#Secret-Diary-of-an-FA

[secret-diary-of-an-fa]

Doctor Who: The Star Beast- A Reasonably Watchable Mess

You may have noticed that, despite desperately positive, brittle reviews in the mainstream media, the last few years of Doctor Who went down like a lead balloon with actual fans and ordinary viewers. Turns out that a patronising gender-flip that served no plot purpose followed by a series of episodes in which the Doctor shilled for Space Amazon, murdered innocent giant spiders and delivered completely unearned straight-to-camera speeches like a fucking after-school special weren’t popular moves. The show’s viewing figures plummetted (despite contrary claims from the BBC that turned out, very simply, to be lies) and its review score aggregate on Rotten Tomatoes plunged, at one point, to literally 0%. Hilariously, the review aggregate from the mainstream media was around 90% at the time, once again demonstrating that the average critic can be bought for less than I spend assuring the silence of my past victims (the joke is that all my past victims are dead and I don’t spend a fucking thing on their silence). The abject failure of the Whitaker/Chibnall era was inevitable and any normal person could have predicted it. The BBC, however, didn’t and had a bit of a panic when they realised just how fucked their ratings were. Not that they admitted that, of course, but the fact they brought back the dream-team of showrunner Russell ‘The’ Davies and David Tennant for the 60th Anniversary Specials instead of letting the current incumbents stick around until after the anniversary kinda speaks volumes. So, now we’re getting three Anniversary specials, starring Tennant and helmed by Davies. The first one’s out, and it falls on me to review it as fairly as possible. So… how is it?

Well, put it this way: it’s not terrible, but it’s not the confident, unapologetic return to form I was hoping for either. It concerns a minor villain from the old DW comics called Beep the Meep who poses as a cute, furry critter while secretly plotting the genocide of the entire universe, a reunion with Catherine Tate’s always-delightful Donna Noble and a resolution to the Human/Time Lord meta-crisis that nearly straight-up killed her last time she was on-screen. And, in fairness, the stuff that works works pretty well. The jokes are funny, Tennant and Tate are excellent in their respective roles, the Meep is gloriously fucking psychotic (though the voice actor does sound like they’re phoning it in a bit) and Yasmin Finney, playing Donna’s trans daughter, is a lot less insufferable than she would have been if Chibnall had written her lines. I actually thought the bit where Donna threatens to “descend” on some kids who dead-name her in the street was well-handled and pretty accurately captured the protective instincts of a parent with a trans daughter. Mainly, she’s just there for the representation, though, and does the square root of bugger all to advance the plot. That’s probably a mercy, since I suspect the show would have had a hard time disguising the fact that this fifteen year old kid is being played by a twenty year old woman (who seems to have borrowed David Bowie’s cheekbones) if her part was any more prominent. But yeah- it’s a fun, knockabout adventure that doesn’t overstay its welcome and doesn’t try to outdo the entire show up to that point just because its been a completely arbitrary 60 years since the first episode. It’s basically fun and basically fine. It’s destined to be lauded to ludicrous excess by a mainstream media who are terrified of offering a proper critique because it’s got a trans person in it, while simultaneously being shat upon by online reviewers who know they can win easy points with the fans by challenging the suffocating ubiquity of the Standard Approved Opinion. In truth, though, it’s neither great nor awful- it’s just an hour of television that’s worth watching once but only once. It contains some good stuff… and some shite stuff.

Ah yes, the shite. That’s what you came to read about, isn’t it? Nobody in their right mind shows up at my blog-step for kind words and understanding: you come here because you know I have the pithiest insults and pissiest hot-takes. And yes: there’s some real fucking garbage to dunk on here. First of all, the Human/Time Lord meta-crisis gets resolved in the dumbest fucking way possible. For those of you who don’t remember, the ending of Modern Season 4 of DW was one of the most heartbreaking things ever attempted in a show designed for family viewing. Donna took on the consciousness of a Time Lord in order to save the universe but nearly burnt out her synapses in the processes. The Doctor wiped her mind to save her life, and then had to leave, because if she ever remembered him or the adventures they’d shared together, the crisis would reassert itself and her brain would overload, killing her. And the way they get around this, initially, is alright. Because Donna had a child, part of the meta-crisis got passed onto her, allowing two minds to take a strain that would kill just one. It’s a sweet and perfectly acceptable way of sorting a complex problem and something that legitimately wouldn’t have occurred to the Doctor at the time, because he had to come up with a solution that would work in the moment, not something that would require a nine month gestation period. But then, for some stupid fucking reason, they took it one step further and had Donna and her daughter simply relinquish the power of the meta-crisis, handwaving the obvious bullshit-ness of this move by claiming it just wouldn’t have occurred to a male-presenting Time Lord. The Doctor’s not an idiot. If that was an option, it would have occurred to him. Fuck, it did occur to him that one time Rose Tyler absorbed the Time Vortex and he had her give it up, channelling it into him to save her life at the cost of forcing a regeneration. It’s simultaneously contrived and slap-dash- a hasty right-on girl-power moment that fails miserably to play by the rules and cheapens the original story of the meta-crisis retroactively. It also brings us, neatly, to the phrase ‘male-presenting Time Lord’.

There’s a line in the excellent It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia wherein Charlie describes himself as “a straight man who poops transgender”. The phrase ‘male-presenting Time Lord’ sounds weirdly similar to me. It’s too specific and technical, while also including a wildly silly element (‘Time Lord’ is a vaguely ethereal, grandiose title that doesn’t gel with earthly, human discussions of gender identity). People just don’t talk like that. Sometimes people write like that, seeking an economy of phrasing that looks good on the page… but nobody actually talks like that. I mean, the context in which it’s used is stupid, but the phrasing itself is stupider. It’s also emblematic of a problem with the script as a whole. It feels like a first draught.

What do I mean by that? Well, there’s just a lot of instances where conversations feel slightly stilted or opportunities are missed. Case in point, there’s a bit where Donna’s discussing her kid growing up with her own mum, and it feels like it was meant to be a poignant discussion of the trials and tribulations of raising a child and then realising that they’re not what you were expecting but their own, completely separate person. What we get is just a placeholder where a couple of jokes occur but nothing of import is really said. Similarly, there’s a line where the Doctor muses that he doesn’t know who he is any more, which feels like it was meant to be developed into a meditation on his sense of identity after so many regenerations, metatextually addressing the show’s loss of a coherent, inter-regenerational identity for its lead character. Absolutely fucking nothing comes of it. There’s even a bit where a UNIT scientific advisor in a wheelchair encounters a flight of stairs and the way it’s shot makes it feel like there should have been a joke there. Maybe there could have been a really slow lift that she has to use while her soldiers rush up the stairs, or maybe she could have made one of them carry her. I’d have taken a lazy, low-hanging quip like “stairs…. My old nemesis” to be honest. But all we get is “sorry about the stairs,” and that’s it. My point is that there’s a superficiality to a lot of the scenes and lines that yells ‘PLACEHOLDER’, and areas that desperately need polish.

Speaking of polish: London is once again too fucking clean. I wish TV shows would stop doing that- making London look like the MCU’s version of fucking New York- all glass skyscrapers and clean streets. The real London is a bizarre, dystopian mix of impersonal steel monuments to capital, crumbling baroque architecture from the middling-glorious past and slumping, poverty-stricken housing from a fucking Dickens novel. The city has a really specific, slightly nightmarish character that most telly shows and films fail miserably to capture. It’s inexcusable in this case, because Doctor Who actually used to do a pretty good job of showing London as it is. Which is mental, since it used to be filmed in Swansea in cocking Wales.

But I digress. My final major issue is that the message of the show’s text is wildly at odds with the metatextual message of the specials’ mere existence. The whole reason the BBC re-hired Tennant and Davies onto the show was to announce a return of the Who everyone loved; a tacit admission than the last few years of lazy virtue-signalling and shoddy script-work had been a mistake that they were keen to move on from. There is literally no other reason to take such an obvious backward step in the show’s development. Yet the episode The Star Beast keeps bringing up Whitaker’s tenure as the Doctor as though it’s something to be celebrated. We get lines like “The Doctor’s a man and a woman. And both. And neither. And more,” (again, nobody fucking talks like that) that feel like an attempt to fold the previous three years into the acceptable canon, when the whole reason the specials are happening is to renounce them and leave them in the cold. Then again, that’s the Beeb for you- it's amazing if the left hand knows what the left hand's doing. If someone's bothered to inform the right hand, it's so surprising as to be frankly suspicious. Add to that the extra layer of complexity that comes from getting Disney to part-fund the show and you’re bound to end up with a confused mess. Also, why did they bother getting Disney to part-fund this? The Special Effects look like something a fourteen year-old could whip up in his bedroom. Which is fine- I never mind the sets wobbling in Who: I just can’t figure out where all the fucking money went.

I think the root problem is two-fold. First, as much as I loved Russell T. Davies’ original time as showrunner, it’s really obvious he’s gotten old. It’s only been fifteen years since his time in charge ended, but sometimes, the ageing process kicks a guy’s arse really suddenly (ask me about waking up one day to discover I now have man-boobs sometime). There’s this interview he did recently about how Davros represents an offensive portrayal of wheelchair users, and it’s clearly just the ramblings of a confused old man. Nobody looks at Davros, creator of the Daleks, and thinks ‘yup- there goes a typical wheelchair user’. Part of the point of his character is that he’s kind of admirable on paper, overcoming age and sickness to achieve the impossible… but he perverts and subverts those expectations by doing something fucking appalling. It’s a nuanced, complex take on the way pain and suffering can make a person sympathetic without necessarily redeeming them. And Russel T. Davies, a once-talented writer who should understand this stuff, just doesn’t get it any more. He’s well-meaning, but he’s clearly just not up to the job any more. I mean, he still has talent- his renewed tenure will be better than Chibnall’s… but maybe it would have been a better idea to let the poor schmuck retire on a high note.

The other problem is deeper and more intractable. The world has changed since Doctor Who was the best thing on television, and it might be that it just can’t work any more. The modern era of Who was born from a place of hope yet, also, a place of marginalisation. It was 2005. The government of the day had dome some pretty fucked up things, but they were nowhere near as evil as the governments who were to succeed them. Sci-fi was still a niche thing allowing for experimentation and weirdness. There were definite good guys and bad guys on the world stage and in domestic politics: there were genuine victims on one side and hateful bigots on the other, and it seemed like it might actually be possible for the underdogs to win for a change. 2023 is a different world. We’ve seen the worst UK governments since Thatcher in the 80s (and people kept voting for them) and the worst US President in history (a Savaloy-orange freak with the hair of a sexually-confused Nazi). On the cultural level, the lines between victims and villains have blurred, with the arrival of the never-ending Oppression Olympics birthing a generation of dead-eyed bullies who hide behind nominal ‘oppressed’ status in order to tear down genuinely nice people (like that time a load of wankers piled onto a scientist who landed a probe on a moving comet FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HUMAN HISTORY because he did while wearing a T-shirt with a stylised naked lady on it). Identity has replaced solidarity as the go-to discussion in progressive (or allegedly progressive) circles. The sci-fi genre itself has become popular- meaning it’s infested with normies who don’t understand it but do want to own it. Doctor Who was never built for this world. The change in culture and society over the last just-under-twenty years is more significant, in some ways, than the changes that occurred between its original outing in the 60s and its reboot in 2005, and I don’t know if it can survive those changes. We inhabit a world where actual heroism and even basic decency seem less important than the performance of those qualities in ways that a mass audience can understand and where nuanced solutions, informed by kindness, are verboten because everyone’s supposed to pick a side. There’s no room for a genteel, British/Alien gadabout with two hearts and a silly sonic screwdriver in a world where the battle-lines are drawn and performative virtue has become a universal aspiration. In order to fit our tawdry world, Doctor Who would have to stop being Doctor Who. And, to be blunt, our culture doesn’t really deserve any form of Doctor Who at the moment.

