#and remus and james would just stare horrified and be like “no????”

[mydeadgaywizards]

sirius and/or regulus telling a story: "when i was little..."

remus and james: *braces for the absolute worse*

[dismalflo]

Hello love!! Im obsessed with your writing and was stoked to see your requests open🧡!

I love oblivious reader and was thinking poly!marauders x oblivious! reader who sees all their friends pairing off and establishing their careers and feels stuck in a rut. Like theyre in the same place they were last year, and doesn't realize theyre living in domestic bliss with the marauders (like they thought theyve been dating and reader is like what? we dont just kiss platonically?)

hi darling! thankyou for requesting! I loved this request. <3

poly!marauders x reader who kiss, but like... platonically right? ✩ 1.3k words

cw: oblivious reader, fluff, established-ish relationship

"Do you guys think it’s weird?" you ask quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. You're stretched out across the boys’ sofa, legs resting comfortably over Remus and Sirius' laps, while James sits on the floor in front of you, his gaze fixed on your face.

"Think what’s weird, angel?" James responds, a slight tilt of his head, his eyes soft with curiosity as he meets your gaze.

"That I'm always either at home or here," you say, your shoulders lifting in a nonchalant shrug, though there's a hint of vulnerability in your tone.

"Why would that be weird, poppet?" Sirius chimes in, his hand lazily settling on your shin, rubbing gentle circles with his thumb.

"Well… everyone else seems to have found their person or whatever," you mumble, trailing off. "And I’m just…"

The three of them exchange glances, their confusion palpable. But Remus looks the most puzzled. His brow furrows deeply, creating a crease on his forehead, and his lips pull down into a small frown. He studies you intently, like he’s trying to piece together a puzzle that doesn’t quite fit.

"Right…" Remus says slowly, his voice soft but laced with concern. "And what exactly do you mean by that?"

You sigh, sinking further into the cushions, the weight of your thoughts pulling you down. "I don’t know. I was just thinking about how Lily and Mary finally moved in together…" Your voice drifts off as you glance down at your hands, suddenly feeling small. "And then there’s me, sitting alone in my flat all the time."

Sirius lets out a soft chuckle, his tone playful, though there's an underlying warmth. "So, you want to move in, doll? You only had to ask."

Your heart leaps into your throat, panic creeping in as you sit up straight, jostling Remus in the process. You flash him an apologetic smile, before quickly turning to Sirius, your words tumbling out in a rush.

"No, of course not!" you say, horrified by the thought. "I don’t want to be in the way of your relationship any more than I already am."

In an instant, all three of them are sitting up straighter, confusion deepening on their faces. James’ mouth moves as if he's searching for the right words, Sirius starts fidgeting in his seat, and Remus just stares at you, his gaze blank.

 “What?” he asks quietly, almost as if he’s afraid he’s misheard.

A thick knot of unease settles in your chest, and for a moment, it feels as though you’ve somehow messed up—though you’re sure you haven’t.

"Well, you guys are all in a relationship, and I just... I just show up to hang out. A lot," you mutter, wringing your hands to calm yourself. "And I’m sure–"

You're cut off by a loud bark of laughter from Sirius, as though you've said something absurdly funny. The other two stare at him, clearly baffled. It takes him a while to compose himself, restarting his sentence several times before bursts of giggles cut him off again.

 "Babe," he snorts, wiping a tear from his eye, "I kiss you—we all kiss you. On the mouth. Regularly." he deadpans, eyes glinting mischievously.

"Yeah, but that’s like, as friends," you say, rolling your eyes. "It's not the same."

"Not the same?" James repeats, his voice low and full of disbelief, though there's a teasing edge to it. "Angel, we’ve been kissing you like this for how long now? And you really think it’s just... friendly?"

You blink, looking between the three of them, suddenly feeling like you’re the last person to catch on to an inside joke you’re apparently the punchline of. "Well, yeah?" you say, confusion painting your face. "It’s just... platonic. Friends kiss each other, right?"

The room falls into a stunned silence. Remus’s mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water, Sirius is now grinning so wide it’s practically wicked, and James is rubbing the back of his neck as if he's trying to figure out how to explain the last year of your life to you in a way that won’t make him burst into laughter.

"Platonic?" Sirius says finally, voice laced with amusement, though his gaze softens, like he’s trying to gently break it to you. "You really think we’ve been... doing all this just as friends?"

You glance down at your lap, suddenly feeling more awkward than you ever thought possible, and bite your lip. "I mean, yeah. You guys are all... dating each other, and I don’t want to make it weird, okay?" You wave your hand in the air, as if trying to erase the thought of them being anything more than just your affectionate friends. 

At this, all three of them exchange another glance, a mix of bewilderment and something else. It’s like a weird kind of realization slowly dawns on them. Remus’s lips curl into a tiny, tender smile, while James looks like he's about to say something but holds back, probably knowing it’s going to be too much for you to handle all at once.

Finally, Remus speaks, his voice quiet and steady. “Dovey, we’ve been under the impression that we're all dating each other.” you nod to agree before he continues. “Including you.”

You blink. "What?"

The room falls into a quiet, heavy stillness. Remus’s words hang in the air like an impossible puzzle, pieces tumbling through your brain, but none of them quite fitting.

Sirius, who had been watching you closely, tilts his head in a way that’s almost endearing, like he’s waiting for you to finally catch up. "We’ve been dating you for months, sweetheart. Not just, like, the three of us. All of us. You included."

Oh. 

“Oh.” you look down at your hands in your lap, trying your best to process exactly what's going on. The boys, to their credit, give you a minute to process all of it. Then, Remus’ hand comes into your line of vision moving to hold one of your hands.

“Is that something you're comfortable with?” he asks, his voice calm and steady.

The response bursts from your lips before you can even think. “Y-yes, of course it is.” You stumble over your words, the nervousness catching you off guard.

James' grin widens, his gaze softening. He reaches up, his fingers brushing the side of your face as he tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear, the touch gentle and affectionate. “Good,” he murmurs, his voice low and warm, wrapping around you like a blanket.

Unable to resist, Sirius pulls you into a playful kiss on the cheek, his lips lingering for a moment longer than necessary. You let out a soft laugh, the weight in your chest lifting as the tension melts away.

“We’ll be clearer from now on, hmm?” Remus hums, his thumb tracing a soothing path along the back of your hand. He leans down to press a tender kiss to your forehead, the gesture grounding you in the warmth of the moment.

Sirius tilts your chin up with a gentle finger, capturing your lips in a quick yet deeply tender kiss. He pulls back slightly, his gaze teasing as he presses a few more kisses to your lips. “Just making sure,” he says with a grin, his tone lighthearted but laced with affection. “Not platonic, not friendly.” He lets the words settle between you, making you laugh despite the fluttering in your chest.

“I think I’m starting to understand now,” you whisper, your voice barely audible as you lean into the warmth of their affection, a contented smile tugging at your lips.

[yasministration]

(not) the traditional way - regulus x crouch!reader

summary: sirius discovers through grapevine gossip that his younger brother is engaged to his long term girlfriend after both their parents found out. wc: 1.5k

It was the awkward time period after curfew when the common room was starting to fill up with people again, but was never busy. Prefects were leaving for rounds, turning blind eyes to their classmates, sneaking out of the common room. It was quiet enough to lay comfortably with friends, but too many people were walking by to be able to have private conversations, meant only for friends. Despite that, Peter came rushing through the portrait, tripping over his feet as he made his way over to Sirius.

“Sirius!” He gasped, slumping down on the couch, panting as he quietly repeated. “Sirius! Your brother - you’ll never guess,” Remus straightened up on the armchair, curious on what Peter had to say. The boy always got the best gossip in the castle, his nonchalant nature causing those around him to spill countless details to him. “Spill it, Wormtail.” Sirius demanded with an annoyed tone, but a glimmer of worry flickered in his eyes.

“Regulus is getting married.”

“What!?” Sirius shot up, his back separating from the couch’s cushions. “To-to who?”

Peter grinned, proud to be bringing him his information. “His girlfriend! She-Crouch!”

“He proposed?” The question came from Remus, who rose from the armchair to sit on the floor, shuffling closer to the pair of boys. Peter shook his head. “No. The parents found out they’ve been together, and took advantage of it – got them engaged.”

Sirius sunk back into the couch, staring directly into the fireplace, rethinking everything. He never thought he and Regulus would drift so far from each other that he’d discover his brother’s engagement through grapevine gossip. He felt a hand on his knee, and looked down to meet Remus’s kind gaze. He smiled at the scarred boy, running a hand through his messy curly hair.

And then suddenly, a clatter of things was hear behind him, and he looked back to find James apologising profusely, books laid out on the floor next to him. He picked them up with shaky hands, nearly tossing them onto the table to scramble towards his friends. “Sirius! Sirius!” He all but screamed.

“Yeah, Regulus is getting married, we know.” Sirius sighed, bouncing slightly on the sofa as James jumped over its back rest to land next to him. “Okay, but did Pete tell you how!?” Sirius looked back at Peter, who shrugged his shoulders at him. “What do you mean how?”

“So I was on patrol with these girls from slytherin and ravenclaw. We were put together because basically the ravenclaw’s partner for rounds is sick, so McGonagall made us a three. But anyway, the point is they got talking. And they were talking about how Regulus and y/n got engaged and obviously I was very surprised.”

“Uh huh…”

“And they noticed that I wanted to ask questions, so instead they just started telling me everything! So basically, one of Crouch's friends accidentally slipped it to her parents, who then told her parents."

"Whose parents?"

