#Looking at that photo were I'm in the middle of them all awkward and happy and like.

[kyouka-supremacy]

()

[firewasabeast]

The Clarity

The final part of my Meeting the Parents series! You can start from the beginning here, and read the final part below or on ao3. Each part can be read separately, but it makes more sense if you read them all.

They had just made it out of The Gables and onto paved road when Buck couldn't stay silent any longer. He had been staring down at the photo album, listening to Tommy sniff and suck in breaths every now and then. And judging by the fact he was occasionally swerving slightly off the road, it was easy to assume his eyes were blurred with tears.

“Tommy,” he started, his voice soft yet assertive, “you need to pull over.”

Tommy sniffed again. His grip on the wheel tightened. “No, I'm okay.”

There was no way he could drive all the way home like this, and no way that Buck was going to let him. “Tommy,” he repeated. He looked over at him, noted the red-rimmed eyes and his trembling lip. Buck reached out and touched his shoulder, stroking his thumb back and forth over the muscle. “Babe, pull over.”

Buck wasn't sure if it was the touch, or the pet name, but the dam Tommy had been building up burst. He pulled over to the side of the road just as the tears started to fall.

He leaned forward, shoulders shaking. He rested his hands and head against the steering wheel.

The photo album was quickly dropped to the floorboard. Buck unbuckled and raised the center console so he could scoot into the middle seat and wrap himself around Tommy. It was an awkward angle, but one arm wrapped around his waist, while the other rubbed up and down his back. He laid his head against Tommy's shoulder and held him.

They were like that for awhile. Silent except for the occasional gasp of breath from Tommy. Buck didn't try to stop him, didn't try to silence his cries. He just maintained his hold, and wished more than anything he could go back to the Kinard's place and knock Frank out.

It took a few minutes for Tommy's breathing to return to normal. Buck moved away just enough for him to sit up, but kept a hand on his back.

“I don't know why I'm crying,” Tommy admitted, pressing his palms against his eyes. “I'm not even sad, I'm angry.”

“That's understandable. He- He's an easy man to get angry at.”

“I don't even think it's him I'm angry at. It's me.”

Buck's eyebrows furrowed. “You? Why would you be mad at yourself?”

Another wipe of the eyes and Tommy turned to Buck, who looked all kinds of concerned. “I should have known better, Evan,” he said. “I led you in there blind, and I... I should have known better.”

“You told me they were unpredictable.” Buck shrugged. “You weren't wrong.”

“The last few times I've gone, Dad's been mostly silent. Even when mom threw that frying pan at his head, it wasn't because of anything he said, it was because he kept trying to stumble toward her and tickle her. I thought,” he let out a humorless laugh, “I thought if I brought you with me, showed them how good we are together, they'd be happy for me. For us.”

There were so many things Buck wanted to say, but none of them sounded right. None of them would fix anything.

Instead of I'm sorry or you know I love you, right the thing that came out of Buck's mouth was, “Let's get a motel.”

Tommy blinked once, twice, three times at him. “What?”

“Let's get a motel,” he repeated. “We don't have work tomorrow. Let's be spontaneous, drive to the nearest motel, do some sightseeing in the morning.”

“There's not really much to see here.”

“Oh, I'm sure there is. All the crappy motels have those stands with the brochures. We'll close our eyes and pick something.” Buck leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the side of Tommy's mouth before moving back to his seat. “You want me to drive?”

Tommy, still trying to figure out what was happening, stared out the windshield at the vast amount of nothingness around them. “We don't have any stuff.”

“Please, we have emergency bags in both cars. Clothes, toiletries, first aid kits, whatever we need is back there.”

That was true. Seeing as they were both a bit disaster prone, they had started leaving a duffel for each of them in both vehicles. Whether it was a natural disaster, or manmade, they'd be prepared.

Still, Tommy had questions. “Why are we doing this?”

Buck reached out, wrapped his hand around Tommy's wrist, giving him a pleading look. “Does sitting at home for the rest of the afternoon sound intriguing to you? It'll be fun, Tommy. We'll be like cowboys on the run.”

*****

Cowboys on the run turned into a thirty minute drive toward an overpriced stay at a lackluster motel just off the highway named Frederico's Sleep n' More. “I don't even wanna know what the more stands for,” Tommy mumbled when they walked into the room.

Evan had intended to use the restroom and return to Tommy all perky and ready for whatever adventure awaited them in whatever town they were in now. But as soon as he stepped out of the bathroom he was met with Tommy lying on top of the bed, feet dangling off the edge, not asleep but eyes closed. He looked relaxed, which was a relief, but Buck couldn't help the sadness that overcame him at the sight. This man who drove three hours just to help his parents out for the day being treated like garbage. Almost worse actually, because garbage once served a purpose, and it seemed to them that Tommy never did.

Buck walked to the bed, toeing off his shoes before gently letting his body dip beside Tommy.

Tommy, eyes still closed, laid out his arm. A silent ask for Buck to curl up beside him.

He never had to be asked twice.

Once Buck was tucked into Tommy's side, head resting on his chest, Tommy folded his arm over him. The soft scratches up and down his back had Buck closing his own eyes, humming out a sigh of contentment.

“Can I ask you a weird question?” Buck asked. He rested a hand over Tommy's pec, and Tommy brought his free one up to wrap around it.

“Always.”

“Did- When you got hurt, did your mom or dad ever get you things? Like, to try and make you feel better?”

Tommy didn't even have to think about it. “No. My mom would get me a couple things for my birthday and Christmas, usually clothes. And the only thing I remember my dad ever buying me was a football when I was like ten, I think. He got pissed when I accidentally broke our window on a throw, so I didn't mess with it much after that. I did have to do a lot of odd jobs around the neighborhood to earn money for the new window though.”

“Did he...” Buck hesitated, and Tommy squeezed his hand.

“You can ask anything,” Tommy assured him.

“Your mom said he'd hit you sometimes, like when you'd get into trouble. Did he then?”

Tommy stiffened for a moment, and Buck almost regretted asking. “Yeah, he did. The belt was his favorite form of discipline.”

Buck sat up on his elbow so he could look at Tommy. “Even though it was an accident?” He couldn't imagine getting hit as a child, or hitting a child, regardless of whether the act was intentional or incidental.

Tommy squinted his eyes open just enough to see Evan. “Dad always said the best way to never make the same mistake twice was to remember the pain from the first time.”

Buck didn't even know what to say. No matter how distant and neglectful his parents might have been, he was never afraid of them. Never had to worry about being hit. He laid back on the bed, tugging Tommy over to him. They settled into their new positions, Buck with his arms wrapped around Tommy, Tommy with his head on Buck's chest and an arm draped over his waist.

“Do you remember that double wide across the street?” Tommy asked.

“Mhm.”

“Mrs. Thompson lived there when I was growing up. She had three kids, all girls and they were a few years older than me, but she liked me. She'd let me come over and do my homework at her dining room table. Her yard had grass and she'd let me play out back whenever I wanted. And when my dad would get really pissed at me, she'd let me hide out at her place until I saw the light turn off in my parents bedroom. That's how I'd know they were asleep, and I'd sneak back in my own bedroom window.”

“Did you ever get caught?”

“No. I'm sure they knew, but they never bothered to act like they cared. My dad did come to Mrs. Thompson's house a couple times looking for me, but she'd always say she hadn't seen me. She'd also tell him to get off her property because his breath was gonna stink up her whole house." Tommy snorted at the memory.

“She sounds like a good woman.”

“Mhm,” Tommy hummed, “she was. I used to pretend I was her kid. I'd say my name was Tommy Thompson. Thought it sounded better than Kinard. I swore that one day I'd grow up and have a home just like hers. Her girls were always happy, they all laughed together. Her husband worked a lot, but he was nice too. He played guitar and he'd let me sit with his girls and listen while Mrs. Thompson cooked dinner. Their house always smelled so good and clean. I- I wanted that so bad.”

“What happened to them?”

“Mr. Thompson died from a heart attack when I was about thirteen. That was rough, but Mrs. Thompson was so strong through all of it. She died while I was in Iraq; I didn't find out until after I got home. I was devastated. I'm not sure about their daughters.”

“They sounded like wonderful people,” Buck said. “I would have loved to meet them.”

“They would have loved you,” Tommy replied. He was sure of it too. “Anyone with half a brain would love you.”

Buck laughed at that, beginning to run his fingers through Tommy's hair.

The conversation died down there. Tommy never stayed awake very long when his head was getting rubbed. A couple of minutes and he was out like a light.

Buck couldn't sleep though. His heart still ached for Tommy, both present and past.

He was once a boy in desperate need of love. A mom to hug him, a dad to teach him. He didn't get either of those things.

He was a burden. That's all. A burden that neither parent ever really wanted in the first place. A mouth they had to feed, a body they had to clothe, a soul they had to provide for.

He was once a teenager, quiet and reserved. Too smart for his own good. Never congratulated for his accomplishments, never told he'd done a good job. Never guided down a path, but forced in one direction when he didn't make the right choices at seventeen years old.

He was once man who had resigned himself to never having love. Cut himself off to happiness and let anger and hatred bubble up inside of him. Pushed people away because the people he always cared about either didn't care about him or they left him somehow, even if they didn't mean to.

And now he was a man that, despite all of that, held endless love in his own heart. Who Jee called the “best hug giver”, much to Buck's dismay. Who would do anything for his friends, risking his own life without a second thought. Who calmed children at the scene of a four alarm fire when they didn't know if their mom had made it, and stayed with them until they'd all been reunited. Who stayed up all night when Buck was sick with the flu because the only thing that helped his nausea was for his back to be rubbed.

And everything started to make sense. It was clear why Tommy clung to the Buckley's the way he did. Why he was always ready and willing to hop on a helicopter to take Phillip to a game, or make sure Margaret was in town on one specific weekend to go to Carrizo Plain and look at the wildflowers. It made sense that he happily and quickly accepted that the Buckley's were trying, were actually making an effort to be there for their children now, even if was a bit late.

Late was better than never, and Buck had a feeling Tommy's own parents would never be making the effort that his own were.

It didn't make Buck magically forget his own turbulent past with his mom and dad. He'd still feel that twinge of jealousy when they'd laugh a little harder at Tommy's jokes, or listen to his stories a bit more intently. He'd still get a little annoyed at Tommy when he didn't notice.

But he did understand it now, which had been half the battle to begin with.

Carefully, as not to wake Tommy, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and began to do some research.

*****

Nearly two hours passed before Tommy started to stir. He lifted his head, glaring around the room in confusion until he remembered where he was at. He shifted so he could look at Buck, who was smiling at him softly. Buck loved how Tommy looked when he first woke up. His hair a curly mess, a little drool on his lips, eyelashes fluttering with every blink. And that rough voice when he'd first speak.

“Hi.”

Yeah. Just like that.

“Hi yourself. Get some good rest?”

Tommy nodded, pushing himself off of Buck but remaining by his side. “Mhm.” He rubbed his eyes, and did a little yawn as he stretched. “D'you sleep?”

“No. Had too much fun watching you.”

Buck was pleased by the smile that washed over Tommy's face. “M'hungry,” he said, rubbing a hand over his stomach.

Buck laughed. “Go freshen up and we'll find someplace for dinner.”

Tommy leaned over, a bringing his fingers just under Buck's chin, and pulled him in for a kiss.

“Mm,” Buck moaned cheerfully as they parted. “What was that for?”

“Just love you.”

“I love you too.”

With one final kiss, Tommy got up and headed for the bathroom.

Buck took a screenshot of the website he had up on his phone. A reminder for himself to talk to Tommy about it during dinner. During his research, he'd found they were having a tulip festival outside of Los Angeles in a few weeks, and Buck was sure his mom would like to go.

[adventuringblind]

If You Don't Want the Truth, then Don't Ask

Oscar Piastri x Autistic!Reader

Genre: fluff

Request: kinda...? People want more of this content, so who am I to deny them? My requests are open! Please don't hesitate to send me ideas!

Summary: One thing that Oscar loves most about her is that she's always honest. Unfortunately, it seems not everyone has learned that.

Warnings: Media being toxic, the reader gets frustrated at not understanding human behavior

Notes: written in third person

Masterlist

Oscar had fallen in love with her honesty. He never had to guess at her opinions on things or dance around subjects himself.

It was a reprieve from always being coached in media to finally not having to filter himself.

Anyone who had gotten close to her knew one rule she had: if you don't want an honest answer, then don't ask.

She struggles communicating with vocal tones. People often mistake her opinion for being judgemental. It makes her feel unable to speak up for herself. It was never her intention to cause problems. She was just saying her truth.

Emotional communication is even more difficult. She always manages to say the wrong thing. Oscar didn't believe this and felt comforted when she talked him through the truth of the day. But if she was struggling with words and emotions, she opted to communicate via physical touch.

She'd developed a code for human behaviors she didn't quite understand.

When charles was upset about a race, she hugged him. When Oscar was smiling, she kissed his cheek. When Max was being lectured by his father, she stuck her middle finger up at Jos. When Lando couldn't eat his food, she gave him one of her snacks that he also liked.

It became more natural to the grid the more she did these things.

Unfortunately for the fans and the media, they hadn't figured it out. It was ridiculous in everyone's minds how they never learned their lesson.

A picture started circling the internet once of her kissing Lando's cheek after an amazing race. She knew it was a happy moment but was too overwhelmed to deal with words. Oscar knew she did this to anyone she was comfortable with and knew she was loyal. She'd expressed repeatedly why she loved him and not Lando. Oscar only laughed as she went down her very pointed list of reasons why Oscar was better. Earning a pout from the Brit.

The fans started calling her all sorts of nasty names. It hurt her a little, but Oscar even more. He'd expressed multiple times to his fans not to involve her in drama.

Race weekend got a bit awkward. Journalists wanted to ask the two questions. Oscar was quick to deny them attention and left for free practice.

The nerospicy femal, however, was not as lucky. Somone found her hiding in the garage.

"Are you aware of the photo going around social media right now?" The female reporter asked her.

She hesitated for a moment, trying to find her voice. "Yes." The reporter waited a minute for her to elaborate only to receive silence.

She clears her throat. "Do you have any thoughts about it? Are the rumors true?"

She stares again for a moment. "I think you people are bored and want to pick apart someone else's life instead of your own."

It was the reporters turn to stay in silence. "That may be true for some." She fumbles. "But the concern of the fans is that you'll have a negative effect on the McLaren racing drivers."

"I think the fans you speak of are niave then. Not every human being is the same. I'm in love with Oscar, not Lando, as simple as that. Just because my affection looks different doesn't mean I'm doing anything wrong." The girl shrugs her shoulders. Simply stating a fact of herself.

The reporter leaves in silence. No other words were shared between them.

Oscar saw the article the next day. They were getting ready to head to the track for FP3 and qualifying. "Have you seen this article?" He asked.

"No, what article?" Oscar flips his phone to her. The reporter from yesterday had written an article about their conversation. Interestingly enough, it was exactly what she had said. The journalist was impressed with her honesty and approach to toxic rumors.

Oscar kissed her cheek. "I'm so proud of you."

~

The next time it happened was during an interview in the fan zone. She'd been standing off to the side with the other McLaren staff who follow them around. She likes listening to the fans ask the boys questions.

Then a fan asked a question about her. "Oscar, why is your girlfriend mean to the reporters?"

