#Tub Protection
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wittness · 10 months ago
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family photo :]!!!!!! yippee! me and my so very wonderful kids who i will kill for. they mean so much to me GRAHHH ( so very positive ).
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nexus-nebulae · 8 months ago
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love watching weather science videos but like. why am i 1000x more interested in tornadoes over hurricanes. they're both spinning air
#we wanted to be a stormchaser when we were younger#nowadays we have to worry about our health too much to have such a risky high-stress high reaction time job#been watching nothing but tornado history videos for days it's one of our intermittent special interests#stemming from the weather science workbook we OBSESSED over as a kid#would read that thing cover to cover multiple times a week. i was the kind of autistic who would read the Encyclopedia for fun#i actually had a fave encyclopedia entry as a kid and now i cannot fucking remember it 😭#i also learned what sex was through the encyclopedia 😭😭😭😭 was legit my first exposure to the concept#but like even though we watch A TON of weather videos including tons of stuff about thunderstorms and blizzards#(thunderstorms my fucking beloved. favourite weather pattern ever. cumulonimbus my bestest friend <3)#most of the videos we watch are mostly tornado videos. and hurricane videos feel boring to us#even though hurricanes are wayyy more powerful#tornadoes are still fucking powerful it's just more. concentrated#tornadoes to me feel Targeted like. that's weather that says Fuck YOU in particular actually#especially multivortex tornadoes where you can literally have two houses both in the middle of the storm at once#and still only one of them gets destroyed#or like pictures you can see of demolished houses with their mailbox in the yard simply untouched#i like to watch tornado videos bc they help me. prepare. just in case#our state gets hit with tornadoes pretty frequently though not as much as tornado alley#and i like to know all the information for sheltering and what to do in the event of a collapsed building and such#i have a little survival kit in the bathroom just in case with like basic first aid and a radio and bottled water#bc thats probably the safest room for me to be in since it's not near any external walls and also hiding in the tub is usually good#also in the event you're caught on the road during a tornado#DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE shelter under a bridge or overpass#those work basically like straws where as the air gets pushed through it goes MUCH faster and gets dangerous way easier#as far as im aware the best place to be is in a ditch or hole if you absolutely cannot find a shelter in time#if you do not have a car with roll protection then being in your car will probably be worse#NOT AN EXPERT THO pls verify this information on your own if you think it is relevant or necessary i have poor memory and can be stupid#i just know that overpasses are dangerous as hell
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sarah-dipitous · 5 months ago
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Glanced outside while taking a bag for trash to the door to take out in the morning, saw a stray I didn’t recognize, and accidentally scared it away in my enthusiasm to see them 😔
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nsfwitchy2 · 5 months ago
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I will say, despite my exhaustion, i am very excited to try my new smock <3
It came yesterday and the zipper is bedazzled and i am HYPE to test it out
I wanted to test it yesterday but if I went in the kitchen and sprayed myself with the sink hose my parents would’ve killed me lmao
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artficlly · 2 months ago
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the art of pretending [one-shot]
marvel au bucky x agent!reader
being mentored by bucky is nothing short of torture; he’s cold, infuriating, and impossible to please. but when a mission gone wrong leaves you stranded in a freezing safehouse together, you start to wonder if all that supposed hatred has just been hiding something else entirely.
Warnings: 18+ content minors dni, smut, shower sex, unprotected sex, fingering, forced proximity, one bed, kissing, enemies to lovers-ish?, sexual tension, sparring, mentor bucky, bickering, insults, violence, bit of blood/gore/wound descriptions, bucky has issues, protective bucky, slut shaming (not from bucky), no use of y/n, lmk if i've missed anything
Word Count: 12.4k
A/N: hi! this is for some requests i received (one and two). i combined two of the requests because they were pretty similar, hope thats okay and i hope you enjoy! this took me... so long to write. i hope it doesn't flop <3 sorry for any typos - not proof read.
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You had two goals for the night: get shitfaced and get railed. So, catching your asshole boyfriend wrist-deep in some girl’s panties, doing the kind of finger work he never even bothered to learn for you, wasn’t part of your itinerary.
You could’ve cried, you could’ve begged, or collapsed into a sad cliché with a tub of ice cream and Sex and the City reruns. But no, you had a mission, and one mission alone. Get so unbelievably drunk on whatever you could get your hands on, so drunk in fact that you wanted to black out before midnight and preferably unconscious until sunset the next day.
Tony’s penthouse parties weren’t usually your scene. Too many sleazy rich men with superiority complexes, trophy wives sipping champagne through botoxed grins, and a carousel of extras that Stark always vehemently denied were hookers. What you did know was that, being an agent for S.H.I.E.L.D., your name was always on the list, and tonight, free top-shelf booze felt like divine intervention.
You just had to get in, get drunk, and avoid eye contact with your co-workers long enough to pull off a quiet mental breakdown and ignore the fact that you were rather underdressed for the type of party Stark was hosting. Scantily clad club clothing clashed hard with the pearls and Prada crowd.
A few raised brows and vague greetings followed you as you slithered through the gathering. 
But you held back a groan when you spotted the trio parked at the bar: Yelena, Steve, and Bucky. Great. The Greek god chorus of shame, in all their sculpted, judgmental glory. They looked just as uncomfortable as you felt, loitering by the bar instead of mingling with Stark’s circus.
You ignored their stares and made a beeline for the shelves behind the bartender—some poor kid who looked far too green for this gig. He gave you a look of dismay as you grabbed a bottle of tequila without asking. Slamming down a shot glass, you poured with shaky hands and knocked it back with the elegance of a car crash.
You barely registered the silence that followed until you glanced up and saw the stunned expressions staring back at you.
Yelena was the first to speak. “What happened to you? You never come to these things.”
You poured another shot. “Free drinks,” you muttered, then downed it, already lining up the next. No salt. No lime. Just pain, raw and unfiltered, sliding down your throat.
“I thought you were going out with your boyfriend?” She continued to press, while Steve looked rather scandalised as he watched you swallow back your third shot in a row with a shudder. 
Yelena reached over and snatched the bottle from your hand before you could pour again. “You should slow down.”
​​You blinked at her, teeth gritted, blood thrumming loud in your ears. She meant well. Of course she did. You’d always gotten along—ever since she’d been assigned as your mentor in your early days at S.H.I.E.L.D. You two had clicked effortlessly. It was all a part of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s long-term strategy to make field missions run smoother and reduce casualties. Avengers were paired with up-and-coming agents to pass down their experience and training, with the hope that one day, those hard-earned skills would save lives.
But everything changed when they reassigned you.
You’d been told it was to ‘broaden your skillset’, that it was about growth, adaptability, and learning from different leadership styles. What they didn’t say was that it would mean training under James Buchanan Barnes, aka Mr. No-Praise-All-Pain.
You’d tried. Really. At first, you gave it your all. Took his criticism, bit your tongue, pushed harder. But Bucky didn’t bend. He didn’t compliment. Didn’t guide. He just judged, cold and final, like every failure confirmed whatever low expectations he had of you.
Five months of that, and you were drowning. You begged for reassignment—back to Yelena, to Natasha, to anyone—but were denied every time. Some higher-up probably thought your mutual disdain was ‘motivating’, like locking two angry wolves in a cage and expecting them not to rip each other’s throats out.
And now here he was. Bucky Barnes. His suit jacket was slung carelessly over the back of his bar stool, his tie loosened just enough to reveal the sharp line of his collarbone. His dress shirt clung to his muscular frame, sleeves rolled to his elbows, exposing those unfairly defined forearms and the gleam of vibranium wrapped around a bottle of beer. His expression was stony, but familiar—stern brow, mouth set in a tight line, like he was already displeased with you and you hadn’t even said a word yet.
That look. That look you couldn’t stand.
Disappointment, or maybe pity. You couldn’t tell. Either way, it made your skin itch.
You wanted to punch him in his sullen, pouty face.
Instead, you laughed bitterly and reached for the bottle again, only for Yelena to hold it further away, firm.
“I said slow down,” she warned.
You made a face at Yelena. “Uh, you can’t talk. I saw you do shots out of a candle holder once.”
She didn’t even blink.
“Yes. And you called me messy. So I stopped.” She turned away just long enough to vanish the tequila bottle from sight like some sleight-of-hand magician. “This is me returning the favour. Stop it. You’re being messy.”
You barked out a harsh laugh and rubbed a hand down your face, smearing frustration across your cheeks. “You know what’s messy? My boyfriend. Well—ex-boyfriend.”
Across the bar, Bucky shook his head and muttered something low under his breath. You didn’t catch it, but you were sure it was vile because even Steve glanced over at him in disbelief, his eyebrows climbing high. Great. Judgment from Captain Morality and the Tin Soldier. Just what you needed.
Yelena sighed, already exhausted. “What did he do this time?”
You could tell she was reaching the end of her patience, and honestly, it was fair. She’d been your reluctant witness through the entire tragic saga of your love life. Two and a half years of emotional landmines and loser boyfriends who all somehow managed to be worse than the last. It was impressive, in a bleak kind of way.
You gestured vaguely, your expression somewhere between rage and disbelief. “I was supposed to meet him at some sleazy club downtown, his buddy was DJing—-fucking terrible DJ by the way. I’d barely walked in the door when I caught him in a back booth, fingering some girl who wasn’t even trying to be subtle about it!”
Yelena’s lips pursed. Steve stared like he’d never heard someone use the word ‘fingering’ out loud before.
“What did you do?” Yelena asked, her voice low, careful.
“Oh, the usual,” you said sweetly. “I punched him. Hard. He hit the floor like a sack of shit. Then I stepped on his hand until I felt something snap.”
Steve choked on his beer, coughing violently into his elbow. Bucky just watched you with the world's best poker face, a slight clench in his jaw muscles. 
You smiled at Steve, feral and unbothered. “Don’t worry, Cap. He won’t be playing DJ with anyone’s body parts anytime soon.”
Yelena gave a low whistle, somewhere between impressed and alarmed. “You actually broke his hand?”
“Felt like justice.” You shrugged. “Plus, he was always texting with that hand. Two birds, one stomp.”
“That’s assault,” Steve managed, his voice slightly strangled.
“Oh, please,” you said, rolling your eyes. “We’ve all done worse.”
Across the bar, Bucky finally spoke, his voice gravel-edged and unimpressed. “And now you’re here, drinking like a lunatic in front of half the team. Real graceful recovery.”
Your shoulders tensed, that familiar heat creeping up your spine.
“I’m not showing up for training tomorrow,” you said flatly. “Hell, I don’t plan on being conscious tomorrow.”
Bucky didn’t miss a beat. “It’s going on your report.”
Your mid-year report. Just another excuse for Bucky to publicly drag you, whining to the higher-ups about what a terrible mentee you were. How you needed to ‘apply yourself’, ‘show initiative’, or whatever corporate nonsense they lapped up. And of course, those same higher-ups were always looking for a reason to cut dead weight. One misstep, and you were done.
“Of course it is,” you snapped, spinning on your heel. “You miserable, ancient cunt.”
Steve choked on his beer again.
Without another word, you reached behind the overwhelmed bartender, who looked about five seconds from quitting, and grabbed the nearest bottle. You didn’t even look at the label. You stormed off with tequila already burning in your veins and spite lighting the way. 
You were leaning casually against the wall outside the gym’s changing rooms, dressed in workout gear that was probably a little more flattering than necessary. Tight enough to flatter your waist, breathable enough to pass as practical. Around you, the low hum of chatter buzzed from a small group of fellow agents. You were killing time before your dreaded one-on-one training session with Barnes.
Theo leaned a shoulder beside yours, towelling sweat from the back of his neck. He’d been an agent about as long as you had—charming, competent, and a little too easy to get along with. The two of you were part of that unofficial after-hours crew: drinks on Fridays, complaints about the job, stumbling home tipsy and hungover texts on Saturday mornings.
“You’re on sparring duty all week too?” Theo asked, glancing at you with mock pity. “I swear Rogers gets off on making me eat mat.”
“I know what you mean. Barnes definitely loves making me suffer,” you replied with a grimace. “That man has a personal vendetta against me.”
Theo grinned, tossing the towel over his shoulder, and he gave you a playful sidelong look. “When I get knocked on my ass, promise you’ll kiss it better?”
You arched a brow, but the smirk tugging at your lips betrayed your amusement. “Careful. I’m starting to think you’re flirting with me.”
“Starting to?” he shot back, unfazed. “Let me make it clearer. If I don’t get my ass handed to me by Rogers, I’ll buy you a drink Friday.”
You leaned back against the wall, arms folding over your chest. “And if Rogers wins?”
Theo leaned in, voice low and smooth as his fingers brushed a stray strand of hair behind your ear, lingering just a moment too long. “Then I’ll buy you two,” he murmured.
You opened your mouth to respond. Flattered, a little surprised, already mentally debating whether it was worth shaving your legs, when a voice cut through the hallway like a blade.
“Agent. You’re late.”
You didn’t have to look to know who it was. That gravel-edged tone, sharpened with disapproval, could only belong to one man.
Bucky stood at the end of the corridor, arms crossed, jaw set like granite. His black compression shirt clung to every sculpted line of his chest, joggers slung low on his hips in a way that really shouldn't have been legal. He looked like he’d just stepped out of a combat simulation and into a fitness magazine.
But the expression on his face? Full-on battlefield.
That signature scowl was locked in place, thunderclouds brewing behind his eyes as he stared straight past you, straight at Theo. Typical. You hadn’t even done anything, yet somehow, he already looked pissed.
“Training doesn’t start for another twenty minutes.” You reminded him.
He didn’t seem interested in whatever argument you were about to make, and he turned on his heel without another word.
You sighed, uncrossing your arms as you pushed off the wall and flashed Theo an apologetic smile. 
Jogging to catch up, your boots thudding against the hallway floor, you called after Bucky. “You know, there’s this really neat thing called a schedule. Maybe try sticking to it?”
He didn’t even glance over his shoulder. “You could use the extra time.”
You scoffed in disbelief at his audacity. Classic Barnes, gruelling, joyless, always ready with a critique and never a compliment. He’d made it his mission to grind you down, one scathing remark at a time. And yet, you knew you were one of the top agents. The higher-ups had told you as much in your mid-year review, even going so far as to say that your mentorship with Barnes was working brilliantly. You hadn’t bothered correcting them, though it irritated more than you liked to admit. All your hard work, and somehow, he got the credit.
Bucky didn’t stop until you were both inside one of the gym’s private sparring rooms. The door clicked shut behind you. No audience. No distractions. Just him and you and the electric tension that always seemed to spark the moment you were alone together.
“Seriously, Barnes, what’s your problem today?”
Bucky stepped onto the mat, gesturing for you to follow.
“You’re here to train, not flirt in the hallway.”
You barely resisted the urge to roll your eyes. Bucky always had a problem whenever your love life even breathed into the conversation. Said it was irrelevant. Unprofessional. A distraction.
Back when Yelena was your partner, the two of you used to spar and gossip at the same time, her dodging your punches while you gave dramatic play-by-plays of whatever your latest fling had done to you in bed the night before. She lived for it. Bucky? Not so much.
He’d cut the conversation short every time. Couldn’t even stand the sight of you laughing a little too long with someone else. He’d yank you away with some bullshit excuse like, ‘distractions on the field will get you killed’, or ‘do I need to report you for slacking off?’ Like you were breaking protocol instead of just being a human being.
You stepped into position across from him, tightening your stance, heat already prickling beneath your skin. From the glare he was giving you, he looked ready to fight. Good. So were you.
“Are you always such an asshole,” you said, voice flat, “or is that just a special little treat you save for me?”
He gave you a look, deadpan and infuriating. “Only when I’m working with someone who’s constantly late, distracted, or hungover.”
You let out a sharp breath through your nose and threw a lazy jab, just to shut him up. He deflected it with a flick of his wrist like he could’ve done it in his sleep.
“And yet,” you muttered, circling to your right, “you wrote me a glowing mid-year report.”
His hand faltered for a split second. It was brief, but you caught it, a crack in the armour he hid behind.
“So you read it,” he replied, already shifting back into motion.
“Hard not to. Maria practically quoted it word for word at me in the hallway.”
His mouth flattened. “It was accurate.”
You scoffed and came at him again, this time with more force, a blow aimed at his jaw. He blocked with ease, catching your wrist mid-air and twisting just enough to tip your balance. You staggered, caught yourself, then stepped back with a glare.
“‘Most adaptive mentee in the current program,’” you quoted, circling him again.
A jab. He blocked it.
“‘Performs under pressure.’”
You followed up with a low kick aimed at his calf. He side-stepped like you were moving in slow motion.
“‘Good instincts in the field.’”
Another punch, this one he met palm to palm, stopping your momentum cold. You grit your teeth and shoved him off.
“‘Promising.’” You swept your foot in a feint and then struck at his ribs. He pivoted out of reach, breath barely changed. “‘Capable.’”
He lunged this time, arm out, trying to lock your elbow, but you twisted under it, ducking away, the mat skimming under your feet.
“‘Excellent recall.’” 
You squared off again, eyes locked on his.
“Why the hell,” you asked, low and angry, “are you always such an asshole to my face when you’re singing my praises behind my back?”
He didn’t answer right away, moving like a shadow around you, eyes locked on yours. 
“As much as it pains me,” he finally spoke, tone flat, “you are my best mentee. Even if I dislike you personally, I felt your report should reflect that.”
You blinked, momentarily thrown. That was… probably the most praise you’d ever got from him—buried beneath the usual bullshit, sure, but praise nonetheless. On a good day, you might get a grunted ‘good’ if you were lucky. Most of the time, training with Bucky was just an endless list of everything you were doing wrong, punctuated by a jab to the ribs for emphasis.
“Do you always make your compliments sound like insults?”
“It wasn’t a compliment. Just the truth.”
You threw a kick toward his side, fast and impulsive. He caught your ankle and held it, grip firm around your calf for a second too long. His vibranium fingers were cold, even through the fabric of your leggings. You could’ve sworn they tightened around the muscle just a fraction as your eyes swept up to give him a look of disbelief. But instead of pulling away, you leaned into the moment and used the hold for balance. You pivoted hard on your grounded foot, letting the captured leg swing inward. Then you launched yourself forward, hooking your other leg around his waist, aiming to bring him down with you.
For a half-second, it worked. His balance shifted. Your hips were flush against him, legs locked tight around his torso as you twisted your weight, trying to drag him off his feet.
With a grunt, he straightened, twisted, and you suddenly found yourself airborne.
You hit the mat hard, slamming against it with a thud that knocked the breath out of you. The ceiling lights above blurred for a second as the impact rattled through your spine. His shadow hovered for a beat, chest rising with exertion, jaw clenched.
He didn’t smirk. Didn’t gloat. Just stared down at you, maybe it was the oncoming concussion you probably just suffered, but you could’ve sworn there was a flash of concern in his eyes.
“Next time, I won’t let it slide if you don’t turn up because you’re hungover.” He wiped a forearm across his brow.
“How do you know my heart wasn’t broken?” You asked, shaking off the blow as you rose to your feet once more, feet finding their usual stance.
He arched a brow, unimpressed.
“Don’t you have sympathy for me?” you asked, somewhere between a joke and a challenge.
“I wouldn’t call it sympathy,” he said coolly. “More like pity.”
That stung more than you cared to admit. You rolled your shoulders, stepping in again. Your guard was up, but there was a crack in it now, frustration flaring under your skin.
“I can’t imagine you were actually that sad about it.” Bucky bit out, not even bothering to hide his annoyance now. “Don’t you have a new fling every other week? Sure sounded like you were lining up another one in the hallway.”
“Oh wow,” you drawled, voice harsh. “Slut shaming? This isn’t the 1940s, Barnes.”
“It’s not my fault who you choose to date.”
You exhaled, long and low. The tension between you had teeth now, gnawing at the air. “Y’know, for someone who hates me, you sure pay a lot of attention.”
He didn’t respond. Just stood there, fists flexing at his sides, poker-faced.
You waited, ready to shoulder any insult he laid on you. You could see irritation simmering under his skin, jaw ticking, knuckles white.
“I think you should take a lap or two around the room.” He huffed finally. “Your blocks are late, your punches are soft, and your stance is a joke. Try warming up before you embarrass both of us.”
You grinned back at him, though it was closer to baring your teeth than a show of amusement. “But I’m still your best mentee, huh?”
“Let’s make it five laps then.”
You gave him a lazy salute and turned for the edge of the mat.
“Whatever you say, Sergeant.”
As you jogged the first lap, footsteps echoing lightly in the private room, you could feel his eyes on you, tracking every movement and watching you like a hawk, like a fuse lit, waiting.
And damn it, you ran a little faster because of it.
If you’d known how this mission was going to turn out, you would’ve called in sick. Faked a family emergency. Broken your own damn leg. Anything to avoid being stuck alone with Bucky Barnes in a freezing H.Y.D.R.A. bunker from hell. You’d even considered whispering a desperate prayer to whatever all-seeing god might be listening—or hell, maybe begging Stephen Strange to yank you into an alternate universe where this wasn’t your reality.
Gunfire rattled somewhere outside the cement walls, and you imagined your fellow agents in the middle of all the fun, chucking grenades, dodging bullets, living the dream. Meanwhile, you were practically glued at the hip with Sergeant Sunshine, babysitting an ancient Soviet-era computer that looked like it still ran on dial-up.
You were perched on the edge of a desk, legs swinging, having shoved aside a mountain of dusty files scribbled in Russian. All completely useless to you.
“What is it with H.Y.D.R.A. and brutalist architecture?” you muttered, eyeing the thick ceiling. “Why does concrete get them so hard?”
“I can’t concentrate with all your whining.”
You raised an eyebrow. “That’s literally the first thing I’ve said in ten minutes, Barnes.”
He didn’t respond. Didn’t even throw you one of his signature grunts. Just kept clicking away like the keyboard had wronged him personally, eyes narrowed at the screen as if trying to decode the goddamn Rosetta Stone.
You groaned and rolled your head back, staring up at the ceiling.
More concrete.
You weren’t usually this unbearable on missions, but this? This whole situation felt like a personal attack. You’d been mid-flirt with Theo on the quinjet (who had been very committed to making bedroom eyes at you) when they’d called out team assignments. The second you heard your name paired with Barnes, tasked with data extraction while everyone else got to blow things up, you’d spun around to glare at him.
He’d been sitting there in his usual cold, statue-like stillness beside Steve, as if this wasn’t a death sentence. You’d stormed over, demanded if he knew anything. He just shrugged and muttered something about ‘higher-ups’.
The walls shook suddenly—another explosion—and dust drifted from the ceiling. You blinked it out of your lashes and slid lazily off the desk, sauntering over to where Bucky hunched at the terminal.
“Can you hurry it up? At this rate, they’re going to bury us alive in here.”
“Give me a second,” he muttered through gritted teeth.
You leaned in slightly, eyeing the screen. A wall of Cyrillic met you, completely unreadable. You couldn’t help the exasperated sigh that left your lips.
“Remind me again why we’re the ones doing this? Wouldn’t it have made more sense to send someone who actually speaks Russian to help you? Or, I don’t know, someone who has the patience to teach you how to use a flash drive?”
He didn’t answer, just kept typing and clicking, as if the keys owed him money.
You crossed your arms, scowling. The only thing more miserable than being stuck in a concrete crypt was being stuck in one with him. When he was distracted, like now, he forgot to wear that usual look of thinly veiled disappointment. His brow furrowed in focus, lips twitching as he muttered to himself in low, clipped Russian. He looked—God help you—human. Not like the cold-hearted pain-in-your-ass who’d spent the last six months tearing you down. But like someone thoughtful. Careful. Quietly brilliant.
And stupidly, stupidly attractive.
You hated how your eyes lingered on the way his rolled-up sleeves hugged his forearms. The way the shadows danced over his cheekbones and the little groove between his brows. The way that little furrow deepened when something didn’t go his way, like he was trying to wrestle the entire world into submission with sheer concentration alone.
It would’ve been easier if he were just awful. Easier if you didn’t catch glimpses of something else beneath the gruffness. Something that made your chest tighten a little when you weren’t focusing. 
You swallowed hard, forcing your eyes to the screen. What was wrong with you?
The download bar finally appeared on the screen, crawling forward at a snail’s pace. You exhaled loudly, half in relief, half in impatience. 
“About time,” you muttered.
He shot you a look, cold and flat. “You wanna do it?”
You turned your back on him, pacing the room. Your nerves were coiled tight, the distant sounds of gunfire and explosions growing louder. The base was a pressure cooker and the damn download bar still hovered at 34%.
While you were busy taking your own turn brooding, the heavy metal door at the far end of the room slammed open with a deafening clang, nearly launching you out of your skin. Three armed H.Y.D.R.A. agents stormed in, rifles raised, eyes locked on target.
So much for the diversion. Clearly, it hadn’t been enough—or worse, H.Y.D.R.A. had seen through it. They must’ve realised it wasn’t a full-blown William-the-Conqueror-style invasion, just a cleverly dressed-up distraction.
“Company,” Bucky muttered, pulling his sidearm in one smooth motion.
You were already moving, instincts kicking in before your brain could catch up. You dove low, sliding across the slick concrete floor as a hail of bullets tore through the room. You grabbed the nearest overturned chair, dragging it into place just in time as metal pinged and sparked against it.
Bucky didn’t hesitate. A single, precise shot rang out, dropping the first H.Y.D.R.A. agent without a flinch. You didn’t stop to think. You surged forward, catching the second agent by surprise, your knee slamming into his gut with enough force to knock the air from his lungs. He doubled over, right into the crack of your gun butt across his temple. He crumpled, unconscious, before he hit the floor.
Then you saw the third.
Rifle up.
Aimed right at you.
“Get down!”
The shout was raw, sharp enough to slice through the chaos. You barely had time to turn your head before a body crashed into yours. His arm slammed into your torso, hurling you sideways just as the trigger was pulled.
The shot cracked like thunder.
Your back hit the ground hard, skidding across the floor. Pain flared along your shoulder, but it was nothing compared to the sound that followed, the harsh, guttural grunt that tore out of Bucky’s throat.
You twisted around.
He was down, gasping, clutching at his side and blood already soaking through the black fabric of his suit.
You scrambled back to him just as the final agent aimed again. Snarling, you fired three quick shots into the bastard’s chest before he collapsed in a heap.
The air went still for only a moment, then the ground trembled violently before you had a chance to assess the damage done to Bucky. Chunks of the ceiling cracked and began to rain down. Concrete groaned like a beast waking from a long sleep.
You turned to the computer, some unreadable symbols flashing across the screen, but you were quick enough to decipher that it meant the download was complete. Snatching the flash drive, you spun back to Bucky, who was trying to sit up, blood spilling between his fingers as he pressed them hard against the wound in his side.
“Get up,” you barked, crouching beside him. “We need to move, Barnes!”
The two of you had spent nearly two damn hours stumbling through the snow-blanketed mountainside, following the rough coordinates burned into your mind from the mission briefing. By the time the cabin finally came into view—half-buried in the snow, smoke long gone from the chimney—you were soaked to the bone and one more smart comment away from throttling him.
The escape had been messy, the H.Y.D.R.A base nearly becoming your tomb. You’d been forced to bolt through a collapsing back corridor, dragging the injured super soldier along with the last of your adrenaline. Between the debris, the gunfire, and the growing dark stain across his side, you weren’t sure how either of you had made it out. Worse still, you’d missed the quinjet extraction window by twenty minutes. The skies had turned black with storm clouds, wind howling across the range as ice and snow stung your cheeks. The base had finally picked up your call for aid on the mission-assigned satellite phone, but due to zero visibility and increased H.Y.D.R.A activity in the area, the replacement quinjet wouldn’t arrive until first light.
Which meant you were stuck together. In the cold. For the whole night.
The safehouse, at least, was still intact. A small timber cabin tucked between trees, barely standing but just enough. It had a lounge no bigger than a broom closet, a wood-burning stove long dead and cold, a bathroom you prayed had running water, and a single bedroom with a mattress that looked like it had seen better decades.
Your breath misted in the air as you slammed the door behind you, the wind nearly ripping the handle from your grip. Bucky collapsed onto the torn couch by the stove without a word, letting out a low groan that he probably thought you didn’t hear.
You should’ve made starting the fire your first priority. But one look at the blood soaking through Bucky’s side made that choice for you.
Now, kneeling between his legs with the remnants of the first-aid kit splayed out on the coffee table, whoever had been here last hadn’t restocked it properly. You glared up at Bucky as he shifted under your touch again. “Stop squirming.”
“I’m not.”
“You are,” you hissed, dabbing antiseptic across the wound with a gauze pad. “You keep flinching.”
“Because you’re digging in like you’re trying to punish me.”
“Oh, I haven’t even started,” you muttered.
He scoffed, muscles twitching beneath your hands as you pressed down. “Are you always this demanding?”
“Are you always this whiny?”
His glare was instant, eyes narrowed. “Is it your goal to piss everyone off?”
“I’m a fucking delight, and you know that.”
He gave you a deadpan look. “I think you’re mistaken. I definitely don’t like you.”
You lifted your brows, trying to keep your voice light despite the roiling mix of emotions spilling out. “You say that like you didn’t just take a bullet for me.”
You hadn’t even had the time to process it when it happened. The crash of his body slamming into yours, the sound of the gunshot, and the sickening thud of him hitting the ground. But now, with him sitting across from you, shirt dark with blood and a fresh gash still weeping crimson, the weight of it began to settle in.
He took a bullet for you.
You didn’t know what to do with that.
Part of you expected him to twist it somehow, to throw it back in your face as some kind of lesson that you were careless. That you’d left an opening. That he had to clean up your mess. You were already bracing for it, the sting of snide remarks spread over weeks like salt in a wound, little digs during training about how you ‘owe him one’ or how ‘distractions get people killed’.
And yet... he hadn’t said any of that.
Instead, he just shrugged, wincing slightly. “I heal faster because of the serum,” he muttered, voice gruff but quieter than usual. “I’ll be back on the field faster than you ever could.”
You stared at him.
