#and I come in on friday with a list of 50 things to do

[alter-q]

got called in to work the chillest shift ever, I love coming in at 3pm on a weekday bc a majority of the prep is done and I just make caesar salads for 5 hours. They also gave me Sunday off next week as a consolation for making me work right after therapy. Which is nice as hell bc we just split a Catholic alter and I'm sure she'd love to go to mass :)

[joelmillers-wife]

take my hand (joel miller x f!reader) chapter three

18+, MDNI series masterlist: here | please check this for complete series warnings and tags | 🎵series playlist pairing: joel miller x f!reader chapter summary: your patrol with joel takes a detour to find the next edition of Savage Starlight wc: 6.3k rating: this story is 18+ (minors, do not interact), there will be eventual smut in later chapters  chapter warnings and tags: moderate amount of violence, cursing and tlou lore accurate outbreak content below, TW: alludes to suicidal ideation (please feel free to message me or send me an ask about specifics if you want clarification before reading), angst, reader has no description besides she has hair, jackson!joel, age difference: reader is in her 30s and joel is in his 50s, sloooow burn, enemies to friends to lovers type-beat ao3 | follow @writtenbynic and turn on notifications for chapters! dividers made by: @saradika-graphics , check them out!

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III. ANOTHER LOVE

And if somebody hurts you, I wanna fight But my hand's been broken one too many times So I'll use my voice, I'll be so fucking rude Words, they always win, but I know I'll lose

Your patrol shifts ended up being every Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, with you on standby as extra help for Fridays—each day changing what time you were scheduled as well as the location. After your first patrol, you had anticipated a new partner, only to return the Wednesday after to see Joel still listed next to your name. Not just on that day, but almost every shift after. 

It shocked you at first. In your eyes, this was either because Tommy was forcing his brother to be your partner, or maybe Maria wanted to punish Joel.

“Ya know what it took me to convince Maria to let you stay in this damn town? What with her knowin’ everythin’ you’re capable of?”

You recall the conversation you had overheard between Tommy and Joel that morning. The way Tommy had scolded him for his lack of involvement with other people. How Joel dragged him away for another talk after you both had arrived back to Jackson, you assumed Joel yelled at Tommy to change partners. Considering your designated patrol partner for the near future, you settled on the idea that you were being forced to work with Joel as some form of punishment towards him.

But your confusion grew as time went on, because Joel wasn’t always your partner. If it wasn’t Joel, if he wasn’t available on a certain day for whatever reason, then it was Tommy—only ever Tommy and Joel. It felt odd, considering everyone else in town took turns rotating on who their partners were. It was common that the same groups would be together most of the time, but they all still had some changes every now and then. Not you, though—no. It only made things worse when people picked up on your pairings, and you learned that prior to you, Joel only ever went on patrols with his brother.

The question of how trusted you really were began to plague you. Maybe, on that first patrol, Joel saw something in you he didn’t like—something that he didn’t trust and had confided in his brother to keep an eye on you. 

That theory didn’t hold much proof to you, though. You had grown closer with Tommy, and Maria with him. Your occasional shifts with Tommy always went well—the two of you bonding over similar interests such as music, or Tommy talking about being a father and how Benjamin was like. You were invited for dinners every now and then at their house, were asked about your opinions on things going on in town or advice on what would best help the community. They made you feel valued. Were you really a liability if they were allowing you into their space so willingly?

It was almost a year of you being in Jackson with your second autumn here coming to end. You had grown somewhat used to the way things were around here and things felt like they had evolved for the better the more time you spent here. The only thing that never changed was Joel.

The two of you never engaged in small talk—all the information you knew about him was limited, and given to you by either Ellie or his brother. You’d see him around town, whether in the mess hall or at the shops, but all he ever offered was a brief glance in your direction with no greeting. Patrols were nothing out of the ordinary as you never encountered anything more than a few stray infected scattered around on their own, far away from Jackson. Your moments with Joel were the same—quiet. The most you ever got out of him was that he transitioned from grunting and scowling at everything you said to giving you nods, still accompanied by his usual frown. 

Progress.

You spent most of your time with Ellie as she still would go to you for quality time. The difference is that she stopped being shy about coming up with excuses to hang out, and instead would just show up to places you were and begin conversing with you. You also noticed Joel began expecting her to be where you were—looking for her in the stables or knocking on your door to check her whereabouts. For some reason, it meant something to you. The fact that you had become someone he was comfortable having his “kid” around. A part of you maybe wished he would find your presence somewhat… comfortable? Just enough to make moments like these a bit less awkward.

The morning weather today felt colder than recent, making you believe winter was approaching a bit faster than anticipated. The good news with the cold is that the infected were less likely to be out soon enough. Not because they feel anything, but because everyone else stays as sheltered and secluded as they can to stay safe, giving the infected no reason to wander off.

Today’s shift has been a typical routine that you and Joel have fallen into. Each time you still offer small comments to him with no response, but you stopped paying his reactions any mind.

The two of you had just cleared the outdoor shopping center, finding nothing more than two clickers in one of the stores when Joel spoke up.

“Area’s cleared,” he says before looking behind him to a small road that leads further into another town. Nodding his head in that direction, he says, “Let’s head into the next town over. Tommy told me he saw a comic book store up ‘ere. Wanna try and find the next volume in the series Ellie’s readin’.”

The idea warms your heart before you show slight hesitation. “Are you sure? That part’s way past anything we’re usually allowed to reach… I mean, Maria is in charge, and she is your sister-in-law so I figure they probably don’t mind you—”

Joel cuts you off firmly. “That’s right. They don’t mind. Now c’mon.”

Knowing there is no use in arguing with him, you silently follow his lead.

It takes you about half an hour to reach the town. Upon arriving, you are a bit surprised to see how much bigger the area is than you expected. The layout resembles a square with an empty park and courtyard in the center. Separated from the middle by roads, you see pet stores, abandoned restaurants, a tattoo shop, and more buildings along the perimeter. 

A quick glance around showed you that there was no immediate threat, but a part of you still felt anxious. While the land was wide, the arrangement of the shops made it so you felt you were trapped in a box—opening yourself up to anyone, or anything, that could be looking in.

Seemingly unbothered, Joel kept walking along the road before he found a tall and wide building—the comic book store. It looked to be about two floors tall based on what you could see through the molded windows, the dirt and destruction making it hard for you both to get a good view of what lies inside.

“Son of a—fuckin’...” You hear Joel saying. Bringing your attention to him, you see him frustratingly yanking on both of the door handles to the store. Getting no result, he slams his hand on the glass. “God damn fuckin’ doors jammed,” he says with a scowl on his face.

“Oh, um…” You trail off as you try to look around for another way in. You walk over to the neighboring store, a coffee shop, and take a look through the windows for any immediate danger. Finding no signs of infected, you look further back to notice that towards the back of the coffee shop, a door was slightly ajar—a door that was against the wall being shared with the comic book store.

You hear Joel huff back at the doors of the comic book store. “Whatever,” he mumbles to himself while looking at his feet. “Fuckin’ dumb idea anyways.”

You were stunned to see a tinge of sadness from him, and your heart hurt because you knew what was going on. It wasn’t so obvious that everyone in town knew, but if you spent enough time with Ellie you could tell that something was… off between the two of them. She found more excuses to be out with friends at school, and you’d assume Joel would become stricter because of it. The stereotype of a rebellious teenager being scolded by the overprotective father.

Yet he was always very lax when it came to it—letting her hang out as much as she wanted, being more lenient on curfews while also trying to make sure she stays safe. You could tell he was trying, and whatever it was that was happening between them, whatever had caused this very slight tension, he was trying to fix it. Realizing he potentially wanted to get her something to make her happy, you decide you want to help. 

Not for him, though. For Ellie of course.

“Hey,” you call out to grab his attention. “I see a door in the back of this place… It’s open and looks like it may lead into the comic book store,” you suggest while pointing towards the back side.

He comes up beside you and ducks down, looking into the window and following his eyes to where your finger was pointing. Your body shudders as his figure hovers over your shoulder. You take note that he’s closer than he’s ever been to you, his breath on your neck and his body heat making you feel warm all of a sudden. You clear your throat before standing up straight and taking a step away from him. 

“We could try and see if we can make it through there?” You offer.

Joel straightens up, looking down at you for a moment until his lips settle into a firm line and he gives you a nod in agreement.

The two of you are able to get the coffee shop door pulled open with a little bit of effort. The moment you step in, Joel pushes past you to reach the back door before you can. He holds up his gun before looking at you. Having done this routine with him before, you knowingly nod before mimicking his movements to position your own gun properly.

His hand reaches for the doorknob and twists it slowly, only for the both of you to be surprised at the fact it opened easily. Joel steps a foot across the doorway to enter into the comic book store, but the both of you simultaneously freeze when you hear it.

Clicking. Much more clicking than you recall having experienced together. 

Joel turns his head to look back at you with a brief look of worry in his eyes before putting a finger to his lips. You give a nod of understanding and tense up as you wait for him to fully open the rest of the door.

The building is a lot bigger than you anticipated. It feels more akin to one of those large grocery stores you had run into, except with two stories. The place was very open with wide aisles that were lined with rows and rows of not just comic books, but what seemed to be posters, DVDs, and vinyls. The center of the store had a very large circular area that you chalked up to be the check out area. The back of the store held a small stage with chairs thrown across it, as if this place held some kind of game night or community events at one point. In front of the stage were long tables with books scattered across—chairs surrounding the tables in an unorganized manner. A quick look upstairs showcased even more aisles of books and other items from what you could see.

Scattered amongst the store was infected—potentially thirty of them, but you couldn’t make out all of them with the boarded windows blocking the sunlight creeping in. They looked to be a group mixed with runners and clickers. The runners were bent over, curled into themselves twitching. The unnerving sounds of them groaning made your skin crawl—it was almost as if they were in pain. 

That’s something you had learned from the shitty government teachings the quarantine zones would give people at the start of the outbreak. To their understanding, the beginning stages of the Cordyceps infection, the runners, were alive. Their minds overtaken by the fungus, driving them mad with a desire to continue growing the fungus. Humans trapped with poisoned minds and unable to control themselves. 

Sometimes that’s why you think they make the sounds they do—it’s as if they’re crying out in pain.

The sounds from runners don’t fill you with the same sense of fear as the clickers do. The third stage of the infection has caused their brains to split open as the fungus grows outside of their body—making them blind and reliant on sound. The eerie clicking noises they make being their only source to know what is going on around them through echolocation.

You’ve dealt with this many infected before. You’ve seen, handled, and killed more than your fair share of clickers. You’ve done this before. You’ve done this on your own. You can do it with Joel.

The two of you quietly step through the door, standing next to each other and watching for any signs that your presence has been made known. Seemingly in the clear, Joel looks to you before pointing to one side of the store. He then points to himself while gesturing to the other side of the store—the two of you in understanding of how to go about this.

You both silently pull out your individual knives, crouching and walking as quietly as possible over to your respective areas. The first infected you come up to is a runner with its position making it so that you walk up on its left side. With a silent swiftness, you lunge up and grab it by its throat with your left arm, holding it in a headlock. Before it’s able to screech out in warning, you bring the knife up to its right temple, sinking your weapon into it as you hear a sickening squelching sound. As you feel its struggling stop, you slowly lower its body onto the floor so as to not make a loud sound that alerts the others. 