Both Oscar and Lando rolled their eyes. "She's here right now if you want an honest answer." Oscar smirked.

It was terrifying when Oscar and Lando were waving her up to the stage. She waited for the approval of the staff and security before exchanging seats with the Australian.

He looked so please she was up there. "The fans want to know why you're so 'mean' to the reporters, as they put it." The two boys were laughing hysterically now.

"I personally don't think it's mean. If they don't want an honest answer, then they shouldn't be asking questions." She shrugged. "Is there a specific time you're referring too?"

"When the vouge journalists asked if you were hiding something because you wear loose clothing."

Lando perked up instantly. "This is one of my favorite moments. We went out and got her favorite dinner after this to celebrate."

"Firtly, the reporter had no business asking that. I don't like it when my clothes feel weird and I was already overwhelmed so I wore what I thought was comfortable." Oscar put his arm around her. A hint of pride edging its way across his features. "Secondly, the didn't put the whole story. The reporter asked if I was pregnant, and then when I said no, he proceeded to ask me if I was wearing anything underneath."

"The comeback is the best part."

"I was confused why he asked me this, so I asked if he had anything underneath the hideous mask he was wearing. Then he called me rude." She frowned, but the fans were enjoying the story.

Oscar glances at Lando. "You should tell the next part."

Lando is still chuckling from the last statement. "I was coming around the corner and heard her say that, then I couldn't stop laughing. So obviously I joined in as well."

The other two were shaking their heads at Lando in exasperation as he continued. "When I came up next to her, she asked why he would ask something like that. It's a pretty common question between us, so I explained why he did it and why he shouldn't do it."

"Then he insulted him some more."

Oscar finishes out the story and also laughs at this point. "Most of the things in the article were what Lando said. The others were what she did say. Including asking if this was his way of flirting and turned him down on his advances."

She always missed social cues, and she'd heard some of the drivers flirt by asking what someone had on underneath their clothing. It was a genuine assumption.

Oscar found it most amusing as Lando recounted the story for the first time that evening. She had looked mildly dazed, frustrated, and confused. Oscar took the time, in between laughing, to explain some of the nuances she didn't understand. Including why they were laughing so hard.

~

Next came a conversation with Zak.

The boys were doing media things, so he'd started to try and make conversation with her.

He was a person who did not understand that she's autistic and communicates different then he was expecting. Normally, Oscar or Lando was here to help things flow, but now she was going to need to swim on her own.

"Have you been enjoying Monaco?" He asked.

She played with her fingers to help her brain stay present. Something she often did to stim when she didn't want it to be noticeable. "It's cozy when it's not race weekend. I think the race has made it crowded."

He looked a little surprised. "Do you not like crowds? I thought you did since you come to most of the races."

"Seeing them is fine. Being trapped in them is difficult."

"That's a little odd of a perspective, don't you think?" He laughed. "I feel like you either enjoy the crowds or you hate them."

She didn't understand what he meant by that. Didn't she just say what she thought? Why was he asking the same question? "Factually, I think you can enjoy seeing a crowd, like on TV, and also become claustrophobic when in one."

He didn't know how to respond. The staring became awkward for him as he tried to respond. She just waited. Assuming he had now understood her point. Then he came up with an excuse as to why he needed to duck out of the conversation.

Zak asked Oscar about it later. To which the Australian internally face-palmed. Then, he proceeded to explain the unspoken role.

Zak apologized the next day if he made her uncomfortable. She just looked between him and Oscar. Hoping for an answer as to how he could've done that.

It took a while, but they finally got their. Now Zak goes to her if he ever wants an honest opinion on something.

~

The most recent time actually hurt her. She spent days inside her and Oscar's room. Struggling to eat, sleep, and communicate.

She was lucky that Oscar was around to help her through this. His frustration almost overwhelming his own mind.

Two weeks ago, they had been in Silverstone. It was an amazing race, and she felt happy that she got to share it with him.

She had been making friends with the other WAG's around the paddock. So when Oscar was pulled away, she went to find someone to hang out with until they finished.

She found Kika and Lily in the Williams hospitality. It was warm in the building, so when she sat down with them, she decided to get comfortable and took off her sweatshirt.

Her shirt that day was not the usual baggy t-shirt and jeans. Today's she was wearing a crop-top that showed her stomach, but she felt cute and confident, and Oscar complimented her on it the entire morning. He said she looked good when she's comfortable and that's what matters to him.

Her body was not the ideal body type that meets the standard beauty criteria. Frankly, she didn't care.

She's healthy. She's comfortable. Oscar has said daily that he loves her as she is.

She wasn't expecting the fans in hospitality to ask her anything about it.

When she got up to get water, a few young women approached her. This had happened before, and she assumed they wanted to ask about Oscar or know of they could get a picture with him.

She assumed wrong.

"How come you're not wearing what you normally do?"

"Because I felt comfortable in this today."

"I think the other style suits you better. Don't you think?"

"I don't have a style. This is just comfortable."

"Is this because Oscar likes it better?"

"No, he likes it when I'm comfortable."

She was trying to keep up. All the questions flying at her rapidly. The music was reverberating off the wall. The hospitality staff were cleaning and packing.

Her head started to spin. Her hands flew up to cover her ears. She was going to cry if she didn't get out.

She was thankful the Kika and Lily noticed and got her out of the area. Blocking anyone from speaking to her and ignoring those who tried to stop them.

They ran into Oscar on the way to somewhere quiet. He immediately placed his hands over hers to try and help block out more sound until he could get her to her headphones.

Kika and Lily explained what happened. The females asking her questions were not understanding why she was giving them the same answer. Their intentions were unknown, but it was obvious she looked uncomfortable and cornered in that moment.

So he led her away into his driver room and told her she could lock the door and he'd come get her when it was time to leave. She obliged, turning off the lights to help her senses.

She curled up in the corner and soothed herself until Oscar came back.

Someone had taken a video of the encounter, and people started asking questions about her. Why does she do the things she does? It didn't make any sense to them. It made her frustrated because they made her out to be an alien on her own planet.

Her body couldn't take it anymore. She stayed in her corner with the lights off and shut out the world.

Except for Oscar. He sat in the dark with her. They ate meals on the floor. He helped her bathe in the dark. She felt so lucky to have found someone who understands and cares as much as he does.

His PR team was trying to do something about the video. It wasn't right for it to be posted, and McLaren was doing what they could, but It wasn't enough.

So Oscar took matters into his own hands. He decided to answer all their questions. With her permission, of course.

She cried when she read it. He was happy that she felt safe enough with him to let herself unmask, but he wanted her to be able to unmask anywhere. They were taking a step in the right direction, and they both ate comfort food that night.

Instagram story message because idk how people do SMAU's: "I want to take a minute to address the video that was posted about my girlfriend recently. My girlfriend is Autistic, meaning that things can become overwhelming easily. You might not understand everything she does, but you don't have to. She is her own person and has her own life. What she answers to questions is her truth. If you don't want an honest answer, don't ask the question.

-Oscar

[james-is-here]

Part one

Sections: Joining Ateez, Chan sees you've debuted again, Growing closer to Seonghwa, You plague Chan's feed, What happened after the end of Pt. 1/ You talk to Skz

Blogs: @heartbinn | @leezanetheofficial @belladonna6-6-6 @aygotnobitches who suggested some ideas to me which helped me make this.

Tags: Angst, fluff, Mn and SKZ make up, mention of a Sasaeng, Mn gets cut, idk what else to put here, Skz are like super regretful for what they did, Chan finds out your taken?, Seonghwa is protective over you in the airport part. That's all, i think.

(Joining Ateez)

Awkwardly shuffling on your feet, you eyes darting everywhere as you wait. A few weird glances were thrown at you. Did you wear something bad? Just converse, baggy jeans, and a light blue hoodie, a beanie also fit snug on your head.

You haven't felt this nervous since...since Chan brought you to meet the other boys he picked.

"Mn?" Looking to your left, you were expecting your new manager but instead were met with Hongjoong. "O-Oh, h-hi. I thought...I'm sorry." "It's okay. He ended up having to take care of something but I hope it's okay that I'm here instead to help you." "Of course it's okay, I-I'm just...a bit nervous. I...I haven't felt this way in a while." You kept it simple, didn't want to give too much information.

"Real quick, um, I wasn't told anything. Was just told that you'd be in the lobby." "I'm debuting aga- debuting with a group called Ateez, i think that's the name." "Yeah, it is! I'm the leader. Come on, I can introduce you to the others." "Wait, um, the last group I was in...well, they began excluding me, actually. Y-You seem really nice I just might take awhile to adjust." "That's okay." He smiled at you, it was so nice and genuine that you couldn't help but smile back and continue walking.

Meeting them was awkward and your aura must've been unwelcoming as Hongjoong introduced you, you could see the others were unsure but Hongjoong rested a hand gently on your arm and gave a little nod. You relax, exhaling slowly after taking a deep breath. "Sorry...I-I didn't mean to make any of you uncomfortable. I just left a...bad environment and I'm still adjusting. I'm really sorry." You bow deeply before standing up again.

"Let's do some ice breakers, yeah?" Hongjoong suggested and you nod as the others vocalized.

(Chan finds out you debuted again.)

He and the boys were crushed that you left. The sunshine twins wouldn't leave your room and Chan had found your cut outs in the trash and taped everything back up.

He was the one to call you the most, second was Jisung. He also texted you, 'Mn-ie <3' staring back at him every time he does. How could he never realize what they were doing to him? How could they not have noticed Mn wasn't included?

He sighs, the disconnected voicemail playing for the umpteenth time and he ends the attempted call. As per usual, he goes to any social media app in order to see if anything about you has been posted.

After months of finding nothing, he finally came upon a picture of you, a solo photo of yourself surrounded by a few blurbs and reading over it Chan noticed it was little details about yourself. Name, birthday, age, favorite hobby. It was a 'get to know me' photo. Swiping to the next photo, it was you in the middle of a group of boys, they were doing jazz hands around you as you smiled sheepishly. Reading the caption was like a knife twisted in his chest, he had found a group. What hurts Chan is how much happier he looks, he use to be that happy with them but they pushed him away, he doesn't even know why they did.

"Hyung? What's wrong?" He looks up to see Changbin in front of him. He lifts his phone lazily and the younger sighs. "You know calling him is futile." "No, not that..." He reaches out, handing his phone to Changbin who takes it, a moment later he's sitting on Chan's bed with a sigh and setting the phone down. "H-How could we have been so...blind? Why...Why did we push him away? That wasn't fair to him." "I ask myself the same thing, Bin." "Do you want to tell the others?" "Maybe. I know they've been trying to get updates out of manager-nim about Mn but...yeah, no, let's tell them."

Later that day, Chan told the rest of them about Mn and some were upset but some others were glad that after what they did to him, at least he found a better environment. All of them were beating themselves up. They all agreed that what they did was wrong but now...they can't get him back.

(Growing closer to Seonghwa)

You remember it clearly, the moment where Seonghwa gave you the same comfort someone else use to give.

It had been a year since you had joined Ateez, you felt so much more happy, less of a burden and more of an actual member of a group. All of them were protective over you after learning more about you. They would say you're a precious soul that needs protected at all costs.

All costs...even if it risks their safety.

You were walking with them through an airport, attached to Wooyoung the whole time but he didn't mind. Readjusting your jacket, you notice a lack of weight in your pocket and turn around, noticing your wallet now a few steps from where you just came from. You must've missed your pocket after putting something back.

You say a quick 'wait' to the boys around you and you jog over to your wallet, picking it up but another hand grabs it then suddenly a butterfly knife is pointed at you. "Woah-" "Why do you leave?!" A sasaeng, you just stared at her, you literally panic and every possible thought you could've had left as she advanced.

It felt like ages but it was really five seconds that so much unfolded. She lunged forward, blade catching your cheek at the same time Seonghwa was the first to reach you and pull you away. Security restraining the girl and taking your wallet from her.

Seonghwa walked backwards, taking you away from her as his arms squeezed around you when he heard you let out a small cry. One hand moves to the back of your neck, keeping you in the crook of his neck as he watches them take the girl away, hand squeezing your nape slightly before brushing through your hair, soothing you and helping you calm down.

Hongjoong was next to you guys shortly after Seonghwa grabbed you. "Shh, it's okay, Mn. She's gone." He whispered before reaching under the older males chin and thumbing at your cheek under the shallow cut. "Oh, Mn." He backs away, it wasn't deep, no blood, but it still looked bad.

"Come on, Mnie." You couldn't help but finally move your arms and hug Seonghwa tightly. You haven't heard that nickname in ages and hearing it from someone who sees you, it comforted you so much that you couldn't help the new wave of tears that fell but quickly pulled back and wiped under your eye as the tears stung the cut. Seonghwa's hand replaces yours, helping you wipe your tears and while you feel appreciated and cared for, Seonghwa is fighting himself internally as he found you the sweetest thing ever and officially doesn't like seeing you cry.

"I like Mn-ie..." "You do? Then I'll keep using it. That okay?" You nod softly, finally smiling at Seonghwa. He giggles softly, ruffling up your hair gently before giving a small head pat and guiding you away with Hongjoong on your other side.

(You plague Chan's feed)

Two years since learning about your re-debut, he's seen you everywhere.

Clips of your fan cams, pictures of your outfits, screenshots fans have taken from videos. He didn't stop himself from watching the videos or looking a photos for a moment longer than needed.

He refreshed the twitter feed and the top tweet was an Ateez Update fan page. Even fan pages are plaguing his feed.

There was a link, posted 20 minutes ago.

'Nn live featuring Seonghwa and Wooyoung'

He opened the link and it took him to the live. It looked like you were in your bed, knees pulled up as you talked to Wooyoung about something but all he could pay attention to was your looks. He still finds you adorable. He can't help but sit up in his bed, pulling his knees up as well and taking his pillow to hug as he watched you. You looked...happy. The familiar sting began in his eyes as you leaned back into Wooyoung, the boy wrapping his arms around your neck and pulling you back as Seonghwa started to tell a story.

He thought you two were cute together but a soft gasp and his lips part when you stare at the other male across from you. That glint, that shine. He knows that look and he chokes out a sob. You can't be gone. You still love him, right? You haven't moved on just yet, right?

He leaves his phone at his feet as he leans back, regret eating at him as he cries into his pillow. Minho came in moments later and saw Chan asleep but his phone still playing. He picked up the phone, sighing softly when he sees your face and your smile before turning it off and putting it to the side, moving to cover his hyung up and he leaves with one more look to Chan before he's out the door.

(The award ceremony, Chan POV then it switches to your POV)

Watching you kiss Seonghwa was like getting the air punched out of him with a bus.

The choked sob he let out was pathetic but he didn't care. He saw someone he loved disappear from right in front of him all over again. How could he take you for granted? If he just noticed the neglect sooner, you'd still be there with him, with the boys.

A hand is placed on his shoulder, he looks over to see Felix who sighs. "Chan..." He sniffs but it's futile as another sob escapes him and he just lets the tears fall. "A-After this long I-I still m-miss him. I-I still thought I c-could get him back..." Felix pulls him into a hug, letting him crying into his shoulder for a moment.