At the stubborn line of his jaw, the tight press of his lips as he tried not to show how much pain he was in. The way his hand gripped his side was too tight. The blood beneath his fingernails.
Why had he done that?
You weren’t always the easiest to get along with. You’d spent months pushing each other’s buttons, arguing, fighting, constantly locked in a cold war of insults and bruises. So why? Why would he throw himself into a bullet’s path for you?
It was hard not to feel... something. Flattered, maybe. A little shocked. And, against your better judgment, grateful. You didn’t want to be grateful—not to him, of all people—but your stomach wrenched every time you replayed the moment in your head.
You didn’t ask him to do it. And yet, he did.
And now he was pretending it didn’t matter. Like he hadn’t made a split-second decision to put your life before his own. What if that bullet had hit a little higher? His heart? His throat? His skull?
“Sure,” you drawled, trying to cover for your sudden silence. “Great excuse.”
“It’s the truth.” He muttered. 
He didn’t look at you. Just kept his eyes on the floor and said nothing.
Which, somehow, said everything.
You stared at him for a moment longer, shaking your head as you tossed the bloodied gauze into the small bin beside the couch. The cold was starting to settle into your bones, your fingers stiff with it.
“Whatever. I’m going to try to find some firewood before we freeze to death.”
He glanced toward the boarded-up window, ice clinging to the edges. “You sure there’s any left out there?”
“Nope.” You pulled on your jacket. “But I’d rather get eaten by a bear than stay in here with you.”
You were halfway to the door before you paused, glancing over your shoulder.
“Can you get to that bed yourself, or do you need me to do that for you, too, super soldier?”
His answer came quickly, teeth clenched. “I’m fine.”
“Sure you are.”
You couldn’t deny the nausea in your stomach. Not from worry. Definitely not that. Just frustration. That’s all it was.
The wind nearly ripped the door from your hands as you stepped outside. Snow came in sideways, biting at your skin the second you crossed the threshold. You tugged your jacket tighter and trudged into the blizzard, squinting against the blur of white.
The woodshed was exactly where the briefing had said it’d be, about ten feet from the side of the cabin, half-hidden by trees. Or at least, had been. What you found instead was a crooked mess of collapsed timber and broken beams. Snow had settled deep into the heap, and every piece of wood you managed to drag free was soaked, the logs heavy with ice and rot.
You swore, breath clouding in the air.
You searched anyway, fingers numb, arms shaking. You tried the back of the cabin. Nothing. Even the branches scattered beneath the trees were too damp. No kindling, no dry bark, not even a damn pinecone. The cold was sinking deeper now, crawling down your spine and settling like an anchor in your chest. You didn’t want to push further into the wilderness, not in this weather and not with H.Y.D.R.A. agents crawling all over the mountainside. 
By the time you stumbled back inside and forced the door closed again, you could hardly feel your fingers or toes. Every limb ached like they were five seconds away from turning purple and black from frostbite. The cabin felt just as cold as the outside, but it was a momentary relief to be out of the wind that cut through your thick layers.
Bucky was on the bed, half-sitting up against the wall, the blanket pulled low across his hips. His eyes flicked up as you entered, taking in your dripping hair and shaking hands.
"Let me guess," he muttered. "No luck?"
You didn’t answer right away, just peeled your jacket off and dropped it near the door with a wet splat. “Everything’s soaked. The shed’s collapsed.”
He exhaled through his nose, chest deflating with the effort. “You’re freezing.”
You ignored him, stomping the snow off your boots. “I’ll live.”
“Not if you keep acting like a damn idiot.”
You turned to glare at him. “I’m sorry, which one of us got shot again?”
You crouched down, your knees protesting as you bent to untie your boots, but your fingers were too stiff, trembling from the cold. The laces had frozen slightly, the knots tight and uncooperative. You hissed through your teeth, fumbling and cursing under your breath as you tugged uselessly at them.
Bucky watched from the bed, arms crossed over his broad chest. He didn’t move to help, but you could feel his eyes on you. He tilted his head slightly and gave you a look that was half-concerned, half-exasperated, like you did this to yourself.
With a final frustrated yank, you freed your boot and kicked it off, followed quickly by the other. A damp string of muttered profanities trailed from your lips as you scrambled back to your feet, wet clothes clinging uncomfortably to your skin. 
“Which one of us,” Bucky spoke pointedly, breath fogging in the air between you, “went outside to play in a blizzard and came back looking like a drowned rat?”
You were shivering now, teeth on the verge of chattering, but you still squared your shoulders and stared him down, as defiant as ever. A bead of melted snow trailed down your temple. He stared right back.
“Get over here,” he said finally.
“Excuse me?”
“You need to warm up.” His tone was flat, too practical. “And the bed’s the only warm place in this shithole.”
“Oh, now you care about my well-being?”
He didn’t dignify that with a response. Just lifted the edge of the blanket.
You hesitated, eyeing the small mattress like it might bite you. "You’re the worst."
"And you’re still standing in wet clothes. Take them off and get in."
Your mouth dropped open. “Excuse me?”
“Not all of them,” he said, eyes rolling. “Just the top layer before you die of hypothermia. Stop being dramatic.”
With a theatrical sigh for good measure, you peeled off your wet sweater, leaving the thermal shirt beneath and then your pants. You did not check to see if he was watching you shivering in your underwear, cheeks flushed. You padded toward the bed like it was a walk to your own execution, hesitating again at the edge.
You tried—really tried—not to let your eyes linger on the broad plane of his chest, but it was impossible not to. His shirt was rumpled and half-untucked, the hem tugged up where he’d peeled it back to expose the bandage on his side. The white gauze was already marred with deep red, blooming in uneven patches that made you pause with something halfway between guilt and concern. Your gaze drifted to the sharp curve of his waist, the ridge of muscle visible beneath the bloodied wrappings. 
It was distracting. 
He was distracting.
But what you tried hardest not to think about was the bed. Specifically, how absurdly small the mattress looked with him sitting on it, shoulders nearly brushing both edges. There was no way you’d both fit. You’d be pressed against him. Shoulder to shoulder, chest to back, knee to thigh. 
You swallowed hard and told yourself not to think about it.
But you were already thinking about it.
“Don’t make it weird,” Bucky muttered.
“I’m not making it weird.”
He let out a low, tired huff, the kind that told you he was in pain but too stubborn to say it. You rolled your eyes in reply, more at yourself than him, and climbed in carefully, slipping beneath the blanket with a reluctant shiver. The bed was warmer than expected. Or rather, he was. Bucky radiated heat like a furnace, the kind that seeped into your skin and made your limbs relax before your mind could catch up. You hovered near the edge of the mattress, body stiff, spine straight like it might help you keep your distance. But it was a hopeless attempt. The bed was tiny—criminally small, really—and with him taking up so much space, there was nowhere to go but closer. One wrong move and you’d be on the floor.
“God, you’re warm,” you muttered into the pillow, trying not to sound too affected.
“Serum,” he replied shortly, his voice rough with exhaustion.
Slowly, inch by inch, you gave in. The chill in the air made it too easy to justify. You shifted toward him, the blanket tugging between you as your arm brushed against his. Then your hip. Then your thigh. Until, somehow, your bodies were nearly flush. 
He didn’t move. Didn’t pull away. Didn’t say a word.
And that somehow made it worse.
The silence settled between you, heavy and warm and intimate, like the air itself had thickened. You could hear his breathing, steady, but a little too deliberate. You could see his chest rise and fall from the corner of your eye. And worse, you could feel him. Every inch of him. The solid line of muscle at your side. The way your knees had somehow locked together under the blanket. How your forearm grazed his with every breath you took.
You needed a distraction. Desperately.
Reaching over to the nightstand, you snatched up the battered satellite phone, almost too quickly. The cold metal was jarring against your palm. For a moment, you considered activating the self-destruct protocol and blowing both of you up to end your shared misery. You flicked it on, the screen’s pale light casting long shadows across the room and across him.
Your eyes flicked over before you could stop them.
He was already staring at the ceiling, the faint furrow between his brows still present even in rest. His profile was defined in the low light, long lashes, strong nose, and the stubble on his jaw catching just a hint of light.
You forced yourself to look back at the tiny screen to check for any new updates.
Nothing. You were well and truly in for the night.
You scrolled to the mission briefing instead, flicking through the files to pass time, anything to distract you.
And then you saw it.
There, buried under the pre-mission notes, weather expectations, and extraction protocol, was a small addendum in the personnel request section.
Operation HARVEST: Agent Barnes, James B.Requested field partner: Agent 00149. Request approved.
You stared at it, the room suddenly quieter than it had been all night. 
That was your agent number.
He asked for you.
The same man who had spent the last six months grunting his way through every interaction, who seemed perpetually annoyed by your existence, who had made a point never to give you more than an ounce of credit, had explicitly asked to be paired with you.
You felt your throat tighten.
“You okay?” Bucky asked, as if he could sense your world shattering around you. His voice was low, eyes half-lidded with exhaustion 
You didn’t answer right away. You sat there, still curled under the heavy covers. The warmth of his body was helping, yes—but your blood was starting to simmer for a very different reason.
You turned slowly, holding the satellite phone up between your fingers.
“You want to tell me why it says on the briefing notes that you requested me as your partner for this mission?”
Bucky blinked once. His mouth parted slightly, but no sound came out.
“I asked you on the quinjet if you knew anything,” you went on, voice harsh now. “You told me it was a higher-up’s decision. You lied to my face.”
Bucky sighed through his nose, already bracing himself as he sat up straighter against the headboard. “I didn’t think it mattered.”
“Didn’t matter?” you scoffed, pushing yourself to your knees to face him, ignoring the goosebumps that rose as the blankets fell from your shoulders. “You picked me. You had me assigned to a mission with you, just the two of us, didn’t tell me, and then lied about it.”
“I didn’t lie—”
“You did lie.”
He dragged a hand down his face, slow and weary, but there was tension in the movement, an edge of frustration barely restrained. “I didn’t want you partnered with the other guys, alright?”
You faltered, unsure if you heard him right. “Excuse me?”
“It doesn’t matter—”
“No, you can’t just say that and not explain—”
“Fine!” He groaned, exasperated. His eyes dropped away from yours, fixing instead on a knot in the cabin’s dark wood wall. “I heard them talking. Theo and a few of the other agents.”
“What?” you asked, voice tight. “What were they saying about me?”
He didn’t answer. The silence stretched, heavy and awful.
“Just say it,” you bit out.
He looked at you then. Really looked at you. And it hit you square in the chest, something dark and protective burning behind his eyes. But it was reluctant, too, as if he hated that he was about to say it out loud.
His voice was low and rough when it came. “That you’re easy. That it’d be simple to get you into bed because you’re always asking for it. That you’re a slut. I gave them a piece of my mind and reported them, but I still don’t want you around them.”
You felt it like a punch to the gut.
Your breath caught, the sting behind your eyes immediate and hot. You blinked once. Twice. The words echoed, raw and ugly, and for a second, all you could do was try not to let them settle too deep. Not to let them stick.
You weren’t naïve. You knew you didn’t sleep around any more than anyone else your age. You knew that if the situation were flipped, if you were a man, no one would bat an eye. And still, the weight of it settled heavy in your gut, all twisted up with something darker. Dread. Shame. Fury. And under it all… that sick, crawling feeling that maybe Bucky had said something. Given them reason to think they could say it. That maybe he thought the same thing deep down.
That, maybe, to him, you were just some mess he had to clean up.
The words came fast, your voice shaking. “And what, you thought you’d ride in and defend me like some white knight? You know I could easily drop Theo, I could easily drop any of those assholes!” Bucky blinked, caught off guard, but you were already going, bitter heat rising in your throat like bile.
“You thought that would make it better?” you snapped. “You think that helps? They’re probably all laughing behind my back about how I can’t defend myself—”
“I wasn’t going to stand there and let them talk about you like that!”
“Why?” you demanded. “Because you didn’t want to hear it? Or because you’ve thought the same fucking thing?”
His eyes flared with disbelief, maybe even insult.
“I would never think of you that way,” he barked, and his voice cracked like thunder. “Let alone say it out loud. Because I’m not an asshole. Not like those guys you date.”
You laughed, blunt and hollow. “Why do you care who I date?”
He opened his mouth. Closed it. For a moment, you thought he wouldn’t come up with any words, but to your surprise, he exploded before you. “Maybe because you deserve better!” he shouted, the words ripping out of him before he could take them back.
The silence after that was suffocating.
You stared at him, heart hammering in your chest, a strange cocktail of feelings in your stomach that you didn’t care to identify. He sat there, breathing hard, his hands clenched at his sides like he didn’t trust himself to speak again.
“Jesus,” you muttered. You weren’t foolish enough to believe him, to fall victim to whatever joke he was trying to play. “Give me a break.”
“I’m serious,” he mumbled this time. 
You turned your face away. “Oh yeah? Like you could do any better? Don’t be ridiculous.”
His breath hitched, like you’d slapped him. You could feel him shift beside you under the covers.
“You really think that?” Bucky asked in disbelief.
You didn’t answer. Couldn’t. But Bucky didn’t let it stay quiet.
“You want to know the truth?” he asked, voice low and rough, as if the words had been caged for too long in his throat. “Fine.”
You turned back toward him, uncertain what expression you were even wearing anymore.
“I’ve liked you since the first damn time I saw you,” he said. “Group training. You were paired with some agent twice your size, and you still knocked him on his ass.”
Your heart slammed against your ribs.
“I thought you were… brilliant. And sharp. And confident. And yeah, beautiful too. You had this way of looking right through people—through me—and it scared the shit out of me. When they assigned me to mentor you, I panicked,” he said, with a dry, bitter laugh. “I thought if I pretended, if I was distant, if I acted cold, I could make it go away. Trick myself out of it.”
“But it just got worse,” he went on. “Every time I saw you smiling at some sleaze who didn’t deserve to breathe the same air as you, every time I had to watch you flirt with some smug asshole agents, I wanted to break something. Because it should’ve been me.”
You shook your head slowly, stunned. “Bucky…”
“I hated watching you get your heart broken over and over again,” he said. “Hated seeing you walk into training after pretending like nothing happened. You didn’t deserve that. Not when I knew I could treat you better if I just had the fucking guts to say something.”
Your ribs felt suddenly too small for your body, bones pressing into your lungs.
“And now we’re stuck on a mountainside,” he said, his voice softer, hoarser, “and I’m here bleeding in a bed with you, still lying to you, still trying to act like it doesn’t kill me every time you look at me like I’m just your mentor who you hate.”
You gaped in stunned silence, heartbeat pounding in your ears. Bucky watched you expectantly.
No. No, that couldn’t be what he meant. Not really.
“I don’t know what kind of cruel joke you’re playing on me,” you finally said, voice shaking, fingers knotted in the sheets. “I don’t get it. You’ve spent this whole time being…”
“I’m being serious,” he said, eyes locked on you. “I don’t expect you to believe me. I’ve fucked this up too many times. But I swear on my life, I’m not playing a game.”
You stared at him, blinking hard. “So what, this entire time you’ve been an asshole because you were what, pretending? Pretending that you didn’t like me, pretending that you weren’t jealous, when you could’ve just talked to me?”
His silence was immediate. Heavy. It told you everything you needed to know.
Your chest rose and fell too fast. Your mind was spinning, flipping through every memory like a film reel: his cold shoulder, his clipped instructions, the scowls when you joked with someone else, the way he always hovered a few steps too close in combat zones. The way he always caught you when you fell. There had been moments. Tiny fractures in his mask. The way his gaze lingered when he thought you weren’t paying attention. The time he bandaged your hand without a word, but so gently it had made your throat tighten. The night you caught him staring at you across the gym like he was in pain.
How had you missed it?
“I need to…” You whispered, slumping back under the sheets, pulling the blanket higher around yourself as if it might guard you from the ache in your ribs. “We should sleep. It’s late. Evac’s coming once the sun is up.”
He didn’t protest. He just nodded once, jaw tight.
Neither of you said another word.
Sleep didn’t come easily.
You hadn’t seen much of Bucky since you were both airlifted off the mountain.
He’d been recovering from his wound, officially. But it didn’t take a genius to figure out he was avoiding you. No texts. No nods in the hallway. No eye contact across the cafeteria. Just cold silence.
Coward.
You’d spent the past week half-waiting for him to come to his senses. The other half had been consumed wondering what the hell you’d do if he did. Because yes, you found him infuriating. Yes, he was emotionally constipated and moody and had the charm of a brick wall. But he was also gorgeous in that tortured-soul, sharp-jawed, arms-too-big-for-his-shirts kind of way. He cared about you, in his own twisted Bucky way. He’d taken a bullet for you. Defended you. Chose you.
And now he was just… gone.
You were leaning against the wall at the edge of the main gym, arms crossed, purposefully not looking at Theo and the other assholes you had suspected Bucky had been right about, when you heard footsteps and someone cleared their throat beside you.
Yelena stood beside you, her smirk suspiciously wider than usual.
You turned, brows knitting in apprehension. “Hey.”
“Congratulations,” 
“For what?” You replied hesitantly, watching as her brows lifted in delighted surprise. 
“You haven’t heard?” Her voice was alarmingly gleeful, like she was especially thrilled to be the bearer of whatever news she was about to lay upon you. “Barnes finally accepted your mentor transfer request.”
Your heart flatlined for a second. 
“What?”
Yelena, oblivious to your distress, continued to dig further. “I don’t know what you did to him up on that mountain, but… damn. I didn’t think he’d actually do it.”
“I didn’t ask for a mentor transfer,” you muttered, dread settling in your chest.
Yelena’s expression faltered. “Oh. Well, you have one now. You’re with Thor. They tried to pawn you off onto me, but you know, got my hands busy with the new group coming in—”
“Thor?!” You snapped, interrupting her spiel, “He’s a drunk! And he’s not even here half the time, too busy in Asgard—”
Yelena gave you a helpless shrug, and that’s when the doors to the gym opened and in walked the ghost of your week-long frustration.
Bucky was in full training gear, black sweatpants slung low on his hips, compression shirt clinging to him like a second skin. His hair was ruffled, pushed back half-heartedly like he couldn’t be bothered to fix it, a few strands falling into his eyes. The corded muscles of his arms were on full display, the glint of his vibranium arm catching the light with every step. He looked unfairly good, carved from grief and sleepless nights. But it was the way he wouldn’t look at you that struck harder than anything else. His jaw was tight, lips set in a permanent pout, that brooding scowl etched so deep it felt deliberate. He looked everywhere but at you, like you weren’t even there. 
Your blood boiled.
Without a word, you peeled yourself from the wall and marched toward him. He spotted you mid-stride, his posture tensing like he was preparing for impact.
“Hey—” he started.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” you snapped, voice low and venom-laced.
“Not here,” he muttered, eyes flicking toward the other agents filtering in behind you. A few of them had already glanced over curiously, settling in for whatever show was about to unfold.
“Too late,” you hissed. “You requested a mentor transfer for me without even telling me?”
“I thought it was what you wanted.” You both knew he was lying, and he refused to meet your eye. This wasn’t about what you wanted. It was about him feeling embarrassed after his outburst on the mountain. 
“Oh, really?” You stepped closer. “Because I don’t remember asking you to make my career decisions for me.”
“I was doing you a favour.”
“Yeah? Maybe try talking to me like a normal fucking person, and then I’ll tell you what I want.”
His eyes flickered up, stormy blues locking onto your face. “And what is it you want?”
You stared him down, tilting your head slightly, weighing the war going on inside you.
You.
I want you.
The thought was immediate, impulsive, and so painfully real it made your chest ache. But you shoved it down, crushed it before it could breathe. No. That was stupid. Why the hell would you want him—this man-child who’d ghosted you for a week, who’d spent the last six months acting like every word out of your mouth was a personal offence, who seemed to find joy in making you feel like nothing?
But then again… maybe you both had been trying so hard to deny the truth, burying something under six months of thinly veiled insults and sparring matches that got too rough. Maybe he was pushing you away because he didn’t trust himself to keep it professional. And maybe you were just as bad, biting back, rising to the bait, pretending you didn’t notice the way his eyes lingered or the way his voice softened when you were actually hurt.
You had to know if it was real.
The shuffle of movement and muffled chatter around you signalled the start of group training, slicing through your heated stand-off. Agents around you began to pair off, leaving you and Bucky still locked in place, face to face, breath mingling.
You lifted your chin. “Be my sparring partner?” you asked, voice loud enough for the others to hear, but eyes fixed solely on him.
He didn’t argue. Didn’t flinch. Just nodded once, tight-lipped, like he’d been waiting for the invitation all along.
You squared off on the mat, bouncing on your toes, adrenaline already coiling in your veins. Bucky moved like a soldier, controlled, fluid, annoyingly graceful.
“You don’t have to prove anything,” he muttered as you circled.
“I’m not,” you said, “Just testing a theory.”
He raised a brow. “What theory?”
You lunged, caught his arm, and twisted into a low grapple—just enough to draw him in.
His chest brushed yours. His breath hitched.
Then you kissed him.
Hard.
Your lips crashed against his mid-motion, stealing the next move right off his tongue. You felt him freeze, just for a heartbeat, before his hands twitched at your waist like he didn’t know whether to shove you away or pull you in. You felt the tension roll off him in waves. The way his body reacted was instinct. Shock. Hunger. 
His movements hesitated, and to your delight, despite the entire gym watching, he began to kiss you back. 
And that hesitation?
It was all you needed.
You shifted fast, breaking the kiss, then ducking low, hooking your leg behind his knee as you spun. In one fluid motion, you swept his legs out from under him and used the twist of your momentum to pull him down with you. He stumbled, off-balance, and you moved like lightning, hips snapping around his waist, thighs locking tight. You rotated with the drop, forcing him onto his back as you rolled with the momentum.
He hit the mat hard.
You were straddling him, thighs clamped around his ribs, palms flat on his chest. You smirked down at him, panting. 
Bucky stared up at you, winded, stunned, and very, very pinned. “That was dirty.”
You leaned down, your face just inches from his again. “So was your little mentor stunt. Call it even.”
Throughout the room, the entire gym was dead silent, staring. You gracefully dismounted him and marched off the mat, but Bucky scrambled up and followed you.
“Oh, now you want to talk?” you snapped as he caught up beside you.
“You can’t just kiss me and then walk away like that!”
“Why not?”
“You kissed me to mess with me.”
“I kissed you to see if you meant what you said on the mountain.”
The two of you burst through the gym doors and into the hallway. You didn’t look back. You didn’t have to. Bucky’s heavy footsteps were right behind you, his presence unmistakable, all coiled frustration and breathless anger.
A few agents stood frozen near the water station, others lingering by the mission board, all of them caught mid-conversation as they turned to witness the fallout. You were aware of the eyes on you, the awkward silence that followed, but you didn’t care. Let them stare. Let them gossip.
You stormed past them without pause as Bucky chased you like a dog on a leash that was just about to snap.
“You just kissed me in the middle of sparring,” he shouted after you, voice ragged and accusing. “In front of everyone. Is this a joke to you?” 
You didn’t stop. Didn’t slow. The elevator was too slow, too exposed. Instead, you veered to the stairwell and shoved the door open with enough force that it bounced off the wall. The clanging echo followed you as you started up, two steps at a time.
“Oh my god, would you just shut up already?” you snapped over your shoulder, breath catching as your hand slid along the metal railing, spiralling up the concrete stairwell. 
Behind you, Bucky cursed under his breath. “It was unfair.”
He reached for you and just missed your wrist. You yanked it away before he could try again, your skin buzzing with the ghost of contact.
“Isn’t that what you taught me to do? Use anything to my advantage?” you bit out, pushing through the next door as you reached your floor. The hall here was quieter and dimmer. You passed rows of familiar doors. Your apartment was at the end of the corridor, and every step toward it made your pulse throb louder in your ears. “What, you have a problem with me using my assets against you?
“Assets, huh? You know, you really are unbelievable—”
You let out an exasperated groan, cutting him back. “You kissed me back.”
That stopped him.
His boots scraped the floor as he slowed a few paces behind you, chest heaving, eyes wide with shock.
“What?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
You turned your key in the door. The metal clicked, and you pushed it open with a little more care this time.
“You kissed me back,” you repeated softly, almost to yourself this time and stepped inside. 
Bucky barged in after you.
“You don’t understand—I’m… I’m trying to protect you!” His voice followed you into the room, desperate. 
You kicked off your shoes without looking at him. “I don’t need protecting.”
“Would you just listen for once—” he snapped, shutting the door behind him. 
You rolled your eyes and started pulling off your shirt, tossing it onto your bed and turned to face him, arms crossed. “I am listening, you’re the one not listening to me.”
Bucky stood just inside the door, like he hadn’t decided whether to walk out or burn the whole damn building down. 
“I shouldn’t have told you that on the mountain, it was unprofessional of me.” His voice cracked as his words poured out faster than it seemed he could stop them, emotion thick in every syllable. “I requested the mentor switch because I don’t trust myself to keep pretending. I can’t control myself around you!”
You padded barefoot across the room to the small bathroom.
“How am I supposed to go on training you?” He muttered, gesturing vaguely in your direction. He was repeating himself now, rambling like a crazed man completely oblivious to your actions. “You pull that stunt in the middle of training, humiliate both of us in front of the others, and then act like it meant nothing? Jesus, I can’t even think straight when you—”
You peeled your leggings off and let it fall to the floor behind you.
“—and don’t even get me started on that assets comment! What the hell does that even mean? You can’t just go around weaponising your—”
You unclasped your bra and bent to turn on the shower. The hiss of water filled the room, steam already curling up the mirror.
“—I mean, are you even hearing yourself? You just, what? Decided to tackle and kiss me like it was some kind of training tactic?! That’s not even…Are you using my confession against me? God, you’re impossible, I swear—”
He looked up.
And stopped.
Mid-sentence. Mid-breath.
There you were, back turned, steam catching on the bare curve of your spine and trailing over the lines of your thighs, standing in nothing but your underwear.
His words died in his throat like a car slamming into a wall.
Mouth slightly open. Eyes locked. 
You glanced at him over your shoulder, saw the exact moment it hit him and raised a brow, feigning casual curiosity as you stepped toward the open shower door, letting the foggy heat billow around your legs.
“You joining me?” you asked sweetly. “Sure sounds like you need to cool off.”
He said nothing.
Just stared.
Like you’d just knocked the wind out of him for the second time that day. Just that haunted, hungry look in his eyes like he was trying to figure out if he’d died and gone to hell. Or heaven.
His mouth opened, like he had something to say, some half-assed rebuttal, some snarky comeback.
But no words came out.
Only a low, helpless breath.
“I wasn’t using it against you.” You clarified as you dragged your underwear down your legs, tossing them somewhere across the room. “I was seeing if you meant what you said.”
You stepped nto the shower, leaving him stood stunned in the bathroom doorway. A soft sigh slipped from your lips as warm water poured down your shoulders and back, washing away the dull ache in your muscles. For a moment, you simply stood there, facing the stream, eyes closed, the patter of droplets against your scalp soothing like white noise in a storm.
Then came the soft rattle of the shower door behind you. You didn’t need to open your eyes to know it was him.
The subtle swish of movement was followed by the cool press of metal against your waist, his vibranium arm snaking around you, cool against the heat of the water and your flushed skin. Goosebumps prickled instantly across your stomach, nipples peaking at the contrast.
You turned slowly, steam swirling around you in thick waves as you met Bucky’s eyes. His wet hair was slicked against his neck, droplets clinging to the dark strands and sliding down his jawline. Beads of water traced the line of his throat and the rise of his Adam’s apple, disappearing over the muscle of his chest. His hands found your hips, warm and solid, the grip almost possessive.
You tried not to look down, tried not to let your eyes drift to the answer to a question you’d been too proud to ask. Instead, a smirk tugged at the corner of your lips as you stepped into him, letting your palms slide up the hard planes of his chest, past his dogtags and looped around the back of his neck.
“I think this is going to do the opposite of cooling me down,” he muttered, voice husky, half-lost beneath the steady rhythm of water hitting tile.
You let out a soft, breathless laugh, and then you kissed him.
It wasn’t gentle.
Your mouths crashed together like you’d both been holding back for too long. Hungry. Desperate. Sloppy. The water only made it messier, lips sliding, catching, breath hissing as teeth grazed. He kissed like he needed to claim this moment before the world snapped back into place. You returned the kiss with equal urgency, fingers threading into his wet hair, tugging, needing more.
His hands slid down your back, firm, sure, guiding you until your spine pressed against the slick wall of the shower. You wrapped a leg around his hip, instinctive, needy, and he growled softly into your mouth as his hand dropped to support your thigh, holding you steady. You ground your hips into him, once, twice. His grip tightened, and the next thing you knew, he was lifting you, hands firm on your ass as he carried you effortlessly from the shower. The bathroom was thick with steam, fog curling along the edges of the mirror and dripping from the ceiling. Water trailed down both of you, soaking the tiles as he strode across the room.
Your back met the edge of the counter with a soft thud, followed by the chill of the fogged-up mirror behind you. The coolness shocked your skin and made your spine arch sharply, drawing a low noise from your throat. Bucky didn’t miss a beat. He was still kissing you, still swallowing your gasp as his hands ran down your thighs and urged them further apart.
He stepped in, slotting himself between your legs, his body flush against yours. The sensation of him made your head spin. Water from the still-running shower continued to hiss in the background, steam billowing out and filling the room like a cocoon. You were both soaked, skin slick and glistening, lips swollen, breaths short. Your fingers found the back of his neck again, anchoring yourself as he kissed you deeper, slower now, like he was savouring every second.
His hands slid down your hips and tugged you forward until your thighs bracketed his waist. You felt his cock, solid and insistent, pulsing against the sensitive skin of your inner thigh, and your breath caught.
“I think I’ve dreamt of this moment.” He confessed between kisses, before consuming you again.
It took little resistance for him to push into you in one smooth motion. You weren’t just drenched from the shower. Your whole body sang from the shock of it, a strangled sound tearing from your throat as your fingers fisted in his wet hair. His mouth tore from yours with a ragged gasp, trailing down your jaw, your neck, leaving fire in his wake. Bucky braced a hand behind you on the counter, the other gripping your thigh, steadying you as his hips began to move precise and relentless.