Reaching the end of that aisle, you take a moment to look over to Joel’s side to check on him and find his eyes already on your figure. He holds a firm and cold look in his eyes, but you see something else in him that you aren’t given the chance to figure out. The two of you give each other a quick once-over, and you share a nod before continuing the same routine throughout the store.

After a good amount of time, the two of you were able to clear the entire store quietly and without causing chaos. Joel walks up to you and whispers, “You alright?” 

Your voice matching his, you reassure him that you are. A flash of relief passes over his face before he looks around. “Think we got ‘em all. Don’t see or hear anythin’ else… I checked upstairs too,” he says out of breath.

Speaking at a more normal volume, you say, “Guess we gotta go find that comic book now.” 

He looks at you and huffs out what sounds like it could be a laugh. “Yeah… Let’s get on that.” 

After he shares the name of the book he is looking for, you part ways to silently search different areas of the store to find the book. You recognize the title, Savage Starlight. You’ve been hearing recaps of it from Ellie after she finished each one she had found. 

You search your section of the first floor with no luck and climb up the broken escalator to the top floor. You scan through about five more aisles before you feel as though this store won’t have what it is you are looking for. Off to one side of the upper floor you spot signs for some restrooms in a corner, in front of it lies giant broken wooden beams that are stacked on top of each other. You take a quick glance up to see a piece of the ceiling has fallen and covers a section of aisles you had not checked out yet. 

Walking up to it, you struggle to read what is held on the row as so much dust and debris covers the space–your body twisting as you try to peek through the pieces of wood to look at the shelves. You decide to pull out your flashlight from your backpack and try to shine light through whatever pieces of the row that were not covered. When you hit the third row, you smile.

No fucking way.

Your smile growing, you lean over the railing on the second floor. “Hey, Joel, guess what I found?”

He hurries up the escalator and makes his way over to stand beside you as you shine your flashlight through the cracks of the beams. His eyes spot what you found when the light settles on the words Savage Starlight. 

“Well, I’ll be damned,” he says. For the first time since you’ve been to Jackson, he smiles. A real, full smile. The only person who’s smile was contagious to you has been Ellie—yet you’ve never felt the way you do right now seeing Joel smile.

“Looks like this part of the building fell and the beams covered it. I just need your help moving them in order to reach the books if that’s alright,” you share, scanning your gaze up to the ceiling as you look over the beams. You see Joel nod in your peripheral and turn to see him looking at you, still smiling, but it’s a more distracted smile. You stare back at him for a moment, your heart stuttering from the intensity of his gaze before starting to move the wooden beams out of the way.

Joel quickly takes over by moving some of the larger pieces of wood out of the way first. “I got it. Been doin’ shit like this for years before the outbreak. Used to be a contractor,” he says. That was something you had known about him already as Tommy had told you stories about that part of their lives before the outbreak. But it’s the first bit of information that you’ve heard about Joel, directly from Joel.

Another thing you learned about Joel was something that you had noticed when you first saw him. It was that scar on the right side of his temple. You hadn’t paid it any mind until Ellie had talked about it one day when ranting on how he never listens to her.

“He got shot, they missed, and now he has that scar. He says that’s the reason why he can’t hear me that well sometimes, but really I think that’s just him covering up for getting old.” 

The little bit of information made moments with Joel make a little more sense. You’d notice that he’d always ride his horse with you on his left side, leaving his good ear to hear anything important from you. Or when you would point out a noise, he’d always angle his head so that he was able to catch the sound a bit more clearly on his left ear. Knowing that about him just helped you understand his habits a bit more.

Which is why you understand how he doesn’t hear it.

He’s crouched over moving a particularly large wooden beam out of the way when he bangs it loudly against the other beams, an echo following the sound as the pieces clang together. The restroom doors you saw earlier were a few feet to his right, leaving his body angled so that his back is to the doors. With his right ear facing the bathroom, his left ear was only picking up the sounds of the wood moving and the building creaking. 

As you went to lay a piece of wood against the wall, you heard a clatter from the restroom. You almost didn’t catch it with the sound being so slight. You squint in the direction, not hearing any other noise for a moment. Suddenly, the bathroom door bangs open and you watch as a clicker screeches and rushes out heading straight towards the noise it heard—straight towards Joel.

You don’t have a chance to think before you yell out Joel’s name, trying to run over to him to reach him before it can. You briefly see him turn around, catching that his movements become quicker after his right ear wasn’t the one facing the bathroom. You push him out of the way, towards one of the reading tables lined across the railing of the second floor. 

All you could hear is that clicking noise that never fails to make you nauseous before you realize you succeeded in moving Joel out of the way. Instead, the clicker lunges at you, forcing you and it to topple to the ground with it landing on top of you. It makes a particularly loud screech and rapid clicking before its head rears back for a moment before diving towards you. Just in time, you take a stronger grip on the small piece of wood you were about to throw to the side before, and shove the wood in front of your neck. 

Too scared to look, you close your eyes and hold your breath until you hear the crunch of wood as it bites down rabidly into the beam. There’s suddenly the sound of scrambling to your left and the sound of a gun being drawn before you hear a loud bang, the clicking noise twisting into garbled cries. You simultaneously feel something warm and sticky spray across your face, followed by the collapsing pressure of a body onto your chest before being pushed off.

You finally open your eyes to see the clicker’s corpse laying on your right side before looking at the wooden beam you were holding in your hand where you noticed teeth marks sunk deep into it. A loud ringing in your ears engulfs your senses.

No fucking wonder Joel went mostly deaf in his right ear.

You drop your head back against the floor with a deep exhale of breath as your muscles sag with relief. You’re alive. You’re not bit.

The moment of relief ends sharply as you feel your body being roughly pulled up—your eyes slightly glazed over as you try to focus on the cause of the sudden movement you endured. You quickly blink away the fog from your eyes in an effort to focus on the outlined figure standing before you. 

Joel. Joel is in front of you. His face is so close to yours that if you moved an inch, your noses would touch. His brown eyes are wide, brows furrowed as always but it was different. It wasn’t out of anger or annoyance… It almost looked like fear. Pure fear.

Your eyes continue to move across his face before you realize his lips were moving. How long has he been talking?

His lips seem to be forming the same word over and over again. Oh… He’s saying your name. You hear it now.

Slowly, the ringing subsides and your brain begins to process what is happening. 

“Thought you said to always call out before you take a shot so close to someone’s face.”

He doesn’t seem to find your comment funny, or maybe he just didn’t register it. More of your senses are coming back when you begin to feel pain and look down to see Joel harshly gripping both of your arms whilst shaking you to get your attention. Slowly looking back up to his face, you notice his lips moving again.

Fuck. He was still talking.

“Are you okay?” Joel frantically asks. He repeats your name before demanding, “Are you okay?”

You finally nod but he doesn’t seem satisfied. His eyes look over your body as he begins frantically pushing your sleeves up before reaching to pull the collar of your jacket away from your neck. “Are you bit? Did it bite ya? Are you okay?”

You brush off his hands before bending down to hold up the wooden beam. God, who knew he could be so touchy. “Threw this in front of me just in time. It bit this, not me. I’m fine, I’m not bit.”

His wide eyes look between the piece of wood and you��back and forth, back and forth with that same bit of fear in his eyes that you feel like you’ve seen a lot of today.

“Don’t worry,” you try to reassure.

What you intended to be soothing words seem to have the opposite effect on him. Upon hearing what you say, you see his eyes freeze on yours and watch that fear dissipate and turn into anger. It wasn’t just the usual anger you’ve experienced from him—that typical annoyed anger. No… this was something you hadn’t seen before. 

This anger… It’s not like you think he would hurt you. No part of you thinks that. But you’re realizing that he is capable of something much darker than what he lets on around most—something that Maria seemed to already be hesitant about.

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

What?

“What?” You ask. His voice isn’t that loud in volume but it still makes you flinch. He speaks with a tone that only comes out of people when they are so angry they can’t see straight.

“The fuck were you thinkin’?! Jumpin’ in front of me like that… Pushin’ me over. You could’ve gotten yourself fuckin’ killed.”

You take a second to process his words. He’s right, you could’ve died… But you didn’t. And if you hadn’t acted as quickly as you did, he would have died.

And Ellie would be alone.

“I heard and saw it before you did, Joel. Your back was to it… You wouldn’t have reacted in time. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t—”

Joel cuts you off. “That ain’t your fuckin’ job now is it? You can’t be actin’ so goddamn reckless and throwin’ yourself in front of danger so often. It’s stupid.”

His voice shocks you. His words shock you—how much venom he holds in them. You’re realizing just now how much he really hates you.

So you fight back.

“What the hell was I thinking…? I told you I’m fine. I wasn’t bit so who cares?” You say, your voice increasing in volume. 

Joel seems taken aback for a split second before something dark flashes in his eyes. “I care. So why the fuck don’t you?”

You aren’t given a chance to react as you watch his face twist up in even more anger before shifting into some sort of sick humor. Except he doesn’t yell this time. He laughs to himself. “God… I was fuckin’ right about you.”

You feel your heart drop to your stomach, but he’s not done talking. 

“All this damn time you've just been breezin’ through life, huh? Come into town, fit right in, make god damn fuckin’ cookies with your neighbors, make friends with all the people in town, and probably hold your little fuckin’ book clubs every Sunday. And Tommy, my idiot little brother, sticks you with me to make me babysit ya on patrol when you haven’t encountered any real threats. You just get to go out, see the fuckin’ scenery, come home and sleep in your nice warm bed without a fuckin’ worry in the world. And here, today, you’re faced with one single real world problem, and you just act completely fuckin’ reckless.”

You stand there, taking in his words as you silently seethe in anger while his chest moves up and down rapidly as he finishes his rant. You don’t respond right away, blinking a few times and looking around before you finally speak.

“Is that what you think of me?” You softly say at first. He doesn’t show any reaction or sign that he has an answer, besides his mouth settling into a firm line. “You think I’m just some kid don’t you—”

“Oh, believe me, I know you ain’t a kid—”

“Really? Then why the fuck do you keep treating me like one?!” You snap.

You notice the anger on his face flicker as his furrowed brows twitch briefly.

Your voice grows louder as you continue. “All you’ve done since I fucking got here is treat me like a child. The way you look at me, the way you treat me, the patronizing, fucking tone you use when you’re forced to actually talk to me…” You trail off as your chest rises and falls harshly to catch your breath as the words rush out of you.

Your face screws up in anger. “I heard you, you know? Talking to Tommy before our first patrol.”

Joel’s frown deepens in confusion before realization settles over his face causing his scowl to relax a bit. “Yeah,” you bitterly say. “I heard you. I wasn’t gonna get in between a conversation with you and your brother back then, but for fuck’s sake Joel… If you hated me that much, then why didn’t you try to further convince him to get you off patrol with me? When we got back I know you talked to him about getting me off the schedule with you.”

At that, Joel’s face turns back to confusion as if what you said is wrong. You don’t take a break to focus on that though as you continue with your own argument. 

“Do you just have this idea that you are the only person who has ever experienced horror in this world? To even think it was possible for me to get as far as I did without a single scratch on me? Seriously? That’s realistic to you?” You huff out angrily, waving your hands around in fury.