"Hyung...it's been seven years..." "Don't you think I know that?!" He snapped quietly but still let Felix attempt to fix his makeup. "I-I know...that it's b-been seven years...b-but he was...he was my f-first boyfriend, I loved him and it's hurting me because I still regret not seeing the neglect sooner. How could I, his fucking leader, not realize he was missing from practices or meetings. How could I be so blind?" "Hyung, we're at fault too." "Yeah, but I'm the main one that should've seen it. I-I'm the...the leader, I...I should've seen it..." His voice gradually became a whisper.

"Channie-Hyung..." Inhaling softly, he lifts his head, spinning around to come face to face with you and Seonghwa.

(POV Change)

As Seonghwa led you back, you realized that you just walked away. You didn't acknowledge them, you didn't wave back but do you have to? Last you checked, they didn't care about you but you still stopped in your tracks, zoned out for a moment as the male holding your hand tried to bring you back.

"Hey, Mn-ie, come back to me. You okay?" "Stray Kids is who hurt me...Th-They were the ones to- to shove me away and ignore me and neglect me." "Oh, Mn..." "I-I'm sorry I didn't t-tell any of you sooner, I just-" You bit your lip, willing yourself to not cry but seeing them after so long seemed to have brought the pain back. You could see the hope in Chan's eyes before you turned away and you found it unbelievable because even he was neglecting you but you also...felt bad?

"Hey, don't cry, it's okay." "I-I don't know why I feel guilty, Hwa. I-I shouldn't be feeling guilty and yet..." You take a deep breath, wiping your tears away carefully. "Maybe you should forgive them?" "Why should I do that? I was chosen to be in this group but then they were pushing me away and forgetting me. What was the point of adding me if I was to be forgotten?" "Mn-ie, they regret it. I could see it on their faces as I came to get you and they called out for you. They want you back, at least as a friend."

"But they-" "Mn...You know what else I can see?" "What?" You sniff. "You want your friends back." Seonghwa smiled at you gently, he knows you miss them deep down and thinking about it, you're still hurt from what they did to you but you do want them back. "Come on, Mn. You miss them and they've been missing you. I just know it."

With a sigh, you nod and Seonghwa takes you back to them. When you get there, you see Chan in Felix's arms. "I...I should've seen it..." You hear him mutter, stepping closer, the other boys have seen you returned and you speak up. "Channie-Hyung..." He turns towards you, staring at you, stunned that you came back and you have tear stains on your cheek.

You glance at Seonghwa who nods gently which just barely convinced you to step closer to the others. They watch your every step, waiting for what you're gonna do or say.

Smiling awkwardly, you reach out your hand, gesturing to Chan when all he did was stare at it before he took it. You pull him towards you, wrapping your arms around him in a hug. A small gasp leaves Chan as he stands there, arms hesitating around you and you laugh. "You can hug back, you know?" It was instant, his arms tight around you and his face buried in your shoulder. "We're sorry, Mn...I-I'm sorry." He cried and you rub his back.

"Hyung?" You look over to Felix on your left. He's as tall as you now and he looks even more precious, if that's even possible. "C'mere." You extend the arm around Chan's back out to him and he hugs you as well.

When Felix and Chan finally pull away, another member is suddenly wrapping his arms around your middle. Looking down, you laugh softly while wrapping your arms around Jisung. You also hug Hyunjin and Jeongin.

"We really are sorry, Mn." "I know...but what you did wasn't nice..." They nod, lowering their heads. "but I think after this long...I can sort of forgive you..." They looked like a deer in headlights making you giggle. "We can be friends again. I miss you guys." They smile, Felix hugs you again before stepping back and you turn to Chan.

You take a look towards Seonghwa and he nods. You don't even have to say anything and it honestly shocks you how well he can read you.

"Channie?" He looks up, his hands wringing together. You think you've never seen him looking so nervous. "Come here." He steps up to you and you take his hands into yours. "I know that I left abruptly...and didn't talk to you before leaving but you know why, correct?" He nods his head, his eyes still downcast. "I can see that you had some hope but I'm with Seonghwa..." He nods again and you can see tears welling up in his eyes again. " We can be friends though..." You smile. "Is that okay?" His eyes finally meet yours, smiling a bit. "Yeah, th-that's fine. I-I did have hope but honestly the most I wanted was just to have you back with us. I-It felt so...weird without you even after so long. I missed you...but I'm really glad you found someone else...we were terrible to you- I was terrible to you."

"Channie, your rambling." "S-sorry." He laughs before gasping and staring at you, glancing to Seonghwa then back at you. You kissed his cheek but the look in your eye was forgiving and he hugged you again. "But do anything dumb like that again and I'm gone." They knew you were half joking, there was a smile on your face and they laughed.

"Hyung, we gotta go fix your make up before going on stage." "Right, sorry for keeping you for so long." "You're fine, Mn. It's good to have you back." "You can't take me away though, you'd have to fight him and Wooyoung." "What do you mean?" Hyunjin asks and all you do is wink before stepping back to Seonghwa and leaving for your table again. "See you guys later."

There's still apart of you that never wanted to do that but Seonghwa made a point later that what you did was a good thing. You've had a grudge for seven years and he saw how regretful they looked. You agreed that it was time to let it go only with some hesitance.

But you realized in the passing days that they made up for it. If you had similar off days they would invite you out, they talked to you more whether it be nonsense or what they did that week. Jisung and Wooyoung jokingly fought for you. Han has made a couple comments about stealing you from Ateez and the fans found the joke fighting adorable.

When Stay noticed that the boys looked happier, lighter, of course the detective Stays did their digging and the most they found was a few pictures of you with a couple of the boys you've posted either at public events or pictures you've taken during outings you've had with the boys.

It doesn't matter though, all they care about is that you've seemed to have made up with Stray Kids --even though all they knew about your departure was that it was mental health issues-- and they're happy to see you with them again.

[ultrone]

⋮ 🎯 ⌗ 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬 𝐱 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠

synopsis. click here (request)

cw. none

wc. 1.6ish k

It was a Thursday afternoon, and you and your friends had nothing to do after school, which rarely happened during the week, so you decided to go to an arcade nearby to have some fun.

As you and your friends walked into the arcade, the sounds of beeping machines and loud music filled your ears. You looked around and saw rows of flashing arcade games and ticket dispensers, each one beckoning you to come and play.

Chad and Mindy immediately rushed to the Whac-A-Mole machine, both trying to impress their girlfriends by winning the big teddy bear.

As Tara heads over to the claw crane, you and Amber join Wes at the photo booth. You all cram into the small space and start snapping pictures. You can't help but notice the discomfort between your girlfriend and your best friend. It's not like they hate each other, but you've always known that there's been some underlying tension between them. Wes has always thought that Amber is too possessive, and Amber, on the other hand, gets jealous easily when you spend time with Wes rather than with her.

"Come on, Ambs, smile!" you say, trying to get her to loosen up, as she seemed a bit stiff.

"I am smiling!" Amber retorts, her expression serious.

Wes looks awkward and uncomfortable, not sure where to put his hands. You, on the other hand, are goofing off and grabbing both of them, trying to make the picture as silly as possible.

"Hey, don't be so tense, Wes," you say, teasing him. "Just pretend Amber isn't here."

Amber shoots you a look, clearly not amused by your joke. You all manage to take a few more pictures before the machine spits out the strip of pictures.

You quickly grabbed the strip and examined the pictures. As you looked at them, you burst out laughing. Amber and Wes looked awkward while you looked all cute and happy in the middle. 

"Wow, we really know how to make an awkward photo look good," you teased, holding up the photo strip with a grin.

Amber rolled her eyes playfully, "Speak for yourself, I look like a total dork."

Wes nodded in agreement, "Yeah, I don't know what's going on with my hands in that last one."

Amber rolled her eyes jokingly as you snapped a picture of it with your phone and uploaded it to your Instagram story. "Of course, you have to share it with the world," she teased.

"Well, it's not every day we take such a stunning family portrait," you joked with a grin, putting the photo strip back in its sleeve.

As you all walked around the arcade, you could hear the competitive shouts of Chad and Mindy as they continued their Whac-A-Mole match.

"Take that!" Chad yelled triumphantly as he hit yet another mole.

Mindy rolled her eyes and tried to catch up, but Chad was too quick. Liv and Anika cheered them on, but you could tell they were secretly rooting for their respective partners. 

After a few more rounds, Chad emerged victorious, proudly claiming the giant teddy bear as his prize, and handing it over to Liv. Mindy pouted for a moment, but then a mischievous grin crossed her face.

"Fine, you win," Mindy grumbled, holding up her hands in defeat. "But don't get too comfortable, I'm still the reigning champ at air hockey." She grinned slyly at Chad, challenging him to a rematch. Chad grinned, accepting the challenge, and the group headed over to the air hockey table.

As you kept playing different games for the next hour, you began to feel hungry. You looked around at your friends and noticed that they were starting to get a little restless too.

"Hey guys, are you getting hungry?" you asked, “All that gaming has left me starving,” you said, rubbing your stomach.

"Yeah, I could go for some food," Chad replied.

"Same," Mindy chimed in. "I could really go for some fries right about now."

Liv, Anika, and Tara nodded in agreement, and you all decided to head towards the food court.

You made your way through the arcade until you finally reached the food court, and you all split up to order your meals. Chad, Amber and Mindy went for burgers and fries, while Liv and Anika opted for some sushi. You, Tara and Wes decided to try out the new pizza joint that had just opened up.

As the three of you sat down at a table with your steaming slices of pizza, you couldn't help but take a big bite of your slice, moaning in satisfaction. "Damn, this pizza's good as fuck," you said with your mouth full. Wes nodded in agreement, his mouth also stuffed with pizza. Tara followed suit, agreeing with the both of you.

Just then, you noticed Amber and the others approaching your table with their food. "Hey, babe, try this," you said to Amber, offering her a bite of your pizza.

Amber hesitated for a moment before leaning in and taking a small bite. Her eyes widened in surprise as she tasted the pizza. "Wow, this is really good," she said, giving you a kiss on the cheek in appreciation.

You grinned, reaching over to grab one of her fries without asking. She rolled her eyes at you in a playful way, clearly used to your antics.

As you all sat at the table enjoying your meals, Mindy brought up the topic of the Stab movies.

"Okay, but can we talk about how shitty Stab 7 was?" Mindy said, shaking her head.

Chad nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I mean, I couldn't even finish it."

Wes spoke up. "Yeah, Stab 6 is still the best one out of all of them."

Amber looked at Wes with a serious expression. "No, it’s not. Stab 5 is clearly the best one," she argued.

Wes raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about? Stab 6 had a way better plot and the acting was way better."

Amber chuckled, almost teasing, "No way, Stab 5 had better character development and a more interesting storyline.” She continued, "Come on, Wes, you can't seriously think Stab 6 was better. It was so predictable and cliché," Amber said, “Besides, it-”

You kicked Amber under the table as you noticed she was getting a bit too heated. Giving her a look, you signaled her to calm down a bit.

"Whatever," she muttered, taking a sip of her drink.

Anika spoke up, trying to ease the tension. "I think all of them are good in their own way." 

Liv nodded in agreement. "Yeah, they're all pretty cool."

Mindy chimed in, "All except Stab 7. That one was a disaster."

Chad nodded in agreement, "Yeah, second that. They should have stopped after Stab 6."

You all laughed, relieved that the debate had ended on a humorous note. The group then started discussing their plans for the upcoming weekend, debating between a beach day or going to the movies. As you all finished your meals, you continued chatting and joking around, enjoying each other's company. The arcade hangout had been a great idea, and you made a mental note to plan another one soon.

After finishing your meals, you all decided it was time to head home. As you walked out of the food court, you and Amber made your way to her car. You got into the passenger seat and she started the engine, pulling out of the parking lot.

As she began to drive, you noticed the way Amber's hand instantly found its way onto your thigh, something that had become second nature to her by now. You smiled at her and leaned your head back against the headrest, enjoying the feeling of her touch. You placed your hand on top of hers, interlocking your fingers. 

As you sat in the car, you couldn't help but ask Amber about the debate earlier. "Hey babe, what was that about with Wes and the Stab movies?" you asked curiously.

Amber rolled her eyes, "Well, it's not my fault he has such bad taste." She replied sarcastically, a slight grin on her face.

You knew there was more to it than just the movie, though, so you pressed on. "Come on, you just did it to mess with him, didn't you?" You said, giving her a knowing look.

Amber denied it, but you knew better. "Babe, you literally made me watch Stab 6 two days ago because it's in your top 3," you pointed out.

Amber chuckled, "Well yeah, but 5 is still better."

You sighed and said, "Baby, you have to stop being so mean to Wes. He's actually trying to get along with you, you know?"

Amber relented, "Fine, I'm sorry. I'll try to be nicer to him from now on."

You couldn't help but notice how cute Amber looked when she was being stubborn. You knew that apologizing didn't come easy for her, so you smiled at how adorable she looked when she finally gave in. As she stopped at a red light, you turned to face her, gently grabbing her chin and turning her head to look into her eyes.

"I really do appreciate it, babe," you said, your voice filled with sincerity. "I love you, you know that?" you said, looking deeply into her eyes.

Amber's cheeks flushed as she smiled back at you. "I love you too," she replied softly.

You leaned in and pressed your lips against hers in a sweet kiss. It felt like time stood still as you savored the moment, feeling the warmth of her lips against yours. When you finally pulled away, you rested your forehead against hers and smiled. As the lights turned green, Amber shifted the gear and continued driving into the night. The streetlights illuminated her face, casting a warm glow over her features. You leaned back in your seat, feeling content and at peace, as the city passed by in a blur outside the car window

[nemmennem]

Male Teen Reader x Creepypasta [ch. 2]

"i-i-i think i will go with you" you said, your words trembling and your body still shaking in toby's hug

"Oh shit i just gaslightd them into becoming creepypasta" toby thaugh

yes... he indeed manipulated you into becoming creepypasta

"you can relax now kid, there is nothing to stress about" toby said ruffling your hair " you remind me of jeff"

"the killer?"

"ye, your hair look like him and you are little pale, oh, and how old are you and what's your name?"

you had black curly hair that reached your shoulders and you were slightly pale, but that was probably because of fear

"I'm 15, and my name is Victor"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"let's end this nice chat and get down to more serious matters, first of all, are you aware that you have to abandon all your family and friends? oh no, wait, they are dead after all, sorry I forgot, and secondly you have to take all the important slash personal stuff, things like I don't know, family photos, normal clothes, weapons and preferably everything fits into some kind of backpack"

"ok, just give me a minute"

"if anything I'll be waiting at the front door, do not think about running away"

you began to pack, you packed some clothes, some books, a family album, your own shampoo, you left the room and took one last look at the friendly walls,you took your father's holster and ammunition tucked into your jacket pocket, the bag was thrown on your back and you left, the first thing you saw was a happy toby

"you don't even know how glad I am that you chose to stick with us"

you started walking in a direction known only toby, it was quiet, neither you nor toby made a sound while you walked, until toby broke the grave silence

""you are aware that in the place we are going there is more, you know…. people, as if to put it nicely, harmed by life more than others? I'm not saying that they are worse, or emotionally unstable, but be ready to change the ways of perceiving people and expect to collide with a wall, you are the youngest person to join our group, I am not saying there will be pressure on you, but there will be people who will not like it, remember that I am with you if you need me... well and now formal matters, creepypastas are divided into three ranks, proxi, the highest ranks, we perform more important tasks and manage easier missions, half proxi, are in the middle, perform more important tasks but manage none, at the very bottom there are ordinary pastas, they perform the tasks assigned to them, this is the rank you will get… if the boss agrees, of course"

there was an awkward silence between the two of you

"the problem is that my boss may not agree to you joining… I know, I know, i should have told you about it right away and please don't ask what will happen if he doesn't agree"

oh shit.mp4

"oh, we're already here"

In front of you was a large mansion, a very fancy mansion, you felt a strange sensation, as if someone was entering your head. Toby walked to the door and with a friendly wave of his hand, invited you inside... its even more fancy inside, literal deffinition of classical luxury mansion

"Oh masky!"