“Do you know how long I’ve thought about this?” he muttered into the curve of your neck, voice wrecked. His lips brushed against your pulse, the edge of his teeth grazing the skin like he was half a second from losing control. “How many nights I told myself I couldn’t touch you... shouldn’t want you, couldn’t have you.”
You let out a breathless laugh that quickly turned into a gasp as his hips snapped forward again. 
“Keep going,” you rasped, one hand clawing up the curve of his back, the other buried in his hair. “Don’t stop.”
His only reply was a low, broken groan against your skin, like he was coming apart just from the feel of you wrapped around him. You locked your ankles behind him and rocked your hips forward, drawing him deeper. A spark of pleasure flared up your spine, making your head fall back against the fogged-up mirror..
“I tried so fucking hard to keep my distance.” He chuckled low against your collarbone, though the sound was strained, caught between shallow pants and a raw groan of need. “You have no idea what you do to me.”
His vibranium hand slid between your bodies. His fingers found that sensitive bundle of nerves, circling with gentle strokes, and your body jolted in response. An uncontrollable whimper left you as your thighs trembled around him.
“I’ve been dying to hear those sounds from you.” Bucky panted against your ear. 
You pressed closer to him, shaking legs tightening around his waist as you pursued his fingers. He chuckled at your poorly hidden desperation, chest vibrating from the sound. As his fingers swirled, cock pumping in and out, you felt your body clench involuntarily around him, drawing a moan from him. 
“Fuck, Bucky, ” you breathed, barely able to form the word as your pleasure surged, unrelenting and dizzying. “If I’d known this was what you were holding back, I would’ve pushed harder.”
Bucky’s rhythm faltered, his thrusts becoming uneven and desperate, chasing the high he could feel coiling tighter in both of you. Your raw moans echoed around the small bathroom, rising above the hiss of the shower and the frantic beat of the slap of wet skin. Your climax broke over you like a wave crashing against the shore. Your entire body arched, legs trembling as you whimpered, lips parted, eyes squeezed shut. Pleasure tore through you like lightning, leaving your nerves sparking in its wake.
With a guttural groan muffled against your neck, Bucky followed you over the edge. You felt him twitch inside you, warmth spreading as he spilt into you, his hips stuttering erratically as he buried himself as deep as he could go. His arms tightened around you, as though he needed to hold you close to keep himself grounded.
For a long, breathless moment, you stayed like that. Tangled together, trembling, the heat of the afterglow. The water still rained behind you, forgotten, as you both came down slowly, limbs heavy and slick with sweat and steam. Then, slowly, Bucky lifted his head to look at you. His hair was plastered to his forehead in wet strands, water trailing down the lines of his cheekbones and along his jaw. His eyes, dark and hungry, searched yours with a mix of dazed satisfaction and something else. A flicker of awe, maybe. Or disbelief.
You gave him a slow, wicked smirk and reached up to brush a dripping lock of hair off his brow, your fingers lingering just a second longer than necessary.
“I need you to pull that transfer request, by the way,” you murmured, voice low and rough with breath. “There is no way in hell I’m training with Thor.”
His lips twitched, a hoarse laugh escaping him, short and surprised. But the fire in his gaze didn’t fade. If anything, it darkened.
“I’ll pull it…” he said, voice thick with promise as his hands slid back down to your waist, “…when I’m done with you.”
From the way his fingers gripped your hips, you had a feeling that wouldn’t be anytime soon. 
---
hello! i no longer have a taglist because it got too long and was reaching the tag limit. if you want to be notified when i post please follow @artficlly-updates and turn on post notifications!
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imstillalexcomic · 3 months ago
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Now, let me be totally clear here, I don’t think my dad was a bad guy by any stretch of the imagination.  I also think that if he were still around he wouldn’t be a Trump supporter.  He was a highly intelligent guy, so the “support Trump because ignorant” angle doesn’t apply, and even if he did possess the willful malice that it would otherwise take to get someone to vote red, he was highly protective of his kids and I think he’d be an advocate for me.
I genuinely believe his concern over maintaining the function of my “nuts” was less about the standard conservative belief that a major part of a human’s value is their reproductive ability, and more about him wanting me to have as many options as possible when I was an adult.
That said, it is pretty hilarious that right out of the gate I decided that I’d never want biological kids and at this point in my medical journey almost certainly can not. 
I COULD HAVE ENJOYED SO MANY MORE HOT TUBS.
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papayainsectorone · 2 months ago
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ice baths
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summary: Though young and still learning, Kimi’s natural stamina and desire to prove himself lead him to push boundaries
content: 18+! smutty smut smut smut (consider this a warning), nsfw descriptions, fingering, no protection
word count: 5,5k
pairing: kimi antonelli x fem!oc
a thought: I....I just don´t know what to say about this, i just finished writing this 30 seconds ago when Kimi came up on TV for a pre race interview in Miami on his fucking scooter and ... this feels illegal haha enjoy
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The physio room was quiet, humming with low fluorescent lights and the soft, rhythmic hiss of massage oil being pumped from a dispenser. Kimi sat on the edge of the treatment table, shirtless, hair still damp from his earlier run, cheeks flushed from exertion—or maybe something else. Something he was trying not to make too obvious.
Sergi, his physio, tilted Kimi’s head carefully to the side, stretching his neck.
Kimi groaned.
"Can you already prepare the ice bath?" Sergi asked, glancing your way.
“Uh—yeah. Sure.” You blinked, caught off guard. Not by the task. By the sound Kimi had just made.
You turned away quickly, cheeks warm, pretending the ice machine required your full concentration.
Still, you felt his eyes on you again.
You smiled. Subtle. Just enough to let him know you noticed. Just enough to invite him to keep looking.
He blushed. Fully. Bright pink down to his collarbones.
God, he was a boy.
But a very, very pretty one.
“It’s done,” Sergi finally said, clapping Kimi lightly on the shoulder. “Ice bath. Four minutes.”
It wasn’t the first time you'd been in the same room like this. You’d been shadowing under Sergi all week, watching training sessions, prepping hydration, tracking recovery metrics. But this—this had been happening from day one.
Kimi had been looking.
And not the fleeting, dismissive glance most teenage boys gave when they saw someone cute. These were longer. Curious. Almost confused—like he couldn’t quite figure out how you ended up near him.
When you glanced over your shoulder, his eyes dropped instantly. Guilty. Caught. Adorable.
You stepped aside as he walked toward the tub. He looked at it, then at you. Then back at the tub.
“You staying?” he asked, voice low.
You raised an eyebrow. “Should I not?”
“No, I mean—yes. I mean… it’s cold,” he mumbled, reaching for the waistband of his training shorts.
You leaned back against the bench, arms crossed, watching with more interest than you meant to show. He hesitated, then slid the shorts down, revealing tight black boxer-briefs underneath.
Nothing left to the imagination.
He caught you looking.
His ears turned red.
But you didn’t look away.
Kimi exhaled and stepped into the tub, arms braced on either side. The water hit his thighs and his whole body jumped. “Shit,” he hissed, his fingers tightening around the edge of the plastic.
“You’re not going to die,” you teased, walking over and crouching beside the tub.
“Easy for you to say,” he muttered, trying and failing to play it cool. “You’re not sitting in ice water in your underwear.”
Your eyes drifted down to where the waterline just hit his collarbones. His abs were tight, trembling slightly, his legs visibly tensed beneath the surface. His jaw clenched and unclenched.
Then he said it. Quiet. Not even fully confident.
“Maybe you can… help me warm up again in a minute.”
He looked stunned the second the words left his mouth. Like he hadn’t even meant to say them out loud.
Your lips twitched. “Oh?”
His eyes flicked to yours, uncertain—but he didn’t take it back.
You tilted your head, crouched beside the tub, one hand resting lightly on the rim near his. “That’s a bold request, Antonelli.”
Kimi laughed—awkward and breathy. “Was it?”
“You tell me.”
He looked away for a second, eyes flicking toward the door like he was checking if Sergi might walk back in. But you both knew the physio wouldn’t return until the timer beeped.
“No one’s stopping you,” he muttered.
Your smile deepened, and your fingertips brushed the edge of his hand where it gripped the tub. Just the smallest touch—but he stilled under it.
“So you want help warming up,” you said softly, watching him squirm beneath the question. “That’s new. Weren’t you blushing two seconds ago because I looked at your legs?”
He didn’t say anything.
Just looked at you.
Really looked.
Like he didn’t know whether to make a joke or let something real crack open between you.
You leaned a little closer, enough for your voice to drop. “You think I haven’t noticed the way you stare, Kimi?”
His throat bobbed with a swallow. “It’s not just staring.”
“No?” you asked, voice sweet. “What else is it, then?”
He shook his head slightly. “I dunno. Just—whenever you’re around I forget what I’m meant to be doing.”
You bit your lip.
That earnestness. That teenage honesty that slipped past filters. He didn’t even realize how much he was giving away.
Your hand ghosted along his forearm now, the water droplets beading and running where your fingers traced. “You always this distracted in cold baths?”
“Only when you’re next to me in tight leggings.”
You laughed—he made it sound innocent, but your stomach flipped anyway. Your fingers trailed back to his hand, slipping just slightly beneath his wrist. The contact was featherlight, but it sent a visible shiver up his arm.
He sucked in a breath. “It’s only supposed to be four minutes.”
You looked at the timer. “Still got two and a half.”
Kimi’s eyes dropped to your mouth.
You moved your hand again—now along his bicep, where his skin was warmer under the water. Your knees brushed the side of the tub, your body leaning in just enough to crowd his space without touching anything essential.
“You really cold?” you whispered.
He nodded, very slowly. “Freezing.”
“Hm.” You leaned even closer now, lips near his ear. “Poor baby.”
He tensed under the teasing, like the words hit lower than they were meant to.
Then he turned his face slightly, and you realized just how close you were—barely an inch between your mouths.
His voice was quiet, rougher now. “You’re not helping.”
You smiled. “Aren’t I?”
You didn’t kiss him.
Not yet.
But your thumb traced a slow, lazy line across his inner forearm, feeling his pulse skip under your touch. His boxer-briefs were soaked and clinging, the outline of him obvious now, impossible to miss even in the cold water.
He let out the faintest, helpless sound.
And the timer beeped.
You smiled and stood. “Four minutes. You’re done.”
Kimi stared up at you, dumbfounded.
You grabbed a towel and tossed it toward him, eyes glinting. “Dry off, Antonelli. We’ll see if you still need warming up once you’re not half-frozen.”
He blinked, grabbing the towel with wet fingers, his mouth slightly open like he had words but couldn’t figure out what to say.
You didn’t wait.
You turned and walked toward the locker benches—slowly, hips swaying just a little too deliberately.
And Kimi?
You could feel his eyes on you the whole way.
You didn’t make it far.
You’d barely reached the corner of the locker room when you heard the soft thud of wet footsteps behind you.
Then: “Wait.”
You turned—and he was right there. Hair damp, towel half-wrapped around his waist, droplets trailing down his chest. His face was flushed, pupils blown wide. And he looked like he’d made up his mind in the last five seconds.
“Kimi—”
But he didn’t let you finish. Just like last time.
His mouth crashed into yours with the kind of force that only came from pure, boyish urgency. He kissed like he couldn’t stop himself—messy, too fast, breathless—but god, it made your knees go weak.
You caught the edge of the lockers behind you to steady yourself, his hands still wet as they slid to your waist. He kissed like he’d been holding back for days. Maybe weeks. Maybe since the first moment your hands brushed while you passed him the resistance bands and he blushed so hard he had to look away.
You gasped when his lips left yours to trail down your jaw. “Kimi—slow down—”
“I can’t.” He mumbled it into your neck, kissing, biting just enough to make you shiver. “I’ve been thinking about it too much. I can’t slow down.”
His towel slipped as he pressed closer, his cold and damp and very, very hard against you. There was nothing shy about him now—not in the way his hands gripped your hips or how his thigh slid between yours, grinding just enough to make you gasp.
You let your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging gently. “You’re really not holding back.”
He looked up at you then, flushed and wrecked already. “I don’t know how.”
There was something so hot about the honesty. No games. No pretenses. Just a beautiful, breathless boy who wanted you badly and didn’t know how to pretend otherwise.
You kissed him again, slower this time, tongue teasing the seam of his lips until he opened with a soft whine. He groaned when you sucked his bottom lip, his hips rocking against yours instinctively. He was desperate, but trying—trying to make it good, trying to do something right even through the haze.
“Touch me,” he said against your mouth, voice cracking just a little.
You smiled. “Where?”
“Anywhere. Please.”
That please made heat coil deep in your belly.
Your hand dropped between you, brushing the towel aside completely, reaching in his boxers and when you finally wrapped your fingers around him—hot, already leaking, twitching in your grip—his knees buckled.
“Fuck,” he choked, hips jerking forward. “Sorry—I’m—fuck—”
You laughed softly against his neck, stroking slow and deliberate.
“I haven’t—I didn’t even—fuck—” He was panting now, forehead pressed to your shoulder. “I swear, I can go again. I swear.”
That only made you hotter.
You squeezed just slightly, thumb tracing the tip, and that was it.
Kimi whimpered and came.
Fast. Hard. All over your hand, your waistband, his own stomach. His whole body shook with it, face buried against your neck like he couldn’t stand to see himself lose it that quickly.
You held him there, gentle, fingers still trailing over his sensitive skin while he caught his breath.
“Shit,” he whispered again. “I didn’t mean—fuck, I didn’t mean to come like that.”
You cupped his jaw, made him look at you. “Kimi. You’re fine.”
He looked so embarrassed.
But also so wrecked. Eyes dark, mouth swollen from kissing, chest heaving.
“I can go again,” he repeated, almost pleading. “Give me like… two minutes. I swear. Just don’t—don’t leave.”
You grinned. “I’m counting on it.”
His breath was still ragged when he finally pulled back to look at you. His lashes were damp, cheeks still flushed, but his hands didn’t leave your waist. He held you like you might vanish if he let go.
“I didn’t mean for it to be that fast,” he said again, quieter this time. “You just… you’re so—”
You kissed him gently, interrupting whatever apology was about to come. “It’s okay, Kimi. Really.”
But he still looked like he had something else to say.
After a long pause, he asked, voice barely above a whisper, “Can I… touch you?”
Your heart thudded.
There was something about the way he said it—so shy, like the thought alone made his head spin, but he wanted to. Badly. And it wasn’t just lust. It was something tender in the way his fingers skimmed your hip, how he was looking at you like you were untouchable—but he still wanted to try.
You nodded slowly. “Yeah. You can.”
His eyes flicked up to yours, searching. “You’ll tell me if I do it wrong?”
You smiled. “There’s no wrong. Just start slow.”
His hands moved tentatively, reverent almost, as he slid them beneath your shirt. The fabric rose inch by inch, baring your skin to the cool air. He kissed your shoulder, then your collarbone, lips soft, like he was still trying to prove he deserved to be this close.
“You’re so soft,” he murmured, almost like he didn’t mean to say it out loud.
You helped him tug the shirt off, and when your bra followed, his breath caught. He stared like he couldn’t believe you were real, his hands hovering like he didn’t know if he was allowed to touch.
So you took them, guided them to your chest.
And he groaned—actually groaned—when he felt you.
His thumbs brushed your nipples, watching your face as if every reaction you gave was a gift. And when you moaned softly, his eyes fluttered shut, like that sound alone could undo him all over again.
“You’re gonna kill me,” he whispered.
You leaned in, nipped his jaw. “Only if you stop.”
He didn’t.
You could now understand why they called him the wonder child in Formula 1.
Because even now—barely out of breath, cheeks still pink, hands a little shaky—he was learning. Fast. Not confident, not exactly, but observant. Focused. Like he was reading you in real time and adapting with every tiny shift in your breath, every gasp that escaped your lips.
His fingers were unsure at first—slightly clumsy, like he didn’t know whether to squeeze or stroke—but he watched your face like it was the telemetry screen of a quali lap. Every whimper you gave him, every arch of your spine, he adjusted to it. Like he couldn’t not try to be better at this too.
When his mouth dipped to your chest, his lips were soft and hesitant. He kissed there like he was still convincing himself it was okay—that he was allowed to taste. But when he drew one nipple into his mouth and you let out a sharp gasp, his confidence grew. His tongue circled, tentative at first, then firmer, guided by your breathy “yes, just like that.”
He smiled against your skin.
That little bit of feedback clearly went straight to his ego.
Still, his hands drifted lower, down your stomach, fingers brushing the waistband of your leggings. He looked up at you again, flushed and slightly wild-eyed. “Is this okay?”
You nodded, and he took that permission like a green light.
He tugged them down slowly, revealing more of you, eyes flicking down and then back up like he was making sure he didn’t miss a thing. When his fingers slipped between your thighs, he sucked in a breath.
“God…” he murmured. “You’re—wow.”
You laughed, breathless. “Not much of a compliment, but I’ll take it.”
“No, I mean—” he looked up, lips parted, eyes dark, “I’ve never—this is... crazy.”
But still, he didn’t hesitate.
His fingers explored, tracing slowly, learning what made your legs shift, what made you grip the edge of the bench. At first, too soft, then a bit too fast, but every time you moaned or murmured something back—“slower,” “right there,” “don’t stop”—he adjusted. The way he focused on your reactions made your head spin.
And when he finally found just the right rhythm—just enough pressure, just the right spot—you swore under your breath, and his jaw clenched.
“I’m doing it right?” he whispered, breath catching.
You let out a soft, broken laugh. “Very right.”
His grin was a little crooked, a little boyish—and full of wonder. He kept going, fingers slick and steady now, one hand bracing on your thigh as the other worked you. The trembling in your legs only seemed to make him more determined.
“Tell me when,” he said, voice almost reverent.
And when your hips bucked and your back arched—when you came undone on his fingers—he looked like he’d just won a Grand Prix.
You were still catching your breath, your thighs trembling around his hand, when you felt him stiffen—really stiffen. Not just his fingers now, but all of him. He was still inside you, slow and gentle with his movements, but something about the way you clenched around him—reflexively, instinctively—sent a visible jolt up his spine.
His lips parted like he was about to say something, but then he exhaled sharply through his nose, eyes fluttering closed. "Merda…"
He shuddered.
Just a small squeeze, a shift in your hips, and you felt it—the unmistakable way he tensed and gasped, like someone had pulled the air from his lungs. His forehead dropped to your shoulder for a moment, and his fingers stilled inside you.
“Cazzo…” he muttered, voice tight and ragged. “I—I —”
You blinked, and then realized. His boxers were soaked at the front. Still tight around his hips, but dark and damp now where he’d just—
He looked up at you, horrified and flushed. “I didn’t— I mean, I didn’t even—shit.”
You bit back a grin. He looked devastated, like he’d just crashed into a wall at turn one.
“Kimi.” You touched his face, gently.
He looked up at you like you’d just handed him a lifeline. “It’s not okay. I didn’t even… I didn’t get to do anything for you.”
“You did,” you said with a soft smile, squeezing his wrist where his hand still rested between your thighs. “Very much.”
His mouth opened, then closed. He looked utterly lost.
You leaned closer. “Besides,” you whispered, brushing your lips over his cheek, “you’ve got stamina, right?”
His eyes lit up, like something in him clicked. His breath caught as you kissed just beneath his ear.
“I… I do,” he said, more to himself than to you. His voice cracked a little, but his eyes held fire now.
He sat up straighter, jaw tight. “I can go again. I want to go again.”
And this time, there was no hesitation in the way he reached for you.
His mouth crashed into yours, all teeth and heat and desperation. You barely registered being lifted and eased back until your shoulder blades hit the narrow locker room bench. It wobbled beneath you, squeaking faintly against the tile, but the way he gripped your hips left no room for second thoughts.
He shoved his boxers down just enough to free himself—already hard again, thick and flushed—and lined himself up with a breathless groan. One deep thrust and he was inside you again, filling you so suddenly you gasped.
The stretch made your eyes flutter, but there was no time to settle into it—he was already moving, fast and rough, hips snapping with a kind of urgency that bordered on frantic. The bench rocked under both of you, and his hands tightened on your thighs like he was holding on for dear life.
“Fuck,” he hissed. “Too good, it’s—fuck, I’m not gonna last—”
You could feel it. He was right there on the edge again, the way his rhythm stuttered, how his thighs trembled against yours. But you weren’t there yet—your body straining for more, that tight coil inside you still winding, aching.
“Kimi,” you gasped, grabbing for his wrist. “Touch me.”
His eyes snapped to yours. Understanding hit in a rush, and he didn’t hesitate. One hand slid between your bodies, fingers slick with sweat and your arousal, and found your clit.
The moment he started rubbing—messy, desperate, but exactly what you needed—it hit you like a wave. You arched, cried out, everything tightening as the orgasm slammed into you, hard and sudden. Your body clenched around him, and that was it.
He came with a broken sound, hips jerking deep inside you as he spilled into you. Hot. Endless.
Neither of you moved for a moment. Just panting. Trembling.
Then reality hit him.
“Wait—fuck—” His voice cracked. “I didn’t use a condom. Shit. I didn’t even—”
You opened your eyes to see him staring at you, wide-eyed, breath shallow.
“I didn’t mean to,” he said quickly, his hands shaking. “I wasn’t thinking—I just—” He swallowed hard. “Are you on anything? I should’ve asked. Shit.”
You reached for him, found his face with both hands, and gently pulled him down until your foreheads touched.
“I’m on the pill,” you said softly, steadying your breath. “It’s okay.”
He blinked, stunned. Still braced above you, his chest heaving.
“I mean it,” you whispered. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
His face twisted—relief, guilt, awe, all crashing into each other—but he nodded. “I just—fuck. I don’t usually lose control like that.”
You smiled faintly. “Maybe you needed to.”
A beat passed. Then, slowly, he pulled back.
And when he did—when he slipped out of you, both of you still so wet, so raw—his breath hitched.
He stared.
Your legs were still open, thighs trembling, and his cum was already starting to spill from your lips, slow and thick, slicking down to the bench.
“Dio mio,” he whispered. His voice dropped to something low, reverent.
His fingers ghosted over your thigh, like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing.
“You’re…” He shook his head once, lips parted, still breathless. “You’re so full of me.”
You watched his face, the stunned hunger there. He looked like a man who’d just witnessed something sacred.
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darker-than-darkstorm · 2 years ago
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I was going to make a joke about the 1960s Moby Dick cartoon, but this series of events is so much better.
modern day moby dick but my white whale is a middle grade fantasy novel i read when i was like eleven and haven't been able to find again
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acid-ixx · 1 month ago
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Getting hyper fixated on the loving family series i was wondering if you could write a scenario in which the reader is kinda forced to appear at an event where Bruce is and he and the rest of the family watch as the reader shows up with Clark and Jon with a beautiful suit/dress (preferably a suit but either is okay) and the outfit so stunning the rest of the room can’t help but stare in awe and the batfam has to sit there and watch while the reader is living their best life and perhaps some smug attitude from Clark as Bruce notices some not so hidden love bites on the readers body. And death glares from the bat siblings as Jon is being super cuddly and loving with the reader to purposefully rile up Damien and the others???
all eyes on the prize p.t. 1 (a loving family, an unpalatable desire two-shot)
ft. yandere superfam x gn! neglected spouse reader x yandere batfam
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reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.
— masterlist !
— a/n: implied nsfw between clark and the reader but no actual smut scene. also, interpret the reader as any gender!!! i personally put them in a suit cause it's not only classy but it's a very flexible and stylistic choice when it comes to fashion. clark is described as way larger, broader (due to kryptonian genes) than the reader but not taller, same with bruce, but i still tried to keep the reader as neutral as possible when it came to their appearance.
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being the affair partner of a pulitzer price winning journalist was no easy feat.
being recognized by fans of his in public and having to sign their favorite articles of his was an alright task for you, having candid photos taken without your knowledge at every small outing you have with your little family was a fate you've already prepared for, even bump ins with other aspiring journalists who wish to live under clark's shadow, hearing them ramble about their passions on the side of the street whilst begging you to promote their own written entries to your partner was at least tolerable—
because those instances were far more easier to cope with than an upcoming gala.
because at least those moments still guaranteed your mental stability since all you really had to worry about were deranged conspiracists with no real power over you — over clark and his naturally protective kryptonian instincts which easily signals him to drop off his current missions and to swoop you in his loving arms whenever he senses you're truly in trouble — who can only ever type in newer theories that are quickly disputed by the fans who were always in favor of your current affair over your miserable marriage from months ago.
so yeah, it was safe to say that over the course of the months where you were safely tucked in your new home life, back when bruce and the others weren't aware of your affair; you'd never really had an excuse to worry about anything else.
really, clark's strong hands wrapped protectively around the expanse of your waist whilst he flies you around metropolis on one of your little dates, alongside jon convincing you to take him out to buy another tub of ice cream were enough assurances that your domestic life right now is all a perfect bubble that could never be popped by whatever bullshit the wayne's might've planned against your little family could ever do.
really, you thought you were so cunning.
— but a charity event hosted by the bruce wayne in acknowledgement for the daily planet all of a sudden? a gala you're sure would guarantee the presence of your ex-family, aware of the infamous affair you had with clark kent?
a gala where your new family was required to attend, not just for the sake of publicity, but because the invitation contained thinly veiled threats admitting that clark might — or would — lose his job if he didn't bring you along?
an invitation sent to him a week prior, that he'd kept hidden from a cabinet you rarely open. to which he thought you wouldn't notice his skittishness for the past few days, except your human intuition begged your intrigue, to investigate upon your partner's sudden source of stress.
so here you are now. breathless in the middle of your bedroom, stunned as you feel blood rise to your head.
and as much as clark comforts you through his warm chest covering your entirely shaken body as he softly coos on your neck, warm breath fanning against the sudden cold washing over your body; as much as jon tries to reassure you that you've nothing to worry about as his tiny, yet strong hands, tries to pry off the crumpled piece of paper in your grip, reeking of bruce's favorite cologne you'd always have to endure when sleeping in the same empty bed of his back then, as much as conner jokes around right beside you, holding your arms and helping your levitate with his telekinesis in case you might collapse from the shock— as much as your family tries to feed your disillusioned thoughts that everything is okay, even they couldn't deny the cold, hard truth: you all are attending the wretched gala either way.
the company's head passing on the message that clark and, in implied provocation and extension, you, are going to be the star of the show was enough of a guarantee that your family had to be there.
the ornate, black box laced with silken ribbons of your favorite color, laying upon the simple, white bedsheets of your shared bed with clark, its fancy design clashing with the simplicity of your bedroom and standing out, lid slightly ajar, revealing a decadent pair of pearl earrings – no doubt real, and expensive and taunting – and the infamous diamond encrusted ring you thought you'd thrown away was enough of a mockery, enough of a warning that there's more than just rivalry between clark and his old friend—
but a simple statement that even if you managed to temporarily dislodge your old family away from your life, even if you'll push and shove away at your ex-children's attempt of communication with you, even if you wrote off your last name as kent; you ultimately still belong to the wayne's.
and that's enough of a statement which brews a bitter storm inside of clark's heart. makes him want to retaliate, not with a physical fight against the bat, no, he doesn't want you to worry your pretty head anymore than the cruelty his old comrade had already done; but with his own little statement against bruce in this gala, with his own twist which he knows will floor his rival's jaws to the floor once the scheduled gala will come the day after.
for now, though?
he gestures conner with a look, one he often shares to the other kid of his: where he wants him to take jon elsewhere, preferably far away from the house, and leave you two couples some space to think through your choices.
one that says, "i'll have this handled," without so much a word uttered, as conner nods in reply before ushering jon with the same look and a gentle promise that they'll play some games overnight in his apartment instead. jon, as hesitant and oblivious as he is to let go of his tight grip on your shirt, pouts and releases his hold, but not without flying to kiss your dampened cheeks and whispering: "you'll be alright, dad/mom. we'll keep you safe."
then they both leave within the flashing seconds.
when your confused, downward gaze, eyes lined with a fresh wave of tears shifts to the scene in front of you — the family working in tandem with no verbal cues — just right before you could even question clark what he's planning; he shushes you, kissing the crown of your head with the softest smile he could plaster upon his face, a mask ignoring the cruel urge to fly over to gotham, redirecting the rage, transforming it into the adoration he feels for you at this moment, at every passing moment.
at least in the safety of your bedroom, his ultimate prize is still in his arms: willing and gilded in a way bruce could never earn.
he'll make sure the man knows of this the next day.
for now, he turns you to face him as his hand directs itself to the back of your waist, squeezing reassuringly, his other palm cupping the fat of your cheeks, swiping away the salty trails until his thumb and index reaches your bottom lip, pinching lightly. you stare back at his slightly squinted eyes, no doubt capturing you in slow motion just to embrace every little feature of yours, and hold on to his broad shoulders, relaxing from your hold.
but it's you who still doesn't calm down, it's you who still needlessly worries. and clark doesn't like it when his sweetheart thinks of anything else if not him and your family.
not the wayne's.
"what now, clark?" you graze the furrowed crease of his brows with your thumbs, massaging. he hums, laughing at your antics of helping him relax, then leans in to peck your lips, exhaling heartily when you pout at his refusal to reply.
what you didn't notice, though, were the hands suddenly wrapped around your thighs, your thoughts too messy, mind too slow, to comprehend your back pressed against the mattress and the fancy box discared on the rug with a gentle thud.
his breath tickling the core of your ears was the first thing you sensed.
"what now, you ask?*
both your clothes were discarded faster than the heat crawling up your face and the shivers running up your spine.
his mouth made immediate work on your neck all the way to your collarbone, sucking your vulnerable skin until it turns into deep shades of purples clashing with yellow. he bites a little harder when you squeak and tangle your fingers on his messy curls, then teases you with skilled fingers kneading your inner thighs.
he pins you down, you can feel the hairs of his chest pressing against your bare ones, and yet you don't push away, finally realizing the implications of his actions. what he intends for bruce to see, for the world to see.
