#My first foray of writing in my notes app

[picturesofthegoneworlds]

Restless

Imogen can't concentrate.

(standard procedure for up to a couple weeks ago, now it wears a different guise.)

She fidgets, sits with her legs crossed on her bedroll, backpack in her lap, removes, itemises, arranges its contents, huffs stray hairs out of her face, hands still twitchy, mind still scrambled, organises it all again. Repeats. 

It's early, the fact given away by the low-lying sun and crisp smell on the air that has not yet been burned away by its sustained and blistering presence. 

The blisters on her ankles, the friction of leather that is still not fully broken in. Imogen delays in pulling on and lacing up her boots, calves restless but exhausted, thrumming if they remain still too long (too long being only a moment).

She falls back heavily onto the bedroll. 

Overhead, in the weave of vines and branches, birds sing. They're mocking her, surely, the awkward and bound to the ground sack of flesh and fat and bones that she is, hair frizzed and sticky from the humidity, her inner thigh chaffed and perspiring where the contact of her dagger's harness coils around it like a constricting snake.

She loosens it a few notches

The pathetic and inconsistent touch of it frustrates her more, so she buckles it tight like a tourniquet. 

She exhales, deflates, heavy as she is, runs the back of her forearm over her brow, spreading the salt and sweat, breathes in, feels the connective tissue holding together all of her joints, exhales, arm to ground, along with every other limb, the back of her knees, her spine, her shoulders (there's a rock digging into one through the mat, did she sleep on that last night?), her neck, her ass, wishes they were all gelatin, that she could become one with the floor and not collide with every edge and corner and texture of it, stop being so reactive. 

She inhales, skin pulling away, wishing it would continue, peel, lift, blanket, canopy (closer than the trees), shade, but it would drip with blood, hot and sizzling as it rained back onto her exposed bones. 

Shadow, the dark tatters, the veil. Molasses of ichor. Dull, hazy, sharp, thorns. Don't touch, don't approach. Space. Wail, scream, chorus, silence. That would chase the birds away, feathers dislodged from sudden movement re-lodged into black tar, carried off, away, down sluggish stream, no contact. Barbed like a briar.

The thread of the bed roll is itchy, the weave of it too thick and open, rough spun from fibrous burlap, it splinters bare skin where it makes contact, nape of her neck, backs of her forearms, thighs, knees, and calves. 

Delicate, cool, billowing lace that accommodated to the pads of Imogen's fingers, to her palm, fractured by magic, calloused and freshly wounded, it dulled even the rows of needle teeth beneath. Imogen imagines it her bedsheets, the ground would not matter - could be rivers of lava jutted by shattered glass, it would not matter, sure, cool billowing lace, Imogen would sleep well. 

Easier to tell now, how restless her hands are. They pluck at the gauzy linen that makes her dress, the more rigid weave of her waistcoat, following stitching as if it were pathways, movement, roads to get her somewhere, them, skin to skin contact barriered like the rock digging into her shoulder. Her touch meanders to her chest, unintentional, she swears, in promise and obscenity, a winding path with sides towered by hedges and trees that block the horizon, a shock carried from the point of touch to manifest as an ache between her legs and a weightless haze in her head, body rolling, shoulders leaving the mat, leaving the rock that digs, a breath to a sigh to a gravelly moan, sends a bird or two scattering away, a leaf or two falling behind them. 

Fuckin' birds. Relax. More touch. Touch is good? Barbed. Thorns. Restraint. Maybe she should grow her nails, maybe then the touch won't feel her own. Laudna - fuck, the name gets a reaction from her again, the jolt in her core as she feels the heat pool at the surface of her face, her neck, her chest, crimson damming, damning, acid rising to her throat carried by the guilt of it. 

She kicks and squirms, side of a fist like hammer to nail on the bedroll beside her, other covering her face from the shame of it, it being the burn, the rolling simmer, the violent boil of want and guilt and acid and sting and she is so restless, boiling over, she can't concentrate, the contact of the ground and the fabrics and the atmosphere all feels wrong, scalding, now she knows what to compare it to, how it could feel, what she could be touching. 

Could be death calling, alluring, maybe, how long she flirted with it. Cold with head empty, sounded nice, still does, though the delivery and means maybe different now. A face to an end, ends her, finishes, acid in her throat again, hand bunching the rough fabric under her hips. 

It moves of its own accord to her thigh, takes a fistful of cuff and flesh and she sobs, eyes scrunching shut so tightly that she starts to see colours in the dark, blotches of crimson in a grey dream, her body in the butcher's cart. 

Dreamlike, hazy, drunk (this must be how it feels), she moves without thought, groping herself through the crotch of her shorts, writhing, the floor is too hot against her back, sweat gathering at her hairline and salt beading down into her eyes, again, breath short, short, when did it get so shallow, dizzy. How long could she hold it (hold herself), heat, radiating into the cup of her hand, squirming, a worm under boot, squashed before it gets to dine on the corpse. She pushes firmer against herself, shudders, the feel of the floor leaving, rolls her hips onto the press of her fingers, barriered, dulled, not enough, as they fumble, clutch at the shorts and wrangle the inseam of them in frantic pulls against uncomfortably undulating heat, heat, damp forced through from the close contact onto the pads of her fingers and Gods she's gonna have to prestidigitate that, what the hells is she doing, Laudna could return from her morning forage or whatever it is any moment and

fuck the thought doesn't quell the need at all, her hips spasming and knees shaking as she holds them suspended and trembling, working herself up, frantic, frantic and desperate. How did she get here? she followed the woman at the market, the woman followed the yellow bird, the birdsong silenced for pathetic needy moans, her hips raised so high her shoulders are pushed further into the cut of the offensive rock, princesses and mattresses and beans or whatever that fairytale was Laudna had mentioned about ladies and their proper behaviour. 

Proper, right, she should stop, get it over with, fumbles with the fastening of her shorts, hand making its way beneath fabric before it's fully undone, now registering coarse curls, then slicked, heat, heat, heat, hot, wet, eager, soaked, soft, the glide of her intensity, betrayal, soaking. fuck. Touch is not enough, hers, fuck. Not right, the feel of callouses and scars and heat and a barely registrable thrum shit what happens if she gets away from herself, gets too excited. magic fried uncontrollable she is out of control fuck the heat of the bedroll on her back and the push of the rock imbedding imbedded scars wrapping tangled suffocating sinew silvered skin nightmares burden and guilt guilt guilt storming-

Imogen rolls over onto her front, the rock through the bedroll pushing into her chest, against her sternum, aiding to evacuate the bile that has been suspended in her oesophagus but the guilt won't leave her thighs slicked and hot and tacky and uncomfortable and the chaffe of the itchy fabric of the mat burning them, restless, as she removes her fingers from between her legs, wipes the evidence of a pathetic and failed and just and just wrong attempt onto her shorts, prestidigitates it all clean as if she can wash herself of her impurities and intentions, dares to think of the occasions the purple glow has evaporated the rain from Laudna's clothes and skin, now a selfish act, was then too, maybe, always selfish. 

[thevalleyisjolly]

Truly giggling and kicking my feet at this threesome smut fic, it started out (as most of my fics do) with the intention of being a funny ficlet with some wink wink nudge nudge fade to black, and then whoops, it turned into relationship exploration via porn.

[daisynik7]

Double the Fun

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x f!reader x Reiner Braun

Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

Word Count: ~3.9k

cw: next-door neighbors Eren and Reiner, modern day au, all characters are mid-twenties, explicit language, p*rn no plot, smut – threesome, vaginal sex, anal sex, anal play, spit play, nipple play, cunnilingus, face-riding, blowjob, hand job (M/M), double-penetration, multiple orgasms from the reader, sex toy use (anal plug), cream pies (in both holes), Reiner is a bit of a perv and sniffs panties (just like how he sniffed Historia’s letter in the finale LOL), pet names (baby, sweetheart, sweetie), slight degradation (use of slut, cock slut, whore, and cock sleeve to address the reader), slight breeding kink, sex without a condom (assuming reader is on some form of birth control)

Summary: You’ve been having a bit of a dry spell recently with how busy you’ve been at work. When you finally manage to snag a date with one of your online dating matches, you’re unfortunately stood up, leaving you in a worse mood than before. Lucky for you, your two hot neighbors are more than willing to cheer you up.  

Author’s Notes: Phew! This one is a doozy! Please make sure you read the content warnings before reading. This is filthy and shameless; I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! I LOVE Eren and Reiner together, idk, they just always scratch this everlasting itch I have. I’m still getting used to writing threesomes, so I hope this is okay! Also, this is my first foray into butt stuff and I may have awoken something inside me, LOL. MDNI divider by the loveliest @/cafekitsune. Thank you for reading! 

Taglist: @batafuraikisu @neverlandlostchild @bloompompom @dprkento @a-listaire @man-knees @slvt-for-smut @antique-remains @aiyaaayei

part 4 of to all the boys who live next door anthology series

“Are you sure you don’t want me to sit, like, two tables away? What if this guy is sketch?” 

You can spot the obvious concern in Pieck’s voice through the speaker of your phone, which is currently face-up on top of your vanity as you get ready. You finish the last steps of your makeup, inspecting yourself in the mirror, satisfied. “Don’t worry, I’ve got pepper spray in my purse in case he tries anything funny,” you assure your best friend. It’s been a while since you last went on a proper date. Pieck’s always been a worry-wart about you meeting strangers from your online dating apps, constantly reminding you to stay vigilant. Tonight is no different. 

“You should at least let your hot neighbors know that you’re going out, so they can keep an eye out for you,” she suggests, throwing that in casually. Ever since you moved in a few months ago, she’s been rooting for you to hook up with either of the two men next door, Eren Jaeger and Reiner Braun. She’s met them plenty of times in passing and would much rather you date one of them instead of the countless of mysterious men on your current roster. 

There’s no denying that they’re attractive. Eren with his long, dark hair, striking eyes, and toned physique. Reiner with his sharp jawline, broad shoulders, and well-groomed goatee. They also happen to be incredibly friendly towards you, always greeting you in the hallway with a genuine smile, asking how your day went or what you’ll be up to. They’ve invited you for dinner on several occasions, which has always been pleasant, sometimes leaning towards the flirtatious side. You’re sure they’re just nice guys, cordial neighbors looking out for one another. There’s nothing more to it than that, even if a small part of you wants there to be. 

You step back from your reflection, checking yourself out once one more. “I’ll be fine, Pieck.”

“What if I can’t reach you? There should be at least one other person who’s aware of your whereabouts, right?” This is what binging too many true crime documentaries does. Still, you’re grateful for your friend’s concern, knowing it’s all out of love. You can tell she’s actually distressed about this, so you end up agreeing, mostly to appease her. She wishes you well before hanging up as you slip into heels by the door. 

You tug at the hem of your skimpy black dress, hand motionless on the doorknob. It’s your first date in over a month. Work has been so busy that you haven’t had time for romance or sex. The variety of sex toys tucked away in your drawer has been your only solace these past few weeks. To say you’re ready for some real action is an understatement. You’re also incredibly nervous, afraid you’ve lost your groove. That’s why you’ve taken extra measures to fully prepare yourself for anything tonight. 

With a deep breathe, you step out into the hallway, following Pieck’s advice. You knock on your neighbor’s door and Eren is the first to answer. His expression brightens when he realizes it’s you. “Hi,” he greets you, flashing that charming smile of his. He scans you up and down, taking in your appearance. “Wow.”

“Is that a good wow or a bad wow?” you grin, twirling for him. 

He swallows hard, checking you out once more. “Definitely a good wow.”

It’s that extra boost of confidence you need for this date, so you’re appreciative of him. “Thank you, Eren. You’re always so sweet.” 