"... No no no, how? how did you get him to join us!?"

"Masky has a problem again"

"with?"

"toby"

"I'm gonna see what is it about this time?"

"Hey guys, what went wrong this time?..... is that a teen?" said the legend himself

"jeff the killer?" you asked

"yep, that's me" jeff said proudly

Jeff then shook my hand

"wow, you would really convince a child to become one of us, I guess you have my respect, and you, what's your name?"

"victor"

"no alias?"

"I haven't thought about it yet"

Jeff snapped his fingers

"V? something from the name but not being the name, unlike more than half of the pastes that simply used the name and an additional adjective, I was the first so I could"

"i'll think about it"

"Thank you for considering my proposal"

"Jeff, what was it all about? It takes you a long time to "check" what's going on" teen? or not tall adult joined conversation, he wore... pretty much 1:1 link cosplay "New pasta? and it's teen! Do you have any gamesens?"

" I guess?"

"oh god in heaven thank you for a person who is a creepypasta and isn't old... oh and im ben"

he then left laughing with joy

"typical ben" said jeff " he will won't leave you alone, it's pretty late you know"

"I was going to introduce him to slender" said toby "and get him key to his room"

"good luck" jeff said and went his way

"this will not go well" said masky

"dont stress about it"

you two went up the stairs (masky went to his room).you stood in front of a large wooden door, needless to say it was pretty, Toby entered and you went after him, there he was... slenderman, you knew him

"hey boss" toby said and bowed

"hello" you said and bowed

"soo boss... i wanted to"

"yes he can join us, i can read minds toby"

"oh... that's all?"

"yes, Victor, your offical introduction with presence of other proxy's will be tomorrow, i hope toby will help you prepare to that, right?"

"of course sir"

"now just go to your room and sleep well"

you just stood there awkwardly, and then you left with toby

"that was fast" you said

"yeah, it was, i will show you where is your room and then leave you alone to allow you to get used to your new surroundings"

"ok"

with this words your first day in slender man mansion ended

----------------[ NEXT DAY ]---------------

new day, new you, you woke up at 6 am, you may have woken up in a new place but your sleeping habits remain the same, you got up and did your daily routine (each room had a bathroom)

"Should I leave?" you thought "well, only a handful of pasties recognize me, others will probably think I'm a burglar and kill me on the spot. Fuck it, I'm leaving"

you left your room and you decided to wander around the mansion, your main goal was to find someone you knew and stick with them for your safety, you had your gun of course

"hmm?"

you stopped reading the book

"Whose steps were those, they seem light, Ben sleeps until breakfast so it can't be him, Hey, he gets up early but his steps are heavy, maybe someone broke in? this needs to be checked"

you wanted to walk down the stairs when strong arm hooked you by neck, you also felt knife at your throat

"be quiet and maybe we'll reach an agreement" a femine voice spoke

you remained silent and the person speaking threw you into some dark room. Due to the force of the throw, you fell to the floor, in entrance of the room stood woman she had black wavy shoulder-length hair, a black sweater and black and white buggy pants. The detail that made her stand out was her white mask

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry for all grammar errors

[themightymoose]

Frenemies

So is this photo was from when Zoe first joined the pet shop

So is Zoe the last one to join

And if so, how much has passed since then. Because she looks like the same age

AND PENNY

WHO JOINED LAST

STOP DISPROVING MY HEADCANONS DAMMIT

Okay so it would be one year ago Penny joined The Squad

My headcanons 🥺

imma ignore canon >:)

Pepper and Zoe being so excited for her

Penny's just like "No, bitch they're gonna kill each other."

Blythe brushing Penny

Vinnie being excited about Penny's party

Vinnie middle name is Alfonso?

Huh

Vinnie almost fucking died

They all look so traumatized

He is legit scarred for life

"I think you look pretty cute without your tail, Vinnie!" :)

What parents Sunil? What are you talking about sir

Uh oh

Blythe is like "Well this is awkward. :/"

Guys your hyperfixations aren't Penny's hyperfixation

"And we all get a pie that we can throw at Zoe!" "WhAT-" damn 💀

Girlie just got shot into another dimension

Which is a reoccurring theme of this show

"I look terrible in lilac." NO YOU DON'T SUNIL

Russell looks so snazzy

"And then we have the skunk dunking booth where we can dunk Pepper!" "WHAT-"

The shaaaaadddeee

"Okay that's kinda funny actually-" at least she's taking it like a champ

Pepper's middle name is Mildred 💀

Yeah she seems like a Mildred to me

The fellas are just so silly :)

What's Minka doing during this

Buttercream just comes from out of nowhere

The awkward tension

They should just kiss me thinks

Pepper is so shit at lying

Russell trying to give confidence in his mongoose bf <3

Vinnie's cranky

Oh hi Minka

SUNIL'S MOTHER AND FATHER?????

I'm so confused

Vinnie drew the Mona Lisa

Vinnie is going through fucking hell right now

How the fuck did she get that hay bale inside

They're laughing so passive aggressively

Blythe has no idea does she

Vinnie is so sad he can't perform a dance for Penny

Blythe giving Vinnie some encouragement

Vinnie's so happy

Pepper just got flung into the wall

Damn hit a nerve there

Vinnie breaking them up to make the conversation about him

King

"HE'LL DANCE AT MY PARTY!"

They are so confused

Minka and Vinnie only joining Zoe's party for the food

Relatable

Sunil and Russell giggling

Damn this is awkward 💀

Did Zoe just flirt with Penny

Got some smooth moves I'll give her that

You can tell that even though they're literally about to kill each other they truly do love Penny

And I think that's beautiful

Penny feels like a child of divorce rn

The girls are fiiiggghhhtinnnngggg

I think the fire hydrant house night be everyone's comfort place

"Okay, you two. You're grounded."

They all probably think Zoe and Pepper are Blythe's favorites

"Blythe that's fucking stupid."

Okay this is so sweet I'll get cavities

They're sharing their feelings

Pepper and Zoe were just jealous of each other

Please excuse me while I rewatch this scene five hundred times

Now kiss

Did they forget Penny exists

I do too sometimes

Mostly with Minka though

Sunil is so happy for Vinnie

Penny and Vinnie's friendship means so much to me I love them

Vinnie's showing off his vocals right now

YESSSSSS GET IT KINGGGGG 😩😩😩😩😩😩

[leenaur143]

Bad Lawyer & Crazy Dog, an unconventional love story

JUST FINISHED THE LAST EPISODE OF LAWS OF ATTRACTION!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Okay this is your HUGE spoiler warning because I have so many thoughts and my love for this show knows no bounds but I don't wanna take away from the magic of living it through on your own so go watch it!!!

Overall episode rating: 9.5/10

Overall show rating: 10/10

I was so tempted to take away points for that SILLY GUITAR AND THE SINGING 😭🤣 but it's fine they can't help that they're in love dhhxhdj

So, currently writing this at midnight just after 2/9/2023 which was Tinn and Charn's wedding day!!!!!!! These two goofs have come so far and yeah, couldn't be happier for them 🫶

I took a pause in the middle of the episode to collate my thoughts and here was the list I made about the first half:

1. the mma boxing unconventional fight between tinn and nawin, it was giving 'youtube boxing: worst bits!' but it made me laugh so its fine 😭

2. thee having no one truly there for him except tan - his fellow bodyguards didn't even back him, meaning ever since he started working for tan's family he truly has known no one who cares and loves him deeply which 🥹😭 how did he manage to stay so kind through all that

3. thattep that psychopath.

4. nawin being the best character ever

5. how similar nawin and charn are (one just has a few dozen more braincells than the other

6. how charn planned that entire plot knowing the risks not only to his physical self but knowing he could be risking his entire career but he's ready to do that as we saw when thattep called him to prison 🤧👏

7. the one guy that said you dropped the soap in the prison showers 🥲

8. tan using his annoyingness to his advantage and celebrating being banned from an airline - the most tan thing to do tbh

9. thee and tinn link up AGAIN!!!

10. the wedding talk made me emosh.. the entire proposal (lets ignore the singing but even that wouldnt wipe the huge grin off my face as i was watching it) i love the storyline of the song though (hats off to that tumblr user who explained the story behind the song, this was perfect

11. emotional during the seeking of blessings from charn's mum

12. grandma is a gem 💯

13. maya and rose doing so much to help the people they love - they truly are the MVPs

14. tongkhao's dream living on 🥹 all she wanted on Tinn's birthday was for him to be happy and start a family with someone he loves, and he did it 🥹😭🤧

Also, completely ignore the fact that I skimmed over the whole exposing scene because it was decent but I knew, I just knew Charn wasn't gonna die today and a bullet wouldn't be the thing that ended him so IM GLAD I WAS RIGHT 😭

The wedding! OH THE WEDDING 🥹👏 It was beautiful, just everyone who loves them there and present in form or in spirit - seeing the dolls and knowing Tonkhao was there just 🥹 maybe I'm just an emotional wreck but this episode really got me in my feels

I did laugh my butt off when they were taking wedding photos because why so stiff 😭🤣 It served prom in a nice way WHICH IS FINE it was just looking a bit awkward and hence it was funny 🤭

Also I could write entire essays about Tan's storyline but the fact that he never held any resentment for his dad even after all of THAT is just astounding, and it highlighted how even though Thee and Tan are very different, down to their core values, they're the same which is why they're perfect for each other

Speaking of perfect for each other, seeing Rose and Maya get engaged!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH I WAS SO HAPPY FOR THEMM

When Tinn said 'one day' concerning the conversation about the legality of same sex marriage in Thailand, I got in my feels again as you can probably gather is a common theme here, and I realised how much good shows like this promote.. and yeah I won't waffle on too much about that but it was really powerful 🥹

All in all, if we learnt anything from Laws of Attraction, I'd comfortably say it would be... how to say doll in Thai 🤣 (WHAT? It sounds so amazing! tuktā (pronounced too-ka-ta), it's a much better word!)

No, but seriously, what a show, I'd definitely recommend watching it and I hope, whoever is still reading my midnight rambles, enjoys it as much as I did 🫰

[symphonic-scream]

The Phantom Queers Notes

Thanks to the ever patient Cap for putting up with me gushing about them nonstop! Love you cap

Anyways. Ahem.

Firstly; the Noir's mural. I said it was based off of official art from Mementos Mission? Yeah so I wanted to add that image to this post so anyone who hasn't seen it can see it and know what I meant

So it's like this. But with more vines.

And now onto the notes

Haru's dad slowly adapting to his daughter being with someone like Makoto and just,

Okumura: invite your wife to our next brunch. I'm ready to have a meal with the person who makes you glow

Haru: are you ready for that? Neither of us want to push you

Okumura: I'm ready. I love you, and you love her so much. It's about time I let you show me such

This is after like. Eight years of him knowing Makoto. There were some very awkward talks in the beginning but mans did his research! He knows how to be respectful!

He even frames a photo of their little family and keeps it on his desk, with little trans and lesbian flag stickers in the corners. He updates it every year as his grandsons grow older

(THATS RIGHT I HAVE MORE ABOUT THE SONS YOULL GET TO LEARN ABOUT THEM)

Teenage Makoto and Haru going to see a spy movie as their first date as girlfriends, Makoto nervous because sure Haru knows she's trans already, but what if-

They end up making out halfway through in the back of the theatre.

Haru: this was lovely! We should go on some more dates, yes?

Makoto: y-yeah! That would be very nice,

And Haru gives her a goodbye kiss, a full one right out in the middle of the street, waving her fingers with a little wink as she gets on her train, Makoto just standing there watching her new girlfriend walk away with her heart beating out of her chest

Their first place together is a dorm at university. They push the beds together to make a double, though they sleep so closely they'd only need a single. Little flags on the bag of the door, little polaroids from dates and hangouts with their new friends on a wall, the way Makoto's study space is sparse, with clicky pens and things to safely chew on, and Haru's having plants and life and so many colours-

Makoto finding out Haru's actually pregnant and just. She's so relieved. She didn't ruin it all for her love,

But Haru would've been so happy either way, even if their kid didn't have Makoto's eyes or, like their second and third, her rebellion and cute little nose-

Okay gonna lay out the sons real quick! They have three sons; Seiji is their first born, has Makoto's sharp red eyes, Haru's curls, and a general softer shape to him. When he's like middle school age he goes a bit emo, remains into dark colours and music. And he loves to cook! Loves food

Then there's the twins, Kazuto and Hiroto. Dark curls, Haru's softer eyes, but they have that Niijima spark, they look more like Makoto did as a kid. Identical twins too! Pure evil. Menaces. Cunning and with sharp grins, their moms are lucky they aren't into arson

Sae, just barely out of university, now the legal guardian of her little brother and just. Sitting there as this little middle schooler comes out to her, and-

Well. She has to do everything she can for her sister.

Makoto: here, let's look at my childhood photos

Hifumi: you, do that? Look at photos from before you transitioned?

Makoto: it's different for everyone. I'm fine with it, I know Yusuke has a select few saved, Futaba doesn't like it for other reasons-

Makoto: I did change my name though. We have nothing that remains with my dead name on it. That is where I draw my boundaries. I cannot handle hearing it on my worst days

Hifumi: I see

Makoto: it wasn't me. And while I'm not as feminine as you or Haru, I'm still a woman

Hifumi: I'm starting to make sense of this all, thank you so much

Makoto: that's what family is for, sis

-new note-

Haru: if you want to discuss, hm, reassignment procedures, with someone, I know Yusuke is rather open about his. He'll even give you his professional's number

Hifumi: why are you saying it that way?

Haru: Makoto has, a thing with. *Hospitals*. So, I tend to reword those things

-new note-

Makoto: I'll wake up early and make Haru breakfast in bed for our first mother's day, I'll have the little one strapped to my chest nothing can go wrong!

Hifumi: what happened to you

Makoto, sitting on the kitchen floor covered in flour and butter, her infant son playing with Johanna on the couch: I tried to cook with a baby. Help me please

Hifumi entertains the baby while Makoto makes a plate of scones, an omelette, and a little fruit salad for her wife

"I just get so distracted when he's with me. I lost all focus"

"yeah but the flour?"

"I was measuring it. Saw Seiji clap. So, I clapped."

"Ah."

Haru wakes up to her son giggling on Makoto's side of the bed, her wife tracing soft kisses up from her hand

"happy mother's day, baby"

"Happy mother's day, Love"

They both have the day off, and just spend a nice day with their lil guy

Haru: if this is mother's day, I wonder what you'll do for my birthday?

Makoto: ah, well Seiji won't be helping me with those plans. That'll be a very special night out, just us two. After a morning with his plans of course

Haru: I'm so lucky I have you,

Makoto: sjdbskdhxidbdj baby,,

-new note-

Makoto: happy birthday baby

Haru: you, bought that small building between us and the shop next door?

