#and i hate when my techs text me things like this like wtf am i supposed to do

[ilkkawhat]

forget silent hill, the psychological horror of being told there's a mouse at your workplace and it ran to your desk while you're not even there is getting under my skin like nothing else.

[kissmezero]

NO BUT YOU’RE SO RIGHT WHEN HE DOES THAT WHISPER THINGY OKAY MY MIND HAS DECIDED TO CREATE A SCENARIO OKAY OKAY HEAR ME OUT

HE KNOWS YOU GET FLUSTERED WHEN HE DOES THE WHISPER THINGY AND DOES IT ON PURPOSE BECAUSE HE KNOWS YOUR WATCHING HIS STREAM AND HE DOES IT TO MAKE YOU ALL NEEDY…sometimes i really love my mind UM ANYWAYS I SAW YOU HAVE EMOJI ANONS LEMME JUST BECOME ONE REAL QUICK CAN I BE THE 👾 ANON IF IT ISNT TAKEN

[also feel free to write something on that scenario ;)]

WELCOME 👾 ANON, enjoy your stay. but yes I am in love with this idea you’re a genius. this is more of a blurb, but anyway here you go :)

whispers.

(awesamdude x gn!reader)

(cw: suggestive, 18+ only.)

you are a very clingy person, especially towards your boyfriend sam. when you werent with him, you were watching his stream & he knew that.

you hated being away from him for long periods of time, but both of you were busy people, so sometimes all you got from him was a stream & a few texts.

on days like this, sam liked to make things fun for you. his favorite thing was making you flustered, watching as your cheeks tinted red and you became a stuttering mess.

one of his favorite ways to do it was to whisper into his mic. you complimented his voice all the time, and you knew he made sure you could hear every vowel.

it would happen at random times, just so he could take you off guard. he’d lean down and whisper something about his stream into his high quality mic & all you could do was sit and listen.

you could hear just how deep his voice got, how gravely and raw it was. he sounded so close to your ear. you could almost feel his hot breath on your neck, sending chills over your body.

he peered at the camera with a cocky smirk on his face. only a look you could understand, leaving his audience clueless as to what happened.

“wtf.” you texted, hearing his phone ding from the other side of the screen.

he continued to lean down towards his mic, his laugh amplified by the hd quality.

“sorry, forgot to put my phone on silent chat.” he whispered, his lips still inches away from the tech.

you sat fighting in embarrassment and annoyance. his voice sent tingles through you & he knew so. there wasn’t much you could do about the situation other than needly sit still, pushing your thighs together in hopes of relieving some of the tension he’d manage to cause, just from a few whispers.

you’d chew him out later, but for now you could only hopelessly sit in your chair & listen to each time his voice was just close enough to create phantom breaths over your ear.

[youranxiousnerd]

Most Likely To Thoughts

because i am an angry theater kid

spoilers below

First of holy shit. That was one of the best episodes of the season. My second favorite (episode 5 has a special place in my heart okay?)

big red is awesome

i missed ABF this episode hes awesome

miss jenn you literally did the exact same thing 

“would you like to be the first” “im good”

ashlyn youre a cutie

oh my god guys they’re actually rehearsing

FRICKING GO BIG RED

EJ YOU KILLED IT

Gaston was ICONIC. 

the callback to 1x08

“monkies”

im sorry you guys haven’t blocked the 2nd act?!?!?!?! its MARCH the show was cast in January you’ve had TWO months i have been in shows blocked in less time

*angry theater kid screeching*

“It’s an expression, Sebastian”

Seb is going to snap one day. This is like the fourth time this has happened this season. 

Like he lowkey looked pretty sad and angry after that comment. Maybe the episode 10 Seblos fight isn’t going to be so private.

ANYWAYS back to the episode (i will gladly talk about seblos all day)

KOURT AND NINI KOURT AND NINI

they lookin good

kourt and nini have started a “relationships are hard” club and the members include big red, gina, and seb. ricky and ej pop in from time to time

kourtney that is a great lie well done

communication saves lives and obviously ricky and nini never got the memo

ricky no

did you learn nothing from nini and ej?

i do like how he immediately regretted it. like he knows he effed up

oooo ej, gina, carlos, and seb thats intersting

do not try to tell me carlos and seb dont hold hands in class bc they do

#giveusmoreoftheseforupleaseineedagroupchat

AIHFDAKFHGAL GINAS SNORT I LOVE IT

ej honey i think you like her

ngl i might have jumped on the portwell train

GINA LEFT BAHAHA

cash caswell

i hate him already

ej just sinking in his chair

carlos’ somewhat impressed face i cant

cash you son of a gun why

cash this is career day not show off your son day

ej noooo

“seize the day” theatre kids share a knowing glance

im shocked carlos didnt stand up and do the choreo 

miss jenn has a new man every episode omfg

mazzara is my fav

STOP

HOLD THE PHONE

THEY ARE DOING TECH WORK

I REPEAT, TECH WORK

IM A TECHIE IM FREAKING OUT OMFG

those are the nicest high school aprons like where are the ratty tshirts?!?!

how is sebs so messy

bitter seb

i smell tension

ope seb is mad

he is going to snap one day i swear

you can tell carlos regretted it or just doesnt understand what happened

im glad the seblos fight is building instead of something out of the blue

seb has been kinda pushed around this season im happy he is finally saying something

and no more seblos the rest of the episode rip

carlos go after your boyfriend come on

you know what would have been fun? they have their bantar while cleaning brushes and rollers in a clogged sink

ricky have you ever asked how big red is doing?

ASHLYN WITH A DRILL

OMFG GUYS I LOVE DRILLS YESSSSSS

why is there no drill piece in the drill what is she doing? is she bolting stuff or predrilling?

ash trying to be supportive

i love ashlyn guys

omfg two parents this episode what is this?

kourt’s mom being on her side love to see it

“i live to serve”

“i cleaned your desk a little” yep she’ll take you back after that

the shade kourtney is throwing im living for it

ricky just disappears and reappears

oof-okay richard

the pizza place fight. they were both in the wrong, im glad kourt shut them down

REDLYN NOOOO

i love them

ash is trying so hard and red is trying to get her to understand

mazzara you sneaky

i thought it was a date lol

miss jenn take the hint

PORTWELL HOME SCENE

that was really sweet, like go ej and gina, they have one of the healthiest relationships on the show because they learned what not to do.

thats a nice treehouse

lesbians build nice things

i should know

bc im one- ill stop

the treehouse scene-holy shiz. its amazing. props to josh and olivia, i was on the verge of tears. best rini scene of the season, hands down. it was beautiful

nini is sobbing i cant

ricky you can cry its okay

im so happy the breakup happened, major rini shipper in season 1 but they have fallen flat this season. it was handled so well and just gahhh

nini sobbing by herself 

NINA IM CRYING NOW STOPPP

roman sounds so good holy. 

like so good

this does damper my theory on ricky leaving halfway through the show and seb taking over as beast and singing this

MONTAGE TIME

“you’re gorgeous”

mazzara fell hard

“To Miss Jenn” why am i laughing

GABFILFBIWE PORTWELL

OH MY GOD GINA IS ASLEEP 

EJ AND THE HOODIE

GUYS I CANT ANYMORE IM LOSING IT

THE LITTLE SMILE WHEN EJ TURNS THE LIGHTS OFF

REDLYN IS BACK IM SO GLAD

you guys are adorable

howie fell hard

omfg ej

ej noo we love you pls be okay

redlyn you cuties

RICKY NO

IM SOBBING NOW

OMFG LOOK AT HIM

HE HELD IT TOGETHER FOR NINI 

GUYS IM CRYING I CANT

AHHHHHH

we stan big red in this house

ricky and the pillow no

glad ashlyn sticked around

i am dead. ricky thank you thats it.

like that broke me

i should not be crying over this i have already cried to much this season 

you know what would have made this scene better? seb just sitting on his bed then carlos texts him and he pushes his phone aside. something to show them drifting bc its happening and i need content

like where were they the second half?

ITS OVER

WTF

LIKE WHAT THE ACTUALLY HECK YOU CANNOT END IT THERE

WHAT IS HAPPENING 

As you can probably tell, I lost my mind this episode. I have no words, nothing at all. All I have is my tears. The past two episodes have been the best of the season. Episode 8 was another level.

[thistle-and-thorn]

19, 71, 79, 100 <3

19: Top things you like about yourself

Okay first stop forcing me to appreciate my own humanity and its inherent beauty I don’t wanna

1. I think I genuinely try to do my best by everyone. I try to lead with kindness and empathy and compassion. I also try to assume the best in my interactions with people.

2. I think, having said that, I’m honest about other people and about myself. It’s not that peoples faults are unforgivable, I’m just aware of them. It means I’m rarely surprised and I’m ready to forgive because I try to perceive people as whole. It also means I try to present myself as whole without dilution or artifice—deeply imperfect but trying.

3. I really, really like to laugh and I really, really like to make other people laugh. I wouldn’t have thought of this probably but I recently got a note from someone I used to work with that said that my ability to joke around and be silly was something that really relieved staff tensions during a difficult period. It was so moving to hear because humor is almost a moral value for me for that reason: it really helps a person to cope with the worst things. Also if someone can make me laugh, I will love them forever and ever and ever.

71: Top songs this month: okay I’m doing songs New to Me this month because, let’s be real, I’ve been listening to Kings College Choir Carols, James Taylor, Michael Buble, and Winter aid in a cycle of madness like I do every Christmas season:

1. Okay our Advent playlist has come in clutch and to answer a question you asked a month ago: Sufjan Stevens’ O Come O Come Emmanuel is maybe my favorite like wtf it’s so good omg.

2. Also, not to be an absolutely whore on main, but Wherever I Fall from the Cyrano soundtrack is genuinely something I enjoy listening to.

3. I Drink Wine by Adele. New life plan: take voice lessons, get married, then (and this is essential) get DIVORCED, do a cover of this song, profit.

3 Thing I miss about childhood

1. School. I peaked from ages 8-11 in terms of my intelligence, work ethic, and enjoyment of my peers.

2. Having someone make my lunch for me. Love to cook, love to eat, hate packing a lunch.

3. Being less cynical? Jaded? When you’re a kid: everything’s new and exciting.

Top 3 Museums:

1. Isabella Stuart Gardner Museum in Boston is the greatest museum in the world and I will THROW HANDS with whoever suggests otherwise. Like this woman—THIS WOMAN—made her house look like this. And it doesn’t feel cluttered and the design and it’s like this LADY is mixing Flemish fabrics and late 19th century Spanish art and medieval triptychs from GERMANY and it all works and shows the continuities in European art history and also the HEIST like it makes you reflect on the value and impermanence of material things and in this essay I will—

2. Titanic Museum in Belfast. I love this museum. I’ve been twice and it’s just so well done. It’s innovative and tech-y without feeling gimmicky. I learned a lot about an event I thought I understood.

3. Okay, I’m going to say the Farnsworth Museum in Rockland, Maine and I’ll tell you why. They had an exhibit there recently and it was just so small and so simple but so good. I live near a lot of well-known museums—I am spoiled for fancy art—and this small regional museum blew them all out of the water. The pieces were so thoughtfully chosen, the text so clear, and it avoided the urge to overwhelm you with text and images and fancy gimmicks so you could have a kind of pure aesthetic reaction. It was true curatorship.

Thanks babe! ❤️❤️❤️

[argylepiratewd]

2020 (Fanfiction) In Review

Tagged by @vegetarianvampireduck and @branwyn-says

Fics written this year: I, uh...AO3 says I somehow posted 38 fics? 160,990 words. JFC. 34 of those were for Person of Interest, 3 Forever, 2 original work

The ones over 1k words were:

Building Safer Houses - POI, Finch/Reese, 67k. Harold gets stabbed, and John stays with him as he recovers. There’s lots of pining and lots of h/c.

The first fic in the series, Resilience of Birds, is just over 1k, and features the immediate aftermath of the stabbing, where Harold collapses in John’s arms.

in a world that isn’t hers - POI, Finch/Reese/Grace, 26k. Grace gets shot during Beta, and Harold and John whisk her away to a safehouse in the middle of nowhere to heal. I somehow wrote this thing in a week.

Signs of Life - POI, Finch/Reese, 15k. John survives the finale, and lies around in a hospital bed miserably, until Harold shows up. Then he lies around in a hospital bed less miserably. I started this one in 2019 and had a hell of a time getting it to come together properly.

Satisfactory Conclusions, POI, Finch/Reese, 5.9k. A/B/O mpreg. Harold gets pregnant by an OC, and the pregnancy is a bit rocky. John loves him very much. Another fic I started back in 2019 and had trouble with.

Set the World Down, POI, Finch/Reese, 4.7k. Harold overworks himself. John gives him a nice, brain-melting back rub.

the science of touch, POI, Finch/Reese, 3.8k. NSFW. Harold is not used to being touched. John loves touching him. Harold loves John, so it works out.

Abundance, Original Work, Chubby Male Librarian/Male Book-lover Who Turns Out to be a Belly-Lover Too, 3k. NSFW-ish. Fluffy original chubby/belly kink fic.

potential energy, POI, Finch/Reese, 3k. Literal tech wizard Harold is very very sleepy. John knows the best place for him to be is a nice, comfy bed.