He crosses his arms over his chest, smirking. “So, hot date tonight?”

You decide to be honest with him. “Yeah. It’s been a minute, so I’m a little nervous.”

“Don’t be. Any guy would be lucky to date you.” His eyes twinkle at you kindly.

You imagine Pieck screaming at you from twenty miles away, begging you to date Eren instead of going out with this random swipe right. Eren is simply a sweet guy paying his neighbor a compliment. There’s nothing more to it than that. Before you get the chance to thank him, Reiner’s deeper voice calls out from inside the apartment. “Who is it?”

Without taking his eyes off you, Eren answers with your name. Soon, the blonde joins him, jaw dropping when he notices you. “Fuck.”

Eren elbows him in the chest, to which Reiner mutters a strained apology. “Sorry. You just look amazing.”

The flattery is almost too much, cheeks warm with embarrassment, stomach fluttering. “Thank you.” Reiner is usually the more forward of the two, blurting out whatever is on his mind, though you’re not complaining. 

Grinning, Reiner asks, “So, who’s the lucky guy?”

“Someone I met online. My friend said I should let my wonderful neighbors know my whereabouts tonight, in case I end up missing,” you explain casually. 

“How morbid,” Eren chuckles. “We’ll keep an eye out for you later so that your friend doesn’t have to worry.”

“I would appreciate that.”

Reiner raises a brow at you. “Unless you’re planning on sleeping with him. We probably won’t see you if it does go well.” He hunches forward when Eren lands another blow to his chest, shutting his roommate up. 

You giggle, agreeing with him. “No, you’re totally right. I’m going to stay optimistic and say that if I don’t come home tonight, that’s a good thing.”

“We’ll hope for the best, then,” Eren replies, beaming. 

You turn to leave, waving farewell to them. Reiner yells out, “Have fun tonight! But not too much fun!”

~~~

You return to your apartment complex less than two hours later, heels clicking loudly on the tiled steps, feet heavy with disappointment. After taking a twenty-minute taxi ride to the restaurant you agreed to meet him at, you proceeded to wait an entire hour only to realize that you’ve been stood up. No text, no reply, no call. You’ve been made a fool, completely humiliated, the night and the rest of your weekend absolutely ruined by this asshole’s no-show.  

It takes you a while to dig through your purse for your keys, patience already worn thin. Frustrated, you groan out loud, staring up at the ceiling. “Why me?”

In the worst timing ever, the door to your left swings open. Eren pops his head out, saying your name curiously.

Reluctantly, you turn to face him. “Hey.”  

He comes out, dressed casually in sweats, hair wrapped in a messy bun with the few stray strands draping the back of his neck. “That was quick.”

With an unconvincing smile, trying to hide the shame that currently consumes you, you admit, “I got stood up.”

His demeanor changes instantly. The concern on his face is endearing, and when he drifts towards you, he reaches out, then drops his arm, unsure how best to console you without crossing any lines. “No way.”

You nod, sighing. “It’s true.”

“Fuck, I’m so sorry.” He steps closer to you, hesitantly placing his hand on your shoulder, testing the waters. 

You smile at him, enjoying this simple touch of comfort. “It’s fine. It is what it is.”

The two of you linger like this, Eren gazing into your eyes, holding you. His palm is hot on the fabric of your dress, and for a split second, you wonder how pleasant it’d be on your bare skin. And maybe it’s your wishful thinking or your desperation for human contact after being rejected tonight, but you can feel the heat of a spark between you now. Before you let your fantasies drive you to do something unprecedented, you search your bag again, finally retrieving your keys. He lets you go, watching you shove them into the keyhole, unlocking the door. “Are you okay?”

In all honestly, you’re not, but there’s nothing him or anyone else can do about it, right? “I’ll be okay. Sucks that I got all dressed up for this, though. What a waste.”

He doesn’t respond right away, choosing his words carefully. “Well,” he starts, the faintest blush tinged on his cheeks. “It doesn’t have to be.” 

You stare at him, heart beating faster, making sure you’re understanding him correctly. “Really?”

He clears his throat, licking his lips. “Yeah. Maybe we can get some use out of it.”

“We?”

As if on cue, Reiner emerges from inside their apartment, having heard everything. “Fuck that shitty asshole. You’ll have way more fun with us.” He stands next to his roommate, grinning at you.

This time, you do listen to Pieck’s voice in your head, yelling at you to go for it. To let these two alluring neighbors of yours take care of you the way you deserve. Already feeling better, you give them a coy smile, opening the door to let them in. “Okay, then. Come on in.”

~~~

It’s the first time they’ve ever been inside your apartment, though you save the formal tour for later. As soon as the three of you are inside, door shut, shoes off, they’re both kissing you fiercely. Eren faces you, slipping his tongue into your mouth, hot and heavy. He caresses your sides, squeezing the curves of your body through your dress. Reiner is behind you, grip just below Eren’s, firm on your hips. His lips brush delicately on the nape of your neck, groin pressed to your backside, the bulge protruding from his pants growing harder and harder between your ass cheeks. You moan into the kiss, pussy throbbing in your lingerie, eager to be touched by either man, by both of them. Why did you even bother trying to hook up with strangers online when the perfect matches were beside you all along?

Reiner chuckles, breath hot on your ear, voice low and rugged. “You’re really horny, aren’t you? All dolled up and ready to be fucked, huh?” There he goes again, blunt and straightforward and so fucking sexy, exactly what you need tonight. 

And here is Eren, soft and gentle, committed to kissing you, whispering sweet nothings any chance he gets. “You’re beautiful. Such a gorgeous girl. So pretty for us.” Also exactly what you need. 

You lead them into your bedroom, Eren flipping on the light switch, keeping his lips on you while Reiner strips out of his clothes, starting with his pants. Eren does the same, hoisting his shirt off, revealing his impressive figure. You attempt to slip out of your dress, but Reiner stops you. “Keep it on,” he rasps, down to his underwear now, boner more obvious, poking out from his briefs.  

Eren pinches your butt, snapping the tight fabric to your skin. “We’re not letting this go to waste, remember?”

You nod mindlessly, brain hazy with lust, too eager to be fucked. “Fuck me,” you beg, spit smeared all over your lips. 

They both laugh softly, walking you towards the bed. “So impatient, so needy,” Eren coos, positioning himself in front of you, toying with the hem of the skirt.

Reiner sits up against the headboard, propping you up on his lap, your back pressed to his muscular chest. “What’s the rush, baby?” he teases, licking a stripe behind your ear. “We’re going to take care of you. Right, Eren?”

Eren bites his lip as he works your dress up past your thighs until it’s bunched up at your hips, exposing your soaked thong on your wet cunt. “Oh fuck yeah,” he huffs, salivating. “Gonna make you feel so good. Make you come so fucking much.”

You spread your legs wider for him, a pathetic whine escaping your throat, more and more desperate by the second. He hooks his finger on the crotch of your panties, smirking at the string of arousal that stretches between the fabric and you. “So fucking wet, holy shit.” 

He tugs it all the way off your legs, tossing it over to Reiner, who brings it up to his nose, taking a big whiff. “Such a slut for wearing these on a first date. Our naughty girl.” He lets your lingerie fall from his grasp onto the floor, sliding to the plush of your thighs, keeping your legs spread apart. 

Eren dives in, spreading his wide tongue flat on your clit, moving it side-to-side, stimulating you into your first orgasm. Your knees twitch from the sensation, the pleasure rippling through you like waves of ecstasy. You turn your head towards Reiner’s, opening your mouth, pleading him for a kiss. He obliges, sticking his tongue inside you, slurping up your saliva, hungry for it. “You’re so fucking nasty,” he growls, reaching for the drawer beside the bed. “Bet you have toys hiding in here. Why don’t we have some more fun and play with them?” You whimper wantonly, keen on the idea of Reiner using whatever he wants on you to make you come again. 

He finds exactly what he’s looking for: your precious anal plug, tapered on one end, heart-shaped gem on the other. When he pulls it out, he barks out a laugh, almost like he can’t believe his luck. “You really are a whore,” he whispers in your ear, sinister and wicked, about to have too much fun with this. “Did you prep yourself to be fucked in the ass? Be honest.” Even Eren pauses, peering up at you, curious. 

“Yes,” you mewl, squirming with arousal, body tingling all over.

Eren’s chuckle reverberates against your clit, releasing you from his mouth to lap at your wet slit. “Good girl,” he muffles, collecting your cum on his tongue. “So perfect for us.”

The dynamic between them spurs you on, Eren playing the good guy, Reiner playing bad. Both of them work together with a common goal in mind: to cheer up their pretty neighbor from what would have been a bummer of a night. But already, you’re thankful that you were stood up; you’re certain now that this is the much better alternative. 

“Eren, switch spots with me,” Reiner demands. “And you,” he says, giving you a quick peck on the cheek. “On your stomach.”

You both obey him without protest. Eren leans against the headboard with a dazed look in his eyes, licking his shiny, cum-coated lips. He smiles as you gaze up at him, wrapping your fingers around his shaft, stroking him. You open wide, tapping the tip of his dick on your tongue before sinking down on him until you’re too the hilt, swallowing him into the back of your throat. He cups yours cheeks, caressing you gently. “So fucking pretty with my cock in your mouth. My gorgeous girl.” You accept the praise shamelessly, relishing the distinct taste of him.

From behind, Reiner worships you, squeezing your ass cheeks, spreading them apart to ogle at your fluttering hole. Without warning, he hocks a frothy wad of spit directly onto it, teasing his thumb on the rim. “Fuck, baby,” he utters as you moan on Eren’s cock. “I’m gonna put it in now, okay?”

You nod, taking Eren deeper, your nose pressed to his groin, drool leaking from the sides of your mouth, bracing yourself. The plug is slick with lube as Reiner pushes it in carefully until the heart-shaped jewel is flush to your hole. He swears under his breath, marveling at the sight before him, cock pulsating in his fist. You stay like this for a while, adjusting to the toy inside you. It really did help that you prepared for this earlier. 

“So sexy,” Eren murmurs from above you, staring on your backside. “You take it so good, sweetheart.”

“Like an obedient slut,” Reiner adds, using his thumb to push the plug the slightest bit deeper. He lifts your hips to position himself below you so that you’re straddling his face. “Can you come again, baby?”

“Of course she can. She’s our good girl,” Eren purrs, petting your head softly as you continue to blow him. 

Reiner eats you out sloppily, different from Eren, who’s intentional with his every move. It sends you into another frenzy, pushing you closer and closer over the edge, especially when he begins playing with the plug, pumping it in and out of you slowly. You’re overstimulated with Eren’s hot cock throbbing in your mouth, clit swollen on Reiner’s tongue, and asshole puckered around the smooth glass of the plug. You reach your climax easily, gushing all over Reiner’s face, riding out your orgasm until you’ve completely soaked him in your juices. He drinks it all up, messy and greedy for every drop of you he can scour. He really is as insatiable as you imagined he’d be. 

You release Eren to catch your breath, to which he tips your chin up to face him. “You’re incredible,” he says, the familiar twinkle in his eyes making your heart race. You paw at his chest, crawling up to meet him for a kiss. 

Reiner quickly joins the two of you, not wanting to be left out, rubbing his hard cock between your ass cheeks. You kiss the both of them at the same time, all of your saliva mingling together into a hot, wet mess that you’re currently intoxicated by. After a moment, Eren pulls back. “Does our pretty girl want to get fucked now?”

“Show us how big of a cock slut you are,” Reiner grunts, circling the jeweled end of the plug, teasing your hole. 

Eren helps remove the dress off you completely, hoisting it off your body. He stretches his arm towards the drawer. “Are the condoms in here too?”

