch, but two of them with Kyo had like a whole event of helping Shouhei deal with a nasty break up he had (Nobu had a shitty relationship too, while Kyo.. well... it's in his TH profile B) the point is Kyo and Nobu just helped Shouhei process things) Rokuro and Kyo - just hype boys who hype together
here is a fun meme you should laugh it's very funny (i have no one to share this with)

i don't think i have any other ~full group~ relations so here's random canon connections i remember tsubaki (urban legends) is a fangirl of andromeda and specifically their triplers unit, def stans hana, mieko and shiori ryunosuke (grimm parade) and kaede (urban legends) totally get along due to their 'dramatic freak' agenda, witnessing them talking to each other has to be an Experience, because they 100% use most extra phrases and words LMAO elijah (pothos) is a huge fanboy of grimm parade and ryunosuke specifically kyo (ishindenshin), rokuro (grimm parade) and elijah (pothos) are also like 3 energetic funky boys who love dancing kyo, tadao (ishindenshin), axe, elijah (pothos), michi (cheer4U), hana (andromeda) and shinobu (urban legends) all love working out so i imagine they end up together in the gym every now and then also totally exlusive info, but im gonna couple up ichigo (cheer4U) and kyo (ishindenshin), as well as michi (cheer4U) and shouhei (grimm parade) B)
FUNNY THING... THIS IS LIKE NO INFORMATION AT ALL AHAHA.. TIP OF THE ICEBERG... I HAVE SO SO SO MUCH ABOUT EVERY SINGLE INDIVIDUAL OC, LIKE THE STUFF THAT I DIDN'T HAVE SPACE/DESIRE TO WRITE ABOUT IN THEIR TH PROFILES... AUGH
#ask adry#anonymous#HTANK YOU FOR LETTING ME BLAB ABOUT THEM EVEN A LITTLE (BECAUSE THIS IS HONESTLY NOTHING)#IF ANYONE ACTUALLY READS THIS OR JUST CHECKS OUT THEIR TH.. U HAVE TO TELL ME UR FAVS... LIKE EVEN IF U READ JUST ABOUT ONE UNIT/GROUP..#I AM DESPERATE <3#..#disclaimer: I AM NOT WRITER AND I CANNOT WRITE DO NOT EXPECT DECENT AND COMPREHENSIBLE TEXT FROM ME EVER <3
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As the Seasons Pass Ch. 1 "Mid-July" â A sapphic fiction story
Synopsis: Genie has been struggling with a homoerotic friendship. She meets a girl named Valerie through this friend. Tonight is the first time she's hanging out with Valerie one-on-one. Platonically of course. This story is gonna be a very slow burn, so this chapter surrounds the first stage of building the dynamic that Genie and Valerie will have. This is part one, but there is a background chapter that surrounds the homoerotic relationship Genie has. If you'd like to check that out, it's linked in my pinned post.
Contains: Nervous Genie. Car ride. General sapphic nervousness and awkwardness. Concert. Slice of life. Indirect kisses:p
Warnings: Although there isn't smut in this chapter, this story as a whole is not for minors. If you're not 18+ you are not welcome here, I mean this in the nicest way.
Word count: 1.6K
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I wake up to another instagram notification, a DM from Valerie.
@/Valthehuman: Wait would you want to hang out? Like before the next group hangout? There's a show tomorrow night at that bar you were asking about, if ur free/interested in going. I have an extra ticket too?
@/Geniesirius: Yeah omg, that sounds so fun, just let me know what time! :)
There's a bubbly, fluttery feeling rising in my chest that actually makes me excited to get out of bed. I head out to the kitchen and make breakfast.
My phone lights up and I pick up my phone with a record amount of speed. It's not Val. It's one of the scam texts about the election. I roll my eyes and put my phone down.
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I'm in the middle of drawing a cute little neurographic-style page when my phone lights up again. This time it's her.
@/Valthehuman: Awesome! It starts at 7:30, do u wanna meet there or I can pick you up? Itâs kind of a hard place to find unless you know what youâre looking for.
@/Geniesirius: Yeah that would be so nice actually, i hate driving into downtown :)) I'll send my address over in a sec!
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I'm really anxious getting ready. Val's so cool and effortless. I've gone through three different outfits, I probably should have asked about the vibe.
I grip my phone and start scouring Val's page in an attempt to find the band that's playing tonight. I click on her tagged photos and scroll a bit, revealing a picture of a crowd with Val front line and center. Her eyes were wide and she had the biggest smile I've ever seen on anyone's face.
The caption reads: "So lucky to have had some of my closest friends at my first show." Posted by @/jennadummy.
After going through her feed, I see she's the drummer of this band. I watch a few of the reels and it seems to be a pretty eclectic alternative band. This is good. Everyone at the shows dress pretty casual and the crowds run pretty small.
I settle on some black cargo pants and a lavender babytee. I accessorize with some silver jewelry and spritz some peach perfume on my neck and wrists. She's picking me up in an hour and I feel a ball of anxiety building in the pit of my stomach.
I keep telling myself it's not a big deal, because it's not. I'm just hanging out with a new person and making a friend. It's not like im going on a tinder date with a stranger or something. It's literally not even a thing it's just a stupid little hangout in a public place. Oh and a forty-five minute drive with someone that's had maybe six minutes of screentime in my life so far. Fuuuuuck fuck fuck fuck fuck what are we even gonna talk about for forty-five minutes?
I pick my phone up again and start stalking her socials again, I have to find at least one thing I can resort to if things feel too quiet and weird. She has the link to her spotify in her bio, truly a godsend. She only has one playlist titled 'everything' and it's over two thousand hours long. I scroll through and see we have a ton of bands and artists in common, I click through and sample the songs and artists I don't know. All niche, obscure bands that have under a thousand monthly listeners.
In the middle of my venture, a random number texts me.
234-555-6789: Hey it's Valerie, I was wondering if you wanted to pick up some food or snacks or something to eat on the way? If so, I'll probably be on my way now, if that's okay?
I forgot we exchanged numbers earlier, my heart almost jumped out of my chest when I saw it was her. The stress I'm feeling is borderline ridiculous, but no matter how hard I try to overcome it, I can't help but turn into a puddle of nerves before I hang out with literally anyone, even (correction: especially) Sabrina.
Me: Yeah, that sounds awesome actually. I'm ready to go too so just lmk when ur on the way:))
She leaves a heart on the message and lets me know she'll be here in ten minutes.
It feels like a mass of knots are winding and tightening in the pit of my stomach. My hands are shaky and my breath is shorter than it usually is when I get nervous before going out.
I head outside two minutes before her ETA so she won't have to wait on me. She pulls up and her car is insane. It looks brand new, and it's a dark blue color.
I walk around to the passenger and open the door.
"Heeeeey, You look good." The smile on her face is major and she reaches over for me and pulls me into a tight hug.
"Hey, thanks for inviting me, it's good to see you again. You look really good too." I find that last part couldn't help but come out fast paced and slightly jumbled. She's wearing an olive green oversized button up, which is of course, unbuttoned. Underneath is a white tank top and her pants are dark and baggy. Her hair is shaggy and reflects the light, complimenting its natural black color with an orange and yellow shine. Her eyes are decorated with smudged black eyeliner, and her lip tint is a neutral brown color. If her appearance could be summed up in one word, it would be 'androgynous.'
She drives with one hand and sings under her breath so softly you'd never know she was doing it unless you paid attention. Which I'm totally not, by the way.
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"My passenger door is kinda fucked up right now, so I gotta open it from outside."
She turns the wheel so smoothly, and she purses her lips as she parks. When she stops the car she develops a wide smile.
"Parked right on the first try swag"
I feel my face scrunch as I laugh through my nose. "should we call bella hadid?"
Mutual laughter erupts and she opens the driver door and steps out of the car. She speed walks over to my side and pulls the handle with a slight urgency. She walks a little quicker than me, opening the door to the gas station before I can reach it. As I walk past her, I am greeted with a lightly cologned smell. It's very woody with some light notes of vanilla.
"Thanks. You're so chivalrous."
"You gotta be while courting."
I turn my head towards her and we make eye contact. She starts shaking her head quickly. Her eyebrows lifted, her eyes squinted, Her lips upturned and pushed together awkwardly.
"I'm.. kidding.." She says semi-convincingly. For some reason a slight sense of grief stirs in my chest. Random.
"I wouldn't be mad if you were."
"You're bad at flirting."
"Me? You're...awful. Jesus. What kind of trouble are you trying to get into in the seven eleven, though?"
"Oof i don't know. Perhaps an energy drink and something sweet. How 'bout you?"
"I think I'm gonna opt for the same."
I settled on the cherry limeade celsius and dark chocolate covered pretzels. She got the sour patch kids 'ghost energy' and a bag of jolly ranchers.
"Do you like these?" She gestures to her drink.
"I've never tried it, but sour patch kid flavor is...borderline unhinged."
"Wanna try it?" She cracks the can and hands it over to me. I reciprocate the gesture and we switch cans.
"Wow this is actually really good." She lifts her eyebrows and nods her head in approval.
"This tastes radioactive. I'm getting one every time I go to the gas station now."
We re-swap and she starts back on the road.
"Would you mind handing me a jolly rancher?"
"Yeah, of course. What's your favorite flavor?"
"Blue raspberry! How about you? You can have as many as you want, by the way."
"Cherry for sure. Blue raspberry is up there too, obviously."
I grab one of each and slip hers in between her pointer and middle fingers on the wheel.
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She opens the door for me as we step into the club. The entire place is consumed by red lighting, the walls are covered in art and it's a pretty good turnout.
"You wanna drink!?" She nods her head towards the bar
"Yeah for sure!"
She grabs my hand as we walk through the crowd. Her hand is cold and soft.
"So how do you know the band!?"
"I've known the drummer since second grade! we're still good friends!"
"Do any of your other friends from school come to the shows!?"
"Yeah, our friend group from high school comes to the shows, the ones that still live nearby, at least! They should all be here tonight though!"
"That's pretty cool!"
"What do you want to drink!?"
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She insisted on covering the tab. I got an amaretto sour and she got a lemon drop martini. We walk over to the crowd and she scans the area.
Val leans in close to my ear "They're over here."
She grabs my hand again and leads me to her friend group. She introduces me, and then tells me everyone's name. I repeat it to myself in my head until it sticks. Serena, Polly, Annie, Jolene, Belle, Bridget. Serena, Polly, Annie, Jolene, Belle, Bridget. Okay, got it. I think. The group and I exchange hellos and I catch Belle smile and raise her eyebrows at Valerie. As subtly as possible I look to Val, who blushes and slyly shakes her head.
The band comes out and the crowd 'woos' in encouragement. Jenna starts screaming, which absolutely catches me off guard. The group laughs along with the rest of the audience and the singer steps up to the mic. Val turns to me and whispers in my ear. "She's just like that, it's part of her shtick."
After a short and sweet introduction, the music starts.
I catch a glimpse of Val dancing. I can't help but smile, she looks so happy. Her black eyeliner is a little more smudged than before and her eyes glitter in the red lighting. I think this has crossed the line from a glimpse to a stare as I notice Polly in the background furrow her eyebrows and cross her arms.
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"You came on the right night, that was one of their best sets ever."
She speeds past me as we get closer to the car, opening the door for me.
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You know i often enjoy your takes on certain things but one thing iâve noticed with you which isnât great is that, you never bother to do a little research before posting things on your blog and to me, itâs just sloppy. If you had bothered to search just a little bit, you would have known that Jk didnât have any interest in SDT (where Taehyung is) i know u didnât say anything about TH but the unit Jungkook mentioned on that Live is different from SDT.
https://x.com/haidy8_8/status/1760955048073257374?s=46
So you are not wrong when u say he probably would have wanted to be in the special forces (SDT being one of the units but not the one Jk wanted) but iâm sure by now you also know that his tattoos didnât really have anything to do with him not being able to join the special forces but it was about the time. The unit he wanted was about 4 years so he couldnât do it and come back in time for the reunion. So i agree with you on the point that Jk might have wanted that because we know he likes to challenge himself.
But you know one thing you and many others are missing? Jimin might have wanted that too. You sound like Jk had no choice but to join the buddy system with Jimin because he couldnât do what he wanted but you donât know that. All we know is that Jk might have had an interest in the special forces but only he knows the reason why he didnât do it. We donât know if it had anything to do with Jimin or not. Plus, even if he couldnât do what be wanted, he didnât have to enlist with Jimin. He could have enlisted alone but he still choose to enlist with Jimin even though he had other options. Jungkook has probably known for years what the military rules are yet he still did everything he wanted to do to his body.
At the end of the day, we are all just speculating on the whys and why nots but all that we know for sure is that Jungkook and Jimin for some reason best known to them decided to enlist together. The reason could be what Jikookers think it is or not we will never know but the last thing you or anyone else should be doing is trying to invalidate this decision they both made especially because if this was any other pair, nobody would have been writing think pieces to reason out why they did it. Jikookers and other people arenât just saying this proves their closeness for nothing. There is literally precedence. In the past we have had moments which have shown that for some reason, Jimin and Jk actually really love being together. For you to pretty much spend all of your downtime in someone elseâs room, you must really love being around them so why are you surprised that they might have done this because they didnât want to go that long without seeing each other? Yâall say jikookers come at anyone who says otherwise but that is because everyone and their keeps trying to invalidate Jimin and Jungkookâs bond and this has gone on for years on end. Everything Jimin and Jk do is either fanservice, forced, not that deep, not special or because they had no choice. How tf did they have no choice when they could have enlisted separately? Regardless of what you think Jk wanted or not, him choosing to enlist with Jimin proves nothing other than the fact that those two are really close and love being with each other. All this mental gymnastics is just not going to change reality. You can spin it which ever way you want but at the end of the day, you know as much as i do that their decision to enlist together is very telling about how much to mean to each other.
The anon was asking me about Jungkook, not Jimin. I responded accordingly. They asked me how it would affect Jkk; again, I had no idea and responded that I didnât think it would/should, but I never said anything so concretely as to why. The issue seems more to be reading comprehension and knee-jerking every little thing I say because Jkkrs on Tumblr are aggrieved by my existence.
Iâm an opinion blog, not a fact checking blog. With all due respect, you say you enjoy my takes, which I understand to mean that youâve been here a while. I donât know for how long, but itâs known to a lot of readers who go way back that this is how Iâve always been. When I donât know something, I make it known. Thatâs where my responsibility endsâand as I very clearly mentioned to the OG anon, I wasnât going to have an answer (at least to what they were asking me, which was implicit). The fact I mention this should make it obvious where my weaknesses lie, and if people want to fact check me, they most certainly can. Some people have done so politely, but most people are focused on what makes them reactionary.
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itâs hilarious how frobin stans try and debunk every other robin ship. I found your debunking of lawbin post just by searching them up. Like your shit and stay in your lane. I recognise you too. Youâre the try-to-be sanctimonious frobin stan on Twitter that says they always try to âcheckâ toxic frobin stans but your likes consist of posts that trash other robin ships. I like frobin but the stans are worse than lunami shippers and have ruined frobin for me. It gives insecurity. The whole basis is âoh oda said theyâre the mom and dad of the crewâ. Yeah he also said Zoro is the dad and Usopp is the mother. So what then? All of u need to stop being so annoying
EVERYONE, I'm going to answer this ask because I want to educate. I have no idea if you return anon but hey... maybe you do and maybe you actually learn something from my post. But be aware I wrote it while being pissed off.
And sorry to all the LawBin fans who find this because of anon who did not censor the ship name. I don't control the anon.
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Mate... if I would try to seriously debunk La:wB:in I would put much more effort into it.
And what post do you mean? This one, that is two years old and posted because I tried to understand where you fans saw La:wB:in?
Or this one, with ONE (1) note, that I only answered because someone asked me? And sorry that I got a bit prissy in this one but I was annoyed by the fact that La:wB:in fans had spoiled me - while I was searching for FRobin on twitter - with something that turned out to be one of the thinnest anti-FRobin arguments that I've ever laid eyes on.
And I've seen quite a lot of anti-FRobin arguments. Honestly I have better anti-FRobin arguments than two people sitting beside each ohter!
"Like your shit and stay in your lane"
Yet, you are in my inbox.
"Youâre the try-to-be sanctimonious frobin stan on Twitter that says they always try to âcheckâ toxic frobin stans but your likes consist of posts that trash other robin ships."
True and even though it might seem insincere this ist the thought process: I hope that when I like their stuff - instead of retweeting it - they follow my twitter and see the many times I tweet "Please don't engage in fandom wank! Leave other shippers alone! Ship and let ship!"
And it is also true that I do sometimes tell peole "hey I'm sorry you had bad experiences with FRobin fans" because personally I mostly had positive ones. In my opinion FRobin fans are smart, calm, silent and love FRobin because it's healthy and wholesome. The exception from the rule? Most of the times Trolls.
I've told "FRobin fans" to stop to annoy others and they told me that they actually don't ship anything. Often enough people just want to stir shit up, making people hate "the shippers" and so "the ship".
Just like you. You fell for it and you also give a very bad image towards all of the La:wB:in shippers. But I know you're just a single warrior on your path of righteousness. Good luck finding the chill to not do that anymore, mate. Maybe read my pinned post?
Before anyone wonders why I made those screenshots: I sent them to a Zo:Ro:bin shipper to show them that maybe not every attack made by FRobin fans are actually FRobin fans. And the same goes for EVERY SHIP! EVERY SINGLE SHIP!
We different shippers and organiziers sometimes work together to bring shippers home, where they belong.
"I like frobin but the stans are worse than lunami shippers and have ruined frobin for me."
Here is a little fun fact: You can still enjoy FRobin without engaging with the fans. Just go read fanfiction on Ao3 without an account. Go on pixiv and deviantart and look at fanarts. Don't read tweets or tumblr posts. Curate your online expirence. It is really simple.
Also I don't know what LuNami has to do with anything... but you will find assholes for every ship and every fandom (yes, FRobin too). I tend to be quite the asshole sometimes. Luckily most of the time I calm down before I go full rage.
"It gives insecurity."
FRobin fans have nothing to be insecure about. We constantly make fun of our ship because of how safe we feel in our little vessel. It's a strong ship because we have a shipwright. ;)
"The whole basis is âoh oda said theyâre the mom and dad of the crewâ. Yeah he also said Zoro is the dad and Usopp is the mother. So what then? All of u need to stop being so annoying"
..... oh god I'm so tired. Please if you want to debunk FRobin just do your homework. If you want to know why people ship FRobin, here is some reading material. Go through it and then please give me something else to work with.
Why people ship FRobin:
Too much to read for you?
Take this:
"Franky and Robin are the mom and dad", mate that is not even accurate anymore. It's Jinbe now. Franky is a perverted Grandma.
God, imagine shipping FRobin only because of that... that is even a worse argument then "People only ship FRobin because of one non-canon scene in the anime". No dude...
The tag is "why I ship it" on this very blog. Educate yourself
#FRobin#not frobin#come on give me something to work with#I'm tired and bored#and I hope my RL friends don't learn that I answered this ask#because they said I should just delete it#but in case someone else finds this post#just do your homework before you come running into anyones inbox#and be aware of trolls#they are everywhere#they live for the wank#I hate that this is forgotten knowledge#kon
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I can't remember if I sent this to you already but could I request headcanons for aizawa, hizashi and Toshinori finding their s/o that has a chipmunk quirk that makes her fall into hibernation when it's too cold (kinda like tsu) but when the guys find her with her heart rate low and her breathing shallow maybe they freak a little bc she didn't tell them about that part of her quirk yet
omggggg this idea is literally so cute I got so excited when I first read it. Also thank you love for comin through with the requests, I really appreciate it! <3 I also hella struggled cuz like, what can someone with a chipmunk quirk do? Stuff their cheeks? Climb up trees? Also I legit forgot what a chipmunk even looked like I had to look it up lmaoooo im so dumb it hurts
Aizawa is an intimidating fella, okay
So when you first told him about your quirk, you were lowkey embarrassed?
Like, hereâs this grown-ass man with a badass quirk who is more than capable of taking down villains and defending himself, and here you are just-
đżď¸
But you know whatâs great about this man? He couldnât give less of a shit about your quirk or anything like that. He strikes me as the type to care more about personality than anything else
concealing your quirk is fairly easy. People probably wouldnât even know you had one if it wasnât for the small fluffy ears popping out of the top of your head, and even then you could just cover them with a hat
But that doesnât mean you donât experience the effects of your own quirk just because itâs subtle
You have a mutant type quirk, so you experience certain things that actual chipmunks do
Sometimes you wonât even notice that youâre stuffing your cheeks to full capacity with whatever youâre eating before Aizawa has to cut you off and just be like
ây/n. Chew.â
Or when youâre rushing, youâre usually going so fast that Aizawa can barely even see you zooming from room to room
you can also get kinda skittish at times, your ears twitching whenever you hear a noise that sounds weird or out of place, and youâll just look at Aizawa with wide eyes until he checks out what made a noise that he could barely hear
ây/n, it was just some kids outside.â
âOh... sorry, Sho.â
he wants to be frustrated, but he knows itâs not your fault. And honestly? He finds you so cute that he canât really stay mad at you
So heâll just let out a huff before patting your head lovingly, grazing his fingers over your ears (Which he KNOWS are sensitive, that asshole)
Experiencing long periods of deep sleep is also a thing. You wouldnât call it hibernation cuz you still have to do normal, everyday things, but there are times during the winter where youâll sleep for a few days in a row and only get up to go to the bathroom or eat
And since you canât actually burrow into the floor of your home, you usually make a blanket fort in the corner of your bedroom and stuff all of the pillows and blankets you can in there until itâs nice and warm, ready for you to bury yourself in
and you mightâve left that little part of your quirk out when you moved in together. whoops
So when Shouta comes home and sees the living room couch void of all of its pillows, heâs not expecting to walk into your shared bedroom and see you curled up in a blanket fort
heâs a bit curious at first, just kinda looking at you like âAll right, I guess this is normal?â
and heâll crouch down and kinda examine you for a bit before he eventually wonders if youâre even breathing? Youâre burried under blankets, so he canât really see your chest moving
eventually heâll check and see that your breathing is abnormally slow and he kinda just... pauses and checks again to make sure heâs not going crazy.
and he wont deny that he kinda freaks out at first, his immediate thought being that he needs to get you out of there, but the second he grabs the blankets to pull them off of you heâs like wait... hold up.
then it all clicks
youâre a mutant with a chipmunk quirk...
c h i p m u n k
safe to say heâs relieved, so he just lets you be and goes about his day.Â
When you wake up a few hours later to go to the bathroom, you come out of the bedroom with your clothes practically on backwards, rubbing at your eyes and stumbling past Aizawa like heâs not even there. And when youâre done, itâs right back to sleep you go
âBack to bed?â Aizawa would ask as he watches you with an amused smirk on his face
âMhm.â
âOkay. Goodnight, y/nâ
âMmânight.
Listen, when he first heard of your quirk, he thought it was the cutest shit ever
âYour quirk is Chipmunk?! Thatâs SOOOOOOOO CUUUUUUUTE!â
No heâs legit your number one hype man. If you think your quirk is lame, heâs literally shouting at you how cool he thinks you are.
âYou can stuff so much food in your mouth, y/n! And thatâs pretty dope if you ask me! Iâm totally jealous!â
speaking of food, heâll just randomly ask you to shove as much as you can of one thing in your cheeks until theyâre at full capacity.
âHey y/n, think you can shove this whole pack of jumbo marshmallows in your cheeks?â
âBut... I just bought those :(â
âIâll buy you more, LETâS DO THIS!!!â
also asks you the dumbest questions omg. You donât know if heâs genuinely curious or if heâs just doing it to piss you off
âSo do you just eat nuts all day?â
âYouâve seen me eat, Hizashi. No.â
âDo you prefer to sleep in trees?â
âThat would be extremely uncomfortable.â
âOoh youâd probably be great frieds with Kamui Woods then.â
âDid you not hear what I just said?â
He also REALLY likes your ears. Like an unhealthy amount? Whenever youâre around he literally wont stop touching them and even tugs on them playfully until youâre swatting at his hands and telling him to go away
He canât help that theyâre so cute :(
so on a particuallry cold day in winter when he has to go to work at the school, he leaves your home while youâre sleeping, only to come home hours later to find you... still sleeping?
You havenât moved an inch the entire time heâs been gone, so needless to say, heâs a litle concerned.
and when he checks to see if youâre still alive only to discover your heart rate is super slow, heâs A LOT concerned
His brain just goes to the most dramatic thing he can think of, which is that youâre in some weird coma and need to wake up
so rather than, i dont know, gently shaking you awake like a normal person, he grabs you buy your shoulders and starts shaking you violently while shouting your name loud as fuck
âY/NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNâ
âJESUS FUCKING CHRIST!â
you literally wake up so violently, you sit right up and shove him off of you before asking whatâs wrong with him, pretty sure youâve officially gone deaf
He then explains that he thought you were in a coma or something cuz your heartbeat was so slow, and at that point you just roll your eyes because of course he would come up with this ridiculous conclusion
âHizashi, my quirk is chipmunk and itâs a mutation quirk.â
He doesnât even get what youâre getting at, just tilting his head in confusion as he squints at you.
âWhat do chipmunks do in the winter, babe?â
Cue more confused squinting
âOh my god, they hibernate, you headass.â
it finally clicks and the look on his face makes it seem like he just learned the secret of the universe, and afterwards heâs going on about how cool that is while you just roll your eyes and lay back down to try and go back to sleep, bringing the blanket over your head to try and drown him out
He eventually gets the hint and leaves, but after a while, you kinda feel bad for blowing up on him. He was just concerned and didnât fully understand your quirk
so letting out a huff, you pull the blanket down and call out his name, to which he immediately runs to you at the sound of, asking you what you need
you just wordlessly lift up the blanket to expose the empty side of the bed, and oh boy, the size of the grin he gets on his face is unmatched
immediately throws off his hero costume so that you can both be comfortable and jumps into bed with you, holding you impossibly close
you fall asleep in a matter of minutes while he just looks at you fondly, hand soothingly rubbing your back.
Just like the other two, he finds you incredibly cute. Like mans is in love, okay?
everytime he sees your little ears twitch, he just gets the strongest urge to touch them, but he never does without your consent becuase he knows how sensitive they are.
âUh... y/n, do you mind if I... touched your ears?âÂ
Baby probably feels so awkward asking ugh PLEASE REASSURE HIM
âOh? Yeah, of course, Toshi. Knock yourself out.â
oooh he���s excited. Heâll be super gentle about it, just lightly grazing them with his fingers before gently rubbing them between his thumb and forefinger
and at that point youâre littlerally melting, practically falling into him because him caressing your ears like this feels absolutely amazing
When he sees how itâs affecting you, he immediately becomes a blushing mess and apologizes, but you just hug him and tell him itâs okay and that you liked it
yeah he definitely rubs your ears whenever youâre feeling stressed or anxious because itâs become a quick way to relax you
only when he does it though. If anyone else randomly touches your ears, you get kinda uncomfortable
Just because they donât look human doesnât mean they still werenât a part of you, dammit
Anyways, one day when youâre waiting for Toshi to come back home, youâve got yourself wrapped up like a burrito in your blanket, sitting on the couch as you watched tv
it had been snowing all day, but luckily Toshinori had turned up the thermostat before he left, remembering how you mentioned that youâre not a huge fan of the cold
unfortunately for you, the harsh weather had no trouble taking out the power, leaving you in the dark and the cold
it didnât take long for the cold to start seeping in through the cracks in the windows, and you quickly began to grow tired before you inevitibly passed out on the couch, still wrapped tightly in your blanket
When Toshi gets home and sees you on the couch, his first reaction is âaw, how cute.â
but then when he comes up to you and starts calling out your name to try and wake you up and you just wonât, and then he notices how much your breathing has slowed down, he quickly growns concerened.
Heâs not in full panic mode yet, but heâs getting there, and heâs quick to crouch down to your level and grab your shoulders to start shaking you to wake you up
which you do, blinking groggily at him like you werenât just in full hibernation mode
âOh... Hey, Toshi,â you mumble, and you reach up to wrap your arms around his neck to pull him down so that you can nuzzle yourself into his warm chest
Heâs not able to ask you about what happened to you before youâve already fallen back asleep, and when the power comes back on a few minutes later, he does a quick google search on chipmunks and mutant quirks before putting two and two together
Now heâs thinking of all the ways he could make you something to burrow into during those especially cold winters
#mha headcanons#mha x reader#all might headcanons#toshinori headcanons#toshinori x reader#aizawa headcanons#shouta aizawa x reader#present mic headcanons#present mic x reader#hizashi yamada x reader#bnha headcanons#eraserhead headcanons#eraserhead x reader#request#ask
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Hi! What would you think about writing a fic where Tom and reader are both working on a show or movie or something, and they have feelings for each other, but they're too nervous to do anything, and then they both end up in a prop closet or something alone, and then â¨stuff⨠happens? If not that's fine!!
a/n: uhhh i got really carried away with this, and am really obsessed with the idea so thank u for sending it over!! also actress!reader is like my favorite trope to read so it really was no shock this was my favorite to write! i also did my best to portray tom as the gemini man he is. also, my inbox is open, send over requests!
warnings:Â cussing, sexual tension u could cut with a knife, an intense make out sesh (no smut)
word count: 2211
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the long nights on set were beginning to catch up with you and your costars. every day you felt more delusional, surviving only by the caffeine that tom would bring every morning. it was really a routine at this point, youâd sit down in the chair of the hair and makeup trailer, and one minute later tom would stroll in with your exact order.
âand an iced matcha for the diva,â he liked to joke. that was his nickname for you, diva. he thought that maybe youâd pick up on his flirting if he started calling you names like diva, and princess. you payed no mind to him, because you thought he was making fun of you. that he didnât take you seriously, and that was frustrating, because, well, you had feelings for him. you werenât entirely sure how he felt about you, though, and it was driving you insane. youâd convince yourself you would be okay without him, that if he didnât like you back, youâd survive it. but then he would walk in to the trailer, holding your matcha, and calling you diva. you couldnât push aside the euphoria that rushed through your body every time he called you that. you actually really enjoyed it, but tried to ignore that as the embarrassment of him making fun of you settled in.
tom was really cocky too, but you assumed that came with being an excellent actor, and being quite successful. youâd talk to your friends about him, because when were you not talking to him? when were you not thinking about him?
âheâs so cocky, maybe i donât actually have feelings for him,â youâd explain. âhe walks around calling me names, who does he think he is?â
your friends would groan, because they heard this everyday. they would go from âyeah he sucksâ to âaw, you should tell him how you feel, you two would be so cute together.â
you just felt so stuck. youâd act in scenes with him, and would feel the connection, but as soon as the director yelled cut the connection would turn to a code that you couldnât decipher. you really couldnât figure him out.
he would abruptly open your trailer door, and yell, âhey princess, letâs get going theyâre ready for us!â
youâd roll your eyes, but walk with him to set anyways, because you enjoyed his presence. you were friends, at this point. he would invite you to his place for game nights, and take you out to dinner during particularly hard days. he would show up to your place, unannounced, with a pack of trulyâs- just cause. you would give him rides to set, and get him his favorite food when heâs filming. you tried not to think about how often he would send you the âyou up?â text, because you didnât want to convince yourself this was something, when there was a possibility it was nothing.
but, you really liked him. he was tom holland, your celebrity crush. the person youâd call when youâre sad. the person who youâd run scenes with for hours on end, and never get tired of being around him. the person who you could just look at, and feel safe. he was home to you, you just didnât know he felt the same. so, when the electricity went out during a particularly bad storm in Atlanta, and you and tom were in the supplies closet alone, you werenât exactly prepared for what was about to happen.
âyou really ordered an iced matcha while thereâs, like, a borderline hurricane happening outside?â tom exclaimed. he stared at you as you stood up, and grabbed the drink from his hand.
âyes, i really did,â you shot back. âwhat are you gonna do? call me a âdivaâ?â you smiled at him, and his eyes slowly moved down your body than back up to meet your eyes. yes, he really did just check you out, but you were sure you only imagined that in your head.
âi might,â tom replied, then sat in the chair next to you. âitâs still early, though. thereâs time to catch up on the name-calling.â
âiâm looking forward to it,â you teased, rolling your eyes at him. sometimes pushing tom was fun. tom shot you a glare, and you smiled to yourself as you sat back down.
âweather is crazy, huh?â tom observed. âiâm not the biggest fan of big storms like this.â
you looked over at him, noticing the concern on his face.
âi think theyâre fun, i absolutely love just sitting at the window, and watching rain,â you confessed. the two of you were looking at each other, the only noise was the rain outside the trailer. your heart was beating so hard, you were certain tom could hear it. just the two of you, alone in a trailer. nothing new, yet something felt wildly different this time. perhaps it was tomâs vulnerability due to the storm happening outside.
the feelings you were marinating in were disrupted by the trailer doors being opened, and the makeup artists walking in.
âso sorry weâre late, the storm is insane,â one of them apologized.
âno need to be sorry, tanya, weâre just glad you got here safely,â you replied. tom nodded his head in agreement, and they started to work their magic on the two of you. while in the makeup chair, you and tom decided at the beginning of filming that you would switch who plays the music every day. so, your day to play the music was today, and even though the two of you agreed on this, tom complained.
âwhy canât i just play the music today? you always play the same songs,â he whined. you rolled your eyes at him, trying to ignore him.
âoh god not taylor swift again!â tom groaned. you loved that even though you were the one who was perceived as dramatic, tom was actually the diva.
âtom, shut up,â you said back. âyou are so annoying when it comes to this shit.â
you looked over at him, and he was looking at you. his eyes sparkled in the light, and you felt your stomach flutter at the way he stared you down. you looked away, staring back down at your phone to try and recover.
a few moments passed, and the two of you were done with hair and makeup. now was the real challenge, getting to the set during the insane storm.
âwhereâs the umbrella, tom?â you asked while you looked around.
âi have no idea,â he answered. you looked up and glared at him.
âdidnât you bring it over here? i couldâve sworn you were holding one when we walked here twenty minutes ago,â you mocked. tom smiled.
âitâs right here, iâm just messing with you,â he replied.
âyouâre so annoying,â you remarked.
you grabbed your script and the matcha, then made your way over, talking about the scenes you were shooting today. this was something the two of you did almost every day, you liked to rehearse your lines before getting on the stage. when the two of you arrived, you set down your script, but kept drinking your matcha as you and tom started blocking. this was something you did before every scene, and was what made your days so long. you had to work out every detail of the scene youâd be filming before actually filming it; which was time-consuming, and sometimes frustrating. you and tom were set up at a table for this scene, sitting across from one another.
ây/n, if you could just move your head more towards the right, weâd get a better shot,â the director called out. so you did, and in doing so, your hand moved with you, and knocked the matcha off the table.
âoh shit,â you said, looking back at the director with an apologetic face. âiâll clean it up, donât even worry!â
tom sat across from you, laughing at you as you scooped the ice off the ground, and put it back into your cup.
âthat doesnât sound good,â the director replied.
âno, donât even worry! iâm totally cleaning this up, itâs gonna be spotless,â you breathed out. you were extremely worried, though. the green liquid covered the floor of the diner set that was built. tom eventually started helping you.
