#and more than anything i need CLOSURE between these two NOW or im going to EXPLODE
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n0vazsq · 7 months ago
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Enough for now | Hector Fort x Reader
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pairing . . . hector fort x gf!reader
summary . . . After a fight between you and Hector, he gets the silent treatment
request . . . yes!! based on this request!
word count . . . 1.1k+
warnings . . . angsttttttt!
faceclaim . . . N/A
alexavia yaps . . . wrote this in a rush bc im watching the f1/f2 qatar sprint race but i hope yall like it!!
taglist . . . @barcapix ,, @f1lover55 (lmk if you want to join the taglist!)
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. . . Hector had been distant for days now, his silence heavy in the space between you both. It wasn’t the kind of quiet that brought peace. It was suffocating, the kind of silence that left you questioning everything.
You had tried, tried to reach out, to comfort him, but every attempt felt like you were talking to a wall. Each message, each question left unanswered. He refused to open up, and you were left standing there, not knowing where you stood.
It all started with an argument. The first time you really snapped at each other. You had asked him what was wrong, tried to break through the walls he’d been building around himself. But instead of letting you in, he had pushed you away.
"Why can’t you just leave me alone?" he’d shouted, his voice laced with frustration. "I don’t need you hovering around me, okay? I don’t need anyone."
You stood frozen in place, the words stinging like a slap. All you wanted was to help. All you ever wanted was to be there for him, but somewhere along the way, it seemed you’d become a distraction. The hurt was almost unbearable, but you didn’t say anything back. You just stood there, silent, trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill.
The silence that followed the argument stretched on for days. You didn’t speak to him, and he didn’t speak to you. Each day felt longer than the last. It was as if the space between you was growing, widening like a gap that neither of you knew how to bridge.
You tried to give him space, to let him deal with whatever was bothering him. But it felt like you were suffocating in your own apartment, walking on glass every time you moved.
It wasn’t until the fourth day of complete silence that you realized something. Hector was stubborn, always had been. But it wasn’t just his ego keeping him silent. There was something more. Something in his eyes that you couldn’t quite figure out. Something that felt like regret, but too egotistical to show it.
You sat by your phone, your thumb hovering over his name in the contact list. You wanted to text him, to ask if he was okay, to break the silence. But each time you tried, you stopped yourself. Was it really okay to keep chasing someone who had made it clear they needed space?
You wanted him to come to you, to speak, to show that he cared. You wanted to feel like you mattered enough for him to break the silence.
But he didn’t.
Days turned into a week. You stopped looking for messages that weren’t coming, stopped hoping for an apology that seemed more distant with each passing day. It hurt to admit it, but the silence was beginning to take its toll. You had stopped reaching out, letting the walls between you both build higher and higher.
The world outside felt like it was moving on while you stayed stuck in this state, unable to move forward. And yet, you knew you couldn’t go on like this. Something had to give. You needed closure, or you needed a way to fix this, to make it better.
But when he finally walked through the door after a long week, your heart froze.
His eyes were tired, his posture hunched as if the weight of his own guilt was pressing down on him. Hector opened his mouth to speak, but no words came.
You stood across from each other, the distance between you two more suffocating than ever. You knew what he wanted to say, but you also knew how hard it would be for him to say it.
"I didn’t mean to hurt you," he whispered, his voice raw, like the words had been trapped in his throat for days. "I was… I was just angry. I didn’t know how to handle everything, and I lashed out. I’m sorry. Just please, talk to me. I miss you."
The apology hung in the air, floating between you both, but it wasn’t enough. Not yet.
You looked at him, the ache in your chest threatening to destory the walls you’d built to protect yourself. The anger you’d felt before had faded, but the hurt was still there. The silence was still there, pressing down on you both, paining like you were pressing on a bruise.
You hesistated, not wanting to speak. But seeing the pleading look on Hector's eyes, the way he fidgeted with his hands, made you finally break.
"You shouldn’t have said that." you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. "I wanted to help you. I tried, Hector. But you just… pushed me away."
He stepped forward, slowly, as if afraid you might pull away. He reached for your hand, but you didn’t pull back. His touch was hesitant, unsure, like he was still afraid of making things worse.
"I don’t want to lose you," he said softly, his voice strained. "I didn’t mean it. I just… I don’t know how to deal with everything sometimes."
You stared at him, feeling the weight of the words, feeling the shift in the air. You hadn’t realized how much you’d missed him until now. The silence had stretched on for so long that you’d almost convinced yourself you didn’t care anymore. But you did. You always had.
"I don’t want to lose you, either," you whispered back, the words heavy with everything you couldn’t say.
For a moment, neither of you moved. It felt like the world was holding its breath, waiting for the next step. You didn’t know if you could just forgive him like that. But you also knew that there was no way to move forward without trying.
The distance between you two felt smaller now, but there was still a part of you that wasn’t sure. You weren’t sure whether this would be the beginning of healing or if the walls were still too high. But as Hector's hand rested against yours, you realized that the first step had been taken.
And that was enough. For now.
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songbirdseung · 1 month ago
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ur writing is amazing omg im luv ! I just read the aisle that never was 💔💔 thank u for this masterpiece i NEED to know more plz ! If u could write a pt 2 however u like i need closure sob 😭
staaaaph! that made my day and it just started. well, yes of course, here's a part two, sweet pea.
𝑻𝑯𝑬  𝑨𝑰𝑺𝑳𝑬  𝑻𝑯𝑨𝑻  𝑵𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹  𝑾𝑨𝑺  (2) It was built slowly. Carefully. A warmth born not from rescue, but from the quiet understanding of two people who knew what it meant to be left behind and chose to stay anyway.
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It’s been months now. Nearing a year since that tragic day.
Did he ever try to contact you? Offer you a reason, any reason for why he left? Why he disappeared without so much as a glance back, not even the decency to let you walk down the aisle and hear the words that should’ve been said to your face?
No.
Not once did he show up. Not once did he explain himself.
And strangely, you were... okay with that.
Why?
Because someone else came along. Quietly. Without expectations. Without promises wrapped in pretty words. He came and sat beside you on a bench in the park when your world fell apart, and somehow, he never left.
Whoever’s up there, whatever higher power you choose to believe in might’ve taken away a lover, but they gave you something better in return.
A best friend who became a safe place. A safe place who slowly became everything.
Now, here you are, nearly a year later, sitting on his couch, wearing his T-shirt, eating his last pint of ice cream, watching a drama on his laptop like you’ve lived there all your life.
Jake walks in from the kitchen, half-scolding, half-smirking. “You’re eating my last ice cream.”
You glance at him, spoon in your mouth, legs curled beneath you. “You said to make myself at home.”
“Yeah, well, most people don’t take that literally and actually stay shy about it.”
“I have no reason to be shy around you.”
He pauses, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. “Yeah? Why’s that?”
You look at him, the corners of your mouth lifting into a small, knowing smile. “Because you’ve already seen me at my lowest. You’ve carried me through worse. If I can ugly-cry in front of you in a wedding dress with snot down my chin, I can eat your overpriced gelato.”
Jake snorts, walking over and flopping beside you. “You’re never gonna let me live that day down, are you?”
“Not a chance.”
He reaches out lazily, trying to steal the ice cream container from your hands, but you hold it out of reach. “Nuh uh. You surrendered this the moment you said ‘mi casa es su casa.’ That was your first mistake.”
“You’re such a menace.”
“I learned from the best.”
He leans back, eyes scanning your face for a second longer than they need to. “It’s weird.”
“What is?”
“How easy this feels.”
Your heart skips.
You want to ask what he means. But you already know. Because you feel it too.
The ease. The peace. The lack of pressure to perform or pretend. The way the silence between you two never feels empty, just comfortable.
“I know,” you whisper.
He doesn’t push. Doesn’t define anything. Just shifts closer, until your shoulders are touching and the warmth of him bleeds into your skin like second nature.
“I’m glad you’re still here,” you murmur after a beat.
Jake looks at you again, softer now. “I’m not going anywhere.”
And somehow, that one sentence feels more real than all the vows you never got to hear.
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The episode continues playing on Jake’s laptop, but neither of you are really watching it anymore. The ice cream sits between you, half-melted and long forgotten. What fills the room isn’t silence, but something quieter, heavier. Like the air knows things are shifting before either of you will admit it.
Your shoulder’s still pressed against his. His thigh brushes yours every time he shifts slightly. It’s not new. But tonight… you feel it differently.
You glance at him, stealing a look. He’s focused on the screen, one hand resting behind his head, the other tapping lightly against his stomach to some rhythm in his head. His lashes are stupidly long. He’s always been handsome but not the type that made your heart stop.
Until recently.
Now it skips. Stumbles. Starts again.
You feel it when he passes you the remote without looking. When he lets you steal his food but swats your hand away from his phone. When he knows exactly how much milk you take in your coffee and makes it without asking.
You don’t remember when the butterflies started. Maybe it was the night he brought your favorite takeout and played that dumb old movie you once mentioned loving in passing. Or maybe it was when you came over in tears two months ago, and he didn’t say anything, just wrapped his arms around you like you were something worth protecting.
“Hey,” Jake says suddenly, his voice a little lower than before, pulling you back.
You look at him. “Yeah?”
He nods at the screen. “You’re not even watching. You’ve had the same expression for ten minutes. What’s going on in that brain of yours?”
You smile, barely. “Just thinking.”
“Dangerous.”
You nudge him with your shoulder. “You’d know.”
Jake shifts to face you more fully now, one leg tucked under him. “Seriously. You okay?”
“I’m… weirdly good,” you admit. “Like I shouldn’t be, but I am.”
“That’s not weird,” he says. “It means you’re healing.”
You stare at him. “Yeah. Maybe you’re right.”
He grins, but it fades as he keeps looking at you, longer than usual. His expression softens, and he tilts his head slightly, like he’s studying you. Not in a way that makes you uncomfortable. Just in that Jake way. Quiet, observant, thoughtful.
“What?” you ask.
He hesitates. “You just… look like you again.”
That lands with more weight than you expect. Your breath catches for a second.
“Thanks to you,” you say quietly.
He doesn’t look away. “Nah. You did that on your own. I just stuck around long enough to see it happen.”
Something about the way he says that makes your chest tighten.
And then there’s a moment.
It’s not loud. It doesn’t announce itself. It just… is.
You’re both quiet. Eyes lingering. His hand inches just a little closer on the cushion. Yours doesn’t move away.
Your pulse flutters.
So does his.
But neither of you make the move.
Not yet.
Instead, you lean your head gently against his shoulder, and Jake exhales like he’s been holding that breath the whole time.
You feel his hand slowly shift until his fingers brush yours. He doesn’t take your hand, not all the way. Just enough to let it be known:
I’m here.I’ve been here.I’m not going anywhere.
And with your heart resting quietly in that space between friendship and something more, you smile to yourself.
Because for the first time in what feels like forever, you're not looking backward.
You're starting to look at him.
