#It's the least thing I can do to same my lazy ass self

[shinmiyovvi]

What if there was a Primis version of Salvatorix Crew...? I should start making that tho

[ccuniculusmolestus]

one thing the tsh fandom will do is constantly overlook the significance and also implications of henry and bunny's friendship in favor of relationships like henry and camilla. (and these were all realizations i had while talking to a friend so-)

we never see Bunny directly break down. well, we never see anything period because we're looking through Richard's eyes, and Richard never sees Bunny upset. I don't mean the upset where he's being mean or being a drunk in his dorm, I mean the kind of upset where he's sobbing and yelling out insults and threats and wrestling with Henry on the floor of their palazzo. I'm talking the kind of upset where he's screaming at Henry to stop touching him while crying in his bed.

We only ever hear that fight, and the other one in Rome we just get to hear of it. None of the others ever saw Bunny in that state, and I doubt they knew how the situation even arose. Only Henry did.

Only you know the way that I break.

And matter of fact, nobody saw Henry genuinely angry too. Even when he was dealing with Charles, he wasn't pissed per se, he was just annoyed and more ready to commit his third murder. I can't remember a scene where Henry genuinely loses it with someone he knows well (so, none of his friends). We only hear of him losing his shit with Bunny EXCEPT for the scene with Judy.

You push my buttons in a way nobody else can.

You know that makes me think, again, that him losing his shit at the party had less to do with Judy and more to do with Bunny. Think about it. Why would they be at a party where Bunny is nowhere to be seen? Why wouldn't Bunny, a party animal, be there with them? You'd think he might have invited the others, or at least heard of their intent to go and wanted to join them- but he just wasn't there. Why? What made the perfectly composed, stoic Henry lose his shit over something that, characteristically, shouldn't even annoy him? Who was later established to be the only thing in Henry's life capable of making him snap to the point of losing all self-control and resorting to violence?

That's right.

Bunny.

In every other case of aggressive, intentional, sober violence displayed by Henry, Bunny is the cause, on the receiving end, both times.

Henry and Bunny knew each other too much, way too much, and I'm tired of pretending theirs was not perhaps the most significant relationship in this story. Put aside the fact that the story is literally DRIVEN by them, put aside even the fact that they both are the only ones to die at the end (too much symbolism here kms), but their relationship genuinely is so fucked up and heavy it leaves more questions the more you think about them. So no, I don't think "Camilla was the only one who saw Henry for who he was" just because she was the recipient of his occasional smiles, because Henry was not just the gentle-giant she got to see. Neither do I believe "Richard was on the same frequency as Henry" because they had a shitty childhood (tbh all of them probably did?) and because Henry saved his ass from freezing. Henry was more so his rage and the anger he tried to keep sealed with the rest of himself, a destructive force trying desperately to reign himself in. Yes, he was not a bad person per se, but he was, like Bunny, a ticking time bomb (albeit a much more destructive one).

But even despite the anger and bitterness that later poisoned their relationship, I sometimes like to think of them whilst keeping in mind the fact that Bunny was the only one who could make Henry laugh. And Henry was the only one Bunny directly told about his past/home life. I think of them as freshmen, with Bunny's hair catching the sunlight in his lazy curls as his eyes crinkle and his tone rears back in preparation for a joke Henry doesn't see coming. And Henry, awkward in his detachment, with his nose in a book, trying to keep his lips from quivering up as the awful, stupid joke registers, and then failing to keep the chuckle from slipping through when Bunny's stupidly expectant face wriggles its eyebrows at him.

They were soulmates before they were friends.

And they were friends before they were enemies

[osamucide]

nsfw alphabet - osamu dazai . . . .ᐟ

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

wc: 2.1k

cw: gn!reader - no explicit anatomy mentioned, switch leaning sub!dazai, nicknames “pretty,” “honey,” and “babe” for reader, one instance of “daddy,” brief mentions of choking/spitting/slapping/marking/collaring/edging/dacryphilia, graphic mentions of cum, cum eating, CUM, degenerate!dazai my beloved

reid: no one asked for this i just be thinking uwu enjoy

. . . .ᐟ

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

it’s dazai - he’s lazy and kind of a princess. unless cleaning up is absolutely necessary (read: you both and the sheets are drenched in sweat and/or cum) he will just want to stay where you are and cuddle and be loved on

usually chatty afterward. loves to chit chat. if you’re too sleepy to hold a conversation, he’ll play with your hair and you can listen to him talk about the fall of the byzantine empire

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

dazai is aware that he has attractive hands. there isn’t a single part of himself he’s not at least a little conscious of, but he knows his hands are both pretty and skilled, so he might as well try to be proud of them!

can’t pick a favorite body part on his partner. it changes by the day. one day it’s your waist, the next it’s your hair, wednesday it’s your thighs, most fridays he prefers your hands, sometimes it’s your stomach, other days it’s your ass. . .

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

i know it tastes like sulfuric acid

cums so much. like an obscene amount.

he definitely has a thing for seeing you covered in his cum - whether it’s on your chest, face, back. . .

filthy nasty when it comes to cleanup. you made a mess on his fingers? he made a mess in your hands? your hole is dripping with his cum and yours? his mouth is on it. shameless

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

less dirty and more just embarrassing for him - he usually cries after make-up sex.

if you argue and then fuck it out, tears will be rolling down his face while he cums - he loves you so much! he doesn’t want a petty argument to ever make you rethink your relationship with him

if you notice this, no you don’t. to him it’s a fucking secret okay

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

while i do think he probably hoed around toward the end of/after his mafia days, i don’t think he’s as experienced as anyone expects him to be.

liked the feeling but hated the vulnerability. it was a tradeoff he wasn’t willing to make anymore at some point. eventually realized he needs to build up a level of trust with potential sexual partners

once that trust is built up though. hooo boy

that genius brain of his isn’t just for detective work

he’s intuitive and a quick learner. absolutely knows what he’s doing.

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

spoons.

lazy man loves to wrap one arm around your neck and play with you with his free hand while he thrusts into you from behind <3

really partial to any position that lets him bite your neck and kiss your face and groan in your ear (hopes you do the same to him)

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

can’t help the occasional one liner. he’s a natural comedian

dazai rather enjoys more playful sex where you both can laugh and talk throughout - sometimes it feels more intimate than serious, stone-faced sex

takes on a more serious air if he’s feeling jealous or insecure

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

will adhere pretty firmly to whatever your preference is!

if you have no preference, he just trims when he’s unruly - maybe once every two weeks or so

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

physically extremely sensual and aware of your body - little touches and breaths on your skin, lingering eyes, things that would get glossed over by anyone who isn’t a romantic at heart

tries (and succeeds) to swoon you verbally, too.

“need to feel you, please.”

“fuck- we fit s’ well together, don’t you think so?”

“‘m all yours, honey.”

“c’mon, pretty, fuck me like you own me.”

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

pillow humper.

he’s lazy! don’t get the idea that he’s above stroking himself because he’s not, but sometimes he just doesn’t feel like it

just imagine him in the first light of the morning waking up before his alarm with an unforgiving hard on. . .he was probably dreaming about you! and if you’re not there, what else is he supposed to do other than fold a pillow between his legs and grind on it until he cums in his boxers?

nnnnhhnmnmghshdhd pillow humper dazai <3

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

choke. this. man.

whether he’s topping bottoming subbing domming whatever he cums 10x harder when your hands are anywhere near his neck

likes fingers in his mouth uwu since he’s confident in his hands, he’s definitely into you sucking on his fingers too

pry his jaw open and spit on his tongue. he will gladly return the favor, if you wish

slap him if you’re comfortable. he’s down for it. he usually hates pain, but if it’s supplemental to pleasure?

big fan of biting and scratching too, both ways if you’ll indulge him.

likes having matching marks <3

leash and collar this man while he’s on his knees and tell him it’s where he belongs. he’ll agree!

edges the hell out of you when he doms. maybe likes to see you cry a little bit <3

on the softer side, he adores being praised - bonus points if you can mix in some subtle and tasteful degradation. loves being told how good he feels, how good he’s letting you use him, how good of a boy he is. . .

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

he prefers the privacy of your bedroom so he can completely let go of his reservations

buuuuuut also gets excited about car sex uwu something about how the windows fog up, and how desperate and feral it can feel. . .

at the end of the day, he’s never met a flat surface he couldn’t fuck on. if he wants you, he’ll find somewhere to have you

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

when you get intense about anything. discussing something you’re very passionate about? someone or something is visibly pissing you off? you’re road raging? dazai’s ready to drop ‘em

oh lord about to get the works cited page going. next bullet point references this post by user cqthqrtic (not tagging as to not surprise them with random nsfw content in their notifs, however if you see this, legend, and want tagged do let me know!), who pioneered my favorite degenerate!dazai and i think about him OFTEN

so with that, on a less wholesome note than the first one, i fully agree that calling him names like sicko, perv, freak, etc. gets him going like you would not fucking believe. he lives for your half-disgusted little reactions when he whispers filth in your ear in public or proposes some depraved shit like eating his own cum out of you. god forgive me

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

heavy, intense degradation. he’s already hyper-convinced that he’s a piece of shit. keep it to the classics; he likes being your dumb slut, your fucktoy, your brat, etc. and mix it up with praise. he does not like being called useless, bad, good for nothing else, etc.