So yes, The Star Beast is pretty good. It’s a nice slice of television that fails on many fronts, but still manages to entertain. But what next? Where can we possibly go from here? Personally, I intend to watch the specials and- if they’re okay- Ncuti Gatwa’s era after that. Then I think I’m done. By rights, the show should face cancellation while it’s still strong enough to bow out gracefully, but if that doesn’t happen, I’ll still have to pick a point to stop watching. Sooner or later, all good things must come to an end, and if the BBC isn’t big enough to admit that, at least I am. I suggest you pick somewhere to draw a line, too.

[secretdiaryofanfa]

I Bet You Thought You'd Seen the Last of Me!

So, with the original Secret Diary of a Fat Admirer either temporarily suspended or permanently defunct, depending on whether Tumblr can recover my account, I'm establishing this hybrid abomination as either a place-holder or a replacement. Expect, y'know, the usual: a long, harrowing look into the convulsing vortex of our dying culture, punctuated by knob jokes and plugs for my books, both extant (Small Infinities, available as a free download from Culture Matters) and upcoming (Warning: Infohazard, due out with X Press later this year). I'll be taking some time over the next few days to make this space as palatable to look at as possible, as well as splurge some as-yet-unpublished stuff at you. Hopefully, I'll find some of my old peeps or they'll find me. Hopefully I'll pick up some new freaks, too. Who knows. This could be the start of a beautiful friendship... with a bunch of lurking internet perverts who only want me for personal data. More anon. Until then, piss off.

[musezieren]

A rewrite of Act II's Tollhouse

The Tollhouse stands as a grand, imposing structure, more mansion than mere office. Originally built to handle the mundane tasks of toll collection and paperwork, it quickly evolved under the influence of Lady Gerringothe Thorm. Unwilling to be confined to a humble workplace, she expanded the Tollhouse into an opulent mansion, claiming it was necessary to impress merchants and travelers passing through Reithwin Town. The building's grandeur masked the corruption and dark dealings within, its lavish facade concealing the sinister reality of Gerringothe’s insatiable greed and the horrors lurking in its depths.

Introduction:

In the desolate Shadowlands, hope is a scarce commodity, confined to the sanctuary of the Last Light Inn, protected by the divine power of Selune. The land is a wasteland of ruins, haunted specters, and memory orbs filled with nothing but grief. As the party embarks on their journey towards Moonlight Tower, they will encounter the ominous Tollhouse. Upon crossing its threshold, they are engulfed by a blinding light and the maniacal laughter of an unseen entity, setting the stage for a nightmarish ordeal.

Main Quest: The Tollhouse of Illusions

Upon opening their eyes, the party finds themselves no longer in a ruin but in a grandiose Tollhouse, part bank, part mansion. The opulent interior is adorned with gold and lavish decorations. Chandeliers of glass and gold illuminate a hall filled with masked guests and a haunting orchestra. To their shock, the party’s attire has transformed to match the setting—some wear luxurious gowns and suits, while others are garbed as servants.

They are greeted and either welcomed as honored guests or hurried to assist in the kitchen for Lady Gerringothe’s grand birthday banquet. Attempts to break the illusion result in searing headaches, and any deviation from their assigned roles is met with freezing stares that evoke primal fear. The exit is sealed, trapping them in this eerie masquerade.

To escape, they must uncover the dark secret of the Tollhouse, expose Lady Gerringothe's corruption, and bring her to justice.

Parts of the Quest:

Talking to the NPCs:

Servants: Only those in servant roles can converse with the servants, who speak of the ongoing war, missing family members, and subtle hints about Gerringothe’s corruption. Whispers of something terribly wrong in the basement may also surface.

Nobles: Nobles will engage with those in noble or merchant roles, expressing relief at the distraction from the dreary war. The war has not yet impacted the upper class, who complain mainly about distracted servants.

Merchants: With enough persuasion, merchants reveal their fear of Gerringothe and their entrapment in Reithwin Town. They mention the mysterious disappearances of those who could no longer pay for their stay.

Finding Evidence:

Gerringothe's Office: Search the ledger for proof of Gerringothe extorting more toll than Ketheric ordered, and find a diary filled with her curses against him.

Basement Horrors: The true horrors lie in the basement—where holding cells house servants in a state of half-lucidity, their limbs, faces, and insides grotesquely transforming into gold as if afflicted by a horrific illness. In other cells, piles of mutilated corpses lie, their bodies robbed of limbs and organs. The party can release these tortured souls from their suffering and search the bodies for lockets, papers, and other forms of evidence. Further exploration reveals a macabre vault filled with gold, jewelry, and golden body parts—the grim remnants of an unfinished spell intended to transform entire bodies into gold. This chilling discovery exposes the full extent of Lady Gerringothe's malevolent sorcery and the atrocities committed within the Tollhouse.

Judging Gerringothe:

With sufficient evidence, the party can disrupt the ball, claiming to be sent by Ketheric or a merchant guild. Presenting the evidence, they must confront Gerringothe and force her to face the consequences. This can be achieved through persuasive speech checks, making her realize her downfall, or through combat.

Upon her defeat, the servants, merchants, and ghosts of the basement’s victims will bow with smiles of release, and the Tollhouse will revert to its ruined state.

Conclusion:

The eerie glamour dissipates, leaving the party standing in the dilapidated remnants of the Tollhouse. The ghosts are at peace, and the dark chapter of Gerringothe’s reign of terror is finally closed. The party is free to continue their quest, having uncovered and vanquished one of the malevolent forced that haunted Reithwin Town.

Alternative Ending:

A different method might involve confronting Gerringothe in secret and blackmailing her for gold and safe passage without paying a toll. This morally dubious choice ensures the party's escape but leaves the souls tied to the Tollhouse, forever trapped in the endless illusion. This selfish decision condemns countless spirits to an eternal nightmare, their suffering a haunting reminder of the price of greed and cowardice.

[girl-tips]

[asitrita]

This is why Måneskin is definitely my go-to band when I'm in a Law x Cora mood. The entire lyrics of these songs are perfect for bit-insane-but-deeply-in-love Law x Rosi, but these verses are just pure perfection.

"Give me a command, and I'll do what you ask 'Cause my favorite music's your "Uh, uh" Give me a command, and I'll do what you ask 'Cause I love when you sing out loud

Oh, mamma-mamma mia, spit your love on me I'm on my knees, and I can't wait to drink your rain I'll keep it secret if you let me get a taste Tell me your limit, and we'll cross the line again Oh, mamma-mamma mia"

Mammamia - Måneskin

"Ed anche quando starò male e sarò troppo stanco Come fuoco avanzerò per prender tutto quanto Ciò che spetta è d'esser pronto ad affrontare il branco Non voglio tornare indietro, adesso parto Allora baby, baby, baby, asciuga il pianto Bevi, bevi, bevi, bevi dal mio piatto Sì, tu puoi cadere in piedi anche dall'alto Sì, tu puoi cadere in piedi anche dall'alto E amore accanto a te, baby, accanto a te Io morirò da re, eh-yeah Amore accanto a te, baby, accanto a te Io morirò da re, eh-yeah"

Morirò da re (I'll die like a king) - Måneskin

"I wanna be your slave, I wanna be your master I wanna make your heartbeat run like rollercoasters I wanna be a good boy, I wanna be a gangster 'Cause you can be the beauty and I could be the monster

...

'Cause I'm the devil who's searching for redemption And I'm a lawyer who's searching for redemption And I'm a killer who's searching for redemption A motherfucking monster who's searching for redemption"

I wanna be your slave - Måneskin

"So tell me what you want, I'll give you what you want, baby Tell me what you want, I'll give you what you want, baby Tell me what you want, I'll give you what you want, baby Tell me what you want, I'll give you what you want

Because baby, for your love, I'll do whatever you want For your love, I'll do whatever you want I'll do whatever you want, for your love"

For your love - Måneskin

"Per imparare a perdonare tutte le mie colpe Perché anche gli angeli, a volte, han paura della morte Che mi è rimasto un foglio in mano e mezza sigaretta Corriamo via da chi c'ha troppa sete di vendetta Da questa Terra ferma perché ormai la sento stretta Ieri ero quiete perché oggi sarò la tempesta

Prima di te ero solo un pazzo, ora lascia che ti racconti Avevo una giacca sgualcita e portavo tagli sui polsi Oggi mi sento benedetto e non trovo niente da aggiungere Questa città si affaccerà quando ci vedrà giungere Ero in bilico tra l'essere vittima, essere giudice Era un brivido che porta la luce dentro le tenebre E ti libera da queste catene splendenti, lucide Ed il dubbio o no, se fossero morti oppure rinascite

Quindi Marlena torna a casa, che il freddo qua si fa sentire Quindi Marlena torna a casa, che non voglio più aspettare Quindi Marlena torna a casa, che il freddo qua si fa sentire Quindi Marlena torna a casa, che non voglio più sparire"

Torna a casa (Come back home) - Måneskin

"Counting the hours, counting the seconds 'Till I can feel your bones There is a diamond on your pillow When you're coming home

Alone, I've been waiting So long, it's true

Dance in your shoes, read your diary to Get inside of you, you, you Forever and ever and ever Cried on your nudes, wearing your perfume Now I taste like you, you, you Forever and ever and ever"

Read your diary - Måneskin

"We're gonna get sky-high and create a new world Where somebody might die, but nobody gets hurt And if it sounds good for you, baby, just say the word You will li-i-i-i-i-ike it (ah)

...

It's 5 AM We feel so good, it's almost frightening Let's try again I don't deserve you, you're a diamond

Meet me there where it never closes Meet me there where it's never hopeless All is fair in love, oh-oh-oh Honey, are you coming? Meet me there where it never closes Meet me there, I'll give you your roses All is fair in love, oh-oh-oh Honey, are you coming?"

Honey - Måneskin

"Crazy in love, daisy in bloom Black hearts for pupils, I'm pacing the room And I cover myself in tattoos of us And dream of the day we embrace and combust

All this love, I'm so choked up I can feel you in my blood All this lust for just one touch I'm so scared to give you up"

Valantine - Måneskin

"Bare your soul 'til it's naked Bite my lip 'til you break it Steal my heart, get it wasted Don't do it slow

If you're gonna set fire to the night Baby, let me be the lighter If you're already high and you wanna fly I'll be the hit that takes you higher If you wanna love when you touch the sky You can be my midnight rider If there's nowhere to go when you wanna go wild I wanna be the driver"

The Driver - Måneskin

"In my civilization, you're the king and the queen I'm praying at your altar, if you know what I mean ... So tell me what you've been missing I'll do anything to get you ticking And you might be the answer to the sinner in me ... Do you wanna, do you wanna own my mind, own my mind? Do you wanna, do you wanna all the time, all the time? Do you wanna know what the good, good, bad things all feel like? Yeah, do you wanna, do you wanna own my mind, own my mind?"