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thesrctsoftheuniverse · 10 months ago
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so over the weekend (literally two days) i watched 16 of the 18 episodes of season 3....... so here's my thoughts!!!!
i've already professed my love for the characters more than enough but i just need to remind everyone that i am sosososo in love with all these fucking characters, what a truly insanely likeable lineup of different personalities
eddie getting buck to babysit chris so he stops being stuck in a depressive spiral.... genius
the earthquake episodes last season were insane, but the tsunami disaster?????? off the charts. the scenes with buck and chris were fucking beautiful, i love this duo and need more of them NOW. buck cares about that kid so goddamn much. and while tired and injured he saves idk how many more people. the way him and chris are fighting for their lives and then buck is desperately looking for chris all while eddie thinks they're completely safe. eddie was freaking out last season because his son was stuck in a school, but he was calm during this disaster because he was with BUCK. it makes me so emotional. im sosososo glad that i had seen the outcome of chris being found before watching the episode bc idk how people who didnt know that beforehand could handle it. the scene with eddie finding buck with chris' glasses???? im going to start crying. and after all of that for buck being so sure eddie wouldnt trust him anymore only for him to drop off chris again like its nothing?? im going to sob
from what i have read online the lawsuit storyline is a very divisive topic in the fandom. i kind of see both sides. i can see that buck thought his hands were tied and that the only family he had was replacing him. but i know at the same time that it's an overreaction. bobby didnt have any reason to have buck stay on leave for that long when chimney proudly proclaims he went back to work after only a couple of weeks. i understand that bobby cares about buck like a son somewhat, but he was not being fair. buck also shows that he didn't really want to cause as much hurt and friction between them by apologising again and again and not even thinking about accepting the money, going back to the 118 even though he knew they were going to make it difficult for him. it was a tricky situation, but im glad they moved on from it fairly quickly.
the fight club eddie storyline is kind of wild????? also did he ever get any reporcussions from bobby for that??? men will literally do anything but talk about their issues and deal with their feelings. what an insanely gay thing to do.
love eddies conversation with bobby where he starts crying. eddie should cry more often (i say this with love)
lena im in love with you, do you like women?
chris' english teacher is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo beautiful
i truly love seeing athena and her family grow and change over time. the relationship between bobby and michael is so important to me. i love them together. and michael's tumor storyline??? heartbreaking.
love albert!
chimney and maddie i love you two soso much you deserve the world, youre so imporant to me. chimney respecting maddies boundaries no matter what.... im gonna cry (A BABY?????????)
the episode of 911 dispatch being taken over might just be one of the best episodes of the series. i especially loved that we got to see characters that other times didnt get as much screentime. LOVE LOVE LOVE JOSH!!!
the athena begins episode is heartbreaking. and beautiful. the closure at the end, with her telling emmet's mother that they made an arrest. how beautiful. really well done. she never gave up on finding that man.
the eddie begins episode is also beautiful. him cutting the fucking rope???? idk how they want me to believe that he swam to safety but whatever..... anyways he loves chris so much and we got to see more of his and shannon's marriage which i loved. to be fair, he was kind of a shitty father and definitely a shitty husband, shannon was clearly not ok and i understand why she left. doesnt make it right, but i understand it. when he gets stuck underground and buck starts losing his mind, screaming, crying, throwing up and bobby gives him /that/ look. oh kill me now. that man was gonna dig by hand .... i love them.
the episode of buck helping that old veteran feel important and not alone at the end of his life? im going to start crying again. buck truly believes that no one will ever love him or choose him or stay with him forever.
michael talking to harry about what being black means when they encounter police was incredibly moving and heartbreaking. but also important. i just love athena's family.
hen hitting that cello girl with the ambulance...... oh i cried so hard, my heart broke for her. karen and her are so amazing together i love them so much, they truly are each other's rock.
i love the buckley siblings. i love the side characters. i love the main characters. i have so many thoughts.
abby....i understand that she had to get away from everything to find herself ok? but she shoudlve just texted or sent a letter to buck just to give him closure and not let him keep haunting her apartment. i dont like them as a couple, this shit has clearly hurt buck deeply and will not be easy for him to get over. she didnt really seem all to apologetic either at the end. i get it but also why did u have to hurt buck by not ever responding and ghosting him????
got so many funny and beautiful scenes this season, it was amazing!!! truly loved every character. it had that gay ass buddie kitchen scene... lol
but anyways....im already done with two episdoes of season 4 so bye
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rocicrew · 8 months ago
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clarissa mao !!
send me a character and i’ll list
favorite thing about them
she's the definition of poor little meow meow. i love her complexities and flaws. she's a rich spoiled heiress, she has enormous family issues. she tried to kill the family she would die for. redemption arcs in my opinion are not always well written but clarissa's does it for me.
she doesn't shy away from the fact that she has done terrible things for selfish reasons (when you look at it in the grand scheme of things). and while the way her father treated her explains her motivations, they are not excused by it. it is her who decides the person she was is gone, and she's going to spend her second chance making up for the things she'd done. it's honest and raw, and her arc shows that people do improve and change when they receive external support and build meaningful relations. while at the same time it says, some things cannot be amended. you can never bring someone back, but you can try to be good.
she is the subversion of the redemption achieved by one last good Deed or Sacrifice. by the time that happens, she's made peace with herself, with the consequences of her actions and it is a choice for the people she loves while she stops delaying the unavoidable.
least favorite thing about them
i find the lack of not revisiting her complicated relationship with julie a Crime. what do you mean after fighting alongside and joining the crew that found her sister, she would not understand her sister's motivation or want some closure re her death?
(tv wise: girl you Have the worst timing in s6. holden is falling asleep on the railing and you think ah a great time to revisit the horrible acts i did to kill him)
(additional sidenote: nothing more meaningful comes to mind at the moment, at least not something i can articulate well so...)
favorite line
Which meant Naomi had misunderstood. Clarissa had meant, I'm not afraid.
10000000/10 on the pain scale this line continues to haunt me. what an epilogue for her im-
(also her exchange with erich on the shuttle about letting people in their tribes without demanding that they prove they need them, and ending it with her prison sentence,,,,,,,,,, i'm rolling on the floor each time)
brOTP
is there any other answer between clarissa and amos ? i personally cannot see their relations as anything other than platonic with deep devotion. they saw each other's worst parts and decided there's good in there even if they can't quite see it in their own selves at times.
they're mirrors but also kind of foils at the same time ?? amos is never afraid while clarissa is all the time,,, let's not be monsters together,, i want to be there in your last moments,,, ah yeahh
OTP
i do not truly ship her with anyone. i can speculate about romantic dynamics, but it's not super far in the Shipping category. i do think she and bobbie would make out in the roci tho
nOTP
is kind of answered in the previous two ? i do not see her and amos' relationship being romantic (except maybe in the roci polycule kind of thing, which i'm still more drawn to the idea of her and bobbie or a complicated relationship with naomi)
random headcanon
i'm not sure how random it is, because it is a nickname she has in canon. but i personally hc that the roci crew over time begins to call her claire after babylon's ashes. peaches is primarily amos' nickname for her and it feels a step too far to use it. so claire is still a way to signal her new path.
i also believe she's a lesbian tbh
unpopular opinion
i have not seen too many opinions on her. i know a lot of people were put off of her in s3, (i have to say she grew on me later as well) but i can now say that she was Unhinged (in a compliment way)
also i think that there's a tendency for her to be portrayed a bit meek in the time after she's joined the roci crew which is the last way i'd personally describe her. she's quiet and reserved, yes, insecure about her place in that family, but she's also blunt and takes risks and has been shown to be incredibly intelligent and capable. and i think it takes away from her character with all her flaws.
song i associate with them
nothing comes to mind rn, i am also terrible at this kind of associations. always one or two lyrics throw me off.
favorite picture of them
the scene she's introduced, first up close and then the shot of her from behind with the navigation map of the maintenance shutte does thinks to the gifmaker side of me (if only the lighting wasn't so yellow)
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8n53 · 2 years ago
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im thinking about the blackquill investigations game post (as i do) and could you imagine. phantom adopting brand new personas on the fly whenever the situation calls for it and blackquill trying to keep up and play along. phantom being deadpan a lot of the time but occasionally throwing out little jokes and sarcastic jabs that blackquill cant help but smirk at. blackquill watching phantom slowly develop likes and dislikes and opinions and thinking to himself about how this is the same person who not too long ago called themselves an "endless abyss". help
#aa5 spoilers #ace attorney spoilers // that post is SO dangerous for me because im not allowed to want phantom and simon to have a relationship that isnt complete animosity its not right theyre crimes are too reprehensible but my animal brain doesnt care i want. i dont even know what i want between them but the idea of them working together and phantom discovering themselves and feeling FEELINGS and having to deal with it is a siren call its dangerous i cant entertain the thought i cant(im entertaining it im entertaining it so much)
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faithlesbian · 2 years ago
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how do we feel about t4t bangel ?
oh my god that's spooky i was literally just thinking about what it would look like for them both to talk about their bisexuality after that s3 dyke (proverbial) post!! let these two discuss their queer experiences night apparently
i'm assuming u mean trans girl buffy right? love that reading. i've gotta say, similar to the t4t spangel ask (im assuming ur the same anon), i'm not a "shipper" in the traditional sense and specifically in this instance part of my love for their dynamic is Really feeling glad they don't end up together. my opinions on them in general probably deserve their own post, so i'll just summarise and say my favourite iteration of their relationship is friendly exes who can go to eachother for help, specifically stuff like angel showing up after joyce's funeral and the offscreen reunion after her resurrection in s6. like. these people care about eachother!!! and they want to make life easier for eachother!! specifically i love it when buffy can lean on angel for support if she needs to despite their lives being fairly seperate, bc good god does she need that.
so assuming obviously that buffy would be living as a girl from the get go in this version, you could build a starting over as herself element into her moving to a new town and new school in the pilot. you could play with the supernatural-as-queerness subtext from the show and have the understanding of her slayer identity between her and angel that she doesn't feel from her normal friends extend to her being out to him before she's out to the scoobies, which could then extend further into the s2 angelus arc with the threat of him outing her, and potentially that being how the scoobies find out if you really want narrative cohesion with canon (or if you want to be nice to buffy then. literally anything else happening)
going with my established Trans Angel Reading, he'd only figure things out himself long after their relationship is over, and i think that could honestly be such a fucking Moment for them both, for him to confide this in her now after they've reached an understanding as she did in him right back at the start before everything went wrong. bittersweet but also kind of promising, like if it's possible to learn something new about yourself after 250 years then there's definitely still ways for their relationship to grow even if they cant be together. i feel like just as angel was able to help buffy navigate the world of the supernatural initially, she could help him navigate gender in the 21st century, and i think getting that understanding from her would be really important to him in a totally different way to getting it from the ats gang.
i think for buffy it could be a kind of closure for, once again, just how badly their relationship went to know that despite everything she was understood by the first person she loved, more than she even knew at the time. however, a beloved Buffy Trait of mine is how badly she reacts to people she sees as threatening to replace her in any way (see homecoming and kendra and faith's respective first episodes) so alternately you could get the much funnier response of hello?? that was my thing first?? how dare you?? which synchronises really well with the previous ask and the possibility for coming out to put an end to angel and spike's rivalry - it starts a whole new one with buffy!
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selamat-linting · 2 years ago
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there was a few things i missed and got wrong on my homestuck liveblog yesterday. first of all, i mistook terezi with kanaya with that morallegiance chat with vriska. makes sense, they used to be roleplay buddies until that mess of an incident. not taking away vriska's responsibility from that clusterfuck but, wonder how much of it is doc scratch influence. good god girl, why are you gambling with a literal god? also WHY rose is trusting that white ball asshole? i dont like him at all. he's basically responsible to a lot of the mess the trolls and beta kids is going through.
anyway, at the last page i left off, terezi and vriska's attitude towards each other is largely shown in the boy-off with dave and john. with karkat screaming in the background (he always screams in the background). so its easy to miss that theyre very much in a weird complicated, frenemy state with each other. that in between space where you're not sure if theyre genuinely fucking hates each other or theyre ribbing on each other like two meanspirited friends do. i've been there sister, i've been there.
speaking of vriska (again, because she is my child who has every disease), oh her relationship/friendship with tavros is very conflicted and, i dare say, delicious? this is something that im sure would hit even harder if tavros wasnt relegated to the butt of ableist jokes more than he's treated as a character but. trust me. imagine youre tavros. your friend(?) is vriska. she crippled you, she saved your life, she berates you at every turn, she kissed you. deep down she only wants best for you. she wanted you to kill her. she wanted you to hate her enough to do it. she doesnt want to bleed to death alone. she's begging you to kill her. she's could have forced you to do it but she doesnt. because this is for you both to grow stronger and survive. thats all she wanted all along. for you both to thrive in a world that eats you alive. she needs you to kill her. oh god *head in hands*
-so its really really sad to see vriska being so lonely after killing tavros. she dug a hole too deep to get out alone and the remaining friends she had that could have accepted her again are all dead or too burned out of her. i wish they both can meet each other again. just to talk and find closure. like, tavros deserves to be angry with vriska and he deserves to have that peace he always wanted from her. and vriska deserves to start being a better person and getting some peace of mind. she deserves a chance, is all im saying. like, its okay if tavros cant give it to her. but some of her friends could. maybe terezi? the worst they ever do to each other in terms of direct harm is the eye injury. or maybe karkat? oh god i dont want to hear them arguing, i would go deaf!
-at least vriska has john! its nice to see them being friends with each other. Tbh john has been a breath of fresh air (hehe) in all the doom and gloom. im not looking forward to him meeting his dead dad but right now, my boy is walking around the village with one of the finest music i heard so far. and then he drive a flying car with WV. its just, he is so positive and amidst a set of characters who lost all of their innocence, he remains as the one guy who tries to enjoy the game and take everything in stride. he felt smug when the salamanders keep referencing in his title, he bought everyone hats and snacks, he gave moral support to vriska. the harley and egbert family is so positive about everything and its so endearing!
-AND JADE! fuck yeah she's starting to show how awesome she is. YES JADE say fuck you to karkat! its been long overdue!!! she also should say fuck you to vriska too as a treat. and fuck you to tavros too. and fuck you to that prince of hope (more like doom lol) who blew up her computer. she deserve monetary compensation to deal with that troll polycruel.