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

a real eater. a proud munch. so fucking smug about it too

his mouth + his hands? you’re seeing god

cannot however deny how much he loves your mouth on his cock. he’ll almost never ask for it, but he’ll also never say no to it.

might get carried away and fuck your throat a little - don’t worry, he’ll compensate you. ride his face til he can’t breathe

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

almost always wants to take his time with you! he’s got a lot of self control and he uses that to his advantage

he can’t get over how tender it feels to bury his face in your neck, wrap his arms around you, and feel your nails in his back while he’s fucking you deep and unhurriedly

he loves slow, sleepy, lazy sex where his hands can just roam every inch of your body.

don’t get it twisted - dazai will absolutely fuck you fast and rough if you just say the word

want him to go faster and harder? give his hair a good tug <3

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

not his favorite methodology, last letter considered.

won’t decline if it’s to get out of work <3 bring him lunch at the office and he might just bend you over the bathroom sink

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he’ll try just about anything once.

this man spent his most formative years in a front row seat to observe humanity at its filthiest - anything that happens with mutual consent and good intent between you two in the bedroom can’t be that horrible.

besides, he loves discovering new kinks of his with you <3

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

only one or two rounds, maybe three on a good day, but he manages his time well.

spends anywhere from 15-30 minutes on foreplay on the first go around

will let you rest between rounds but continue kissing on you and teasing you lightly so it all just feels like one dreamy and continuous round

with his insane self control he could easily drag a couple rounds of sex out for hours. many hours.

however, he won’t usually keep you longer than three or so hours; on the flip side, he rarely spends less than 45 minutes on you.

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

not opposed to you bringing toys to the table, but no, he doesn’t own any.

he can makeshift some handcuffs out of a belt so quick - what would he need to buy them for?

not a fan of having toys used on him, but he’ll go to town on you if you want <3

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

oh brother

will hold off on cumming himself just so he can draw your orgasm out longer. sensing a theme here? when i tell you his self control is insane.

beg him all you want - he goes into it knowing exactly how long he’s going to edge you for <3

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he can hold himself back and be quiet. . .does not like to, though!

high quality triple x this-shit-rated-porn ass moans, sighs, grunts, and whines coming out of him regardless of his position. he was meant to be LOUD. he likes to let you know how good you make him feel!

cusses so much.

whatever he’s babbling gets so breathy and growly when he’s close

“thank you thank you thank you fuck thank you” while he cums <3

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

wanna make him bust on the spot? call him daddy while he’s in you <3

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

average thickness but god he’s long

we’re talkin pushing eight inches

no curve, very few veins, blushy pink tip

sticks straight up and twitches when he’s hard <3

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

contrary to popular (?) belief, i think his sex drive is average if not a little lower

mostly just up for it whenever you are! you bring it up? sure, he’s game <3

about who initiates sex: 60/40, you/him respectively.

if he’s not in the mood will say some really lame and uncomfortably silly shit like “i think mr. pinky’s asleep right now babe” 👎

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

no he wants. to. CHAT

has enough trouble sleeping at night as it is! kind of just wants to go back to snuggling and hanging out when you’re done

again if it’s bedtime and you’re sleepy, he’ll just talk softly about whatever until he hears you snoring.

might pick up a book for an hour or so before joining you in the dream world <3

always smooches you goodnight whether you’re awake or not.

[andythesilly]

i gave in so uhh intro post time yay

BEWARE KINDA LONG INTRO POST

hiya hi hello everybody !!

☆- my name is andy !! (you can also call me andrew both are okay)

☆- transmasc gay asexual deminonbinary • he/him

☆- birthday is april first/gen

☆- minor so please don't say weird stuff about me ty (fine with freaky jokes tho as long as they don't go too far)

☆- strawpage link even tho it's almost the same thing as here (i appreciate gimmicks :3)

☆- this is my sona ref for now i'll make a better one when,,, honk mimimimi 💤💤💤

☆- ⬆️ either way if you wanna make him look somehow more accurate here's some pictures of like,,, my hair at least ,,,

MY INTERESTS !! :D

purple means the stuff i like a little more than the rest • blue means the ones i'll be currently posting/be more active about • in order from least to most recent

☆- Vocaloid

☆- Project Sekai

☆- Murder Drones

☆- Regretevator (Roblox)

☆- Omori

☆- Pressure (Roblox)

☆- Gravity Falls

☆- Block Tales (Roblox)

☆- Tally Hall

☆- Love of The S*n/LOTS (Object Show)

☆- Ride the Cyclone (Musical)

☆- The Ghost and Molly McGee

☆- Albuquerque: the Movie

☆- Weezer

☆- House MD

☆- Deltarune (and a little bit of Undertale)

favorite characters from each of these pieces of media <<

feel free to interact if you have any interests in common :D

FAV MUSIC ARTISTS !!

☆- Kikuo (vocaloid producer)

☆- Ghost and Pals (vocaloid producer)

☆- Bo en

☆- TALLY HALL & MIRACLE MUSICAL !!

☆- Joe Hawley

☆- Rob Cantor

☆- Edu (Andrew Horowitz)

☆- Cojum Dip

☆- WEEZER !!

☆- WEIRD AL YANKOVIC !!

☆- Regretevator OSTs

☆- Omori OSTs

My hobbies !!

purple are the ones i do most often

☆- drawing

☆- listening to music

☆- playing video games (currently playing undertale :})

☆- watching shows and movies (currently watching house md !!)

☆- playing piano

☆- programming

☆- reading (will always be science, fiction, or science fiction)

Things i like in no specific order whatsoever :]

☆- Sudoku

☆- Rubik's cubes (and solving them)

☆- minesweeper

☆- just puzzles of any kind

☆- Jade Harley from Homestuck

☆- Joey Claire from Hiveswap

☆- THE COLOR PURPLE !!!!

☆- science in general

☆- robotics

☆- RMS Titanic (the actual ship, not the movie)(btw if you ask me about this specific topic i will start infodumping like crazy so i recommend you refrain from doing so)

☆- actually just sunken ships in general (eg. RMS Olympic, HMHS Britannic, Costa Concordia, etc)

☆- all things milk chocolate (cakes, cupcakes, bars, ect)(without any nuts ofc)

☆- carbohidrates (rice, bread, pasta)

☆- time travel

☆- paradoxes

☆- multiverses (i do not believe in them but i find them interesting)

☆- the history of the lightbulb

☆- Back to the Future trilogy (don't really have a specific date for this one so that's why i didn't put it in interests)

☆- the album pinkerton by weezer: oh my jod i know i already mentioned i like them and they're one of my favorite music artists and all that but like,,, this album is so peak i can't explain it in words (da vinci by weezer reference)

uhh there's probably more that i don't remember

Dni >:[

☆- basic criteria

☆- eh just don't be mean nor a bigot to me

Extras !!

☆- i speak english, spanish (first language) and am learning chinese !!

☆- certified twink yes i know

☆- live laugh love yaoi <333

☆- picky eater (of variety) that eats a lot (of quantity)

☆- procrastination final boss

☆- also a lazy ass

☆- i talk. a LOT. so please be aware of that whenever you ask me about a specific topic (mostly stuff i like)

☆- list of stuff that i plan to get into/want to know more about hehe..

☆- tags i use,,,, i swear i'll actually clean up my blog and its tags some day you guys you'll see,,,

☆- SELF PROCLAIMED #1 PINKERTON FAN !!!

☆- PANAMANIAN 🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦🇵🇦 WHAT THE FUCK IS A GOOD GOVERNMENT 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

☆- timezone is EST !!

☆- contrary to the belief of two or three people out there, my chosen name isn't andy because of Andrew Horowitz, it's just what i found close enough to my now deadname

☆- i love ALL my mutuals

☆- by my logic mutuals = friends so if you are a mutual, congrats, i consider you a friend :D

☆- feel free to tag me in any tag games or just posts that remind you of me hehe

☆- currently tagging mutuals in tag games that i know that will keep on tagging others so if i don't tag you please don't feel bad !!