Just Hold on Tighter, POI, Finch/Reese, 3k. Five times John and Harold hugged, and one time they did more. We were CHEATED. They should’ve HUGGED.

heart to heart and hand in hand, POI, Finch/Reese, background Root/Shaw, 2.9k. Post-finale Christmas. Everyone is nursing wounds but is alive. Fluff.

Make a Guy Feel Special, POI, Fusco/Reese, 2.5k. John breaks into Lionel’s apartment and cooks dinner for him. (Writing Fusco is always so much fun. He’s so grumpy. It’s great.)

romance of the maybe undeserving, POI, Finch/Reese, 2k. Harold confesses his feelings. John claims he doesn’t feel the same.

A Worthy Buyer, POI/Forever, Finch/Henry, 1.7k. Harold and Henry meet and like each other immediately. Another fic I started in 2019.

A Snow Globe Life, POI, Finch/Reese, 1.5k. Over a year after Samaritan’s fall, Harold and John celebrate Christmas.

like a complicated line of code, POI, Finch/Reese, 1k. John accidentally reveals his attraction to Harold’s belly. I think this might be another I started in 2019.

and if that hacking bird won’t sing, POI, Finch/Reese, 1k. John can’t sleep. Harold hums him a tune. It’s a bit unconventional.

home for the new year, POI, Finch/Reese, 1k. Harold and John ring in a new year together. Last fic of 2020!

The rest are here!

Takeaways from reflecting on your kick-ass writing, or kick-ass lack of writing, during a year more focused on survival than perhaps any other: Biggest takeaway is that I need to take better care of my wrists. Some of that lesson was learned at work, when I had to type up a ton of subscriber information, but some of it was from unwise writing decisions. Breaks are good. I must take more of them as I write.

Another? I really like hurt/comfort. And fluff. I wrote a lot of fluff and h/c and fluffy h/c in 2020. It felt Necessary.

And fanfic is a really great place to escape to when the world is shitty in a bunch of different ways. I already knew that, but it was reemphasized again and again and again throughout the year. The fact that my escape brought some joy to other people who needed it was an excellent bonus. I really love it when my words bring people happiness. It blows my mind, but I love it.

Most surprising fic you wrote this year: Building Safer Houses. I did not expect to write a fic that long, especially during a trash fire of a year. 67k, wtf? It was not supposed to be that long! I had a lot of fun writing it, though, and I’m really happy with how it turned out.

How you’ve grown as a writer this year: I think I’ve started to figure out what it takes for me to write longfic a bit better, and I’m hoping to change that from writing an ungodly amount of words in a short amount of time to writing an ungodly amount of words in a period of time that does not cause wrist pain in the future.

I’ve also made a lot of progress in the being happy with my own writing department. I’m getting better at writing. I can tell I’m getting better at writing. And I’m getting better at enjoying my own writing. There’s still some “I’m not the right writer for that” going on, still some areas I know I need to improve in, but it’s not as bad as it once was.

What’s coming in 2021: I don’t know! More of the same? I’ve been having a blast writing POI fic. I see no reason not to keep it up. Other than that, I don’t know! I’ve got a few WIPs in my files that I’d like to finish, a few ideas I still want to explore, a prompt in my inbox that I still want to fill, a few exchanges I really want to sign up for...

I’d kind of like to experiment with more pairings, but I also really, really love writing Rinch...so many options!

Also, after rewatching Forever, I really want to revisit the WIP I call The Het Mpreg From Hell or The Het Mpreg of Doom at some point in 2021. I got 150k into that thing. It’d be ridiculous if I never finished it. Will this be the year? Even I don’t know.

And I think I need to, at the very least, seriously consider experimenting with writing using speech-to-text. I’m a really private person and hate the idea of writing my stories out loud, but I need to give it some very serious thought. Eventually.

But I have one more exchange deadline on the horizon, and then I am free to do whatever I want for a while.

Not tagging anyone--feel free to do this if you want!

[lysiso]

hi how are u :D any thoughts to share

im doing pretty okay :) and yes a few my brain is always full with stuff OR nothing at all theres no in between so get reaaaaaaddyy :D

I bought moldavite and i have it for two days now ik thats like nothing its only two days right but tbh i dont feel that much and was disappointed but its only two daaays also i really do think my life's on its way to be turnt upside down like i cant explain how i know but i mean it in a good way i feel like the coming few years are going go be so transformational. Why am i (are we) not able to see or meet aliens? i would LOVE to meet a kind nice friendly benevolent alien!!! How did humanity's "intelligence" get so far to the point of it being self destructive? isn't it weird like we came from lil fish in the sea.. to blabla... to blabla.. to homo sapiens... we became so intelligent that we invented all this stuff like technology and all that and yet we NEVER learn from history, ALWAYS repeat the same mistakes and are literally KILLING the earth and other people like isn't that crazy we've become so far... just to be our own destruction thats absolutely bonkers... Why am i so awkward around thid guy from work sure i may have a teeny tiny crush on him but damn get ur shit together right lmao.. WHY is it that when i mention it's been a while since i've smoked weed people offer to go to their place and i can have some but like.. no i want weed either for myself or for me and my friends like why do people suggest that i can come over if i want i barely know u, we are just colleagues why would i wanna get high w u idk u like that... also ur double my age you weird ass man why are u even offering. More importantly why isnt my CRUSH offering... sad... i miss weed, i miss hanging out w friends, i miss being extra w makeup and outfits, i truly hope corona wont be too bad next fall bc i got big ass travel plans (im so excited abt this wtf!!!!) and i really hope i can actually go to the countries i want.... it's literally my dream. Why is banana and chocolate such a good combo? Cote d'or is the BEST chocolate ever oh my GOD it's superior. Brooklyn 99 is so funny and so good. I say i dont have a phone/social media addiction but im literally on it the entire ffin day and it's keeping me from being productive. I hate when people talk abt body positivity but then make fat people feel guilty abt wanting to lose weight or actually losing weight. I want someone to *** ** *** so bad i've been so ***** ******. I should rly start attack on titan it looks really cool, i should finish kakegurui first tho. I really wonder if someone, anyone ever had a crush on me like literally aaaaanyone?? I cant wait to go TRAVEL NEXT YEAAAAAR. Why is my best friend so fucking bad at texting... like tbh some ppl are so ffin dry over text and they always always say "yeah lmao im rly bad at texting" like bitch wym how?????? u got all the emojis and u know popular vine/tiktok memes so???????? use them????? I would love some red wine rn. I love music, but i rly don't get how like.. earbuds work i truly dont like wym the music is transfered through little wires like how like what even is music? is it also made out of 0s and 1s i truly dont get it ALSO what the FUCK is wifi and other wireless tech? like how does that WORK??? i'm like starting to think we got the whole technology thing from aliens. People who don't believe that there's other life out there are so weird.. u cant possibly start to imagine how big this galaxy is let alone th universe and u dont think there's any other life out there?? dumb. omggg i. love. any. potato. dish. yuuuuuum!! I miss Gina in b99. I have quite a few mutuals on here that i've been following for YEARS i wish i could send them all a hug. I simply don't get how you could be okay with being such a shitty person that ur a BILLIONAIRE but u dont give to others.... i wonder why people even WANT to have so much money like... up to a certain extent sure like i do believe money Can make up happy but at a certain point u already have everything u want so literally why not.. save people from dying on the streets like this is so weird. I loveeeeee this tomato-basil bread i once made i cant forget it it tasted like... pizza bread omg yum

[archiefm]

         ... claws my way up from hell once more and vomits onto the dash.... hello. its nora. i used to write rory bergstrom, but if u were here before that u might remember me as greta or alma putnam or..... som1 else.... an endless carousel of trash children..... this is finn, who i actually wrote for an early version of this rp abt 5yrs back now...... grits teeth..... so forgive me if im rusty i havent written him in a long time but seein honey boy gave me a lotta finn muse n im keen to get Back On The Horse yeehaww...

DYLAN O’BRIEN / CIS-MALE — don’t look now, but is that finn o’callaghan i see? the 25 year old criminology and forensic studies student is in their graduate year of study year and he is a rochester alum. i hear they can be judicious, adroit, morose and cynical, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet he will make a name for themselves living off-campus. ( nora. 24. gmt. she/her )

shakes my tin can a humble pinterest, ma’am....

finn has a bio pasted at the bottom (n written in like.... 2015.... gross) but it’s long  so if u don’t wanna read it here’s the sparknotes summary..... anyway this was written years ago n a lot of it seems really cliche and lame now but..... we accept the trash we think we deserve

grumpy, ugly sweater wearing, tech-savvy grandpa

very dry sense of humour and embraces nihilism. 

if ron swanson and april ludgate had a baby it would be finn

he was raised in derry, just south of dublin.

from a big family. elder sister called sinead. he also has a younger sister (aoife), a younger brother (colm), and a collie named lassie because his father lovs cliches (finn hates cliches but loves his dog). 

his father was a pub landlord and his mother worked at the market sellin fruit n veg when they met but got a job as a medical receptionist when she had kids cos it meant she cld be there with them in the day and work nights.

his parents met when they were p young and fiesty and rushed into marriage cos they were catholic n just wanted to have sex. his family were literally dirt-poor, but they had a lot of love i guess

hmmmmm his relationship w his father wasn’t the best cos i can’t write character who have healthy relationships w their parents throws up a peace sign. yh, had a pretty emotionally distant, alcoholic violent father n so gets a lot of his bad habits i.e. drinking as a coping mechanism and poor anger management from him BUT anyway

as a kid he was never very motivated in class, he always had a nervous itch to be off somewhere doing something else. struggled under government austerity bcso there just wasn’t the resources to support low income families where the kids had learning difficulties n needed support. fuck the tories am i right 

his mum suggested he try sports to help w his restless energy but he was never any good at football so he took up boxing and tap dance instead. he took to tap dancing like a fish to fuckin water. as adhd n found this as a really good way to use his excess energy in a creative way

had a few run ins with the police in his early teens for spray painting and graffiti, but he straightened himself out n now actually considering becoming a detective inspector??? cops are pigs.

he had a youtube channel where he posted videos of him tapdancing and breakdancing as a kid, basically would be a tiktok boy nowadays, n had like... a small fanbase in his early teens. attended several open auditions unsuccessfully, until he was finally cast in billy eliot when he was fifteen.

during billy eliot he began dating an italian dancer called nina. they became dance partners soon after and toured across the republic with various different shows (inc riverdance lol the classic irish stereotype). their relationship was p toxic tbh, they were both very hot tempered people and just used to argue and fight all the time.

he went semi-pro at tap dancing, and nina couldn’t stand being second best so she moved back to italy with her family. ignored his texts, phone calls, etc, eventually he was driven to the point where he used his savings to buy a plane ticket, showed up at her house and she was like wtf?? freaked out and filed a restraining order accusing him of stalking.

he was fined for harassment and then returned home to derry, but after the incident with nina he quit dancing for good and finished his leaving cert before heading to university in the US to get as far away from nina and his past life as poss. and basically since he quit dancing to study forensics (death kink. finn cant get enough of that morgue. just walks around sayin beat u) he’s become a massive grump and jsut doesn’t see the good in people any more.

u’ll find finn in an old man bar drinking whiskey bc he is in fact an old man at heart or sat on his roof smoking a joint, drawing wolves and lions and skeletons and shit, playing call of duty or getting blazed or at the corner of the room in a house party ignoring everyone and scrolling through twitter. is a massive e-boy. always up-to-date on memes and internet slang. has reddit as an app on his phone

not very good at communication. rather than solve his issues by talking, he’d prefer to just solve them through fighting or running away from his problems hence why he has come halfway across the world to get away from an issue which probs cld have been solved w a few apology emails.

takes a lot to phase him, but when his beserk button gets pressed he can become a bit pugnacious like an angry lil rottweiler. in his undergrad he was in a few fist fights but doesn’t really do tht any more as he doesn’t condone violence.

 in the previous version of this rp he was hospitalised like 5 times. pls, give my son a break. stop tryin to kill him. he literaly got a bottle smashed over his head and bled out all over his favourite angora rug that was the only light of his life

works at the campus coffee shop n always whines about how he’s a slave to capitalism. always smells of coffee

lives off campus with an elderly woman named Marianne, and basically gets reduced rent bcos he makes her dinner / keeps her company. they have a great bond

fan of karl marx. v big on socialism

insomniac with chronic nosebleeds

cynical about everything. too much of a fight club character 4 his own good n has his head up tyler durden’s sphincter

always confused or annoyed

statistics

basic information

full name: finnegan seamus o'callaghan nickname(s): finn age: 25 astrological sign: aries hometown: derry, ireland occupation: phd student / former street entertainer fatal flaw: cynicism positives: self-reliant, street smart, relaxed, intelligent, spontaneous, brave, independent, reliable, trustworthy, loyal. negatives: hostile, impulsive, stubborn, brooding, pugnacious, untrusting, cynical, enigmatic, reserved.

