#already might have gotten spoiled as to the context of this song and if she's who i think she was in the trailer pray for me pls

[theinfinitedivides]

'masoom dil hai mera, isse tod diya jaaye… hayeeee, masoom dil hai mera, isse tod diya jaaye, rishta ghamon se mera… haye raam, rishta ghamon se mera, ab jod diya jaaye, jod diya jaaye...' — masoom dil hai mera | heeramandi, 2024, dir. sanjay leela bhansali.

[purplesurveys]

962

Do you have a pair of Beat headphones? I used to have a pair. I mean it’s still around in my closet, but it’s completely broken now with the cable all given out and the cushion for the left ear has been missing for a while. I just don’t have the heart to throw it out because it was my absolute favorite pair of headphones that gave me good memories during a particularly shitty time in high school.

How was your week? A little better. I’ve gotten into the groove at work so I’m no longer shy when it comes to asking questions and giving inputs, and I’ve gained a better grasp of the workplace’s dynamic so it’s also been easier to communicate with people. Heavy life stuff is still around and it won’t be leaving for a while, but they were easier to ignore this week.

Are any of your electronics not working properly at the moment? Not really, but my phone’s charger cable recently stopped working. I have a backup that I’m using at the moment and while it’s able to charge my phone, it’s starting to fray and I’m not feeling too good about the wires that I’m starting to see hahaha. I just don’t know how to take care of my cables, guys. Anyway, this question made me paranoid so I took a few minutes to wrap a shit ton of electrical tape on the frayed area so I think it’s all good for now.

Are you excited to pick out your wedding dress one day? I like thinking about my wedding but I truthfully dread the wedding gown part. I’ve never been able to decide what look and style suits me best and I’ve just never been good at determining things like that. I like to imagine that I’d leave that bit to whoever my maid of honor will be, because I’d definitely prize a second opinion more than my own.

When was the last time you felt relieved? Yesterday, 6 PM when I exited the last Google Meet for the day. It was a Friday night and it meant my work week was over :)) I mean I love what I do, but Friday nights will always hit differently.

Does it bother you when an artist remakes a song that one has previously done? I wouldn’t say it bothers me but covers are definitely a hit or miss for me, with way more misses than hits. Nothing wrong with acts putting their own spin on an already existing song, but I’m personally the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” type when it comes to music.

What brand of chapstick do you use? I don’t use any mainly because I’m bound to lose them within a week. Same goes for other care products.

Do you really think someone could be perfect? No. Everyone has their flaws and that should be okay to acknowledge.

When was the last time you cried? Wednesday, I think. It’s been three days! I’d count that as an achievement. But idk, my sadness comes in waves so I shouldn’t be celebrating too early. I’m sure I’ll feel a pang soon and be crying again over the weekend.

What’s a food that you like every once in awhile but not often? Cake. Too sweet and rich; I wouldn’t enjoy eating it every day. What letter is the song you’re listening to under? Not listening to music, but I have a YouTube video on.

Would you rather visit the 60s or 70s? 60s would be the lesser evil, I guess. I would NOT want to live through Martial Law in the 70s...I originally wasn’t even going to go with 60s because I think the world was a bit chaotic at the time, but I think my country was mostly unaffected by the political/cultural things happening then so it’s whatever.

Are you the type of person that enjoys getting hugs? I don’t actively seek them out but it feels nice when someone likes me enough to extend their arms out to me for a hug. I haven’t been hugged for a while and I feel kinda empty.

Do your socks say anything on them? I think some of my socks have the brand name on them but that’s it.

Name a TV channel that only has three letters in it. AMC.

Have you found out who your true friends are? For now, yes.

Gray or Grey? I use both spellings for no particular context. I simply like changing it up lol.

Will you be buying concert tickets any time soon? LOL of course not. And I’m very picky when it comes to concerts that I choose to attend anyway, so I doubt I would’ve bought any tickets in the last six months even without Covid unless it was for Paramore or Beyoncé.

Have you seen the movie The Perks of Being a Wallflower? Did you like it? Nope, but everyone was hyping that movie up when it came out. It never really looked like my thing < Yeah pretty much. I feel like it’s such a teenage-y movie so I was never drawn to it. I also think it would be too triggering for my depression, so I’ve felt wary about checking both book and movie out.

Is there something you’d fall apart if you didn’t have? One of my biggest fears is to end up alone, so I always have to have some form of a support system to fall back into. I would be very lost if I didn’t have at least one person to rely on.

How many weddings have you been to? I can think of four off the top of my head. I was either a flower girl or a junior bridesmaid for all of those.

When you smile, are you confident? Most times I am; I like to smile. But sometimes I smile just to fake it and avoid any questions.

Have you ever not done something because you were afraid of getting in trouble? Yesss, all the time. I’ve always been all about following the rules and I’ve never seen the appeal in breaking them. That makes me sound boring but at least I’ve never gotten in serious trouble lol.

Was the weather beautiful today? For me it is, but only because I like the rain and cloudy weather. Others might find it bleak and sad, but I feel right at home.

Do you have to have a fan on when you sleep? Yeah, all year long.

Would you rather have an orange, red or gray bedroom? If I had my dream modern/brutalist home, grey would be soooo fucking perfect for the bedroom. 

Would you ever dye part of your hair blue? I’m open to it, but I don’t think it’ll be a good match for my black hair as both are darker shades as it is. If I could dye my hair I’d pick lighter colors like green or even go all the way to blonde.

Have you ever gone to a private school? Yeah, from kindergarten all the way to high school. Private schools here typically give a better quality of education and they don’t give off the for-lazy-spoiled-kids vibe that I always hear from private schools in other countries, which makes them the norm for middle and upper-middle class families.

Is Finding Nemo a favorite movie of yours? I have other favorite animated movies, but that doesn’t stop me from loving Finding Nemo. :) I would always tune in for the whole thing if it were on.

Does/Did your school have a uniform? I had to wear one in my first school, but I didn’t need one for college.

Turn on the TV. What channel are you on? No TV where I am. I think my parents are watching a movie on their TV, but it’s on Netflix rather than a channel.

Does your house have security cameras? It does not.

Does a popsicle sound good right now? Eh, I guess it sounds fine but I’d rather have a pint of ice cream. I think that fits better with the weather and the mood that I’m in today.

What’s your favorite exercise workout? My weight training class last year was a lot of fun. I always felt dead after every session haha but I definitely felt healthier. I wish the semester had gone on longer just for that one class.

What’s your favorite thing to do? Lol I love doing many different things < Same lmao this question is so vague??? My favorite thing to do these days is binge-watch Rhett and Link content, but I like doing so many other things too.

What did you do for your 17th birthday? I was with Gabie that day and we went to a local art museum, as well as to a restaurant that she had wanted to take me to.

Does your local Walmart have benches in them to rest? We don’t have Walmarts.

Was your favorite stuffed animal really a teddy bear growing up? I never had stuffed animals. Well I was given a few of them as gifts, but I was never into them and they always ended up being owned by my sister.

If your house was haunted, what would you do? Not even think about it. Just show them that I couldn’t care less, lol.

Are you good at swimming? I can do a few strokes and am pretty good at treading, but I'm prone to panic-kicking when I can tell that the water is too deep.

What’s worse: Slow internet or slow walkers? Slow internet is such a pain in the ass. Shouldn’t even have to be an issue in 2020 anymore.

What is the rudest thing a guy has ever done to you? Cat-called, whistled at, winked at, lunged at. One good thing about this lockdown is that I haven’t had to deal with men as much as I used to. Do you sleep with the sheets tucked in or out? Well I only have one layer of bedsheet and it’s the one that covers up the mattress, so it’s tucked in by default. I have a blanket to cover me up when I’m cold.

What do you do to fall asleep faster? I find a few videos to watch as that tends to make me feel sleepy the quickest.

Do you carry a bottle of water wherever you go? I used to have a tumbler/water bottle in college but I forgot it at the gym one day and when I came back for it, somebody already stole it :( It was such a handy water bottle because it kept my water cold all day, so it sucks that I lost it. I’m planning to buy the same model again soon.

Are you afraid that one day you might get cancer? It doesn’t really run in my family save for one grand-aunt who had cancer, so I’m not too worried. But I’ve accepted the fact that it is at least a possibility.

Are you a fast or slow walker? I like being in the middle. Slow walkers are annoying so I try not to be one, and walking fast just reminds me of my mom and how quickly she walks at malls when she’s supposed to be spending time with her family lol.

Do you usually have to wear a belt with your pants? No. They all fit me just fine.

Does it bother you when people’s underwear hangs out? Eghhh, it really does. I know it shouldn’t but it really does. I just feel like it’s so invasive and it gives me a lot of secondhand embarassment.

Are you usually the person to try new things with your hair? Not really. I like staying safe with my hair. The most daring thing I’ve done with it is get bangs tbh, and I don’t plan on going any further than that.

When’s your birthday? April 21st.

What age do you look forward to reaching? I don’t feel that way about any age. Whenever I reach ultimate satisfaction and security will be a good enough age for me.

Name a state that begins with the letter M. Minnesota.

What’s the first thing you do after a car accident? Think about how to tell my parents. D:

What do you use to get rid of bad breath? Brush my teeth, drink water.

What exercise do you hate the most? Pull-ups.

What do you do at a party? Drink, socialize, tell stories, eat allllllll the food ha.

[purrincess-chat]

Number 8 for the 40 questions, please 😊

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

Oh dear, my favorite?? Ohhhh, let me go look.

Okay, can I do like a top 5 or something?

From Moves Like Jagged CH2:

“How did you get a piano here?” She asked, and Jagged glanced at it nonchalantly.

“I know a guy.” He shrugged. “You’re worrying too much, Marinette. I’ve been working all day on this song, and there’s no way he’ll be able to refuse you.”

“Look, Jagged, I’m not sure if tonight is the best time to- What are you doing?” She flinched as he hurled a pebble at Adrien’s window.

“Haven’t you seen all the movies? We have to get his attention.” He stated simply with an impish grin. “Would you like to throw one?”

“No, I would not!” She hissed, glancing nervously up at the window.

“Suit yourself.” He shrugged before tossing another one.

“Jagged!” She caught his wrist before he could throw the next one.

How did she get herself into these situations? Standing outside the love of her life’s window in the middle of the night with a famous rockstar, who had her phone number she might add, who was hell-bent on setting them up, and while she appreciated the gesture, she was absolutely mortified by the reality. Why did life pick her for all of its craziness? Wasn’t being a superheroine enough?

“Shh, here he comes,” He said, rubbing his hands together excitedly and taking his seat at the piano and beginning to pluck out a soft melody.

Adrien peeked out his window with furrowed brows that raised in alarm when he saw the piano and Jagged Stone. Marinette offered him a sheepish wave, and he clicked a button on his remote that opened the pane outward.

“Jagged Stone?” He gaped with a small smile. “Marinette, what’s going on? And how did you guys get a piano out here?”

“I know a guy!” Jagged called with a grin, and Marinette’s face fell into her hand.

This fic in general is super fun to write, and this is why I want to get back to it soon because Jagged is just so wild, and I love it. “I know a guy!” It just makes me laugh every time, like, Jagged, boy XD

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From Moves Liked Jagged CH3: (god this fic has good lines)

“You wanted to see me, Mr. Damocles?” Adrien announced, knocking on the door as he entered.

“Yeah, come in and sit. I want to have a little chat.”

Adrien gulped, letting the door shut behind him as he stepped inside and took a seat. His fingers drummed on the arm of the chair until the chair spun around, and he found himself face-to-face with Jagged Stone.

“No way! But you’re not-” Jagged held up a hand, a smirk curling on his lips.

“Yeah, yeah, I know who I am,” He said, leaning back and propping his feet up on the desk. “You and I need to have a little chat.”