“You say that you know I’m not a fucking kid, right? You know that means the outbreak happened after I was born. Meaning my whole world and fucking family fell apart the same way it did for you,” your voice breaks. “I lived through the past two decades in this hell. I fucking lost people and saw horrifying things. I have fought countless of those fucking things every damn day before I stepped foot into Jackson. I was alone for months, surviving on my own. Fighting on my own. Doing everything on my own to keep myself alive until I came here.”

You feel tears well in your eyes and furiously brush them away, frustrated with yourself for letting yourself cry in front of him. Recalling the anxieties you felt when you first arrived in Jackson last year, you say, “Ya know… The first thing I felt when stepping foot into Jackson wasn’t comfort—it was fear. Fear of how normal everything seemed. Fear of being too loud in the streets… Wondering how the hell people could do it without worrying about infected hearing and running in. I mean, god… I haven’t had a full night’s sleep for the year that I’ve been here, despite how much it may seem like I’ve acclimated. I can’t even rest without having one eye constantly open, looking at the door and jumping at every noise I hear in my own home.”

“I did it all on my own, because I don’t have anyone. There’s no one back home that would care if I returned dead or alive. There hasn’t been someone for years. But you? You have people, Joel. So, I’m sorry if my reaction seemed reckless to you, okay? Maybe… Maybe I unconsciously did it because I haven’t really cared about surviving an infected encounter or not for the past decade.”

Joel takes a sharp inhale hearing that. Hearing the crack in your voice as you speak, his face flinching as he stands there with his usual frown. 

“The difference between you and me is you have people that care. Your brother? Ellie? Fucking… God, Joel… that little girl depends on you for everything and talks about you like you hung the fucking moon. You can’t leave that. So, I’m sorry that you just see me as some dumb kid, but no one depends on me back home. The least I could do is fucking make sure that the people who depend on you can see you again.”

You notice your body's reaction to your words when you finally stop speaking—how your throat hurts from yelling, how your body is shaking from anger, how your chest is rapidly moving in an effort to catch your breath.

Done talking, you take the moment to properly look at Joel—he doesn’t look completely angry anymore. In fact, you can’t tell what expression he has. His brows are pushed together in a frown, but raised ever so slightly in what looks like it could be surprise. His eyes are dark, but not cold. You don’t know if you’d call that a warm look, but it’s different from the cold ones you’re so used to seeing—the ones you saw a moment ago after you told him to not worry. 

His mouth goes between being held in a firm line to opening every few seconds as if he wants to say something but can’t. Looking down, you see his fists opening and closing tightly like he’s trying to calm himself down.

The two of you stare at each other for a moment longer before you become fed up. He doesn’t care about what you say, you realize. He probably didn’t even listen—still thinking about how to scold you even more for your actions from a few minutes ago.

Scoffing, you reach over to move the last wooden beam and grab the novel that you two had come here for. You shove it into his chest. “Here’s your fucking comic. I’m going home.”

In your peripheral, you see Joel standing there holding the comic to his chest and watching you walk away. You can’t find it in you to care to wait on him. 

You make your way down the escalator and back out the way you guys had entered, marching straight to your horse after leaving the building. Without hesitation, you hop on and head back for Jackson, leaving Joel behind.

A few minutes into the journey, you hear the sounds of Joel behind you somewhere along the way as he finally catches up to you, but you don’t pay him any mind. He stays a few feet behind you, silently letting you lead the way.

Hours later, you reach Jackson and wait for the guards to open the gates for you both. The moment you ride in, you notice Tommy at the gates walking towards you both. He seems to take in your current state as you see concern wash over him.

“Are you okay? Did you guys have a tough run in?”

Joel looks to you before opening his mouth to respond to Tommy, but you cut him off before he had the chance. “We’re fine. Couple stragglers but we had it handled,” you say. Tommy looks between you and Joel with an uneasy look on his face. “Seriously, we’re good.”

“Well… Alright then. You let me know if you need anythin’, okay?” Tommy offers.

You nod and begin to walk your horse back to the stables. Tying her up, you check to see that Joel has gone before you walk over to Tommy.

“I can’t go on patrols with Joel anymore.”

Tommy’s face flinches with surprise. “What? The hell happened out there? You sure you’re okay?”

“I already said I’m fine,” you respond firmly. “I’m sorry to ask you to change things so suddenly, I just… I can’t go on patrols with Joel anymore. Please, Tommy.”

Tommy hesitates briefly and looks as if he considers pushing on the subject. Having heard the pleading in your voice, he seems to decide against it and gives you a nod. “Alright. I’ll get it changed. I’m gonna give you the rest of the week off, though. Let you take care of yourself for a bit and give us time to rearrange things. Does that sound good?”

You nod without a word before walking back home. The moment you reach your block, you see Joel standing outside his front yard with Ellie who is jumping up and down. Trying to remain unseen, you book it to your place and get about halfway up the walkway before you hear your name being called.

Turning around, you see Ellie making a run for you before she collides with you in a hug. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She yells.

You force out a tight smile before pulling her away. “What are you thanking me for?”

She looks back to Joel and pulls up the comic book in her hand. “Joel said you helped him get this for me!”

You look up to see Joel standing there watching you with a shy expression. It feels odd, seeing the normally stoic and cold man you’ve come to know appear so disarmed and uncomfortable.

Looking back down at Ellie, you say, “It’s no worries. Honestly, it was all him. I’m just glad you get to have another in the series.”

Ellie looks as though she wants to continue talking, so you cut her off. “I need to go inside, get washed up. I’ll see you around maybe,” you tell her before walking straight into your house. You wince to yourself as you ignore the look of confusion and disappointment on her face. You just need to get away from them, from him, as soon as possible.

God, what the fuck is wrong with you?

reblogs and comments are appreciated! i hope you all enjoy <3 a/n: hope you guys enjoy :) next chapter will be out saturday april 26th! i also was asked by a few people to be tagged, so here you go! if anyone else wants to be tagged then please let me know! @dendulinka6 @suzysface @koshkaj-blog @orcasoul @emmasveinyahhdih @thatoneperson38747

[sunflowers4life]

Marauders - Moving In - Part 3

heres part 3! i hope you enjoy. warning, female reader. i will try and get the next part out soon!

pairing: marauders x reader, moments with all three in this one

part 1 part 2

 It had been roughly a month since you had moved into the apartment, and you had 0 regrets. Currently, it is Friday. AKA, ‘Designated movie night.’ Every Friday, the 4 of you would each bring some sort of snack, and you would watch a movie, as a roommate bonding activity. There was a roster, which James had decorated like a toddler would, filled with sparkles, glitter and stickers that hung on the wall. So this week, movie night was your choice. That Friday, the 3 boys were out of the house, Remus and James being at university, whilst Sirius had a rehearsal with his band. So then, what did you spend the day doing?

Creating the ultimate movie night experience. Alone, you created your own list, with three things to do. 1, create a pillow fort of kings. 2, hang up fairy lights. 3, the most important, create the most elaborate drinks anyone had ever seen. And what movie had you chosen for such a night? The ultimate movie, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. After setting up the fort, which filled the entire living room, the floor was covered in assorted blankets and pillows, including 4 stuffed animals. A deer, a black dog, a wolf, and finally, a giraffe. 

The deer was a gift from James. A little while ago, you both had the night free, and James had suggested travelling to a nearby fair! It was filled with a pirate ship, a roller coaster, assorted food trucks and carnival games, and in the middle - a large, glowing ferris wheel. With potato twisters in hand, and a few tickets under your sleeves, James dramatically stopped in front of a toss the ball game. Noticing he had stopped, you turned around, and you quickly noticed James' eyes were not on the game itself, but the large deer plushie hanging. It could only be won if all 4 balls successfully landed in the bucket without falling out. He quickly turned, and you swear to god, the man in front of you had turned into a puppy, the way his lip was just pushed out in a pout, the sparkle of his eyes, you could essentially see his tail wagging. 

30 minutes later, missing about 50 tickets, James finally got his hand on the deer. With a cheer, you were quickly swept up in a hug, before he turned to you, and placed the deer in your hand. Quickly, you shoved your head into the deer, trying to hide the red that was slowly incasing your face.

The black dog was from Sirius. After one of his concerts at the local pub, you had been the only one to make it that night, as James and Remus had assorted plans. Sirius did his usual address of appreciation, before stepping off stage, and pulling you along, grabbing your hand. He pulled you out of the pub quickly, eager to make his way before the crowd excited the pub. Truly, his reputation was growing, and the pub was becoming more and more packed as the weeks went on. Sirius had yet to let go of your hand, and you had realised the three were just very physically affectionate people. Sirius pulled you over to the park nearby, and the two of you sat on the swings in the park for nearly 2 hours. Sweet conversation ensued, with talks of dreams, life plans, and random questions made the night perfect. That was, until Sirius suddenly took his backpack off, pulling out a fluffy stuffed animal. He offered it to you, pushing it into your hands. “I found it at one of my shows. It was just left behind. I made sure to wait a week, in case someone had accidentally left it, but no one had come back for it. So, I thought you’d appreciate it.” As the stars twinkled through the night, the three of you made your way home. Snuggling into the covers, with a deer on one side and a wolf on another, you felt like the luckiest girl alive.

Finally, the wolf  was from Remus. It came after the book club Remus had got you to attend with him. Every Tuesday, at 5, you would meet at a bookshop, and right next door with a toy shop. You decided whilst Remus was purchasing a book, to enter the cute store. You saw it every time, and finally, you got to investigate it. Quickly, your eyes were attracted to the brown wolf, who was sitting alone on the shelf. The place was a second hand toy store, and you noticed the little wolf had small scratches across it, that had been hand stitched with love. You felt a presence behind you, and Remus, in his cosy sweater, and his sweet caramel eyes turned from you to the little wolf on the shelf. You went to leave the store, before Remus quickly told you to wait. Grabbing the wolf off the shelf, and approaching the register, he purchased the animal, before carrying it home, and setting it right in the middle of your bed, in between the deer and the dog. Remus had given you a light kiss to the head before exiting your room, and you couldn’t help but feel flattered.

But, where did the giraffe come from? The giraffe was a joint gift from the 3 of them, when it came to your ‘one month roommate anniversary!’ James had decorated the apartment in your favourite colour, with a cake decorated, a table set with 8 seats. 4 seats from you, James, Remus and Sirius, one for Prongs, the deer, one for Padfoot, the dog, and one for Moony, the wolf. In the last seat was a giraffe. Pastel yellow with brown spots, you immediately fell in love, before naming it Twinkle, a name the 3 had taken to calling you. The night was spent in a tea party, something you had expressed dreams of doing since your childhood, when you would set up a table with your stuffed animals and have fake tea parties.

Back to the present, the afternoon was then spent preparing snacks. You grabbed 4 Cadbury bars, resealing them in Wonka themed wrappers. Brownies, cookies, pretzels, chips, and finally, pizza’s ready to be placed in the oven, you were sure if it existed, you would win the trophy for the best movie night yet. The three entered at the same time, where you sat in the middle of the fort, with the snacks set up ready to be enjoyed. It was a great night, and at the end Remus was pressing his fingers to his lips, trying to shush James and Sirius antics, as you lightly snored in his arms. In your arms were the 4 stuffed animals, and your head rested just in the middle of his chest. Carrying you to bed, tucking you and your friends to sleep, the three shared a look, before retiring to their own.