"—i say we need to show bruce what he's been missing out on this whole time."
a longer, more passionate kiss was enough to set the deal.
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the flash of the ever-so insisting paparazzi were as overwhelming as you can expect.
loud, insistent, buzzing with energy at the latest gossip and questions enough to hurl even great thinkers into a mind numbing spiral. they picture your every move, record your every reaction, and twist words spoken into their spit-encased microphone into delirious titles for the media to digest.
yet as invasive as they were, it was one of the legal ways he can obtain your pictures without you or clark suspecting a thing or two for these past few months; living in your own space without doubting if your private life was as private as you'd thought it'd be.
what with damian sneaking off and hitching a ride with jason on his motorcycle just to watch you from afar, standing right outside your apartment with baited breath, going as far as picking your locks and entering just to get a whiff of the life they'd miss without you? or tim hacking through surveillance cameras in areas you frequent, capturing every little smile of yours and pasting it in a bulletin board as a means to gain inspiration? all in the guise of needing you alive—?
suffice to say he was grateful for the media's thirst for drama. it gave off less suspicions, made it so that superman doesn't feel the need to be following his tail after unneeded circumstances where his own children had been caught in the same space as you in public.
it helped track you down: the constant headlines mentioning your name, vicki vale and a bunch of other no-named journalists would often be caught in the spiral of keeping the internet interested in the tale of your affair.
their performance was satisfactory.
and yet it doesn't dismiss the fact that because his life had always been centered around yours — and in his due ignorance, his missed priorities, it was he who was also the reason as to why you left the safety of your manor — that also meant his involvement in the internet's latest drama.
he always has been, but sometimes, even he gets tired.
bruce wayne can handle the element of crime, can help sweep off blood-soaked streets, fund the countless hospitals rattling with new patients of the villains he had dealt with, pay for students' debts, and rehabilitate victims of the corrupt system—
but he can never control the public and their opinions.
especially when it came to him and his... ex-spouse.
bitter as the title tastes on his tongue, right now, he feels their prying eyes swarming his body as he stands by the high arch of the entranceway, sculpted body illuminated by the moonlight stretching across the horizon, reflected by the dangling chandeliers casting a sickening orange light; quite frankly, the warmth of the colors doesn't bring comfort upon the anxiety creeping right beneath his skin.
he can hear the gossip and expectations for what is to come, the crowd's own speculations all but mere background talk to him as he focuses solely on the countless of familiar faces passing between thick, mahogany doors, initiating greeting with every entering folk; a false smile plastered on his weary face, a controlled crinkle of his eyes, overly saccharine hello's burying the barely disguised disinterest in their brief conversations before another wave of people come in.
the earpiece tucked in his right ears are flooded with anticipatory conversation about when or if you're going to arrive.
he can't deny his own patience waning as his eyes scan the countless piercing ones amongst the crowd, singling out his children making talk with other guests as a way to pass time.
tim's entertaining the guests, used to the constant socialization required due to his upbringing, he emits a hearty laugh at someone's joke: light, yet empty at the seams. duke tries – but fails – to follow his lead, adjusting to the change in scenery; he pretends to be shocked by the drama occurring between the socialites, sneering under his breath at their ridiculously obvious bragging about another new, undeserved property bought, preferring to focus elsewhere.
damian's doing well under dick's guidance, making an actual effort to disguise his contempt for the crowd, communicating with some and faking awe, yet whenever he scoffs openly, dick subtly glares at the smaller child as warning which prompts him to shut up momentarily. meanwhile, jason is properly hidden behind the sculpted columns, hawk eyes assessing every known guests and providing updates to the family in the comms for suspicious activity.
barbara chose to fancy herself in the batcave, with access to the security cameras plastered on every corner and outside the venue's premises. steph and cass are together, munching on the buffets and assessing which pastry dish is the best, they ignore the other guests trying to talk to them whilst they play with the fancy clams displayed in the corner of the table.
all of them, committing to their own, unique way of passing time—
and yet they all share the same, disinterested gaze as bruce.
choosing to return brief eye contact with him, raising their brows, as if they're all asking the same question:
"where are they, bruce?"
(because, after all, the only purpose of this gala, and their willingness to cooperate with one another without bickering, is to finally share the same space with you after months of silent treatment, months of your lack of cooperation for a counseling session between troubled couples with bruce, months of being held in another man's arms, littered with kisses that aren't his own, spending moments with another child— superman's, no less. and under his protection and attention, you are no doubt invulnerable for any opportunities of kidnapping. at least, in this event, even if it's just for a temporary moment. for confirmation, maybe, that you're safe and sound and happy and thriving without them, and that maybe they'll be glad that you chose clark and his family over them).
them and their undeniable sin of ignoring you.
sure, they should've been glad you left and never turned back. he should've been grateful that there was one less person worrying over him.
(but he knows, deep down, bruce knows it in his sick, twisted mind that it's never what they wanted. bruce knows that they needed you).
so when you finally entered the fray, it was no denying that they all felt the same, compelling and magnetic pull that you've always had — that they chose to turn their backs on, that they discovered all too late was something they yearned for — garnering all of their sporadic attention into one singular being: you.
"oh my god, bruce... they're..."
gorgeous? quite the eye-catcher? the moment everybody's all been waiting for? the reason why this event was hosted in the first place? there's no need to voice out the obvious, no denying that more than anything, you weren't anything less than desirable for the eyes of many.
god, he gulps and feels the parchness of his throat, feels perspiration sliding down his adam's, sinfully he admits that his hunger for you tonight might've multiplied.
his shaky blue eyes share a brief, yet cutting contact with yours, at your dismissive ones staring at him before it ultimately returns to your partner— and he feels the same spark he's felt all those years ago, the same gluttony, the same green envy at every person who shares a close relationship with you prior your marriage to his.
then he remembers why he's willed himself to turn his back on you: you're the reason why bruce forced himself to avoid you— he was afraid, unprepared that the moment you stepped into his life, that if he felt your skin's electrifying contact with his, if he heard that fucking voice of yours tempting him to take a break from being the bat and instead spend a night with him in bed, in your arms, if he feels so much of your warm breath hitting against his bare skin? he might lose himself in the plot; given up his entire life just to feel your body fused with his.
he knew the risk, he wasn't simply ready to take it, wasn't ready for the domesticity of it all.
and now he realizes, his life's always been devoted to you. and also, he's ultimately fucked up his chances of bringing you back into the family without complaints.
"you'd think they change for the worse or so, but no... they're still as charming, bruce— just better now. look, nobody's taking their eyes off of 'em, and they even bought the little kid–"
"— fucking hell. bruce, if you don't move your ass to greet them right now, i'm going to—"
dick's momentary lapse of amazement was interrupted by a series of swears from jason. sworning at him too, probably, about his ultimate talent for fumbling his best asset, about him losing someone so hellishly tempting, about why he's glued to his place, stunned to even plaster a welcoming smile when he hears your polished, black pointed shoes clacking across the marbled floors.
but he doesn't focus on their blurring words and conjoined awes. he doesn't even take his eyes off of your own fingers intertwined with clark's, the silver wedding band he's seen in the pictures still attached to your ring finger, instead of the diamond ones he's sent over to your apartment as a means of apologies.
his attention doesn't waver at all, not when he's too busy losing his breath over... you.
not when he zeroes in at the sickening sight before him—
dazzling as you were, adorned with a loose, white shirt – unbuttoned, just to give bruce and the crowd around you a glance of your clavicle – peeking out of the layered, gray vest, a blazer draped over your shoulder, and a tie sits loosely at the base of your outfit to complete the simple look; as if that would distract everyone from the sight of the fresh love marks littering the entirety of your neck all the way to the exposed clavicle. as if the sight of your slightly swollen lips doesn't suggest that you've probably made out with your affair partner before even entering the premise, not when he can already pinpoint the equally, if not more, bitten lips of clark and your favorite gloss unwiped from the side of his mouth.
fresh, newly gifted marks for the world to see. bruce can picture it, your heated flesh bitten and sucked over and over again the night prior to the event. how clark could easily conjure sweet noises from the back of your throat, how he must've known, must've burnt the taste of your saliva, sweat and salty, pleasured tears into every pore of his tongue until all his appetite caters only to you.
and you're wearing the same damn lapel pins. one of your favorite flowers that he's seen his own comrade wore before in a similar event. it's not just his own rival claiming you, it's you openly showing everyone that you've already been taken.
clark and his children, not yours – he can accept being cheated on, but he'll never allow you the comfort of replacing your own children – conner and jon, stand beside you, sharing the same colors for his own outfit. the man's nose held high, way too high for a man who pretends like he didn't just snatch off his own damn spouse right behind his back.
yet all he could do was squint his eyes, glare profusely, ignore the hastened thumping in his heart, the green envy flooding his vision. teeth clenched in controlled irritation, he's positioned perfectly so the camera's wouldn't easily capture his reaction, but even then does he feel the need for a mediocrum of control, but he can't. he can't control the visceral urge to pull out his kryptonite reserves hidden temptingly inside the batcave; he can't deny just how crazy you're already driving him despite having never felt your own touch for a long, grueling time.
he only snaps out of his stupor when you're only two strides left. when the light hits your sparkling eyes and reflects your obviously lovelorn gaze at the man whose biceps you wrap your hands around, who returns the gaze with a deeper intensity until your attention ultimately shifts to your own husband in front of you.
suddenly, the deafening whispers hollowed itself out.
suddenly, your eyes become dull and lifeless under the chandelier's warm glow.
not unforgivingly bitter, not even a hint of rage— but empty and unthinkingly cold, like the wick of a candle fully blown out. like the silence right after a wave of fireworks.
a warmth that yields, reminding bruce of your love that burned away for year without anymore fuel to sustain it. unrequited, like the presence he never graced you with.
decades worth of training and fighting on the cruel streets of gotham could never prepare bruce for the hammering beats of his chest, it could never quite dull down the feeling of heartbreak encapsulated in one single, desolate stare. he's sure clark could hear his own hastened pulse, his eyes flicker quickly to his own friend's victorious, yet still worried gaze; but nothing else quite matters other than your own swollen lips struggling to make out words and the subtle furrow of your brows at just what to say to the man you thought you'd never see eye to eye.
you look so perfectly dolled up despite being so disturbingly marked up from head to toe.
nothing else matters right now other than having to greet them like normal, he convinces himself, except the fact that he could feel his own sweat running down his flushed neck and his own teeth biting down his lower lips, and his squinted eyes drifting lower and lower from your eyes all the way down to the pridefully displayed hickeys.
nothing else matters, except for bruce's own thoughts meandering on his own fantasies of just what your body would taste like once he's sought out to forcibly take you away from clark's arm and back into his own.
nothing else matters, other than the thoughts of possibly wanting to give you another child when he sees you momentarily distracted by jon pulling on your blazer and whispering about his boredom, only to be lightly scolded with a gentle graze of hands atop his curly hair, or conner's grumbling from beneath his breath about just ditching the greetings and flying off to the buffet, only to be met with your fluttering laughter and a pat on his back, whispering into the boy's ears— that bruce can't pick up with just his hearing, he reminds himself to go over the camera feed soon to enhance the audio, just to hear that lovely voice of yours — words enough to make the metahuman surrender for just a moment; the scene awefully reminds him a lot of the way his own mother used to tell him off with just a loving hush and a pinch of his cheeks—
goodness, you're everything his own children need right now. a guiding light, a dutifully great figure to discipline their rebellious attitudes.
and he gulps, then suddenly, the slacks he chose to wear just feels a tad bit tighter. suddenly, he's grateful that he chose to wear something more loose tonight.
"pleasure to see you, too, bruce." instead of your voice greeting him, instead of bruce finally having to hear you for the first time outside of the cameras his family has set up or hacked all throughout the places you frequently visit, it's clark's voice which breaks through the immersion when it should've been yours greeting him.
"what's up, mister wayne? how's life in the manor without my lovely parent, huh?"
conner follows through with his unwelcoming, all too lighthearted, all too mocking with his question before clark could even silence the young, all too passionate boy's unneeded comment, as if shoving bruce's mistake right in his face would prove something.
it's enough to irk him, really. he really has to remind himself to hold off on the kryptonite, for now.
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and right now, all his focus should be on at least charming you enough tonight to convince you to return to your rightful family, as he ignores both clark and conner's greetings, immediately aiming for your wrist to bring it up to his lips.
your surprised yelp doesn't deter him from kissing your knuckles deeply while keeping eye contact with you, the abundance of cheers from the comms attached in his ears doesn't either.
all that matters right now, is that he has his eyes on the prize, and he's not willing to give it up any further.
a/n: firstly this first part is dedicated to both @luffyadolover and @neerathebrightstar !! since it's the former's BIRTHDAY !!! and if you're reading this, i wish to greet you with the happiest celebration with the yummiest cake and hopefully this fic is enough to make u even happier too !! and for the latter, neera, i'd love to thank u for ur unwavering support and talking to me and allowing me to yap about my own series' ! thank you both for your love, mwah mwah 🩷 <3
otherwise, leave comments please ? 🥺 my confidence in my writing has been at an all time low sadly, though i admit that i loved writing about bruce go from angsty to horny to straight up both. this was supposed to be a short fic, why did it suddenly become really long erm??? the second part will be posted tomorrow night !! for context, i always post around 12 to 4:00am at gmt +8 since i'm most active at night !! love y'all ! don't forget to leave remarks since i love reading through them it's like my main motivation.
taglist: @imjustasimp132 , @mimiiiiiiiiisstuff , @chericia , @queenofspades403 , @naina326 , @neerathebrightstar , @lilyalone, @nickey-diano , @tsuniio , @ssak-i , @kore-of-the-underworld , @lollipoppersposts , @peptox , @kdjhubby , @weirdcore-fantasy , @thypplover , @asdfghjklgayblog , @prince-nikko , @phoenixgurl030 , @antionwithadrawingpen , @circe143 , @ferchu0406 , @kittzu , @yuyuzi-ling , @moonieper , @esthxio , @ryuushou , @nickey-diano , @ssak-i
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sab0dssey · 4 months ago
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NewlyDad!Simon who is completely lost in panic and joy. When he first found out you were pregnant, right after he returned from a mission, it hit him like a wave. He was over the moon, but also overwhelmed. Simon had never been a man with many words; he was always terse, practical, and to the point. But this news? It was different. The moment he learned, his entire world shifted. His usually steady hands trembled as he looked at you, his eyes wide with disbelief and awe.
For a moment, he just stared, not knowing what to say, his mind racing. Then, before either of you could react, he pulled you into him—his arms wrapping around you so tightly, it was as if he never wanted to let go. His head buried itself in your neck, as though it was the only place he could find any grounding. It was so quiet between you both, just the sound of his breaths and the weight of the moment hanging in the air.
He stayed like that for what felt like eternity, unwilling to move. You could feel the warmth of his tears against your skin, but he didn’t pull away, didn’t make a sound. He knew you could feel the silent sobs, the emotion he didn’t want to let out in front of you, but he also knew you understood. He didn’t want you to see him like this—vulnerable and unsure. Not yet. But still, he couldn’t bring himself to let go, not even for a second.
NewlyDad!Simon never lets you do anything on your own. Never. You’re reaching for the remote, and it’s just a foot away? Don’t bother standing up—he’s already got it. You’re thinking about cooking? Forget it. He won’t let you. He’ll either cook for you himself or order your favorite meal—just so you don’t have to lift a finger.
NewlyDad!Simon is like a clingy little puppy—he just can’t keep his hands to himself. At home, he’s glued to you, constantly cuddling, wrapping himself around you like a human blanket. Outside, his hands always find their way to you—resting on your baby bump, the small of your back, or your waist. He just can’t help it.
Even when you’re relaxing in the tub, basking in the candlelit warmth, Simon refuses to let you have a moment alone. He pulls up a chair beside the tub, work files in hand, pretending to focus—but his hands betray him. One moment, they’re on your bump, the next, tracing lazy circles over your shoulder. He’s not letting go anytime soon. Not now, not ever
NewlyDad!Simon who loves to talk with his baby. His hands, large and gentle, find their way to your growing belly with a tenderness that surprises even him.
Every chance he gets, whether it’s in the quiet moments of the day or just before sleep, his hand rests there, as if the touch itself is a promise. He caresses your belly, his fingers lightly tracing the curve, his palm pressed against you like he’s trying to connect with the tiny life growing inside. It’s almost as though he can feel every tiny movement, even when it’s just a flutter.
He talks to the baby—quiet, low words that are almost a whisper, but they carry so much weight. His voice softens every time he speaks, and it’s a tone you’ve never heard before, one filled with a raw love that only a father could express. “Hey, little one,” he murmurs, his fingers rubbing slow circles against your skin, “can’t wait to see you, to hold you in my arms.” His eyes never leave your belly, his expression a mixture of awe and tenderness.
When he thinks you’re not looking, his lips brush against the top of your stomach, a soft kiss meant only for the baby. “I’ll protect you,” he says quietly, the words meant for both of you but carrying an unspoken promise to the child. “Daddy’s gonna make sure you’re safe, always.”
His hand stays there, lingering, as if he’s trying to convey everything he feels through the simple act of touching. Sometimes, he talks to the baby about what he hopes for their future—what he dreams they’ll be, but more often, it’s about how much he already loves them. How proud he is.
No matter where you are, he finds the time to remind you both of that, as if the baby can hear every word, every heartbeat, every promise. And each time he touches your belly, he’s not just caressing you—he’s speaking directly to the child, forming a bond that’s already so deep.
NewlyDad!Simon who had never been one for big gatherings or being the center of attention, but tonight, he was doing it—for you, and for the baby.
His teammates had insisted, as had your friends, that you both needed to get out. A little normalcy, they said. A dinner with the people who supported him through everything. But Simon? He was already on high alert the moment you stepped out the door. His hand was constantly on your back, gently guiding you, his eyes scanning the room, always aware of your every movement.
The restaurant was bustling, a little louder than usual, but Simon barely seemed to notice the chatter around him. His attention was split between you and the people he trusted—his team. His arm would sometimes drift to your waist, his fingers brushing against your bump, as if to reassure himself that everything was okay. He didn’t let you stray far, always within arm’s reach, his protective nature wrapped around you like a shield.
At the table, he was engaged, nodding along to conversations, but his focus was never fully on the group. When someone leaned in a little too close, his eyes would flicker to them, silently warning them to keep their distance. When Soap tried to crack a joke about fatherhood, Simon’s lips twitched upward in a brief smile, but the moment the laughter died down, his hand found its way to your stomach, his thumb brushing over it lightly.
He’d occasionally glance over at you, catching your eye, as if asking silently if you were okay, if you needed anything. He knew you could take care of yourself, but tonight? Tonight, he wasn’t letting his guard down for a second.
When dinner came, Simon was the first to help you with your plate, carefully cutting your food or offering you bites from his own. He made sure you were comfortable, always attentive, his eyes never straying too far from you. He wasn’t one to show weakness, but with you? And with the baby? His vulnerability showed in the way he constantly checked in, in the way he’d rather have his hand on your bump than anywhere else.
His teammates had known him as a man of few words, but tonight, they were learning a different side of Simon—one who would move mountains to keep his family safe and happy, even in a simple dinner setting. They could see it in the way he watched over you, in the little touches he gave you when he thought no one was looking. He may have been the strong, silent type to everyone else, but to you and the baby? He was all heart.
As the night wound down, Simon was already thinking about how soon he could get you home, make sure you were settled and safe. He never stopped being the protective husband, never stopped being the father-to-be, and he certainly never stopped being the man who would give up everything to keep you both safe.
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viktorarcanedeservesbetter · 6 months ago
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because I’m on a meljayvik kick rn
Viktor has to sleep in the middle of the bed bc both Mel and Jayce run hot. any combo where he is not in the center has whoever is on the end sweating profusely and the person in the middle has one cold side and one warm side. it’s science.
Mel is the coolest and calmest of their heads, yes, but she is most definitely in on their “yes, and?” dynamic to science and magic. She is all for the chaos, she just wants them to wear protective equipment while doing the chaos.
Jayce designed their shower to be double the size of a normal walk-in. Their tub is pretty much a hot tub. Do with this what you will.
Jayce carries both his partners on his shoulders. He also can do many a set of pushups with both of them on his back. They’ve played chess against each other on Jayce’s back, while also asking for advice on chess moves.
Jayce and Mel have a game called “do not leave Viktor alone with Ambessa”. For everyone’s sake, they have been 100% successful. Jayce gets jealous, and the last thing Mel wants her mom to know is that they do share a taste in types of men. Viktor is unaware of this game. Ambessa is curious of the twink her daughter is hiding from her.
Mel is the first person who gets to see all their prototypes in action. She has also been woken up in the middle of the night when one (usually both) have an idea. She is 100% behind this, though she didn’t appreciate the time Viktor and Jayce woke her up for what ended up being a literal lamp re-design. They spent an hour talking about their genius and innovative light, powered by hextech, just for her to flick their bedside lamp on.
Mel has never laughed so much in her life since meeting and getting with them. She attributes these years as the best ones so far. Jayce and Viktor feel the same.
Viktor is just. Always in meetings now. Chilling out. What are you gonna do? Tell the de facto-head of council Jayce he can’t bring in his partner and tell the richest and also most influential member Mel she can’t bring in her other Boyfriend? Good luck.
He actually does not want to be in these meetings. He's there for moral support and the promises of coffee. Also Mel needs him to occasionally hit Jayce's chair with his cane when the other man starts to fall asleep.
He also sneaks notes to her of drawings and she's been mad (not really) ever since he made her snort really loudly due to his caricature of hoskel and salo. It's framed in their office.
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tender-rosiey · 5 months ago
Note
req- jujutsu characters physically straining themselves and asking yn for help
take care:)
"I'M ONE CRAMP AWAY FROM A MELTDOWN"
— gojo, geto, nanami, sukuna, and toji physically straining themselves and asking for help
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GOJO SATORU:
satoru is sprawled on the floor, looking like he’s been hit by a truck, though you know he’s just playing it up.
his dramatic groans echo around the room, the kind that would make anyone believe he’s on the verge of death.
“wifeyyyy,” he groans, one arm flung dramatically over his eyes as he lays flat on his back. “I think I’m dying.”
you glance at him, deadpan. “from what, exactly?”
“from sheer exhaustion,” he replies, his voice dripping with mock despair. “it’s the worst kind of pain. the kind you can’t fight.”
you cross your arms, watching him for a moment. “really? because I’m pretty sure you’re exaggerating.”
“exaggerating?”
satoru lifts his hand weakly, like he’s reaching out for help. “I wish I were. But no, sweetheart, this is real. I’ve given everything to protect this world, and now—now I’m paying the price.”
you sigh, rolling your eyes, but you can’t help but feel a little amused by his theatrics.
still, there’s no denying that he’s probably worn out from the mission, even if he’s acting like a drama king about it.
“alright, alright,” you say, bending down next to him. “but if you’re truly in this much pain, maybe you should let me help you.”
his eyes flash with relief the moment you say that. he grabs your wrist, pulling you closer. “oh, you’re such a lifesaver, wifey. I knew I could count on you.”
you smirk, kneeling next to him. “I’m not sure how much I can help with your exaggerated suffering, but I’ll give it a shot.”
satoru immediately sits up, all too eager, his arm still draped over your shoulder as if he’s the one about to collapse at any second.
you guide him onto the couch, a little more forcefully than he probably expected. he lets out an exaggerated gasp of thanks, making a show of how much effort it took.
“now, my shoulders,” he says, voice full of mock desperation, “they’re absolutely killing me. no one has shoulders as heavy as mine.”
you raise an eyebrow but don’t argue. “I can’t believe I love you,” you mutter, sitting beside him and placing a hand on his shoulder.
you start massaging gently, fingers working through the tight muscles that are starting to give way beneath your touch.
satoru’s whole body seems to relax under your hands.
“mmm, that’s the stuff,” he sighs dramatically, his head tilting back as if you’ve just performed some kind of miracle. “you’re so good at this. how do you manage to be perfect in every way?”
you roll your eyes, but your hands keep working, pressing into the sore muscles along his shoulder blades.
his response is immediate—he melts further into the couch, eyes half-lidded as he hums with contentment.
“I think I’ve died and gone to heaven,” he mutters. “this is pure bliss, sweets. no one else could do this to me like you do.”
“yeah, yeah,” you say, giving him a kiss on his cheek that makes him melt yet again against the couch.
GETO SUGURU:
suguru stumbles into the living room, looking completely drained, his shoulders sagging as he lets out a soft groan.
he rubs his eyes before glancing at you. "I think I’ll just take a bath and call it a day."
you raise an eyebrow, already sensing his exhaustion. "you sure? I could help, you know."
suguru shakes his head, grinning weakly. "I’m fine. Really. I can manage."
a few moments later, suguru is in the warm bath, steam rising lazily from the water.
he leans back, letting his muscles relax as he sinks into the tub, his body visibly easing into the heat. you stand behind him, fingers gently working through his hair, lathering the shampoo into his scalp.
the soft scent of lavender fills the air, mixing with the quiet splashing of water as your hands move through his hair.
suguru sighs, his body melting into the heat. "I am a weak man," he mutters.
you let out a small laugh, fingers moving in slow, soothing circles. his muscles are finally unwinding, and you can feel the weight of his day leaving him, bit by bit.
"yeah?" you tease softly, grinning. "but, you know, I think I’m pretty good at this, huh?"
he chuckles lazily, his voice low and relaxed. "you’re amazing," he admits, his tone affectionate. "I’m lucky to have you around."
you glance at him, still working through his hair, and playfully raise an eyebrow. "how about you? how was your day?"
suguru lets out a small sigh, clearly unwinding further at the sound of your voice.
“long. you know how it is. a million things to do and never enough time for it." he grins a little. "but it’s always better when I’m with you."
you shake your head, laughing softly. "you’re lucky I’ve got the patience to deal with you."
suguru raises a hand, giving a lazy wave. "You’re doing more than that. I’m starting to think you could make a career out of this."
you smirk, rubbing the shampoo deeper into his hair. "please, I have better things to do than take care of you all the time."
suguru cracks an eye open, a playful glint shining through. he reaches out, grabbing your wrist gently. "I don’t know about that. this is pretty nice."
you shrug casually, your smile warm. "someone’s got to look after you."
the bath continues in peaceful silence for a while, only the sounds of water splashing softly around you.
suguru’s body relaxes further, his tense muscles finally letting go. he sinks deeper into the tub, eyes closed again, a contented smile on his lips.
"thanks," he says quietly.
you continue washing his hair, the smile on your face softening. "anytime, silly.”
suguru chuckles softly, "you know, you’re kind of perfect."
you roll your eyes, but your fingers never stop working through his hair. "you’re delirious, suguru. stop with the nonsense."
suguru gives a lazy smile, his eyes still closed. "no, I mean it. you’re beautiful, and I’m lucky you married me, my beautiful, pretty, kind—"
before he can say anything else, you splash him with water. "okay, okay! enough with the sappy stuff!"
NANAMI KENTO:
the sound of a low, frustrated sigh greets you as you walk into the living room.
you spot kento sitting on the floor, his back straight against the couch, head tilted slightly as though trying to work out a knot in his neck.
his usual composed expression is marred with a faint furrow of irritation.
“kento?” you call, stepping closer. “why are you sitting on the floor like someone left you there?”
“it’s nothing,” he replies too quickly, brushing off the question. but the way his hand instinctively moves to rub the back of his neck betrays him. “just…tired.”
you raise an eyebrow, crossing your arms. “tired? or is this about your neck? because you’ve been hunched over paperwork for hours, haven’t you?”
kento doesn’t answer right away, but his silence is telling.
he sighs and tilts his head back to meet your gaze, looking more like the overworked salaryman he used to be before he rejoined jujutsu tech.
“It’s just a bit stiff. I’ll manage.”
“oh, you’ll manage,” you echo, crouching down in front of him. “right up until you can’t turn your head tomorrow. then what?”
he narrows his eyes slightly, as if to say I’m not that fragile, but you cut him off before he can protest.
“kento,” you say firmly, softening your tone, “you’re literally built like a tank, but even tanks need maintenance. let me help.”
“I don’t want to bother you,” he mutters, his voice quiet but sincere. “you’ve had a long day too.”
“and yet I have plenty of energy to take care of my husband,” you reply, smirking. “now come on, just humor me.”
kento hesitates for a moment. eventually, he relents with a soft sigh. “fine.”
you shift to kneel behind him, your fingers already reaching for the tense muscles in his neck and shoulders.
“lean forward a bit,” you instruct, and when he does, you gently press your thumbs into the tight spots, working in slow, deliberate circles.
kento lets out a low, contented hum that sends warmth flooding through your chest.
“see?” you tease, leaning closer to press a quick kiss to the top of his head. “not so bad, right?”
“it’s…enjoyable,” he says, though his voice carries a faint warmth that tells you he’s enjoying this far more than he’s letting on.
you chuckle, your hands moving to his shoulders. “you know, I’d say you owe me for this, but I think this is my repayment.”
“repayment for what?”
“for saving you,” you quip, grinning. “because if you’d stayed like that any longer, you’d have turned into a statue.”
kento exhales a quiet laugh, his head tilting slightly as your fingers find another sore spot. “you’re relentless.”
“only because I love you,” you reply with a wink, leaning forward to press your cheek against his for a moment.
he reaches up, catching one of your hands and pressing a kiss to your knuckles. “and I love you too.”
RYOMEN SUKUNA:
sukuna’s broad frame fills the doorway as he strides into the room, his bloodstained robes trailing behind him.
you glance up from your seat, unimpressed by the spectacle. it’s the usual aftermath of his “excursions.”
he’s all sharp angles and arrogance, but there’s a stiffness in his movements that you don’t miss.
“back already?” you ask, arching a brow as you sip your tea.
he scoffs, waving a dismissive hand. “they were weaklings. barely worth my time.”
yet, as he lowers himself onto a cushion with a low grunt, his shoulders twitch ever so slightly. he rolls one, then the other, his jaw tightening just enough for you to catch it.