“Wait, so I’m not in trouble, am I?” Adrien’s eyebrows creased, and Jagged shrugged. “What do you want to talk to me about?”

“I wanna talk to you one-on-one, man-to-man, rockstar-to-whatever it is you do with the perfume ads.” He waved it away.

I’ve always been really proud of that last line. I fear that when I come back to this fic I won’t be able to capture Jagged’s essence as well as I did initially, and I fear that it won’t be as funny. Cause a lot of Jagged’s lines in this fic are hilarious. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Not really a dialogue clip, but just a clip that makes me laugh every time I read it

From Lady Luck CH2:

For a moment, she thought he hadn’t noticed her presence as he hadn’t made eye contact or even so much as looked at her since he walked in, but the moment he stepped onto the platform and let his robe fall to his feet, he turned to face her head on, a small triumphant smile on his lips when his eyes locked with hers. She felt her face heat up instantly and averted her gaze as a few classmates giggled in delight.

“Ready?” Mr. Rousseau asked.

“Yeah,” Adrien replied, placing a hand on his hip as those green eyes remained locked on target.

“You have two hours, class. Make every second count.”

Adrien Agreste better be counting his seconds because the number he had left was dwindling. With a soft groan, she picked up her sketchbook and went to work, starting with the head and trying her very hardest to keep her eyes north of the border. He was an excellent example of male physique, and she hated herself for even admitting it in her mind. Every inch of him was physical perfection, and as she was inevitably forced to discover, she did mean every inch.

She was convinced this was some method of torture because every time she glanced up she was faced with toned abs, perfect skin, dazzling green eyes, as well as a certain other body part she was doing her best not to think about too much which was, incidentally, the thing she was reserving for last. Each time he caught her gaze, a tiny smile curled at the corner of his lips, and her eyes darted back to her drawing.

All that she had left was the particular region she’d been refusing to look at the whole time, though given his position in front of her, it was hard to miss. She wondered if Mr. Rousseau would protest if she refused to draw it. After all, she already had one big dick on her page, she wasn’t certain why she’d need two.

Okay, so it’s mostly just that last sentence, but you needed some context for the scene first lol. Again, not really dialogue, but I just really love the “she already had one big dick on her page, she wasn’t certain why she’d need two.” This fic was another one that was super fun to work on which is why I went back and read over it again when I was considering what I wanted to work on. I read back over a lot of my old writing, and I feel like to some extent it’s better than what I write now which is a shame because my older works have gained way less views than my newer ones. I just feel like some of my turns of phrase are better at times in my older stuff, and Idk if I’ve just gotten lazy, or if I’m just not as funny anymore. Probably a little of both XD

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So this one is actually old and now obsolete, at least maybe until I figure out what I want to do with this story, but this comes from the bonus stories I wrote for Lady du Coeur way, way, waaay back, and this was an alternate scene from Marinette’s perspective from one of the chapters:

“Wake up!” A demanding, scratchy voice ordered, and Marinette sat up, rubbing her eyes in confusion. She glanced up at Adrien’s kwami floating just above her, eyebrows furrowing slightly.

“Where are we?” She glanced around, but there was nothing but blackness as far as she could see.

“You’re dead. Adrien poisoned you,” Plagg replied spookily, and Mari gave him an unamused glare. “Fine, Adrien got these two magical cups from Master Fu hoping to make the two of you forget that you knew each other under the mask, but long story short, Master Fu lied and now I’m here to show you all of his deepest and most embarrassing secrets as revenge for not listening to me.”

“Why?” Her eyes narrowed skeptically.

“Why what?” Plagg grunted. “Why did Adrien let you drink tea from magical memory cups? Because he’s stupid. Why did Master Fu lie to him? Again, because he’s stupid and needs to be taught a lesson. Why am I going to show you all his secrets? Because it’s fun. Oh, and he’s stupid.”

Really that whole chapter is funny just for Plagg’s commentary on Adrien’s life alone. Looking back he’s kind of harsh, but given the context of the scene the roasting is kind of deserved. Maybe one day I’ll figure out what I want to do with this fic and it will come home from the war. Maybe. Someday. 

Dammit I need a 5th one shit fuck

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From the unfinished chapter of WYBM(F)L?

"Well, well, look what the cat dragged in," Lila said, cocking a hip as Marinette approached with a cutting glare.

"What poor soul did you lie to in order to be let in?"

Honestly this whole exchange with Lila is peak pettiness to me. I’m not spoiling anymore than that, but Marinette gets in a few good quips. 

But there you have it. Most of the time when people ask for my favorite lines I’ve written, I gravitate toward Moves Like Jagged and that scene in Lady Luck. I’m sorry to tell all of you that my writing peaked two years ago. 

[janiedean]

So, because I'm weird I used to read the last line of any book I bought. Bad habit. I know. It was just the last line. It wasn't going to spoil me anything. Right? Wrong. I went to the shop and read the last line of the seventh Dark Tower book when it was released while I was still reading Susannah's Song. That cured me of the habit. Do you remember that line? What did you think of it? it's hit and miss with King's endings, but I quite liked this one.

....................... HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHA ha ha ha. okay. buckle up because we’re getting into The Topic Of The Century Ie My Hateboner For The Ending of VII Even If I Don’t Dislike That Line. under the cut in case.

so, thing is, the loop theory was a thing that most ppl thought was possible back in the day and I also used to lurk on the now defunct dt.net forums where people were theorizing all the time so I did get into VII thinking that might be the ending line BUT problem: as I had read insomnia in preparation for the DT, I had figured it would line up with stuff that happened in that book where the kid had the vision with roland and another younger guy at the tower, so I had gotten myself into theorizing that roland got there with either jake or eddie most likely jake, died into the field of roses and the gunslinger following flagg might not have been him, and I really liked my own damned theory, which... means... that I obv. got disappointed that it didn’t go like that BUUUUTTT here we go into the problem I have with the ending as in:

I thought everything post eddie’s death didn’t make sense and susannah’s characterization was all over the place and honestly I got a lot of things but the idea that she didn’t go with roland to the tower just irked me to no end esp. bc she swore eddie that she would but nvm

king utterly ignored 90% of the stuff he did with insomnia and he just stuck patrick at the end because he had to be there but it wasn’t lining up with what was in the actual original book and just WHY

also the way the crimson king died was... I mean idk what editor didn’t ask stephen WHAT THE HELL HE WAS THINKING but if he was going for underwhelming villains to send a message it was.. a bad message bc it just made me go like I DIDN’T GET ALL THE WAY HERE FOR THIS

anyway then there’s the part where I thoroughly, utterly and absolutely detest the first ending (the susannah one) because a) THAT DAMNED TROPE WHERE EVERYONE FORGETS EVERYTHING JESUS KING WHY DO YOU LIKE IT IT ERASES CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT I HATE IT, b) she’s not gone with actual jake and eddie, those two are doubles from another world/twinners so like.... wow those two died and fuck them and she got the happy ending with the similarbutnotexactsame version? I mean they’re not the people I cried my eyes out for I’m not considering that their happy ending, c) ... so even if that was the message it means that whatever they had with roland was only worth for one loop and then bye? yeah sorry nope I don’t buy that

now, given the above, I didn’t mind the ending that much bc I thought the loop thing was actually smart, but good lord roland forgetting everything for the what TWENTIETH TIME was the cruelest thing I’ve ever seen done to a fictional character ever and just IMPLYING that this might be the last time was... like... king that’s not gonna cut it sorry

so I hc-ed that eddie and jake actually are with roland in all the loops and it’s the other person who is in for the ride and he’s going to draw them again which was actually not too clownish bc at some point in 5 eddie def. had deja vu ie I ALREADY HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE and that’s the only way I can have peace with that ending because otherwise it’s too bleak and I can’t even, regardless of how much sk thinks it’s not bleak.

but as an ending line itself it was badass ;) ;) ;) I just wish I... appreciated... the context and that he hadn’t killed off flagg that early just to not do shit with him and have that anticlimactic thing at the end sdlkjgjksd 

[marvelandponder]

I’M SCREAMING

We’re 3 months away from this glitter-bomb and they gave us some stuff to scream about. I think I’ll do just that. I took my sweet time putting this together, I know, but there’s a fair bit to unpack and a lot to be excited about so, let’s go through it all!

Animation

Okay, so first things first: people are calling this a 2D movie and that’s not really that accurate.

It certainly has some 2D elements, like the backgrounds, but the style of animation only makes the characters look 2D, when in fact they’re 3D models.

You can tell in how they move. If I were to give you a still screen shot, you might guess that it was from a 2D animation, but in motion, you can tell what it actually is: cel-shading.

I had a hunch that’s what it was so I asked a storyboarder who worked on the MLP movie (and the show) if I was right and she said: 

The program they’re using is ToonBoom, which does rigs with 2D toon shaders, among other things!

You know, I don’t often call things, but I fucking called it. Let me have this. Just to give you a quick definition from Wikipedia:

“Cel shading or toon shading is a type of non-photorealistic rendering designed to make 3-D computer graphics appear to be flat by using less shading color instead of a shade gradient or tints and shades.”

3-dimensional figure with cel shading, has the effect of making it  look 2D. Typically seen with thick outlines on the outside and little to no outlines on the inside:

(Team Fortress 2 itself isn’t normally cel shaded, but that’s a great example a fan made of what cel shading usually looked like when I was growing up)

Cel shading without outlines, as seen in Wind Waker. 

Like I said, just seeing this still image, it looks 2D, but watching it move, you can tell there’s a 3rd dimension to the character with the features and lineart mapped out onto the models to make it look 2D

Which by the way, is really unique for a major release! I don’t know about anyone else, but I was excited that MLP: The Movie seemed to be 2-D since there hasn’t been a domestic 2-D animated movie since Winnie the Pooh in 2011. 6 damn years! While I maybe would’ve ideally liked a completely 2-D animated movie, the backgrounds and the cel shading works in really neat ways, and it will definitely make the movie stand out 

The purely 3-D objects seem unfinished at the moment (but that’s not out of the ordinary, CGI seems to be one of the last processes). It needs texture or shading or something, and I can tell because most of the ship looks too soft (too much like a model) to be metal. I really think this will be fixed for the final product, but that’s probably the most jarring part of the style at the moment

Not all of the 3-D looks unfinished, but the best looking parts are still the painterly, 2-D stuff (look at those towers; they’re really stylized, but you can tell they’re 3D in a more 2D environment)

THAT DIGITALLY PAINTED VERSION OF CANTERLOT THOUGH:

The light effects are definitely 3-D in the fireworks and rainboom

Oh, and speaking lighting, so much of it looks so pretty! There are one or two times when the colours are slightly off, but the majority of the time it looks freaking gorgeous

You can kinda see by looking at Rarity that the shading is juuust slightly off here (kinda like they were for the teaser trailer), but then you look in the background and see this BEAUTIFUL background and Twilight all upset and worried about this invasion, and it feels like such a nitpick to worry about what will probably still be cleaned up before it hits theaters

We also get some really great expressions, so they’re not really limited by the 3D models underneath (if I’m right about that)

Also, just as one last little note here, the style is detailed enough to see little things about the characters we didn’t know up until now, like the fact that the spines on the side of Spike’s head are translucent, or that the colours of RD’s mane aren’t 100% perfectly separated

Overall with the animation, I’m so impressed not only by how gorgeous it is,but by how willing they were to take a risk and incorporate a 3D element in the form of  (I think) cel-shading. This only really matches the creative spirit of the MLP team, though. Whether or not you agree on how well they always execute everything, they always try to step up their game with every new season and push themselves to be and do better.

And while I will say that if some of the more 3D parts (yeah, I’m talking about the zeppelin/airships mostly) aren’t fixed for the final release, I would have a bone to pick with them, but I have faith that we’ll be seeing a much smoother integration of that 3D on the big screen.