☆- feel free to send me anything at my ask box or just dm me too since i love interacting with other people :D

☆- PLEASE ⬆️⬆️⬆️

☆- current pfp is susie from deltarune and banner is a pixelated edit of the album pinkerton from weezer (with susie's color palette) :}

☆- will probably edit this if i need to add/change something

☆- last edited on 7/31/2025 ^_^

as a thank you for reading, here's some cool blinkies of my interests :]

[incorrectfatui]

okay, more HCs. This one is only Scara, so things might get a lil dark- I'm not normal about him. anywho: Scaramouche: -autistic. I am going to say this about every Harbinger, bc it's the truth. -most traumatized mfer in all of Teyvat. Seriously. someone give this guy a licensed therapist. -as Kabukimono, he's tried to eat several non edible items. This one is inspired by that one researcher who made up a story about him eating a humans arm. The image of little Scara munching on various dangerous items is so cute -related to the above: he still does it sometimes, to fuck with people. Dottore thinks its great. Pierro had to stop him from getting Kuni to eat a delusion. -Eyes (& markings) always glow at least slightly, even if he's not using his powers. Its not really noticeable in the day, but at night you can see it pretty well -hates Pantalone. Not bc he's jealous of him hanging out with Dottore or something (if anything, Pantalone gets jealous), but just because he is an ass. -Went to the Abyss again for a long time, just after Arlecchino became a Harbinger, and kind of forgot that Crucy was replaced. Came back and was like "who the FUCK- oh right". Why? because I think its funny -In general, has a better relationship with most of the female Harbingers than the male ones. -a little self indulgent, but I like to think that he was able to float a lil with electro as well. We see Raiden and Ei do it, and I think it'd be cute if he was able to as well, if to a lesser degree. -has used almost every element at some point, testing delusions with Dotty. Mostly bc I can't really imagine all those researchers just throwing 4 extra elements at shouki no kami and being like "figure it out" -speaking of delusions: I think he didn't use one. His electro is inert and I dont think he used another element. I see people headcanoning his delusion as Anemo, and I get it, but I don't like it all that much -SPEAKING of his electro being inert to his body- I refuse to believe he lost electro completely. The whole "oh he used up his divinity" is lazy. He can still connect to Irminsul, which he only learned while ascending, but he cant use electro anymore, something that he's had since birth? Bullshit. I understand him not using it, but I think it'd be more impactful if that was a voluntary choice. I'd really like to see him recover it over the course of the story -I think Youkai like him. Obviously this excludes Yae Miko, but I think as Kabukimono it wouldn't be strange to see him being followed by some Tanuki or the lesser Kitsune. I would really like to see him interact with the Youkai Children from that one Inazuma event, I think it'd be really cute. -I like seeing people write about him and Kujou Sara, both romantic, platonic and as enemies. The two of them are very similar in some aspects, and then radically different in others. I think it'd be really interesting to see Kujou Sara confronted with her own trauma being reflected onto Ei. I guess this is mostly because I just really like Sara and I want my favs to interact xD -more of a theory, but I think Pierro and Dottore, (will) remember him. He has a lot of foreshadowing in his voiceline about Pierro & Dotty, and other things. He's very clearly endgame/lore relevant, with his story not even being finished. -not a HC, but I wanted to mention it: I'm still stuck in Inversion of Genesis on my main account. I never played past it. I did the Fontaine and Natlan quests for friends/watched them online, but I'm still in IoG on my main, because I never fully decided on a name -last one bc character limit: I really like to imagine him interacting with Neuvilette. I think there could be a lot of interesting discussions had here- Neuvi would absolutely dissaprove of his attempt to overthrow Nahida, but at the same time I think he would, to some degree, understand his obsession with the gnosis. No, the gnosis/authority doesn't belong to Scara (or Ei, for that matter), but I think if you told Neuvi that Scara was quite literally created to hold it, he'd understand, to a degree.

[cosmicwavelengths]

funny things i remember from sunset blvd (2024/jamie lloyd production)

when joe comes out of the body bag at the top of the show (i think tom was struggling a bit with the zipper, so from my perspective he kinda shimmied out of it lmfao)

"you've come to the right party ;)"

"i love it when you talk dirty"

"right now, i'd like to crawl into a hole and pull it in after me" same, betty

also her smile fading once she realizes that she talked shit about joe's script right in front of him lmfao

sheldrake echoing joe's earlier line ("i believe in self-denial") because joe is god's least favorite, apparently

joe's crashout is just yelling incoherently and stomping around in the circle like a toddler (i have no idea what he's saying)

"come to get your knife back? it's still there, right between my shoulder blades" (never change joe)

"i really liked it" "i'm all warm and runny inside" (lmfao joe)

"writers with pride don't live in LA" the shade

"I AM BIG - it's the pictures that got smaller" queen

"wait... did you say you were a writer?" "that's what it says on my guild card"

"looks like six very important pictures"

"i didn't know you were planning a comeback" "i Hate. that word. it's a return! :D"

"you shouldn't let another writer see your work, he may steal it" norma, looking him up and down "....i'm not afraid"

"i said SIT - DOWN...." music stops, cue joe looking around confused because there's no chair (or set) so he sits on the floor

nicole shaking ass to ALW is fucking hilarious ("PUMP PUMP")

"just how... old is salome?" "sixteen :D"

"i can say anything i want with my EYES"

nicole mouthing "i will kill you" (i think) into the camera

"well i'm pretty busy" "yea i don't care"

"don't you worry about moneyyyyy i'll make it worth your while honayyyy"

"how did you know i was staying here?" and max simply ignores him

"how did it go?" "well, i wish i were dead" real

joe as the uppity/out-of-work hack and betty being the studio smartass lol

while talking to betty, joe turns to the camera - "remember: it's only a movie" dramatic ass lol

when artie invites joe to his new year's party they do a cute handshake

max: "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN" with the camera right in his face

joe's dramatic ass "ohhh god" upon hearing they'll be watching norma's old "weepy melodramas"

honestly joe and norma's dynamic is very much black cat boyfriend/golden retriever girlfriend (except she is crazy) and it's pretty fun in itself

not technically funny, but the way joe holds norma's hand is so precious (in 'today is the day')

norma (pretending?) hyperventilating upon joe saying "its not about the money"

straight up going ("eughh?" at first ijbol)

joe teasing max about who's coming to norma's new years eve party ("maaaax")

"nonono not on the same floor as rudy valentino!"

max giving them party hats and throwing up some confetti with zero emotion

joe and norma doing dorky dances is the cutest thing ever (also "the perfect year" SLAPS thank you ALW)

joe dodging norma's attempt at kissing him so he kinda cradles her head

"there are noooo other guests :) just you :) and me :)))"

"i'm in love with you... surely, you know that, right?" - cue joe's look of :o (shock) bro was SHOOK

at the new year's party, the ensemble is kinda bumping and grinding to 'this time next year'

joe's reaction to betty still pushing along with dark windows - "well hallelujah :|"

some guy passes in front of the camera (while joe is addressing it) with a v sign lol (act one only bc i'm lazy atm but I WILL come back)

[pseudophan]

there’s this one anon in particular who is so fascinating imo bc they seem to go around to a great deal of phannie blogs who are only ever nice people minding their own business. and this anon’s like committed enough to constantly be doing this and has been for months now. yet despite that they’re like… not committed enough to send any sort of unique HATE? it’s only ever the same copy-pasted “ur not funny” “do u ever shut up” “ugly ass art” etc and it’s like all clearly the same guy and it’s like… what do u even get out of this…. what is this for…

low self esteem, poor mental health, bad life situation, pick your poison i suppose. i know it's sooo cliché but most of the time it literally is just people's lives being kinda shitty and feeling the need to take it out on others. doesn't make it okay of course, but i find that keeping that in mind really does make rude comments online a lot less hurtful. hell for me personally i've had a fair few anons reach out and apologise for having been mean to me several years prior, and the reasoning is always some variation of the above, and frankly i don't even blame them. yeah man, shit sucks, and sometimes you're gonna be a dick because of it. like it's giving hollywood movie script but it's unfortunately so real lol. but i think that's also part of why it seems like a lot of very kind people on here get the rudest asks, because if you have a strong urge to be mean to others and have enough self awareness to dislike that about yourself, of course someone who's generally just nice is gonna piss you off further. like as a certified hater and occasional miserable cunt, BOY have i gotten irrationally annoyed at people who appear happy and/or nice all the time lmao, like i might not be sending hate to anyone but i do at least somewhat understand the emotions behind it. you just gotta power through and not take it out on them though, is the thing

but really though. anon hate is sooo embarrassing. i could preach about how it's Mean And Bad cause yeah that too, but let's focus on the most important aspect, which is how incredibly cringe it is..... if you absolutely have be mean, say it with your whole chest! i hate the bullying culture they've got going on over on twitter (as a whole not just the phannies) but at least they're owning it. anon hate is just a pussy move lmao, especially if it's lazy like whoever this person going around is, like you said. cmon lets be creative here. i can appreciate a good insult! it's an art form, really. i think about 'maybe if you didn't use the q slur your dad wouldn't have left you, thank u next' every week of my life and it's been six years or so since i got that ask

ok obligatory disclaimer that you obviously shouldn't be a dick to people even if you're creative about it, but like there's at least tiers here and i would say anonymously going "ur not funny" is at the absolute bottom of the list lol

[crushedsweets]

can u tell me abt ur au's liu a little bit

- 🥸 definitely not machine in a trench coat

hiiiiii stranger whos not machine ^_^ <33

ok so. liu is a huge WIP imma be real. him and jeff keep changing a LOT cuz 1. my irl friends and i made a crp AU and their faves ended up being jeff and liu so i keep getting swayed by their HCs even tho they conflict my own 2. the woods brothers have always been kinda unfinished/half assed in my AU and im tryna catch up.