"Crouch's parents. And so her mother randomly came to Hogwarts to 'check in' on her, and found her and Regulus snogging near the quidditch pitch after he had practice. So then she told your parents-"

"-Who did?"

"Mrs. Crouch. And they had dinner and organised everything behind their backs. Then your parents told Regulus that they’ve agreed with her parents for them to get married. So they told Regulus, like, ‘oh we get it you’re in love, either propose yourself or we do this the traditional way.’”

Sirius barely caught the entire story, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as James elaborated, arms gesturing widely as he struggled to recall the details himself. But Peter, ever the gossip expert, was nodding along. “Don’t tell me he proposed.” Sirius begged, horrified. James nodded excitedly. “He proposed! In the astronomy tower! And their friends were like hiding and watching it all, and apparently she started crying-”

“Crying!?”

“Stop interrupting!” Scolded James, gripping Sirius’s bicep and shaking it. “Sorry.” “No attitude either! So they’ve been engaged like a week and people found out today because apparently she’s wearing a ring and I think tomorrow they’re going to have dinner with their parents as an engagement celebration thing. I don’t really know.”

“Woah. I can’t believe this.” And he really couldn’t. He never took Regulus for a romantic. He never took a Crouch for a romantic. Sirius closed his eyes, trying to imagine Regulus on one knee in the astronomy tower, and you crying as you hugged him, nodding your head, despite knowing your parents had forced this upon you sooner than you wished. He tried imagining your friends hiding away from you, cheering loudly as you pulled Regulus in for a kiss.

Both of you, newly turned adults, so in love yet so old school.

“Shit, I have to congratulate him.” His words made his friends go silent. Remus nodded below him, pressing his chin onto Sirius’s knee. So the next day, he made his trek down to the Slytherin common room, hoping he wouldn’t miss Regulus after he returned from lessons.

Sirius found Barty returning to the common room, furrowing his eyebrows when he didn’t spot Regulus beside him. “Hey, Crouch!” Sirius called, trotting over to your brother. The boy looked him over once, cocking an eyebrow at him.

“Black.”

“Have you seen my brother?”

Barty furrowed his eyebrows, nodding his head towards the common room. “He should be out soon. He’s going home to see your parents in about half an hour.”

“Oh. Alright. Did he not go to lessons?” Barty smirked at Sirius’s question, teasingly asking “What, worried about your baby brother?”

Sirius scoffed, “No, I’m not - no.” Barty hummed, walking away from Sirius whispering the password to the tall portrait. Barty didn’t manage to enter the common room though, blocked by two figured making their way out.

Regulus wore a tailored suit, his hair sparkly clean as he toyed with his silver cufflinks. He offered his arm to you, and Sirius’s face fell as he saw you. You truly were beautiful, and if he knew you any better, he could have concluded that you were perfect for his younger brother. The sleek, elegant gown wrapped around you was the dark purple of his family’s colour, matching the handkerchief poking from Regulus’s breast pocket. You were smiling at something Barty was saying, clearly pointed towards Regulus.

Regulus’s eyes lifted from your smile, the grin on his face dimming when he made eye contact with Sirius, lingering down the hallway. Sirius lifted his hand up in a hesitant wave, taking a couple of steps closer to Regulus. His younger brother met him halfway down the corridor, your hand still curled around his arm. Clearly, you were hesitant to come with Regulus, not wanting to intrude on their conversation, but Regulus kept you close to him, moving his hand to rest on the small of your back.

“Uh, I heard about the engagement…” Sirius started awkwardly, shoving his hands into his pockets. Your eyes widened slightly and you glanced back towards your fiancé, who nodded slowly. “I just wanted to say congratulations.” Regulus’s lips parted in shock, his eyes immediately glazing with a layer of fresh tears. “Oh, thanks.”

“You too Crouch.”

You rolled your eyes playfully, muttering “Don’t get too used to calling me that.” Sirius chuckled, pleasantly surprised by your comment. “Yeah, Walburga will definitely be happy with you.” He added sarcastically, and Regulus sighed deeply, running a hand over his face.

“Sirius, don’t even get me started. You thought our parents were hard to please? I was sat in a room with her parents for three hours, and I saw her mother nod at the way I drank water.” Sirius laughed, and you giggled, glancing down at your feet and clasping your hands in front of you. “To be fair, I did warn him.” Sirius grinned, holding a hand out to Regulus, who instantly clasped it in his, pulling his older brother closer to him for a quick hug.

“I’m happy for you.” Sirius mumbled, and you took a step back to give the two brothers momentary privacy. Regulus nodded, eyes abandoning him as a tear streaked down his cheek. Sirius turned his gaze to you out of respect for Regulus as he wiped his tear away. “I like you, Crouch.”

“You’re not half-bad yourself, Black.”

“Name your kid after me, will you?”

“Already made that promise to Barty.”

“Barty if it’s a girl, right?”

“Watch it Black!”

“Oi, what are you, stalking us?” Barty trotted over to the three of you, smiling cheekily. “I was keeping a watchful eye in case he pulled some stunt.” Barty clasped a hand on Regulus’s shoulder. “Pull yourself together mate, you have parents to have dinner with.

Your and Regulus’s groans were unanimous. “If they start talking politics or business, I’m leaving and you have to come check in on me, okay?” Your fiancé nodded solemnly.

“So, approximately five minutes in?”

“Uh huh.”

taglist: @ravisinghs-wife, @amatoanima, @starry-remus, @pain-in-the-ashe, @hiireadstuff, @superlegend216, @treefairy-28, @kitkatkl, @rory-cakes, @juliet-f017, @fl0weryannie, @tiaajosephin, @why-am-i-like-this18, @theoraekenslover, @animalcrossingshameless, @azure-drag0ness, @dream-alittlebiggerdarling, @dearlizzies, @girlontheblock, @matcha-kitty13, @thenasoneshots

[bradleysass]

caught - @into-the-jeggyverse - wc: 846 - slightly NSFW

Dinner in the Great Hall is chaos. Loud, noisy, filled with clattering plates and shrieking laughter. James Potter, for once, couldn’t care less about any of it. He mumbled some excuse about needing to finish a Charms essay, waved Sirius off with a grin, and practically sprinted back up the Gryffindor Tower.

Because Regulus Black—Regulus bloody Black, in all his infuriatingly perfect, sharp-tongued, cold-glare glory—is sitting on the edge of James' bed, legs crossed, looking like he owns the place.

He’s in his uniform still, though the green tie is hanging loose around his neck and the top two buttons of his shirt are undone. His robe is pooled beside him, abandoned in a way that looks like sin incarnate.

James shuts the dorm door carefully behind him, tosses the lock charm out of habit—

It doesn’t catch.

He frowns.

Regulus arches a brow. “Problem?”

“Nah,” James says, brushing it off. “Just stubborn.” He closes the distance between them in two steps, palms sliding over Regulus’ thighs with that cocky grin he knows drives him insane. “Unlike someone.”

“Keep talking,” Regulus drawls, cool as ever, but his fingers are already in James' hair, pulling him in.

They kiss like they’re going to starve without it—like they’ve been pretending for months not to want this. And now that the seal’s broken, there’s no stopping.

Regulus shudders when James kisses down his neck, unfastening his trousers with the kind of reckless confidence that usually gets him detention. But this? This is worth every bloody rule in the book.

The way Regulus breathes his name—James—is enough to make his knees weak.

He sinks to the floor without hesitation, tongue tracing the sharp cut of Regulus’ hipbone before dipping lower. His hands press to his thighs, firm and reverent, holding him there like he’s a gift.

Regulus lets out a shaky exhale and tips his head back, already lost to it. His knuckles go white gripping the sheets.

It’s slow at first. Teasing. James likes this part—watching Regulus fall apart bit by bit, the way his composure crumbles when James hums around him, lashes fluttering shut.

“Fuck,” Regulus groans, voice ragged. “You're going to—fuck, James—”

That’s when the door slams open behind them.

James freezes.

Regulus doesn’t register it immediately—he’s too far gone—but James feels his entire soul leave his body as a very familiar voice yells:

“Oi, Prongs, you forgot your—WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK—”

James turns his head slowly, painfully, like he’s about to witness the end of his own life.

Sirius Black is standing in the doorway, a half-spilled Butterbeer in hand, mouth hanging open, staring in horror at the sight before him: his best friend, kneeling in front of his very startled, very flushed younger brother.

Regulus makes a strangled sound and yanks the discarded robe over his lap like it’ll fix any of this.

James, still on his knees, lips swollen, hair a mess, looks up at Sirius like a deer caught in headlights.

“Hey,” James says weakly, voice an octave too high.

“Hey? HEY?!” Sirius shrieks, looking like he might spontaneously combust. “WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!”

Regulus, to his credit, straightens his spine, clears his throat, and says with unnerving calm, “A situation you would not be in if you knocked like a normal person.”

Sirius starts choking on his own words. “You—he—you’re—were you blowing him?!”

“I mean,” James mutters, glancing down and then back up again, “I wasn’t not—”

“OH MY GOD.”

There’s a loud thunk as Sirius’s Butterbeer hits the floor. He spins around dramatically—too dramatically—and smacks face-first into the doorframe.

Regulus winces. James yelps.

“Pads, are you—?”

Sirius bolts out the door like the tower is on fire.

A long, horrified silence descends.

Regulus exhales deeply and slumps back against the bedframe. “I am going to murder him.”

“I am going to have to explain this. He’s going to tell Remus. He’s going to tell PETER. Peter is never going to let this go—he’s going to make a bloody chart—”

Regulus rubs a hand over his face. “Why didn’t the lock work?”

James looks at the door, defeated. “It’s been dodgy since third year.”