“something wrong?” you ask, your tone feigning innocence, though your sharp gaze betrays your amusement.
“watch yourself,” he warns, crimson eyes narrowing. “you forget who you’re speaking to.”
“hard to forget when you insist on reminding me every other breath,” you reply dryly, setting your cup down and standing.
“but I’m also observant enough to know when you’re too proud to admit you’re in pain.”
“I’m not in pain,” he snaps, though the way his hand instinctively moves to his neck betrays him.
“of course not,” you agree, stepping closer with a smug tilt of your head. “the great sukuna couldn’t possibly be sore after annihilating half the countryside.”
he glares at you, his pride clearly battling the ache in his shoulders. “you’re playing with fire, woman.”
“and yet you haven’t burned me yet,” you counter with a sly smile. “turn around.”
he doesn’t move, his jaw tightening as if to challenge you. but when you cross your arms and stare him down with an unimpressed look, he huffs and turns his back to you.
“stubborn,” you mutter under your breath, stepping behind him. his shoulders are massive, the tension in them practically radiating.
you place your hands on them, and he immediately stiffens.
“relax,” you say, kneading the taut muscles beneath your fingers. “I’m not trying to kill you.”
“pity,” he mutters, though there’s a begrudging amusement in his tone.
you press your thumbs into a particularly tight knot, and he lets out a low, involuntary sound—not quite a groan but enough to make you smirk.
“see? even you can’t argue with results,” you tease, leaning closer as your hands work into his shoulders.
“you’re enjoying this too much,” he grumbles, though he doesn’t pull away. if anything, he leans into your touch, his body betraying him.
for a while, the room is quiet, save for the occasional crackle of the hearth and the sound of your hands working against his muscles.
you press a little harder into a stubborn knot, and he exhales sharply.
“still acting tough?” you ask, your voice softer now.
“I am tough, you insolent wife,” he retorts, but the edge in his voice has dulled.
you chuckle, brushing a stray lock of his hair aside with one hand while the other presses into his neck. the gesture is so tender, enough that sukuna goes still for a moment.
“your hair’s a mess,” you murmur, your fingers trailing briefly over the side of his face before pulling back.
he turns his head slightly, his crimson gaze meeting yours over his shoulder.
you notice the slight softening of his eyes before he scoffs, rolling his shoulders as you step back little. “you’re getting too comfortable.”
“how scandalous,” you hum, leaning in and pressing a kiss to his cheek.
he frowns, hand moving to hold the back of your head as he pulls you closer.
FUSHIGURO TOJI:
toji stumbles through the bedroom door, a look of mild exhaustion on his face. his shirt’s torn at the sleeve, a fresh scrape on his cheek, and he’s limping just slightly, though he's trying to hide it. you glance up from your book, raising an eyebrow.
“you’re a mess,” you say, putting your book down.
he groans. “I’m fine. Just got into a little scuffle with a couple of idiots.” he shrugs off his jacket and tosses it carelessly onto the chair, wincing slightly as he pulls it off.
you tilt your head, inspecting him carefully. “uh-huh. that’s the same thing you always say. you’re looking a little too beat up to be fine.”
toji snorts. “it’s nothing. just a bruise here, scratch there—don’t make a big deal out of it.”
you raise your hands in mock surrender, but your eyes narrow playfully. “uh-huh. right. and I suppose your limp is just for fun too?”
toji looks down at his leg, then back at you, clearly trying to avoid the topic. “I’m fine, alright? really. you don’t need to play nurse tonight.”
you get up from the couch, walking over to him with a slight smirk. “I’m not playing nurse, toji. but if you’re going to act like a stubborn idiot, I guess I’ll have to do something about it.” you poke at his shoulder lightly, knowing full well he hates being fussed over.
he lets out a low, tired chuckle. “yeah, yeah. I know. you’ve got a thing for fixing me up.”
you roll your eyes, tugging at his shirt and guiding him toward the couch. “I’m not fixing you up. I’m just stopping you from walking around like a zombie for the rest of the night.”
he lets out an exaggerated groan, but he sinks down onto the couch anyway. “you’re lucky you’re cute. go ahead, doctor.”
you sit beside him and start gently untying his shoes. “you always say that when you’re trying to avoid admitting you need help.”
toji lifts an eyebrow, looking amused. “I don’t need help. I just like your hands on me.” he smirks.
you shake your head, unbothered. “just sit still for a second, alright?”
he chuckles as you work, peeling off his shoes and massaging the tension out of his feet. you can feel the stress in his muscles, the fatigue from the day’s battle lingering.
“see?” you poke at his calf with your finger. “this is what happens when you refuse to listen. you get all tense and grumpy.”
toji groans, but it’s not from pain. he stretches his leg out further, enjoying the relief. “you know, this doesn’t feel too bad…”
“you’re welcome,” you tease, your hands moving up his legs, working on his calves. “maybe next time you won’t play the ‘I’m fine’ card when you’re clearly not.”
he grins and looks down at you, his eyes softening just a bit. “I’ll think about it, but no promises. you know how I am.”
you laugh quietly, continuing your work. “yeah, I do. stubborn to a fault.” you finish with his feet, giving them a final rub before standing up. “alright, mister, I’m done here. go rest up before I have to start giving you more ‘doctor visits.’”
“I didn’t know you were into roleplay—”
“one more word, and you will be kissing the couch tonight.”
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copyright © tender-rosiey
do not copy or plagiarize or I will make my cat bite you
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keen-li · 6 months ago
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Merry!Ex-mas.
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18+ MDNI
22.k words synopsis: you get a notification about plane tickets you purchased about a trip you were excited for, only reason you're not excited at the remainder, is because you had planned the trip with your now ex. At the time you never thought you'd be spending December broken up. So, it felt like a great idea. not so much now. ex!jk x ex!femreader (fem anatomy.) exes to lovers use of 'yn' warnings: angst, fluff, smut: long-distance relationship, exes, second chance, miscommunication, b*tches is awkward, tension, one bed, forced proximity, Jungkook isn't crazy rich but he's got good money, i think he's an accountant, jk has that short ceo hair cut. reader has communication problem, jungkook's freaking green sweater needs it's own fanfic!, think are!you!sure jungkook. protective!jk, there's a creep who approaches reader as jungkook is off skiing, and whilst she's in the sauna(nothing bad happens.), sweet!wants!to!try!jk, jk has issues of not communicating too. they just can't seem to talk. avoiding stuff. teasing. touchy!jk, secret glances. jealousy, reader is very jealous,they're lying to themsleves, jungkook loves to take pictures especially of reader. hot tub jungkook who's looking up at you like you're a goddes. very needy kissing, boob sucking, dirty talking, oral(f!receiving.), handjob, cowgirl, protected!penetration, aftercare. hand kissing. [i don't know what else i need to add, let me know] as per usual, it was edited but if there are any errors, forgive me. A/N: this fic is honestly cause of that Jungkook green sweater I've never travelled to please don't come at me if anything is wrong. I very much world built some things. I've given written from top to bottom so don't except a part 2, unless maybe drabble requests. I wrote this in one week and i'm so proud i was able to write 22k words, in that time. though i was supposed to go up on the 25th[shhhhhh] A/N: i'm still learning how to write smut. so if you think the smut is cringe please don't tell me :) i don't wanna know. unless you want to help me improve it, and you do it kindly, i'd appreciate. likes, reblog, and all positive asks and comments are always appreciated. i hope you're happy with this one. [read under the cut]
You get the notification as you're scrolling through your phone. A remainder of sorts that you had been forgetting something. Cause you had been.
It loomed over you all week. The lingering feeling of remembering what you can’t. You hated it. But now that you know it’s source you couldn’t feel any worse.
Being the recipient of the message, you’re burdened with having to translate the message. Why do you have to do this? Broken up, having to text him feels like opening a can of worms. But the tickets are non-refundable, and it would be unfair for you to not inform him. You did both pay for them, Jungkook of course paying more because he was just too stubborn to split. he'd actually wanted to pay for the full thing but you were at odds with the idea. he settled eventually.
So, it would be unfair to not tell him. Right? Yes. But you don’t want to believe it.
Even if how the hell are you going to remind your ex about the holiday trip you planned thinking you’d be together for; but in turn would celebrate separately. Before the notification of the trip.
To add on, now you have to open your chat. An action you dread to do; for your emotional health.
What are you actually going to say? You think, finger hovering over the keyboard. Something that won’t make you sound like you’ve missed him, were thinking about him or even thinking about going on this trip with him. All which you’ve been doing. You’ve succumb to the thoughts, only because you two broke up in October, still relatively early to just forget a 3-year relationship with someone you thought you’d marry.
Sigh.
You still haven’t answered the question of how you’re even gonna bring it up. Will he even answer?
“shibal” jimin laughs into the speaker, not helping you one bit. “you two are ridiculous.”
You roll your eyes still waiting and hoping he’ll say something sensible. It’s all in vain. “How the hell do you book a trip and break up just before. You couldn’t wait?” He laughs and you just know he’s sat at his computer playing games, from his loud and unfocused speech.
“We didn’t freaking know we’d breakup.” You justify. “Plus, cause of the breakup we forgot. I forgot.” Your voice loses its strength at the end of the sentence, your mind slipping into a deep thought.
You haven’t been able to remember anything of relevance since that day. Maybe only how to breath and live but you’d say your body takes full credit for that.
“Hmm.” is all he says to you before screaming obscenities to someone in his game.
“Jimin are you gonna be of any help or wh-”
“You know what you should do?”
You want to believe his following statement will be of use, but you can never be certain.
“Just send it” he groans from what you assume is an attack on him. Your brow raises. “Send him a screenshot of the notification. If he doesn’t respond go on it on your own.”
“Or take me with you” he whispers. If it came to it, would you even choose jimin to go with? Probably. He’d help make it fun.
You sigh, still in the darkest of analysis. It’s your best option what else could you say. So, you say your goodbye to jimin who is quick to go off to his game, without a second thought. Rude. Talking to him whilst he’s on his game is setting yourself up.
Back to having a staring contest with your phone. And after a long while of panic, thump fidgeting and dry eyes, you click on his contact (yes you still have it.) and just send the screenshot.
As you wait to make sure the picture is sent you catch a glimpse of the last text from your chat. You were avoiding slipping up and seeing it, but your eyes couldn’t be helped.
Jungkook was the last to text.
Kookie<3: I miss you call me back.
Seeing the text makes your stomach churn. Makes your head spin with all the memories and emotions returning. You don’t want to linger on it. You’re quick to just sending the screenshot like jimin said, you only hope he doesn’t ask too many questions. If he does respond. The little thought in your head surfaces. What if he wants nothing to do with you. What if you’re bothering him? You shouldn’t have sent that text. But it’s too late now.
You’re well aware his message was sent before you had broken up. The only reason you hadn’t replied was because you couldn’t. On the same day you’d called him back and told him how you didn’t think you’d be able to do it anymore.
“Mm?” he hums confused. You can hear it in his voice and it only makes you even more nervous to repeat.
“This long-distance thing isn’t working for us jungkook.” You bite you lower lip hoping to hide some of your emotions that threaten to ruin your speech. Your fingers fidget in the silence waiting for his response. But it never comes and for a moment you think he’s cut the call and you’ve been talking to yourself. That’s when he sighs, showing you, he’s been listening but too shocked to speak.
You calling his full name, no nickname, strains at his heart. “Are you serious?” it’s calm, sad even. Of course he’s sad, you’re breaking up with him. Sad isn’t even strong enough to describe what he’s feeling. Shock is just amongst them, maybe even a little anger. You’ve been going through a challenging period because of the difference in cities. But he never thought it’d come to this. Was it that bad?
“Yeah.” It’s weak defeated. You are, your whole relationship is.
Jungkook is awfully silent, he’s not sure why either. “Is there anything I can do?” he’s aware of the only solution available. But it’s not possible. Neither of your work will allow the other to move.
You shake your head like he can see it. but he doesn’t need to see what your silence has already said.
After not much thought cause he’s not able to, he speaks. “Is this what you want?” his question only serves to add to your confusion.
“You know it’s not but- “you try to speak but the lump in your throat chokes you.
It hurts him that this is happening over a call. Wishes he could’ve spoken about it in person, cause there’s more to it.
More that you haven’t spoken about. Never have, and doubt you ever will or want to.
All this just makes the idea of this trip even more worrying. That’s if he’ll want to go or even respond. You never got to know what he thought but you assume he has some sort of resentment for the way you ended things. You would too. That’s one of the things you feel guilty for.
You’ll say the way things ended was not ideal, and honestly it never made you feel good as you thought it would. It made you feel worse actually. But at least now you don’t argue because you don’t talk. Who are you kidding, you miss the arguments, something to remind he was there.
Guilt hovers but, you console yourself by saying that he probably wanted it too if he didn’t try to fight for it. Which is unfair, but what else can you tell yourself as an excuse.
Your focus is now on your screen. You’re about to exit the chat, but then those familiar popups of bubbles appear. Already?
The bubbles disappear and appear, which only serves to grow your anxiety. Is he about to rebuke you for texting him. Gosh, what the hell would you say after that? He’s about to cuss you out. Suddenly your room feels too small to hold you and what you’re feeling.
But what pops up is even more anxiety inducing.
Kookie<3: I’m in town. We should meet and talk tomorrow.
Why does he sound so professional? Why do you care. Oh- your mind, it’s spinning.
He’s in town, when? Why didn’t he tell you. This would be the first time you see him in a year since he moved. And he couldn’t even just tell you he was in town. The reason to him being here is not unknown to you. It’s the Christmas season and his parents do live in the same city as you. And just like you they were not happy about they’re son moving so far away. But nothing was stopping jungkook. Nothing.
You’re probably not important to him anymore but, couldn’t he have just said, hi. I’m in town. How long has he even been here for? You never thought he’d return to the city even for the holidays.
You shake the thoughts out of your head. You can’t be over thinking this.
We?......meet?.....talk?.....TOMORROW!              
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Tomorrow couldn’t come any faster (not that you were excited for it.). It’s almost as though it wants you and jungkook to meet.
You both agreed to meet at one of the small restaurants near your place. One you two frequented together, so it holds so much for you. Which only made you more anxious on your way.
When you walked in your eyes unconsciously moved to the table you and jungkook loved to seat at. It was good distance from the kitchen so your food could reach you quicker, and far from others so that jungkook could lean in and say the nastiest thing on earth. It always made you blush even though you’d swat at him. You spot jungkook sat where he usually sat. Coat taken off and hanged on his chair.
 “Hey.” You choke out smiling politely as you reach the table and take off your coat, the inside of the restaurant too warm to be comfortable with it on.
You take a sit and allow your body to get accustomed to the environment. And jungkook.
He’s quick to respond to your greeting just as awkward.
When you’re settled you finally get a chance to see just how much he’s changed in a year. The warm light from the ceiling softens his features which would normally be sharp in the dim lights of your bedroom. His hair is cut short. Last time you saw him it was neck length, but now it’s significantly short. Makes him look professional, mature. You like it, really like it. you wish you could just reach over and touch it, it’d probably be just as soft as you remember it and smell like lavender. You notice how he has it styled and gelled back so you doubt he’d be happy with you running your hands in it.
Jungkook spent an ungodly amount of time trying to get it to look like this, which he doesn’t think is perfect enough, but he was running out of time. Something about this meeting had him wanting to go out. He just hopes you like it. he remembers you last saw it when it was longer. It was a big cut, but after your breakup, he felt like giving up the length, considering your hands loved to live in his hair.
You sit hand in lap waiting for your mouth to catch up with how fast your brain is working. Though if you did speak what your brain was thinking, you’d embarrass yourself.
“We should order first.” He says rolling up the sleeves of his navy-blue denim shirt. The action reminding of the inks on his arm. A detail that adds to how attractive he is already. You’re really hating yourself for your thoughts. In your defence you haven’t seen him in the flesh for a year. “What do you wanna get?” he picks up his menu and you do too, stuttering in your movement. He seems calmer than you right now.
But the only thing is that he’s shitting himself inside. when he was sat before you came, his heart dropped every time he heard the door bells chime. Every time he turned it wasn’t you. Only increasing his nervousness. Maybe he was a little to forward with his message. You haven’t seen each other in a while and it’d probably be overwhelming, especially with a certain elephant in the room. He would’ve definitely understood if you didn’t want to show. On the chime of the door that followed his thoughts, he didn’t turn, only for it to be you. In your full glory, making him fidget with his phone more. Which he put aside immediately you sat down.
Clearing your throat you speak, “something soup-y. Today’s a little cold.” And you don’t feel like throwing up what you eat.
Jungkook agrees and his red nose is evidence of that. Cute, you think.
After your orders are taken you turn back to silence. What could you probably say right now? You can feel the distance between you emotionally. And you hate how this is how you are after not seeing each other for a year. Before breaking up you thought of the many ways, you’d hug him once you got to see him. You were definitely delusional over how serious your distance was. Really wanting to believe it wouldn’t be a problem; until it became one, and you just couldn’t do it anymore.
You don’t know how to behave right now.
“So, when did you get back?” you settle on a soft and casual tone.
“Just yesterday.” He speaks sounding a little hesitant. After not knowing where to look you decide to just look at one thing. The table.
After beats of silence, you continue. Can your food come any faster? “you’re staying with your parents?”
“Yeah.”
You lived together, in your used to be shared apartment before he decided to move. So, his only option was to live with his parents for the mean time. He assumed you wouldn’t want or even let him live with you. And it would be fair, you aren’t together anymore.
“I’m Sure they were shocked to see how much you’ve change.” Cause you are. You haven’t seen his parents in the same time that he hasn’t seen them.
“It was a surprise drop in so I’m sure they were” he says with weak chuckle. He bites into his lip before he’s looking at you again, but you don’t stare at him. It’s only when you realize his stare that you finally face him. “How have you been? You look well.” He’s dreading himself right now for not being able to speak to someone who has been, for 3 years, the only person he could speak to.
You do look good, and he can’t take his mind off it. the camera has not been doing you justice. Your skin looks brighter and you generally are just glowing. Gosh he missed looking at you. The way small dainty jewellery serves to compliment your outfit. Your hair done in a way you like, and he loves.
“I try.” You smile. Every chance you get you take a glace at his lip piercing. You’d forgotten just how it made him even the more--. “You look well too. How’s the job going?”
He sucks in a breath, showing visible stress at the thought of his job. “it’s going okay. Easiest way to put it.” he chuckles, awkwardly. You smile, awkwardly too. “I missed it here though, so much stuff I left behind.”
You just hum, nodding. Avoiding how his eyes glancing over you, just for a second as he was looking for where to keep his gaze whilst speaking.
“But I’m sure you’re having fun that side.” That side. He can hear the strength you put on the words. Instead of fiddling on your lap you decide to fold your arms on your chest. Finding it appropriate for the feelings that are sneaking in.
“You can say that, but there’s just something that feels empty y’know.” You do know, but you both choose to leave the conversation implicit.
And right on time, your food arrives saving you from saying anything. What the heck would you say when you can’t even think.
You two are soon digging into your food. Jungkook in his kimchi jjigae and you in yours.
“I missed this- mmm.” He hums making that little angry face he makes when he likes food. You laugh, a little to loud at that causing him to look up at you. You drop your smile.
“Mrs Kim always asks me about you when I come here.” 6 slices of chopped spring onion garnish you haven’t eaten, yet.
He leans back in his chair, unintentionally watching you eat.
He turns his head towards the kitchen where the lady in question usually spends her time. “Where is she anyways?” he’s back to digging into his food. the steam from the food warming his cold nose.
“she’s visiting sung Hoon in the US.” You inform him, taking in how relaxed you’ve become.
He nods at the info, “Ahh- she finally got to got to the US?” he smiles. He remembers how she would come to the table; she’d complain that her son doesn’t want her to visit, which was not the case. But being the dramatic lady she is, she would think that. “ ’m sure she was so excited.”
“no one could hear the end of it.”
He chuckles and you find yourself laughing too. But as much as you’re seemingly getting comfortable (though not wholly.) silence finds a way to wrap it’s long, cold and slimy finger around you two.
After you’re done eating your meals in silence, jungkook thinks it’s time to discuss the reason you’re even meeting. Cause you have nothing more to talk about.
“what’s the plan for the trip?” he shifts in his seat. “Assuming you’d want to go.” He doubts.
You take a deep breath before speaking, looking over at the whole scene of the restaurant. “I don’t know, we’d leave on Thursday. Assuming you’d want to go too.” You would want to go, that’s why you booked the trip. It’s only your situation that makes it awkward.
“Do you?” his question comes out fast and sudden and he regrets how quick it came out.
“Mm?” you mutter like you couldn’t hear what he said.
He clarifies choosing to speak more calmly and composed. “Do you want to go?”
The question takes you aback as though you hadn’t been asking yourself the same thing.
Reaching to play with the little gem on your necklace you stutter out. “I-I mean- yeah we spent money on it.” you shrug your shoulders as if you’re unconsciously saying otherwise, but really, you’re just trying to keep your statement open. In case he doesn’t want to go, and you’re left embarrassed with an extra ticket.
Jungkook instead takes your action as you probably not wanting to go. “I get it if you don’t. It’s a weird situation.” His hands move to touching his hair.
You trying to jump in but end up speaking a little too fast. “No, I do. Plus, I hate wasting money.” You do hate wasting money, truly. And it is just that and the fact that you would love a trip right now, to de-stress.
“But do you want to go with me?” that churning feeling in your stomach is returning, and you’ve just eaten which makes it all the much better.
Biting down on your lip and releasing it you say, “I mean I wouldn’t want to go on my own.” You hate how you feel your throat choking up. “Who else would I go with?” you awkwardly joke. There are some people you’d go with. But you planned this trip with jungkook and he paid the much for the tickets. So, it’s only fair to go with him. If he wants to.
He skips your question, not in bad taste. it’d be weird for you to go on a trip you planned with him with someone else. Maybe he did think of it, that maybe you’d enjoy it more if you weren’t with him. But then he thought it through. Shit doesn’t have to be awkward unless you both make it. so, you can enjoy this trip if you just agree to enjoy it. “I don’t mind going with you, but I don’t want you to feel forced to have me there.”
“I have no problem with you, jungkook.” You saying his name even though it’s not the pet name he enjoys feels like a warm touch to him. “I just want to know if you wanna go.” You find it in you to ask.
“I don’t mind it at all.” He says, relieving you of your fears.
He sighs. After he silence speaks. “I can’t believe I forgot about it. I was so excited for it too.” he reminiscing on the day. It was such a good idea. Is a good idea, if you just agree to enjoy it.
“So? It’s settled right?“ You sit up grabbing your stuff and preparing to leave. Jungkook’s smile falls realizing that the moment is ending. But he will see you soon still.
“Yeah.” He prepares to leave too.
“We leave Thursday, I guess. We’ll stay in touch.”
And that’s it, your conversation ends with you managing to avoid the larger topic at hand. It’s like a game.
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You throw your clothes in haphazardly. You’re in a panic, which is not necessary cause you have enough time, the whole day to be precise. Your flight’s tomorrow. But the whole airport thing has always found a way to make you panic.
You grab some essentials, but in frustration. Maybe you just want to get it over with. The packing, not the trip. Honestly it feels like it’s already started. Is this how you’re going to be.
As you search through your closet you land on a sweater, one you remember too well. It’s green colour and fluffy soft texture makes it the warmest thing you own. A very memorable sweater, for the warmth it brought you and its origin. You can still smell him on it. You dread packing it and resort to shoving it further in your closet. You’ll think about it.
You stare at your zipped up suitcase for a bit before your eyes gloss over to your phone that buzzes on your bed. For a split second you wonder if it’s jungkook. Could he have changed his mind. you sigh relived when you see it’s just jimin.
Who chooses to say nothing of value and just tease you. “Honestly why do I tell him these things.” You throw your phone on your bed.
Jungkook stands over his already packed suitcase. He just has to zip it closed and seal this trip. He sighs rubbing his lower lip. Before you two broke up he had so much planned for this trip. So much he wanted to say and do. But it's different now and it’d be weird and wrong to say those things. Not before talking of course.
Is he looking forward to this trip? Yes-wait- maybe. The trip in itself is fine, a great and good idea and opportunity to enjoy a holiday and relax. But your presence entails something more something he has to deal with (in a responsible and good way) and that he's been running away from.
 "You're excited huh?" his mother smiles leaning against his door frame, watching. He's not sure what about his facial expression, body language or general demeanour would make her think that he's excited. It’s not like he’s dreading or regretting it. it’s more like excitement is the last thing he’s feeling cause of all he’s thinking of.
He doesn't say anything before she's speaking again.
"You need this trip. you've been so busy." He has. Too much at that. So much that he forgot you two had even broken up and was about to go to your place first when he arrived. He’d been so excited to surprise you, then it dawned on him. His tires were quick to turning. His thoughts are cut short by his mother. "it'll help you spend more time with yn."
"I guess." he replies unenthusiastically. Though it’s the same idea they’re both thinking of it in a different context. Something that his mother doesn’t know yet.
He doesn't stare at where she stands only at his suitcase analysing what he's packed and what the heck is actually going on. "Plus, it would be a perfect place to propose." She enthuses, joyous at the thought. He seems to have slightly forgotten about that detail too.
 When you were planning the trip, he made a plan to propose to you on it. It honestly is the perfect place to and he felt like it was the right time. Of course, you'd be arguing but it wasn't something that was holding back your relationship. Plus, he thought you'd talked it out well enough. So, he spent his free time after planning the trip, shopping for rings and looking proposal ideas and even asked some of his colleagues for advice. It’d be a trip where you got to spend some time after being away for so long.
But that's when you called and honestly kicked him in the balls. Too confused he just went along with it.
"Switzerland is such a good choice, you kids are so good at these things." She says probably imaging herself there too.  It’s not long before his eyes are staring at the black velvet box on his dressing table, and his head is spinning all over again. He knows how excited she gets about this and she won’t stop. “You could take a walk and then pull out the Ring with those mountains in the back and-"
"Eomma!" His deep voice stops her, not harshly but whiny. Not telling his parents about the breakup is honestly the most overwhelming thing because of how his mother adores you and finds a way to bring you up in every conversation. she could go on but the tired look on her son's face makes her stop. She wants to pry on why he looks more drained that ecstatic but she chooses against it.
”Is something wrong?”
He realizes just how carried away he’s getting with his emotions. He shakes his head. “no. I’m just stressed.” He finally looks up at her to give a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes but she returns.
"Sorry, you know how I get carried away. I'm sure you have your own plan let me not stress you."
She leaves and he sighs
No. He has no plan of his own. He has no plan at all.
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Your suitcase handle is firmly clutched into your hand as you walk into the airport.
Your eyes scan the crowd. Every face. Each bag too, because you know which one he'd probably be carrying with him. Seeing it again is gonna be triggering cause the last time you saw it was the last time you saw him off.
You and jungkook agreed to come separately and since his parents lived closer to the airport he'd be here first and wait for you by security. But now that you're there you can't see him. Maybe he's a little late but why wouldn't he tell you.
You told him you had just arrived but he hasn't even seen that message. Has he changed his mind? is the first thing that pops up in your head. If he has that's a shitty way to do it. Just ghost you?
So, you pull out your phone to call him. “Pick up." You mutter under your breath.
No answer.
You feel stupid. It honestly feels like you're on a Lifetime show or even worse TLC.
Your annoyance bubbles over as you glance around the busy security area. "Where is he?" you ask yourself.
 Though you think he has, you doubt jungkook would just ghost you. It's not what you know him to be. You tap your foot impatiently and try to call him again. Still nothing. Your heart finally relaxes when you spot him already walking to you. "Seriously?" You say a little upset when he finally reaches. "Why didn't you answer your phone?"
"Oh. I didn't hear it." He says pulling it out of his pocket. "Must be on silent. I’m sorry." He looks at you genuinely so. And you can’t bring yourself to be as mad as you want to be. It’s not a big deal, he’s here now.
“it’s okay, we should get going, we’re almost late.” You say frustrated with how traffic delayed your arrival. Jungkook just hums agreeing and surprising you by taking you suitcase. You’d tell him it’s fine and you can manage but he’s already walking ahead of you. Probably not wanting to hear it.
A tense silence stretches between you two as you wait to board your plane. Sitting side by side has never felt so awkward, like the space between you is miles wide. You scroll through your phone, pretending to be so into it. You don’t notice Jungkook stealing occasional glances at you. Or rather, at the sweater you’re wearing—the one he gave you (more like you took.) just before he moved to another town. The green complimenting your skin. He loves how it just melts to fit you. He’s glad to know that you’re warm, he’s aware of how incredibly warm it is.
He wonders if you’re wearing it deliberately, or if it’s just because it’s the warmest thing you own, and today’s even colder than yesterday. Probably no meaning behind it. At least, that’s what he tells himself. Though it’s not enough to stop him from developing a smile on his face, one he covers with his hand.
The low hum of voices and the faint crackle of the airport announcements fill the silence. Someone walks past, dragging a squeaky suitcase, the airport noises the only thing between the two of you.
“I know this is awkward.” He starts randomly, at first doubting he was talking to you but then you move your attention to him, when you realize it’s only you he can be talking to. It’s not like you were looking at anything on your phone. “I want us to enjoy it. I want you to enjoy it.”
“I want you to enjoy it too.” You find yourself speaking before your brain can process.
He smiles and turns to meet your eyes. All of a sudden, he feels so close. “So can we just pretend.” His eyes don’t move, if possible, they stare even deeper into yours. Yours don’t move as well. “Pretend like everything’s okay.” He speaks low as if he doesn’t want others around to hear. “Agree?”
You haven’t said much, instead just let him speak. “Agreed.”
You don’t mind pretending. You’ve been pretending you’re okay all this time, so why can’t you do it now.
-
You watch Jungkook sliding the bags into the overhead storage above your seats. He notices you approaching and nods for you to have the window seat.
“You sure?” you ask only because he called dibs when you planned the trip that he’d be getting the window seat.
He nods. “Yeah. I know you like it more than I do.” You do. He only called dibs because he was trying to ‘one up’ you like everything’s a game.