SO IM GONNA USE THIS POST TO HELP ME MESSILY ORGANIZE MY THOUGHTS

SO.............unfortunately, liu's character is VERY reliant on jeff's. So I’ll keep bringing up Jeff. Soz

they're half brothers, same mom. Born and raised New Jersey

i'm imagining a whole messy thing with their parents. i'm still indecisive if i want their mom to cheat on liu's dad, resulting in jeffs birth, and they tried to sweep it under the rug for the family's image. regardless, liu's biological dad still raised both boys, and he's the one jeff kills when jeff goes on his rampage

this is mostly cuz i want jeff's dad to be a deadbeat who ends up in jail, while liu's dad maintains a better image. hence the whole golden child, black sheep thing going on with the brothers.

SO. Yeah, again, liu is the golden child. while jeff's getting caught bullying kids as young as 7, liu's getting decent grades, has a nice set of friends, is excitedly planning for college, etc. he's not extraordinary by any means, but he's doing good

he's also just like...genuinely a good person, he really really really cares for jeff and sees the good in him. he knows jeff is struggling, he knows jeff lives with heavy guilt and resentment regarding his family, there's always that unspoken tension of his father. and liu is jeff's #1 defender, even when jeff genuinely doesn't deserve it

HOWEVER. i dont think 'glass child' is the right term for their situation specifically, but something along those lines. liu IS incredibly overlooked because of how much jeff acts out. and even when he IS acknowledged for his good, it seems to always be an intentional attack on jeff. "liu's so smart, why can't you be like that?" "you're so reckless, have you ever seen liu do something that stupid before?" "go ask your brother for help, he knows better" . . . which impacts jeff more, obviously, but it still leaves liu with a lot of guilt, shame, anxiety, self esteem issues, cuz why is he only good in comparison? why isn't he good on his own? then he feels guilty for feeling guilty cuz at least he's not in jeffs shoes. he just feels like hes got a lotta mundane issues. at least they're not jeffs, right ?

Anyway. He was prepping for college but when he took the fall for Jeff attacking Randy, it fucked up his university acceptance and he just went to a local community college to try and build some credits and a GPA and resume. I’m. It’s 12am I’m. Anything after this is just me rambling don’t take it seriously ever at all

Trying so hard to finish this draft I’m so tired um. I’m not sure if he goes to college before or after Jeff’s first rampage n I’m too lazy to check.

Regardless, he ends up transferring, getting some sort of vague business degree, and getting a very mundane office job. Probably ran errands for a long time, getting coffee and whatnot. Felt very…. Lost? All things considered

Anyhow. Somewhere in this he starts dating some guy and they fall in love and whatnot and lius healing and he assumes Jeff’s dead cuz how te hell is he still alive . None of Jeff’s ‘famous murders’ are around (aka the smiles and go to sleep written on walls) so he thinks he’s done.

And then the Arkensaw case happens.

Liu spirals. Ruins everything. He gets so anxious and paranoid and depressed he ends up losing his job. Hes planning ways to go to Alabama, where the Arkensaw case happened

Fiance is like heeeeellll nooooo im not going to Alabama wtf r u on. Liu is like well I’m going regardless. Fisnce is like if you go I’m calling off the wedding. Liu is so hurt it just pushes him further

By time he ends up in Alabama he realizes he’s right back at the bottom of the corporate ladder, lost tons of savings, and doesn’t even wanna find Jeff anymore. Just wants to move on . Can’t afford to move again

[depressopax]

NSFW Alphabet

For Andrés de Fonollosa/Berlin

Fandom - La casa de papel/Money Heist

The complete NSFW alphabet for Berlin, based on my LCDP Alphabet.

Pairing: Berlin x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut/headcanons Warning(s): Sexual content. MDNI! Light BDSM, worship, praise and degradation, oral sex, mention of choking kink. Possessiveness & jealousy. Switch!Berlin. Reader is gender neutral! Words: 2.1K Summary: The NSFW alphabet, A-Z, for Andrés de Fonollosa English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3

|| AO3 link || Masterlist || Request ||

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Berlin may have two moods when having sex: - Slow and loving - Fast and hard

However, his aftercare is always the same.

As we know, Berlin is like a totally different person when he’s in love.

You realize so by how sweet he is with you during intimate times.

Whether he’s submissive or dominant in bed (he can do both 😽), he wants you to feel loved afterwards.

But he does enjoy being a tease too lmao

He’ll tell you how good you were, how much he enjoyed it and how amazing you look etc

…But Berlin also likes teasing you for your reactions, how “needy” you were, or simply brag about how amazing he is 

Being an asshole aside…

After being reassured you’re ok, he helps you clean up

Gives you something to drink and offers you a bath or shower (he won’t let you do it alone tho)

Berlin worships you and your body, sexually or not. He just adores you.

But honestly? He is pretty lazy after sex.

He prefers to cuddle you whilst whispering praise to you

Sex makes him sleepy lmao

Besides, his favorite thing to do is have deep conversations with his lover, and have you resting on him naked.

He falls asleep pretty quick, and does so whilst spooning you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On himself: Hands and neck

He loves how his hands look, especially when they’re on your body and inside of you

…Or around your throat

He likes his neck, and the way your lips feel on it, especially when you leave hickeys on it ;)

It turns him on to see the bruises and marks you leave on him, and doesn’t give A FUCK if people see it - he wants everyone to know he is taken ;)

On you: Your eyes… And ass.

He loves eye contact during sex. 

It says everything to him - if you like what he’s doing, when you’re close, etc… 

It’s also really intimate to look into your eyes whilst pounding into you. 

He adores you, especially those eyes of yours.

Ass too, of course.

He likes the way it feels against his palms, how it looks with AND without clothes… 

Also loves spanking it

…And the sounds of his balls slapping against your ass when he takes you from behind.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Making you cum is his favorite activity.

He likes seeing how many times he can make you cum before you break completely.

The sounds you make, the way your body twitches and squirms, and how your eyes roll back when climaxing… He loves it all. 

He’s not scared to get messy. Berlin likes it when you cum on his fingers, cock, or face. Anything. 

Of course, he likes cumming on you, too.

Not a fan of releasing inside of you, tho. 

When you suck him off, he likes to come in your throat, or pull out and release all over your face.

It makes him feel possessive, seeing you all flustered and covered in his cum- 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He likes the idea of blindfolding you, often using his own ties or putting satin blindfolds over your eyes.

Knowing you’re completely at his mercy excites him.

He’ll get the chance to use whips on you, tease your skin with feathers and make you shiver with his touch.

…This way, he can tease you too. 

Probably cruel and doesn’t touch you, have you on edge and begging for it.

Only to give you the pleasure needed when you least expect it. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Homeboys have four ex-wives… That’s all I’ll say. 

He knows how to pleasure you, and also knows what he likes in bed.

Very attentive and catches up on what you like and dislike in bed.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Doggy style. 

He loves having you on all fours, grabbing your hips and thrusting into you.

The position gives him the opportunity to take you on other places besides the bed.

The kitchen counters, against a table, the shower wall…. You name it. 

This man is creative af lmao

He’s an ass guy, how can he not love doggy?

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He can be very serious if you want him too, or if he’s in a bad mood.

But most of the time, he’ll be humorous.

He wants sex to be intimate and passionate

But also want you to have a good time and feel good about yourself.

He tends to be rough, so when your whimpers get too loud, he’ll crack a joke to make you focus on something else. 

His goal is to make you relaxed, satisfied but also to at least smile at something stupid he says.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He doesn’t shave, doesn’t see the point in it.

Body hair is natural to him, and he’s proud of it, too.

But he does keep it trimmed, so it doesn’t get in the way.

He’s kind of a perfectionist, you know?

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Like I said on G: He’s intimate and passionate!

If you ask Berlin, sex is supposed to be just that.

He always makes sure it’s romantic

And if he needs to be cheesy with music, lighted candles and such… He’ll do it. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

To be honest? He does it alot.

BUT… He’d never admit it.

He probably talks about it like masturbation is “lame” or even “disgusting” 

…Yet, he touched himself a lot. 

When single, he uses it as a stress relief.

Before you and him became official, he used to jerk off to thoughts off you.

Even when in a relationship, Berlin masturbates with you on his mind. Or maybe whilst looking at pictures of you.

He’s not a fan of porn, finds it repulsing to watch other people have sex

He instead uses his own imagination, and… Well, you - photos, and even something that smells like you - to get off. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Bondage

Impact play

Dom/sub & discipline

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The bed, the couch, against the kitchen counter/table…

Prefers a bit privacy

So anywhere at home where he can bend you over will do it

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Simply… You.

And his own fantasies.