[colorisbyshe]

Now that we’re seeing $80 (????!!!???) video games, let me just reminded everyone that if you wishlist your games, you’ll get alerts for when they’re on sale digitally

But also:

Dekudeals tracks video game sales, both digital and physical, and you can even adjust alerts so you’ll only get notified for specific prices or discounts (so say when an $80 is 60% off or whatever else you want). It shows historic deals for every game, so you can learn what an average sale for that game looks like or compare the price to an all time low.

IsThereAnyDeal is a PC Game specific website that does the same thing and lists multiple game sellers so you’re not just checking Steam or GOG or whatever.

And indeed I recommend not just checking websites like steam for PC games but instead looking at humble bundle/choice, cdkeys, fanatical, or gamebillet. Before buying a game key, make sure it’s from a reputable place.

Websites like Newegg or stores like Costco often sell gift cards at a discount, so you can buy discounted games with “cheaper” money (ie getting a $50 gift card for $40 and then using that $50 GC to buy an $80 game on sale for $50, if that makes sense)

Be patient. STOP PREORDERING GAMES! Do not reward these companies before the games have even been properly reviewed and protect yourself by waiting for a discount.

Learn when sales tend to happen (like golden week for Japanese games, Black Friday, the seasonal steam sales which are often mirrored by the consoles, days of play for Sony, etc). If you want a game from a specific franchise, see if an anniversary is coming up and see if the games tend to go on sale for the holiday.

Nintendo games tend to go on sale less. Ubisoft games tend to go on steep sales quickly. Learn about these companies, knowledge is power.

Check out subreddits like patient gamers or PlayStation sales or whatever. Look into giveaways. Etc etc

[growandrecover]

Heyyy, me again! First of all I'd like to thank you for all your replies so far.

Second of all, I'd like to ask if you know of any communities centered around ED recovery. I know of two subreddits, but of them are... really bad. One is not recovery focused and is mostly overrun by pro-ana teenagers who are looking for advice for continuing their self harming behaviour. The other is recovery focused but every post is manually approved by mods and the mods approve like...5 % of posts and you aren't allowed to talk about anything slightly upsetting, even though there's a whole trigger warning flair so idk what's up with that. I feel like there's strength in community and while most of the members of my DBT group have some sort of eating disorder as well, it isn't really the focus of the sessions and we are discouraged from talking about it because not everyone is stable in their recovery.

Third of all, is it normal for extreme hunger to come in waves? I've always heard about it as like...this thing you get for a week or two straight and then you're alright, but after a while of starting recovery, I got extreme hunger for like two days and then nothing. And after a few weeks it was like a day again. Last week I didn't feel hungry nearly at all and didn't eat much, and this week I've feeling super ravenous. Like since Monday I've been feeling like a starving beast of some sort dhdhhdhsb. It isn't even necessarily physical hunger, like, yeah, sure, that too, but sometimes I feel dizzy and hungry and like I'm starving even though there's no physical pain in the stomach area.

Hey!! My deepest apologies for taking so long to respond. Life has been kind of hectic around here 🥲

I did some googling and here's what I found as far as groups go:

(As far as I know, they're all free. I went through all the registries and looked for payment options, and there were none. I haven't used any of them myself, though. I believe most of these take place in the US, so if you're not American, just let me know *if you're comfortable doing so, of course* and I'll look for more!! I did find a few that were taking people from all over the world, and one just for those residing in the UK and one for Australians.)

Eating Recovery Center: This one has a lot of different groups, though you can only be registered for one at a time. They're virtual meetings. I'm not certain if it's limited to those who live in the states or not, but if you live there, you should be able to access it.

Center For Discovery: This one also has a lot of different groups. They're virtual as well.

National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders: This one only has 2 groups, one for those with the disorder, and another for family members.

Project Heal: This one is a list of 30 different groups, separated by category (high-weight and larger bodies, body liberation, lgbtq+, neurodivergent, bipoc, clinicians in recovery, age specific, general support, Spanish speaking, male identifying, meal support, and support for family and friends)

National Alliance for Eating Disorders: Virtual meetings, but not as many categories. If you live in the states, there are a few in person meetings as well. Led by therapists.

The Eating Disorder Foundation: Virtual as well. Lots of different options as far as groups go. (Family and friends, people experiencing binge behaviors, trans and nonbinary, individuals 18+, individuals 50+, neurodivergent, both virtual and in person for lgbtq+ people 18 and older, individuals 30+, individuals 13-17, art journaling, health professionals in recovery, and several other in person groups.)

Beat Eating Disorders: Solely for people in the UK. These are chat rooms. (General support, bulimia support, BED support, anorexia support, ARFID support)

The Lotus Collaborative: Meets on Zoom every Friday 3:00 pm to 3:50 pm PST. Anyone who is working on their recovery journey is welcome to join.

Butterfly Foundation: I believe this is solely open to Australians. However, if you just so happen to live there, they have both virtual and web chat options.

Eating Disorders Anonymous: This one has both in person and Zoom meetings for people who live all over the world. They are location specific, but there are many options.

Eating Disorder (Ana, BED, Mia, & EDNOS) Recovery Support Group *through Facebook*: I'm not a member of this group, but it looks like it shouldn't be harmful. However, since it's private, I sent a request to join to make sure it won't be triggering. I'll delete it off this list if it is. The rules that lead me to believe that it won't be harmful are as follows: "1. No numbers: All numbers related to weight, food, exercise, measurements, etc must be replaced by x/xx/xxxx. 2. No bullying whatsoever. Bullies will be immediately banned without a warning. 3. All pictures must go in the comment section of your post! Selfies and body shots are not allowed! 5. This group is NOT a pro ed group or a pro self harm group. If you support those, this group is not for you." There are 33k members.

Project Heal: This one was already mentioned, but I just wanted to single it out because it's specifically for meal support.

Balance Eating Disorder Treatment Center: This group is titled "Virtual Contemplating Recovery Free Eating Disorder Support Group". They state that if you're asking yourself things like, "Am I sick enough? Do I even have an eating disorder? Can I fix this on my own? Will I ever know a life without the obsession?" you'd be a great fit for this meeting. They meet twice a month at no cost. There is an international option if you're not in America. I wasn't sure if you'd need this one or not, but I wanted you to have the option.

Ana, Mia, and EDNOS Recovery Support Group *through Facebook*: Again, I requested to join this group to be sure it wouldn't be triggering. I'll delete it off the list if it is. There are 27k members. This one has very similar rules to the first one.

(If these weren't what you were looking for, I got a lot of area specific ones in my search *not included in this list*. So if you were to search, you may find some for those who live near you. I searched "eating disorder recovery forum", "eating disorder support forum", "eating disorder support group online", and "anorexia recovery support groups")

Update: I just got into the first group (they seem to work very quickly) and scrolled through the posts a little bit. Everyone looks to be pretty mindful and helpful as well! If you have Facebook, I'd recommend this one!!

To answer the third part of your ask:

My extreme hunger was terrible. Oh my gosh, it was just absolutely wild. I know exactly what you mean when you say you feel like a starving beast. Mine went on for a few months, if I'm remembering correctly. I remember getting it around October, and it stayed until January -ish? It got so much worse around the holidays 😫. However, I think it's different for everyone.

I remember looking it up and found this (I found it again when I looked it up just now lol) : RecoveryWarriors.com

In case you don't feel like reading it, the author says, "It was the oddest feeling. My stomach might feel full, but I feel an innate calling to keep eating. And eating. And eating. I'd consume huge amounts of food at once and still scrounge for more." She goes on to say, "Extreme hunger is not something everyone recovering from a restrictive eating disorder will experience. However, most will. When you'll experience it and for how long differs, but it is usually a (scary) part of the recovery process."

She continues a little bit later,

"However, it may take quite a while for your hunger levels to go back to 'normal'. There's no way of knowing how long extreme hunger will last. For some people, they may only experience it for a few weeks. Other people may find themselves in a state of extreme hunger for months on end. Or, you may never experience extreme hunger." (Why Can't I stop Eating!: The Truth About Extreme Hunger, Savala)

This article by Registered Dietician, Shena Jaramillo, called Extreme Hunger in Eating Disorder Recovery explains what causes it, the signs, how to manage it, provides coping tools, and might help to answer your question a little bit further.

I hope this was at least somewhat helpful!! Let me know how the groups go (only if you want to, of course) and I'll be sure to check back in when I get into the 2 on Facebook :) 💗

[sprout-writes-stuff]

Inspired by @henderdads fic. A little thing that entered my brain fully formed and had to come out. (if I did anything wrong here let me know and I'll take it down)

It's not exactly what Steve thought he'd be doing on a friday night, he and Robin have their laptops open doing a personality quiz that the school heavily encouraged them to take.

He highly doubts a few questions (okay so there's at least 50, whatever) will tell him anything about himself that he didn't already know but Robin insisted they do it together. The part that actually interests Steve is they'll get a list of the ten people they're most compatible with, it'll even say whether that's in a romantic way or not. The last question asks about their preference (Men/Women/Any/None).

Early sunday morning Steve is lying in bed scrolling his emails and it's there! The results. He skims over all the stuff about him (he'll make a great parent someday, blah blah blah, maybe he'll read it properly later) until he finds the list. Unsurprisingly, Robin is at the top with 98.2% but the second... What? No way?

He video calls Robin immediately, it actually takes three tries to wake her up.

"Steve? It's," she looks up to the time on her phone, "7:18. Why? It's sunday."

"The email, Robin, it's here." He watches her face as she tries to understand what's happening, barely containing his amusement at that, and then waits as she checks hers.

"Aww we're compatible Stevie," she says with a silly, overly sweet smile, "like we didn't know that already. Who'd you get first with a heart?"

Steve now has his open on his laptop, staring at the little pink heart next the name second on his list.

"Steve?"

"It's... I mean, it can't be right."

"Why not? It got us didn't it?"

"It's Eddie Munson. 97.6%." The rest are all mid 80s or lower and might as well be zero for all Steve cares about them right now. Robin's jaw drops.

"He doesn't exactly seem the type to even take the quiz," she says, "you have to talk to him tomorrow."

"I don't know anything about him."

"Well you've got all the time in the world to find out."

He doesn't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day.

He sees Eddie's van pull into the parking lot and Robin pushes him towards it before the engine is even off.

"Can I talk to you?" he asks as soon as the door is open. "Privately?"

"Alright," Eddie says, confusion on his face as he follows Steve away from everyone else. "What's this about Harrington?"

"The quiz? The other night?" Did Eddie think Steve was just going to leave it?

"Oh, that's in already?" He digs his phone out of his pocket. He doesn't know.

Steve watches him read, getting more and more nervous as he gets closer to the end. Eddie looks up at him in shock. All Steve can do is nod.

"And the... heart? That's not a mistake?" He's kind of breathless.

"Huh?"

"Like, you could have accidentally checked men instead of women and that's what you came to tell me."

"Oh," Steve says with a giggle, "no, I'm bi."

The nervous energy from a few minutes ago is turning into bubbling excitement as they stare at each other, both with tentative, hopeful smiles.

"I don't know about you but I really wanna kiss you." Steve says, stepping closer. Eddie bridges the gap and their lips meet. Before they can get too into it, the school bell rings and they have to start heading to class.

"Can't believe we got each other at the top of our lists," Eddie says knocking his shoulder into Steve's.

"Hate to break it to you but you're number two on mine," Steve replies with a grin. Eddie stops walking for a few seconds and has to jog to catch up.

"Oh, of course, Buckley right?"

Steve nods, still grinning. "See you after class?" he asks when they get to his room.