âthis is ridiculous, y/n, you canât scoop the liquid with your hands,â he observed. âletâs go get some paper towels, okay?â
you looked up at him with watery eyes, you were worried that you had just ruined a set that took a while to build.
âokay,â you agreed. the director walked up to the two of you, looking at the spilled drink then back at you.
âiâd think paper towels would be more helpful than your hands, y/n,â he joked. âdonât you think?â
you nodded, âyes, tom and i will be right back with those.â
you and tom walked in silence over to the supplies closet, where they kept the paper towels.
âso embarrassing,â you let out under your breath.
âwhat was that?â tom asked. he opened the door to the closet, and turned the light on. the closet was huge, so both of you went in to look for the paper towels.
âitâs so embarrassing, doing that in front of everyone,â you admitted. âi shouldnât have had my drink there.â
tom scoffed, âoh please, we all bring our drinks with us when weâre blocking, anyone couldâve done that!â
you nodded in agreement, uncertain of your voice at the moment, so you opted to stay silent. the lights started flickering right as you found the paper towels.
âthat was weird,â tom announced.
âyeah, that was weird,â you replied.
the lights flickered again, and within seconds you were in pitch black.
âwow,â you let out. âtom, where are you?â
âiâm right here,â he said. you laughed, because you thought it was a ridiculous answer. you put your arms out, and tried to walk towards him.
âdo you have your phone? i need a flashlight,â you asked.
âno, i left it out there,â he replied.
âshit, me too,â you noted. âput your arms out, i canât find you.â
âokay,â he said. you walked for a few seconds, then ran into him.
âthere you are,â you commented.
âhere i am,â he said. the two of you were standing so close, his hot breath was felt on your face. your eyes started to adjust to the darkness, and you could see his features now. you could see his lips. oh my god, you could almost feel his body against yours. you felt butterflies in your stomach as you realized just how close he was to you. you could just touch him, you thought. you could, you really could just grab his face, and kiss him. right here, right now.
âshould we try looking for the door?â you asked out loud. the silence was killing you, you had to escape it. tom stood still, breathing harder with every second. âtom?â
âyou talk too much, you know that?â he breathed out. you were so taken aback by that statement, your breath grew shaky. âevery time i try to make a move, you talk. you just-you talk too much.â
you stood there, in the dark, in absolutely disbelief.
âoh,â you let out. you didnât know what to do, you were frozen. your eyes were completely adjusted now, and you could see tom more clearly. his face, his arms, his hands, everything. his hands moved up your body, starting at your hips then making their way to your face. you brought your hands around his neck, you were breathing so hard you felt as if you could pass out.
âyou are so beautiful, y/n,â he revealed. âso fucking beautiful.â
you smiled, although you werenât sure he could see that. your hands moved to his face, you cupped his cheeks into your hands. tom moved his face closer to yours, cupping your cheeks as well. he placed his lips onto yours, then started to kiss you. like, really kiss you. not a cute, little peck that you would see in the movies. a rough, passionate kiss. the kiss you had been waiting for all this time. one of his hands dropped to your lower back, and he pushed your body onto his. your hands started to move under his shirt, as your tongues started to swirl together. your cheeks flushed as the warmth of his tongue and body encapsulated you. his hand moved off your cheek, and started to move under your shirt to take it off.
the door abruptly opened, and a bright flashlight made you and tom move your hands up to your face. your bodies broke apart, but the damage was done.
âtom, y/n, we need you back on set, theyâre about to turn on the generator,â one of your costars said. âoh, donât forget the paper towels.â they started laughing, as well as both you and tom.
the three of you walked back, and you wiped your mouth, then looked at tom. he smiled at you, then put his hand around your waist.
you leaned into him, then whispered, âweâll have to finish that later.â
he shook his head in agreement, âokay, diva.â
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OBEY ME! LESSON 53 DETAILED SUMMARY + THEORIES
Some time seems to have passed between the end of the last lesson and the beginning of this one. Leviâs tired after pulling an all-nighter with Diavolo to finish a game and Mammonâs laughing at all the pictures Luke is sending him of all the desserts his making and the step by step process heâs following. Beel happily notes that Mammon & Luke have been chatting a lot lately. Mammon red in the face but smiling happily says itâs like heâs got a new minion whoâs also fun to mess with, Asmo says it looks more like Mammonâs got a tiny little brother with the way Mammonâs being fawning over him (my heart this is so cute I need to write more fics with them interacting), Mammon denies it but Asmo says it holds no ground when Mammon canât seem to stop smiling so happily. Lucifer has found an art book that Satanâs being looking everywhere desperately for and invites Satan to come take a look at it together, Satan postures a bit but agrees. Belphie says thereâs a lot of strange friendships popping up lately, though Beelâs happy that Satan & Lucifer have been getting along better, Asmo thinks the way Satanâs being acting around Lucifer recently is strange and Belphie says itâs a sign of Armageddon. Asmo asks MC if they knew any reason behind the sudden change and they just say the two discovered new sides of each other which makes the other 3 more confused, with Asmo particularly lusting for the gossip. Belphie wonders if this means the anti-lucifer league would disband and Satan who hears this says thatâs dumb cause he can take the chance to pull a prank of Lucifer when he goes to his room to check out the book. MC says they thought him and Lucifer were finally friends but satan says even the thought makes him sick, Asmo asks if heâs sure since the two seem like the best of friends recently. Satan quotes Sun Tzu saying âIf you know your enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battlesâ. A door bell rings and Lucifer tells MC to go get it. Itâs Solomon & Barbatos and MC asks them what theyâre doing here together. Solomon revealâs itâs time for their sorcererâs preliminary exams. (Did MC get all 7 stars already? Or 6 I guess if this exam gives the last star)
Ok so MC has 4 stars the preliminary is for the 5th star and final is for the 7th. Asmo has apparently filled the others on whatâs gonna happen. Mammon asks for compensation, Beel wishes MC good luck, Lucifer tells them they should actually fill MC in, Asmo says Solomon had contacted him asking the brothers to help with the exam, MC says âcool what do I gotta doâ, Solomon says they have to win a game of Tail Thieves and gets Barbatos to explain, Barbatos complains how Solomon always makes him explain things to people and I completely forgot that Solomon has a pact with Barbatos meaning they must be pretty close, meaning Asmo & Barbatos must be pretty close too and I need to see the dynamic between these 3 more. Solomon is going to use magic to give everyone animal tails and MC has to be the last one standing, if they lose their tail they fail the exam. (AND AHHHHHHHHHHHHH Iâd love to see the animal event costumes being used in the main storyline and MC getting a tail? Itâs have to be a sheep right?) To motivate the brothers to steal MCâs tail, stealing someoneâs tail means theyâre cursed to obey one command from you and sure thatâs not gonna end in disaster. MCâS A SHEEP!!!!!! Iâve had this idea of what their costume would look like for a while ahhhh Also Barbatos is a bat? Do batâs have tails? I feel like I should know this⌠(it apparently depends on the species of bat, given his colour lets just say Barbatos is a devildom bat). MC goes hey so this is 1 vs 8???? And Solomon says heâs giving them Asmo & Barbatos. Mammon brings up the fact that MC can just command them and Solomon says thatâll be against the rules. Barbatos asks if MC can use his or Asmoâs powers and Solomon says itâs fine as long as itâs a direct order from MC meaning they canât use their powers themselves. MC brings up the fact that since they donât have a pact with Barbatos they canât use his powers and to make up for it Solomon gives MC Barbatosâ grimoire which will give the bearer full control over the demon who it belongs to even without a pact. MC has a flashback to the tomb under the HoL and the brothersâ grimoire, remembering that a command powered through a grimoire can overpower a command from a pact & that everything about a demon rides on their grimoire meaning they can never let it be stolen. Levi is absolutely stunned that Solomon has something so personal and precious and Barbatos reveals that he entrusted it to Solomon on his own free will and holy shit Barbatos & Solomon must be way closer than I realised⌠which even Levi says. Lucifer says if they steal MCâs tail and command them to hand over the grimoire they would be able to read it and Barbatos laughs and says that theyâd find out everything about him and suddenly the whole game has become about reading Barbatosâ grimoire (even Asmo seems interested), which Solomon seems pleased about since itâs given all the brothers a more solid goal. Solomon starts the game.
The brothers all scatter to hide leaving MC, Asmo and Barbatos in the living room. Barbatos says the brotherâs have probably left to find a place they can use to their advantage and that if they are able to figure out what that place would be for each brother they could make strategies to counteract them. Asmo swoons about how Barbatos is the whole package by being handsome and intelligent. Asmo says this makes him more interested in finding out more about Barbatos and he asks MC if he can take a teensy peek at the grimoire and they immediately shut him down. Barbatos thanks them for being a decent person (honestly the lowest bar to clear) and says because Solomon thought it was the best decision to give MC the grimoire he wonât object but also âwe donât really know each other at all so pls donât use that it literally contains a record of my entire pastâ MC readily agrees because âthe only conversations weâve ever had is about tea weâre definitely not ready for any deep therapy sessionsâ. Heâs grateful but emphasizes on it again and MC promises they wonât use it. Asmo complains about this, saying itâll be impossible to beat the others while only using Asmoâs powers. Mammon hears that MC wonât be using the grimoire and reveals himself, Asmo says he was stupid for not finding a place where heâd have the advantage and MC says maybe this is that place for him, Asmo says that maybe cause this is where Lucifer always ties him up he thinks of this as his home turf. Mammon gets ready to fight Asmo & MC, Barbatos says âlol lemme take care of this and prove to you that Iâm dangerous even without my powersâ.
Barbatos manages to defeat Mammon and hang him from the ceiling using only hand to hand combat. Asmo tells Mammon if he canât beat someone using only hand-to-hand combat MC might end up firing him, Mammon gets freaked out MC nods along and asks if theyâre serious and they tell him not to worry cause they arenât, heâs happy and calls MC the best, Asmo just sadly calls MC a simp. Asmo says that Barbatos has tied the ropes looser and that Lucifer ties them in a tight artful style. Whether MC pulls the tale off in one swift movement or gently itâll tickle. He returns to normal and immediately starts yelling at MC to hurry up an give him an order and Asmo realises how scary Solomonâs curse really is. Asmo says even when Mammon is not cursed MC can get him to do pretty much anything by asking the right way cause Mammonâs whipped, so really they wonât be getting anything new or special. Barbatos provides a solution for this by telling them they can get him to admit something he usually wouldnât. MC asks him; 1.) who his favourite brother is â Â he says, âThatâs easy! Itâs Lucifer, of course. Iâve always loved him and I always will.â I like to think MC knew exactly what he was going to say and took out their phone to record it to later show Lucifer. 2.) If thereâs a brother heâs keeping a secret from â He took clothes and shoes from Asmoâs cupboard and sold them. Asmo swears to kill Mammon once all this is over. 3.) If thereâs anything he loves more than money â MC. He says thereâs nothing and no one more important to him. He says he loves them and that heâd take them over money any day. Asmo whoâs honestly MC and Mammonâs #1 shipper (remember the beach event, and the parfait devilgram and the chat where he got excited when MC smelt like Mammon) laughs and says âI knew it!â. For all 3 Mammon realises what heâs said and tries to take it back. They are later unable to find Lucifer â who would be the hardest to beat according to Barbatos - in the music room, Barbatos recalls Simeon telling him how Satan and Lucifer have started getting along and Asmo says heâs suddenly got a bad feeling.
they donât find anyone in either Satan or Luciferâs rooms, Asmo suggests MC using the grimoire to locate Lucifer, MC shuts it down and Barbatos thanks them and tells Asmo to drop it. Asmo asks MC why they have to be so serious despite him loving that part of them. Asmo asks MC if they know what Barbatos can do, how powerful he really is, they say he can see through time and Barbatos agrees with it but Asmo asks him to give MC a more detailed description of his powers since he anyway made them promise not to use his grimoire. He then says he has the power to create a portal to anywhere, including through time but creating portals through time has much more limitations than creating a normal portal to just a different place and that his control also becomes less stable. Asmo asks if thatâs why Barbatos doesnât let him go to the past or future no matter how much he begs. Barbatos says, âno thatâs cause ik if I did youâd either fuck some powerful historical figure and mess up the entire timeline or youâd try to fuck yourself and the entire universe would implodeâ. Asmo calls him mean and Barbatos laughs but does say that since his control through time is not the best a person may end up skipping either backwards or forwards through time each time they pass through a doorway after they travel through his portal to the new time. He says thatâs all heâs willing to tell MC. Asmo asks MC where they would go if they could go anywhere. If they say past Barbatos asks if thereâs something they want to change or if thereâs someone whoâs past they want to spy on. If they say future Asmo says heâd love to go to the future to see how much more beautiful heâs become and to see how his and MCâs relationship has progressed. MC asks Barbatos where heâd like to go and he says nowhere, cause his place is by Diavoloâs side. MC asks him why he serves Diavolo and what he did before it â he says heâs not gonna answer cause he isnât sure if itâs a good idea to trust MC the same way he trusts Solomon. Asmo giggles about how cold Barbatos is but says thatâs one of the things he loves about him. Barbatos asks Asmo if he might know where Satan is and he says he has an idea.
They go to the home theatre where one of Satanâs favourite movies â about a deadly monster shark â is playing until suddenly everything goes dark. Someone wraps their arms around Asmo and he squeals telling MC theyâre so naughty for wanting to do something here in the dark when Barbatos was with them, Satan tells him that heâs restraining Asmo not embracing him. The lights are off cause despite being brothers Asmo could charm them by looking into their eyes. Asmo complains but also loves the âroleplayâ theyâre doing and how Satan snuck up behind him and restrained him and now he needs a moment to get his boner down, Satanâs understandably very upset by this. Lucifer ends up sneaking behind MC and restraining them (despite it being dark Barbatos is able to see him coming and tries to warm MC), heâs impressed that they were able to recognise him but says they shouldnât have left their back open. Barbatos asks why they left him free and Lucifer says he knows MC wonât use the grimoire, even if itâs their last option, cause it would upset Barbatos. Lucifer goes to remove MCâs tail but MC signals Barbatos with their eyes and he sees the remote next to him and grabs it & throws it to MC (so I guess this establishes that Barbatos can see in the dark). MC catches it and presses a quick combination of buttons that plays a movie about three cats going on a journey together. Satan obviously starts gushing about the cats and lets Asmo go, Lucifer calls him an idiot and MC commands Asmo. Satan initially doesnât even notice Asmo cause of the cats which pisses him off but in the end the roleplay made him excited which made his charm more appealing. Lucifer had used every ounce of his willpower and just managed to escape but they take Satanâs tail.
In the twinsâ room Asmo laughs about the face Satan made at whatever his order was and Barbatos says Satan making such a face could signify the end times and Asmo says itâs no joke if Barbatos is saying that. Belphieâs fast asleep in his bed and MC leaves him for later cause it wouldnât be fair to take the tail now. Asmo wonders why Solomon made this MCâs exam when their final exam wonât give a shit if theyâre good at tail thieves or not. MC says maybe he thought itâd be funny to see Barbatos disagrees with thar but Asmo says itâs natural to jump to their own conclusions when Solomon never answers questions and that Solomon hasnât changed in that way since they first made their pact. MC asks for the story behind it Asmo says Solomon knew exactly what to say to get what he wanted from Asmo but could also dodge questions without making it obvious he was doing so. On the first night heâd met Solomon Asmo had been really depressed cause heâd spotted a cute human but the other people who were hanging around her had stated calling him âevil and wicked and other horrible thingsâ and he couldnât get close to her (so last yr someone told me the actual biblical story behind this and itâs FUCKED UP and I like to imagine thatâs what actually happened in OM! too but Asmo is heavily censoring it for MC. Remember the pretty graphic description Asmo gave to MC about how heâd kill them in S1? Yeah I 100% believe heâs lying to MC about how things went down here). Heâd been sitting in a tavern sulking when Solomon had started talking to him. He had listened to Asmo and had been so warm and caring Asmo had accidentally let it slip that he was Luciferâs brother, theyâd drunk the night away and when Asmo woke up the next day he had somehow made a pact with Solomon and HOLY SHIT this is so shady Solomon wtf. Barbatos says it probably wasnât a coincidence he ran into Solomon and Solomon would have known who he was from the beginning (imagine how pissed off Lucifer must have been when Asmo came back with a pact). Asmo says Solomon and Barbatos meeting wasnât a coincidence either and Barbatos agrees but says it happened long before Solomon and Asmo made a pact. Solomon had summoned Barbatos using a special incantation that heâd created himself and Asmoâs shocked that doing all that and summoning a demon as powerful as Barbatos hadnât killed him. Barbatos said that Solomon had actually been on the verge of death when Barbatos arrived. MC asked why heâd risk it to summon Barbatos, Barbatos said that even back then there was something Solomon wanted even more than his own life and that the encounter made Barbatos curious and he wanted to learn more about Solomon and eventually this would lead to him forming a pact with Solomon (given how Barbatos is Iâd imagine it took time for Solomon to form a pact with him because Barbatos would need to be able to trust him first). He says that though itâs hard to say what Solomonâs plans are he thinks highly of him enough to trust him with his grimoire. He says whether his decision is good or bad is up to them to judge but that their teacher is a genius unlike anyone else in the 3 worlds. Saying their breakâs being long enough they head to the kitchen.
They find Beel eating and Asmo scolds him for using the ice cream maker without permission after Lucifer banned him cause last time he ate so much he got sick. Asmo uses this to blackmail Beel into giving up his tail. Removing it tickles a lot and as heâs handing it over Beel blushes and apologises for âthe weird little shriekâ he made at the end. Barbatos wonders why the fuck the seven of them are considered to be among the mot powerful demons in the Devildom when this is what theyâre actually alike and Asmo says Barbatos should be disappointed in Beel and not the both of them. Asmo says that this whole exam seems pointless when this is what itâs like but when Beel starts begging for orders he tells MC to give one. They ask him what they would like for their final meal ever (the other two options are âletâs get romanticâ and for him to feed something to Barbatos) He says one of Simeonâs BLTs but then starts listing food from both the human world and Devildom before ending with apple pieâŚ.and isnât apple pie the answer Beelâs VA gave for this same question? Thatâs really sweet that they added it.  Asmo says by the time he finished all that heâd have passed his death. Beelâs still begging for orders and they realise the curse is to follow the orders of the person who pulled the tail off and not MC. Asmo gets waaay to excited for this and Beel freaks out and uses puppy dog eyes to start pleading with MC for help, MC tells Asmo to cool it but Asmo says heâll never get a chance like this again and Beel despairs. And thatâs it. Beelâs doomed to his fate and we have no idea what happens.
#obey me spoilers#my posts#my theories#obey ne#swd obey me#obey me!#shall we date? obey me!#obey me shall we date
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TWIN REVENGE
This is an old one, just thought Iâd share..... Its of my shortest stories. Any feedback appreciated - [email protected]Â
REUNION
Iâve always been the odd twin out. Will and I were both named William C. Witt with the only difference being our middle names â Charles and Conner. Iâve never liked being called âWillyâ while William preferred âWillâ. Growing up, our parents couldnât tell us apart - we even have the same birthmark on our chins.Â
Iâve always been jealous of Will for being the favorite. Many times, Iâd answer to my brotherâs name on purpose or force Will to swap places with me. The first time I was Will was when he was failing algebra in 9th grade and didnât want our parents to find out. We swapped places so I could take his tests. My condition was that I stay as him for the day â soaking up my parentâs adoration and love. Will was definitely our parentâs favorite which pissed me off the older I got, often lashing out for attention. In high school I started impersonating my brother to get him in trouble. Sometimes, I would get caught because my brother would have an alibi with friends backing him up, or Iâd would slip up wearing my hair differently or some other little detail.Â
By our junior year, I started hanging with another group of friends and dealing drugs. My reputation for trouble followed me as my âbusinessâ grew. Will knew what I was up to because people would mistake him for their dealer. Weeks before graduation, the principal caught me selling drugs red handed, thanks to a tip from Will. Since Witts are a powerful family, Dad worked a deal to allow me to graduate on the condition that I spend the summer in rehab. The deal was made and the day after graduation, Dad drove me to the rehab center. I lasted a week before escaping and never being seen again.
My drug pals smuggled me out of Los Angeles to northern California. San Francisco was the perfect spot for me. With my college age looks, I blend in on local high school and college campuses where my business grew exponentially. I wear the college gear that fit the campuses I was working daily. Iâve always been thrifty with my earnings and always a light user myself so I saved my money for a future free of drugs. When I can, I sit in on college classes, mostly political science since my father was always drilling politics into Will and I.Â
Will on the other hand, was the perfect son. He attended college for political science, becoming a staunch conservative. But Will wasnât always perfect. After two years in college, he dropped out and was hired at Prager U as a campus correspondent to interview students and follow trends. Will quickly picked up a fan base nationally and within months was buying a condo and new car â with the help of a proud rich father. Will travels the country giving speeches, interviewing people and blogging.
Mom and dad have all but forgotten about me. I faked my own death and changed my name when I heard my family was looking for me. It was convincing enough that the Witts even had a funeral for me.Â
CAMPUS LIFE
Iâm at Stanford University working my regular ârouteâ, supporting my boys with product. A few girls spot me, come running over and one screams. âOh my god, Will! Iâm your biggest fan.âÂ
I wonder why theyâre calling me Will and fawning over me? âHi, thank you so much.â
âWe canât wait to hear you speak. You going to do a âman on the streetâ?â the other one squeals.
âSure am.â Not knowing what that is even. I see one of my boys coming over for his weekly stash. âExcuse me ladies, Iâm meeting an old friend.â
Tyler comes over with his usual swagger carrying his backpack. âDo I have competition bro?â
âNo, not at all! You know youâre my main man.â We do his fratâs handshake. Anyone watching us would see us both in Stanford gear and just assume weâre students. We take a seat on a nearby bench, talk business, two minutes later, heâs leaving with my backpack full of drugs.
I walk around campus, wondering about those two girls calling me Will. When I get to the campus hub, I see my face plastered all over the board. The flyers reads âWill Witt, Prager University, Topic: Campus Diversityâ. I pull one off the board, fold it up and place it in my backpack pocket. Iâll be damned, my little brother in town. I have to see this for myself.
I get home and study the flyer, find the Prager U site and start watching my brotherâs videos. Weâre so alike with our political beliefs â neither of us have fallen far from our fatherâs tree. We both have the same attitudes and beliefs as good old dad. He even sounds like dad did, around the dinner table our entire life. I then log into his Instagram account, using Willâs password heâs been using for a decade. Iâm getting envious of my brotherâs life â heâs still the golden boy and Iâm sure dad is super proud of him. Heâs traveling all over the world thanks to this Prager gig. On top of that, heâs become famous on Fox and other mediums for being very articulate and full of energy.Â
As I watch him, Iâm getting very envious of Will. Iâm as smart and talented as my brother. I could have been the favorite son, the celebrity. âShould be, could be, will be.â I think to myself. That should be my life.
The next day, I head to a theater supply store and buy a fake belly, beard/mustache and some make up. Iâve got to see my brother in action today. Will is scheduled to do a âman on the streetâ interview on campus this afternoon, then the speech later tonight.Â
I show up for his man on the street interview but hang way back, out of sight of Will. With my disguise, Iâve gained 50lbs, a full beard, sunglasses and wearing a tie dyed hoodie. I watch and listen as Will, his producer and camera man set up everything. I record everything with a shotgun microphone - hearing the back and forth banter between Will, his cameraman Gavi and Mike, his producer. That evening, I attend the lecture in another disguise just to be safe. Iâve havenât seen Will in over two years but heâs still the same arrogant Will in private. In public heâs very friendly and charming. As Iâm listening to Will speak, a plan starts to formulate in the back of my mind. Willy is already dead to the world, so why not become Will. Itâs not like Iâm inexperienced in doing it. It would always piss Will off when I would steal his identity and fool his girlfriends. While he was taking a shower, I would get dressed first, take his clothes, phone, car and pick up his girlfriend who was clueless. Will would be pissed but I would apologize and he would forgive me. One time Will called his girlfriend while I was impersonating him and couldnât convince her that he was actually Will â I was that good.Â
I start tracking my brother via his emails, calendar and social media. Will is flying from Los Angeles to Washington for a week, with Turning Point USA to promote Prager U and himself. Our parents will also be gone on vacation to Europe for months, with plans to hook up with Will in London for lunch and a show in a month.
MOVING TO LOS ANGELES
I need to formulate a detailed plan. Will has lived the good life long enough, itâs my turn now. I start with cleaning up my life here â telling my friends that I need to disappear again. They buy it easily as it has happened before. I clean out my bank account â about $1m, and drive to Hollywood where Will lives.
I rent a furnished apartment across the street from Willâs condo. Itâs perfect â from my living room and bedroom, I can see his entrance and garage. I keep my fake beard and baseball cap on all the time, and only use the back entrance to go anywhere. On his departure day, I watch him being picked up by an airport service and confirm his flight took off on schedule. I head to my bathroom and remove my beard and hide my longer hair under a baseball cap. The condo manager gladly provides âWillâ with a spare key when I tell him I lost mine.
Willâs condo is very nice with an open floorplan. Thereâs 3 bedrooms and 3.5 baths. The lower level is a 2 car garage, lots of storage, a large video recording studio and utility room. His silver Porsche 911 Cabrio is parked next to a motorcycle. On the wall is some leather gear, boots and helmet. The 2nd floor has a large living room with exposed brick walls, huge flat screen, fireplace, bar, gourmet kitchen with top end stainless steel appliances and a personal office. The 3rd floor is all bedrooms with a huge master suite with large bathroom and large walk in closet. The one spare bedroom is sparsely decorated with just a bed, dresser and chair. The other bedroom is mostly empty. Itâs a great âcribâ but Iâm certain daddy helped pay for most of it.
I get to work quickly with my plans. I try to check out his studioâs computer but its password protected and I canât get it to unlock. This isnât a problem after I plug in a thumb drive with keystroke tracker and some other tricks. In a minute, I gain access to all his computers and social media accounts. The password was his usual password but backwards.
His iMac Pro is a wealth of information â full of his unedited videos, speeches and even a digital diary. I thought he stopped doing a diary in 11th grade but apparently not. He updated it just this morning before leaving. Iâm sitting there for hours reviewing his life since I left. His comments about my death and funeral are cruel to say the least. He blames me for fucking up life with my death, how mom & dad are glad itâs over and theyâre all better off. Even my father agreed with him. Thatâs fine by me, they wonât miss Will at all when I take his place.
I decide to spend the night here and continue my studying. In his basement studio there is a green screen, professional video cameras and teleprompters set up in one corner which he uses to make his cutesy videos. I turn on the equipment, click on a file and up pops the words to his last blog on the teleprompter. On another display in front of the green screen pops up the empty stool where he sits. On the stool is a remote I believe is for controlling everything. I plop my ass down, face the camera, and see myself, or Will on the display in front of me. I fuss with my hair to give me Willâs prominent cowlick, press ârecordâ and the words start moving for me to perform. âWhatâs up guys, Will Witt for Prager Uâ I repeat his performance, then delete file before passing out at 2am, after seeing his posts on landing in Washington DC.Â
LOOKING THE PART
My brother prides himself on his hair, especially the huge cowlick that heâs proud of. According to his calendar, he had a haircut a few days before leaving for Washington. I make myself at home taking a shower, and pulling on some of his clothes â dark gray skinny jeans, t-shirt, jacket and his black high top converse sneakers. Iâm missing his clunky watch and ring he wears all the time, and also his rope crystal necklace heâs been wearing since he was 15. The one time I was with one of his girlfriends, not having that necklace on, gave away my identity. I jump in Willâs Porsche and find a salon with a great google rating. I ask for my usual and show her pics from two days ago. Theyâre very close up and detailed. In half an hour, Iâm smiling at Will in the mirror, running my hand through his cowlick.Â
Back home, I pull in to the garage and before I can close the door, some pretty little thing is running over to me.Â
âWill! Hey there, Iâm glad I caught you.â
âOh hey, you caught me.â I smile and act surprise.
âTammy and I are having a party tonight.â She hands me a flyer âJen and Tamâs Big Partyâ.
âThat sounds like a blast, âJenâ.â Hoping sheâs the âJenâ on the flyer.
âI was just going to slip it in your mailbox. Thought you were going to Washington or someplace exotic again.â
âMy DC trip was postponed, so Iâm here.â I give her a typical Will smile.Â
âWashingtonâs lost is our gain. You have to come. Besides you can crawl home if you get drunk like unlike last time.â
âIâll try my best but super busy here.â I chuckle with her, not sure what sheâs referring to but Willâs diary will probably help me remember some of it. Iâd love to go but thereâll be lots of iPhones around and plenty of pics/videos posted on social media.
A friend sent me a lot of WiFi HD fiberoptic video cameras and microphones to bug my brotherâs place. I place a few in each room then sync them to my iPad. Walking from room to room I test them all for activation. It takes all day to hide them properly. Later on, Willâs latest VLOGs and antics from Washington start appearing on his desktop.Â
His video reminds me how different our styles are. Will was always conservative dresser while I went for the grunge look. His videos confirm his tastes havenât changed at all except becoming more expensive. Iâm making myself at home â itâs going to be my future home soon anyway. With my new haircut, it only takes a little of his gel to look exactly like him.
 It was always fun turning myself into Will when we were younger, itâs still a turn on now. I print out some pics from his PC files, showing various outfit heâs worn. Iâve got to nail his âlookâ perfectly for my future life. Thereâs one of him in a sharp black suit, white shirt and black tie playing a piano, with a red lapel thingy at a Prager U gala a month ago. We both took piano lesson but I was always a little better.

Itâs easy finding the outfit in his very organized closet. He took it off, left the lapel pin in and probably hasnât worn it since. Thereâs a video of the gala in his files that I watch, providing me glimpses of his shoes and watch. I strip out of his jeans, and into the outfit. I couldnât find his watch â itâs probably in Washington on him but I slip on his pinky ring and a different watch from his jewelry box. Back in the studio, I start a new file â Prager Gala, pretending that Iâm Will being interviewed about the nightâs events. I sit on the stool, hit record and adlib the event starting with Willâs signature âWhatâs up Guysâ intro, including flashing his two fingers. Being Will is all very natural for me. Iâm up half the night learning the equipment, checking out his videos and closet. I just need a few weeks of studying him before I replace him.Â
To access his cell phone, a friend puts me in contact with a local guy who clones Willâs iPhone. It costs $2000 but I now see his text messages, calendar and listen to his voicemails. I can also listen in on his calls while heâs talking to people. I canât speak to them, and they canât hear me but itâs perfect timing. With him in Washington, his entire life is going through his cell phone, providing me with up to the minute information. Heâs working on his schedule for the next few months. With access to all this, Iâm learning who his coworkers are, listening to work conference calls, what theyâre working on and what Willâs job entails as Pragerâs âsocial media influencerâ.
Will has a spare set of keys for our parentâs place so I visit just to see what changes have been made while Iâve been gone. The most obvious change is the lack of pictures of me. Their mantel has no pics of Will and I together. It almost looks like they have only one son â that I never existed. Everything else is pretty much how it was three years ago. As I was leaving, Mrs. Tarantolo, their neighbor sees âWillâ and comes running over to say hello. She thought it was sweet I was keeping an eye on their place while they were away âSuch a good son.â She claims to be my biggest fan and hasnât missed any of my videos. Sheâs clueless about me, as she should â when even our parents couldnât tell the difference, Iâm not worried about anyone.Â
My week consists of listening, watching and reading everything heâs up to. I take his Porsche out to grab lunch or dinner to remote places so Iâm not seen by anyone that could know him. A few times, fans mistake me for Will and I sign autographs using âWhatâs Up Guysâ. Theyâre thrilled and its harmless fun for me. Â
The week flies by and I return to my apartment across the road. I return the spare condo key to the manager after making a duplicate of it. On schedule, Will returns via LAX shuttle service. My surveillance system works perfectly as he moves around his condo. I see him taking a shower, changing into sweats and working in his studio. His buddy Mike arrives later with pizza and they brainstorm in the studio about their next VLOG and âman in the streetâ topics. Listening to their banter helps me learn the lingo and their personal relationship.
Will has not changed a bit since I left Los Angeles â same old anal retentive asshole. Itâs fun watching and learning about him. Heâs still an avid runner, and like clockwork, he does five miles around a nearby park most mornings. Prager U is just a few miles away and heâs there daily unless heâs traveling. He has a new girlfriend he casually hooks up with but itâs not serious, so thatâll be easy. He writes about meeting her in his diary. Heâs got his work schedule planned for the next few months and I know enough to handle it. After a few weeks, my gut is telling me Iâm ready to be Will Witt.Â
Willâs next major trip is to London for a scheduled Turning Point USA promotion/MOTS and speech at Oxford University â same as he did at Stanford. My plan is to replace him when he arrives home. This gives me another 10 days to get up to speed with his life. I watch him pack, see LAX shuttle service pick him up and confirm his plane took off as scheduled. I make myself at home but keep a low profile, rarely going out.Â
Between his phone and computer, Iâm kept busy 24 hours/day just keeping up with his life. Heâs definitely a video freak, not only recording content for Prager but also everything else like his hotel room, what he had for breakfast, his shopping excursions. I canât wait to wear his new $7000 bespoke suit he purchased during his shopping expedition on Saville Row. I listen in on his phone calls with our parents, his friends and girlfriend Lisa. This helps me get up to speed with whatâs going on in his life. Mom & Dad meet Will for lunch at his hotel, then go to see Hamilton. Thereâs plenty of selfies and videos to make his life mine. Heâs spending a fortune on food, wine, clothes, cigars and trinkets.Â
A few hours before he returns, Iâm armed with chloroform, truth serum and various knock out drugs. I hide in his bedroom, ready to pounce with a heavily soaked rag of chloroform. Itâs almost enough to knock me out just holding it.Â
HONEY IâM HOME
The door lock jiggles and Will enters, plopping his luggage inside the door. He makes a beeline to kitchen and opens the refrigerator. Heâs there quite a while before I hear him dragging his very large suitcases up the stairs. Iâm crotched in the corner, behind the door as he struggles to get both bags through. The perfect moment happens when one of the bags get stuck in the door jam and I hear him say âfuckâ. In a split second, I pounce and have the chloroform soaked rag over his nose and mouth. A split second after that, he almost falls to the floor as I catch him. I drag him out into the hallway, and finish putting his bags in the bedroom.
âWelcome home Will, have a good trip?â I look down at him passed out and ask.