Just imagining what he wants to do with you

Or what he wants YOU to do to him, gets him going.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Threesomes and cuckolding

Anything that has to do with sharing you

Seriously, he’ll get seriously offended if you suggest it 😭

Doesn’t like humiliation, neither on you or him

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Homeboy passionate AF

He adores and worships every single inch of you, so ofc he gives you a lot of attention… Down there ;)

He can spend hours giving you oral pleasure

Not only to satisfy you, but because he genuinely gets turned on from going down on someone. It brings him pleasure too

He loves receiving too

Will have you on your knees, loving the sight of you so submissive and eager to please him

Pushing into your warm mouth, rewarding you with praise and LOUD grunts and moans

He hates being the guy to fuck your face

…But if he gets too into it/eager? He’ll do it and not even feel sorry afterwards

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He likes both but prefers fast - but not necessarily rough. 

He wants it to feel intense and have you plead for more. 

He’s more of a “fast and passionate” kinda guy. 

Going slow only makes him frustrated. He wants the both of you to feel the intensity.

He saves the slow “love-making” for special occasions. 

If he’s frustrated or angry he tends to be rough tho - often without realizing so. 

He’ll slam into you mercilessly, only realizing how rough he is when you whimper underneath him

And he likes teasing you for it. “Aww… Is this too much for you, mi amor?”

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

LOVES quickies!!

What’s there not to like about taking you anywhere, at any time?

He’ll have you bent over a table, pressed against a wall and hit it from behind whenever he feels like it. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He likes it risky ;)

Doing it in public for example

Or testing his pull out game

He’ll have you sweating as he tells you how close he is - but still doesn’t pull out… 

And then, before exploding he’ll pull out and release onto your ass or stomach - he’ll be a smug mf about it too

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can go at it for quite a while. He’ll make sure you’re both satisfied

…But he’s insatiable, so it takes a while

He’s a horny bitch lol, so getting ready to take you once again after an orgasm doesn’t take that long.

He can last pretty long, tho. Totally depends on position etc

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I feel like he either has some toys, or that he’s the guy that doesn’t own toys and refuses to use them on his partner, since “he’s better than some stupid toy” 

The toys he has are some vibrators, handcuffs, blindfolds etc… Maybe a whip too, who knows? 

…Bonus point if you switch it up and use them on him

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

UNFAIRRRRRR AF

Will have you on your knees in the end, only because “it’s funny” to see you beg. 💀

He likes turning you on and leave you begging for more

But he won't give it to you that easily…

He also loves making you flustered - you blushing is the cutest thing to him. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He is LOUD and without shame

Grunts, growls, moans

Cuss words, praise, degradation… You name it.

He talks shit in the show, and so he does in the bedroom LMAO

…And whimpers, too - if you fuck him good enough…

He likes dirty talking too.

He actually doesn’t mind if the neighbors hear his moans, combined with the sounds leaving your mouth - he wants everyone to know he’s yours, and that you’re his. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Berlin wears suits a lot, right?

To look good and to fit his “fancy” vibes, yes.

BUT…

His suits come in handy other times, too… 

Especially the tie. 

Just pull it a bit when kissing him.

Heck, he even likes it when you pull it too hard, causing him to gasp for air. 

OR… If you use the tie to handcuff him, or blindfold him with it. EVEN USE IT AS A GAG.

The possibilities are endless. You choose - he’s happy with anything ;)

Yup, “he likes it rough”

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He wears boxers, of course.

However… 

When with you, he sometimes skips the underwears.

That way, it’s easier to have you whenever he wants. 

If we’re discussing what’s under those boxers, tho?

He’s an average size, but slightly thicker. 

Lot of visible veins across his length.

Aight, I’m sorry - I’ll show myself out 🚪🚶

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Bro is horny as hell 💀

Wakes up with a boner, and can’t go to sleep at night before a quickie with you. 

He may be a bit “older” but don’t let that trick you.

He has a hot partner like you, ofc his sex drive is high ;)

He wants to be able to satisfy your needs, always. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Depends. 

Sometime he basically falls asleep minutes after finishing

And he feels guilty af about it later LMAO

So he tries to stay up with you, prioritizing aftercare before sleep.

He absolutely adores you, and seeing you asleep next to him is one of his favorite things.

Knowing that he’s the reason you’re so exhausted makes him want to pamper you with love and affection

But he’s pretty tired, too. So he either falls asleep with you, or as soon as he sees you asleep.

ANDDD that's a wrap for Berlin!!! Hope you guys liked it! <3 Next up - Denver or Tokyo!

[berry-hwa]

Things voltage inc love interests would have to deal with if they chose to date me for some reason (bc I'm bored and procrastinating)

I've thought about writing this for a while since i've noticed these habits of mine lately and have thought about my future partner dealing with them, but since i have no hope of a future partner rn i decided to settle for otome love interests (some not love interests at all heh...i'd gladly take many side chrs especially the women) and i thought it would also be a fun way of getting to know who i am behind the screen! This might be a two parter if i remember any more weird habits i have, but for now, enjoy this self indulgence as always

- My unimaginable ability to be an introvert all. The. Time. I barely leave the house and prefer to be in the comfort of my own space at all times, so spontaneous dates or anything of the sort that isn't planned at least a day or two in advance, i am being a whiny bitch about

- I'm an artist. I plan to be a fulltime artist/freelancer, so again, i spend most of my time at home either doomscrolling or messaging my friends which keeps me away from drawing most of the time. I also deal with art block a LOT and i have a hard time focusing in general, so sometimes i come off as being a lazy bum when in reality i literally cannot will my body to do what i have to do and i need my environment to be the least condescending and judgemental as possible

- Picky. Eater. I literally do not eat ANYTHING. I circle around the same foods ALL THE TIME, and getting me to try something is literally like pushing a boulder up a mountain. This doesn't bother me since i know my wants and needs and im very assertive in keeping my boundaries, so the love interest better not be bothered by it either🎀

- We're sitting at the dinner table with the love interests friends, everyone's eating a variety of different foods and talking and i'm eating french fries and bread

- My hyperfixations and rants. Once i dive into something, i dive IN, and at some point i WILL start yapping about it to everyone that lets me yap, even as the yapping turns into complaining because of how many things i wanna do but never find the time or motivation to even begin. Boy do i wish the love interest is rich so they could entertain my hyperfixations and get me whatever i wanted💔

- I doomscroll or am kept up by said hyperfixations for up to 4AM almost every single night. So I get up anywhere around 12 to 2PM most days

- I am DEAD on my period. I'm basically invisible for 5 days because i can barely move and do anything for myself for those 5 days

- Speaking of periods and hormones, i can get horrible mood swings and get upset and pissy about the smallest of things. I usually don't get argumentative when that happens and since i've already voiced my annoyance, i just wait it out and spend the whole day being passive aggressive and pouty so i can slowly get over the anger without making a scene and getting too emotional and crying

- Social cues are a mystery to me

- If we're eating out or going anywhere where we're serviced, the love interest WILL be doing all the talking for me because i WILL stumble over my words and make a fool of myself

- I don't have the pleasure to yap about my ocs to many people i love, so i WILL yap about my characters and everything about my favorite ships with the love interest. They WILL understand my obsession

- I love chocolate. And peanuts. I am very possessive of chocolate and peanuts that are specifically meant for my consumption. There WILL be bloodshed if they ever think to eat my shit without asking me first

- When i get sick, my entire life becomes miserable. I'm coughing and blowing my nose all day, throat is sore and i likely have a fever. Basically they have to deal with a dead body once again and be nurturing and patient with my miserable ass (and not complain about the evergrowing pile of tissues next to me) ALSO i have major nose problems like. Every single day. I'm sniffling all day and blowing my nose even when i'm not sick. Because of this i constantly toss and turn in bed before i'm able to fall asleep

- My body temperature rises at the speed of light sometimes, so unless it's freezing fucking cold and we can only warm each other up by cuddling to sleep, no love interest is ever spooning me for more than 10 minutes. I could spoon them tho, since i always need to hug something to fall asleep :3

- Speaking of, the cat toy i've been sleeping with for 7 years is not leaving my bed even if i'm 30 years old. If i don't cuddle with the love interest, i'm cuddling my precious pink kitty

- Hahaaaaa no kids. Ever. I think that's self explanatory

- But to dive deeper into it, i did use to want kids when i was younger and saw how every woman i knew had kids. Little me just thought life was gonna be like "find boyfriend, have wedding, have kids" but older me is wiser and more responsible!!(and less straight lmfao) Since i want to be a fulltime artist (it's what i love to do and what i've wanted to do my entire life) i am not giving that up to go through raising a child, much less going through PREGNANCY. I'm overwhmed and overstimulated very easily, so dealing with pregnancy for 9 months and then raising a child for 18+ years is NOT on my radar. I also don't want to go through that and try to balance my work and family life because frankly, i also wouldn't be a great parent! I can barely look after myself! I don't want to have to choose between doing what i love and neglecting my child for hours everyday and wasting away being an exhausted mother who misses who she was before pregnancy. Basically, love interest has to come to terms that i won't have children and won't be coerced into having children if god forbid plan b went wrong lmfao

- If i'm cleaning, we're BOTH cleaning the house together

- Honestly we're doing EVERYTHING together. If i love them to the point i wanna spend my whole life with them, i am dragging them into everything with me that i don't want to do alone

- They cannot carry my ass over their shoulder or carry my ass at all (looking at you bitchsuke ichinomiya) Half of them will actually buckle and both of us would fall on our asses

[mhsdatgo]

I feel like a lot of people misunderstand me when I say I'm disappointed with the way Aegon was adapted.