Story and Character Details

I really appreciate that they didn’t outright spoil anything too big. It’s definitely a well-cut trailer! We basically only know about the same information we did before, with just a hint or two as to things like who the true villain is.

Just based on the focus given to these characters in the trailer (and what I know of the Storm King’s characterization in the first Movie Prequel comic that was just released), seems like he’s not as big of a threat as the commander of his fleet, Tempest. 

It’s a kind of villain we haven’t seen on the show or even in EQG, and not only that, but 

She’s got a fantastic voice actress behind her, so she can pull off the deliciously evil vibe well without, say, reminding us too much of Chrysalis or other powerful animated villains from Disney classics

Plus her design with the broken horn and her magic sparking up out of it is instantly intriguing to me: for such a powerful presence, it’s awesome to see her weakness (and most likely shady past) is always on display---especially for a commander character, that’s just really cool

Grubber seems to be pretty standard so far, nothing he’s done has really impressed me quite yet, but I’m hoping his best stuff is saved for the movie itself

The sky pirates (or skyrates) look like a lot of fun, and in context I can see how well the bipedal birb pirate blends with the universe (the bipedal designs were the ones I had the most trouble with)

On top of that, we have sea ponies at last! And they’re far more adorable than I ever could’ve hoped

The original sea pony designs from G1 looked a lot more like sea horses, with curling tails and fins on either side, but I think the meraid-ish look is both more marketable for Hasbro and more appealing to look at (the original sea ponies always seemed like a joke in the fandom to me, I admittedly never understood why people would actually want it in G4)

And a-ha! Good queens do exist! Poor Celestia and Luna. Always a princess, never a queen.

Oh, and Seaquestria? It’s freakin’ beautiful. I LOVE the rich blues and purples here. If you haven’t had a chance to check out the 360 image of the underwater palace complete with an excellent piece of background music, treat yourself.

The Mane 6′s sea pony designs are pretty dang adorable. I don’t have anything interesting to say, I just like the cute water horses, okay?

Minor Details and Incidentals

I’ll start out by saying Twilight’s narration in the trailer is pretty standard, but still heartwarming (mostly because I already know and love these characters though). It sort of reminds me of the bits of narration from the How to Train Your Dragon movies, although those had a bit more character to them. 

The what could possible go wrong? line, though. It just makes me laugh thinking of all the flashbacks we could have to the series. 

I guess she’s talking about that festival specifically that she’s organizing, and in that way it’s a show of character development (in a similar way to the character development on display in A Flurry of Emotions, where Twilight is told she’s late and doesn't have a panic attack or worry about what could go wrong... too much), but it’s still hilarious to contrast the idea that nothing could go wrong in Equestria to... literally all of the show. 

AJ and RD protecting their friends even before the others have gotten over the shock of whatever they’re seeing tho

Starlight and Trixie get a bit of screen-time together and it’s adorable. Starlight might be stuck in Canterlot for the duration of the adventure, but I’m glad to see her included. Characters like Discord who might be too hard to explain to new audiences are understandable losses, but even if Starlight’s cameo is brief, it’s good to see her role acknowledged

In terms of music, Sia’s looking adorable so far, and Lukas Graham’s as of yet unreleased Off to See the World sounds pretty catchy (it’s the song at the end of the trailer), so they’ve got talent behind the vocals!

Jumping back to little details, it’s neat how sea pony magic has a very distinct look from unicorn/alicorn magic. Also, the bubbles are really cute

And, okay, I just wanted to take a minute to appreciate how serious this ponk is. Can we all just stop and take a look, because in this scene Twilight’s saying how she’s the one Tempest is after, and she should probably face this alone, which seems to be our Princess of Friendship’s big dilemma in this movie, and Pinkie’s clearly trying to tell her she’s crazy

Gotta love that they didn’t just go for hyperactive comic relief Pinkie Pie; they don’t seem to be boiling down these characters to just one trait (which is partially why I loved the moment where RD and AJ defend the girls; RD’s ego will no doubt be on display throughout the movie, but you’ll also see she’s ready to lay down her life for her friends)

And hey, lookie here! Canterlot got a make-over... and a contractor. There’s more pink than there typically is and it doesn’t necessarily match what we’ve seen of it in the show. Especially places like the throne room:

And you know, I’m a little torn on this detail? It’s beautiful, and I’m digging the starry night mosiac they’ve got going on back there, but it would’ve been nice to see the throne room we know and love rendered in this new style, you know? I’m gonna miss the deep magentas and the stain glass windows of the Mane 6′s accomplishments. I know that’s mostly the fangirl in me, but I like seeing continuity nods back to the show (like hey look: Cadence gets a cameo!)

Unless Canterlot gets destroyed and subsequently rebuilt in the season 7 finale, in which case I’ll shut my mouth

Speaking of which, I still have to wonder exactly when this will take place in the series, or if it exists slightly to the left of canon like the Equestria Girls movies (which, I mean, I consider canon, but still). I know there’s ties into the comics, but I wonder if/when the show will acknowledge the events of the movie... I guess only time will tell

And for now, I think that about wraps it up! All in all, I’m beyond excited to see this thing, as anyone could’ve guessed. 

It should also be noted that a lot of kids movie trailers focus on the fun, comedic portions of the movie, so while I do think it’s mostly going to feel like this, I’m also looking forward to the more character-driven feelsy parts. As we well know, you can never get the full scope of a movie from just the trailer, but it’s usually especially true for kids movies.

Even just from what we have seen, it looks like we’re in for a ride. Can’t wait to get on.

Hey, if you’d like more MLP stuff, you can click right here to see my editorials or here for episode reviews. And if those links don’t look pretty enough, have the last three things I’ve done right here:

Parental Glideance Review, Celestia/Daybreaker Editorial, and LGBT+ Editorial

Year of the Pony

[beingmyownhxro]

tagged by: @alexdanvers-rp​, thank you! ^-^ tagging: @leadershiipskills​ / @fossilis​​, @marsdin​, @i-am-diana-of-themyscira​, @emblemofxfeminism​, and anyone else who wants to~ RULES:  answer the questions & tag some blogs you wanna get to know better !

A  -  AGE:  22 B  -  BIRTHPLACE:   US C  -  CURRENT TIME:  1:04am D  -  DRINK YOU HAD LAST:  pepsi E  -  EASIEST PERSON ( OR PEOPLE ) TO TALK TO:  offline i don’t really have a “can tell them anything” person at this time. online there are and ofc here’s where i get super duper shy since they’ll actually see this. but I have a really easy time talking to ashleigh, elysian, ren, sam, robin, and val. i really love this rp community everyone is so nice ; w; F  -  FAVORITE SONG:  i’m having trouble deciding, but i think i’m gonna go with demi lovato’s “let it go.” (the other contenders are idina menzel’s “let it go” and “libérée, délivrée” [movie version] by anaïs delva YES THAT’S LET IT GO IN FRENCH DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT) G  -  GROSSEST MEMORY:  it’s really fricking gross so i’m gonna put it under a cut at the end to save those of you who understandably do not want to see it. it’s from when i was working in the care field and involves a lot of feces. H  -  HORROR YES OR HORROR NO:  horror no. I  -    IN LOVE?:  does my crush on katie mcgrath count lol J  -  JEALOUS OF PEOPLE:  occasionally i get a little bit jealous of my sister, who’s always gotten really spoiled since she’s the baby. sometimes she gets jealous of me too since i’ve always been given more independence, so it’s just normal sibling stuff. K  -  KILLED SOMEONE:  do bugs count L  -  LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT OR SHOULD I WALK BACK BY AGAIN?: i think you can get a crush on someone right away, but i don’t think it’s LOVE when you know nothing about them. M  -  MIDDLE NAME:  rose N  -  NUMBER OF SIBLINGS:  1 O  -  ONE WISH:  i really really really wanna be a good therapist. P  -  PERSON YOU CALLED LAST:  my mom Q  -  QUESTION YOU’RE ALWAYS ASKED:  it’s not exactly one consistent question, but people regularly mistake me for 14. like when i ask about jobs in person and the person tells me i need to be at least 16 to work there. or when i saw atomic blonde yesterday (r-rated so 17+) and the ticket cashier looked skeptically at my ID for like a solid minute searching for signs that it was fake. and i say 14 specifically because i’ve been told multiple times “you look like you’re 14″ or had my coworkers asked “is she old enough to work here she looks 14.” R  -  REASON TO SMILE:  lena and my awesome threads and friends on here. :> S  -  SONG YOU SANG LAST:  “happy” by marina and the diamonds T  -  TOP 3 FICTIONAL CHARACTERS:  elsa from frozen, lena luthor, and maria torres from trama team U  -  UNDERWEAR COLOR:  ummm white with pandas on it V  -  VACATION:  my trip there was a research project more than a vacation (though i still got to do tons of fun stuff), so i hope someday i can go back to japan as a proper vacation. and i wanna go to disney world sometime. definitely disney world. W -  WHEN’S YOUR BIRTHDAY:  december 17 X  -  XRAYS:  i got a ct scan a few years ago as they were trying to figure out what was causing the sudden horrid pain in my side/back. that was “fun.” it wasn’t anything serious though. (though i had 3 separate men ask me if i was sure it wasn’t period cramps like jfc) Y  -  YOUR FAVORITE FOOD:  it’s a family recipe so nobody’s gonna know what i’m talking about lol. i guess the closest thing to it would be lasagna. it’s made in a casserole dish, and the top layer is ground beef mixed with tomato sauce, then cream cheese + sour cream + cottage cheese + green onion mixed, then egg noodles on the bottom, put in the oven for an hour at 350 F. but we almost never have it because there are so many steps and it makes so many dishes to wash. Z  -  ZODIAC SIGN:  sagittarius

okay my grossest story under the cut, as promised. you’ve been warned.

so this was at my old job, like i said. it involves one of the residents, who was occasionally incontinent (both types -- but it normally wasn’t an issue as she wore adult diapers) to begin with, getting a stomach bug and having diarrhea. she was also blind, so while she was mobile, she wasn’t able to see to clean things up. and her developmental disability was such that she didn’t have a very clear understanding of a lot of things. so you can already guess how fun this day was.

it started off with me doing all her laundry and cleaning the carpet of her bedroom. which wasn’t that bad. but then my coworker, who didn’t clean a single thing in that entire time, decided that this woman really needed to take a bath.           now, quick context. this woman, as i said, was incontinent sometimes to begin with. there had been an incident a couple of weeks ago where as she was taking a bath -- which she can do unassisted except for washing her hair (which she could probably do except she won’t, but she lets us) -- she had a bowel accident during her bath. and proceeded to continue with the bath as though nothing had happened. that wasn’t during one of my shifts so i don’t know why, but yeah, so that happened.          i told my coworker that it was a bad idea -- i thought we were going to have an even more horrid repeat of that incident. she said that no, the woman needed a bath, and i said, more emphatically, “if she tries to take a bath, she’s probably going to have an accident.” the woman tended to take long baths and on this day was having diarrhea bowel movements pretty often. my coworker insisted it would be fine and the woman really needed a bath. now the thing is, someone like my coworker or i could easily get out of the bath and to the toilet if that were us. but it was hard for the woman to get in and out of the tub and to find the toilet to begin with, and add to that the other factors......

sure enough, some time later i hear the woman calling for me from the bathroom. now, thank god she didn’t have an accident while she was in the tub, but she had one as soon as she got out. she felt super bad about it but obviously it wasn’t like she could help it. she said she needed help to get out of the bathroom because she didn’t want to step in it. so i helped her out and to her room and to get dressed, gave her some water, and she went back to sleep. the bathroom was shared with another woman, so i let that woman know that i needed to clean the bathroom and it might take a while so if she needed to use the bathroom she should use the other one. with that, i grabbed a roll of paper towel and cleaning supplies (incl rubber gloves obviously, and a trash bag) and went to see the extent of the damage and get cleaning. to be clear, my coworker did not help me at all. or even offer to help. or even bring me more paper towel when i asked mid-cleaning.