Own my mind - Måneskin

But seriously, you should listen to the entire songs, the entire lyrics fit twisted-bit-insane love LawxCora like a glove. Valantine, Read your diary and Own my mind are my particular favourites for these two, but whenever I listen to any fo these songs I can't help but think of them. Some Måneskin songs are also perfect for Doffy (Gossip), or Doffy & Law (La paura del buio and Gasoline). Special mentions to Coraline, which ending ("Non ha conosciuto l'amore / Ma un padre che di padre ha niente / Le han detto in città c'è un castello / Con mura talmente potenti / Che se ci vai a vivere dentro / Non potrà colpirti più niente") reminds me so much of child!Doffy wish to go back to Mary Geoise, but in general can also fit Law scape from Doffy's influence, and in general, from his own inner demons; and The Lonliest, which fits the three of them, Law, Doffy and Rosi, in relation to the first night after Doffy killed his brother. Also, from Rosi's perspective, the song Inside of You, In Spite of You by Thoushaltnot is just perfect, it reflects so well how Cora shaped Law mindset.

[blackdeathfan5]

charmdners morality system of enoch chart. for cahramdners cauldren wicca, and magie as to why its falsee wranigns based on you again.

chamdners grills, is the morality of chamdners cauldren, where its by buety points and pretty in pink, as to why elsa and anna have a monopoly off just likign them in alot of crafts but never even in and within disney, do they have a monopoly on amgie. it is improtent that pokemon i sreal in magie. Shut up you chse shitty stupid powers. It would never be alowd in magick. it is biggerr in brooms vr then charmnders aculdrena nd wicca. it is seen as real magie people and real magie characters of spirit they are as besats, that just dont look like the carton with many redraws per it, by generation with nitnedoe gneration 1, and origins looking very diffrent epscailyl on charmadner and pikachu. The histroy of magie, is it will just baes moralityies on you wihtout killing anyone of rewriten and falsely wrriten moralites. it will agree to slavery bieng owning others withotu cureses or hexes as the slave, and controllign them as the power, when mistaken for srevtor or servitsi the owend in magick. ANd its why somber with wicca strwbery milk tea hermtics and brooms vr, is not charmanders cauldren or shadwos to morgana all amgie systesm of time period, intializeed by how and why strawbrey milk tea grew, of seperating your sides to woe and woen of poession and unposesed, by histrical notisoan dtites, by bits and motis of irsladn and the rights to, by craft controling coresponts wrong alowd cus you tund in and chiemd into teh votes, of disrootiosn adn denatl of never dying now erased nad perfeclty arnged a transfer fully morality becuase it is jufieid by the pain i know we feel, rather then the right thign to do, aloweed with owning others nad pickign for them replaxinv hexing and curses becuase of hermpdite or male, steering the rains where hermpdite only magiee is usally, by and for, the systm of divine yuno known as hermitcs, and canot be extnded past it, as its a fagot thing based on worship in such a stron gway, that is rmeved the second it is magie, and isntead replaecd by other inteersts thte scond you have magie, to be not satan but the black arts, annd its only satan ffor those who do not have magie, or that satan chooses as a owlf off native ameirca. this as baudrism leaps of jest is a hosmtuck office called hary pottesr homestuck, meaning by way of nightamreish terrors as incoent cute baesed of fa curse to ntoice that aboout where kids and tunes and thier shows come from guka guka or muga muga, or muga kuga, and the hsitroy of muga muga, is that it is acurse based on the tv shows pokemons mamy depictions of ashy ketchum and hsi iisland, of age into protaits of noticing the evils everwyher ethat we hide incoent. which is all kids cartoons everr but to notice it as a form of awake while sleepign towards it even though awaka and sleepig is foor crafts ina ll ofamgie. woul be the songs o somberr,.

thest higns by dogs barking, insantiy by drablle is why curses have to protect magick and taiming balls charmnaders coaudlren of owning othesr and putting them under you as holding htem, until they are a slave the only people to engaee in this system morally corectly or they fall under a flame curse to be under teh tohers.

and by historically the eye opening sides, scrolls of historical time eprids, f what is meant to be what will happena nd what you singed and arnged, to be erased sellign evnets orr virustiy, to caues and or emadnale of your teainr gme apart lisa and the shoe i son the other foot, marking magee, not ever magick, as magick would just have hte arto f bowing to a hoby the ausmption of behding held as the spirist in the balls of conjuring, teh shitory of pokemon in magick is. that all fantasys are real even in magie. the histroy of that rule is that poekmone i sa drema relam emdia franhcise wherre you have to keep teh dream relam to keep an interst in it, and most wont read the secret diarie sloosin gpokemon asfter a few good runs.

and by histoically value and upties to these thigns a removed and in and out as holoerback sand doe adn sluts, to why it works and hw it shoudl be wiht teh temptaion to ruin others rmeved by being under a hobby or devoted t it, adn by heartache and break of buetiful boys, and the hsitory of this test in magick is known as galaith srun, a culture to the heartbreaks of sweet home alabma now marketed in goeriga as a franchise that will gain popularlity only because it domitnaets mgaie liek secret lif of a mermaid.

and hsitroicaly uptie and yule dog to hsitorical noitosn of vairey of legacy over and over again. You can just have a legacy in magie, you ahve to try and earn that imroaltiy and if it gets zpaed and edesuz ex machinama by word of god, its because we stole thte wrong sometign or sibling or historicals, and it wasnt really the rpice we had to pay all along.

By not all rpices are paid in amgie, but a ll burdens while doing adn just dooign teh art is with vegetbael a powerful stat eto achive like slave, in a really weird way where you woudnt be aginst it if you had the pitch.

wogiwoeijew

wgowoijgewogijweg

owigjjowjoewijgowigowgwoijwogijwoijiwegoiwgoijwegoiwjowijwgoijwgoiioiwgjio.

so no in magie to eran a lie state and know it you would choose an unrality. you would choos ethis unreality based on what geos hump in the night to the lvel o consnta projectle vomit and pill poping, you woudl choos the rbuden to englihtedn the night of it, and it would teach you no tto fear the mosnters as imposisbl ein the time perido galitay, you can be sexually attracted to evil and charmners cauldren will do this to you, but how you ask is the chiken broth and the soup of piplup as to how you treat others as sometign about you as to why it will instanly take a more pleasing form even outsiide fmaigck by you adressing it as skiskrpenic, by gas and fluids and inocently htes ethings conjured ro stomach pumpd warnigns becuase baby fox might thorw up, of standing ther ein your heart breaking, writing beutfiul ballads too, and be wiped rememred or erased, and playing forgniess like chirst beforee yu. where sins are craft and not real in religion till one specific one called sim numberr 5 maxamilion. or childish freind sins number 6 in charmadners cauldreen as sin number 5 sin maixmiliion as its whtehr or not its latin and tonks. teh hsitro yo fsin number 5 is that roudned abotu piflia is just wlling to be on the run, as talyl and keep check score of on system of magiee called casnadra, where good and evil as scales of gods and dinvity have a weigh tand balacne beecuase of the dream relam hence secret lifee of a emrmaid. and theset higns for and by soothee sayings and shamesn, and by historical lokc and esy sna guriadns alled rainbow gates. no in magie their is one sin in exintece that is real nad its abdongin someone cus long dsitnce spirit world only goodbyes are better for you and mean more makgin teh pain worht it by dedicing an r emoving ashley emmas facnlub fo rbutterbeeer. withotu a faiht or nation that all magies morality of goood and evil is baed on for good to choosee it and for evil to reject it with evil alway smoralyl corect but nasty and dark adn thigns for what they really are, and good to get the job done of what it feels to be gods and godeses on morality as incoene and viruste as fucked up but what apesn happesn asuming the right thing and becuas it would choseeo noramlity it is often but not alwys by ddeifinitn. and they are both divine masculnie as yin nad yang in maige, when appleid having fucked up evil idols of stolen time peridos to a coolro coresponding of rainbow witchery and gate oof the homstone or rarely but oor the eyes usrals magick, of colorblidn craft now real outside of it, to apply, th ehistorical valuements and resutemnts of jumgent cast unto otehrs which is not a chocie to fall to. unlike heavn or hell or misatkes of the ewish stars or hexx systesm caleld jugemtn crests in magick.

so no magick is a smaller craft taht grew into a magie system like wicca, and magick is not wicca. and magick is nto teh beall catch all fo rit. cahrmandesr cauldren outranks it until pokmeon or colors or light and arknes and good and evil on virustally all anatmoies to human rihgts, and that is charmnders only destition as what people asume hufflepuff is honest to god about. becuasaee of and by variety in and under, and hitorially wtih adn yule tide, the usher, and my histries under you. the history of being loyal to a concept is hat slavey is with games to dermien for yourself and others by no malciious intent and all macilisou intent by the time of one person tralved here ion will be and by fro knogelg, but the historiacls and histories to and fortune by song and bird and willow tree magie.

so no evil always wins not good, but good will always tirumph evil. with the base line for it in magie caleed malfoy, wiht costs not price, usualyl traped in other peoples bodesi as rights to ination, with rpice when paid a huge own or win of it becuas fo mr carbs from spongbob an the hsitorical tiedies upo of merging an dunmerrgin gwith cursest that devestated a life, rewitn and untwtintem by thos hwo choseo you like tom kenyn choosing krisham from spongbob who chose adam as the emprer.

so all off that as to why water trumps earth bending not fire breating and or fire bending depit teh oviobus tie and fire turmsp air and awater togheter by zaped out water praticlesa dn scortching flames and heats instead of just blcokign again dna gain of you jsut touch it you savd the life to get burend and oh god do you enjoy burnign now.

th eend.

o fa real orality in magie. base don magick before it. code words tarbery milktea.

[sparkledfirecracker]

WIP Game

Thank you @ghotifishreads for the tag. You can find the post here.

I’ve added a few more WIPs since the last time I played this. I think at this point there’s well over 100 WIPs in my docs. So I did make a selection, I left all my original works one out and kept it strictly fanfic based. It was fun to see some sitting in my docs since 2020/2021 untouched(no pun intended), but no desire or idea to finish them.

The rules given were as followed: Post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! Then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

I will change them a little, if you are curious to find out more about a title, ask me about it and I’ll share a little snippet or tell you about it if there’s literally only 1 line in it 🤣.