Makoto: let's go inside and you'll see your gift. Full home gym, with a little sauna and hot tub room in the back

Haru: ...not gonna lie Love this looks more like a gift for you

Makoto: did you notice the lounge chairs? This is a private show for you~ I know you hate coming to the gym to watch me, so-

Haru: I LOVE IT

Makoto: you can have a private showing whenever you'd like, baby. All for you

Haru: can we, have a go right now?

Makoto: of course. Are you okay with me working on arms and upper body?

Haru: YES

haru just in her lil lounge chair aggresively sipping water

cause shes thirsty

(green was Cap akfhdj)

Staring at the back muscles

Makoto has to wear a long sleeve shirt to her run with Ryuji the next morning. Normally she runs in the like, sports bra thing. But her arms, back, and abs are. Covered. From Haru enjoying her gift

Haru: I'm gonna kiss every muscle on you

Makoto: oh wow

Ryuji: whyre you wearing a shirt? You hate the sweat cling

Makoto: Haru's birthday yesterday

Ryuji: ...fuck I forgot to get her anything she's gonna kill me- wait. GROSS DUDE DONT TELL ME ABOUT-

Makoto: I DIDNT MAN STOP YELLING

Makoto and Haru at like a parents night for the preschool Seiji goes to just trying to ignore the straight gossip going around all around them

One couple: hehe we're trying to give her a sibling, trying for a baby is soooo much work

Makoto: ...they're just openly admitting they fu-

Haru: shh, Love. I know. Don't get too stressed though, you have to be in good health for our appointment tomorrow.

Makoto: think we should tell people we're also trying? But heavily imply we're just fu-

Haru: yes. Absolutely. Put your hand in my back pocket, I'll leave a little mark on your neck-

Makoto excitedly explains this at the appointment they go to the next morning, she's had to take those. Relax pills before so she's a lil loopy, and Haru just smiles so tenderly as they run the tests on her wife. She loves their little family,, so glad the medical field has a way for them to have kids (I'm making shit up idk man. Au magic this world made it possible I don't wanna think about it too hard)

Makoto: ...do you also find it weird we only have sons

Haru: shh don't think Love. Happy moment, no gender thoughts. Hold one of the twins, be mesmerized by the baby

Haru adores her wife and their sons so much. Even if their oldest turns emo and the twins are feral demons

Akira: when I first met you two you were getting the drunkest out of the group at every night out, dancing all over each other- I'm pretty sure you two were making out more than you weren't

Makoto: I remember our uni days, ha

Haru: mm, good times

Ann: you guys were. All over each other then

Haru: it was our first time getting to be open about us! It was exciting.

Makoto: we're just as all over each other now, we just know how to close doors

Ryuji: and DONT ACT LIKE YOU AND SHIHO DONT JUST MAKE OUT ON THE COUCH

Ann, three drinks in: you think that's all we do on that couch?

Yusuke: ...I think we need to sober her up before my roommates kill each other

Akechi, already grabbing the hose: on it

Ann and Ryuji, very wet the next minute:

Akechi: problem solved. Hey, lesbians. If you get too handsy you're getting sprayed next

Haru holds her hands up in the "don't shoot" position

Hifumi just sits to the side and drinks with Futaba, watching them all

Futaba: you want to stay on our couch tonight? Going home with Mrs and Mrs "Horny Drunk" won't lead to good things for your mental health

Hifumi: ...please tell me you're not speaking from experience

Futaba: me? No. Goro? Oh yes. Watching him be unable to look at either of them for four months was hilarious

Hifumi makes it back home around noon and notices only Makoto is in the house space

Hifumi: hey, where's Haru?

Makoto: hm? Oh, she's working downstairs. Want some tea? I can make you a plate of eggs?

Hifumi: Haru out drank everyone, how is she functioning?

Makoto: she's somehow immune to the hangover. Nah, I'm kidding. She drank water between every drink. Then it was the Gatorade and coffee mix, with a plate of my "Hangover Eggs". Neither of us have ever had a rough morning. Not since the first month of uni

Hifumi: ...I'll take a plate of the eggs, please

The day Haru finds out she's pregnant is. One of the best days in their household

She and Makoto had been having monthly appointments with their doctor over the last year, and. She'd felt off since the week after the last one but- she thought takin the test was wishful thinking

But the eight tests all read positive and- man she's gotta think of a way to tell Makoto

Before she gets a chance some dude tries to rob Noir's, barely nicks her with his knife but she goes to the hospital as a precaution cause tetanus

Makoto gets a call from one of the workers telling her her wife is at the hospital, they were robbed, and she gets there and is so relieved to see Haru looking alright, just some bandages around her arm, and Haru just Smiles

Eventually a doctor comes in to give Haru the all clear, but he pauses before they leave like: oh, and we did check. You're coming along just fine

Makoto: what does that mean?

Doctor: the pregnancy. Ms Okumura is early on, but all is going well

Makoto: ...it worked? Youre-

Haru: surprise?

Makoto is excitedly telling everyone for the next few months. Sure Haru was the one who wanted children more of the two, but that doesn't mean Makoto didn't want this. Her wife is pregnant! They're having a kid! And by some miracle, it's their kid

Ann: wait. How

Yusuke: but. You're on estrogen? There should be no way-

Ryuji: GROSS YOU GUYS DID IT?!

Shiho: ...Ryuji, stay on point here

Haru: science

Makoto: lesbian magic

Goro: I'm not watching your little spawn

Akira: dibs on godfather!

Futaba: in surprised you kept it a secret this long. Both of you suck at secrets

Makoto: no we don't

Haru: ...love you accidentally told me you were going to propose three days before you did it

They're much more open when they decide to go for a second kid, mostly because they're more convinced it'll work this time

Ryuji: gross

Ann: we already went over this. Science baby. Not like with straight people

Ryuji: but still

Makoto: you've known us for like ten years. How are you still like this

Ryuji: IDK YOU GUYS ARE LIKE THE PSEUDO MOMS I DONT WANNA THINK ABOUT YALL FUCKING

Makoto: so stop thinking about it?

Ryuji: ...oh.

Ann: DUDE SERIOUSLY

Then there's a bit about Ann and Shiho, how they decide to have a donor baby, and. End up with Triplets. Two daughters; Asami, Nikko. And then a son, Tsukito

Makoto: Seiji, turn off the TV, go play with the trio

Seiji: but mom, they're playing field hospital again. They're gonna make me the patient

Makoto: buddy, sometimes we have to make sacrifices. You and I will have a day to ourselves if you do it, okay?

Seiji: can we go to the farmers market?

Makoto: uh sure

Seiji has the red eyes but the twins are pure evil

Makoto: Kazu, Hiro, how did you get up there

The twins, literally on the roof: climbed

The twins have the like innocent Haru smile. Devious

There's cunning behind those eyes. They have the Niijima mind

Kazu: mom I don't feel good

Makoto: oh no, what happened- ...why is there a pencil in your arm

Hiro: hi mom

Makoto: ...both of you. What happened. Why are there pencils in your arms

Kazu and Hiro: we wanted to see if we could stab each other hard enough

Makoto: get in the car we're going to the hospital

Kazu: we're going on a hunger strike

Hiro: we want the bigger room. There's two of us

Seiji: I'm older. Nice try.

Kazu: we will make you give in

Hiro: I'm studying up on CIA torture tactics

Kazu: we both take martial arts. You will give us the room

Seiji: oh yeah? You think I won't survive? Try me

Makoto: baby the boys are waging war

Haru: eh, they're tire each other out. Feel up for a workout?

Makoto: HARU WE HAVE A PROBLEM

Haru, who was working the shop downstairs: Love? What's wrong

Makoto: I lost the babies

Haru: ...what

Makoto: I didn't think they'd figure out how to open the door i- baby the babies fucking got out-

Seiji: they're under the couch they just opened it and went under the couch

Makoto: what did we do to deserve this

Haru: I mean, we did fuck at a party and break the urn with someone's grandmother's ash's in uni

Makoto: oh yeah. And then we blamed Goro

Uni Makoto and Haru are just. A different breed. Them in high school was sweet, them after is domestic with a hint of spice, but. The in between.

They all go to the grand opening of Noir and. Just stare at how normal the two are

Ann: no visible hickies... It's a miracle

Akira: I can't believe it. They've been tamed

Haru: hi darling, think you'll lie on your stomach for me?

Makoto: ngh, wait, its-

Haru: don't think about it. We'll get your shot over with quick, and then we can have the day in bed. I promise. We took today off for a reason

Makoto: nooo I don't want it,

Haru: you're just saying that, you love you. You won't be the you you worked so hard for if you weren't brave enough for a little shot

Makoto: ...will it be quick?

Haru: I'll even numb the area with ice

Makoto: and we can kiss all day?

Haru: whatever you want

Makoto: fine. Give me the e,

Haru: you call me baby and yet,

Makoto: OW

Haru: that's the ice, Love

Haru: there, all done.

Makoto: did you use the

Haru: yes, I used the Buchimaru band aid

Makoto: I love you so much

Haru: I love you too

Makoto: kiss time?

Haru: I suppose~

Makoto later on: hey, thanks for not listening. I'm already feeling better

Haru: I know darling, it's hard to stab you sometimes but I know it's what makes my girl happiest

Makoto: mm,

Sae: since you two are going to be rooming together when you go off to uni, it's time I passed on the torch

Haru: oh?

Sae: Makoto is a coward about her hormone shots. No matter how much she says she doesn't want it, she does. Unless she has a serious conversation about detransitioning on a non shot day, don't listen. Give her a lollipop or something, anything else to focus on. She does best lying down. She can't kick you if you sit on her calves-

Haru: i- have you been doing this all this time?

Sae: yes. And now we will have the awkward experience of me helping you give her the shot. It'll be weird. But it'll be your responsibility as her partner

Haru: I'm ready, Chief

Makoto: hey, sis- Haru? Wait, no

Sae: yes. Pants off. Lie down.

Makoto: NO WAIT I CHANGED MY MIND I WANNA BE A GUY

Haru: will you lie down for me my Love?

Makoto: ...uh yeah

Sae: pants.

Makoto: bite me.

Sae: Makoto, you know this is what's best for you

Makoto: lies

Haru: I'll hold your hand if that helps? And give you a kiss after for being so brave?

Makoto: you're much more convincing than sis

Sae: alright Haru, that's it. You did it, congrats

Makoto: I'm dead. You killed me

Haru: you're rather attractive for a corpse

Sae: I'm leaving now. I'll bring home dinner. Don't do anything stupid

Hifumi: oh I do my own shots

Haru: my wife is just a big baby about them, and I mean that affectionately

Makoto: yeah I. Don't do well with anything of that sort

Haru: our fertility appointments are. Very planned. She takes one of those relaxation pills before we go

Makoto: it's tough but it's worth it for the chance to give Haru anything she desires

Makoto is the most doting wife while Haru is pregnant. Foot rubs, vitamins, skin creams and talking to their son every day

"today your mama gave your mom her shot. That's right, your mama shot me"

"Makoto-"

"just kidding kid. She helped me feel more like myself, and I love her so much. You've got the best mama ever"

"They have the best mom too"

Haru: ...Makoto?

Makoto: it's 2 am,, what is it baby?

Haru: I want. Cold soba noodles

Makoto: easy enough,

Haru: covered in chocolate

Makoto: ...

Slow dancing in the kitchen, Makoto behind Haru, hands entwined over Haru's dark apron, heads leaned together

Makoto: a night to ourselves,

Haru: Hifumi moved out a year ago, and the kids are staying at the Quad,, so it's just us

Makoto: shall we treat ourselves? I can make you steak? Break out the good wine? We can have a nice bath, turn in early for some, us time

Haru: can you make baked potato with the steak?

Makoto: anything for you

Haru: carry me to bed later?

Makoto: of course

Buff Makoto and her pudgy baker wife, And their emo chef son and two demon spawns

Thinking back to scared little high school Makoto, more scrawny than anything, and petite Haru seated beside her, their pinkies barely entwined, both blushing and looking away

To Uni them, with Makoto playing rugby recreationally and Haru being very much a fan of that, them making out and boinking literally anywhere possible, somehow like top of their classes while still going all out for the fun side of things

Makoto being very awkward with Haru's dad.

Kunikazu: so. You are. Transgender?

Makoto: yep.

Kunikazu: you want to be, a boy?

Makoto: w-wrong direction, sir

Haru: you can't do anything, father. I love her.

Kunikazu: I see

Makoto: ...can I go home? And hire a bodyguard?

Kunikazu: I suppose you two can live together. Just. I do not want a surprise grandchild

Haru: that's not even possible

Makoto: yeah I'm leaving

Haru: father and I will be having monthly brunch

Makoto: oh, joy,

Haru: just us. You're not invited

Makoto: ...did he-

Haru: I uninvited you

Makoto: I love you so much

Haru: no marks, I'm seeing my dad tomorrow! Makoto-

Makoto: but baby,

Haru: ...no visible marks at least

Makoto: ...fuck I forgot the rule

Haru: it's, well. I didn't try to stop you,

Makoto: your dad is gonna murder me

Haru: he won't, he likes you, he's just. Still in his learning phase

Makoto: yeah but you're gonna walk in tomorrow looking like a dalmatian

Haru inventing the Gatorade coffee in university after a night of. Heavy drinking with her girlfriend. Waking up and feeling like death itself and just. Trying to make coffee but she's barely looking and brews it with. Gatorade instead of water

Haru: I know you spoke to Yusuke, but Makoto gave me permission to tell you about her surgery experience

Hifumi: oh?

Haru: she had top, which I'm sure you've noticed by now. She likes to ditch the shirt more than usual

Hifumi: yes

Haru: but she had such a horrible time recovering she cancelled for bottom and just. Never got it

Hifumi: oh. And she's okay with that?

Haru: it works for her. Makoto's never been, violently dysphoric about her body. Not since I met her. Her voice was one thing, but now she's at her best

Hifumi: thank you for sharing, and tell her thanks too

Haru: of course! And let me know if you need someone for care afterwards or to drive you to and from

Haru dealing with miserable Makoto post op from top and just

Haru: my poor girl,

Makoto: I'm dying,,

Makoto: but at least I'll die with boobs,

Haru: okay let's give you some more pain meds, HEY DONT TOUCH, MAKOTO-

Makoto: ow,,,

Makoto: I just wanted to feel,

Haru: I know you and your hands, but give it some recovery time, please

Sae walking into Makoto's room during their first sleepover in high school and just. Seeing the two all curled up, the content looks on their faces, She sees Makoto stir and the minor look of horror on her face at getting caught by her sister but, Sae just smiles, whispers a loud goodnight, and turns back

Haru nuzzles closer, and Makoto just. Smiles.

Them watching Seiji in a school play and just trying not to fight the group of mom's at the back of the room who are chatting

Makoto: the disrespect-

Haru: Love his line is coming up, make sure the camera is on!

Makoto: wait, shit, where did the twins go?

Haru: ...we can worry about bailing them out later

Surprisingly that's it?? But one last joke Cap made that I felt I needed to share

"of course Makoto's trans her Persona is a Transformer"

[shipperoffanonships]

Title: Of Reconciliations and Realizations

Chapter: 1

Words: 628

Chapter 1: Endings and Beginnings

Chapter Text

"You're thinking of him. Again."