IT WAS HORRIBLE. the next paragraph will continue with the story, so stop reading this paragraph if you don’t want the details. for starters, it was more yellow than brown. actually it was roughly the color of puke. i have somewhat of a phobia of puke, so that was super fun. it was also liquid. i mean LIQUID. it clearly had fallen where she had been standing and splattered into an enormous puddle. virtually the entire surface of the floor was covered. it was on the cupboard under the sink. it was on the bathtub. it was on the wall. it was on the toilet paper. it was on the toilet seat. utterly nightmarish.

but the cleaning needed to be done. i put on some music from my phone -- normally my coworker plays her stuff on the radio and i don’t play my own stuff, but i was like, y’know what i’m cleaning this up by myself she can deal with my demi lovato playlist -- didn’t breathe through my nose, and tried not to think about it too much. i just held on to the fact that i was doing this to help the residents who depended on me and the other staff to take care of them, and hey at least it wasn’t vomit.

i’m a fast worker, especially at cleaning. it took me two hours.

bonus points that the other residents kept like asking me stuff and trying to talk to me while i was doing that cleaning??? which is fine normally -- they’re the first priority, so if i’m doing the dishes or something else that can wait, i didn’t mind pausing to talk to them; some of them have trouble understanding that if we’re in the middle of something and can’t talk at that time, we’re not ignoring them, so i tried to make the time when i could. but uh, this was a special set of circumstances. now you’d think my coworker could’ve handled those things, but no, she was busy playing candy crush or something on her phone.

the real kicker is that after i got done, my coworker left early for no reason (not for the first time) and had left everything from dinner on the table and counters, and told me like 5 other things that needed to be done by the end of my shift. i spent the time between then and my next shift trying to convince myself not to quit until i found a new job -- i’d already been looking for new jobs anyway. but guess what? my supervisor was there and chewed me out because my coworker told her that I made HER do all the work. because my coworker had to make dinner by herself. i hadn’t been going to tattle to our supervisor but since my coworker did that i flat out told my supervisor that she had made dinner alone because i was spending two hours cleaning up diarrhea in the bathroom by myself, and that every single bit of the diarrhea messes all shift i had cleaned up by myself with no help from my coworker.

my supervisor didn’t care and continued to scold me. i handed in my two weeks’ notice the next day. that was too much.

yes, i’m still hella pissed about that.

[shitfics]

One of These Nights (5/?); jongyu; pg

Jinki knows that he’s gay. What he doesn’t know is how to handle a crush on someone as entwined in the music industry as he is. 

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4

this part is thru the beginning of japanese promotions. i tried to make jongyu’s conversation on blue night kinda imitate this one with kim yeon woo. if anything, i toned it down a bit because i was worried it’d come off too forward for these two. ^^;

this part ends on an angsty note...sorry to make y’all suffer 8) but i thought it was a good stopping point. hopefully, i can get the next part up soon! (and the ao3 link i’ve been putting off) ^^;

***

The trip back to Seoul barely feels like coming home. Between concert preparations and the concerts themselves, Jinki barely has time to breathe, and even the first day he gets to spend with his parents is spent sleeping more than catching up. When he finally manages to find the energy to leave his old bedroom and head downstairs, his mom makes a big show of cooking him a meal, fussing over every dish and making double batches to make sure he gets enough.

Jinki hovers  at the entrance to the kitchen as she works. The smell of spices drifts around him as he takes the opportunity to breathe in the familiar scents.

She peeks her head out of the kitchen. "You have enough rest to join us for dinner tonight?"

When Jinki nods, his mom smiles, an extra pep in her movements as she stirs the pot on the stove. "I'd hoped cooking something fresh would wake you up. There's leftovers from dinner last night since you slept through it, but I didn’t want you to have those for your first real meal here."

"It smells wonderful," Jinki says, stomach grumbling at the sight of the numerous dishes already on the stove. Coming home so rarely meant his mom had to fit all of her mothering into a short window of time, and he had learned over the years that just letting her spoil him freely was easier than trying to stop her.

"Doesn't it smell great?" She laughs. "Your dad says I've gotten even better."

Jinki laughs with her. The ever-present invisible weight on his shoulders lightens, and he finds himself sighing as he slumps against the counter. He never realizes how much he's carrying with him until he comes home, though the relief is the same each time.

"You can go ahead and sit, Jinki, don't wait for me to finish cooking -- I can tell your muscles still need the rest after your concert. I'll bring the food to you."

“Alright.” Jinki drags himself out to the dining table and waits. He can't argue with that when he's still too tired to want to stand, and it’s only a few minutes before his mother enters the room with an armful of dishes.

"So, Jinki..." She sets an empty plate in front of him as she lays bowls filled with his favorite foods out across the rest of the table.  "You haven't been visiting us as much this past year."

Jinki leans back in his seat to read his mother's expression. Though her eyes are playful as she layers food onto his plate, he can tell there's a question under the statement.

"I've been busier lately,” he answers finally, unable to resist digging through the food on his plate at the same time even after she cocks a brow at him. He picks up a perfectly-cooked piece of beef with an excited hum -- all the expensive restaurants in the world couldn’t replace his mom's cooking -- and smiles at her broadly. “I’m sorry I haven’t been around. Those musicals take a lot of time to practice for, and then I've been doing all those TV shows too."

“And here I was thinking you met a girl."  His mom's eyes crinkle when she joins him at the table, resting her chin in her hand. "Sounds like you’re working as hard as always.”

"I don't have time for dating." Jinki shrugs. By now, he's used to dodging that question with his parents, and being an idol has made for an easy excuse ever since he debuted.

"I know you don’t." His mom purses her lips in disapproval. As supportive as she had been about his dream to be a singer, she always had held a dislike for the industry's relentless pace. "And if it’s this bad here, even though you debuted years ago, I'm worried they'll really run you ragged in Japan...”

"It's really not that bad, really," Jinki protests. He tries to smile reassuringly. "I still have enough time to meet up with friends, and read, or do whatever else. I've even made a new friend this year."

"Oh?" His mom blinks. "I don't remember you mentioning anyone. Is he another idol?"

"It, uh, didn't really come up when we talked," Jinki says, though that’s a lie -- he’d avoided bringing Jonghyun up on purpose, because a part of him had feared talking about him at all would make it all-too-obvious he had a crush -- and shoves a mouthful of food in his face to keep from talking.

Of course, his mom picks up on that, and narrows her eyes. “What’s his name?”

“Kim Jonghyun. He's not an idol, but he wrote some of the songs on our last album and we met through that. I don't know if you listen to Blue Night, but that's his show."

"The one that’s on at midnight? I've listened to it a few times, when your father's snoring wakes me up..." she trails off, forehead wrinkling as she tries to remember more. "He has a pleasant voice, doesn't he? He seems sensitive and thoughtful, too, if I’m thinking of the right person."

"Yeah, that’s him," Jinki agrees, unable to help a smile. Ever since hearing some of the criticism Jonghyun had gotten, he had gained an appreciation for the people who thought well of him, and it feels good to know his mom is one of them. "He's a really good singer too, though he doesn't do it professionally. We’ve gone out to karaoke a few times."

"Well, I'm glad you managed to meet someone new." She nods. "I was a little worried you would be lonely this year, since most of your old friends are still doing their service, and I know being around your members isn't the same since they're all younger. Is Jonghyun your age?"

"He's a hyung just a little older than me," Jinki says. "Around four years or so."

"Well, you have always gotten along better with people older than you anyway," she says. "I just hope he's a good influence."

"He is," Jinki answers quickly, then turns back to his food. If his mom let him list everything he liked about Jonghyun, it could take hours, and even his mom might be able to that tell that he's nearly in love with the man after that.

As his mother watches him eat, her lips curve down at the corners in thought. "You keep eating instead of talking about him. I feel like there's something you're not telling me about him."

Jinki gives a closed-lip smile as he tries to finish chewing. He'd failed to realize that omitting too much would look just as suspicious.  He swallows and clears his throat. "It’s not that I’m avoiding anything, really. There's just not much to say about Jonghyun-hyung -- he writes music and hosts his radio show, and we meet up for drinks sometimes. That's really all our friendship is."

"Drinking, huh?" his dad interjects loudly from across the room. "Hopefully not too much of that in public."

Jinki drops his spoon and looks over his shoulder. His dad grins back at him, but he doesn’t let up the glare until his dad places a hand on his shoulder and joins them at the table.

"You know how much it takes me to get drunk, dad -- we have the same tolerance, and we both like to drink alone. I barely get drunk anywhere around other people unless it’s at a company party or at Jonghyun’s place.”

"I'm sure you wouldn't get too wild in public, but I don't know what he’s like."

"He's responsible, don’t worry." Jinki sighs. Though his parents had always trusted him completely, they never seemed to extend it to anyone else around his age. “He’s a lightweight, but he knows his limits. I’ve never seen him more than a bit tipsy, and he always cuts himself off then.”

“Well, that’s good.” He laughs. “Just be careful if you’re going out with girls or he’s inviting some along. Drinking too much around your mother is why we had you when we did.”

“Dad!” Jinki groans, face heating with embarrassment, but his mom slaps his shoulder and giggles.

“He’s only saying that because he avoided his parents when he started dating me, and he was worried you were doing the same. Your father is the one that convinced me you found a girlfriend.”

He looks between both of them, blinking innocently and comically wide. “You mean he’s still hasn’t?”

“I’m not looking for one, dad, and I haven’t. Too busy.”

His dad smiles broadly and drapes an arm over his mother’s back. “When you meet the right woman, you’ll find time to make it work.”

“Yeah, I’ll have my manager add her to my schedule as soon as I meet her.” Jinki crinkles his eyes to make his joke seem genuine and returns to his food.

Thankfully, his parents leave him to it. As always, the moment dinner is done and his dad is home from closing up their butcher shop, they’re completely absorbed in each other. Even with his mood soured by the discussion of his non-existent and never-going-to-happen girlfriend, he can’t help but smile when he sees that their affection is still strong after all these years.

 ***

 The usual camera flashes greet Jinki the moment he leaves the terminal with the rest of the members in Japan, and though he’s used to tuning them out or sending them an occasional smile, they irritate him now. He should be excited about debuting in Japan -- he's more than grateful that they’re big enough to be given the chance to debut in a different market -- but he can't help but wish he was home.

Their first recording is early tomorrow morning, and even though they have an interpreter, he isn’t looking forward to trying to sing in a new studio and through a language barrier. The last time he was in a recording studio, he had been there with Jonghyun, too, and it’s going to be hard not to think of the man when the context is so familiar.

When he gets to their new dorms, he throws down his bags, passes out in the nearest bed to claim it as his own, and that’s the last moment he can really consider himself relaxed before he and the members are swept into the flurry of preparations for their Japanese debut.

Even though he thinks of Jonghyun all through the records, it’s days later (a week later, maybe? He’s not sure) that he remembers his phone died on the second day and he hasn’t checked his messages.

Jinki stumbles blearily through the dark dorm for his charger and plugs into the first outlet he finds, even though it means sitting on the floor as he waits for his phone to power back up. They've barely started, and the constant running around of Japanese promotions is killing him -- it isn't as bad as debut, but something about being unable to understand more than a few phrases without having a translator to mediate his every word adds an extra layer of mental exhaustion.

His stomach clenches with guilt when he sees the number 18 pop up next to Jonghyun’s name.