Most of those who criticize me (and some Aegon stans who aren't apologists, because get some help seriously) throw every possible excuse there is in the book in order to rid Aegon of any kind of depth or potential for Season 2.

I've been told I can't stomach characters that are downright bad, I've been told I only cling to show!Aegon's only redeeming quality at the moment (namely, TGC) and make it THE reason why Aegon should be liked.

I really don't know why I gotta say this about myself as a preface in order to debunk that second "theory" but I can absolutely assure you that amongst all the people I've crushed on or fell in love with in all my years of life, only two of them were boys and one of them is my current boyfriend. So if anything my fuckable meter as moral compass doesn't work that well with men lmao. Thank you for admitting that this show is so bad that sometimes the only good quality about certain characters are the actors that play them, idk what to tell you.

And on not being able to handle wicked characters, really? I've got a whole blog shitting on HotD writers for a lot of reasons amongst which is the fact that they made Rhaenyra blander than unseasoned potatoes and you came to the conclusion that... I can't handle wicked characters?

I'd really have no problems with Aegon being adapted as the cruel piece of shit he is in the books. You know, the only source material. If we're talking Aegon individually, my only problem with the route they're taking is making it similar to Joffrey. We don't want Joffrey Targaryen, we want Aegon II. (And like it or not, he's so different from Joffrey it's not even funny) The only things these two kids have in common are dying from poison, having a mother who's a lady-turned-queen, having a grandfather who's hand of the king and being selfish pricks.

My problem lies with Rhaenyra. Everyone knows Aegon sucks ass, that was known even before Sara Hess came up with that caricature of cartoonish evilness and tried masking it as gray writing. It's wanting to make Rhaenyra any better that is ridiculous as fuck.

Rhaenyra was just as selfish, self-righteous and dumb as Aegon. Rhaenyra's motives were just as valid as Aegon. They are both sides of the same coin. That's the basics if you want to understand Fire and Blood. Something Sara, Ryan, Miguel and the entire team didn't understand in the slightest. If you want me to take a show about the Dance of the Dragons seriously, you want to make this SIMPLE concept clear as day, which really isn't that hard.

And I'm sorry, but the situation with Dyana, that poor thing, is always angering to watch. Despicable, yes. Unforgivable, yes. I agree. I like it when there are turns in the adaptation of a story as vague as Fire and Blood, but not when that change is made for no reason other than wanting to uplift a character who deserves anything but.

Furthermore, I beg your pardon a second time for wanting the least possible scenes of r*pe or implied r*pe on my screen. Maybe because it's triggering, not necessarily because the r*pist is played by my little meow meow, ever thought of that? If you want your audience to hate a character, put yourself at work. There are so many ways to do that. Taking the easy route (because it was an easy route, argue with the wall) because war crimes aren't enough to make people pounce at a character like rabid dogs is lazy and disrespectful to people who came to see a well developed show. First accept that there aren't saints in F&B, then you can start working.

[g4y-th0ughts]

Lisa did feel OOC to me as well but honestly I hated this episode because everything felt so exaggerated and silly, whereas usually there’s a coherent thread even with soapiness of it all. Like it felt like they were in inserting Carla and Lisa randomly into the story rather than organically creating a story with them in mind? The whole standing Carla up thing too like what? Wasn’t she the one who brought up moving in? I get it if she got cold feet but it seemed more like she didn’t even recall her own idea lol. I’ve been doing a rewatch of them from Nov to now and Lisa has gotten a lot more rough around the edges and harsh. Which isn’t bad in an of itself but the writing is so lazy sometimes that it’s a bit of whiplash to keep up. Maybe the therapy episode (because I doubt it’ll be a lingering storyline) will help her have some self actualization. Because how she’s moving now is a lot. I had to rewind through the arrest scene because with was terrible although at least she knew she was in the wrong. But goodness if that wasn’t a perfect example that no one should have that kind of unfettered power then idk what is.

anon, that arrest scene enraged me tbh i still haven’t gotten over it because she was obviously going through some sort of police power trip fueled by grief and it was insane to watch. she deserved to be suspended 100%

i think they do have some sort of idea of where they want to take them but it’s executed….. weirdly. my issue with these past episodes is that the writing for them and for lisa especially feels so inconsistent. like, i’m all for a mental health crisis storyline (should’ve happened way earlier given how much baggage she carries) but let’s do it with some sort of logic. cause why am i watching her standing up carla at the house viewing if two days ago she was the one looking for one. she’s struggling with becky’s cold case, i get that, so why wasn’t she struggling two days ago? it’s one step forward and three steps back on the same issue, it feels like week after week we’re watching the same storyline just with a different frame.

and i agree, i feel lisa is being written differently now compared to the beginning of the relationship, especially with carla. and i can get behind the fact that a lot of shit has happened to her since then, i can get behind her being more open about her struggles with carla but give me some consistency. sometimes it just feels like she wakes up in a mood and takes it out on carla (and we know it’s not like that but the undercurrent mental health storyline is done sloppily so it kinda looks like that). let’s hope counseling helps her for real !

and so sorry for the long ass reply lol

[taffycandyqt]

heyyy again, can i request the rise turtles reacting to reader deciding they want to pierce them-selfs but too lazy to go get them professionally done so they just walk in on the reader half-way piercing them-selfs and freak out cuz they just have a needle in them and reader is laughing their ass off at their face.

(the piercing can be anywhere an there face)

remember to drink lots of water as well and take care of yourself <3

Your literally so sweet! Thank you! <3 and right back at you, take good care!

Also I got to like the middle of Mikey's and then Tumblr deleted the whole thing so I just kinda🥲

TW: Mentions of blood (nothing gross), mentions of needles and needles piercing skin

Notes: GN reader

You decided that getting piercings was too much effort and too expensive. So why not do it yourself?

Raph:

*PANIC*

Boi is the epitome of terrified

And look, he knows piercings are a thing and that people get them but like he isn't surrounded by many people with them and he always thought it was supposed to be done professionally.

So, safe to say when he comes to your place to hang and finds you in the bathroom with blood dripping from your ear and a needle in it, broski SCREECHED.

Legit worried someone straight up tried to stabb you with a needle.

Tonight was the night! You finally decided to suck it up and get that double piercing you've always wanted. However, you were poor.

So! DIY it is! People do it all the time so it couldn't be that hard right?

Wrong.

At least you think so. You didn't really do any research before hand so you aren't 100% sure the bleeding is bad. But at the same time you don't think bleeding is normal in this kind of situation. Or at least not the desired result.

Admist the chaos of you trying to control the bleeding Raph texts you that he dropped by for a short visit. You figured that the calming presence of your boyfriend would help lift you mood and keep you from freaking out. So after telling him where to find you, you sat down on the toilet lid to actually search up how to to pierce yourself. (And if bleeding is normal). However before you could get to any useful information you hear the surprised screech of your boyfriend.

"OH MI GOSH! ARE YOU OKAY??!"

"Oh, Raph this is jus-"

"WOW thatsalotofblood...COTTON BALLS! or gauze?? You have those right? How did this happen?? WAIT! We need to remove the needle first! Did someone do this to you??? Was it an accident? How do you accidental-"

"PFFFFFFFTTT! HAHAHehehehehe!" You practically cackled.

"w- ... what ...?" Raph said, no less panicked, just a little more confused.

"Raph. Sweetheart, hehe," you couldn't help but giggle. "Love of my life, I'm fine, I'm just piercing my ears."

"Oh. So the bleeding is normal then?"

"Oh, no. I'm pretty sure that's a bad thing."

"TAKE THE NEEDLE OUT!"

Mikey:

You cannot tell me this boy has not thought about getting piercings before.

They're just so pretty and cool, and he is all for them! (Low-key upset he doesn't have ears because of all the cool ear piercings out there)

Even with that though, when you show up with needles sticking out of each side of you bottom lip, bro is a little scared.

Like wtf are you doing??

When you tell him though, he is HAPPY to help.

He will even get a piercing with you!

Splinter will make him take it out later buuuuuut, it's about the couple bondinggg!!

On a high of boredom and internet envy (a.k.a, seeing tons of pics of hot ppl with snake bite piercings) you began to prepare needles to give yourself some dope piercings. After expertly pushing the needles through both ends of your bottom lip you were reminded of your 'bi-weekly mandatory art and cuddle couple bonding date' (Mikey's name for it). You couldn't just take the needles out so after some thought you just decided, screw it, it's not like I'm bleeding. It hurt a little though.