“Now you tell me.”

“I didn’t think you would want to do this in the dorm!” James protests. “You showed up! And you looked—like that. You can’t just sit on my bed looking like a fucking fever dream and expect me to behave!”

Regulus blinks. “A fever dream?”

James shrugs, half-crazed. “You’re very compelling!”

Regulus snorts, then bites his lip trying not to laugh.

James flops onto the floor with a groan. “He’s never going to let this go.”

There’s a pause, then Regulus smirks and leans over him, fingers slipping back into his hair.

“Well,” he murmurs, dangerously amused. “We might as well make it worth the scandal.”

James blinks. “Wait, are you seriously still turned on right now?”

Regulus smirks. “Are you not?”

James groans again. “Oh, Merlin. You’re evil.”

“And you’re still on your knees.”

“…Point taken.”

[staliamazing]

​​Bucket List - jegulus microfic

dream | @into-the-jeggyverse | wc: 406

"What's on everyone's bucket lists?" Marlene asks, taking a sip from the bottle of wine they were all sharing before passing it to Mary who was sprawled on the floor next to her. "I'm going skydiving for sure."

"I aim to break at least one law in every country on God's green earth." Barty comments, matter-of-factly.

"Not exactly aiming very high, is it Crouch?" Sirius replies with a chuckle. "Bet you're banned from a couple as is." Barty fakes a smile, flashing his pointed teeth in Sirius' direction.

The group go around saying their piece, continuing to banter. After Sirius' turn, he passes the bottle to James, who shrugs and takes a swig.

"Nothing?" Remus asks. "Gotta be something you're dying to do, mate."

"Where's your ambition, man?! Your desires, wishes, dreams?" Barty waves a flask at James accusingly. Of course he brought his own, James thinks.

"I've got dreams!" He pouts.

"Like what, Prongs?" Peter asks, all eyes on the man in question.

"I want to be a dad." James replies, instantly shy. Regulus is resting his head on James' lap, and looks up to meet his gaze.

"Oh. James, you know I can't. Right?" Regulus whispers, ashamed. The dysphoria and self-hatred he would suffer if James got him pregnant would be fatal. The pair stare at each other as the room watches.

"Alright everybody, party's over!" Sirius yells and jumps to stand, motioning to Remus to collect the empty bottles sprawled across the floor and usher everyone else out of the room. Barty is slurring as Evan drags him by the shirt out of the room, muttering about "what I say?"

"Reg." James says once the last person, Pandora, leaves the room after giving them both an apologetic smile.

Regulus stares at the wall.

"Regulus, love. I know. I know."

"Then why would you say that in front of everyone?" Regulus spits, defensiveness building up inside him. "I would rather die than have to..."

"I'd never ask you to. I can't even imagine it, to be honest."

"Good. Don't." Regulus gulps, the thought horrifying him.

"I was thinking more adoption or fostering. The amount of kids who are out there scared right now, just like you and Sirius were, we could help them. You and I know better than most that blood doesn't always run thicker than water."

Regulus hums, inching closer to his boyfriend. "Mm. You'd be a really good dad, you know"

"So would you." 

[luveline]

hiii can you possibly write a poly!marauders x reader who is way too much like sirius 😭 i’m so so so similar to him it’s literally scary and we have the same birthday too??? same everything it’s crazy i think it would be so funny to watch them navigate through Two siriuses 😭

thank you for your request <3 fem!reader

Remus has been in love with Sirius since they were fourteen years old, so falling for you was easy. It was practically already done. 

You’re sitting by the window with a tape player in your lap and headphones over your ears. Pretty mouth turned down, eyes lined with a smudged kohl, you look lovely when you sulk. Remus can’t stand to leave you alone. 

He gives you a moment's peace, of course, but with James and Sirius entangled in a dinner-making argument and nothing left to do, he’s almost forced to sit beside you in the window seat. There isn’t much room, bless, but you don’t argue, leaning back into his arm and continuing your staring out the window. 

“You okay?” he asks. He knows the music isn’t too loud. You loathe being snuck up on. 

“Am I okay?” you ask, turning your head gently to the side, meeting his eyes through the fence of your lashes. Mascara lengthens them, has their ends kissing your brow as you widen your eyes slowly, playfully. 

“Sitting all by yourself.�� 

“I’m not,” you say, the corners of your lips curling into a pleased half-smirk. You’ve too much affection about you to be truly smug. 

“But you were.” He moves the headphones off of your ears slowly. 

It’s a good thing Remus is such a flirt. You’d be hard to keep up with otherwise. He does wonder how James survives it; you and Sirius will flirt brazenly, almost darkly, a seduction in the smallest of things. Picking lint off of his shirt, wiping coffee foam from his lip. And Remus is quieter, not as shy as some might think him but without the darling charm (well, unless he wants it). 

You hold his gaze. “I knew you’d come and keep me company, Remus… that’s what you’re doing, right?” 

He laughs in your face, which isn’t to stay he’s laughing at you. He just can’t not laugh. You’re nerve wracking and sweet and his to flirt with. Plus, you hear him laughing and the majority of your facade melts away as you laugh yourself, the tip of your nose bumping against his sleeve. “Jerk,” you say. 

You and Sirius are different in some ways, of course. Sirius can’t stand having air blown in his ear and you love it, shivering with delight as you curl into his arm. 

“Hello. What’s going on here?” 

James is climbing onto the window seat before either of you can tell him not to. There’s absolutely no room for him nor his muscly arms, his shirt getting caught on your knee and rising, an unreadable mess of limbs and fabric. A tan hand uses Remus as a lift. James straddles your lap, bringing his face up to smile at you lovingly. “Hello, lovely.” 

“James, this is rather selfish of you,” you say. “Me and Remus were having a cuddle.” 

“He had you all last night.” 

“That’s not true. Sirius shared me with him. I was like a cherry pit.” 

James makes a horrified, undignified shriek like you’ve jabbed him in the gut. “What the fuck.” 

“You know full well I didn’t, Jamie, on account of my being the big spoon to your little one.” Sirius arrives, and announces his disgust with a wrinkle of the nose. “I can’t believe I’ve just said that out loud. Domesticity is becoming too much.” 

James is a tall, tall guy, and he’s not skinny either. Remus gives up his seat before he’s pushed from it, and at least finds a new embrace in Sirius’ space, a hand behind his back, ringed fingers ghosting against his spine. 

“Aw, Remus, what are you doing? …Come back,” James whines. 

You laugh again. “You’ve stolen all the room.” 

“Can I be blamed?” 

Sirius wraps his arm around Remus' waist. One moment he’s being hugged, the next kissed, silky soft kisses pressed to his jaw as Sirius murmurs, “You could’ve stood your ground.” 

But then Sirius wouldn’t be kissing him.

“Forget him,” Sirius advises, his lips parting over a soft spot near threateningly. “Who needs him? You have me.” 

“It wasn’t like that!” James insists. “I just missed her when I was in the kitchen.” 

“And I missed you, Jamie,” you murmur. 

Sirius scoffs, to Remus’ delight. “What’s funny?” Sirius asks, pulling Remus’ head back by the hair, not rough or anything but intimate enough of a move that Remus probably has hearts for eyes as he answers. 

“She sounds exactly like you, you realise?” 

Sirius narrows his grey eyes. “Well, it’s not a bad way to sound.” 

Remus has had enough of him, really, the flirting is fun but he misses his boyfriend, especially if James is going to steal the cuddle with you Remus had been aiming for. “I want some herbal tea,” he says, sewing his arms over Sirius’ shoulders, as much love in his touch and gaze as he can possibly fit. “Do you want some? I’ll make it for us.” 

In the same moment, James is holding your cheek and asking what you’d like for dinner, whatever you want, honey, so close you can smell his aftershave lingering from the morning and the minty cherry hybrid smell of his favourite chewing gum. His weight rests on your hip. Remus can see you heating up from over Sirius’ sharp shoulder.

You and Sirius are also very alike in that you both fluster at being treated with care. Immediate melting. Cheeks hot to the touch. 

“I don’t mind, Jamie,” you mumble. 

“I’d love some,” Sirius says, ever so slightly hoarse. 

[mischievousmoony]

I'd love to request Poly!Marauders watching something like Tangled with their girl on a night in. Since Remus(I think) is the only one familiar with muggle movies the others would be fascinated I'm sure! Please and thank you! <3

ahh i love this request! tangled is my favorite disney princess movie!! here's a little blurb for u i hope you like it <3

𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚕𝚎𝚍

⟢ poly!marauders x reader ⟢ warnings/tags: tangled spoilers i suppose

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

It’s very fitting, the way you’re tangled on the bed with your three boyfriends as you watch a movie by the same name. 

You’re nestled in the middle with James, his arms securely around your waist as you snuggle into his chest. Behind you, Remus wraps his arm over your shoulders, his hand tenderly resting on the nape of James' neck. And behind James, Sirius cozies up, spooning him and sweetly kissing Remus’ hand from time to time. All of your legs are intertwined in a way that if a single one of you tried to move, all of you would have to readjust. It’s delightful. 

Remus has seen this movie before, so while the three of you stare at the television in awe, he mostly watches your reactions. He’s loving the way your eyes light up, the sound of James’ giddy laughter, and the way Sirius nods along to every song. 

He watches fondly when a gasp rips from James’ mouth as Rapunzel’s hair is cut. And a chuckle rumbles in his throat a few seconds later when Sirius cheers for Gothel’s demise. 

When tears well up in your eyes as it seems Flynn Rider may succumb to his injury, Remus places a comforting hand on your thigh, rubbing slow circles into your skin with the pad of his thumb. 