You squeeze passed him get comfortable in your seat and he’s soon sitting next to you. You’re glad it’s just two seats.
You sit in silence for most of the flight, each pretending to be too absorbed in your own activities to notice the other. Jungkook watches you out of the corner of his eye as you scroll through your phone, then switch to reading a book. This trip can’t be that bad, you tell yourself. Of course, you two haven’t talked about your breakup, but it doesn’t have to come up. You’ll just enjoy the weekend and go back to normal, like he said—pretend---if either of you even knows what that means.
What are the boundaries of pretending.
At some point, you shift in your seat, leaning against him, your head resting on his shoulder. You’re asleep, of course, but Jungkook glances down at you, momentarily startled. He considers waking you but decides against it. Instead, he leans back slightly, letting you stay there.
As the plane hums softly and moves through the sky, Jungkook can’t help but wonder if this trip could be his chance to fix things. How does he want it to happen? Does he even know? All he knows it that you do eventually have to talk about things. Do you even want to talk about it, because you seem to be avoiding it.
But there’s only so much avoiding you can do.
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As soon as the plane lands, you stretch in your seat, surprised you managed to sleep for that long. Glancing at Jungkook, you watch as he pulls the luggage from the overhead bin. He looks like he didn’t get any sleep at all, you had been sleeping on his shoulder for most of the time. You exchange a brief look—just acknowledging each other and your present moment—before heading off the plane
The crisp Swiss air hits you as you step outside the terminal, and you follow Jungkook as he gets into a cab and it drives confidently toward a car rental area, which you’re confused about but don’t ask. Jungkook picks up keys from the reception and you walk through the parkin lot looking for what you don’t know. You’re just following. You stare at him puzzled as he dangles the keys. He’s been quiet, and you hadn’t even expected to rent a car. Public transport seemed like the plan, but now that you think about it, you remember how Jungkook feels about it.
“You rented a car?” you raise a brow.
He nods, “yeah, it’d be easier. Thought you’d approve.”
He catches a glance of your face, like you’re trying to figure something out, but can’t.
“Hmm.” You only hum.
“You look cute when you’re confused”.  He takes you by surprise. “Come on.” He says walking and not letting you process his words. You just try to shake them out of your head.
You don’t admit it, but you're impressed. He thought ahead. And you’re honestly glad he did—something you feel he’s been lacking the past year.
Once he’s done packing the luggage into the car, he closes the trunk and slides into the driver’s seat. You’re not sure why you’re shocked to find out it’s a Mercedes-benz g63 amg. You’d always known he had an obsession with luxury cars, especially ones like this. The fact that his job pays so well certainly helps, you guess moving out of town must’ve been worth it.
The car is great-- so comfortable, and the heater works perfectly, keeping you warm against the cold.
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As Jungkook adjusts the mirrors, you scroll through your contacts, trying to figure out what to call the person you booked the cabin with, “what do I call them a host?” You mutter under your breath before dialling the number.
Jungkook glances at you as you speak to the host in quick tones. "Got it, thanks," you say, giving a quick wave of your phone toward Jungkook. With the directions noted you can now get to moving.
"Okay, so we head north, then take-“
“North?" Jungkook interrupts, starting the engine. "Are you sure it's not west or whatever?" he asks, raising an eyebrow.
You glare at him. He glances at one map and thinks he knows his way around Switzerland.
"I just talked to the guy," you say flatly.
Jungkook smirks, recalling a past trip. "Remember last time we travelled, and we ended up on a dead-end street?" he says with a cheeky smile on his face. he’s teasing you.
You roll your eyes at the memory. You had been driving through the outskirts, and your GPS got wonky, causing you to go down a deserted road.
“If you’d listened to me, we wouldn’t have gotten lost,” you reply.
You stop bickering, finally following the GPS. Jungkook decides to follow the directions, and the tension eases as you leave the city behind.
The atmosphere shifts, replaced by a sense of awe at the breathtaking scenery. Low-capped mountains stretch into the horizon, Swiss chalets dot the landscape, and the sun reflects off the lakes. You’re glad you arrived during the day; cause nighttime would not have done the view justice.
You watch out the window, your voice filled with awe. "Oh my gosh, it's so beautiful." Jungkook glances at your direction before returning his attention to the road. "Yeah, it is," he agrees, equally mesmerized by the view.
"Can you grab my camera from the back?" he askes. Recalling his passion for photography, you can’t be surprised he has it with him.
You pull out the camera from his bag, noticing it’s larger and more expensive looking than the one you had gifted him. "Do you still have your other one?" you’re curious.
He knows what you’re hinting to. "It fell in water during a fishing trip with my team, but I'm getting it fixed."
“Do you still have the pictures.” You’d hate to lose them, even though they are null and void now, you still like how happy you looked in them.
“Yeah. They’re in my SD.” He informs you and you’re glad.
You fumble with the new camera, struggling to operate its buttons, he notices. "There's a button just there," he directs. Though you aren’t much of a photographer, you manage to snap some decent shots of the scene. You take a lot to make sure you have options.
Feeling playful, you turn the camera to jungkook and snap a pic of him. You had always admired his model-like features and often joked he should pursue modelling instead of his current path, which kept him 218 miles away. But now you realize modelling would only take him even farther.
He never agreed to the idea but never argued either. He preferred to appreciate beauty rather than be the centre of attention.
"Did you just take a picture of me?" he asks, a hint of surprise in his voice.
"Yeah, just one," you reply.
He doesn’t respond, leaving you to wonder what he’s thinking. Is he upset? Did you cross a pretending line?
"Wanna stop and take pictures," he grins, "y’know for your Instagram."
It’s not a bad idea, but you don’t want to be late and have the host waiting for too long.
"We won't be long." he looks over to see if you’re considering. He smiles when sees that you are. You don't post much on Instagram, and he knows that. But it wouldn't hurt to have some pictures from this trip.
"Let's be quick," you accept.
He pulls over to the side of the road and when you’re out he’s approaching you to take the camera. "Let me take some of you first," you insist. He isn’t so keen on it though.
"Just a few," you whine dodging him trying to take it from your hands.
"We're supposed to be quick." He reminds you. "And you know I'm not a fan of pictures of me."
 You not wanting to bicker. You hand it over to him. "But I will take pictures of you eventually," it’s a promise.
You quickly get posing on a spot you like, and he snaps several pictures. Some you were prepared for, while others were candid of you looking up a bird flying over, like you’ve never seen a bird before. or just in awe of the scene behind. Why do the birds seem so majestic here?
Jungkook smiles as he continues to take photos, forgetting the time. "I think that's enough. We're going to be late," you say, running out of poses to do.
You start walking to the car and he snaps one more picture of the scene before getting back and starting the car.  Whilst adjusting to the warmth he hands you the camera.
"These are so pretty," you bulge your eyes out at how good jungkook is at taking pictures. You can definitely see the difference. Jungkook can’t help but feel a sense of pride. You scroll through the camera, admiring more pictures.
Then you scroll a little too far and notice a series of photos featuring a friend—someone he seems to be close to. In one, she leans on his shoulder, a gesture that causes some type of discomfort or irritation. You couldn’t be sure, you’re too busy scrolling. She smiles too hard, you judge.
gosh you're pathetic. Why are you acting like this. The man is not your boyfriend he can do whatever. The statement causes an unwanted sour taste to form over your taste buds.
You continue to scroll, analysing the photos, each one deepening your insecurities.
"Careful, you're gonna damage the buttons," Jungkook jokes when he notices your rushed movement. He wonders what has you that way.
When he speaks, you’re brought back to reality. Though you’re brought back with an attitude. You switch off the device and lay it back where you found it, sitting back down with a scowl on your face and jungkook wonders the cause.
You had been fine just a moment ago. He doesn’t say anything and focuses fully on the road ahead. The silent drive to the cabin feels anything but aesthetic.
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You sigh as the car slows, leaving behind the snow-covered path. When you approach the cabin, it’s instantly recognizable from the photo. At least you weren’t lost or scammed. The place looks serene. It’s blanketed in snow. It’s not like those huge family ones. It’s small just to fit you and jungkook. You’d have no money to buy anything or activities if you booked those larger ones. And they’re unnecessary cause it’s just the two of you.
Jungkook parks the car, and as you both step out, the awkwardness that’s shadowed the trip returns. It had been there from the beginning, lingering beneath exchanges and strained silences. Brief moments, like taking pictures earlier, had been relieving, but even that had soured quickly. Now, neither of you had much to say.
The cabin’s host, a kind older man with a thick Swiss accent, greets you warmly, showing you around the cozy interior and pointing out the back patio before leaving. Once alone, you both quietly bring in the luggage. The silence is deafening, broken only by the crunch of snow you step on.
Due to your irritation that some how still lingered you step a little too hard on the icy ground, and in an instant, your foot slips. You land awkwardly in a mix of snow and dirt, the impact cushioned but still hurting.
“Are you okay?” Jungkook calls, his voice tinged with concern and amusement. He’d drop the luggage to come check on you if you hadn’t brushed him away with your hand.
Still irritated, now cause of the fall, you dust yourself off and move yourself inside. You drop the luggage in bedroom and start taking off your sweater, only to have Jungkook walk in moments later.
“One bed,” he states, looking at the large, centred piece of furniture. “Looks comfy.” You seem to have forgotten the cabin was lover’s themed, so it did only have one bed. The host had asked you if it was a problem when he saw the look on your face but you just brushed it away at you being tired.
You glance at the bed, then at him. “Yeah. Guess you’ll have to take the couch,” you joke, though your tone comes out flatter than intended.
“Nope.” He flops onto the bed, which creaks under his weight, making him pause to check if it’s broken. When it holds, he relaxes. “I’m sleeping right here.”
You sigh, deciding it’s not worth arguing. You’ve shared a bed before—it shouldn’t be a big deal so many times at that. But those times are not now and you have to deal with your new circumstance.
“I’m gonna take a shower,” you announce, expecting him to leave the room. Instead, he sprawls comfortably on the bed.
“Knock yourself out,” he replies casually.
Groaning, you grab your toiletries and head to the bathroom. The hot water feels like a gift, relaxing your tense muscles. If only the whole trip could feel this peaceful.
When you return, Jungkook is gone, though his shoes by the door confirm he hasn’t gone far. You search through your suitcase for a sweater, only to realize you packed just one sweater—the one now wet and dirty. Frustration bubbles as you grab a thin, long-sleeved shirt. It’ll have to do, though you doubt it’ll keep you warm in tomorrow’s outdoor activities.
Meanwhile, Jungkook in the kitchen has immersed himself in exploring the layout of it. whilst on his expedition his attention drifts to a tiny blue bird minding its business outside the window. He leans into it but carefully not to scare it away. Thankfully it doesn’t seem to find him a bother. “Got any advice for me?” he murmurs, taking a peek behind him. The bird doesn’t react, oblivious to his internal conflict. He’s unsure—about you, about himself, about what this trip is supposed to accomplish.
When you enter the kitchen and done talking to his new friend who doesn’t present him with anything viable but his company, he’s quick to point out the lack of groceries. “We should go shopping. It’s on your itinerary, right?” he teases lightly.
You nod, unsurprised he remembers. You’d always been the planner, the one who thought of everything. Maybe that’s why the breakup hurt so much—it came so suddenly, leaving no time to plan how to feel or move on.
As he’s about to suggest leaving immediately, he notices you rubbing your arms. “Aren’t you cold?” he asks, gesturing to your thin shirt.
“I’m fine,” you reply dismissively, though you clearly aren’t.
“Put on a sweater before you get sick,” he insists. His boyfriend instincts linger, even now.
You hesitate but eventually admit, “I forgot to pack an extra one.” The way how stares at you is so embarrassing for you.
Jungkook chuckles softly, though not unkindly. “Of course you did.” You roll your eyes. He moves to grab a sweater from his suitcase and hands it to you. “Here. Borrow this.”
You take it, the faint scent of his cologne that seems to be on everything he wears no matter how much he washes, invaded your senses. “Thanks,” you say quietly, slipping it on and hoping not to ruin this one too.
By the time you return from the store, exhaustion settles in. You both sit in the living room, cups of hot cocoa in hand. Jungkook flips through the channels while you sit quietly, the warmth of his sweater and the fire calming you.
“You’ve made a lot of friends in Jeju,” you say suddenly, your tone sharper than intended.
Jungkook pauses, confused. “What friends?”
“Colleagues, maybe? Customers? I saw the pictures on your camera,” you admit, staring into your cup instead of at him.
He leans back, waiting. He knows what you’re referring to and could explain that the woman in the photos was a client a little too excited and touchy about her wedding rehearsal photos, and had wanted photos with him. But he wants you to ask.
Instead, the silence stretches, filled with unspoken questions—questions about Jeju, the photos, the breakup, and even yourself. You sigh, pushing them aside.
“is there something you wanna ask?”
“There’s nothing I want to ask,” you finally say, though the bitterness in your voice betrays the truth.
Jungkook laughs softly, shaking his head. “I thought we agreed on pretending.” His voice is still soft.
“I know. Just don’t want you pretending if you’ve got other things going on.”
Jungkook chuckles taking a sip of his cocoa.” I’m good.”
“I’m good too.”
“Good.”
You watch him stand a sly smirk adoring his face. “let’s go back to pretending now, okay?” he says looking at you.
You mumble a sure and he walks off. Probably to sleep.
Sleeping the same bed is even more awkward. After spending some minutes you’d decide you were too tired to be awake, you came the bedroom.
Jungkook was still awake staring at his phone, and for some reason shirtless. He likes to sleep shirtless and the tension between you two isn’t going to stop him.
Jungkook tries to keep his eyes to himself as you change into your pajamas. You didn’t want to be childish so you just changed right there. It’s nothing he’s never seen before. He won’t act like the action doesn’t cause a rise in memories and he holds himself to not thinking further. Soon you’re crawling into your side and laying facing away from him. Jungkook chooses to lie on his back, the bed big enough for you to keep your distance. He turns off the lights but your eyes remain open staring into the dark.
As the night continues, none of you are able to fall asleep. Jungkook tries to make himself comfortable, his shifting cause you to think he might be moving closer, but he doesn’t. why do you feel sad. Your brain is used to being close to him and him holding you in situations like this. And he too is used to wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer into him. But there’s none of that.
“I can’t fucking sleep.” he groans frustratedly sitting up. He runs his hands in his hair. He looks over at you thinking you’re asleep, the darkness preventing him from actually knowing. He’s jealous at the idea of you being able to sleep, but when your frustrated voice sounds, he’s relieved. Relieved that he’s not the only not able to sleep.
“Same.” You mutter remaining on your side.
Jungkook huffs and puffs contemplating on asking what he’d been debating. Your bodies are probably used to sleeping closer to each other, so maybe that’s’ why it’s hard. You surely won’t mind if it means you get to sleep right?
He looks over to you and how far you seem from. He doesn’t like, hates the reality of it. “Can I sleep closer to you.” His words and the fact that he actually said takes you aback. You freeze. Your silence is killing him, he shouldn’t have said it. he should take it back, well—but he’s already sai-
“Okay.” Okay? Well, that was easy, he thought you’d be looking at him weird. but no, you just lay on your side waiting for him.
When he said closer you never thought he meant this close. You’re the closest you can be. But you don’t mind it, it actually brings you that giddy feeling, like it’s your first time cuddling. You realize just how much you missed it. He nuzzles his face in your neck and this is when he’d kiss your shoulder and neck but he doesn’t and the detail is gravely missed. He has to hold himself from not doing it.
“We’re going to move to the middle of the bed, darling.” It’s only then that you realize how much at the edge you were. You shuffle yourselves and move into the center and get comfortable in the position.
“Are you comfortable?”
So much you hate to say it. You can’t even bring yourself to be angry. “y-yeah.” You can barely respond coherently with how his voice is so close sending goosebumps all over you.
“Can I put my around you? It’s the only place I can put it.” he tries to explain, but you were actually hoping for it.
You nod for him to go ahead and he wraps his arm around you. Honestly, he should’ve just asked if he could cuddle you, because this is basically what you’re doing. He didn’t have to mask it; you’d have said yes either way. He doesn’t know that though.
Now that you’re close to him and him to you, you both weirdly fall asleep, very quickly at that.
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First thing on your itinerary was to visit the Lindt home of chocolate you’d been drooling at the thought of it since you planned this trip. It would honestly be a crime to visit Switzerland and not visit the Lindt factory. Being a lover of chocolate no activity on your list will be as good as this.
“I don’t know why they have us putting our bags away.” Jungkook whines taking off his jacket, as required and placing it in a locker. “How am I supposed to carry my chocolate.” His speech is almost childlike. You just chuckle.
 ” That’s why they do it.” You inform him, with a soft smile and start to walk ahead of him. Jungkook walks behind you, watching how you look around with wonder.
Did he mention how good he feels right now. The sleep he had last night was the best he’s had in a while. And it only serves to tell him how much he’s missed your presence. Just you as a whole. Being away from you for so long has had an effect on him too. It’s only now, that he’s not able to do all the things he used to do, that he realizes how much he’s missed it. And how much you mean to him.
“Oh my gosh.” Jungkook watches how you take in the aroma of chocolate. It invades his senses and when you’re turning around to check on him, he’s nodding. You want him to enjoy this just as you are.
You gasp and it’s when you spot the huge chocolate fountain that you pull Jungkook’s attention to it by his arm. “it’s so fucking huge.” You say still holding onto him.
“that’s what she said.”
You roll your eyes. “Grow up.” You both laugh. and it’s when you’re lost in laughter and admiring the fountain that jungkook looks down to see you still holding his arm. So, in a swift action of no thought, all instinct he moves to hold your hand.
Your head sharply moves to look at him then at his hand holding yours and then back up at him. He’s got this innocent smile on his face and you can’t help but warm up into his hold. You don’t mind the action of holding hands but you fear what it implies. Is he for real or still pretending?
For the first minutes you stay holding hands, until jungkook is pulling away to grab his camera. You rub you hands together to try and regain your sense of independence. What the heck are you doing, holding hands? This pretending thing Is a good idea, but it’s definitely messing with you in some way. All ways. He’s giving you things that you’ve been craving. The cuddle at night, the holding hands, you’ve missed it all. But you don’t know where it’s coming from, does he miss you too or is he pretending. To think of it you never really discussed what type of pretending you’re doing. Are you pretending to still be together or are you pretending to be good friends. Gosh this is so stressful. And confusing. You wonder if he’s stressing like you are. He seems calm. He’s handling this so well.
“Wait—I need a picture of you. Stand still.” He points the camera to you and you’re quick to turning your head away.
“it’s fine you don’t need to-” snap.
He doesn’t give you the time to object and just snaps. “Jungkook stop taking pictures of me.” He doesn’t. you’re embarrassed to be doing this in public. But he seems thrilled. “Okay wait-” he doesn’t so you choose to reaching for the Lense. But jungkook doesn’t mind filling his storage with pictures of your palm. “Kook, wait.”
“Kook?” he questions smiling. You realize your mistake. Honestly you didn’t mean to call him that, it just came out naturally for you to get him to stop. And it worked. Though now it shifts the air.
You groan. “I didn’t mean it like that.” You roll your eyes. You don’t even know what you’re saying.
He doesn’t linger on it more, which honestly helps your case. The blush on your face is deserving of a picture. Snap.
“Stop that before I revoke your privileges.” You threaten. He doesn’t want that.
He raises his hands in surrender. “won’t do it again.”
You ignore him and turn to keep walking.
“Can take more later though?”
You don’t answer, but he takes it as a yes. You’ve always been his muse, it’s not gonna stop now. His camara is now getting some action.
This place is actually so beautiful, smells amazing too. The pictures you saw did not do it justice.
“Look at the strawberries, the nuts. Ah—I’m in heaven.”
Jungkook smiles as he watches enjoy and pointing for him to look at the large container, of everything that goes well with chocolate. He’s really just happy that you’re including him, by telling him how much you freaking love this place or how you want to stay here forever. It makes him feel like things aren’t all that bad between the two of you and it can be fixed.
“Why are you looking at me like that.” You narrow your eyes at him. Gosh he forgot how long he was looking for. You’d been telling him something but he zoned out.
“Oh-nothing.” He clears his throat.
You just brush it off, cause if you linger on it, you’ll melt. Jungkook looking at you has been a weakness for you, there’s just something about him focusing on you and having only you in sight. “Anyway, I was saying try this.”
He doesn’t regain his consciousness before you’re bringing a spoon full of chocolate to his lips. he takes it, tasting the sweetness of it.
He licks the chocolate off his lips when you pull away. “Mmm….so good.” You nod glad that he likes it. Though way he’s looking at you makes you think he might not be talking about the chocolate. You choose to ignore your thoughts with a cough.
As you go on you learn facts about chocolate and the factory and jungkook takes the pictures. When walking around you make sure to not forget to collect little pieces of chocolate from the dispensers. And it’s not long before your hands are getting full.
When your expedition is over, you’re returning to your bags to stuff them with your treasure.
“This is a lot of chocolate.” Jungkook states.
You shake your head. “it’s not that much.”
“Yeah of course an addict is telling me that.”
You gasp. “I’m not an addict.”
“Tell that to all the money I’ve spent buying you chocolate.” Money which it didn’t mind and loved spending.
“Honestly that’s all on you.” You say raising your hands. He chuckles.
Getting tired you both decide to go by the café inside the factory. Whilst there you both order some food to eat which is not chocolate, except you. For your beverage you picked to drink the famous hot cocoa. Which tastes like heaven made it themselves.
“How do I take this home with me?” you say motioning to your drink.
“Just stay.” He meant to say you both could just stay, but his tongue tripped.
You nod, thinking about it. “I could.” Moving to Switzerland and living here would be a dream. But unfortunately, things aren’t that easy. Finding a job would be hard, plus the language barrier would kill you.
“don’t.” he’s almost pleading. “I don’t know how I’d tell your family I lost you to Switzerland.” More like he doesn’t know how he’d fix things.
“Honestly it’s no competition.” You say in deep thought and analysis.
“What? you would leave me for Switzerland?” He says it not realizing causing you to chuckle. And when you look at him, he gets it.
The conversation doesn’t go farther after that. Jungkook just stays in his thought. When jungkook had made the decision to move. He honestly thought it wouldn’t be that bad. He’d plan on maybe moving you out to him when he settled down, but your job was a very hot topic. At the time he hadn’t realized how serious it was. But now he does.
If it was you moving, he’d be just as hurt. And it pissing him off that he hadn’t realize the impact.
For your second and last activity for the day, cause of the way time just flies by; is the largest indoor flea market.
You spend your time there; just looking around, eating, and buying stuff. During your move you make it a mission to take pictures of jungkook. And you do manage to take some good ones.
He also finds an opportunity to ask about your work and how it’s going. And if that co-worker that bothers you is still around. He’s glad to learn that she did get moved to another department. He’s happy with whatever makes you comfortable.
As you’re talking, you’re approached by a couple, older but not old and tourists as well. They ask you to take a picture of them and jungkook is glad to assist. When he’s done, they’re happy and offer to take a picture of you too, jungkook wants to decline the offer assuming you wouldn’t want to but you’re quick to accepting.
“you two look so lovely together.” The lady says and you have no clue what to say apart form an awkward thank you. You wouldn’t blame them for thinking you’re a couple, not with the way jungkook is smiling at the picture.
“Grow up kook.”
“What?” he whines. “It’s a good photo.”
You roll your eyes before walking away. He follows behind you, smiling.
-----
Soon your day on paper comes to an end and you’re returning to the cabin.
You did not know what to expect of your day in the morning. Your night was okay but would the rest of the day go the same? those were some of your thoughts. But to your pleasure the day went well, great even. You just hope it’s the same for the rest of the trip.
Jungkook is on cocoa duty (not assigned but he took the responsibility.) and you’d be lying if you said he didn’t do a good job at it every time.
Leaning against the counter holding your mug and watching him finishes up with his own, you watch.
“How’d you like the Lindt factory?”
He takes a sip before answering. “Great. Honestly enjoyed it more than I thought.”
“What? You don’t trust my judgement?” you watch as he leans on the counter opposite from you.
“it’s not that. Just never thought I was that big of a chocolate fan.”
You hum. Silence fills the kitchen as you’re just enjoying the drink. Why does the air feel so thick, is it the way he just leans there. Pajamas not doing a very good job at hiding his physique. Why the hell does he look buffer. Gosh, his arms look like they’d lift and lay you to your demise. In the morning you caught a glimpse of his shirtless torso, and you were about to lose your cool. To add gasoline to the fire he had just stepped out the shower and had not completely dried. Geez, if it wasn’t for your ability to leave the room, you don’t know what you would’ve done or said.
Jungkook has always had a keen eye for your little frustrated looks, the way you don’t blink, the way you wrap your hands around yourself or how you cross your legs. He knows. It’s the details he’s aware of. No one knows you like he does.
“I like this sweater on you.” He says pointing to the green sweater you’d just gotten back from the dry cleaners.
You look down at it. “Because it’s yours?” you raise a brow as you take a sip of your cocoa.
He shakes his head looking your body up. “no. because you look good in it.” He’s biting his lip, then his playing with that little lip ring. Yn, hold yourself.
You choke out a chuckle. “Jungkook.” It’s a warning for him. But he doesn’t take it.
“What? It’s not my fault you look good in all my clothes.” gosh you’re gonna die choking on this liquid. “Makes me want to just hand over my closet to you.” He’s coming closer to you, gosh what the fuck, he approaches but it’s the sink you’re standing in front he wants. You move. He rinses his mug, tired of the drink.
“Well, that won’t be necessary.” you say sliding away from his towering figure. Just to catch your breath, cause you’ve been holding it. Jungkook laughs at the movement. Just after, you’re rinsing your cup and placing it in the cupboard. You’re not gonna die choking on cocoa, or jungkook as a matter of fact.
“Think I’m going to bed.” You state thinking the bedroom will be your only place of solace away from him.
“Me too. I’m getting sleepy.”
You’re stiff as he walks behind you. You hope you’ll be able to sleep on your own tonight. Cause if jungkook just as much as touches you, you’ll turn into a puddle.
You’re quick to moving to your side and facing away from him as to not see him taking of his shirt. You know because you hear it drop.
“Goodnight.” He says turning off the light.
With all your might you mumble a goodnight to him too.
Tonight, you manage to fall asleep without cuddling. You sleep back-to-back close enough to feel the heat radiating off the other.
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Jungkook wanted, so badly to go skiing after seeing an advertisement for it and saw some people do it on your way to the cabin. You’re not one for these intense sports but since he went with you to the Lindt factory, you thought it’d only be fair to go as well. Just accompany him.
Though his won’t be sweet and rewarding.
“You wanna go with me?” he asks teasingly and you shake your head, as soon as you process his words.” come on.” He whines.
“I’ll just cheer you on from down here.” The process of skiing looks terrifying. What do you mean you had to go on those zip line things, and slide down. Not you. Nope.
“it’s not that bad. You’ll be with me.”
Though it sounds comforting it doesn’t change anything. “I’ll just stay here looking around and taking pictures for you.” You smile hoping it convinces him.
He chuckles, his bunny smile on show for you.” baby what are you so scared of?” the pet name comes out smoothly, catching you by surprise. But it does seat itself in and warm your heart.
“it’s just scary.” You wrap your arms around your body.
He sighs watching you closely. “Fine, but can we do something as exciting, later.” He stares at you scattering your brain for what he could be referring to. “Like ice skating.” Oh—he was thinking ice skating. Last night has your mind in a whirlwind.
“That sounds better.” Jungkook laughs cause it’s basically the same thing, but he won’t get into it.
“Okay then.” He says walking to the register. “we’ll do that later.” It’s a promise.
Jungkook is off skiing and you’re sat in doors, still able to watch the outside activities, landscape and events thought the large window. You don’t mind not going skiing, it’s not like it was on your list.
While you’re sat you decide it’d be a good time to call jimin and let him in on your trip so far.
“it’s not as awkward, anymore. It was at first. But then we just agreed to just enjoy the trip for the sake of our money.”
“The sake of your money?” he mocks.
You choke out a laugh. “Yes, for the money.” Is it? “he’s been nice and all. It’s actually not bad.” Jimin hums as he listens, this time at least you have his attention.
You’ve shockingly enjoyed the trip more than you thought, so far. If you just keep on, the whole trip could go well and you’d be back to your normal lives. You hate the sickness you feel at the thought. The trip will end, it is gonna end and you’ll be back to what you were before. Gosh.
“Sounds like the trip is going a little too well.”
You scoff. “it’s not that, we’re both just chill.”
“No fucking or kissing.”
You gasp and look around like someone could’ve heard that, but your phone is to your ear. “jimin! Oh my gosh.” The thought of it has you blushing still.
“Just sayin’. Jungkook’s probably dying. ”
You roll your eyes. He’s fine, you’re fine.
You go on talking but soon you have to end the call. Immediately you cut the call and stuff your phone in your pocket a figure sits next to you. Male, not jungkook. You pay no mind to him. you’re on a public bench anyone can sit next to you. He’s just in his own business. Is what you think until he’s reaching over to talk to you.
“Exciting isn’t it.” when he speaks you catch his foreign accent, not Swiss. Must be a tourist like you.
You awkwardly furrow your brows. “Huh?”
“Skiing.” He points.
Then it clicks that that’s what he’s talking about.
“I presume.” You say modestly. Why the heck is he talking to you.
“Presume? Haven’t you gone?”
“no.” You shake your head chuckling. “it’s not for me.”
“You can’t say that. You haven’t even tried.” You internally roll your eyes. Why does he seem to care so much. “Plus, why come to Switzerland in the winter and not try skiing.”
You don’t know why you carry on this conversation, but you feel like justifying yourself. “Honestly I just came for the Lindt factory.” You say shamelessly causing the stranger to laugh. he doesn’t seem like a weirdo or creep, but you can never know. He’s probably not talking to you out of pure interest. So, you try to keep your distance.
“you’ve been?”
“Yeah. Yesterday.”
He hums sound interested and you know this conversation isn’t ending anytime soon. “How was it?”
