#and do basic tasks without feeling like i'm dying

[danaris112]

I am actually so happy my medication is working

[coldwind-shiningstars]

Dungeon Meshi is obviously primarily about food, eating, and crucially survival through eating, but it's also focused on other aspects of survival. Sleep, rest, social ties and social exclusion. There's even extensive commentary on things like personal grooming (Marcille’s hair, Toshiro becoming depressed and no longer shaving), clean bathrooms, and other things. When it comes to disability these things are referred to as instrumental activities of daily life (IADLs), which are more complex things like shopping, housework, and cooking, which people need to do to survive, and activities of daily life (ADLs) which are the basic bare bones needs: eating, toileting, etc. Dungeon Meshi is concerned with the logistics of living and finding joy in those logistics.

This is super related to disability! Yes, Laios is autistic, this has been apparent from the beginning. But what does being autistic mean for him and the story? Mostly, it means his desires, goals, and the ways he goes about achieving them are strange, foreign, or baffling. He has different priorities than other people and the way he expresses those priorities are strange. They affect how he socializes, how he eats…

So, it absolutely makes sense that there would be a minor sideplot about activities of daily living and what it's like to be out of sync with everyone else when it comes to prioritizing things. It's Mithrun Time (he's gonna mith all over the place) and I'm so SO interested in the interplay of disability, caregiving and the logistics thereof, and intersectionality & privilege. Who needs care? How do other people feel about them needing care? How do they receive that care? And who do we think is worthy of receiving care and how does that interact with all these other factors?

Bunch of manga and extras spoilers past the cut:

“So, what's wrong with you?”

I see a lot of people talking about Mithrun's non-eye disability as a depression allegory, which I think is true, but I think it's also metaphorically/symbolically both a traumatic brain injury and a trauma response to sexual assault. The sexual assault aspect is pretty clear if you look at any of the symbolism of the actual disabling event: just look at it.

Mithrun is lying in bed and the goat comes to him, lifts him up and puts its mouth on his abdomen and lower pelvis. The eating is sexually charged, as is the particular way he struggles and protests. It's intensely violating, and things that were once desirable are lost. And the dungeon lord group therapy session involves a lot of people talking about the demons like an abusive lover; Mithrun, even though he wanted to kill the demon so badly, still says that they're gentle.

As for the brain injury, chronic TBIs can cause a wide variety of symptoms. Some immediately relevant ones are anhedonia (lack of enjoyment), executive function issues, poor interoception (trouble understanding what's going on in your body), cognitive impairment affecting ability to reason/multitask/plan/solve problems, changes in behavior and personality, depression, agitation, and restlessness. We see… basically all of these, in Mithrun, as downstream effects of the loss of desires. He can't tell when he's hungry, tired, or out of mana; he can't perform ADLs consistently even if he knows he'll die without doing them and dying without doing them will interfere with his long-term goal, he had drastic personality changes, he oscillates between impatient and totally withdrawn.

Brain injuries can also affect more complex tasks and ability to sustain lengthy periods of complex cognitive work. A common example is losing the ability to read and process longer passages; maybe you can read the words but you can't read a paragraph, or maybe you can read paragraphs but now you get a migraine after 15 minutes. Mithrun's skill loss is not related to reading but the effect is similar – he is and was extremely skilled in a particular area of magic, but also disabled in ways that specifically hinder his skill in this area – to teleport things properly you need depth perception and a sense of direction, and he lacks both of these! And while he's still an incredibly effective fighter it seems like he pretty frequently makes those sorts of mistakes.

This is treated often as a gag and it is genuinely funny but it’s also very real, to no longer be as good at the thing you were good at before you became disabled. Kui takes several throwaway gags seriously later on, not just this one. Another ~gag that's not really elaborated on is the bathroom thing, but I appreciate its inclusion anyway, since even if it's presented humorously it doesn't feel meanspirited in a way a lot of “diaper jokes” do. I think people need to talk a lot more about bathroom issues in a wide variety of disabilities, and I think it's nice that a guy I can already picture the “poor little meow meow” posts about also has this issue, you know?

Preferences vs Desire

Even referencing PTSD and TBIs it's hard to really grasp what having no desires means, and the characters don't generally ask, while Mithrun explains it in vague terms. “Desires” is a very broad term and indeed he has lost access to a wide but related variety of things. Unfortunately this lead to him often being treated as nonagentic.

Mithrun does still have preferences, even if he doesn't express them and has no desire which would drive him to seek out pleasant things and avoid unpleasant ones. He'll comment on the taste and texture of foods, for example – sure seems like he has an opinion!

People treat it like his preferences don't matter since he doesn't usually bring them up unprompted, and he's often in situations where there aren't other options.

Kabru seems best at not doing this (and, noncoincidentally, also seems to be the best at actually caring for him; the Canaries have a lot more Resources theoretically than Kabru And Mithrun Eating Monsters And Kabru's A Bad Cook, but although they are loudly distressed by the two of them disappearing it seems to have positively affected Mithrun's general health)

But, uh, acknowledgement that someone has preferences at all is a really low bar to clear and Kabru also doesn't seem to fully understand how Mithrun's brain works. Mithrun’s caregivers want him to eat when they want him to eat. They want him to rest and drink when they want him to.

He lacks the desire for a number of mundane things but also seems to lack the ability to tell when he needs them. He can't explain why he faints; is “I am out of mana” considered a desire for more mana, one that can be eaten? He can't sleep on his own; it's not only that he lacks “the desire to go to bed” but he can't do anything with his own exhaustion, even if he notices it. He comments on the unpleasant taste and texture of several meals; he may be unable to want to not eat it, but he definitely can tell when he dislikes something. But he also seems to be unable to tell when he's hungry.

Kabru will acknowledge these preferences but there's not really other food options, and Everyone Must Eat. Kabru doesn't know the details of Mithrun's condition yet but you can see the immediate frustration here and the way he offers food to him like Mithrun's a child.

Sure, he won't directly communicate preferences, so that makes it extra hard, but you can always just ask, and if he tells you he tells you.

The pathway between opinion and taking actions about it may be lost in Mithrun but the dungeon forces other people into a similar position – it forces them to eat food they don't want to eat so that they can survive or accomplish other goals. We've seen this with Marcille from the beginning. It's difficult with Mithrun because it seems like there is always going to have to be some sort of someone else overriding his autonomy – yeah, he's not hungry but he still needs to eat or he'll faint. Yeah, he's lying about whether or not he's clean but he still needs to wash or he'll die. Yeah, he needs to take a rest instead of keeping moving or he'll faint. But he's not unique in being in a situation where he has to do nonpreferred things. The difference is more that he lacks the ability to independently do anything when it comes to ADLs, preferred or not, which makes it into someone else’s choice and responsibility.

There's also a theme in Dungeon Meshi that comes up a bit of people being pushy about ADLs but from a slightly different perspective, and they're usually right. You see this in Senshi most commonly; he pushes the residents of the Golden City to actually eat even if they don't need to and can't taste it, and while he's correct in that Yaad does get enjoyment from the food even without taste he's still not quite listening to Yaad. Similarly, Kabru is correct in that he can get Mithrun to sleep without a sleeping spell, but he also ignores the way Mithrun says several times that he doesn't expect massage to work. There's a few aspects to this – wild but expected that the elves would choose the “just knock him out with a spell” route, the “easy way” Senshi always talks about when it comes to magic, instead of actually paying attention to other solutions. But also, generally, people know their bodies best, and sometimes even if you're really sure you have the trick to help them you have to listen to what they tell you.

tvtropes dot org frontslash DisabilityTropes

This is going to be a harder section just because it's so subjective; it's nearly impossible to think about the ways in which disabled people are viewed by the people around them/wider society with any degree of objectivity just because there are so many factors that go into it. But I do think Mithrun is consistently treated as relatively nonagentic and there are several ways this can manifest: being treated as a doll/pet/child, being treated as a weapon, and being a surface for people to project onto.

He's framed or treated as childlike intermittently through the manga; scattered about, just a little vibe in the way he's drawn, like the "say aah" above and Pattadol and Cithis through the teleportation scroll :

That's a middle aged man! And he's framed like a toddler getting picked up or misbehaving.

Which doesn't mean they care about him any less; his squad is really fond of him for someone who's technically like their parole officer. How dare you do this to our captain! They love him dearly; this is obvious and he comments on it! They respect him, too, as the leader and as a strong fighter. But loving someone and thinking they're a skilled fighter doesn't mean you respect their autonomy fully.

There's also an element of everyone projecting their own issues onto him; Kabru with their shared Dungeon Trauma. The canaries all suggesting wacky, midlife-crisis desires. He doesn't ever express that he minds any of this, except when they try to stop him from making particular decisions. They also don't often understand why he'd be motivated to do a particular thing, and in fact some of these projections may actually be correct! But while noodles and pottery may be good later-on goals for him, I think it's striking that a) Kabru was the closest to correctly guessing what desire Mithrun might acquire now and he was still guessing the exact opposite (suggesting a desire to not eat Falin but to help Laios, vs Mithrun's actual desire, which was to eat Falin with no thought given to the promise he made at all) and b) it's a desire that actually makes perfect sense with what we know about him, not something totally new.

And, finally, he's a weapon: people are willing to caretake him because he's good at killing things dead. If his only desire is to kill demons dead, it's easy to start seeing that as who he is. I don't think he'd argue that “trying to kill demons” takes up the majority of his life (it's his only goal and he's obsessed with it) but even if there's only one thing that matters to him he has autonomy (in the sense that he can make his own choices about what to prioritize and formulate his own plans) and personhood.