JJ, in the middle of slicing an onion, paused. Will was leaning against the counter. And he was not happy.

"What?" JJ said, genuinely confused.

"Don't 'what' me. You know damn well who I am talking about." Will snapped. His sentence made sense, and JJ glared at him.

"How many times do I have to tell you? Never mention Reid again, ever. He can die for all I care."

Will laughed. "Really. Then what, pray tell, are these?"

Out of his pocket Will pulled out several photos, slamming it down the marble countertop. JJ took it-and her eyes widened. It was her and Spencer. On one photo she was hugging Spencer from behind, her head resting on the doctor's shoulder. The second showed them standing back-to-back, arms crossed and eyes narrowed in a mask of mock-seriousness. But it was the third photo that made the blonde realize that, despite herself, despite their falling out, how much she missed him. In it JJ was tucked to Spencer's side, both of them smiling for the camera.

"I remember this." JJ murmured, more to herself. "He asked me out on a date the weekend after a particularly difficult case. Calmed and set me right, this one. How did you come across this?" 

"The more important question," Will countered, "is why you keep that. I thought you two were done."

"Whether or not I keep memorabilia about us is mine to decide. Reid and I may be enemies now, but platonically speaking, we had history." JJ snapped.

"Do you know how hard it was to quit?" Will hissed. Once again JJ was confused.

"Where does your job-"

"Do you know how hard it is to leave the force, not with where I was? After all I've done all those years to get where I was? I could have easily asked you to quit the BAU and move in with me, but I didn't. Because I know that as long as you're out there, Henry is safe. And now you'd rather mope about a ruined friendship, one that you ruined, rather than spend time with me? With Henry? This is how you repay my sacrifice?"

JJ rolled her eyes. "Sacrifice? Don't be so dramatic. If memory serves right, it was you, despite my insistence, that decided to play hero. And now you're pointing the blame at me?  From where I stand, you don't get the right to be whiny and resentful."

Will scoffed. "For all I know, you might be searching for him."

"No, but thanks for the advice." JJ grinned.

"Garcia, I need your help."

The tech analyst swiveled as JJ entered.

"Oh? And that request is to what?"

"Locate Spencer." JJ answered simply. 

"Locate who?" Garcia said. "What are you planning?"

"Something either idiotic or suicidal. Take your pick." JJ said.

Garcia's face turned serious. "You're going after him."

JJ nodded mutely.

"Girl, I may not know the specifics but I'm pretty sure he hates your guts, based on his farewell letters."

JJ winced. "Right, those. Just, look him up? It's high time I try to make things right with Reid."

Garcia shrugged. "On your own head be it.  Let's see... Right, so as of now, our dear Reid is now Dr. Spencer Reid, professor at Caltech. What?" Garcia asked as JJ huffed out a laugh.

"Nothing. Just something Spence told me." JJ explained, then paused. Spence. It had been years since she uttered her pet name for the doctor, and somehow it still felt natural.

"Where does Will stand in all of this?"

"Will can go f-" JJ took a deep breath. "We're on two different pages right now. Thank God Henry's still oblivious. Last thing I want is for it to get more awkward."

[mamadoc]

1, 2, 3, 34, 37, 40, 48, 49

1. What fic of yours would you recommend to someone who had never read any of your work? (In other words, what do you think is the best introduction to your fics?)

My two long multi-chapters have taken most of my writing time (and I love them), but I actually really love the first series I ever wrote, *Sense* You Know Me So Well. The second chapter of this series and the second chapter of its sequel are the two that I am most proud of. They just feel very authentic and have deep feelings.

2. Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits?

I'm not great at tagging apparently or my stories are all quite different. My only tag that I've used more than once was 'Alternate Universe,' which makes since given that 3 of my 6 are AUs.

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?

I really enjoy awkwardness. Perhaps that speaks to my own romantic history (haha), but I feel like I write awkward romantic scenes well. I love reading sexual tension; that's easily my favorite. But I guess I'll have to work on my skills in writing it.

34. What aspects of your writing are inspired by/taken from your real life?

Hmmm... Not much. I'm a doctor with 4 young kids who's been married for 18 years. Reeeeally doesn't match much of what I write. But I do have a couple ideas for short stories that would use a little bit more of my medical expertise.

37. Promote one of your own “deep cut” fics (an underrated one, or one that never got as much traction as you think it deserves!). What do you like about it?

I really love the story in chapter 2 of my *Sense* You Know Me So Well, Too series. Tim and Lucy are in the middle of the pining/not talking stage when Tim's dad dies. He doesn't deal with it well, and Lucy is the only one that can get through to him.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/50613028

40. Do you tend to reread fics or are you a one-and-done kind of person?

I reread my favorites for sure. Plus One by murphallo, Little Green by MeadowWard, Darling Let's Run by mooncpd, Unless It Is by adina_rachelle (@makeitastrength) are all favorites I've read at least two times each. But there are so many good stories out there (I think I have 60 tabs open of stories I want to read on my phone) that I don't reread often.

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it?

The Loophole by The Chandom. Amazing story. I highly recommend it.

49. What are you currently working on? Share a few lines if you’re up for it!

I'm working on chapter 17 of my Catch of a Lifetime story. Theoretically I was going to have it ready to post this weekend, but.... life.

When Lucy left the locker room on Sunday morning, Captain Andersen called her into her office.

“Good morning, Captain.  How can I help you?”

“First, I was happy to see you on the tabloid sites this morning,” she said with a smile.

Lucy furrowed her brow and opened her mouth to speak, but Captain Andersen put up her hand to indicate that she wasn’t done speaking yet.

“Not that I think that’s good journalism or that your privacy should be invaded like that,” she clarified.  “But I’m a bit of a romantic at heart, and I had a good feeling about you and Bradford from the moment I saw you two together. Even with the fuzzy photos that were taken, it’s obvious that you were happy to be with him last night.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Lucy said, her cheeks suddenly a fiery red, unsure if it was the right time to discuss personal matters like this.  “I am happy, ma’am.  Thank you,” she said with a small smile. She thought for a moment and then asked, “You look at the tabloids ma’am?”

Captain Andersen laughed. “Not usually. But the LAPD’s tech force keeps tabs on all the sources of news that they can. Usually they’re looking for criminal activity, but the posts about you and Mr. Bradford were a nice bonus.  I got an email this morning with all the links.”

“Oh.  That makes more sense,” Lucy said nodding her head.

“Well,” she started.  She shuffled some papers around on her desk and then looked up at Lucy. “That’s not exactly why I called you in. I have an assignment for you today, if you’re up for it.  It’s not exactly undercover work, and it’s not exactly an internal affairs investigation, but it’s a little bit of both.” 

Lucy was intrigued.  She tried to quickly put the other conversation behind her and smiled at the captain.  “Nice hook.  I’m totally in.  What’s going on?” She leaned her arms on her duty belt and focused on the captain.

“Close the door and take a seat,” she said, waving toward the door and walking around to the front of her desk.

Thanks for asking! I love your stories.

[zaeliaeve]

Flores [sergio ramos] CHAPTER 2

DISCLAIMER: This is 100% fiction and things will be inaccurate to real life. Any Spanish used is through Google Translate so my apologies if it's bad. 

-

2009

One week had come and gone. Catalina saw the reminder of her first day every time she looked in the mirror, the now yellowish bruise that rimmed against her left eye was a reminder of her poor reflex time.

Catalina had taken it upon herself to study each member of the squad, matching the teams' names to their faces. To make it a bit easier, she made a game of it. All of her mother's printer paper was gone as she printed each face out and handwritten the players' names one by one on small pieces of paper.

All twenty-six members laid in duly colored ink paper sprawled across her carpet floor.

Mr. Buzzcut who gave me the ice pack. Catalina laid the name 'Benzema' over the bald-headed man.

The other one with a buzzcut who has great aim and a strong kick   'Pepe' written in pink marker pen was placed over the photo.

When Catalina's dark eyes scanned over to the next photo, her lips curled down slightly. The long-haired defender who thinks I'm a complete idiot. It didn't take her long to seek out 'Sergio Ramos' in the pile and place the name over his face.

Catalina shrieked with embarrassment when she remembers herself getting smacked in the head with a ball in front of everyone and covers her face with her palms in an attempt to stop thinking about it.

Tomorrow was a chance for redemption. Real Madrid had their first official match of the season which was a big deal because the team was boasting a few new players, the most notable being Cristiano and Kaka. Naturally, with some of the biggest names in football, all eyes were on the Spanish team which added another layer of pressure.

The team was in a somewhat awkward growing stage of trying to figure each other out and gain chemistry, which luckily they had a good amount of organically. In an attempt to for team bonding, the staff invited them over to their dining hall to have dinner together before the season starts tomorrow.

Catalina wasn't quite sure why she was invited but took the invite nonetheless. It seemed to be a somewhat formal dinner, so she made an attempt to look presentable which was hard with yellow and purple still staining over her eye.

The hall had been transformed into a dimly lit atmosphere, with candles and red flowers decorating different thick white tablecloths in the middle of the room. Catalina was happy to have bumped into her uncle on the way in so they walked into together the room together,  easing some of the social anxiety that was screaming from her psyche.

She felt out of place watching these well-accomplished people filing into one room. There were world-class athletes, managers, and coaches whom she felt she didn't deserve to be around. Suddenly her thoughts got louder and harsher, distracting her from listening to her uncle's conversation with a manager about the upcoming season. Not wanting to cause any attention to herself, Catalina chose an empty table to set her purse down on as she took in deep breaths.

The fluffy cushion underneath her felt comforting as she leaned her elbows on the cloth table, in an attempt to feel something cool against her skin. "¿Estás bien?" A voice came from above, a careful hand on her back.

Catalina pulled her head up from her lap and breathed in heavily to be met with caring brown doe eyes and large furrowing brows. Instantly she knew his name from her flashcard game, Kaká.

"Yes, I'm just overwhelmed from the heat. I'm not used to it being this hot in August. Thank you though" She put on a big grin to assure him that she was alright, and he seemed to accept her answer.

Kaká nodded and slipped his hands off of her back and into his pockets. "How's my Spanish though? Could I convince you that I'm a true Madridista?" his tone was light-hearted and playful to ease the mood, a smile creeping onto his lips.

Catalina kept her smile, but this time it was genuine. "You are a true Madridista. You could never pass as a Spaniard, though. You have too many World Cups for that"

The chair squeaked under Kaká's weight as he sat next to her. "I only have one" Kaká told her, both of their bodies now at an even eye level in their seats.

"Exactly" A teasing giggle escaped past her pink glossed lips.

Kaká let out a small chuckle and kept his eyes focused on her. "I didn't catch your name at practice last week" he noted, causing Catalina to cringe internally at the memory of her first day.

Ignoring her face probably flushing red with embarrassment, she stuck her hand out to him. "I'm Catalina"

He seemed surprised by the gesture yet still took her hand into his with ease, shaking it slowly up and down "I'm Ricardo, but they call me Kakà"

"You're healing up well after your attempted assassination attempt by Pepe, Catalina" Karim's voice appeared from behind her, clearly having just learned her name from her current conversation.

Catalina looked Karim in the eyes and pointed to the obvious bruising on her face. "I don't know if healing up well is the right word" she laughed, earning a snicker from Karim.

One by one, each of the remaining empty seats got filled. Kakà stayed sat to her left, while Karim ended up sliding to her right which in turn drew in Sergio and Marcelo. When Sergio sat next to Karim, Catalina's heartbeat picked up once again. The girl tried everything within her power to keep her eyes focused away from the right side of the table. Why does he intimidate me so much?

Kakà was kind in speaking with Catalina, asking where she was from and how she got into photography. Catalina felt her breathing slow a bit when she got lost in the story Kakà was telling about his life in Brazil, capturing her attention fully; easing her mind off of the somewhat scary Spaniard.

The nicely dressed waitress offered a selection of salmon or chicken to each of the hungry members in the hall. Catalina turned her head to thank the waitress as she set a full glass of water down in front of her, catching a glimpse of Karim tapping Sergio to get up from his seat.

Karim and Sergio switched seats as Karim played a video to Marcelo off of his phone, leading the defensive player to be sat next to Catalina. "I told you! It was absolutely a foul! look at the way his leg moves over the line!" Karim shrieks to the curly-haired Brazilian, slapping his finger against the small screen.

Marcelo shakes his head at the younger player "They must be slipping acid into your water when you aren't looking, his leg didn't even move an inch." 

The Frenchman groaned in disbelief and hit the pad on his phone to rewind to prove his point further. Sergio now took the opportunity to crane his neck to get a peek at the footage.

"Catalina?" Kaká snaps her out of her trance of listening to the pair.

He held her hot plate of salmon in his hand since it was in an awkward place for the waiter to reach. Catalina jumped to take the steaming plate out of Kaká's hands, not thinking about full the glass of water to the right side of her.

Within a split second her elbow bumped into the glass, causing the cool water to splash directly into Sergio's lap. The defender winced at the sudden freezing sensation and stood up, the liquid now leaving a dark stain on his pants. His darkened eyes met Catalina's, her jaw dropping at the mistake she made.

Catalina's brain racked itself in an attempt to find the right words to say but when she felt his unwavering gaze on her, everything she knew washed away. All she managed to get out were useless stutters before grabbing a cloth napkin at the table and offering it to him with an unsteady hand. "I'm so so sorry that was a complete accident, I really didn't mean to do that" She flushed, her cheeks undeniably red now.

Sergio huffed and left her hand hanging as he grabbed another napkin off of the table in front of him "Las mujeres con derechos no pueden hacer nada bien, ¿verdad?" 

Catalina's frown deepened at his harsh words, but decided to not say anything else for fear of upsetting him worse. The accident caught the attention of everyone else at the table, all eyes now on the Spaniard. "Relax Sergio, it's just water. It'll dry" Kaká chimed in, his face completely dropping into a serious one, eyes narrowing. 

"It does look like you peed your pants though" Karim jokes in an attempt to lighten the sudden shift in mood.

Sergio rolls his eyes and storms out of the room, causing the rest of the table to fall silent. Tears prick Catalina's eyes as she rubs her temples. How do I mess everything up?

Karim leans forward to Catalina and shakes his head like it's no big deal. "That's just how Sergio is. I promise it isn't as bad as you think it is" he assures the visibly distressed girl.

Kaká's hand finds her upper back again in his way to show comfort. Not too long after that, Catalina makes up an excuse to go home and crawl under her heavy blankets. For the rest of the night, all she does is replay the moment over and over again in her mind. A heavy weight of guilt stays with her as she pictures his eyes glaring into hers. 

Sergio's words stayed with her long after the moon had left. The worst part is, is she completely understood where he was coming from. That didn't mean it hurt any less though. At some point in the early morning, her brain wore itself out and she drifted off into a deep sleep.

Much to Catalina's surprise, the next day was a lot better. It was her first time shooting pictures in the big stadium, and it went by without a hitch. She and another photographer stood on opposite sides of the pitch and captured all the most important moments. 

Real Madrid was on fire, all their hard work from practice paying off in a big way. Their chemistry translated just as well on the field as off, prompting their first win of the season. The stadium was packed to the brim, and the buzz of watching the new players added an extra element of excitement for the fans. 

