#TW C-section

[theforlorne]

When you gave birth to a premature baby... (Lucifer x Reader)

🐑 ♡ While I did my research for this story, it might not be entirely accurate- ♡🐑

Part of a collection of imagines and scenarios for various Hazbin Hotel characters.

Mature, No Warnings, F/M, M/M, Other/M, Tag(s): Pregnancy, Childbirth, C-Section, Premature Birth, Child Harm, Hurt/Comfort, Hospitals, Parenting, Ambiguous Gender Reader, POV Second Person

Find it on ao3 ♡ WC: 952

This is a gift for the wonderful @jalicecookie who has been a gem of a friend and an inspiration to me too. Thank you, darling!

♡ Imagines and Headcanons Masterlist ♡

When you gave birth to a premature baby...

♡ Lucifer ensured that you received the best care throughout your experience. Even if he wasn’t allowed in the room with you in the weeks leading up to the birth of your child, you were always in his thoughts. Despite being offered to stay a spare hospital room, Lucifer turned down all formalities and the ‘royal treatment’ those around him tried to spare. Instead, he slept on a chair in the foyer of the maternity ward. He ate in the hospital cafeteria, and he kept himself as up to date with what was happening as he could. When he wasn’t sleeping, he spent his time buried in articles and books. Then he’d catch whatever nurse walked his way to educate him on how he could help. Yet every second - waking or not - he was terrified. It seeped into his dreams, and it choked him until he was forced to jolt forwards in his chair. He’d never forget when he was told about the emergency c-section. He’d never forget being by your side again after being apart for so long only to see the pain in your eyes. He’d never forget seeing your fragile child in the midwife’s arms.

♡ Time ceased to exist. Lucifer remained in the same, haunting moment for the full duration of your stay at the hospital. Holding you in his arms and being able to tell you how much he loved you was a routine he was all too familiar with. It was the only one that gave him comfort in the repetitveness of the hospital. The halls all looked the same, and his hands felt sore from washing. In one day, he counted a total of fifty stops to wash his hands, and everytime he scrubbed his skin raw to make sure not a single germ was left on them. He was compelled to listen to everything around him, and every new term seemed like another problem your child would face. Blood transfusions became a heartbreaking routine. Lucifer saw tubes attached to your child for the first few months of being alive, and it seemed cruel even if it saved their life. Hearing your child cry from the pain - not understanding why or what was happening - destroyed him. Every night he comforted you in your tears. And when you fell asleep, he allowed himself to cry. Some part of him believed he never left those halls.

♡ Lucifer struggled with the return home. Even when you were cleared to take your child home, there was nothing that could ease his worries. There weren’t guests. Sleep happened when it forced itself upon him, and he monitored your child at every possible second. Guilt and shame wracked him at not being able to do more. It didn’t matter what that ‘more’ was, he needed to be able to do it. That’s when it hit him, and he broke down in front of you. He asked you if you thought he was a bad father much to your surprise. Even if you reassured him, it didn’t help. He pictured his child hating him in ten years time when he’d never stopped smoothering them. What if he drove them away? What if they didn’t make it past the next few months? What if they didn’t make it through the night? So many thoughts raced through his head until they clouded his mind. They left him staring at the wall in your arms, and yet they didn’t relent. His thoughts told him that he needed to check on your child. Even if he couldn’t bring himself to breathe, he was compelled to stand - although he didn’t get very far as you pulled him back down.

♡ Lucifer was right about his fears, but he didn't let them control him. Sometimes he slipped up. Other times he would remember to tell himself that everything was okay. With you by his side, it was a lot easier, but that didn’t mean he stopped reflecting on his behaviour. On those days where he did slip up, he would make an effort to apologise after cooling down. Often he overdid it, and the grand displays would leave your child enamoured… This led to further reflection too, of course, after you voiced your concerns about giving your child the wrong idea. You didn’t understand what was right or what was wrong, but you fret that Lucifer’s apologies were too much at the time. An apology didn’t have to be a huge event, especially not when your child told you that Daddy was ‘silly’ when he was worried. The love between them both was obvious, and there was no need for bouquets and gifts everytime Lucifer expressed the slightest bit of protectiveness. Year by year, you watched as your child hit milestones. Then they would struggle with another, and you would put in extra work to ensure they were as supported as possible. Throughout it all, you were both there for your child. Lucifer simply liked to spoil them a little bit more than you.