Politics and privilege – who gets to access care?

One of the things we're first presented with when it comes to Mithrun is that he is intensely capable at handling dungeons. Yeah, there's the immediately visible prosthetic eye and the navigation issues, but the Canaries are built up as being incredibly dangerous and skilled, and he's their captain; they all immediately defer to him. He's intense, he curbstomps an entire room of guards, he's efficient, he's brutal, he's strong physically and magically.

In short: yeah, he's very disabled. He's also still very useful.

At the risk of oversimplification, even within his particular disability, he's much more disabled than Marcille is (she lost something relatively simple and easy to miss, she has no catatonia-moment) but less disabled than Thistle, who seems to still have at least one desire related to the king but is still primarily catatonic. It seems like Thistle is not unusual among ex-dungeon lords, even if there's enough noncatatonic dungeon lords to form a support group later. When Milsiril finds Mithrun, she immediately intends to mercy-kill him – this seems to be a condition the elves are familiar with but consider terminal, at least to the degree Mithrun is affected, and people seem unfamiliar what it means to keep living in this state because Mithrun is unusual in that he survives at all. And he's “allowed” to survive initially because he's not as disabled as he could have been (still has a desire) and that desire is useful. They aim him at the dungeons and off he goes. It takes twenty years for him to recover enough to do it, sure, but they're elves. They can wait. He can still be useful.

Relatedly, when he loses the ability to pursue his desire he's immediately much worse off than he was previously.

The no-desire catatonia is something that can recur and the elves continue to not know how to handle it. If Kabru wasn't there to problemsolve I think he'd have just… stayed there with his increasingly distressed squad.

Speaking of his squad, there's also a fascinating power dynamic going on with just the inherent structure of the Canaries; criminals are assigned as his caregivers. There's the inherent unfairness to the criminal Canaries about them being given extra duties, this strange rich noble guy who's now their Responsibility. There's so much possibility for resentment in normal caregiving relationships, much less being forced by your jailor into caregiving someone. But there's also an element of the power the prisoner Canaries now have over him and his most basic ADLs and needs. Assigning Cithis to his care is such a can of worms! The dynamics of the situation are frankly awful for both of them; of course she resents him initially. It would be strange for her not to. When Pattadol catches her making Mithrun do embarrassing things, she instantly reminds Cithis of her lower-status – she's forced to care for this nobleman and then forcibly reminded that she's beneath him.

She's responding to having menial, low-status tasks forced on her by trying to humiliate him, and although he doesn't have the ability to care enough to stop her it's still a deliberate removal of dignity. He's the instrument with which she is punished and she punishes him in return (until it's not fun anymore and she understands him a bit more.)

Mithrun is a long-lived race, who has structural power over the shorter lived races simply because of how long they live. The dwarves and elves try to actively keep certain knowledge from other races, restricting their access to technology, and other expressions of distance. Senshi spends nearly the whole first season not listening to Chilchuck trying to explain that he's an adult and treating him like a child, and Kabru repeatedly says that the elves do the same thing (and tbh we see them doing it). There's even the fact that it took him twenty years to recover enough to join the Canaries again; a shorter-lived race might have died from old age in this time, or become too old to work in this capacity, and then wasted away without the drive to return to the dungeons. But they're elves; the other elves can afford to wait, and he's not going to age out of dungeoneering any time soon. Being an elf probably contributes to his wealth in the same way skin color contributes to wealth inequality in the real world.

Dungeon Meshi doesn't really go into race in the sense of skin color much, and Kui is writing from a different cultural standpoint than I am. While tallmen are quite accurate when it comes to skin/hair color (yes, even Kabru and his blue eyes; it's rare but possible) and cultural references, the elves, uh, absolutely are not, both in the sense of “dark skin & pale hair and eyes trope” and sense of the royals having jet black skin.

Still, I feel like race is so connected to care and caregiving in the real-world west that I would be profoundly remiss not to mention it. Skin color might not matter to elves in the racism sense, but it matters to humans and humans are the ones writing and analyzing this story. (And I fully expect as the fandom grows with anime-onlies people will like Mithrun more because he's white (has white features) than they would if he had darker skin, because fandom is also baseline racist.)

I don't think we can just not mention that Mithrun is pale-skinned and both Cithis and Kabru, his primary caregivers over the story, both have dark skin.

Racism means white people are more likely to get good medical care, the type you need to get diagnosed and prescribed caregiving. Racism means wealth distribution is uneven, favoring white people. Race affects immigrants taking on undesirable jobs like caregiving for low pay. Racism is a profound stressor which means it contributes to who becomes disabled in the first place in that it can worsen health outcomes.

Similarly to race, gender may not be very obvious when it comes to this subplot within the story but the gendered dynamics of caregiving in the real world are something I do want to touch on. There's an oft-cited statistic about how men are much more likely than women to divorce their partners when their partners are diagnosed with a serious condition; I don't like relying too much on those sorts of statistics because they can be so misleading but it does gesture at something very real, culturally. Even if men aren't supposed to be caretaken, women are supposed to be the caretakers. Certainly, it's not Mithrun's fault that he can't cook and can't do laundry and probably can't do most housework, but I do also think about all the posts passed around about “my boyfriend who won't do housework.”

Again, none of these privileges make him less disabled and less in need of and deserving of care, they're just worth talking about when we talk about caregiving in general.

It's Rotten Work, Even If It's You

People expect disabled people receiving care to be grateful, to accept anything, and to try and make it easier for the caregiver if they're able. Requiring care is an incredibly disadvantaged position, even as actually receiving it can be so tangled up in privilege. Caregiving is tremendously difficult work, it's true, but there's a particular vibe people want from disabled people – all those movies about not wanting to be seen as a burden. Never complaining. Being grateful.

And, uh, well…

Mithrun basically accepts anything his caregivers do, but he's not grateful at all! I appreciate that in a disability portrayal. He'll also lie to and ignore his caregivers, which is Annoying but is definitely an expression of autonomy even if he's probably not doing it specifically to express his autonomy. He's not going to thank you. He's not going to make it easy. He'll accept a lot of things considered “undignified,” and he's not mean or unpleasant in the sense that he's taking advantage or anything, but he's certainly not a model patient.

He's running off back into the dungeons just when you think you've finally gotten him somewhere safe.

There's always a strange tension in caregiving, I've found. It is incredibly intimate but a lot of it is done by total strangers. A number of caregiving tasks are viewed by the wider world as entitled but placing those tasks in the hands of strangers is a remarkably tough place to be in. As a disabled person, I've had to accept my bowel movements being discussed with my parents’ friends, all sorts of being physically moved places not against my will but without my permission, even my pubic hair being shaved off by a stranger (nurse) while I was unable to speak or move. When people are feeding you, making sure you use the toilet, rubbing your feet to make you sleep, helping you with hygiene – people are working so hard to help you. Are you supposed to just accept them doing whatever they want to you?

There's also a dynamic where people will say they don't mind caring for you, they're happy to do it, and then as the years go by and you continue to need care the resentment just builds up. Caregiving is hard work. It's often thankless. The goodness of people’s hearts can run dry, when it's been twenty years and you still can't bathe yourself.

Aaand I need to continue in reblogs, because I'm out of space for images. Please hold. edit: you can find part 2 here

[respectthepetty]

Petty, I have a wild ass Jack and Joker theory, and I need to know what you think because we often end up in the clown car together, lol.

There's been a lot of talk/fears about Joke (and Toi Ting), now that we know character death is on the table - I'm not worried Joke will die (I am terrified they will gut us with Toi Ting but oh I hope not). I'm not saying that Joke isn't about to feel so responsible for what has happened that he's gonna get reckless with his life, because I absolutely think he will.

I think he's absolutely about to do some very stupid shit that could be his life in real danger as penance.

But I've been thinking for a while - since your initial posts about Hope and Save and their names - that Save is going to die. And now that I just skimmed a post that basically said that Joke and Save are the same character in different fonts and Save's guilt in episode 10, I'm absolutely positive.

Save is going to die.

Hope will live, because he has too. Without hope, we have nothing. (I also have a tangential theory that Save will die to save Hope, so...)

Thoughts?

Why not a third secret option? Why can’t everyone live? Since the show killed Jennie’s character, and the man who tried to run away with his few dollar bills died too, let’s just believe everyone remaining will survive! Even more, if Boss survives, then everyone BETTER live because no shitty father should survive when the possibility of a child dying is on the table. So I'm going to aim high because

Fortune Favors the Monkey King

Move over, Kitty! I'm driving this clown car straight to the opera house.

Because this is a Chinese opera.

We already know there is a Chinese influence in this story, as @veemark pointed out about the meal Joke ate with Jack and his grandma.

So with that in mind, in the fourth episode, when Nang punished the men for hurting her people, she drew the "09" stick (but she said nine-zero), which meant the men had to perform the Chinese opera of the Monkey King, which people in the tags thought was sooooo ridiculous!

In that same episode, Jack received his fortune, which was number 9 and stated, "When the fool changes black to white, the fate of the forgiver will change"

Now, skip to episode 9 when Joke gets "The Fool" card and changes the fate of Jack, the person who forgave him, so Jack's fortune was right.

Now, in episode 9, we also get the iconic team name "The Four Little Pigs"

And this is where the light bulb turned on because this is Journey to the West.

Journey to the West is an epic Chinese story that is 100 chapters long about a group of heroes having to complete a certain amount of tasks to achieve enlightenment.