You shake your head briskly, bringing his attention back to you. “I want it raw. Want you to fill me up.” 

They both moan, clearly fond of your request, kissing you feverishly. Eren nudges your breast into his mouth, latching onto your nipple. Reiner sucks the skin all along your neck, leaving his love marks, growling, “You want us to breed you, huh? Want all this cum inside these tight little holes of yours. Oh fuck.” His voice is rough and husky, gradually losing his composure. 

Eren’s remains tender, his breath soft on your bosom. “We’re going to breed you so good, sweetheart.” He shimmies down the bed, lying flat on his back, peering up at you with adoration. You straddle him, rubbing yourself on his shaft, needy for friction on your aching clit.

Reiner’s embraces you from behind, groping your chest, focusing on his roommate’s dick and your wet cunt gliding along it. He reaches between you and Eren, fisting his friend’s cock with fast strokes. “Look how hard he is for you. He’s going to fuck you so good. Make you cream all over the sheets.” Your pussy is sopping with arousal from the dirty talk alone, but watching Reiner touch Eren has you dizzy. 

“Fuck, Reiner,” Eren moans, throat bobbing as he swallows hard. “That’s so fucking hot.” He lets his roommate jerk him off while you continue to grind yourself on him. Soon, he replaces Reiner’s fist with his own, cockhead glistening with precum. “Are you ready, sweetheart?”

Reiner moves to your swollen bud, tapping it with his thick fingers. “Oh yeah, she’s fucking ready. Come on, cock sleeve. Put it in.”

Without wasting another second, you line yourself up with him. Eren slides in smoothly, his entire length in you, pussy stretched around him perfectly. You whimper from the fullness, his cock to the hilt and the plug nestled in your backside. Reiner places his hand on your posterior, urging you to lean down so that your chest-to-chest with Eren, who kisses you passionately, remaining still inside you. “Eren,” you whimper his name, drooling into his mouth. He smiles against you, delighted at how fucked out you are for him.

Reiner adjusts his stance, hovering over you by planting one foot on the bed to prop his knee up, giving him enough leverage. He focuses on the plug, tugging it out just barely only to push it back in, repeating this several times, causing you to cry out in pleasure. Finally, he removes it completely, staring wide-eyed at your gaping hole, oh-so-inviting for his fat cock. “Look at that,” he croons, circling your rim with his finger, sensitive to his touch.

You want so badly to be stuffed full by both of them. In a trembling voice, you whine, “Please, Reiner.”

Laughing, he delivers a harsh smack to your ass, skin immediately stinging from it. He dribbles more of his spit onto you, teasing the tip of his dick on the rim. “Not yet, slut.” You can’t see him, too immersed in kissing Eren right now, but you can practically hear the wicked grin on his face, watching you squirm below him as he torments you.

Eren intervenes, annoyed with his friend’s behavior. “Come on, Reiner. Give her what she wants. She deserves it.” He nuzzles his nose to yours. “She’s been a very, very good girl.”

Eventually, Reiner relents. “You’re right. She’s a good girl. And good girls deserve to get fucked in both holes.” 

You shiver at his perverse words, bracing yourself. At last, he guides himself inside you, filling you to the brim. It’s better than any fantasy you could dream of, the sensation so intense, tears begin welling in your eyes.

They start thrusting simultaneously, Eren pummeling your cunt from below, Reiner pounding your ass from behind. It’s messy and raunchy, their hands slippery all over your body from lube, slick, and sweat. The air surrounding you is laden with lust and desire. The collective moans from all three of you echo off the walls of your small bedroom, along with the squeaks of your mattress creaking under the weight of your vigorous lovemaking. 

Reiner is rendered speechless now, totally concentrated on pumping his cock in and out of your fluttering hole, the only sound from his mouth being his ragged breaths. Eren slips one hand between you, his digits pressed to your puffy clit as he fucks up into your pussy. The other fondles your tit, thumb flicking your nipple until it’s perky. He continues to praise you, constantly musing about what a good girl you are, how perfect you are for them. 

At this point, you’ve lost track of how many times you’ve come. You’re in a perpetual state of ecstasy, surrounded by the two hottest men in your life who are voracious for your orgasms. The sour memory from earlier has completely faded and all you can think about is the sweet bliss you’re currently indulging in. 

Eren is the first to come, no longer able to endure it. His even thrusts turn erratic. “Fuck, I’m coming. I’m coming inside you sweetheart, oh fuck.”

You kiss him languidly, drinking up his moans as he floods your cunt with his load. Soon, Reiner swears loudly, announcing his own climax. “Fuck, gonna breed this slutty hole.” His cock swells, spurting his warm seed inside you.

You relax on top of Eren, who’s equally as spent as you. Reiner pulls out slowly, fixated on his own cum dripping out of you. “Fuck. Let’s see the other one, baby.” You lift off Eren, who almost seems reluctant to let you go. Both of them watch with hazy expressions as his creamy load spills out of you and onto his lap. 

The room is musty with the scent of sex, the sheets messy and stained beneath you. Despite that, you’re on cloud nine, soaring high from having the nastiest ménage á trois with your next-door neighbors.

Maybe you should try getting stood up more often. 

[hotcinnamonsunset]

hey there!! your knits are so much fun and i absolutely love looking at them. can you talk about how you design your patterns? it’s something i’ve thought about doing for a while now but it seems soooo intimidating especially since math is not my strong suit :’)) i’d love to hear about your process and maybe any advice you have for starting out!!

hi hi hello!! and hooray for foraying into the world of pattern design🫶from the patterns i've managed to cobble together, I can say that it's only as math-y as you make it - I think the part that ends up making me cross eyed and at my wits end mathematically is scaling a pattern up and down from the size you've knit it (but at that point, you do have a finished object, hooray! it's just about fine tuning measurements and thinking about gauge😭)

anyways! putting this under a cut because I'm sure this'll get wordy...

the first thing about making a pattern is make sure it's something you like, obviously. whether that's color, pattern, but most particularly style - going into it excited makes it suck less during the whole process. for me personally, as much as I like making circular yoke sweaters, I much prefer the looser chest/underarm area of a raglan sweater so almost all the things I knit are raglan. I also liked the idea of colorwork on the bottom of a sweater even though that's not very traditional because you don't have to worry about increases in the pattern design like you would with a circular yoke (which I still don't know how to design that...so I simply do not, lol)

I have a running list of ideas in my notes app because like all artistic endeavors, wanting to make something but not having inspiration is a terrible feeling. with that, I love looking at lino print art in particular or coloring book pages or line art because that two-color style is easy for me to visualize as something approachably knittable. so, for example, in my tiger sweater, I used the upper left tiger as a reference to chart the colorwork:

which is where my most beloved tool comes in: stitch fiddle dot com :) there's a free version which allows you to do a fair bit and a paid version that gives more convenient features if you find that you like what stitch fiddle has to offer (also the subscription fee is very inexpensive and they are super upfront about things? like. they emailed five days before my subscription ended and said no worries! if you don't want to renew simply do nothing :) and then they don't auto charge and auto renew, which seems so wild with how most subscriptions work. anyways!)

with the patterns I write I mostly use stitch fiddle for color work charts but they do have built in symbols for lace work and cables and brioche stitching amongst a lot of other things. they also make exporting charts very easy to put in a file with the written pattern.

one thing that helps when coming up with a pattern is being familiar with the construction of that thing - I knit so many socks and sweaters from other people's patterns that after a while I'd be like, oh look at that! cast on 64 stitches! who would've thought! it's not like I haven't done that a dozen times before :) so my first few projects were kind of like an average of the usual measurements and stitch counts from various projects and then adding in my own modifications that I do to patterns (longer sleeves, shorter torso, etc).

then this is where a bit of math can creep in...first I made and blocked a gauge swatch so that I could confidently say that the yarn/needle combo has, like, 9 sts by 11 sts for a total 36 sts across and 44 sts down for a 4 by 4 inch square swatch. then I took a sweater I liked the size of and made a lot of measurements (across the chest, shoulder to the bottom, armhole depth, across the neckhole, length of sleeves, etc) and then using the gauge, figured out some stitch counts I needed: like if I want the body of the sweater to be 20 inches across the chest, I'll need 20 inches times 9 sts times 2 (to account for the back) which gives 360 stitches for the body of the sweater. so using these calculations along with an average of all the patterns I knit before gave me a decent idea of where stitch counts need to be.

then, with some approximate stitch counts and general construction ideas you can start with something like, for example: casting on 144 sts for the neck and needing to reach a yoke depth of 8 inches to separate the body and sleeves and the sleeves need about 80 stitches each including sts picked up from the underarm and the body needs 360 sts will help to figure out increases to get stitch counts where you need them. using other published patterns as a loose guideline for pattern structures to make sure you're going in the right direction and not totally reinventing the wheel helps things from getting too overwhelming.

(again, the worst math does come in with scaling for different sizes. this is where lots of knitters who knit small sizes stumble as reddit slash craft snark is quick to point out - knitting a larger size doesn't really mean just applying a scalar to the stitch counts you have. just multiplying stitch counts will give comically long and wide results - looking at what other patterns give for size measurements as well as scouring online for what size dimensions different garments are for s/m/l/xl/xxl/xxxl etc and using the gauge swatch to say, oh! the chest circumference for an xl is 50 inches so with 9 sts/in that'll mean I need 450 sts for the body of the sweater etc)

also don't be afraid to start with small design projects to build confidence! the first thing I made was a cat sweater😹and then lots of socks🧦🧦🧦

as for other resources, I haven't actually utilized this book yet but I know it's been helpful for lots of other knitters: https://tincanknits.com/collection/strange-brew which is a fairly structured guide to establish some colorwork pattern design basics. some print books that I've utilized includes The Knit Stitch Pattern Handbook, the Japanese Knitting Stitch Bible, and Alterknit Stitch Dictionary for fun stitch patterns and variations and cabling stuff. these books mostly come in handy because searching for stitch designs online is strangely a hassle and all of these were at Half Price Books at some point or another and buying a knitting book made me feel like A Knitter™️ lololol.

there are advanced things like tech editors and pattern testers but I have yet to dip my toes in those waters so here's my two cents in that you'll be just fine if you don't want to either. i'm definitely kinda winging it here with designing things but you gotta start somewhere! everything can always be frogged and there are always lessons tucked away behind every mistake.

[summonerluna]

🍓📚🍄

🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction?

It has been so long I honestly don't remember how I first discovered fanfiction, just that I was very young (like...12 or 13), the internet was very new, and my first foray into fanfic was very cringe. I LOVED the band Hanson (I still do love them as musicians and if never listened to their stuff once they grew up you definitely should!), and I guess I must have just searched for fansites on places like geocities and angelfire, and discovered webrings and signed up to get emails for this fanfic someone was writing--as in, they emailed out the entire chapter to their mailing list whenever they updated. And that led to finding other sites where people hosted stuff and writing my own. Then came livejournal and fanfiction.net and meeting really awesome friends through being a giant fucking nerd

📚 ⇢ what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app?

Actual notes app vs google docs where I write most of my stuff down, but thoughts on Queenbosa and Zelda realizing the actual nature of their relationship post-Calamity:

Zelda either has a memory or Deja vu triggered by something she does with Link—makes her think of a moment from her childhood with her mother in gerudo town, and realizes they must have been in a relationship and not just friends. Angst—that her mom had to hide her love and that Urbosa lost her love and then her daughter and could never tell anyone so she suffered those losses in silence

Zelda grieving the mother she could have had, if she had known, if she had been allowed to stay in gerudo town, if Urbosa had not died

Link did not tell Zelda pre-calamity once he knew because he knew it wasn’t his place to say, and because he didn’t want to add that kind of sadness to Zelda while she was struggling so much and wouldn’t have been able to speak with urbosa; one of so many things he thought she would have time to learn about and process when she could give it her full attention

Zelda does not want that to be her; nobody should have to hide their relationship or grieve the love of their life alone. Maybe she does a ceremony or memorial of some sort for them together, either in GT or at the Hateno house. 