physical

colouring: medium hair colour: dark brown, almost black eye colour: brown height: 5’9” weight: 69kg build: tall, athletic voice: subtle irish accent, low, smooth. dominant hand: left scar(s): one on the left side of his ribs from a knife wound that he doesn’t remember getting cos he was drunk distinguishing marks: freckles, tattoo of a wolf howling at a moon allergies: pollen and the full spectrum of human emotion alcohol tolerance: high drunken behaviour: he becomes friendlier, far more conversational than when sober, flirtier, and generally more self-confident.

psychological

dreams/goals: self-fulfilment, travel the globe, experience life in its most alive and technicoloured version, make documentary films, help the vulnerable in society, grow as a human being.

skills: jack-of-all-trades, very fast runner, good at thieving things, talented tap dancer, good in crisis situations, dab-hand at mechanics, musically-intelligent, can throw a mean right hook and very capable of defending himself, can roll a cigarette, memorises quotes and passages of literature with ease, can light a match with his teeth.

likes: the smell of the earth after rain, poetry, cigarettes, shakespeare, whiskey, tattoos, travelling, ac/dc, deep conversations, leather jackets, open spaces, the smell of petrol, early noughties ‘emo phase’ anthems.

dislikes:  the government, parties, rules, donald trump, children, apple products, weddings, people in general, small talk, dependency, loneliness, pop music, public transport, justin timberlake, uncertainty.fears: fear itself, drowning alignment: true neutral mbti: istp – “while their mechanical tendencies can make them appear simple at a glance, istps are actually quite enigmatic. friendly but very private, calm but suddenly spontaneous, extremely curious but unable to stay focused on formal studies, istp personalities can be a challenge to predict, even by their friends and loved ones. istps can seem very loyal and steady for a while, but they tend to build up a store of impulsive energy that explodes without warning, taking their interests in bold new directions.” (via 16personalities.com)

full bio (lame as fuck written years ago..... pleathe...)

tw homophobia

born in quigley’s pub on the backstreets of sunny dublin, young finnegan o'callaghan was thrown kicking and screaming into the rowdy suburbs of irish drinking culture. the son of a landlord and a fishwife, he never had much in the way of earnings, but there was never a dull moment in his lively estate, where asbo’s thrived, but community spirit conquered. at school, finn was pegged as lazy and unmotivated, though truly his dyslexia made it hard for the boy to learn in the same environment of his peers and only made him more closed-off in class. struggling with anger management, finn moved from school to school, unable to fit the cookie-cutter mould that school enforced on him, though whilst academic studies were of little interest to the boy, he soon found his true passions lay in recreational activities. immersed into the joys of sport from as young as four, finn was an ardent munster fan and anticipated nothing more than the day he could finally fit into his brother’s old pair of rugby boots.

his calling finally came unexpectedly, not in the form of rugger, but through dance. to learn to express himself in a non-academic way, he began tap dancing, finding therapy in the beat of his soles against the cracked kitchen tiles (much to his mother’s disgrace). it wasn’t a conscious choice, finn just realised one day that dance was something that made him feel. a king of the streets, finn made his fortune on those cobbled pavements – dancing and drawing to earn his keep. by default, finn became a street artist, each penny he earned from his chalk drawings saved in a jam jar towards buying his first pair of tap shoes. though many of his less-than-amiable neighbours called him a nancy and a gaybo, finn refused to quit at his somewhat ‘unconventional’ hobby, for the young scrapper found energy, life, and released anger through the rhythm of tap. soon he branched out into street dance, hip hop, break dancing, lyrical, his days spent smacking his scuffed feet against the broken patio into the night.

when he was thirteen he took up boxing, and as expected, his newfound ‘macho’ pastime conflicted with his dancing. the boxers called him ‘soft’; the dancers called him ‘inelegant’. he felt like two different people; having to choose between interests was like being handed a knife and asked to which half of himself he wished to cut away. he couldn’t afford professional training in dance, with most schools based in england and limited scholarships available. instead, he made the street his studio, racking up a small fanbase on youtube. when he was fifteen he made his debut in billy eliot at the olympia theatre in dublin. enter nina de souza, talented, beautiful and italian; ballet dancer, operatic singer, genius whiz kid, and spoiled brat. she was selfish, conceited, hell bent on getting her own way, and every director’s nightmare. finn fell for her like a house of cards. he’d always had a soft spot for girls who meant trouble. and so their hellish courtship began.

by the time they were seventeen, the two young swans had danced in every playhouse across the republic. they were known in theatres across the country for their tempestuous personalities, their raging arguments with one another, their tendency to drop out of shows altogether without any notice, yet the money kept rolling in and the audiences continued to grow. for three years, their families continued to put up with their hysterical fights followed by passionate reconciliations. he was too possessive, and she was too wild. their carcrash of a relationship finally came to a catastrophic halt when nina broke off the whole affair and returned to italy with her family. for months finn tried to contact her, yet his phone calls, texts, facebook messages were always ignored, until finally he was driven to drastic measures and used his savings to get a plane to her home town. when finn turned up uninvited at nina’s house she freaked out – and rightly so – she contacted her agent, accused him of stalking her, and had a restraining order placed against him. finn was arrested, held in a station overnight, and charged with harassment before he was allowed to return to dublin.

after the incident with nina, finn lost the fight in his eyes. he became far more hostile, far less likely to retaliate with his own fists, and picked fights not for the thrill of feeling his own fists pummel another into a wall, but for the sensation of his own brittle bones cracking. he dropped his tap shoes in a dumpster, stopped talking to his friends, followed his father’s advice and went back to school to complete his leaving certificate. a few short months later, and finn was packing his bags, saying his bittersweet goodbyes, and travelling half-way across the globe to be as far away as possible from his past self, his mess of a life, and most of all nina. it seemed somehow ironic that the boy who had been cautioned by the garda so much during his youth for spray painting, busking without a liscence, and raucous parties would become the grumpy, aloof overseas student studying a degree in criminology; that his once reckless spirit could be crushed so easily. 

of all things that finn could be called, straightforward would never be one of them. ever since his first days in atticus, the boy was pegged as hostile, hot-headed, cynical, rude. he seemed to spend more time in his thoughts than engaging in conversation. like a ticking time-bomb, finn’s anger was of the calm kind, liable to explode without a moment’s noticed. his unpredictable personality make him something of an enigma to those who aren’t amiable with the lad, though hostile as he may appear, he harvests a good heart. loyalty lies at the centre of his affections, and whilst his friends are few in number, he makes a lifelong partner. somewhere within finn, there’s still some fight left, but mostly he has recognised that his hedonistic lifestyle did little to leave him fulfilled – mostly, it just emptied him out – and over his three years at university has resigned himself to a nihilistic predicament.

        if u wanna plot with me pls pls pls im me or like this post!! i am always game for plots i love em so excited to write with you all here r some ideas

study buddies. finn is now a phd student so has to start takin shit seriously. he gon be in the library every day doing that independent study. if he had ppl who were also regular library goers n they get each other coffees to save time.... tht wld be sweet

ppl who love techno dj sets and going super hard on the weekends!!! fuck yea

friends with benefits. exes on bad terms. ppl he tried to date but couldnt because he’s always emotionally hung up on someone else. spicy hook up plots

ppl he met touring?? maybe ppl who were also in the entertainment industry..... anyone got a character who is ex circus hit me up

does anyone else study criminology / forensics / criminal psych / law? phd students sometimes lecture so he cld be an assistant lecturer / tutor if ur character is in a younger year

gamers !!! social recluses !!! hermits !!

finn goes to the skatepark and all the young boys there think he’s a gradnpa which he is! 

[carolunea-matea]

Mistletoe

A/N: Well this is my first time trying out a writing challenge.  And of course, I take on a 12-part challenge. @like-a-bag-of-potatoes and @thing-you-do-with-that-thing are running Kari and Ida’s 12 days of SPN Christmas.  This is day seven. Mistletoe

“I’ll see you tonight at the party?” Jade asked me as we were pulling our coats on, getting ready to leave work.

“I don’t know. I hate going to these things dateless.” I shrugged.

“Oh, come on! It’s going to be fun! Maybe you’ll meet someone!” She wiggled her eyebrows making me laugh.

“Maybe…” I really didn’t have anything else to do.

“Look, Sam’s big brother just moved to town. I’m sure he doesn’t have any plans tonight. Let me text Sam and see if Dean is up for the party tonight. If he is, I’ll tell him to pick you up at your house around 7:30. Worst case scenario, you end up with a new friend and we get to spend more time together!”

“A blind date? Really, J?” she was already texting Sam. I rolled my eyes.

“He’s related to Sam, Carebear! Practically raised him! He can’t be that bad! Sam did graduate from Stanford with honors after all.”

She had a point. Sam was a great guy. This couldn’t be that bad.

“Yes! Dean will be at your place at 7:30! I’m so excited! I ‘ve been wanting to set you two up since Sam told me he was moving here!”

I just shook my head and laughed.

“Well now I have to go get all cute and shit. Thank god this is a dressy casual thing. I don’t think I could handle having to get all decked out tonight. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

We waved good bye as we headed for our cars.

 By the time I got home it was almost 6 o’clock. I jumped in the shower after pulling out my dark skinny jeans, a burgundy sweater, and a dark green top to so underneath.

It was almost 7 by the time I had my hair dried and curled, makeup applied, and was running around my house looking for my knee-high boots. I had finally found them when my doorbell rang.

��Coming!” I yelled as I hopped down my hallway pulling on my left boot. I knocked into the table I dropped my mail and keys on every day.

“Ow! Fuck!” I was still rubbing my hip as I opened the door.

There before me stood an emerald eyed, dark haired, drop dead gorgeous man.

“Hey, you must be Caroline. You ok?” He was smirking obviously having heard my run in with the table.

I laughed, “Yeah, the table just attacked me is all. Nice to meet you. Come in. I still have to get my coat.”

He walked in and shut the door behind him. I led him to the living room and told him to make himself at home.

“So, you and Jade work together at the hospital?” He asked as I dug through the closet looking for my leather jacket.

“Yeah. She’s one of my techs in the main pharmacy. We’ve worked together for, wow for five years now. I actually remember when she met Sam. She was like a school girl! Couldn’t wait to talk about every date they had.” I chuckled at the memory.

“Yeah, Sammy would call me after every date, too. She’d a good woman. She’s good for my brother.”

“Sam’s a great guy. J told me you practically raised him. You did a good job.” I had just pulled on my burgundy hat and match gloves and was buttoning my short leather trench.

“Thanks. Dad was on the road a lot. Mom, she passed when Sammy was six months old. Our Uncle Bobby watched us a lot, but yeah. We pretty much only had each other.”

I grabbed my purse, “Ok, I’m ready.”

“Let’s party!” Dean joked standing up and opening the door for me. He offered me his arm with a goofy grin on his face.

“Why thank you, kind sir!” I teased in a southern belle accent.

We laughed as we walked to his car. My jaw dropped.

“Holy Shit! A 67 Impala? She’s beautiful!” I walked around his car impressed.

“A woman who knows her cars. Nice.”

“Not all cars. But this, this is my dream car.” Dean was opening the passenger side door for me. I got in and rubbed the dash and the seats before pulling on my seat belt.

“This is my Baby. She was my Dad’s. When he passed, I got her.”

Dean had just bought his own mechanic shop. We talked about cars, my job, how cute Sam and Jade were together. All the random first date stuff. We were laughing about our favorite episode of Friends when we pulled up to the bar the Christmas party was at. Sam and Jade were just arriving as well.

“Well look at you two, laughing and getting along,” Sam teased and Dean opened my door for me.

“Hush, Sammy. Respect your elders!” I teased right back.

“Oh God, you’ve already started telling her stories, haven’t you?” Sam glared at Dean while I gave Jade a hug.

“Oh my God! How did I not think about that? Dean, please! You have to!” I gave Sam a hung before spinning around to look at Dean.

“Oh, there are tons of them! We have all night. Let’s get inside and get drinks. I hope there’s pie.” Dean grabbed my hand and led the way into the bar.

My co-workers called out to Jade and me with a chorus of “Merry Christmas”.  We said hello to everyone and I introduced Dean around.

“What’s your drink?” Dean asked in my ear so I could hear him over the noise in the bar. I got chills.

“Captain and Diet and a shot of Patron.”

“Coming up!” Dean and Sam walked to the bar to get the first round of drinks. As soon as they were far enough away, I smacked Jade’s arms.

“Dude! You didn’t warn me about how hot he is!”

She laughed.

“Well what did you expect? He’s related to Sam.”

“Fair point. But, my God, those eyes!” I fanned myself to further my point.

We pulled off our outerwear and hung them on chairs reserved for our party as Dean and Sam walked back with our drinks. We drank to Christmas and family with our shots and settled in to our seats.

“Ok, everyone! We have our food to the left and we’re going to start karaoke in about twenty minutes. Solo, duets, and groups are all welcome! Let’s have some fun tonight!” The head nurse of the hospital’s trauma center, Meaghan, announced.

We all cheered as people started going to sign up.

“Santa Baby?” I asked Jade. It was a sort of tradition for the two of us to perform the song together.

“Absolutely!”

I told them I’d be right back and went to sign us up.