The main character is Tang Sanzang who is basically a saint who wants to bring good to all the land and who everyone is in love with and wants to marry. We are introduced to him in chapter 9 of the story. He is the heart.

The first person he meets on his journey is the Monkey King, aka Sun Wukong, who was so great at being the best trickster that he became overconfident and ended up getting put in heavenly jail for 500 years. The first chapters of the story are actually about him. He is foolish, but he is also the mastermind.

He has a daughter, Yuebei Xing. She has her own story, Journey to the South. She is a badass. She fights monsters and lives to tell the tale.

The Monkey King is easily the most powerful of the bunch, but Tang Sanzang doesn't like the Monkey King's methods because they are immoral, so there is a gold ring involved that keeps him in check.

Or maybe it's this ring.

I think it's the second ring because a goddess, who keeps helping them along the way, helps them with the ring too. She is also cool.

Along the journey, they meet Zhu Wuneng, aka Pig. He is a smart fighter but he is greedy and selfish so he keeps taking shit he isn't supposed to, which constantly gets them in trouble. He is human nature (the world).

There is Sha Wujing aka Sandy, who was once a god, but shattered a crystal and ended up banished to earth to be a mortal. He is conformity without thought (the moon).

And finally, there is Bai Long Ma, who is a horse that they ride for transportation. He is human will (the star).

There is also a princess somewhere in there who must be saved from a marriage.

The group meets obstacles along the way, and lots of crazy shit goes down, but after 14 YEARS they finally come to the end of their journey.

And on their journey to achieve enlightenment they meet a squire whose loved one is kidnapped with the possibility of murder and another squire who is murdered and his wife is pissed about it because she did everything to make sure he wouldn't be harmed.

Now, if you gasped because you think Hope (or Save) will die, well . . . the number 14 fortune was Hope's.

The fortune was given in episode four which is the same episode Jack got his fortune, but it seemed like Hope's fortune played out in the same episode when he found Joke right across the hall staying with Jack.

But the thing is, in the Chinese story, regardless of which squire it is, they don't just need the Monkey King; they need the Monkey King's help.

So the Monkey King goes to the underworld to get the loved one back and succeeds (both times). But he still needs to save our saint!

Remember, the group has to do a certain number of deeds to bring peace to the land, so the group goes in to save their leader, and the ONLY reason they make it out is because all of the people they have helped along the way (especially the people the Monkey King has helped) return the favor and save them.

By saving others, they saved themselves.

So . . . I don't think anyone else is dying. However, it's been YEARS since I read a very condensed version of this story in Asian Rhetorics, and @journeytothewestresearch's blog helped me piece some of what I forgot together.

So I could be wrong, and everyone dies.

But I don't think so.

*fingers crossed that fortune favors the bold Monkey King*

[alipeeps]

A Moment But Forever - Episode 15

He's gone from literally running away from her to seeking her out because she's been gone for a bit and he's worried... 😍

Aaaahhh and he pre-ordered the restaurant to have some roast goose, because he knew she was wanting to eat it?!!

Loving Yuanzhong explaining the concept of a social construct.

Oh man, his explanation that what matters is not the length of life but what you do with it, and being able to do what you want with your life... is especially poignant from a man whose autonomy was basically stripped from him as a teenager. He was made host of a divine weapon (and lbr he was NOT given a choice in that) and then used to fight their war for them... and then immediately after imprisoned. He hasn't been able to "live the life you want" since he was a child.

WTF Xie You?!! (But also, why didn't Yuanzhong do anything to defend himself?)

Damn, payback for something that was an accident? Tanyin herself didn't feel the need to take revenge for what happened at Pinghu, but Xie You feels he needs to do so on her behalf.

Is Xie You dying? Is that what the line means?

Damn. So what you're saying is... you were jealous of your disciple?

Ah she worries if she solves the final question for him, he will have no reason to go on living.

Ah man I kinda love when cdramas do this whole thing where they put such emphasis on what it means for one person to kowtow to another... for the master to kneel for the student, or the parent to kneel to beg the child. It's a uniquely cultural emphasis.

Is that why she's been hesitating and pondering over this final question? Not because she doesn't understand the task... but because she was afraid that she understood the implications of her completing it... and what it would mean to Xie You?

And it's a kowtowing-fest...

Oooh who's singing the song over this scene of her heading back to solve the final problem? It reminds me quite a bit of Farewell Love from Love Between Fairy and Devil... is it Faye singing this?

Oooh what's wrong with Yuanzhong? What was he feeling? Was it something to do with what Xie You hit him with and the fact that Xie You is now gone?

Bro's been sealed for 60 years and his first thought on being awakened is FOOD!! Valid, tbh...

Bit fucking rude to just rock up to somebody's/a stranger's house and just head on inside without being invited, Tanghua. Especially when you know the person you are looking for at that house does not want to see you...

Mmmm Tanghua makes a good point. Apologising in the hopes of forgiveness isn't entirely sincere. Apologising for your past actions without expectation of forgiveness, but because you sincerely regret those actions, despite knowing the past cannot be changed, is more so.

I'm still not sure Yuanzhong particularly cares to hear it though. And tbh chasing after him when he's made it very clear he doesn't want to see you still makes this feel somewhat selfish... like you are apologising not for his benefit but for yours, so that you can feel "better" that you apologised sincerely.

Oh wow, so the two generals who were part of the fake possession plot didn't die after all? Yuanzhong had Zi Fei save them and hide them away! He really is two steps ahead of everybody isn't he?

Oooooooh Yuanzhong is getting closer and closer to finding out the truth about Tanyin...

Would the curse on her only count if she tells that she is a goddess... or would it also kick in if people work it out independently? 😬

Oh wait, as well as the Goddess Wushang, Xie You's other famous student was the Mute Lady of Wu Mountain? Who took a hit for you at the battle of Pinghu? Babygirl, they are one and the same person!!

Could Tanyin be the Mute Lady of Wu Mountain? Hmmm... maybe... 😂

I love the contrast between Tanghua's towering earnestness and Yuanzhong's just... whatever...

DOOOOOOOON'T FUCKING TELL HER YOUR BIRTHDAY TANYIN HOLY SHIT!!!

Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease tell me you used your brain and faked her out with a fake birthdate....

Hahahaa him checking under her nose to see if she's breathing, just in case she's dead again! 😂

Ahhhh but why didn't we get to see him carrying her into the carriage? (And why wasn't he a bit freaked out that she wouldn't wake up?)

I'm love him!! 😂😂

"This fellow disciple of mine is quite impressive!" she says with mad poker face skills.

So according to legend it seems there is Goddess Wushang and the Mute Lady of Wu Mountain - both of whom were students of Xie You. And now we see Yunniang worshipping the Mute Goddess of Wu Mountain? Or is this all just a bit of confusion caused by how the subs are being done? What is the actual characters for Wushang? (Had a quick google and can't find out).

Oh shit is that the War Demon dude? (When it first showed his face I thought for a second it was Tanghua?!)

Whoah, who's the freaky dude scaring the beggar children?

[grantaire-lover-69]

In the golden age of ancient Greece, Enjolras rode his golden chariot in the skies above the mortal land, his radiant beauty and divine powers commanding the reverence of all who beheld him. Yet, it was a young mortal named Grantaire who captivated the sun god's heart.

Grantaire, with his dark curls and eyes that shone like emeralds, was a gifted athlete and artisan. It was while working on a painting that he caught the eye of Enjolras, who was immediately smitten by the young man's grace and skill.

Enjolras, drawn to Grantaire's earthly charm, began to visit him often, teaching him about the art of poetry and music. Grantaire, became enamored with the god's radiant beauty, his heart fluttering with each encounter of his new muse.

Their bond blossomed into a tenderhearted and passionate love, one that defied the boundaries between mortal and immortal. But on the sidelines, Zephyrus seethed with jealousy. He had wanted Grantaire's affection for a long time, yet never acted on his desires. He simply admired Grantaire from afar. Now, he could barely even look at him without seeing the obnoxiously beautiful sun god by his side. He conspired to tear the pair asunder.

One fateful day, as Enjolras taught Grantaire how to throw a discus, Zephyrus made the wind carry the disc off course, striking the young mortal with a fatal blow to the head. Grantaire crumpled to the ground, his life slipping away as Enjolras cradled him in his arms, weeping tears of anguish.

"My beloved Grantaire," Enjolras cried out as he held the dying man in his arms, not caring that his cloth was getting stained red from the man's blood, "Please don't go... Please..."

Grantaire's eyes opened wearily, a pained smile on his lips. The pain in his body felt like it was the worst of tortures from the Furies. He felt himself getting lightheaded as he started to fade in and out of consciousness. He reached out for the sun god's face, his hand touching the soft, sun kissed skin of his divine lover.

As the light faded from Grantaire's eyes, Enjolras let out a gut-wrenching scream, his tears falling upon the dead mortal's face. In that moment, the sun's radiance dimmed, as if the very heavens wept for the tragedy that had unfolded.

That's when Enjolras had found a solution for his sorrowful predicament. He murmured a chant, as he finished, the blood dripping from Grantaire's head that had hit the soil sprouted into a new flora. Enjolras couldn't help but smile sadly at the flower, its beauty nearly matched the one of his beloved.

He didn't want to let go, he felt as if a part of him would die if he did. It took Combeferre's wisdom and Courfeyrac's encouragement to make him go back to Mount Olympus and his golden chariot. But even then, he couldn't help but feel lost. Even with the same flowers adorning his hair, he couldn't help but miss Grantaire.