"Definitely." Eddie kisses him again, a peck this time. Steve watches him leave and marvels at the fact a stupid piece of homework may have just changed his life forever.

[nancypullen]

Monday

Ugh, Monday. I knew it was going to be an exceptionally busy day at work and I was right. Normally I enjoy being right, today...not so much. I got up and got myself ready, choosing comfortable and cool clothing. I fortified myself with caffeine, and headed in to do battle. We're in full blown summer programming at the library and my first task of the day was to teach 25 kids how to build a bee hotel. Most of them did a fabulous job (*cough*the girls*cough*) and left with a home for mason bees that was beautifully decorated and even named. My favorite was The Buzz On Inn.

There were a handful (*cough*theboys*cough) who had no intention of following any sort of directions and built everything from rockets to cowbells. I think their moms made them attend. Still, they were well-behaved and they all left happy. They learned a lot about mason bees whether they wanted to or not. I'm not sure why the library scheduled this program at the end of June when those particular bees are not looking for homes, but we've flooded the bee hotel market with properties and all are welcome. I was able to clean up pretty quickly after the program, and once I'd tucked some things back in their boxes up in the haunted attic, I realized I actually had some...*gasp* unscheduled time. That never happens. I grabbed my book list for July's displays and started pulling from the shelves. Once I had a full cart I slapped up the pitiful decor that I'd made and called it done. In honor of the 4th...

Not my best work, but an appropriate place to display books about Revolutionary War spies, pirates, and women -a little something more than the stuff we learned in history class. George agreed with me.

I designed those silly posters and then printed them at Walgreens. There's almost always a 50% coupon on their website so you can do it for just a couple bucks. Comes in handy if you ever need a poster or a protest sign- I've used it for both.

The second display is awful, so I need to jazz it up a bit. They've taken my bookcase to use for summer reading prize and t-shirt storage, so I'm stuck with this dumb rolling cart.

I think I should add snowflakes or icicles... or just leave it alone because I'm the only one who cares. Actually I'm caring less and less because I PUT IN MY NOTICE. Ohmygosh, I just said it out loud. I have mixed feelings, but it all comes back to the fact that I originally just wanted a volunteer gig, or at most a part-time job. I was not looking for a career or the many, many, many hours of programming, planning, and after-hours work just to keep the place afloat. I really, really didn't want to be a quitter. When people around me were resigning left and right I became more determined to stick it out. But honestly, at this stage of my life my time and my health are precious and this job was sapping both. They've been very kind and have asked what they might be able to change that would make me stay - my kneejerk reaction was, everything. I don't want to leave on a sour note, so I'm just thanking them for the opportunity. I may even propose to them that now that they know my work ethic and I've already been through the background checks and all that - perhaps they'd like me to volunteer now. I could pop in and do the never-ending shelving and even continue the monthly displays. I'd love to do that. Do I expect them to be smart and take advantage of capable and free help? No. I suppose it's time to just put it all in my rearview mirror and appreciate what I've learned. Besides, I just *might* have something even better on the horizon - something that would be on my own time, from my own house, and involve tapping away on this keyboard while my brain spills out ideas. I suppose I've cursed the whole thing by even mentioning it, so I'll stop there and just hope for the best. So that's it. My big news on a Monday is that I won't have to worry about Mondays much longer. This Friday we'll collect the grandgirl for a couple of days, then Matt will fly in on July 1st and we'll all gather to celebrate the 4th. Matt leaves on the 7th (our 40th wedding anniversary!) and Mickey leaves on the 8th for Atlanta to see his mother. She's having a little medical procedure and he's going to be stepping and fetching for her. As of the 8th I'll be home alone, enjoying the silence, and I'll start painting my desk and hutch. Just me, a can of paint, and a true crime podcast...sounds heavenly. I'm finding my groove again. I hope that you're all surviving this awful heat. There's just no reason for it. What good is it? I think the National Weather Service should issue a no brassiere advisory. It's torture. Anywho, things are changing for the better around here, maybe the weather will too. Ever the optimist. Take care of yourselves. Sending out love, take what you need and pass it on. Stay safe, stay well, keep cool. XOXO, Nancy

[sunmontuewrites]

Weekend to-do list... (Fri/Sat/Sun)

I got tired just making this list. Going to take it as quiet and as easy as possible.

Yeah. I know. I'll believe it when I see it too.

(In my defence I have removed a whole lot of baking/cooking things and moved other stuff around and not put pressure on myself my including any writing goals this weekend...)

FRIDAY

Morning routine / Evening routine

Coffee

Moisturise

Staff meeting minutes?

EAB minutes?

Website organised

Draw traditional / draw digital

Enter grades

Breakfast / Lunch / Dinner

Social Club email

Pull report

Clean up data

Pcard coding

Work emails 65 / 60 / 55 / 50 / 45 / 40 / 35 / 30 / 25

Clear out emails in Joint inbox

2025 calendar of events

5 loads of washing

Make thai curry soup

Make cheesecake

Pick up groceries

SATURDAY

Shopping for socks (Kmart)

RB and JH coming for dinner

Morning routine / Evening routine

Coffee

Moisturise

Draw traditional / draw digital

Breakfast / Lunch / Dinner

5 loads of washing

Cut my dad's hair and trim his beard

Buy cat food + brush

Cracker Jacks - brush?

Pick up things from PBTech

Return library book

Supermarket - coconut cream

SUNDAY

Escape room

Dinner out

Grocery shopping list

Morning routine / Evening routine

Coffee

Moisturise

Draw traditional / draw digital

Breakfast / Lunch / Dinner

5 2 loads of washing

WEEKEND TASKS MUST DO

Facial

Clean toilet

Change sheets on bed

Clean CPAP machine

WISH LIST - no one will die or complain (much)

Manicure

Finish Book 7 of Murder Bot diaries

Pedicure

Dust and tidy dining room

Dust and tidy lounge

Write 1k / 2k / 3k / 4k / 5k

Dust and tidy bedroom

Dust bookshelves in hallway

Get kids to wash cat bowls

Get kids to change sheets on their beds

Water orchids

Kids have to do all their washing

Kids - mirrors and basins

Hubs - shower + vacuuming

Kitchen cleaned

End room tidied and dusted

Dye hair

Fold washing

Go for a very gentle walk

Make banana cake

Make savoury muffins for kids lunches

[elibabayblog]

"I don't deserve you"

Post-Winter Soldier Bucky

The sunlight floods your curtains, as your eyes open and quickly shut trying to adjust to the light. You turn away from the curtains towards your boyfriend, Bucky Barnes. Unfortunately, he was nowhere to be seen.

"I wonder where he went, he usually stays in bed with me for a little while?" You ask yourself out-loud.

You get up and slide on your slippers. You grab your robe and leave his room. You start to open his door when you hear Friday.

"Mr. Barnes told me to tell you to stay in his room until he comes to get you,"

"Why does he want me in his room Friday?" You ask.

"Mr. Barnes prefers if I keep it a surprise," she responded.

"Can you ask Bucky come and see me when he gets a chance?" You ask Friday.

"Yes Ms. Y/n."

While you waited you went and jumped into the shower. After you got out you put on some clothes, wanting to do a bit of shopping today.

~Downstairs~

"Ms. Y/n has requested your presence,"

"Of course, Friday, tell her I'll be up shortly," he says putting the last finishing touches on your gifts.

"As you wish Mr. Barnes,"

~Back in his room~

"Mr. Barnes says he will be up shortly," Friday tells you.

"Thank you, Friday,"

He hurries upstairs to his room to find you laying in his bed.

"Yes doll?"

"I would love to know why I am confined to your bedroom," you look up at him.

"Well, now that I'm finished you can see why."

You jump out the bed with a huge smile on your face. You grab his hand and walk downstairs. You see all the gifts lined up for you, including breakfast.

"Oh my god Bucky, what is this?" You ask.

"Presents, just because."

"Just because?"

"Because I love you and I don't deserve you, because you mean the world to me."

"Bucky," you laugh.

You turn around and give him a big hug. You pull away rather quickly and give him a kiss.

"What is all this? When did you get all this? Who paid for all this?" You ask.

"Well, I had been making a list of all the things you looked at, you said you wanted, you wanted to buy but couldn't afford it, and I brought it to Tony. I explained the situation to him, and he helped me, with some exceptions of course." He smiled.

"Buck, you didn't have too,"

"Yes, I did, I want you to know how much you mean to me."

"You didn't have to get gifts Buck; I know how much you love me by the little things you do."

"Like what?"

"Getting up and cooking me breakfast, always opening the door for me, paying for lunch or dinner or whenever we go out, spending time with me when you could be with Steve or anyone else, always giving me your phone, flowers every day, reassuring me you love me, showing me off, being protective. There are so many ways that you show me you love me, every day." You smile.

"I do all that?"

"Everyday."

"Well does that mean you don't need the gifts?"

"Well, I didn't say that I'll gladly take the gifts, but I do hope you have something for yourself, right?" You ask him.

"Well, no, I just bought for you."

"Nope, do you still have his card?"

"Yes?" he says backing up a little from you.

"Go get dressed, you need a day of pampering."

"Princess, I'm okay."

"James Buchanan Barnes, I won't tell you again, go get dressed."

He smiled at you and walked off. God, you loved him, but you didn't want your whole relationship to be about you. You wanted it to be 50-50, so now it was his chance to be spoiled.

"I'm ready."

"Good now let's go,"

"I'm coming," he stopped right next to you.

He pulled you into him, kissing you.

"God, I love you." 

"I love you to Bucky."

"You know you don't have to so this right?"

"I know but I wanted to do a little shipping anyway."

With that you took his hand, Tony's cars and left.

[real-time-twilight]

Breaking Dawn in Real Time

September 8th, 2006 (Friday)

Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous 🌖

🌄 Sunrise: 6:43 AM

🌅 Sunset : 7:46 PM

Breaking Dawn, Pgs. 145-224

Ch. 8 ("Waiting for the Damn Fight to Start")

Ch. 9 ("Sure as Hell Didn't See that One Coming")

Ch. 10 ("Why Didn't I Just Walk Away? Oh Right, cuz I'm an Idiot")

Ch. 11 ("The Two Things at the Very Top of My Things-I-Never-Wanted-to-Do List")

5:30 PM (Approx.) - Jake argues with Paul about Paul hanging around when Rachel (Jacob's sister, Paul's now-fiancé) isn't home, and breaks his nose; Jake retreats to his room and contemplates the rapidly growing number of pack members who have imprinted (an occurrence which is supposedly rare), and his discontent at waiting for the news of Bella's return as a vampire, or her death

6:00 PM (Approx.) - Unable to sleep with Paul laughing in the living room, Jake leaves for a walk

6:05 PM (Approx.) - At the beach, Jake meets Quil babysitting Claire; Jake asks Quil if he ever thinks about dating until Claire grows up; Quil tells Jake he has no interest because Claire is his only concern; Quil returns Jake's question and tells Jake that he should maybe try dating and move on from Bella.