♡ Lucifer couldn't have been happier to hear your laughter once those ten years passed. You were both sat in the bedroom after an improvised ‘fashion show'. The pair of you were roaring with laughter at the photos you took, and every outfit you had put on was harshly critiqued. Meanwhile, you complimented the colours of your child's outfits. He allowed himself a moment to watch the scene, soaking in the warmth you shared between one another. Then, when he was ready, he stepped into the room with broad, sweeping arms. He greeted you with a smile of his own, and brought you into an embrace. Love didn't even begin to explain what he felt for you both.

♡ Want to help me become a better writer? Why not start here ♡

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[newcombnotes]

Sometimes, writing ideas come to me in a dream like a prophet hearing from mad god. Usually, it's the plot of my dream. This time, it was someone reading a short story that kicked me in the gut enough to wake me up and make me write it down. It needs some polishing, which I will probably add to this later, but here's what I wrote down. (The dungeon referenced in the title is supposed to he like an RPG thing, not a prison.)

Giving Birth in a Dungeon

"We must go."

"What do you know about humans and our stamina?"

"That sometimes you can't just push through?"

"That's right. Sometimes, we just need to rest."

Later, they would come back and bury her. The baby wailing all the while.

"Is she cut very badly?"

"Yes."

[inevitablemoment]

My cousin's having her scheduled C-section tomorrow! I'm so excited!

[mourningsbane]

oh, god. did tanglefern try to do a sort of c-section on honeyspring when things went south? that slit on their belly looks a lot like a classical incision to me, and tanglefern's greatest mistake...this might be completely wrong so feel free to disregard!! obsessed with this blog right now, honeyspring what happened to you....

She was just so sick, and it was all so sudden. What else was there to be done? Nobody knows what struck Honeyspring ill so swiftly or with such brutal lethality, not even Tanglefern (but he is also a liar).

Desecration;

He wedged the cutter just under the skin, and pried the walls of her womb apart, glistening with watery wetness and slick with blood. Fluids sunk into the dirt flooring of the medicine den, reeking of disease, but Tanglefern pushed forward. He was not gentle, but he did not have to be. They knew that when she took that last heaving breath not even an hour ago, she was gone.

There was no patient to be gentle for, just a cooling corpse.

And so he ripped and tore until he could wrap his mouth around each little neck, a total of three. When he felt no more of the doomed litter, he stopped and took the time to finally glance at the little bodies sitting at his paws, sticky like honey.

He looked, and saw with rising despair, that they didn't look like kits at all. He could hear the rain pounding outside through the ringing in his ears, a thundering roar.

As he stared at those things that were not quite kits, those vague lumps of wet fur and teeth, Flaildrizzle wailed. Distantly, some raw part of him, carved open like the body before him, realizes it was all for nothing.

[cutefoxgirl2992]

I just thought about it but Moshang's kids would 100% be 99th percentile babies, 5'3 Shang Qinghua is NOT passing that shit naturally

[gojonanami]

thinking about an emergency c-section for one of your kids, and satoru is absolutely a wreck, already had been dozing off at the hospital after you were admitted for labor since “his” baby was taking their sweet time to come — as you put it. and he had taken up residence on the cot beside you, having just laid down, only to find a nurse doing a nightly check on you.

it happens slowly. the medical staff multiply one by one, until there’s a dozen of them, including one nurse on top of you with her hand keeping your baby’s umbilical cord from being wrapped around the baby.

and they don’t let him come in as they wheel you to the operating room, leaving him to pace alone, wondering if he would see your baby or you again. and realizing he didn’t even get a chance to tell you he loved you.