---------------------------------------------------

I'm sorry if this is bad, my mental health wasn't good while writing this and I had barely any motivation to do basic tasks, much less write. I really wanted to include the mini cult of Hyacinthus(which involves Grantaire coming back to life) but I wasn't motivated enough for it. I really hope you guys enjoyed this, although this really isn't my best work. Maybe one day I'll be able to make it better. I will also try to post this on my AO3 if I have the motivation to get out of bed to get my computer. Thank you again <3

[batnbreakfast]

to your question to goodheroesdeservekidneys about dyscalculia and executive dysfunction: after lockdowns i ended up with a bad case of "hmmm, interesting, it isn't X, Y or Z, but I'm not sure what is going on with you" according to three mental health professionals. Eventually, we trial-and-errored my way into getting better, but during that time, i struggled with executive dysfunction a lot, and one of the most useful things on the topic I saw was an iconographic looking something like this:

so, basically, this approach doesn't treat executive (dys)function as one thing, but as a series of steps, that all have to be made for the Function to happen. In my case, the steps I struggled the most with was task initiation (aka, "what is the first step of making coffee and how do i start?") and prioritising ("do i chop the onion or wash the pot first?") and then other things kinda spiraled from that.

If I use a crude definition of dyscalculia as "looking at a number and having trouble actually comprehending the information the number is denoting", i can easily imagine that the time management/time blindness step being extra challenging for the proper functioning of the executives - especially in an environment with digital clocks. (my personal experience is that i got a watch without numbers for my 10th birthday, so i kinda ... feel time as a piece of a pie chart? like, it's connected a lot in my mind to the angle of the hands of the watch, which makes life easier for me, but might be even harder for someone with a different flavour of neurospiciness).

Anyways, brains are fun in their diversity (uggghhhhhh)! Best of luck with yours.

Thank you so much for taking your time to share this! 😊

The realisation that there can be a dyscalculia/time-blindness/executive dysfunction combination was a bit of a galaxy brain moment yesterday.

A friend of mine struggles with all three, but so far they only looked into time-blindness/executive dysfunction and ADHD, disregarding the dyscalculia as irrelevant. Which it obviously might not be at all.

So - I’m going to share your ask with them and we’ll also do some more research!

Thanks again!

[bluelolblue]

📚 ⇢ what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app? 

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

AAYAYA THANK YOU 💖💙

YAPPING TIME

📚 The last thing I have in my notes is me loving my two oc's. These two are special in some way

Okay, Romano and Luna complete each other. I honestly love this ship so much, and yeah it's canon. Just that I'll make it more meaningful. Romano x Luna is living in my head rent free. Romano needs someone like Luna and Luna needs someone like Romano, they are perfect for each other.

Nothing too exciting, but they mean a lot to me ^ ^

I'll also give what I have last written for a wip fic, why not :>

“What are you doing?” He asked, slightly annoyed with that action. “Just focus on what you're doing, Santi. Everything's okay, I promise,” Gianna said,

❄️ AAHHHH ommgg but there's so many ideas that I have in mind for Santino and John... like not just me writing it, but in general, it would be amazing if it was written by anyone. I was gonna say something with omegaverse, and yk it can be that, too why not but it's not necessary.

Hmm, a long plot of them never having peace. OOOH Santino having arranged marriage to keep the bloodline going (so he would also have to have a kid), even though he doesn't want that, he wants to be with John. Yk, Camorra... D'Antonio's... old-fashioned and have very strict rules. I mean, it can be without this, but it's something I was thinking about. Can't go without Santino having childhood trauma. Just make it even more intense... like it's really bad (why... why can't I just make him happy?) Hmm why not throw in the impossible task and them both nearly dying in the whole process. Basically, one nearly ended up sacrificing themselves for another. Like, it's really intense. Blood, crying... panic attacks >:] oof I got a bit too evil... and I'm not done yet! I had this idea of John cutting off his finger (like that scene in the 3rd movie), but like idk he had to do it for some other reason and it's not in the desert. And Santino managed to find him, sees all that, and wants to help him but ends up getting pushed away for his own safety. So everything kinda becomes too much for Santino and he has a breakdown and ends up destroying his room or idk wherever he is, he just destroys things. And even if Gianna or someone else tries to stop him, he pulls out the "I'll kill everyone and myself" talk. Like... he lost it a little (a lot 💀). So it gets dark... BUT OF COURSE it gets horny, too. We can't forget the horny ^ ^

So that's a big idea for a fic I kinda can say that I dream about. I did say anyone can write it, I'll gladly read more Santino x John fics. BUT @mrssimply I think is already doing such a great job of writing something already traumatizing and hot, like you have a fic that makes you feel it emotionally, that's a win for the writer (remembering how I was a little sobbing puddle with so many compliments and was shaking irl HHSHS). The way she writes Santino and John is really unique, and I think this could definitely work in that way. So, I think this idea would be written amazingly and make you really feel it! ^ ^

Ask game

[not-a-space-alien]

Hello, question for mmss... with how dangerous human-nabbing is, at least in the current era, is there a reason why vampires don't force their humans to mate with eachother? They have other animals iirc so im assuming they do the same for those, is it just a pride thing? Since old vampires used to do it, the new generations have too as well despite it being much more dangerous with new technology n such?

Thanks for answering my weird ass question lol, u can answer in character too if you like!

So in my own worldbuilding, there are a couple reasons why this generally doesn't happen (Not saying it never happens, but it'd probably be pretty rare and a one-off thing)

Most vampires are removed from their food the way humans are removed from slaughterhouses. Human-nabbing is actually not that prevalent outside of 1) people who do it professionally, to feed to the blood harvest web, 2) upper-class vampires that do it as a cultural rite of passage, but absolutely don't need to do it to feed themselves, and 3) absolutely dirt poor broke ass vampires who can't even afford to just buy mass-produced blood. Think of it like humans hunting: People do it for sport if they can afford it and have a culture that values hunting and things associated with it, they do big game hunting to show off that they're rich, or they do it so they have a freezer full of venison because meat is expensive.

Despite how dangerous it may actually be, vampires downplay the risk because of their culture that prizes domination and physical prowess. If you get killed by vampire hunters, the thought isn't "oh that's a tragedy we need to prevent," but rather "wow that person was weak, lol." Think of when people callously go "natural selection at work!" if someone dies from a stupid mistake, but that turned up 10x.

Humans are in this weird space psychologically for vampires where they're not similar enough to vampires to be considered a person, but too person-like to be considered a true animal. So they wouldn't really think of it as "proper" to breed humans that way, even though they would have a hard time verbalizing why.

More practical reasons: It would take so long to raise a human baby up to a size big enough that it would produce a sizeable amount of blood, that it's just way, way easier to go get a fully grown one. Also, I imagine that most humans in captivity who've had their minds wiped from repeated exposure to hypnosis wouldn't be able to actually keep a baby alive, due to their minds being sanded down and only capable of basic rote tasks to keep themselves alive. And you think your average vampire would feed and raise a human baby successfully? Hell no. Very best case scenario you now have a human woman with osteoporosis cuz she didn't get her prenatal vitamins and a toddler dying of rickets and scurvy.

On a meta level, chattel slavery that involves breeding humans like livestock is something it's very, very easy to make a misstep about when you're writing it. I'm not saying nobody should write about it, and what I've written definitely is slavery of some kind, but if I were personally going to write using that as part of the setting, I would want to put some serious thought into how to write it without being offensive. I know this isn't something a lot of whump writers want to or feel the need to think about, but I personally feel a pretty strong sense of responsibility for how I portray things in my writing, even stuff that is intentionally darker. I'm not saying everyone needs to be that way, but that's just how I am.

[disarmd]

hi laura. I just wanted to say that I read green thumb a few months ago and I still think about it all the time. you said something in your year in review(?) about how you're very aware that most readers don't love the plants as much as/the same way you do 💔. but I could feel your love for plants through the whole thing. I felt so privileged to be reading this fanfic that was actually your love letter to a totally unrelated third thing. I might not ever love plants the way that you do, but I got to see what that love looks and feels like through Max and Alex (and Lando). The most touching moments to me were the times when they would gift each other something that would've taken over a year to grow. I want you to have it. I can always grow it again. And something about Alex and his bonsai; the way they engage his strategic mind...