âAwesome trip man, had fun with the TP USA team, saw Hamilton with the parents, and hit up lots of pubs and cigars. Iâll have to show you all the pics I took.â I respond to myself in Willâs typical enthusiastic lingo. Â
I drag Will to the empty bedroom and start stripping him. Of course, heâs in a sport coat and tie to travel. Itâs so âWillâ I think as I carefully remove everything from him, amazed at how alike we still are. I strip off my old sweat pants and t-shirt and put them on him. I pull him up into a metal chair I anchored to the floor, then handcuff his hands and feet so he canât move an inch. I kneel down next to him, grab his face, then rotate it side to side to check his appearance close up. My sideburns are about a quarter inch too long so I head to my bathroom and trim them to match exactly.Â
 I carry âmyâ clothes back to my new bedroom and slowly start my transformation into Will. I love pulling on the outfit heâs been wearing all dayâhis sweat and scents mixing with mine. Everything is still warm as I put on his black briefs and socks. His charcoal dress pants fit perfectly as I pull them up. His shirt has gunmetal gray cufflinks and is monogrammed on the sleeve with our initials âWCWâ. I pulled the black lace up shoes off his feet without untying them. I wiggle into them, tuck in my shirt and fasten my belt. In the bathroom mirror I put on his tie using the same technique dad taught both of us. I pull on his cool black sport coat with large dark gray plaid patterns. Thereâs a video of him wearing this outfit for red carpet Oscar interviews. I check his breast pockets, locating his iPhone, keys and wallet. Tucked inside an outside pocket are his glasses. Slipping on his ring, leather wrist band and watch completes my transformation into Will Witt. I adjust my hair using his Cremo hair creamâWill is always fussing with his hair. Staring in the mirror, I only see Will Witt, just as he was traveling first class earlier. I grin at myself as I adjust my shirt cuffs and admire my looks. I do his usual MOTS intro flawlessly â âWhatâs Up Guysâ. From this moment on, Iâm Will Witt and no one will have a clue Iâm not.Â

My iPhone buzzes in my suit pocket, itâs Willâs girlfriend, Lisa calling.Â
âHey Lisa, I just got in the door babe.â I answer watching myself in the mirror, smiling and playing Will flawlessly.
âI thought you would be, Iâve missed you so much Will.â She whispers seductively.
âSame, may I take you out for dinner?â I ask as charmingly as Will does, remembering their conversation from a day ago, and Will promising dinner and a surprise.
âI would love that.â
âGreat, Iâll pick you up at 7, Letâs dress up and go someplace nice. Iâll wear a suit and tie.â This gives me the afternoon to get settled into my new life.Â
âOkay Will, canât wait.â
âBye Babe.â Willâs cutesy name he uses for all his girlfriends.
âItâs show timeâ I think to myself. I head back to my brother whoâs finally starting to stir from the chloroform. I start slapping his face and he becomes more aware.
âWake up Willy, Willy wake up.â I say playfully.Â
He looks confused, slowly recognizing me, his eyes bug out, then starts to struggle. âBut youâre dead?â
âRumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. Donât struggle bro, youâll only hurt yourself.â I laugh at him.
âWhatâs going on Willy? Why are you in my clothes?â
âFrom now on, please call me Will and theyâre now my clothes. I just got back from London and Iâm really jet lagged.â I stand proudly, straighten my tie then reach into my breast pocket for my new wallet.
âAsshole, what do you think youâre doing?â he yells and gets pissed as heâs now fully awake.
âWell, remember when you planted drugs in my locker, turned me into the school principle and ruined my life?â
âYeah, that was a good one! They all bought it too. Got rid of you for good.â He laughs.
 âWell, laugh all you want. Iâm borrowing your life.â
âYouâll never get away with this. Whatever you are planning, wonât work.â He predicts.
âWell Iâm taking Lisa out to dinner tonight to celebrate my return. In other words, I need pussy but Will doesnât talk like that. Let me rephrase it â Iâm taking my girlfriend out for dinner and hopefully make love to her. Better?â I leaf through my wallet checking it out, pulling out the debit card. âBro, is your PIN still 8991? I may need some cash for my date. You only have a $40 in here.â
By the look on his face, I know he never changed is PIN. âThanks bro, just needed to confirm that.âÂ
âSheâll know youâre not me, donât even try it.â
âBro, youâre talking to the guy who fooled all your girlfriends in high school. Youâve been dating her for what? About 6 weeks after meeting her at Jenâs last party where you got wasted and donât remember getting home.â
âYouâve been reading my private diary?âÂ
âWell, you could say itâs my diary. So, I was just reviewing my life for the past few years.â I laugh at him. âWhich brings me to a new issue â where should I take her for dinner, and do afterwards?â
âFuck yourself.â He yells.
âBro, Iâm hoping to fuck her, not myself. You donât want me to do something brash, âunWill likeâ and ruin your relationship do you? I bet she doesnât even know you have a twin brother, am I right?â I laugh at him.Â
âWilly, what are you doing? Just untie me and Iâll forget this ever happened. I promise.â Trying to soften me up.
âLetâs get this straight, for the time being, Iâm Will Witt, youâre nothing, donât call me that again.â I yell at him. âNow, youâre going to help me be you or Iâm going to really fuck up your life. You know I can do it. If you lie to me, there will be repercussions. Do not test me.â
âOkay.â He responds defeated.
âOkay, what?â I demand.
âOkay Will. Lisa loves Italian and thereâs this little family owned restaurant called âPapa Joeâsâ near her house. She loves it and so do I. Thatâs where I was planning on taking her tonight. I always get the âLombardoâ dish with an ice tea of course.â He answers defeated.Â
âThatâs good information bro, I really appreciate that.â I watch his face and have always been able to tell when he was lying. âWhat after that? What are her limits? I need everything to be you with her. Give me the full history.â
He proceeds to tell me everything I need to know about Lisa â at least I hope so.Â
âNow I need details about my job. I know where you work, and what you do but more details about the people, office layout, where your office is and how I get in?â He gives me looks that could kill. âWhatâs up guys?â I mock him with his catch phrase.Â
âMy work ID badge gives me complete access anytime. Itâs in the front pocket of my backpack. I have an office on the second floor, just left as you get out of the elevator. My name is on the door. You canât miss it.â
âWhat do you do when you first get there, in the morning? Routine? Pals? Coffee? conference room? Where do you go for lunch? I need it all Willy. You donât want me to mess up your perfect little life, do you?â I subtly threaten him.
Once I pump him for everything, I grab the bag from the corner, pull out a needle and inject him. He screams at me for about two minutes then become docile. I walk him to the bathroom and order him to relieve himself. Once secured back in his chair, I give him dose of Midazolam that will keep him out for 12 hours and put a ball gag in his mouth. I shut and lock the bedroom door, head back to my master bedroom finishing my unpacking.Â
I slip easily into Willâs routine. My shirts and suits will go to my cleaner per the receipts in the Porsche, the rest go into the washer. Carefully tucked inside his luggage is his new Saville Row Huntsman, a few new dress shirts and the Big Ben charm I bought Lisa in London. I canât help but try on the new suit, admiring the fit and material. I head downstairs and see Willâs work backpack he has with him all the time. I take it down to the studio office and start going through the contentâŚ. A few cameras, my passport, iPad and MacBook Pro. Thereâs a printout of my next Prager assignments and hand notes he made in the margins. I find his work ID, clip it to my suit, repack his backpack and head to the office.Â
A DAY IN THE LIFE
Iâve followed Will to Prager U but have never stepped foot inside. I pull into an empty parking lot, and park in his assigned spot. Will says no one is ever there but he sometimes goes in to get a jump on Monday. My ID badge opens the main door. I easily find his office and make myself at home. On the wall I notice the signed photograph of Reagan that dad treasures and wonder how Will has it. I plop my backpack on the chair next to my desk and start exploring. I open my MacBook and it starts syncing with the LAN. I easily log in and upload my videos as Will does after all his events, according to his logs. Â
I explore the entire building and everything is as he described â Bossâ office, video production, media center, studio, executive conference room etc. I confidently walk around taking in the names of my coworkers. In the menâs room, I smile at Will in the mirror and clean out my coffee mug.Â
Back in the office, I settle into my desk and go thru my drawers, check my work email and respond to some. I hear someone coming up the stairs, calling my new name, approaching my office. I recognize it immediately as Willâs producer and friend â Mike.
âIn here.â I yell out to him.
He pops his head around the corner. âWelcome back, how was your flight?â
âUneventful, good to be home but jet lag.â I casually answer.
âMy flight yesterday was delayed an hour from Chicago but not too bad.â
I heard their last conversation before Will took off this am, and continued it. âIâm good with the final edits from MOTS, just uploaded it so Alexander can add the graphics.âÂ
I pull up the video, knowing Will made a few cuts on the flight over, and show it to him. Â
âYouâve been busy man, looks great. You want to grab lunch?âÂ
âSure, you drive and pick.â I canât resist the thought of testing my âWill skillsâ.Â
Mike takes me to âIn & Outâ for burgers. He doesnât suspect a thing, readily accepting me as his friend and coworker. We talk about the trip, work and future trips. I feel as if I was actually there. He drops me off and I head back to my office and continue to familiarize myself with everything for a few more hours.Â
My big test will be âmyâ girlfriend Lisa. I stay in Willâs slick outfit, donning his favorite Ray-Bans for the drive. Sheâs waiting for me outside and jumps into my car. Her unexpected full tongue kiss surprises me but I quickly adjust and give her full tongue back. We make out for a minute then I take her to Papa Joeâs. Will was telling the truth, Lisa lights up as I pull in front and valet the Porsche. I use my brotherâs pics, diary, blogs and text messages to talk about my London trip. When desert comes, I spring the Big Ben charm on her. She leans in tenderly, kisses me deeply and invites me to spend the night.Â
At her place, we strip and jump right into bed. In minutes, sheâs moaning as I work her pussy, slowly penetrating it with the tip of my head. She starts moaning softly âoh Will, oohhh Willâ making me harder, pushing deeper into her as she climaxes. I explode in her, then collapse onto my back as she curls up under my arm and we fall to sleep. She wakes me up with a blow job and homemade pancakes â Willâs favorite she notes. Iâm not a big pancake fan but eat them eagerly as Will would. Iâve replaced Will completely and now have his sexy girlfriend.Â
DAY TWO
I check on Willy when I get home and heâs starting to stir. My schedule today calls for video editing at Prager U with Gavi and Mike. I take a quick shower put on an outfit that screams âpreppy conservativeâ â which isnât difficult as thatâs all Will has in his closet, making my job easy.Â
I pop my head in to the bedroom and see that heâs wide awake.
âMorning sunshine.â I cheerfully say.
âLet me the fuck out of these straps now!â he mumbles as I remove the ballgag.
âSure thing, but first a little shot so you can take a dump and eat a little something. Hungry?â
âNo, donât drug me, itâs a fucking weird feeling.â He pleas.
âSorry man, I canât chance you getting free and having a fake Will running around.â
âYouâre the fake Will, ass wipe.â He screams.
âHmmm Lisa and Mike didnât think so. I ran into Mike in the office yesterday while uploading my latest VLOG and MOTS video, then had lunch with him. Heâs a good friend of mine. Oh, and Lisa⌠Damn did I hit her sweet spot last night as she moaned my name softly in my ears. She really loved the Big Ben charm I got her and the âBig Willâ I gave her. I think Iâm in love bro.â I grab my crotch so he knows what Iâm talking about.Â
âYou fucking bastard!! Fucking asshole!! Youâll be caught. You canât slip into my life that easily.â He screams.
âNow, now, Willy. Guess you didnât notice the video and audio bugs I installed throughout my new condo or the keystroke tracker on your computers. Iâve been catching up with you since Stanford. Your condo manager was gracious enough to give me a key after you lost it.â I run and grab my iPad and play some of the videos for him, then I show him the cloned phone and play his last conversation with Mike.Â
âGuess I donât need this cloned phone any longer. I have to admit, youâre quite the busy person. Your phone never stops ringing and beeping but donât worry, Iâm keeping up.â
âFuck you Willy! When I get free, youâre going to jail or worst.â
âIf you get free, which I doubt. If you havenât noticed, youâre bolted to the floor. Oh, donât worry, Iâll have new carpet installed at some point. Nice thing bro â between my bank account and yours, Iâm quite wealthy with a lot of future potential. In fact, after this gig, Iâm thinking of running for office. Dad would love it and back me financially.â
He mutters. âFucker.â
âHey bro, donât worry, Iâm taking good care of your life. Enjoying it immensely, especially Lisa. She really knows how to wake me up but Iâm not big on the pancakes.â
He thrashes back and forth in the chair screaming more obscenities at me.
 âBro, seriously, how do I look? Do you approve my work outfit? Iâve noticed this sport coat is one of your favorites. Oh, and my new suit from London fits great and feels incredible. I just had to try it on.â I taunt him while adjusting my shirt sleeves and checking my watch.
âWhat are you doing here?â he quietly demands.
âWell the drug career pays quite well but is extremely dangerous. After seeing you at Stanford, I decided a career change was necessary. Donât you agree itâs a good career move?â
âYouâll never fool them for long. There are things only I could know. Youâll tripped up. What about mom and dad?â
âAre you serious?â I laugh out loud. âMom and dad could never tell us apart, you know that. I did visit the house while you were in London and from the pictures displayed, it looks like I, Will, am an only child. Theyâre the least of my worries.â
âOh, theyâll know youâre not me.â
âWhy would they? Just look at me bro. I was always a better you than you, when I wanted to be. I do have to get fully up to speed with my new life, friends and girlfriend but thatâs what all my new drugs are for. I kind of like your style so Iâll only wear what you already have in your closet. Iâm enjoying your preppy style. I think Iâm rocking the Will look, you have to admit it.â I tug on my sleeves not interested in his rants.
âWhat about work?â He counters.
âOh bro, thatâll be easy too. Iâve watched all your videos â the work and personal, edited and unedited. I taught myself iMovie to edit my MOTSs for uploading. Iâve seen you brainstorm with Mike on MOTS topics and question. Itâs amazing how we even think alike politically. Iâm ahead of schedule for today. Like the anal person you are, I was in the office all afternoon while you were sleeping. I cleaned out my scummy coffee mug, organized my desk and left a note for Alexander on the graphics Iâd like to see before the end of today. I canât wait to meet the boss, have been a fan of his for years.â
âYou canât be me!â He slumps his shoulder in deeper defeat.Â
âI am you, no one will have a clue Iâm not.âÂ
I inject him with truth serum and a powerful muscle relaxer. By the time I come back with breakfast, heâs docile and defeated. A few protein bars, quick trip to bathroom and heâs safely secured again. The truth serum is remarkable. I have a totally different discussion with him.
âHey bro, how do I look? You like?â I spin around to model my outfit.
âIâve worn that exact outfit before I think.â
âThank you, now see, it wasnât too hard to be nice, now was it?â
He spills his guts to me about all his coworkers, and what he thinks of them. While heâs drugged, I hit him up on family issues and his feelings towards me. He basically threatens to kill me and will since Iâm already dead. Itâs been on his mind since he woke up chained to the chair. I snicker to myself, knowing heâs the one whoâs days are numbered. Itâs almost time for work today, so I knock him out for another 12 hours.
My first day of work is a breeze. I visit Alexander and review the graphics I want. Mike and I review the schedule and brainstorm future MOTSs and VLOGs. Will has the easy part and probably makes the most money. Pragerâs staff writes his MOTS questions and helps him with upcoming speeches. He provides the topic, they handle it from there. Will was good enough to do my outline for his University of Texas speech next week. I turn them in and talk to Marissa, our content producer. I have the best gig â I just need to be the hip preppy conservative face of Prager U and get to travel all around the world.Â
When Iâm leaving Marrisaâs office, I run into Dennis Prager, the president of Prager University. He puts his arm around me and leads me back to his office.
âWill, good to see you, how was London? I just saw your rough video and itâs greatâ
âThank you, Mr. Prager. London was great.â I respond and his face immediately looks puzzled.
âSince when am I Mr. Prager?â
âDennis, sorry it just came out. Iâm still out of sorts with jet lag and the British are so formal.â I try to recover.
âI understand boy, plus you probably had too much wine and cigars Iâm sure.â
âI sure did. I brought a few Charatan Robustos back with meâ I chuckle knowing their conversations about them and using them to solidify my identity.
âAnd youâre not sharing? Will, Will, Will, how could you?âÂ
âIâll bring them in tomorrow.âÂ
âLetâs grab lunch son.âÂ
I canât believe Iâm having lunch with Dennis Prager. Heâs thrilled with âmyâ work, wants me to do more TV appearances like Fox & Friends but also liberal networks. My ratings are through the roof. I talk about my London trip, showing him pics of my parents and selfies I took. We talk politics, going back and forth on issues. We get back to the office and I easily fit in and learn the ropes. By the end of the day, Iâm very pleased with my new life. I pass on happy hour claiming Iâm still of out sorts due to jet lag.Â
CHECKING IN
Back home I check Willy. Heâs awake but groggy.
âWhatâs up guy? How was your day?â I ask cockily as I strut in.
âHow do you think, you sick fuck.â
âSo sorry to hear that. My day was awesome. My latest VLOG and MOTS are killing it. I had lunch with my friend Dennis and he wants me to do more TV spots. It was probably the best day of your life, I mean my life.â
âMy life! You fucker, my life.â He screams with pure rage.
âWow bro, you smell. Weâll have to get you a shower but first I need to change. Be right back.â
I run to my closet and throw on a pair of running shorts and a Prager t-shirt. I keep my cell phone on me as itâs been going off all day. When I get back to Willy, he starts yelling at me.
âWhat are you up to? Did you get me fired? The truth, you owe me that at least.â
I laugh. âNow why would I mess up my career bro?â
âItâs my life and career. Youâre going to pay for this you fucking asshole.â He continues to rant.Â
âIâve had enough of you already.â I grab the ball gag, shove it in his mouth and he starts thrashing again. My phone rings, itâs Mike calling.
âHey Mike, Whatâs up?â Willyâs eye light up watching me.
âNo, Iâm fine, it was just jetlag and you know meâŚI tried all the beers and cigars in the pubsâŚYeah buddyâŚthanks for your concern.â I hang up and look at Willy. âHey that Jetlag excuse will be good for another few days till I get the groove completely.â
He starts mumbling again but the phone rings again with Lisa calling.Â
âHey babe, how was your day?â I sincerely ask. Willy starts squirming and getting louder.Â
âHey babe, hang on, Iâve got my producer calling.â I put her on hold, walk over to Willy and gut punch him with all my force. I impale him and he shuts up.
âSorry babe, did I thank you for last night?...Oh yeah, Iâd love to but Iâve got a lot to catch up withâŚMy parents are coming back Wednesday from their European vacation and weâre suppose to do dinner Thursday? Would love for you to meet themâŚ.Okay⌠love ya.âÂ
âBro, see how easy this gig is for me? I still need you for some additional information like the combination to the safe in your office.â He stares at me but is keeping quiet. I grab my little box of drugs and mellow Willy out. A quick shower, shit and change of clothes and heâs back in his chair. I feed him a sub and water that he quickly inhales.Â
âNow Willy, whatâs the number to my safe?â
âGo fuck yourself.â he mumbles.
âWilly, you know I could give you some truth serum or beat it out of you.â
â17858â he spits out as in disgust.Â
I head down to his safe and open it up. Inside is a gun, his birth certificate, social security card, and a stack of other seemingly important papers. I grab it all and take head up to review with Willy.
âNice Glock Willy, letâs review whatâs in my safe and why itâs there. Some quality bonding time. Most of this I know but the rest?â I ask nicely.
âMy contract with Prager U, noncompete, mom & dadâs will, my will, some stocks dad gave me.â
I leaf through it, reading it all and ignoring Willy. In between docs, I feed him some granola bars from the kitchen. I play with the unloaded gun in front of him, on purpose. Iâll have a use for it soon.
âOk brother, more work questions. Thereâs âPR shotsâ on calendar for tomorrow afternoon. Whatâs with that?â
âJoel, our CMO set them up. Itâs just âglamourâ pics for his new marketing campaign.â
âOh, so thatâs what my new suit is for Iâm guessing. The email to Joel saying youâre all set after you bought it?â
âYeah, please donât fuck things up for me Willy. Iâve worked hard this past year.â
âHow many times do I have to tell you? Iâm Will.â I gut punch him again.
âIâm sorry Will.â He cries in pain.
âThatâs better Willy. So, tell me what to expect.â
âEasy, take suit to work, some of my shirts, ties and jewelry. Collette in our makeup will take care of the rest. Just smile and do what they tell you in front of the camera.â he answers, still in pain.
âShoes?â
âThe black derbies I had on yesterday, I bought for shoot specifically, wanted them broken in. Doesnât matter though â they only shoot from waist up.â
âNow thatâs more like it. Donât fight me, help me so I donât fuck up your life.â as if heâs ever getting it back, I think to myself.Â
âYes Will.â
HANGING WITH FRIENDS
âNow, my friend Tommy wants to go out tonight, grab dinner. What would âWillâ do?âÂ
âHe wants to do 71Above â itâs the highest restaurant west of the Mississippi. Tricia, his friend is host there and can get us in. Very high end, suit and tie required.â
âThat sounds great.â
âYeah, heâs picking me up, Iâm paying.â
âIâm paying!â I correct him. âWhat were you going to wear?â
âThereâs a black Tom Ford suit with a red lapel pin on it, Iâve only worn it once for a few hours. White shirt and any tie.â
âOh yes, my outfit from the Prager gala where I played âblue moonâ on the piano. What tie, what shirt?â I demand.
He looks at me shocked. âThereâs a new gold paisley tie, white spread collar shirt with cufflinks.â
âWhy thank you brother. I better go and get ready.â I shove another granola bar in his mouth.
I easily assemble the outfit he was going to wear. After all my spying, Iâm sure I would have selected something as tasteful. I skip the gold paisley and decide on a âmen in blackâ look, almost exactly as he had on at the gala. A quick shower, 20 minutes with my hair and another 20 to dress and Iâm still 36 minutes early for Tommy.
âHow do I look Willy? Now be honest.â I ask walking into the bedroom.
He checks me out head to toe. âYou look good Will. Youâre wearing my good watch?â
âMy good watch brother, remember? You wore your smaller ring at the gala but I stuck with what I had on coming back from London. I think I looks great. Went with the gold black onyx cufflinks. And dude I even had my name embossed inside the suit, sweet!â I open up my jacket.
âYouâve been watching my videos.â He realizes.
âOf course, and reading your diary, all the way back to when dad drove me to âNew Startsâ and abandoned me. Iâm good Willy, been watching you for a month.â
Just then my phone rings in breast pocket. I pull it out and see itâs Tommy.
âNow keep quiet Willy or you know whatâll happen.â I warn him as I answer. âWhatâs up Tommy? On your wayâŚyeah early is good, Iâm ready⌠Okay, that sounds good, see you soon.â
âPlease donât drug me bro, Iâll be quiet, I promise.â
âSorry Willy, canât take any chances. Besides, Tommy mentioned about having a drink when he gets here. Sounds like itâs routine for you guys. What does he drink?â
âRum and Coke, lots in the fridge just for him.â
I grab the knock out needle and give him a dose. He doesnât fight me at all.
âWhy thank you bro. Iâll see you later tonight maybe, if youâre awake.â I laugh as I leave and lock the door.Â
Tommy walks in without knocking, making his way to my bar as I make my way down the stairs. He sees me and lifts the glasses.
âThe usual?âÂ
âSure, sounds good to me.â heâs right at home, grabbing the rum and coke.
âCheers!â he hands me one, we clink glasses and swig.
I follow Tommyâs lead the entire evening but I know enough about Will to discuss his trip, girlfriend and work. Tommy talks about his auditions for a few movies and a commercial. Sadly for him, Iâm a bigger celebrity than he is, as a few people ask for my autograph while waiting to be seated. Tricia has seats for us right next to the window with the best view of LA. It a fun night as a few of Triciaâs friends join us. Itâs easy playing Will and his friends. I have everything put on my tab. Thank god he has an early audition for a new Marvel movie, so we leave and Iâm home by midnight.Â
MORE WORK
Iâm up early but Willy is out cold still. He looks like death, probably from all the injections and being upright on the chair for days. Not that I really care as it gives me more âWill Timeâ. To keep in character, I put on some of his work out gear, grab my iPod and do my usual run around the park. I work up quite the sweat but it probably helps with all the alcohol Tommy and I consumed. I check on Willy and heâs now awake and not happy. A quick injection allows me to get him relieved and toss him in the shower. Heâs not putting up any resistance so I give him breakfast, leave him in the tub but making sure to securely handcuff him to a grip bar. I take my morning shower in the same shower so I can keep an eye on him.
Willy is so beaten that heâs stopped resisting completely and is cooperative even. Believing that by helping me, Iâll get what I want from him and leave him to his old life. What heâs doing is sealing his fate faster. Once I no longer need him, weâll head up to my parentâs cabin in the mountains and heâll be fertilizer.Â
After I towel off, I sit on the toilet seat next to Willy.
âHow you feeling Willy?â I ask trying to sound concerned.
âPlease Will, can I stay here in the tub all day? I promise Iâll be good.â
âI think I can do that but you have to be knocked out. But sure thing. Tommy is a fun guy bro. He sure loves his rum & cokes. We had a blast. I think he was hurt that women were coming up to me for my autograph but not him.â
âYeah, thatâs happened before when weâre out.â He looks really down.
âWhat is it bro? you look sad.â
âWhat do you think? Iâm chained up and I canât believe people are falling for your act.â he gets a little feisty.
âCome on bro, how could they not think I was anybody but Will Witt? Donât worry, no one suspects a thing, so weâre good but I need your help with todayâs schedule â sorta of âwhat would Will doâ session just to make sure I donât fuck anything up for you. Okay?â
âSure Will, itâs what I live for.â he responds sarcastically.
âHow do you come up with the topics for your MOTSs?âÂ
âWho do you think? Dad, you know how opinionated he is. When we had dinner in London, he rattled off six topics for me to cover and things heâd ask these snowflakes.â
âAh I thought you sounded a lot like dad when interviewing people. That explains the notes on your iPad. By the way, Iâm having dinner with the rents Friday night, having them meet Lisa.â I just smile at him. âNow about todayâs pics, what should I wear? âWhat would Will wearâ?â
âWeâve been through this â my new bespoke suit.â
âExactly what youâd wear today â into the office and for the shoot. Iâm just trying to help you Willy.â
âDennis is always pushing for me in more suits and ties, to be taken more seriously outside the campus forum. Keep it simple â black button down shirt, my charcoal brooks brothers suit. For the shoot, the bespoke of course and take all my new dress shirts and ties, many pairs of cufflinks. I love my gold paisley tie, the one you wore last night. Hopefully you didnât ruin it.â
��No, I went with a black tie, so the paisley is fine.â
âThereâs a large suit bag in the back of my closet that can hold everything youâll need.â
âI have to tell you bro, Iâm gaining a real appreciation for your closet. My tastes have really matured in the past months. Whatâs with the glasses though?â
âTheyâre for eye strain bro, giving my eyes a break now from the contact lenses. I also wear them for important interviews or meetings where I want to look more mature and smarter.â
âWell your glasses and contacts work great for me too. My eyes have been changing but I never had them checked. Now, what about the shoot? Whoâs going to be there? How does it work? What does Will do?â I press him.
âItâs a larger version of my down stair studio. Someone will come get me when itâs my turn, take me to changing room, then make up, then to the set â green screen. Itâs easy really. Thereâll be people in and out all day long.â
âPeople like who?â
âCandace, Charlie Kirk, Dave Rubin, Guy Benson and many others. Itâll be a few days of craziness.â
âNice! Do I have any nicknames or personal things with any of them? Like, how do you address Candace? or Charlie?â He stutters and hesitates. âSpill it or more drugs. Besides, you donât want me to fuck up anything with your friends now do you?â
âCandace is âCandyâ jokingly, sheâs getting married in a few weeks.â He continues with the others. Iâll use the information but it sounds childish â something a more mature, evolving Will would never use. Iâll phase that nonsense out.Â
âGood to know. Thanks. Iâve got to get ready for work.â I grin at him.
Dennis Prager alluded to my evolving image during lunch and that I should be wearing more conservative outfits. I agree completely with the boss and love the image. With that in mind, I ignore Willyâs suggestion and go ultra conservative. I remember a beautiful light blue shirt with white contrasting collar and cuffs that âIâveâ worn a few times. It would be ultra conservative with my gray Brooks.Â
In Will fashion, I lay out my work outfit on the bed, adding all the details. When Iâm satisfied, I pull it on my underwear and socks, pull on my pants. After I add the belt, I pull on the Brooks shirt. To keep with the Brooks theme, as Will likes to do, I select the Brooks tie that he wore previously. The whole image screams ultra conservative and looks great. I add white gold cufflinks, his smaller ring and gold watch. I pull on the jacket and stare at myself in the mirror. I put some gel in my hair then fix it exactly as in the pic I found in an old MOTS video. Oh, almost forgot my tie clip. Heâs famous on Instagram for his tie clips? I clip one on and it completes my image. I flash a Will smile and fingers. âWhatâs Up Guys?â.Â
I must have nailed the look because when I entered the toilet, Willyâs mouth dropped. In the bathroom mirror, I admire myself, tug on my cuffs and adjust my tie. I donât say a word.
âWell arenât you Will Witt.â He comments snidely but I ignore him for a few more minutes as I run my hand thru my hair.
âWho else would I be?â I turn around to face him. âWhatâs Up Guys, Will Witt for Prager U.â flash my peace sign to him, pretending Iâm holding a microphone.
âProbably a better choice for today. No pocket square Will?âÂ
âOh shit, totally didnât notice.â
âIn drawer under jewelry box.â He answers me without even asking. I run to his closet, find a nice silk white one neatly folded in a square. I tuck it in my suit pocket and check myself out in the mirror quickly.
âBetter?â Heâs silent.
I pull out his preppy glasses and put on and off. âGlasses, no glasses?â I look at him.
âI donât care, up to you.âÂ
âKnow what, think Iâll have pics taken both ways. I think they make me look older, which would kill my âfrat boyâ image on college campuses but might help me with the older generation.â I turn to look at his expression but he looks broken. âI love this suit bro, it fits me great. I made sure the knot was right by noting the length of the tie, and location of stripes. Not used to wearing one, almost forgot the tie clip â my fans would have blown up over such a faux pas.â
âTrue, they watch everything I post.â
âOk bro, I need to get to work, busy day ahead. Iâll probably be late tonight because Mike wants to do Furleyâs for happy hour. Iâll let you in the bathtub so youâre comfortable but how about something to help you sleep?â
âNo donât do that please, Iâll be good.â He begs.
I ignore him, grab the needle and knock him out for the day.Â
I jump in my 911 and head in for another day in the life of Will Witt. The suit bag weighs about 30lbs and takes up the entire seat of my 911. Everyone accepts me and I keep learning more and more. The lingo is coming naturally to me. The routine of emails, small talk and understanding my role is easy.Â
I hang my suit bag and jacket on the back of my office door, grab my coffee mug and ease into the day. Just before lunch, Nicki, one of the film staff comes for me â itâs my turn. Iâm seated in in one of the dressing rooms, in a makeup chair, in front of the mirror. Collette comes in all smiles.Â
âWill, youâre looking great.â
âYou too, so letâs get started. Iâve got a lot to do today on top of these pics.â
âThereâs something weâd like to do different this time.â
âOh yeah? That sounds ominous.â
âWell, how about we cut your hair some?â
âOh, I donât know about that Collette, itâs my signature, my âconservative with the best hairâ.â Sounding uncertain for effect.
âWell, I was talking to Dennis and Joel, and we feel you should be the focus, not your hair. Weâre not talking about shaving your head, just toning down the cowlick some. If you donât like, itâll be back in a few months.â
I think about it for a minute, running my hand through my cowlick, looking at Will in the mirror. Iâve seen videos where the wind destroys his giant flop, part of his gig but in the end, I nod in approval and let Prager U redo my image.Â
The âWillâ PR shoot was so simple, but time consuming. They brought in some famous stylist from West Hollywood to cut my hair â it took an hour! They went through my suit bag and laid out a number of outfits but didnât question my taste. They took multiple pics of me in 5 different outfits including what I wore in this morning. I was there for hours. At the end of the day, we head to Furleyâs as planned for happy hour. I left on my new suit and last outfit I was photographed in. What a happy hour â hanging with Charlie Kirk, Ben Shapiro and other famous conservatives was incredible. Thanks to Willâs unedited interview videos, I knew exactly what small talk he had with a number of these conservative celebrities and played them perfectly.Â
When I get home, my first stop is to taunt Willy still tied up in bathtub.
âHey bro, this suit is simply amazing. You were right, the shoot was really easy, except for having to change every 20 minutes. Like my haircut?â I tease
âWhat did you do to my hair?âÂ
âWilly, remember, itâs my hair. Itâs a shorter, more mature, conservative cut. Everyone loves it. I still have the best hair of any conservative. I texted it to mom and she loves it too.â I open up the iPhone and scroll thru pics from the shoot, then laugh and leave to change into sweats. Following the same routine, I inject Willy, help him to bathroom, feed him and put him to bed. In just a few days, heâs totally changed from being in control to being dependent. Heâs definitely a shadow of himself but Iâm now casting his shadow.
Every day as Will gets easier as I seamlessly take over his life. Iâm sure Iâve slipped up a few times but since no one knows Will has a twin, who would suspect me? Wednesday at work was incredible. I helped with the rest of the PR shoot, chatted with all of my new conservative friends. I especially liked talking to Dave Rubin and Candace Owens. I had dinner with everyone that evening and it went really late. By the time I got home, Willy had wetted himself. I was so pissed that I shoved a hot pocket in his mouth, hosed him off and drugged him heavily.Â
On Thursday Gavi and I do a man on the street, at Santa Monica Pier. I nailed it â quickly picking up Willâs attitude and methods. It was easy after watching all his videos from the past year. Back in the office I sit down with Gavi, edit his video and work with Alexander to add the graphics. Â
Willy is awake when I get home. His eyes scan me from top to bottom then he starts yelling through the ball gag.
âHang on Willy.â I pop out the ball gag.
âI hate you Willy and Iâm done playing your game.â He spits and hits me on my shorts.Â
I gut punch him with all my force, then inject him to keep him docile. âNow Willy, weâll get you on the potty and fed quickly. I donât have a lot of time, Lisa and I are going to dinner at mom and dadâs. I really like her.â
I get Willy settled, take a quick shower and head out to pick up Lisa. Dinner is a breeze as Lisa is the center of attention. Thereâs no discussion of Willy at all â just about me and how proud they are of everything Iâm doing. As I expected, they were totally clueless I wasnât their precious little Will. I have to admit, it felt great being home. I showed Lisa my old bedroom and got a BJ on Willâs bed. It was like old times, like his other girlfriends I fooled. Mom and dad announced theyâre heading to Hawaii to celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary and ask me to watch the house while theyâre gone. More time to get reacquainted with my new life as their loving son Will. I spend the night at Lisaâs but get up early to take care of things at home, then work.
Willy is awake and pissed more when I check in on him.Â
âMorning Willy.â I cheerfully announce.
âYouâre Willy asswipe.â He yells back.
I gut punch him with all my force. âDonât make me repeat myself Willy, now who am I?â
âYouâre Will, Will Witt.â Heâs barely able to speak, I hit him so hard.
âNow thatâs much better Willy. Letâs get you to the bathroom and fed.â I inject him and continue talking while it takes effect.
âSo, mom and dad love Lisa bro. I think sheâs really falling for me. She gave me a BJ in my old bedroom. Sadly, your old bedroom is now a workout room with no trace of you at all. I showed Lisa my swimming and track trophies, tried on my old letterman jacket and gave her the whole Will Witt history. Can you believe mom and dad are celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary? I canât!â I lay it on thick as the caring son that Will is.Â
âFuck off.â The mumbles.