-special mention to dave btw. i dont remember him doing anything particularly exciting lately but i believe he's the one carrying the team. john and jade had to do their quest to be effective in defeating the english demon guy (the brits are all demons lol) and rose had to be their prime researcher and strategist, so he basically did the save everyone's ass part. i cant wait to see him hang out with terezi. Also is it bad of me to want him go godtier? Like, it would be interesting.
-and other time aspect characters i want to appreciate, aradia! babygirl have finally get rid of her hopelessness and come back to life! and now she's bringing the gang back together!!! and putting the pieces on why gamzee suddenly breaks. too bad gamzee never had a chance to show his personality. anyway, im starting to think i was wrong about lil cal. like, i think it was posessed but oh no its just bro moving him around, but somehow that fucking puppet is the one wrapped up in literally everything. aradia finds that shitty doll and somehow its connected to gamzee losing it and the game sgurb and doc scratch and... whats going on????
-in conclusion, timebound kids are always the one carrying the team. they are hard to find but theyre the one who could determine how you win or lose the game.
-but how can i forget? kanaya! she came through. i really thought she was dead! but she is alive, and she kills people with a chainsaw than apply lipstick to her bloodstreak lips. she is trying so hard to be Hinged. final girl behavior fr. i wonder how she's going to meet rose again. i hope she talked rose out of that suicide mission.
-and can we talk about karkat? man, imagine leading an army of kids who did kill and maim each other before the game even starts. imagine being the lowest of the social hierarchy and trying to make the most toxic friendgroup filled with racists and murderers to listen to you. imagine being able to do that despite all the odds, bring them to victory, and have the price right on your hands only for it to be ripped away and your friends devolve into chaos and murder several hours later. its a failure of untold magnitude. no wonder he's so disturbed and angry at himself and everyone.
-okay now that im done with the characters. i want to compliment how good everyone looks. the art and the fashions are all sooo amazing. the talksprite is also wonderful. im inclined to change my pfp into feferi's talksprite because i like her design so much. also because hooray! She's just dead, not corrupted by horrorterrors. in my mind she is laughing at tavros and doomed dave rap battle while surrounded by beautiful scenery
-also, i cant believe infinite stairs are referenced AGAIN with sollux and karkat. and SMUPPET ASS JOKE? on tavros dead body? lmao. okay i need to see smuppet ass on dave again. he was just so funny with it. and karkat shipping craze with jadesprite and jade. the jokes are really good, fr
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safetyrat · 4 years ago
Note
Hiiii maybe LL!Ren for the character headcannon thing?
hey!! yes!! im really glad i get to talk abt ren bc he lives in my head rent free At All Times :) ty very much for requesting him
Realistic: While Ren did want to win, i mean thats kind of the whole point of the game, he never was truly passionate about it? Like, he saw how it was a hollow victory last season and being a natural two lifer, he didn't see his chances as too great. The driving force for making alliances and gearing up was mostly survival instinct. He would try, of course, but he woudn't go as far as betraying allies or doing anything else crazy like that, this game wasn't worth it.
Well, he used to think so. But BigB saying that if they win, a part of his queen wins with them? That stuck with him, for some reason. He is willing to go far futher, now. A far lot futher.
He needs to win, after all.
Funny: He still is very much a werewolf, but he does not transform on full moons (bc server power supression, regulation to make the game more fair etc. etc. whatever, he just naturally is a bit dogboy anyways). Instead, he just kinda,, goes crazy goes stupid? think this post without the transforming basically.
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It is especially incredibly inconvinient as this is Very Likely To Happen during the mysterious and very important meetings with Martyn/the Shadows. Sometimes this just makes him get into their weeb roleplay even more, more likely than not it ends up with furniture being nibbled on and everybody else incredibly tired with how much affection he demands. Usually Martyn has to console him bc he is very embarrassed afterwards. This is a routine they have developed in Dogwards. They Are Used To This.
(And yes, this is the reason he set himself on fire and we didnt see it in his episode. Fuck You if that wasnt even a full moon. It's also why Martyn insists on teaming with him afterwards, he clearly needs somebody)
Sad: He made a grave for his queen. Well, not a grave grave, her body is with the Joel and the other reds, and Ren doesn't think he even has half the claim to it as they do, but as close to closure as he could get. He gathered every trinked and item he could find that felt connected to her (I headcanon time to be much slower for them, so the recordings take a few days and there are days of down time between the recordings. You would be suprised how much Stuff piles up when you live with somebody for a few weeks) and burried it in the ashes of the fairy fort. Despite everything that happens late game, he always makes sure to go there and take care of it a bit, restore parts of the fairy fort maybe. He feels a bit silly, doing so in a death game, but he feels like its part of his duty to her. Like he owes it for not being able to protect her.
Canon who: OK SO this isnt entirely original, but!!!! do u know the post thats like "3rd life happend in a millisecond on the hermitcraft server, and when everybody returned they werent even sure it actually happend? and ren didnt even know if martyn actually exists?"
PLEASE if somebody knows where to find that post send it to me, its a banger and i wanna credit it properly
So take this and extend it to Last Life. Imagine Ren waking up after being killed, having watched first Lizzie, then BigB, then Martyn die, die, die. Imagine him opening his eyes in a panic, ready to scream for help from his allies, only to see... Doc? Looking concerned at him? Asking "Are you alright, man? You blanked out for a second there."
He is in a meeting. Doc looks expectantly at him to explain the new developments of the octagon. His whole life has just changed.
But it has been just a second. And every other second that passes, his memory gets more blurry. Did he really imagine that? Was he going crazy? Did he make them up? Make up three whole new people important to him? After all, most of the other players in that game had been hermits, except the ones closest to him, for some reason.
But no matter how much time passed, he could clearly remember their faces, and you know how they say that you can't make a new face up in a dream? He hung onto that.
Weeks later, and he doesn't remember why, but he metioned it to Pearl. And she told him about a little server she was on once called Evo, and that she had known Martyn and BigB there. She admits not knowing where they are now, but it is enough to make Ren determined to find them.
She also mentions another server, one she still frequents today, and while it doesn't usually have visitors, she promises to arrange something.
Time passes again, then Ren finds both Gem and Pearl at his front door and they take him on a journey to a world of empires.
It's where he gets to see his queen again, and this time, she is more royal then she has ever been before.
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cuddlesslut · 4 years ago
Text
Beginnings
Chapter Ten of Home
Atsumu x fem reader, Suna x fem reader, Hinata x fem reader
Summary: a glance back
Warnings: some NSFW elements in this chapter
AN / so it looks like the chapters are going to be shorter than before but that’s just because I can only keep my energy up for so long. I really do enjoy writing but it’s easier for me to write smaller chapters rather than like before. Also I know Suna hasn’t been as present I promise we will be getting more of him soon! UNEDITED SORRY
Part Nine: Closure
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You collapsed onto your bed immediately after getting home from lunch with Atsumu and you haven’t moved for at least half an hour. Emotionally you were exhausted. Seeing him and thinking about him still caused a pang in your chest but that reunion was needed. You needed to start moving past him, that much you decided. He was your first love and he wounded you in a way that may never fully heal but now there’s two amazing guys trying to help you move forward.
You let a long grown rubbing your hands over your face. This were complicated enough when you were still coming to terms with your felling with Hinata. God he must be wondering what the hell is going with you leaving with his teammate. Maybe Bokuto and Sakusa have already started filling in the blanks for him. You could see those idiots snickering to themselves when you had encountered the group earlier. A soft smile graced your lips thinking of those two. You missed those two, and their constant bickering. You had become close to the the team over the years. Having hosted several victory parties at your and Atsumu’s shared home.
A small tear slipped down your cheek running down your face as you lay staring at the ceiling. Just another thing you had lost because of the setter. You released the breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. Shaking that thought from your mind it did no good to dwell on those things now. Thinking back to your favorite orange haired man you felt slightly nervous about having to explain everything to him. Sho is nowhere near as dumb as most think ,yes he tends to get a little over excited missing some details but he’s really quite clever, so he’s probably figured out most things. It’s not like he wasn’t aware of your past you had spilled that too him a lot quicker than you had planned. You can remember that moment clearly. It was the moment your feelings for Hinata had first started becoming deeper than you had intended, even though you denied them for a lot longer.
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You stretched sitting up the soft cotton sheets falling your lap as you yawned searching searching the room for the familiar sight of Shoyo’s bright orange hair. You rose your brow at the lack of his presence. The small apartment was silent. Which made you draw the conclusion that he was not here, he’s to rambunctious to be home and not make any noise not that you minded. You had a clue where he could probably be and your suspicions were confirmed as you heard him enter through the front door. It surprised you the first morning it had happened but by now you are used to Hinata going for morning runs.
He stood in the door smile spreading across his face upon seeing you awake in this bed wearing only one of his old game shirts from Brazil. Your hair still a mess and the purple marks he left last night peaking out from the collar of the crew neck. It was certainly an amazing sight for him to come back to. He leaned against the door frame lifting the hem of his shirt to wipe some sweat from his face. Now it was your turn to appreciate the view. His abs and delicious v coming into sight. Grazing your eyes down to his workout shorts that fit nice and snug against his defined thighs. God his thighs were a blessing in and of themselves. After your quick glance you look back up to the eyes of the man in front of you.
“You know I’ll never understand how you can have the energy to go running in the morning after the nights we have,” you chuckle.
A wide grin sneaks his way to his face “ sorry I’m not the one who can barely walk in the morning,” he winks.
Your jaw drops at his cheeky comment. “ oh yeah we’ll have to change that,” you state smug unsure where all of this confidence came from. Although you weren’t expecting his response.
His eyebrow quirked at your insinuation, before smirking “ alright that can be arranged sometime soon!” He chuckled enthusiastically.
Your eyes widened the scenario playing in your mind quickly.
Hinata loved the shocked but curious expression painting your features. The next thing you new Sho had bolted from his spot jumping into the bed knocking you onto your back as he hovered over you. His hot breath tickled your neck his lips grazing your pulse before giving a nip. One hand had sneaked under the shirt you wore grasping onto your hip while the other kneaded your breast. Your breath grew shaky. He lowered his head to the valley between your breast before looking up to you. Peering at you through his orange waves that dangled in his face.
“You know I still have plenty of energy to take care of you,” he teased his voice dropping an octave. “ so baby tell where do you want me.”
“I want you,” you bite your lip looking at the sinful man in front of you. Your hand grips his chin pulling him up to you face to face, your eyes drop to his lips before returning to his darkened eyes. “In the shower, now get your sweaty ass off of me!” You push his Lunky body of off you before standing.
He groans looking over at you “tease!” He yells.
You turn back sticking your tongue out at him, “ go shower loser im going to make some coffee and breakfast,” you yelled over your shoulder as you headed to the kitchen. Hinata enjoyed the view of you walking away before sighing in defeat, he was really grimy from his run, plus he could use a cold shower right now.
———
You moved around his small kitchen with an air of familiarity. It was about a little over a month since your agreement of friends with benefits began. After fixing a small breakfast and some coffee Shoyo finally emerged fully dressed and cleaned. Taking a sip from his mug and surveying the food you had made. He smiled.
“Damn Y/N this looks amazing!” He smile his signature smile. “You know it surprise me how a girl like you is single!” He doesn’t sense the mistake he had made immediately. You had never talked about why you didn’t want to date before. Not feeling your tragic history with love was appropriate pillow talk. You froze at this statement. Unwanted thoughts and memories swirling in your mind. All of your insecurities starting to surface. Hinata noticed the shift in the air immediately. It was hard not to as your hands grabbed at the counter for some stability. Your eyes trained on the surface, voice caught in your throat. How do you respond to that.
If there’s one thing about Hinata that is certain it’s that’s he’s incredibly caring. He moved around the corner of the counter standing next to your side placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. “Hey Y/N are you okay! Was it something I said? I’m real sorry ya know!” You turn to him tears brimming in your eyes. He doesn’t speak again or ask you to just pulling you into him as you bury your face into his chest as you sob. He places a reassuring hand your back rubbing soothing circles onto your back hoping to help calm you.
It feels nice and it helps a lot more than you expected. Although guilt starts to build as you realize your crying in front of a man you only know through sex. God this is embarrassing. Before you can try to retreat. Sho navigates you to his sofa. After relaxing into the cushions you look up at him. While he’s trying to look calm and reassuring you can sense the worry in him.
He takes this moment to speak. “ you know you can talk to me Y/N I’ll listen to you about whatever you have going on, no judgment.” You sigh looking up at him. Looking up into his eyes you don’t know why you aren’t more hesitant but it honestly feels like you can tell him anything. And so you do. You tell him almost everything. Leaving out names and some of the more gory details. You tell him all about your heartache. And he sits and listens to you intently. Although he didn’t show it he was furious with how you had been treated. But he didn’t want to interrupt your venting. It felt really nice to actually talk to someone about everything and how you feel and Sho was amazingly supportive throughout the whole ordeal.