You scoff internally. “It was fun. Would recommend you’ll love it.” You don’t even know him; how would you know he’d like it. And to be fair you’d add that Jungkook’s presence made the place more exciting to be at. You assume he doesn’t have a jungkook. Speaking of jungkook, how long is he going to be? You should’ve just gone out on a walk instead.
He nods. “Well maybe you can show me.” You pause, okay now you’re starting to get uncomfortable. “I’m sorry I don’t mean it like that. It’s just that I came alone and it would be nice to have someone show me around.” He justifies but it doesn’t make you any more comfortable. “I’d pay for your ticket if that’s the issue.”
You chuckle. “I’m a tourist to, there’s not much I can show you.”
“I mean you’ve visited the Lindt, so you know more than me.” Gosh he’s so adamant.
You smile awkwardly wishing jungkook would just pop up.
“you’d be better off going with someone else.” You’re looking around as if you’ve lost something. The man catches on to the action.
“Am I making you uncomfortable.” Yes. very.
“No-” before you can finish your lie of a statement, Jungkook’s interrupts, voice anything but kind.
“Yes, you are.” He says firmly, body not open for discussion.
The guy turns to look at you, then jungkook, then back at you. “Do you know him?”
Hesitantly you respond. “yeah” you debate on what to say. “He’s a friend.” He is isn’t he?
Friend? Jungkook chuckles internally. “Excuse us.” He spits out to the man.
The guy is taken aback, but just stands. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.” You just nod and give him an awkward smile as he walks away.
You sigh relieved that he’s gone.
 You and jungkook share a glance before he’s sitting down.
“Friend?” Jungkook asks when he sits next to you.
You raise a brow. “What? you wanted me to lie?”
“Lie?” he says even stronger. You don’t know what he’s pointing to right now.
“Are you parrot?” You chuckle trying to get smart with him.
Jungkook scoffs at how you avoid his eyes. “You couldn’t have said I was your boyfriend.”
“But you’re not.” You spit out a little quickly.
When you turn to look at him you catch how his jaw clenches. And if you weren’t arguing right now, you’d think it’s the hottest thing. “But you could’ve just lied so he leaves you alone. Now he’s probably going to try to approach you again.”
“he’s not going to.” You say naively.
Jungkook is getting frustrated with this, a little more than he should. “I know guys like that, he’s going wait for a time when I’m not around and attack.”
“Attack?” you laugh at his word choice. Your laughter only serves to his anger. “You’re being dramatic”
“I’m not being dramatic, I’m being serious” his statement comes out a little strong and louder than you’d like
“don’t yell.” You warn him and he apologizes. “I get you feel like you need to protect me, but relax.”
He laughs at the way you think. You thinking he’s feeling like he needs to, no, he needs to. He wants to.
“I don’t feel like, I need to, I want to.”
You don’t say anything, he knows he’s got you, what more could you say. There’s nothing. Jungkook is the protective type, has always been. He’s shown you that many times in your relationship. And then, it made sense but now you feel like he shouldn’t have to bother himself with it. You’re not his responsibility anymore. “We should get ready to go for lunch.” you stand walking away.
Jungkook follows after you, knowing you’re now gonna give him attitude. Your folded arms are evidence of that. He’d normally just kiss the attitude away but for obvious reason he can’t.
-
“you’re not gonna ask how skiing was?” He tries really hard to open the air for conversation. He hates it when you argue. So, he tries to everything he can to lighten the air.
You stare down at your food. Your eyes not meeting him once. “How was it?” you don’t even sound interested which you hate because you are. You love to hear jungkook talk about things he loves.
“It was great.” He explains not into going into much detail like he wanted to. Your energy demoralizes him. “I’m sure they’re still open if you still want to try. He suggests but you’re quick to shaking your head.
When he’s about to say something, he’s getting interrupted. It’s a girl, the one he met when skiing. She showed him around some routes since she’s a local.
“Yn, this is Lena. I met her whilst skiing.” He says introducing you. “Lena this is yn, my friend.”
Fuck now you know how bad it stings.
“Hey yn. How are you liking you trip so far?” she asks politely in an accent.
You stare her up, taking in her features. She looks about your age, and gorgeous. Why is your body so rigid. Speak. “Umm- hi-I’m liking it well enough. Thanks.” you can hear how stiff and awkward your speech is. Gosh yn she hasn’t done anything to you, chill. Smile.
Jungkook breaks into your awkward encounter. “I’m gonna be seeing you at the ice rink, right?”
He says and she smiles a little too hard. You roll your eyes. What does he mean he’s gonna see her there. Is the a you and him trip anymore? Your food doesn’t look as appetizing anymore. “Yeah. I’m there often during the holidays.”
The way her voice rings in your head is jarring. Make it stop.
Soon your prayers are answered and she’s leaving. Though unlike her your heavy heart stays.
Jungkook turns to you, still staring at her route of exit. “You, okay?” your eyes return.
You shift your eyes to your hands. “Yeah, I’m just tired.” You stand from the table choosing to leave. “I think I’m gonna stop by the cabin.”
Jungkook is confused. But he just takes you as you are.
“Sure, let me get-” he threatens to stand.
“no. I’ll just take a train.”
He sits down. If you want to be alone it’s best if he lets you be.
When you get to the cabin, all alone. You find yourself falling into deep thought.
The pretend play you and jungkook are playing is good for you to enjoy the trip, but you won’t deny how much it only covers your true feelings. You play pretend and feel all these feelings as though you’re still together and then the trip ends and you’re sucked into being apart.  And it’s him leaving all over again.
You’re getting sick of it. There’s only so much pretending you can do.
Jungkook: ice skating later today?
He wants to be sure you haven’t changed your mind.
Not matter your emotions you still want to enjoy the trip.
You: sure. Meet you there.
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When you make it to the ice rink, your mood is still tense from lunch, which is your fault for holding on to the emotions for so long. To only sour your mood more, you spot jungkook talking to the Lena girl from lunch.
You roll your eyes and watch how she giggles a little too hard at something he says. Jungkook is a funny guy, but she shouldn’t be laughing, whatever he’s said can’t be that funny. This is so irritating. Why the hell is she even here.
When jungkook spots you, he has on a huge grin, but the sour look on your face has him dropping it. He thought maybe you wouldn’t be still upset by now. But he’s wrong. “Yn you’re here.” He says it like he wasn’t expecting you and you weren’t meant to be here, or that’s how you hear it.
“We made plans, didn’t we?” your tone is nothing more than flat and irritated.
“We did.” He turns. “You remember Lena?” He turns to point at her, like you can’t see her. Why’s she looking at you.
Oh, could you forget her. “I do.” You jeer.
“Hi.” she with her perfect smile. You’d liked to punch it in—your of course—you’d never actually so it.
“Hey.” It comes out awkward and strained. Wanting to get things over with you turn to jungkook immediately. “what’re we doing now?”              
“Um. We’ll have to get the skates.” He turns to Lena for some type of consultation, you scoff.
 “Yeah, this way.” she says turning to lead the way.
Jungkook turns to you, your folded arms the first thing he sees. He stands next to you. “You get here okay?” you didn’t arrive together which means you had to take public transport, which he knows you don’t mind but he just wants to check on you.
“Yeah.” You mutter before walking ahead of him. Do you even know where you’re going?
You want to enjoy it, but the emotions that are ahead of you block you from doing so completely. And of course, Lena is a pro at skating.
Jungkook is fairly good, for someone who’s just taken it up. You’d attribute that to his quick learner personality.
You on the other hand are struggling, and it’s pissing you off. You hold on to the half wall and glide. There’s a good amount of people around and honestly, it’s embarrassing. -like- there are even small kids better at it than you. It’d be better if you just stopped. There are probably other activities you could do. Ice skating (or skiing) is not the end all be all of Switzerland.
Jungkook would probably enjoy skating more with Lena, seeing that they skied together earlier. You question why jungkook even ever liked you in the first place. You’re not cool like Lena or even as adventurous, you do try but you don’t feel it’s enough. He’s better off with someone like her. It’s good you broke up so that he can be free to do whatever. The thought stabs at your heart.
Jungkook spots you from where he is walking out. The look on your face anything but happy. He’s swift to skating to you, making sure not to bump into anymore with how fast he’s moving. “Where you going?”
His concerned and soft voice only intensifies your frustration. Could he not see how irritated and bad at this you are. He was probably too busy to notice. He’s always busy.
 “You haven’t even travelled the while ring.” He chuckles awkwardly as you step off. He follows.
“I don’t know, I’m just not feeling it.” You don’t even dare look at him, because you know if you do your frustration will win and you’ll end up yelling or crying. And both are too embarrassing to do in public.
Jungkook scoffs. Jungkook can’t tell what’s going on with you but it’s definitely disturbing your ability to enjoy anything. He wants you to enjoy. But what’s irritating him is how you don’t want to communicate what you’re feeling to him. He’s always made himself a safe space for you to open up. But you never take it. Ever since he m0ved you’ve been distant, physically and emotionally. It’s frustrating cause all he wants is to be close to you in all ways. “You were not feeling skiing and now you’re not feeling this?”
Is he blaming you for not enjoying this? It’s not your fault you feel this way. You don’t even want to be feeling like this. You do want to enjoy skating, gosh you want to, so bad. But there’s just so much you’re holding on too that pretending can’t solve.
“Jungkook I’m not any good at this.” You gesture around eyes starting to sting when you watch how other people have fun while you argue. “You just go have fun with your Leni or Lena whatever.” You act like you aren’t sure of her name.
It’s the way you say it, the force and strain in the word. The way you look to the crowd in a jittering stare looking for her that let’s jungkook know what this is all about. Did it come off like that? She’s just a girl he met whilst skiing, he honestly never thought that far. Never thought you’d be thinking of it.
“Is this because of her?” he questions eyebrows furrowed trying to look at your face that’s staring down. Why the hell are this shoe laces so hard to untie. you just want to cut them off, but you’d probably have to pay for damages. Shit
Your frustration is replaced with another type of embarrassment, when jungkook is on his knee to replace his hands with yours to help you take the laces off. You just want the ground to swallow you right now. Unlike you Jungkook’s calmness is able to take the laces off. He tries to help you into your other shoes but you just brush him off. He moves.
Standing up and looking at you he asks. Voice calm like usual. “Is it?” you’d even forgotten his previous question. Do you have to answer him?
“I don’t know how it would be when you two are off to the other side of the ring. I’ve barely talked to her.” That’s exactly the problem why the heck do you feel like this when you haven’t gotten to know the girl. You barely know her intentions.
“It is.”
You groan rolling your eyes. “If you want help skating, I can help you. I’m sorry that I got carried away.” It’s probably one of the things you’re mad about. He just fucking left you like you didn’t make plans to come here together. Yeah, maybe your attitude made the distance between you, but he should know how to deal with it by now. Gosh you’ve been together for a good 3 years. He should know how you are.
And he does. That’s why he insists you’re acting like this cause of Lena. well, she’s probably just a catalyst and there’s something deeper that you two have to address.
You stand looking up at him, but he’s towering figure doesn’t make you as intimidating as you want to feel. “You don’t have to be sorry about anything, why? Cause you always know what you’re doing.”
“You know it’d be better if you just said it directly.” Whatever it is, because he wants to know. You want to walk past him but his hand around your wrist stops you. You look at it then at him. He’s not smiling, but not mad. Just concerned.
“I don’t--I’m not saying anything.” You snatch it form his grip and he lets you.
Jungkook’s face scrunches up in frustration. “That’s what you always say, then pull shit like this.”
You pause and stare at right in his--round eyes that are now, siren. “Shit like what?”
“This. Your fucking attitude.” He almost loses his tone but remembers that you’re in public, which is so fucking embarrassing. “You never want to talk about things.” He looks around for any watching eyes.
You just glare at him. Maybe you don’t like expressing yourself to him anymore. You’ve noticed it too. It had been hard for you to express yourself to him over a call, and sometimes shitty network. There had been days where you wanted to cry on his shoulders but only had the screen to rely on, so guess what you did. Nothing. You didn’t cry, you didn’t tell him anything. You’d just cry on your pillow after the call ends. “Maybe I don’t cause I know you won’t listen.”
That’s a hit to his ego. To him as a person.
“That’s bullshit and you know it. I always listen to you.” The blank look on your face has him questioning himself. “of course, I’m not perfect.”
You chuckle bitterly.
“Just go off to your little girlfriend.” And there it is, a confirmation of what he already knew.
You start walking to the entrance. And he follows. Shoes on. He’s not going to be able to skate with the heaviness in his heart. He’d end up sinking into the ice, which doesn’t sound so bad right now. “Come on.” He swiftly moves to standing Infront of you. He blocks you from moving and you just give up and just decide to look at his jaw, not wanting to look directly at him. Which was not a good idea, cause of how he clenches it. You look up into his eyes. “you’re jealous?”
“Who?” he’s a parrot and now you’re an owl, he wants to say but finds it inappropriate for your mood.
“You are so jealous.”
“I’m no-”
“don’t lie to me.” You try to push at his chest for him to move out of your way, but your plan backfires giving him leeway to hold your hand firmly to his chest. Hard as a rock even through he’s sweater. “Tell me why you’re jealous.”
Instead of answering him directly you try to change the topic. You swear you can feel his heart beat through his sweater.
“Don’t act like I couldn’t see you jealous too when that guy approached me.” You try to one-up.
“I was jealous.” His confession has you wanting you dig a hole and hide yourself. It’s so easy for him to say, you weren’t even enjoying your conversation with that guy. “Difference with me is that I can say it.”
Shit. Shit. What do you say now. Get angrier, that always works, well not really.
“Whatever. I’m not jealous.” You look away from him. Are you really doing this in public. Jungkook doesn’t look like he gives a fuck right now, he just wants an answer. One which he’s not going to get.
“Tell me what you’re so jealous about?” his voice lowers
“How many times do I have to say I’m not jealous.” Till you can’t deny it anymore, the thought runs through Jungkook’s mind.  “Just go have your fun.” You finally decide you’re tired of feeling his heart beat perfectly.
“you’re so ridiculous y’know.” He watches you move slight away, anger not faltering one bit. You’re determined to being upset. “can’t we just talk about this. It seems to be bothering you.”
It is. It’s fucking gnawing at your heart, your lungs, your mind.
“Nothing’s bothering me, I’m fine.” You breathe in, relaxing and calming down just a bit. “I just don’t want to be out there all on my own, while you’re having fun with some else.” Jungkook licks his lip. He doesn’t have anything else to say. What he has to say can’t be said here or whilst you’re unable to hear.
“I’m going home.” You pass by him and he doesn’t bother turning to watch you walk out.
“Korea?” it’s possible for you to want to leave. And the thought causes him to bite down hard on his bottom lip. Cause if you leave on these terms, nothing’s gonna change and he’d never get another chance. You’d avoid him like the plague.
“No, the cabin.” You state and he’s relieved. “Have fun.”
“Everything okay?” jungkook is startled by Lena’s voice who walked around to find him after she noticed he was gone.
“Yeah.” You force a smile. “I’ll just get going.” He informs her. He already has his stuff so there’s no need for him to go back inside. “Thanks for getting us in, though we didn’t even stay long.”
“No problem. It was fun, wish I got to talk to her.”
“Yeah, she isn’t normally like that.” Cause you aren’t.
“I understand.”
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You don’t immediately go to the cabin. Instead, you go to the sauna you had been eyeing. It could probably be the only way to relax you. The sweat dripping down will mask the real tears falling down your face. You’re glad you’re alone right now.
You have your head leaned back thinking about what had just previously happened. The thoughts not wanting to leave you.
You hear the door open but you don’t bother looking, you’ve got a lot to think about. “hey stranger..” the familiar voice speaks just as shocked. You sharply open your eyes. Wondering if it’s you he’s speaking to but you’re just the two of you in here.
You’re just the two of you.
“didn’t expect to find you here.” He says setting himself down just in front of you and you looking at him oddly. Do you have bad luck?
“hmm” you chuckle awkwardly. You make a plan to gradually scoot yourself to the door. Being with him here does make you uncomfortable but you try to stay to enjoy what’s left of your time. You expect silence but the man doesn’t see on the same level. “Went to the Lindt factory like you said. Was honestly the best of everything.”
“I’m glad you liked it.” you say like you’re a worker at the factory or care.
“It would’ve been better if you came too.”
You awkwardly chuckle and finally decide to sit up. You came here to think and relax but this guy couldn’t be more of a bother. “I’m sure I would’ve just made it worse.”
He chuckles and smiles your way. A smile you do not reciprocate “I doubt.”
“Is your friend around?” Now you should fucking leave.
“Mm?” you ask like you didn’t hear. Fucking sirens are blaring. He’s not giving off I’m gonna leap at your vibe. It’s more of his inability to give up that bugs you. “Oh- ahh yeah. He’s gonna be here.”
He turns to look at the door like Jungkook’s about to walk through the door, but he doesn’t. gosh you wish he would. “isn’t it hard to have male friends like him.” You look at him brows furrowed, confused. You wait for him to elaborate and he’s quick to it. “Protective.” He says.
“how?”
“makes it hard for you to live your live and get to know people.” You laugh. it’s not like jungkook has his hands on you and pulling you away from people who want to talk to you. He’s actually for it but he just has a good discernment of creeps. As you sit here you reflect on his words from before when you initially met the guy. Gosh you should really start listening to jungkook. Makes you realize how right he is—sometimes--
“no.” your tone is sharp that the soft one you’d been giving him.
He shakes his head. He lifts his hands in defence saying, “I think he’s doing too much.” Now you’re getting upset, visibly so, which is not lost to the man. Who the fuck does he thinks he is. He’s the one doing too much, “I’m not some weirdo, I promise.” He hasn’t shown any signs of it yet, but you don’t give a fuck and you’re not gonna wait around for him to show it.
“I think you’re doing too much.” You snare abruptly standing up. He can tell the irritation on your face and is about to defend himself but you’re quick to cutting in. you’re not about to have it.
“I don’t know how your long your trip is but if you see me around, please don’t speak to me.”
“Wait.” You don’t.
Sauna time done you decide to go back to the cabin, feeling anything but relaxed. Daylight already lost.
Today has honestly knocked you out, as though you’ve done anything energy straining. It’s more of an emotional strain. When you walk in jungkook isn’t anywhere to be seen. So, you just assume he never got back. Makes you wonder where the hell he is and why he didn’t tell you, but you’re in no place to convict him cause you never informed him of your sauna endeavours as well. You’re both grown adults and can move around Switzerland without the other—but—why do you feel entitled to know where he is. You lost those privileges when you broke up and now when you left him at the rink.
Maybe a steamy shower will do what the sauna didn’t finish cause of you interruption. After that you decide to end your night early, you’ve got nothing to do after all.
you toss and turn in bed, barely able to get a linear sleeping time. Everything just feels so weird and off. Even worse than in the beginning. It’s all a different type of awkward, which you hate. Jungkook isn’t sleeping next to you which prompts you to checking the time.
1:39am your phone tells you.
Where the hell is he, you’re starting to get scared. You’re not worried about his safety cause jungkook is very capable in that sector, --well unless he got shot—shot?  Why are thinking of that. Who’d fucking shot him, let alone in Switzerland. He’s never been in any trouble with the law or anyone. You’re getting paranoid, if you don’t see jungkook in the flesh, well and not wounded, you’re gonna lose your mind.
Putting on the sweater that has been a staple and carried you through the trip you walk out the bedroom to the open floor living room. you sigh when you don’t spot jungkook. You won’t be able to go back to sleep even if you wanted to. Cause you don’t feel like it and are losing your mind. As you’re standing in the living room like an anxiety ridden mom waiting for their teenager child at midnight, you hear it. It’s wood chopping sounds. Harsh and fast. You do have some cabins around you so it could be your neighbours—but no--the sound is closer to yours, like it’s just outside. So, you curiously walk to the door which would lead you closer to the sound. Maybe you aren’t as afraid cause you assume it’s jungkook. And it is.
You relax when you spot his figure well and healthy.
He doesn’t notice as you stand watching him. bottom lip chewed down on. Why the hell is he chopping wood at 1 in the morning.
You want to say something. You need to. Maybe apologize about what happened at the rink, you have a fair share in the argument. Since waking up or maybe after the sauna you realized how childish your behaviour was. You ruined the moment. When you could’ve just asked jungkook to help you and he would’ve been there, hadn’t you chosen to give into your irritation. Irritation of seeing him with a woman. There you said it.
His muscles flex as he moves to drop the axe down on the wood.
This is not what you want for you and jungkook. Arguing and not able to talk or share air. It’s not what you want. Even if things do officially end, you’d want to end it on calm and friendlier terms.
As you watch him you notice how his jaw tightens. He’s not just chopping wood. You start to worry for him when his movements grow harsher, of the larger chunk of wood.
“What did the wood do to you?” you try to be neutral.
He didn’t notice you behind him. So, he’s startled by the sound of your voice. Turning to look at you holding yourself in the door way, he chooses to take a break. He got so carried away he forgot he was cutting wood for the fire place and had cut too much. He drops the axe into snow. “Ditched me at the ice rink.” He says going to pick up some pieces of wood to bring inside.
Fuck you feel so bad. You stay silent watching him until he’s brought all the wood in and finally closing the door. Which allows for the warmth from the now blazing fire to fill the house. Now in warmer climate, jungkook takes off his large sweater and you drop your arms that were still wrapped around you.
“I’m sorry about that.” You mumble softly. He stands at the sink, you assume to make himself something warm.
“it’s okay, it’s not like I went all the way to stay in touch with some girl so she could get me—us--a good deal at the ice rink. Then I take you there and you ditch the thing entirely.”
You do feel horrible about to, but his tone irritates you causing you to respond as just that. Which you immediately regret.
“I left you with her, weren’t you happy with that.” You have an interesting way of saying things that bother you.
Jungkook pauses his actions and stares at you with a seriously confused face. He scoffs. You’re not making sense. “You know that’s not what I wanted.” He returns to his mug. “I wanted to spend it with you.” His voices calms.
Fuck. Uhm what do you say. You should probably say you’re sorry. “I’m sorry.”
Jungkook just listening. He just doesn’t understand, he wishes you could just be straight forward. Frustrated and tired of hiding behind a task, he drops the cup to give you, his attention.
“Did I say something wrong?” you stand where you are but jungkook moves. To you. You panic but he doesn’t walk closer than a few feet from you. You don’t know how you’d handle yourself if he came any closer. At the rink you almost died. “At the rink?” he clarifies like you’re not fully aware. He just wants to make sure that you’re on the same page. Cause you can think of other times he might have feared he’d said something wrong.  “I honestly shouldn’t even have started talking to her.” He rubs a hand over his face.
Jungkook has never been malicious to you in your friendship before or relationship. Or even now. He’s been cordial. He’s the only man who’s treated so well and calmingly. Of course he has his imperfections, you both do. But it doesn’t take from how well he’s treated you. He never crosses a line.
“it’s not even that.” You’re looking off to the side and holding yourself again,
Gosh, he’s really holding himself right now. He bites his lower lip and clenches his jaw to hold himself back from just walking up to you and making you look him in the eyes. “Then what’s wrong. Please talk to me.” He pleads.
“I don’t know,” you whisper still looking beyond him, your voice is barely audible.
He’s begging, really for you to just tell him something. “Please don’t say that.” He responds, his tone a mix of frustration and pleading. He steps closer just a few centimetres away, if you unfolded your arms you’d probably bump into his chest.
“I don’t-” you start but your voice cuts you off, “it’s the way you-” you aren’t able to finish. What are you going to do with yourself. This is embarrassing, you can barely form or organize your thoughts and your mouth can barely move to speak. You’re not even going to talk about how hard it is for you to look him in the eyes. You just settle with staring at his other supporting features. His hair, his ears (that are red from what you assume is frustration—it’s not--), his eyebrows and then you skip to look at his nose--
“was it me talking to that girl?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it.” You push away slightly.
“But we have--you know what--I want to.” He moves to block your action of walking away. You thought you were strong enough. You thought you’d manage to talk about this. But you can’t. not when it makes you want to cry.  “I want to talk about it.” His voice is stern but not harsh. It’s just strong enough to let you know he’s not letting this go. It’s funny how something so insignificant can cause you to be in this situation. Forced to express and confront your emotions, the one’s you’ve been running from since the trip began, the one’s you told yourselves you’d pretend didn’t exist. You fooled yourselves by dodging the topic.
Now you’re here. “While we’re at it we can talk about why you broke up with me.” He’s not asking if you can talk about it, he’s telling you it has to be talked about and he’s not gonna let it go by. Not this time.
At his words, all your emotions unite to form a single unit of defence. “me? you agreed too.” You point at him face scowling.
“I only did cause it’s what you wanted, and I didn’t want to hold you back.”
You stare confused. “Hold me back from what?” what the fuck does he think you’ve been doing. You hope he doesn’t think you’ve been out and about since breaking up, that’s been the last thing on your mind.
“From living the life, you wanted to, without me.” His upset at the thought leading his voice to come out a little passive aggressive.
He does think that, you can see it. “Without you? I don’t want that.” You state. “But how can I live a life with you when you’re miles away, always busy. And can barely visit.” You just talk. Finally, your gears are moving. But the problem is that so are the tears. “You moving away is you choosing to live without me too.” You choke on your words a little. “Even I didn’t want to tie you to me or hold you back from your dreams that’s why I tried to li- live with it, but it got so unbearable kook. I couldn’t take it. it felt like I was alone. In fact, I was alone.”
Jungkook feels sick hearing that you felt alone.
“You know I did try.” His voice is soft, moving himself into your circle. You let him. He can’t help himself but cup your cheek. The action feels comforting, almost relieving. At least he’s here and you’re not talking over the phone, makes it much easier for you to sink into his touch.
You hold the wrist that’s caressing your cheek. Gosh you want to keep his touch here forever. “I know that’s what hurts more you tried but it still wasn’t enough. I really did want it to work. I still do.” On your last sentence you look up at him and he’s already staring at you, the thump of his other hand coming swiftly to wipe your stray tears. You sniffle. “Cause honestly I’ve missed you kook.” You feel comforted playing with the end of his sweater.  “So much. I miss how we were before you moved. When it was easier for us to be together.” your fingers take a journey from the bottom of his sweater to the neck.
Your palms lay flat on his chest and his hands move to softly hold your wrist, not to move you away but you keep there.
“I know we said we’d pretend. A-and I thought I could. But I can’t kook.” On cue with his name, you look up at him. “fuck- I never knew how much I hate seeing you talk to other—" you can’t finish your sentence, but it’s okay cause he’s finished for you in his mind. “I’m sorry for attitude.”
He glides his hands from your wrists down your arms until they are both on your waist. “I’m sorry too.” He’s pulling you closer, your hands still on his chest, but now for stability. “I’m so sorry I was too distracted for you. You didn’t deserve that. You don’t serve that.” He’s caressing your back. “okay?” you have to answer but you can only bring yourself to nodding. All he’s ever wanted was to know. Know what was wrong and how he could fix it.
“I’ve missed you too.” He smiles lightly bringing his nose to brush against yours. The action has you tilting your head upwards. His lips itch to touch yours, but they don’t they just hover, he still has more to say. And he wants to say it close enough for you to feel it. “If only you knew how I dreaded every morning and realized you weren’t next to me. Every time I just wanted to fly back home.”
“So, what stopped you.” You’re looking at his lips. his rosy and moist lips from how hard he’s been biting and licking on that. You wanna do that. You wanna kiss him, wanna be the only biting down on his lips.  you wanna do a lot of things right now. You wanna run your hands through his hair remind yourself of its texture, you wanna lift that sweater off, that holds his cologne so well, the earthy lavender scent, that crawls its way through your system. You wanna take that sweater off him, --feel, see—just how much that gym membership as proved itself valuable. You know you won’t be disappointed, jungkook loves the fucking gym.
“I don’t even know. But all I know is that it’s not gonna stop me anymore.” Him nudging his nose closer has you tilting your head to meet his lips. the air between you feels heavy. The feeling pulling your lips to meet. And when the do, it’s fervent. His kiss is urgent but slow, not wanting to be apart from you for a second.
 Your bodies are hooked together as Jungkook is moving you back into a wall. The kiss intensifies when he leans your head back with his hand around your neck. You’re gripping onto his sweater for support and breathing him in for life.
Jungkook clings onto your lips for life too, even if he needs to breath he doesn’t stop. You moaning into his mouth will suffice. He doesn’t know where to keep his hands. Should he use them to tilt your head back to deepen the kiss, (if he goes any deeper he’s gonna sink.) whilst he uses the other to pull you leg up by your thighs, his grip surely leaving crescent moons as decorations. He doesn’t know what to do with them. For the moment he uses them to pull he sweater over his head. You’ve been clawing at it to come off.
Now shirtless you can feel his skin for what you remember it to be silky-smooth. So delicate that you fear leaving scratch marks on him, but jungkook encourages it, he begs you to do it. Your hands roam his body, first his large back, muscles flexed, then down his firm chest then down to his defined midsection. “What am I to do with all this.” You say breathless.
“You tell me. It’s all yours.” Your lips are meeting again. Tongues tagging at each other. For some reason the rich, sweet and completely irresistible taste of chocolate lingers on your lips, but he loves it and is drinking it up.
Jungkook finds that his hands are better at gripping your thigh and lifting it to wrap around his waist. His core moves into you and you feel how hard he is against you. You’re thankful for his thin pajama pants.
Your hands pull at the root of his hair, though it’s shorter you make it work, making him groan into your mouth. You both can’t fucking breath at this point, which is the only reason you’re pulling away. Your heavy breaths brushing against each other.
“jungk-” you’re moaning for him to take you to bed but he’s steps ahead of you. Your feet don’t have to fret cause he’s lifting you by the thighs to lay you on the edge of the bed.
You lay back on the bed but legs on his shoulder, he’s kneeling between your legs. Your pants are still on but not for long. In a swift motion you’re left in your plain black panties. The ones with the little bow. He chuckles at the detail. When you see what he’s laughing at you get self conscious. Jungkook looks up at you confused why you’re closing your legs.