You protest against the scene, horrified as Flynn exhales for possibly the last time, “You said this movie was for children, Rem!”

“Shh sh,” he pats your thigh, “watch.”

You pout as you turn back to the screen. It’s only moments later when you intake a sharp breath as relief floods in when yellow tendrils of magic heal the wound. James rocks you gently back in forth happily, silently celebrating the outcome. 

When the movie concludes, you can’t help but squeal in delight. Remus gives your leg a little squeeze. 

“Like it?” He asks all of you. 

“Yeah, it was cute,” James says, acting all nonchalant like the reunion between Rapunzel and her parents didn’t make him tear up. 

“It was lovely!” You say, your voice conveying pure glee, “It’s so funny the lengths muggles will go to bring a little magic into their world. They really drew that whole thing?” 

“Eh- sort of,” Remus responds, “They animated it.” 

At the tilt of your head and the furrow of his boyfriends’ brows, Remus realizes his mistake, “Not animate like Animato. They basically draw it and use technology to give everything movement and life.” 

You huff, “You’re losing me. Muggles are so confusing with their technology.” 

“You certainly like having it around,” James points out, tilting his head up at the television— a muggle product— that’s mounted on the wall across from the bed. 

“I think it’s cool—” Sirius says, his tone distantly fascinated. A smirk plays at his lip, adding to his effort to appear aloof, though everyone knows Sirius has had a bit of a passion for muggle innovation since he discovered record players, “—everything they’ve figured out with a bit of electricity.”

“You’re right, as confusing as it is, it’s quite amazing,” you agree before tilting your head back until you could see Remus behind you. “That was a good movie, Rem.”

“What’d you like most about it?” He asks fondly. His thumb is still rubbing circles into your skin. 

“It was just so…” you ponder over how it made you feel for a moment, “…so magical! It makes me feel ordinary. I wish I could go there and watch the lanterns myself.” 

“Well, you would make a cute princess,” James flirts.

Your face lights up in response, a gasp on your lips indicating the birth of an idea. You sit yourself up swiftly in excitement, your boyfriends’ hands lingering on you, moving with you as you do. 

“I should be Rapunzel for Halloween this year!” You exclaim enthusiastically. 

James shoots up with you in an instant, calling out, “I get to be Flynn Rider!” 

“Oi! No way. If anyone’s Flynn it should be me,” Sirius protests, “Why don’t you and Remus be those red haired blokes or something, you two being the giants you are!” 

Remus and James truly were much taller than Sirius. Even more so you. 

“You want us to dress as brothers for Halloween?” Remus asks incredulously, judgement written across his features. 

Sirius cringes, “Er- okay, maybe not them.”

“I have a far better idea,” James says, “Seeing as I already called dibs on Flynn and I’m obviously the perfect fit with my rugged good looks and charm, why don’t you and Rem squeeze into one of those two person horse costumes as Maximilian or whatever. You can be the arse, Sirius! How fitting!” 

Sirius smacks James on the arm, “First of all, his name is Maximus. Second of all, no way, you dolt!”

As Sirius and James continue to bicker, you twist around to face Remus. 

“Wanna be my prince for Halloween, Remmy?” you ask in a low voice so that your other boyfriends won’t hear. 

“What about those two,” Remus nods at your arguing boyfriends, an amused look in his eye, “James has a point, he’s basically Flynn Rider already.” 

“Mmm, maybe so,” you sink down into the bed again, snuggling into Remus’ arms, James’ having slid away from your waist to fight more animatedly with Sirius. “But you’d be the perfect Eugene.”

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

[junkiepunkie]

The kissing thing - Jegulus

Regulus hadn't meant for Remus to find out about his thing for James, but after a horribly awkward incident during one of their study groups when James had shown up and helped with a few charms questions (not that Regulus needed help, it was all a ploy), he had been caught staring, and Remus would not let it go.

"Is it because he did that thing? Because if it's that, I've got to warn you-"

"Thing?" Regulus asked.

He braced himself for some horrid news about death and ruin and straightness, all of the terrible things he hoped James would never face, but Remus' answer was somehow worse than all of that.

"Oh. You don't know about the kiss thing yet do you?"

"the kiss thing?"

Now Regulus was panicking, and Remus could see it, he shut both their books over in the hushed air of the library at midnight and looked into the younger boys eyes.

"Reg, don't panic, but James, well... James is convinced soulmates are a thing and, god this is awkward, the way James thinks you find your soulmate... is by kissing them."

Regulus nodded slowly. Okay that wasn't that bad, kind of sweet actually-

"And so far, he's 'tested' about seventy people."

"SEVENTY PEOPLE?!?!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three days had passed since the day he had found out James' soulmate 'thing' and Regulus had felt perpetually sick ever since. Remus had explained it in part, James had heard him and Sirius discussing the magic of their first kiss, and the idea had come to him that that was the way to be certain who he was meant to be with. It's not that Regulus cared what people did in their own free time with their own bodies, but merlin, the thought of James with anyone else made him want to die on the spot. Of course, now that he could barely look at him James was desperate for his attention.

At breakfast, he had greeted James with a nod from across the hall only for James to get up and eat at the slytherin table, much to the horror of Sirius and Peter and the absolute knowing glee of Remus. James had bullshitted an excuse of course, something about getting to know the enemy quidditch team's techniques and ways to prank Snape, both things he could have just bribed Barty for information on (Barty was famously easy) and yet he only talked to Reg, leaving the poor boy shaking like a leaf.

In Potions too -Regulus had been moved up a year for his excellence- James seemed to flock to him in every single moment of silence and, much to Regulus' horror, stood close enough to smell. The broom polish and pine scent both made his heart pound and his flipping stomach settle, and when James' hair ever so slightly grazed Regulus' arm when he ducked to pick up his dropped quill, the younger boy had almost simply collapsed entirely.

It was the after dinner walk that had tipped Regulus over the edge. There he was, just trying to enjoy a brisk walk in chill of the early winter, when he had been accosted with a cloak, thrown over his entire being with such speed that for a moment he was back in the family residence being shoved backwards into the cloakroom and locked in for the day in the blackest of black without so much as a candle. The scream that left his mouth at the memory was instinctive.

"Reg! Reg?!" The cloak was hurled away from him to reveal a horrified James Potter. "Hey, Reg I'm so sorry. I've got you, you're safe, I've got you."

Regulus was crying and he knew it. It had been just long enough that he had managed to drive off the memories of home for the school year, but he couldn't stop his most primal of reactions to the thought of reliving the torture. Still, seeing James and his big hazel eyes did help ground him. Certainly, he wouldn't have stopped crying nearly as soon without said eyes boring into his own.

James waited until Regulus' gasps of air and heaving sobs turned into sniffing and wiping stray tears and then softly lowered them both to the ground. They were just ten feet from the shallowest point of the black lake now, a nice view all things considered.

"I'm sorry." Regulus managed to croak out, still wiping his wet face.

James doe eyes widened somehow in response.

"You're sorry? Reg, I scared the light out of you because I thought you looked cold. I should be the sorry one."

This brought a smile to Regulus' face.

"You threw a cloak over me because you thought I was chilly?"

James grinned. "Can't have you getting sick now can I? Without you my potions grades would... well actually they'd be better."

A slither of Regulus' pride had returned by now, so he took this for an insult.

"Excuse me? I'm the best in the class!" he insisted.

James laughed gently.

"Yeah, you are." he stated "But every time I look at you I forget where I am and I can't get the work done."

Everything in Regulus' mind stopped working for a second. What? James had been looking at him? James LIKED looking at him? Oh dear lord, James was distracted by him.

"Now come on, I'm hardly that interesting."

James rolled his eyes.

"Are you kidding? Reg, you might be the most interesting person in the world. You're so kind, but you don't let people see it, you're so beautiful but you hide behind your fancy robes, you're- You cry over cloaks which is SO interesting because who in the world does that-"

Regulus didn't want to cut him off, he never wanted James to shut up in the slightest, but he had to do it, he had to ask, lest his heart explode and his lips lay unused.

"Are you going to test me or what?"

James stopped his rambling and shot Regulus a look of confusion.

"Test?"

Regulus smirked.

"You know, that thing you do, kiss people to test if there's a chance they're the one."

James just stared at him and slowly but surely Regulus began to panic again. Had Remus lied to him? Was James really flat out not even curious if he was the one? Was he that unappealing??

As if James could hear the thought spiral he grabbed Regulus' hand and placed it over his chest, over his heart.

"Reg, first of all I don't know who told you about that test but that was definately a secret I was meant to die with."

"Remus" Regulus whispered, in awe of where his hand was.

James smiled at the dazed look on the boys face.

"Of course it was." He sighed. "But Reg, I have done that in a year, and that's because I don't need to anymore. Can you feel that?"

Regulus looked away from James' face -flushed and perfect as always- and down to his hand. He could, indeed, feel it. James' heart was working overtime, pounding like it was trying to escape his ribcage. It sounded a lot like Regulus' own heart did in his ear drums.

"That's the sign, not a kiss like I thought it was for Moony and Padfood, just this." He explained. "Every time I'm around you my chest aches for you. I just- well, Reg I need you. I need you so much i'm going insane. You haven't looked me in the eye until now for three days! Reg I've been going crazy thinking I'm losing you! Which is stupid I know because I haven't even got you in the first pla-"

Regulus grabbed James' shirt with the hand that had been placed there, and yanked the boy forward, connecting their lips with a desperate surge of energy and passion.