[sparklywaistcoat]

trixie: labor isn't progressing and baby's heart is slowing, if we don't do something now mom and baby will die

sister julienne: but whatever can we do the doctors aren't even here

trixie: fuck that noise i'mma do a c-section

sister julienne: you're gonna what now

trixie: did i fucking stutter

trixie: <performs c-section>

trixie: <saves mom and baby>

[jokerislandgirl32]

Vera’s Birth

Zach and Violet only had one child that was born in the month they were due, and that was Vera! She was due on December 31st, 2019, but arrived a couple weeks early on December 14th, 2019. Zach and Violet had delivered 2 daughters (Alexandria and Varina) by this point, but they’d never had a traditional or planned delivery. But this time the baby held out long enough for them to get hospital bags packed. So when Violet was rushed in for an emergency c-section they already had the bags ready…and the bags contained this:

Violet’s cousin Paige let her borrow one of her son Nathaniel’s water guns for the occasion. She’d told Violet this was a necessity. And after having a c-section and a baby that was more than a few pounds, Violet realized Paige was right. It hurt to move! So she needed this bit of extra help when she didn’t want to disturb the nurses. Plus…Violet enjoyed tormenting Zach immensely.

[swordsspells]

🐆🌅 [09.21.24]

[bluejay-flies]

A little later than I planned but finally, after months of work, it’s here. I hope you all enjoy and are just as excited as I am!!

[froggy-little-flips]

OH NO, I HOPE FIZZ AND AGG ARE OKAY!!!!!

In the operating room, the air is tense as the medical team works with precision. Fizz is sedated, lying still on the table, his belly visibly swollen from the cracked egg inside him. The lead surgeon, the doctor who spoke to them earlier, oversees the procedure with a calm but focused expression.

Doctor: *to the team* We need to be extremely careful. The egg is fragile, and any misstep could harm Fizzarolli or rupture the remaining shell completely. Let’s start with a gentle incision.

The team begins, carefully making an incision to access the egg. The room is quiet except for the rhythmic beeping of monitors and the soft hum of surgical equipment.

Doctor: *studying the egg once it’s exposed* There it is. The shell is severely cracked, but the contents look intact for now. We’ll need to extract it quickly but delicately to avoid any further damage.

Using specialized tools, the team works meticulously to lift the egg from Fizz’s body. A nurse carefully stabilizes Fizz’s vitals while the doctor focuses on the extraction.

Nurse: *checking the monitors* Patient’s vitals are steady, but his heart rate is elevated.

Doctor: *nodding* That’s expected. Keep monitoring him closely.

The egg, now partially exposed, glistens under the surgical lights. The crack is more severe than initially thought, with faint traces of fluid leaking from the damaged shell.

Doctor: *grimly* The crack is worse than we anticipated. We’ll need to stabilize it immediately once it’s out. Hand me the sealant.

A nurse passes a sealing compound to the doctor, who applies it carefully to the cracked areas of the shell as the team works to fully remove the egg.

Doctor: *with a deep breath* Alright. The egg is out. Start sealing the incision on Fizzarolli.

As the egg is removed and stabilized on a nearby table, the team quickly moves to close Fizz’s incision and ensure he’s stable. A specialist begins examining the egg to assess its viability.

Specialist: *after a moment of examination* The egg’s interior appears intact. The embryo is still alive, but we’ll need to place it in an incubator immediately to ensure its survival.

Doctor: *relieved but cautious* Good. Let’s get it into the incubator and monitor it closely.

With Fizz’s incision closed and his vitals stable, the medical team prepares to move him to recovery. The egg, now safely sealed and placed in a specialized incubator, is transported to a separate area for observation.

Doctor: *to the team* Excellent work. We’ll monitor both Fizzarolli and the egg around the clock. Let’s inform Asmodeus of the situation.

---

In the waiting room, Ozzie sits anxiously, his fingers tapping against his thigh as he stares at the door. The doctor steps in, removing his gloves and mask, and approaches him with a calm but serious expression.

Doctor: *gently* Asmodeus, the surgery went well. Fizzarolli is stable, and so is the egg.

Ozzie: *standing up quickly, his voice a mix of relief and worry* They’re both okay?

Doctor: *nodding* For now, yes. Fizzarolli is in recovery, and the egg is in an incubator. The crack was severe, but we’ve stabilized it. The next few days will be critical for both of them, but we’re optimistic.

Ozzie: *sighing deeply, his shoulders relaxing slightly* Thank you, doctor. Thank you for saving them.

Doctor: *placing a reassuring hand on Ozzie’s shoulder* They’re fighters. You can see Fizzarolli in recovery shortly. For now, let’s focus on ensuring both he and the egg continue to improve.

Ozzie nods, his heart still heavy with concern but filled with hope as he prepares to see Fizz and their fragile egg.