WIP LIST (under the cut, it’s a long one)

Daddy Academy - Ari - Our Little Secret incl 4 & 5

1 Daddy Academy - humping

2 Daddy Academy - wand voyeur

3 Daddy Academy - missionary

6 Daddy Academy- anal both ways

7 Daddy Academy - Somnophilia

M&H spin off Lloyd Hansen vs assassin- Becoming Mrs. Hansen

FA Freezy spin off M&H Good for You

FA M&H Nick spin off - New Beginnings

FA - Nick vs turtle - Love is a Verb

FA Nick & Turtle - The Night We Met

FA Andy - spin off M&H Waves

FA Andy - part 3

FA Pebbles backstory

MH spin-off Pete Brenner

FA Steve - spin off biker au M&H

FA Curtis part 2 - M&H spin off

FA Ari spin off M&H Wildest Dreams - Returning Home

FA Ari - spin-off part 2

FA Hayden - When the Phoenix Rises

FA Frank - spin-off M&H

FA Jake Jensen vs notes

FA Ari - prequel his POV

FA Mace & Needle - spin-off M&H

FA Johnny biker spin off

FA Colin spin-off M&H

FA Nick G vs babysitter

Gym Rats Olympic Winner Steve

Wellness resort CEO Andy Barber

Wellness Resort - Ransom

Golfer Ransom Finale

Spicy Neighbours Steve & Bucky

Sinful Guilt - Andy and Steve

Sorority Story

Unruly / Roaring Nightskies

Cuckolding - Ari / Andy

Corrupt stepdad Andy

Promiscuous invitation

Valentines stepdad

Champagne New Years - Ransom

Ice Hockey Jake

Pornstar Galore

Spinning Wheel of Death

Coffee & Shakes

Halloween - Ransom Sugar daddy

Santa’s sack

Cam girl - dildo review

12 days of Christmas

Endearing Sins spin off - Ransom & Lee

DPP story ransom and Ari

Pegging skinny Steve

Brazen and Buff

Blasphemy- Lloyd

Mechanic Frank

Request Andy - The One That Got Away

Loyalty of Life - Cult leader Andy

Ari vacation

Viking Freezy part 2

The hook-up

Dangerous Thirst

Escort Ari

Test of Faith - Endearing Sins spin-off / finished not posted

Ari - turned down date

Mister silver Fox

Skating rink

Viking Freezy part 3

Gardner game - Curtis

Dark Prince Ari

Magician Jake

Rafe/Ransom Dare Night

0900-TeleRidge

Panty sniffing Devin

Masquerade club

Favorite convict

Chateau inheritance

Blowing the dice

Barbarians

Travel diaries

Worked up - Andy

Skating rink - Jake

Tree chopping

Welder Steve

[harrelltut]

卍 JEHOVAH Occult Witness Me [ME = U.S. Michael Harrell = TUT = JAH] ONLINE as Biblically Black [Ancient] Egyptian [BAE = COSMIC] King TUTANKHAMŪN since I Metaphysically + Alkhemically REINCARNATED SOULFULLY [MARS] on Earth [ME = U.S. Michael Harrell = TUT = JAH] as I Mentally + Artistically + Creatively [iMAC] Write My HIGHLY Official… U.S. ATLANTEAN [USA] Egyptian Diary of SIRIUS Black [B] Afterlife Energy [BAE = COSMIC] SECRETS Under Secret [U.S.] Service [U.S.] PROTECTION in California [PC] 卍

[jasmariswonderland]

For Secrets Ask 📒📔💃🐇🌜 for Yuulan, Farron, Taima, and Danica. Sorry it's so long.

(A/N: Lowkey, long asks are my fav. I just need a little extra time to finish them. 😊)

OC Secrets Ask Here

📒- For a secret journal/diary they keep (Bonus: Share an entry from it!)

Yuulan's Diary Entry ~ November 30th

Saw Tsunotaro again this evening. He seemed in low spirits but when I asked him what was wrong, he wouldn't tell me but he did ask me something kinda odd. He asked me if I were to have a birthday party, would I invite him. I told him my birthday already passed but if I were to have a party, of course, I'd invite him. That seemed to make him happy and we went on our usual evening walk together. I guess there was something he wasn't invited to and that's why he's feeling down. I get it, it sucks feeling left out of things and I usually feel very left out around here since I can't use magic or fly on a broom. I don't know how much Tsunotaro knows about me or my situation, but I think I'm gonna keep that to myself for the time being, who knows what he'd think if he knew how useless I really am. But I do think I'll invite him for tea sometime soon, hopefully.

📔- For a secret sketchbook they keep (Bonus: Share a sketch or doodle within it!)

Yuulan doesn't really keep a sketchbook but she does doodle a lot in her notebook. Most of her doodles consist of drawings of Grim, random patterns and designs and Mickey.

💃- For a talent that they like to keep hidden from others

For reasons unknown to her, Yuulan has strong proficiency in languages. This is a holdover from her Scala training as one thing she was taught was various languages used in the different worlds outside her home. She's able to pick up on languages pretty easily and understand words only after hearing them a few times.

🐇- For a secret item they keep (stuffed animal, comfort object, etc)

Not sure how much of a "secret" it is, but Yuulan is very attached to the holiday card Malleus gave to her, ESPECIALLY after she realized the truth about his identity.

🌜- For a ‘weird’ habit or tic that no one knows about

Chewing on the tips of her braids when she's anxious or deep in thought. She's pretty good about not doing this in public but when she's back in her room, she does this a lot. Surprisingly, Grim has never seen her do this.

Everyone else's under the cut! ❤

📒- For a secret journal/diary they keep (Bonus: Share an entry from it!)

Farron’s Diary Entry ~ October 24th (His Freshman Year)

I think I just made a very big mistake. That mockup I made for Vil-san’s new stage outfit, he found it. I was foolish and left it on the dressform right in front of the closet in our club meeting room, thinking no one would stop by after we were done meeting for the day. Well, I expected him to be extremely critical of my work since it was, really, ametrauish at best. But to my surprise, he said it was adequate and, even more surprisingly, that I have a lot of potential! I’m supposed to have a chat with him tomorrow afternoon, no, this is bad bad BAD! I’ve done well so far not drawing attention to myself, what if Vil-san decides I should be a part of the Film Research Club as MORE than an assistant?! Oh Sevens, I don’t want to think about it! And I don’t want a repeat of middle school, I just want to sew in peace without worrying about judgement. Is that so much to ask?

📔- For a secret sketchbook they keep (Bonus: Share a sketch or doodle within it!)

Unlike Yuulan, Farron does keep a sketchbook, filled with designs of outfits he’d like to create in the future. He mostly draws his outfits modeled by either Vil or Sidonie.

💃- For a talent that they like to keep hidden from others

Singing, most of his friends know he plays piano very well but he can also sing too. (seriously, have you heard his voice claim sing?! Farron could have easily been part of the NRC tribe if he wanted to!) But his reserved nature keeps him from showing off this talent and plus he’d rather be known for his fashion design. Also, Pomefiore already has enough songbirds.

🐇- For a secret item they keep (stuffed animal, comfort object, etc)

Farron has a signed photo of Vil that Vil personally autographed for him at a fan event a few years before they started NRC. Farron is unsure if Vil actually remembers meeting him and lowkey, he kinda doesn’t want to ask since they’ve developed a very amiable, borderline queerplatonic relationship. But Farron did bring the photo with him to NRC and held onto it during orientation, as a goodluck charm since he really wanted to be sorted in Pomefiore. And it looks like the charm worked.

🌜- For a ‘weird’ habit or tic that no one knows about

Not really a “weird” habit per say, but each morning when Farron wakes up, he begins his morning by whispering affirmations to himself. He’s done this since beginning NRC in order to help with his confidence.

📒- For a secret journal/diary they keep (Bonus: Share an entry from it!)

Taima’s Diary Entry ~ November 5th

Well that sucked more than it had to. Classes A and D had joint P.E. again today which meant having to once again deal with the cabbage-head! Ugh! Why is he so…so…just thw way he is?! Ever since the spelldrive tournament, he has been pestering me about apologizing to him. For what, I have no idea since it’s his own damn fault Scarabia came in last! I really tried to ignore him but Ace decided to be a jackass and invite him to stretch with us. He knows we’re always at each others throats and I think it’s just entertainment for him. When he wasn’t berating me for my form, or being a human, he was openly comparing me to Malleus. Such an unfair comparison since, after all, I AM human and Malleus-sama is an all-powerful fae prince! Ugh why is he like this?! But I will admit, even if Sebek does get on my last nerve, he’s at least entertaining. And Epel let me in on a secret: Sebek is half-human himself! So I dare him to call me human again in an insulting way, I’ll have such a surprise waiting for him!

📔- For a secret sketchbook they keep (Bonus: Share a sketch or doodle within it!)

Taima doesn’t really keep a sketchbook but she does doodle a lot in her notebook, mostly chibis.

💃- For a talent that they like to keep hidden from others

Taima can play the harp a little, something she picked up from her mother. She’s pretty good with it but she’s also not much for playing intsruments and would rather leave that to Lilianne, preferring dancing.

🐇- For a secret item they keep (stuffed animal, comfort object, etc)

Now, absolutely NO ONE knows about this, but Taima has a little plush frog from her childhood that she still sleeps with. She keeps it hidden in a special drawer in her room and takes him out whenever she’s stressed or about to sleep. It was a toy one of her aunts gave her when she was a baby and she’s still attached to it. 

🌜- For a ‘weird’ habit or tic that no one knows about

Giving people secret names/nicknames. Kind of like how Rook and Floyd give people nicknames but Taima keeps all of her nicknames for people to hearself or in her phone’s contact list. 

📒- For a secret journal/diary they keep (Bonus: Share an entry from it!)

Danica’s Diary Entry ~ December 30th

Today was my last day in Sunset Savanna. All in all I had a fun time and it was nice seeing Lili again. But I saw someone else there too. Me, her and Taima were hanging out in the marketplace this afternoon and guess who we saw? Rook-san! We ran into Rook! He said he was home for the holiday too, idk for some reason I thought he was from Shaftlands like me and Vil. Either way, Taima and Lilianne convinced me I should hang out with him this evening so we did. We went to his family’s villa but we were the only ones there, we talked a lot. Somehow I felt less anxious being around him like this than when we’re at school. It’s easier thinking of him as just another guy and not my vice dorm leader. I did notice him staring at me a lot. He...really has such pretty eyes, and a very kind smile. He smiles a lot, but something about how he smiles at me is very…very…

📔- For a secret sketchbook they keep (Bonus: Share a sketch or doodle within it!)

Unfortunately, Danica doesn’t keep a sketchbook, according to her, she is artistically challenged and rarely draws.

💃- For a talent that they like to keep hidden from others

Danica wouldn’t really consider this a “talent” but she fancies herself something of an ameatur poet. She has a separate journal for writing her verses but considering she’s already very bashful about her known skills, she’d rather this hobby be kept to herself.

🐇- For a secret item they keep (stuffed animal, comfort object, etc)

Her music box, I’ve mentioned it once before but Danica has a music box that her sister gave to her on her 12th birthday, a few months before she died. She listens to it when she’s alone in her room and this is the song it plays.

🌜- For a ‘weird’ habit or tic that no one knows about

One weird habit Danica has is always arranging her items by color because according to her, that makes it easier for her to match things. Many of her accessories, jewelry and school supplies are set aside in separate containers based on their color.

[alfred-braginsky]

RusAme Secret Santa 2020

My secret santa this year is @grapeautumn​ !!! I hope you like it, Merry Belated Christmas! 

Gift requested:  Human AU Alfred accidentally summons a demon while making Christmas cookies. The problem comes when Alfred just vehemently doesn't believe in demons and just figures some random guy showed up at his house. The demon, Ivan, starts out fairly miffed but warms up to Alfred (Comedy/fluff, any rating)

Shit, shit , shit, shit!

Alfred simply cannot believe he forgot to make the Christmas cookies for the office potluck. Well, he could believe it. It was common knowledge that he was known to have one or two things slip from his mind. There was no way he could go out now at this point in the night. The roads were icy, and it was too snowy for anyone to see in this weather even with their brights on. All he had to make cookies was lingering ingredients in the cabinets. There wasn’t even a recipe he could follow, everything online looked like either too much work or too basic.

He couldn’t exactly serve up ‘banging your head against the wall’ at the party, so what could he do? A sense of clarity washed over him. He would call his friend Francis! After all, his pastries always seemed to kick ass at any event, formal or just your average potluck. Pulling out his phone he dials his number.

 No answer.

 Things seemed bleak. There was no hope. Nothing he could do. He didn’t have an inkling on the seemingly complicated mysteries to baking cookies. Another thought came to him in his time of need. There is no other choice. He was going to have to call Arthur.

Alfred shuddered at the thought of having to call his cousin for baking advice. The first reason being is that he would never hear the end of it from Arthur. He would have that smug smirk on his face as he brings it up every other Christmas with the family in that condescending tone Alfred hates so much.

The second reason being that any recipe he would get from him would probably end up as piles of ash. Arthur isn’t exactly known for his baking. Alfred hoped his improvisation skills would save him as long he had the building blocks for a cookie.

