#and things that need new ways to happen

[yunyin]

Would love to see a new snippet of the Peacock Fixed AU if you have any!!

Thanks for the ask!!

I don't have any prose written yet, but the story is a canon divergence from Season 5 ep Evolution. What if Gabriel had given his past self that set of instructions on how to fix the peacock? When there is no impetus to save Emilie, everything changes... but sometimes the more things change, the more they stay the same.

[kayshasiemens]

Rising from the dead to share this painting and then disappear again

I have spent over 90 hours of my life on this thing because I have had the brain rot for the last 2 years of my life (almost 20 if you count when I first read the comics) and it had to express itself somehow

Hope this dramatic bitch feels appreciated

(A Dream of Morpheus, handmade egg tempera on panel, 12x18 inches...if by any chance you'll be at SDCC or Gen Con, I'll be at booth 934/936 at the first one and Art Show #13 at the second one - come see the original, maybe get a print, or just yell/cry about Sandman with me?)

And here, have some more details - I had fun combining some favorite elements from both the comic and the show ♡

[vaguely-concerned]

huh. you know something I just consciously put together for the first time about caterina and lucanis' relationship is that through the game we get to hear them talk about each other a lot, but we get very few chances to hear them speak with each other at any length at all. contrast it with other companions whose storylines have elements of 'believed lost/long time no see relative returns!' like bellara and davrin, where we get to see both of them have several pretty in-depth conversations with cyrian and eldrin. hell I think even rook talks with varric longer in the regret prison scene than we ever get to see lucanis and caterina interact directly.

(and when we do see them interact, it's mostly one-sided -- it is, perhaps unsurprisingly, caterina who is doing most of the talking and giving all the orders, as he ruefully observes is her wont after murder of crows. including jumpscaring him with 'you're first talon now btw' and the shocked pikachu face in five acts he goes through in response lmao. perhaps it's more accurate to say that she talks at him and he reacts, than that they talk to each other much.)

it has such an interesting effect too, because in deliberately denying us direct insight or experience and only having this mosaic of description from each of them to go on, as well as forcing us to pay attention to the negative space of what is carefully not said, it's evocative along the same principle that you never actually show the monster in a horror film. if you've read the wigmaker job you have a clearer image of the more uh. worrying elements at play here going in, but there is something fascinatingly insidious and naturalistic in the way it's 'hushed up' in the game itself. she has his complete loyalty both as a member of her house and, more importantly, that of an abused child to a parent figure. he readily admits several times that she's a difficult person to live with, an even more difficult person to be loved by ("even for me. and I was her favourite")... but never once does he actively blame her nor truly conceptualize that he has every right to do so (that he can be angry with her and still love her, because whether he should or not he unavoidably does), or that she might have acted differently than she did, that she made a choice every time to hurt him. even affectionately he speaks of her as a force of nature, an act of god -- something that can't be reasoned or pleaded with or resisted, something you can only hope to navigate with as little pain as possible and pray to survive. let yourself get carried away by the riptide, resisting it will only make it worse. you don't compromise with a hurricane, you just try to find the best shelter you can and cross your fingers while you wait for it to pass and be calm again.

love is that hurricane. you do whatever she asks. you earn her continued affection day by day by never letting her down. you only want the things she tells you it's okay to want and cut everything else away preemptively. ("A wyvern tooth dagger?? I loved wyverns as a boy --Caterina would never let me have one of these, though." and as we have all wept and gnashed our teeth over, it never even OCCURS to him that he's a like thirty-five year old adult man who can buy himself any dagger he wants at any time. she said he couldn't have one. so he'll never have one. that's just how it works. and maybe if Illario could just accept that and find his peace with it like I have, this whole thing wouldn't be so difficult. oh lucanis.)