“You guys carrying on tradition?” Stephanie, one of the trauma nurse’s asked.

“Of course!”

“Who is that guy you walked in with? He’s fucking hot!”

“Dean. He’s Sam’s brother and just moved into town. J fixed us up on a blind date tonight,” I explained, taking a large sip of my drink.

“Good luck!” Steph said while nudging me with her shoulder. I laughed as I walked away.

Back at the table, Jade and Sam were smiling widely while Dean shot a dirty look at them.

“Whoa! What did I miss?”

“Oh nothing,” Jade responded, not making it sound like nothing.

I shrugged it off and sat back down.

Two and a half drinks later, Jade and I were called up to do our song.

“Now up, your favorite duet in the pharmacy and at the Christmas party, Caroline and Jade!”

Our group cheered and Sam and Dean threw in a couple cat calls.

Jade and I laughed our way to the stage.

Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree for me Been an awful good girl Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Jade began the song giggling.

Santa baby, a '67 Impala too, dark blue I'll wait up for you, dear Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

I sang, walking toward Dean, shrugging at the color of the car, shooting him a wink. We were now standing in front of Sam and Dean and pulled them to the stage with us.

Think of all the fun I've missed Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed Next year I could be also good If you'll check off my Christmas list

We alternated the lines. Circling the men while we continued.

Santa baby, I want a yacht and really that's not a lot Been an angel all year Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa honey one thing I really do need, the deed To a platinum mine Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa cutie, and fill my stocking with a duplex and checks Sign your 'x' on the line Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Come and trim my Christmas tree With some decorations bought at Tiffany I really do believe in you Let's see if you believe in me

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing, a ring I don't mean on the phone Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight Hurry down the chimney tonight Hurry, tonight

 When we finished, we turned back to the guys to see Sam down on one knee. My jaw dropped as I turned my face to look at Jade, who had dropped her microphone. I slowly walked to stand next to Dean.

“Jade, we’ve been together for four years. I don’t want to spend anymore time not being your husband. Will you marry me?”

The room had fallen silent. Our co-workers all holding their breath waiting for Jade’s answer.

“Of course, I will,” she replied in a barely audible whisper.

“She said Yes!!” I screamed jumping up and down in excitement, tears streaming down my face.

The room erupted in applause while Sam slipped the ring on Jade’s finger before they kissed.

They were the talk of the rest of the party. Everyone congratulating them and hugging the couple while we were dancing.

Dean and I walked over to the food table and began filling our plates. We were about to head back to our table when I heard Sam yell, “Hey Dean! Look up!”

We both looked up to notice we were standing directly under a mistletoe.

Dean smiled taking both of our plates and putting them on the table. He placed one hand on my hip and the other on the back of my head.

“I’ve been waiting all night to find an excuse to do this,” he whispered against my lips before kissing me.

I could feel myself blushing as I stood on my toes, my hands traveling behind his neck.  His lips parted and kissed me deeper.

It wasn’t until I heard the cat calls from my co-workers that I slowly pulled away blushing bright red.

“I am so glad Jade talked me into coming tonight.” I was grinning ear to ear.

@idk-wtf-is-happening (Merry Christmas, Darling!)

[peterjonesparker]

Are you interested in any oyher Spiderman characters? (Homecoming and/or not?)

oh hello!! honestly, i really loved all the characters in spiderman: homecoming. and i’m gonna be so extra right now and like…give mini headcanons for all my babes. so i’m sorry in advance. but like…

we have our decathlon team babies

so like…liz is totally the mama bear. she’s the only senior on the team because she was one of the founding members her junior year and her friends were all too busy focusing on their other extracurriculars and college apps so it was just a bunch of little freshman she’d managed to convince to join the team

and liz did so much research and trained the team and asked her cousin who won a decathlon competition when he was in high school what was helpful for their team

so she takes over and gets mr. harrington to work with the team and she shapes the team into one that could win

and they’re all her babies like let’s be honest

charles and abraham are the twins that are attached at the hip but never stop fighting. they’re the dynamic duo and what abraham doesn’t know, charles does. they’re best friends and they hang out all the time and they obsess over star trek and have a secret rivalry going on with ned and peter because they are the star wars kids. and they’re sworn to hate each other until the end of time. (but also charles and abraham will freak out when the trailer for the last jedi gets released and immediately text the group chat nerds in space to ask peter and ned what they thought.) and abraham has to smack charles on the head when the boy catches his friend staring at sally for too long and charles just mumbles something about how she had something on her shirt and it’s fine.

and then you have sally and cindy. who are just like…so done with the team half the time. like, you’ve got peter, ned, charles, and abraham who just spend all their time obsessing over space themed movies. and flash just constantly berates everyone. michelle is lowkey kinda scary. (they are also lowkey in love with her but shhh.) and liz is like…well, liz is their mom so they love liz. but even mr. harrington is a mess. but sally and cindy make the best of it because they love each other and they love decathlon and they watch a week’s worth of jeopardy together every sunday and they quiz each other in cindy’s mom’s car on the way to school. and they talk about sally’s small, minuscule crush on charles (”really, sally? charles??? he’s a nerd!!” “you think i don’t know that and am also disappointed in myself!!” “oh my goodness but you guys would be so cute who am i kidding”) and they talk about cindy’s very large crush on betty brant (”cindy, she totally checked you out just now!!” “wHAT? omg, how is my hair??”). and they talk about which classes they’re taking so they can be in most of the same classes and they talk about college and their hearts lowkey break when they think about how cindy wants to stay in new york and sally wants to go to the west coast but they’ll be bffs forever so they have hope. (”we have skype, it’ll be okay, yeah?”)

and then you have flash. and flash has got so much shit going on like wtf dude. his parents are super wealthy and try to support him and try to be there but they’re always traveling for work and he’s basically been raised by his nanny. so it’s his nanny who pesters him about this massive crush he has on someone on the decathlon team because each day she picks him up from decathlon practice he’s always raging and sighing and looking sad. and flash just vehemently denies this. because that’s ridiculous, please don’t suggest something like that. but she knows him so well. she’s raised him. she just doesn’t realize that it’s fucking peter parker. peter parker who he terrorizes because he doesn’t want to deal with how he’s feeling. peter parker who has a great ass that he couldn’t help but slap that one time before nationals on the way to the pool. peter parker, who’s a dork and definitely not worthy of flash’s attention but has it anyway. so, maybe he’s not dealing healthily. but he’s got a silent war raging in his head and he doesn’t want to have to tell his parents that he’s bi because once his dad had made an offhand comment and it decided things for him. so flash just…rages and hides behind his wealth and intelligence and snaky comments. because he doesn’t wanna deal with anything

and omg i’ve talked about peter and mj and even ned a bit so i won’t write about them here but i love my babies so much okay???

we also have our peter parker protection squad

may parker, the loml. who’s characterization i can never get bc we have civil war may and then also homecoming may. but may parker who is a hero in her own right because we all know about that scene where she saves a little girl and doesn’t mention it that got cut from the movie. (rip me, honestly.) and like…can we talk about may?? because she seems like such a groovy, fun loving person. and she was married to her husband ben. they were totally wild in college or something. just…always doing crazy shit and laughing and having sex and just enjoying being with each other. and then they get married and get jobs and live together, being happy little hippies. (maybe they partake in some substances, idk, you never know.) and then her husband’s brother and wife die and they’re taking in peter parker. and may falls in love with this little boy because he’s so…good. and she and ben raise him as their own and try to give him an exciting and happy childhood and encourage his interests in science and his friendship with ned. and then he tells them he’s joining the decathlon team and there’s a field trip and he’s so excited about life. and then he acts all dodgy and then ben dies. and like…may is heartbroken. because ben was her person. and peter’s stopped talking to her. but then he gets the stark internship (which he didn’t tell her about, so rude) and then he’s happy and if he’s happy then she’s happy because she takes every good thing she can these days because they are so far and few between. so she takes every little piece of happiness she can find in life. like talking to mr. delmar and chatting with his daughter she’s she in the shop. like the woman who sells flowers on the corner on her way to work. like the cute couple that works at the supermarket by the apartment who give her recipes like ones for walnut date bread. and even like tony stark, who for whatever reason has become peter’s mentor of sorts and who makes him happy. and if someone makes her nephew happy, they make her happy

and dad!tony. who gives his spider son anything he wants and invites him upstate every so often so he can train with the avengers and learn to control his powers. because even if he isn’t going to be an avenger, he’s still going to be your friendly neighborhood spiderman. and he throws peter parker a birthday party in the summer at a fancy restaurant he’s bought out for the night. and all of peter’s little high school friends come and tony’s happy to give this to peter because the kid just needs to be a kid and needs to be happy. and don’t think tony doesn’t notice the way peter’s eyes follow that girl michelle all night. the girl who’s also asking him all these questions about the sokovia accords and his decision to move upstate and how he almost let a bunch of avenger and alien tech get stolen and about wakanda and if he’s ever been. and tony just wishes peter good luck at the end of the night and smiles because the boy is so confused. (if peter doesn’t realize it yet, oh goodness, good luck to this boy, honestly.) and tony pulls some strings to make sure that peter gets into mit and then finds out that he didn’t even need to because peter’s already a great candidate. and when he helps peter move into his dorm and sees michelle there, who just so happens to go to harvard down the block, well, peter just smiles and wishes peter good luck again

happy hogan disappointed me and doesn’t get to have a whole paragraph. but he can REDEEM HIMSELF later on because peter is a smol bean and needs protection and happy starts answering his calls and listening to his voicemails. and maybe happy laughs occasionally at the lame jokes peter makes, but that’s bESIDE THE POINT

and then just like...our small mentions

aaron davis exists in mcu and mentioned his nephew MILES MORALES. like, dude, idek what they’re gonna do with miles morales but i am soooo hype. idek. i am just so excited. bc donald glover was inspired as aaron davis. (“i like bread!) he was such a cool character and i wanna know if he becomes the prowler. and i wanna see him with his family and talking to his little nephew about how he met spiderman twice and he was like…a chill dude and he’s doing his part to keep their home safe. and miles morales is probably like…the biggest fan of spiderman and dresses up as him for halloween and then one day he gets bitten by this crazy huge spider while visiting his favorite uncle aaron and he starts developing superpowers? like omg this is his greatest dream come true? and then he starts going out in hopes of finding spiderman so he can team up with the dude that once saved his uncle. and then one day he’s trying to stop a mugging and spiderman comes and is just like…”what??” so they stop the muggers and then they go to a rooftop and spiderman is super confused like, “what? you have my powers?? how did this happen?” and miles is just like, “omg! you’re the spiderman! you’re my hero! omg! hi, i just want to help!!” and then maybe we get an older and younger brother dynamic between the two? idk i’m just excited to see what happens because they have to put miles morales in mcu. it’s decided

also i don’t think she’s gonna be in mcu but i love my baby gwen stacy. my smart beautiful dorky bean gwen. and i love when she’s put into fics. and she was put into this fic as liz allan’s love interest and it was inspired and i fell in love. so. yes. #putgweninfic2k17

not sure if this is what you were asking for but here it is anyway!

[kunoichihatakebranchaccount]