 Swallowing his pride didn’t seem so hard when he was this desperate. As the phone range he immediately regretted his decision. Too late to hang up now, Arthur would know he called.

 “Hm, hello?” the line stopped ringing as Arthur’s sleepy voice answered.

“…”  

Alfred hoped if he didn’t say anything maybe it will just be just be ignored and Alfred can go back to panicking in peace.

“Hello? Alfred? This better not be another prank call; I won’t fall for it twice! I’m hangin---”

“No! Wait…I’m sorry. This isn’t a prank, I swear.”

“What time is it there? Did something happen? Do I need come over there earlier than expected?”

“What? No! I need your help with something, and it doesn’t require you to come over.”

Arthur was silent for a moment out of curiosity.

“What do you want?” with cautious hesitation.

------

Alfred had explained everything. Arthur was as smug as expected. Luckily for Alfred, he didn’t need to write anything down. Arthur stored some of the books he likes to read  at his place for when he comes over for the holidays. An unpublished cookbook that Arthur had written himself was among the box of books.

Alfred went to the hallways closet and quickly located the box. Rifling through the book he was intrigued with a mix of disgust at how many cheesy romance novels were in the box. They all looked the same. His eyes widen as he spotted a book that looked different from all. The book was black and faded. It didn’t seem like Arthur’s style, but it was the only one that was different. Well, maybe if he looked more…

Nah!

There was no time for that. Alfred flipped through the book and was positive there had to be something in there. If it turned out to be Arthur’s diary, that was even better! Maybe he could find some dirt on him.

Speaking of dirt, it seems like that was the first ingredient for the cookies. Weird? But Alfred wasn’t going to question it.

He grabbed his coat and tried to get as much dirt as he could from the frozen ground. He collected all the dirt required in a bowl. Next step was flesh? Okay…this was going a bit off the track of cookies, but if this is what the recipe asked for who was he to question it?

He grabbed chicken nuggets from the freeze and heated them up in the microwave. Once heated up he put them in the dirt and began to mix the ingredients.

Alright, what did he need to do next? His eyes scanned the very old pages and his eyes widen at what the recipe asked for next.

“What the hell, cut a lock of my own hair?!” he exclaimed.

That had to be some kind of health code violation. Alfred is certain that the recipe will call for him to take it out later. The recipe required a few more ingredients that he was able to find nearby. After it was all mixed together, he rolled the nasty concoction out and began using Christmas cookie cutters to make them into holiday themed shapes. He sprinkled them with peppermint for a pop of color.

The final step was to leave them under the light of the full moon. Alfred looked out the window to see the entire moon above him. What luck! With a yawn he set them down with the window open for the full effect of the full moon’s rays. Baking took a lot of work and he deserved to rest. After taking a quick shower, he got into some comfy pajamas, and went to sleep.

The next morning, Alfred woke up to the sound of his alarm blaring in his ear. Letting out a groan he put his phone on snooze and shut his eyes hoping for a few more minutes of sleep. His eyes snapped open as he heard a loud crash coming from downstairs. He jumped out bed and immediately dug through his closet and pulled out a wooden baseball bat.

With caution he tipped toed out of his bedroom and around the corner where the banging and clashing was coming from. Swallowing hard, he gripped the bat tightly, ready to swing at whatever was in his kitchen. What made him think that leaving the window open at night was a good idea?!

Maybe it was a hungry raccoon. Maybe a party girl who went into the wrong house. Or maybe---

A tall man dressed in all black EATING HIS COOKIES!

“What the hell are you doing? Do you know how long it took me to make those!” Alfred shouted as he lowered the bat, his mouth dropping open in disbelief. His eyes held a pang of defeat. He was going to get scolded by his boss for not bringing anything to potluck again. His boss already didn’t like him. God, he was the fucking worst. At least bringing these cookies would have gotten him off his back today. Well, that is if this stranger hadn’t eaten them!

“Watch your tongue mortal.” A sweet yet threatening voice came from the intruder.

“What? Shut up! You’re the one who broke into my house and ate my Christmas cookies!” Alfred was so frustrated with this entire situation. The day started out so poorly he doesn’t know how it could possibly get any worse.

“You made me an offering. I was supposed to eat the offering.” The man had calmly explained. His previous demeanor shaken when the human who summoned him spoke to him in that way. No mortal has spoken to him like that, but he was unable to harm the entity who summoned him so there was nothing he could do about it.

“What offering? Dude, you literally broke into my house and ate the cookies that took me all night to make!”

“I am a demon from the 5th realm of Hell. I would not be in the house of someone like you if I was not called upon.” For the most part, people who summoned knew what they were doing. This man seemed clueless.

“A demon, huh? Where are your wings? Got any horns? You look like someone dug you out of the clearance section at Hot Topic.”

This references completely flew over Ivan’s head. This is taking into account that he could speak any mortal language, but he could not understand what it is the other man was going on about.

“I am in my most simple form to survive in this realm. You added unnecessary things to the offering, I could not come in my true form.”

“So ya can’t even prove it then?” Alfred crossed his arms over his chest and raised a brow.

There was a moment of silence. Ivan was trapped in this realm with no powers, and no one to call upon. He hung his head in defeat.

“No. I cannot.”

Alfred sighed. Well, there was nothing he could do at this point.

“Alright, you’re gonna come to the grocery store with me and replace the ones you ate. Wait there, I’m gonna get dressed.” Alfred held a calm tone as he noticed things becoming less hectic. He nodded before leaving the kitchen.

Quickly getting dressed and packing his work stuff into his side bag, Alfred comes back to see the man standing in the exact same spot. This man has not moved an inch.

“Are…you alright?” he asks hesitantly, looking at him up and down. His eyes landed on the strange man’s face. Their eyes locked. He had purple eyes. How strange.

Alfred’s face flushes red as he realizes he was staring at him.

“Yes, I am fine. I was told to wait. You on the other hand look feverish? You are quite red.” His tone did not waver.

“Y-Yeah! I’m fine. Let’s just get going, don’t think I forgot about you eating my cookies.”

“I have already explained myself, that was an offering!” The demon becoming increasingly frustrated with the other man. Ivan was at a complete loss as to how this man did not know he had summoned him.

Alfred rolled his eyes and exited his apartment with the other man in tow. They got to his car and Alfred proceeded to get in. The demon looked confused.

“What are you standing around for, get in!”

The man had a look of embarrassment.

“I do not know how.”

Alfred was inclined to believe him, although it was something so unbelievable. However, his tone seemed too meek to say otherwise. He gets out of the car and makes his way over to the other man as snow crunches under his boots.

“See this? It’s a handle you just pull.” His voice laced with patience as he explained the tricky technology that was a car door. He was a faster learner, on the second try he managed to open the door.

Both were seated in the car and Alfred began to drive away.

“By the way you never told me your name. I’m Alfred. Alfred F. Jones!” A bright smile adorned his face as the other had a tint of red on his cheeks. Probably from the cold.

“My name is I̶͖̠͋̿̐́v̸͈̥̗͇̂a̸̺̿́̆̈́͑n̸̞̐͑̑.”

Alfred could not understand the sounds the other man had just made. He blinks in confusion and clears his throat to hide his nerves.

“What?” asking for clarification.

“Ah, I am sorry. My accent is very thick. My name, to translate it into something you would understand, is Ivan.”

Alfred rolled the name around on his tongue. He offers him a kind smile.

“Cool!”

They arrive at the grocery store. The doors had just opened and it was full of elderly people and tired moms. Alfred hopes the lines aren’t too long, he really doesn’t want to be late, who knows what his boss will say.

“C’mon. We’re here for one thing.” Alfred motions Ivan to follow and he does. The grocery store was just like any other.

Full of food, noises, smells, bright lights. Ivan hates this place. The demon follows Alfred a little too closely. The shorter man can practically feel his body pressed against his own. Damn, he was so touch starved.

“Hey buddy, you think you can take a step back or two?” Stopping in his tracks to confront Ivan about the problem.

“I am here to serve you. I cannot do that if I am far.”

“Yeah, I’m not asking for 6 feet, just a few inches.” Alfred massaged his temples, so this was how the day was going to go, huh?

Ivan thought it over and took a step back.

“Very well then.”

“Thank you.”

The grocery store wasn’t as packed as he thought. Although, because it was only a few days before Christmas he wasn’t sure how likely it was that there were going to be any cute cookies left.

Rushing over to the baked goods sections his eyes zeroed in on the last box of Christmas cookies. A smile curled on his lips that fell just as quickly when he spotted an old woman reaching and then grabbing the box of cookies he so desired.

A look of sadness washed over Alfred; a defeated smile replaced his disappointed frown. Ivan watched as his bright energy seemed to vanish. Something inside of him told him that he needed to do something. They haven’t known each other for very long but the way Alfred has been treating him has been different than the other humans who have summoned him in the past.

The demon has some magic left on reserve for emergencies. Seeing the smile wiped off Alfred’s face was considered an emergency.

A dark aura enveloped Ivan and in an instant he appears in front of the now frightened older woman.

“You are not worthy of those cookies. Your mortal hands are unfit to hold possession of the power and responsibility they yield. Put them down and you shall not be harmed.” Ivan’s pitch was lower than Alfred has ever heard. The man just stared in shocked with his jaw dropped as the older woman practically threw them back on the table and went off speeding as fast as she could with her cart.

Ivan immediately went back to his human form. He picked up the mostly intact cookies and brought them to Alfred.

“For you.” He says, moving his hand up to Alfred’s face to shut his open mouth.

Alfred’s eyes were still wide.

“W-Why did you scare her like that? It was important but not that important she probably shit herself!”

“You are very crass. I did it for you.”

Alfred was upset but the action was very endearing. The way the black aura shrouded Ivan was pretty hot. Wait, why was thinking that? He needed to stop.

“Thank you. That was really nice of you. But you can’t scare old ladies like that! Maybe next time, ask her if she’s willing to give them up. You’ve probably traumatized her for life.”

“It does not seem like she had much time left.” Ivan said with complete seriousness. Alfred elbowed Ivan trying not to laugh.

“Alright! Let’s go pay for this bad boy.”

“Why must we pay? We fought for this, we won. We deserve to keep the spoils.”

“That’s not how it works, big guy.” Alfred claps the taller man on the shoulder as he leads them to the cash register.

“By the way. You gotta show me that magic trick you did earlier with the old lady.”

“Magic?”

“Yeah! Like did you have some smoke bombs? A voice changer?” Alfred’s eyes sparkle never taking his eyes off Ivan as he pays.

“I am a demon.”

“I see. A magician never reveals his secrets.” Alfred nods in understanding. “Artie’s the same way! He never thought we could see him practicing. But he wore this goofy cape everywhere.”

They talk as they make their way back to the car. Ivan opens the passenger door like a pro. The cookies seated safely on Ivan’s lap as they continue to talk.

“Artie?” he asks, the name tumbling clumsily on his lips.

“Yeah! My cousin Arthur. Yeah! He’s the one I got the book from that had the recipe of the cookies you ate.”

Ivan felt like he was talking to a brick wall. Alfred seemed nice enough, but he simply cannot believe that he is a demon and that Alfred summoned him. He needed to save his strength and peace of mind and just played along.

“Come with me to the office Christmas party? We get a plus one and since you’re already with me, and since we’re already on our way.”

“Yes.” There were too many things in Alfred’s sentence that flew over his head and it was just easier to accept them. He doesn’t know what he’s getting himself into.

They park by a plain building with grey brick, the parking lot covered in the fresh snow that was falling. Getting out of the car, Ivan vowed to protect these Christmas cookies with his life. He would ensure their safety until they arrived at their destination: The Break Room.