âOh Willy, donât make me hurt you more.â I warn him. I can see the drugs have kicked in, and start untying him. Just as I loosen the last night, Willy tries a fast one on me, trying to tackle me to the floor. Iâve wrestled him too many times and know his âplaysâ and another gut punch and Iâm dragging him into the bathroom. A quick shower, shit and breakfast bar and heâs good for another 12 hours.
Once heâs secured, I jump in shower and prep for another day in the office. Fridays are so routine with a team strategy meeting for upcoming projects/videos/content. This is followed by lunch and office time till happy hour at Furleyâs. After happy hour, I meet Lisa and a bunch of her friends out for more drinks and dancing, then back to her place.
END OF THE ROAD
Iâm up early and skip out of Lisaâs, telling her I have some chores to do for my parents and Iâll be tied up all weekend. Willy is awake and thrashing about trying to get loose. I enter the bedroom smiling, and clap my hands.
âWilly, good news! Road trip bro! Weâre going to the cabin to take care of some things for Dad. I thought youâd enjoy it.â
He stares at me, blood shot eyes, a week of facial hair, looking like crap. âGood, could I sleep in one of the bunk beds?â
âSure thing bro, then weâll talk about next steps here.â He calms down, feeling better, probably thinking heâs getting his life back. Heâs not.Â
I drug him, give him a shower, get him dressed and fed. The next morning, I get him ready for 4 hour trip to the cabin. The dosage I gave him should keep him out for most of the trip. I pack some clothes and fishing gear in case I get the urge. We leave at 5am to avoid any traffic.Â
He sleeps the entire journey and I donât stop once. Iâm careful to drive the speed limit to not attract any attention from state police. I pull up to the cabin before 9am. Thereâs no one around, no one on the lake even â all peaceful and quiet. With Willy securely tied up in the car, I walk around the cabin inspecting the place, reminiscing about our family outings and fishing trips. In the rear about 500 feet from the house is an old well thatâs been dry for years. Dad has been talking about filling it in for safety for years, but never did. Itâs the perfect place to hide a body.
When I get back to the car, Willy is stirring. I help him out of the car and walk him inside the cabin.Â
âWill, untie me please. My arms and wrists are killing me.â He pleas.
âSure thing.â Knowing heâs drugged still and couldnât run anywhere or harm me.Â
We walk out to the back porch and I hand him a coke and sandwich. He sits on the step eating and enjoying the partial view of the lake. I laced the coke with enough fentanyl to kill him â heâll just pass out and die peacefully.Â
âSo whatâs the plan Will? I guessing this is it for me. Am I right.â As he takes a large chug of the coke.
âYeah thatâs about it Willy. You wonât feel a thing though, youâll just fall asleep. Hope you enjoyed the coke, no after taste?â
âNah, it tasted fine. You know I need a few cokes a day to keep the energy up.â
âYeah, itâs a habit Iâve had to adopt. You know Willy, Iâve always been a better you and this life is perfect for me. Donât worry, I love my new life and have seamlessly integrated into it. Iâll take good care of it.â
Heâs in a daze now, the drug is kicking in. I help him up and over to an Adirondack chair near the fire pit. He puts his head back and starts breathe erratically. Within minutes he stops breathing. I waste no time stripping and dumping him in the well. I grab a shovel and start shoveling dirt into the well until I canât see any evidence. For good measure I add another foot of dirt on top of that.Â
Iâm exhausted after that, take a shower and dress in clean clothes. In town I grab a bite at Palmerâs diner â a dive with good food. As Iâm sitting there finishing up with a piece of Apple pie, Rob Decker, an old friend of me and Will come up to me. Heâs a local who owns a few small businesses, most inherited from his father.Â
âWill! How are you man? Why didnât you let me know you were coming?â He grabs my hand and shakes it hard.Â
âRob, good to see you! Dad asked me to check on the cabin and I needed a break from LA. Iâm heading back to tomorrow.â
âDude, got your gear?â
âOf course, was going to try the old creek before heading home.â
âIâll join you, heck, even Tommy will go. Heâll be thrilled to see you. He was talking about your videos on Facebook.â
âSound great Rob, stop by tomorrow morning whenever.â
Back at the cabin, I start a campfire and relax. Once itâs burning good, I grab Willyâs clothes and toss it all in. I have an overwhelming sense of accomplishment and freedom now. I have a few beers and watch the fire slowly burn out. Sunday morning Rob and Tommy show up at 6am. They donât even mention my brother Willy even though we were all friends growing up. We have a blast and they want to come to the big city and party with me soon.
I fly back late Sunday afternoon and clean up my condo â unmounting the chair, smoothing over the holes in my carpet, cleaning the bathroom and tossing out the rest of Willyâs clothes. I call Lisa and invite her to my place tomorrow night for dinner and love making.
Monday morning Iâm in full Will Witt mode. I wake up and take my run, shower and fuss with my hair for 20 minutes. In keeping with Dennisâ wishes, I up my conservative appearance to match my new haircut. My new bespoke Saville Row suit anchors my identity as the only Will Witt. Itâs teamed with my favorite blue Brooks Brothers shirt with white contrasting cuffs and collars. I pair it with my new shoes and favorite tie Iâve worn a few times. Joel loves my new attitude and appearance. At lunch, I pull a typical Will move â I escape to a nearby restaurant, hang out and work on my schedule as is habit.Â
Life is great now. I have tons of friends and fans. Prager U is very lucrative and Iâm in demand across the US and world for speaking appearances. No one suspects Iâm not Will. I love the notoriety and acceptance. I even love my preppy wardrobe and new style. Itâs grown on me and Iâll maintain it. Â
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ITâS FINALLY HERE!
In an effort to spread some love to the fanfic authors in the Schittâs Creek community, this post is a compiling of some of our favorite fics! Thank you to every single person who decided to participate in this dedication of love! And to the fanfic authors out there - thank you for being so wonderful and sharing your stories with us! Hereâs to many more countless hours of reading - day or night!Â
There are repeats! I understand that may seem a little redundant, but I wanted everyone who participated to share their favorite fics regardless of repetition, author, pairing, AU, size, etcetera.Â
A very special thanks to everyone who participated!Â
@bestwisheswarmestregards // @brighter-than-sunshine // @danieljradcliffe @darnitdraco // @imargaery // @justwaiting23 // @leopxld-fitz // @lickrustdavid // @loveburnsbrighter // @oceanavinfinity @poorguysheadcanonâ // @ratchet // @roguebabyinyourstore @stuck-on-your-heart // @thisbuildinghasfeelingsâ // @vulcantasticâ @wlwbaudelaireâ
Iâm going to go ahead and put everything under the cut, because this should be quite a long post!Â
**If there are authors on tumblr whose handles were not properly added, please send me a message!
@bestwisheswarmestregardsâ
Fic 1:Â Ace Of Hearts by loveisallyouneed21
Why I like it: It is just really sweet and made me really happy. Plus I like seeing Patrick as an asexual being one myself. I donât see a lot of ace characters in the media so seeing someone portray Patrick, a character I love, as one makes me really happy.Â
Fic 2: An Unexpected Arrival by @justwaiting23âÂ
Why I like it: It was one of the first fics I read in this fandom and I fell in love with it. Plus the Brewers are in it and I love anything with the Brewers.Â
Fic 3: Hammock by @maxbegoneâÂ
Why I like it: This fic makes me so fluffy inside. Early morning and snuggles are one of the best combinations.Â
@brighter-than-sunshineâ
Fic 1: Your Wings Prepare To Fly by @icmezzoÂ
Why I like it: Iâm not the biggest fans of AUs/ Fantasy takes on fics, but the characterization of David and Patrick is so good here. Itâs such a beautifully written fic, and I just couldnât get enough of it when I first read it! A definite reread.
Fic 2: Today and All the Days that Follow by @unfolded73â
Why I like it: This one is one of my all-time favorites, because it explores so many of the relationships between all the characters⌠I especially love the bits including Stevie and Alexis.Â
Fic 3:Â Little Reminders of our Love by @justwaiting23â
Why I like it: The whole idea of David and Patrick leaving each other notes was too adorable not to recommend this fic!
@danieljradcliffeâ
Fic 1:Â Watching Through Windows by @helvetica-upstartâ
Why I like it:Â Some fandoms have those fics that just inevitably change the game and define what fanfiction can be and for me, this is that fic for Schitt's Creek. It is a staple that everyone's read and continues to talk about and recommend a year after it was published; I'm sure we will continue to talk about it for years to come and to recommend it as new folks come into the fandom.
Fic 2:Â Until Now Gives Way to Then by swat117Â
Why I like it:Â I just read this one-shot recently thanks to your (feel free to edit this how you need for your post) recommendation of their other fic, 'Exposed Brick.' This is a fic that (for me) completely captures why David and Patrick fit and work so well together and how their pasts have made it possible for them to be who they are as a couple in SC. I haven't read another fic that resonated with my own interpretation and appreciation of their relationship as much as this one. This author truly and completely sees them for all that they are.
Fic 3: Red White and Blue Jays by @grapehyasynthâ Â
Why I like it:Â I saw this fic published earlier this year and wanted to read it so badly but figured I should read the source material (Red, White, & Royal Blue) first so I did and absolutely fell in love with that book (who wouldn't?). I attribute this fic for inspiring me to read Casey McQuiston's book and so when I went to finally read it, I had extremely high expectations and even still, this fic exceeded them. The author does an amazing job of incorporating aspects of the original book (RWRB) while keeping the story true to the characters and relationships we know and love in Schitt's Creek. I read the entire fic in one sitting and then instantly, read it again. It is laugh out loud funny while being romantic as hell and keeps David and Patrick incredibly in-character throughout.
@darnitdracoâ
Fic 1: Red White And Blue Jays by @grapehyasynthâ
Why I like it: this fic is the reason I bought Red White and Royal Blue. Going into the fic, I didnât know what the book was about so it was all new to me but it was great nevertheless. Now that im almost finished with the book, I love this fic even more. I know its an AU but I think the characters are written well and I pretty much love any fic when Rachel isnât made out to be the bad guy. Its 13 chapters and I will 100% be rereading it after I finish the book.Â
Fic 2: Nothing Burns Like The Cold by @wildxwiredâ
Why I like it:Â This is a one shot and definitely Patrick Centric. I thrive on Angst and Hurt/Comfort. I personally feel like it is Patrick coming to terms with a things he didnât have control over and him getting closure on things of the past. I donât want to give away too much of the plot but please read this guys!!Â
Fic 3: sometimes good things fall apart by @blueink3Â
Why I like it: I have reread this multiple times and it gets better each time. Its only 4 chapters but it isnât rushed. As I said above, I THRIVE on angst and hurt/comfort. This has both, AND protective Patrick. It is a spin on what couldâve happened after the barbecue and it has a happy ending so donât worry.
@imargaeryâ
Fic 1: Dodgeball is f*cking stupid by alldaydream
Why I like it: This is a one-chapter piece that comes in just under 6k and yet the author manages to build a super rich AU experience and tell a complete story that is at once heart-wrenching, sweet, sexy, and thematic. If you want angst that doesnât last too long, that leaves you feeling warm and fuzzy, this is the one-shot for you. I go back to it as much as I go back to some of my favorite D&P scenes from the show.
Fic 2: if not for you by goingmywaydoll
Why I like it: When it comes to fanfiction about our boys, thereâs almost nothing I love more than a high school AU. This is that. But itâs also a ROAD TRIP. What better scenario is there for a slow burn, mutual pining, dialogue heavy love story with plenty of bed sharing and nobody bothering them?
Fic 3:Â Beneath the Winter Snow by Distractivate
Why I like it: Can you tell I love a good AU? This oneâs about the Olympics and it imagines a world in which Patrick and David have already fallen in love, had a relationship, and have broken up. This is a story about them finding their way back to each other--which isnât hard because they have to be around each other all the time and work through their issues. Itâs written with grace and thoughtfulness, and walking with Patrick and David as they learn to communicate with one another and work on healing makes the reunion that much more satisfying.
@justwaiting23â
Fic 1:Â hit me with your best shot by @ignisgayentiaâ
Why I like it: This is a bit of a random one but it has stuck with me ever since I read it. Itâs a short little AU about David and Patrick meeting at a baseball game where Patrick is one of the players. Itâs really sweet and does such a great job of keeping the voices in character, especially with the flirty teasing and awkwardness and is one of those fics I go back to over and over again.
Fic 2: Spills & Thrills by storieswelove
Why I like it: This is one in a series of âMeet-Ugliesâ that the author has written which I adore but itâs my favourite one out of them. It has the perfect mix of awkward interactions which make you cringe and also really sweet and fond moments between the two of them.
Fic 3: You Can Plan on Me by odofidi
Why I like it: This is a sweet little piece of marital fluff about the first Christmas after the wedding. It fits exactly with my idea about what married life would be like for them and is really sweet, plus I always love it when the Brewers are able to see Patrick so genuinely in love with someone like that so itâs definitely one of my very favourites.
@leopxld-fitzâ
Fic 1: best wishes, warmest regards (sent with confetti effect) by reymonova (costiellie)
Why I like it: This fic is just pure fun. The character voices are always perfect, and itâs such a nice addition to the series. This story is full of incredible one-liners and I think about âth*nk y*uâ at least once a week. A must-read for anyone who loves a good Stevie-David friendship moment.Â
Fic 2: Going Down by @concannonfodderâ
Why I like it: This is a perfect AU. Rich David? Check. New York? Check. Patrickâs gay awakening? Check, check, check. This fic feels as real and in-character as any canon events of the show, and the author does an incredible job at lining up a love story for the ages all over again under completely different pretenses. Plus, who doesnât love a âstuck in an elevatorâ trope? I would watch 10 movies based off of this.
Fic 3: Iâve Never Liked A Smile As Much As I Like Yours by hagface
Why you like it: I live for college AUâs, and this one doesnât disappoint. I love how the author repositioned characters and events for a new setting, and David as a picky art major is all I ever could have hoped for. Character interactions are pitch perfect and thereâs a true âpaint me like one of your french girlsâ pining moment that was truly glorious. A great read!!
@lickrustdavidâ
Fic 1:Â Tonight Iâll Drift in A Dream With You by torakowalskiÂ
Why I like it:Â Itâs rare to find such a well-written fic with a great family dynamic that makes you feel like youâre almost just reading a script for the actual show instead of an idea. Thereâs something soft and comforting about reading cohabitation with Alexis and David and Patrick doing there own things on separate sides of the motel room.Â
Fic 2: A Week with the Brewers by @justwaiting23âÂ
Why I like it: The dynamic with David and the Brewerâs is genuinely authentic and itâs made me flash back to some of my own experiences with partners parents. The fact that Patrickâs totally willing to have sex while his parents are there while David is mortified at the idea is also great and realistic. I feel like this fic also shows how partners grow and learn to communicate with one another and trust them.Â
Fic 3: Welcome to Cabaret by @vivianblakesunrisebayâ
Why you like it: The concept of David being more included in the whole Cabaret experience was something I definitely appreciated, since during the show I was kind of bummed with the lack of him. Stevie is wonderfully written in my opinion, and I really liked Patrick going on dates with the choreographer and watching David figure out how to cope.Â
@loveburnsbrighterâ
Fic 1: Small Projects by GCLane
Why I like it: My ultimate comfort fic. Soft relationship feels and loving, passionate discussion of fiber arts, plus nuanced discussion of coming out and fitting in and what it means to be queer. Also David trying new things and doing his best, which is also fun (he learns to knit!)
Fic 2: You and Me and This Temptation by @leupagusâ
Why I like it: Another comfort fic! Musician Patrick/manager David. It's funny asf and super sweet at the same time. Plus it does justice by Rachel, and made me totally love her. Also, I was never sold on AUs of any kind and this is the fic that converted me. I re-read it when I need cheering up and it never fails.
Fic 3: The Moment I Touched Down by rockinhamburger
Why you like it: Patrick learning about David's past and being the sweetest most sympathetic bean :(. This one is full of tragic backstory and good emotional hurt/comfort. Super cathartic to read, and it makes me want to wrap David and Patrick both in big hugs and protect them from the world.
@maxbegoneâ
Fic 1: my heart was broke, my head was sore by @blueink3
Why I like it: This was the first fic I read since coming into the fandom. Itâs canon-divergent, which, as it turns out, I kind of love. Itâs so beautifully-written; a story about David meeting the Brewers much sooner than he anticipated, under unforeseen circumstances that take Patrick back to his hometown - and David is right along with him. And just like in every universe, Marcy Brewer is an angel.
Fic 2: Cleanser by @cypress-treeâ
Why I like it:Â Hello and welcome to my comfort fic! This is just the most soothing story. Itâs my wind-down fic, and every single time I read it, it makes me want to do my own in-depth skincare routine (that I already do morning and night). But itâs not just about that - itâs about Patrick taking a look at his identity as well. Itâs all so tender and sweet, and so intimate in its own lovely way. David pampers Patrick a little bit and shows him that âfemininityâ and âmasculinityâ do not have rigid divides. And the first time I read this, I was wearing a mask from LUSH.
Fic 3: keep my spirit strong, you do by fishypots
Why you like it: Content warning; eating disorders, food issues. This hit me square in the chest. It resonated with me in a way I knew it would but struck so much more within me. By the end of it, I was smiling because of how represented I felt. I know this is a difficult topic for some, but I needed to share this fic. As someone with dysmorphia and struggles with disordered eating, it was such a comfort to read about David, who is a character so vulnerable and his partner who doesnât pester him with questions. Instead he listens, he does a little research (itâs Patrick, of course he does), and remains by him. Itâs all written so realistically and tenderly, and without any jabs or awkward nods toward body image. This will forever be at the top of my list.
@oceanavinfinityâ
Fic 1: I Carry These Heart-Shapes Only to You by ladyflowdi, ships_to_sail
Why I like it:Â It is a work-in-progress au set in Paris during WWII. Patrick is a soldier on leave, and David is a gallerist who sailed to France to help Alexis (as usual). The characters are so, so true to canon, and the world building of Paris in that era will whisk you away from your current place. I love it.
@poorguysheadcanonâ
Fic 1: bright lights by falconeggs (series)
Why I like it:Â my favorite schitts creek fic is definitely the series âbright lightsâ on ao3!
@ratchetâ
Fic 1: In the Temple of Artemis by MoreHumanÂ
Why I like it:Â This story has Stevie exploring (with some help) the identifier of Aromantic after navigating what she thought were her romantic feelings for David. Really sensitively written, with a scene that almost perfectly puts into words my feelings about David & Stevieâs soulmate-esque relationship.
Fic 2: David Rose, Your Husband Is At Guest Services by @patricksdavidâÂ
Why I like it: Husbands! At Costco! Giant muffins and comically large bags of doritos! 2071 words of pure domestic fluff! What more could you ask for?!
Fic 3: Fifteen Hundred Miles by MoreHumanÂ
Why I like it: Okay so. This is very new as part of the Reel Fic Fest, but I needed to include it. I love Wild, both the book & movie, and I am very much a âdeal with my problems by hiking/biking in the forestâ so this spoke to me immediately. Patrick and David meet as strangers hiking 1500 miles of the Pacific Crest Trail. Thereâs nature, pining in nature, tent shenanigans, tent emergencies! Stevie being an excellent friend from afar, a cribbage board, journaling, secret trail register entries, David in flannel, and an ever-present toque. Itâs just a really satisfying and calming 30k words with literally 2 characters. I read it twice in 12 hours.
@roguebabyinyourstoreâ
Fic 1: Fifteen Hundred Miles by MoreHumanÂ
Why I like it:â I like a good AU as much as the next person, but this one is just STUNNING. The descriptions of the pain and struggle endured by both men, both physical and emotional, was vibrantly visceral. David and Patrickâs relationship bloomed organically and you are hooked on their journey through the wilderness as they grow closer and eventually fall in love. Plus itâs Patrickâs POV. Whatâs not to love?
Fic 2: Getting Over Getting Older All The Time by Distractivate Â
Why I like it:â Youâve heard of slow burn? Well meet glacial burn. This masterpiece takes us through 10 years of friendship, of missed opportunities, of pining and heartbreak. But most importantly it shows what we all knew - David and Patrick will find their way to each other regardless of time and distance. Also Patrickâs POV, I sort of love Patrick Brewer.
Fic 3:Â You Could Be The One by bigficenergyÂ
Why I like it: âI have a soft spot for early relationship David and Patrick. But almost no fic does it quite like this. This fic highlights points from our boysâ developing relationship scored by the incomparable Carly Rae Jepsen. This fic is so true to the characters, their voices and their story, that itâs all one giant headcanon for me. This fic is part 1 of a larger series and I highly recommend all of them.
@stuck-on-your-heartâ
Fic 1: a kiss from a rose by mihaly ( @davidroseshusbandâ )
Why I like it: This was the first multi-chapter fic I read when I joined the sc fandom, and I hadnât read fic of any kind in over a year. Itâs a brilliant story where Alexis stars in a reality-dating show. All the characters are portrayed so perfectly in this fic, and you can hear their voices in every piece of dialogue. Itâs sweet, itâs hot, itâs everything you could want in an AU. This story helped me fall in love with fic again so it has a very special place in my heart.Â
Fic 2: Roseâs Eleven by leupagus
Why I love it: This story honestly feels like a movie. I know the concept is based on a film franchise, but the writing in this fic is truly exquisite. Itâs so complex and gripping, and thereâs a heist which is always a good time. Despite the very different world these characters are in, they are still true to themselves, so itâs very exciting to see how they interact with one another in this universe. This is such a fun read from start to finish and just thinking about it makes me want to go back and read it again.
Fic 3: Simply the Vest by orphan_account
Why I love it: If you couldnât tell, Iâm obsessed with AUs. This fic is such a satisfying AU because it incorporates several tropes that we all know and love. In this story, Patrick is an FBI agent, and he has to go undercover as Davidâs boyfriend. So right off the bat thereâs fake dating! And then it has pining because our boys are dumb! AND THEN it has a little smut if thatâs your cup of tea. And while all this is happening, Patrick is being capable and looks very dashing in his FBI vest.
@thisbuildinghasfeelingsâ
Fic 1: Happy to help by @vivianblakesunrisebayâ
Why I like it: This was the first Schittâs Creek fic I fell in love with when I started exploring what was out there after bingeing the show for the first time. Itâs basically a deep dive into Patrickâs POV from Motel Review through Grad Night. It really helped me appreciate Patrick as a character when I was fairly new to the show. I think I formed a lot of head canon regarding Patrickâs life and backstory based on the things I enjoyed in this fic. And itâs just incredibly well written.
Fic 2: turn down the lights, turn down the bed by @hudders-and-hiddlesâ ( @wild-aloof-rebelâ )
Why I like it: I love this take on David and Patrick remaining just business partners until Rock On. I can be a bit of a canon purist, so Iâm really picky when it comes to AU fic. However, there are actually quite a few I enjoy in this fandom. My favorite thing about this one is that it has the exact right amount of angst, to the point where itâs almost physically painful, but in the best possible way. Especially because you know how itâs going to end. This is angst with a happy ending executed perfectly. And itâs so good that it holds up to multiple rereads.
Fic 3: my heart was broke, my head was sore by blueink3
Why I like it: Another canon divergent AU that I love. This one diverges from canon after Grad Night, at which point Patrick has to go home for a family emergency and David goes with him. What I really love about it is how it puts Patrick in a position to be truly vulnerable and gives David the opportunity to kind of be the strong one and really take care of Patrick. This is something we donât get to see to this extent in canon until maybe Meet the Parents, so itâs nice seeing it here so early in their relationship. Also, itâs just so beautifully written.
@vulcantasticâ
Fic 1: no other version of me i would rather be tonight by wardo_wedidit
Why I like it: Iâve always enjoyed the concept of love languages, and it was so sweet watching David do so much for Patrick to show he loves him. Of course, it stems from fear and anxiety that David isnât doing enough for Patrick (especially with Alexis egging him on), which reads very realistically to me. I think we as the audience tend to forget that David has never had anything like this before, has never experienced the love of someone like Patrick. Heâs still learning how to accept that love and return it, in his own unique ways. This fic does a great job of examining that.
Fic 2: Exposed Brick by swat117
Why I like it: To me this is the perfect âPatrick and David visit New Yorkâ fic. Patrick is characterized so beautifully here; we not only see how he aims to please throughout his relationship with David but in his interactions with Rachel and his family as well. I imagine there was a lot left unsaid on the show regarding Patrickâs uneasiness about moving to New York and Davidâs ultimate decision to stay with him in Schittâs Creek--this is explored wonderfully here. Plus, as a new New Yorker, it was really nice to read about all the iconic places in and around Manhattan.
Fic 3: weâll take the world together by sonlali
Why I like it:Â IÂ am a sucker for stories that examine David and Alexisâ relationship before the start of the show. This fic in particular is heart-wrenching, touching on the trauma both siblings likely experienced before we as viewers knew them. I love the idea of David as protector of his younger sister, and to see that sentiment returned by Alexis now that they have grown (physically and emotionally) while living in Schittâs Creek is beautiful to read.
@wlwbaudelaireâ
Fic 1: youâre my peace and my quiet by chocobos
Why I like it: This fic is just so soft and sweet and always puts me in a good mood whenever I reread it. Itâs wonderfully written and I can truly see this as an actual scene in the show.Â
Fic 2: Terrified But The Truth is This by ryry_peaches ( @loveburnsbrighterâ )
Why I like it: As someone whoâs had a headcanon that David is autistic since I started watching the show, this was the first fic I saw pertaining to it. I was happy to see how well it was portrayed, especially giving how poorly Iâve seen fics portray autism in other fandoms, and it even made me see the episode âGirls' Nightâ in a completely different light.Â
Fic 3: Putting Down Roots by @this-is-not-nothingâ
Why I like it: Absolute domestic fluff is my jam and this fic delivers it and then some. It gives me everything I could want in a post-canon fic where David and Patrick are happily married and living in their cottage.
Again, thank you to everyone who made this post possible! I am so happy we were able to spread some love and cheer to the fic writers of this community! Sending so much love to each and every one of you, and Iâm hoping this provides some new material for the community to discover as well!Â
#sc community fic rec#sc fic rec#schitt's creek#schitts creek#schitt's creek fic#schitt's creek fic rec#david rose#patrick brewer#david x patrick#stevie budd#alexis rose#my post#bestwisheswarmestregards#brighter-than-sunshine#the-power-of-potter#danieljradcliffe#user: danieljradcliffe#darnitdraco#imargaery#justwaiting23#leopxld-fitz#lickrustdavid#loveburnsbrighter#oceanavinfinity#poorguysheadcanon#ratchet#roguebabyinyourstore#stuck-on-your-heart#user: stuck-on-your-heart#thisbuildinghasfeelings
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dude sheepy do u know abt corpse party? if theres rumors abt the delinquent school being haunted, imagine smth kind of like that in that school, but like with less gore. maybe even a ghost love interest. maybe!!! the reader is one of jacks goons and!! love triangle?? i gotta go
Let me throw in not only one, but two new characters in the mix because I'm a masochist.
Jack my boy, I'm sorry, but you have some competition. Also no, Bucky isn't one of the "official characters" (as in, there won't be any requests available for him).
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Hidden, forgotten, and starving [Yandere!Delinquent x Goon!Reader x Yandere!Ghost boy x (Fuck, another possible Yandere!oc??)]:
(Non-binary reader btw)
You know, when your leader said something along the lines of "Meet me up in 9 p.m", you thought it was going to be something fun. Maybe you and the gang would be able to hangout without having to be on school grounds, or on a dark nasty alley.
But, nah, that was only wishful thinking.
Jack's type of fun is a little different from the normal person's type of fun. Is surprisingly really violent for someone who's is kinda small, and has such a pretty face.
Not, that you have noticed or anything.
Hell, one of these days he said he would burn a whole corporation and drag some rich family's name into the mud for, pissing him off? You guess?? He was ranting, so none of you actually payed attention.
Again, he may be a little short, but that anger in his soul is something no human can comprehend. Where were you? Oh yeah, he didn't call the gang to play some games and have fun, he had called y'all to beat the shit out of some other gangâŚ.
On school groundsâŚ..
At night.
"- âŚ. You know this isn't a good idea, right?"
You asked him if he was sure, but he didn't say anything. He was focused on only one goal.
Entering inside the school isn't really hard. If anything, is pretty easy, jump the horribly placed iron fence. Ya done. Welcome to Saint Bernard's School for Little Prodigies! Where everything sucks, and everyone is insane!
"- It isn't so bad! There are a lot of cool things hidden in this place⌠There are so many legends that graduated from this school!" Your fellow gang member and also local himbo sweetheart, Bucky, (is actually Benedict, but he doesn't really like that name), said it.
"- I don't think soâŚ" You said honestly. You don't really think you, Bucky, Jack and the others are going to find anything special except dust and old shit. The only thing that will spice this night is this gang meet up or whatever.
"- Come on, it will be fun! We can search the school and find all type of old stuff!" You look at how excited he is, and although you love him dearly, you can't help but still have difficulty to enjoy this whole situation.
"- BuckyâŚ.. it's old stuff."
"- I know right! Can you go with me [Y/N]-"
"- Oh my God- Shut up!" Jack yelled. He was getting impatient with your whole conversation. He had only came here to show some girl gang that this school doesn't have any space for them. Not to seeâŚ. You and that imbecile talking about stupid shit.
When he yelled he did seem to mention it more towards Bucky than you. It's not that he doesn't like him, it's just that he-
"- [Y/N], come here!" Jack yelled again, calling you to get closer.
You go towards him, as he asks you to look around and see if you can see anyone. But no one seems to be near the school grounds, and you can't see any motorcycle girl's gang anywhere.
"- Why exactly are we going to fight them again?" You ask, tired more than usual of Jack's odd behavior. Or well, usual behavior.
"- âŚ." Silence. He doesn't answer you, but his expressions changes a little. Fuck, why can't you just follow his lead without questioning everything.
âŚ
No, he shouldn't have thought that, ever. Y'all are your own people, you don't need to hear him, he prefers when you guys decide for yourselves. Well mostly the other ones, when it comes to you, he has a hard time acknowledging how he doesn't like how you head in into danger without hearing him.
He never stops to actually think about this stuff, maybe today he justâŚ.. feel a little more on edge than usual.
After seeing that neither you or the rest will just drop the question, he answered.
"- âŚ. Sigh. The leader of the other gang wants to be the new Little Miss Red." He said unbothered, while everyone had an extreme reaction, you were left wondering who the fuck was Little Miss Red.
Sounds like a anime villain, or something like that.
"- [Y/N]!! Y-you don't w-who Little, L-little-"
Bucky was trying to ask you so hard, but he couldn't stop stuttering with excitement and fear. Jack is having none of his dumb attitude today.
"- Speak up. Little Miss Red." He said, harshly. What is wrong with him today?
"- S-sorry Jack. Little Miss Red was the first student to form a gang and dominate the entire school!" He is excited to tell you everything he knows. He may be a little troublemaker, but is mostly because he really admires Lil Red and her story (even if most was left far away from public sight).
"- Oh, really?" You're not gonna lie, you wished you were sleeping at home. You wished you heard about this chick on another day. You can't be bothered right now. So what? Some girl wants to be the new Red? What do you have to do with it?
"- She wants to dominate the school, dumbass." Another one of your group said. Fuck that guy, you can't even remember his name, you're really tired.
"- If not the whole entire neighborhood around the school." Said Jack.
"- Well, I'm pretty sure they aren't coming, how about we just go home then-"
A loud noise came from inside the school. You guys could see a little bit of light coming from outside the windows.
"- Are they inside?" You ask.
"- We were supposed to meet outside." Jack responded.
âŚ.
Silence.
And then, of course, since you guys really needed an encouragement to get inside that hell place, all of you heard a disturbing, inhuman scream. And after that, a female voice calling for help.
"- âŚ. We, are going in, orâŚ?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like, this is a really, really dumb idea. Normally when someone hears a terrible noise and then a call for help, it only ends up being a terrible sign.
"- Going towards the monster, nice plan." You said sarcastically. It's not that you're afraid of monstersâŚ.. You just don't want to meet one, in person.
"- Monsters aren't real." Jack said.
"- ⌠But if you really are scared, then come here."
"- Sure."
You walked closer to Jack, that was leading the way towards the corridors. His phone's flashlight being extremely useful.
Something is bugging his mind ever since you all entered school grounds. He feels like Bucky is getting a little too friendly with you, and although he shouldn't be mad about something so stupid, he can't stop thinking about this.
He needs to concentrate, but he can't stop worrying about Bucky losing his guard and you-
"- Hey, I think we should separate."
...
"- ⌠What?"
He is being a dumbass.
"- Why though? What if we can't find each other?"
He only wants to ask you a simple question, but is such a stupid question. He needs everyone to go away so you two can talk.
"- Let's divide into two groups, I'll go with [Y/N], y'all can go upstairs and check it out."
"- But that's not even equally divided-"
"- I said, go upstairs-"
âŚ
Again.
Another scream. That same female voice, it sounds so close, coming from the other hall.
But then another one, a male voice coming fromâŚ. Everywhere.
He sounds desperate, he says that someone should get him out.
"- Hello? Who's there?" Bucky asked.
"- You know, you shouldn't ask ghosts questions, they can start fucking stuff up man." One of the other members said.
"- Oh, but they sound in pain, shouldn't we help-"
"- Please⌠I don't want to stay hereâŚ" The male voice said. His voice is starting to crack, he is crying.
His voice is coming from somewhere really close.
"- Argh!" You all turned your backs to see a girl in leather jacket trying to crawl. She finally notice that she wasn't alone.
"- Help!-" Hands covered her mouth, her face, her arms, it started dragging her backwards.
You guys were going to follow her, when again.
"- Please, open this doorâŚ." You heard him, he was in agony. You couldn't leave him alone.
Jack and the others were following the girl, while you kept walking down the hallway. Following the voice.
You felt like you needed to help him. Desperately. He was going to die if you didn't. To you it felt like ages as you walked slowly to the janitor's closet.
Walking silently, trying to hear his pleads. He got louder and louder the more you came closer to his prison.
You found the janitor's closet. The door was shaking with the pounds of the boy.
"- GET ME OUT GET ME OUT GET ME OUT GET ME OUT GET ME OUT-"
You opened the door. It wasn't locked. It hadn't been locked since a long time.
You finally woke up from, whatever the hell happened to you just now. But you don't think you're a 100% fine, tho.
You can only hear a deafening silence. There is no one here. There is nothing here except for old paper on the ground.
You walked in, slowly, afraid that if you took a bad step you would suddenly fuck something up.
You kneeled down, looking at the documents in the ground. You, suddenly feel a little too eager to read them.
Maybe you're just feeling really curious.
There are old newspapers, all saying something about Saint Bernard's School for Little Prodigies. Some saying something about Little Miss Red, others about the school bad conditions and somehow involvement into the Amaryllis Academy's school foundation.
You found a couple of notes cut into pieces, some are not easy to read. Others are really simple and, although you would normally find really boring to read this kind of stuff, you have a odd feeling reading them.