#191 358 questions

I don’t paint my nails. I shake my leg a lot. I used to like ‘The Office’, but now I can’t stand it. I actually watch Disney Channel sometimes. And like it. My laptop is a piece of crap and I wish I could get a new one. My favorite show is LOST. My favorite movies consist of LOTR, V for Vendetta, Across The Universe, etc. I need a new iPod. I spend WAY too much time online. I LOVE to read. I LOVE Green Tea. I have Hypothyroidism. I also have Asthma. My cell phone cover looks like a condom. I am mostly Polish. This dumb guy drives down my street every day blasting his bass. It’s really annoying. I love watching Law & Order: SVU. I know how to knit. And sew. I am currently in the process of writing a novel. I have been to 4 colleges. And have finally realized what I am going to major in. I am majoring in English. I hope to become a famous author. I take too many surveys a day. Waffles are way better than pancakes. I love reading outside, and wish I could do it every day. Johnny Depp is the best! I have a cat. I have a new car. I have more purses than I can count. I’m pro-choice. I’m totally for gay marriage. I’m straight. I fear I won’t find someone to spend the rest of my life with. I pee way too much. I am obsessed with The Beatles. I own a TON of Beatles paraphernalia. John Lennon is my favorite Beatle. My favorite color is Green. I watch Baseball. I watch Hockey. I hate Football & Golf. I love Yoga. I love the Wii & Wii Fit. I feel like I was born in the wrong time era. I wish I was alive in the 60s & 70s. I have arch pain. I stay up WAY too late. I always have to have chapstick with me. I am trying to lose weight. The only reality shows I can stand are ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8’ & ‘What Not To Wear’. I love lotion. I am kind of germaphobic. I carry hand sanitizer with me at all times. I hate public bathrooms. I’m a vegetarian. I get migraines all the time. I love to go bike riding. If I get married, I don’t know if I want kids or not. I have made a few surveys before. I’m pretty lonely. I always feel left out. I can spell well. I have to sleep in complete darkness. I suffer from insomnia. I am on Xanga 24/7. I am subscribed to a few magazines. I have lost a loved one to cancer. A certain type of cancer runs in my family. I always feel tired. I have more books and DVDs than I can count. I seem to always be sick. I like long surveys better than short ones. I’m a kid at heart. My room is really messy. I have more things in my room than I should be able to fit. I need more money. I need a second job. I have an older sister and a younger sister. I am on a ton of medications. I’ve had soooo many x-rays. I go through sooo many adapters for my laptop a year. I don’t know what my natural hair color is anymore. I’d rather be pale than be tan and get skin cancer. I love being pale anyways. My favorite bookstore is Borders. My favorite department store is Target. My favorite clothing store is Forever 21. I spend most of my time in Borders and/or Target. I am older than 18. School’s over for me for the summer. History fascinates me. Fantasy/Horror books are my favorite. There are a ton of movies I need to watch. I’m going to go read. Then I’m going to go to bed You’re a girl. You like that fact. Even when you have really bad cramps you think it’s better than being a guy   You think boys are SO confusing. You always say you hate someone then and up talking to them not long later. You forgive people who shouldn’t be forgiven. You have multiple best friends. You’re still close friends with one of your childhood friends. You have lost lots of friends. You are single. You are under 18. You are in high school. You hate/ hated high school. You hate guys that think they can get any girl. You tend to be attracted to players. You always choose looks over personality and you hate that about you. Your group of friends has changed a lot in the past year. You miss your ex. You cry every day. You over think way too much. You’re incredibly insecure. You feel like people are just being nice when they compliment you. You can’t ever believe that someone really loves you. You have a tumblr. You’re addicted to the Internet. You prefer twitter over Facebook. You think Facebook’s too judgmental. You hate guys who just want to have sex. You love indie rock. You love One Direction. You create scenarios in your head that will never ever happen. You look back at your past and are like, wtf was I thinking?! You know a lot of people named Alyssa. You’re nice to everyone no matter what. You like to meet new people and make new friends. Finding new songs you love is one of the best feelings. You wish the person you loved, loved you back. You try to make your ex jealous often. Someone broke your trust that you NEVER thought would. High school changed one of your best friends. Your parents are divorced. You have step-siblings. You live close to one of your best friends. You know a lot of people at your school. Looking good is important to you. You love fashion. You’re SUPER lazy. You don’t text that many people. You like to answer questions & take surveys. You have a cat. You have a dog. You hate when people complain a lot on Facebook. You have Facebook stalked a hot guy. You love your bed. You love sleep. You love food. You think you’re fat. You don’t think you’re pretty at all. You like to do/ say provocative things. You like to sing & dance even if you’re not good at it. You’re not good at any sports. You’re incredibly stubborn. You want to travel the world. You never seem to have any classes with your best friends in school. You have an ex that you absolutely hate. You are a virgin. You have had more than 5 relationships in the past. You want a really cute relationship. You like guys taller than you. You love when guys smell good. You think football players are hot. You’ve dreamed of being a cheerleader before. ^ & you’ve dreamt of dating a football player before. You get bored easily. You’re bored of this survey. You love music. You wear mismatch socks. You love plaid. You always have to keep your legs shaved. You like your nails painted. You love indie music. You’ve dyed your hair quite a bit. You’re afraid of dolls. You suffer from depression. You have a boyfriend. Your eyes are hazel. You have long eyelashes. You need braces. You suffer from an eating disorder. You play the piano. You’ve recovered from self-harming. You’re only energetic & hyper around people you know. But you’re super quiet & shy around people you don’t know. You have freckles. You have your ears pierced. You sleep in extremely late. You don’t go to bed until it’s light outside. You’re a grammar nazi. You’re terrified of spiders. You’ve been in a psych unit for depression. Your birthday is in December. Your favourite season is summer. You shower everyday. You wear make-up, but not a lot. You share a room with your brother & mom. -.- You’ve been homeless before. You have money problems. You’ve been pregnant before. But didn’t have the baby… The only friends you have live in different states. You do your own laundry. You watch Teen Mom. :’D You’re schizophrenic. You have a lot of clothes that you don’t wear. You cut up your own clothes to make them cuter. You put salt or ketchup on almost anything. You HATE raisins. You have a niece. You’re 15 years old. You love the color purple. You love alternative music. You’re currently in high school. You love your school. You’re attracted to coy boys. (: You’re sensitive. You cry easily. You’ve been so depressed, you couldn’t get outta bed. You’re always hungry, but can’t eat. You’ve attempted suicide. You’ve had your first kiss. You’ve been in love. You like to draw. You love to sing. You have 8 siblings. You’re the youngest on your mom’s side. You have a relative in the military. You have 2 tattoos. You’ve broken a bone. You aren’t flexible. You absolutely despise Nicki Minaj. You hate Lil Wayne, but like a couple of his songs. You’re a fan of Tech N9ne. You’re underweight. You put others before yourself. You’re a people pleaser. Satan himself temporarily takes over you when you’re on your period. When you’re nauseous, you become violent. You’re addicted to soda. You dress weirdly, but like it. You’re currently looking for a job. You’re always the one standing out. You’ve been severely bullied. You overcame your depression. You still get sad from time to time, though. You’ve been back stabbed by a girl who you thought was your best friend. You’ve been cheated more than once by just one guy. You’re easily forgiving, but you never forget what’s said & done. Your favourite movie is LOL. You enjoy romance movies. Also, chick flicks. You have short hair. You get car sick. I love Barry M nail paints. I sometimes think I eat too much. The person I have feelings for is younger than me. I can be quite stubborn sometimes. I’m always too shy to tell someone if I like them. I love those random conversations that make no sense. I’m legally old enough to drink … but I don’t go out drinking too often. I’m single. I’m more of an evening person than a morning person. I’ve read all of the Harry Potter books. I’m not very flirty. I spend a lot of time with my family. People always seem to text me when I have no credit to text back. Pasta is one of my favourite foods. I worry a lot about what other people think of me. My toenails are painted purple. One of my friends is pregnant. Chocolate always cheers me up when I’m feeling down. I tend to get embarrassed and blush easily. I’ve never been cheated on. I prefer Facebook messages to comments. I suffer from migraines. I hardly ever drink coffee. I feel insecure sometimes. I like prawn cocktail flavour crisps. I always make an effort to keep in touch with the people who matter to me. Mariah Carey is one of my favourite singers… …But I listen to all different types of music. I miss someone right now. I haven’t texted anyone in ages. People can be quite protective of me sometimes. I’ve never had unprotected sex. I find it hard to lie to the people I care about. I like the sensation of butterflies in the stomach. Talking on the phone makes me feel awkward. I’m easily amused. Most of my friends are in relationships. I usually keep my phone on silent. I love to sing. My best friend is pretty. I’m hungry. I hold back from saying what I think a lot of the time. I love Bourbon biscuits. Most people think I look younger than my actual age. I wish I was taller. My birthday is in April. I’ve never smoked. I don’t have casual sex. I think Leona Lewis is pretty. I don’t like to draw too much attention to myself. I haven’t bought any new CDs for ages. I prefer to wear my hair down. I hate guys who think they’re God’s gift to women. When I was younger, I used to love pop groups like Steps, S Club 7 and Atomic Kitten. I slept alone last night. I use conditioner every time I wash my hair. I was born in the 90’s. I have blue eyes. I don’t have a flat stomach … … But I’m not worried about my weight. My hair isn’t dyed. I was obsessed with Pokémon when I was a kid. I don’t like to bottle up my feelings … … But I sometimes struggle to talk about them because I’m not sure what to say. I sometimes miss the way things used to be. I’ve had singing lessons. I’m British. I hardly ever wear white … … Because I can’t seem to keep white things white, no matter how hard I try. I’m straight. One of my best friends is gay. My hair isn’t straightened. My friends think I have strange taste when it comes to guys. I will be staying at home tonight. I’m agnostic. I’m quite romantic. One of my friends is engaged. I sometimes feel like I take things for granted. :/ The last person I hugged was a family member. I like looking at old photos … … Even if I look bad in them, just for old times sake. I only dance when drunk. I’m a forgiving person. I listen to music by Evanescence. I listened to music by Paramore. I listened to music by 30 Seconds To Mars. I don’t have a problem with being single … … But sometimes I feel a little bit lonely. I can’t whistle. I dislike watching the news. I haven’t had sex recently … … And that doesn’t bother me. My favourite type of chocolate is Galaxy. I don’t wear shoes with high heels. I feel embarrassed when I see photos of myself as a child..

[zolganif]