6:15 PM (Approx.) - Jake and Quil hear Sam howling to call a meeting; Jake heads off while Quil takes Claire to Sue Clearwater's House; while Jake is en route, Seth informs the pack that Bella and Edward returned the previous week and that Bella is supposed ill and quarantined at the Cullen House; Jake takes this to mean that Bella has been turned and that the treaty is broken, giving the Pack carte blanche to eliminate the coven

6:18 PM (Approx.) - Jake and Leah arrive to the clearing where the pack has gathered; Sam is reticent to attack, feeling that the Cullen's should not be punished for Bella's decision

6:22 PM (Approx.) - Quil enters the Wolf Chat; Jake and Sam continue to argue; Jake returns to human form, deciding to confront the Cullens himself

6:30 PM (Approx.) - Jake returns to his house to get his bike, but its waylaid by Billy, who asks him to help him into the house; Billy asks Jake about the pack meeting, and tells Jake to leave the Cullens alone

6:35 PM (Approx.) - Jake leaves on his bike

6:50 PM (Approx.) - Jake arrives at the Cullen House and is greeted by a somber Carlisle; Bella asks to see Jake, who immediately realizes that Bella is still human and that something is very wrong with her, as she looks extremely ill; Bella reveals that she is pregnant

6:53 PM (Approx.) - Edward tells Jake to go outside with him, Bella asks them not to fight; Edward and Jake go out and Edward confirms Jake's suspicion--that Bella's pregnancy is killing her and that they cannot abort the pregnancy, even by force, as Bella wants to carry it to term and is being supported by Rosalie, Emmett and Esme.

7:02 PM (Approx.) - Edward proposes that Jake try to convince Bella to terminate Edward's child and, if she wants children, to have them with Jacob instead; Jacob says that Bella will never agree to that, but promises, on Edwards request, to kill Edward if and when Bella dies

7:10 PM (Approx.) - Edward and Jacob return to the house; Edward asks that Jake and Bella be left alone to talk; Rosalie reluctantly leaves Bella's side; Jake tries to convince Bella, who insists that she can survive the pregnancy long enough to give birth, with the intention of being turned as soon as the baby is out

7:14 PM (Approx.) - Jacob switches tacks, reminding Bella of what Edward will do if her plan fails, but Bella remains intransigent; Jacob asks why she is suddenly desperate for a baby, and Bella explains that she doesn't want to carry the pregnancy through because she wants a child, but because she wants to have Edward's child (despite the fact that it bruises her when it kicks)

7:17 PM (Approx.) - Jacob indirectly hints at Edward's suggestion and Bella realizes how desperate Edward is

7:19 PM (Approx.) - Bella asks if Jake will come see her again; Jake says he doesn't want to watch her die, and leaves

7:20 PM (Approx.) - In the woods, Jake transforms into a wolf, greeted by the relieved and furious thoughts of the pack; Sam orders Jake to return at once; the shocked pack are apprised of Bella's condition in Jake's thoughts and rush to meet him about ten miles from the reservation

7:23 PM (Approx.) - The anxious pack conclude that the unknown nature and swift growth of Bella's child poses a threat which must be eliminated, even at the cost of Bella's life; Jacob and Seth object, but Sam uses his authority as Alpha to force them to comply, and begins to formulate a strategy

7:30 PM (Approx.) - Quil and Embry try to engage Jake in planning the attack; Jacob defies Sam, invoking his own unclaimed authority, as the great-grandson of the previous Alpha, and splits off from the pack

7:35 PM (Approx.) - Seth catches up with Jacob, having chosen to follow him instead of Sam; Jake tells him to go back, but Seth refuses, and posits that his decision may not even be reversible, pointing out that neither of their minds are linked to the rest of the pack anymore; Jacob reluctantly allows Seth to stay

7:40 PM (Approx.) - Jacob and Seth arrive at the Cullen House and warn them of Sam's intentions; Seth leaves to run the perimeter of the Cullen's exclusion zone; Emmett calls Carlisle who had gone hunting with Esme; Edward thanks Jacob, who asks after Bella: Edward says that Bella is worse

7:43 PM (Approx.) - An irate Alice (her clairvoyance stymied by the wolves involvement) demands to be brought up to speed; Seth reports no sign of the attack yet; Jacob leaves to patrol with him

7:50 PM (Approx.) - Seth meets Carlisle and Esme and fills them in

7:52 PM (Approx.) - Seth returns to wolf form and suggests that Sam will have abandoned any plans of attacking now, having lost the vital element of surprise; Jacob recalls his conversation wherein he agreed to kill Edward if Bella dies; Seth, very put out with Jacob for this, begins to howl

7:55 PM (Approx.) - Jacob returns to the house; Edward informs Emmett, put on alert by Seth's howls, that it was a false alarm, and that it seems unlikely that Sam will go forward with the attack

8:00 PM (Approx.) - Jacob patrols outside the house and sees Bella in a hospital bed, hooked up to an IV, through the windows; Jake returns to Seth to begin an all-night patrol.

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

Hey everyone ...

I guess, I'm back (more or less).

First of all, thanks for all the messages and the love. ❤️❤️❤️ It's really sweet of all of you to be so concernced about me. ❤️❤️❤️

I am getting better (sooner or later), so I'll try to be back and more active. On top of my list is finishing the new Showman and all the advent calendar fanfics as soon as possible. Please have a tiny bit of more patience. I'm very, very, very and deeply sorry about how this went and I wish, I could have managed to still upload the fics every day. I'll try to post them as soon as possible.

Also, answering all the messages and finally coming around to post all the content and check up on what I missed (on tumblr, with my mutuals, with Ze and Olena, ... - if anyone wants to update me, feel free to send a message ❤️).

And about what happened, for anyone who wants to know (putting under a cut for anyone who doesn't care which is totally fine):

I started to have back problems some weeks ago but I more or less ignored them. I was being very active over the last few weeks, did a lot of sport and increased the difficulty and on top of that was a bit stressed about several things in my life (like the whole eye infection thing but also other things). So I thought my back pain was a mixture of sore muscles and just stress. Since the back pain also disappeared sometimes or was barely noticable, I thought, it's probably nothing.

Oh boy, was I wrong.

Over the last weekend my back started to get worse but since I had a pretty intense training on Friday, I still thought it's just sore muscles. On Monday it got really awful and I started to have a lot of pain all the time, to a point, were I needed stronger and stronger medication and could barely move. On Tuesday my boyfriend dragged me to the doctor but since he was already gone, I got an appointment for Wednesday, believing that would be no problem (I was massively downplaying my pain since I hate, hate, hate doctors thanks to my anxiety - which sucks since I have super nice and awesome doctors but unfortunately my anxiety doesn't care).

Welp, I did not make it until Wednesday. By Tuesday afternoon I was in so much pain that I was basically crying non-stop and could only move with pain. In the end, my boyfriend put me in the car and we drove to the emergency room (anxiety and immense pain is not a great combination, so on top of all that - hello panic attacks; but bless my boyfriend for doing this and getting me help).

In the emergency room they drugged with the heavy stuff to stop the pain and ease my nerves and after hours, I was allowed to leave, with strong painkillers in my bag.

Next day I went to my doctor and ever since he's treating me with strong painkillers and therapy starting next week.

I needed some days to get used to the painkillers and give my body some rest (also because I was emotional and psychially drained - it was hard on my psyche since this was another health issue in a long row I had this year and I had yet again to go to the hospital). I'm not pain free, the pain is just managable. Sitting hurts after a short time, lying on a flat surface is okay, standing is 50:50 of being in pain or not so much.

I still have an MRT coming up next week. Let's see what that says.

I am on my way of recovery and my doctor said it needs up to two weeks before my back starts to get better, so at this point, I'm counting down days and try to numb the pain as much as possible.

No idea who cursed my health this year, but sincerely fuck you and find someone else. I've honestly seen enough doctors, hospitals, machines and medications this year.

[cindylouwho-2]

RECENT ECOMMERCE NEWS (INCLUDING ETSY), March 2024

Since I wrote so many articles on Etsy in the past 2 months, it took longer than usual for me to get the full ecommerce update out. Sorry about the delay, but here it is!

For fresher and more frequent updates, please follow me on Bluesky or on LinkedIn, or become a member of my Patreon.

TOP NEWS & ARTICLES 

Etsy’s fourth quarter 2023 financial results came out February 21; I did a deep dive into all the announcements here. In short, there are a lot of new things coming, and some changes that may have affected some sellers already, including:

plans for more predictable shipping costs for buyers and sellers (what does that mean?)

Etsy Ads are now localized outside of the United States

search will be shifting to boost "high quality" items, going from highlighting what shoppers are most likely to buy to what shoppers are most likely to love

a buyer loyalty program is coming

the goal of “shortening our estimated delivery dates this year by at least 2 days”

This recent post on Bluesky indicates that Etsy is surveying buyers on what they would pay for shipping, which could be related to the “predictable shipping costs” mentioned. A recent Etsy presentation at an investor conference provided a few clarifications on points discussed during the 4th quarter call, and in previous interviews and announcements.

“Our research showed that 10% off is a waste in this market. It's not enough to drive an incremental conversion, so all you did is give up margin. So recently, you've seen us both change the default and talk to sellers about how if you're going to put something on sale in this environment, it needs to be at least 25% off.” [my emphasis] Silverman has previously mentioned that buyers want discounts these days. 

Since the information sellers provide when listing (i.e., titles, tags, descriptions, attributes) “is not always very reliable”, Etsy uses image recognition to classify items as well

They are working on improvement for international fulfillment

Most orders on Etsy aren’t impulse buys; 70% involve 2 or more visits, and 50% involve 4 or more visits

“only one out of every three women in the United States bought something on Etsy last year…. only one out of every 10 men bought something on Etsy last year.”

Etsy’s use of AI in places such as Gift Mode is not in-house. (We already knew they used OpenAI’s GPT-4 for Gift Mode.) 

eBay increased the transaction fee from 30 to 40 cents as of March 15, for all orders over $10. 

An Etsy fee increase of some sort is likely coming soon, as Etsy has surveyed sellers on which options they would most prefer. While I was not picked to take the survey, a few people who did have contacted me with screenshots and details, which I wrote about in some detail. 

Packaging laws are becoming quite onerous for some ecommerce microbusinesses, but fortunately the Etsy forum crew has helped out with a recent summary of which countries in Europe require registration or payment to ship into the jurisdiction. Thanks to Claudia of https://www.etsy.com/no-en/shop/DoceVikaVintage for doing most of the legwork. 

ETSY NEWS 

Etsy is once again changing some sellers’ processing days, adding Saturday or Sunday into the mix when the shop owner only selected Monday to Friday. Some are seeing a notice on their dashboard, while others received an email.

Remember, in the 4th quarter 2023 earnings report, Silverman said “shortening our estimated delivery dates this year by at least 2 days” was a goal, and unilaterally changing your processing times is one step towards that goal. Please check your shipping settings, as this could mean you need to ship earlier than you realize, and Etsy could put you on reserve, remove your Star Seller badge, and deny you Seller Protection when you ship later than Etsy thinks you should.

If that wasn’t bad enough, some sellers are reporting that Etsy has changed the timing of sending the Abandoned Cart discount to almost immediate, and changed the official Help file on the topic to say the coupon was sent just 2 hours after the listing was carted, down from 24 hours. Others say they can no longer deactivate these coupons, and that Etsy Support told them it was a known bug. 

If you want to learn how Etsy's algorithms work and what they favour, the company has added more details on "recommendations" modules we see all over the site to the legal policy page. I've written a short piece highlighting what sellers should pay attention to if they want visibility on Etsy.