[adams-sinful-wings]

oh God. Please tell me Adam and the baby are going to be okay

The following contains a graphic birth scene.

Reader discretion is advised.

The moment Lucifer bursts through the doors of the hotel, the atmosphere shifts. The usual warm glow of the lobby feels cold, suffocating, as the urgency of the situation overtakes everything else.

“Move!” Lucifer’s voice booms, sharp and demanding as he carries Adam’s unconscious form through the hotel, his wings still half-flared. The others—Charlie, Vaggie, Husk—snap to attention instantly.

They don’t have a medical wing. They don’t have doctors. But they have something—a makeshift infirmary of sorts, barely stocked, but enough to try. Lucifer wastes no time, laying Adam onto a sturdy table in the center of the room.

Adam stirs, his breathing ragged, his face twisted in pain. His eyes barely crack open, dazed and unfocused.

"Wha—" He tries to move, but a sharp contraction rips through him, cutting off his words with a strangled cry. His entire body shudders. He’s slipping fast.

Vaggie runs to grab the emergency medical kit, and there are prefilled doses of morphine ready.

"Vaggie, pass the morphine," Lucifer orders, voice tense but controlled.

Vaggie hands it over.

Lucifer takes it with precision, jabbing it into Adam’s arm. The dose might not be enough, but it’s all they have.

Vaggie reached over and grabs the scalpel. "We’ll have to cut the baby out."

Lucifer barely has time to process before she moves to make the incision. "Vaggie, wait—let the morphine spread!"

"There’s no time," Vaggie snaps. "The baby is dying."

Adam suddenly gasps, his body arching off the table as another contraction seizes him, worse than before. His breath is ragged, frantic.

"Get her out—now!" Adam chokes, voice raw with desperation.

Vaggie doesn’t hesitate. She presses the scalpel to Adam’s skin.

As soon as the first cut is made, Adam starts to scream in pain, thrashing around and making Vaggie make a vital mistake on herself — she cut herself with the scalpel.

“GODDAMN IT ADAM! I’M NICKED!” Vaggie shouted as her blood was oozing out.

"Fuck!" Lucifer snarls, shoving her back just in time. "Charlie, get her out of here!"

Vaggie stumbles, hands still clenched around the scalpel, but Charlie is already pulling her away.

Adam writhes on the table, his breathing erratic, his body shaking. Husk grips his hand, trying to anchor him.

"Stay with us, Adam," Husk urges, voice rough but steady.

Adam barely hears him. His vision is fading. The pain is too much.

"She’s suffocating—!" His voice is barely a whisper now, panicked and weak.

Lucifer conjures another scalpel and turns to Husk, “You have to do it!”

“What?! I’m not a surgeon!”

“You have medical training! I know you do! I’ll hold Adam down while you cut!” Lucifer argued. “We gotta do this now!”

Husk takes the blade and goes to where Vaggie had been standing, fluids pouring out of Adam’s abdomen from the cut. “KEEP HIM STILL!”

Lucifer turns to Adam and goes around him until he is at Adam’s head. He holds down the bleeding man’s shoulders.

“Adam! Look at me!” Lucifer shouted.

Adam managed to open his eyes for a moment, his head moving a bit but it was perfect timing.

Lucifer leans in and presses his mouth against Adam’s.

Adam was bewildered but his body did lock up, not because of the kiss itself, but because Lucifer was focusing angelic blood down his throat. It seemed Lucifer had purposely bit his tongue and the golden blood was making its way into Adam��s body.

As Adam was just distracted enough, Husk reaches inside, carefully but urgently, and then—

The weight of a tiny, struggling body fills his hands.

The baby.

Husk barely breathes as he lifts them, covered in blood from butching Adam open.

Then, a tiny, sharp cry pierces the air.

Relief crashes over the room like a tidal wave.

Lucifer exhales, voice softer than anyone has ever heard it.

Husk is holding a bloody newborn baby, making small whines, as though the baby didn’t want to make noise.

Adam, barely conscious, forces his eyes open just enough to see. His breath shudders, weak but filled with something close to awe.

Husk turns to Adam and Lucifer, “It’s a girl.”

Lucifer smiled, “a girl?” He turned to Adam, a spark of joy in his eyes, “did you hear that? You have a da—“

Lucifer stopped talking when he said there was no light in Adam’s eyes and the movement completely stilled.