I do have one question tho idk if you've already answered it but did you make max really into plants that look like dicks on purpose? like.... that scene at kew gardens where max is mesmerised by this massive carnivorous phallus is so fucking funny to me

AHAHAHAHHAHAHAH. omg, this is the loveliest ask and I'm like sitting here, like so touched, and then i'm absolutely dying over your question.

yeah! like you said, i definitely know that most people are not into plants the same way i am (and it was very nice/reassuring when so many people commented that they were self-proclaimed black thumbs but still could read the story without knowing anything about plants). and hearing that it felt like a love letter to plants and showed you how it feels to love to grow things is the most special thing in the world, ahhh. literally just reading "i want you to have it. i can always grow it again." has fully made me tear up, like just knowing that you saw that and understood was i was trying to show. there is actually nothing that means more to me that feeling understood, and THIS ASK. i want to find a dragon, complete a series of tasks, somehow avoid the cursed treasure and put myself between the bad humans and her egg, and prove myself worthy, and then, once the dragon has decided we can be friends, put this ask in her pile of treasure to be guarded for all time, <3

AHAHA AND THEN THE DICKS. okay, so this is a very plant nerdy answer, which i would apologize for, but i do feel like you've given me permission to keep geeking out. so, firstly, correct. the pitcher plants (nepenthes) do look like dicks. it's actually so funny - so the way they grow is that first they make a long green leaf, which has like a little stem at the very end of it. then, from that little nubbin, slowly a brown bit forms, and then it becomes elongated, and in the fullness of time, it'll become a pitcher with an open cap. but there's a moment before the lid pops open where the whole thing is like FULLY A DICK. like it just only looks like a dick. the lid is closed and the line of where it's eventually going to open looks like a cockhead.

so like the final product: phallic. the intermediate growing stage? straight up human penis.

obviously i did think it was funny to have max obsessed with the dick plants, but two things:

carnivorous plants are a huge and really varied species. the reason why i had max into them is that, particularly in the incredibly complex terrariums he had, it's a highly technical skill. there's a huge mechanical component to what he did, to create the water features or add the misters, etc. but also, if you get deeply into carniverous plants, they're similar growing experiences to really complex orchids. like i made that post about how to care for common orchids (phals/moth orchids) and explained how easy they are, which is true, but there are tons of other kinds of orchids that are challenging. i mention this just because i assume more people had a mental image of the finicky care requirements of orchids but probably not so many people know what it's like to grow carniverous plants. basically they have highland and lowland ones, which means some need to be warmer, some colder, some need proper winter dormancy, certainly a lot of consideration about humidity. you can get super into breeding them, like creating all these different hybrids. but i imagined max into carnivorous plants because it seemed like the combination of like science and art: very technical, very complex. i find carnivorous plants to be amongst the most beautiful, ever, but in an other worldly way. so the fact that some of them were phallic was a bonus, but not the main reason why i chose that for max's specialty.

as it turns out, there are actually a lot of plants that look like dicks! or boobs! or vulvas! there's this really cute landscaper lady ("this is laura eubanks at designed for serenity with your succulent tip of the day" <- if you guys watch any of her videos you will hear this in your head until the end of time), and she always says that every single garden needs a phallus. she'll always grow one really tall, straight cactus with two little round ball ones at the base. so there are really a lot of plants that look like cheeky body parts, and it's actually really common for gardeners/plant enthusiasts to love that! which is all to say that max is in good company, <3

[lavendertowerarchives]

I believe I may be a sadist, under the right conditions.

(note to all: this post has nothing to do with sexual gratification)

I came to this conclusion a year ago (ish). I only accepted it a couple months ago. I had been in denial about it, saying to myself "oh no, it doesn't count as sadism, it's only sometimes" or "theres nothing sexual about it, so it can't be sadism." The evidence is correctly stated, but incorrectly understood. It's wrongly interpreted in the same vein as "I'm mentally stable because I'm one month clean" or "she doesn't want to be my friend because she hasn't talked to me in weeks." I've accepted it, now that I've stopped caring if it's a Bad Thing or not. I can't change this fact of Being Lavender; it's been there for most of my life, as much as I tried to ignore it.

I believe I'll understand it better if I explain it to someone who understands none of it. These conditions will be narrowed down in chunks.

I don't gain any pleasure from seeing just anyone in distress. If I know nothing about a person, I will feel no pleasure from their pain.

It is different from feeling vindicated. If all I know about a person is that they're a TERF, I will gain pleasure from their pain, but only in a "serves you right" sort of way.

It is different from being antagonistic. If someone (maybe I know them, maybe I don't) is mad, wrathful, shortsightedly rash, or otherwise just angry, I can't help but giggle. I'm serious, I have to keep my mouth shut if someone is mad. I find it hilarious how people can have such a self-destructive and hurtful mindset. It serves no purpose, and the fact that they have such little control over it only makes it funnier. I really wish I knew why it's so funny. I will not help them as a personal bias: I will simply act as though they aren't mad. Whether or not they're mad at me, this usually makes them even more angry. They're still the same person I was talking to five minutes ago. I'll treat them no differently.

I have to know the person\target. If I've never met them, I'd have to know quite a bit about them.

They have to have done something awful to me, to people I like, or people I find innocent. Some people are just mean and I don't like them. If certain people are trying to ban books because they're uneducated, they won't count. If someone's trying to make transitions\abortions\protections illegal, they'd count. If someone's tormented me, they count. If someone repeatedly teases me, they don't count.

Lastly, they have to enjoy life. This one has the least impact and the most significance.

The sadistic tendencies I've seen in myself are... Gory. For people who have become a target of my "sadism," it is important that they want to keep living. My goal, my aspiration, us to convince them otherwise. I want to deprive them of things until they feel some arbitrary level of pain, physical or mental. I want it to feel like death is a preferable "punishment" over living in this state. Maybe they lose their legs and can't walk. Maybe the lose what's between their legs. Maybe they become just blind enough to know that they can still see, but not know what they see. I'd go into much more detail but I don't want to be unnecessarily vulgar.

In a very blunt explanation, I believe that I want to make people "prefer death" because that's how I feel every day. Really, though, I don't know why that's the threshold my brain chooses.

My life isn't "painful." It's decent enough. My intuition is so fucked that it percieves most tasks as worse than death. It blows consequences out of proportion, inflates prerequisites to ridiculous sizes, and basically just tells me "yeah so i did the calculations: between doing your homework and dying, you better start writing your goodbye letters."

The sadism I've seen is unfortunately unsettling. It scares me because it feels like an intrusive thought but with recurrence and reason behind it. Hell, it gets fleshed out in my head without my permission. It scares me because it feels like it gives credibility to my other very unwelcome intrusive musings.

It's also the reason why I'm so quick to write gore into my short stories (check em out if you like broken ribs), I don't even have to thing about "what happens next" because I just describe the scene that played out in my head. How these fictional characters become "targets" is not understood by me.

I'm sadistic, yet I don't intend to claim that label for myself. I don't know any sadists. I don't intend to actually tell anyone.

TL;DR hmu if you want some gore written. Don't worry, it takes a fucking truckload of abuse for me to dislike someone even a little bit.

[frogofalltime]

23.02.2024

today i had no classes at all so i let myself sleep in without an alarm. i had around 10 hours of sleep and when i got up i felt a lot more well rested than i have in a long time.

i brought my notebook, pens, and ipad to the kitchen and got started with studying immediately after eating breakfast. this was a very smart idea because normally executive dysfunction means i procrastinate for hours between tasks, but today i had all the things i needed to do my work straight away.

i watched and took notes on a lecture that i missed last week, it was about jawless vertebrates (lampreys and hagfish) and it was very interesting. i drew lots of weird little creatures.

then i took a break to use the bathroom, pray, and eat lunch. i didn't bother getting changed out of my pyjamas, because i was feeling very sick from The Plague™️, and i wasn't planning on leaving the flat, and i also needed to shower before i could put clean clothes on anyway because i was a Stinky Rat Boy

after that i started working on a coursework project that i should've started months ago but it felt too daunting. it took many hours and i sent a few rants to @etherealspacejelly and @mollusc-consultant but eventually i got it done. there's just one more task i need to do for that project which is a mock interview, i am still putting that off because Autism™️, but the deadline is in just under two weeks so i have time. when i've done that it will hopefully be ready to submit.

i also looked on the university website to find out when all my deadlines are and i put them into my reminders app so i would not forget. this made me feel a lot more organised and on top of things rather than like i was drowning under stress.

then i put away my laundry which had been hanging to dry in my room all week; i didn't realise how much it was stressing me out until it was all put away and i finally had space to move around in my room again. you know what maybe marie kondo is right and an uncluttered home is the most important thing for mental health after all

after prayer time i decided to cook a proper meal for dinner and i called my mother while i did that. she gets worried if i don't talk to her a few times per week. little things did annoy me, like how she said "i always love hearing from my daughter", and when i compared myself to the cat saying i was "so sleepy all the time like meery" (because i keep having to take naps recently) she was like "yes he's a sleepy boy and you're a sleepy girl" :/ but oh well it doesn't matter.

i ate dinner and i was reading percy jackson when my Cool Gay Flatmate walked into the kitchen. she was wearing a really nice outfit which was similar to the kind of clothes i usually wear, and she's dyed her hair green and cut it shorter, and she has a nose ring and other piercings, basically she's exactly the kind of person i want to be friends with, but i Literally Never See Her because she's always staying at her girlfriend's house or visiting family and stuff. i have such a huge platonic crush on her :')

she noticed i was reading percy jackson and got excited about it and we both nerded out about it for a while, which was super fun !! she likes one of my special interests omg !! but she had to go because she was going to be late for something, which was sad because i really want to spend more time with her !! also i was kinda embarrassed because she always bumps into me when i'm like. in my pyjamas and sick and desperately need a shower. but i want her to see me when i'm wearing my daytime clothes and not Dishevelled™️ so she thinks i am cool aaaaa

then i washed my dishes and went to take a shower but it was hard and i procrastinated a lot. afterwards i felt a lot better though. being greasy and stinky is Not fun

i put on clean pyjamas and went back to the kitchen to eat a snack before bed. i have such a huge appetite recently, i can't stop eating, and it's kind of scary, but i am trying really hard to honour my body's needs. i ended up eating twice as much chocolate as i had intended to eat, but i have to remember that it's okay. i'm finally eating what my body wants after more than ten years of neglecting it and i think that's extremely important.