Alfred pressed a button, and they entered the elevator. He saw Ivan flinch and took his hand to calm him. Ivan’s shoulders dropped as he took a breath; he was grateful for the hand. The hand was soft and warm against his. The elevator bell dinged, and Alfred let go much to Ivan’s disappointment. Both of them stepped out and into Alfred’s workplace.

The shorter man greeted a few of his co-workers as he wore a friendly smile making his way over to the break room. His boss was there already, telling a story clearly no one wanted to hear.

“Look who made it on time for once, huh?” As he laughed. Ivan saw Alfred twitch and the demon narrowed his eyes at the small man. The party had plenty of treats and goodies. With more than enough cookies.

“Oh, I thought you asked me to get the cookies?” Alfred asked through gritted teeth.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I figured you wouldn’t so I asked Martina to bake some instead. Sorry, completely slipped my mind.” Alfred wanted to kill him. He has never wanted to murder someone so badly.

“I mean you’re not exactly the brightest, which is fine, we all have our strengths.”

Ivan has no clue what is happening, but he knows Alfred is not as stupid or forgetful as this man is making him seem. From what he has seen Alfred is kind, generous, and patient. Qualities he does not see from most mortals.

“Just let this be a lesson for ya, okay?” walking over to Alfred and putting a hand on his shoulder. Alfred was visibly uncomfortable. Ivan snapped. It didn’t matter if it used up the last of his power in getting home. The black aura returned along with blue flames. Horns protruded from his head as dark wings ripped through the back of his shirt. Wings that expanded the entire length of the break room.

“How dare you say such things when you are nothing but a miserable pile of waste. You are a pitiful excuse for a mortal. You are a worm beneath my feet and the feet of the one who summoned me.”

Ivan stomps over to the shaking manager and effortlessly picks the man up by the throat. The manager struggles in his grip. The employees gasp and watch with shocked expressions.

“You will show some respect and reverence to those who deserve it since you are only the dirt under my foot.” Ivan drops the man with a thud and the manager wriggles away and hides behind the other employees. Alfred stands tall as Ivan turns to him and reverts to his human form. Ivan lets out a heavy sigh as Alfred wraps his arms around the other man and kisses him. Ivan doesn’t know what this means but his human form seems to know instinctively to kiss back.

They break it and Ivan sweeps Alfred off his feet and picks him up bridal style. Alfred laughs and wraps his arms around his neck. Ivan goes to leave but Alfred stops him for a moment.

“Also. I quit. Merry Christmas, bitch!”

[choicesmcxjake]

Some Random Facts:

I have now played through every finished book, except VIP and the spanish one.

93 Books in total, 1450 chapters. (Subtracted the chapters from the ongoing books)

And 7 of those books I have payed for (almost) every diamond scene, plus a few random ones in other books.

Right now I have 2003 diamonds.

•

And these were my Love Interests in the books:

A Courtesan of Rome: No one

Across the Void: Mc: Kepler / Eos: Deimos & Oberon / Pax: Zaniah

American Most Eligible: Derek Taylor (dated) & Bianca Sandoval (married)

Baby Bump: Since we had to, I romanced both

Bachelorette Party: No One

Big Sky Country: Sawyer Oakley

Blades of Light and Shadow: Mal Volari

Bloodbound: Jax Matsuo

Crown and the Flame: Dom: Sei Rhuka / Kenna: Diavolos Nevrakis

Desire and Decorum: Miss Annabelle Parson

Distant Shores: Edward Mortemer

Endless Summer: Jake McKenzie

Foreign Affairs: Tatum Mendoza

Haunting of Braidwood Manor: Eleanor Waverley

Hero: Kenji Katsaros

High School Story: Michael Harrison

High School Story: Class Act: Skye Crandall

Home for the Holidays: Holly Wright

It Lives in the Woods: Ava Cunningham

It Lives beneath: Danni Asturias

Love Hacks: Leah Myers

Mother of the Year: Thomas Mendez

My First Two Loves: All Three (Headcanon Poly)

Nightbound: Cal Lowell

Open Heart: Bryce Lahela (1. Play) & Ethan Ramsey (2. Play)

Passport to Romance: Marisa Pires

Perfect Match: Hayden Young & Sloane Washington

Platinum: Avery Wilshere

Queen B: Professor Ian Kingsley (M!LI)

Red Carpet Diaries: Matt Rodriguez

Ride or Die: Logan

Rising Tides: Robin Tora (F!LI)

Rules of Engagement: European Guy (Noah)

Safe the Date: Lindsay Basu

Sunkissed: Eliana Flores

The Elementalist: Griffin Langley

The Freshman: Becca Davenport(1. Play) & Zig Ortega (2. Play)

The Heist Monace: Fabian Ahmad

The Royal Romance: Asian "Liam" (Sebastian)

The Royal Masquerade: Crown Shield (F!LI)

Veil of Secret: Flynn O'Malley

Wishful Thinking: Anna Koishi

•

My favorite books are still the Endless Summer Trilogy.

Other books I liked are Crown and the Flame Trilogy, Nightbound, Ride-or-Die and Open Hearts 2

A book that suprised me and I ended up liking was A Courtesan of Rome.

Random facts:

Suprisingly I didn't warm up to Blades of Light and Shadow, even though it very well made.

I miss the Art Style from ES and Hero

The Female Love Interests deserve better!

Open Hearts is kinda going downhill with Book 3, which is why I only really liked Book 2, but Book 1 was also okay. I'm still spending diamonds on Book 3 cause I have enough, I have 2 LI I like and I hope Pixelberry will catch themselves and give Raf, Jacky and Bryce the recognition they deserve!

•

My favorite LI is Jake McKenzie (suprise)

Close second are Bryce Lahela, Cal Lowell, Thomas Mendez and Tatum Mendoza

Others that I liked: Sei Rhuka, Diavolos Nevrakis, Michael Harrison, Ava Cunningham, Ethan Ramsey, Matt Rodriguez, European Guy (RoE)

Random fun facts:

In my Au Bryce and Ethan are dating Elliot and Valentin who are brothers, Elliot is the one working at Edenbrook, Valentin his younger brother.

I don't have a type, shut up...

I loved all of Endless Summers Love Interest but I can't bring myself to play and romance anyone but Jake (kinda funny, but he is my comfort character and he's also a big part of my Au(s))

•

My favorite Mcs is:

Endless Summer (Benjamin (Benny) Anderson)

Close seconds are: (yes I give all my character Jakes last name (in a few exceptions Anderson))

Elliot McKenzie (OH) • Sebastian McKenzie (FA)

[secret-diary-of-an-fa]

Doctor Who: Wild Blue Yonder Review

Quick question, Russel T. Davies: where the fuck did THIS come from? I only ask because this is a genuinely brilliant, exciting, well-written episode of Doctor Who that feels like the best of your original run, whereas- no offence- The Star Beast was a confused, underwhelming mess. Seriously, if I was a teacher who had to grade both pieces of work, I’d assume you’d gotten illegal help with one of them. I mean, seriously Russ: what did you do between writing Exhibit A (the mess) and Exhibit B (the fucking masterpiece)? Did you just neck a fuckload of hallucinogens? Did you finally get laid? Did you allow yourself to be beaten over the head with a big, rubber hammer? Whatever it was that made the difference, please, please keep doing it.

And now to address my actual readers: Wild Blue Yonder is very, very good and I recommend you watch it with a fucking colostomy bag in, because it is shit-yourself scary. The Doctor and Donna get stranded on a spaceship at the literal edge of the universe (she spilled some tea on the TARDIS console, because of course she fucking did) and there are things aboard from the darkness beyond that edge. Lacking shape or form or mass- being entities of pure, malignant consciousness in fact- they assume the forms of Donna and the Doctor and proceed, forthwith, to fuck with them in the most unsettling and horrific manner possible. It’s creepy as fuck to see the copied bodies of our leads distort and warp in horrendous, Kronenberg-ish ways as the entities from the dark beyond existence seek to elicit their fear, but the real-headfuck comes from their refusal to give up the pretence, remaining in-character even while waxing loquacious on their evil plans (which I won’t spoil). There’s an element of psychological warfare- even torture- at play here, as they gradually tease out bits of buried darkness and it’s deeply, deeply affecting. It’s strikes a delicate balance, being the kind of thing that you can get away with on prime-time TV without pulling its punches one fucking iota.

Of course, this being a Doctor Who episode, the horror is tempered with humour and quite a bit of silliness. There’s a line about how someone “Got a very old robot out of storage to walk, very slowly, down a very long corridor” that, in context is giggle-worthy (particularly with the additional knowledge that the Doctor has named the robot ‘Jimbo’) and a bit where the leads meet Isaac Newton and then discuss how hot was (with the Doctor being surprised to realise that recent experiences have turned him just a tiny bit gay).

The Doctor also gets to be the Doctor in this episode- running around, solving mysteries and finding ways to fight monsters. Not fucking victims of a ‘psychedelic sun’ or insect blokes who eventually turn out to be good guys: actual, no-holes-barred, proper Doctor Who monsters! I won’t spoil the solution he eventually hits on, but it’s bombastic and clever and entertaining in a way that literally nothing in The Star Beast was.

Oh, and no spoilers, but the final scene nearly made me cry. In a good way.

Obviously, I have gripes. Well, one gripe. Namely: Sir Isaac ‘Mr. Gravity’, Fuck You Newton was not a mixed-race individual and while colour-blind casting is fine (great, actually) for fictional characters, you can’t just race-swap actual people who actually lived and had identities of their own. The past isn’t just a big dustbin of fun characters and events to be pilfered for content: it’s a series of lives and experiences lived by real, sentient people who, if they had any say in the matter, would probably like to be accurately represented after their deaths. Even in an upbeat work of fiction, the past ought to be treated with a modicum of tact and delicacy; its tropes and ways of being preserved with all their flaws rather than suborned to suit modern audiences. Irreverence is fine: wild inaccuracy isn’t. I’d also like to point out that, if they wanted a non-white physicist in the episode, there are fucking loads of real ones who just aren’t taught in the Western scientific canon. This could have been a good time to introduce wider audiences to, say, Robert Bragg or Arthur B.C. Walker, Jr (who is the only reason we today can observe the sun’s corona accurately enough to get a sense of what it’s fucking doing, by the way). I mean, surely drawing attention to real non-white scientists is much more meaningful than pretending a dude with skin like fucking Savlon wasn’t Caucasian. It’s less attention-grabbing, of course, and it doesn’t virtue-signal as hard, but it’s more meaningfully progressive and actually serves to enlighten and inform viewers.

Okay, that’s out my system now. I would like to stress that I’ve only devoted so much time to that because it’s important to clarify where my objection comes from, lest some cretin completely miss the point and set up a chant of ‘bigot’ (probably misspelled as bigfoot because of the autocorrect on their cunting smartphone) right outside my blog. I often find that the people who object to these false representations publicly are just bigots because decent, progressive people are too bloody scared to point out the real flaws. It’s therefore important, as a progressive, anti-racist person, to raise objections that are actually sane, lest our entire cultural debate descend into a slap-fight between hateful, ill-read fascist micrococks and sanctimonious, reality-denying nutbars. All that being said, not-really-Isaac-Newton is only in Wild Blue Yonder for, like, three minutes, so in terms of the episode itself, it really is a teeny-tiny gripe and shouldn’t in any way ruin anyone’s enjoyment thereof. (EDIT: I actually considered deleting this whole bit, but that felt obscurely like cowardice, so I settled for a rewrite that shortened my original rant considerably).