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

It was not unusual for Link to make up reasons why they needed to delay getting back to the castle pre-Calamity; either because he could tell that Zelda was upset and needed extra time before having to deal with her father or other castle politics, or if there was something out in the field she got excited by and stopping would give her time to study and take notes. He would become very concerned about rumors of monster camps along their path that might reroute them or cause them to be caught out after dark, or he would be concerned their horses seemed too tired, things like that. She knew it was bullshit, and he knew that she knew. They never talked about it, because it would have meant having to talk about WHY he did it and neither of them were ready for that conversation.

[sometimesanalice]

Hello, Alexa!☺️

How are you?

A bit of a random Q, but! I remember you saying that the first fanfic you wrote

was ‘Oh Christmas Tree' and I was just wondering if there was any other fandoms

you ever thought about writing for? Even if you don’t want to publish them! :) An even more general question, what other fandoms would you say you're into?

I know it's a little random, but I just love hearing about other people's interests/loves! 🥰

(I’m sorry if you’ve answered these in some way before)

Have a lovely weekend!

Hi Bo!! 🌟 I'm so good! I'm having the best afternoon with some coffee and a treat from Trader Joe's and working on a fluffy oneshot! I hope you're doing well! I love seeing you pop in my inbox!

The call of Bradley with a pine tree allergy and getting his best girl a fluffy pink one was too strong for me to resist! It was such a new thing for me that I wrote the whole thing on the notes app on my phone, it didn't even cross my mind to open a word doc for it, lol.

It's such a funny thing that for the years and years that I've jotted down ideas and dialogue that I never once thought of actually sitting down and trying my hand at writing fanfic until last year!

More for you under the cut!

My first foray into fandom and fanfic was when I was a nugget out there wilding on fanfic.net and shipping Clark/Lana from Smallville and Padme/Anakin from Star Wars. (back when I didn't even know what shipping meant, lol)

In college, I didn't have much time to read books because of all the school work, so I turned to fanfic again and got really into The Hunger Games. Dandelion Peeta had my heart, and all the modern AUs really softened the dystopian angst. That fandom had so many truly terrific writers, ones that I still follow even today.

Which is how I ended up becoming a big The 100 girlie. Some of my favorite THG authors started posting and writing for a couple of the main characters on that show and I was hooked. (it's been a lot of fun to learn that some of my fav TGM babes were also the 100 babes, so we've trauma bonded over it, haha)

And let me tell you, I need to be financially COMPENSATED by the CW for the chokehold this man had on me for like 5 years. (the hair! the gravely voice! the chin dimple! the biceps! the grumpy king with a heart of gold!)

If I was going to write for another fandom, it would be that one. Bellarke (bellamy blake and clarke griffin) still has my heart. At the height of it, I was spending hours every day reading fic for them. The chemistry between them was bananas and every week I was waiting on baited breath for any little interaction between them. It's funny now because the actors are actually married now, haha! The show gave us crumbs and went out with such a tragic whimper, but the fandom and the incredible talent there is probably why I was so invested and still read fics about them on AO3.

When I reread my favorite series The Winners Trilogy by Marie Rutkoski I fall DEEP into an Arin/Kestrel spiral. It's such an underrated YA series that I'm pretty sure I've read every piece of fanfiction that's out there (which isn't nearly enough) at least 5 times.

There was a brief Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen GOT era, but it was short lived.

I also like the Darkling/Alina dynamic from Shadow and Bone. I read the series when the books first came out before the show, and wasn't particularly enamored with them as a couple. But then they had to go and cast the pretty bearded attention whore that is Ben Barnes and I had simply no choice but to ship, lol.

I always joke and say that I don't pick the hyperfixations, that they choose me. But it's really true. The 100 ended in 2020 and I didn't have anything really capture my attention in the same way until TGM. This is the first fandom that I've really participated in, like getting to know other people and creating content! And it's been so wonderful!

Oof! Well, this got out of control quickly, lol. This was such a fun ask to get! I haven't been asked before, so I really went off the deep end here giving you my full life fandom history, haha!

[tameila]

Was kindly tagged by @belphegor1982 to participate in this 20 questions for writers trend! thanks for the tag! 💕 tags for anyone who sees this and wants to take a whack at it. tag me in your responses, if you do!

How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 10 works on ao3 with plenty of little one-shots posted here on tumblr and at least triple that many WIPs lmao

What's your total AO3 word count?

My current ao3 word count is 165,375 words. TSAR is responsible for, like, 70% of that word count.

What fandoms do you write for?

On ao3, I've only posted for Critical Role, and I do not foresee that changing, but who knows! Before Critical Role, I never really saw myself as a writer that posted on public forums, and it's not as if I haven't entertained and dabbled in other fandoms.

Overall, including collaborative writing/roleplaying, I have written for Warriors (yes, the cat books), Bleach, Naruto, Hetalia (im sorry you have to learn this about me), Glee, Dragon Age, and Digimon.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Sun Always Rises (550 kudos), multichaptered modern AU Pikelan

give my regards to soul and romance (186 kudos), one-shot based in @jabletown's rejoice AU, Pikelan with Dadlan and Pike & Kaylie bonding

le petit encore (145 kudos), my mediocre TSAR 'verse smut fic. every time it gets another kudos i am pushed closer and closer to continuing my smut WIPs because i swear!! i promise!! i can write better smut!...but i am rather proud of this piece because it was my first serious foray into the world of smut and i gotta recognize my own hustle lol

As Easy as Riding a Bicycle (113 kudos), modern AU/college-aged Pikelan, Pike's bike gets stolen and she turns to a dating app to try and find it and finds love instead. super love this piece. everyone should read it and give it more kudos so it can be my third most kudo'd piece teehee

TLC is a Two-Way Street (104 kudos), TSAR 'verse, Pikelan, Pike looks after Scanlan while he is sick

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, yes, yes! Even as I free myself from the shackles of needing that validation and feeling discouraged if I don't reach some arbitrary number of engagement, I cannot deny that comments are inspiration and writing fuel. So, when I get a comment, I think it's the least that I can do to respond, even if it's just to say thanks.

I am definitely guilty of sitting on comments that make me particularly happy for weeks on end before actually remembering to respond tho

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

the things we know and the things we wish they knew, which was my first CR fanfic and written in response to ep 85 iykyk

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I mean, it's gotta be The Sun Always Rises

Do you get hate on fics?

No, thankfully not!

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

As mentioned previously, I only really have one serious smut fic, though I have written a couple other bits and bobs....and maybe I have a couple WIPs that may or may not see the light of day. I'm not sure what kinds of smut there are...but I guess I would describe my approach to smut as 'I am a sex-repulsed asexual and idk what's really going on here but I'm here to express closeness and intimacy and love in this strange new world' lol

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

If we're talking crossovers in the sense that characters from two separate fictional stories meet and interact, I have written in roleplays back in middle school like that but never explored the concept in fanfic.

If crossovers also includes taking the concept of one fictional media and inserting the characters of another into it (e.g., Hogwarts AU or HDM AU) then I've definitely written and have plans for various fanfics like that. I don't think that I have any that I would consider "crazy", but I do think my brief notes and writings for a OTGW-inspired Nygmobblepot/Riddlebird fic were v inspired.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of and hopefully not! Very little gets posted in the Pikelan fandom that I don't see, so I like to think I'd be hard to pull a fast one on

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet, but I would love to see The Sun Always Rises translated into other languages someday!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I've entertained a couple co-written fics that have unfortunately never gotten off the ground much, but I'm not closed off to the idea. I see it as being quite similar to roleplaying!

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Oof. As a lifetime shipper, that's a tough question. I never truly let go of a ship, even after I've moved on from a fandom, but there are definitely some that are far more enduring in my heart than others.

Of course, if we're going off of writing alone than it's Pikelan. Writing TSAR got me through some of the hardest years of my life and, despite what's become of them and what I'm forced to endure by continuing to engage in the fandom space, they're special to me in a way that a lot of other ships can never be, no matter how much I love 'em.

Also, in the case of writing, FenHawke. selfishly, of course, Fenris with my Hawke. I love writing for them, and I consider the pieces that I've written for them to be amongst my best. They're the Dragon Age ship for me.

What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

.....[shamefully hangs head] A-Side and B-Side, the sequels to TSAR. I'm gonna keep writing them for as long as I am able but, if there ever comes a day that I post an update and get zero engagement, then I think I'll just have to move on. but! if even one person keeps coming along for the ride, then I'll stick to 'em. I just don't know if there's anyone who loves my writing enough to stick around for, like, another 5 years lol

The other big one is Vex's Delivery Service...which is exactly what it sounds like. A Kiki's Delivery Service inspired AU but it's about Vex. though truly, it's a thinly veiled excuse to write about domestic Pikelan is what it is. I have the whole thing planned out. I just can't ever seem to get it off the ground and, at this point, with the way I'm halfway out of the CR fandom, I don't think I ever will.

What are your writing strengths?

I have been extremely lucky to have been complimented on multiple facets of my writing over the years. However, I think what I pride in myself the most is my ability to let each scene breathe and take its time. It means that I take forever to write and nothing's ever short, but I don't think I would like writing quite as much if I wasn't allowed to let each moment have its breathing space.

What are your writing weaknesses?

It's a bit of an oddball pick maybe, but it's something that I feel like I have to own up to as a notorious modern AU writer:

People say that modern AUs are uninspired and boring, especially when you're taking characters out of a magical fictional world just to put them into our world and....the rumor's are true. I just don't get that into the lore of a fictional universe to ever feel comfortable writing in it. I do just find it easier to write everyone as humans in a modern-esque society. Now, I will stand by the fact that part of the fun of modern AUs is taking these magical characters and interpreting into a modern space (I often do the opposite with modern era characters into a fantasy world of my own design), but I just want to fully own up to the fact that...yes, I am too lazy to research the intricacies of canon in order to write a proper canon compliant/adjacent fic.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I think it has it's place.

For me, if it's a language that the POV character understands/that the reader should understand alongside the POV character, then there's no reason to write it in that language. Simply include a dialogue tag to explain what language the character was speaking in. and I say this mostly from a logistical/ease of reading standpoint. Having to scroll down to the bottom of a fic or switch to a separate tab with the translations interrupts the flow of reading.

If, however, the language is included, untranslated, to reflect the POV character's own lack of knowledge of the language then that makes more sense. because you, as the reader, are meant to keep reading at the same level of understanding as the POV character and there's no pressure to be rushing for a translation just to make sure you're not missing an important line of dialogue.

but of course, as with most things, it's writer's choice!

First fandom you wrote for?

Warriors, probably...maybe Hamtaro. I definitely read fanfic for it and had my little daydream musings, but I don't think I wrote anything down.

Favorite fic you've ever written?

Oooh, we talkin' fic fic? That's long gone, and it's up in the air which of those many early fandoms that it was for.

If we're talking that's readily available on ao3, then my first was the things we know and the things we wish they knew. though, I was writing and posting Dragon Age one-shots on tumblr before that one.

Coming back because, for some reason, I misread this question as what was the first fic I'd ever written lol. Obviously, the answer to favorite is The Sun Always Rises.