Wiping the mostly dried tears from your cheeks you gave Hinata a soft smile. “ thank you Shoyo I’m sorry I dropped all of this on you, it probably not what you signed up for.” You gave a nervous chuckle.
He returned your smile, looking at you earnestly, he gripped your shoulder gently making you look up at him. “Hey none of that non sense! You can always talk to me no matter what!” He smiled.
Your eyes shinned up at him with a forgotten emotion. “Really?” You questioned
His smile grew even bigger “Yeah! Absolutely! What are friends for!” He beamed!
Friends.... why did that word give you a pang in your chest.
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yslkook · 4 years ago
Text
sonder
pairing: taehyung x reader (exes au) summary: sonder: the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own. or
“What am I about to say?”
“That nothing has worked out for you since we dated, because even though the women you date are all wonderful, all you see in them is me,” You exhale, “I might have to kick you out if you say something as predictable as that.”
word count: 3459 warnings: alcohol, smut (penetrative sex, oral f receiving, tae is possessive for like half a second, some tears) a/n: inspired by these pictures of taehyung. also if this feels rushed, that was on purpose- i wanted to make them kinda messy 
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Your second whiskey of the evening burns something bitter in the back of your throat, but you welcome it. It’s a welcome respite from the shitty week you’ve had, but that’s besides the point.
One of your favorite things to do to unwind after a tough week is to people watch, and one of your favorite places to do so was at the bars near your apartment. You liked to create vivid stories for these people that walked through the bar- who they were, what their backstories were. It was an amusing game to you, and even if both Yoongi and Hobi told you that you needed a better hobby, you’d only scoff at them.
Speaking of, Yoongi was supposed to be joining you soon. But apparently he’s running late. About fifteen minutes late, according to his cryptic text from earlier:
yoongi: running late, im bringing a friend
You think nothing of it, not really. And you just sip on your whiskey, watching a pair of new faces walk through the door from your stealthy booth in the corner of the bar.
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You should’ve known that when Yoongi had said he was bringing a friend, it meant Taehyung. You briefly remember Yoongi telling you that Taehyung had moved back to the city a few weeks ago.
Taehyung, who had moved away halfway across the world years ago as a novice in the art history world. Taehyung, who had broken your delicate heart and taken pieces of it with him more than five years ago.
But even so, you harbor no ill feelings towards the man. He did what he had to do, and you did as well. It’s been so long now, that he should almost be a stranger to you. 
Yoongi watches the way your lips part in surprise at the sight of Taehyung- he knows there are still lingering feelings, maybe a lack of closure. Maybe something else that you don’t feel like discussing or diving into. You send him a hearty death glare his way but Yoongi ignores it.
You and Taehyung are nothing if not stubborn. Taehyung hasn’t stopped asking about you since he moved back to the city.
After all, you’ve hardly dated since Taehyung broke up with you. You had sincerely, genuinely believed that he was your one and only, your forever. It just hadn’t felt right, not with anyone else. So you just stopped, not wanting to force love with people if your heart really wasn’t in it.
And now, Taehyung is standing in front of you, dressed in expensive black from head to toe, looking as if he had just walked off of the runway before meeting up with Yoongi. His hair is longer than you ever remembered it being, two small silver hoops in his ears.
Handsome. He looks healthy and warm. He looks good.
You clear your throat and wave at both of them, opening your arms for a hug. Yoongi’s hug is brief, you see the man at least once or twice a week, but you pinch his waist for ambushing you like this. You gasp softly when Taehyung wraps his arms around you. You’d apparently forgotten how his body just fits into yours. Even after all this time.
It truly hasn’t been that long, but it feels like it.
“Hi,” Taehyung breathes into your hair. You should pull away, you really should. You can’t even meet Yoongi’s eyes, too bewitched by the hold that Taehyung somehow still has on you. 
You feel as though your heart is running a mile a minute, and yet it feels like you’re greeting an old friend after a long time. 
“Taehyung,” You say softly, his name sounding like a ghost of a memory, “It’s been a long time.”
You sit in your booth and Taehyung sits next to Yoongi. It feels like three old friends catching up after a while, not like if two exes are sitting with their mutual best friend trying not to catch glimpses of the other.
You take a sip of your drink with shaky hands. It’s going to be a long night.
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At some point during the evening, Yoongi claims that Hoseok has an emergency and that he has to go. You think he planned this (both him and Hobi), because there’s a meddling glint in his eye that you haven’t seen recently.
You panic, scrambling to somehow get Yoongi to stay, so that you’re not alone with Taehyung. You’re afraid of what you might do or say. Or for what you might not do or say.
And yet, talking to him comes like second nature. Maybe it’s because you have years of history between the both of you, even if you haven’t spoken in the last five.
It hurt so much. When he broke up with you, you mourned the loss of your best friend. He had said you could try to be friends, but you couldn’t handle it at the time. And then more time went by… and suddenly, he was barely a thought in your passing mind. Yet, he still lingered, in your mannerisms. Maybe some part of you was still waiting on him. Which wasn’t healthy… But it wasn’t hurting anyone. And besides, you were okay. But you had never really believed in soulmates until Taehyung. Perhaps it was the lack of closure. 
At least that’s what you convinced yourself, because seeing Taehyung like this, laughing and talking to you as if no time has past throws you for a loop.
Mainly because… it’s so easy to fall into conversation with him. It’s so easy to laugh with him and make him laugh. You enjoy learning about everything he’s been up to over the last few years, all of his adventures, the sights he’s seen. How enthusiastic he is, how he finds beauty in everything.
You both had always been such good friends. Maybe that’s what you miss more than anything. Somehow, hours go by and you both are left to be the only ones in the bar-
“Hey what brought you here to begin with?” Taehyung asks, holding the door open for you, “Had a bad day? You still like people watching?”
“Yeah,” You say wistfully, “Something like that.”
He squeezes your shoulder in reassurance. You catch his eyes in the streetlights and feel your heart swell.
Even if it’s been more than five years since you saw Taehyung last, since you felt his fingers thread in between yours… it still feels so familiar. It’s funny, isn’t it? How so much time can go by, how you can be strangers on paper but feel like you’ve known his soul for this entire time.
His smile glows in the moonlight. A light breeze cradles him, carding through his dark strands of hair gently. You can vividly recall a time when it was you- your fingers running through his hair through soft laughs and unkept promises.
You wonder if your heart is still his, after all this time. It’s not as if you’ve had many people to compare your all-consuming five year relationship to in the last few years. Every person you met, you found yourself comparing to your ex-boyfriend. It wasn’t healthy.
And you had known that he had moved on from your own mutual friends. You don’t even know if he’s single right now, but you knew he was in a relationship a year ago… Or maybe two? Maybe you should care a little more, but you’ll blame it on the whiskey for causing you to squeeze his hand a little harder and lean into him.
Taehyung looks exactly the same, he feels exactly the same as he did when you were twenty-two and stupid enough to believe that you would make it. He’s always felt like he fit the messy edges of your soul perfectly, and even now, you feel that familiar warmth of his soul rubbing up against yours.
Even as he’s chatting away, eyes crinkling in genuine happiness, you’re hardly listening. You’re only thinking about how nice he feels next to you. 
Serendipity. It must be serendipity, for him to show up in your life again when you had been teetering on the edge of misery and self-deprecation. Your head is jumbled, brain filled with nothing but sweet memories of him and your heart is aching for something you might never have again.
But all you have is now. So when Taehyung twirls you easily and sways with you under the dimmed light of a street lamp, pulling a surprised laugh out of you, you make your decision.
“Where’s your new big girl apartment?” Taehyung asks, a hint of longing in his tone.
“It’s not new,” You scoff, “But I live, like, five blocks away.”
Taehyung takes your hand in his again, asking you questions about your apartment. How you found it, do you like it, do you have roommates. To which you shrug and tell him that you like being alone. Something shifts in his eyes, something sad. He recalls your thirst for life when you both had been together- always ready to try something new, always wanting to be around people, always dreaming with your head in the sky.
He wonders what changed. You’re so quiet, eyes a little dark, shoulders tense. Maybe that’s what growing up is. Maybe that’s what tumbling out of your early twenties and into your late twenties is.
Or maybe you’ve just changed in general. It’s been a long time, after all. Since you both mutually broke up, since he moved halfway across the globe. 
But still, he catches sparks, flutters of embers in your gaze. He catches the tender, playful excitement that you’ve always held near and dear to your heart- it’s what made you and him such a good team years ago.
Talking to him is so easy, not that you thought it would be difficult to begin with. It’s always been easy with him, easy to laugh with him, easy to love him. 
The front door of your apartment building comes into view. Your hand is still in his. Taehyung hesitates on letting you go, but he does.
“It was nice to see you,” Taehyung murmurs, allowing himself the brush of the back of his hand on your cheekbone, “I mean it.”
“Yeah. I’m glad I ran into you, too. Even if I was stuffing my face with whiskeys,” You grin and lean into his touch, “Even if Yoongi probably played both of us.”
“Don’t know when you became such a whiskey girl.”
“It’s been years, Taehyung. I’m sure I’ve got a few more surprises for you,” You say, smile falling into something more intense, “Wanna come find out what they are?”
“Thought you’d never ask, sweetheart.”
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Taehyung’s lips are on yours the minute you close the door to your apartment. His hands are molded to your hips over your clothes and you instantly moan into his mouth loudly, slipping your tongue past his lips eagerly. Drinking him up as if he’s been yours to drink up this entire time.
You fumble with the buttons of his peacoat, nearly ready to yank the buttons off. Patience has never been your strong suit, but you just want to feel him. 
But the minute you pull away for air, you re-center yourself. No matter how enticing his bitten lips are…
“Are you single?” You ask bluntly.
“Why?” Taehyung says with an arch of his stupidly perfect eyebrow, “You falling in love with me again?”
“Shut up, you wish. I thought you had a girlfriend,” You say pointedly, toeing out of your heels and hanging your jackets up in the coat closet.
“You keeping tabs on me? I knew it,” Taehyung says, looking a little too smug about it.
“Shut the fuck up,” You swat his chest, “Yoongi may have mentioned it to me once or twice.”
More like he told you multiple times when you were drunk, wasted and crying over Taehyung because you never truly got over him. In some corner of the deepest part of your heart, you never got over him.
“I’m not dating anyone. Or talking, seeing anyone,” Taehyung shrugs, “That didn’t work out. Nothing’s really worked out, not since…”
“Don’t say it,” You mutter, “Don’t say what I think you’re about to say.”
You need another drink. So you pour yourself another hefty glass of whiskey and pour one out for him, too.
“What am I about to say?”
“That nothing has worked out for you since we dated, because even though the women you date are all wonderful, all you see in them is me,” You exhale, “I might have to kick you out if you say something as predictable as that.”
“And if it’s true?”
“Then I’m definitely kicking you out. Might need another five years to see you again,” You whisper. He moves closer to you, tentatively holding your hips in his. You don’t push him away, only looking up at him with wide eyes.
“I missed you so fucking much,” Taehyung breathes into your hair, wrapping you in a hug, “You have no idea. And you? Are you single?”
“No, you missed the idea of me. Of us,” You mumble, but you’re unable to pull out of his hold, “We were young, we had dreams… And yeah, I’m single.”
“We could’ve made it work-”
“Taehyung, stop it,” You mutter, throat going dry with barely concealed yearning for him, “We both made the choices we made for a reason. You’re here and I’m here for a reason. Don’t wanna talk about what if’s with you anymore. Just kiss me, Taehyung-”
Taehyung doesn’t need to be told twice, cupping your face in his big hands and pressing his soft lips to yours instantly. Time feels like nothing between you both, but it feels like he’s trying to learn this new version of you through your kiss. 
You’re undecided on whether this is a one time thing, but all you know is that you want him. And you want him now. His hands are warm over your thighs as he lifts you up in his arms, your chest plastered to his. His hair has gotten longer, dark strands effortlessly falling into his forehead.
He’s so handsome and you swoon when his lips press against your neck. Taehyung still remembers what you like, what your favorite spots are.
It’s almost as if no time has passed. You both ignore it, ignore the nostalgia creeping into the crevices of your kisses.
“Mmm, my bedroom’s that way,” You mumble hoarsely, pulling away with hooded eyes. 
“You’ll have to give me a proper tour later,” Taehyung says, his voice somehow even deeper.
“Yeah, you’d be so lucky,” You snort and Taehyung shuts you up with another searing kiss. He doesn’t miss the meticulous way you’ve decorated your cozy home, pops of color and decorations that are so very you in every corner. He sees a small photo collage in the corner of your bedroom. 
Once upon a time, a photo of you and him would’ve been the crown jewel.