A more immediately relevant discussion might be why Wild Blue Yonder worked where The Star Beast failed. And no, I don’t think it’s just that Our Russ got laid between script-writing sessions. Have you seen his face nowadays? He looks like a potato receiving an unexpected suppository. Nobody’s into that. No, I suspect the reason Wild Blue Yonder works is the tight focus and small scale. Essentially, its four characters- the protagonists plus two antagonists- on a spaceship, trying to out-think each other. There’s mystery, conflict and an interesting setting to provide context, and that’s all any story really needs. I often find that mistakes and poor writing creep into telly shows and films in proportion to the amount of superfluous shit they give themselves to juggle. I think there needs to be a term for that, so I’m going to coin one: ‘Concept Bloat’. The more extra characters and ideas and elements an individual episode of a TV show has, the more likely one of them is to go wrong, and when one thing goes wrong, a lot of other less-than-optimal stuff is allowed to slide by unchallenged because it looks fine next to the thing that actually went properly, fully wrong. The Star Beast is actually a perfect study of how this happens. The ‘Roth Warriors’ (I have no idea if I’m spelling that correctly, nor do I care) looked rubbish, but their rubbishness was less obvious than it should have been compared to the overall look of the episode’s fictitious London. Meanwhile, the plastic-y version of London probably seemed acceptable in the context of a plot where reversing a star-ship engine can magically heal streets. The magically-healing streets probably seemed fine because they were sharing plot-space with a wheelchair containing a hidden rocket-launcher (to clarify, I have no problem with a wheelchair that can shoot rockets- I just don’t think there’s any way you could make it look like a regular wheelchair). The sheer absurdity of this might well have gone unnoticed because, next to phrases like ‘Male Presenting Time Lord’, stupid tech probably seemed fine. And phrases like ‘Male Presenting Time Lord’ probably seemed acceptable when spoken two minutes after an encounter with a crappy-looking Roth Warrior, bringing us full circle. With a more streamlined set of ideas, it would have been easier to prune out the bad ones, or retool them until they worked. Each individual nugget of crap, however, allowed the crap on either side of it to pass unnoticed and what you ended up with was, well, The Star Beast. In contrast, Wild Blue Yonder is as tight as an XS rubber gimp suit and genuinely brilliant. It does more with less because there was time to hone and polish the less.

So what does this say about the future of the show? In my last review, I implied that the best thing that could happen to Who would be cancellation- a chance for the show to end on a satisfying note rather than change into something it was never designed to be. As much as I love Who, I’ve arrived at that the conclusion that quality alone isn’t the issue. Even if every episode of the next few series ends up being as good as Wild Blue Yonder, it still can’t go on indefinitely- not with any integrity. The best stories in the world are still only truly satisfying in the moment you close the book, having experienced the full, majestic sweep of the narrative and understood what it was saying creatively and philosophically. TV shows aren’t exactly the same, since they’re less singular efforts and don’t have a single story to tell, but even they eventually have to shit or get off the pot, which means actually ending at some point. So yes, I’m glad showrunner RTD has hit his stride with Wild Blue Yonder, but trying to bottle lightning is never going to work reliably and it doesn’t change the fact that, sooner or later, something is going to have to give. So yeah: I’m still at ‘Let Gatwa have his time and then call an end to it’. One good episode- one really fucking good episode- isn’t enough to fix the show’s underlying problem. I mean, it can be a hiatus rather than fullblown cancellation, but Who still needs some kind of break. Sorry.

[mama-tumblz]

Fa and G slso had a secret relationship that was discovered when G died and her diaries were found.

That’s something isn’t it? Who’s surprised though, really? 🤷‍♀️.

(Thanks to the epic librarian skills of @judikins929)

https://timesofoman.com/article/39351/thursday/hollywood-love-story-the-six-year-secret-of-ginger-and-fred

[doblondoro]

Fai un listone con un libro/canzone/film/qualcosa che ti piace per ogni lettera dell'alfabeto!

Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe, coming of age e self discovery molto dolce e delicata, sto aspettando il sequel

Battle Royale, uno dei tanti libri a tema "ne resterà uno solo", che come tanti distopici racconta fin troppo realisticamente la natura umana

Coraline, probabilmente l'ultima canzone in ordine cronologico che mi ha veramente devastata e fatto piangere sangue. La descrizione tagliente del dolore, della sconfitta, della resa.

Diaz, da vedere, assolutamente

Eskimo, il rimpianto, il ricordo, l'innocenza perduta, il si stava meglio quando si stava peggio elevato a poesia "se penso a quella che eri e a quel che ero che compassione che ho per me e per te"

Fucking Åmål, un film delizioso su due ragazzine che si innamorano

Gattaca, ebbene sì, mi piace la distopia

Hoppipolla, la canzone, il video, la voglia di saltellare tra le pozzanghere

I'll give you the sun, un libro che ho amato tantissimo, per la storia, il legame interrotto e ritrovato tra i fratelli e il loro linguaggio cifrato, le immagini fotografiche dell'ispirazione artistica, la love story non approfondita ma secondo me emozionantissima

Jingle bell rock, non mi veniva niente ma fa allegria dai

Kalinka, mi piace tanto e mi ricorda un viaggio in Russia dove una ragazza provò a insegnarcela

Lolita, non so se abbiano cancellato Nabokov ma uno dei libri più potenti e disturbanti che io abbia mai letto. Ricordo degli stralci in modo vividissimo, cosa abbastanza rara per me.

My mad fat diary, non smetterò mai di consigliarlo, di tifare per Rae, adorare Flinn, piangere per Tix (bonus Martino Rametta)

Notte prima degli esami. Mi emoziona sempre. "Forse cambiati certo un po' diversi" L'ascolto e ho ancora diciott'anni (bonus Niccolò Fares)

Orgoglio e pregiudizio. Libro e serie BBC del 1995. Che dire. L'ho letto veramente tante volte e mi mette sempre di buonumore. E Darcy non mi ha rovinato la vita.

Peanuts, ho la collezione di cinquant'anni di strisce e quegli eterni bimbetti e il saggio cane hanno tanto da dire

Qualcuno volò sul nido del cuculo che dire, magnifico

Radici, un libro meraviglioso

S questa non la scrivo, indovinate. Unico indizio, è una serie TV

The perks of being a wallflower, non ho letto il libro ma il film lo trovo un gioiellino

Un bacio, film di Ivan Cotroneo, intenso, coraggioso, e altri aggettivi che tengo per me per non spoilerare

Violino, non so suonare e sono un'ignorante che non è in grado di cogliere i particolari ma è uno strumento che amo follemente

Without you I'm nothing, una delle mie canzoni preferite di sempre

X factor perché ci ho passato tante belle serate

Yuuri on ice, l'ultimo anime che mi è piaciuto davvero davvero tanto

Zombie, Dolores mi manchi ancora

[weirdesplinder]

I romance che rileggo più spesso

Per prima cosa intendo chiarire che quelli che elenco in questo post non sono i miei romance preferiti in assoluto (alcuni sì, ma non tutti), ma bensì quelli che amo rileggere spesso. E per me, le caratteristiche che rendono un libro rileggibile a poca distanza di tempo dall’ultima volta che l’ho letto sono la leggerezza, brevità, e l’ironia che lo permeano.

Un amore inaspettato

TItolo originale: The famouse heroine

Mary Balogh

Link: https://amzn.to/2XTLoXn

L'aver salvato la vita al figlioletto di un duca cambia il destino della bella Cora Downes. La giovane viene infatti introdotta in quegli ambienti aristocratici di cui, come figlia di un semplice mercante, avrebbe solo potuto sognare. Il problema è che dove va lei i guai la seguono e anche se il suo altruismo e sprezzo del pericolo la rendono una beniamina del Ton, un passo falso e una risata di troppo la metteranno in una situazione compromettente con l’ultima persona al mondo a cui avrebbe voluto creare problemi.

La mia opinione: semplice, carino e divertente. Una lettura non impegnativa e veloce in grado di risollvarti la giornata se sei giù di corda, con un poco di romanticismo

Il segreto di Miranda

Titolo originale: The Secret Diaries of Miss Miranda Cheever

Julia Quinn

Link: https://amzn.to/3nYYygv

Londra, epoca vittoriana. Miranda Cheever si è innamorata del fratello maggiore della sua migliore amica a nove anni e non ha mai smesso di amarlo. Lui non l’ha mai notata, e un matrimonio sbagliato lo ha reso freddo e cinico. Eppure solo ora si accorge di lei

La mia opinione:  romanzo veramente dolcissimo e struggente, che con il suo amore non corrisposto mi spezza il cuore ogni volta  e poi lo ricostruisce con il lieto fine, fortunatamente. Quando rileggo questo libro di solito dopo rileggo anche il suo seguito intitolato Quella volta a Londra che vede protagonista la migliore amica di Miranda, e che è molto meno struggende, ma molto carino e ironico.

A Sir Philip con amore

Titolo originale: To Sir Philip with love

Julia Quinn

Link:https://amzn.to/3qyV8Cz

Trama: Eloise Bridgerton ha ormai ventotto anni compiuti ed è ancora senza marito. A spezzare il grigiore delle sue giornate arrivano le lettere di sir Phillip Crane, un botanico rimasto vedovo con due gemelli da crescere.

Dopo un anno di corrispondenza lui le chiede di sposarlo, ma quando finalmente si incontrano, Eloise scopre che Phillip, più che una compagna, cerca una madre per i suoi figli. Riuscirà il suo amore a fare breccia nel cuore apparentemente insensibile di Phillip?

La mia opinione: mi piace rileggere molti dei romanzi della serie Bridgerton, in particolare il secondo, il quarto, il settimo, ma probabilmente quello che rileggo più spesso è il quinto, questo. Eloise a volte come personaggio è troppo, lo ammetto, ma mi fa sempre ridere tanto.

Courting Miss Hattie

Pamela Morsi

Inedito in italiano

Link: https://amzn.to/2LDXku1

Trama: 1800. America. Hattie ha ormai più di trenta anni, e non ha mai avuto un corteggiatore. Non è bella ma ha della terra sua e finalmente uno spasimante si fa avanti. Non è bello, è vedovo e non è simpatico, ma è sempre meglio che rimanere zitella. Hattie accetta il corteggiamento e pensa proprio di sposarlo…..ma non sa che qualcuno è molto geloso delle sue attenzioni.

La mia opinione:  Un bellissimo libro. I due protagonisti, amici da anni, solo grazie ad un terzo incomodo scoprono di amarsi. Lei è bruttina, lui è bello e più giovane di lei, ma innamoratto cotto di lei. Tra scazzottate, raccolti, lavoro duro, equivoci e risate, il libro scorre via che è un piacere.Courting Miss Hettie Pamela Morsi

Titolo: The Brides of Praire gold

Maggie Osborne

Inedito in italiano

Trama: Cody Snow non sa cosa l’abbia spinto ad accettare l’incarico di guidare una carovana di dodici spose per corrispondenza dal Missouri fino a Clampet Falls, Oregon, ma già prima di partire si è pentito di averlo fatto. Non solo dovrà sorbirsi le loro innumerevoli lamentele e proteggerle dai pericoli del viaggio, ma dovrà anche combattere contro l’attrazione che prova verso una di loro, Perrin Waverly, poiché lei è promessa ad un altro, e lui ha giurato a se stesso dopo la morte della moglie, che non si sarebbe mai più sposato.