[gothicvampireteamedward]

Back to Basics

I was on tumblr before I was ever really on tumblr. By that I mean, I was an incredibly sheltered kid whose parents were (with hindsight, rightfully) wary of the Internet. It always felt like I was lifetimes behind my friends in hopping on trending social media apps. I never had a Facebook; to the point where I don’t actually know how to use it now that I do. I was barely even allowed to use Club Penguin, though I eventually grew savvy enough to find a work around their restrictions.

That didn’t stop me from browsing through an array of social media. Even when I wasn’t allowed to have my own accounts, nothing could stop me from pulling up the website on the family computer and scrolling through my favorite pages. Side note: this is how I found out an old friend of mine and I weren’t close anymore. I had pulled up her Twitter page for my weekly catch up to find she had made new friends at her new school. This was devastating for an 11-year-old me, but also dramatic considering we are still close friends now. Socializing in the early 2010s was funny!

A junior high friend of mine was using tumblr, that’s how I heard about it. I was absolutely enchanted by the aesthetic pages, a style my generation was heavily influenced by. You could say it was my introduction to digital curation. I could’ve written a thesis paper on that for my MLIS degree, now that I think about it. The effort bloggers put into crafting their feed to fit their specific niche was intoxicating. Did they even relate to the posts they reblogged? Who cares! This all pink feed was pretty! And then I discovered the tag features, and all hell broke loose there. My life in fandoms was cemented over hours of pouring through the percabeth tag.

I think if you weren’t on tumblr in the early 2010’s, it shows. Derogatory.

I did eventually create my own account, which was my first formal foray into social media, mind you. All of this to say, my childhood tumblr was a shit storm. I can’t look at it anymore, it makes my stomach clench. It’s Pandora’s box and a time capsule all rolled into one. No way am I opening that back up.

But I grow nostalgic in my old age. All of my social media apps are filled with ads, and I can’t find any of the people I follow in my feed. Wasn’t that the point of Instagram? To see the silly little photos of people I have actually had a conversation with, or at least simultaneously existed in a space with? If my timeline is going to be filled with nonsense, it should at least have a methodology I can get behind. Hence, tumblr.

That’s a shallow reason as to why I’m back on tumblr. Really, I appreciate the form. Tumblr has never been as limiting as the other apps. No word counts. Any number of images can be posted. I can write an essay, or post a picture or hyperlink a recipe I’ve found with ease. And I can title it! Add some tags that actually have a function! I am interested in expressing my self in ways beyond what Instagram, tiktok and Twitter have offered me (the holy trinity in my mind). So back to the basics.

At the heart of it though, I want to write more. I already write. I journal all the time. I’m not exactly consistent, but since 2018 I’ve gone through six or so journals (I’m not at home to count). Putting my thoughts to pen and paper has never been an issue for me, but sharing them is. Tumblr has always been a safe space, in that most people in my life don’t have one. I used to go on reblogging sprees of whatever fandom-of-the-month I was into without a care in the world of who would see, what they would think, would they mind, etc. Now when I go to post something on my story, I think about it thrice.

I’ve also always been nervous about sharing my voice. That may come as a surprise to people close to me, as I seem to always have an opinion. But it is easy for me to comment on things that don’t matter. But unless directly prompted, I hardly ever talk about what does. So consider this practice.

I hope for this to be a space where I can feel confident in what I produce. Even if I write something awful or incoherent; I hope I unapologetically write it with my chest (does that idiom even hold still?). I am going to use this space to write some short essays on the topics raging through my head, share quotes from favorites pieces of media, review and analyze what I’m watching/reading, and maybe even get out of my non-fiction comfort zone. Who is to say? The world is my oyster!

[bridge-supplies]

#2: Humanity as a History of Tool Use

I'm an engineer at heart. How some writers must write, some poets must sing, and some artists must paint to demonstrate what they care about, I find myself building Android apps instead.

It probably all started with LEGO. Realizing as a child that pre-built parts could be recombined in infinite ways is surely a way to foster creativity and tinkering. But it didn't really hit its stride until my brother introduced my elementary school self to GameMaker. Going from placing physical bricks to digital ones (their "code blocks" visual programming language) was a natural progression.

Going from code blocks to real blocks of code was yet another step. GML was close enough to standard programming languages that adopting a Computer Science degree alongside Psychology in college became within reach. Who could've known that building a juvenile top-down RTS called Balls of War would ultimately secure me an Android job at a tech startup with a decent work/life balance and room to keep experimenting?

Soon, I found myself concocting ideas for apps using whatever new Android features were available at the time. Realizing that code could create tangible experiences you could literally place in the palm of someone's hand was a pivotal moment. Practically anyone with a laptop and an idea could, in theory, build something that could fundamentally change how we interact with each other as human beings.

And then I stopped huffing the copium. The mid/late 2010s began to dirty the once-hopeful image of our Silicon Valley Saviors. How could we believe technology is inherently a force for good when tools are being intentionally designed to manipulate and extract value from others for the profits of the few? How can we trust digital social spaces with our communities and collective humanity when the platforms themselves are built with anti-human biases from the start?

The only constant that every tool has is the intentionality and bias of its wielder. Anything can be a weapon or a salve depending on who is giving it power and attention.

I'm a believer in the ideology that groups of humans help each other best when they make the right choices the easy ones. Those choices can be made even easier by intentionally designing tools that increase their accessibility and support the solidarity of its users.

When I review my prior attempts at tool building, I've seen my intentionality grow. But something has always felt missing.

Material Typer (2015)

A colorful note taking app with basic color filtering and early Material Design support. Helped secure my first job out of college!

KVAN Radio (2016)

On a week-long work-study program for an Arizona ecovillage/cult my friend was a part of, I built some basic task management software and an app for their local radio station.

Toro (2018)

My first foray into the wild world of wireless inter-app communication. This was a note sharing app I built for my family for Christmas which let you share private messages with each other by tapping your phones together.

Degree (2018)

More of a concept than a fully fledged app. I wanted to use my NFC knowledge from Toro to build a fully in-person social network, where you can only update your friends' information (and info about their networks) by connecting phones over NFC in person.

Bool, Condivi (2019-2020)

Further experimenting with Android's wireless capabilities, I attempted to build my own library called Condivi which would make NFC, QR code scanning, and Nearby Connections sharing (WiFi/BT) easier to develop for. My first attempt at implementing it, Bool, was a basic contact sharing app where you'd scan a QR code to initiate encrypted wireless data transfers with your nearby contacts.

Common (2021) (Google Play)

The pandemic brought about a whole new world, and forced me to change my thinking. If we could no longer connect in person as easily, how could technology still help us be closer to each other? First, we have to start with getting closer to ourselves. Common is a habit tracking app, where you observe your motivations over time for the most important activities you want to accomplish each day. As you use the app, you learn more about yourself.

Archetypist & Adepticadian (2021) (Google Play 1, 2)

With my introduction to the density of the Law of One material, I found myself wanting a way to organize the information provided in a more intuitive format. What resulted were two apps: Archetypist to explain their version of the Major Arcana of the Tarot, and Adepticadian to follow your own "adept cycles" to anticipate both catalyst and reflection.

TeamBuilder (2022)

My idea for Bridge Supplies began with TeamBuilder: an app built for managing and organizing decentralized teams of aligned individuals. Heavily inspired by the approaches outlined in Better Work Together (such as the Group Leadership Chart), the goals of TeamBuilder were to show how 1) everyone has leadership qualities and 2) those qualities are most effective when group leadership composition is well balanced.

Class Warfare (2023) (Google Play Private Beta)

My love of strategy games reared its ugly head once more, as I found myself suddenly obsessed with recreating the turn-based strategy game Fire Emblem into a Jetpack Compose-built native Android app. I wanted the game to have a unique win condition as well: you can only win once every one of your units has "Advanced" to their upgraded form by getting a kill, creating an interesting meta of stronger units protecting weaker units until they can get their own Advanced skills.

The common theme I have seen through many of my projects: from my early abandoned game concepts made with GameMaker, to my more recent abandoned app concepts made for Android, is that I have tried doing it mostly alone. Sure, I have gotten some feedback from others, but never tried expanding to a wider audience, or fully fleshing out an idea to completion instead of just being satisfied with the tech demo.

That is where you come in, dear reader. My goal here is to build tools, align them with what I believe to be pro-human values, and make them accessible and relatable for the masses. This space shall be our collective testing ground, and I couldn't be more excited to share it with you, fellow human.

[unhealthyfanobsession]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

Ok I am actually going to do these in order and give a little explanation as an extra challenge. I think it's interesting what my faves are vs which are most popular. If anyone has read more than one of these and remembers reading it, I'd love to know what you think or thought.

5: Renegade Nights

This was my first long-form Nessian piece and what I love about it is the ideas. It was all written pre-acosf and during the pandemic. I needed something to do and it was the first time I had gotten back into writing in a LONG time. I don't write like this anymore. I don't love the style and I think it's a little in your face/tell don't show, but I still love it and I stand by the ideas in it. (RIP to when I thought I was Suzanne Colins out here writing in present tense with no reason to be. Yikes.)

4: Shadows of Death

This is a chapter in my one-shot series that I LOVE. I always struggle to write Azriel and whenever people ask for him I don't know what to do, but this one just... came to me. His voice was so clear and I wrote it all in one sitting on my notes app. I love the Nezriel brotp and the connection of the darkest parts of 2 pretty dark characters.

3: Going for Gold

People LOVED this when it came out. It started as an evening project while I watched the Olympics this summer, but the characters just took over. It was my first foray into an ensemble cast and a way to challenge myself to write better action scenes. Overall, it was quick and there are things I would change, but it has a place in my heart.

1: Nightmare Dressed Like a Day Dream

This one-shot just has a place in my soul. It was my cathartic, pissed off, I will not accept this narrative post ACOSF pop off and I think it is some of my best writing. I've re-read it so many times. It is my comfort fic for myself.

1: The Best Laid Plans

This story, to me, represented a shift in my writing style. Both in fics and my original stuff. I consciously focused more on visual and active descriptions rather than throwing everything into the dialogue and I think it showed. I remember being very proud of every chapter of this when it was coming out. I spent time. I focused. I edited. And I think it helped a lot of those things become more natural. This is the story I credit with how I now slam out all those prompts directly into the answer box of a tumblr ask while I walk home from work. This story was the first time I felt like I was writing something and proud of it rather than just sending a silly little fic into the wind. It is my most commented on and most liked fic, and it was the first time I felt like people were responding to something I wrote because it was well written rather than because I was just giving them overdramatic scenes that they wanted. I think the characters are represented in a realistic and fair way that was not as bias as my earlier stuff, and that made for more dynamic relationships. I know it seems like I'm really self-congratualing here, but I tried hard with this one and I am proud of it.

Honourable mention: Assentio Mentium

I think some people might be surprised this didn't make the cut. The truth is, this story is so personal and I use it as venting sometimes. I have a love-hate relationship with it, but it has to be mentioned because of how people respond to it. This story has the most thoughtful comments of anything I've written and it makes me feel so good because it is a lot of my real experiences and opinions so I love the response and the dialogues. (also I'm more than halfway through the next chapter, it isn't abandoned I just struggle to get inspo on this one sometimes)

[bthearst]

update #2.

NaNoWrimo, BookTwitter, Rejections -- oh my!

THIS IS A LONG ONE.

It's been a doozy of a month with the beginning of the holidays, nighttime knocking on my frosty bedroom window by 4:30pm, and the ongoing decline of the accursed bird app. The days keep coming and they don't stop coming.

Starting off this post with a celebration of the devastating total of 20k words achieved on this year's Nano project. It's only devastating because, as a completionist, seeing goals left unmet is the equivalent of taking 10d6 damage to the soul. Last year saw the birth of The Unbinding, with 50k written in November and another 20k added at the beginning of December to round up its first draft. I thought that with that manuscript currently being queried, I would be able to tackle a fresh new story, and this was my first mistake which turned into a necessary lesson, one I've been fighting for the last three weeks.