“Tae,” You mumble, “Stop, focus on me. I want you-”
So he does.
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Your legs close around Taehyung’s head, his tongue slipping into your glossy folds for the third time that evening. He can’t get enough of your soft noises, even when you’re telling him it’s too much, you widen your legs for him to slot in between them easily. Taehyung hikes your legs over his shoulder, nearly rutting into the bed at the sight of your quivering bottom lip and the way your tits bounce.
He palms you lewdly, squeezing and pinching.  “You’re so wet,” Taehyung moans into your pussy, “Fuck, baby-”
“Taehyung,” You breathe, voice sounding broken even to your own ears, “I want you, I want your cock…”
“You sure you want this?” Taehyung asks, his voice strained.
“Yeah,” You nod eagerly, “Do you?” 
With a nod, “Do you have condoms?” He rasps, nose nudging your clit.
“Y-yeah,” You moan, “The nightstand, first drawer. Brand new box, never before used-”
“Really?” Taehyung raises an eyebrow, “When was the last time, baby?”
“The last time what,” You whine, tugging on his forearm.
“Last time you had sex,” Taehyung says, pulling the box out from your nightstand. 
“Uhhh… when you broke up with me?” You shrug sheepishly, rubbing the back of your neck.
“Shit,” He groans, “Seriously?”
You don’t miss how he palms himself over his pants at your words. He’s always had a hint of possessiveness in him, and you already know that he’s trying to process that the last person, the only person to have ever seen you like this was him.
“Yeah, I didn’t have luck the way you did, I guess,” You say lightly, “Not that I was trying very hard, though.”
“Damn, baby, nobody’s been loving you right, huh?” Taehyung says, pulling out a condom from the box with shaky hands.
“Yeah. Not even you,” You say. Maybe that was mean, but his eyes flash at you in warning.
“Come here,” He says, a soft demand, “Did you miss me?”
You shrug playfully and unbutton his pants for him. He swats your roaming hands away and they land on his belly, your nails scratching lazily. Taehyung has always looked like a vision, but seeing him like this, hovering above you with golden, tanned skin and his jaw locked, looking every bit like the man of your dreams...
He commands, demands respect. Your pussy throbs just from the sight of him shucking off his pants and his boxers in one go, tugging his hard and heavy cock roughly with one hand.
You swear you drool. Your head is empty, only thoughts of him, his big hands, broad shoulders-
“Did you miss me, baby,” Taehyung asks again, voice a little rougher, a little harsher.
“Does it matter,” You challenge him, “You only want my pussy-”
“And you only want my cock-”
“So give it to me then. Since you know me so well,” You sneer. You gasp in surprise when he swats your thigh and then moan his name when he pushes the head of his cock into you without much warning.
“You talk so fucking much,” Taehyung breathes, cupping your cheeks with one hand.
“Shit,” You gasp, “You’re so fucking big-”
You squeeze your eyes shut and Taehyung stills inside of you, giving you time to adjust to him. He peppers sweet kisses over your forehead, a contrast to his previous words. You cannot believe that somehow, Taehyung is back in your bed, his cock buried deep within you. 
The thought makes your eyes water. You’re a little overwhelmed.
“What’s wrong,” Taehyung asks when he sees your wet eyes, pressing his forehead to yours.
“Nothing, you’re just so big,” You mumble, avoiding his eyes. Taehyung looks at you suspiciously but says nothing.
He’s the only one who’s ever had you like this. The thought makes something in his belly flare, the urge to leave bruises on your welcoming hips and pound into your wet pussy growing and growing with each second.
But he doesn’t move, not until you give him the okay. Taehyung’s fingers are tight around your hips, loose around your neck, his lips plastered to any inch of skin he can reach. With the first rock of his hips into you, you wrap your legs around his waist and shudder in his arms.
He nuzzles your neck, chest plastered against yours. Your nails are tightly pressed into his biceps, surely leaving marks for tomorrow morning. Your soft cries of his name sound like sweet rapture, something he’s been searching for for years. Or something that he had and something he let go of.
And then he wonders how he ever spent the last few years not buried in your pussy, when you feel something like home to him.
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“You know, I moved back here a few weeks ago,” Taehyung says, turning on his side to face you, hands gentle over your chest.
“Oh, I know. Yoongi and Hobi wouldn’t shut up about it. They really missed you,” You reply, not meeting his eyes.
“And you? Did you?” Taehyung asks again. You hesitate.
“Does it matter, Taehyung?” You mumble, brushing his hair away from his eyes, “Does it change anything?”
“It could. If you wanted it to,” He murmurs, pulling you into his chest. His fingers are light over your spine, but you scoff.
“Don’t say shit like that,” You sigh, pressing your hand to his face. 
He only laughs with his big, bright smile and pulls you in closer, kissing your forehead. “I can leave you know. If you want me to. If this is... weird.”
“I think we’re way past weird, Taehyung. If I wanted you to leave, I would’ve kicked you out by now,” You say easily and ignore the way his smile sends unfamiliar butterflies through your belly, “Go to sleep. I’ll decide if I wanna kick you out in the morning.”
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syubub · 4 years ago
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Yoongi birthday reading/energy check!!
It's sweet sweet tangerine bois birthday!!
I wanted to do a cute little energy check up to see what's up and ask some fun little questions!!
I'm excited so let's just do this shit!!
Disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes and not to be taken as fact!!
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I want to apologize for the absolute shit pictures but what's new lol
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So, let's start with the platform. First thing I noticed was the blue was brighter but the platform was darker? It was like someone cranked up the contrast to 100. Ngl it looked pretty cool. Yoongis platform doesn't typically have a barrier like some of the others do so I just kinda walked in and did the whole, "happy birthday, I have questions" His energy seemed a lot more... vibrant? And playful I guess? It was really nice. Now. The actual connection was intresting because the cord was blue again and like, real thick. (I don't think my perceived thickness of the cord has and real correlation with how strong the connection is. It was just thicc) this time though, the cord was connected at the chest instead of the third eye. So i was like, ??? But my guide didn't give my any sort of helpful input (my guide likes to watch me suffer in my confusion. I'm sure of it)
Anyway, cord like that and then yoobi gave me a headbutt to connect at the third eye. Idk why he gotta be like that :( istg next time he's gonna flick my forehead or something.
I was like "cool cool cool. I want to do the reading now pls" and idk how to explain the energy other than sassy. You know? Blah blah blah I'm thinking, "I don't remember him being so cheeky but maybe I've been gone long enough for him to level up into his final sass monster form"
Anywho, this was intresting because after the little strings were connected and stuff, we plopped down on the floor. And it was like everything I was doing irl was being mimicked infront of yoons energy? So we were sitting facing eachother and I was putting the cards down between us?? Usually that doesn't happen but it was kinda fun!!
Moving right along. I first asked if there was anything he wanted to say or needed to get across and it was 11. Now, 11 has come up before and I'm still not to sure what it's in reference to? My best guess is possibly he's been seeing 11:11 or that it's 2? Idk let me know if you have any clues lol. Other stuff was just kinda banter and stuff.
So so so.
The reading. First thing I asked was how he was doing. And I shuffled his preticular way (when I ask a question I always ask for the energy to tell me how much to shuffle or when to stop. For yoongi it's always 2-2-2. So 2 bridge shuffles, 2 hand shuffles and then split the pile in 2. That's why I think 11 might be 2 to him?)
The cards we got are ace of swords rev, justice,the heirophant rev, the empress.
So based off this I was like okay. I want to pull clarity cards for the two rev cards to get a better picture so I pulled the emperor rev for ace or swords rev and strength rev and wheel of fortune rev for the heirophant rev.
Starting with the ace of swords rev, and the emperor reverse. It seems like yoongi has been re thinking his relationship to control in his life. That's he's possibly noticing any unhealthy needs to control his life and the situation around him. It could also refer to his judgment being clouded by a rigid approach.
With the justice card it makes me think that he's possibly considering a big choice in his life or that he's really doing some deconstructing of his own views. This second idea fits in well with him getting clarity on some possibly unhealthy control issues in his life.
Now. The heirophant rev, strength rev and wheel of fortune reverse. This was intresting to me bc they are all major arcana. The heirophant rev can really talk about no longer needing outside approval and making your own way in your own time bc you are your own teacher. Strength in rev I kinda read as self doubt and feeling down in this case. Like a lack of confidence in himself and his abilities. And the wheel of fortune in reverse I took to mean as his breaking cycles. All together these cards kinda paint a picture about wanting and trying to break a cycle of self doubt and self limiting beliefs and learning more about himself and why he think what he does about himself and searching through everything for truth. It's really good!! In short he's doing some nice soul searching and trusting himself to guide his own way through this self discovery!
The empress! This card seems to pop up for yoobi a lot and I think it really speaks to the abundance that surrounds him! Not just money but the abundance of creativity, love, friends ect.
Now now now. I asked him if there was anything that he wanted to tell us about himself or bts or what's happening in the near future. For that I got 2 of cups, king of wands and 3 of coins.
So the 2 of cups is partnership. Usually romantic. Could be pertaining to the may 13th thing that is ever present lol but I'll get to that later. With the 3 of coins talking about teamwork, this could definitely hint at collaborations coming up!! That's the vibe I get. No one crush my dreams. And for the king of wands it could be talking about taking the reigns on a new project and starting to get it done. Like a new opportunity. This could be a new bts project like starting a new campaign or new venture or maybe personal like the a mixtape or doing more songs for other groups ect.
I had to ask him how he was feeling about the grammys. I had to. Had to. The cards were ace of wands, 2 of wands and death reverse. When these came flying out I could help but smile. Yoongis energy was almost giddy too!
Witht he ace of wands
It's that spark of creativity and inspiration. It's that feeling when you get super excited over some new thing. I think this is the perfect example for feeling reinvigorated. The 2 of wands takes that spark from the ace and tries to funnel that excitement and newness into something directional. Using that burst of creativity to start planning for future progress!! Its so nice to see that! If they don't win (IF) you bet we're gonna get some bangers about a corrupt system. If (WHEN) they do win we'll get bangers about how thankful they are to have gotten where they are in spite of a corrupt system. I just want to hear an uncensored version of yoongi being like, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WE DID IT BITCHES. FUCK ALL YOU BASTARDS THAT SAID WE COULDN'T."
I can dream....
What a nice dream.
Now I asked if there was anything yoobi wanted to say to us as in advice or comfort or anything like that and I got, Clearing negativity, make time for self care, when I'm tuned into the energy of abundance I become abundant. when I'm in a state of appreciation im in vibrational alignment with my true love nature. The world rev, 2 of swords rev and that project, that person, that idea is waiting.
Awe. Take care of yourselves!! Make sure to take time to enjoy what you like and try not to let any negativity get in the way of you enjoying your days. The world rev to me seems to be talking about seeking closure on the things in your life that have been impacting you. Tie up those loose ends so you can move foward without triping over yourself and 2 of swords rev I think talks about information overload and being kinda indecisive bc of that. Take a sep back to evaluate the situation at hand because sometimes it's so close you can't see what you're looking for. Those of you who are studying and getting frustrated because you just can't seem to get it, try taking a step back and doing something to take care of yourself and come back to it so you can approach with a clearer mind. Try not to get stuck or paralyzed by choice but if you do get stuck, take some time to detach yourself from the situation and come back later!
A fair few people wanted an update on yoobis soulmate as well. If you need a refresher here's the run down. Yoongis soulmate is impossible for me to read, yoongi is a smug ass and I'm nosy and probably a little dumb.
Now that that's cleared up
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I asked, "am I missing something?" (As to why I can't connect and why yoongi won't give me answers.)
I got queen of cups, magician and the high priestess. I read this as him being like, "yeah dude, you aren't woke enough"
YOONGI just give me answers pls. The high priestess is intuition and sacred knowledge, the magician is manifestation and the queen of cups is also intuition.
At this point I was like, okay you little shit, can you at least tell me how your soulmate is doing? Can you do that for me?
2 of cups, 2 of pentacles, 9 of wands and knight of wands. 2 of cups is partnership usually romantic, 2 of pentacles is priorities and managing them, 9 of wands persistence, knight of wands motivation for a new thing. His soulmate last time was in the process of going through some shit and figuring it out and it seems like now they've got a better clue of how to move foward and are currently heading towards good things/ important things in their life (possibly like working towards dream career or had an idea for a business the want to start or field they want to go in.)
I was thinking about the next question when this popped into my head, "if you know about your akashic book, do you know about your soulmates? Have you read it?" I used my pendulum. No movement at all. What so ever. "Are you listening to me?" Yes. "So answer my question please" No. "Do you like to watch me suffer?" Maybe. "Do you know the answer to the question" yes.
