#Truly wtf
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galahadenough · 4 months ago
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I still can’t get over the fact that lbh literally built a zoo enclosure for sqq, and then it was never brought up or addressed again??
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muzaktomyears · 8 months ago
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what the genuine fuck @ this cartoon from National Lampoon magazine's 1977 Beatles issue
basically Brian is an evil ex-Nazi who kidnaps the Beatles in Hamburg to turn them into his sex slaves via Dr. Frankenstein operations. (John and Paul are the sex slaves, George is just... there??, and Ringo is an unholy amalgam of bits of Stu and Pete.) They later escape but he wins them back by getting them a recording contract. In the last panel they're shown plotting to kill him.
putting it under a cut because yeah, antisemitism and homophobia
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quinnerisms · 3 days ago
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we as a fanbase won’t have to do anything about management bc at any moment quinn hughes is gonna kill them all in cold blood for us
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flythesail · 4 months ago
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Something about Del going back in time and seeing the moment her life with Colton began. Meanwhile, Colton in the future learns that soon his life will end
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I’m sorry but knowing how they sent Henry Cavill off in the last episode of season 3 has the same exact fucking vibe as this
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kansasjustgotgayer · 28 days ago
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I found my diary from high school
“I talked to (person) during lunch. Later i gave a tea bag to (other person). I wonder if this is a big deal to either of them.”
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girl,,,,, calm down
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alexbkrieger13 · 1 month ago
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Gotham have Ann not only doing press conferences but also actually acknowledging Jess's existence in front of the media? What is this magic they've done?
https://youtu.be/r_IrFvahj2w?si=PQ1Sol7vCO_4Ycv3
youtube
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sanjuwrites · 1 year ago
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why doesn't he just spit in my face and call me single like what the fresh fuck
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gaywifestyle · 2 years ago
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Trust AI, they say.
AI will help you, they say.
Well, tell me, then, what the FUCK is going on with my spellcheck.
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beehop · 5 months ago
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woke up and my bedroom light was on even though i definitely went to sleep with it off
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thenameisgul · 10 months ago
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someone let this man have gay sex with bisexual hunter from kansas; he’s losing his mind here
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bigturtl · 10 months ago
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(medic voice) prognosis? YOU'RE DEAD
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shouyuus · 6 months ago
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Hear me out on this🤚🏼 vi and reader arguing over something stupid and reader says something sideways that’s like Loki kinda freaky and vis like oh yeah mf and then boom freaky time but a bit of rough talk so vi can get reader to admit she’s right???
hahahahahahah /gunshots/ this grew legs and ran off on its own omfg; hope u enjoy!!! also credit where credit is due i immediately thought of this textpost when i saw this ask so. 18+, mdni dom/slightly mean!vi, college roommate!vi cinematic universe
"fuck you."
"no fuck you -- y'know what -- why don't you just edge me into next tuesday -- that'd be less painful --"
"i --" vi blinks, staring at you as you run your hands through your hair, still mumbling to yourself, apparently entirely unaware of the change your words have just wrought in her.
a spate of desire twists knife-sharp in her gut as vi imagines pressing you in half, a hand wrapped around your throat the other teasing between your legs, the way your hips might jump if she curled her fingers just so.
she wonders how quick she could get you begging; she wonders, a second later, how quick it'd get her on the edge when here she is, careening towards it at the mere thought of taking you apart.
"ugh -- whatever, i have to get back to my research paper -- i don't have time to --"
vi's arm shoots out and she's got her fingers wreathed around your wrist before she can stop herself. your alarmed look catches like a spark in the dry-grass tickle of her stomach and suddenly there's heat pluming up the back of her neck like smoke as she backs you into the apartment wall, licking her lips as she watches confusion and the hazy sheen of unmistakable want flicker to light behind your eyes.
"v-vi?"
she almost shivers. she thinks it's a testament to how well she's always treated you that you don't sound frightened -- only curious, and a little surprised.
"we're not done here, princess -- and i don't really think i like it when you try to walk away from me like that," she whispers, leaning in close enough to feel the way your breath stutters in your chest.
"vi -- i don't -- this isn't --"
but her questioning smirk as she pulls back silences the stumbling words on your lips as your cheeks go dark and your eyes cut away from hers.
"aww, c'mon princess --" and this time, she leans into the word like it might be an insult, doesn't miss the way your lashes flutter or the way your breathing's shallowed out to small little hitches, or the fact that you're stock still against the wall, even though her grip is light and there's nothing to stop you from pulling away.
"where's that fire from a second ago? weren't you just calling me a bad roommate for always forgetting to run the dishwasher before i leave?"
you swallow, the bob in your throat making her heart skitter up her ribcage like climbing up monkey bars.