Opening up his messenger, he prepares himself for the clench that seizes his chest every time he reads through Jonghyun's texts, only to find that it aches hollow this time. Though Jinki hadn’t responded to a single one, Jonghyun still made an effort to say something to him daily, and it’s hard not to smile at the string of message.

realjonghyun85: Hey Jinki-yah! How’s Japan? ^^

realjonghyun85: I hope you’re getting sleep! And decent cell service, he he

realjonghyun85: You don’t have to respond, I know you’re busy ... but at least let me know you’re eating well when you have the chance, okay?

realjonghyun85: Nevermind, I see one of your fansites updated -- you look healthy!  I’m glad!

realjonghyun85: Jinki-yah, I know you’re busy, but I’m a little worried...

realjonghyun85: Are you okay? I know you were nervous about your Japanese ... don’t be too hard on yourself, alright?

realjonghyun85: Drinking is really boring without you, Jinki-yah

realjonghyun85: I don’t know how you stand drinking alone

realjonghyun85: I miss you a lo

realjonghyun85: Jinki-yah ... you can ignore that last message...

realjonghyun85: Not that I don’t miss you! ^^; but, I was just feeling sensitive from drinking...

realjonghyun85: I’m not sure if I should just assume you’re really busy, or worry that Taemin used your phone and lost it...

realjonghyun85: But when you’re back, I better hear that you read one of the books I gave you!

realjonghyun85: That’s the only way I’ll forgive you for ignoring me, got it!?

realjonghyun85: ...I’m teasing, of course ^^;

realjonghyun85: Did you get to see the moon last night?

realjonghyun85: It was really pretty ... I felt inspired for the first time in a few days

realjonghyun85: Jinki-yah, I'll have a good song for you when you all come back

Jinki chews his lip guiltily when he reaches the last message. He wants to respond right now, but it’s already two in the morning, and he knows Jonghyun is likely to be wide-awake for another few hours. He’s not sure he has the courage to message him when it could get an immediate response, after he’d obviously worried him by avoiding him.

But then again -- if he doesn’t do it now, when is he going to find the time?

Taking a deep breath, he summons his courage and starts to type.

majingki: Jonghyunnie-hyung...

majingki: Are you awake?

majingki: I’m so sorry I missed your messages TT

majingki: We’ve been so busy, I forgot to charge my phone...

majingki: We finished recording today and I just realized it was dead

majingki: I’m really sorry hyung ... thank you for messaging me so much

majingki: I seriously miss you a lot

 His screen stays blank for a minute, before he hears the ping of a new message.

 realjonghyun85: Do you really, Jinki-yah?

majingki: Yes, of course TT I’m so sorry again...

majingki: I really didn’t mean to miss your messages hyung TT

realjonghyun85: I believe you ... but you made me worry

realjonghyun85: I was afraid your managers took your phone or something ... I’ve heard that idols sometimes aren’t allowed phones during debut

realjonghyun85: I was worried maybe they were doing that for your Japanese debut...

majingki: Don’t worry, I still have my phone ... ^^

majingki: Even if they took it, I’d find a way to message you

realjonghyun85: You’d get yourself in trouble for me? He he

realjonghyun85: Be careful with that, Jinki-yah

majingki: You’re my friend, of course I would

majingki: I feel bad I missed talking to you for so long TT

majingki: How have you been doing? We haven’t talked about the holidays at all

realjonghyun85: Ah, yeah ... I just spent it with my mom and noona

realjonghyun85: It was a short break, and I’m already tired again now

realjonghyun85: I've been doing lots of recordings lately...

realjonghyun85: Though on the other end of things from you he he

realjonghyun85: How about you? Did your Seoul concerts go well?

realjonghyun85: I'm sure they did since it's you, but I want to hear it ^^

majingki: You're so confident in me hyung he he

majingki: The concerts went well ^^

majingki: And I finally have some energy to read while traveling instead of sleeping he he

majingki: I haven’t gotten a chance to read, though... what book should I start with?

majingki: I’m sure you’re already reading don't want to fall behind TT

realjonghyun85: I’ve started the one with the dragon on the front

realjonghyun85: Sodam said it's my kind of book ... and I do like it so far

realjonghyun85: If you want to start another one we can, though you already picked last time

majingki: Yeah, I did... I know you didn’t like it much, sorry ^^;

majingki: So we can do this one then

majingki: But the summary ... I’m looking at it now ... something about a journey ...

majingki: Is this some lord of the rings thing again ... ?

realjonghyun85: It's not!! It's really not!!

realjonghyun85: I remember you didn't really like those books!!!

realjonghyun85: You told me the truth when you were drunk and we watched the movies

majingki: Did I? He he

majingki:  Sorry ... I wanted to read them for you but they're just not my thing

realjonghyun85: You're too nice Jinki-yah

realjonghyun85: But I promise this one's different!! There’s no wars or orcs!!!

realjonghyun85: No long descriptions of nature!!!

realjonghyun85: Just a long journey and adventurers traveling together from what Sodam told me

majingki: ...A long journey? Adventurers?

majingki: Hyung, that sounds a lot like lord of the rings

realjonghyun85: It's not!!! It's really not Jinki-yah!

realjonghyun85: There's no elves or dwarves or anything... most of the characters are human

majingki: Mostly human? He he

majingki: Where do you find these books hyung ...

realjonghyun85: Don’t be mean TT I told you Sodam recommended it

realjonghyun85: Even if it's boring, it has to be better than the anatomy book you made us read last...

majingki: Those are really interesting, you know! And I thought it might be useful for you!

majingki: That kind of knowledge helps for weight-lifting, right?

realjonghyun85: Are you saying I look like I don’t know what I’m doing with that ... hmph

realjonghyun85: You've seen me, right?

majingki: Yeah, I've seen you ^^

realjonghyun85: I'm working out even more now too

realjonghyun85: Since we aren't drinking every other night...

realjonghyun85: Soon I’ll have a dragon ball body he he

majingki: Really hyung? He he

majingki: I guess I'll see the results when I get back ^^

realjonghyun85: No point in it if I’m not going to show it off, right

realjonghyun85: It'll be hot then, so I can go sleeveless

majingki: You can go sleeveless now hyung ^^ It’s a pretty warm spring, isn’t it?

realjonghyun85: Maybe~

 ***

realjonghyun85: Jinki-yah...

realjonghyun85: How are you?

realjonghyun85: How's Japan??

realjonghyun85: It’s been a few days since we’ve talked ... TT

realjonghyun85: At least during your promotions here I could see you often on TV

majingki: Yeah ... I’m sorry hyung

majingki: If you miss me that much, you can go through old fansite data? ^^

realjonghyun85: You say that like it’s easy ... it can be hard to get to pictures

realjonghyun85: I have to level up more first...

majingki: Level up?

majingki: You actually joined a site??

realjonghyun85: I wanted to see what they were like!!

realjonghyun85: You teased me about following one on twitter, so I might as well join one for real

realjonghyun85: And now I’m like a spy ... I'll be able give you insight on your fans

majingki: So you’re ... posing as my fan?

realjonghyun85: What is that "..." for??

realjonghyun85: Sigh ...  I'm being too weird, aren't I...

majingki: It's not bad ^^

realjonghyun85: Good!!

realjonghyun85: Ah I just remembered

realjonghyun85: I wanted to ask

realjonghyun85: How far are you in that book? Are you liking it?

majingki: Not too far, we've been pretty busy TTT

majingki: Working on pronunciation takes forever and I’ve only gotten to read when we’re in the car

majingki: I'm a fourth of the way through

majingki: Are you already done?

realjonghyun85: Ah, yeah ... I’m pretty close to the end

realjonghyun85: I’m kind of shocked by what’s happening ... I don’t know how my noona found a book like this

majingki: Hyung!!!

majingki: Stop!!!

majingki: Don't tell me more!!

majingki: I actually want to read it on my own... TT Don’t spoil it

realjonghyun85: Sorry Jinki-yah

realjonghyun85: I'm not used to you minding spoilers for fantasy

realjonghyun85: Where are you at then?

majingki: I'm at the part where the adventurers go to the inn bathhouse together

realjonghyun85: Ah... but you’re not done with that scene yet, right?

realjonghyun85: I don't want to spoil anything ... but ... it’s okay if you stop reading there

majingki: Uh ... why would I stop?

majingki: Does something happen?

realjonghyun85: I just worry it might be awkward

realjonghyun85: My sister didn't warn me about the book having those things

realjonghyun85: I don’t mind, but I understand if you do ^^;

majingki: What things?

majingki: ...Is there a sex scene or something?

majingki: You don’t have to worry about my innocence hyung ^^

realjonghyun85: It’s not a sex scene! You have a dirty mind!

majingki: What else am I supposed to think it is? TT

majingki: You won’t tell me...

realjonghyun85: I know, he he ... sorry

realjonghyun85: Um ...

realjonghyun85: Where you’re at ... the main character starts getting feelings for his guide

realjonghyun85: It’s kind of obvious, too

majingki: Oh

majingki: He does?

realjonghyun85: Yeah

realjonghyun85: Sorry if it’s awkward ... ^^;

realjonghyun85: Since they’re both men ...

majingki: It’s fine

majingki: I don't mind it

realjonghyun85: Really?

reajonghyun85: You don't?

majingki: It's just a story

realjonghyun85: Yeah...

realjonghyun85: I guess so

majingki: Did you want to stop reading because of that?

realjonghyun85: No, not at all

realjonghyun85: I was only worried how you might react

realjonghyun85: We never talk about that kind of thing, so ...

realjonghyun85: I should have known you'd be mature about it though

majingki: Of course ^^

majingki: I'm only a few years younger than you, after all

realjonghyun85: Still, there are people older than you who would be bothered

majingki: Some people are bothered by anyone different

realjonghyun85: Yeah ... you’re right

majingki: And it makes sense for them to start liking each other anyway

majingki: Since they're spending so much time together

majingki: I don't like romance in stories that feels random

realjonghyun85: He he ... that’s very true

realjonghyun85: It feels really natural

majingki: Yeah

realjonghyun85: Being friends first makes more sense

majingki: I think so too

  ***

 Jinki slows down to let Minho sling an arm around his shoulders as they walk back off of the filming site for their remake of Juliette. Though Minho’s arm is coming from a different height, the gesture somehow still reminds him of Jonghyun, and it only makes it harder not to rush him back to the van. They had managed to wrap up the night-time filming an hour before midnight, and if they get back to their dorm fast enough, Jinki will have just enough time to charge his dead phone and catch Blue Night. He missed the radio show, and though he’d been able to text Jonghyun more often lately, he still hasn’t gotten a chance to sit and listen to his voice since their Japanese promotions had begun.

To Jinki's relief, the other members pile into the van quickly, in a rush to leave the set and grab their usual post-filming food as fast as possible. The four of them beg their managers into taking them to some restaurant on the other side of the city, which allows Jinki to be dropped off at the dorm along the way.

The fact he’s getting actual alone time doesn’t sink in until he’s in the elevator with nothing but himself and his key card. He sighs and presses his forehead against the cool metal doors. Though a part of him wants to take the time to enjoy more than a quick jerk-off in the shower, he knows he’d regret missing Blue Night. Theoretically, he could do both, but...he hasn’t used Jonghyun’s voice for that purpose since they’d gotten close -- it felt weird, somehow, even though his fantasies are still centered on the thought of seducing Jonghyun or that one night of drunken cuddling going further.

He pushes those thoughts away when the elevator doors slide open. He can enjoy them later, if he has the time, but for now, he can at least appreciate that the members can’t tease him for smiling too much while he listens to the show.

Jinki manages to get his phone to turn back on just as the clock hits midnight. He plugs in his headphones quickly, hands fumbling as he rushes to open the radio app to Blue Night, and catches the end of the intro song before he hears Jonghyun’s Blue Night.

"This is Jonghyun at Blue Night."

It's what he always begins with, but this time, Jinki's chest clenches at the introduction. It really has been forever since he's heard Jonghyun's voice, and even through the crackle of his headphones, it sounds warm and smooth.