You see, The Unbinding is the first project that I have ever seriously committed to publishing through traditional means. I've been writing for upwards of 15 years and it wasn't until summer of 2021 that I came to accept that I could, and should, hold myself to the same esteem that I hold my favorite writers to. This meant that I would be buckling down, rewriting, and revising a story I truly fell in love with. Revising is like pulling teeth for me, so I established myself as a one-and-done type of person from the get-go. Outline and outline well, leave no scene unscrutinized. This meant I had a pretty solid base, an impenetrable one, when I began last year's Nano. So, five drafts in (five!), I decided that this was as good as the manuscript was getting. I called it a day, participated in two whole Twitter pitch events, and sent out my first query batch.

Every writer is different. I've read about writers pitching third drafts, fourth, tenth, twentieth, and landing agents. After all, the amount of revising that goes into a book is never-ending. After all, by the time some agents get back to you, you'll be another two revisions in.

This is hubris speaking. Don't you fucking listen to it.

I set this manuscript aside for three whole months. Had it sent to beta readers go through it while I focused on other things. And it was all well and good until I realized that nothing -- nothing -- that I put down on this year's Nano felt right. Every word felt rushed, wrong, empty, and while yes sometimes this is what it's like to write a first draft, I realized that I just wasn't having fun with it. The story may be good, but I was fighting something else inside my head that I didn't want to acknowledge, and that's that The Unbinding wasn't ready. I was tackling a new project and 'abandoning' something that held me in a vice grip for the better part of ten months.

"But, Mitch," you say, "if it wasn't ready, why the hell did you start querying it?!" One word (Or two, depending on how you look at it.): BookTwitter.

Twitter is the internet's hub for writers trying to break out into the scene. You have your users who post daily prompts for writers to QRT with their nifty little graphics and fun snippets of their epics, promos left and right, follow chains, the whole shebang. It's a place where young authors build a readership based off engagement and the wringing of the algorithm.

I am not a Twitter person. Sure I've been using the app in tandem with Tumblr since 2011, but I've never been savvy at it. Good lord did I try to be savvy though, engaging with said games and graphics but alas, I'm also not a graphic designer so my moodboards weren't as stunning as those WIP spotlights with 200+ notes.

That being said, I plucked a handful of books during my year-long foray into that side of the internet. It's a great platform to find diverse books by diverse authors, but it's also a place that is oversaturated with everything. Advice from querying writers, authors prepping for their debuts, agents searching for manuscripts, all going by at rapid speeds. The dreaded "this is what's selling so if you want to sell your manuscript you need to jump on it RIGHT NOW or else you'll miss your window".

So I did. Queer Gothics are in right now, I saw an opportunity, and I took it. Even when the story felt like it needed work, I went for it. I wanted to be in with the cool kids, wanted to make friends with all these hip zoomers clawing their way into tradpub. I focused so much on it that I lost sight of what truly mattered-- writing the story I need to write. Writing is rewriting, after all. I wasn't sick and tired of looking at this manuscript. In fact, I was still excited to work on it, make it into the best thing it could possibly be.

Since the whole Musky Man debacle started going down, I decided to simply cut back on my Twitter usage. It was making me miserable for a variety of reasons, but mainly because it isn't just for writing or the laughs. There's no way to curate that damn place, so one tweet will be about this cool new book that I would want to preorder and the next is about mass shootings and the government sanctioned genocide of trans people. As a trans QPOC, I literally cannot continue to split what little brain power I can spare towards creativity between doomscrolling and trying to squeeze myself into zoomer spaces.

I'm a writer. A cave-dwelling hermit. I am not designed to market myself, I do not have an algorithm-based software in my brain that enables me to build engagement, to grow my follower number on Twitter so that when agents ask me to link my profile on their query tracker submissions they can look at it and go "oh yes we can get a best-seller upon launch on these numbers alone!" It's exhausting. I'm an adult who's constantly fighting for their life, to make ends meet, to keep a roof over my head, to not spiral into depression every time I see another gut-wrenching article. There aren't enough hours in the day for me to blast on social media while also trying to write a damn book.

Shit's fucked, lads. I wish I had an answer to this. I don't. All I can do is step away, recalibrate, buckle down on creating, and start swinging again.

In short, The Unbinding is facing a major rewrite. Restructuring the plot for many a reason. Of the ten queries I sent out, I've gotten three rejections, and the jury's still out on the other seven.

I'm actually not discouraged by said rejections, either. There's this feeling of accomplishment that comes with every one I receive, an opportunity to learn, the understanding that I'm here, that I've done it, that I have something to put out in the world. It's daunting, terrifying, exhausting, but goddamn am I enjoying the ride. With any luck I won't get any full manuscript requests now that I've decided to go back in, but if it does happen, I'll just be completely honest with them.

I'm also fairly certain that my query packet was a hot fucking mess because I'm not joking when I say I have no idea what I'm doing. Beta readers? Critiques? Nah. I'm rawdogging this shit (for now).

BUT ALL OF THIS ASIDE---

The Wilds (first longer-ish play) has been workshopped and is currently in its second draft. What was meant to be a one-act has grown to a considerable length, but we're going with the flow and seeing where it takes us.

The Untitled Folk Horror story is still in the pre-drafting stage. I'm knee-deep in research, found some good sources while learning that my researcher badge on campus has finally been revoked thanks to me graduating last May, so things are getting a little harder to find. Who knew it would be this hard to find anything about a colonized culture from its own people rather than their colonizers, especially when two whole powers did their best to destroy everything during their invasions? Hurr.

So yeah. This concludes this very long post. Went to the library today to pick up a book I had placed on hold, ended up walking out with three whole books. Said book is What Moves the Dead by T. Kingfisher, and depending on if the mood strikes, I'll write a little review on it on here!

Cheers.

[darlingandmreames]

WIP Tag Game

The ever lovely @iamanonniemouse tagged me in this, so let's go!

Rules: List all your WIP titles, all meaning even the ones that are vague or nonsensical. Tag as many people as there are WIPs.

Running Through My Veins Like Sin- this is my The Guest fic that I keep posting about lol. I've been working on it a little over a month, am a little over 35k in, and it's maybe a third of the way done. Absolutely loving it lol

There is No Power in Innocence- the resurrected Prince Regent AU for Kingdom! It had been abandoned for a while but my recent Kingdom rewatch got me back into it and I think I've added like 16k since then. I WILL finish it dammit

Everything Looks Perfect From Far Away- an Arthur/Eames fic that I actually just started last night that I'm going to be a bit cagey about right now but am very excited about lol 👀

Set Your Glass Heart Next to Mine- my mercenary!Kallus fic whose Spotify playlist is currently an hour and 45 minutes long

Mummy fic- my Jonathan/Ardeth fic that I think I literally started first year of grad school. Five years later and it's still not done, but it lives in the back of my mind rent free

Daddy Issues In Their Many Forms- my modern AU Kingdom fic that gets its working title from @zenyteehee 's excellent fic Violence In Its Many Forms (which you should definitely check out). I think I actually have more of this fic written in the notes app on my phone and in the outline document than in the fic itself, but oh well

Lean In (Trust Falling to a Concrete Floor)- a hurt/comfort Arthur/Eames injury fic that I MEANT to finish last year and THEN meant to finish at the beginning of this year and then uhhh did neither of those

Seizure- an Arthur/Eames fic where Arthur has epilepsy! I've actually used info I learned in researching this fic in my clinical placements both doing outpatient neuropsych testing and working on a forensic inpatient unit

Fake Marriage AU- what it says on the box lol. It actually started as a prompt here on Tumblr but then I had Ideas(tm) about it, which is never a good thing. @dbakeiro has heard me rant about it and incoherently talk through plot points to no end, and I SWEAR I am actually going to finish it one of these days

Guilty as Charged- my 110% self-indulgent niche fic where Arthur and Eames are both psychologists on a forensic inpatient unit. I absolutely love my field and have decided to (eventually) make that everyone else's problem

And When There's Nothing I Can See I Dream I'm Disappearing- my first foray into writing Saito/Cobb fic! I can literally SEE the fic so clearly in my mind, now I just have to get around to actually finishing writing it lol

Finding A Home Somewhere- very niche, but this fic is an AU for The Man From Nowhere (excellent movie, highly recommend it- brutally violent and will absolutely break your heart). Did one member of the pairing kill the other in canon? Yep. Is that going to stop me? Absolutely not

Blindfold- an absolute BEAST of a kalluzeb fic dealing with a Force sensitive Kallus, his slow questioning of his loyalty to the Empire, and ultimate decision to defect. It's literally 70-something thousand words and only like halfway done. It was supposed to be my entry for the kalluzeb minibang last year, but there was NO WAY I was going to finish it on time and I was getting super burnt out on it, so I ended up switching to another story instead. I still plan on finishing it eventually though! Also the entire document is current in bright purple comic sans so that's....a thing

Gangster AU- my baby. My precious child. A 1920s era Arthur/Eames Inception AU involving a wonderfully angsty backstory for Arthur, the un-fridging of Mal, and a lot of playing fast and loose with what technology would technically be available in 1921. @dbakeiro has ALSO heard me talk about this fic to no end and I ALSO promise I will finish it eventually lol

Autistic Arthur fic- I strongly HC Arthur as autistic (yes I am projecting, no you cannot stop me) and wanted to write a fic from Eames' POV of coming to understand and accept Arthur's way of interacting with the world and learning to navigate relationships (both platonic and romantic) with him

More Than Your Thousand Names- trans Arthur and nonbinary Eames. Need I say more?

And there you have it! I will eventually finish these! Someday! Maybe! I will gladly yell about any and all of them to whoever is interested in listening though lol. Tagging @zenyteehee @girlforbid @hazelestelle and anyone else who's interested!

[somethingpositive4positivepeople]

HSV-2 Holistic Healing

I chose the blue pill…Nope. Not the blissed-out blue pill from the Matrix. The generic antiviral, Valacyclovir. Wonky sleep, Uber Eats, cycles of physical stagnation, and the continuous flow of panini press stress sent me back to popping pills. I felt frustrated by the familiar tingle in my right butt cheek. 

My awareness heightened to the presence of a stress-related sore on my ass. I constantly shifted in bed at night and shuffled my weight in my seat during the day to alleviate my pain. I asked for a script to go back to what I knew during a recent long overdue trip to the OBGYN. Cue the genital herpes storytime chime…

MY HSV HISTORY

My first foray with daily antivirals was when I had my first genital herpes outbreak in 2006. 

After a quick exam, my doctor casually diagnosed me, “Yea, that looks like a herpetic lesion.” He gave me a topical ointment out of the office pharmaceutical sample supply cabinet and wrote me a script for Valtrex. In a way, the daily antivirals were like the blissed-out blue pills helping me to easily disassociate from the virus that took root in my nerves leading to my left labia and right glute.  

Fast forward a few years to 2009. I started practicing yoga and other mindfulness techniques and learned to integrate the parts of me to make me whole. I cultivated a sense of curiosity about my mind and body. Living with Lupus since I was 12 years old, I had always questioned the long-term effects of western pharmaceuticals on my body. My mindfulness practices took me a step further to challenge myself to sit with the discomfort of experiencing an outbreak. I weaned myself off daily antivirals and reduced my consumption to only when I felt the common quivers of an early outbreak. 