YOONGI WHY
This cheeky son of a bitch.
Now I was like, fuck it. Imma ask him the big boi question.
"Is your soulmate present when I do these readings?" Yes.
WHY THE FUCK CAN I NIT PICK UP ON IT???
I had to take a deep breath dude. Yoobi is testing my nerves.
"Are they hiding their energy?" No.
I was actually gonna combust. This makes no sense.
I asked yoongi if he would tell me what I'm not getting. Silence. So i ask my guide.
"lol ur dumb"
Watch me Google "how to fire your spirit guide"
Istg this feels like some dumb prank. Maybe I'm just genuinely oblivious to his soulmates energy or maybe I'm just doing something.
What do you want to bet that his soulmate is just hiding under the platform and I'm too stupid to notice or some dumb thing like that.
yoobi, sir, why must you do this?
I decided to continue.
"What message or thing have you learned from your soulmate recently that could be valuable to us?" I got healthy communication in relationships and deep replenishment.
Good to know you can have a nice communicative relationship with your soulmate bc I CAN'T.
I'm petty about it, sue me.
The message does stand though. Good communication and taking proper rest to replenish yourself.
Now I had to ask yoongi directly what he thought of may 13th.
I got the lovers, 7 of swords, the magician and judgement. The seven of swords was intresting and it makes me think there's some extra stuff at play here too. 7 of swords is about getting away with something and deceit. The clarifier was the magician.... this could mean a lot honestly. It could be that maybe yoongi will have his relationship exposed or possibly that maybe him and his soulmate meet but yoongi is disguised? Idk how that would work at all but I'm stumped. There's a lot of variations that this could be. The magician is about manifesting and having everything you need to create what you want. This could possibly mean that maybe he gets a sudden idea that's like, "oh I have to go here right now. Its super important" eventhough he has practice scheduled. So that would let down his team but he would be following his path and it might lead to him meeting his soulmate? Maybe vice versa? Idk let me know what you think??
With the judgement its about inner calling and kinda like the peak. Like shit has been leading up to this moment. With the lovers too it does seem like a union?
I asked him, "but like what's gonna happen on the 13th thought and I got the 10 of cups. Divine love, bliss, alignment, happy mushy gushy shit. This is why I'm so inclined to think that they'll meet on the 13th or things will get serious or their paths finally cross. The cards seem to heavily suggest that.
My dude. Yoongi is really sappy, pass it on.
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For the last question I asked yoomgi if there was messages/ advice he had given to his soulmate that we might benefit from.
First step, open your third eye, open your heart, sign from heaven, open your arms to receiving.
A lot of opening lol.
It's good advice though learning to be open and receptive and taking that first step in tackling life or any situation.
Oki. Now for the disconnecting. It was not nearly as strange as it has been in the past. I was just like thanks dude. Again, happy birthday blah blah and I got up to leave. I noticed it looked like we were in sitting in one of those old plastic hoola hoops? Like the pink and yellow ones lol. As I was looking at and and like??? Off to the side the numbers 13, 28, 54. Obvi 54 isn't a date and then I the last yoongi check up there was book pages and I feel like 54 and 28 were the pages?? I'm not actually sure as I'm writing this so I'm gonna check.
Yep I checked. They are the page #s.
So that's intresting.
Other than that though I just kinda left and he was like, "bye" and that's all.
Not as cool as other yoongi adventures but equally as frustrating.
TLDR
Yoongis doing pretty okay and he's a cheeky little shit. My guide like to watch me suffer and yoobi is mushy gushy squishy.
Happy day of birth Syub!!
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symphonyofthewrite · 4 years ago
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Saw your post, getting stuff off your chest, I just wanted to say that I haven't seen the thing with the kids mentioned by anyone and it really stood out to me, I feel what you mean to some extent, because for me it was a stronger reaction, albeit you probably won't feel the same and that's, obviously, perfectly fine. I have an instant recoil these days whenever a character is around kids for like one second and everyone instantly goes "THEY LITERALLY ADOPTED THEM/THAT'S THEIR CHILD/THEY'RE A PARENT"... genuinely sick of it, and I went white as a sheet when I heard it, I wanted to pluck my eyes out. I don't know if it's an American thing but English speaking fandoms (well, those teeming with fancops that is) seem like they cannot process adult looking characters being in any near proximity to childlike characters without automatically imposing parenthood and family dynamics and it's becoming distressing to me. I feel like Alucard needed to process his trauma and learn to trust and be whole again, he's young himself too, why he needed to be a "father figure" all of a sudden is beyond me.
Thank you so much for the ask!! I don’t get many asks so it makes me happy when I can talk meta with people 💛💛 (Sorry I’m a bit late in answering.)
Funnily enough I actually do agree with you. I didn’t have quite so strong a reaction, but I definitely had a very similar one when I first hear it.
My feelings were and are a bit mixed. I was saying in my other post that I would have preferred that I got to actually see this interaction; see the kids run by him and call him father, and him smile when no ones looking. I still think that would have been a better, more touching way to do the scene, and would have had more chance of me liking it (though I probably still would have felt very weird about it). (I think it especially would have been better because it would show that Alucard himself liked it, not that Greta was forcing the role on him.) I know that it was meant to be something touching, and pretty much everyone seems to like it (and I have seen some cute posts about it), so I just tried to like it too, and focus on the fact that all they were really trying to say was he was having a nice relationship with the kids, and that was indeed sweet.
But yeah, when I heard Greta say “I heard some of them calling you father” for me it was less a reaction of horror, and more a “HUH??!!”moment. When I heard it I was like “Alucard...you agree with this???!! This is how you see yourself??!!” I almost expected Alucard to refute it and say he didn’t see himself as a father to them. Like I seriously do not see Alucard as anything remotely close to a father figure, and it felt weird and wrong to me.
Like when I saw him interacting with the kids the first time, I didn’t think “oh he’s a father figure to them.” I just thought “yay, Alucard’s playing with some kids, and getting out of his bubble!!” I didn’t have any thoughts as to what his relationship role was with them, I just thought that first interaction was lovely.
And if I saw him interacting with the kids again, I still wouldn’t go “father figure” I’d just be like “yay, Alucard’s playing with the kids again, how sweet!!”
Sometimes the relationship doesn’t need a role or a label, ya know?
And I thought it was especially strange because…he literally just met them?? Like how can they possibly start calling him father when he’s played with them once or twice? Regardless of Alucard’s side or things, what group of kids would randomly call a nice man they just met ‘father’? Is...Is this a normal thing??
Anyways, back to Alucard’s side of things, Sypha’s line about Alucard being a teenager trapped an adults body has always been something that stuck with me and shaped how I view Alucard. I definitely view him as internally much younger than he looks. No matter how much I might hate them for what they did to him, I think Sumi and Take are about the age he actually is, and their relationship with him made sense to me. He’s still a kid—or at least young—he still needs his parents in his life, really. (That’s part of why I didn’t like that Drac and Lisa don’t go to him at the end. I personally don’t think Alucard really got closure, and in my mind I think he still very much needed them, and that would have been the perfect ending to his story in my mind, where everything comes full circle; He was forced to lose his parents and grow up too early, and only when he’s started to truly grow up does he get them back.) So yeah, I really don’t see him like a father at all. One of my main focuses in my Castlevania fanfiction is his relationship with Dracula, so I very much see him as the son, not as the dad, even when Drac isn’t around.
(Sidenote, come to think of it, I think this is another reason why Greta x Alucard is a nope from me. She’s very much an adult, so I just see a discrepancy between them that makes me feel weird about them being in a romantic relationship. If we need a label I feel like she fits as an older sister for him, guiding him and giving him support. Him unloading all his problems on her within just meeting her makes more sense if he’s like a younger brother who needs to cry to his sister. I felt weird about it in a romantic context when it was so fast. I mean I know he was desperate to talk to someone, and I probably would have done the same, but still).
“I feel like Alucard needed to process his trauma and learn to trust and be whole again, he's young himself too, why he needed to be a "father figure" all of a sudden is beyond me”
^^ THIS. EXACTLY THIS.
I was honestly really hoping they’d go in depth into him dealing with his trauma, and how he’s still hurting from the wounds of it, and how he needs to heal. I thought that’s what his S4 arc would be about. I don’t think they gave him the chance to really process and work through everything that happened. (Again, I don’t think him just unloading all his problems on a nice stranger is truly working through his trauma. I would have much rather watched him struggle to trust her, and him telling her about his trauma happen later, and be difficult for him, and a deep, heartfelt moment).
Like I was saying in my other post, I think if they framed his arc in how he dealt with the town collectively, I think that would have fit better, and been more touching and satisfying. I would have liked to see him struggling to trust humans, and then see as time progressed how several different people in the town liked him and meant him no harm, and how he realized he could trust them, and that he liked them too. It wasn’t that he had a bad romantic partner and needed a new one. He believed he needed to be punished for killing his father, and in his deep loneliness he let these kids into his house and heart, and they turned on him because he was half vampire. That’s something pretty deeply ingrained, and not something a new romance just fixes by existing. He needed to work through that in a much deeper way.
I know this is gonna be a very unpopular opinion, and it's totally cool if you disagree, but in a weird way... I sort of disliked Alucard’s ending. Don’t get me wrong, Im glad he’s happy, and I’d certainly prefer it to him just getting more trauma like last season (*shudders*), and I don’t think him opening up his castle (and his heart) to humanity is a bad way to end his story, certainly not. I think that fits. And my heart did melt a bit at the "I'm weirdly happy" scene. But, where everyone else is like “*sobbing* happy endings for all our faves” ...I see the creators of the show trying to wrap everything up in a neat little bow, and while that’s certainly not all bad, I don’t love every aspect of that. Theres a time and place for that, but a show based on video games, for which there’s more content in these storylines isn’t one of them in my mind.
Sometimes some of the sadness needs to linger. At the very least, let it linger at the beginning of the season so you can work through it in a powerful way, you know? It may have been tough to see Alucard be more closed off, but I think it would have been more satisfying to see him open up his heart and go back to his old self if we saw his trauma leave lingering effects at the beginning.
To me it didn’t feel like a satisfying arc, it felt like the fairytale ending of “oh look he’s not apprehensive about humanity even after what happened! Oh look he got the girl! And the Castle’s a happy place now! Look he’s not sad anymore! He’s even a father figure to these kids! He’s totally moved on!” And all those things can be awesome when done properly, and when they have depth to them. But they didn’t work through the trauma to get there, so it felt surface level to me, and too fast. I really liked that first episode, and how we saw the two sides of him—one that's become more closed off, and the other that still buries the human despite his comments—and I also really liked the first interaction with the kids, and thought that was one of the few interactions that had depth to it and fit with his arc well. Having it go beyond “they’re helping him learn to like and trust humanity again, and displaying who he really is inside” ended up detracting from the power of his relationship with them in my mind.
Having played SOTN, I think an ingrained loneliness and sadness are, in a way, a key part of Alucard’s character. That sounds really sad and awful out loud but…there are some people that just have a sadness or a loneliness to them, and that's not entirely bad. Here’s the thing…it can make them that much more beautiful. The fact that they still fight for good, even when they see all the dark, those moments when they find true friends, despite how alone they are, those moments when they are happy, are so much more powerful. They just are always a bit…separate from other people. One of my favorite lines in anything is the line "We are connected by our darkness, not by our light" in Pandora Hearts. I think it's a line that fits Alucard well, and it’s always something that’s drawn me personally to him. Don't get me wrong, I don’t think Alucard’s all dark and sad and lonely, he’s definitely got a bright side to him too, of course he does. But I also don't think he ever is able to fully accept the vampire side of himself, and I find that interesting, and worth exploring. Personally I was honestly hoping for the show makers to come up with a bittersweet reason for why he went to sleep for 300 years, (and I thought that's why they set things up with Sumi and Taka that he’d have something against his vampire nature). Personally it felt like they were trying to say “oh he’s all better now, he’ll never be sad or lonely again” and while that’s nice I suppose…for me it sort of…stops feeling like Alucard, in a way? I don't know if I'm explaining it right, or if that sounds terrible...😅
Anyways, back to the topic at hand. I do agree that’s very common of fandom that people are like “boom! Just add water! Instant father figure!” and I don’t love it either. Sometimes it can be cute if it truly fits, but it doesn’t fit every relationship between an adult-looking character and a kid character, and shouldn't be the first place people go to. In the same way every relationship doesn’t have to be romantic, not every relationship has to be parental/familial either. Sometimes it feels like fandom culture isn't really okay to have some characters just be good friends. A good friendship can be more wonderful than a romance sometimes.
If we have to put a label on it, I think he seemed like a nice older brother figure to them? I think that fits who he is in my mind. But father? Nope. Not for me. And again, I don’t think it needs a label.