At the first song, Jinki closes his eyes, imagining Jonghyun humming along to the slow tune as it plays in the broadcasting station. He had never gotten a chance to visit Jonghyun at his work before, but he knows Jonghyun can't resist singing along to whatever music catches his ears, whether he was in public or not, and he imagines the can’t resist joining in even when he’s hosting the radio show.

As if confirming his guess, and Jonghyun hums a repeat of the chorus when the song fades, then laughs at himself lightly. "It's a good melody to sing along to, right? Simple but pretty. That was Tablo's new song -- I helped him write it, you know. We collaborated."

Jinki grins at the pride in Jonghyun's voice. He'd been talking about that song for a while.

"We don't have a guest on the schedule today, so we'll be working in a lot of listener questions tonight. I always like hearing what my listeners have to say, so please feel free to send in any thoughts you have."

Jinki runs his finger around the edge of his phone. He could send a question or a message -- Jonghyun would probably like that, especially if he could figure out it sent from him. But would it be more fun to make up an elaborate story, or just send a message as himself to let him know he’s listening?

I could ask him about one-sided love -- see if he'd want to be confessed, even if there was little chance he would ever like that someone back.

Pressing his the heel of his hands against his eyes, Jinki rolls over onto his stomach. He's not sure he'd want to hear the answer to that, actually. And it wouldn't change how he’ll deal with his feelings -- even if Jonghyun isn’t bothered by a man loving another man in a story, he can't imagine he’d be comfortable learning that one of his closest friends had fallen for him.

When he realizes his thoughts have taken him away from the broadcast, Jinki turns up the volume on his phone to get re-absorbed in the show and catches the end of a story. "Well, that was a long one -- though we have more time than usual, I don't think we'll get through that many messages tonight, if the rest are like that...it looks like everyone is sending in long ones. And there’s a lot more questions about songwriting and music than usual.” He laughs. “Was my last song that popular?"

"Minho loves it," Jinki responds, as if Jonghyun can hear him. He liked it too, but Jonghyun already knew that.

"Ah, I finally found a short one." Jonghyun shifts into his reading voice for the question aloud. "’You've worked with a lot of idols recently. Are there any that stick out to you as particularly talented, o rany that you’ve gotten close to?’"

Jinki sits up on his elbows, now listening intently

"Idol friends?” Jonghyun pauses to consider it. “It's hard to make any, the way you would with non-celebrities. They have a different life than us, most of the time, even though they’re people too. They're always busy with something or another, or they’re traveling, and it's hard for most of them to go out much without being recognized. But I’ve gotten close to one of them.”

Jinki swallows -- he knows, logically, that Jonghyun means him, but at the same time, he can’t help but worry there might be someone else--

"Jinki -- ah, sorry, Onew-ssi, from SHINee, is the one I’m closest to. He’s my dongsaeng and I like to treat him to things -- we've gone out a lot since we met when I was working on his group’s last Korean album. They’re promoting in Japan right now, so we haven't gotten to see each other for a long time...but we still message each other weekly and share the books we’re reading. Even though he’s far away, I still consider him one of my best friends.” Jonghyun gives a shy laugh that makes Jinki’s heart clench. “Ah, it feels odd saying that on air for some reason...he's not really the type to openly discuss having such a friendship, and he values his privacy."

A smile blooms on Jinki’s lips. He hadn't realized Jonghyun considered them that close. Though he supposes Jonghyun's actions showed it -- Jonghyun did travel to another country just to see his first concert -- he had been so casual about it that Jinki was convinced he’d do the same for any other friend.

Jonghyun’s laugh draws his attention back to the radio. "You know, I feel like I should play a SHINee song now. Is that alright? They just rereleased this song as a single in Japanese a few weeks ago, for their debut over there, but we'll be playing the original version -- nothing quite beats a classic."

When the audio cuts to the familiar opening beats of Replay, Jinki's already wide smile break into a grin. He swipes open his phone quickly, no longer able to resist the urge to text Jonghyun.

majingki: Hey hyung~ ^^

majingki: I hear you were talking about me?

realjonghyun85: Jinki-yah!

realjonghyun85: You’re up?

majingki: Yeah ^^

majingki: We had to film something at night

realjonghyun85: Oh, I see

realjonghyun85: Were you listening to me?

realjonghyun85: Ah, I’m embarrassed now ... I only spoke that way because I thought you weren’t!

realjonghyun85: Now you think I’m soft-hearted and cheesy don’t you... TT

majingki: Yeah, I was listening, hyung ^^

majingki: But I didn’t need to hear you talk about your feelings to know you’re cheesy

majingki: I’ve known you’re that way for a while he he

realjonghyun85: Really, you tease me too much TT

majingki: It’s fun, though ^^

majingki: I missed listening to you ... sorry I haven’t listened all this time

majingki: Can I call you?

realjonghyun85: Why do you have to ask me when I’m at work, huh TT

realjonghyun85: Unless you want to be on air you’ll have to wait till 2 AM

majingki: I meant after your show ...

majingki: But being on air is fine too ^^

majingki: Wouldn't it be fun?

realjonghyun85: Eh?

realjonghyun85: You're serious?

majingki: Yeah ^^

majingki: Do you not have time to fit me?

realjonghyun85: Ah, it's not that he he

realjonghyun85: Of course I want you to call

realjonghyun85: But your company ...

majingki: They don't control us that tightly, hyung

majingki: Not enough to stop me from calling a friend

majingki: Even if that friend happens to host a radio show ^^

realjonghyun85: You’re such a rebel!

realjonghyun85: I'll let you on then ... sounds fun

realjonghyun85: Right now, your song’s ending so I need to check with the PD

realjonghyun85: But I’ll either call you after a little introduction or let you know we can’t fit you

realjonghyun85: Okay?

realjonghyun85: Wait for me, Jinki-yah

majingki: Okay hyung ^^

realjonghyun85: Just don't fall asleep!

When the next song finally comes to an end, a knot forms in Jinki's stomach as it sinks in that he’s going to be speaking to Jonghyun on air -- not in at his house, or in a bar, where he could easily change the subject and brush off any awkwardness from his crush -- but in front of an audience, where he’d have to act professional and hope no one could hear the pining behind his words.

"I have a little surprise tonight, for all of my listeners that are SHINee fans.”

Jinki turns his attention back to the radio.

"Remember when I talked about Onew before the commercial break? He was actually listening to me talk about our friendship earlier all the way from Japan, and messaged me to say hello. He asked to call, and the PD gave me permission, so we're going to put him on now, as soon as I can call him..."

Jinki unplugs his headphones to avoid any feedback and sits up straighter. At the first ring of his phone, he takes a deep breath and puts on his stage smile to keep his voice steady when he answers the call. "Hello? Jonghyun?"

"Onew! I'm calling from my radio show. Can you hear me alright?"

"Yeah, I can hear you, hyung." Jinki smiles, unable to help it. The reception of the call isn’t as clear as the broadcast had been, but he can still hear the warmth in Jonghyun’s voice.

"Good!" Jonghyun enthuses. "I was worried an intentional call wouldn't work well. You're still in Japan, right?"

"Yeah. All of SHINee is here still," Jinki answers, going along with the conversation. "We just wrapped up the filming for our next music video tonight. The members are out eating. I wanted to rest a bit."

"So this music video...it's for Juliette, right? How different are the lyrics in this version? I'm curious if they'd translate..." Jonghyun trails off, sucking in a harsh breath. "Wow. Sorry, the PD wanted me to check the messages -- you haven't even been on for a minute, and our system is already blowing up."

Jinki laughs. "Sorry about that, hyung."

"It's not a bad thing, obviously -- that’s the power of a celebrity. And I'd already gotten some messages just from mentioning you and our friendship, anyway..." Jonghyun huffs. "Some people don't seem to believe I could actually be that close with someone from SM."

"Really? Why not?" Jinki asks, confused. He can't imagine why anyone would think Jonghyun would lie about that.

"I don't know...maybe I complain too much about being a loner on air. But I do have friends, and you’re one of them, even if I never mentioned you much until now. I’ve posted about you before! I went to your concert in Japan! And we read books together, write music together, play billiards together--"

"Drink a lot together,” Jinki interrupts.

Jonghyun laughs. "Are you allowed to admit that?"

"Well, we're close enough to speak honestly, aren't we?"

"Yes, of course," Jonghyun says. There’s an easy lift in his voice that makes it easy for Jinki to picture the grin he’s wearing on the other end of the line. "We're always close enough to speak honestly with each other, as long as it doesn't get you in trouble -- or me in trouble, for ruining your image."

"You won't get in trouble, hyung. It's fine for me to admit that I drink. We've been men for two comebacks now." Jinki grins. Falling into banter with Jonghyun is always easy.

"Yes, that's true, isn’t it? You were already a man when I met you," Jonghyun says, and something about the way he says it nearly makes Jinki lose his breath. "Do you think you'll be men again for your next Korean album, or will you turn back into boys?"

"Um, well -- good question.” Jinki stalls for a moment to fight the flush on his cheeks. “Since we're re-releasing our old songs in Japan, we're boys again at the moment, so I'm not sure what we'll be once we're back -- we’re still working on time traveling, though we’re already quite good at it."

"Yes, as all idols are," Jonghyun agrees with complete seriousness. "You all have such intense schedules, it's a necessary skill. I hope you can use that skill to find the time to visit soon."

Jinki bunches up the nearby sheets under his hand, trying not to sound overly excited when Jonghyun jumps subjects.  "I think I can work something out -- I might have a day free back home soon."

"Oh? You should spend it with me -- we'll go out for food. I'll buy you lots and lots, okay? And drinks too, as usual."

"Thank you, hyung," Jinki says, brimming with warmth. "I appreciate you having me on air and always buying me things -- I like you a lot."

He flushes the moment the words leave his mouth. He's so used to saying that on air for fans and hosts, to get the cheers that follow, but this was Jonghyun -- why had he thought that would be a good idea?

"Hah...Jinki-yah..." Jonghyun fumbles for words, clearly flustered. "You're not normally this affectionate with me. You'll make my listeners jealous."

"Ah, I like them a lot too, though."

"You do?"He laughs. "Then you have to come visit Blue Night sometime, to prove it."

"Sure, hyung. Once we're back in Seoul for a while."

"Please do!" The line goes silent for a moment, then Jonghyun sighs, disappointment edging into his words. "PD’s orders...I should get back to the expected program now. Thank you again for calling, Jin--Onew-ssi. Eat well, and get some rest too, alright? Good luck on your new single!"

"I am, and I will -- thanks, hyung." Jinki smiles, and the knowledge that Jonghyun is on a fixed schedule is the only thing that makes it possible to resist buying more time on the phone with Jonghyun. "I'll see you soon, hopefully."

“For sure.”

The line goes dead, and Jinki groans at the silence left behind. When the ping of an incoming message comes from his phone, he groans louder, and spends a whole minute debating whether or not he has the courage to see what Jonghyun will say.