After slipping under the man hole cover and navigating the nasty sewer you made it to the lair. Voicing a quick hello to Splinter as you passed through he living room he met you with a swift wave, still thoroughly invested in his l show.

Making your way to Mikey's room you speak a quick 'knock knock' to get his attention, seeing as you couldn't really knock on a curtain. As the turtle of the hour excitedly pushed open the curtain he was more than a little surprised upon seeing you.

"EEP!"

*WHEEZE!*

You couldn't help it okay?? You didn't know what reaction you were expecting from him but it definitely wasn't 'EEP!'. Eventually you both calmed down enough to talk.

"Angle, what did you do?"

"I'm getting snake bites! Did it myself, what do you think??"

"That's so COOL! Can I get a piercing too!!?"

"I'm pretty sure that's up to your dad hun."

"He'll be fineeeeeee! Come on! This can be the art portion of the 'art and cuddle' date.

Later:

"ORANGE!" Splinter yelled. "I DON'T CARE IF THIS IS SOME FORM OF TEENAGE REBELLION, TAKE THAT OUT NOW OR I'LL DO IT MYSELF!"

"But daaaaaaad!"

Leo:

If you thought Raph's screeching was bad, Leo's is worse.

My guy just wanted to see you and just so happens to portal to you right as the needle goes STRAIGHT through your septum.

When he sees this he FREAKS TF OUT then slips and eats bathroom tile right after.

You'll laugh but he will be so shook

Like he saw the needle GO THROUGH YOU!

Mans is high-key traumatized.

It doesn't help that he probably forgot that piercings were a thing and is just like, wth would you put a needle in YOUR FACE.

When you tell him you're just getting a piercing he will get pouty about you laughing at him (and embarrassed that that wasn't his first thought) and you'll basically have to baby him the rest of the time he's there.

"Oh y/nnnnn-"

*Pinch*

Needle successfully through the septum.

"EEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAH- OOF!"

"HOLY! LEO! WTF you scared the crap out of me! Are you okay?!"

"Wha- eeh- THERES A NEEDLE IN YOUR NOSE!" He yelled pointing a finger at your face.

"Sksksksksk," you snickered. "Yeah, Leo, I put it there."

You had always wanted a septum piercing, but you just couldn't bring yourself to actually go and get it done so you figured the only way to get it is to do it yourself. Your just lucky Leo scared you after it was through rather than before, who knows the kind of bloody nose you would have gotten.

"WHY?!"

"Uuuh, cuz septum piercings are cool?"

"..."

"So how'd the floor taste bud?"

"I-! Hey! Why don't you try seeing someone STAB a NEEDLE through there face. I SAW I GO THROUGH!" He gestured dramatically before folding his arms and facing away from you.

"Awww, come on now handsome. Don't be like that. Tell you what, why don't we make some hot coco and we can watch whatever movie you want"

"Mmmhmmhmhm" he grumped but complied as you led him to the kitchen.

He clung to you the rest of the evening and consistently snuggled his face into your neck during the movie.

Donnie:

Low-key grossed out by the idea of a needle going through someone.

Even more grossed out that you decided to #1. Do it yourself, and #2. Pierce your tongue.

Just, ewww.

But then you had the GALL to ask him if he could help you and he's just like, with what??

I'm not touching your tongue and I am sure not stabbing it with a needle, so what do you want from me??

Will tell you about the multitude of mouth infections you could get from a tongue piercing

Will be there the entire time to make sure you don't hurt yourself, though he has to look away when you actually put the needle through.

Again, ew.

Even though he finds the whole idea gross, he will admit that when all was said and done, it looked good on you.

Your probably the only person he thinks looks good with one.

"I'm sure Mikey would be more than happy to help you."

"No Donnie! I asked YOU cuz I want YOUR help!"

You told Donnie all the time how you wanted a tongue piercing. You were just to lazy to get it done professionally and frankly, you don't want a stranger prodding your mouth. When you realized you could do it yourself, you were so excited. Donnie helping you would just make it all that much better!

"Y/n, while I am happy to assist you in any matter and am glad you came to me for such, I'm afraid I cannot help you in this matter."

"Why not? Your smart, with your help my piercing will be perfect!"

"Dearest. You are correct, I am smart. However, I am a man if science and my talents lie outside the realm of bodily piercings. Besides, are you aware of the sheer amount of infections a piercing give you? Mouth piercings especially cause quite grotesque infections, and that's not even to mention the damage it can cause to your teeth."

"Awwww." You sighed in disappointment.

"..."

"Though... I suppose nothing stops me from making sure you follow the instructions correctly."

"YAAAY!"

-a couple minutes later-

"Okay, dear, let's go over one more time. Gauze?"

"Yes!" You replied.

"Needle?"

"Yup!"

"Piercing?"

"Yeppers!"

Donnie looked at you for a moment and raised an eyebrow at that response, but kept going regardless.

"Lighter and ice cubes?"

"Yeppiroo!"

"Okay. The first step is to heat the needle."

After carefully going through the instructions you finally got your long awaited tongue piercing! However Donnie didn't think you had started to pierce your tongue and saw you with a needle halfway through your tongue before looking away and gaging, which you couldn't help but laugh at. That was until Donnie told you to stop before you hurt yourself. Overall, he did make the whole experience, so much better.

------------------------------------------------------------

I hope that was good! Sorry if there are any inaccuracies. I am literally going off of what I saw in the parent trap soooooo. Yeah. There's my first fic.

Imma go to bed now🥱😵

[hislittleraincloud]

So let me get this straight, for you Enid would be a better sexual partner for Donovan than Weems?

Holy God that sucks… I hope at least in your fanfiction Wednesday is over 20 years old when you have her screwing a man over 50 otherwise there is a problem

You're new here, aren't you.

1. Enid would be fun and interesting to explore. It's different, and finding the path towards them can be teased out from canon if you try (him saving her, her saving him from Hyde Tyler). I even have a short and somewhat tender platonic Enovan scene upcoming in the final chapter of Afterburn.

You can think the ship sucks all you want. I don't give a fuck. I'll pair Wednesday or any of the characters with anyone, and I don't give a goddamn flying fuck what you think. Why? Because you can do the same, and I won't give a shit (I might question or dislike the pairing and critique your writing Wyler, Wenclair, but I'll still defend your right to write it).

2. As for this

I hope at least in your fanfiction Wednesday is over 20 years old when you have her screwing a man over 50 otherwise there is a problem

You can have your problem and cry all you want about it then, because you're a lazy Karen who didn't do her due diligence and just GLANCE at the fucking pinned post I've had up there since the summer of 2023. They have a 39 year age difference.

Satisfying Afterburn is canon compliant. It's designed to slip into canon without disturbance. At this point in the story she is 16, but she was 15 in the flashback with Mr. Fortunato, who was in his late 40s.

Afterburn Wednesday has two behavioral qualities [that she did not express in Netflix canon] when combined makes her unique in the fandom: She's a (functional) stoner and sex obsessed (like her parents). I suppose her self-harm is also an added quality I gave her. She is not your 'Wednesday', and she doesn't have to be.-

Afterburn Donovan/Sheriff Galpin was never in pursuit of her, even though he found her magnetic/charming. Once again, you didn't do your fucking due diligence. It was all AB Wednesday

The Nightshades all fuck each other too, and there are/will be forthcoming stories of actual sexual abuse in there as well (and I'm reminded of Wednesday's attempted rape, but that was a Deleted Scene). People will find SOMETHING sexually disturbing in it, I guarantee you (I mean, unless literal shit eating is your thing). But none of it is intended to be a didactic treatise on fucking old men or fucking underage teens. People of sound minds understand this about erotic fiction/smut, and understand that the relationship is not to be emulated out here in the real world.

Why the fuck do I have to tell this to you? Do you lack common sense?

You sound like this charmer, whose post I've had in my drafts because I wanted to stew on it before I reblogged it but I've decided to just screen it because that shit doesn't deserve a reblog and this is the perfect time to address it:

Not me (screencap for those w/dark mode)⤵️

Clearly this fuckhead⤴️ does not understand fiction and wants to compel other Weemsday people not to fantasize about student-teacher relationships when it is a HUGE FUCKING TROPE (so goddamn huge that Jenna goddamn Wednesday Ortega starred in a whole ass movie about it). And to that I have to tell this author to fuck the fuck off, and once they've fucked off, they can fuck back on to fuck off again with a goddamn fuck yourself boomerang.

I have always, always been anti-censorship in the arts and sciences. I was born into it; my father was/is a polymath scientist/artist/writer/carpenter who immersed himself in banned books and world erotica when he was young. (BTW, my Dad also had a big collection of Henry Miller's books, which I guess might be another reason I'm kind of stuck on Miller's Girl. I'd read Miller when I was younger than Cairo Sweet.) I learned the value of artistic freedom of expression early in life (by the age of 5), and carried that with me through high school when they tried to censor me there as well (for writing a lesbian-themed poem; I was also featured in my state's big name newspaper for my anti-censorship dissent when a sex educator came to visit our high school and some parents got upset over that). I never took being censored in the arts lying down, especially when it came to my own sexual expression as a youth. And yes, I had sexual expression very young, I've been writing smut since the second grade. My followers know this, or should.