James melted into the kiss, his hands finding their respective paths like they had been training for this moment all their lives, one folding into Regulus' hair and the other grasping his waist. Regulus too unfurled, both his hands gripping onto whichever part of James they could as their lips slotted and their spit mixed and Regulus was sure James could taste the salt left by his tears.

When they separated they were red and panting, and James looked high on the taste of Reg.

"I love you." The older boy confessed, his lips plump and freshly familiar.

Regulus smiled the toothy way he had tried to hide from everyone for years.

"I love you too." he breathed and pulled James in for another kiss, this one quicker but just as electric as the last. "Don't ever do that test with anyone ever again. You're mine."

James bit his lip.

"No need to search around, I've found you now."

[starryeyedwolves]

Her Name is Cleo

Sirius Black had a love.

A great, undying, unwavering love.

Well—two, technically.

One was Remus, his boyfriend of nearly a year, who kissed him like he mattered and made fun of him like he didn’t. The other was Cleo his motorbike.

She was sleek, fast, and—according to Sirius—the most stunning creature in existence.

Unfortunately, he also spoke about her like a man in the throes of passionate romance.

Which led to… problems.

"I think I’m in love," Sirius declared one evening, sighing dramatically as he sprawled across the common room sofa. His head lolled back over the armrest, black hair spilling like ink.

Remus, sitting beside him, didn’t even look up from his book. "You’re already in love. With me."

Sirius grinned, rolling over so he could rest his cheek against Remus’ thigh. "Obviously. But Cleo is a very specific kind of love."

Across the room, James looked up from a game of Exploding Snap. “Hang on. Who’s Cleo?”

Peter blinked. “You’re not cheating on Remus, are you?”

Remus didn’t even blink. “No. He’s not cheating. Unfortunately.”

Sirius sat up, eyes gleaming. “I would never. But Cleo—oh, Cleo is—she’s something else.”

James frowned. “You… met someone?”

"Met her last week," Sirius said, practically glowing. "The moment I laid eyes on her, I just knew."

Peter looked scandalized. "And Remus is just okay with this?"

Remus shut his book with a sigh. “She’s not a person. She’s a motorbike.”

A beat of silence.

James blinked. “Wait—seriously?”

Sirius looked personally offended. “She is not just a motorbike, Prongs.”

Remus rubbed his temples. “Here we go.”

“She purrs when I touch her, Moony,” Sirius said, eyes shining. “Like, a real deep, satisfied purr. It’s beautiful.”

Peter choked on his pumpkin juice. James groaned.

Remus muttered, “This is my life now.”

The problem only got worse.

Sirius brought Cleo up constantly, and Remus found himself in the unfortunate position of acting as the Official Clarifier of the Fact That Cleo Was a Bike.

It wasn’t always easy.

Take, for example, when Sirius burst into the Three Broomsticks exclaiming, "Merlin, Cleo gave me the best ride of my life!"

Remus, mid-sip of his butterbeer, nearly choked. Across the pub, a group of Gryffindor girls giggled. Someone wolf-whistled.

Sirius, oblivious, went on. "I swear, she only gets smoother the more I handle her—"

"He’s talking about his bike!" Remus interjected, louder than necessary.

Peter looked vaguely horrified. James had his face in his hands.

A Hufflepuff boy nearby turned to Remus and asked, “Wait—aren’t you two dating?”

Remus nodded tightly. “Yes. Which is why I feel the need to clarify loudly and frequently that Cleo is not a person.”

Sirius just grinned. “What? It’s true.”

Remus groaned.

Then there was the time McGonagall overheard.

"I’m skipping Hogsmeade this weekend," Sirius had said one morning in the common room. "Spending time with Cleo instead."

"That’s sweet," Lily said with a teasing grin. "How long have you two been together, again?"

"Few months now," Sirius said. "But I knew from the moment I got her that she was the one. She’s wild, but I like that. Bit of a handful, though—"

McGonagall, who had been passing by, froze. "Mr. Black."

Sirius turned. "Yes, Professor?"

She looked him up and down. Then, slowly, she said, "I trust… you are speaking about an object?"

Remus, seated nearby, buried his face in his hands. "His motorbike, Professor," he supplied, voice muffled.

McGonagall stared at Sirius for a long moment before shaking her head and muttering something about entirely too much drama for a Tuesday.

The worst, though, was when Mrs. Potter got involved.

"Sirius, dear," Euphemia said one afternoon, fixing him with a kind but firm look. "James tells me you’ve been quite… infatuated lately."

Sirius, busy polishing Cleo’s handlebars in the Potters garden, grinned. "Yeah. She’s brilliant."

"Mm." Mrs. Potter sipped her tea. "I’d love to meet her."

"You’re looking at her!" Sirius patted Cleo proudly.

There was a beat of silence.

"Ah," Mrs. Potter said at last.

From the doorway, James groaned, "Mum, I told you."

Euphemia turned to Remus with a mother’s concern. "You’re sure he’s not… seeing someone else?"

Remus didn’t even blink. "If he were, he’d be less dramatic about it. No, Mrs. Potter. Cleo’s the motorbike. I’m still the boyfriend. Unfortunately."

"Oi!" Sirius called. "You say 'unfortunately,' but you love it."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Sure, love. Whatever you say."

The thing was—Remus did love it. Love him.

Even if he had to share Sirius’ affection with an inanimate object.

He watched Sirius sometimes—when he thought no one was looking. Watched the way his hands ran lovingly over Cleo’s curves, how he whispered to her like she might whisper back. How he said, “You’re perfect, love,” in the same voice he used when they were tangled together in bed.

It was ridiculous. And sort of sweet. And absolutely Sirius.

“You’re jealous,” Sirius said once, teasing.

Remus snorted. “Of Cleo? Please.”

Sirius leaned in close. “It’s okay if you are. She is very shiny.”

Remus gave him a flat look, which Sirius kissed off his lips before laughing into the space between them.

Remus wasn’t jealous, not really.

Because every time Sirius climbed off that bike, helmet in hand, hair wild and cheeks flushed from the wind, he came back to Remus.

Every time, he’d find him in a crowd, pull him close, kiss him like the world had stopped spinning.

“Missed you,” he’d whisper, soft and sincere.

And Remus would melt. Every time.

So no—he wasn’t actually jealous of Cleo.

But he was definitely going to hex her horn the next time Sirius called her his soulmate in public.

Some things just weren’t worth the headache.

[moonstruckme]

I absolutely love your writing!! Could I request some hurt/comfort poly!marauders? Like maybe people are judging/really rude to reader about their relationship and the boys defend her and their relationship and make her feel better 🥹

Absolutely you can! Hope this is what you were looking for babe <3

cw: bullying, sexual shaming

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words

“Whore,” Lucius hisses as he brushes past you in the hall. 

You hear James’ inhale beside you a second before you whirl. “What was that, Malfoy?”

“Too fucked out to hear me?” he sneers, coming to a stop and turning to face you. Your heart stutters at his words, but you’re careful not to let anything show on your face. “Don’t suppose you’re good for much except sucking dick, but I have to say, I’m impressed those Gryffindors caught onto it before the rest of us. I mean, why else would they bring you in on their precious trio?” His lip curls, and while there’s amusement there, there’s also genuine disgust that makes some small, pathetic part of you shrivel up in shame. “Slut.” 

“Sweetheart?” James asks, and you wonder if the restraint in his voice is as obvious to everyone else as it is to you. Want me to step in here?

You shake your head at him, but your stare is zeroed in on Lucius. You pout at him sympathetically. “I know it must be hard for you to understand. How’d I get three hot people interested in me, when you can't even get one to look your way?” You shoot him your best impression of Sirius’ wolfish grin. “Don’t worry, Malfoy, someone will come along who’s into all your inbred, Nazi bullshit one day. Maybe even a cousin, if you’re lucky!”

You continue back on your way, pretending you don’t need the steadying hand James rests at the small of your back as you stride down the hall. You make it through the common room, up the stairs, and into the boys’ dorm room before you lose momentum, releasing a shell-shocked, tremulous breath. 

James’ arms are around you in an instant, though it takes you a second longer to melt into his embrace. 

“Are you okay? You seemed like you wanted to handle it yourself, but I wasn’t sure.” 

You take a deep breath. “No, you were right. Thanks, Jamie. It just would have made it worse if it looked like I couldn’t defend myself.” 

There’s a shuffling of sheets, and you turn your head to find you’d been so distracted you hadn’t noticed Remus on his bed, studying. He sits up to look at the pair of you with concerned amber eyes, a question evident in his face. 

James saves you from responding, clutching you tighter and pressing a kiss to your head. “Had a run-in with Malfoy.” 

Remus sighs, the sound knowing. “That’s never good, is it?” His gaze falls squarely on you. “You alright, lovely?” 

You nod automatically, though your hands are trembling slightly. You’ve never been good at conflict, but pricks like Malfoy sometimes require you to rise to the occasion. It bothers you that someone like him, whom you don’t respect and whose opinion you couldn’t value less, can still rattle you like this. You know your relationship is unconventional, but it’s good. You haven’t been dating for very long, but you feel the rightness of it every day. Your boyfriends treat you better than anyone can reasonably deserve. You love them. Still…

“Do you think that’s what everyone thinks?” You extricate yourself from James, trying not to sound as pathetic as you feel. At Remus’ bemused expression, you add, “That you guys are only dating me because I put out, I mean.” 

James looks horrified. “Do you think that?”

“No,” you say, apparently too quickly, because neither boy looks like they believe you. “I don’t. I just…I don’t know, it’s stupid to care what people think, right?”

James bites his lip, and Remus looks at you consideringly. “I wouldn’t call it stupid,” he says after a moment. “It may not be the best guiding principle to always do what people want you to, but they’re not usually easy to ignore either.”