It's two friends talking over paper messages. They seem to be in class and can't let the teacher know they're not paying attention. They talk about meeting after school, and having plans on a Saturday. It doesn't have a exact date on the paper, but you can see the paper is pretty old and dirty.
It sounds like a normal friendship. One of them even said:" I have something really important to tell you, but I can't really tell you in person since I'm really shy about this stuff. I'll tell you this Saturday, I promise."
You found old photos of students on the ground. Most are market with a red marker. Crosses all over their faces. But the are only two that you can see the face of.
A chubby black girl, big curly hair, wearing glasses. She is looking really awkward in this picture, as if she didn't want to take it. She is wearing the same blue jacket you're using right now.
The other one, however.
Is the same chubby black girl. Her hair has red streaks on it, and she isn't wearing the blue jacket, but rather a red vest, with fishnets under going from her shoulder, to her hands. You almost thought they weren't the same person, one looks shy and awkward, but somehow really sweet, the other one is straight up giving whoever was the cameraman the middle finger. Her faces says how done she is with everyone's bullshit.
You like this girl. You guess this is the girl you heard about.
And the last thing you found. Was a cut article about, some student that was found dead out of nowhere on this school.
His body was inside this closet.
You didn't notice, but time suddenly stopped when you enter in the janitor's closet. It didn't stop literally, but you didn't felt like it was running normally.
On a moment you were seeing a girl being dragged by some hands, and now your reading some old creepy stuff.
Which reminded you-
"- [Y/N]! Where are you?" Jack asked, his voice was somewhere distant.
"- Wait, guys I'm here!"
You get up as fast as you can, but it didn't matter.
As soon as you return to reality after reading about your cursed school, you felt the sudden realization that they didn't see you going the other way. Hell, you didn't even help that girl that was being fucking dragged!
Before you can escape this terrible place, the door closes.
And it locks itself.
"- No, no, no, no, no, guys! Come on, I'm here, you idiots!"
You bang the door and scream as loud as you can. No one can hear you.
"- Goddammit."
You start packing, thinking they might leave you here if you don't do something. But before you can think of a way out, the realization of you not being the only one inside there, hits you really hard.
"- âŚ. He-help!" You heard it. That same male voice from before. Closer than ever. He sounds like he is right behind you.
Yet his voice sounds hoarse. Timid, yet cold.
You turn around to look at your company, you see a student, just like you, curled up into a ball, holding his stomach. He is murmuring nonsenseâŚ.
You try to get closer.
Hey, maybe he is lost�
You can see he is a latino boy with long hair, tied as a low ponytail. He is shaking uncontrollably.
"- I'm- I'm so hungry. Please, let me go."
He managed to say out loud.
"- Hey, are you alright? I can help you, we just need to get out of this closet, I can buy you something, okay?"
What happened to this poor guy? He seems traumatized.
"- Pl-please!"
He stutters again. You came closer, putting your hand on his shoulder.
"- I'm going to help you, okay?"
You say.
He stopped shaking. He stopped talking. He stopped hyperventilating. He stopped breathing.
He is extremely cold.
Before you can react, you're pinned to the ground. The ghost boy on top of you, salivating like a mad man.
"- Hey! Get off!" You don't want to believe this guy is dead. Ghosts aren't real. Monsters aren't real, right??
He is breathing even faster than before. Like there isn't enough air on his lungs.
Believe it or not, he truly doesn't want to do this.
"- âŚ.. I'm sorry." He apologized before biting your neck.
"- What?-Aaaaargh!-"
For a ghost guy, he does feel really real! It hurts a lot!! What is he a vampire or a ghost?
You're bleeding. He isn't trying to suck your blood, he is trying to tear your skin.
You can hear his stomach growling.
And you can also hear Jack searching for you. You manage to free yourself from the ghosts grip and move yourself away for a bit.
"- Jack? JACK! Help!- Argh, fuck! Get off!"
Only to have him try to tear your arm away. He isn't doing a good job at this though.
"- I'm sorry. I-I'm really sorry!" You look and see him crying.
"- Well, then let me-"
A unholy screech comes from you. He broke your arm, at first he didn't seem so strong, but after feeling him digging his fingers into your arm and rotating it, you can tell he really is trying to tear your arm away.
He could have done this quicker. But he didn't want to do this to begin with! He swears, he doesn't like doing thisâŚ
For your luck, your scream is heard. You can see the door shaking and hear Jack screaming for you on the other side.
Ghost boy got distracted by it. Usually, there isn't anyone at night. Actually, he is the whole reason there isn't any night classes.
Too many students and staff members suddenly going missing at night time.
It's good to meet new people. He used to think so. He misses having company.
He misses not endlessly consuming people to satisfy an endless hunger.
"- Jack!" You took advantage of the boy's distraction, and decided to get away from him. You kicked him, but your foot passed right through him.
You still managed to get away and reach the door. You looked back, thinking he was chasing you.
He wasn't. He didn't want to. He could, but he really didn't want to.
He only said his goodbye towards you, still apologizing for what happened.
You were too surprised by the boy's action, that you collided with Jack when he opened the door.
"- Ouch- Really? You missed me this much [Y/N]?"
You can't respond. You're hyperventilating like you just runned a marathon.
"- Hey, are you alright? I heard you screaming, are you hurt?"
You remember your arm was broken, and that's when you realize, it's really painful. Yet you can't really find the right words right now.
"- [Y/N]?!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jack brought you home after the whole incident happened. Turns out the girl that was getting dragged was actually the leader of the gang you were supposed to fight off.
Janette, the girl's name, was "playing a little prank on everyone", cause you know, that's really funny when everyone is scared as hell.
The fight was still going to happen, but Jack couldn't care less about that or her, he only wanted take care of your broken arm. Janette didn't really complain, she didn't understand how the hell you managed to get your arm broken, but she didn't want to fight anyone that was already in disadvantage.
Although being someone that wanted to pick a fight with all of you, Janette helped you out with your broken arm and bleeding caused by the ghost boy.
She is apparently really talented when it comes to dealing with this stuff, you can tell she has been through a lot, looking at her scarred face.
She is really pretty for someone so build. Damn, that actually makes her more pretty though.
Oh, and about the ghost. No one fucking believes you. They all think you either were hallucinating or just "saw things because you were scared".
You tried to explain how you got hurt, but when you mentioned a ghost, absolutely no one understood what you were talking about.
Anyway, you had a long night. You need some rest. In the morning you'll explain what happened to everyone.
Even if you yourself can't tell what really went down while you were at school.
Your mind keeps re-telling you what the ghost had told you before you left.
"- I'm sorry. I was really hungry."
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#yandere#sheep stuff#yandere x reader#yandere oc#special delivery headcanons#yandere delinquent#yandere delinquent x reader#yandere ghost#speciak delivery fanfiction#yandere oc x reader#yandere oc fanfiction#yandere ghost x reader
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Submitted to r/nosleep by u/NemesisLuce
Please support the original author.
Donât get me wrong, I love my job. Cute little bookstore in a quaint little town. I love helping customers find the right book for their mood. I love showing cute childrenâs books to curious kids. I love talking with sales reps and figuring out exactly which new releases to order from them.
I also fucking hate my job.
It was ten minutes past closing time, and I had my brightest, fakest smile on while trying to get the last customer out of my store. No sir, I cannot look up a book on the computer if all you know is the cover was red when you saw a poster for it 5 years ago. No sir, âI think it was about the cold war and a detective who drank too much but maybe it was something elseâ does not help me at all. Look sir, all my historical thrillers are on this shelf. Does anything ring a bell? No? Was it made into a movie? You donât know? Oooookaaaay then, Iâm sorry to inform you that we are already past closing time, hereâs the store number, if you remember the title give us a call and weâll order it for you if itâs still available. Thank you, good evening to you too sir, goodbye. Yes you have your umbrella, itâs right here in your hand sir. Okay bye bye.
I sighed and gave my cashier the biggest eyeroll I could manage before locking the door and turning over the sign that previously said âcome in, weâre open!â. I heard the coins clanking in the coin counting machine (do these have a name? I donât know. Coin counting machine is pretty self-explanatory and Iâve never bothered to check if they were actually called that), signifying that Alice had started to sort her cash drawer. I would only need to take out the profits of the day, make sure she had enough cash for tomorrow, and send her home. I went through the motions mechanically, only thinking about the nap I was about to have in the breakroom. It was going to be glorious. I really needed it if I wanted to be alert for the night shift.
Oh, yeah. Weâve got a night shift here. Itâs my store���s most⌠peculiar aspect. We close at 6pm, but we open again at 11, up until 5am. Then we open again at 10am. So when I said ânapâ earlier, I actually meant the first half of my night, since I am working both shifts. Yes, I live in my store. Please buy books instead of reading stuff on the Internet, I would really love to be able to afford another employee.
So there I was, counting money fully on autopilot, daydreaming about drinking a nice cup of herbal tea and hugging my pillow, when Alice said something that ruined my plans.
âI forgot to tell you, something weird happened when you were on break.â
I snapped out of my daydream instantly and shot her a questioning glare.
âYeah, this old lady came in, looking for something about fairy tales. I showed her the section but she didnât want to have a look there apparently, and she asked me about something from the back. And I was like âdo you think weâre hiding books from our customers or somethingâ so I just told her everything we had was on display in the store but we could order any book we didnât have if she wanted. And she just shook her head and mumbled something and then she handed me this pamphlet and I was like âokay feel free to look aroundâ and didnât even look at the pamphlet before shoving it in my pocket because a kid entered the store holding an open juice box and that was a disaster waiting to happen so yeah but that was weird right?â
She had actually run out of breath by the end of her sentence, and I wasnât surprised. I was pissed though.
âAlice for FUCKS sake. Give me the pamphlet, donât look at it. Iâll write that you were fired because of the storeâs financial situation and give you a glowing recommendation.â
All color drained from the young girlâs face. I wasnât mad at her, but I was still mad. She was supposed to know the rules. Hell, I even had her train the temps we hired to help around Christmas time. In retrospect, it was a miracle nothing bad had happened.
Okay, I was slightly mad at her. But I really didnât want to be.
I saw in her eyes that it had finally clicked. She understood the gravity of what she had done, and handed me a crumpled pamphlet from her pocket, making sure to avert her gaze. God damn it. She had one momentary lapse, and it cost me a good cashier. Fucking hell.
âIâm sorryâŚâ she started.
âItâs okay Alice, you didnât mean to. You were alone on the floor, she was an old bat, it couldâve happened to anyone. Youâll be missed around here, but please donât visit.â
She nodded. She finally remembered the rules, and she understood that there was no other way.
I put the cash drawer in the safe while she gathered the stuff she had left in the break room. I opened the back door to light a cigarette. She had tears in her eyes as she exited the store. I gave her a smile and clasped her hands in mine.
âYou were a good employee, Alice. Youâll do great in a regular bookstore. Donât doubt yourself and avoid this street for a few weeks. Call me if you run into any trouble, okay?â
âThank you for the opportunity, boss. I really loved working here.â
âI know you did. Now hurry home. Donât answer to anyone knocking on your door. Be safe.â
She nodded and scurried away, her backpack bouncing with her steps. I crammed my half-finished cigarette into the already-full-but-I-keep-forgetting-to-empty-it ashtray and went back inside.
The pamphlet was sitting on top of the safe, and as I grabbed it I felt the urge to read it. Nope. In the bin you go. I was accustomed to those old tricks. First rule of working with my clientele is to know when you canât trust your instincts because somethingâs fucking with them. Second rule is to trust your instincts. Confusing? Welcome to my life.
So I ended up sitting at my desk typing furiously on my computer instead of napping. I still had a few hours until night shift, but I absolutely had to start interviewing prospective employees in the next couple days â in the meantime I just had to hope one of my part-time employees would like to work a few extra hours. I just have too much work to spend all my time manning the register and keeping the tables neat. While the store isnât that big, it still is a lot for one person.
I obviously had to update the employee rulebook as well. Just emphasize that you canât take chances with crazy old people. You never know if theyâre truly crazy or something else.
âNever accept anything a customer hands you directly if itâs not (real) money. If theyâre promoting something, make them leave any cards, pamphlets, posters at the register. If you end up accepting whatever they gave you, donât look at it, and come to me immediately.â
Yes, itâs weird. I know itâs weird. Look, I pay my employees a fair enough wage that they make sure to follow the rules. I donât care if they think Iâm crazy. I probably am. It doesnât matter.
I pressed enter and added:
âIf a customer asks if they can see what we have in the back, politely decline and offer them to order whatever book they need. If they persist, come get me.â
God damn it, Alice actually handled this part well. But she grabbed the pamphlet, and I had to protect her.
I donât write the rules to make my employees better workers. I write them to make sure they survive. The main reason any infraction is cause for termination is that, well, it could be the cause for the actual termination of their existence on Earth. Getting fired from a job is a way better alternative.
Alice accepted the old ladyâs pamphlet. It couldâve been anything else. A tissue, a cigarette, a glass of water. She unknowingly made a bargain with whatever the woman was. âI gave you something, now Iâm free to take somethingâ. Entities like the old lady abide by archaic rules. In a store, this is what applies. I lost a regular day customer that way. The poor lady was watching over her kid, who was merrily making a mess looking through the 3-5 years old section, when a young girl came up to her. âLook miss, look I made a drawingâ, she said. My customer grabbed the piece of paper and the girl ran off. A couple days later, posters popped up everywhere in town for a missing toddler.
I was obviously pissed. Iâd been waiting to see that little girl again and tell her that business rules applied only between merchant and customers and she had no right to force an innocent, unaware person into a contract. My night clientele is well aware of that, and treasure having a place to find literature enough to not risk jeopardizing the fragile balance between both worlds. Nonhumans can be facetious little shits though, and Iâve never seen that girl again. Some entities enjoy chaos just for the sake of it. This one just danced around the rules, grabbed what she wanted, and ruined two lives. My customer sank into a deep depression and ended up gouging her eyes out during a manic episode. Her toddler was never found, but I donât think he will grow up to be a respectable, human adult.
I checked the time and decided I could get 2 hours of sleep before having to get the store ready for night shift. So obviously I went to check out who â or what â was knocking on the glass window near the entrance because who needs sleep anyway.
It was an old lady, her wrinkled bloated nose pressed against the glass, her skeletal fingers tapping against it in a rhythmical fashion that was getting on my nerves. She had piercing, blood-injected eyes that were fixed on me and a grin so large it couldnât possibly be natural.
I didnât have time to be scared, but I still felt the fear creeping up on my stomach, slowly making its way through my body. No matter how hard I tried to reject it, I couldnât. Stupid human nature. I adorned my best customer service smile and walked up to the old lady.
âMy apologies, you seem to be a bit early. We will be open for business at eleven.â
I didnât need to yell. I knew she could hear me clearly in spite of the glass separating us.
One⌠two⌠three taps on the window. Her already impossibly wide grin grew even wider, revealing rotten teeth sticking out of black, putrid gums. Thick, yellowish saliva was dripping down in strands from her non-existent lips. By the time the corners of her mouth reached her temples, I was sure I would lose my fake confidence and run in the opposite direction. No matter how many times you deal with unnatural entities, being mere centimeters away from a nightmarish mouth full of rot and decay will shake you to your core. I tried to breathe calmly, being secretly thankful for the glass that separated me from what was probably the foulest smell Iâd ever submitted my nose to, hoping the old lady would see me standing my ground and respect the rules of business. I could deal with her inside my bookstore, where she would be a customer. I just needed to stay brave and meet her transfixed, unwavering gaze. Her eyes were more blood vessels than pupils, and I found myself focusing on those instead of whatever was moving in her mouth. I did not want to see her tongue, not after seeing the state of her teeth. And I sure as hell did not want to see whatever I clearly caught moving around her mouth if it wasnât her tongue. No, her eyes were scary but I could deal with them, no matter how unsettling it was to see them bulge in and out of her head in a slow motion, almost as if they were breathing. The glass became foggier and foggier on her side due to her heavy, animalistic panting, but I kept my gaze straight, only catching glimpses of fog and movement in my peripheral visions. If I were to treat her like an animal, I needed to assert myself as the alpha. I donât yield to rude, entitled customers, and I wouldnât yield to rude, entitled nonhumans breaching the unspoken contract that allowed them to enjoy my store.
After what felt like forever, she stopped tapping on the window. Her grin reverted back to a normal, almost friendly smile. She blinked, soggy wrinkled eyelids covering those eyes I had stared at for far too long.
âI guess Iâll see you when youâre open, thenâ. In spite of the glass panel separating us, I felt her putrid breath against my ear as she whispered her parting words.
Just like that, she turned and left.
Understandably, I was not looking forward to seeing her during the night shift. My regular customers were unsettling enough, I did not want to add the batshit-insane-nightmarish-grandma to the list.
Iâm a business owner. The customer may not be always right, but they are always my priority. I will have to open tonight, because while some may not consider books to be a necessity, I guarantee you that it is vital not only for my business, but for some of my night customers that I open every night. I complain about my life a lot, but some of them face issues they canât simply look up on the internet nor ask a friend or even a therapist. They may urgently need something from the night inventory, and I will do my best to provide it for them. Iâve always loved being a bookseller, but helping nonhumans find whatever fits their very specific needs has given me a sense of purpose Iâm not ready to give up just yet.
I will open tonight. And I will protect my business and its rules, to ensure that I can open tomorrow night.
(Note: edited some words to fit in with the location LOL)
#r/nosleep#ghoststories#storytelling#bookstore#book store owner#ghosts#creepy#bedtime stories#SoundCloud
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Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Chapter 17
Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC
Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.
Word Count: 12,131
FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER
Credit for super frigginâ cute and super frigginâ amazing cover art goes to the super frigginâ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

Day three of Operation Boyfriend But Shh Not Really and so far, so good.
Though the thought of this triple date had my inner recluse curling up into the fetal position, I'd manage to convince myself it actually was a good thing when you really thought about it. One, it gave me more practice for trying to do this whole couplyâŚÂ thing I was trying to do. More practice meant I'd eventually, hopefully be more comfortable with it all, as well as less chance for screw-ups in front of my parents when the dreaded but inevitable weekend with them at last came. Two, we were trying to maintain this image of being boyfriend and girlfriend in front of everyone else at the mall. And boyfriends and girlfriends went on dates. What better way to be seen going on said dates than by going out with other actual couples? And three, we couldn't forget about the person the Duke had hired to tail Anna originally and could quite possibly still be keeping tabs on me now. If they were still out there lurking, it was important that they, even more so than anyone else,see me dating.
It was still kind of weird to think about - that an actual, real life PI or whatever had been surveilling me constantly for who knows how long and I'd had no idea. It felt so surreal. Unreal even. But the Duke was absolutely that crazy and I wouldn't put it past him to still have someone keeping an eye on me, looking for any cracks in the story, any slip-ups or mistakes. I'd have to start paying attention more when I was out and about, see if I could figure out who it was, spot any faces that seemed to always show up everywhere I went.
But then, even if I did identify a likely culprit, I would have absolutely no idea what to do with that information once I had it. Even if I marched right up to them and told them their cover had been blown so they may as well scram, the Duke was just insane enough and rich enough to keep hiring new people to do the job instead.
...jeez, I was really starting to sound paranoid now, wasn't I?
With my luck, it'd turn out the Duke no longer had anyone following me after he'd confronted me in the food court.
Best not to think about it too much, because honestly? It'd get me nowhere.
Sighing, I banished the thoughts from my head as I watched the buildings blur past my window from the backseat of Riku's silver Ford Focus. The three of us were on our way to the restaurant now and Lea, Kairi and Sora were going to meet us there. My hand anxiously smoothed out the creases of my outfit - a dark magenta sheath dress with long sleeves and a hemline at the knees. It had a tastefully low v-neckline and a double layered skirt, the top layer made of a shimmering gossamer material. Nice, but nothing too fancy for our "nothing too fancy" date, to use Kairi's words.
Per Lea's request, I'd also worn his leather jacket. It made sense, after all. Nothing screamed "dating" more than one half of a couple wearing their other half's clothes, so it certainly helped maintain the facade. His boy scent still lingered on it, even though he hadn't worn it in a couple of days now, given it had been in my possession. The smell was somehow both soothing and butterflies-in-the-stomach inducing at the same time. It was an odd mix of emotions, to say the least.
I felt a buzz in the jacket's pocket. Pulling out my phone (gosh, it was so weird having one again after going so many weeks without) I checked my notifications to discover I'd received a text.
Well, speak of the devil.
Still cant believe u didnt lemme come pick u up
Shaking my head with a small snort, I tapped out a reply to Lea.
It just made the most logical sense for me to ride with Riku and Rayne since we were all coming from the same place.
Rayne suddenly cried out happily, drawing my attention to her as she clapped and bounced in the front passenger seat. "Ahh, I'm still just so excited for date night! Good food, great company, hot hubby," she slyly pinched Riku's cheek, which he endured with dignity as he drove. "What more could a girl ask for?"
He chuckled as he shifted the car over into the turn lane. "You make it sound like I never take you out."
"You know that's not what I mean!" she playfully smacked his shoulder. "But with the baby on the way, I don't know how many more of these I'll have! This is one of my last chances to enjoy freedom! Jesus take the fucking wheel, hallelujah!"
I felt my phone vibrate in my hand again and I looked down at it.
I know not this logic u spk of
I felt a tiny smile pulling at my mouth as my thumbs typed.
Don't worry about it. Tis beyond your mortal ken.
"I just hope no one's drinking tonight," Riku snerked as I watched those three dots bounce at the bottom of my screen. "Don't need you dancing on any more tables, thank you very much."
"Your face dances on tables!" Rayne shot back, sticking her tongue out at him.
"That doesn't even make any sense."
"You don't even make any sense!"
Rude. Ill have u know I had half a mind 2 drive ovr n get u NEway, logic b damned
My smile turned a touch wicked.
I'm impressed. That's half a mind more than you usually have.
"Here we are!"
My head shot up as I heard the engine shut down. I hadn't even realized we were in a parking lot. I hadn't even realized the vehicle had stopped moving.
As I looked out my window again, I heard Rayne saying, "Have I mentioned how happy I am we're doing this?"
"You may have said something about that once or twice." I could hear the smile in Riku's low voice.
Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her leaning over towards him, her hand coming up to run slender fingers through his long, ashen strands. "Yeah, but maybe I should show you."
"Maybe you shouldâŚ"
And that's when I, being the absolute clueless, blissfully naive little fool that I was, chose to turn and fully look at them, just in time to get a front row seat to their little game of tonsil hockey. I blushed, threw up a hand to block my line of sight and made a tiny noise of disgust in my throat. "Ugh! You know you're not the only people in the car, right?"
Rayne pulled away to smirk back at me. "Well, other people can shoo," she flicked a dismissive hand in my direction before grabbing Riku by his collar and yanking him over for a deeper, more passionate kiss. Ding, ding, round two!
Squeaking, I fumbled with my seatbelt until I heard the click release, threw my car door open, stumbled out and slammed it shut behind me with a huff.
Oi, that was the main drawback to this group date plan. We were going to be around actual couples, and actual couples actually, ahemâŚÂ snogged. Rayne and Riku were going to be bad enough, but let's not forget Sora and Kairi were along for the ride too and I'd seen firsthand how gross those two could be as well. Mark my word, this night was going to have more than its fair share of uncomfortable moments with those four around, being all besotted and smitten and other such rot. But I would survive this and make it through to the other side. Somehow.
Sweeping my braid forward over one shoulder, I glanced up at the building before me now. It bore a colorful banner over its entrance that read Fuente Del Oro. A local, family-owned Mexican restaurant, or so Rayne had told me. I could already tell this was going to be a very different experience from the types of restaurants my ex used to take me to for our dates. Those restaurants had all been about the look, the prestige⌠you didn't go to any of those places for the food, you went there to be seen, to give off an air of importance. Those places were⌠dull. Lifeless. This place before me now, on the other hand, was⌠nice. Colorful. Vibrant and full of character. Not elegant or frilly, but warm and inviting. And the aromas that I could smell coming from it, even all the way out here? Delicious.
I was actually kind of looking forward to this.
Phone still in my grasp, I looked back down at it and frowned.
No message back from Lea yet.
A giggle suddenly echoed out across the parking lot and my eyes snapped towards the source. It didn't take long to spot Kairi a few vehicles over, squirming and laughing in Sora's arms as he hugged her from behind, blowing raspberries against her neck. They were standing with a very familiar redhead who was leaning against a very familiar black muscle car. Said redhead had pulled his hair back into a ponytail again and was dressed in a snug, black tee with a second shirt on underneath, red and black horizontal stripes running down its full-length sleeves. His slim, dark jeans made his already long legs seem even longer and he was sporting his bright red Converse. He had his phone in hand in front of him, but it wasn't the phone he was looking at. Our eyes met and a grin tugged at one corner of his lips.
Suddenly, whatever boldness that I had felt behind the safety of text on the tiny, glowing screen in the palm of my hand had abandoned me and I felt a small pang of anxiety pierce my chest.
But I rallied.
Alright, Elsa, pep talk time. You can do this. You've been mentally and emotionally preparing for this since yesterday. Let him throw at you whatever fluffy, sappy moves he decides to today, all in the name of pretending to be your boyfriend. You can take it.
Shields raised and at full power, captain!
Inhaling and exhaling slowly, I pocketed my mobile and started making my way over to those three. Probably hearing my footsteps against the asphalt, Kairi and Sora looked over at me as I approached and greeted me with waves. I gave them a shy smile and returned the wave as Lea held his phone up, turning the screen towards me and showing the last message I'd sent him as he tsked, "Brutal. You wound me, madame."
I stopped a few feet away from him, my smile twitching wider. "You like it."
"True. What can I say, I've always been a bit of a masochist," he hummed a low chuckle, slipping his phone into the back pocket of his pants. His head tipped to one side and he stared at me for another second, then his eyes crinkled as he stretched a hand out towards me with a soft, "C'mere."
I bit my bottom lip, hesitating for a heartbeat before moving another step forward to take his offered hand.
"Lookit you," he whistled, closing his fingers around mine and leading me into a little twirl. "Digging the look." He then gently pulled me against him, drawing my arms up to hug his neck before slipping his hands beneath the jacket to wrap around my waist, enveloping me in his cinnamon scent. "Didn't get a chance to say it the other day, but my jacket suits you."
I rolled my eyes up at him, doing my best to be impervious to our sudden closeness. I wasn't succeeding. "Not really. It's too big."
"Yes really," he insisted, bowing his head slightly towards mine. "It looks way better on you than it ever did on me."
"Where's Riku and Rayne?" Sora interjected and I turned my head to look at him.
"They-" my words tripped over my tongue as Lea pressed a tender kiss to my temple.
Critical hit, captain! Shields down to thirty percent, but holding!
Ignoring the heat rushing to my face, I did my best to regather my scattered thoughts. "They, uh⌠they're back in the, uh⌠theâŚ" Drat, what was the word again? "...car! They're back in the⌠the car."
Sora pulled a face. "Swapping spit, no doubt."
"Oh-ho, we'll see about that! C'mon, Sora!" Kairi cackled with an evil gleam in her eye, slipping free of her boyfriend's hold to instead grab his hand and pull him behind her as she ran off towards Riku's car.
"Seriously," Lea spoke up again, his voice hushed as I slowly returned my gaze to his. "Pretty sure I've lost all claim to that jacket. It belongs to you now."
My eyelids drooped. "That's not how that works."
"Sure it is." He rested his forehead against mine and I could feel his thumb rubbing light circles against the fabric of my dress just above my hip. "You don't choose a leather jacket, it chooses you. And trust me, that one has definitely picked you over me."
I gave a soft snort. "I'm giving it back to you after tonight."
"Don't you dare," he chided, his breath warming my lips. "You'll hurt the jacket's feelings."
"Stop anthropomorphizing the jacket." I was fighting a smile now.
"Make me," he murmured, something in his voice causing my insides to do that whole warm, fuzzy, squishy thing.
And the academy award for best leading actor in the role of Elsa's boyfriend goes to this guy right here.
But had to say, I thought he might be overdoing it a bit. I mean, Sora and Kairi weren't even around anymore to hear any of this. And if we were being monitored by someone under my great uncle's payroll, they certainly couldn't hear it either. I suppose Lea just⌠really liked getting into character?
Clearing my throat, I unclasped my hands from behind his neck and shifted them down to his chest in an attempt to push myself free of his grasp as I whispered, "We, ah⌠should probably go speak to the hostess now."
However, his hold on me didn't loosen, his arms remaining firmly secured around my waist. He didn't say anything, just continued to grin down at me. His eyes became hooded as they flicked down to my lips now, making my heart skip a beat.
What was he-?
A sudden loud yelp ruptured the air around us.
Rayne.
Followed by an annoyed yell of, "Goddamnit, Sora! Kairi!"
And that would be Riku.
The two delinquents in question blurred past us and towards the restaurant's front doors, whooping and snickering and razzing their tongues back at their victims climbing out of the Ford Focus. "We'll grab us a table!" Sora called quickly at the same time Kairi shouted, "See ya inside!" Then they both disappeared through the entrance with Rayne and Riku hot on their heels.
I heard Lea sigh. Or maybe he didn't. It was so soft that it was fully possible that I imagined it. Then he released me, slipping one hand into mine and jerking a thumb towards the restaurant with a lopsided smile, "Shall we?"
I stared at him, feeling the night air cool my warmed face. Then I gave a tentative nod and let him lead me inside.
The others hadn't made it far past the doors and we stepped in to find Riku doling out Sora's punishment: death by a thousand noogies. Sora was smacking his cousin's arm and trying to wriggle free, but to no avail. Apparently Kairi had gotten off with only a warning for she was standing off to one side with Rayne, both cracking up as they watched the boys. I looked past them, taking in the restaurant. Strings of fairy lights hung from the ceiling intermixed with strings of multi-colored papers, each bearing cutouts depicting various imagery. The walls were painted with murals of fantastical, mythical creatures of various shapes and sizes with wings and prismatic fur, feathers and scales. This place was absolutely beautiful.
Once the roughhousing had finally settled down, we all approached the hostess, an extremely tiny, extremely old lady wearing a name tag that read Coco who seemed far more interested in napping than greeting new customers. However, she woke up long enough to squint at her list and find our reservation before calling over a man to seat us. He led us through the restaurant and to a large booth in one of the back corners, leaving menus, chips and salsa on the table before flashing us a warm, genuine smile and saying he'd be back to take our orders in a minute.
I started shrugging out of the jacket, feeling Lea assist me before folding it over his arm and gesturing towards the booth with bow and a, "Lady's first." Smiling at him, I took a seat and scooched towards the middle. Lea wasn't too far behind, sitting close enough for our knees to bump against one another. He tossed the jacket on the back shelf of the booth before draping his arm across the top of the cushioned seat behind my head. Rayne took the spot to my left with Riku of course beside her, and on the other side of Lea sat Kairi and Sora. The waiter came back after giving us a little time to peruse the menus and he gathered our food requests before dashing off again.
"So Ray," Kairi piped up, popping a heavily salsa-laden chip into her mouth, "how's the preggers-life treating you?"
"Really well," she nodded contentedly, one hand going to her tummy. "The jellybean's happy and healthy so far and I've just started barely showing in the past couple weeks. No weird food cravings yet, thank god, but those are supposed to be right around the corner."
Sora leaned forward, propping his chin in both hands and beamed, "Do we know yet if I have a lil nephew or niece on the way?"
"We're cousins, Sora. Nephews and nieces would only be if we were brothers," Riku corrected with a wry curve to his lips.
"We don't know yet," Rayne shook her head, "but I'm about four months along now, so hoping to find out at our next appointment."
Lea had shifted his hand to dangle down so he could idly twiddle my braid between his fingers. I could also sense his gaze on me, causing a bit of a flutter in the pit of my stomach. Reminding myself he was just playing a part and it wasn't real, I resisted the urge to squirm and instead pretended not to notice, directing all my focus into reaching for a chip to dip into the salsa.
"Well whatever the wee monkey turns out to be, you can bet Auntie Kairi and Unkie Sora will be here to shower it with all the love and kisses!" Kairi cooed.
Riku twitched and frowned. "I just said that isn't how it-"
"Shush, hon, they're just teasing you now," Rayne poked his cheek with a laugh before looking back over at Kairi. "And you? How's the new gig over at Mickey's going? You've been there, what? About a week now?"
"Mm-hm! It's been a lot of fun working the jewelry counter. Oh sure, there's the occasional asshole customer, but turns out I'm really good at killing them with kindness."
Riku kicked Sora's foot under the table, "What about you, ya freeloader? Any prospects yet?"
He shrugged with that big smile he seemed to always have permanently glued to his face. Just looking at it was starting to make my cheeks hurt. "Couple of interviews coming up, so we'll see!"
Smirking, Riku said, "Can't wait to hear how you screw them up this time, knucklehead."
"Hey!"
Kairi turned to look our direction now. "So what's new and exciting with you two, hm? Lea, you just had that big test, right?" Silence was her answer as I went for another chip. "Lea? Hello, earth to... ah-ha, there!" She rocketed up to her feet, slamming one hand down on the table and pointing the other right in Lea's face. "Lost puppy look!"
"Hm, what now?" he jolted, his hand jerking away from my braid to lay across the booth backrest once more. "Lost pup-? Bah, I told you already, there's no lost puppy look. You need to get your eyes checked, princess."
She scoffed, plopping heavily back down into her seat and smugly take a sip of her soda. "Please. You were bad at hiding it when you guys were dating in secret, and you're even worse at it now that it's all out in the open."
"What's the deal there anyhow?" Sora cocked his head at me. "There's all sorts of wild rumors flying around the mall, like that you're runaway royalty from some far off country just living off the lam now."
"What?!" I blanched, gawking in disbelief. Doing my best to recover with a tiny, awkward laugh, I hastily said, "No, nothing quite so, ah⌠dramatic. My parents, they're⌠well off, to be sure, but certainly not royalty. And not from so far away either. Just Arendelle, which is only about an hour north of here."
Chewing on her straw, Kairi eagerly leaned in closer, "I'd love to hear the story of how you two met!"
I stiffened.
Fudge.
Welp, add that to my ever growing list of things I should have thought about in advance but failed miserably to do so. I fiddled a chip between my fingers as I tucked in my bottom lip. Shoot, what was I supposed to tell her? It's not like I'd gotten any better at lying in the past few days since my visit with Father. In fact, I'd been mostly skirting by since then by dodging questions and letting people fill in the blanks for themselves so I didn't have to. Heart thudding in my chest, I opened my mouth, not quite fully sure yet what was going to come out.
"Last summer," Lea was quicker. "In another city."
"Oh, during that big cross-country road trip you took?" Rayne asked him as she leaned into her husband who slung an arm around her shoulders.
Lea tapped his own nose, "That'd be the one, Raindrop."
Kairi gasped, "You two met in a foreign city? How romantic! That's the dream!"
"You have to leave the country in order for it to be a foreign city," Riku shook his head.
"Cram it, you knew what I meant!"
"It was like one of those scenes straight outta a movie," Lea planted an elbow on the table, rubbing a curled finger over his smirk as he watched me out of the corner of his eye. "There I was, just strolling along minding my own business, smack dab in the middle of a jam-packed city street. But then the crowd parted and there she stood. The most gorgeous creature to ever walk the face of this or any other planet in all the cosmos."