I don’t paint my nails. I shake my leg a lot. I used to like ‘The Office’, but now I can’t stand it. I actually watch Disney Channel sometimes. And like it. My laptop is a piece of crap and I wish I could get a new one. My favorite show is LOST. My favorite movies consist of LOTR, V for Vendetta, Across The Universe, etc. I need a new iPod. I spend WAY too much time online. I LOVE to read. I LOVE Green Tea. I have Hypothyroidism. I also have Asthma. My cell phone cover looks like a condom. I am mostly Polish. This dumb guy drives down my street every day blasting his bass. It’s really annoying. I love watching Law & Order: SVU. I know how to knit. And sew. I am currently in the process of writing a novel. I have been to 4 colleges. And have finally realized what I am going to major in. I am majoring in English. I hope to become a famous author. I take too many surveys a day. Waffles are way better than pancakes. I love reading outside, and wish I could do it every day. Johnny Depp is the best! I have a cat. I have a new car. I have more purses than I can count. I’m pro-choice. I’m totally for gay marriage. I’m straight. I fear I won’t find someone to spend the rest of my life with. I pee way too much. I am obsessed with The Beatles. I own a TON of Beatles paraphernalia. John Lennon is my favorite Beatle. My favorite color is Green. I watch Baseball. I watch Hockey. I hate Football & Golf. I love Yoga. I love the Wii & Wii Fit. I feel like I was born in the wrong time era. I wish I was alive in the 60s & 70s. I have arch pain. I stay up WAY too late. I always have to have chapstick with me. I am trying to lose weight. The only reality shows I can stand are ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8’ & ‘What Not To Wear’. I love lotion. I am kind of germaphobic. I carry hand sanitizer with me at all times. I hate public bathrooms. I’m a vegetarian. I get migraines all the time. I love to go bike riding. If I get married, I don’t know if I want kids or not. I have made a few surveys before. I’m pretty lonely. I always feel left out. I can spell well. I have to sleep in complete darkness. I suffer from insomnia. I am on Xanga 24/7. I am subscribed to a few magazines. I have lost a loved one to cancer. A certain type of cancer runs in my family. I always feel tired. I have more books and DVDs than I can count. I seem to always be sick. I like long surveys better than short ones. I’m a kid at heart. My room is really messy. I have more things in my room than I should be able to fit. I need more money. I need a second job. I have an older sister and a younger sister. I am on a ton of medications. I’ve had soooo many x-rays. I go through sooo many adapters for my laptop a year. I don’t know what my natural hair color is anymore. I’d rather be pale than be tan and get skin cancer. I love being pale anyways. My favorite bookstore is Borders. My favorite department store is Target. My favorite clothing store is Forever 21. I spend most of my time in Borders and/or Target. I am older than 18. School’s over for me for the summer. History fascinates me. Fantasy/Horror books are my favorite. There are a ton of movies I need to watch. I’m going to go read. Then I’m going to go to bed You’re a girl. You like that fact. Even when you have really bad cramps you think it’s better than being a guy   You think boys are SO confusing. You always say you hate someone then and up talking to them not long later. You forgive people who shouldn’t be forgiven. You have multiple best friends. You’re still close friends with one of your childhood friends. You have lost lots of friends. You are single. You are under 18. You are in high school. You hate/ hated high school. You hate guys that think they can get any girl. You tend to be attracted to players. You always choose looks over personality and you hate that about you. Your group of friends has changed a lot in the past year. You miss your ex. You cry every day. You over think way too much. You’re incredibly insecure. You feel like people are just being nice when they compliment you. You can’t ever believe that someone really loves you. You have a tumblr. You’re addicted to the Internet. You prefer twitter over Facebook. You think Facebook’s too judgmental. You hate guys who just want to have sex. You love indie rock. You love One Direction. You create scenarios in your head that will never ever happen. You look back at your past and are like, wtf was I thinking?! You know a lot of people named Alyssa. You’re nice to everyone no matter what. You like to meet new people and make new friends. Finding new songs you love is one of the best feelings. You wish the person you loved, loved you back. You try to make your ex jealous often. Someone broke your trust that you NEVER thought would. High school changed one of your best friends. Your parents are divorced. You have step-siblings. You live close to one of your best friends. You know a lot of people at your school. Looking good is important to you. You love fashion. You’re SUPER lazy. You don’t text that many people. You like to answer questions & take surveys. You have a cat. You have a dog. You hate when people complain a lot on Facebook. You have Facebook stalked a hot guy. You love your bed. You love sleep. You love food. You think you’re fat. You don’t think you’re pretty at all. You like to do/ say provocative things. You like to sing & dance even if you’re not good at it. You’re not good at any sports. You’re incredibly stubborn. You want to travel the world. You never seem to have any classes with your best friends in school. You have an ex that you absolutely hate. You are a virgin. You have had more than 5 relationships in the past. You want a really cute relationship. You like guys taller than you. You love when guys smell good. You think football players are hot. You’ve dreamed of being a cheerleader before. ^ & you’ve dreamt of dating a football player before. You get bored easily. You’re bored of this survey. You love music. You wear mismatch socks. You love plaid. You always have to keep your legs shaved. You like your nails painted. You love indie music. You’ve dyed your hair quite a bit. You’re afraid of dolls. You suffer from depression. You have a boyfriend. Your eyes are hazel. You have long eyelashes. You need braces. You suffer from an eating disorder. You play the piano. You’ve recovered from self-harming. You’re only energetic & hyper around people you know. But you’re super quiet & shy around people you don’t know. You have freckles. You have your ears pierced. You sleep in extremely late. You don’t go to bed until it’s light outside. You’re a grammar nazi. You’re terrified of spiders. You’ve been in a psych unit for depression. Your birthday is in December. Your favourite season is summer. You shower everyday. You wear make-up, but not a lot. You share a room with your brother & mom. -.- You’ve been homeless before. You have money problems. You’ve been pregnant before. But didn’t have the baby… The only friends you have live in different states. You do your own laundry. You watch Teen Mom. :’D You’re schizophrenic. You have a lot of clothes that you don’t wear. You cut up your own clothes to make them cuter. You put salt or ketchup on almost anything. You HATE raisins. You have a niece. You’re 15 years old. You love the color purple. You love alternative music. You’re currently in high school. You love your school. You’re attracted to coy boys. (: You’re sensitive. You cry easily. You’ve been so depressed, you couldn’t get outta bed. You’re always hungry, but can’t eat. You’ve attempted suicide. You’ve had your first kiss. You’ve been in love. You like to draw. You love to sing. You have 8 siblings. You’re the youngest on your mom’s side. You have a relative in the military. You have 2 tattoos. You’ve broken a bone. You aren’t flexible. You absolutely despise Nicki Minaj. You hate Lil Wayne, but like a couple of his songs. You’re a fan of Tech N9ne. You’re underweight. You put others before yourself. You’re a people pleaser. Satan himself temporarily takes over you when you’re on your period. When you’re nauseous, you become violent. You’re addicted to soda. You dress weirdly, but like it. You’re currently looking for a job. You’re always the one standing out. You’ve been severely bullied. You overcame your depression. You still get sad from time to time, though. You’ve been back stabbed by a girl who you thought was your best friend. You’ve been cheated more than once by just one guy. You’re easily forgiving, but you never forget what’s said & done. Your favourite movie is LOL. You enjoy romance movies. Also, chick flicks. You have short hair. You get car sick. I love Barry M nail paints. I sometimes think I eat too much. The person I have feelings for is younger than me. I can be quite stubborn sometimes. I’m always too shy to tell someone if I like them. I love those random conversations that make no sense. I’m legally old enough to drink … but I don’t go out drinking too often. I’m single. I’m more of an evening person than a morning person. I’ve read all of the Harry Potter books. I’m not very flirty. I spend a lot of time with my family. People always seem to text me when I have no credit to text back. Pasta is one of my favourite foods. I worry a lot about what other people think of me. My toenails are painted purple. One of my friends is pregnant. Chocolate always cheers me up when I’m feeling down. I tend to get embarrassed and blush easily. I’ve never been cheated on. I prefer Facebook messages to comments. I suffer from migraines. I hardly ever drink coffee. I feel insecure sometimes. I like prawn cocktail flavour crisps. I always make an effort to keep in touch with the people who matter to me. Mariah Carey is one of my favourite singers… …But I listen to all different types of music. I miss someone right now. I haven’t texted anyone in ages. People can be quite protective of me sometimes. I’ve never had unprotected sex. I find it hard to lie to the people I care about. I like the sensation of butterflies in the stomach. Talking on the phone makes me feel awkward. I’m easily amused. Most of my friends are in relationships. I usually keep my phone on silent. I love to sing. My best friend is pretty. I’m hungry. I hold back from saying what I think a lot of the time. I love Bourbon biscuits. Most people think I look younger than my actual age. I wish I was taller. My birthday is in April. I’ve never smoked. I don’t have casual sex. I think Leona Lewis is pretty. I don’t like to draw too much attention to myself. I haven’t bought any new CDs for ages. I prefer to wear my hair down. I hate guys who think they’re God’s gift to women. When I was younger, I used to love pop groups like Steps, S Club 7 and Atomic Kitten. I slept alone last night. I use conditioner every time I wash my hair. I was born in the 90’s. I have blue eyes. I don’t have a flat stomach … … But I’m not worried about my weight. My hair isn’t dyed. I was obsessed with Pokémon when I was a kid. I don’t like to bottle up my feelings … … But I sometimes struggle to talk about them because I’m not sure what to say. I sometimes miss the way things used to be. I’ve had singing lessons. I’m British. I hardly ever wear white … … Because I can’t seem to keep white things white, no matter how hard I try. I’m straight. One of my best friends is gay. My hair isn’t straightened. My friends think I have strange taste when it comes to guys. I will be staying at home tonight. I’m agnostic. I’m quite romantic. One of my friends is engaged. I sometimes feel like I take things for granted. :/ The last person I hugged was a family member. I like looking at old photos … … Even if I look bad in them, just for old times sake. I only dance when drunk. I’m a forgiving person. I listen to music by Evanescence. I listened to music by Paramore. I listened to music by 30 Seconds To Mars. I don’t have a problem with being single … … But sometimes I feel a little bit lonely. I can’t whistle. I dislike watching the news. I haven’t had sex recently … … And that doesn’t bother me. My favourite type of chocolate is Galaxy. I don’t wear shoes with high heels. I feel embarrassed when I see photos of myself as a child..

[cuddlebunny698-blog]

I don’t paint my nails.I shake my leg a lot.I used to like ‘The Office’, but now I can’t stand it.I actually watch Disney Channel sometimes. And like it. My laptop is a piece of crap and I wish I could get a new one. My favorite show is LOST. My favorite movies consist of LOTR, V for Vendetta, Across The Universe, etc. I need a new iPod. I spend WAY too much time online. I LOVE to read. I LOVE Green Tea. I have Hypothyroidism. I also have Asthma. My cell phone cover looks like a condom. I am mostly Polish. This dumb guy drives down my street every day blasting his bass. It’s really annoying. I love watching Law & Order: SVU. I know how to knit. And sew. I am currently in the process of writing a novel. I have been to 4 colleges. And have finally realized what I am going to major in. I am majoring in English. I hope to become a famous author. I take too many surveys a day. Waffles are way better than pancakes. I love reading outside, and wish I could do it every day. Johnny Depp is the best! I have a cat. I have a new car. I have more purses than I can count. I’m pro-choice. I’m totally for gay marriage. I’m straight. I fear I won’t find someone to spend the rest of my life with. I pee way too much. I am obsessed with The Beatles. I own a TON of Beatles paraphernalia. John Lennon is my favorite Beatle. My favorite color is Green. I watch Baseball. I watch Hockey. I hate Football & Golf. I love Yoga. I love the Wii & Wii Fit. I feel like I was born in the wrong time era. I wish I was alive in the 60s & 70s. I have arch pain. I stay up WAY too late. I always have to have chapstick with me. I am trying to lose weight. The only reality shows I can stand are ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8’ & ‘What Not To Wear’. I love lotion. I am kind of germaphobic. I carry hand sanitizer with me at all times. I hate public bathrooms. I’m a vegetarian. I get migraines all the time. I love to go bike riding. If I get married, I don’t know if I want kids or not. I have made a few surveys before. I’m pretty lonely. I always feel left out. I can spell well. I have to sleep in complete darkness. I suffer from insomnia. I am on Xanga 24/7. I am subscribed to a few magazines. I have lost a loved one to cancer. A certain type of cancer runs in my family. I always feel tired. I have more books and DVDs than I can count. I seem to always be sick. I like long surveys better than short ones. I’m a kid at heart. My room is really messy. I have more things in my room than I should be able to fit. I need more money. I need a second job. I have an older sister and a younger sister. I am on a ton of medications. I’ve had soooo many x-rays. I go through sooo many adapters for my laptop a year. I don’t know what my natural hair color is anymore. I’d rather be pale than be tan and get skin cancer. I love being pale anyways. My favorite bookstore is Borders. My favorite department store is Target. My favorite clothing store is Forever 21. I spend most of my time in Borders and/or Target. I am older than 18. School’s over for me for the summer. History fascinates me. Fantasy/Horror books are my favorite. There are a ton of movies I need to watch. I’m going to go read. Then I’m going to go to bed You’re a girl. You like that fact. Even when you have really bad cramps you think it’s better than being a guy   You think boys are SO confusing. You always say you hate someone then and up talking to them not long later. You forgive people who shouldn’t be forgiven. You have multiple best friends. You’re still close friends with one of your childhood friends. You have lost lots of friends. You are single. You are under 18. You are in high school. You hate/ hated high school. You hate guys that think they can get any girl. You tend to be attracted to players. You always choose looks over personality and you hate that about you. Your group of friends has changed a lot in the past year. You miss your ex. You cry every day. You over think way too much. You’re incredibly insecure. You feel like people are just being nice when they compliment you. You can’t ever believe that someone really loves you. You have a tumblr. You’re addicted to the Internet. You prefer twitter over Facebook. You think Facebook’s too judgmental. You hate guys who just want to have sex. You love indie rock. You love One Direction. You create scenarios in your head that will never ever happen. You look back at your past and are like, wtf was I thinking?! You know a lot of people named Alyssa. You’re nice to everyone no matter what. You like to meet new people and make new friends. Finding new songs you love is one of the best feelings. You wish the person you loved, loved you back. You try to make your ex jealous often. Someone broke your trust that you NEVER thought would. High school changed one of your best friends. Your parents are divorced. You have step-siblings. You live close to one of your best friends. You know a lot of people at your school. Looking good is important to you. You love fashion. You’re SUPER lazy. You don’t text that many people. You like to answer questions & take surveys. You have a cat. You have a dog. You hate when people complain a lot on Facebook. You have Facebook stalked a hot guy. You love your bed. You love sleep. You love food. You think you’re fat. You don’t think you’re pretty at all. You like to do/ say provocative things. You like to sing & dance even if you’re not good at it. You’re not good at any sports. You’re incredibly stubborn. You want to travel the world. You never seem to have any classes with your best friends in school. You have an ex that you absolutely hate. You are a virgin. You have had more than 5 relationships in the past. You want a really cute relationship. You like guys taller than you. You love when guys smell good. You think football players are hot. You’ve dreamed of being a cheerleader before. ^ & you’ve dreamt of dating a football player before. You get bored easily. You’re bored of this survey. You love music. You wear mismatch socks. You love plaid. You always have to keep your legs shaved. You like your nails painted. You love indie music. You’ve dyed your hair quite a bit. You’re afraid of dolls. You suffer from depression. You have a boyfriend. Your eyes are hazel. You have long eyelashes. You need braces. You suffer from an eating disorder. You play the piano. You’ve recovered from self-harming. You’re only energetic & hyper around people you know. But you’re super quiet & shy around people you don’t know. You have freckles. You have your ears pierced. You sleep in extremely late. You don’t go to bed until it’s light outside. You’re a grammar nazi. You’re terrified of spiders. You’ve been in a psych unit for depression. Your birthday is in December. Your favourite season is summer. You shower everyday. You wear make-up, but not a lot. You share a room with your brother & mom. -.- You’ve been homeless before. You have money problems. You’ve been pregnant before. But didn’t have the baby… The only friends you have live in different states. You do your own laundry. You watch Teen Mom. :’D You’re schizophrenic. You have a lot of clothes that you don’t wear. You cut up your own clothes to make them cuter. You put salt or ketchup on almost anything. You HATE raisins. You have a niece. You’re 15 years old. You love the color purple. You love alternative music. You’re currently in high school. You love your school. You’re attracted to coy boys. (: You’re sensitive. You cry easily. You’ve been so depressed, you couldn’t get outta bed. You’re always hungry, but can’t eat. You’ve attempted suicide. You’ve had your first kiss. You’ve been in love. You like to draw. You love to sing. You have 8 siblings. You’re the youngest on your mom’s side. You have a relative in the military. You have 2 tattoos. You’ve broken a bone. You aren’t flexible. You absolutely despise Nicki Minaj. You hate Lil Wayne, but like a couple of his songs. You’re a fan of Tech N9ne. You’re underweight. You put others before yourself. You’re a people pleaser. Satan himself temporarily takes over you when you’re on your period. When you’re nauseous, you become violent. You’re addicted to soda. You dress weirdly, but like it. You’re currently looking for a job. You’re always the one standing out. You’ve been severely bullied. You overcame your depression. You still get sad from time to time, though. You’ve been back stabbed by a girl who you thought was your best friend. You’ve been cheated more than once by just one guy. You’re easily forgiving, but you never forget what’s said & done. Your favourite movie is LOL.

You enjoy romance movies. Also, chick flicks. You have short hair.