You heave a sigh, collapsing onto Sirius’ empty bed. “Exactly. I don’t want everyone calling me a slut all the time now.” 

Remus’ eyebrows shoot up. “What exactly did Malfoy say to you?”

You hesitate, looking to James in the hopes he’ll answer for you again, but before either of you can say anything, Sirius whooshes in the door. 

He completely fails to read the room, all bright eyes and good spirits as he struts over to his bed and leans down over you, his forearms on either side of your head. 

“I just heard about your Malfoy kerfuffle from Marlene,” he says, kissing you with a smack. “That’s my girl.” 

You can’t help but smile a little, his energy infectious. James gets in on the action too, patting your cheek as he sits down beside the two of you. “She was pretty amazing,” he says. “I thought Malfoy was going to shit the stick right out of his ass.” 

“Alright,” Remus says, the tiniest hint of impatience in his tone, “apparently I need to be caught up. What happened?”

“Our sweet angel said that Malfoy gets no bitches,” Sirius proclaimed proudly. “And then she told him to fuck one of his cousins.” 

“Well,” you say sheepishly, sitting up, “that’s not exactly word-for-word.” 

Remus quirks an eyebrow, but he’s smiling. “No? Give me the summary, then.”

“Basically, Malfoy said you guys only brought me in on your relationship because I put out, and uh, something about me only being good for sucking dick,” you say hesitantly, as if every word he uttered isn’t going to be seared into your memory forever. “So then I said he was jealous that I got three people to like me while he has no one, but…um, I did say something like maybe if he was lucky, he’d find a cousin that was into him.” 

All three of the boys are grinning at you, and Sirius plants another smacker on your cheek. 

“Attagirl,” Remus says, nodding approvingly. 

“Thanks.” You hope your face isn’t as red as it feels. “I guess now, I’m just a little worried that Lucius was just the only one who would say something? Like, what if everyone else is thinking the same thing?”

“Sweetheart,” James says, reaching around you to rub your upper arm comfortingly, “anyone who’s spoken to you for, like, point five seconds is gonna know that’s not true.” 

“Wait.” Sirius shakes his head, working to catch up to the conversation that started when he wasn’t in the room. “Are you really worried about what that prick said?”

You shrug, sheepish and a bit ashamed. “It’s not him, it’s more like…my classmates, and my professors. I wonder who agrees with him.” 

“Baby, anyone who agrees with Lucius Malfoy is just placing themselves in the same camp of idiots he’s in,” Sirius insists. His tone is light, but his eyes lock in on yours, feeling out how serious you are about this. “Our relationship isn’t anybody’s business, but our friends already know how you are, and they’ll defend you to anyone who asks.”

Remus nods. “Agreed. If anyone wants to believe that sort of baseless, cruel gossip, they’re probably not the lot you want to be around anyways. Just like Malfoy, yeah? If you cared what he thought,” Remus pauses to raise a playful eyebrow at you, “you probably wouldn’t be suggesting he fuck his cousins.” 

You grin. “Please, like he needed my encouragement on that one. You’re right, though, thanks.” 

James squeezes your shoulder reassuringly. “Don’t let him get in your head, sweetheart. Everyone who matters already knows he’s full of shit.” 

“Yeah, and you should’ve heard Marl boasting about you in the common room,” Sirius adds. “I wouldn’t be surprised if she buys your butterbeers next time we’re in Hogsmeade.” 

You laugh, but stop when Remus levels you with a serious look. “Anyone talks like that to you again, you come straight to us, understand?”

You nod, and Sirius drags you into his side, eager to lighten the mood again. “Yeah,” he declares, “if anyone’s calling you a slut, it needs to be consensual, and it ought to be me.”

[lovely-peace]

After last night...

Summary: After meeting and talking with a certain brown haired boy with those lovely scars in the hospital wing, well let's just say you think about giving people a chance.

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Gryffindor!reader

Part 1 Part 2

I think this is the last part tbh but tell me if you want more. 2.1k wc.

"And he really said that??" Amy looked at me as if he proposed.

"Yeah, I guess." This was so confusing, I couldn't make anything out of it.

"You guess?!!" I shushed Amy, since other people at the table were looking at us. And we shouldn't be so loud on a monday morning at the breakfast table.

"I mean, I don't really know what he means with that and-"

"You don't know what he means? Bi- I mean- Stupid, he means what he says! He wants to know you!"

Her eyebrow raised a bit.

"But-" I searched for the words in my head but there was only blank. "Why?"

Amy facepalmed hard and sighned. "You are hopless. Really hopless."

"Kinda harsh." I whispered.

Amy smirked as she looked behind me. And as if to throw me in a cave of waiting lions, she said: "James, Sirius! So good to see you."

I felt myself tensing at the exclamation of their names and at the fact they were standing not so far behind me.

Amy's smirk widened. "You know my friend and I were just talking about your friend Remus. How is he? We were kinda worried. Is he still in the hospital wing?"

Oh sweet death. Sometimes I wonder, when will you release me fron this torture? This torture which is also called embarrassment or humiliation.

I heard James' laughter.

"Oh, are you now? I will tell him that." I turned around to see him smirking at me. "He is out of the hospital wing, no worries. He got something else that's keeping him in his bed."

Sirius cleared his throat. "And before you think anything not so good of him, he got something we call cowardritis. He's a scaredy-cat."

Amy leaned forward. "And why does he has this sickness?" I could hear her smirk.

"Well…" James raised his hand towards his hair and tried to tame it, which would never succeed. "He may has said something he's embarrassed about."

"To someone, he doesn't know what to expect from." Sirius coughed and quickly looked away from me. But his smirk said more than any word could.

What should I do? I didn't even know him. Like, at all? And I didn't know if he was even serious about anything he said.

"Well.." I started. And I almost just stopped at that. Like always I almost just ignored everything around me. But this time-

"Tell him to get well soon from me."

. . .

James and Sirius stared at me as if I said I wanted to marry a Werwolf. Both of them slowly looked at each other. And then there it was. The smirks of them slowly grew.

"But oh! look at the time!" I grabbed my things and stood up. "We have DADA next, Amy! Can't be late!" I hurried down the hall as I heard Amy say:

"Don't mind her guys. She's just shy."

~~

"Soooooooo…" Amy slowly catched up to me. "You and Remus, huh?"

"Amy." I tried to stop her, but who in this world could ever stop Amy?

"Well, you wouldn't look bad together, I must say that." I could hear her devious smirk. "And he is even tall! And has those brown curls…"

"AMY!" I hid my face between my hands. "Please."

"What? I'm just saying, I can understand you. He IS handsome. And even though the bookish silent guy is not my type, I can understand it."

She sounded so proud of herself. Somehow it made me laugh.

"And those scars? They do make him mysterious and cool."

I couldn't stop my laughter escape my hands. "Amy, Stop."

"Who are you talking about?"

…

Never in my life. Did I turn so fast. Did my laughter die so fast. Never.

Marlene grinned at us. "Perhaps Remus Lupin?"

Amy looked at me and laughed. I bet I had the most horrified expression of the century. This scene could be out of my worst nightmares.

"What did you hear?" My voice was shaking as I looked at her.

Her grin widened even more. "Well that answers my question."

And with that she just turned and walked away.

~~

"Please get a hold of yourself! This is really pathetic." Amy shook her head as I hid myself under my blanket in our dorm.

"She heard us."

I could practically hear her rolling her eyes. "Yeah she did."

"And she thinks I would date Remus."

"I mean is she wrong?"

I threw my blanket to the other side of ny bed and looked up at Amy.

"What?"

"What?" She looked at me clueless and I sighed. I grabbed my blanket again and hid my face again.

Amy almost groaned, like one of those alpha males in these fanfictions- and that was ridiculous, I mean we aren't in a fanfiction.

"Would dating him be so bad?"

I looked up at her again. "What? No, of course not. That's not my point."

She tilted her head. "Then what is it?"

I don't want anyone making fun of me. I don't want to be hurt. I don't want that.

But I do want to know him.

"I don't know."

Amy raised an eyebrow. "Come on, let's go to the common room."

"Why?" My blanket felt so warm.

"Maybe they are there."

And as if that was convincing me to go there. As if the option of seeing his beautiful deep eyes again would make me leave my bed and go the stairs down to the common roo-

~~

"Oh look who the cat dragged in!" Sirius' voice startled me a bit as we came into the room. But he smiled nicely at us and waved us towards their group. James, Lily, Marlene, Sirius and, well he was there.

I tried not to look at him too much, but his eyes were like magnets for my eyes. But somehow I managed to look away.

"Wanna join us? We planned a little get together. And we even managed to get food from the kitchen."

I'm really pathetic.

And my mind was constantly screaming at me. This would never end well, at some point I would be only a joke for them. My mind was going crazy.

But something somehow changed. I don't know what it was. But my mind wasn't the loudest in my body.

No my heartbeat was going crazy.

"Oh, that sounds wonderful!" Amy smiled and looked at me like a mother trying to get her kid to say something. And this kid was struggling. I didn't want to sound mean, but also not to desperate. How do you even talk normal with new people???

I cleared my throat. "Yeah, that wouldn't be so bad I guess."

OH MY GOD I WAS SOUNDING LIKE ONE OF THESE TRY HARDS

But somehow no one looked at me weird. Lily even smiled at me and nodded next to her towards an empty spot on the couch.

And on this side of the couch was next to it the chair Remus was sitting in, but that was obviously beside the point.

Amy sat down next to lily and I sat next to her.

"Sooooo…" James looked at me and Amy. "Why were you two coming down at this late hour?"