 ***

realjonghyun85: Jinki-yah ^^

realjonghyun85: Thanks for letting me call ... I know we had to talk about trivial things, since we were on air ... but it was good to chat with you still!

realjonghyun85: I hope you had some fun being on Blue Night!!

realjonghyun85: You know it’s my pride

majingki: Of course hyung!! I love your show and listen to it lots

majingki: It was nice to participate in it this time ^^

realjonghyun85: Yeah? I'll call you more often then

majingki: I’d like if you called me more~ ^^ whether or not its for the radio

realjonghyun85: You have to call me too though!!

realjonghyun85: It's hard for me to know when I should, so I get nervous ... I can't keep track of your schedule

majingki: Ah, I didn't think of that... TT

majingki: I'll try and call you more then

majingki: Or at least let you know my schedule

realjonghyun85: He he good

realjonghyun85: I think I already know one part of your schedule though ...

majingki: Really?

realjonghyun85: Yeah ...

realjonghyun85: I know you should be sleeping right now ...

realjonghyun85: Am I right Jinki-yah? ^^

majingki: I guess TT

majingki: Do you not want to talk more?

realjonghyun85: Of course I want to talk to you more!

realjonghyun85: But you need the rest ... and I need to drive home he he

majingki: Okay ... I’ll sleep for now then

majingki: And message you in the morning? ^^

majingki: Or you can leave messages for me while I’m sleeping?

realjonghyun85: Alright Jinki-yah

realjonghyun85: I’ll let you know what I do tonight

realjonghyun85: Though I’m warning you, it’s boring ... just staying home and watching movies

majingki: I’d like that, though

majingki: Maybe we could do that soon?

majingki: We have a Korean schedule coming up ... so I’ll be there for a bit, with one free day

majingki: But I can try and see you then?

realjonghyun85: Yes!! Please!!

realjonghyun85: You won't be able to escape me he he

realjonghyun85: I'm going to fill you up with food from your home county ...  and alcohol~

majingki: You make it sound like a threat, hyung ...

majingki: But I'm looking forward to it ^^

realjonghyun85: Hopefully, it’ll be soon then!

majingki: I hope so too he he

majingki: Good night hyung

majingki: I hope I wasn't too affectionate on air ^^;

realjonghyun85: No such thing!! Not from you he he

realjonghyun85: You’re my favorite dongsaeng ^^

majingki: He he ... it was cheesy though, right?

majingki: I just missed you a lot

realjonghyun85: A little ... but I like you a lot too

realjonghyun85: So don’t worry about it ... alright?

majingki: Alright ^^ Thanks hyung

realjonghyun85: You too!

realjonghyun85: Good night Jinki-yah

  ***

 Outside the back exit of their Seoul dorms, Jinki takes a long inhale of the night air to absorb the scent. Logically, he's sure that all cities must smell like the same mix of pollution and people, but the undertones of Seoul make it unique enough for him to distinguish it as home. It's not where he was born, or where his parents are, but he’s been year for so many years now -- and it's the only place he wants to be on his only free night before they go back to Japan.

In a different part of the city, Jonghyun is already waiting for him, and he hasn't gotten to see Jonghyun in person since their concert three months ago. He’d gotten better and better at keeping in touch with him through messaging and the occasional phone call, but it still isn’t the same as getting to see him in person.

Though he wanted to see Jonghyun as soon as he was done with his morning schedules, he still has a short while to wait before Jonghyun would be free.

Meaning he had plenty of time to relax himself. After checking to make sure the small alley is clear, Jinki digs into his pocket for the lighter and pack of cigarettes he had bought the moment they'd returned to Korea. Their Japanese management stuck to them like glue, and he hadn’t had a chance to sneak in a smoke while they were there, even though he’d needed the stress relief more than ever. He couldn't risk lighting one up on the balcony of their new dorm and ruining their fresh image, not when their more obsessive fans had already found the address.

At least in Korea, he knows where to hide for his indulgence.

Jinki lights his cigarette and takes a long drag, letting his eyes fall closed as the smoke fills his lungs before releasing it with a sigh and a smile. It's been far too long since he's gotten to do this. He slumps down as he relaxes, tucking himself further under the stairs of the fire escape. There’s background noise, from cars and people, but it was nothing like traveling all over Japan with the members. They were still new there, and didn’t yet have the luxury of individual rooms, which made Jinki more than a little stir-crazy from managing four personalities and tempers on top of his own.

On his second cigarette, he remembers to check the time, and swears immediately -- now he's late. He stands on his toes and reaches for the empty can he keeps hidden under the stairs of the fire escape to shove the ends of his cigarettes inside, then pulls his facemask up over his ears and and runs towards the street to hail a cab.

When he finally arrives Jonghyun's apartment building, Jinki stops at one of the windows in the hallway leading to his door, unable to help giving his hair and outfit a quick lookover. He’d given up any hope of his crush fading while they were apart. His feelings are just as strong as they had been when he had last seen Jonghyun, if not stronger. That last moment they’d had together in Japan, and the efforts Jonghyun had made to keep in contact with him, made it impossible not to hope that there was at least some chance his feelings might be returned.

But, that was still too unlikely for him to risk confessing anything himself.

With a sigh, Jinki draws back from the glass and heads to the door of Jonghyun’s apartment. He rings the doorbell and shoves his hands back in his pockets to keep from fidgeting. The pad of socked feet rushing to the door makes him smile, and he fixes his bangs one last time just before the lock unclicks.

Jonghyun opens the door and greets Jinki with a broad smile.

"Jinki-yah!"  

He throws himself through the doorway to give Jinki a hug hard enough to nearly lock him off balance. Jinki laughs, but it dies in his throat when Jonghyun tightens his arms and a familiar flutter rises back in his chest. He let's his own hands fall to Jonghyun's waist, and Jonghyun gives him another squeeze, making no attempt to back away even as his words fall into the crook of Jinki's neck. "Shit, I missed you."

"I missed you too, hyung," Jinki mumbles, cheeks warming.

"I'm not used to you being the late one -- did you get a head start on drinking or something?" Jonghyun scrunches his nose as he steps away from Jinki and fixes his glasses. "You already smell like a bar."

Jinki sniffs at his jacket. The scent of cigarettes is barely noticeable to him, but Jonghyun had always mentioned he had a sensitive nose, and this was the first time he’d squeezed a smoke in right before seeing him. "No, I came right here after packing. I just had a smoke right before I left, though, since I haven’t been able to in Japan."

Jonghyun's amused expression falls. "...You smoke?"

"Yeah? I thought you knew." Jinki shrugs. "It helps with stress. A lot of other idols do it. I picked up the habit from some of my sunbaes when I was a trainee."

"You started smoking during your training period?” Jonghyun asks, voice straining with poorly hidden admonishment. “You were supposed to be working on improving your voice then. And your company didn't stop you after you debuted?"

"They can't control everything about our lives." Jinki shrugs. "As far as I can tell, they don’t even know that I do. It's not like I'd let our managers or anyone else who'd get pissed about it find out."

"Well, I found out." Jonghyun frowns. "And I can’t believe you smoke. It's irresponsible, Jinki. You're a singer -- you need to take care of your voice, not damage it for a stupid habit.."

"I know that, hyung. I'm not stupid.” Jinki sighs and pushes a hand through his hair, trying to keep his temper from rising. “Do you have to argue with me about this now?"

"Yeah, since I just found out about it. If I had known before, I would have argued with you then."

"Well, I don't want to talk about it, hyung." Jinki tries to smile.  "And you’re not going to convince me to quit in one night, so let's just go and get drinks."

"If we go to a bar, all I'm going to think about is how many times you might have smoked before without me knowing it...” He shakes his head and sighs. “I can’t believe you never told me you smoke."

"It’s something I only do when I’m alone, and it’s not really your business," Jinki says sharply. "Just because you're my hyung doesn't mean you need to lecture me."

Jonghyun pinches the bridge of his nose sighs, then looks at him with a teacher-like patience that only makes Jinki's temper flare more. "Jinki, I didn't say anything about your age."

"Then stop talking to me like I'm a clueless kid!" Jinki snaps. “I know it’s a bad habit, but I don’t want to quit right now, alright?”

Jonghyun's volume finally raises to meet Jinki’s. "You need to quit now, Jinki -- before you really hurt your voice! I’m not trying to control you, and if you'd just calm down and listen, you'd realize that I only want to help."  

"Whatever, hyung." Jinki cuts Jonghyun off and yanks his face mask out of his pocket. Hands shaking, he hooks the strings over his ears clumsily and reaches for the door. "I'm going back to the dorm. I don’t want to deal with being lectured on my only night off."

"Jinki, wait -- c'mon--" Jonghyun rushes to follow him, but he’s too slow to stop Jinki from stepping outside and slamming the door behind him.

Jinki pulls his beanie down over his ears to block out the last echo of Jonghyun's voice through the door. He rushes to the staircase, skipping the elevator in the hopes that stomping down the stairs will drown out the throb of anger in his head and keep Jonghyun from following him. When he finally steps outside, the smack of his breath against the heavy air makes him realize just how worked up he'd gotten, and his cheeks burn with shame as he remembers their last exchange before he’d left.  

He shouldn't have gotten so angry over something so petty -- he knows Jonghyun has the best intentions -- but he can’t help but be upset with him. His smoking is bad, obviously, but Jonghyun shouldn't have pushed him about it on the only night they'll get to have together in weeks.

Jinki glances back up at Jonghyun's apartment building. Half of him wants to apologize, but his pride won’t let him go back up after storming out. Not wanting to risk Jonghyun coming out of the building to look for him, Jinki walks further down the street before pulls out his phone to call a cab.

His phone screen flips between light and dark as he flicks the light screen on and off, unable to resist checking to see if Jonghyun will text him some miraculous apology that would bring them back to before they'd fought. As much as he’s afraid of what Jonghyun might say, the dead silence is worse, and he finds himself glowering at the taxi driver’s cheerful greeting when he finally pulls up.

To make up for his rudeness, he tips the driver extra when they reach the dorm building, but the genuine thanks he gets does nothing to cure his sour mood. All the adrenaline is out of his system, but he's still irritated enough that it takes him a few tryings of smashing the keys of the number lock on the door to their dorm to put in the right code. When he finally gets it, he swings the door open and slams it behind him, yanking down the zipper of his jacket as he flings his bag aside.

"Oh, hyung, uh--" Taemin shoots up from the couch when he enters the living room and fumbles to hide his phone. "I thought you were seeing Jonghyun tonight?"

"He canceled," Jinki grumbles, too irritated to tease Taemin about whatever he’d been up to. He tosses his jacket over the first piece of furniture he sees and doesn’t bother to adjust it to keep it from having wrinkles in the morning. "I already finished packing, so I’m just going to sleep till our flight.”

"...Okay," Taemin agrees, clearly hesitant to ask what put Jinki in such a bad mood. “I’ll see you in the morning, hyung.”

"Sure." Jinki forces out a grateful smile before he shuts the door of his room behind him, wanting to be by himself. At least Taemin would respect him enough to leave him alone.

[missvanessagiardi]

adventures in babysitting || bodessa + 1

Tagging:   Vanessa and Bodie Holliday, Indigo McCarthy

Time: January 29th, 2025 (FUTURE WEEK)

Location: Marina Del Rey, Vanessa’s Condo

Notes: Vanessa (hastily) volunteers to babysit for MJ and Lo...much to Bodie’s chagrin surprise.  Thanks to little Indy, the two get a tiny taste of parenthood.

Addtional Info: This is a future week para.  Thank you to @lomccarthy and @immj for letting us steal your character’s child for this!

Bodie told herself she wouldn't go back to West. Not for the rest of their little trip. But avoiding a kitchen is like trying to ignore the pull of a siren's song. She just can't. Especially at West. Her first kitchen. /Her/ first kitchen. Her name is on the door. Vanessa's picture hangs in the foyer. There are so many memories. She can't help but go back and observe the continuation of the journey. So she might've gotten a little caught up in the kitchen after a long morning of boardwalks and strolls with Vanessa and Angus. So she's not coming home empty-handed. Fresh dinner for both of them and a nice bone for Angus! Pushing her way through the front door, Bodie calls out. "Honey, I'm hoooome~"

Vanessa meanwhile has both of her long, lanky forearms elbow deep in warm sudsy water, a silly expression on her face. Eyes crossing, and tongue peeking out. Her audience for this performance? A babbling and happy little Indigo McCarthy: Vanessa's last second volunteer to help MJ and Lo have a nice night out. The whole afternoon Vanessa had the baby out on the sands, cuddled up on the couch, and most recently getting a wash after making quite the mess of herself and a certain silly pitbull with babyfood. Angus insisted on joining his new friend in the tub, and Vanessa could scarcely resist, and now she's tasked with making sure both were squeaky clean. She's so focused, Bodie's return barely registers as she idly calls back. "In the bathroom, babe!"