Cue my face turning all new shades of red never before witnessed in the history of human eyesight.
Jeez, laying it on a bit thick there, Lea, don't you think?
"So whatdja do?" Kairi pressed, eyes bright and on the edge of her seat. "Sweep her off her feet right then and there?"
He snerked, "Shit no, I walked headfirst into a lamppost."
I smothered a grin behind my hand as the rest of the table erupted into laughter. Sora reached over to punch him lightly in the arm, "Smooth, ya stud. What city was this anyway?"
"Corona," I was the one to answer, surprising myself. Suddenly self-conscious with all eyes turning to me, I quietly added, "I was there for part of my vacation last year."
"By yourself?" Rayne quirked a dubious eyebrow at me. She knew this story was as made-up as my current relationship status was. I could only assume she was trying to poke holes in order to help us solidify this little tale that was being spun so we'd be more prepared for the next time we had to tell the lie.
The thing is, the best lies have a grain of truth to them. I really had been in Corona last summer. "No, I was taking the trip with Anna. We were actually staying over in Traverse Town, but had planned to visit Corona for the day to enjoy a festival there, since it was only a short train ride away. However, Anna disappeared with a guy before we could go. I'd really been looking forward to this festival though and didn't want to miss it, so I took the train over on my own."
"Wait," Kairi slapped both hands down in front of her, eyes widening. "Are you talking about that big lantern festival they do every year?" At my nod, she squealed. "Lucky! Punzie has shown me pictures in magazines, it looks so goddamn pretty! Oh man, I've always wanted to go! Hint, hint," she shouldered Sora, who just chuckled and scratched the back of his head.
"It was actually right as they were launching the lanterns that I saw her," Lea said, folding his arms atop the table now. "She was wearing this cute sundress. White with a lil diamond patterned hem. Split sleeves that were all flowy. Hair down and dancing in the slight breeze." Wow, he was really selling this. He'd even nailed that whole far away look in his eye, like he was seeing something the rest of us couldn't. "And the way those lanterns lit up her smile as she watched them float up, I knew my lowly mortal self was in the presence of a goddess. Knocked the wind right outta me."
"As did that lamppost," Rayne sniggered.
"As did that lamppost," he agreed with a chuckle.
Totally enthralled now, Kairi breathed, "So what happened next?"
"Yeah, what did happen next?" I grinned over at him, the barest note of a challenge to my tone. To the others, it probably just sounded like I was teasing him since obviously I was already supposed to know this story. But now I was almost as invested as Kairi and was genuinely curious where he'd go with it next.
The corners of his eyes crinkled as he looked over at me and he leaned back, propping his elbows up on the back rim of the booth and once more slipping an arm behind my head. "Well after the lantern bit was over, I watched her get onto her train heading back to Traverse Town. So I did what any self-respecting, red-blooded, utterly bewitched male would do: I followed her."
"Stalker," Riku singsonged.
His wife smacked his leg, "Hush, it's sweet!"
He snorted, eyelids drooping, "Yeah, so sweet, the dumbass left his car behind in Corona."
"Psssh, I just took the train back for it later," Lea brushed off. "Anyway, when I found her on board, I sat across from her and worked up the nerve to strike up a conversation."
Rayne looked at me. "You? Talk to a handsome stranger on a train?" She squinted, repeating for emphasis, "You?"
"Heh⌠what can I say? He can be very charming," I smiled down at my drink, swirling the ice with my straw.
"Even with all of my roguish charm and devilish good looks though, it wasn't easy," Lea laughed. His hand had drifted down to start toying with my braid again. "But she warmed up to me eventually. By the time we arrived at Traverse Town, I was completely smitten. A total goner. She still needed more convincing though, so I managed to persuade her into joining me for a night out on the town. Luckily for me, Traverse Town has a very active night life that goes on for hours long after most other cities have gone to sleep."
"Yeah? Like what?" Sora burbled out around a mouth full of chips, making Kairi giggle as she put a hand over his face to hide it.
He pursed his lips to one side, looking up at the ceiling, "Oh, nothing too exciting. Few odds and ends here and there though⌠wandering around a record store⌠a cafĂŠ with a palm reader⌠a street poet at one sidewalk corner, a belly dancer at another, some stargazing in a parkâŚ" Now he smirked over at me, "A carnival with a kiss at the top of the ferris wheel."
A mock gasp from Rayne, "Scandal! And you with a fiancĂŠ, young lady!"
I looked away, suddenly feeling guilty and flustered over something that hadn't even really happened. "...ferris wheels can be very enchanting."
And my streak of helping the lie along while not actually lying myself successfully continues!
"And then, and then?" Kairi insisted impatiently, just eating this whole bit of fiction right up.
He chuckled and shrugged, "Just mostly a lot of meandering the streets and talking. We were out all night and watched the sunrise together. Eventually, she had to go meet up with her sister so they could move on to another city for the next leg of their lil vay-kay. But I didn't let her leave without agreeing to meet with me again in a few months."
Kairi was slackjaw now as she whispered, "And did she?"
"Mm-hm!" he hummed happily. "And from there, we kept meeting up, our little get-togethers getting longer and more frequent over time."
"Then what?" She was relentless.
A wolfish curl tugged at one side of his mouth. "What else? I slowly seduced her until she fell helpless into my bed, hungry for the pleasure only I could give her," he waggled his eyebrows.
Of course I'd chosen that exact second to be taking a sip of my drink. And of course I promptly spluttered and choked on it. "Excuse me?" I coughed, laughing incredulously as I elbowed him in the gut.
He gave a pained grunt, but grinned and snagged my hand before I could retract it, pressing a kiss to my knuckles. "I mean that in the most gentlemanly and respectful way possible, of course," he winked at me before looking back over at Kairi. "From there, I convinced her to run away from her family and ditch her two-bit, loser fiancĂŠ to be with me. And the rest, as they say, is history!"
"Wow!" she sighed dreamily, slumping back and fanning herself. Then she blinked, "WaitâŚ" A gasp. "Oh my god! You swore off dating about a year ago, which was last summer! Was it cuz that's when you two met and it was love at first sight?!"
"Huh. The two certainly seem to line up perfectly, don't they?" he chirped. He'd rested my hand back down onto the table, his on top of mine, threading our fingers together.
Our waiter popped up again just then. "Your food will be just another moment. In the meantime, please allow us to entertain you with some music." He then turned, clapped his hands twice and called out, "Miguel!"
Out charged a boy in his early teens wearing a red hoodie and lugging a guitar that was white, etched in swirly patterns, and nearly as big as he was. He flashed us a smile huge enough to rival one of Sora's and without further preamble, started strumming away and singing. The kid was actually really good too!
Kairi clapped in delight and Rayne cooed over how adorable he was. Sora gaped in awe at the boy's obvious talent while Riku just grinned, digging into the chips. As I watched him perform, I couldn't help but feel Lea's eyes on me once more instead of on our little musician. I shifted in my seat, slipping my hand free of his and bringing it up to tuck some bangs behind my ear, hiding the growing warmth I felt in my cheeks behind my fingers.
At this rate, I didn't know how I was going to survive fake dating this guy for the rest of the evening, let alone for two more weeks.

"Where do you think you're going?"
Lea's hand closed around mine, stopping me in my tracks. I glanced over my shoulder at him, then back towards where Rayne and Riku were climbing into their car across the parking lot. "With them?"
"Ahhhnt," he made a buzzer noise, grinning. "Wrong! Would the contestant care to venture another guess?"
I gave him some side-eye, feeling one corner of my lips turn up. "...with you?"
"Bingo!" He started walking towards his car, gently tugging me along with him. "I was already so rudely denied my god-given right as the boyfriend to pick you up from your place. No way am I missing out on giving you a lift over to the movie theater. Same goes for driving you back home later tonight, so better make your peace with it now. It's happening."
I felt my smile twitch a fraction wider as I fell into step beside him. "I suppose being my chauffeur is quite the honor and privilege. Wouldn't want to take that away from you."
"Glad that's settled then," he gave a chipper nod, unlocking the front passenger door of his vehicle and holding it open for me as I got in. As he then jogged over to the driver's side while I buckled in, there was a loud meep meep of a car horn and I looked up just as a hot pink Jeep blurred past where we were parked - Kairi and Sora, it seemed, going on to the cinema ahead of us. I waved at them just as Lea had settled in himself and started the engine.
"So," I began once we were on the road, resting my temple against my knuckles with my elbow propped on the window sill, still grinning as I watched him out of the corner of my eye, "you took a road trip last summer?"
He gave a low hum of confirmation, reaching over to turn down the volume on the rock oldies station coming through the radio. "Decided to have one last big adventure before I really buckled down and started taking school seriously. Did a lil soul searching, that whole shtick."
"Ah." My gaze focused on the road ahead once more and I hesitated for a second, gnawing on my lower lip. "...that was a nice story you told. About how we met."
Lea chuckled, leaving one hand on the wheel while moving the other to lay atop the headrest of my seat. "Liked it, didja?"
"Oh definitely." Now I hid my growing smile behind my hand, trying to keep a straight face. "Though I have to admit, I think I was a bigger fan of the original movie adaptation."
I watched him visibly stiffen. "The�"
Tapping a curled finger to my chin, I muttered, "What was the title again? Before Sunrise, I believe?"
He snerked, then broke out into a full laugh. "Crap, ya caught me. Yeah, I may have borrowed from the plot there a tad."
"Just a bit," I shook my head at him. "You're lucky Sora and Kairi haven't seen the film."
"Kinda surprised you have," he turned the car down a road that would take us towards the mall. "Pretty sure it's older than you are."
"Nothing wrong with old movies," I shrugged before wrinkling my nose at him slightly with a tiny smile. "Kind of sappy though. Wouldn't have thought that'd be your kind of movie."
Looking my way, he smirked, "What can I say? I'm a sappy guy. And hey, at least I didn't steal everything from that flick."
"True. The stuff before the train was all you."
"You helped," Lea pointed out as he pulled up to a stop sign. He then tapped his index against the steering wheel a couple times. "...outta curiosity, why'd you say Corona? Out of all the other places you must of visited on your trip, what made you pick that city?"
As the car accelerated once more, I tilted my head in thought. "Don't know really⌠I guess I just felt it would be a nice place to meet someone new in. That'd it make for a good story." I paused, watching some tail lights streak past us. "...the lantern festival really was beautiful. Have you ever seen it?"
Lea shook his head as he glanced up at the rearview before shifting lanes, "Nah. Had plans to on the road trip, but something else came up."
"A shame," I sighed wistfully. "You missed out."
"Wouldn't say that," he murmured, a warm flicker in his eyes. "'Sides, there's always next time."
"Suppose that's true," I nodded. "Nice touch, by the way, describing the dress I was wearing. I think I might even own one that's pretty close to it." Don't think I'd been wearing it in Corona though. But I couldn't really remember. It had been over a year ago after all.
He laughed again, fingers combing his scalp before returning the hand to my seat, now on a spot next to my ear. "Well, I did help you pack your clothes from your old condo just a couple days ago. I probably saw it then."
"Good point." That made sense. It would have been too much of a coincidence if that'd actually been what I'd had on that day. But now⌠should I be worried that I hadn't really been in that dress? What if someone found out the mismatch in the story? No⌠no, that was just me overthinking things again. Even if the tale ever reached the ears of the Duke's goon, it's not like they could go back in time to fact check. "Just one more thing now." My eyes narrowed at him, at odds with my grin. "Might want to edit the ending a bit."
"Which part?" he asked a touch too innocently, already turning us into the Dusk Town Center parking lot. "Running away to be with me? Hasn't that been the story all along?"
I rolled my eyes at him. "Try a little before that."
Wouldn't have thought it possible to both purse one's lips and smile at the same time, but Lea proved me wrong in that moment. "Hmm⌠oh! Well, figured wooing you over the course of months sounded more believable, but if you think it works better as weeks or even days, then-"
"No no. Little after that."
"Well then, now you got me stumped cuz I know you just couldn't possibly be talking about the absolute masterpiece that was the slow seducing, helpless bed falling, pleasure hungry part."
A snort. "Why yes, actually, I could be talking about that and in fact am."
"But that's the best part!" he protested, turning to park in a space right next to a familiar Ford Focus. "It's the heart and soul, the very essence of the story! The pièce de rÊsistance, the crowning glory."
With a good natured scoff, I unfastened my seatbelt as the car shuddered into powering down. "Well decrown it because you're dropping that bit."
He lifted his chin slightly and gave a dignified sniff, "I am a storyteller, El. An arteest. You wouldn't ask Leonardo da Vinci to remove the smile from the Mona Lisa."
Well someone had a high opinion of himself. Which honestly came as zero surprise. I fixed him with a dull stare. "Drop it or your jacket gets a giant, sticky stain before the night is out." And with that, I opened my door.
Lea scrambled out of the car and rushed over to join me on my side just as I slammed the door shut behind me. He had the decency to only spend a couple seconds looking mildly miffed at having been denied the opportunity to open and hold the car door for me before his frown melted into a smile once more. "Jeez, blackmail? Never thought you'd stoop so low. But eh," he shrugged, "jacket's black, it'll be fine."
"You're failing to see the big picture here," I crossed my arms as I waited for Rayne and Riku to get out of their own vehicle. My guess was they were probably going for another round of Seven Minutes in Heaven in there. Smirking at Lea, I elaborated, "Because then I'll wash it."
"Egads," he mocked gasp, splaying a hand against his chest, "the horror."
My smirk curled wickedly. "In a washing machine."
As my roomies finally vacated their car (faces flushed, I might add), Lea actually paled. "But it's dry clean only!"
"That's right," I said smugly and turned to walk away. "So nix that line or the jacket gets it."
"You fight dirty," he muttered as he caught up to me, slipping his hand into mine. However, he was grinning.
Huh. That wasn't what I'd been expecting. IE the face of a man who'd just suffered a crippling defeat by my hands.
I narrowed my eyes up at him. "You certainly seem pretty happy about the impending, inevitable demise of your jacket."
Now the grin was joined by a dimple as we walked. "Well, it's just that in order for you to make good on your threat, you have to take my jacket hostage. Meaning you're gonna hafta keep it after all." His head dipped down closer to mine as he swung our hands slightly. "I count that as a win for me."
...well crud.
Score one for Lea there.
Shrieks and giggles suddenly erupted behind us before Sora tore past us towards the mall's entrance with Kairi riding piggyback. Rayne laughed and tugged Riku into a stumble behind her so they could catch up while Lea and I continued to take our time, bringing up the rear.
We made our way through the food court and over to Cinema XIII. The manager with long, silver hair that I'd seen there last time was present again, off to one side where he was setting up a huge cardboard display for the latest Star Wars movie. I watched him scowl and fiddle with the lifesize lightsaber cutouts as our group purchased tickets from a blonde chick with a weird hairdo that kind of resembled antennae. As we'd approached, I could have sworn I'd seen her boredly cleaning her fingernails with a small knife, but there was no sign of the blade by the time we'd reached her register. Perhaps my eyes had just been playing tricks on me.
Tickets for our whodunit comedy flick in hand, we then moved over to concessions which was being worked by that same teen with the emo haircut that I'd also spotted here a couple weeks ago. He hardly glanced up from the book he was reading as Riku and Rayne ordered snacks and drinks from him, Sora waiting in line behind them with Kairi still latched onto his back.
"Alright, whatcha want? My treat," Lea asked as he watched the flat screens hanging behind the counter scroll flashy ads for crisp, buttery popcorn and fizzing, bubbly soda.
I blinked. "What?" Then I frowned at him. "Oh no, not happening. You already paid for dinner despite my multiple protests. I'm not letting you buy me candy too."
We were only fake dating after all, and I wouldn't even want to make a real boyfriend pay for everything!
"But it's my right as-"
I put my finger to his lips, silencing him as my eyelids drooped. "Enough with playing the boyfriend card already. You're having too much fun with that."
He puckered up and planted a tiny peck on my fingertip, sending a small jolt straight to my heart as I quickly jerked my hand back. He chuckled, "Just tell me what your fave candy is."
"Shouldn't you be able to guess?" I arched an eyebrow, stubbornly ignoring the way the tip of my finger still had a slight tingle. "Isn't that like your special gift or whatever?"
"Only with ice cream," he lightly corrected.
"Right," I crinkled my eyes at him. "How's that coming along again?"
His shoulders bobbed up and down. "It's a process."
"My turn!" Sora suddenly proclaimed loudly in front of us, dropping Kairi off his back and spinning around to get behind her.
His girlfriend gasped, "Sora no!"
"Sora yes!" he cackled, jumping onto her back, arms hugging her shoulders tight and legs wrapping around her waist as her hands automatically shifted to grasp beneath his knees. To her credit, she managed to stand for three whole shaky seconds before collapsing beneath her boyfriend's weight into a tangled heap on the floor with him.
Ah, to be young.
Never mind the fact that I was pretty sure I was only like a year older than them.
With a soft snort through my nose, I glanced back at Lea. "Well, while you keep processing, I'm going to go find our seats."
I turned to go, but he pulled me back with the hold he still had on my hand. "C'mon, just lemme buy ya something small," he insisted as he hopped over the Sora/Kairi knot that was still trying to disentangle itself, forcing me to gingerly step over the two of them as well.
Shaking my head with a sigh, I said, "Why won't you just let it go?"
He beamed. "Cuz what schmoopsie-poo wants, schmoopsie-poo gets."
Oh no he didn't.
"Uh-uh, no. Veto. You are not calling me that," I jabbed a finger into his chest.
There was a sly gleam to his eye. "Tell me what candy you want or I won't stop."
"You wouldn't dare."
"Wanna bet?" he flashed a toothy grin as we stepped up to the counter now that my roommates had stepped off to one side, already munching away at their newly purchased sweets. "You'll think you died and went to schmoopsie-poo heaven."
I gave a small huff and looked away. "Small price to pay. Not budging on this."
"Fine. You've forced my hand." He turned his head to the concession worker, slapping his palm down on the countertop and proudly declaring, "I'll have one of everything, my good man!"
"What?! No, no, stop, he's joking," I hastily told the cashier, who froze mid-ringing the order up as he gave us a flat look with the one blue eye not hidden behind bangs. To Lea, I whispered, "What do you think you're doing?"
He shrugged, grin not faltering. "Figure ya gotta like at least one of 'em."
I stared at him. Then my shoulders slumped and I hung my head, grumbling, "...Junior Mints."
"You heard the lady," he chirped to the theatre employee. "And throw in a small popcorn and large Kupo-Kola too please!"
Once the junk food was acquired and paid for, we moved out of the way to join Riku and Rayne as Sora and Kairi bought their own goodies. While we were waiting, I opened up my candy and reached inside, retrieving a minty, chocolate-coated treat and popping it into my mouth.
"Can I have one?" Lea asked beside me.
I gave him a blank look. Then I glanced down at his hands, otherwise occupied with a full soda cup and a bag practically bursting with popcorn. Digging another Junior Mint out and holding it up between us, my gaze met his once more. "Say ahh."
Face brightening, his lips parted wide.
I inserted it into his nostril.
He blinked a couple times, then snorted which had the byproduct of dislodging the Junior Mint. "Okay, guess maybe I deserved that for being a lil pushy about getting you the candy."
"You most certainly did," I said matter-of-factly, eating another one. A pause while I slowly chewed before swallowing and mumbling, "...but thanks for doing it anyway."
"Heh. Don't mention it."
Kairi and Sora rejoined us then, arms piled high with sugary delights. Jeez, all that on top of the gigantic Mexican dinners they'd both devoured less than an hour ago? One had to wonder how the two of them managed to stay so skinny.
It didn't take long for us to locate our theater and when we entered, all the lights were dimmed for the trailers that had already started to play. We quietly found our seats close to the middle of the auditorium and we settled into them, Lea to the right of me and making up one end of our group while Rayne took up my other side, the rest of the gang to her right. It seemed the cinema had recently renovated with new, barely-used cushiony sofa seating, the kind that reclined.
As I pushed the button that popped out the chair's footrest and made myself more comfortable, I caught a glimpse of the others. Half way through a strand of red licorice, Rayne flinched when Riku was suddenly in her face and chomping down on the other end of the candy. Grinning, he took a few more bites, bringing their lips closer together until he could give her a smooch before pulling away, looking quite pleased with himself as she blushed and snerked, giving his shoulder a light shove. Kairi was tossing Milk Duds towards Sora's open, awaiting mouth and rewarding him with little kisses every time he successfully caught one.
Worrying my lower lip between my teeth, I glanced towards Lea out of the corner of my eye as he crunched away on some popcorn. Should we be acting allâŚÂ couply right now? Like the others were? I mean, it was a dark theater⌠did we really need to keep the act up in here too? Would anyone really notice? Then again, I'd noticed our friends being all sickeningly cute and I hadn't even been trying to, my eyes had just wandered. So maybe it wasn't such a stretch to consider the two of us were also possibly being observed, even in here.
My gaze flicked down to the armrest I shared with Lea. It was wide enough for both our arms to lay on it side by side, elbows touching. He wasn't holding my hand at the moment, instead just resting his about an inch away from mine. Which, now that I noticed, actually felt a bit weird, oddly enough. I guess I was starting to get used to it. But perhaps I should look at this as an opportunity for some more practice. An exercise in me being the one for once to initiate a display of affection. I seriously couldn't get away with him being the one to start it all the time, right? Surely, I had to act like I liked him too.
Which, to be fair, I kind of did.
Even if it was a secret.
But now I had to wonder how does one go about, ah⌠what was the term? ...making a move? I'd never had to do it with my ex. I'd never particularly felt the urge, nor had he ever really encouraged me to have more initiative in that area. He'd always been the one to take charge and that seemed to be the way he'd liked it. It seemed to be what was expected of our relationship, by him, by my family, by the world of upper society that I had lived in for so long. But I was no longer in that world. Things were different here. I was different. And I needed to show that to my parents. And one way I could show that was by doing this.
So then⌠exactly how do I do this?
...well I suppose I could start by moving my hand in the general direction of his. Seemed simple enough⌠right?
Gulping and holding my breath, I slowly, oh so very slowly started reaching for his hand. As my fingers crept closer, the pounding in my ribcage grew louder and louder. A hairbreadth away from skin contact, I hesitated, what little courage I'd mustered already dwindling. But after a second, my face hardened. I needed to do this. For the sake of Operation Boyfriend But Shh Not Really. For the sake of a continued future free from my parents' control. With a newfound resolve burning in my chest, I pushed on.
My pinky barely brushed against his knuckle.
Nope! No way. Mm-mm, not happening!
I snatched my hand back, blushing furiously.
The blush of a failure. Pathetic.
However the touch, no matter how light and brief, hadn't gone unnoticed. Lea glanced my way, his head tipping slightly. Then he smiled, shifting his popcorn out of his lap over to his right while moving the soda from the cupholder between us to the one on his other side. Then he lifted the armrest separating us, folding it back between our chairs before slinging an arm around my shoulders and pulling me close so my head was pillowed by his chest.
I tensed for several seconds before relaxing against him, clearing my throat and, if possible, blushing even harder.
Well then.
Guess I no longer needed to worry about us not looking couply.
Even if I hadn't been the one to initiate.
...tomorrow. I would do a better job tomorrow.
As the last of the trailers ended and opening credits for the movie began filling the big screen, Lea ducked his head down next to mine. I could feel him grinning against my ear as he whispered, "This boyfriend model comes equipped with all the latest technology, including hilarious movie commentary. Would you like that feature enabled now?"
I leaned my head back a bit as I turned to look him in the eye. He cocked a playful eyebrow at me. Feeling one corner of my lips tug up, I whispered back, "Commentary on."
"You got it."
I was not disappointed.

"Is this really totally necessary?"
"Oh absolutely. Your uncle's spies could be anywhere, ever vigilant and watching at all times."
"Even here? In the parking lot for my own apartment?" I frowned dubiously.
I could feel him nodding against my hair. "Especially here. I'll have you know I've seen at least three cars pass us already, each one more suspicious and shady than the last."
Date night had been a rousing success, if I did say so myself. We'd had a good time with friends, dinner was amazing and delicious, and the movie had been excellent. But as everyone knows, all good dates (even the fake ones) must come to an end. And at the end of every date, some sort of goodnight ritual is often at the very least customary, if not absolutely essential. Traditionally, this usually takes the form of the infamous goodnight kiss. However, since I'd already taken any sort of liplock completely and one hundred percent off the table, Lea had instead opted for a hug.
One⌠extremely and uncomfortably long hug.
...okay, that was a lie. It wasn't uncomfortable at all. In fact, was actually quite nice. Pleasant, even. Ten out of ten, would recommend.
We stood next to his car at the moment, my apartment building just a few yards away. After he'd parked and we'd both climbed out, he'd pulled my arms up to wrap around his neck, his hands once again finding their way under the leather jacket to encircle my waist, hugging me close as he'd rested his cheek atop my head. And so we had remained for quite some time now.
Kairi and Sora were no longer with us, having parted ways back at the mall, but I could see Rayne and Riku off to one side near their own vehicle, enthusiastically taking part in some cuddle time themselves while they waited for me. Which actually I really appreciated. Without their added presence here, I'd probably be getting a lot more awkward a lot more quickly about The Hug That Would Not End.
That saidâŚ
"We've been at this for at least five minutes now. Wouldn't you call that a bit, er.." I shifted my feet, resisting the urge to squirm, "...excessive?"
His hold on me didn't budge. "Gotta be convincing. 'Sides, we're obviously still in the honeymoon period of our relationship. You know, when the couple takes forever and a day telling each other goodbye a thousand times before actually leaving. Otherwise known as the No-You-Hang-Up-First phase."
My brow furrowed. "I thought that was only made-up for TV. Real people don't actually do that, do they?"
"Yup," I felt another nod. "Trust me, I'm an expert. I know these things."
I squinted off into space. "...haven't you only ever done one night stands?"
"Shush, I said trust me on this," he murmured.
And shush I did. I suppose I could look at this as a sort of⌠endurance training? Get me more used to his hugs so I'd be less awkward about them in public? Make them seem more natural? Yeah, okay. This might be good for me. Let's see how long I could keep this up.
...answer? Not long.
Tentatively trying to pull away, I began, "Alright, maybe we should-"
"One more minute," he insisted, squeezing me tighter and shifting his head down now to instead nuzzle against my neck. His nose was cold and his breath tickled against my skin, making my cheeks warm. Welp, so much for not squirming.
Huh. He really seemed to be taking this whole pretend boyfriend thing very seriously. This was some extreme dedication to the role.
And there my insides went all over again, doing the whole warm, fuzzy, squishy thing. Alright, just breathe. Deep, calming breaths. Remember: Conceal, don't feel.
...maybe just focus on the concealing part. The not feeling part was already a lost cause.
"Ya know," Rayne's voice suddenly piped up nearby, causing me to jump, "maybe you two don't have to say goodnight just yet." Lea straightened up, loosening his grip on me just enough for us both to turn our heads to see she'd joined us. Gracing us with a sly smirk, she said, "I mean, if you want to really drive this date home for any eyes that might be prying, Lea could always, ya know..." her eyebrows bounced as she leaned in closer to whisper conspiratorially, "stay the night."
"What?!" My face erupted into blistering heat, the likes of which would've put the Sahara Desert to utter shame. "N...No! Absolutely not! How could you possibly even-"
She laughed, her finger booping my nose. "Relax, you silly goose. Of course he'd only sleep on the living room sofa! S'not like your grunkle's minion would have x-ray vision into our home."
Oh.
That's what she'd meant.
Well of course that's what she'd meant. It's not like she'd ever really suggestâŚ
Actually, no, this was Rayne we were talking about here. I honestly wouldn't have put it past her.
She elbowed Lea in the arm, "So whaddya say, stud?"
He smiled, removing one hand from my waist to rub at the nape of his neck. "Well, I'd planned on getting some reading done for my classes tonight. But I do have my book bag in the backseat, so I suppose I could just as easily read here on your couch." His gaze shifted back down to mine, "That is of course, as long as you're okay with it!"
My face still recovering from its abrupt and devastating heatwave, I looked down and muttered, "Well, I⌠I suppose, ah⌠sure. Okay. I mean, just to keep up appearances⌠" My eyes flicked back up towards Rayne, "Thanks. I guess that's⌠actually a pretty good idea."
"Of course it is! I came up with it!" she beamed, planting her fists on her hips and puffing up her chest. Then she turned back to her husband, pressing her lips to his cheek as she linked her arm in his and led him over to the building entrance. Lea at last fully released me, but only long enough to unlock his car and pull out a messenger bag that looked heavy with textbooks. Kicking the door shut, he slung the strap of the bag over his head to hang across his chest before slipping an arm around my shoulders, grinning down at me as we followed the other two inside.
Once in our apartment, he removed the arm while Rayne pulled some spare pillows and bed sheets from the closet, tossing them onto the longest couch for Lea. Then grabbing a water bottle from the fridge, she unscrewed the cap and held her drink up high. "A toast! To Lea's sleepover! May it be the first of many!" she declared before tossing her head back to chug half the bottle.
Riku just snerked, shaking his head while Lea scratched his cheek with a weak chuckle and walked over to drop his bag on the sofa next to the blankets. I squeezed my eyes shut, pressing my fingers between my eyebrows with a soft sigh. Still, she had a point. I suppose it was only natural for my "boyfriend" to stay the night with some amount of frequency. Oh gosh, I hope this wouldn't be too much of an imposition on Lea.
As Rayne recapped the water bottle and put it down on the kitchen table, Riku stepped up to her, taking both her hands in his and pressing their foreheads together. "Hon, why don't we head to bed early tonight?" he asked, tone low and eyes hooded.
"Mmm," she breathed him in, smiling up at him through lowered lashes and nodding, "sounds good." As he pulled her towards their bedroom, Rayne glanced back at us. "Good night, you two! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" she winked and waved before disappearing through the door, closing it behind her.
Silence followed. It felt strangely sudden and almost deafening.
I slowly turned to look at Lea.
He looked back, giving me a tiny smile.
That's when it struck me.
This was the first time in two full days I'd been alone with Lea. Like, really alone. Not in public, not where we had to put on the boyfriend-girlfriend act. Even when it'd just been the two of us in his car earlier tonight, even then we'd still had kind of been in the relative safety of pretend date mode. Besides, driving around in a car was completely different from being alone with him here, now, in my apartment late at night. Now that there was no more reason for all the hand holding, forehead kisses, and other little touches, things felt⌠well I wouldn't exactly say wrong per se, but more felt just kind of⌠off?
Panic was beginning to set in.
My mind was drawing a total blank.
I⌠didn't know how to be around him now. Not when we didn't have to fake a relationship anymore.
I'd forgotten how to act normal.
I think he could sense it too. The weirdness that had suddenly popped up out of nowhere. His eyebrows knit together, his gaze shifting about for a couple seconds. Then he opened his mouth to say something.
"Good night!" I loudly blurted out first.
Then I was in my bedroom so fast, you would have thought I'd spontaneously developed the power to teleport.
I slammed the door shut behind me, pressing my spine flat to it, eyes wide and taking shallow breaths through my nose. A few seconds passed where I just forced myself to inhale and exhale slowly a few times, trying to calm down. Then I winced, lightly banging the back of my head against the door.
Good job, Elsa. Way to make things mildly awkward. And for no real reason at all, you useless, hermitic dope!
With a small scowl, I shrugged out of the leather jacket and tossed it onto my bed. Then I unzipped my ankle boots, kicking them off and started pacing the length of my room back and forth, my hands twisting at my braid.
I couldn't just leave things like that. I had to talk to him. I had to toughen up and find an excuse to march my butt back out there. But what excuse?
My feet paused mid step as I glanced around my room for a minute before landing on one of my walls. Not just any wall. The one I shared with Riku's and Rayne's bedroom. Then I lightly tapped one fist into my palm. That's it! I quickly moved to my nightstand, opening the top drawer. Amongst its contents was a plastic baggie of earplugs. Digging out a pair and dropping the bag back into the drawer before closing it again, I then stepped over to my door. I took a second to take a deep breath and gather myself, standing up straighter and flicking my braid back behind me. Then with a firm, determined nod, I turned the knob and pulled, walking back out into the living room.
Lea was sitting on the couch that would be doubling for his bed tonight, arms splayed out wide to either side atop its backrest while he read the textbook that laid open in his lap. He'd pulled his hair out of its ponytail so his crimson locks were once again wild and free and he'd taken off his long-sleeved undershirt, now just wearing the tee.
Looking up at me, he all but leapt up to his feet. "El! Hi! I-" he grunted as the book he'd apparently forgotten was in his lap crashed down hard onto his foot.
I sucked in a tiny breath through my teeth with a frown, taking a step forward and reaching a hand out, "You okay?"
"Fine," he groaned. "I didn't need that toe anyway. It was only holding me back. Just dead weight." He laughed it off as he picked the textbook up off the floor, tossing it behind him onto the cushions before crossing his arms, "So, was there, ah⌠did you forget something?"
"Yes," I took a little step towards him, then frowned, glancing away. "Well, noâŚ" I started to take a step back before catching myself. Wrong way, dork. "That is to say, sort of⌠er, I just...hmâŚ" I thrust one fist forward, opening it palm facing up to reveal the earplugs, "Here!"
He stared down at them blankly. Then at me.
"Oh!" I gasped. "Right! Some sort of explanation would probably help." I gave a nervous heh. "So⌠uh⌠you know, those two," I gestured with my chin towards my roommates' bedroom door, "well, they just⌠the look they were giving each other before they went to bed, it's⌠well, it's a look I'm very familiar with from them. You know the look, the kind that should come with its own Marvin Gaye soundtrack. And those two⌠when they get going, they can really rattle the old headboard, if you know what I mean." A beat. Then I blanched. "Of course you know what I mean! Right, moving on. So uh⌠they are not quiet about it and they're definitely not quick. And these walls? They're thin. I'm talking like tissue paper thin. And not even the good Kleenex Deluxe kind of tissue, more like the cruddy, two-bit kind you'd get at the dollar store that just disintegrates if you even so much as breathe on it." Great, now I was just plain babbling. "These walls may as well not even be there for all the sound they block. Or rather, don't block. Then again, if they weren't there, then we'd not only hear but also see-" Wrap it up, girl, wrap it up. "A-Anyway! So just⌠just take these. You'll thank me later, believe me."
His eyes crinkled and he nodded, plucking them from my hand. "Alright, I'll take your word for it. Thanks."
Good. Okay. Yes, this was going well.
...huh. Though⌠slight hitch in the planâŚ
What now? I hadn't exactly thought this far ahead.
Maybe this was enough. I could now just make a graceful exit, leaving things in a better place than where I had previously. Yeah, that sounded good.
I gave him a tight-lipped grin, inching backwards as I pointed towards my room. "Okay then, I think I'll justâŚ" But as I turned, my eyes landed on Rayne's and Riku's door again and I froze and grimaced. "Ah, shoot," I hissed under my breath.
"Problem?" I heard Lea ask behind me.