“Adam?” Lucifer began to shake him to wake him up. “Adam?” Lucifer’s grip tightened on Adam’s shoulders, giving him a rough shake.

"Adam, wake up." His voice is firm, demanding, but there’s an underlying edge of panic he can’t suppress.

Adam doesn’t respond.

His body is unnaturally still, the shallow rise and fall of his chest now completely absent. His skin, already pale from blood loss, takes on an eerie stillness. The spark in his eyes—gone.

"No—no, no, no." Lucifer shakes him harder now, his hands trembling. He leans in, pressing a hand against Adam’s throat, searching for a pulse. Nothing. His fingers move to Adam’s wrist. Still nothing.

Charlie claps her hands over her mouth, eyes welling with tears. Husk, still holding the newborn, stiffens, ears pinning back as dread fills the air. Even Vaggie, despite her own injury, stops struggling against Charlie’s hold, her expression unreadable.

"Lucifer—" Husk starts, but Lucifer isn’t listening.

His mind is racing, his chest tight with something awful and unfamiliar. He’s seen death more times than he can count. He’s caused death more times than he can count. But this? This is different.

"No." Lucifer snarls, his wings flaring as raw celestial energy crackles in the air around him. ‘Not like this.’

He forces his hands over Adam’s chest, pressing down hard. He’s never performed mortal resuscitation before, but he knows how a heart works, how breath moves through lungs. He starts compressions, ignoring the blood, the stillness, the faint warmth still lingering in Adam’s body.

"Come on, damn you. Breathe!"

Husk takes a step back, his grip tightening around the baby as he watches Lucifer work. No one dares to interrupt.

Lucifer tilts Adam’s head back, sealing his mouth over Adam’s, forcing breath into his lungs. Angelic blood still lingers on Adam’s lips, but it hasn’t been enough. Lucifer growls low in his throat, biting his own tongue again, letting fresh, golden blood drip between Adam’s parted lips.

"Take it. Take it, you stubborn, impossible man!" Lucifer presses his hands back over Adam’s chest, forcing more power into him, his fingers digging in as if sheer will alone could bring him back.

A long, horrible silence. Then—

He feels it…

Adam’s heart is beating in his chest weakly. He doesn’t move but Lucifer exhales sharply, relief hitting him like a punch to the gut.

"You absolute imbecile," he growls, pressing a shaking hand to Adam’s sweat-damp forehead. "Don’t ever scare me like that again."

Husk sighs and looks down at the baby in his arms, who was whimpering a bit.

Husk shifts the baby in his arms, her tiny whimpers barely audible over the tension still thick in the room. Her small hands twitch, fingers curling as if searching for something—someone.

Lucifer doesn’t move from Adam’s side, his hand still pressed against his forehead, as if making sure he was really there. Adam’s chest rose and fell, slow and steady, but he remained completely still. The only sign of life was the weak thump of his heart beneath Lucifer’s palm.

Charlie, still gripping Vaggie’s arm to keep her steady, swallows the lump in her throat. “Is… is he going to wake up?” Her voice is small, hesitant.

Lucifer’s jaw tightens. “He’s alive.” It’s the only answer he can give.

Husk exhales through his nose and shifts his grip on the baby again, grumbling. “Yeah, well, he ain’t gonna be much of a father like this.” He moves closer, hesitating for only a moment before carefully lowering the newborn into the crook of Adam’s arm. “Might as well let him hold her. Maybe it’ll get his dumb ass moving again.”

The baby whines as she’s placed against Adam’s unmoving form, but as soon as her tiny face nuzzles against his chest, she settles.

Lucifer watches closely.

Adam doesn’t wake. Doesn’t stir.

The morphine had spread through his system, keeping him still and mercifully free of pain, but there was something unnerving about his silence. His body had been pushed far past its limits—his heart had stopped. He shouldn’t be alive. The only reason he was still breathing was because Lucifer had forced him to.

The thought makes something twist in Lucifer’s chest, something uncomfortably close to anger. ‘Why did Adam let it come to this? Why had he been so hellbent on running, on avoiding help, even if it meant dying?’

“Hey Dad…” Charlie’s voice is gentle. “Maybe we should let him rest.”