"Oh we just wanted a little bit of fresh air, you know?" Amy smiled as she said this lie. And we all ignored that in the common room wasn't even fresh air.

"Well we were just talking about our favorite foods!" Marlene started and looked at me mischievously.

"But didn't we just talk about Re-" James started but Marlene cut him off while looking at him with a look that could kill.

"What's your favorite food?" she looked at me expecting.

"My favorite food?" I blinked two times, somehow suprised that I was already asked something.

"Yeah, or maybe like favorite sweet or something you just really like to have as a snack."

"Well…" That wasn't a so easy question to be honest. But the first thing that came to mind,when I was sitting here… I even smelled it… "Chocolate. I really like Chocolate. Like chocolate cookies or cake."

I laughed. "I love chocolate since I first ate one of these chocolate frogs. Blew my mind."

Now everyone was looking at me like I said something really really mind blowing. Like chocolate was a extraordinary answer, what it really wasn't.

And even those brown eyes, which color reminded me of light chocolate, widened a bit as I looked at him after I said that.

I cleared my throat again. "Well, I dont eat only chocolate obviously. It's one of my favorite sweets, like who doesn't like chocolate?"

I looked around searching for a reason they were being so weird, but I only saw knowing smirks.

"Me." Amy said and smiled at me knowingly. I rolled my eyes.

"How could I forget, your highness?" I remarked at her and she laughed quietly.

"Well…" Marlene looked at me again and I just knew she was not finished with her Cross-examination. "Do you like Valentine's Day? I mean it is next week."

…

Oh. The conversation was going in this direction.

"It's.. I don't know, I mean… It's not bad, I guess?" I couldn't keep the nervous laughter inside of me.

"What do you mean with not bad?" Marlene really seemed like one of these Aurors trying to get information out of me.

"I mean I don't really know how it really feels like… Well no, that sounds dumb, that's not how I meant it! I mean I… Just never, like... had a date on Valentine's Day, so it's not really a special day for me."

Oh my god was I a rambling mess. Why was I even talking that much??? AMY SAVE MEE

"You never were taken out, on Valentine's Day?" James asked bluntly and Lily shot him a scolding look.

"Yeah, I guess." I mumbled.

This was going horribly. I was only making a fool out of me. After my embarrassing monolog I couldn't look into Remus direction, because this was almost humiliating.

I tried to subtly sink more into the couch and more into invisibility.

"I mean, of course we both spend time together in hogsmeade on Valentine's Day."

Amy slid into the conversation like the lord's savior himself. "Then we drink while looking at all these happy couples. And sometimes there is even Drama! It's very amusing."

"Would you like to-" Marlene started and I tensed. But then…

"Marlene stop it, you are making her uncomfortable."

Was Remus' voice always this beautiful? It was so soothing and still steady.

What was I even thinking?

Marlene looked at me now a bit embarrassed. "Sorry, I got a bit carried away. You can just say if I'm being to much."

"But then you could never say anything?" Sirius looked at her teasingly.

"Hey!"

I felt myself smiling now and I couldn't believe it. I was beginning to enjoy myself here. I was sitting next to the marauders and I was laughing. What has gotten into me?

"Well if we are talking about Valentine's Day, I find it very unpleasant." Lily stated while yawning.

"The overpriced chocolate with someone -" a glare shot at James. "Making always a big deal over a day on which we still have school."

"The so called 'big deal' is called being romantic." James looked at her with a hand on his chest. "But you wouldn't know anything about it, wouldn't you Evans?"

"Oh please, the stuff you do isn't romantic, just embarrassing." She shot back unimpressed.

James gasped loudly, while Sirius loudly laughed. And I couldn't help myself and chuckle.

And then I felt it.

His look.

I knew he was looking at me I could feel it. But it didn't bother me. No it just made my heartrate go up and I felt lightheaded.

Crazy, right?

It felt so cosy here, next to Remus the fire. The presence made it so warm here.

"Do you want a bit chocolate?"

I looked to my left and almost drowned in those eyes. WHAT WAS HAPPENING, WHY WAS I SO…??

"Me?" I dumbly asked. He looked down and I almost regretted.

"Well you did just say you liked it? And I have more than enough." He held chocolate towards me but still didn't meet my eyes again.

I softly took it while my mind was silent for the first time as I brushed his hands.

"Thank you."

He didn't react at first but then just nodded.

For someone who said he wanted to know me last night, he was really not so social now. But somehow that didn't bother me. It was a start.

"What's your favorite food?"

I was not a fast person. In fact I would always take things very slow. I mean in what reality are you dating someone after two conversations?

For me? Unthinkable.

He doesn't have to tell me if he likes Valentine's Day or not. He doesn't need to tell me what he likes in girls. Not in our second conversation.

But with food you can really start to know a person, you know?

That's what I searched. A start.

"Chocolate."

[my-castles-crumbling]

Prank Wars

Submission 1 for Wolfstar Bingo! - Rating: T - No warnings - Word Count: 595 - AO3 link

When asked later on, James couldn't really explain how things got this bad. It had started innocently enough- a bit of food thrown at dinner, a funny note sent in class. They'd never pranked each other before. Early on in their friendship, it had been mutually-agreed-upon that their skills were best used as an unstoppable team, rather than splitting up their unique abilities to end up in civil war. Strength in numbers, and all that.

But the tension between Sirius and Remus had reached horrifying heights, and somehow, the two had ended up in an all-out war. James and Peter both struggled to stay out of it, only because they were both too terrified to take sides, and if they were honest, it was much more entertaining to watch from afar.

From James's point of view, Remus and Sirius were evenly matched. Remus was smart. He had brilliant ideas and was skilled at all forms of magic. But he lacked nerve and, of lack of a better word, the utter balls to go overboard.

That, of course, was what Sirius had in excess. Sirius acted first and thought later, which resulted in many situations that caused James to almost piss himself laughing.

Of course, the whole thing was caused by the fact that neither would admit that all of their underlying irritation and anger toward the other was caused by feelings and tension that had been building since September 1st of their first year. James and Peter both had lamented to each other that the way Moony and Padfoot both looked at each other was disgusting, and the sooner the two came to their senses, the better.

It turned out that it was the pranks that did it.

On one random Wednesday evening, Sirius decided it was a genius idea to charm the shower to spray some sort of questionable goo out of the spout, right before Remus showered. This went flawlessly, right up until a very angry Remus tried to fix the showerhead and the whole thing fell off. So, Remus, with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist stomped out of the bathroom, goo cascading down his bare chest and a furious expression on his face.

But, rather than be scared, Sirius was very distracted.

Because up until that point, Remus had been quite shy about his body. None of them had made a big deal of it. They knew of his scars and his desire to hide them, so even though they'd all caught glances, they didn't push him to walk around shirtless like they did. He swam with a t-shirt and changed in the bathroom and that was that.

So this was the first time Sirius had gotten a good look. And from what James could tell, he had quite forgotten how to use his brain. All of his blood had gone...elsewhere.

"Erm, Pads? Help Remus fix the shower, yeah?" James judged him, trying to shock him out of his gaping.

But Sirius, who had turned bright red, was only able to mumble, "Fucking- fuck," under his breath before following a now-quiet Remus into the bathroom.

At first James was nervous that Remus would take Sirius's staring the wrong way. But suddenly, he heard a small thump and a suspicious moan that he was sure he was not supposed to hear.

"C'mon, Wormy, let's go!" he shouted quickly, pulling his friend out of the room just as another moan was heard through the bathroom door.

He figured his friends could finally figure out what to do from here.

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

Havent sent u an ask in a while so ...creep... remus.. lupin *dies*

at first he thought he was jealous of sirius because he kept thinking how pretty he was how perfect he was but by the time he's thirteen he thinks it's a crush, he feels some sort of dread or nausea when a girl links her arm around sirius', feels restless and pathetic when sirius gets asked out on a date by an older girl and he's beaming the entire day and remus is sitting there drowning in jealousy but it's okay sirius is happy and he should've expected this, really, someone like sirius would be asked out all the time, the girls always had crushes on him anyway

he sneaks out with the map and james' cloak after sirius leaves, follows them as they talk about things he doesn't care for like quidditch or wizarding music but sirius talks and laughs and smiles and remus is a step away from falling to his knees, they go to a little cafe and drink coffee and have a light lunch and remus sits next to sirius, close enough to feel the heat, sits in front of them when sirius slips into the girl's seat and watches watches watches as sirius is kissed for the first time and it's not him but it could never have been him because he's fucking filthy, sitting in front of him with a stolen cloak and map

this keeps happening, sirius has a new partner every two weeks and remus is out with the cloak and watches watches watches as he slips his hand up her shirt and sits and stares and goes back up and throws up and repeats it over and over again

no one ever asks him out or looks at him too long and he isn't sure if he wants them to or if he just wants to be asked out for validation, for sirius to respect him, but sirius does respect him, but only because he doesn't know him, he doesn't know that after remus' thrown up he locks the door and slips his hand down his pants and imagines it's sirius and the first time sirius has sex remus is sitting in bed, map in hand, looking at the two names next to each other on sirius' bed, staring, wondering, because as far as he knows this is the first sexual experience sirius is having without remus staring at him - but remus knows what he likes, where he likes it, how he likes it, he leans back and imagines and imagines it's him and

sirius and james start dating somewhere in sixth year and remus feels sick feels perverted because james is so good to him so kind to him and he's so, so resentful to him for having sirius, for touching sirius, he's so guilty for hiding under the cloak as sirius holds james down to kiss him or james fucks sirius and he sits and watches and watches and watches till it gets too much and he does touch himself

he keeps doing it, the thrill of jacking off while they're making out, while they're fucking - they forget everything else when they're together, don't notice a little ruffle in the curtains - but he makes a sound once, twice, the third time they look back and james pulls the cloak off and sirius is so disgusted so pretty and breathless and horrified that remus leaves and jumps off the gryffindor tower with his dick still out and when james and sirius get engaged they fuck on remus' grave for their honeymoon's first night

[uhhlifeig]

First Lie - Jan. 4th - word count: 440 - @wolfstarmicrofic (tw: vulgar language)

Remus opened the door to his and Sirius’s shared flat. 