I shook my head, "I meant to ask Rayne to unzip my dress before she went to bed since the zipper is just where I can't reach and-" I blinked, then glanced over my shoulder at him sheepishly before fully turning to face him. "And why am I even telling you this? Forget I said anything. It's nothing, I'll figure it out."
"I can do it," he tossed the ear plugs onto the coffee table between us before stepping around it.
Waving my hands rapidly back and forth in front of me, I said, "No, it's fine. Really, you don't have to-"
"Don't be silly, just let me help you," he came to stop in front of me.
I tucked in my lower lip. Maybe I was just being silly about this. I mean, what was the big deal? Really? "...o-okay," I sighed, turning my back to him once more and sweeping my braid forward over one shoulder, running my hands down its length a few times. At least my old nemesis, The Blush, had the common courtesy to wait until I was no longer looking at Lea before creeping its way up into my cheeks.
I could sense him taking another step closer to me, could hear his gentle breathing as I felt his fingers undo the clasp at the top of the zipper. One of his fingertips incidentally grazed my skin and I couldn't stop a tiny shiver. Then there was a pause. Like⌠a long pause. I frowned straight ahead, uncertain. Nothing seemed to be happening. I turned my head slightly, stopping just short of actually being able to look back at him. "...everything okay?"
"Uh⌠yeah, the uhâŚ" he cleared his throat, "...the stupid thing just got stuck for a sec there, but it's all good now." At last, the sound of the dress unzipping reached my ears. "There ya go, you're all set!"
My hand darted to clutch at the back of my dress, holding it together as I whipped around to face him. My blush? Only seemed to be growing in strength. I started backing away, "Th-thanks⌠for that. That was really⌠something. Nice! That was nice. Of you. To do that⌠for me. I-" I crashed into my door frame and stumbled. "Oops. Heh. Who put that there? Um⌠anywayâŚ"
And on that eloquent and fully formed note, I dashed into my room, banging the door closed. Then I puffed out a breath, slumping down to sit on the floor as I pinched the bridge of my nose.
Great. Just dandy. I hadn't left things mildly awkward this time. Oh no, I'd only left them mega, ultra, super awkward now. Progress! Superb. Just perfect.
That's it. It's decided. I'm not fit for human contact. I was just going to barricade myself in this room and never come out ever again. Ever. Period. The outside world would be better off without me anyhow. Good bye, people. Hello, sweet sweet solitude. I-
I heard a muffled buzz and my head snapped up. It'd come from Lea's jacket on my bed. I squinted at it for a second. Then it clicked. My phone! I half crawled, half scrabbled over to it, digging into the pocket and pulling it out, swiping the screen.
There was a new text from Lea.
2nite was fun
I blinked, looking over at my door. Then back down at my phone, pursing my lips to one side. My thumbs hovered over the keyboard for a second. Then slowly I began to type.
I thought so too.
I waited as those three little dots hopped in a row.
We shud totes do it again sometime
A huff of amusement escaped through my nose, the tension starting to leave my body.
I'd really like that.
Then I tipped my head to one side, grinning slightly as I tapped away further.
I'm paying next time though.
The dots were dancing on my screen again.
Aight, if u insist. But b warned, Im not a cheap date
Now I actually laughed.
I can live with that.
Perhaps I'd been a bit too hasty. Maybe there was no need to barricade myself in here. Not just yet anyway. I'd hold off for a bit.
At least long enough to see what tomorrow would bring.

Author's Note: Anyone else notice Lea's shirts seem to be getting tighter and tighter every new excuse he has to see Elsa out of his work clothes? I think he's subconsciously putting on a courtship display to present himself as a sexually viable mate xD Ahem, moving on⌠Fun Fact 1: Fuente Del Oro is a real, Coco-themed restaurant over in Disneyland Park in Paris! Google translate says the name means "Gold Fountain", oooOOooo pretty! I really hope Coco makes it into one of the future KH games eventually! Fun Fact 2: Elsa's dress this chapter is inspired by her purple dress from when she sings Into The Unknown in Frozen 2! Just picture it shorter and more cocktail-dressy. And I know in the movie, that purple dress is a nightgown, but shhh, we'll just forget that part. And the dress Lea described in his "how we met" story? Loosely based on Elsa's Show Yourself dress - again just picture it shorter, more practical and more sundressy xD Also if you haven't heard of it, Before Sunrise is a real movie, not to mention a real SAPPY movie. Kind of slow, but cute. I'd actually never heard of it until I started writing this chapter - saw a gif go by on tumblr of the lead couple from the movie doing something adorable that made me go "oh gosh, that's SO Lea and Elsa!" and had to watch it xD I'm kind of happy it came along when it did though, cuz it gave me inspiration for Lea's "how we met" story :)
Next chapter, what new challenges will Elsa face in her adventures in fake dating? Will she ever be able to work up the courage to initiate a display of affection herself? Just how much of a "not a cheap date" is Lea really? What about his shirts? CAN they get any tighter? Stay tuned!
Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you whoâve liked, reblogged, and followed so far, seeing those lil notifications always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!
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#kingdom hearts#frozen#elsa#axel#fanfiction#lea#fanfic#kingdom hearts fanfiction#frozen fanfiction#kh fanfiction#kh fanfic#frozen fanfic#kingdom hearts fanfic#axelsa#fluff#romcom#slow burn#kh3#my writing#ice cream and fire oven pizza#rare pair#crossover pairing#humor#snark
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And They Were Roommates - Vampire AU!
Pre-Roman/Patton, Suggested Janus/Remus
Warnings: Mild Vampire-typical violence
Vampire!Roman, Vampire!Remus, Vampire!Janus, Human!Patton (victims!Logan and Virgil...)
W/count: c/4500 (too long for tumblr but I couldnât resist)
Roman has two main problems in life. The first is that his adorable roommate is human and he is not. The second is that Remus is his brother. Both issues combine quite spectacularly when Remus invites himself over and Roman isn't there to stop him. He didn't know what he hoped for when he pictured Patton finding out he was a vampire but it wasn't this.Â
Roman had a problem. And yes, it might be one of those âregularâ problems that came with being a member of the undead but it was still a problem.
âRoman can you get some more milk when youâre out? I thought I got some the day before but thereâs none left.â
That wasnât the problem. Well, it was a problem; heâd realised last night that it had been a while since heâd âeatenâ some of the food bought in during the week and in his defence it had been a long time since heâd had to use milk with anything. He couldnât quite remember what was and was not an appropriate amount to get through in one sitting but that wasnât the problem.
The problem was that he was living with it. Him. He was living with him. He had a human roommate. An unbelievably adorable, funny, cheery, happy human roommate and Roman was in love with him.
Patton poked his head out of the kitchen when he didnât get a response, smiling in that unobtrusive yet quietly concerned way he did when he wanted to make sure Roman was alright and Roman wondered if still hearts could skip a beat. He noticed the little smile on his own face about a split-second after Patton did and while his cheeks couldnât heat themselves without a meal he felt them burn nonetheless. With a spin that was almost too fast to be human he turned away and busied himself with his sports bag, pretending to check his belongings before actually checking for his wallet and slinging it up on his shoulder.
âOf course! No friend of mine shall go without because of my own selfish actions.â He announced, loud to deflect attention from how awkward his own actions had been as he heard Patton step into the sitting room. He turned to face him with a more intentional smile and added, at a normal volume, âI wonât be long.â
Patton had gotten used to Romanâs late-night ventures out to town, âto the gymâ he had told him early on in their friendship, and yet every night before he left, he stopped him in the doorway for a hug.
âBe careful, ok?â He insisted as he always did, the most testing part of Romanâs day and the most dangerous part of Pattonâs as he stepped into Romanâs space and looped his arms around his midriff. Roman pressed his cheek to Pattonâs shoulder, facing away from his neck as his scent sunk deep into his lungs. It begged him to turn his head, to press his face to his skin, to breathe in deep, to kiss, to bite.
âOf course I will.â Roman answered, pulling away from the hug and gripping tight to his bag straps with an easy, close-mouthed smile, lips straining against his fangs. âIâll be home soon.â He repeated and stood smiling in the doorway. A beat passed. And another, until Pattonâs eyes naturally flicked to the hall and Roman remembered that yes. Leaving actually involved leaving. He cleared his throat with a wave and was gone, Pattonâs quiet laugh behind him reigniting his ongoing debate if he could have a soul so full of love for one person and be the biggest risk to them at the same time. It was something he tried not to think about as he hunted through the streets for a meal, for a victim since Remus had gone quiet on him.
His brother was a complicated man and as such they had a complicated relationship. Just about the only thing he could be counted on for, until now of course, was a supply. He had âfriends.â He had Janus. He had ways of getting blood that didnât result in death which they both knew he only did so Roman would keep talking to him. Remus had a steady yet undoubtably illegal supply of blood to support them both; and Janus (Roman didnât need or want to know what his brotherâs relationship was with the human) seemed willing enough to step in as a donor when the need arose. Yesterday however Remus hadnât answered his phone. He also hadnât answered any of Romanâs texts or subsequent calls despite having clearly seen them, and so he was forced to hunt.
It didnât take long to find someone who met his requirements. Young enough, healthy, not too strong, alone: all things that gave them a better chance of recovering. Years of disuse had left his ability to compel his victims shaky at best but heâd found that the faster he could subdue them, the fewer memories he needed to alter. He ignored his phone vibrating in his pocket as he drank from a student heâd caught on his way home from the library, his bookbag heavy enough to help Roman overbalance him and force him to sleep. It buzzed again as he was propping the boy up against the wall, hidden from the main street. Grumbling about impatient texters, Roman carefully set the boyâs glasses right on his face and gently woke him up.
It was easier when they were dazed, he acknowledged, guilt pulling horribly at his heart as he instructed the boy to get up, to continue home and forget this ever happening. As he watched the boy leave he pulled out his phone, keeping half an eye on him to make sure he was steady on his feet as he checked his messages.
Remus: whr r u I hv th stff
It was sent alongside a series of squirting and heart emojis and Roman was filled with the same regret for texting first that he always had when he got a reply from his brother. He knew Remus made his texts as unreadable as possible on purpose, heâd seen him fighting with autocorrect more than once when it tried to fix them. Over the years, however, heâd gotten not only used to them but good at reading them so it only took a moment for the second text to drain the blood from his newly flushed cheeks.
Remus: nvrmnd il mt u at ur plc
Iâll meet you at your place. Roman was texting back so fast the display on his screen was warping.
Roman: Donât Iâm not home!
Roman: Seriously donât Iâm out
Roman: Remus!
Roman: Iâm not home donât go there
âShit!â He swore, throwing his phone into his back and tearing home, praying that Remus was bluffing, that he was just ignoring him to be a pain, that he would get there before his brother did.
He didnât.
Patton opened the door to what might have been the silliest knock he had ever heard. He maybe shouldnât have; it was pretty late at night and he wasnât expecting anyone but someone from the street couldnât get in unless they knew the code for the main door so he figured it was likely a neighbour in need or a lost guest. What he wasnât expecting was a doppelganger of his roommate grinning in his face.
âO-oh!â The exclamation was about all he could manage as he took in the person in front of him. The cartoonish moustache would have been cute if it wasnât poised above a too-sharp grin, and the familiarity of Romanâs eyes set into the foreign face made their proximity a little unsettling. It had to be Romanâs brother, there was no other explanation for the similarities, but that knowledge didnât really make him feel better. Roman barely ever spoke about him, Patton wasnât even too sure of his name, but what he did say was rarely complimentary.
Still, he put on a Patton-ted smile and did his best to look welcoming. He was greeting a guest after all, though Remus beat him to the introductions.
âHi! You must be the roommate Roman wonât let me meet.â Remus announced, his grin looking a little more charming now that his face was moving.
âAnd I take it you must be the brother.â Patton replied with a slightly easier smile, holding his hand out to shake. âIâm Patton.â
âRemus.â
If Patton noticed the flirty purr he didnât mention it, just like he didnât mention the fact that Remus had the same icy cold hands that Roman was so self-conscious about. He just took a step back from the door, determined as ever to take as much care of the person in front of him in the limited time they had. Step number one was warming this boy up!
âRoman isnât here right now, did you want to come in and wait? He probably wonât be too long but I can text him if you like?â He offered and Remus took him up on it immediately, throwing his body into the flat with a kind of reckless abandon as he started nosying around looking for the secrets of this hidden part of his brotherâs life. The only thing he seemed to be careful with was the bag he was carrying, the same kind that Roman had left with, which he was taking care not to swing as he scurried around.
âOh, I already texted him,â Remus informed, smirking to himself as he ceased his search and turned his attention back to Patton. âHe should be here really soon.â
âWell that's good.â Patton smiled back, a little uneasy again now that Remus was inside and being so ominous but he gestured him towards the couch anyway and waited as he took a seat and set his bag to the side. After a momentâs hesitation he joined him, his face flushing uncomfortably as his guest watched him every step of the way. Remus must have been able to tell he was beginning to feel awkward because he leaned away as he settled down and Patton used that space to take a steadying breath before smiling again, determined to hold his own and make his guest feel at home.
Remus was honestly impressed with the little blood-bag. He was cute, there was no denying that, and clearly had balls if he was this happy to sit beside a vampire he technically didn't know who was clearly ready for his next meal. It was a constant source of amusement for him how often Roman needed to feed, a running joke that his brother didnât appreciate, but if Patton always sat this close, was so quick to blush all the time, and smelled this good then it was no wonder. It wouldnât really be fair to use Patton all the time so filling up on Remusâs supplies was starting to make sense, but he was really taking this âconsideration of othersâ thing a bit far if he was getting through so much as well as his roommate. Either that or he really couldnât resist the boy and that was something Remus was very curious to learn more about.
âIâm getting an idea of why Romanâs been keeping you all secreted away.â He told him with a wink, breathing in deep as Patton blushed beside him. âYou really are something special.â He added and sighed out happily, enjoying the sound and smell of excited, rushing blood in such close proximity.
âI donât know about that.â Patton deflected. He couldn't remember the last time a stranger made him blush this much. Remusâs compliments were strange, sure, but there was something about them coming from such a familiar face that was really flustering him. It wasn't Roman saying it, though. Worse than that, he was Romanâs brother, and he was eager to move the conversation along. âUm, do you want something to eat while you wait?â
Remusâs surprise was clear in his expression and his eyes flicked down to Pattonâs neck before checking his face again. There was nothing there to suggest he wasn't being genuine, and his heartbeat was steady (considering how flustered he had been a moment ago) so he likely wasn't lying. Roman would be so pissed. âI will if youâre offering.â He answered anyway, and that seemed to be the right thing to say because Patton lit up, happy to be useful.
âOf course! Youâre Romanâs brother.â Patton insisted, angling towards him as he thought of what he had in the fridge that he could heat quickly. He must be starving! And being so surprised to be fed just wouldnât do. âWhat would you-â His words died in his throat as Remus moved in, his mouth latching on to his neck and he found himself being pinned to the couch, lying on his back as Remus settled over him and bit down. He lay still for a moment, shock locking his body in place until he felt the first pull of blood leaving his neck. Eyes wide, his hands shot up and struck Remus's body but he didnât move. He clung to his shirt when pushing yielded no results and as Remus hummed soothingly against his neck he thought he could hear Roman calling his name.
Remus's attack was surprising short lived and Patton soon felt his teeth leave his neck and a tongue swipe over the wound, followed by a quick peck. âThere! All cleaned up.â
He could hear Roman again, shouting in the hall, and sure enough his roommate burst through the door just as Remus turned his head to face it, making no move to get off of him as Patton followed his line of sight to the doorway. Face pale, he gave a little wave, spooked and confused as Roman marched towards them.
âYou godless fiend!â Roman screamed, pulling Remus off of him with more strength than Patton, as dazed as he was, thought he could gain from his trips to the gym. The only reason Remus wasn't sent flying to the ground was from his own matched ability to take that much pressure on one leg as he landed easily near the door.
âYour roommate is a wonderful host, bro-ski.â Remus crooned as if he hadn't just been thrown across the room; as if Roman wasnât now stalking towards him. âHe offered and I couldn't refuse, he's very tempting. I see why you've been keeping him to yourse-â He choked before he could finish, Roman had grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and dragged him to the hall and up to the roof before he could say another word.
There were tears in Roman's eye when he finally unhanded his brother. Remus wanted to laugh, he wanted to find the humour in the situation and rub Romanâs face in it but he was confused.
âWhy are you being such a baby about this? He offered! And youâve drank from Janus before so you can hardly get all territorial about this one.â He huffed, making no move to straighten out his clothes or hair as Roman stalked around the roof.
âHe doesnât know, Remus!â Roman wailed, pulling at his hair as he spun away, staring at the door back into the building as if Patton would appear there, kitted out with a cross and stake to tell him never to come back. Remus was quiet behind him for a moment before opening his mouth with a pop.
âI think he might have an idea now.â He quipped and Roman wanted to throw him off the roof. âSpeaking of Janus-â
âI donât want to hear about Janus!â Roman yelled back, turning on his brother who looked too unfazed for someone who had been dragged by the neck up three flights of stairs, for someone who had attacked his roommate, for someone who had so completely destroyed his life. âYouâve ruined everything! How can he trust me now? How can he possibly like me after this?â
Remus gave a careless shrug in response and Roman had him by the shirt once again, angling him dangerously over the edge of the roof and Remus continued to speak like this happened every day. It was Remus, it was entirely possible that was true. That or he didnât think Roman had it in him.
âIâd imagine just the same as he always did. You did rush in to âsave himâ just now.â He answered, lifting his arms to do the bunny-ears before dropping them back down to his sides, letting them dangle and swing behind him as he relaxed into the angle he was being held at. âNothingâs really changed, just his world-view.â
âJust his world-view?â Roman seethed, fists tightening in Remusâs shirt before he turned and threw him back onto the roof, watching as he bounced along to an ungraceful halt.
âYeah! I mean, what else has changed?â Remus asked, looking defensive for the first time since the confrontation started but not angry. âYouâre still you, heâs still him, he didnât really know me so heâs really only learned who I am. And now heâs got a fun new fact about you too!â
âThat Iâm awful.â Roman despaired though his anger swiftly reappeared when Remus just kissed his fingers and blew it in his direction.
âExactly! And I think youâll be fine, just as long as he knows that youâre no more awful than you were yesterday. Just remember, if youâve really blown it, he probably wouldâve died soon anyway!â Remus didnât wait around to witness the full performance that was Romanâs outrage and skipped instead over to the roofâs edge. âWell! This has been fun, or it was before you showed up. Keep the blood, Iâm going home. Donât bother coming to tell me when this is all inevitably fine and youâve freaked out for nothing. Tell me if it goes horribly wrong. Iâll let my sources know thereâs a new donor on the market.â Remus jumped off the roof before his brother could react or retaliate.
And then Roman was alone. Standing on the roof at nearly midnight while PattonâŚ
Patton!
He turned and threw himself down the stairs, taking them far too many at a time to be human until he was standing once again in the doorway to his flat, staring at Patton on the couch. His roommate had managed to sit himself up and was cradling his hand against his neck, fingers gently searching for proof of what had just happened over his unblemished neck.
He looked up when Roman appeared at the door and his heart clenched in fear before he realised who he was looking at. Patton sunk back into the couch, feeling a little too weak to stay tense, and gave an awkward smile.
âHi Roman.â He greeted, just like this was any other day but he had to clear his throat when his voice came out a bit too scratchy to be normal. He looked tired and confused, dazed, but he was still smiling at him as though he wasnât the worst person in the world. âYour brotherâs certainly⌠interesting.â
Roman felt his heart break. He hurried over but stopped short of truly reaching him, hovering by the end of the couch before dropping to his knees. He didnât want him to be scared, he didnât want any of this to have happened, and yet here they were.
âPatton, Iâm so sorry.â The apology felt like bile in his mouth, choking back everything he wanted to say and not knowing any words that could express it. He didnât expect Patton to accept it, but more than that, he didnât expect Patton to brush it off, shaking his head as he reached a hand over to comfort him. Roman could add it to the list of things he hated about himself in that moment as he took it, giving in to the selfish urge and clinging on as tight as he dared.
âNo, it's my fault. I should'veâŚâ Patton tried to excuse but that was enough for Roman to find his voice. He never was speechless for long.
âWhat should you have done? Known? Known that vampires exist? That I would let him find you?â He despaired, the angry tears welling up in his eyes setting Patton off too until they were both crying. âI hid this from you and you got hurt. Itâs all my fault.â
âI'm not hurt.â It was an empty comfort, not helped at all by the tears, and Roman shook his head in disbelief.
âRemus drank from you!â
âIt was ok.â He flushed at Romanâs incredulous stare and elaborated. âI mean, it wasnât my favourite thing but it only stung a little. He was nice about it, I think?â
They both squirmed for a moment under Pattonâs embarrassment, and Roman took his hand back to both put some distance between them and to wipe his face free of tears. Patton soon copied the action, rubbing self-consciously at his neck again as the quiet of the room swirled around them. There was rarely so little noise in the flat for the natural sounds of a building to make themselves known. In the absence of chatter, singing, music and movement the sitting room was like a strangerâs. Trying to ignore the awkward energy that buzzed low and sporadic between them was like trying not to look at a spider on the wall while never letting it leave your sight, allowing it to become bigger and bigger in your mind until you couldnât help but be so very aware of it.
âThere's nothing about him that's nice.â Roman eventually said, his uncharacteristically quiet voice interrupting the atmosphere if not quite managing to clear it.
Patton didnât reach for his hand again, something that Roman tried really hard to feel grateful for and did his best not to start crying again. Heâd been caught in too many tear loops with Patton over the years and he didnât deserve to start one now.
The quiet, at least, gave Patton a moment to actually reflect on what had just happened. Romanâs brother had bitten him. He had come to his home and bitten him because he was a vampire. A vampire. Because they were real now. And Romanâs brother was one.
âSoâŚâ He tentatively broached, looking down at Roman who was still kneeling beside him on the floor. âIs it just him whoâs⌠yâknow?â
âNo... I am too.â Roman confessed, dropping his gaze down to the ground as he felt the pain of that secret finally being aired dig deep into his torso instead of lifting off of his shoulders like it should.
âIs this why you won't eat my cookies?â A confused, strangled laugh hit the back of Romanâs throat like he was choking on his own tongue.
âThat's what you're worried about?â He spluttered and a quick look up at Patton showed he had reacted just the way Patton had wanted. His eyes searched that reassuring grin for any trace of malice or discomfort and found none. This boy was something else.
âI mean, I was starting to get offended.â Patton joked, unable to sit any longer with his friend looking so sad. Fixing that was easier to focus on but even he couldnât ignore an issue this big.
âYeah, it's why I wouldn't eat, well, anything you gave me.â Roman clarified, needing to give the information over regardless of how small a question it had been. Patton deserved this and any other answers he needed; heâd kept them from him for too long.
Patton was glad that Roman had answered him properly. It gave him some confidence to jump from the higher springboard.
âWhy didn't you tell me?â And that really was the big question, wasnât it, even if he could guess at the answer. He didnât want to feel so hurt for not being trusted but it was a pretty big secret to keep hidden from him. Then again, it was a pretty big secret to need to hide.
âI didn't know how.â Roman admitted, shame in his eyes as he hoped Patton would understand. âI was scared you would be scared, that you would want me to leave. I know I shouldnât have kept that decision from you and Iâm so sorry I did.â Again, Patton was quiet, giving the answer the time it deserved to digest despite knowing his answer.
âWell I'm not scared. And I donât want you to leave.â He told him, knowing that it didnât settle everything but wanting to put them on the right track. Still, he couldnât help but stumble over his next question. âHow long have you been a- vampire?â
âA while.â It was an awkward confession to make; he wasnât entirely sure and he didnât know if ânot that long for a vampireâ would fly when he wasnât really even sure if heâd been forgiven. Patton just nodded knowingly.
âGotcha. I've seen Twilight.â
Roman was spluttering again and really, it was starting to become unbecoming.
âI am not like Twilight!â He defended, calmed only by how genuine Pattonâs laugh was when he inevitably burst into giggles.
âI don't know you've got the pretty and brooding thing down.â
âI do not!â And what was he meant to do in response to that but blush? Curse his timing because of course he couldnât have made a comment like that before he ate. As much as he appreciated Pattonâs attempts to lighten the mood, however, he had to be sure of where they stood. âAre you sure that doesn't hurt?â
âI'll be fine, I'm more surprised than anything. It wasnât quite what I expected when I offered to feed him.â Patton admitted with a sheepish smile.
âI'm sorry.â Roman apologised again and Patton took his hand with a reassuring squeeze.
âI forgive you. Just⌠maybe let me know next time your brother is visiting.â
âCan I hug you? Is that ok right now?â Just as always the answer to that was a resounding âyesâ and Patton had pulled Roman up into his arms before he could get another word in. Roman smiled into his shoulder, tears once again wetting his eyes as he mumbled into Pattonâs shirt. âRemus is never coming over here again.â
âHe might need to to get his bag.â
ââŚIâd not look in there if I were you.â
---
Across town, Remus arrived home with all the grace of a deflated and oddly damp balloon, kicking up into the air to land on the couch, flat on his back, with his head nestled uncomfortably in Janusâs lap.
âI bit Romanâs roommate today.â He announced without preamble, doing little to help as Janus repositioned himself underneath him so that Remus wasnât digging into his legs. It left Remusâs neck bent pretty out of place but he didnât bother correcting it further. It gave him a nice angle to look up from and that was good by him.
âOh? The one who didnât know he was a vampire?â Janus enquired, similarly uncaring as he scrolled through his phone with one hand as the other dropped down to play with Remusâs hair.
âYeah. Howâd you know that?â
âBecause Iâve met your brother and your brotherâs an idiot.â
Remus tsk-ed in annoyance like heâd gotten an easy question wrong on a pub quiz. âI never think of that.â
âItâs admirable to think so highly of him,â Janus drawled in response, finally looking down from his phone to smirk at the man in his lap, âbut thereâs a good reason you keep me around.â
He moved to pet his hair again but Remus caught his hand before he could reach and pulled it down enough for him to inspect his wrist. The bite mark there was deep but healing well, he noted, pressing a kiss to the skin he knew would do nothing to speed it up. The turning bite could only heal on itâs own; whatever it was that ran through Remus and allowed him to heal was just starting to build up in Janusâs own body. The wound would heal when it was ready.
âDid you tell him?â Janus asked, letting his arm be manipulated long enough for Remus to swipe an impatient tongue over the mark before wriggling himself free to wipe the spit in Remusâs hair, his petting forgotten as he checked his phone again.
âNah, he was too busy yelling at me. Heâll figure it out when he needs his next meal.â He frowned up at Janus as he made to get up, the new strength of the newly turned vampire making it difficult drag out cuddle sessions.
âSpeaking of meals.â Janus purred just as their doorbell rang and Remus perked up, petulance forgotten as he watched him move to answer it. âI ordered takeaway.â
The surly kid on the other side of the door did nothing to lessen Remusâs excitement as he grinned, watching from the couch.
Roman really didnât need to know about this.
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Itâs Not a Date (Or Is It?)
âWhy would I, of all people, ask the poor girl out on her birthday, of all days,â he said. âThat sounds like the worst birthday gift ever.â
rating: T genre: romance, humour pairing: rinlen words:Â 5,141
Although they had been friends since they were in diapers, when it came to Rinâs birthday, Len always had no clue what to give her.
You see, the girl was difficult. She didnât really like her birthdayâshe refused to celebrate it, even. She went so far as to threaten to blackmail him (with childhood photos of him half-naked, suction cups on his nipples; it was better not to ask, for childhood had been a strange time) if he so much as ever planned a surprise party behind her back.Â
Whenever heâd try asking about what sheâd want for her birthday, sheâd scoff and roll her eyes and tell him something stupid like, âA will to live.â Yes, Rin, we all want a will to live, heâd think. But alas I need something a little more obtainable.
And, well, it wasnât like Len could just not give her a giftâhe had to. It was obligatory. While Rinâs blood curdled at the mention of her own birthday, whenever it came to anyone elseâs, she would go ham. The previous birthday, sheâd knitted Len a sweater. A whole, mcfucking sweater. And you can bet this simp wore it so much the armpits started permanently smelling like the inside of a menâs locker room.Â
So he had to give her something back as equally as awesome. It was just an unwritten rule in his book of life. It was Len law.
Despite spending a good portion of the year listening out for any things she could want, this year around was particularly tough. Rin had mentioned, in the off-occasion, wanting several things; a television (he couldnât afford that even if he wanted to), a boyfriend (well⌠maybe? Ahem. Just kidding), and a trip to the ISS (h⌠how).
For obvious reasons, such gifts were unobtainable. Which came to the dilemma he experienced almost every year: what in the ever loving fuck should he give to Rin this year?
It hit one week before her birthday when he started to grow desperate. So desperate, in fact, he consulted two of Rinâs closest female friendsâGumi and Miku, who seemed to be (sometimes, mostly) on the same wavelength as her.Â
He didnât like talking to them. They were painful to engage with. Insufferable. The human embodiment of gremlins. But desperate times called for desperate measures.
âA gift for Rin, huh,â Miku had echoed, when heâd planted himself at their desks one morning. Rin always came late, so, it wasnât like heâd be caught in the act or anything anyway.Â
Len nodded.
Gumi and Miku exchanged looks.
âHow about you ask her out,â Miku suggested, a deadpan expression. Gumi, however, couldnât do much to hide her amusement; bursting into a fit of giggles behind her hand.
He rolled his eyes. âA serious gift, Miku.â
âWhat?â She looked innocent. âIt is serious.â
Gumi continued to snort-laugh off to the side.
âWell, what are you two giving her for her birthday?â he asked, deciding it wasnât worth the effort arguing.
Miku tossed a pigtail behind one shoulder. âWeâre going to have a sleepover, where we will forcibly sing happy birthday to her and make her eat a cake.â
Len frowned. âThat sounds⌠nice. I guess.â
âYou canât steal our idea.â She jabbed a finger at his chest. âLike I said, just ask her out.â
âWhy would I, of all people, ask the poor girl out on her birthday, of all days,â he said. âThat sounds like the worst birthday gift ever.â
It was their turn to roll their eyes. âMaybe to you, banana brain,â Gumi said. âItâs pathetic that youâve been friends with her the longest out of us three, and you still donât know what gift to give her on her birthday. Talk about dumbass energy.â Then they high-fived each other.
Len bristled, his pride taking a hefty blow. âAnd? At least Iâm trying to give her something she wants,â he reasoned, voice squeaking.
âIf you used any of that big, big brain in that big, big head of yours, you would know what she wants,â Miku shot back, waggling a finger at his forehead. âLike I said: kissy kissy. Go on a date with me. Letâs get married or something and live happily ever after.â
But he was unconvinced. Rin? Living happily ever after? That girl couldnât sit through any romance movie for the life of her.Â
He decided this conversation was not worth having. He would figure this out on his own.
Maybe. Hopefully. Probably.
.
âA gift for your girlfriend,â Kaito mused aloud, looking distant as he hung over the fence separating him and Len. Kaito was his neighbour; an older, more experienced neighbour (he was a university student and proudly boasted about his experience having dated two girls and one guy).
It was T-minus three days until Rinâs birthday, and Len was still running in circles trying to figure out what to give her. It had come to asking his neighbour. Who, in all the times theyâd interacted, always smelt like bong water and cigarettes.
Len winced. âSheâs not my girlfriend,â he saidâor, well, insisted.
Kaito ignored him. âHow about a date,â he suggested. âLike, a really sweet date. You take her somewhere she likes to go and treat her. It doesnât have to be grand or extravagant, or anything.â
Huh. Huh. The guy had a point. Not the date part, but the taking-her-out-and-paying-for-her part. It didnât seem too bad of an idea, actually.
All of a sudden, Len had a great idea for what to do on Rinâs birthday. He quickly thanked Kaito for his advice and ran off, annoyed he hadnât thought of it in the first place, but nevertheless plotting a master plan of where he could take her on her birthday.
First, of course, he had to check whether she was available that day.
Rin r u busy on Sunday, he texted her on LINE.
She replied two minutes later with, Iâm at Mikuâs in the morning, but Iâm free in the afternoon. Why?
Okay, good. He didnât need to rethink schedules or anything. Do u want to hang out? We could go 2 karaoke or smth.
Sure. What time?
Len paused to think, before responding, How abt one?
Rinâs reply came back almost immediately. Sounds good.
He was relieved. Okay. So. Now he just had to figure out what to do to make the whole thing, well, special. It was her birthday. Sure, going to karaoke was good and fun and all, but they already did that pretty regularly. It was part of the plan, but he needed something more.Â
How about a nice restaurant? Or was that too, well, suggestive? Besides, he only had so much of his allowance he could spare. Hmm.
He pulled up the internet browser on his phone and began typing into the search function, Places to go on datâ Waitâdelete delete delete. Places to go for birthdays. There we go.
Some articles popped up. He clicked on the first one, scanned the list. Restaurant. Cinema. Musical theatre. Park. Museum. Observation tower.
Observation tower?
Len thought for a moment. He knew he was too broke to take her somewhere exciting like, uh, Skytree or whatever. But then there was the Metropolitan Government Building in Shinjuku. And that was free. And they had a cafe at the top.Â
Plus, it was sort of romanticâÂ
But the point of it was, it was for her birthday. Not a date. And it was something nice and unique, and he could totally imagine them sitting in the cafe watching the sunset over Tokyo's skyline.
So, that was decided. Karaoke. Observation tower. Maybe dinner if Rin was keen on getting something like Gusto because he didn't have the bank account for it. Man, Kaito was sort of a genius, in his own strange, Kaito way.
He reminded himself to buy the guy an ice cream sometime as a thank you gift.
.
Sunday finally came, and Len arranged to meet Rin out front of their usual go-to karaoke box. She was already there waiting when he arrivedâwhich was strange, given the girl's notoriety for being fashionably late in most situationsâlooking bored and scrolling through her phone. She was dressed sort of cute; a mustard yellow overall dress and white collar shirt underneath, hair tied back by her signature white bow.Â
He swept her up into an embrace, which she wriggled out of with a groan. "Happy birthday!"
Her cheeks flushed red and she rolled her eyes. "Shut up."
Len took no offence, steering her into the lobby of Joysound. "How was your sleepover with Gumi and Miku?" he asked.
Rin looked surprised. "You knew about that?"
"Oh. Yeah. I talked to them last week about it."
She blinked. "Huh." She seemed to brush it off as something minor, answering his question with a shrug of her shoulders. "You know. It's Miku and Gumi. We played monopoly before Miku got bored, and then they forced me to play truth or dare."
"Truth or dare, huh." Len had heard multiple horror stories about her previous experiences with the girls playing truth or dare. He grinned, glancing over at her. âSo what did you do?â
âDare, of course,â Rin said. She held up her wrist, showing an elaborate illustration of an erected penis. âWhat do you think?â
His eyebrows shot up. âThatâs creative.â
She snickered. "Yeah. I think they were getting a bit frustrated with me. I kept saying pass on their dares, so the punishment was to drink a whole bottle of ketchup."
Len wondered what possible thing they were trying to get her to do that she would willingly drink ketchup over doing. "Did you?"
"Yeah. And then I threw up all over Miku's carpet, so they called it a night."