Lucifer doesn’t respond at first. His fingers twitch against Adam’s forehead before he finally exhales and pulls his hand back. His wings shift behind him before folding in.

“Fine.” He stands, but his gaze lingers on Adam’s face. “But I’m not leaving.”

Husk snorts. “Yeah, no shit. You look like you’re about to chain yourself to his damn bedside.”

Lucifer gives him a sharp look but doesn’t argue. Instead, he steps back just enough to give Adam space, but his eyes never leave him.

Adam remained still, unaware of the silent vigil being kept over him.

The baby lets out a soft sigh, her tiny fingers gripping weakly at Adam’s chest hair.

Lucifer watches, expression unreadable.

Adam might not be awake yet—but he wasn’t gone.

And Lucifer would make damn sure he stayed that way.

[enoughslices]

You mention in one of your tags (related to the Emily episode) that you read an interview regarding Gillian's pregnancy and that some cast/crew comments were well-meaning but insensitive. Do you remember the interview or what they said?

The 90s were a fun time for music, tv, and entertainment, but it must have sucked for the women who had to deal with such a Macho and sexist Hollywood. Feeling compelled to go back to work shortly after a C-section out of "guilt" or fear for one's job "hurts" just to think of it because I know the pain of a C-section and just wanting to stay still when it feels like a stitch is going to tear.

:cracks knuckles: Let's goooooo! First of all, I can only imagine the pain and recovery from a C-section is super intense, full stop. 💜 I know from seeing friends go through it that it can be rough and traumatic even with access to deep rest and real support. It's absolutely horrific to me to try to imagine filming ten-days after an emergency C-section. I was able to find one of the main articles that gave me this impression, and it was this one from TV Guide, March 1995. I've excerpted some of it below and bolded some of the things that felt slightly infantalizing/not great to me. I should say before we dive all of the way in that I think part of what reading this article for the first time left me with was a sense of what an absolutely wild, overwhelming, and isolating time it must have been for Gillian, with some added 90s workplace misogyny and paternalism as icing on the cake.

It's worth going into this bearing in mind that Gililan was 25 at the time of this interview and 24 when she started the show and found out she was pregnant. She lied about her age to get the job - she said she was 27. Both her husband-at-that-time and David are 8 years older so they were ~32 when all of this was happening. Chris Carter would have been 37. She and her first husband, who was on the art direction team for the show, had a whirlwind 6-month romance then spontaneously eloped to Hawaii and accidentally conceived on their wedding day (which the full article goes RIGHT into 😅 but I'll skip ahead to the relevant bit):

A pregnancy would mean limitations on her work schedule and missing episodes - no one could predict how many - in the second season. "I knew I needed to make my decision about the pregnancy first, before broaching the subject with the producers," says Anderson. "I couldn't be wavering. Having this baby was the right decision for my husband and me. But it was like, 'Oh, my God. They did all this for me and now look what I'm doing to them.' So many things go through your mind. So yes, I was worried." Apparently with good reason. According to several sources, executive producer Chris Carter was not pleased. "He went ballistic," says one source. "He wanted to get rid of her." Two other insiders back up that claim. "They were considering recasting," confirms Anderson. "I heard a lot of stuff through the grapevine, and it was not comforting." Not so, says Carter. "I never, ever considered replacing her. It's a lie. If anything, I was the loudest voice saying: We have to protect this show and this person. Scully and Mulder are two characters that the audience has invested in, they are the secret to the success of the show, and we have to find a way to make this work." How did all of this affect Anderson? "She's grown up," says wardrobe supervisor Kieft. "Getting married and having the baby has matured her, I think, and given her a bit of stability. When she was pregnant, we did have a bed standing by, and whenever we could, we would get her to lie down. But she is quite a strong little person." In fact, Anderson missed only one episode and was back to work - after an emergency C-section - in just 10 days. "I was getting restless," says Anderson. "I wanted to get back to work because it was really hard on David, and it's the two of us up there, you know?"

So just to break this down:

Reading between the lines a bit, it sounds like she felt pretty certain that if she didn't share the news with her mind firmly made up and her feet planted, the producers might try to coerce her into having an abortion. Sit with that for a minute. (I am fully and passionately pro-choice but the operative word is choice.)