“I didn’t know we’d be in this position, so these are the one I brought.” You try to explain yourself cheeks blushing red. He doesn’t know why you’re so insecure about the detail. He loves them.
For a quick kiss he’s on his feet hovering over you. “it’s okay, I like my gifts wrapped in bows.” He smirks and the comment has you calling out his name in shock. peck. He’s back on his knees staring at your core. The bow is a detail he’ll miss but he’d gotta take them off. Fuck is all he can think when your cunt is right in front of him, wet. Is this where he’s meant to die, right in your cunt from suffocation cause he won’t be able to detach himself from you.
Your legs are planted on his shoulder, your ass just at the edge of the bed. When he first swipes his tongue through your folds, it takes you by surprise. Gosh you missed him being right there.
“fuck” you whimper the sound not being able to be masked. Your slick, probably mixed with his saliva, drips down your cunt, down his chin. His nose is so deep in it that some of your juices run up his nose. Is this how fucking cocaine sniffers feel?  He can’t wait till his cock is buried snuggly it. He sniffs in, on purpose this time, takin git once more. You grind on his face making him suck harder at your clit. You’re getting dizzy and gripping hard at the sheets. His nails dig into your thighs harshly, the pain causing pleasure.
Everything is so intense you can’t tell apart your orgasm. Fuck you can’t be coming this fast from just his tongue. Shit. “Jungkook. Don’t stop” You whine the intense feeling approaching quick, your walls tightening and fluttering around his tongue. Jungkook’s so carried away he only realizes you’re coming when your legs are shaking. He drinks everything that leaves and it’s only when you’re pulling his head back from overstimulation that he realizes he should take a breath. He’s starved can you blame him?
“you’re so gorgeous baby.” he says peppering kisses on your thighs. “Wanna do that again for me.” He’d absolutely would eat you out for a second time in a row. And you’d love that but you just want to feel him.
You’re moving up the bed and he’s hovering over you kissing your jaw. Your palms meet his ass in a teasing smack.
“Missed this ass.” You smile under him. jungkook just chuckles. you want to add on but his finger stuffing your tight cunt has you silent, gasping for air.
Jungkook smiles down at your pleasure strained face. “mm? not so talkative now?”
He thinks he’s got you. Then you slide down your hand down his abs, he knows where your hand travels and though it’ll destroy his ego, he lets you do it. “so big” you bite your bottom lip as you start stroking him, using your own juices as lubricate. He’s walls are falling. Your hand wrapped around him, has him burying his moans in the croak of your neck.
It’s a competition huh? he loves those second and fucking your cunt first.
You’re stroking him in his pants and he’s pumping his fingers in your cunt. He’s kissing you to hide his moans. It’s a fucking competition and he’s losing. He can’t lose. His hand leaves your cunt to grab at your wrist. You stop. He pulls you away from him. if you went on any longer, he’d be done for and the night wouldn’t end the way he wants. He hasn’t been touched in a year, unless it’s talking about those times you sexted, but it doesn’t count. It feels different when it’s your hands.
“why’d you do that?” you whine.
“If you did that you wouldn’t have gotten the orgasms I have left for you.” You don’t respond. you won’t argue, you do want them.
His fingers are back to pumping and even sooner than before your climax approaches. He wishes he could count just how much you flutter around his finger but he’s too busy looking at your face, pleasure written all over it. and its pride that fills him, knowing he’s the one giving it to you.
Jungkook moves away and you watch how he licks his fingers clean. The way he smiles at you after, is disgustingly hot.
“Take off your pants.” You tell him.
“You take off your shirt.” He reciprocates, you’d forgotten you’d even been wearing anything.
Jungkook is spoiled by the sight before him, your chest sprawled out for him to taste. So, he leans down and wraps his tongue around a nipple. His hand lost at the other side. You love all the foreplay, really, but you want him. you’ve been thinking about it for forever.
“Jungkook.” You call. He hums saying you have his attention. “I want you.”
There’s nothing more he wants.
“Want you too baby.” He says grabbing his cock and aligning it with your entrance. Then he remembers.
“fuck” he whispers. You sit up and wander what has him holding back.
“what?”
“I don’t have a condom.” He knows he doesn’t have one, it’d be weird, it’s not like he was coming on this trip expecting to fuck you.
“Why?” he stares at you confused.
“I didn’t expect fucking to be on the itinerary.”
Oh yeah, you laugh at himself.
“Do you?”
“Nope. Why would I have them.” He just shrugs his shoulders.
He’s gonna lose it. “Are you on the pill?” it’s his only option.
That’s when you shake your head. “Got off when we broke up.”
Okay so what is he gonna do, his cock hard and your cunt right in front of him.
“Jungkook come on you can pull out.” You whine pulling him forward.
She shakes his head. “god no. I almost lost my mind from your hand. It’d lose it in your pussy.” You smile, you shouldn’t be laughing cause you won’t be able to fuck. But you just can’t help but smile at the fact that he almost lost himself just from your hand. You’ve got no clue on what to do. You really need to fuck him.
“Wait--” he looks at you. “This is a lover’s cabin.” You say but he waits for you to elaborate and make sense.
“wouldn’t they have condoms in the cupboard or something.” He didn’t think of that.
So, as you stand you walk over to the cupboard roughly open it almost tipping it over. “Bingo!” you celebrate pulling out a long string of condoms. Your saving grace.
You carefully pull out one and toss it to jungkook.
“Relax aren’t they the one’s you usually use,” you say when you see the look on his face. They do look like they’ve just been purchased and placed. He’s so thankful right now. He leans against the head board and you watch how he gracefully he strokes himself and slips it on, your mouth drools but you’re too needy. You’ll do that another day.
“Come ride cow girl.” He welcomes you when he’s all done. You stretch your legs over him, centering yourself. His hands are quick to spread across your ass, landing a light tap.
He helps you centre himself at your entrance. His brows scrunch together when he feels your tight warmth slide down him. he definitely isn’t going to last long, maybe he’ll hold on till you come but after that is not promised.
His hand loosely holds at your throat, just enough to tilt it back slightly and leave wet kisses and marks everywhere on your skin.
You sliding up and down him feels great but he couldn’t help himself but move his fingers to touch your clit. In pure pleasure you’re wrapping your arms around him and kissing him. you love this position, how he nudges at your back, how intimate it feels, the way you’re so close after being so far away. The cold is barely in mind. Jungkook can’t express how much he’s missed you.
You love it.
But what you love more is how he pulls at your hair, just softly. “Love fucking my cock huh?” he asks but you’re unable to answer his hips jutting up into you with great speed. Jungkook could get carried away with the way your boob bounce but he chooses to say focus. “You like that huh?” he smirks but your eyes are closed, the pleasure of his intense strokes taking you out.
“Yeah, love fucking you kook.” You whimper out.
He’s thrusting harder and you’re moaning louder. “you look so pretty taking me baby. Wanna fuck you forever.”
You wish you.
Your body melts into his as you’re coming again, jungkook fucking into you for his own high which follows after yours. When he catches his breath, he’s laying you down and beside you just after throwing the filled condom.
“I’m gonna get the bath started.” He says planting a quick kiss on your shoulder.
You’re too drained to stand so when he’s back to come get you you’re dozing off. “come on baby I’ve got to get you cleaned up.”
You groan. “Then after a I can make you cocoa.”
“I’m so tired kook.” You whine.
“I knowww.” he coos. Next thing you know he’s lifting you, bridal style. “it’s okay I’ve got you.”
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“Hmm. Don’t move.” Jungkook whines when you threaten to stand and start your day. You two have already slept in because of your late-night endeavours.
“I have to kook. We have so much for our day.”
“Ugh! Fine. But first give me your hand.” He demands the action has you confused but you give it to him. when he has it, he’s giving you a billion kisses. “I love you.” He doesn’t think it’s too soon cause—well he doesn’t know it just felt right to say.
“I love you too now let me go.” He makes sure not to unhand you until you say it more ‘meaningfully’ according to him.
---
You and jungkook decided to retry ice skating (you were hell bent on not going skiing.)
As you’re skating jungkook slides to the half wall, after telling you he has to take a call. You shoo him away after telling you’ll be fine alone (for the meantime).
“Any news?” jungkook was nervous when he got the call from Namjoon. This is a very important call from him, it determines what the hell he’s gonna choose. Quit or get transferred.
“Yeah. it’s been approved.” Jungkook is still for a moment.
“Seriously?” it almost feels like a dream.
“Yeah, had to do a lot of convincing but they agreed.” He’s so grateful for Namjoon. He’s gonna miss him. Jungkook looks over to you, gliding not great but better, and you’re smiling this time. So, he’s happy. You’re happy.
“Thank you, man,”
Namjoon smiles, he knows how much this means. “No problem.” The call cuts.
This just seals a lot “kook look out.” He pockets his phone and as he’s turning to you, you slam into him. You haven’t gotten to the knowing how to stop just yet. Maybe next time.
“You okay, baby.” He says holding onto you by your waist
You let out a dramatic breath that has him smiling. “Yeah, but I’m getting kinda tired.” You say out of breath and letting your weight fall into his arms.
“I’m getting hungry too.” You’ve spent a good amount of time ice skating so you decide to leave it for next time.
--
“what’s the plan for tonight.” He asks as you eat.
“Hmm. For the first time I don’t know.” You both laugh. “We could go out for dinner—ohhh the hot tub--.” You forgot about it cause none of you ever wanted to use it, honestly you didn’t even expect the place to have a hot tub.
“I like the sound of that.”
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The steam of the hot tub hovers lazily on the surface of the water. The steam curls around jungkook as his gaze locks on you. Body dry cause you haven’t gotten in yet. You walk onto the deck, the dim but still bright enough lights radiant off your skin, as though the sun has come to pay him a visit at night.
His breath is caught.
The bikini hugs you in all the ways that made his thoughts falter, the curves of your body illuminated by the soft glow of the light. He swallows hard, his mouth dry despite being surround by water. You make him weak, so much that he looks only at you, even though your attention is else were. You try to find a place to hook your towels.
And then you turn around to smile at him in victory of finding a place to hang them. He nods acknowledging but no paying attention.
He leans back slightly, the water lapping at his shoulders as his eyes roam you, mesmerized. There’s some thing unworldly about you, something he can’t quite put into words. It wasn’t just the way you looked, that made him trip for you. It was the way you carried yourself, the way your body swayed as you moved closer to him.
His arms immediately reach out to envelope you. “Enjoying the view?” you tease, your voice relaxing into the tub and his warmth.
The chuckle he releases is low, “you know I am.”
Your giggle like a melody. You wrap your arms around him and he loses his stability for a second before regaining it. “careful.” He murmurs to you, a slow smile spreading across his face. “I might drown.”
“I wouldn’t want that.” you peck his lips.
You relax for a while just taking in the night and each other presence.
Jungkook has been meaning to ask, the question eating at his mind.  “Do you want to go back to Korea with me?” it sounds like a dumb question, you came together so you will be leaving together.
But the double meaning lies within and he’s desperate to know your answer.
“What are you saying?” you coo at him. “Aren’t we already going back together.” You’re talking about the tangible stuff, the tickets, the plane, the flying, even the landing and going home. But he doesn’t mean that.
After pecking your shoulder water sticking to his lips, he explains. “I don’t mean physically.”
You stare down at him eyes softening. “kook” you realize the seriousness of his question. And for a second jungkook senses scepticism. So, he panics.
“If it’s bout my job, I’m working on it.” His voice is quick.
That was a fear of yours, even more that he wouldn’t want to move. Jungkook has thought about it, the move was a rush decision he never spoke to anyone about it to ask their opinion or whatever. And honestly the move didn’t bring him much joy, besides the opportunity to adventure Jeju. But apart from that he was away from his family, his friends and you. Everything that made his life.
“Seriously?” you say more shocked than anything else.
“Yeah, Namjoon called me. My transfer got approved.”
 You gasp the water swashing from your movement. “don’t lie to me”
He laughs. “I’m not.”
“I thought you said getting it approved is hard.” You’re finding this so hard to believe.
“It is, I guess I got lucky.”
You squeal moving in to hug him.
“When did you start all this.” It’s along process so he had to start early.
“Honestly before we broke up. I wanted to surprise you if it got approved. But then-” you shush him from going on further.
“So, what would have you done if it didn’t get approved.” Your tone drops.
Jungkook sighs looking around in thought. “would’ve fucking quit.” it’s funny how easy the idea is for him, former him would have struggled with the question. “I’m tired of being so far from you.”
“Same.” He places a longer and soft kiss on your lips.
“So, you wanna go back with me?” His voice is playful, as he looks up at you through wet lashes.
“Mhm.” You smile, leaning slightly closer to him, your fingertips tracing lazy circles on his shoulder. “I wanna go everywhere with you.”
The words hang in the air for a moment, warm and intimate, as his lips lifts into a small, boyish grin. “We can arrange that.”
Jungkook doesn’t mind being patched to your side like a little purse dog. In fact, the way he leans into you now, his hand slipping around your waist as if it were second nature, says he’d prefer it. His thumb grazes your hip absentmindedly, a small gesture that feels both possessive and endearing.
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“I’m gonna miss it.” you say leaning into Jungkook's shoulder with a pout. You wait patiently for your flight. “Feels like we just started the trip.”
Jungkook reaches over to cup your hand in his. He then interlocks your fingers and brings it to his lips; the action causes you to smile softly. He really likes to do that. It’d never been a trait of his before, so you’re intrigued, to why he does it all of a sudden. “We can come back one day. together.”
“Yeah together.” You reassure. You like this. Like having him with you.
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[3 months later]
“Jimin if you’re gonna wear that to my fucking wedding you’re not coming.” You announce to a jimin too focused on the light blue suit he’s in. in the mirror you can spot his cheeky grin. He’s not gonna wear a freaking light blue suit, it’s not on the colour scheme, plus he doesn’t like how it makes him look.
He turns to look at jungkook who’s standing on his own pedestal looking into the mirror. Touching and teasing at the suit. “Jungkook you’re not gonna let her do that right?.” Jungkook just shrugs his shoulders at jimin. He’s not pleased with the answer. He knew the dude was down bad, but not this down bad. “Bro!”
“she’s the boss.” Jungkook raises his hands in surrender and you smirk in your seat.
“Come on man…standup.” he fists at Jungkook who just laughs. As Jimin is stepping out to get out of the suit (he stayed so long in it you thought he might actually want to wear it.) and get changed, you swat him with a magazine and he’s quick to running out not wanting you to land another hit.
Now alone in the dressing room you walk up to jungkook. You lean your chin on his shoulder, your hands finding there way to his chest. He welcomes them with his own. “You look so handsome.” Your voices hums sweetly by his ear. Jungkook lifts up both of your hands to place soft and warm kisses on them. The action has you blushing red. The ring on your finger and indication of why he liked to do it before. Plus, now, he just enjoys it., it makes you blush and he likes that.
“Mhm.” He hums against your wrists. “You like it?”
“I love it.” You take a hundredth glance at a preview of what he might wear at your wedding. If he chooses it’s what he wants. You love the cut on him. the colour complimenting his skin, and the style shows off his physique, not too much, but not too little. But all the buttons on the vest and shirt are gonna give you some trouble undoing.
Jungkook stares at you completely enamoured at the way you’re looking at it. You should be looking at him like that. “I think you might love the suit more than me.” He turns abruptly causing you to fall into his chest. He catches and keeps you stable with his firm hand on your lower back.
You place one hand on his chest and the other around his neck, bringing you much closer. “I might just.” Your lips could meet easily with how close you are. But you don’t move them and jungkook pouts at how you deny him the opportunity.
“I’m gonna take it off, not gonna let you love it more.” He nudges his nose with yours.
“Take it off.”
“Jeon Yn! I forgot how freaky you are.” You roll your eyes at how he’s already given you his last name, you like the sound of it though. Reminds you of how real this is, you’re not dreaming.
Trying to tease him more you move by his ear to whisper, “Not here though.”
Jungkook is biting his lower lip. “We should hurry then.” he moves to kiss your shoulder, your off-the-shoulder top giving him leeway to kiss your skin directly. He peppers more kisses from your shoulder to your neck before  you get carried away you’re prompting for him to turn around. He does, though reluctantly.
You giggle.
“Do you like it though?” your voice turns serious, as much as you like it and how you just want to see him in it the whole day. If he likes it matters.
“Yeah, it makes me look so…husband.” He smiles boyishly as he winks at you in the mirror.
“Oh-gosh.” You push yourself away from him to get back to your seat. You’re not gonna be here all day.
He turns to face you. Still standing on the pedestal. “When do I get to see you in your dress” His teeth play with his lip ring as he asks curiously. The thought of you in the gown exciting him.
“When I walk down the aisle.” You stare blankly, no room for discussion. And he doesn’t, you’ve been quite stern about him not seeing you in any bridal wear until the wedding. Which he doesn’t mind, he can wait.
“Make sure it’s a ball gown so that I can slip under and hide.” He gestures his hands to elaborate what he means.
You shake your head. It’s not your style, maybe when you were a child, but you’ve grown. “I’m not wearing a ball gown.”
Ditching the jacket, he places it next to you and stands closing your legs between his. He lowers himself so your nose is touching his. His arms trap you between him and the couch. You didn’t think he was not gonna get that kiss right? He kisses you softly, then again. Then a little harder the third time, this one lasting seconds longer. You hold on his waist for stability. He kisses you once more just for the sake.
“I’m very sure you’ll look divine in whatever you pick, baby.”
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A/N: so that's that. I hope I've fixed your broken heart from I-redo. there are scenes that i couldn't fit in. Yes of course there are other activities they did, but if i wrote it all it would be boring and too long and would probably be pushed to next month. i wish i could've written more fluff but idk.
i will allow for story drabble request if you guys want that.
but yeah thanks, for reading, liking and commenting. much love. wishing you a happy new year.
story idea copyright of keen-li, 30.12.24
1K notes · View notes
readychilledwine · 3 months ago
Text
Heartbeat
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Summary - One bed doesn't work well for 3 illyrians and their mate.
Warnings - Azriel's slutty sweatpants, mentions of wing clipping but nothing graphic, swearing
A/n - Anyone else wonder how any quad would handle a one bed situation?
Written for @polysjmweek day three: Will there be enough room?
SJM Poly+ Week Masterlist
Master Masterlist
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“Oh you have got to be shitting me,” Azriel grumbled. “Rhys, you were supposed to ask for 2 beds.”
“I did,” The High Lord pulled off the hood that did nothing to disguise him, prompting a giggle from you and Cassian. The look of annoyance he gave the two of you had you hiding your face in Cassian's chest. “I suppose you two think this is very funny.”
“Very,” Cassian chuckled. “Azriel is acting like the 4 of us haven't been sharing a bed for, what, 200 years?” Cassian's hands guided you into the room, setting your bag down. “Go bathe first.”
216 years, you would never correct Cassian, and they still ensured you showered first in these situations. It wasn't the first time you four found yourselves in a rundown inn seeking shelter after a rough mission. It wouldn't be the last either. Peeling off the sweat and dirt-caked clothing made your skin crawl. You four had been hunting Illyrians that had crossed Rhysand for the last time. Your husband was tired of the clippings and the fighting.
All three of your husbands were, actually.
It had started with you and Cassian. The bond had snapped when he saw you on the Summer Court's pleasure barge, per his banishment from your home. He had introduced you to Azriel a few days later, the fight between them now being the cause of the infamous sand castle collapse that shook the Summer Court. Not wanting to live without them, you left when they did, arriving at the Night Court and causing another fight the second you laid eyes on Rhysand. The four of you worked hard to make the dynamic flow, but once it fell into place, the three of them all admitted their lives and connection made so much more sense.
“Do you need help, sweetheart,” a purr made you pause, hands moving away from the corset you wore for extra protection. Rhysand began to work on the ties. “We are attempting to figure out the bed situation,” his voice was slightly annoyed. “With two males with wings-”
“Baby, I can sleep on the floor,” you offered.
“Over my dead body,” his eyes met yours in the mirror. “If we move the bed to the center of the room, we can have Azriel and Cassian take the outsides-”
“And squish you in the middle with me on the floor,” your voice was meant to be firm, but the relief as he finally finished unlacing your corset made it more of a relaxed sigh. “You can't handle sleeping on floors or the couch. your knees will get stiff, and then you will become grumpy.”
He nipped at your ear playfully, “I do not get grumpy.” He walked with you toward the tub, arms around your waist as he hugged you from behind. He kept you practically glued to him, turning the faucet on, “I fear the water won't get warm.”
“It's okay. One cold bath won't kill me,” your fingers traced his forearm tattoos. “We get to go home tomorrow, right?”
He nodded, “Azriel found and took care of the last group while you and Cassian were doing whatever you two were doing.”
You leaned back to narrow your eyes, “Very serious mission things.” A lie, and Rhysand knew, but he wouldn't push it. “We were critical to the success of this operation.” Not a lie.
A dark brown lifted as his smirk began to form. “I will pretend I didn't just see a flash of what you two were doing in the woods today. Bathe while I get the bed figured out.” He left after smacking your ass, laughing as he did.
You sunk into the water, the harsh drag of wood on wood outside the door. The rules of your missions typically involved bathing quickly so you could all wash up, but with the water cold, there was little reason not to soak longer than you normally would. Once you were chilled to the bones, you stepped out and drained the tub, cringing at the sight of the dirty water.
A real bath, preferably with 3 sets of hands helping you, would be a must once you were back in Velaris. You wrapped yourself in the towel, walking out to where Azriel was situating things. “And where did the other two go?”
“They claim food,” he murmured. “Rhysand said the water is cold.” His hand reached for your hair, twisting a lock. “Are you cold?”
“A bit.”
“Start a fire if you'd like,” the tone of his voice was soft and almost musical, as it always was when he relaxed. His lips were warm on your forehead as he went to bathe, leaving you to try to heat the cold room with the small hearth. You studied the bed once you had it going, changing into your last clean pair of leggings and finding one of Cassian's shirts to wear.
There was no possible way all four of you would fit. Your bed in Velaris was custom-made, allowing all three males to stretch out their wings. That wouldn't be possible here. Rhysand would have to keep his tucked in with his magic, Azriel and Cassian would have to let theirs rest on the floor.
You had a plan. One they'd hate. You grabbed a blanket from the corner of the room and a pillow and laid in front of the fireplace. They'd believe you fell asleep warming your skin back up and hopefully, they'd let you sleep there. Maybe that would allow the three of them some sort of comfort. You shut your eyes, the warmth so enjoyable it lulled your mind into relaxing.
Cassian and Rhysand walked back into the room, Cassian quick to notice your form curled up under a blanket. “We should have just pushed and flew her home,” he told Rhysand. He kneeled down next to you, waving the questionable soup in front of your nose. Your tummy grumbled, forcing you to open your eyes from the sleepy state. “Eat.”
You took the bowl, sitting up to see Azriel coming out and Cassian motioning for Rhysand to go in. Azriel's sleeping pants hung loose on his hips as he grabbed a bowl as well. His waist looked fsr more interesting than the grey and clumpy soup, but you resisted the temptation. “Like bathing in a damned river,” he muttered to Cassian. “What are you doing on the floor,” he glanced at you.
“Sleeping,” your face, as you took a spoonful of soup, made both males pause.
“Can't be picky, sweetheart,” Azriel said softly. “Picky starves.”
“I know.”
Rhysand took the fastest bath you think he'd ever done, shivering as he walked back out in his towel and began to change. He said nothing as he took his first bite of food, nor did Azriel. Cassian had got to take his turn by the time you looked up. Once he was back, his own pants did not rest as low as Azriel's. He glanced at you. “That is my shirt,” his face was bright as he took you in, the material hanging almost drowning you in it. “But yes, you can wear it.”
All eyes were on that single bed. Rhysand appeared to be calculating the space, as if he could ensure his little plan would work. You laid back on the floor, stretching and then curling back to the fireplace. Wordlessly defiance was something you specialized in, but the three of them weren't stupid, and it didn't take them long to begin situating.
Azriel wanted the spot that'd allow him to lay facing the door, always on high alert when your little pack found itself away from home. Cassian took the side that allowed him to face the window, another watchful eye to where any threats may come. Rhysand was forced between them, a silent conversation before Cassian walked over and picked you up.
That's how you found yourself laying on Rhysand. One of his arms held your hips as the other moved to cup the back of your head. One wing rested on the two of you like a weighted blanket, then another. “Go to sleep,” Rhysand whispered to you. “You may not realize this, but you are trapped.” There was no response from you, no argument. The soft sound of your breathing was the only thing coming from you as you laid on what would now Be your favorite bed.
“Next time, we will fly home,” Azriel stated.
Cassian immediately agreed, “This isn't fair to y/n.” They both glanced at Rhysand when he didn't respond, only to find him asleep. “Or maybe it wasn't fair to us,” Cassian added.
“Thinking it definitely wasn't fair to us,” Azriel chuckled. “He worked this to his advantage.”
“He always does,” Cassian said. His voice was getting deeper and slower. “Always does.” It did not take long for the two of them to fall asleep, the room filled with nothing but the sounds of a dying hearth and four hearts beating in sync.
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confused-squishy · 5 months ago
Text
You guys know what time it is
DPxDC Time
Okay, so de-aged Danny is captured by GIW when he meets the Batfamily. I'm talking, Oracle comes across the guys in white and informs the Batfam who uncover EVERYTHING.
~
I know what you're all thinking. Danny is perfect bat adoption bait. But it's not Batman that catches de-aged Danny's attention. It's the big bad wolf, Jason "Red Hood" Todd. Danny sees Jason through the test tub or cage he's been trapped in and can almost feel the pain Jason has felt through his life.
So when Danny is released from his "prison" he doesn't want Batman to hold him. He doesn't want Nightwing to hold him. He definitely doesn't want to be held by the Robin's who are staring at him like he's something to be stabbed or examined. No. He wants the one who looks sympathetic and looks like he knows how Danny is feeling at that moment.
Danny ignore everyone and holds his short arms out towards Jason. Silencing everyone as they stare. Danny didn't look away from those pain filled eyes. Danny knows his eyes must reflect the same way from how quickly Jason scoops him up. Once he's in Jason's arms it's like the Dam gate had broken completely.
Danny cried. He let the tears go. The tears for his parents who even if they didn't like ghosts still love him dearly. The tears for his sister Jazz who not only raised and protected him, but gave her everything to help him when he needed it. He cried for Sam and Tucker. His best friends who like his family, died trying to save him. Died protecting him from the GIW who didn't care for innocent lives.
~
Jason held the glowing child protectively in his arms. He could see how much pain was trapped behind those gates. He knew whatever this kid had been through was worse then any of the bat family had been in combined. He didn't move from his spot.
Jason barely acknowledged when Dick had tapped his shoulder to show him the tag from where the child had been imprisoned. It read "Phantom-001". But Jason knew that wasn't the child's name. It was like something inside him had clicked when he saw those glowing green eyes.
Something inside him warmed as he gently calmed the crying child. No this was his child now. He was going to protect him and keep him happy. Happy and safe from everything this world will try to put on his son's shoulders.
Jason slightly tightened his hold as he felt the steady breathing against his chest. He moved slowly as to not interrupt the much needed sleep. Leaving the room for his family to search and ultimately destroy. He knew if he stayed in that room he'd blow it up.
Seeing those machines and jars filled with that familiar green terrified him. Not from his past. But from the scars on his new son. He wasn't a fool. He could put the pictures together and he really didn't like what the picture was coming out to look like. Jason carefully made his way outside and stared at the sky making a silent promise that he will never break.
"I'll destroy those who did this to you. I'll make them regret everything and more."
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cameronsbabydoll · 1 month ago
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I’ve been on a military Rafe high omg.. he’s so hot and big but also very quiet and sweet #needthat
When Rafe is home, how is the housework broken up? Ik reader is a SAHM, but I think that Rafe misses her and the baby so much he’s just around helping reader with all of her tasks.
His military brain prolly locks tf in for laundry day.
Maybe he’s on diaper duty? Ik he’s super traditional in a lot of ways but I also think that he takes pride in being hands on at home bc he’s actively taking care of his family
oh you get it—military!rafe is so traditional in mindset (provider, protector, head of the house), but the moment he’s home? he’s hands-on, fully locked in, and doesn’t want to miss a second of family life.
– laundry day is like a mission.
rafe treats it like a tactical op. “we sort by category and color, darlin’.” folds everything with clean, crisp corners. your bras? stacked like gear. baby onesies? sorted by size. he doesn't half-ass anything.
– diaper duty king.
he missed so much while deployed—so the second he’s back, he’s on it. wipes tucked into the crook of his arm like a holster, changes those diapers like he’s disarming a bomb. he’ll even hum while doing it, proud as hell when the baby giggles.
“you see that? didn’t even get shit on me this time.”
– kitchen time = couple’s time.
he insists on helping with dinner, even if he’s just slicing vegetables or stirring whatever you’ve got going. sometimes it’s an excuse to keep a hand on your lower back or kiss your cheek while you cook, whispering, “missed watchin’ you do this, baby.”
– bath time for baby is sacred.
it’s a nightly thing. he loves it. kneels by the tub, sleeves rolled up, and gives your little one the gentlest scrub-down. makes bubble mohawks. uses the ducky voice.
– gets up early to start your day for you.
coffee brewed. bottles washed. sometimes breakfast made. he’ll let you sleep in when he can—because in his mind, you hold the fort down when he’s gone, and he wants to show up for you when he’s home.
– super territorial about trash + heavy lifting.
you’re not taking out a damn garbage bag while he’s under the same roof. “you carried our baby for nine months, i got this,” he grunts, already on his way out the door.
– makes tidying a game with the baby.
he’ll put them in the laundry basket and wheel them around while you all pick up toys. "operation clean-up, lil soldier. let’s move.”
yes, he’s traditional. yes, he’s protective. but nothing matters more to him than showing up for the people he loves. and the truth is—he’s more of a homebody than he’ll ever admit.
he doesn’t just want a housewife.
he wants his wife.
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