La mia opinione: Il mio libro preferito di questa autrice al momento. Non li ho ancora letti tutti, ma sarà sicuramente ai primi posti, poiché mi è piaciuto un sacco, nonostante sia piuttosto corale. Che dire. Mi è piaciuto talmente tanto che ora sto leggendo tutti i romance che riesco a trovare con protagoniste spose per corrispondenza. Nel vecchio west vista la mancanza di donne alla frontiera e nei nuovi territori appena colonizzati, era usanza che gli uomini mettessero annunci sui giornali cercando moglie, e le donne, spinte dalle più varie ragioni potevano rispondere all’annuncio via lettera. Ne conseguiva una corrispondenza che spesso si concludeva con l’uomo che pagava il viaggio alla donna che lo raggiungeva e i due, pur non essendosi mai visti, si sposavano.Ora, di solito, se una donna rispondeva ad un tale annuncio era perché aveva dei problemi a trovare marito in altro modo o non aveva altro modo di mantenersi.In questo libro le dodici donne della carovana hanno avuto diversi motivi per decidere di affrontare un viaggio così duro e pericoloso: Perrin è vedova, non può mantenersi da sola e non vuole rimanere nel suo paesino dove la sua reputazione è a pezzi a causa di un suo errore di giudizio dovuto però alle sue circostanze. Le pesa andare a sposarsi lontano, non per il viaggio, ma per il fatto che gli uomini l’hanno sempre sfruttata o delusa e non crede che la cosa sarà diversa stavolta. Mem invece è una donna troppo indipendente, troppo alta e schietta per trovare marito nel suo paesino, e ha sempre sognato di vivere un’avventura, desidera ardentemente questo viaggio, e le spiace un poco che sua sorella, che dipende un po’ troppo da lei, abbia deciso di seguirla perché è rimasta vedova da poco. Hilda è una maestra troppo brutta per trovare marito in altro modo e abbastanza piena di coraggio tedesco per tirarsi indietro davanti a questa sfida. Sarah, vedova di un ufficiale, ha viaggiato al suo fianco per il mondo e sa cosa aspettarsi da questo viaggio, troppo avanti con gli anni, ormai trentenne se vuole marito deve andarselo a trovare e non ha certo remore a farlo. Augusta dopo gli sbagliati investimenti del padre e il suo suicidio non possiede più nulla al mondo se non l'orgoglio di quella che una volta era la famiglia più ricca della città e odia l'idea di questo viaggio, ma non ha altra scelta. Jane, figlia di un pastore si unisca alla carovana per non viaggiare sola verso il suo promesso sposo che conosce già bene e che l'aspetta. Alice è in fuga sotto falso nome da un marito troppo manesco. Thea, una dotata disegnatrice, timida e riservata, spera in un nuovo inizio. Cora, una povera serva illetterata non ha altre prospettive. Winnie è assuefatta all'oppio e i genitori sperano che allontanarla dal paese potrà aiutarla, mentre Ona nasconde un segreto ancora più oscuro.Il viaggio viene descritto non con troppi tediosi particolari, ma con la giusta accuratezza. Le difficoltà grandi e piccole, i problemi su come e dove occuparsi dei propri bisogni, la polvere, la sporcizia, la stanchezza la malattia, eppure è tutto parte di uno sfondo pittoresco e verosimile a una storia romantica e avvincente. In particolare, oltre alla storia principale tra Perrin e Cody. Assistiamo al triangolo amoroso tra Webb, la guida indiana della carovana (che in realtà è solo per metà indiano ed è unico erede maschio di Lord Albany, Un ricco Duca inglese), Augusta bellissima, ma arrogante e razzista, e Mem, non bella, ma atletica, dolce coraggiosa e sopra ogni cosa amichevole, leale e curiosa. Webb all'inizio è attratto dall'incredibile bellezza di Augusta, ma quando lei lo respinge perché mezzo indiano, per fortuna si accorgerà di Mem…..Ora queste poche parole non vi rendono l'idea della loro storia che è davvero molto dolce ed è la parte del libro che ho amato di più, ma fidatevi se vi dico che vale veramente davvero la pena di leggere questo romanzo. Poiché oltre a tutto ciò che vi ho già detto contiene anche un mistero da risolvere……

The river knows

Amanda Quick

Inedito in italiano

Link: https://amzn.to/3iDzL0t

Trama: tre donne che si suicidano gettandosi nel fiume nella stessa settimana., non può trattarsi di una coincidenza, anche se sembra essere così.

Anthony Stalbridge , il promesso sposo di una della vittime però non crede alle coincidenze ed inizia ad indagare sull'accaduto, è convinto che qualcuno abbia ucciso la sua fidanzata e sospetta di una persona in particolare,Elwin Hastings, ciò che gli manca però è una prova. Così decide di introdursi nella sua casa per trovarla. Lì incontra un'atra persona che sta a sua volta perlustrando la camera da letto, una donna: Louisa Bryce, che cerca prove di altro tipo riguardanti i loschi traffici di Lord Hasting, per un articolo giornalistico.

I due uniscono le loro forse per indagare a fondo su Hastings, scoperchiando segreti molto più oscuri di quelli che cercavano e scoprendosi pericolosamente attratti l'uno dall'altra. Louisa ha molto da nascondere al suo nuovo collaboratore, eppure è proprio il suo passato che fornirà loro la chiave per risolvere il mistero. Infatti lei sa bene come un finto suicidio sia un ottimo metodo per scomparire, e dei tre corpi delle donne suicide, solo uno è stato ritrovato…..

La mia opinione: rileggo spesso i romanzi di Amanda Quick in generale, perchè io la doro, ma al momento uno dei mei èpreferiti è questo perchè presenta un impianto giallo molto ben fatto.

Titolo: Summer Breeze

Autore: Catherine Anderson

Inedito in italiano

Trama: 1889. Rachel Hollister non ha messo piede fuori di casa, un ranch in mezzo alle prateria, da ben 5 anni. Vive tra l'altro non nell'intera casa ma solo in una stanza e mezza e tiene barricato tutto il resto. Il terrore l'attanaglia al solo pensiero di uscire. Ma non è sempre stasta così, tutto ebbe inizio cinque anni prima quando tutti i suoi famigliari durante un pic nic furono uccisi a colpi di pistola da un misterioso omicida posto su un rilievo. Una ad uno caddero davanti ai suoi occhi ma la pallottola destinata a lei si limitò a sfiorarla e farla svenire. Il colpevole dovette crederla morta e Rachel sopravvisse, ma da allora non è più uscita di casa. Sopravvive grazie ad un anziano ranchero che lavorava con i suoi e che le porta cibo e vende i suoi dolci, tramite una fessura tra le assi che barrano le porte. Poi però un giorno lui non viene al loro solito appuntamente asettimanale. E’ stato ferito e al suo posto si presenta il giovane ranchero , un forestiero, che lo ha trovato e curato. Rachel dovrà superare le sue paure e fidarsi di lui se viole sopravvivere….. anche perchè chi ha ucciso la sua famiglia la tiene d'occhio e aspetta solo che lei esca per finire la partita.

La mia opinione: un romanzo interessante, diverso dal solito (l’agorafobia nei romance non è molto diffusa) ,romantico ma anche pieno d'azione e introspezione, molto intimo con i due nostri eroi chiusi in casa all'oscuro di chi voglia uccidere Rachel. Conntiene sia la tensione dei classici gialli in ambiente chiuso, e il romanticismo dei romanzi d'amore nonchè una delle più belle lettere d’amore che sia mai stata scritta. Provare per credere.

[eydika]

character aesthetics

tagged by @mihqorio thank u :)

tagging @saraparilla @moon-sugar @slithredn​

Rules: - bold any which apply to your oc; - remember to repost; - feel free to add to the list.

[ COLORS ] crimson. red. brown. orange. yellow. green. dark green. olive. khaki. shamrock. blue. dark blue. purple. lilac. pink. black. white. teal. mint. silver. gold. grey. metallic. matte. cream. ivory. beige.

[ ELEMENTS ] fire. ice. water. air. earth. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun. heat. cold. steam. fog. frost. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise. sunset. dewdrops. magic.

[ BODY ] claws. long fingers. fangs. teeth. wings. tails. lips. bare feet. freckles. bruises. canine. scars. scratches. wounds. burns. spikes. feathers. webs. eyes. hands. sweat. tears. feline. chubby. curvy. short. tall. normal height. muscular. lean. piercing. tattoos. lithe. moles. dimples. athletic. lanky.

[ WEAPONS ] fists. sword. dagger. spear. bow. arrow. hammer. shield. poison. guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knives. pepper sprays. tasers. machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. telepathy. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. pyre. teeth. rifles. words. wealth. knowledge. charm.

[ MATERIALS ] gold. silver. platinum. titanium. diamonds. pearls. rubies. sapphires. emeralds. amber. amethyst. metal. iron. rust. steel. glass. wood. porcelain. paper. wool. fur. lace. leather. silk. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. asphalt. brick. marble. dust. glitter. blood. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. shadow. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. grain.

[ NATURE ] grass. leaves. trees. bark. roses. daisies. tulips. lavender. wildflowers. flowers. petals. thorns. weeds. seeds. hay. sand. rocks. roots. ocean. river. meadow. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. rainforest. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space. clouds. mountains. poppies. galaxies. stardust. sky.

[ ANIMALS ] lions. wolves. eagles. owls. falcons. hawks. swans. snakes. turtles. ducks. bugs. spiders. crickets. birds of prey. singing birds. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. horses. cats. dogs. bunnies. praying mantises. crows. ravens. mice. rats. lizards. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. dragons. livestock. foxes. jackals. martens.

[ FOODS/DRINKS ] sugar. salt. bitter. candy. bubblegum. wine. champagne. hard liquor. beer. coffee. tea. spices. herbs. apple. orange. lemon. cherry. strawberry. watermelon. vegetables. fruits. meat. fish. pies. desserts. chocolate. ice-cream. cream. caramel. berries. nuts. cinnamon. burgers. burritos. pizza. french fries. ambrosia.

[ HOBBIES ] music. art. watercolors. gardening. house plants. smithing. sculpting. painting. sketching. fighting. writing. composing. cooking. sewing. training. dancing. acting. singing. martial arts. self-defense. boxing. electronics. technology. cameras. video cameras. video games. computer. phone. movies. theater. history. libraries. books. comic books. magazines. cds. records. vinyls. cassettes. piano. violin. guitar. electronic guitar. bass guitar. harmonica. harp. woodwinds. brass. bells. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. motorcycle riding. eating. flight. climbing. running. freerunning. exploring. yoga. meditation.

[ STYLE ] lingerie. heavy armor. medium armor. light armor. cape. dress. tunic. vest. shirt. sweater. boots. heels. leggings. trousers. jeans. skirt. jewelry. earrings. necklace. bracelet. ring. pendant. hat. flower crown. crown. circlet. helmet. scarf. brocade. cloaks. corsets. doublet. chest plate. gorget. bracers. belt. sash. coat. jacket. duster. trenchcoat. hood. gloves. socks. masks. cowls. braces. watches. glasses. sunglasses. visor. eye contacts. makeup. ties. uniform. fancy shoes. leather jacket.

[ MISC ] balloons. bubbles. cityscape. light. dark. candles. war. peace. money. power. clocks. photos. mirrors. pets. diary. fairy lights. madness. sanity. sadness. bittersweet. happiness. luck. optimism. pessimism. loneliness. secrets. lies. family. friends. assistants. co-workers. enemies. loyalty. smoking. drugs. kindness. love. kisses. hugs. revenge. lust. regrets. passion. spontaneity. potty mouth. recklessness. cautiousness. compassion. practicality. chivalry. tradition. patience.