If three anonymous sources and Gillian herself all say Chris Carter was absolutely incensed about her being pregnant, he was for sure Big Mad and is just trying to cover his ass for PR. There's evidence for this elsewhere as well.

I really do think this last passage was truly well-intended but it hits a lot of points that leave me feeling uneasy. The idea that pregnancy has helped her grow up or ground her, this sense that people were making sure she rested when she was forced back to work immediately after a harrowing emergency c-section, and everything about the phrase "strong little person."... to me it just sort of betrays an environment where GA was habitually treated/perceived sort of like a little girl and not an adult woman with full agency.

Just. Ten. DAYS!!!!! It's a crime.

This next one isn't as bad by any means, but here's a quote from her hairdresser earlier in this same article:

"In the beginning," says Marsden, "she had trouble with her lines, and I think it kind of upset David because he is so accomplished. He's worked in feature files. He's worked with Brad Pitt. And he can learn his lines"-Marsden snaps his fingers-"like. But I know he appreciates how hard she works."

Now obviously, there's nothing overtly wrong with what he's saying here, and it's explicitly laid out in the article how David was the first person she told and that he was supportive. But this quote (and the article taken as a whole) provides a sense of overall atmosphere to me: she's young, she's green, everyone's already a little impatient toward her, and then she was also pregnant.

There's also this article from USA Today in 1994:

The C-section put her "out of commission at least an extra four days than they were planning." She figures everyone is "a little sorry" for sending her back to the grind so soon. "But it seems to have worked out. I think. So far," she says, breathless and bemused.

Does this mean they were originally planning for her to return to set SIX DAYS (???) after giving birth? (??????!)

In the same article, casting a bit of doubt on the earlier narrative that she was just "a strong little person" that they had to coax into lying back down:

Surprise: It calls for her return as skeptical FBI agent Dana Scully--albeit lying in a coma for most of the episode, which aired last week. "That did help a bit, but I mean, with 60 people around you and all the lights, it's not an unstressful situation."

Also in the USA Today article:

When she learned of her pregnancy in February, it defined the phrase mixed blessing. "It was wonderful news, but it scared a lot of people. It scared me. The show was doing relatively well, but it was still very young and there was the possibility of it going one way or another. It could have crashed, and I would have been somewhat in the middle of that. It was a rough time letting people know I had made this decision and deciding how to work with it, and for them, whether to recast (the role)."

I interpret that as something like: if the show had stopped doing well and there was anyway it could be pinned on her pregnancy/absence, it would have been chalked up as her fault. I feel like I'm forgetting something major in terms of crew saying condescending/sort of shitty things (am writing this at midnight because of who i am as a person, so if I remember I'll reblog with it tomorrow) but if you poke around the gilliananderson.ws archives from that time, a lot of the articles focus on or mention her pregnancy or being a new mom, and she speaks pretty candidly about having feared for her job and being absolutely exhausted and fully in survival mode. When you consider that all of this coincided with her being thrust directly into major fame, it's A LOT! This recent Bustle article (Feb 2024) on where Gillian Anderson was at 28 is also somewhat illuminating.

Thanks so much for the ask! I'll share more if I can remember where I saw it! 😅

[djsherriff-responses]

Bullfrog tracing his fingers on Dolph's c-section scar

The intimacy of your lover being the one to pull your baby out of your literal organs because you don’t want government funded doctors to steal your genetically enhanced medical impossible child and he’s the only one you trust with your child and life

[dr-cruces]

I find it very interesting how Judas and Jesus, in their darkest hour, are depicted giving birth during medieval times. The reactions to both are different, delivering evil and rebirth. I don’t suppose it could be a nice metaphor for the mistress and the madonna.

[neon-pink-witch]

TW: Vent post. Mentions of ptsd, ppd, past pregnancy, labor induction, c section, medical trauma

I will forever be angry on how absolutely no one tells people who gave birth that it's possible to get ptsd from

I will forever be fucking pissed at the risk factor screening that I took. It was the first and only time I was honest about my mental health to a doctor due to how important I knew it was.

No one ever followed up on it. I know for a fact I was at high risk for PPD and that was before being medically assaulted during my induction. Before a student fucked my epidural up.

And I absolutely hate that almost 8 years later I'm still up at what(for me) is 2am because my anxiety is so fucking bad.