@parasite-2 sent robin a mathematics challenge and robin asked me to help, so i spent two hours puzzling over it which was So Much Fun. i forgot how much i enjoy doing maths questions. its probably also good for my brain, right ? maybe i should do this more often as self care.

then i finally went to bed, i changed my pillow case because i had just washed my hair and that's the Rules. i was feeling very ill again, i couldn't stop coughing and my back hurt a lot, so it took ages for me to get to sleep. i think i finally fell asleep around 2am.

[silver-violet]

Gonna copy and paste some of my lore that has glacius and Sam's first meeting. I recently retyped it and while it's not heavily focused on g/t it is a main subject so enjoy! (also sorry about some of the random references, like I said it's basically just a. Cutout from my lore doc so-)

Story below the cut!

Glacius spent the next few years taking odd jobs and committing petty theft, during which his guardianship was appointed to him (I. don't think I've told you this before but. the way someone becomes a guardian is by the previous one passing, and then inheriting it. No it isn't random and that isn't important until Atreus' part of the story) Due to this, he soon became a mercenary and gained infamy. Eventually, he was scouted by the white knights, joining their ranks. Over the years alone, he had grown cold and distant, harboring resentment for his brother. This attitude helped him advance in the company over the years, leading him to finally live a (relatively) normal and comfortable life. At age 27, some of his more recent jobs began sticking out to him. His targets shifted from arguable evil people, to some who didn't seem deserving of their fate. While this bothered him, he trusted in the company's morals, and continued through. During one of these missions, he was tasked with collecting an artifact that had been raided from the company, and stealing it back from the unground auction it was being held at.

The mission began smoothly, with him managing to slip into the building unnoticed, and sneaking through the unmonitored halls. His target was simply an unmarked door, locking it behind him as he slipped inside. the only light in the room came from under the door, and a dying bulb in a distant corner. It was enough to look over everything though, and he sighed upon seeing the various rows of items. Some were special enough to be set in their sections, while others were simply tossed in piles. Despite the grueling task of searching, Glacius continued on, the minutes ticking by.

Long after the search had started, The artifact still wasn't found. However, one of the items did catch his eye. standing alone from the piles of jewelry and precious relics, was a small birdcage, covered with a tarp. he paused, debating whether it was worth wasting his time on. Curiosity got the better of him, however, as he approached the strange object and pulled aside the covering. Inside was a small creature, frozen in fear as it looked up at him. It took him a few seconds to process how...Human it looked. Its upper half was almost entirely human, minus its thin tail and folded ears. Not to mention the large wings sprouting from its back, and the rodent-like bottom half. After a few seconds of silence between the two, glacius shifted back slightly, crouching to study it better. The creature flinched as he did so, but had nowhere to hide within the barren cage. He felt pity for the creature, however decided to just cover it again. As he was moving to do so, his ears picked up the faintest sound.

"ᵖ⁻ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ. . ." they whispered, their form trembling. Glacius was unsure how to respond, surprised they could speak, let alone in any language he could understand. He thought of what to say for a moment, feeling sympathy for the small thing.

"Hey-" he began, pausing as they flinched from the sound. he lowered his voice to a whisper, crouching lower so as to not loom over them. "hey...it's fine, I'm not one of the ones who put you here." The creature didn't react, and he was beginning to think he had just imagined it as it mumbled again.

". . .ʸ⁻ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ⁿᵒᵗˀ," they said, a glint of hope in their voice. they were still trembling, but seemed less likely to dart away now. ". . .ᵂ⁻ᵂʰʸ ᵃʳᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ʰᵉʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉⁿˀ"

He mulled it over for a second, thinking of how to phrase it without seeming like he was dangerous to them. "They took something, and I was hired to take it back." The creature seemed conflicted with this, but chose to believe him as they took the smallest step forward.

". . .ᶜᵃⁿ. . .ᶜᵃⁿ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗ⁻ᵗᵃᵏᵉ ᵐᵉ ᵗᵒᵒˀ" They didn't quite trust him, but any fate seemed better than where they were now. He wasn't quite sure how to respond, looking away in thought.

"I. . .don't see why not. But you have to be silent," he said, waiting for their response.

They nodded, their shaking beginning to subside. Glacius opened the doors of the cage, holding his hand out as the small figure jumped onto it. Carefully, he held his hand to his shoulder, allowing them to jump on as they clung to his collar. In this position, he was able to hear them better, their whispery voice becoming louder. After closing the door of the cage, he covered it once more, hoping that would delay their discovery. Before he went back to his search, glacius paused, an idea coming to his mind.

". . .Have you seen something that looks like a box made of gears?"

"Was it u-uh. . .Brown?"

"Exactly." Glacius looked down to see them pointing near a pile he had searched through before, nevertheless he went through it again. After even more time rummaging through it, he finally found what he was looking for, carefully stashing it away in his bag. "Thanks. . .uh. . ." he blanked on their name, realizing they had yet to introduce themselves.

"S-Sam. . ."

"Glacius." Before the smaller man could try to continue the conversation, glacius made his way to the door, cracking it slightly as he peered through. Once he was sure it was safe, he made his way back into the hallway, the door clicking closed quietly behind him. Despite the extra passenger, he was able to follow his route back out, soon on the edge of the property. From there, he was able to take his time through the wilderness, though still on edge for anything nearby.

Any questions Sam asked were either met with silence or merely a sound; And any conversation starters were the same, met with single-word replies. It didn't matter, however, as after a quick trek, glacius was able to spot his car and climb inside. He stopped as he went to grab his seatbelt, realizing it would most likely hit the man on his shoulder. He held his hand out to them once more, and they climbed on as he lowered it to his passenger seat. Sam glanced to the side as he was doing so, catching glimpses of various weapons in the back of the man's car. He questioned whether he had made the right choice, but realized it was too late as the car began to move.

The two began to bond as they stuck around each other. Sam had no idea where he had come from and had nothing to go back to. And despite glacius never admitting so, he enjoyed the company the small man provided him, and so they stuck together, unbeknownst to the company.

[true-blue-sonic]

I recall you mentioning a Time God AU involving Silver before that you've been working on? If it's not gonna be trouble, could I ask to learn more about it? 👉👈

Sure thing! ^-^

So, the ideas I have right now aren't a hundred percent solid, so to say. But Silver is a Guardian of Time/some kind of godly-ish spirit or being, who is tasked with protecting the Time Stones. This is the Silver from '06, who got erased from time when Sonic and Elise blew out Solaris' flame: whatever deities are out there in the world of Sonic took pity on him and allowed him a new life as a protector of the time stream. This does mean that he's very far removed from actual living people and kind of has a very big important duty he must do (protect the time stream from shenanigans and protect the Time Stones), but Silver is naturally curious and thus seeks out society all the same. He meets with Espio when Espio is mere seconds away from dying through getting ran over by a car, and he uses his godly powers to intervene and allow Espio to safely get away. However, somehow the Time Stones scatter (I don't have an idea yet why, though. I do really need something, but I just don't know why they would disappear, and considering the whole plot hinges on this it's a bit of an issue😅), which means Silver needs to go look for them with Espio's help. Once Espio has accepted that the time guardian is real and not just a hallucination from the what-was-meant-to-be last moments of his life, he takes Silver with him to the Agency, and from there onwards I'm not sure yet what they can do other than search for the time stones together. And of course fall in love, hehe.