You get car sick. I love Barry M nail paints. I sometimes think I eat too much. The person I have feelings for is younger than me. I can be quite stubborn sometimes. I’m always too shy to tell someone if I like them. I love those random conversations that make no sense. I’m legally old enough to drink … but I don’t go out drinking too often. I’m single. I’m more of an evening person than a morning person. I’ve read all of the Harry Potter books. I’m not very flirty. I spend a lot of time with my family. People always seem to text me when I have no credit to text back. Pasta is one of my favourite foods. I worry a lot about what other people think of me. My toenails are painted purple. One of my friends is pregnant. Chocolate always cheers me up when I’m feeling down. I tend to get embarrassed and blush easily. I’ve never been cheated on. I prefer Facebook messages to comments. I suffer from migraines. I hardly ever drink coffee. I feel insecure sometimes. I like prawn cocktail flavour crisps. I always make an effort to keep in touch with the people who matter to me. Mariah Carey is one of my favourite singers… …But I listen to all different types of music. I miss someone right now. I haven’t texted anyone in ages. People can be quite protective of me sometimes. I’ve never had unprotected sex. I find it hard to lie to the people I care about. I like the sensation of butterflies in the stomach. Talking on the phone makes me feel awkward. I’m easily amused. Most of my friends are in relationships. I usually keep my phone on silent. I love to sing. My best friend is pretty. I’m hungry. I hold back from saying what I think a lot of the time. I love Bourbon biscuits. Most people think I look younger than my actual age. I wish I was taller. My birthday is in April. I’ve never smoked. I don’t have casual sex. I think Leona Lewis is pretty. I don’t like to draw too much attention to myself. I haven’t bought any new CDs for ages. I prefer to wear my hair down. I hate guys who think they’re God’s gift to women. When I was younger, I used to love pop groups like Steps, S Club 7 and Atomic Kitten. I slept alone last night. I use conditioner every time I wash my hair. I was born in the 90’s. I have blue eyes. I don’t have a flat stomach … … But I’m not worried about my weight. My hair isn’t dyed. I was obsessed with Pokémon when I was a kid. I don’t like to bottle up my feelings … … But I sometimes struggle to talk about them because I’m not sure what to say. I sometimes miss the way things used to be. I’ve had singing lessons. I’m British. I hardly ever wear white … … Because I can’t seem to keep white things white, no matter how hard I try. I’m straight. One of my best friends is gay. My hair isn’t straightened. My friends think I have strange taste when it comes to guys. I will be staying at home tonight. I’m agnostic. I’m quite romantic. One of my friends is engaged. I sometimes feel like I take things for granted. :/ The last person I hugged was a family member. I like looking at old photos … … Even if I look bad in them, just for old times sake. I only dance when drunk. I’m a forgiving person. I listen to music by Evanescence. I listened to music by Paramore. I listened to music by 30 Seconds To Mars. I don’t have a problem with being single … … But sometimes I feel a little bit lonely. I can’t whistle. I dislike watching the news. I haven’t had sex recently … … And that doesn’t bother me. My favourite type of chocolate is Galaxy. I don’t wear shoes with high heels.I feel embarrassed when I see photos of myself as a child..

[just-hazardous-thoughts]

Current chapter: winter is not coming but shitstorm is on its way

What about this relationship train wrecking thing that is going on at work, huh? Well, it’s hard to unveil but I’ll try my best for my own sake. I’m always writing for myself anyway.

These past months, we’ve been hiring a lot at work. We have needs hence the new recruits to help us out. When I joined the company a year ago we were around 12, now we’re over 30. Growing fast, right? We’re also moving out next year (though I’m not sure I’ll be around for that).

Anyway, I befriend one of my female coworkers three months ago and we bonded fast. I can’t remember how fast or how it happened but it did. Before her, I don’t even remember how I was doing in there. Not that I had a hard time but it’s just different when you have someone you can open yourself to, you know?

Since her, a lot of guys have been hired and as anyone can guess, shit’s going weird. They’re around my age and we began to form a bit of a crew (the three new guys aka "the 2 Be 3", my female coworker and me). It’s working well, they’re cool and we match. There’s still a bit of awkwardness as it’s really recent (2 weeks at best) but it’s ongoing and it’s pleasant.

But as the cliché needs to be more than just a cliché, it became… weird?

I don’t even know how to explain things but I feel weird vibes about them and my 6th sense is screaming at me that something’s off. I always trust my guts though my rational mind tends to calm me down like "Geez, you’re overthinking it". Not sure I am.

So there’s A. The first one who’s been hired 2 months ago. He’s doing a 6 months internship with us.

There’s B, who joined us a month ago and who’s there for the 2 next years as a part-timer (same as me with the same rhythm between his school and work).

And last but not least, there’s C, who joined us last week in my department (so now we’re two, yay!). He’s there for a year (same as me) and also has the same rhythm as B and me (as a part-timer).

Anyway, here are the 2 Be 3 that became close very quickly. Then there’s my female coworker and me.

Now onto my thing.

Since the early beginning, I felt like B was kind of sending signals towards me like when he mentioned to my female coworker (FC) that she and I were awfully close. My FC and B are in good terms so they talk a lot and he’s saying a lot of things to her that she then proceeds to tell me back (silly people still don’t understand that she tells me everything (like THE guy still talks to her about stuff smh)).  So he once mentioned that I had nice legs, this sort of things. Now said like that people might be like "Damn, it’s nothing, she’s clearly overthinking stuff" but there’s a lot more of these that I just can’t recall because my memory sucks. Anyway, if it’s not enough, at least trust my guts. They’re never wrong when it comes to guys and they never failed me once (but it could start, who knows?).

So about B, it’s weird. But let’s be clear, I wondered about the possibility and I just noped because I can’t see this happening. He’s not that attractive (to me) and he kind of repulses me when he eats his nails. Or maybe is it the fact that he farts aloud I’m not sure?

Then there’s A. Fucking A. Where do I begin?

When he arrived, he was sat on the desk next to me and I didn’t pay much attention. We were joking a lot with my FC (she was on the desk behind me at the time) and another coworker but three days later the desks were changed and reorganized due to our new recruits and where they were going to be fitted according to their department. So I was exiled on my own before B and C came on the desk in front of me (when we did that they weren’t hired yet).

I must say I was quite upset. I was being sent away from my FC and from the fun because I was going to be left alone on a deserted part with the tech (that don’t talk much). Though it’s completely wrong cause now I talk a lot with the tech and they’re just super duper cool. I just needed to get out there and talk with them. Silly me.

After that, nothing happened really. But after B and C joined, the crew came to life a bit and now I’m talking a lot with them. I feel like in high school once again when you hang out with a group. I guess I missed that. Of course, I see my friends outside of work and school but it’s not the same when you hang out this much with a group.

A week ago, there was our Team Building. We went to the Basque countries and it was awesome (much more compared to last year’s one). Trust me when I say this but nothing really happened, nothing. I just hanged out a lot with my FC and A. B missed both his trains, god knows how he managed to do that but the end result is that he couldn’t come, and C wasn’t scheduled to join us yet (#paperwork). We were just all really friendly, which is the sole purpose of a Team Building: tightening the links between us all.

So hear me well, last week, everything was still okay. Shit began to go downhill in the train bringing us back to Paris. Two nights before at one of the dinner, we were sitting next to each other (A and me) and I don’t remember how it came to that but we went on tinder and we both found each other. Of course, we matched for fun and the weirdness began. We pretended to be strangers talking for the first time and I must admit it was fun (though it may come out weird to some people). Back in Paris, I thought nothing much of it.

We ended up taking the train together to go back to our home if that matters.

Anyways, after that, we continued to play the pretend game on tinder. It was still okay but after a couple of days it just went from "lol it’s fun" to "wtf". We casually talked but on tinder. We did not switch to text messages even though we have each other numbers (because we gave them out on tinder) and I don’t know why or if it’s relevant to mention.

So since then, I learned a lot of things from my FC. It serves that she’s talented to hear things at work and to make her ways to info.

Basically, A and B are talking about me somehow? I’m kind of confused but from what I gathered B is open to "seducing" me but he’s letting A go his way because he’s more advanced on the path. Disgusting, right? I feel like a trophy or a goal. "Who’s gonna fuck her first?", right?

I also learned that A’s kind of thinking about an opening with me since a party from September, where I got trashed real bad so, what is that supposed to mean? I was wearing a sexy attire and I was out, like, OUT.

Also, it appears that at one of the Team Building’s party, I was kind of tired and drunk and I asked him to accompany me back to my room but then I switched to one of my coworker (who I’m friend with) and apparently, he was kind of upset because he had this plan to "catch me" on the way to my room. Red flag? I don’t know. I still don’t want to believe this shit. I hate myself right now because I’m so overthinking about A and I’m letting him take a toll on my life. I shouldn’t even be thinking about him.

I’m still trying to convince myself it’s all in my head but the lonely me doesn’t want that, she wants this to be true. The rational me is holding this thing and telling me to not hope for anything. What is there to hope anyway? He only wants to fuck me. Final point. That’s how I see it for several reasons.

One time we were talking about this girl he’s seeing and they fuck but she’s beginning to be attached. Being who I am I told him that it was better to let her go if he didn’t feel the same way. I then proceeded to ask him what was wrong with all these people who want to get labeled? This truly is what I think. I don’t like commitment and labels but I think he took it as a hint of being sex buddies, maybe because he, too, told me he just wanted to chill. I fucked up I guess.

Anyway, I can’t be your sex buddy because I’m a virgin. Yeah. I’m not seeking a meaningful relationship (though if I can have one it’d be cool). I don’t even know what I’m searching still. I just want to chill and spend time with a guy but not for sexual means. It’s complicated and I’m conscious it doesn’t make much sense. I’m not against it but as a virgin, it’s just complicated. And I don’t think a guy like him wants that so…

I’m already torturing myself with all this shit for nothing because nothing (good) will come out of that and the lonely me is already clinging to this shitstorm, while the rational me is screaming at the top of his lungs that this shit will get me down. I can feel it. I just know it. This smells bad.

This is fucked up. I didn’t ask for this. I never ask for it. It’s true. I never dearly searched. These past months I enrolled on tinder to pass time (truly) and that was me attempting something I guess but it never got far.

Shit’s always coming my way, I never pray for it to happen (well I do tend to hope for something to happen but not this way). Though I’m kind of happy something’s happening, I know it’ll end up badly and I’m already hurt to see this hurting me. It’ll leave scars for sure.

I ask for peace but I know peace is boring me out. At least it gives a little spice in my life but it also calls for suffering. Sigh.

Holy fuck.

I guess I like to suffer?

I’m pretty sure this post is written in terrible English but it’s all so mingled in my mind that there’s no way in hell that I can write this properly...

[turtlechicky]

Just something I need to rant about.

I have a very hard time trusting women and that’s thanks to my childhood. It’s not something I’m going to air out. A friend believes I may have ptsd thanks to my mom and growing up with her untreated ptsd. So where people call me fake is me just avoiding topics and not willing to talk about shit.

The friend who I could talk to about most things began to stop messaging me, when I’d message her she would only reply to me 3-5 times before going silent. It usually took an hour between the messages. Like I get it you have depression and a lot of health issues.. but all I was good for was being used. I stopped trying to start conversations and we went so long without talking. She got several tattoos in that time period but never had time to say hi to me. She kinda tried so I accepted and invited her to my apartment for a week because it seemed to be better. We had some heart to heart talks and it was okay for a few days and then it was apparent that I was more of a convenience then a friend. She never helped clean, she smoked my weed WHILE I WAS ASLEEP and ate so much of our food only to purge it all in my bathroom. I understand it’s an eating disorder and I understand she has a ton of problems that make coping really hard. But to tell me “I’m bigger than you now” in complete disgust and change the conversation when I tried to talk to you because I need to talk to someone. You slept while I was awake and you stayed up when I went to bed, no matter what I did it seemed like you wanted nothing to do with me just wanted to spend the week in my home. You left and changed your name and didn’t even try to talk to me for over a month. I gave up trying to talk to you, you showed me last year after everything that I wasn’t that important. “Best friend” because I was easy to use. I was honest with what I was feeling and thinking and you immediately turned it around as if I’m the one to blame for everything, that I’m the one with problems, that I’m a fake person because I couldn’t handle only being your “best friend” when I was useful to you. You actually tried to turn my friend against me and mocked your boyfriend for having an anxiety attack because you slept with your boss. I’m not the one who talks about slitting my wrists and playing with the cuts and drawing with the blood. When ever I wore pink or purple you went out of your way to tell me how much you hate the colours. You have gone out of your way to ignore me, even though I needed my “best friend”, but I’m the bad person because I didn’t have the energy for mind games and fake friends anymore. Not to forget whatever bullshit you are filling the exroommates head with because I compared the two of you and she went crazy.