"that... okay fine -- that was mean -- but it's not like i was lying about the --" your voice pitches as you look back up at her, and for a second, the hard light in your eyes catches again, only to sputter out as you meet her gaze for the second time, a guttering candle to a winter's breeze. vi bites back a grin. this is too easy.
"mm, but it still hurt my feelings, princess..." vi coos, leaning in to brush her lips by your cheek, reveling in the way you tremble beneath her, "and really, i don't think i'm that bad of a roommate, right? i take care of you, don't i?"
the moment her lips catch the lobe of your ear, you let out a soft whimper that makes vi's vision tilt sideways. and before she knows it, she's sucking a dark hickey into the skin of your neck and your fingers are fisting in her hair, making her groan.
she sinks her teeth into your skin, pulling back to pin you bodily to the wall, pressing a leg up between yours just to hear you keen.
"admit it -- don't i take good care of you?"
you whine through pursed lips, your eyes glazed out as you frown up at her, nodding faintly. she grins, feeling the heady, full-body rush of knowing she's got you right where she's been wanting you for weeks, for months.
"c'mon, say it --" she teases her free hand down the length of your body to flip up the hem of the large t-shirt you're wearing (it's one of hers; the thought catches her off-guard like punch to the side, the knowledge of it wringing through her with a bell-toll of desire) to skim along the hem of your cotton panties.
"y-you're -- you're not a bad roommate -- vi --" you twitch as she dips her fingers into the waistband of your panties and slicks a finger between your folds, hissing out at how wet you already are.
vi's grin is sour-candy-cyanide as she pulls back, her gaze half-lidded as she watches you chewing on your bottom lip.
"god, princess -- did that turn you on?" she asks, though both of you know the question is useless and purely rhetorical. she swallows down a thick moan as she inches a finger between your messy cunt lips to tease at your entrance. your answering huff only makes her chuckle, and this time, she does groan out when she finally eases her finger into you, feeling your hot, wet walls flutter around her, making her own cunt twinge with want.
"mm... i think i'd still like a formal apology -- tell you what," she says, putting on a false, considerate air even as she teases her finger in and out of you, nice and slow, almost thoughtlessly as she cocks her head, "admit that you were wrong and... we'll call it even, yeah?"
immediately, she sees you stiffen, feels you clench down around her as your eyes snap up. you've always hated admitting you were wrong, and even when you have apologized in the past, you've always danced around the words. and vi had thought it was just a cute little quirk of yours, chalked it up to your massive brain -- it must be so hard for someone so smart, so used to be in unequivocally correct all the time to admit, out loud, that they'd been mistaken.
a rush of heat crests into her chest at the thought, and she quirks her finger inside you to brush against the tender spot she knows will get your eyes rolling.
and it does, but not before you give your head a tiny, obdurate shake.
vi sighs, licking her lips as she brushes her thumb against your clit and watches, with a thrumming satisfaction, as your mouth falls open around a silent moan.
"just three little words, princess -- and then... i promise, i'll make you feel so good..." she croons the words into your ear, shudders at the thought of making you cum, of how good you'd look shaking over her fingers. "unless," she hums, "you really would like me to edge you into next tuesday, which --" she makes a noncommittal sound, "saturday afternoon and i've got early morning practice tomorrow, but i'm sure something can be arranged."
you let out another debauched moan as she bullies a second finger into your wet heat, still fucking them into you at that mind-bogglingly slow pace. you try to arch your hips, but her other hand slams you back against the wall.
she tuts, leaning back ever so slightly.
"uh-uh, i don't think so."
you scowl and try to shove at her shoulder, but there's no strength in the motion and the hand on your hip flashes up a second later to grab both your wrists, pinning them above your head in a single fluid move.
it happens so quickly you barely have time to gasp before she's leaning forward again, her words hot as she murmurs into your ear --
"go on, princess, try to fight back -- give me a reason to get rough with you."
at once, you still, but the you give both your wrists an experimental tug, only for vi to tighten her hold. you can't quite stop the moan that works its way out of your throat, nor can you control the way your pussy slickens impossibly around her fingers as she laughs, the sound caught somewhere between amused and mocking.
"gonna admit that you were wrong, princess?" she asks, crooking an eyebrow.
you press your lips and whine, looking away. her fingers pump a few more times inside you, her thumb finding your clit with truly disarming ease.
"vi -- f-fuck --!" you yelp as she flicks her thumb and your whole body jolts, electric tendrils of pleasure ricocheting through you, harsh as a loose bullet.
"there y'go... c'mon -- be a good girl and say it --" vi can't quite stop the way her voice frays around the edges as she leans in to ghost her lips over yours, her vision tunneling as she starts to fuck you with her fingers proper, working them into you in tandem with the rhythm of your hips, watching as you expression falls slack.
"mm -- nnngh -- please, vi -- i --"
"ah... that's pretty good but... still not an apology," she muses, slowing her pace again, dragging both her fingers along your inner walls, pressing them up, watching as your eyes squeeze shut, your entire body jerking as she massages your clit from both ends.