Also you can have the draft of the whole first chapter, since that is basically finished :> I hope you like it! ^-^

~~~~

Espio woke up without knowing his life was meant to end that day.

That was something most people did not know when waking up, he would have reasoned when looking back ages later, but that morning he got out of bed like he always did and went through the motions as usual. “What do we have for upcoming jobs?” he inquired at the kitchen table like every other day as well, and the shrug from Vector was nothing out of the ordinary either.

“One case of a missing person, but that seems more like a runaway little child than anything else. And some sleuthing for a transport company in the harbour, to see if another is reliable. That’s it.”

“Better than usual,” the chameleon smiled, helping Charmy fill up a bowl of cereal while the little bee was chanting something along the lines of marshmallows. “How will we divide the tasks?”

“I’ll take Charmy to find that kid, they’ll hit it off immediately. Harbour for you, then?”

“That works for me,” the chameleon agreed, and breakfast had gone by just the same as it usually did. With no odd feelings or worries at all Espio left the Agency, something akin to a little smile on his face as he briskly stepped his way over to the dock at the ocean. The spring weather warmed the world around him, they finally appeared to have some decent jobs, Eggman was behaving – for however long that would last – and the world was filled with happy chatter and cheerfulness; what did he have to fear?

To such calm future prospectives his thoughts drifted as he investigated the company at the harbour, meeting with their client and helping make sense of legal documents and past descriptions of others who had worked with the same people. “A good day,” he spoke out loud at the end of it, permitting himself a few moments to bask in the light of the setting sun and nodding contently at the orange glow shimmering on the waves of the ocean. With an envelope of money in his possession and a grateful client assuring him they were more than willing to ask the Chaotix for their services again, he could only be happy.

Except something nagging sparked up in his chest, something that made him blink amidst the idyllic scenery.

And as soon as it had appeared, it was gone again.

Strange, Espio noted to himself, scrutinising the whole harbour for any danger and finding none. His ninja senses were honed sharply and his intuition had never failed him before… but there truly did not seem to be something here to cause him trouble. “An omen of things to come?” the chameleon mumbled under his breath, turning around briskly and stepping home even more quickly than he had been on his way this morning. If something were to occur, he wanted to be with his colleagues for it.

The worries the odd nagging had elicited refused to leave his mind, Espio flicking his tail as he mingled inbetween the people making their way home after a long day of work. Curling his lip the chameleon sidestepped around them all, ignoring the busyness as best he could; having so many people around was far too stifling, his eyes flickering around to find a way that did not trap him right into a short burst of rush traffic. Across the street stood a bench, that part of the roads much less crowded…

Nimbly flicking his way around some of the people taking up too much of his personal space Espio came to a halt at the traffic light, ramming his pinkie into the button. Almost immediately his light became green; a perk of being a pedestrian, he smiled to himself as he stepped onto the road while first looking left before his gaze drifted right… and he could not even react to the car that was rushing at him at a speed that would make Sonic jealous.

And then, time froze around him.

Espio stared, yet nothing moved. He blinked, yet the way a frightened man reached out to him on the sidewalk was just as motionless as the scream on another person’s lips.

And someone was behind him on the road, someone who floated above it in a silver-hued light with seven glowing rocks circling its body while looking surprisingly calm compared to the horror of the people on the streets.

“You have to move,” the creature spoke. “The Time Stones can only do so much- it won’t be like this for much longer, and you’ll get hurt. Move.”

“…Oh! Apologies.” And with that Espio finally managed to kick his legs into movement and scamper over onto the sidewalk, and with a blink of an eye his surroundings came alive once more, the chameleon grunting at the gust of wind tugging at his body from the car racing past without stopping or the cries of fright around him.

“Hey- you! Boy! Are you okay?!” The man who had reached out to him raced over, Espio flinching as he was snapped out of his stupor. “That… that driver nearly hit you!”

“…Yes,” the chameleon retorted. “Yes, they… they did.”

Only able to stare bleakly at the road he merely hummed at the man’s fussing, other people beginning to mingle in as well- but he could only stare at where his life surely had almost come to an end.

He could have sworn something shimmering and glowing hovering over it.

“Are you sure you should not go to the hospital-“

 “I am fine,” Espio spoke up unexpectedly calmly, turning around and nodding his head at the man. “Truly. Thank you for your concern, and my apologies for worrying you.”

“Yes, but you-“

“Merely had to take some moments to stop reeling.” Nodding at everyone crowding around him the chameleon took a quick step back, scales prickling at their fussing. “Which I have now, so I must continue on my way. Be careful out there.”

Keeping his movements calm and deliberate Espio kept his face as neutral as possible, the people around him trading nervous glances still- but inwardly he kept his fingers crossed the calm of his words would convince them, and his shoulders sagged just barely as the group eventually let up. “You should be happy with such quick reflexes, they really saved your life. It was as if you’re teleported, you came to the sidewalk so quickly,” the man eventually spoke. “Well, take care out there yourself. I am glad you’re okay.”

“Yes… I am grateful, too. I will.” Though, the question kept burning on his mind… “Pardon, but did you… see someone behind me, when the car nearly struck?” he asked the man more quietly.

“Someone- no, it was just you, luckily.”

“Odd. I could have sworn- well, nevermind. Surely that was simply the stress.” Nodding politely at the confusedly-frowning man Espio quickly turned around in full to make his escape- that had been much, much too close, and that one second of frozen time and odd people telling him odd things had just been an imagination of his mind while he’d long made it to the sidewalk already and was simply reeling from the stress, nothing more.

It couldn’t be anything more.

Right?

A sudden wave of anxiety barrelling into him Espio tensed, gaze drifting over to that one spot where his life nearly ended before he could help it. The road looked just like it usually did on any other spot in the city, grey with white paint drawn over it and the occasional car or cyclist coming past; absolutely nothing that pointed towards the accident that had nearly occurred.

And yet, and yet…

Espio could have sworn something in that particular spot was glimmering still. Not the same glow of silver as the odd person had had around them, but…

Peeking around to see if anyone who had concerned themselves with him was around still Espio set a few more paces until the coast was clear, the streets having gone quiet anew after the small rush of people. The button for the pedestrian’s crossing was pressed quickly enough, its ticking noise changing to indicate he had green light, and a tentative pace onto the grey road followed suit…

And Espio’s eyes widened at the glowing object that laid on the pavement, a rock that had the exact same shape as those that had floated around the creature.

And he was still standing right on the streets.

Reaching down and grasping the rock from the asphalt Espio darted over to the side he came from again, the ticking noise of the traffic light slowing down anew as he leaned as closely against the buildings as he dared. Almost bashfully he studied the rock; it was shaped along the lines of a hexagon with two parallel lines elongated, with a front and six sides moving down. Not a Chaos Emerald, the chameleon decreed immediately, but there still was some sort of power running through it, that his well-trained senses did not miss…

And he had seen them around the creature, he was sure of that.

“Nonsense,” Espio spoke out loud, ignoring the odd looks from some people making their way through the city across the road as he turned on his heels and briskly stepped back towards where the Chaotix’ Agency was. Surely that stone had always been there on the road and he merely had not seen it, or someone had dropped it in the few minutes of his distraction or it had fallen from a car- he had hallucinated the creature and it had been his quick reflexes that had led to a good ending, after all, so there was no way the rock in his hands meant anything.

But as he walked over the pavement and flinched at every single noise of a car driving past the chameleon could not help himself and sent a single glance over his shoulder, where the cyan glow was no more, and he could not help shake the feeling it hadn’t been his reflexes that saved him after all.

[nazmazh]

So, saw a Reddit thread asking about what sort of alternate characters/costumes/looks you'd really, really want for Dead by Daylight, and me, being the nerd I am want so many Remedy-Verse characters (generally would be alternates for Alan unless, like Jesse Faden were to be brought in as a character in her own right, which is pretty unlikely).

And of course, that includes Odin and Tor Anderson. Give Bill Overbeck some company in the Cool Old Geezer category.

And I got to thinking - Those two probably would fucking love being in The Entity's Realm. They'd treat it like some sort of Valhalla - Have fun being able to run basically forever and have a task to work on. And, sure, they can't really do anything to hurt the killers, that wouldn't stop them from trying periodically - Just to see if it might work this time, but if it still doesn't, they'd happily embrace a warrior's death, over and over, protection their teammates and hopefully buying them time to win.

Not "escape" - They know that's not actually truly possible (at least, most likely not). Their True Sight abilities mean that The Entity isn't able to wipe their memories or confuse them about how long they've been there (Or the fact that they really actually don't need to eat or drink in the Realm anyway).

Like I say though - Even knowing all this - They'd probably view the Realm as some sort of afterlife anyway, and there's certainly worse fates than being trapped in The Entity's sadistic games - Really.

Especially knowing that despite however much it might hurt, they're not truly going to die, just respawn, I feel like they'd pretty enthusiastically play the games - Feeling especially satisfied when they do put one over on killers and escape/win the match.

They'd also probably be mouthy towards literally every killer (and a good deal of the survivors too, but those would be more teasing/joking around). Like, the Statler and Waldorf of the Realm.

"Bro, I'm gonna level with you - I think there might be something wrong with your stash. The sickly orange glow is probably a bad sign for most drugs"

"Ooh... Scary clown! Bah! I've opened for clowns scarier than you! You know what's really terrifying? Being stuck in a green room with Gene Simmons when he's trying to give you business advice!"

"Oh no. A teenager with a knife. So original. Oh, you've got a hood and a mask too? Well now, that's really scary. And definitely innovative."

"You know miss, I don't think I've ever seen you actually sell anyone a skull. Do you have any for purchase? No, really, I want to help you with that whole 'Merchant' thing. Otherwise, it's just silly, isn't it?"

"Ma'am, I'm gonna suggest that you should avoid whatever you've been eating. It sucks, I know. I can't eat anything with cinnamon after supper anymore without needing a whole bottle of antacids. Maybe the entity will do you a favour a pull in some of that bismuth stuff from somewhere?"

"Oh, you wanna be all big and scary? I can roar like a madman too! If I had my hammer I'd show you how an Aesir deals with giants and trolls."

"I gotta say, Bro, you oughta get a refund on those shades. They don't seem to do shit for you!" (*Blinds Wesker with a flashlight*)