Bodie takes her time setting down the food she's brought home, plating and placing it in the oven to keep warm while she follows up with Vanessa. She pulls a bottle of wine from the closet and sets it out to aerate then calls to the speaker sitting on the other side of the room to play an instrumental jazz playlist. It's a nice start to a nice wind-down of a nice night in with her wife, and Bodie takes her time. She moves from the kitchen to the bedroom and immediately strips out of her kitchen clothes to pull on a clean, comfortable pair of sweats and an old V-neck. Hair gets tossed up. Glasses get put on. And then she ambles into the bathroom. Angus' absence has been conspicuous, and paired with Vanessa's explanation, Bodie's assumed he's getting bath. And she's right. He's just.. got company. Little company. Little human company. Bodie slows her approach, mouth hanging open in suspended surprise as she stares at the baby in their bath and then at Vanessa. Arms fold across her chest. "IIIIIIIIIII... didn't know to be expecting company."

Vanessa freezes on the spot, the silence is filled with the baby's joyful gurgles as Angus licks a blob of bubbles off of her head. ​Shit!​. Turning her head on her neck to look back at her wife, Vanessa offers a sheepish expression. "Uh....I can explain." Quickly, she rinses the remaining bubbles from the baby's head and she lifts little Indigo out of the water, immediately wrapping the infant in a warm fluffy towel and holding her against her chest. A pudgy fist wraps around Vanessa's long pointer finger, and the model pantomimes a wave. "Indy, say hello to Aunt Bodie. Hi Bodie!" She says in a singsong voice, face against Indigo's with a smile. "Bodie, meet Indigo McCarthy. MJ's daughter. They needed a babysitter last minute so...here we are!"

Bodie tries not to let her face show exactly how not ideal this situation is. It feels a little like the time that Vanessa just showed up at home with Angus and, while that ultimately resulted in something very good, a baby isn't a puppy. And it's a baby her wife will give back to her parents at the end of the night, but Bodie can't help but feel a little bumrushed all things considered. In the context of this week... "Right. Here we are." She's smiling, but she's sure Vanessa can tell it's put-upon. She might not be pleased, but she'd feel like an asshole for letting her frustration upset an infant. "I'll be in the kitchen while you finish up in here." She turns on heel and leaves the room, very aware of Angus' wet, clumsy butt skidding out behind her.

Vanessa feels her stomach sink through the floor as she watches Bodie walk away. Inwardly she curses herself for not having the foresight to ask if Bodie would be okay with this. But it was only until later that night, and MJ needed someone... She glances down at the still very damp baby in her arms, entirely oblivious to the already tense air, still happily babbling and gnawing on Vanessa's finger. "Hey now, I'm gonna need that later, little lady!" Vanessa playfully scolds while walking out of the bathroom toward her bedroom. A quick change and diaper later, Vanessa enters the kitchen with Indigo in her arms still, and a ring of gummy keys firmly in the baby's mouth. Chewing with determination. Seating herself at the table, she looks to Bodie. "How were things over at West?" Maybe if they ignore the baby elephant in the room, things might not be so bad.

Bodie keeps herself busy by grabbing a towel from the laundry room and actually getting down on her knees to dry Angus before he makes the living room furniture smell like wet dog. Having him around sort of keeps her sane. She didn't ask for the responsibility of babysitting a kid, but the routine of dealing with her dog is familiar and comfortable. Once he's sorted, she slowly rises to her feet and sets the table. That's when Vanessa comes in with the baby, and Bodie bites the inside of her cheek for a moment. "Good. Busy." She uncovers Vanessa's plate and props her hip against the table, looking down at the model. "Are you hungry?"

Vanessa nods. "Yes. Famished. It's been a..." her voice suddenly gets singsongy once more as she looks at Indigo, "a very busy day of playtime with Angus on the beach!! Hmm?" Her gaze returns to Bodie’s, looking expectantly for her welcome home kiss.

Bodie flicks her eyes between Vanessa, the baby and back again, appraising. Finally, giving in, the chef leans down and presses a kiss to the model's lips. She pulls back just enough that their lips still touch when she says softly, "I love you." Then she kisses Vanessa again and stands, retrieves a fork and comes back, spearing a piece of asparagus and biting some off before holding the rest out in Vanessa's direction.

Vanessa feels a bit better with her wife's usual affection, and she can't fight the love drunk grin that forms at Bodie's playful offer of asparagus...that gets intercepted by a curious little hand that reaches for the spear before Vanessa can get to it. Gummy keys fall to the floor in favor of this exciting and strange new chew toy, and immediately Indigo begins to gnaw on it. "Oops?"

Bodie stares at the baby for a few seconds, a little dumbfounded, then looks back at Vanessa. The last thing she wants to do is fuck up someone /else's/ kid. Jesus. "Can babies even eat asparagus?" Blue eyes are a little owlish behind her glasses. "V, take it away from her."

Vanessa can't help but laugh a little at Bodie's concern, and she makes no move to take the asparagus from the baby, who has effectively turned one end of the vegetable into a gloopy mess. "Baby, relax, it's okay for a baby at her age to have some, yes. Can I get one now, please? Because it smells amazing, and little Indy here is making me jealous cuz she gets to enjoy it before I do!"

Bodie remains skeptical. There's a quirk to her brow as she watches the little brunette child do things to an asparagus spear she's never seen anyone do before. Her lip sort of half-curls for a second before she recovers and finally takes another piece onto a fork-- takes her own bite-- and offers the rest to her wife.

Vanessa happily accepts the asparagus with a wide eyed Indigo watching the exchange, staring as the long spear disappears bite by bite into Vanessa's mouth and down her long throat. Vanessa looks the baby in the eye with a loud "Mmmmmmmmmm!" and Indigo, fascinated with Vanessa's ability to eat the weird chew toy offers the half gnawed asparagus spear to the model. "Oh? You're letting me have it? Thank you, Indy!" Opening her mouth wide, she accepts the asparagus spear and nips down toward Indigo's little fist, kissing it loudly several times in a row. The baby squeals with delight. "MMMMmmmm that was so good! Aunt Bodie is the best cook in the entire world!" The baby continues to laugh, and Vanessa can't stop herself from giggling along with her. She offers Bodie an apologetic look.

Bodie knows her face is doing something really unattractive. Blanching, she can't quite watch Vanessa take a slobber-covered piece of asparagus with a neutral expression. So she lets them have their moment and turns away to pour herself a glass of wine. Downing the first pour quickly, she pours a second and then turns back to the pair at the end of the table. Glass in hand, she carefully forks a bite of cod and offers it to Vanessa.

Vanessa finds the whole scenario to be absolutely hilarious. Vanessa with a squirming one year old in her arms, and Bodie set on feeding Vanessa as though she were a one year old. She happily accepts the proffered morsel, and chews. "Mmm, ugh god this is so good." She's so spoiled with one of the best chefs in the country as a wife, and the occupant of her lap clearly sees that. Reaching with little fingers, Indy wants to find what Vanessa's just eaten. "Bodie, can you give Indy a little bite too, please?" As if on cue, the baby now looks at the chef.

Bodie takes a breath and swallows before licking her lips, slowly, and forking a small bite of perfectly cooked fish in the infant's direction. Indy opens her mouth and Bodie panics for a second, not wanting to jab someone else's child in the mouth with a fork, before oh-so carefully feeding the baby and smoothly (but quickly!) pulling the fork back. She releases the breath she didn't realize she was holding.

Vanessa beams at Indy as the baby happily chews and swallows. "There we go! Good girl, Indy! All gone!" Eyeing Bodie, Vanessa can't help but smile wider; proud of her wife for doing something she's sure Bodie wasn't particularly keen to. Holding up the baby up to a standing position so that her little feet are flat on Vanessa's thighs, the model playfully exclaims, "Thank you, Aunt Bodie!"

Bodie continues this odd tete-a-tete between herself, her wife and a friend's baby over and over again. And by the time she's washing the dishes and scooping a little bit of ice cream for dessert, she's convinced that both Vanessa and Indy actually ate more than she did. Which... go figure. But she finishes up her clean-up and takes the ice cream-- that she will, again, eat the least of-- into the living room to join the party on the couch. Where everyone is watchinnnng... "Is this really kid-friendly, baby?"

Vanessa glances up at her wife with a quizzical look, "It's just NatGeo. It's a bunch of cute little meerkats and--" All of the sudden one of the aforementioned meerkats is caught--and presumably eaten--by an African Wild Dog. Vanessa changes the channel before they can learn the meerkats fate. "Ooookay, point taken. Finding Nemo it is!" Scooting over so Bodie can sit, Vanessa begins to click through the Netflix menus, and Indy busies herself by gumming Vanessa's finger. Noticing the ice cream, Vanessa smiles. "Look Indy, Aunt Bodie brought us a little treat!"

Bodie assumes it's her fate to be the long suffering parental figure in this arrangement. Vanessa-- sweet, kind Vanessa-- has always been much more open and much more demonstrative of her sunshiney personality. It's one of the things that drew Bodie to her back in the very beginning... a genuine magnetism. But now it's costing her her ice cream. Bodie glances between her couch companions and sighs before offering the spoon in their general direction. She has no clue which mouth will clamp down on it first. "Are you sure they want you feeding their baby dairy and sugar?"

Vanessa tilts her head at the question. "I mean, she shouldn't eat that entire bowl, but a spoonful or two isn't gonna set her up with Type II Diabetes or anything." Taking the spoon, Vanessa slowly brings it to the baby's mouth. "Here it comes, open wide!" As the little girl does so, Vanessa too, opens her mouth, closing it as Indy clamps down on the little dollop of ice cream on the lip of the spoon. Catching the tiny bit that dribbles from the corner of Indy's mouth, Vanessa cleans the spoon herself and hands it back to Bodie. "Mmm so good!" Before she can gauge if the baby wants another, Indy lets out a yawn and nuzzles against Vanessa's chest. Within which Vanessa's heart melts into a puddle. Instinctively, her arms curl around the sleepy infant, cocooning her to Vanessa's body. Rocking the baby gently, Indy is out cold within minutes, and Vanessa lightly leans against her wife. "Look at her, baby...so sweet and innocent. She's been so good all day..."

Bodie eyes the sleeping child skeptically. Blue eyes finally rise to meet Vanessa's green. "She could have been a terror all day, and you'd say the same thing." Despite the argumentative statement, Bodie's voice is softer. Considerate. She knows that Vanessa loves this. She knows that. It didn't take seeing this all evening to know that. And Bodie's never not wanted to give her wife everything she loves. She just... She doesn't want to dwell on it and feel bumrushed again. She just wants to make Vanessa happy where she can. She tips her head to one side, resting against Vanessa's hair. "I know this makes you happy," she says softly, resting her free hand on her wife's knee.

Vanessa wants to add, ​"I wish it made you happy..."​ but she doesn't. She'll take whatever she can get in terms of Bodie's comfort level with their little guest. For now, with a warm slumbering infant in her arms, she's content curling up against her beloved wife, and relaxing--probably what Bodie's wanted to do all along. Turning her head, she presses a few kisses to the hollow of the Chef's throat, and remains gently pressed against the soft skin. She murmurs, "I love you." And she means it. Fully.

Bodie takes a deep, slow breath, relaxing into the couch and into the feeling of Vanessa's familiar body curled against her. This is nice. It's the first time since she came home that she's been able to feel... peaceful. Which is all she wanted. But Vanessa is happy, and the baby is sleeping. Angus is sprawled on the floor. She's got kisses. And hey! She's got her ice cream all to herself! "I love you, too, V. With my whole heart."