HERPES HOME REMEDIES

And then manipulating my dosages was not an option. I was laid off from my corporate gig and lost access to affordable health insurance. I leaned on herpes home remedies like tea tree and coconut oil salves. I found even more resources listening to Dr. Lacey Chittle’s functional healing episode of SPFPP. I booked a consultation with her and learned more about the ways that I could boost my immune system to ease the impact of my outbreak symptoms. I intentionally began to incorporate lysine supplements and natural sources of Vitamin D3 into my diet, which worked well enough until a traumatic event preceding the panda express stress caused all kinds of dis-ease in my body.

           Weirdly, I can thank Panasonic for my renewed access to health insurance; new laws made it so that small business owners could collect unemployment and apply for Obamacare. I jumped at the chance to seek medical attention for my laundry list of long-neglected chronic illnesses and subsequently made the decision to return to antivirals to help alleviate my anxiety around outbreaks. Although I probably did not need to take meds again. Turns out when I was reviewing my Flo App notes I had done a better job of managing my stress in 2020 than I thought. I only had an outbreak 61 out of 366 days! 🤗

HEALING HOLISTICALLY

I am grateful to have access to affordable healthcare and multiple medical treatment options. I know everyone does not have the same privilege, so I want to share some self-care practices that have helped me to think differently about my HSV-2 outbreaks. Having the awareness of the frequency, intensity, duration, and location of my outbreaks has been transformative in how I think of my body and the illnesses that cohabit it. Below are two tips to help you mentally manage your STI.

WITNESS & WRITE

Observing and being witness to changes in your body is the first step towards overall well-being. The path to wellness starts with understanding the unique baseline of our bodies, curiously observing any changes, and then making an informed decision about the best care plan. In practice that could look like daily body scans when you wake up. Once you get into the habit of doing this daily, body scans can also be a really powerful practice to try while you’re experiencing an outbreak.

HOW TO DO A BODY SCAN:

Inhale Deeply. Exhale Fully.

Mentally scan from your head to toes and notice: 

What emotions do you feel? Inhale. Exhale.

What physical sensations are in your body? Inhale. Exhale.

Where you are experiencing the outbreak. Inhale. Exhale.

How does that area feel? Inhale. Exhale.

What’s the temperature? Cool? Warm? Hot? Inhale. Exhale.

Describe the intensity of the tingle or the outbreak pain Inhale. Exhale.

What emotions come up for you? Frustration, shame, grief, guilt? Inhale. Exhale.

Leave space between questions. Instead of providing an answer just observe what comes up for you and how you feel. The next step in the process is to write it down. Write down all the feelings, sensations, emotions that came up for you during your body scans, note the location and frequency of your outbreaks. As you document these changes during outbreaks, notice emotional and physical patterns in your body. Research and my lived experience show that the more curious we are about the changes in our bodies the more we easeful acceptance of ourselves and create a path to well-being.

Jewell Singletary

[thegreenmeridian]

4. 11. 15. 18!

4. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

I already answered this one, so I’ll tell you another thing I have cooking. It’s my first foray into Fitzconte, and it’s pre canon.

11. Is writing your passion or just a fun hobby?

A hobby I’m passionate about!

15. If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose?

Well, I mostly write porn so I’m not sure if anything COULD be filmed.

But if Jared Harris ever feels like bashing one out on camera, my Crozier angst-wank fic would be nice.

18. Do you use any tools, like worksheets or outlines?

Nope! I write on the notes app on my phone when the mood strikes.

[ysalamiri-queen]

2019 Fic in Review

Inspired by @myevilmouse I’m going to sum up all the writing I’ve been up to the past year. I’m really proud of what I’ve accomplished, and thanks to you all for the encouragement to put my ideas out into the world! This has been a year of trying new things, and really growing as an author I feel… And wow according to AO3 I’ve written about 400k words in the past 12 months, damn. So let’s get to the list, going from the beginning of the year to the end, and as always please heed the tags on these before reading.

Note: As I go back, I’m realizing a lot of the links were messed up or are just straight missing. I am on the Mobile App so things can get messy. Please visit my works page on AO3 HERE to see all of these on my page under JessKo and my other pseuds.

1 Late Night at the Slab

Idea: Filling a prompt for the Thryce server in which some, uh, unique Chiss anatomy was assigned.

Result: A 3-way with Thrawn, Arihnda, and Eli and my first foray into the more Xeno side of things in a Modern AU setting. Yeehaw!

2 The Trouble With Free-Roaming Ysalamiri

Idea: Based on some adorable ysalamiri cuddles art by @strength-through-order I wanted to write some Thranto fluff.

Result: Ysalamiri-filled Thranto fluff X’D

3 Inquisitor’s Debt

Idea: What if the Grand Inquisitor changed sides at the end of Rebels season 1?

Result: Some fun throwbacks with Obi-Wan and Caleb Dume leading up to Quizzy defecting with Ezra.

4 Ancient Stems

Idea: Eli Week drabbles based on the Vanto Week prompts.

Result: A silly buzz droid narrative with Thrawn and some cute slice of life Eli backstory/Ascendancy days bits.

5 Charnsuka

Idea: Kinky stuff with Lord Garmadon when he’s an Anacondrai.

Result: Kinky stuff with Lord Garmadon when he’s an Anacondrai. Sorry Zane!

6 Caged Like Prized Birds

Idea: Again inspired by the awesome Chiss anatomy and Thrux drawings by @strength-through-order , I wanted to craft a narrative around Armitage, as a young man, stumbling upon a clone of Thrawn.

Result: Man, this might just be one of my favorite things I’ve ever written, had so much fun plotting it out and the smut is mmm! Tentacles everywhere~ I’ve gone back to re-read this a lot, I’ll admit it. I hope you all enjoyed it too.

7 Quiet On Set

Idea: Must. Write. Talos.

Result: A cute little platonic x-reader with everyone’s favorite Skrull. This was my first MCU fic too.

8 Diagnostic

Idea: Wanted to apologize to Zane for the damages done in Charnsuka with some Glacier shipping fluff.

Result: A silly glacier thing leading to a bit of foolery. I’m happy with it!

9 Heron Soaring

Idea: A continuation of the plot line from Heron Rising with Kanan and Thrawn.

Result: Too many feels… but some great sex to soften the blow, Kanera too!

10 Patron

Idea: Responding to a tumblr prompt from @wukeskywalker regarding Thrawn commissioning LOADS of artworks of Eli.

Result: More Thranto fluff! I see a trend here…

11 Black Heron

Idea: Kanan x Pryce for @myevilmouse , I think this was our first ‘collaboration’ on something!

Result: Juahir hires a special someone to show Arihnda a good time!

12 Red Heron

Idea: @star-wars-rebels-4 is always an amazing wealth of ideas for Grand Inquisitor, and encouraged a work featuring him and Kanan.

Result: Delicious back alley smut when an undercover Jedi is caught!

13 Warm Homecoming

Idea: Give my and a friend's OCs some cute fluff.

Result: OC fluff and a vacation to Hoth!

14 sowing the seeds

Idea: Add something cute to the spank war project.

Result: Another contender for my ‘favorite thing I’ve ever written’ rank. Two chapters of pining, cooking lessons, and sweet slick smut.

15 Red Frost

Idea: After watching “The Evil of Frankenstein” with @sneakybunyip ‘s amazing movie night group, I wanted to do something fun with Victor and Hans.

Result: A fun little adventure fic with some huddling for warmth to boot. Victor and Hans are the hammer-horror-verse Thranto send tweet.

16 a setting sun to hide the ruins

Idea: What if I tortured Kanan to the point he turned evil and joined the Inquisitors (and went a little insane in the process)

Result: Instead of torture, let’s just use some serum that drives him mad. Perfect. Smut ahoy, pretty much a dead dove type fic.

17 Pinktown

Idea: When browsing abandoned towns in Florida, I came across Flamingo… what if Thrawn had been exiled here instead.

Result: An alternate history of Thrawn’s exile and eventual discovery by the Empire. Huge thanks for @badgerandk on this one for the perfect epilogue and beta.

18 the sun rises to only illuminate the stranger i have become

Idea: Setting sun… part 2! But it’s actually what happens before sun?

Result: How Kanan ended up where he is for ‘a setting sun’... lots of imp smut and again, it's sort of a dead dove style fic.

19 Frozen Over

Idea: Ar’alani x Eli Vanto

Result: Somehow me and my writing partner ended up at sensory deprivation focus on this one.

20 Shape of Honor

Idea: Well, this one started in 2018 but ‘finished’ in 2019. Still working on the epilogue. Lots of tweaks… If you are not familiar, this is my AU in which it explores how the Thrawn novel and Rebels show would be altered if Palpatine distrusted Thrawn from their first meeting and accused him of being a Chiss spy. Vaguely inspired by the film The Shape of Water.

Result: Well it's nearly a novel now, isn’t it. This was a great adventure in learning how to create compelling story arcs. I’m extremely satisfied with how it is shaping (lol) up.

21 Datura Stamonium

Idea: Thrawnbine ovi smut.

Result: Oops it has plot now, a whole backstory with Eli and such and so fourth. Will need further stories told…

22 Desert Entropy

Idea: Luke/Wedge modern AU shenanigans.

Result: Also pulled Nath/Wyl and the Rogue Squad/Alphabet Squad peeps into this. Set in Vegas, Luke and Wedge meet and have a cute little romance, but some legal troubles set them back (Palpatine, as always, is That Bitch™) Very happy ending!

23 The Great Eli and Thrawn Prank War

Idea: See Chapter 1: Mullet Thrawn

Result: This thing really grew up, and thanks to all the contributors for allowing me to join in! My contributions were: 7-Bombs Away! In which a bit of drama brews and Thrawn makes a paint bomb that forces him and Eli back into being roomates. 11-Tooka Troube 2: Electric Boogaloo in which Eli finds his quarters slowly filling up with Tooka plush toys, and then something huge goes off in supply. 17-The Bitch is Back In which who knew Thrawn could sing?!

24 Clipped Wings to Keep Us from Flying

Idea: Continuing the story line from Caged Like Prized Birds

Result: Dragging Eli and the OG Thrawn into this, seeing that their stories were left untold in the first work. Also Armitage and the clone are up to all sorts of cool things. Still a WIP, on the list to keep working on this year!

25 I’ll do what I can.

Idea: Some Ronan/Krennic feels post Treason

Result: A Ronan character study that I really needed to get out of my system and finally a stable alliance between Krennic and Thrawn!

26 Purple Heron

Idea: @punk--kenobi and I concocted some fun Kanan/Zeb/Hera smut featuring Lasat heat cycles.

Result: Ah this came out so cool, full of emotion and wonderful imagery. Massive kudos to @punk--kenobi for beta-ing my portion and contributing some of the best smut one can find!

27 Ninjago Angst Week 2019

Idea: Do some 1-shots for Ninjago Angst Week

Result: ow right in the feels. Each character got a highlight in their own ‘dark retelling of a canon or canon adjacent event’ chapter.

28 Vertigo

Idea: Thing’s don’t go right planetside for Eli, Pik, and Waffle in Treason.

Result: Big oof. I hope Eli can one day forgive me… I even put strain on the end game Thranto! Bittersweet ending and lots of angst.

29 More Than Just a Treat

Idea: What is Obi Wan up to in the desert…

Result: Aunt Beau and baby Luke baked him cookies obviously!

30 Datura Metel

Idea: Continuing the Datura cycle…

Result: Just how Eli ended up where he did in the first installation.

31 Here & Now

Idea: Some Thranto Fluff! For @jewelliffer

Result: A camping trip for shore leave! And a marriage proposal for extra sugar.

32 Monster Under the Bed

Idea: Benevolent Boogeyman Chiss

Result: Modern AU Thranto spooky sillies. Bit of an intense climax but they talk it out!