Catalina didn't have much time to focus on the events of yesterday as she watched the match, intoxicated by the infectious energy the team exuded. She got some really great shots that couldn't wait to send to her boss, hopeful this will capture that the new Real Madrid team was a force to be reckoned with. 

When the match was over, a sweaty Kaká jumped on her with one of the widest smiles she had seen. "We're winners, pollita" he cheered drunk with happiness. 

Catalina returned his smile and wrapped one arm around him, the other holding her camera bag. "I'm so proud of you guys" 

"We're proud of you" he repeated back sincerely, still gripping onto her for dear life.

She smiled into his neck and held him a little tighter, needed to have heard those words. Soon another body toppled onto them and nothing else mattered anymore. The team had won, and ultimately the most important thing.

For now, she can ignore the stinging in her chest.

-

A/N: I really wanted to make this a slow burn, but I feel like maybe that bores some people. Thoughts on slow burn books?  Also, I promise Sergio isn't all evil! He does have a heart underneath all the hard exterior. All comments are welcome and deeply appreciated! Thank you for reading!

[penname-artist]

Some Ideas: Rey & his Music Albums

Pre-note: these were generated by an ai (I honestly forget which sites, because I scrolled through a few of those free ones)

Also, this is for an OC and they're not really albums, as badly as I wish they were (I mean unless someone can make music really well lol)

I wanted to create a few "aesthetics" and random ideas to use as album covers for Reyzor C's music. I'm planning to probably either recreate these images as my own art (and I do mean literally, from-the-ground-up on FireAlpaca recreate) or splice them together with other things and do some heavy-ass personal tweaking to make it into. Well. What I want it to be.

I've actually gone so far in giving Rey's musical career life as to create three full lists of song titles for all of his albums, so all of these images are connected - either to the albums themselves or to the titles (and don't ask why some of them are what they are, man, just, lemme drown in my aesthetic juice okay?)

For his first album, "Artificial", I had a few cover ideas, but this one feels like the most fitting:

and this is the song list within that first album:

1. Artificial

2. Xoxo

3. Hollow Hearted

4. Wasn't Gonna Say

5. Crisis Line

6. Give Me a Week

7. Getaway Car

8. Isn't That What Lovers Do

9. Keysmash

10. Breather

11. Visions

12. Waiting List

Though I didn't generate images for any of these songs in the first listing, I definitely have plenty of ideas for lots of them. I think Keysmash in particular would be a gritty picture of a keyboard someone threw into the dirt, maybe with flowers idk (flowers are a slightly recurring theme you'll soon notice)

I do have a pic I could fit in with Breather though since it feels somewhat in line with it. Please ignore that this bird is missing half a leg. Or don't, maybe it's meant to.

Next is the album cover idea behind his second one, "Pedestal", which I won't lie to you I debated as being the cover for Artificial, but I like them this way just a teeny bit more. This image has a nice lighting and retro vibe to it. Like an 80's roller skating rink floor.

And here's the list of songs for Pedestal;

1. Pedestal

2. Mixed Signals

3. Tunnel

4. Highway Blues

5. Vending Machine

6. Just Like Last Time

7. Is This Love

8. Fake a Smile

9. Trainwreck

10. Escapism

11. Don't Kiss Me Goodbye

12. Trial

13. Empty Skies

14. Supernova

I actually tried to get some decent ai photos for Vending Machine, but unfortunately they never felt quite right - usually the ai put it in the middle of a walkway and it was just kinda awkward so, eh. This was the best I was able to do with it:

I thought that this one was really neat, and kinda trippy. It looks like it belong in a Melanie Martinez song (which like, not complaining here, but yknow). It'd probably fit best with Escapism.

I think Don't Kiss Me Goodbye, whether Rey wanted it to be or not, would be his swan song, that thing he's best known for. And this may not be the cleanest fit (actually it's one of the weakest) for an art cover with that song, but I think that catches the fact that this was an afterthought song Rey didn't think was gonna blow up.

Honestly not sure where this one would fit best, as it's more of an idea for the cover of Artificial that I just wanted to keep because I like the theme and the vibe it emits. Might go well with Trial, it feels kind of dangerous-y and on the edge.

Next up is the third and most recently constructed album titles, and that is "Gravesinger" - does it feel like Rey's songs have a line of evolution yet? Cuz I was going for that.

Corpse

2. Six down

3. Fall

4. Might be

5. Hell’s happy hour

6. Existential Cryptid

7. Pie

8. X-rey

9. Body count

10. Born (and born and born)

11. Memory lane

12. Aries

13. The Fortune Teller

14. Infinity Wheel

15. Seafoam

Corpse is probably one of those songs that's way lighter and more whimsical than the title lets on, so I want to pair it with this image of a knight and flowers to give that vibe of something quietly rotting away.

Now. Pie was one of those names I just...I just wanted it, okay? For personal silly reasons I wanted it. And I did make a matching personal silly prompt:

Actually, I made two!

I think I like the second one better but the first one is still very fun.

Then there's Memory Lane, which I wanted to put this cool ocean wave picture on, since it feels similar to that retro vibe from the previous two albums (I think I used the same bot base "style" iirc)

Being the last song in his last (presumable) album, Seafoam is likely a song of Rey's response to the resounding success that was Don't Kiss Me Goodbye and his own mixed emotions surrounding it. As such, their covers are similar.

Aaaaand that's all I managed to get in, but I might go back and make more of these to slap on the song titles. Hell, maybe I'll even make the lyrics for them one day. Or figure out how to make music on the computer, idk. That's probably kind of a stretch given I know jack shit of music. Oh well.

Anyways enjoy the aesthetics!

[darksideofparis]

Thought I'd share this snippet from when I did The End of Time with my Time Lady OC, Gazelle. How will this funny little scene play out with the OCs of yours that will be present for that story? I can imagine that some of them won't be too happy about Minnie getting so handsy with the Doctor!

"Ooh, but you never said he was a looker." Minnie remarked, eyeing the Doctor.

"And what about her?" Oliver added, eyeing Gazelle. "She's gorgeous!"

"Take a photo!" Minnie said, handing him a camera and squeezing up next to the Doctor, who looked very uncomfortable as the rest of the Silver Cloak apart from Wilfred all squeezed up beside him.

"Me next!" Oliver grinned. "I want one with her!" He pointed to Gazelle, who looked very flustered.

"I'm Minnie." Minnie said to the Doctor. "Minnie the Menace. It's a long time since I had a photo with a handsome man." And she squeezed up uncomfortably close to the Doctor.

"Just get off them." Wilfred said to his friends, seeing how uncomfortable the Time Lords were with the attention "Leave 'em alone."

"Hush, you old misery." Minnie waved him off. "Come on, Doctor, give us a smile." She pinched the Doctor's cheeks, making him give a grimacing smile.

"Hold on." Oliver pressed a button on the camera. "Did it flash?" "No, there's a blue light." Minnie told him. "Try again."

"Oh, I'm all fingers and thumbs."

"I don't wanna be rude, but we're kind of in the middle of something important." Gazelle tried to get them out of this awkward situation

"Oh, it won't take a tick." Minnie waved her off. "Keep smiling." Her hand slid down the Doctor's back to his arse.

"Is that your HAND Minnie?!" the Doctor flinched as Minnie goosed him.

"Good boy." Minnie smirked, giving him a pat on the arse.

Lol, I daresay there will be some of my OCs that won't be happy with Minnie! Off the top of my head, the ones who would find it humorous would probably be Iliana, Shareen, and Ava. I can see Lulu being jealous, Abby being disapproving and politely but firmly removing Minnie's hand, while Julia would just be like, "uh, what?!". But we'll have to see how that scene plays out with them!

[butch-reidentified]

I don't regret my top surgery.

The argument last night had me thinking about this and I don't think I've ever discussed it here, so I'd like to open up the conversation.

Most of you know I'm some form of detrans, but I've never really gone into much detail on that. I think my story is a bit different from most I've read on radblr, and I'm hoping that in sharing it, perhaps I can hold space for others who have felt hesitant to share their "outside the radblr norm" detrans stories.

When I was about 7 or 8, I was wearing a plain forest greet skater dress and sneakers on a tiny island in the middle of a lake near where I grew up. I was doing what I loved most - climbing trees, exploring outdoors, playing childhood fantasy games in my head. I ran into some kids about my age who spotted me on a tree branch and asked me if I was a boy or a girl. I recall feeling sort of floored in that moment. I'd never thought about it before, and for whatever reason, I didn't feel confident in my response. I said "both."

In middle school, all of my friends were masculine, socially awkward tomboys. Some were on the swim team, big and muscular, some on the robotics and mathletes teams, dorky and unashamed of it. None shaved any body hair, and it wasn't a statement - by 7th grade none of us had even realized we were expected to yet. All of them were taller, bigger, heavier, more masculine-looking than I was. None wore makeup or remotely sexy outfits or even did their hair. I shaved my legs, experimented with makeup, tried to look hot. I was by far the most "feminine" of my friend group in terms of body type alone. So why did I feel so out of place and disorientingly masculine around them despite those things? I felt like the Hulk trying to hang with preteen girls. It didn't make sense. I doubled down on learning to perform femininity. My friends never did.

My first year of college, I was exposed to the concept of gender identity for the first time. I thought it was silly, but I kept quiet in public. In private, I mocked it with my then-partner. But then, my second year of college, I started listening more closely - to the trans kids on campus and to myself. I remember being at my ex's parents house for winter break, gathering up my long hair and cramming it all under a beanie, layering tight sports bras and borrowing her brother's sweater. I felt giddy. I took the first photo of myself I ever liked. I cut my hair.

For a time afterward, I called myself nonbinary. Maybe genderfluid? I wasn't sure, I told people. I wasn't sure, and while I felt okay about it, it wasn't changing any of the other negatives in my life in any way. I tried to show off my chest, knowing it was an especially symmetrical and conventionally beautiful one. I didn't mind it being seen, but any touch was agonizing. I kept my shirt on in the bedroom to discourage partners from touching.

Over time my nonbinary identity faded to the back of my mind (it's now clear to me that I only labeled myself as such because I felt like I was supposed to if I had dysphoria). People still used they/them pronouns for me, but I no longer felt any need to label myself with a gender identity, let alone pronouns. The feeling in my chest never faded at all. I began researching top surgery. Out of curiosity, I insisted. But I was saving every spare penny. In pre-pandemic January of 2020 I had a consultation with Dr. Charles Garramone. I picked a date and paid the fee to hold the date. I still wasn't sure. I hated how my breasts felt on my body, but I loved how they looked. I didn't identify as a man or anything at all. Just me. I couldn't relate to anyone in top surgery forums.

I went back and forth often over the 7 months between the consultation and the surgery. I'm a woman, I thought. I love how my body looks in the mirror. I'm happy and confident in myself. So why do I still want to do this? Why does it still feel like there's a prosthetic duct-taped to my chest? Won't it be weird to be a masculine, boobless woman? My mom told me I would regret it. I told her regret isn't in my personality - I've always looked at the bright side of things. I have no use for regret. You can't change the past, so if you don't like the past, you can either ignore it or find a way to spin it positively. As it turns out, I didn't need to do either of those.

I woke up on 8/11/2020 almost $11,000 poorer and a few pounds lighter. I didn't have a chance to see anything for about a week, and at that point I had too much skin irritation from bandages and adhesives to get a good look. But as I started to heal, I aso began feeling happiness and relief. Despite my genetic health concerns and premature removal of my compression bandage, my scars healed thin and subtle.

I still wear a shirt almost every time I swim... partly because it feels right and partly because I just don't like sunscreen. I don't run around topless, though it's kind of cool that I legally can. It's a fun feeling. Everyone should be able to do that legally and without being sexualized. But what mattered most to me was not in activity or appearance but in sensation. At first, I experienced phantom sensations, but as my nerves rewired, that and the "prosthesis duct taped on" feeling began to quickly fade. I loved touching my chest and having my chest touched. I still do.

I am a little bit happier, a little more at ease. I don't have that uncomfortable sensation lingering on my mind pretty much ever anymore. Sometimes, I'm mistaken for a man. I often say hello to women in the restroom to ensure they know I'm female. Beyond that, I've experienced no negatives. I liked my body before and I like it now, though I rarely even take it into consideration at all. In general, unrelated to the surgery, I'm incredibly happy with everything in my life. It's very rare for me to feel down or insecure.

I don't have any regrets about it, and to be 100%, fully honest, I would do it again (it helps that I had constant and severely painful breast cysts as well). It isn't something I would encourage willy-nilly, but I believe I did things the right way for me. I abandoned gender identity and embraced my womanhood long before I had the surgery. I put a couple of years between the last time I experienced body image issues and receiving this procedure. I worked through any trauma history intensively for several years with an absolutely incredible, almost witch-like therapist. I had no mental health diagnoses by the time of my surgery. I read endless detrans regret stories to determine whether I related to any beforehand.

Over a half decade of thought, precautions, and emotional work went into this choice for me, and THAT is what I want to stress. I learned from other detransitioners and desisters BEFORE I went ahead with surgery. I addressed any potential mental health concerns well in advance with a top tier therapist and the express goal between us of determining my readiness and ability to make such a significant decision. I don't think it is realistic to try to eliminate such surgeries entirely. But what I do believe in is fighting to make sure that the people who are getting them have done the work and are truly in a place where they're equipped to make that choice. What worries me is how many people go from "discovering their gender identity" to having major cosmetic surgery within a year or so, or those who go into surgery under the influence of extreme gender fanaticism without taking any time to critique and analyze.

I know many radfems would do anything to eliminate these surgeries entirely, and I love and respect those who feel that way, but that's never going to be me. I don't know why I had the sensations I did in my chest, and I don't know why surgery helped. I can guess - maybe something do to with the fact that I already have problems with my nervous system's wiring? But guessing is the best I've got. What I do know with absolute certainty is that no part of me regrets it, and I'm not interested in hiding that truth for any reason, person, or agenda. I am a whole woman, and a pretty badass one at that. I'm killing it in my career, starting a business with my wife, and committing nearly all my spare time to activism, kindness, and community service. I love every part of me, as I am right now and as I was before.

[kkusuka]

HQ Middle blocker kinks <3

@xxxxtanaxxxx​ request  hq kinks but middle blocker version please 🥺

I'm gonna be honest i wasn't gonna do this buuut here it is 

i have a setter one in the works and here is the ace version!

here is the setter version <3

Characters:  Tsukishima Kei, Kuroo Tetsuro, Suna Rintaro, Satori Tendo, Taichi Kawanishi, Issei Matsukawa,  Takanobu Aone,, Shoyo Hinata, Lev Haiba Shugo Meian (MSBY captain), and Yutaro Kindaichi

Mentioned female anatomy, but mostly gn

content warning: consensual non-con, humiliation, public sex, exhibitionism, voyeurisms, degradation, bondage, sex toys, cockwarming, edging, soft priamal/prey, mentions of house break-ins, pegging, size kink, overuse of the word Daddy, face fucking, hickeys

i think thats all? 

buckle up, this is gonna be looooong.

Tsukishima Kei

Degradation

This is a given, my mans has a mouth on him, AND HE KNOWS HOW TO USE IT

He says the most vulgar things in your ears (and you love it)

His nickname for you is Cum-dump, and he calls you that so much that you’ve started to respond to it. “Hey, Cum-dump! Come here” “ok Tsukki”

And when he’s cumming? A slew of insults just come out

“You whore, oh, you fucking cum-slut, you’d let anyone do this to you won't you”

And it's not limited to this!