My father isn't perfect, but he introduced me to some of the greats who utilized the English language to entertain and sometimes horrify, particularly to the ones whoses voices some shitbag somewhere tried to silence. (I was taken to meet Allen Ginsberg when I was 14, then a few years later I met with him again at my university. ...Damn, that was 30 years ago now. I'm fucking old.)

You're one of those types though, aren'tcha? A moralizing shitbag type who wants to tell people what to do. Imma tell you what I was going to tell that other moralizing shitbag I capped above: It's called freedom of expression, both creative and sexual. When you bring fantasy closer to our moral reality, you start to lose your grip on reality when considering the fantasy. That's why you're too bothered by the subject matter. You fully believe that our moral codes and rules should apply to a fantasy world where people shapeshift, make things move with their telekinetic powers, and make it possible to fucking resurrect a goddamn 400 year old corpse via black magic.

I'm not sure who it is you think you're protecting here. What is your purpose, in screaming about these underage pairings? Did you think that some fresh-faced 10-year-old is going to read Afterburn and think, "WELL HOT DAMN, I NEED TO GET ME SOME OLD BASTARD COP DICK ✨RIGHT NOW 😭😭😭💖✨!"? Same goes for the Weemser, for scolding the underage teens who write Weemsday. Go get that boomerang.

TLDR for the both of you et al;

Fuck off with the would-be censorship and do not tell others what they can write about.* 🫠🖕🏽

[inspector-montoya-fox]

this post was initially gonna be like a lazy rant about how the Klaww Gang's team dynamics suck ass but the more i wrote the more i realised there's so much to discuss. so today let's discuss how the Klaww Gang's team dynamics suck ass but not on like surface-level y'know?

i'm not even sure if the Klaww Gang qualifies as an actual gang because they barely even acknowledge each other? their interactions are very scarce. off the top of my head we get Rajan's party which they all attend apart from Dimitri (Dimitri attending Rajan's party would be so bizarre btw) and Jean Bison's phone call with Arpeggio. these are things friends do so maybe they should be the Klaww Friends ? i mean they have the sinister-looking conference room but we never see them hold a meeting there. moreover, they all act out of pure self-interest. they each got a Clockwerk part and just went on to do their own thing like counterfeit, drug production, etc. i mean what's even the point of forming a gang if their goal was to just split Clockwerk parts and then disband? did they have any other operations in the works? Arpeggio was planning on double-crossing the rest of the members anyway and he needed them to actually have the parts for his plan to come to fruition but still seems a bit pointless.

interesting question: how exactly did the Cairo Museum heist go down? was it like a group activity or pulled off by a single member? or did Arpeggio have Neyla break in and take them? because i can't imagine the Klaww Gang members coming together like an Ocean's movie to steal a bunch of robot owl parts? in fact, i can't imagine any of them stealing in the traditional like robber kinda way. with the exception of Bison and maybe Arpeggio, they're all shown to have some sort of prestige in their own part of the world: Dimitri was an established artist and nightclub owner and as shown in the comics hanged out with elitist socialites; the Contessa was a high-ranking Interpol officer; Rajan threw a lavish ball with hundreds of guests. like i wouldn't be surprised if the Klaww Gang members had institutional power. maybe they just bribed the museum to give them the parts?

and then there's the fact that they were a complete failure. i can't help but compare them to the Fiendish Five, who, let's admit it, won. they "won" in the sense that they achieved their goal. it's not like anyone stopped them. sure, Sly whooped their ass years later but they still killed ConnEr and split the Thievius Raccoonus. they went on with their lives until Sly grew up. like the first game is very much a revenge story. the Klaww Gang? not so much. the game takes place right after the Cairo Museum heist so all their scheming and plans could only take place for like maybe a couple of months max. and let's not forget they were also tricked by Neyla. flops.

i'm not sure why but i also think the Fiendish Five can evade the criticisms highlighted above even though they were also a bunch of strangers? Clockwerk was a much more menacing boss than Arpeggio (if Arpeggio can even be considered a boss. more like a final member), like i don't think anyone from the Fiendish Five would dare question his plan or motivations. but also, i think there was an underlining sense of camaraderie when each of them warned us about the next one post-bossfight, like at least some respect. i can't say the same for the Klaww Gang, like i can't even imagine the Contessa, Jean Bison and Dimitri interacting with each other (and now i suddenly can't think of anything i need more in my life). Clockwerk feels like the Fiendish Five's employer and he brought them together to pull off something kinda sacred like continuing the cycle of raccoon murders. basically they got together and did a thing and that was it like they just casually went on with their lives after that. Clockwerk was immortal, for all we know and as i have previously theorised there could have been previous iterations of the Fiendish Five throughout history. just baddies recruited by Clockwerk to help him take down the Coopers.

so yea. the Klaww Gang very much sucked ass but !!! i think it was for the better. even if i compared them to the Fiendish Five, i feel like SP wanted to set the expectations by making it seem like we were going to receive something similar just to then have things go down very differently. the Klaww Gang is different because its members (were under the illusion that they) were autonomous. they weren't let in on the big picture (What is this with clocks, bro? Have you no vision?) and they all thought they were the gang's top dog. this made for something very different, especially when you throw Neyla and outlawed Carmelita into the mix. but their team dynamics still sucked ass.

[arttrampbelle]

I feel nrs shits on raiden because ed has a problem with the character personally.

Why? I honestly have no fucking clue.

Raiden isn't that hard to understand so im not understanding the big deal.

We can have him go dark but not liu? Oh yes because he's the special one. I forgot. 🙄😒😑

Everyone else can get at least something that makes them feel believable,even likable and flawed.

Oh but heaven forbid liu kang fucks up.

See this is why hc liu is better. Non god liu kang is better.

But back to raiden.

Why is it. Why is it. Whenever raiden makes a reasonable mistake,that anyone can make.You guys take it so hard?

And villainize him.

But if liu makes a mistake its the end of the world but never do the same. Like all is forgiven and forgotten. Emphasis on the forgotten part. 🙄

If any other characters do reasonably fucked up shit. And have decent character flaws. You guys dont bat an eye.

But raidne does it. Suddenly you shit on him.

He cant win no matter what he does,how you write him. Im starting to think you guys hate raiden because you have unresolved daddy issues,authority issues,or you hate to admit that a godly powerful being cant wipe you ass all the time and you *sarcastic shock!* might actually have to solve the problems yourselves?! Wow what a concept.

Like srsly tho. Raiden isn't infallible. But he isn't a fucking chump loser can't get shit done.

He could get shit done but he has a code of honor,rules he has to follow by(that he hates),he has so much on his plate. And honestly you guys never appreciated his character.

Like out of pure spite. Im gonna do raiden self indulgent stuff today. Just to spite people.

Legit half the crap we got in 12. We could have gotten with raiden if you guys at nrs bothered to fucking write him properly. Instead of being lazy selfish pricks with a bias and favoritism towards other characters. *couch liu kang cough* (like i love liu but not written like that,never like that. God liu? Gross. Humble monk warrior liu? Yes)

Because liu kang playing "savior and creator of everything" is disturbing,disgusting,and disrespectful.

Like srsly they are legit telling THE SAME FUCKING STORY AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN. SAME AS 11. SAME SHIT. oh but because its uwu brand liu kang. And not the real liu kang. Suddenly its ok?! No!

Legit mk12....os the same fucking thing. Just liu kang brand.

It's no exciting. Its not new. You guys are lying to yourselves.

We could have had any fucking god charactera in mk do the same shit. And get the same result.

You guys could have had this with raiden. But noooooooo. You wanna shit on a character for shock value and no reason. Gtfoh.

You could have actually done something worth a damn but nope. You only care about gimmicks and whatever carries your attention spans for five secs for a quick fix of serotonin because you can't fucking get thru your heads you are being manipulated by a fucking company that lost passion years ago.

But that's besides the point.

So yeah. Raiden.

I'm so sorry they never gave you the love they should have.

Tobias should sue for your trauma. (Half joking here people. Tobias was the one who created and came up with the idea for raiden in the first place. And layed many foundations for this game but is half heartedly given credit while boon steals (no pun intended) his thunder)

Raiden i am so sorry for your mistreatment.

*hugs him*

Srsly if you call yourself a mortal kombat fan. And you genuinely hate raiden Do us all a favor and throw yourself in the dumpster fire. Plz. Also block tf outta me.

Look as a shang tsung tsimp. I love many many other characters too. But raiden is a comfort character,tho i self ship with him too he is comfort character. So i won't tolerate slander and disrespect.

Anyways. Raiden....my thunderdilf.....you deserve sm better.

I hope real raiden fans understand this. And make more PROPER kontent for you. Unlike nrs. We will treat you right.