33 Haunted by Sentiment

Idea: Nath is in denial of being the Squad Dad for @glassprowlers

Result: Nath’s very bad no good oh so terrible day! It's very silly and I really like how it ended up, the title is way more serious than the story itself XD

34 Pulse

Idea: Werewolf AU Lavashipping

Result: Oops Kai is a werewolf! Good thing Cole is here to help him figure out how to press on.

35 Stories from Area 51

Idea: remember the raid Area 51 meme? I do! Gotta clap them alien cheeks!

Result: Oh no it got PLOTTY! Pretty much all of my favorite characters and ships cherry-picked and plopped down into a Men In Black style facility in the middle of the desert. I really have a thing for the desert huh…

36 Good Day

Idea: The “truth” behind the “Good day, Lieutenant Vanto” from Thrawn in Treason.

Result: Oh stars the FEELS! Thrawn is in deep water and he KNOWS IT! GAH!

37 Fur Ball

Idea: Chiss are mogwai/gremlins…

Result: Silly Thranto fluff. Thrass shows up too! Feeding them after midnight is actually a good idea here… Grow your own ideal man!

38 Came Back Haunted

Idea: A mission fic centered around the @peters-pumpkin-day prompts.

Result: Ice planet survival with Tarkin, Krennic, Galen, and Ronan.

39 Sewn Together

Idea: This drawing actually is what lead to the fic-

Result: A fairly unique reuniting of Thrawn and Eli after both return to the Ascendancy.

40 Spiked Heron

Idea: Oh no… Kanan gets himself in deep poodoo this time.

Result: Devaronians really like humans huh? The next chapter is half way written I swear it is coming soon!

41 A Colder Embrace

Idea: Thrawn/Purrgil/Ezra and Luke/Wampa for SW Rare Pairs.

Result: It's very cold on Hoth… and even colder in space.

42 Surround

Idea: Luke/Wedge for SW Rare Pairs

Result: Luke has to confront Wedge post ESB regarding what is, essentially, his deserting the Rebels.

43 What Happens Planetside…

Idea: Eli/Pik/Waffle for SW Rare Pairs

Result: heheh a scrumptious Eli sandwich! And surprise tentacles because, well, why not?

44 Hesperidium

Idea: Fluffy Kylux for the Kylux Secret Santa event

Result: Ah its so sweet you might get a cavity

45 Reanimator

Idea: Lovecraftian eldritch horror Thranto

Result: This is the sort of project that it takes 2 months to fine tune each chapter, so bear with me, but I can promise a wonderful, creepy ride is ahead!

46 Floral

Idea: Luke/Faro for SW Rare Pairs. Enjoy the Jedi lovin’, @myevilmouse

Result: Sex pollen and accidentally defecting from the Empire. Whoops!

47 The Harch

Idea: Bouncing off of THIS art by @mamidlo , we worked together to create this plot. Very much inspired by the Hammer Horror films, such as Dracula and Frankenstein.

Result: A fun and spooky romp of Kallus and Zeb getting trapped in a creepy castle featuring mind controlled drones and a species-obsessed Harch. This was my first time posting the entire story at once, too!

Wow, I can not believe how much has been written this year. Thank you all again for reading and kudos-ing and your amazing comments. I’d not be here without the support and love <3 Cheers to 2020 and much more fic ahead!

[heisthq]

you all certainly didn’t make this easy on me — it was an incredibly tough decision for many of the roles. there were THIRTY-EIGHT applications for only ELEVEN roles, which is insane, and please know that every single one was incredible. i’m only one person on the internet, and this decision is in no way a reflection of the quality of your writing ( seriously, i know i just said it, but i’m kind of shocked by how good every single app was ). i’m so grateful for all the love heist has gotten, and i couldn’t be happier with the beautiful submissions i received ! from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

for those of you who were accepted, please follow the checklist, familiarize yourself with your fellow members, & review the triggers list. once your blog is set up, please send it in to the main within 24 hours so i can send you a link to the discord server. 

but enough talking — the newest members of HEISTHQ can be found under the cut !

welcome, DEDE ! you have been accepted as THE BLEEDING HEART, otherwise known as JUDY FAULKNER PRYCE ( ELIZABETH OLSEN ).

good god. what a way to start off acceptances — judy reached into my heart and took it for herself, and i’m not upset about it in the slightest. her gruff outer shell, still with that instinctive need to help, to do something, is so bleeding heart, and i ached at every step of the way through her journey. i knew i was really in for it when i dedicated a skeleton to loss itself, but you spun that concept into a living, breathing person and shot her back at me. i’ll happily let her knock me down any day, and i know she certainly will as soon as she makes her way onto the dash.

welcome, CHERRY ! you have been accepted as THE CAREER CRIMINAL, otherwise known as MISCHA DOSTOYEVSKY ( NATASHA LIU BORDIZZO ).

though you made my decision very difficult with that eleventh hour app, i couldn’t stop coming back to mischa. from the beginning of her childhood crimes to her current position as the head of the motherfucking bratva, she pulled me in and got me hook, line, and sinker. you painted such a brilliant picture of her that i felt she was going to jump off the page at any moment — and that last line of her bio ? chills. literal chills. finally, i have now decided their next heist is going to be stealing lip gloss from claire’s, shoutout to mischa for that hot idea. all in all, she’s an absolute delight, and i cannot wait to have her here. 

welcome, REED ! you have been accepted as THE EYE IN THE SKY, otherwise known as INDIANA “INDIE” ASCENCIO ( ANA DE ARMAS, BUT ONLY WITH PINK HAIR ).

okay, first of all, are you kidding me with that bio structure ? that was the coolest shit i’ve ever seen. what a way to kick it off for the eye in the sky — i said break the stereotype and you said bet. indie is an absolute gem of a character, as stunning as she is valuable, and damn if she doesn’t know it. she’s so vibrant that i could practically hear her voice when i read your answers to the prompts; i’m still howling at thirty five pages of criminal offenses. the eye in the sky needed to take me by the throat to show me who they are; you broke down the door and said here she is. i couldn’t be more honored to have her.

welcome, NOAH ! you have been accepted as THE GETAWAY DRIVER, otherwise known as CARLISLE “JACE” JACOBI HARRISON-SHEA ( CYRUS AMINI ).

the getaway driver was, arguably, the toughest choice i had to make — but i couldn’t help myself. jace drew me back in every single time like a moth to a flame, and i know he’d read that fact with that same, secret little smirk. every moment of reading your app is exciting, like i’m white-knuckled in jace’s passenger seat, along for whatever twists and turns his psyche brings, which was exactly what i was looking for. there are too many incredible quotes to put in one acceptance post, but one such example is stunningly simple: you weren’t just running. you were chasing. i posed a question in the getaway driver’s skeleton, and with one quick pivot, you took my breath away. just... wow. that’s all.

welcome, MARS ! you have been accepted as THE HIRED GUN, otherwise known as ASLAN “MAZZIE” YILMAZ ( ALPEREN DUYMAZ ).

mars, i’m gonna be honest, i hate you a little bit ( but not really. i love you ). i’m pretty sure forcing me to choose between two stunning apps should count as some sort of personal attack, but after much agonizing, i’m delighted to settle with the absolute tragedy that is my newest son mazzie. there’s a quiet power, a quiet ( but no less imposing ) threat threaded throughout his story, and somehow you managed to weave my own heartstrings into the picture alongside it all. you sent me tumbling head over heels for this man who, in his own words, is death himself. you gave me my hired gun, and he’s everything i dreamed. thank you.

welcome, LUCY ! you have been accepted as THE INSIDE MAN, otherwise known as IVY WANG ( GEMMA CHAN ).

lucy. lucy !!! you didn’t make it easy on me, but man, i couldn’t be more wrapped around ivy’s finger, which is probably just how she’d like it. the structure of your app was so interesting & unique ( that arrest report ?? HOT ). she encapsulates the inside man so perfectly — from her mannerisms to her motivations, everything was so spot on that i’m pretty sure you reached inside my brain to pull out my exact vision. she feels so real, so human and so powerful all at once, and i would personally let her arrest me and write her a thank you note for putting me in jail. i’m obsessed. obsessed !

welcome, BEE ! you have been accepted as THE MASTERMIND, otherwise known as BISHOP LEE ( CHOI MINHO ).

my beautiful mastermind is no longer mine — he’s yours, bee, every inch, and i couldn’t be happier about it. from his recruitment log ( which was !!! you wove his voice into it so perfectly ) to his reasoning for creating the group in the first place, bishop is someone i didn’t expect, but i adore him, shaping his little family & leaving behind a legacy he can be proud of ( “so bishop acts like they’re immortal, because he truly believes they are. it’s just his version of immortality is in the history books rather than an eternally beating heart.” are you KIDDING ??? ). please don’t take him from me — i don’t want to let him go. 

welcome, MIA ! you have been accepted as THE NEW KID ON THE BLOCK, otherwise known as MARTY CHOI ( KANG MINA ).

listen, i’m pretty relieved i didn’t get another app for this character, because i didn’t need one — marty is the new kid, through and through. she has that hunger that is so quintessential for this role, the drive and ambition for something more in this grand universe of ours. it’s so perfectly exemplified by marty’s own words: let me be excellent at something again. let me be proud of my own capabilities again. let me be part of something so i'll stop feeling so alone. this !! this is so perfect i almost jumped out of my skin reading it. thank you for bringing me our perfectly imperfect new kid — i can’t wait to see her in action.

welcome, LEXI ! you have been accepted as THE SECOND IN COMMAND, otherwise known as PERCY BANKS ( BRENTON THWAITES ).

holy shit, lexi. holy shit !! from the moment i saw “STATUS: deceased” at the beginning of your app, i knew i was in for a wild ride — but i had no idea what truly awaited me. from percy’s humble beginnings through his ambitious rise to hotshot fbi agent ( speaking of, can you say hot fucking take to have him as ex-fbi ? i’m floored ), i was hooked into the twists and turns of his story, my jaw dropping when i realized who jupiter was after all. the highs and lows of his first foray into the world of heists had me on the edge of my seat, and i truly cannot wait to see what percy does next — because at this rate, who knows where he’ll end up ? i’m excited to find out !

welcome, HANNAH ! you have been accepted as THE STAR OF THE SHOW, otherwise known as STRIKER KIM ( CHARLES MELTON ).

god, hannah — break my heart, why don’t you ? as each tidbit of striker’s past fell into place, that’s what you did, and i’m aching for this boy who’s just trying to stay alive ( and live as much as he can while he still is ). though the star could be played in so many different ways, you took this role an entirely different direction, and suffice to say it blew me away. literally, your mind. exhibit a — you didn���t go running to high society for fame or fortune, no. it was your insurance policy — god, striker !! he’s such a complex, heartbreaking character, and i can’t wait to see him on the dash. he may have a hand in two different worlds of crime, but he’s also got a place in my heart, and god knows he could use the love. also, making me crack a code just to understand your bio headings ? touché. i deserved that.

welcome, ELLIE ! you have been accepted as THE WATCHDOG, otherwise known as THEA JAIN ( NAOMI SCOTT ).

the watchdog requires a delicate balance: soft edges bathed in steel, a gentle person capable of terrible things. it can be a tough image to capture, but i shouldn’t have worried. your entire app painted a picture of this exact person, tugging at my heartstrings until the very end: remember that you are thea jain, and that you are a good person. you are kind. you are loved. and you are in control. that was it — just like thea’s fifth rule to round out the reminders of her morality, you completely sealed the deal. the way she cares for the team, baking for them and occasionally mothering them, exposes that soft underbelly guarded by her quiet yet surprising strength and power. you’ve made a beautiful character, ellie. i can’t thank you enough for bringing her to me.