The way she said it so nonchalantly caught him off guard as they stepped up to the counter. He fumbled with his wallet, pulling out a membership card and scrambling to fill out the slip of paper the front counter clerk handed to him.
Rin was reading his writing over his shoulder. âFour hours? Really? I thought we would be going for like, eight hours.â
He handed the paper back to the staff and shot her his best, reassuring grin. "I've got other stuff planned after this, you know."
She quirked an eyebrow. "Other stuff?" she echoed. "Better not be a surprise party, or I will post those pictures of you all overâ"
"It's not a surprise party. It's just you and I. Jeez."
The staff told him how much they owed, and he dished out the money before Rin could even get to her own purse.Â
She frowned. "Hey. Tell me how much it was when we get to the room so I can pay you back."
"No," he said smoothly, pocketing the change and taking the receipt. "Today, it's on me."
Rin opened her mouth to argue as they started off down the corridor towards their allocated room number. "Are you sure? Four hours isn't cheapâ"
"It's fine," he insisted. "It's your birthday. Think of it as part of the gift."
She wasn't impressed, but she knew better not to argue.
The room they were given wasn't hugeâwhich was fine, not that they needed the spaceâso they sat next to each other bumping shoulders on the far side of the room, facing the television. Rin already had the remote in hand within moments of sitting down, queuing a ton of songs they usually defaulted to singing every time they went to karaoke.
When they cleared out what she had queued, she reached for the menu on the table in front of them and started looking through it. âIâm hungry. Can we get something?â
Len was trying to remember how much he had left in his wallet in terms of cash. "Uh. Sure."
She pointed at a picture of a plate of takoyaki. "Want to share some?"
They were only 600 yen. Not too bad.Â
He nodded, before noticing a lack of drinks on their table, and the dry, scratchy feeling in his throat. He quickly checked the receipt they were given. "Shoot. I got us the drink bar. Want me to grab you something?"
"Oh." Rin thought for a moment, as if the decision was really tough, although the selection at the drink bar almost never changed. "Just get me some minute maid. The usual."
Right. Orange soda. The usual. As he got up from his seat, she reached over to unhook the phone from the wall.
"I'll order the food," she told him before he left.
Len poured himself a glass of calpis, grabbed Rin's soda. While waiting for the drink machine to finish, he acknowledged that he was feeling sort of nervous. His heart was beating hard against his ribcage, palms clammy. Why though? It wasn't like this was any different from any other karaoke venture him and Rin went on.
Well, besides the plans he had for the evening, but it was because of her birthday. Nothing else. No sinister thoughts here.
When he got back to the room, Rin had already queued another block of songs and was in the middle of singing something. He hadnât even the chance to queue anything he wanted.Â
God, she was such a remote hog, and he thought to tell her off, but reminded himself it was her birthday. Let her be the evil remote hog that she was for the day.
The food came when they were in the middle of a duet. Len almost missed his part of the song, because she hadnât just ordered takoyaki, but also a plate of fries and a strawberry parfait. His eyes popped out of his head as the employee set down the food on the table.
Rin, he thought. Why are you like this. I love you, but why are you like this.
âAre you going to eat all of that?â he asked when the song finished.
She gave him a look. âNo? Weâre sharing.â
Len mumbled something along the lines of okay yeah whatever but I didnât ask for this much food. He reached for a soggy fry, mourning his allowance.
.
Karaoke went by fast. In retrospect, it was probably better to have only spent four hours there, because his throat was raw by the third hour. Rinâthe absolute madmanâwas still going somewhat strong, although her voice was a tad raspy by the end.
After Len paid for the food, they left and headed for the station nearby. On the way there, Rin asked, "So, where to next?"
"Shinjuku." He left it brief.
She screwed up her face. "Shinjuku? Ew. Why are we going there?"
"Because that's where I planned for us to go?" He gave her a hurt look, and she returned it, playful.
Admittedly, Len was a little worried, considering Rin had consumed almost all of the food they were supposed to share (not to forget that she also put another dint in his wallet). He was planning on them having cake or something at the cafe at the top of the north tower, because it was her birthday, but she probably wouldn't even be hungry.
The trains were starting to get a little busyâSunday afternoon, everyone was going homeâso they had to stand a little close together. Rin parked herself in the corner between the seats and the door, and Len right beside her, trying to avoid touching the other people around them but leaving enough space for Jesus between each other.
Normally Len wouldn't find himself so worked up over this situation, but today, his brain was like, stupid teenage boy mode or something because being so close to her was really bothering him. She seemed unaware of that, though, recounting some of the misadventures she'd had with Miku and Gumi the night before.
He listened, but didn't really listen, hyper aware of their hands and arms grazing with every jolt of the train, and eyes betraying him every few minutes by slipping down to her lips. Why, oh why, was he sexualising his best friend like this? On her birthday? Really, Len?
Eventually, they reached their destination station, and headed towards the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building.
Rin tried nagging him again about where they were going.
"You'll see in, like, five minutes," he told her.
She sulked. âWhy is it some big secret?â she complained. âI hate secrets.â
âItâs not a secret. I just like seeing you suffer.â
âLen. Choke.â
He grinned as they turned a corner in the underground walkway leading them away from the station, reaching a set of long, long escalators. Rin peered up at the sign above, trying to catch a glimpse of what possible location they were heading to.
"Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building?" she read. "What's so special about that?"
Len feigned nonchalance, tossing a shoulder. "Oh, you know," he said. "There are observation decks at the top of each tower, and I heard it looks really nice at sunset, so I was just thinking of going there with you."
"Huh." Her expression went blank. "That's nice."
It was a short walk amongst the towering buildings of Shinjuku. This part of the city wasn't as busy or touristy; clean and pristine with wide, empty footpaths. A clear, blue sky peeked through the skyscrapers overhead. It was only five or so, so they still had a bit of time before sundown. Luckily, the weather and visibility were good that day, much to his relief.
The wait in line to reach the observation level was long, but admittedly, worth it. Rin seemed happy once they reached the top, running over to the closest window and pulling out her phone to snap pictures of the skyline. She ushered him over, made him squint into the distance to look for the ocean, and they spent a good half hour trying to spot landmarks amongst the sea of buildings below.
After walking the perimeter of the building, they settled down in the seats of the cafe. âDo you want anything?â Len asked.
Rin hummed, eyes skimming over the menu. âI think Iâll just get tea.â
He was a little disappointed she wasnât interested in any of the sweets on display (the banana cake looked really good, okay), but decided in retrospect, he wouldâve been terrified if that girl could fit anymore in after eating takoyaki, fries and almost all of the strawberry parfait.
After he came back with their drinks, they settled into a comfortable silence. Rin was responding to messages on her phone, and he was just happy to watch as her expression shifted with every thought.
Eventually, she set down her phone and stared down at the table between them. âSo,â she began, in a tone that meant business.
He sat up in his chair, smiled at her, but it was nervous, because sheâall of a suddenâseemed very serious. And serious Rin was not a common occurrence.
Her fingers curled into fists on her thighs, and her gaze flitted everywhere in the room but his face. âIs this, um, a date?â
At first, Len didnât know how to respond.Â
His mouth hung open, before he became aware of his expression, snapping it shut. Then he cleared his throat. âUm.â To be honest, he didnât know. Was it a date? Well, maybe he lowkey wanted it to be but did Rin want it to be? By the looks of it, she didnât seem very⌠impressed by the idea. âItâs, uh⌠whatever you want it to be, Rin.â
She blinked, eyes falling on him, then dropping back down to her knees. âOh.â
Was that the right answer? Had he just made her uncomfortable? Had he just ruined her entire birthday?
He was too afraid to ask.
They sat in awkward silence, until the sky outside started to turn various shades of orange, and people began swarming the windows to watch the sunset.
Rin was kind of peering over, as if torn between getting up from the chair or staying seated.
âYou want to go look?â Len asked, giving her a smile to try and ease the uncomfortable air between them.
She hesitated, the corners of her lips twitching. âI wonât even be able to see over everyone.â
He, with the intelligence of a mitochondria, said, âWell, I can just hold you up.â
Rin snorted. âAre you sure you can do that?â
He blew a raspberry, faking confidence. âUh, yeah, sure I can.â
âOkay then, Mr Buff Arms. Prove it to me.â
She got up from her seat with a shit-eating grin, and he scrambled after her, crossing the floor in direction of one of the busiest windows. The reason why the crowds were gathering at that particular spot was not just because of the sunset, but because of the fact that you could see a beautifully clear silhouette of Mt Fuji in the distance.
He hadnât even realised that; it was hiding behind the clouds before.
Len gestured for her to climb onto his back.
âAre you sure?â Rin looked uncertain, eyeing him like a venomous snake. âIâm like, almost the same weight as you, Len.â
âSo?â he bluffed.
She stood there staring, before giving in with the roll of her eyes. âDonât cry if I break something.â
Then she wrapped her arms around his neck, hiking one leg up his side, and he hooked his arms under her thighs to hoist her up. She was right. She was heavy. But he was willing to be crushed under the weight of her for her to have a nice birthday.
âHold on to me,â she ordered, arms unlatching from his neck. âI want to take some pictures.â
Len gave a grunt as a reply. It was the best he could do.
After a while (probably like, two minutes or so), he felt like he was going to burst a blood vessel somewhere in his body, so he wheezed out, âRin. Are you done? I gotta let you down now.â
âOh, yeah. You can let me down.â
He released his grip on her legs and she dropped back down into standing position behind him. Grabbing his lower back in pain, he turned to her looking like a crippled old man.
Rin laughed in his face. âFeeling sorry for yourself now, huh? I told you.â
He waved his hand, straightening up with a groan. âYeah, yeah. Did you get any nice pictures?â
âHmm. Letâs see.â She looked at her phone, then moved in close to show him her screen. âTheyâre not too bad, besides the dozens of heads in the foreground.â
It was strange, oddly disproportionate, the way Mt Fuji loomed over the busy streets of Tokyo. The sky was a beautiful array of golds and oranges and yellows; a perfect sunset for a perfect birthday.
âTheyâre nice,â he said. He glanced up from her phone to look at her, becoming aware of their distance, and aware of her ogling up at him. The golden light coming through the windows lit up her face, brought out the highlights of her hair, accentuated the freckles on her cheeks.Â
Wow, he thought, his breath getting caught in his throat. He was utterly in love with her.
Much to his surprise, Rinâs face seemed to be moving closer. And so was he, his body unconsciously moving forward, down to her like drawn to a magnet.Â
Her eyes fluttered closed, head tilting.Â
Their lips were about an inch away from touching when a child right beside them started screaming. Immediately, Len was drawn out of his strange daze, jumping away from Rin. She seemed to do the same thing, putting at least a metre space between them.
Her face was bright red, and she forced her fingers back through her hair with a nervous laugh. âYou know, we should get going before everyone else gets the same idea,â she said, acting as if nothing ever happened.
Len blinked, unsure if heâd just imagined what happened thirty seconds prior, or if he was really just about to kiss his best friend in front of thirty or so strangers. He decided not to think about it. âRight. Thatâs a good idea.â
So they headed for the elevators and made a quick escape before the crowds followed. His head was still spinning as they walked down the footpath back towards the entrance to the underground walkway. The sky was now fading to a deep blue; bare remnants of the day clinging in streaks of orange above their heads.
Rin tugged on his sleeve, pointing a finger at something across the intersection they stood. âHey. I want to check that out.â
It was a parkâShinjuku Chuo Park, to be exact. Heâd seen it on the map when researching where to go with her, didnât think much of it. There was a waterfall display and some flowerbeds, people lurking about. There were winding paths and a handful of trees lining them, a maze within the middle of the city.
He shrugged his shoulders.
It wasnât like he was in a hurry or anything. They had time, still, to go for dinner, if Rin was keen on it. She seemed awfully pensive compared to before, though, as they crossed the road and made their way over to the park.
He wondered if heâd said or done something wrong. Or⌠if what had happened between them with the whole phone-and-faces-getting-close-like-they-were-going-to-kiss-or-something had like, offended her.
They strolled down the winding path of the park in silence. There was a playground, some monuments, and finally, a shrine.
Rin slowed to a stop, staring at the shrine. He halted beside her.
âYou want to pray?â Len asked.
She was quiet, before shaking her head. âNo. Itâs alright.â She glanced up at him, a small smile. âI was thinking, letâs go sit down somewhere.â
He obeyed, and they set off again, finding a lone seat along the footpath nearby. There were still a few people out and about, but it was relatively quiet. It had long turned to night, the cityscape surrounding them lighting up like tetris blocks.Â
Their shoulders bumped, and Rin eased herself against him, before bringing her head down to rest on his shoulder.
His heart hummed to life in his chest, but he tried to ignore it.
âThis is really nice,â she said, her voice soft. âThis was a really nice day, Len.â
After a moment of hesitation, he lowered his cheek against the top of her hair, taking in the familiar scent of her favourite shampoo. A hint of something floral, a hint of something citrusâand a hit of something Rin.
He hummed. âIâm glad.â
Rin was silent for a passing moment, before she spoke again. âDo you know what would make it even better?â
Lenâs stomach growled. âGusto?â he half-joked.
âNo.â She pulled her head away to look at him, and the cool night air hit his cheek like a slap to the face. He stared back down at her, captured by her gaze.
It was happening again. The whole moving-in-close thing, that was. Her face was getting bigger, and he could feel her hot breath tickling the tip of his nose. His head ducked down to close the gap between them, catching her wet mouth with his own so suddenly that he pulled away, shocked at the boldness of his actions.
Rin didnât seem to care, though. Her hand went up to the back of his head and pulled him back down to her lips. It was sloppy, kind of gross, but they didnât care. It was their first time. It wasnât supposed to be perfect.
She kept him in place, balling up the fabric of his t-shirt with her fists. He allowed himself to melt into the kiss, hands trailing down to hold her by the waist. He wasnât expecting the day to really end with them sitting in the middle of a park in Shinjuku making out, but he wasnât mad by the outcome, either.
When they pulled away to breathe, Rin smiled something nervous, her lips glistening under the glow of the city lights. Her hands unravelled themselves from his shirt.Â
âBetter,â she said.
Len was stunned silent, just stared at her. He wasnât sure if what happened had just happened. So he went back in for another kiss; this time a little bit more tender, less wet.Â
âSo Gumi and Miku were right,â he thought aloud against her mouth.
Rin pulled back a bit to give him this horrified look. âWhat did they tell you.â It wasnât even posed as a question. Sheâd already made the assumption theyâd told him something awful.
He chuckled nervously. âWell, uh, I tried asking their opinion what to do for your birthdayâŚâ
She raised an eyebrow. âAnd?â
âThey straight up told me to ask you out.â
Her eyes narrowed into slits. âThose bitches.â
His lips curled. âWell, I mean. It helped. Somewhat.â
âYeah.â She frowned, reaching up to curl a strand of her hair around a finger. âI canât believe they justâso blatantly did that, though. Even after I begged them not to say anything.â
She begged them? Wow. âI thought they were joking up until five minutes ago, Rin. You know I donât take anything they say seriously.â
Rin sighed. âYeah, butââ She paused, thinking, before tossing her shoulders. âWell, it doesnât matter anymore anyway. I just want to know, Lenâ is this a date?â
Len pressed his forehead against hers. Gazed into her eyes. They were a dark blue; alluring, always drawing him in, keeping him in orbit around her like a planet to its star. He admitted, âNot my original intention, no, but I think the simp in me was projecting a bit much that it ended up being one anyway.â
She cracked a grin. âSimp, huh,â she said. She lifted a hand to his jaw, trailed her fingers along it until her palm was resting on the back of his head. He wanted to shudder into her touch. âWell, kiss me more. Iâm not done making the most of my birthday privileges yet.â
He opened his mouth. âI can kiss you like this every day if you wanââ
She silenced him with her lips, closing the space between them once again.
.
[epilogue]
The following weekend, Len knocked on Kaitoâs door with a weekâs worth of his favourite lemonade-flavoured popsicles in one hand.
Kaitoâs eyebrows shot up into the ceiling upon spotting the bag of goodies. âWhatâs this?â he asked.
âA thank you gift,â Len said, handing it over.
âHuh.â Kaito took them, a confused expression on his face. âWhat for?â
âYour idea about the date? It worked. Rin and I are a thing now.â
A lengthy silence followed.
âYou mean⌠you two werenât dating before?â
#fanfiction#vocaloid#vocaloid fanfiction#rin kagamine#len kagamine#kagamine rin#kagamine len#rinlen#lenrin#rinxlen#lenxrin#miku hatsune#hatsune miku#gumi#megpoid#kaito#srry i forgot to crosspost here too#but i do have an ao3 under the same name where you can read more of my stuff#in case you havent figured that out yet...
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I love ur hc! Can u do some on jealous he tian of people hitting on his mo? Either if itâs at his work or out in public at the store or something
im really glad you like my past headcanons, anon!! im always happy when someone enjoys them even if at this point theyâre starting to get pretty old, so thank you!! ( ´ â˝ ` ).・ď˝âĄ
i.. actually havenât written any headcanon in more than two years by now, iâve been keeping them in my mind for all this time and to tell you the truth iâve started to feel a bit self conscious about them. back in the days i also ended up disappearing without fullfilling a lot of requests, which makes me feel pretty bad⌠that being said, though, i did have some time between yesterday and today and at this point you all know tianshan always makes me lose it, so i did try to write down something
im not sure if this is exactly what you wanted, or if this is how you pictured it go, but i hope youâre gonna enjoy it anyway!!
so the keyword here is CLINGY
when he tian gets jealous he also gets clingier than usual, if thatâs even possible
it starts one day while he is waiting for guan shan to end his shift at the grocery store so they can walk home together
after that first time he tian helped him out, guan shan made it clear that he didnât want he tian to disturb him while he was working anymore, so these days he tian just waits for him outside, or roams around the store checking out the pre-made meals as guan shan sends him warning looks and he tian smiles back at him like the picture of innocence
doesnât matter where he is, though, girls from different schools always come flocking around him, some just staring and blushing and whispering to their friends, others - the bolder ones - even asking him for his name and number and if he is there alone
he tian smiles and answers them politely, but never particularly minds them, that is until one day he notices that the one some girls are whispering about and looking at is not him, but guan shan
at the moment, guan shan is lifting up a heavy case full of oranges, the color of them almost matching his hair, his white tanktop sticking to his chest for working up a sweat and the muscles in his arms bulging because of the effort, a serious look of concentration on his face
he tian almost forgets to excuse himself from all the adoring girls around him and before anyone can realize it he is already sliding an arm around guan shanâs shoulder and standing close to him with a âlittle mo, this case seems really heavy, let me help you with itâ
guan shan of course tells him off and yells at him to take all his fan group away with him, and he tian quickly understands that guan shan is completely oblivious to the attention he is receiving
maybe because he had to grow used at people whispering behind his back since at a young age, what with all the situation with his dad, guan shan doesnât seem to notice all the girls looking at him adoringly, and if he finds strange that suddenly so many girls are asking him to grab something from a top shelves for them, his shirt riding up to reveal a flash of his toned stomach, then he doesnât really show it
he tian almost finds it amusing when he hears guan shan complaining about the amount of girls around the store making it hard for him to work, blaming he tianâs presence for it and not realizing at least half of them are there for guan shan himself, and sometimes he thinks about making guan shan aware of that even just to see his reaction, but thinking back on what he said about modeling, he tian is not sure guan shan would be comfortable with all the attention
he tian is also not particularly fond at how outright flirty some girls get when asking guan shan informations, twirling their hair around their finger and touching guan shan briefly on the arm to call for his attention or thank him, so he keeps the thing to himself, and when guan shan is done with his shift he tian makes sure to guide him outside with a hand resting on his lower back, leaning against him closer than necessary and talking directly into guan shanâs ear
then one day, at school, guan shan gets stopped in the school hallway by a girl from some class over stuttering a small âs-sorryâ at him
thinking that the girl is yet another one looking for he tian, guan shan tells her that he doesnât know where he tian is, but the girl just pushes something at his chest before running away
guan shan realizes he now has a love letter in his hands, all cute and pink and with a small heart sticker closing it, and suddenly pissed off he marches to he tian and shoves the letter to his face, yelling at him to tell his girlfriends that he is not he tianâs personal mail man
he tian asks him if he is jealous and then adds that if guan shan really wants to get a love letter he tian can always write him one
guan shan flips him off, telling him to stop saying weird things before going back to his class, and he tian forgets about the letter until he gets home that evening
he tian is pretty used to receive this kind of letters, and he usually just skims over them quickly so he knows what to thank the girl for before rejecting her gently, but as soon as he reads the first line he tian realizes the letter is not for him, but for guan shan
so this is where maybe some people wonât agree with me, but in a case like this i actually do believe that in the end he tian would deliver the letter to guan shan, even if deep down he is afraid of what might happen, if only because he knows that even if he destroys the letter now, he canât keep guan shan away from that girl forever, one day guan shan is gonna find out anyway
he tian stays up all night reading that letter over and over again, and at one point he even texts guan shan to wear the black studs he tian gave him the following day, but of course guan shan reply is âfuck offâ
the next day at school, he tianâs eye bags are worse than usual when he goes to find guan shan during break and hands him the letter with a small âfor youâ
thereâs a moment of silence, then guan shan blushes bright red and starts yelling and hitting he tian because he actually thought that he tian made good on what he said the previous day and actually wrote him a love letter
needless to say thatâs the first thing to put a smile on he tianâs face in the entire day and he teases guan shan about it but sombers up quickly to tell him that the letter guan shan handed him over yesterday wasnât for him
guan shan doesnât really believe him at first, even after reading the letter himself he still looks doubtful, asking he tian if he put her up to it, but after a while he finally convinces himself that the letter is genuine and his cheeks get a rosy tint
he tian, because sometimes he goes as far as twisting the knife in his own wound, asks guan shan what he is gonna reply to her
âhow am i supposed to know, im not like you, this is the first time something like this happens to me, i donât even know what she sees in meâ âyou put yourself down too much, youâre a very handsome guyâ âitâs not like im gonna believe that just because you say it!â âshe seems to think so too. arenât you gonna say yes to her?â (please imagine he tian saying all this with his hair covering his eyes and the saddest smile on his face) âhow should i put it⌠she is a very cute girl, and i think she is sincere, but these are all impressions she got of me. she doesnât really know me.â âso? thatâs what dating is for, isnât it? so that you can get to know each other. i think⌠if sheâd get to see the real you, sheâd just end up liking you more and moreâ (shout out if you get the parallel)
guan shan yells at him once again to stop saying this kind of things, and then leaves saying he is gonna think about it
as you can imagine, he tian doesnât have a good day: he spends the entire day silent and withdrawn, so much so that even the girls start to get worried about him, and once again he doesnât sleep at all at night
the next day, while he is walking down the hallway towards the cafeteria with jian yi and zheng xi, he catches a glimpse of red out of the window and he freezes on the spot: guan shan is in the courtyard with a girl, both of them looking embarrassed and blushing slightly
jian yi and zheng xi notice that he tian stopped and follow his gaze to guan shan, and you can imagine jian yiâs reaction: he plasters himself against the window asking zheng xi if he is really seeing what he thinks he is seeing and then asking he tian if he knows who is the girl
he tian however doesnât reply to him and after a moment he keeps walking without saying another word
later, jian yi and zheng xi catch guan shan alone, and jian yi asks him all the details since they saw him talking to a girl, to which guan shan blushes and tells him to mind his own business
âhe tian was with usâ zheng xi says to guan shan âhe should be down to the basketball courtâ âwhat should i care where he isâŚâ zheng xi smiles. âjust sayingâ
despite what he said, guan shan does go look for he tian and sits down next to him on one of the banches
âshould i congratulate you?â he tian asks after a while. âabout what?â âhaving a girlfriend. thatâs a big achievement. donât close mountain is all grown up nowâ a beat, then âi turned her downâ. he tianâs eyes go wide in surprise. âshe is very prettyâ guan shan continues âbut i donât know if sheâs exactly my type. plus, im working most of the time after school and in the weekends, i donât really have the time to deal with a girlfriend now.â
he tian looks up at him for the first time and finally notices that guan shan is wearing the black studs he tian bought him
he tian smiles and leans on the side to rest his head on guan shanâs shoulders, to which guan shan asks him what the hell is he doing all of a sudden
âlittle mo, letâs go somewhere together after schoolâ âwhy should i go with you, im busy with work anywayâ âthen letâs have dinner together at my apartment after youâre doneâ âdonât wannaâ
even after getting together, i think this is how he tian will mostly show his jealousy to anyone hitting on guan shan: if he is there as well, heâll mostly stick close to guan shan, putting an arm around his shoulders or his waist, smiling and answering politely at whoever guan shan is talking to but making perfectly clear using their body language that guan shan is very much already involved with someone
he trusts guan shan completely and would never limit him, even if sometimes he tian worries for guan shanâs safety since he still has a hard time realizing people are flirting with him
but most of the time he just turns this on his favor, using the excuse that someone was hitting on guan shan to hold his hand in public or ask him for a kiss when they get home because that really upsetted him
he tian also tends to be a biter in bed, so itâs not the first time he leaves evident bitemarks and hickeys on guan shanâs neck and shoulder and clavicles for everyone to see. guan shan is not too fond of it because he still doesnât like the idea to be owned, but he tian is his just as much as he is he tianâs, so in the end, even if he still yells at he tian for leaving them, he doesnât actually particularly mind them
#19 days#tianshan#he tian#mo guanshan#i did not reread this so forgive me for any blatant mistake#this sure was.. something#can't remember the last time i wrote so much#anyway im not sure if i like this or how it is but it was nice to trying get back to it#so thank you for your ask anon and thank you again for liking my headcanons!!#hope you're gonna have a wonderful day!!#ask#anon#tianshan headcanons
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never a bother
also available on ao3
post-endgame + hurt/comfort
whumptober 2019 prompts:Â stab wound & secret injury, embrace
word count: 2033
At 11:14 pm, Tony still hasn't received a text from Peter, but he lets it slide. The kid's school night curfew is at 11pm, but being late by fifteen to twenty minutes once won't make a difference, he convinces himself. He could easily open Karen's live feed and check for himself where Peter is, but he's practicing self-restraint these days, and trusting the kid to follow the curfew and text him once he makes it home safe is an important part of it.
So he waits.
Morgan is asleep and Pepper's at her office working late, so Tony distracts himself by preparing himself a cup of hot chocolate then heading back downstairs to work on some upgrades to Rhodey's suit. It gets his mind off Peter for a while, but then he receives a text from May, who's wondering if he heard from Peter. She's working a late shift and still hasn't received a text either.
He checks the time. 11:53 pm. Still no text.
He sighs, pulling his chat with the kid open and sending him a quick text. You back home yet?
Tony stares at it for a few seconds, clicks his tongue in annoyance and is about to go and check Karen's live feed when the app informs him his message was read. He waits a few more seconds, but when Peter doesn't make a move to start typing to answer him, Tony hits the call button.
It rings twice before Peter answers it.
"Hey, Tony! Sorry!"
"You better be," Tony mutters, sagging in relief at knowing his kid is fine. "Are you home?"
"Yes, sorry, uh, forgot to text you," Peter answers, but his voice comes up a bit muffled, as if he's holding his phone between his cheek and shoulder.
"It's fine, kiddo, just make sure you remember next-"
He interrupts himself when Peter emits a loud hiss and then a yelp, and that has Tony tensing on the spot immediately. A loud noise follows this then everything stops, and Tony can't hear anything.
"What is it?" he urges, sitting straight on his chair. "Peter?"
Tony hears a soft noise, then a voice. "Sorry, I dropped my phone," Peter says, suddenly lowering his tone. "Uh, it's kinda dark because May's sleeping, so I can't see anything."
Tony frowns. "I was texting her just two minutes ago, though? Isn't she working a late shift?"
Peter is suddenly silent. "Uh," he says after a few moments. "I forgot."
"Peter," Tony starts carefully, seeing through him right away even though he can't even actually see the kid. "What is going on? What did you do?"
"Nothing, nothing, like I said the lights were out so I couldn't see anything but-"
This time Peter interrupts himself with another hiss, and Tony has had enough. Without bothering to pull his phone away from his face so Peter can't hear him, he calls out to FRIDAY, asking her to get Peter's vitals from Karen.
They appear on his screen a few seconds later, and Peter's panicked reassurances soon become muffled by the ringing in Tony's ears originated from the raw panic he feels from looking at the data in front of him.
Small tear in the suit, right portion of the lower abdomen. Low blood pressure.
Just as quick as he lost it, Tony gets back.
"I don't want to hear another single word from you," Tony manages to say in almost a whisper. He think his voice will crack if he raises it too much. "I'm calling Happy to pick you up and get you to the Compound. Stay exactly where you are and don't do anything stupid."
As he speaks, he's already heading upstairs to let Pepper know what's going on. As he climbs up the steps to her office, he puts Peter on hold and dials Happy, who answers right away.
"What's up, boss?"
"I need you to pick Peter up," he says as he opens the door to the office. Pepper look up from her desk with her eyebrows raised, clearly not pleased at being interrupted, but her expression quickly morphs into something concerned. He certainly looks like a hot mess, trembling all over and on the verge of a panic attack. "He- He's been fucking stabbed and decided not to let anyone know, he probably hacked the suit again, and he's at home. I need- I need you to get him to the Compound. I'll meet you guys there."
"On it," he hears Happy say, and the sound of quick footsteps on the other side of the line. He hangs up and Tony's back with Peter, who has gone scarily silent.
"Peter?" he asks just as Pepper makes it to stand in front of him, placing a hand on his arm. When the kid doesn't answer right away, he feels his heart hammer against his heart. "Kid, for fuck's-"
"I'm here, I'm here, sorry," Peter replies hurriedly. "I'm fine, Tony, it has happened be-"
"Don't even finish that sentence, I don't wanna know," Tony snaps, finally raising his voice because the idea of Peter treating a fucking stab wound without him knowing is completely horrifying, and it just won't do Tony any good right now. "Just- Listen, Happy is going to pick you up and take you to the Compound. I'll meet you guys there, should take an hour or so. According to what Karen has shown me you should be fine by then."
"Tony, you really don't need to-"
"Shut up, I don't want to know. See you there. Tell Karen to call me immediately in case something happens, but I'll have her on alert if your conditions worsen."
He hangs up, takes a shuddering breath. Pepper places her other hand on his other arm, and squeezes gently.
"I'll let May know once her shift ends," she says.
"Okay," Tony nods, feeling a sharp pang in his chest. He places his hand on her shoulder for support, and feels that it's a little bit harder to draw in the next breath. And the next one.
"Tony," Pepper starts. "Hey, he'll be fine, honey."
"I know," he nods shakily, suddenly feeling like his legs might give out. He quickly makes it to the loveseat in the corner of the room, then buries his face on his hands, willing himself to just get over with it. He needs to get going. He needs to get to Peter who is bleeding out on his own-
"Tony, breathe," he hears Pepper, and when he comes back to it she's kneeling in front of him, hands on his knees. She gently takes one of his hands and places it on top of her chest, which is rising and falling slowly with her breathing. "Breathe with me."
At first, like always, it's hard. But he attempts to follow the rhythm of Pepper's breathing under his palm, tries to count along with her, and it begins to work. He starts to see more clearly, even though his heart rate is still too high.
"He'll be fine," she repeats softly, but firmly. "It is not like last time, honey. He'll be fine by tomorrow and come over this weekend again, like he always does, and we'll spend time together. He's fine, I know it. You can tell by the way he was arguing back with you, yeah?"
Tony manages a weak and wet chuckle and nods. He tries to repeat her words to himself, that it is not like last time, he's not even losing much blood, but it's so fucking hard. Just the thought of Peter hurting in any way makes his skin crawl. Living for five years without him was too much, and now that he miraculously came back, any threat of losing him again, no matter how small it is, is too terrifying. But he doesn't think Peter understands - he's still the same, and probably has no idea what those five years were like. The mourning. The missing. Tony doesn't blame him, but it surely makes his job harder.
It's been only five months since he came back, and Tony is not ready to let him out into the world just yet again, it seems. He just wants to see Peter safe.
It takes a few more minutes to fully calm down, but then he's ready to go. He kisses Pepper goodbye, promises he will update her on everything, then sets off.
x
Due to the time it took Tony to leave home, he arrives after them at the Compound even though he was flying. He meets Happy at the entrance to the medbay, who tells him Bruce already stitched Peter up, who's now resting.
"Thank you, Hap," he says, a bit dizzily. The other man pats him on the shoulder as he moves past him towards Peter's room.
The lights are dim inside, but Peter's wide awake sitting on the bed. Tony lets out a sigh of relief at the sight of him, hurriedly closing the door behind him before approaching the bed with quick steps.
It looks like Peter was about to say something, but Tony stops him by pulling him into a tight embrace, still minding his wound. He tucks Peter's head right beneath his chin, presses a kiss right on top of it.
"Never," he begins quietly, a bit shakily. "Do that again."
"I'm sorry," Peter replies.
Tony gives him a squeeze before pulling back, placing his hands on the kid's shoulders. "Why did you think it was a good idea not to tell anyone, hm?" he inquiries. "Is this still about the whole I'm a teenager, I can do everything my myself thing?"
"No, just," Peter sighs, looking away. "I just didn't want to bother anyone."
"Bother?" Tony echoes, shocked. "Peter, you were stabbed. And yeah, we're still going to talk about how you got Karen into not telling me," he adds as a side note, to which Peter cringes. "That's an emergency. You have the right to bother me."
"I know, but-"
"You know what, even if it wasn't an emergency," Tony continues. "Even if it was scratch, I would like you to tell me. I want to know everything, and that would never bother me, you hear me? Where did you even get that from, kiddo?"
He brushes a curl away from Peter's forehead, feeling helpless and honestly, a bit heartbroken. Hearing Peter admit that he thinks telling Tony he's been stabbed would bother him is one of the fucking saddest things he's ever heard. Is he doing anything wrong?
"I know you would want to come here, and I didn't want you to leave home this late because of me, especially because I only let this happen because I was stupid during patrol," Peter murmurs, avoiding his eyes.
Tony holds him by the shoulders again, giving him a squeeze. "Kiddo, listen to me carefully. You know how long five years can be?" he says, and Peter looks right back at him. "That's half a decade. A pretty long time if you ask me. Hell, I went five entire years without looking after you. Even though I had great moments, especially with Morgan, I missed you so much through it all, Pete. And I got a miracle, you know. I got you back. And now... I just want to make sure you're safe, so it never happens again, you get that? You would never bother me."
Peter nods and Tony watches as his eyes well up with tears. "Sorry," he croaks again, and it's all it takes for Tony to pull him in again.
"C'mere," he mutters, letting the kid sniffle softly against his jacket. "I know things changed drastically for you and your Aunt, so let me help you get back on track, yeah? Don't hide things, please."
"I won't," Peter promises quietly, fisting the back of Tony's jacket.
Tony knows it will be a hard promise to keep up with, but now that he knows what's going on inside the kid's head, he'll be there all the way, paying even more attention.
He turns his head only to press a kiss on Peter's temple, and the kid holds him just a bit tighter.
#irondad#whumptober 2019#tony stark#peter parker#fic#fanfic#mine#avengers endgame fix it#no.8#no.24#no.31
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