“You're just a hole”

“You only exist for me to fuck, Right? You're just a glorified fleshlight”

“You're only good for sucking my cock”

“I should just leave you chained to the wall so I can fuck you anytime I want, that's all you're good at so you should love it”

It won’t even be only during sex

You could literally be just studying with him and he’ll just lean over and say “ you want to be fucked right now don't you? In front of all these people, I bet you’d love it Cum-dump”

Humiliation

Goes with a dirty mouth

He’ll flip your skirt while walking in front of groups of other students

He purposely sucks hickeys where your uniform does not cover and then laughs at you because you're just such a slut.

One of his favorite things to do is have you wear a vibrator in school, only on days where you have to do something in front of the class

No worries he has the remote and turns it alllllll the way up during the middle of your presentation, you just look so cute all red!

He’ll make it better!!

You can cum in front of the class, let everyone know how much of a whore you are!

Purposeful neglect

He wants you so horny you can’t think

If that means not giving you attention for FIVE DAYS so be it.

No touching yourself and if he finds out you did he’ll ignore you for longer and you don’t want that do you?

You will wait for him to touch you.

He’ll also just ignore you.

No begging, he doesn't care, he doesn't want to hear it.

Don't touch him, stop being a brat or you won’t get off for a whole week.

Bondage

It's all about control <3

Having you tied up and immobile is the best way to show how little you are.

He’ll tie you up and put you on the couch with a vibrator and just watch movies, unable to rock your hips

This seems cruel but he’ll tie your hands up and make you eat dinner with just your mouth <3

He’ll make you watch tv with a ball gag in

He’ll have a riding crop in his hands when you study and he’ll hit your little clit/silt with it every time you get a question wrong

Kuroo Tetsuro

Pet names

Literally any kind o endearment, but mainly switches between Kitten and Baby Girl/Boy(i am swooning right now)

He WILL call you these in front of people and out loud in public

He’s called you them in front of your parents in front of Kenma in the middle of the grocery store.

So you're wondering, why does that matter? People do that all the time!

Well, he calls you them so you remember how he completely ruined your little body and how his cum is still dripping out of you <3

And its cannon that he has a sexy voice, and it drops and gets deeper when he calls you them.

Thigh highs

It doesn't matter in you have the biggest thighs ever or just a bone, if you wear any kind of thigh highs (bonus points for Cat ones) he will be ready to bust a nut

It's not only him that gets off on them, especially when he takes them off

He’ll climb over you and use his teeth to pull them down to your feet and he’ll kiss and bite his way back up to do the other one.

He also will sometimes leave them on to rail you into your bed, when this happens he puts your legs over your shoulders and squishes his head between them.

(kuroo loves thighs, and that's that)

Caregiver

He's taken care of Kenma all his life, and you bet your ass he’ll do it for you

This means he gives the best aftercare you could imagine, I’m talking bubble baths

He’ll cook for you in nothing but an apron, and he’ll tease you when you get all flushed and cute!

You had a bad day? He’ll eat you out for hours until you’re all cuddly and tired.

He’ll fuck you slow where you need it and he’ll kiss all the pain away <3

He just loves having you dependent on him makes him so happy and thankful to have you!

Threesomes

Mainly for Kenma, but he let bokuto have a turn and even convinced Tsikki to give it a try!

He really just wants to show off that you’re his what better way to show you off then let some of them get a taste of something they’d never have.

Favorite position for this? Split roasting/ Eiffel towering

He's the one who you're sucking on, and he’s so far down your throat making him suck you deeper and deeper until you’re drooling all over his balls like a good Kitten

Whoever he sharing you with would be in you following whatever Kuroo tells them to do

Rub your clit? Yes Sir.

Faster. Yup

Slowdown Kittens being bad so she doesn't get to get off <3

Suna Rinatro

Purposeful neglect

Just like Tsukki, he wants you hot and bothered all the time

He will just sit around and scroll on his phone while you’re whining :(

Just let him watch this video and he’ll get you off!

Will never tell you but you just look so cute, all needy and horny for him.

Sometimes he’ll slip you a libido pill and just watch the world burn.

He will wait until you have ruined whatever shorts you’re wearing (and he’ll take them) and THEN he will help his poor needy baby

Cockwarming

Almost every time he games, he puts you on his dick

you already know it’s happening when he takes the controller out

He says it's because he doesn't want to “leave you out”

No moving on him though, if you8 move it could distract him and you do not want him to lose, losing means being pounded into the floor until you can't think, then being ignored the rest of the day “horny sluts can sit on the floor until they need to be used”.

But if all goes well, he’ll go soft in between rounds and will suck on your neck and will let you cuddle into him during the rounds

But when Suna if feeling a bit more adventurous he will put his headset on you and fuck you with all of his friends listening

And if that's not bad enough they all clearly know what’s happening id Osamus soft coo’s and Gin’s little comments (but it's not like they want it to stop anyway)

Edging

Will literally just do this out of nowhere

You thought you were finally gonna cum, then nothing

HE WILL just do things for hours to see you cry and begging or him to just let you cum

He’ll stick four fingers in you and bring you to your climax and just leave you on the edge

He won't even have a reason, you were being good, you let him play his game and he does this?

Que pouty bby

Video/Photography

We all saw this coming-

But he takes it a step further than just having a photo collection of you

He has a personal private story with just you in it where he put videos of you riding him or sucking his dick fo you to “see how slutty you are”

 that's not even it,  he sends you a picture of you naked in the middle of work, with no shame either

Thus one time you were showing a coworker a shirt you had bought and he texted you and the picture showed up. It was awkward for the next few days.

But these don't even compare to how he has an entire Instagram account (private of course) of your nodes and videos of the two of you fucking.

One extra little thing is that you both watch porn together for ideas.

Satori Tendou

(i could make him a post of his own-so so many kinks for Satori)

Humiliation (mentions of pee)

This can range from calling you names to making you touch yourself in public

He’s called you a pillow princess in the middle of class, in front of your teacher

It had gotten so bad they Ushijima had to ask what a “cum-dumpster was” because Satori had called you that in front of the team.

He doesn't even introduce you as his S/O, hw=e would call you an escort or that you were just his personal fuck toy.

This kink goes so far that when you were on a double date with Semi, under the table Tendo had his hand literally in your pants.

**One of his favorite things is to make you hold your pee in until you are almost peeing yourself, isn't that embarrassing that you're a grown adult who’s about to wet yourself?

Overstimulation

He wants to see you a complete mess all over him

The main goal of all of this is to make you squirt or begin to have dry orgasms

He will not stop until he’s happy or you say your safe word (which is rare)

One orgasm just isn't enough for him :/

And it's a big boost of confidence for him!

he‘s proud to know he can make you cum so much you cant even think!

Dacryphilia

This AND overstim?

Good luck

He can't even explain why it turns him on so much.

You just look so beautiful with tears streaming down your face all fucked out

It always hits him at the worst times too, you crying over a bad grade? A pretty tear falling over your soft cheeks. Hard.

Just watched a sad movie, he’s ready to pound you into the couch.

Anal

Oh ho ho

This can be one of two things, he does it because it feels good

OR

He does it as punishment

That means no lube

No adjusting to his dick

And no extra pleasure to help you get off

He’s so mean </3

Taichi Kawanishi

This man screams pornstar

Public sex

This man is unstable

You could just be walking in public and he just decides he wants to fuck.

Who are you to stop him?

Just let him get this out real quick you can shop later.

Exhibitionism

The thought of being in the open? This man loves it

And you don't really have a choice but to love it

Every time you go to the beach he just has his dick in you, in the ocean sitting in his lap while eating lunch

He doesn't even care who sees

Children? Who cares, look away or whatever

Getting caught

It doesn't even matter who it is

If someone walks in when you're doing it he’s cumming

It's just hot

He doesn't need to explain it to you

he also makes u take nudes and had them as his homescreen for a while

Issei Matsukawa

I’d let this man kill me-

Leather/ latex

LEATHER GLOVES

He wears them when he fingers you so he can make fun of how wet you made them.

He dresses you up in these pretty little pastel dresses (gender to heel, he doesn't care, you look hot weather your a boy, girl, or not) and he wears all black (goth daddy Mattsun) and his gloves to fuck you in his leather-covered fist.

That's not even it

He has an entire bin of different colored chokers and leashes just for his pretty baby

Along with that, he has a shelf of latex thigh highs for you to wear and even has an entire outfit for you to wear and show off to him.

Ddlg/b/n-Lifestyle

This is why he has a lot of things that you wear!

He loves to take care of you all the time!

He loves to make his baby food and love to watch movies with you

And you love him so much too!

You would do anything for Daddy!

And he takes you shopping and to restaurants, and if you want literally anything big or small all you have to do is look up at him with puppy dog eyes and a “Daddy, please!!” and boom his credit card is already out.

Size kink

Big dick Mattsun-

This all comes back to the fact that you are so beautiful

And big dick little hole, who doesn't love that??

He sure does, don't worry though he always makes sure to prep you

Except if it's punishment- he doesn't like it he swears! He’d never want to hurt you!

And you’d believe it until your crying on his cock and it throbs ://

But if it still hurts, and it does, he’ll let you go your pace and sink all the way down onto his cock<3

Fun fact the first time he went into your ass he tried to with no lube and you couldn't sit for DAYS

Voyeurism (receiving)

Makki Makki Makki

I would say he was into Cuckolding but its always him doing the watching while Issei fucks you

And Makki loves it too if his constant praises and coo’s said anything about it.

And Mattsun just gets off on the fact his best friend is watching something he’ll (maybe if you're not into it) never fully have

Mattsun also likes having you tied up an watching him fuck a fleshlight of just jerking off

You look so pathetic :)

extra for big dick mattsun, he Shows all of his friends <3

I am a whore for the Seijoh 4

You bet Makki has an entire folder of pic of you, whether they are of you dripping cum or just with your legs open.

Even if he says he doesn't save them, you know Iwa has gotten off you a recording of you moaning and asking for Daddy’s cock

And Oikawa is always asking for more (the little manwhore), he says they are “references” for him, liar, he jerks off to them in his bathroom.

Takanobu Aone

It's always the quiet ones-

I just gotta get these first two out-

Consensual non-con

I can just TELL he like to pretend to break into your house

Pretend you're so scared and you don't like it

Tying you up and listening to your little cries, awwwwweeee

You were just too pretty to ignore

Just let him have a taste, stop crying he knows you want it just as much as he does

Primal/prey

He wants to feel like he earned his reward

A perfect little trophy for him to use as a toy

His dick in your tiny dripping hole is all the reward he needs

It's like you're a pretty innocent bunny and he’s a big fox just waiting for the right time to strike :)

Soft sex/ praise

I know what I said up there

But none of that means he doesn't love just setting you down on the bed with candles and rose petals and just making love

Soft music in the background and worshipping every inch of your skin

You need to be vocal though!

Tell him how pretty he is when he cums, and how perfectly his dick fits in your hole!

Tell him how soft he looks and how he is making your nipples feel like heaven.

Aftercare- bc I am also soft for aone and he is a good guy

Bubble baths and chocolate

Movies and cuddling

All of this makes him so glad that he found you

Especially when you cuddle into him all sleepily and tired.

Shoyo Hinata

oh he is so pretty-

Mutual masturbation

It's the perfect way to experience pleasure

He can see you in all your glory

All of the faces he sometimes misses when he’s fucking you!

He also learns from it!

He sees the angle your fingers go to hit that sweet spot so the next time he’s in you he knows where to aim!

(he is so precious-)

Pegging

You wanted to try it so he almost immediately agreed-

But it felt good!

The two of you reserved what one you wanted so the one he picked was almost made for him.

Plus, you look ridiculously good with the strap on-

And he voices that as much as he can!

And sometimes when he rides the strap he just watches it going in and out and in and out

(you also think this is SUPER hot but won't tell him :/)

Riding

It doesn't matter if it's you or him

Watching you fall apart on his cock without him doing a thing makes him cum harder than anything

Sometimes he gets so excited that he comes before you and makes you stay there until he’s hard again, which doesn't take long at all.

when it's him?

he’ll go for hours just to hear you tell him how good he is and how pretty he looks

Lingerie

Especially pastel babydolls

But nothing you wear could ever make you look bad in his eyes

Ok he likes it when you keep the lingerie on too like he’s fucking you and you till have a little nightgown/crop top on

Lord he will BUUUUUUSSSTTT

Lev Haiba

Size kink

Unintentionally too

He didn't even know it, but he did know that he liked that you were so much smaller than him.

He likes to put your hand to him and just look at the difference and before he knew it he was painfully hard

On the occasion, he makes fun of you saying his dick is just too big for you and you can't handle it, but then you get on your knees and he shuts up real quick

Praise kink

A given

He wants to know how good he makes you feel at all times

It doesn't have to be words either!

loud moans explanations of pleasure all drive him to move faster and faster!

Even yelling “oh god!” gets him off

He makes you feel that good huh?

Wall sex

Just playing on the size kink thing

He loves to just pick you up and fuck with reckless abandon

Gets a way better angle too- bet you didn't think he would realize that

He also likes to watch the combination of your juices drip to the floor-

Shugo Meian (MSBY captain)

Sexiest team-

Daddy/ Captain kink

Just look at him, he screams Daddy louder than you do when he’s fucking you

He takes pride in being Captain meaning he’ll fuck you for hour if the word even falls from your lips

And yes you have said it (daddy) front of the team and he did get hard, and the both of you did fuck in the locker room of the gym for an hour before you got kicked out

Even in arguments you better call him daddy, he will stop and fuck you into the ground for it

Angry or not you WILL use his title

Spanking

Will threaten you with this almost everyday

He just uses it as an excuse to touch your ass

He makes you count after each one and makes you thank him

It would look a bit like this

“Five! Thank you Daddy!” “Good Baby, five more”

But that doesn’t mean when you really deserve it that he won't unleash the wrath of god onto your poor ass

But after he’ll kiss it all better and Daddy will reward you for taking your punishment well

Controlled orgasms

By this i mean that you wont cum unless he says so

And you have to ask

Aka “Daddy please let me cum, I really want to”

And depending on what he’s feeling maybe you’ll get to cum then

And if not you’ll have to wait like a good Girl/Boy and cum when he does, which could late literally forever.

but its better than disobeying his orders, which could lead to him completely pulling out and just jerking off to cum on you :((

Deepthroating/ Face Fucking

Nothing is better to him than coming home to you on your knees and mouth open and ready

But when he’s all pent up from practice and he sees you?

Rip your throat, you aren't talking for a few days

He’ll literally fuck your face no question

He’ll put his dick so far down your throat you could feel it in your stomach

Yutaro Kindaichi

Hate sex 

He just makes everyone angry

And he gets off on it

You look so fucking delectable all red faced and angry

Makes him want to just slam into right then and there

Dom/Sub

Clearly he wants to be in control

Controlling someone is just such a  turn-on for him

Looking all pretty doing exactly what he wanted you too <3

Hickeys 

Wants to show off that you are his 

What better way than marking up your neck with pretty bruises

Plus he likes how you get all shy when people look at them