Sirius was sitting on the living room floor, surrounded by stacks upon stacks of papers. He looked unusually disheveled, holding an envelope and staring at it unblinkingly.

“Sirius?” Remus asked, setting down his bags and walking to where his boyfriend was sitting. “What’s going on?”

SIrius looked up at him, eyes widening. He tried to hide the envelope in his pocket, but Remus saw.

“Sirius, what’s that?” Remus asked. 

“It’s, erm, my…creative writing?” Sirius said. “Yeah, creative writing. For classes and stuff.”

“Yeah, right,” Remus said dryly. “Sirius, please just tell me. I can’t help if I don’t know what’s bothering you.”

Sirius’s eyes darted around the room, presumably looking for the nearest escape. “It’s nothing important.”

“Sirius, c’mon,” Remus coaxed. “I just want to help.”

Sirius looked conflicted for a moment, probably debating on whether to trust him or not.

“It’s- well, first, I gotta tell you something,” he sighed. “Remember when I said that I ran away from home at sixteen on a teenage-hormone-driven whim? Well, I lied. Walburga and Orion- my biological parents- were abusing me, so I left.”

“Oh, love,” Remus opened his arms, offering Sirius a hug, which he gladly took. “I’m sorry. Look, I can hunt them down and punch them in the face for you, if you’d like?”

“Nah,” Sirius chuckled. “Would be funny, though. But back to the story. I left, and they got mad. They tried to get me back multiple times-” he shuddered. “Thank goodness James had the sense to not leave me alone for the few months after.”

It suddenly clicked in Remus’s head. “They- they tried to have you kidnapped,” he whispered, horrified. He wanted to clutch this boy to his chest and never let go.

Sirius shrugged nonchalantly. “Yep. They failed, though, suckers. Anyways, Walburga sent me a letter today. No idea how she got the address, but whatever.”

“No that isn’t just whatever,” Remus hissed. “I’m going to find that bitch and fucking bury her alive.”

“Would be funny, to be honest. Not the point, though. Basically, Orion’s dying and she wants me to visit him in the hospital.”

“Oh, that fucking cunt,” Remus snarled. “Don’t go. Or do, and I’ll go with you so I can deck her. The fucking audacity she has-”

“No, that’s what I said!” Sirius exclaimed. “You can get the hag, I can have a talk with my ‘old man’ and then we can go get ice cream to celebrate.”

“That works,” Remus said, pulling out his phone and opening the Calendar app. “When are we gonna go? Gotta schedule it.”

[thundersarts]

james and regulus and their fair share of ruined first kisses ─ of almosts

that one time james stopped his car on a red light and tried helping regulus getting his seatbelt on because it got stuck, and james being almost there, with his breath hitting against regulus' face and all regulus would have to do was tilt his head a bit and their lips would brush and─ a horn. the light is green again, and there's an impatient middle aged man urging james to step on the gas and regulus finishes getting himself buckled up while james goes back to driving and tries really hard to not think about the hitch of regulus' breath and the blush on his face and, and. god, he's gonna crash if he doesn't get his mind in check.

or maybe when regulus had james tag along to pick out gifts for their friends, because for the first time since school has ended regulus would spend christmas with all of them. instead of his usual ─ spending the entirety of christmas eve mostly by himself ─ regulus would be going over to the house james grew up in and where his brother learned how to be loved. at that point, they held three shopping bags on each hand, both of them, but james wouldn't let them leave the mall without taking regulus ice skating since he's seen the ice rink set up for the holiday season. james used to do it all the time as a kid, and it isn't regulus' first time either, but the time without it has them rusty on their feet and regulus is not complaining about james' hands firm on his own, holding on like a lifeline. he's not complaining about slipping and almost falling on the ice, not when it got james holding each side of his waist and pulling him close and telling him keep your hands on me, love. i won't let you fall. he would, though, complain about james having lost his own balance while being so, so close, with a glint on his eyes and staring down at his eyes, then his mouth, then back at his eyes. all before falling down and only not bringing regulus down with him because he was near the border and managed to hold on for dear life on the sides of the rink. regulus is pretty sure he can go on without ice skating for a couple more years after that.

new years day approached quickly and regulus swears he saw james looking around once the countdown started. for once, regulus didn't feel like hiding. his eyes softened when they met regulus' and just as he was about to make his way over to him, he saw peter, remus and sirius approach him with shot glasses, before handing him one and shouting something that sounded remarkably like a war cry. the countdown ends, and people are shouting and celebrating and regulus is pushed into too many hugs from his liking. once they make their way to each other, james is drunk. slurring over his words and giggling at the empty space drunk. he tells regulus he wants to kiss him. regulus argues that he's too drunk and most likely won't even remember that they kissed tomorrow, and that seems to do it. james is horrified, he announces he wants to kiss him either way, but will make sure he remembers it. regulus is left alone only for a minute before james comes back, a maroon lipstick in hand and putting it on himself. he ceremoniously drops a kiss on the corner of regulus' lips and leaves his mark there. another on each of his cheeks and one on his forehead, just for good measure. he only leaves after promising regulus he would sleep and sober up, and he'd give him a proper kiss on the morning. regulus doesn't mind this almost too much, not when james makes true of his promise when tomorrow comes.

[interstellarlyinlove]

Spy (October 4th)

word count: 701

@wolfstarmicrofic

“How did you even convince me to do this?”

“Excuse me?” Sirius shrieks, then he remembers where they are and covers his mouth with his hands. “Shit. Sorry. But as if! All I did was kind of barely suggest doing this and you ran with it,” He whisper-yells. 

“You would never see me be up to something like this before,” Lily whispers. “You are the worst influence. I mean, I’m in a coat closet eavesdropping on– on–”

“The love of your life?” Sirius grins. 

“Oh, sod off!” Lily’s eyes widen at how loud her tone is and she also covers her mouth. “Do you think they heard us?”

“I doubt it.”

“How are you so calm about all of this?” Lily asks. “What if they need something from this closet?”

Sirius shrugs. “I mean, this is nowhere near the worst thing Remus and James have caught me doing. We could pretend to make out, if you’d like?”

“What?”

Sirius is having so much fun. “Would you prefer to make out for real, Flower? Because I really wouldn’t mind all that much and I think it would make both our boys jealous as fu–Ouch!” 

Lily pinches his forearm hard. “In your dreams, Starboy.”

“That hurt,” Sirius says, rubbing his arm. 

“What do you think they’re talking about?” Lily asks. 

Sirius shrugs. “I’m not that sure, actually, Flower.”

“I feel dirty.”

“Dirty?”

“We shouldn’t be here. I’m in your dorm room! I’m in your closet.”

“Which has the best soundproof walls in the history of closets, apparently,” Sirius says. “If it makes you feel any better, we didn’t even hear shit, Rouge. We might as well never have been here in the first place.”

Lily sighs the biggest sigh in the universe. She sits on the floor of the closet against a wall and Sirius sits next to her. 

Sirius looks at her closely. “So, when did this happen?”

“What?”

“When did you finally admit to yourself that you liked James?”

Lily just stares at him. “We’re not having this conversation.”

“Why not? We’re stuck in this stuffy closet together until Remus and James decide to leave the dorm. We can’t even hear what they’re talking about. We were pathetic enough to try and spy on the people we like instead of doing something like, I don’t know, asking them out. It’s humiliating.” Sirius blinks. “Let’s pass the time.”

“You tell me first.”

“Tell you when I realized I’m in love with James?” Sirius asks, grinning big. “Well, it almost feels like I’ve been in love with him from the moment we met on that Autumn morni– Ouch! Would you stop doing that?”

Lily is also grinning. “Remus. Tell me when.”

Sirius thinks for a moment. “I always knew I loved Remus. As a friend, I mean. He’s the easiest person to love. I think I realized I loved him in a quite different way in Fourth Year, maybe?”

“How?” Lily asks. 

“I’m not saying, Ginger.”

Lily flips Sirius off and he’s about to do the same when they feel more than hear the dorm room door slam shut. 

“Do you think they left?” Lily asks. 

“I think so.”

“Go check.”

Sirius scoffs. “Why me?”

“Because it makes more sense. It’s your dorm.”

“Sure. Because I spend all my time in our coat closet. How absolutely normal and not a cause of concern at all–” Sirius opens the closet door. He turns back to look at Lily. “Shit.”

Lily looks horrified. Sirius can’t keep up his act for long. He laughs. “The coast is clear, 007. You can get out of her– Fucking hell, Lily, ouch!”

“You deserved that,” Lily says, stepping out of the closet. “This room is so much cleaner than I thought it would be.”

“Yeah? We’re not gross, Lily, it breaks my heart that you–”

“You tell anyone about what happened here and you’re dead, Black.”

“Jeez.”

“Goodnight, Lovely.”

“Leaving so soon?” Sirius asks, sitting on his bed. “I feel so used. Why would you throw me aside this quic– motherfucker!”   

Lily hexes him from the door. She winks at him and leaves. Sirius realizes that he had so much fun. He should hang out with Lily more often.