Thanks again for sending me this ask!! It was nice to get the chance to work through some more of my feelings here too. Sorry if I went too overboard. And I hope I don’t sound too terribly negative, it really was a great season, and I definitely liked some parts of his arc, just not all of it.
If you or anyone else reading would like to discuss with me more, be my guest!! 💕
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tooruluv · 5 years ago
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Tobio Kageyama x F!Reader ( part 3 )
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❝ goodbyes hurt when the story is not finished, but the book is closed. tell me, have we started a new one? ❞
description: it had been years since you and kageyama broke up. it had been years since the two of you left each other, hatred brewing. fate works in funny ways, you thought, as you caught his eye across the café. love works in funny ways, you thought, as you woke up in his bed the next morning, his fiance calling his phone.
genre: forbidden love, cheating, ex lovers, (all characters are aged up)
word count: 1,724
warnings/notes: strong language, cheating, lowkey toxic relationship. but what else is new? this one doesn’t have anything crazy
tag list: @kara-grayson04​​ @sadhwstudent​​ @unlikelytigerqueen​ @kageyamavibes​
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“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”
Tobio Kageyama stood there, only in sweats, and shrugged. He shrugged. You were about to throw something, hit him with anything, when he spoke. This wasn’t the worst fight the two of you had ever been in, but it was definitely up there.
Because this time, it was you doing most of the yelling. “Hana? Out of everyone? Out of everyone? Are you fucking serious?”
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The day you told Kageyama that you were leaving. That day had been the last time you and Kageyama talked. Or, rather, he talked.
It was something you knew for a really long time. Your parents had received a job in the states and you had held off telling him that you were going for as long as you could. Until you couldn’t anymore.
Makeup running down your face, hot tears streaming down your cheeks. And he stood in front of you.
“Why didn’t you tell me before?”
Because you couldn’t bare the thought of telling him. Because you couldn’t look at his face when you said you were going to be gone. Because you didn’t know how he would react. Because you didn’t want to go.
But, despite all of those reasons, you said, “I was scared.”
“You were scared to tell me?”
“Yeah.”
You were literally standing at the airport. In front of the door, your plane ready to take off in two hours. When you said you waited until last second, you truly did.
“You were scared? You waited months. Months.”
“I know I did.” You reached forward but he stepped back. More tears fell down your face. “I just… I just couldn’t think of a way to tell you. I love you so much and I… I didn’t want to say goodbye.”
“How’s this for goodbye,” Kageyama barely blinked. “I hate you.”
Your body seized. Hana, who stood beside you, took your hand but you didn’t feel it. Your entire being fell numb.
“You let me believe we had more time. You let me stay with you, fall in love with you, all when you knew. You knew that you were leaving. And you didn’t tell me for months. I hate you.”
“I hate you.” You would hate him, too, if it was the other way around.
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“Babe!”
You stood at the door to the gym, a bag of food for your boyfriend. He had been so preoccupied trying to master this move for volleyball and hadn’t spent much time with him, so you figured you would leave him some food for that break he takes between practice ending and his own practice (which means several hours with Hinata after everyone left).
The entire team turned to face you. Tobio Kageyama’s face flushed.
He rushed to you, long strides pulling him across the gym. Over his shoulder, two of the boys followed.
“Hey, uh,” Kageyama was awkward. It made you giggle. “What’re you doing here?”
“I brought you some food.” You handed him the bag, and a bottle of water just in case. “You didn’t eat lunch today and I wanted to make sure you at least had a little bit.”
“Kageyama, who is this?” one of the boys, the shorter one, asked as the other one, the tall bald one, said “You didn’t tell us you had a girlfriend!”
“Hi!” you smiled and waved at them.
The team introduced themselves, and you smiled at all of them. Kageyama may have been your boyfriend, but he wasn’t one to introduce you to friends. Or, rather, teammates. Daichi, the captain, even started to lecture your boyfriend on his lack of eating.
“I had milk…” he mumbled.
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“Listen, it isn’t what you think.” Is all Kageyama said. Of course it was all he said.
“It isn’t what I think?” you scoffed, looking to the ceiling. “We broke up and you’re marrying my best friend. It’s exactly what I think.”
“Your best friend that you haven’t talked to in five years.”
“Two.”
“What?”
“Two years. I haven’t talked to her in two years.” You were pissed. Maybe a good old catch up with Hana would make things up, maybe punching her in her stupid perfect teeth would make the nausea in your stomach go away. “And it’s because she stopped talking to me.”
“I don’t get why you’re mad at me.” He was just as pissed, and he probably had way more pent up anger at you. “Maybe if you actually put effort into things, you wouldn’t be in this position.”
“Maybe if I put an effort into things? You’re fucking ridiculous.”
“Yes, if you put an effort into things. Maybe if you fucking talked to people, maybe if you stayed, maybe if you…”
“You know what? I don’t want to hear you tell me what to do or what I should’ve done when you’re the one who cheated on your fiancé.”
“Crazy how you’re this mad when you’re the mistress.”
You grabbed a couch pillow and threw it at him. It was the closest thing you could grab. You wanted a glass, or a plate. Maybe that fake potted plant in the corner will go next.
“You’re such a dick!” you yelled, getting ready to throw another pillow.
Somehow, he reached you before you could throw it. He caught your hands with his wrists, stopping you. You were breathing heavy.
“You know, I thought running into you would give some closure.” Kageyama said. His voice was low, calm, collected. “I thought that maybe, this was it and it was one final time to get the last of the feelings out of my system.”
“Yeah, me too.” You stared into his eyes. They were just as blue as when you left. “Guess we were both wrong.”
You ripped your arms out of his grasp. He let you.
“Marrying Hana. My best friend.” You were standing further away, but you could still feel his breath. “That’s probably lower than anything I’ve ever done to you.”
And you left. You turned around, snatched your bag, and left. As the elevator closed, you watched him watch you.
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Hana was the one who hugged you before you left. She was the last one, other than your family, to see you. She held your head, pulled you to her body, let you cry on her shoulder until they called your plane.
She was your best friend.
While you were in the states, she would facetime you. Call you. Text you updates.
The day you left, she texted you. She kept her end of the deal, too.
hana <3: told tsuki today hana <3: we kissed!! basically i was nervous for no reason lol
you: omg omg omg congrats! at least one of us is having a good time hfksbfsksl
hana <3: don’t worry ab boys. ur gonna have so much fun and meet new people. im always here 4 u.
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“I’m on my way over.” You spoke into the phone, hands still shaking with withheld anger.
“You sound pissed. Can’t wait.”
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The first time you and Kageyama kissed was a little bit into the relationship. It was a couple of months in, and he asked you to go for a walk with him.
“A walk?” you asked, looking around your room for a fitting outfit. “It’s early. And it’s Saturday.”
“I know. I’m outside of your house. Meet me outside whenever you’re ready.”
“You’re insane. Give me five.”
That week, you spent time with Oikawa. Your stomach flipped with the idea that Kageyama had finally had enough of you hanging out with him, or maybe he was going to tell you that he was jealous again. You didn’t know, but an early morning walk with your boyfriend didn’t sound very relaxing.
Cautiously, you met him on your porch. He greeted you with a simple nod, hands in his pockets.
“Um, before we begin, can I say something?” he asked.
You nodded. A jolt through your entire body.
“I know that I complain a lot. And I know that I… I know that I’m not very good with feelings.” He was talking slowly. Practiced. “But I want you to know that even though you spend time with Oikawa, I know that he’s your best friend and I just get jealous. And I want you to know that I know you’re mine.”
“I’m yours.” You confirmed.
“So, I wanted to do this before we started walking.”
And, with that, he leaned down and kissed you. It was a small kiss, a peck to your lips, and he had to bend down to do so. But you felt everything lift off of your shoulders. You were flying.
When he pulled back, he smiled. Genuinely. You did, too.
“Now, I think a walk is in order.” You looped your arm through where he still held his in his pockets.
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Oikawa opened the door, tilting his head at the sight of you. You stood in his doorway, very obviously stressed out and face red with both tears and yelling. You had your hood up, hair still messy from the night.
“You look like you just got done having the best dick ever.” He joked.
You rushed forward, capturing his lips with yours. He staggered back, gripping your hips as you closed the door with your ankle. He didn’t hesitate to kiss you back. You were chest to chest, your hands on his shoulders and standing on your toes.
He pulled away to ask, “So we’re doing this again?”
“I’m pissed off.” You kissed him again. Your hands held the waistband of his jeans. “I’m in dire need of a very big distraction.”
“I’m not complaining.” Oikawa grabbed your jaw and pulled you in again.
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anothertimdrakestan · 5 years ago
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Burn (Tim Drake x Reader) angst????
Words: 1.6k
Req: Hello!! May I request Tim x reader angst?? The song “Burn” from Hamilton is stuck in my head so why not put it into context with Tim cheating on reader?? Thanks and bring on the pain..
omg i love this song and im shit at angst but you only get better from trying right??? so lmk how i did i tried lmao hope you enjoy!
You dove into Bart’s chest as the tears began falling. “Just say it’s not true, say I’m wrong. Just say it” you clutched the fabric of his shirt while he stayed silent, his arms rubbing your back. “I- we- we all thought you guys were over I didn’t realize I would’ve said something but he was so secretive” Bart murmured while you let the sobs wrack your body. 
“All the nights he didn’t come home from the tower he was with her?” You began, pushing Bart away while you felt like tearing your hair out. “Every time he left me on read he probably wasn’t even the person I was texting” you continued spitting out the words in such a way that Bart was flinching at your delivery. “And now, when he needs a fucking reason to be out of Gotham he’s on a trip with her? Just leaving me here like it’s nothing? Like everything we had was just a fun little power trip for him?” you were yelling by now. 
“No- I mean yeah, Tim’s an idiot. But maybe it’s not true, maybe you just need to talk to him or something” Bart piped up, your head whipped around. “Yeah? Who am I gonna talk to? Mr. Taking My New Girlfriend On A Getaway Trip? You know he didn’t take me anywhere. Months. I begged for a day together and he was just too busy. He’s not too busy for her though, clearly she’s everything I’m not.” your anger was seeping from you slowly, the realization that every time he told you he was yours he was probably sharing rooms at the tower with her. “god FUCK how long has this been going on? It’s been like a month since he moved in to the tower- dammit! My friends told me this long distance bullshit doesn’t work but ‘oh y/n we’re perfect it’ll be fine! I’ll fly home all the time! We can call every night’ that turned out great didn’t it.” you felt the hot angry tears get replaced with the slow rolling tears that reminded you once again you weren’t good enough to be kept around.
“Do you- maybe- wanna talk to him?” Bart was clearly terrified of you but you appreciated his help. “B, what good is that gonna do? You know Tim as well as- better than me. He’ll give me a shitty excuse that it was ‘for the greater good’ or that I’m ‘just looking at it wrong’ you know he’s better with words than either of us he could run- dammit he has run circles around me like a fucking toy” you had begun scrolling through your phone wondering how many texts got copied and pasted to another text thread with someone he probably cared about more than you.
“So, what are you gonna do then?” Bart had sat next to you on the floor, letting you rest your head on his shoulder while you scrolled through text after text noticing every red flag or lazy text. “Y/n that’s not good to be looking at, you’ve gotta block him or something” Bart whispered, staring at your screen probably reading every message in slow motion. 
“It’s not just the messages I’ll be blocking” you whispered, letting the seething anger slide back in. In what Bart would describe as almost super human speed you began the descent to freedom, blocking, unfollowing, and deleting almost everything that was reminiscent of you and Tim. Then you got to your main instagram account. “Fuck it” you whispered, unfollowing him knowing that tabloids would be starting the smear campaign now. 
It felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders at an immeasurable price- the price of heartbreak which you’ll be indebted to for a long time. 
~a week later~
“I have really got to buy myself some damn pajamas” you groaned to yourself, pushing down the little lovesick demon in your head that was telling you it was okay to keep sleeping in Tim’s hoodies and sweats because maybe he’ll apologize and you can take him back and be in love again and- not gonna happen. The celebrity magazines had been lurking near your apartment for days now, waiting to hear the newest gossip and find out what truly happened as you’d been radio silent- only adding to the interest of the paparazzi. As you realized you had to go outside today you prepared yourself for the onslaught of questions. 
“Y/N L/N WHAT’S GOING ON WITH YOU AND MR. DRAKE-WAYNE?” “MISS Y/N WHY THE UNFOLLOW?” “HAVE YOU BEEN SEEING HIS RECENT POSTS? WHO IS THE MYSTERY GIRL?” you cringed at the last question, reminding yourself that his actions didn’t matter as he hadn’t truly been a part of your life for months. 