Etsy is adding Regulatory Operating Fees to orders in India (0.29%) and Vietnam (1.24%) as of April 1, 2024. On the same day, the Regulatory Operating Fee in Spain will increase to 0.72% (from 0.4%), and the fee for Türkiye goes up to 2.27% (from 1.1%).

The Prohibited Items Policy has been updated in several places, as of March 5 2024. Some of the new sections are covered in this article. As always, the most important parts of these changes will be how Etsy chooses to interpret them, so for the moment I don’t have any further comment, other than to say these types of changes are sometimes driven by law, and sometimes by previous incidents in which Etsy is unhappy with the outcome. 

Looks like businesses in China will soon be able to use Etsy Payments, meaning new shops in China may be able to open for the first time since 2021. (It's not unusual for Etsy to beta test new countries before announcing them officially; it’s hard to say if that is what is happening here or not.)

Etsy's forum restrictions - requiring a signed-in seller account to view most posts - will start on March 26. Only posts in the Announcements and Technical Issues sections will still be visible to everyone. 

There has been some speculation that this is to reduce spamming of Etsy sellers after they post, but the change will also have the bonus of journalists, investors and others not being able to read Etsy sellers' complaints about the platform.

It’s possible to have your product photos featured on the persona page of Etsy's Gift Mode but not have the product available for sale in Gift Mode. I’ve checked several times, and have never seen that seller’s embroidery piece in the featured listings. If you missed my blog post on Gift Mode, check it out here. Note that Etsy seems to have made some changes since I originally released the post. Among other Gift Mode promotions, Etsy employees rang the opening bell at Nasdaq the day after the Super Bowl. Did you know that this year’s Super Bowl was the most watched show in the US since the 1969 moon landing? Etsy hired Drew Barrymore to promote the corporation's new gifting push, which will continue all year. And the company has also released a new “gift teaser” email that buyers can have sent to recipients, which is useful for last-minute shoppers. 

Elliott Management now owns 13% of Etsy shares and options - making it the largest investor -  and now has a board member at the corporation. Known as activist investors, they usually force companies to cut costs ; for example they pressured “Salesforce, in which it has a multibillion-dollar investment, to harsh new policies for engineers and salespeople aimed at reducing headcount.”

Newly-opened Etsy shops will soon be subject to stricter ID requirements, a $15 fee, and longer holds on their early sales; I covered the details we know on LinkedIn. 

If you use the new listing form, you may see a new pricing tool pop up. (It’s not on the old listing form.) Ridiculously, Etsy calls it an “estimated profit calculator”, when really, it’s just an Etsy fee calculator, and not a good one at that. It includes the lowest processing fee possible (some countries have a range of processing fees) and also excludes taxes you may pay on your fees. I don’t know if it includes country-specific fees such as regulatory fees, as Canada does not currently have those.

Etsy has several sales events coming up, including the “spring refresh” which has already started and continues until April 15. 

There are reports of Etsy now advertising its commercials in Canada, which is a first as far as I know. 

Struggling to update your tax information on Etsy? One tip is to use a different link to enter the updates. Another is to use a pdf or png file, not a jpg, when uploading documents, and to combine multiple documents into one. If Etsy is asking your LLP/LLC or corporation to upload ID, I’ve had multiple people report that personal ID should work, even if the wording of the page says it won't. 

If you are frustrated by the recent Etsy test removing the total number of items in a search, I explained here how to determine the exact number of results if there are less than 16,000 listings. Also, you can just try another browser or device because it is a test (I do not have it on desktop). 

Remember when The Smiley Company sued tons of small sellers for trademark infringement, and asked for damages? Some Etsy sellers fought back - and won.

Who is removing Taylor Swift-themed items from Etsy - the artist, or the marketplace?  Swift has sent cease and desist letters to Etsy shops in the past. 

The articles about Etsy being awash with non-handmade and counterfeit goods never end. Here’s one from Australia. Here’s one about Etsy sellers publishing fan fiction that is already free on the web and charging a huge amount. And the media attention to deepfake porn on Etsy also continues. AI use is also subject to media scrutiny. 

TikTok’s push to attract more sellers apparently involves approaching Etsy shop owners. [soft paywall; Modern Retail] 

Josh Silverman has sold off most of his remaining Etsy stock. 

I did a short report on who Etsy laid off in December. 

The scammers advertising a fake Etsy customer support phone number on Google are catching buyers too - why can't this be stopped? "Anyone looking to contact Etsy for customer service issues should be aware that there is no phone number to contact for Etsy support." It’s a big problem that Google seems unable to control, given this study on other fraudulent Google Ads.  

Speaking of scammers, there is a new version of fake copyright takedowns affecting numerous sellers; the person who files the DMCA then offers to remove it for a fee, or even file takedowns against your competitors for a bigger fee. Etsy did fix the first round after 3-4 days, but the perpetrator then filed new DMCAs from a different email address. 

ECOMMERCE NEWS (minus social media)

General

Michael’s Makerplace is beta testing selling third-party items in Michael’s brick and mortar stores. “Michaels says that MakerPlace garnered interest from thousands of sellers during its initial beta period, mainly through word-of-mouth. The company declined to disclose how many sellers are on the platform currently and is now focused on growing customers for those vendors to sell to. Buchanan says the next month will be "critical to make sure [the platform gets] some mass engagement from a buyer perspective."

Some Depop sellers had issues with deposits recently, with the money never being sent to their bank accounts, and instead the deposit was continually rescheduled for the next day. This may or may not be related to similar issues on Etsy. Depop is also immediately scrapping seller fees for the UK (as long as the account sells in GBP), but is adding a 5% fee for buyers in the UK as of April 15. Clearly the site thinks it has more UK demand than UK inventory, and that at least some of those buyers will pay for the ability to buy second-hand. Depop press release. 

Beni is a new “secondhand search engine” that pulls up used apparel from multiple different marketplaces such as eBay, Poshmark, and ThredUp. It offers an app and a Chrome browser extension. 

Temu is subject to a class-action lawsuit claiming that the company’s app is highly intrusive and can read "literally everything on your phone." Also, businesses in the United States can now sell on Temu. 

There are many different platforms and marketplaces to sell digital products such as ebooks, templates and courses; here are 20. 

Amazon

If you sell on Amazon, make sure you have 2-factor authentication set up, as it will be a requirement starting March 28th. Users will need a mobile number or authenticator app. 

Amazon is using generative AI to create new listings for merchants who enter a link of the product on another site. “The goal is to help sellers reduce the time it takes to bring the product from a different website onto Amazon.”

If you don’t use at least 3 images per product page, Amazon will now add in photos from other merchants on the site. 

Amazon had a strong fourth quarter in 2023, beating all estimates.  Amazon Lending has been discontinued, but existing loans do not change until the term ends.

eBay

eBay agreed to a $59 million settlement in the US Department of Justice’s case regarding the selling of tools to make counterfeit drugs. The company must also modify its restricted items policies. 

eBay joined the layoff race on January 23 when it let go 9% of its staff (~1000 people). Those layoffs were spread throughout the company, including plenty of engineers, legal and PR staff, and several recruiters, as well as authentication staff. The company also made upper-management changes. 

eBay’s 4th quarter financial results were up a bit, but active buyers keep dropping. 

Jewellery sellers in the UK faced an across-the-board fee hike as of March 7, adding 2% to the final value fee. This appears to be related to covering the authenticity process, which only applies to certain items above £500. 

Be careful when you confirm your Promoted Listings Standard campaign on eBay - a few sellers report accidentally upgrading to a far more expensive Advanced Cost Per Click campaign.

Walmart

Walmart is offering discounts for new sellers, covering part of fees for up to 90 days. 

If you sell on the Walmart marketplace, beware of the new rules on making authenticity claims.

Payment Processing

Klarna is now offering a monthly subscription to be able to use it at brick and mortar retailers without additional fees. The Verge speculates this may be related to Klarna’s rumoured pending IPO. The company has also employed an AI chatbot to do the work of 700 customer support employees. 

A US study reports that at least 20% of US consumers have used buy now, pay later options at least once. 

PayPal joined the tech layoff trend, getting rid of 9% of staff in January.

Venmo settings are public by default; here’s how to change that. [Washington Post gift link]

Shipping 

Is “free shipping” becoming less common? It appears so. [soft paywall: Business Insider]

Apparently USPS has significant delays in the Atlanta area, leaving packages in limbo for weeks. (Strangely, I had a shipment held up in Atlanta in late January even though the new processing centre did not open until February 24, and that package was finally delivered last week.)

Good basic post on return policies (from a Canadian perspective). Note that half of those surveyed say that return policies affect their purchase decisions.

Canada Post has sold its logistics and IT companies as it struggles to become profitable, and may be looking towards more ecommerce options. 

UPS will be laying off 12,000 employees this year, to save around $1 billion. The company is also starting to deliver to homes on Saturdays in major Canadian cities by March.

That's it for now! I hope to have the full SEO & marketing report out next week.

[joelscurls]

hi jess, i hope you’re having an amazing day!! 6, 28, 34 & 50? 🫶🏻

hi jana; thank you for these! I hope you are too! 🫶🏼

6. do you tend to have "favorite things"? list some if so (foods, colors, shows, etc)

foods: ice cream (black raspberry / peanut butter chocolate specifically), pasta, & broccoli (it’s the superior vegetable okay)

colors: black, dark green, & lilac purple!

shows: tlou & narcos obvi bc Pedro has me in a chokehold, but also new girl, parks & rec, jane the virgin, and sex & the city are some favs that come to mind

28. what's one thing on your bucket list?

honestly just to travel somewhere outside of the US! I have a whole list of places I want to go, some top ones being iceland, australia, and japan, so hopefully I’ll check those off eventually 🤞🏼

34. what do you plan on doing tomorrow/this week?

tomorrow: working & then getting takeout w/ my fiancé, as is our Friday tradition 🫶🏼 we also miiiighhht take a road trip to nyc this weekend so that’ll be fun if we do!

50. list some things you are grateful for

said fiancé mentioned above ^, my cats, Pedro (lol), coffee, fuzzy blankets, all my wonderful moots on here & people who leave nice comments on my writing 💞

[twistedtummies2]

COMMISSIONS 2024

Hello, everyone! It’s time to discuss a topic that I’ve put off longer than I probably should have: Story Commissions for 2024.

Let me start off by saying this flat-out: 2023 was an unmitigated disaster when it came to commissions. My plan to try and take care of crowd control backfired on a most spectacular level. And this was after me trying other experimental tactics to manage time, crowd control, and money alike, none of which really worked. As a result, my INITIAL plan for 2024 was to return to basics: to go back to the way I always did things, and just stick by that.

In some ways, that is exactly what I’m going to do. In others, not so much. So, HERE IS HOW COMMISSIONS WILL BE HANDLED FOR 2024.

I will be opening publicly in February of 2024. There will be commissions in January, BUT, for reasons I won’t go into here, I am contacting the commissioners for January privately. The specific current plan is to open publicly on February 16th, which is a Friday. If I need to open late, for any reason, the late opening will be February 19th; if I am able to open earlier, and I feel up to doing so, the early opening will be February 14th. All other dates for openings will be announced as they come.

I will LIKELY be open nine months out of the year: January (privately), February, April, May, July, August, September, October, and November. I am taking March off specifically because I’m going to be out of state for a week or so that month (unless something changes), and even if that trip gets canceled, I’ll also be having rehearsals for a play, very likely, in the time after I’d be scheduled to return. So by giving myself the extra month off, I’ll be able to ensure I complete commissions despite these hiccups, theoretically speaking. June and December I planned to take off anyway.