"i -- i'm s-sorry, 'm sorry, i -- i was wrong -- fuck -- oh -- shit, that feels -- v-vi --!"
"thereee you go... that wasn't so hard, was it?" vi soothes, picking up the pace, grinning as you keen, your knees nearly giving out, but she's got you held up by your wrists, her thigh still slotted between yours, her fingers plowing into you till you're almost writhing against her.
she lets out a long groan, low and thick, a panting gasp working out of her as she fucks you through your orgasm, watching with soft-eyed wonder as you whimper, your whole body twitching with the aftershocks.
"hey, hey, princess -- you still with me?" she asks, letting go of your wrists in favor of cupping your cheek, swiping a tender thumb along your skin. you lean into her touch, your head lolling ever so slightly as your lashes flutter and you fight to focus your eyes.
"y-yeah -- think so..."
vi laughs, slowly tugging her fingers from you, unable to keep a grin from twisting at the corner of her mouth as you shudder at the loss.
"jesus, princess..." she says, holding up her hand -- there's wetness slicking down the back of her hand all the way to her wrist. you blink at it for a second before a tiny, embarrassed scowl digs itself between your brows.
"i -- you --"
vi laughs, shaking out her hand and reaching for an errant napkin on the dining table to wipe down her fingers.
"no, no -- i'm not makin' fun -- it's actually kinda hot."
you purse your lips, cheeks stained damson as she watches you readjust your panties, tugging on the hem of her large t-shirt.
"still think i'm a bad roommate?" vi asks, biting back a smile, her heart caught somewhere in the back of her throat.
you look up, eyes bright, your head already shaking.
"no! i -- that was --" your head drops back down even as your shoulders shrug up, "i... i was just annoyed but i -- i didn't mean it --"
a beat, in which vi finishes cleaning off her hand and strides over to throw the wad of napkin in the trash.
"i... i'm sorry," you say, your voice small.
vi looks up to find you watching her from beneath your lashes.
"'s okay, princess. apology accepted." she smiles, and this time there's no poison hidden in it's corners, only the steady sweetness you've come to know her for.
"i -- uhm --" you clear your throat, still worrying at the hem of the shirt. vi cocks her head.
"i can make it up to you... if you want --" you say, barely meeting her eyes.
vi pauses, her eyebrows kicking up. a second later, she's grinning again, rolling back her shoulders and leaning into one of her hips.
"yeah? and... how'dyou propose you do that?"
you bite down on your bottom lip and jerk your head towards the open door of your bedroom, even as vi's stomach gives an unruly lurch at the clear implication.
she fights to keep her expression flat as she looks you over.
"damn, princess -- you really weren't kidding about that tuesday-thing, huh?"
you crinkle your nose, sniffing slightly, even as vi brushes by you, breezing into your bedroom and plopping herself onto your bed with a satisfied sigh. you follow her in a moment later, climbing on after her and giving her shoulder a tiny shove so that she's backed up against the apartment wall and you've got room to straddle her lap.
"well... i have been thinking about it for... for a while," you admit, your voice soft as you thumb at the collar of her shirt.
vi groans, her palms settling around your waist, fingers digging into the plush of your ass.
"yeah? oh fuck -- ah --" she jerks as you trail your hands down her front, pausing to tease her nipples over the material of her shirt.
"mhm..."
"what else have you been imagining in that big, beautiful brain of yours, hm?" vi asks, breath hitching as you tug the shirt from her and lean down to ghost your mouth over her hardening nipples, tongue flickering out to tease at the cold metal piercings.
"lotsa stuff," you say, almost casual as you wiggle down to settle yourself comfortably between her legs, glancing up at her with what can only be called a chesire-grin --
"w-wanna tell me about it?" vi asks, reaching up a hand to run her fingers through your hair. you hum, laving a tongue against her nipple before sucking the entire thing into your mouth.
a groan punches out of her as she shudders, her head tipping back with a dull thunk against the apartment wall.
"i could... but it'd be so much faster if i just... showed you, no?"
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rogueshadeaux · 1 year ago
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“I hate the script, the vault dwellers sound so cheesy—“ my Brother in Steel you realize that’s the point, right? They were bred to act like the physical embodiment of an HR e-mail. Did you not catch the memo that Vault-Tec put out regarding their experiment facilities?
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alexbkrieger13 · 1 year ago
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I'm sold on it being an akb clone. Shes in a gotham reel willingly?? (Also advertising their Olympic send off match - when do the dfb inform their players of their roster? 👀)
https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8sU9crh-TZ/?igsh=MTlrZzl2ZnpwOWtjdA==
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jinstronaut · 1 month ago
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a taehyung a week until he’s released ♥
week 52/52 ♡ (cr. namuspromised)
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