Before you could get into the black SUV waiting for you, you were stopped and trapped until you spoke into the microphone in front of you. “Anything you can give us on Tim Drake-Wayne and you?” you took a small breath, willing yourself to stay calm. “I’m sorry I simply just don’t know who that is” you smiled between your words, using the confused moment on the questioner’s face to slip into the car and drive off, finally letting you exhale the breath you’d been holding in. 
~two weeks later~
You almost threw up at the sound of a once familiar knock on your door. 
“Y/n, y/n I know you’re here let me in we’ve gotta talk” his voice pleaded from your hallway. After three deep breaths and promises to yourself to stay strong you opened the door. Tim looked normal, it was horrible. You had been fighting to look that normal and were barely holding together but here he was, wearing the shirt he wore the night he told you he loved you with the ever present stern look like nothing had ever gone wrong. He moved to come inside but you blocked his path. “We can talk out here. I don’t have much to say” you hissed, watching him sheepishly back off. “Y/n I just wanted a chance to explain and give my side and-” you cut him off. “Apologize. You’re here to apologize and if you aren’t you’d better leave now” you were screaming and sobbing and melting down internally but you held your composure. 
“Well, yeah, that too. But also we need to issue a public statement because yaknow it’s kinda been going so fast and I think if we could just sit down and work everything out we could stay on better terms because I am so sorry love” you flinched against your own will at the familiar nickname. You took a second to remind yourself that he was again just using his words to get the better of you, you were not going to fall for the same trick twice. “There’s no statement Tim, I’m not clearing your name or coming to your side- hell, I’m going to go work with fucking lexcorp so you won’t even have to worry about seeing me at the office. You and I are separate entities, you broke that relationship when you began the lies and the goddamn cheating, there’s no public statement I’d make that would put you in a better light you’re lucky as hell that this is all I’m saying got it?” you watched him flinch at your words and against all your control you could feel your body begging you to hug him and kiss away the pain like you’d done for months on months. 
“Y/n I want to apologize, I should’ve never- it- it was a lapse in judgement but I want to make it right” Tim pleaded, you watched his facade falter, like he truly felt sorry. “That’s great Tim, I’ll try to remember that when I remember all the nights you said you were stuck at the tower with work when you were with her okay? Sound good? You have a good one okay?” you feigned a smile, shutting the door and crumpling to the ground. 
You let yourself cry silently, burying your head in your hands. Your heart was heavy, it had been learning to beat on it’s own now, not to the beat of Tim’s and it hurt. But it was done? Not really. Not when you’re in the public eye, running a business that would eventually have to work with Wayne Ent. it wouldn’t ever truly be over. Your body was practically turning in on itself, your throat burning as you held in sobs, refusing to let anyone know how deeply this wound would scar. A scar so jagged and deep you feared if would keep your heart permanently broken. 
So how does it end? Because this was supposed to be the closure everyone said you needed. Where you give him a slap in the face for hurting you, telling him to ‘fuck off’ and instantly the pain subsides. But the pain was so intense and raw nothing felt soothing anymore. In a span of weeks you’d lost friends, hell- you’d lost family, and you’d lost love. Because no matter how hard you try to pry the words he said from your brain they creep back in. Nights when he’d call you from the Tower and explain how much he missed you and how perfect you were, days when you got texts about how he missed kissing every inch of your face, memories of the beautiful moments you’d had together that you figured you’d be telling your kids about. Those don’t just die with the relationship. They fester and they boil into your skin, they run through your veins, they flash in your head, reminding you that even when you gave every ounce of love you could muster you still weren’t enough. That’s what will forever stick. So it doesn’t every truly end does it?
Because you can’t burn away scares without leaving a deeper wound. And your wounds were deeper than you could fathom. Your wounds had just simply broken you. 
Tim Drake had broken you. 
So how the fuck do you get fixed?
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chibsytelford · 5 years ago
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Heartbreak
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*** GIF CREDIT TO CREATOR ***
Anon requested -  I would like to request an imagine where the reader( angels someone ) finds out that Adelitas baby is from him. So he was cheating one time on her... im excidet to see how he comes out of this situation 😅 Love your writing ❤️❤️❤️ greets from Germany 😘
Authors Note - OK so I could potentially make this into a 2 parter - this one is mainly angst and heartbreak, the next one could be a bit happier or even just closure? Let me know what you all think. Thanks to the anon who requested this - thanks for reading my writing - I really appreciate it!
Taglist - @agirllovespasta @everyhowlmarksthedead @rebel-without-cause-x @whyisgmora @talicat713 @fangirlingaesthetics @jadesamhart @starrynite7114 @sadeyesgf @sheeshgivemeabreak @elcococruz​ @lady-pswrld​ @scuzmunkie​ - if you would like added to my taglist - just ask :)
It was 3 months ago. 3 months ago when you found out that Angel cheated on you. With Adelita no less. You had met her a couple of times when you went round to the clubhouse to give Angel his lunch, and really you should have known that something could be going on because both times you had went round and she was there, Angel was too busy looking at her and hanging off Adelita’s every word to notice you were there.
One night 3 months ago Angel came home much later than planned, and didn’t text or phone you to let you know where he was, or if he was OK.  You had waited up for him, even though you were so tired your eyes could barely stay open. It was 2am when he finally got home, and the moment he saw you sitting on the sofa he looked like he saw a ghost. You saw the flash of surprise and guilt across his face and your stomach sank. You knew he had done something.
He had warily walked over to where you were sitting and plopped down beside you. 
“I’m sorry querida” he had said, “it meant nothing, I love you, not her” you didn’t even have to ask Angel what he had done, he just blurted it out, guilt getting the better of him.
“Adelita?” you had asked him. He nodded his head twice, shame now his main expression.
“3 years Angel, 3 years with me and I wasn’t enough, so you went looking for someone to fill that void I clearly haven’t” you hadn’t felt heartbreak like this before. You loved Angel with every part of you, and frankly you didn’t know what you would do without him.
“I’m so sorry mami, can you forgive me?” You had known that Angel was sorry by the look on his face, he was close to crying, and in the 3 years you had been with him you hadn’t seen anything close to tears in his eyes. 
After a lot of apologizing and grovelling on his part you decided to forgive him. You told him it would take a while for you to fully trust him again, but that you loved him too much to let him go over this. You had always promised yourself, that if you were ever cheated on you would leave immediately. But there was something about Angel that kept you with him.
---
Things were better with you and Angel. He was constantly telling you how much he loved you, helping more around the house, even telling Bishop that he needed to be home by 8pm every night. And he has stuck to it. Every night without fail you hear the familiar sound of his motorbike pulling into the drive at 8pm on the dot. You had to hand it to him, he was really trying. He told you he hasn’t seen Adelita since that night, and Coco, EZ and Gilly confirmed that it was true. She hadn’t been round to the clubhouse recently, and none of the Mayans had saw her. Until now.
He was late. It was close to midnight and Angel hadn’t been this late since that night 3 months ago. Your mind automatically assumed the worst and you scolded yourself, willing to give Angel a chance to explain. You heard the keys in the lock and Angel entered the living room where he knew you would be waiting for him on the sofa. You smiled at him and it was only half returned.
“Bad day at work?” You asked him gesturing for him to sit beside you. 
“Something like that” Angel took a seat beside you on the sofa, and you noticed he left a bit of distance between the two of you. He started to look around the room, as if everything in it was new to him. “I saw her today” he quietly spoke. “Adelita”. Angel couldn’t bear too look at you.
“What did she want?” you were surprisingly calm. You knew that she was in business with the Mayans and the Cartel so sometimes she would have to stop by to make sure things were running smoothly.
“She's pregnant” it was as if time had stopped. Angel had said the words so casually as if he was telling you about his day. 
“How far along is she?” you already knew the answer, you just needed to hear it from him.
“3 months” Angel reached for your hand and you let him take it. “She swears it’s mine querida, I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t mean for any of this to happen” You nodded your head. 
“What are you going to do?” you knew Angel has always wanted to be a father. You both decided to wait a couple more years before you started trying for your own kids. You knew Angel was going to step up and be there for Adelita and their child.
“I’m going to help her, that kid is mine querida, it deserves a father who loves and cherishes them”. You admired Angel for wanting to step up, and you didn’t blame him one bit. 
“I’m not sure if I can stay with you Angel, knowing you will be raising a child with another woman. I don’t hate you, damn I could never hate you. I just can’t pretend I'm happy for you, because I’m not, I’m fucking hurt and broken, but I know you need to do this”. You squeezed Angels hand and headed to your bedroom to pack a bag. 
Angel followed you through a few seconds later wondering what you were doing. “I’m going to stay with Gillian for a while”. Gillian is your work colleague and the only friend you have in Santo Padre. “I need space to get my head around this, I hope you understand”.
He didn’t really have a choice. He knew it was his fault this had all happened. If he only kept his dick to himself it could have all been avoided. “I understand querida, I love you so fucking much it hurts, but I understand. Keep in contact yeah? Take care of yourself”. You gave Angel a soft kiss on the cheek and walked out of the house you have shared with him for the last 3 years of your life.
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shroomtalker · 4 years ago
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ghostbur and dsmp!wilbur thoughts...
hello! this is being written at almost 5 am so super sorry if i don’t explain things well or it’s shorter than my last dsmp theory post. i’m using my last few brain cells to write this so, here we go! obvious spoiler warning ahead. :)
trigger warnings: death
How Ghostbur and DSMP!Wilbur split in half
we know from tommy's stream of dream being put in prison and the finale for season two, dsmp!wilbur has no recollection of who ghostbur is and calls him "some guy" and a lunatic. wilbur, the version we know that blew up l'manberg, is in the after life. but this leaves the question to.. who was ghostbur? or what was ghostbur?
after the inevtibale destruction of manberg/l'manberg (nov. 16th), dsmp!wilbur asked dsmp!philza to kill him on the spot. there is a lot of intrepertations of how phil ultimately killed him with his sword, however i will be going with the stab to the heart.
wilbur went corrupt. he lost his way and drove down to madness that lead to the end of something he created. something he soon realized was no longer a place of freedom, but more a political armageddon. but.. the wilbur we knew before his demise was caring to say the least. he was charismatic and realistic in the fight of rebellion against the greater dream smp and against dream himself. he was actually.. nice?
ghostbur is a very optimistic person with a couple of flaws (one of them being his lack of memory of what happened when he was alive). he cherished books that were from the past and had sentimental value. he saw everyone as friendly! i mean his sheep was named friend!
when dsmp!phil took his blade through wilbur's heart, a once distorted soul split into two. the past and the corrupt. ghostbur represents who wilbur was and alivebur who is now confirmed to be in the after life this entire time represents the person we knew. the person tommy, knew. when he died, the two halves of his heart fell out of place before they could go back to being one, which resulted into ghostbur being thrown into the mortal world while alivebur was kicking back. this would also make sense for ghostbur's memory. he stated in one of tommy's live streams that he remembers everything up until the election and a few spotty fragments of pogtopia. wilbur went corrupt during the pogtopia arc and the only "true" wilbur we knew was during the beginning of the disc saga.
But, what was Ghostbur's purpose?
ghostbur was a collector of some sorts; he held onto books like i mentioned before that held value. emotional, value. lets not also forget what blue means. when fundy asked what blue meant, ghostbur replies with something along the lines of, "blue is first transparent, then it sucks up all your sadness so it turns blue!"
ghostbur was known to pass around blue. a lot. quite frequently might i add too. he was doing this for closure. dsmp!wilbur never wanted to become corrupt. it only lead to his demise. but he realized that there was no other choice than to blow everything up. blowing up the remnants of pain solves all your problems, huh?
ghostbur can also be looked at being a sort of coping mechanism for dsmp!tommy, who really struggled with the death of dsmp!wilbur. the kid even said l'manberg was all he had LEFT of him. ghostbur being around tommy gave him a sense of security that he could no longer latch onto the more tubbo became political and the distrust errupting between their friendship. once the disc saga was finally done.. ghostbur left. his purpose was done. he helped tommy get through the pain to achieve a life time goal: getting the discs back.
i would also like to add when dsmp!wilbur said he didn't want to come back adn rather stay in the after life makes perfect sense for him. his main goal was blowing up l'manberg when he realized that it can no longer be what it was for, a place where man can do whatever he please. once destroying it, he asked phil to kill him because:
A) can't handle the pain anymore and needed to be taken out of his misery. B) he accomplished his goal and there was nothing more to be done, so death was the only option.
im super sorry if this one was really sad towards the end, i just wanted to share my thoughts since season three of the smp is kicking and wanted to close some of my theories. this was really fun to write so i hope you all enjoyed! again, if you have any questions/suggestions/anything to add on, please send me a message! <3
--- written January 31st, 2021 - February 1st, 2021.
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