Now the exroommate... she’s bipolar, but a more severe kind. She needed help and we needed a roommate. She was living with black mold in a horrible building with some fucked up people. She lived two doors down from a cocky dealer who brings all kind of issues (cough swat cough) and just crappy people in general. So we wanted to help her because she was an old friend of mine. Ditched the town we went to school at and stopped talking to me for a few years. Whatever didn’t matter. But she was obsessive over her cat. Told me I couldn’t call him nosey nibs because she didn’t like it, but her other friends can call him dickface and other insulting names and she loved calling him stupid. But nosey nibs was bad. I need help cleaning and do things because I’m crippled with health problems, that was the other reason she was brought in. Not just money but because she can clean. But nope! I did the cleaning, I did the work that needed to be done and was told to relax every time I complained. During her fits of anger I was the verbal punching bag or I watched the poor cat have to deal with her. She is beyond entitled, bf had a friend over for d&d and the friend said that everyone gets pizza. The boys got back from picking it up and she walked out and demanded to know where her pizza was because he said everyone gets one. When bf took me out for dinner or a date she would whine that she wanted some or that she was never taken out on a date. She would obsess over different topics and would go on and on about the same things that make her angry. Or when she was angry she always had to declare it as she treated anything and anyone like crap. Told me how she destroyed a bunch of her ex’s cloths and other stuff because he was a junkie player who only wanted easy pussy. Her dumbass got back with him and was specifically told he is not allowed here period. He’s a heavy drug user and we don’t want that here, she gave him the address and fucking had him pick her up at the patio. She decides to spend 2 weeks with him and left the cat in our care, without telling us and freaks out saying we need to replace the cat poop scoop because my bf broke it taking care of her stupid animal. She’s not allowed there anymore and starts asking to bring him here, which was met with a firm no. Which she did nothing but bitch and moan about how it’s not fair she can’t see him. He goes on vacation and starts to distance himself before she says wtf and blocks her after saying he doesn’t want to be with her. She actually harassed him hardcore when they broke up, walls of texts of her just not stopping and then none stop calling so she can scream at him.

She’s a hood rat, a grossly petty, genuine shit human all the way through. She trashed my home, believed we should just feed her and give her food when she didn’t have any left. Not my problem you don’t know how to spend the money the government gives you every month, not my problem that you end up hungry for a week or two due to your own stupidity. She sends a text that literally sounds like she was going to leave in a few weeks and then freaks out because we were confused over what she sent. She throws a temper tantrum and says “I’ll move out of there’s going to be issues” when she started the whole issue to begin with. I text her asking her not to burn white sage EVERYDAY (it was a week straight) because when I would get up to use the restroom all I could smell is burnt sage and it makes me feel ill. But that was immediately met with “I don’t burn it while your awake. Whatever I’ll just throw it out.” I tried to explain but she wouldn’t listen and I think she may have thrown it out in the end. I decided to have a nap on the couch and instead of leaving me alone she pestered me until I sat up and listened to the stupid shit I don’t care about that she HAS to tell me. She wouldn’t let me sleep and brought a friend over and laughed at me when I napped during a boring movie. But you know I leave her alone to nap but god forbid I receive that courtesy. I once again try and explain how rude it is to wake me up when I’m sleeping because you need to tell me about what some stupid person said and like clock work she freaks out and says she feels tense angry energy in the apartment because she’s an “empath” and I’m a literal fucking duck, quack. If she was an empath she was a shit one because every time she asked me if I was angry it was nothing more than a depressed state for the day. Yet my emotions how I felt never mattered, if I was upset that must mean I’m angry but even if I yelled she did nothing because “your always so calm and leave headed” and “you didn’t yell you never do” even though I did, I fucking ran and took a bath to calm down to make it a level conversion after I had yelled. She decided to “help” a “friend” (she had known him for maybe a week) and jumped head first into a drug deal and brought the crazy fucker to the apartment. She had only met him once. I was told to lock my windows and doors and be super quiet for the night. She was FUCKING WHITE GIRL WASTED and begged me not to tell my boyfriend. Decided she wanted to kill herself when I told her I had to tell him. Like hell im not going to tell him she may have put his life on the line. Then she wanted to tell my bf what happened after she “calmed down”. She had wanted him to come to her but he refused, he works nights. She knocked on our door FUCKING LIGHTLY until we got up and she barely told him anything, I told him more. She fucking lied to me about what happened 3 times and then tried to turn my bf against me saying I was being emotional. She decided to hop out for a few days, right after they “talked”, changed her number and got a new phone. But she wouldn’t stop texting me. I said I need a few days and she sent me 16 messages in 2 days. 2 on fb and the rest through text. The one she sent right before I went out to tell her we wanted her to move out was manipulation.

(I’m tech stupid so you get copy and paste of the text)

“I get your angry. I really do.

You need to try to understand that vodka makes me freak out I hate the stuff and I over reacted

Please try to ubderatdn it had NOTHING to do with me and nothing to do with you two.

I can continue to stay out of the apartment for how ever long you need. But I might have a job at a pet store that my friend works at and I need this job and I just need a plAce to stay. I would be angry too if the roles were reversed and if you really are my friend you are going to ubderatdn I made a mistake

I admit it And I am learning from it

Please don't send me on the street over almost nothing”

I finally broke and was straight to the point. I gave her until the 16th to get out and when she started to argue with me I threw the text she sent me in her face calling her the name of the other friend. She lost it and stole my ear muffs, a 10cent mug, a small bag of crystals and marbles I liked, and she decided that she was only going to pay 200 of the 490 she owed for rent. She insulted me endlessly and was gross, she kept throwing trash around the apartment more so after I kicked her out. Every time she came to pick up stuff she tried to get me to fight with her and scream back. But I never did, I got the landlord involved and wasn’t here alone when she came here. I made sure she couldn’t do more damage than what she did. And all the while texting my boyfriend telling him how bad of a person I am and that I was stupid for kicking her out over “almost nothing”. She tried to manipulate him and claims I over reacted and he should have said something.

Maybe I did. But I stand by my choice. Why would I want someone who claims to be my friend and treats me like trash? We said weed and muchrooms are the only recreational drugs aloud period. No if ands or buts about it. What happened changed every time she told me what happened. I’ve watched the way the heavy ones warp people and I want absolutely nothing to do with them. I watched the way blow warped a few people and I’ve watched what meth does to people. I know too many drug abusers and seen how they treat the people they love. So sorry if a very personal thing of mine was too hard to understand. But this “one mistake” wasn’t one, it was going to be another and another because that’s who she is. I ducked out of a relationship that was going to be abusive before it got there, why would I make an acception for you? I was dating the guy and found out he was crazy and cut it off before it went south, turns out he was a junkie. Something his cousin left out when she said we should get together. Bitch was supposed to be my best friend.

I have my problems but being toxic isn’t one of them. Just because I refuse to be bullied by people who use their disorders as an excuse to treat others like crap, doesn’t mean I should stay away from anyone with a mental illness, in fact many of my friends with mental illnesses have stated how much I help them. I’m not a toy or a puppet, I am human and your manipulative ghetto ass isn’t worth my time or energy. I refuse to be friends with someone who torments the cat until it paws at her and chases her in anger or will tease him with his favourite treat tuna and then never give him any after she makes him beg for it. I’m also not followed around Walmart for stealing or beg the neighbours to take me to a food bank because weed was more important than food. Or brag about stealing cough drops.

I have my flaws. I’m too forgiving, I can be very cold and cruel sometimes, I’m blunt and picky about how clean my apartment is. I’m not always good at talking about what bothers me and sometimes I clam up and hold onto it until I crack. I can be very cruel when I’ve been screwed over and my anger scares people. But I’m not fake, I am me and I’m not going to change or be manipulated by some bitter cunt who ignored me for the day when I told her of a complement I got and was confused by. Anytime I brought up how I thought people’s comments and stares were odd she’s always say the same thing “well you do walk around with braces on both legs and you dress how you want. I don’t understand why your confused or surprised.” But she just about lost it when I was cat called and didnt give a shit and then bragged about “cat calling men like they do to us.” I don’t hold grudges and sometimes I really question if it’s a good thing or not. I tried to help an old friend and she dug her grave. I will not be sorry for how I feel or what I said. Why is it okay to push me to a breaking point but god forbid I say anything apparently it makes me a hypocrite and immature?

[derkastellan]

Observations: Torment - Tides of Numenera #2

Well, honeymoon’s over. After taking a break during a two week vacation the game started to feel a bit like a drudge. I mean, gameplay is very clear now:

Go to a new location.

Talk to all named NPCs.

Do some quests.

Do the main quest.

Change of location.

From hereon, spoilers!

At first I welcome the idea of going into another person’s memory by the use of Mercasters. Seemed very interesting. The game sometimes makes you pay really hard for laying your hands on one. And by now I wonder why... 

You waste pool points on exploring it. 

If the Mercaster moves the story forward (like the one helping to find Mazzof) that’s okay...

In all other cases, the best you can get is some permanent pool upgrade.

The worst you can get is that your tides change. Yippie-ka-yay. Super-lame.

You can only visit them once. So you can at least sell them.

Some of them seem to offer no clear benefit.

Almost all of them make it unclear how it can have been constructed in the first place since the person involved is dead.

The promise of it being able to change the course of somebody’s past seems to be only true for Matkina and else is just talk.

It’s one of those gameplay features that seem cool and innovative and then turn out to be only a gimmick. I hate it when games promise one thing and do another.

So, I guess, all it does is give you more information on someone. Made into a gameplay element instead of a text. A little interaction required to make it more interesting than read all of that stuff out.

Then there is the thing about the Changing God trying to take you over. So, the Specter was him all the time. Then he suddenly disappears - to where? Then he kills a believer/prophet - how?

It was not a great twist. I kind of assumed you were the Changing God and forgot. The longer you think about the basic premise of the game you start to experience fridge logic - that it doesn’t make sense. 

Castoffs can’t die. 

And then they do, but never under circumstances quite clear. 

Why does the Changing God leave his undying bodies? Apparently to make a differently configured body. 

And how does he do it? 

Where does the new body come from? How is it constructed? 

And how does it never share the same danger the Changing God just was in?

The whole premise is a lot of weaker than the one from “Planescape: Torment”. Mind you, while I love that game, it also had a lot of limitations.

I also complained that T:ToN gives out combat rewards. In fact, it usually doesn’t. The start was apparently done by a different level designer who didn’t read the level design guidelines or something like that. I mean, both the Reef of Fallen... Stars (?) and the Anechoic (?) Lazaret have this “bug” that you get something like 25XP for peaceful resolution and 100XP for kicking ass, IIRC. Thank goodness this is not repeated in other locations.

By the way, a lot of the current frustration I feel with the game is that it consistently dies while I try to do the Anchorage quest. Every single time. I stopped playing until I get some feedback from the tech support. Thimbleweed Park is where it’s at now for me. ;)

Anyway, another observation I made: By default everybody in the Ninth World seems to live in a slum. Like the district with the falling houses in Sagus Cliffs. The people squatting in the memorial ruins (the Necropolis?). Everybody in the Bloom, really. Everybody is being bullied by street thugs or having some sort of blase or shrug-it-off or bitter personality really. Optimists seem like stupid dreamers. Everybody is haunted by their past. It starts to grate on my nerves, really. And almost everybody has a bone to pick with you because you’re either seen as the castoff remnant of an asshat god or because other castoffs barely behave better. You’re constantly playing cleaning staff either convincing people that you’re not as bad or you’re proving them right. It truly grates on me. There’s never a clear, new impression in the game (almost). It becomes especially evident when you have the “Scan Thoughts” power, really, because you read their reaction, and it’s almost always something hostile, paranoid, or suspicious. Why castoffs don’t commit suicide in a particle accelerator as soon as they wake up is anybody’s guess.

Now, T:ToN is leagues better than InXile’s “other remake” - Wasteland 2 was an unmitigated disaster of bad level design, bad game design, and bad everything. It started to drain my will of playing on within hours. Torment is much better. I would still play it had I not become so frustrated with its shortcomings... I mean, for the little visual candy it offers it half kills my aged computer. Gameplay is very predictable. At some point you don’t even read the walls of text anymore, given that this game has more text than any text adventure out there. And unlike Planescape: Torment, development of intra-party story is as slow as a glacier. 

But at least it’s more fair. You are not punished by the engine for your original character build decisions by closing whole areas of the game off. In fact, by spending mental pool points most things in the game stay accessible. Making, btw, the nano with high intellect edge the best build in the game, auto-succeeding all over the place. But that was a choice I understood (and made) within two hours of starting my first game. So, fair enough.

The value of sneaking is lost on me in this game. Maybe it’s just me. There seem to be a lot of half-baked ideas in the game, and it cannot be for having to rush the game. Maybe too many ideas still to properly execute them? Or maybe, in spite of some big ticket names, not enough experienced talent to execute on the ideas?

Torment: Tides of Numenera is okay. It surpasses many other games. But it gets repetitive, the story seems to drag on, and I am getting disenchanted with it. Maybe less sidequests? Hard pill to swallow for old optimizer me. I wanted to savor every bit out of it, but it’s too much the same, too many meaningless forays into Meres, too much text, and too little “WTF do I care about this?” Why am I playing endlessly goody-two-shoes for my ancestor’s sins? Some lesson about karma? If so, poorly done. The game lacks variety. It made some great locations but that’s it. The world in Torment felt deeper with all its factions and the enormous background the D&D stuff built before there ever was a PC game. This time... the thread tying it all together is too tight. I’m getting tired of epic plots where you are the center of the world anyway.

I guess I’m still pissed. Oh well.