THIS IS IMPORTANT: I am - rather begrudgingly, I must confess - going to be raising my prices for commissions. I will also be lessening the number of commissions I take on. Specifically, I will be charging $15 per thousand words, and I will only have five slots available. As far as crowd control goes, I will deal with that on a case by case basis: if reservations for a month fill out, then I may not open publicly that month, but I will not open for multiple months at a time. I will go into why I am doing all this later in the journal, so just bear that in mind for the moment.

There will be special discounts offered in February, April, July, and November. These discounts won’t have any particular THEME, it’s just going to be a collection of characters/franchises that you can earn money off of. With the exception of July, the discounts for the other three months will all be handled the same way: if you request a piece with a character on the list, you will be charged $10 per thousand words instead of $15, basically getting five dollars off every thousand words and being charged what WAS my standard fee.

TIED TO THE PREVIOUS POINT, there will be a standing discount - which means it applies to EVERY month I’m open, not just those four - where if you request a story with one of my OCs as the main focal character, you will, again, be charged $10 per thousand words instead of $15 per thousand.

My extra fee will change slightly too: if I go 3000 words over the established minimum length, then I will start the charging at $5 instead of $10. This fee will still increase by five every thousand. So if the story is, for example, 3000 words to begin with: at $15 per thousand, this would cost $45. If I write 6000 words for that story, then the final price will be $50: forty-five plus a five-dollar extra fee. You can do the math from there.

Now that I’ve detailed all of that…let’s address the question no doubt on a lot of your minds: why have I raised the price and why have I shortened the number of stories? Well…the answer is simply one word: “necessity.” I realized, as a result of the fiasco that was 2023, and the problems with 2022 before it, that my work output has slowed down a LOT over the years, for MANY reasons. I physically cannot write the GIGANTIC stories lots of people commission from me quite as quickly as I used to. So, I’m lessening the number of stories, so that I have a better chance of finishing everything on schedule. However, if I’m going to lessen the number of stories, I then absolutely MUST raise the price: bills need to be paid, various other expenses need to be dealt with. I need to make the same amount per round as before, if not more so, and I need to do it more consistently. SO, I basically have no other recourse. It’s either only do work half the year with lots of stories but only about half the amount of money I’d make, or I do less stories, more frequently, but have to charge more as a consequence. I understand that, for lots of people, these conditions will prove troublesome. I did not blindly stagger into this decision: I consulted several friends and frequent commissioners to see what they thought, and all of them - even if they did admit it might be more difficult for a few of them - agreed this was the best choice to make.

I will be updating my Commission Info Post (and reblogging it) in the near future according to these new plans. Again, January commissions will be dealt with privately, and I plan to open publicly on February 16th. If anything else changes, I will let everybody know.

Thank you all for your patience, and your continued support. I hope this next year will be more fruitful and more fun than the last one. :-)

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Friday, December 8

BUFFY: How did you know my name? ANGEL: I waited. I waited here for you. But you never... I was supposed to help you. BUFFY: (huffs) You were gonna help me. ANGEL: (weakly) The Master rose. He let me live... to punish me. I kept hoping maybe you'd come. My destiny. BUFFY: (huffs) Is this a get-in-my-pants thing? You guys in Sunnydale talk like I'm the Second Coming.

~~The Wish~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Something Blue & Vegas, Too! by all_choseny [and other Buffy/Spike works] (Buffy/Spike, E)

The Shadow Within by all_choseny [and other G works] (Spike, G)

You're My Lighthouse. by Ashmaenas (Buffy/Spike, T)

Connor Adopted AU by greensword101 (Connor, unrated)

The Merry Month of Magnus Presents... What Are You Doing New Year’s Eve? by honeygirl51885 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Puppy Poker by honeygirl51885 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

[Chaptered Fiction]

Buffyverse Flashfiction updated by NotASlayer (unrated)

Plenty of Fish - Ch.16 by all_choseny, ivyscribbles (all_choseny) (Buffy/Spike, G) COMPLETE!

High Tide - Ch. 5 by ClowniestLivEver (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Slay Bells Ringing - Ch. 8 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, PG)

Keep You Ghosted - Ch. 4 by hydranjenna (Buffy/Spike, R)

Goodbye to Everything That I Knew - Ch. 11 by fortes775 (Buffy/Spike, R)

Destiny or Choices Made? - Ch. 33 by charmed4lifekaren (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

The Neighbor's Point of View - Ch. 62 by the_big_bad (Buffy/Spike, PG)

Ship of the Line-Power of the Stars - Ch. 19 by texaswookie (ensemble, multi xover, FR18)

High Tide - Ch. 5 by ClowniestLivEver (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Slay Bells Ringing - Ch. 8 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, PG)

Spuffy's Little Helper - Ch. 8 by Alyot (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

A Very Summers Winter - Ch. 8 by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

What the Drabble? - Ch. 50 by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, R)

[Images, Audio & Video]

Playlist: Buffy The Vampire Slayer S1 soundtrack compiled by Ok-Cranberry-6653

Playlist: Angel S1 soundtrack compiled by Ok-Cranberry-6653

Manip: We Glow by honeygirl51885 (Buffy/Spike, worksafe)

Artwork: buffy hottest ex by sundayroadkill (Faith, worksafe)

Artwork: more sillay angel investigationsssss including bonus smile time... by artsying-ifer (Angel, Fred, Gunn, Cordelia, Puppet Angel, worksafe)

Fanvid: Lilah Morgan | A&W by mercer-queen (Lilah, Wes/Lilah, mostly worksafe)

Gifset: [The Body but it's the nice dinner scene] by bocadelinfierno (Joyce, Giles, Buffy, Dawn, Xander, Anya, Tara, Willow, worksafe)

Gifset: BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER Season 5 Episode 8: "Shadows" by rosamundpkes (Buffy, Dawn, worksafe)

Gifset: ONE CORDY AND ANGEL MOMENT PER EPISODE ➺ 1.22, To Shanshu in L.A. by cangelgifs (Angel/Cordelia, worksafe)

Gifset: Buffy the Vampire Slayer | 6.01 [and] Angel | 3.22 by andremichaux (Tara, Willow, Fred, Gunn, worksafe)

Gifset: [WB promo with SMG, David, and Alyson dancing] by bocadelinfierno (worksafe)

[Recs & In Search Of]

ISO: falloutmelody seeks btvs rp [roleplay]

[Fandom Discussions]

why do I feel like this show wants me to think riley finn is actually a good catch... by caricature-of-a-witch

Deep dive I made a little while ago about this INSANE parallel [Spuffy and tarot card] by raisedbythetv89

POLL: What is your favorite season of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer? by favoriteseasonpolls

Question - Was Faith killed in THE WISH? by NoShip and others

How well do Tara's accusations stand up at the time they're made? updated by NoShip

Random detail I like in the comics: Buffy getting upset that Giles gets a girlfriend by CoffeeMilkLvr

Now for the next letter of Giles quotes “E” [alphabet game] by TransmanDan20

Xander (character writing) appreciation post by ginime_

Why did the Trio even go after the Slayer? by -DoctorSpaceman-

Big days in Dawn's life - does anyone really remember the truth? by microgiant

What to Watch/Read Next [finished only BTVS] by roniwelldone

Anya x Tara is my fave by Tylotron

Video: via redditor JanuaryStorm - Ultimate List Of 100 Buffy The Vampire Slayer Facts by January Media

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

News: via redditor JeSuisLaCockamouse: I can’t believe @dancingwiththestars is over... [IG video about her making the finals of Dancing With the Stars] by alysonhannigan

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

[rockislandadultreads]

Read-Alike Friday: One Puzzling Afternoon by Emily Critchley

One Puzzling Afternoon by Emily Critchley

A mystery she can't remember. A friend she can't forget.

I kept your secret Lucy. I've kept it for more than sixty years . . .

It is 1951, and at number six Sycamore Street fifteen-year-old Edie Green is lonely. Living alone with her eccentric mother - who conducts seances for the local Ludthorpe community - she is desperate for something to shake her from her dull, isolated life.

When the popular, pretty Lucy Theddle befriends Edie, she thinks all her troubles are over. But Lucy has a secret, one Edie is not certain she should keep . . .

Then Lucy goes missing.

2018. Edie is eighty-four and still living in Ludthorpe. When one day she glimpses Lucy Theddle, still looking the same as she did at fifteen, her family write it off as one of her many mix ups. There's a lot Edie gets confused about these days. A lot she finds difficult to remember. But what she does know is this: she must find out what happened to Lucy, all those years ago . . .

Charlotte Illes is Not a Detective by Katie Siegel

The downside of being a famous child detective is that sooner or later, you have to grow up . . .

As a kid, Charlotte Illes’ uncanny sleuthing abilities made her a minor celebrity. But in high school, she hung up her detective’s hat and stashed away the signature blue landline in her “office”—aka garage—convinced that finding her adult purpose would be as easy as tracking down missing pudding cups or locating stolen diamonds.

Now twenty-five, Charlotte has a nagging fear that she hit her peak in middle school. She’s living with her mom, scrolling through job listings, and her love life consists mostly of first dates. When it comes to knowing what to do next, Charlotte hasn’t got a clue.

And then, her old blue phone rings...

Reluctantly, Charlotte is pulled back into the mystery-solving world she knew—just one more time. But that world is a whole lot more complicated for an adult. As a kid, she was able to crack the case and still get her homework done on time. Now she’s dealing with dead bodies, missing persons, and villains who actually see her as a viable threat. And the detective skills she was once so eager to never use again are the only things that can stop a killer ready to make sure her next retirement is permanent.

This is the first volume of the "Not a Detective Mysteries" series.

The Distant Hours by Kate Morton

A long lost letter arrives in the post and Edie Burchill finds herself on a journey to Milderhurst Castle, a great but moldering old house, where the Blythe spinsters live and where her mother was billeted 50 years before as a 13-year-old child during WWII. The elder Blythe sisters are twins and have spent most of their lives looking after the third and youngest sister, Juniper, who hasn’t been the same since her fiancé jilted her in 1941.

Inside the decaying castle, Edie begins to unravel her mother’s past. But there are other secrets hidden in the stones of Milderhurst, and Edie is about to learn more than she expected. The truth of what happened in ‘the distant hours’ of the past has been waiting a long time for someone to find it.

The Sweet Remnants of Summer by Alexander McCall Smith

Isabel Dalhousie accepts an invitation to serve on the advisory committee of the Scottish National Portrait Gallery, but soon finds herself swept up in an all-too-familiar dilemma. David is the grandson of a Scottish clan chief and is supportive of Scottish nationalism. But his fervent beliefs are threatening family harmony, especially because his sister Catriona's socialist views put her at odds with her brother. When their mother, Laura, a fellow committee member, asks Isabel to intervene, she tries to demur. But always one for courteous resolutions to philosophical disagreements, Isabel can't help but intercede.

In the meantime, Jamie, having criticized Isabel for getting involved in the affairs of others, does precisely that himself. Jamie is helping to select a new cellist for his ensemble, but he suspects that the conductor may be focused on something other than his favored candidate's cello skills.

With so many factors complicating matters, Isabel and Jamie will have to muster all their tact and charm to ensure that comity is reached between all these fractious parties.

This is the 14th volume of the "Isabel Dalhousie" series.