"Am I supposed to be scared of you? Bro, you're the failed reboot version of yourself! They didn't even find you worthwhile enough to keep making *more* new sequels with! I'm pretty sure I've only ever seen 'real' Michael Myerses and Leatherfaces kicking around. None of that Rob Zombie remake one, or any of the 10,000 attempts at making a new Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie. So, what's your excuse, New Coke? Is The Entity just waiting to give us Freddy Classic as some sort of marketing gimmick?"

[I cannot stress enough that while they'd be saying stuff like this while cleverly dodging out of the way, or pallet stunning and whatnot. They'd absolutely be spouting this stuff while actively dying]

[sen-sational]

I SAW THIS THE OTHER DAY AND THOUGHT THEY FINALLY OFFED SUN- BUT NOOO IT'S HELP WANTED 2 GAMEPLAY. I FEEL LIED TO. WHO MAKES ART LIKE THIS FOR A THUMBNAIL THAT ISN'T RELATED TO SUN ACTUALLY BEING TORN APART?!

I know this sounds wrong, but I'm a little desperate for Sun to be killed. Don't get me wrong- I love Sun. He's one of my favs.

-And because of this I NEED HIM TO BE MAIMED.

THINK OF THE ANGST POTENTIAL!!!

Sun could be BARELY alive when they get to him-- either unable to speak, or only through pained, distorted syllables-- and might end up being a vegetable for a while depending on the damages. This could cause Solar PTSD or something, which sends him into "Work now, feelings later" mode, and stop caring about his own health and safety-

Moon would just LOSE IT. Whoever hurts Sun is basically dead already. If they somehow manage to get away, or his fam stops him from risking his own life to go murder this guy- Moon would be stuck with his own thoughts and fear and grief while he waits to find out if his brother is going to be able to be saved-

And then while they're searching for this guy, Lunar and Earth are left feeling scared and stuck because they want to help Moon and Solar try and repair Sun, but Solar's refusing to do anything but fix Sun- He can't let this happen to another Sun- He can't let it be his fault again-

And it seems that no matter what they say, Moon's not going to feel better until the assailant is dead, or he has confirmation Sun is going to be okay.

So Lunar & Earth don't know how to help, Solar and Moon aren't taking care of themselves, Sun might be dying, Moon's probably tasked Monty and Foxy with helping Solar, or searching for the attacker- Everythings getting bad quickly, and they have at least two extra villains to worry about on top of the one who attacked Sun (It could have been Bloodmoon, Stitchwraith, or Eclipse. I doubt Stitchwraith would go for Sun tho)- AND-

*Glances at fanfic that spawned last night while listening to "Meteor Shower" by Cavetown*

Yeah so if they don't follow through with that threat Bloodmoon made soon, I'm about to do it for them 🤣

Anyway would you be interested in my own take on that scenario if/when I finish it? (It would end up being within an AU, to avoid the "literally-everything-happening-at-once" issue. I want to be able to let these guys just kinda sit in their feelings without Eclipse busting down the door to interrupt it every five seconds)

I an very much interested to hear about this scenario once you finish it ^^

And yes I too am waiting for something to happen to sun but I don't think they'll kill him, maybe have something else happen to him

[seldomscilence16]

Whumptober day 13:

"It comes and goes like the strength in your bones." 

Cold compress | infection | "I Don't Feel So Good."

Fandom: Avengers

Prompts used: All

So while I ignore most of the MCU after certain events we shant name, I saw this quote and was like, yeah I can't not. So it has nothing to do with the later movies, its its own timelined thing (obv) and based more off fanfictions I like to read (fix its) than anything. So, please take things in stride. It's sort and basically a sick fic.    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

….

When the world looks at Tony Stark, they see a spoiled rich boy. 

And it's what Tony wants them to see of course. The Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist. Even Iron Man, the Super Hero he created, has so much speculation because he pilots the armor. Like Tony Stark could never truly be a hero… but he'd been there all his life. No matter how many things he creates to better the world and the people who live in it, he will always be… 

But it's fine. Those who took the time to see past everything, who peeled his layers and stayed long enough to witness what he'd never outright say, they knew who Tony was. And while they were few and far between, Tony knew he was lucky to have any at all. 

So being in a complex, surrounded by stubborn idiots who were not quite in that category yet- or ever with how things were going, but Iron Man could have teammates without having true friends, so long as the world got saved in the end- was quite the task for Tony to handle. And today, that meant a bunch of stubborn idiot heroes who refused to admit they were in fact sick. 

Strange and Loki had assured them- and really it was just Tony, everyone else had been focusing fully on staying upright- that they would find the cure to whatever magical mischief their most recent adversary had cast on them. The two had not been spared so to speak, but they hadn't received the brunt of the attack and were ridiculously stubborn- that's gonna be Tonys word of the day, get over it. So with a fiery look of competition passed between them, Loki and Strange went their separate ways to see who could cure them all first, leaving the rest of them to fend for themselves. 

As anyone could guess, in the ever growing list of assumptions about Stark, there was the assumption he was a needy whiny clingy sick person. Where anyone got that he couldn't tell you, he was tactile and often refused any form of contact from people he didn't fully trust. But as it was, the world saw what they wanted, which included the added fact that surely a spoiled rich boy would know next to nothing on how to care for others when they're sick. 

Which. Rude. 

Tony might not have received the care a child should have, but Jarvis and Ana had tried their best where his parents didn't. And despite popular opinions, Tony did in fact care about people. So with a delirious team, Tony ignored the ache in his chest- when did he ever not?- and readied himself for his hardest task yet. 

He turns, finding them all still staring at where the two magicians had been with squinted eyes, and sighs. 

"JARVIS, lockdown as secretly as possible please. I need these guys contained until this is over." He's glad for his earpiece, talking practically under his breath, to keep the gathered heroes from hearing his order. "And some scans would be great, need to know what i'm working with." 

"Of course, sir." 

"You know Cap, I'm just exhausted, can we do our briefing in the living room?" Tony bats his eyes as if the Soldier can actually comprehend it. 

"Uh," his voice is raspy and he coughs like a dying frog, "sure. Living room…" 

It gets everyone moving, however unsteady it is, Tony brushes from one to another for every sway that's a little too far, keeping everyone on their feet until they can crash onto the nearest soft surface. Or the floor as Bruce so elegantly flops. Shaking his head, he makes his way around, almost too easily removing shoes and draping blankets. He's beginning to think this may be easier than he thought-

Bruce sneezes, tints green and grows several sizes, breaking the table behind him, before sniffing and returning to a slightly paler version of himself. 

"Bless you." Steve mutters, arm thrown over his eyes as his open mouth breathing wheezes in and out of his chest. 

Natasha grumbles, burrowed into Hawkeyes side, face ashen and eyes squeezed closed, she shivers and shifts closer to the archer. Clint, to his credit, does not push her away, despite the sweat clinging to him and red tint to his cheeks. 

Thor is completely out, mouth open wide as he snores around a congested nose. He- like his brother and Strange- was better off, but for a guy who'd never had an Earth sickness- if any, Tony wouldn't know- itd be best to watch him too. If Bruce was breaking things, Thor would too no doubt.

"JARVIS, lower the lighting level a bit, and play something quiet on TV, I'm gonna make some soup." He supposed he should just be glad it wasn't every Avenger, but it was going to be a long day.

He rubs at his chest, joints protesting his movements, and clears his throat to avoid coughing. 

He could do this…

"Steve, I swear to all things, if you do not stop I will have Hulk sit on you."

He shifts the bowl of cool water so he can use a finger to push Cap back down on the couch turned bed. The super soldier goes down with little actual resistance, despite the fact he looks like he very much wants to resist. He's had to force most of them to sit still at least once, Natasha was fine so long as she was against someone warm, Clint wouldn't move if Natasha was resting on him, but had tried to fly when she'd curled into Steve. Bruce's brain still had a million tabs open, but he was also a little worried about the Hulk. The Hulk for his part, was miserable too and just wanted to watch TV one way or another so Tony was less worried about him than Bruce despite the broken table he'd had to clean up. And Thor had also tried to fly, but smacked himself in the face with Mjolnir and promptly fallen into a side table to take another nap… hopefully.

Once he's sure Steve is down for awhile longer, he goes back to his task of pressing cold compresses to heated heads. His hands shake more than usual, but like everything else, he ignores it as he dodges a smack from the red head before pressing the cloth to her neck and tucking the blankets in tighter to appease her. 

Task accomplished, he turns to check on the soup when a whimper- high and sudden- hits his ears. He turns- a little too fast, his head spins with the motion- to find Hawkeye sitting up, one hand on his stomach, the other over his mouth, and wide eyes looking up at Tony.

"I don't feel so good." He utters it a second before he's leaning over the edge of the couch bed and puking whatever the archer had eaten today. 

Tony sidesteps the mess to get to the heaving blond, placing a hand on his back and finding the compress to wipe at his face gently.

"It's okay, breathe. You're okay." Cleaning the cloth in the bowl he helps Clint lay back down, Natasha curling into his side again, and sighs in relief as he relaxes. 

He coughs into his elbow until he can't breathe and he worries about either adding to the mess or falling into it. The comm in his ear beeps steadily, sudden enough to get a breath in, and get the spots to stop dancing in his vision. 

"Thanks Jar." 

"I have re-" "I've found-"

"I really don't care who does it, just fix them." Tony waves at the miserably slumbering heroes as he makes his way towards the elevator. He had far too many things to catch up on to stay around for the aftermath of everything. He rubs at his chest as he leans heavily against the wall, waiting for the doors to open. 

"Tony, are you alright?" Strange's voice sounds far away.

"Fine, there's soup if you guys are hungry." His voice croaks a bit, but he knows if he clears it he'll cough. 

"I believe we should use the spell on you as well." Loki's drawl spins around his ears. 

"S'not the spell. I'll be fine. Just comes and goes," he waves his hand like he can wave the problem away, "like the strength in your bones. Iron bends under heat and stuff… whatever dad said." Hes mumbling by the end, not really caring what comes from his mouth or who hears. "Jar… where's the 'vator?" 

"Running slow sir, my apologies." 

"Tony-" 

"Sir you're-!"

"TONY!"

"....infection in his lungs…"

"...the arc reactor…"

"...pneumonia…"

"...need to flush out the cavity…"

"...irritated and swollen, the arc is…"

"...spell…"

Tony's chest feels heavy, his arms tingle, his head aches and eye twitches, there's a dull pain throbbing throughout his body…

So everythings normal.

But then… why doesn't he remember going to bed, and not his bed in the lab but like a bed bed. 

Shit! The team! 

He sits up quick enough to throw his head for a loop, and to startle the bodies surrounding him. He stares with wide eyes at a room full of heroes, several of which are in web hammocks strung from the ceiling. Dozens of eyes stare back, and he wonders if he missed something he shouldn't have. 

"Are we dead?" 

The collective sigh tells him they aren't, but that there's a lecture in his future.