such is the price -- and the cost -- of being loved by her, it's a loan on which the interest will never stop piling up. you have to keep paying it down in perfection every day if you want to keep it. who got the worse deal there: the grandson who has abandoned everything else in life to live up to that and mostly succeeded, until the day he's so burned out and broken it threatens to no longer be an option, or the grandson who can never seem to scrape together enough worth in her eyes no matter how he begs, borrows or steals it, how he hustles and plays dirty?

one of the worst things that can happen to anyone is to be loved by a selfish god. another one of the worst things that can ever happen to anyone is to not be loved by a selfish god. (hope that helps, boys!) even in betraying everything else, Illario can't bring himself to hurt his grandmother, because that would defeat the whole point. who would he defiantly be proving himself worthy to, without her. in love, devotion, submission, hatred, frustration, bitterness, everything is defined in relation to her, you can spot the gravitational force of it through how the dellamorte family move through time and space. she -- her love and regard and attention -- is still the sun both of their worlds orbit around, even as adults. the game might never tell you outright 'she used to beat and starve them growing up. for their own good you see, so they'd be strong (and broken down enough for her to build them up again however she wanted but I'm sure that's incidental)', but if you know even a little bit about how these dynamics can work the writing is on the wall everywhere you look and all the more unsettling for it.

follow lucanis' freeze-logic and fraught interpersonal catch 22 irreconcilable mixed emotions problems back far enough, looong before the ossuary entered the picture, and you start to see caterina's ghost around every fucking corner. she is so proud of him. (well, she would be. she made him. she forged exactly the knife she needed and it rests willingly, devotedly, in her hands, it would return to her every time because it doesn't know love as anything but to be a knife. his tama never taught him how to be anything else. his biggest fear with her is that she won't even want him back, the way he is now.) to the best ability of her soul, whatever parts of it survived a lifetime of crow politics and 'five children, eight grandchildren, only Illario and me left now', I think she really does loves him. he certainly loves her, with all the sincerity and artless desperation of a child, of the little boy he was once. and what she's done to him (and to illario, for all his shitty gremlin scar-ass antics lol) is awful. the harm is real, and the love is real, and trying to find a way for these two truths to exist in the same space is driving all three of them their own individualized forms of insane. you know. the way only family can and so often does lol.

through implications and short glimpses and having to put the pieces together yourself, you can have the feeling that there is very genuine mutual love and attachment in this relationship... and that beneath that there is something so profoundly wrong. and the sneaking '...oh shit it gets worse the longer I think about it' horror of that is more effective for me at least than the stark in-your-face presentation of the facts of the matter could have been. the love is here. the love is here. it only ever makes it worse.

[babygirlgiles]

I know that in the comics Matt travels the world (mostly as Daredevil) and even lives in San Francisco twice, but Netflix/MCU Matt has the vibe of a guy who has never left New York City except for maybe like a high school class trip to DC. Like this is a man who went to Jersey once six years ago for Foggy’s sister’s wedding and has never crossed the state line ever again. Him and Foggy house-sat for a law school professor on Long Island and Matt seriously considered making up some excuse to leave Foggy alone and head back home early. New Rochelle is “upstate” as far as he’s concerned. I know this in my heart.

[nanihirunkits]

WE ARE | EP16

[bacchuschucklefuck]

theme of laura | theme of laura II

[lightgamble]

DAREDEVIL: BORN AGAIN | 1.09

Hey, this is it.

[artiquar]

I can't wait to see how they work things out.

[umblrspectrum]

ive been struggling big time coming up with anything funny to draw that hasnt been done yet so have my rw au art dump

[kacievvbbbb]

I need a whole separate series about what the fuck it is cross guild is getting up too. Just a day in the life working for cross guild. with the exact same tone as the most ridiculous episodes of undercover boss.

Because I need to know what the hell is going on over on circus island.

[strungby-sinew]

Butter roll cookie if... if he was.... uh. . . Student at the Parfedia Academy ...

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

but does first ever stop possessing Izuku for good like is izuku just back after the shie hassaiki or is it just until the quirk destroying drug wears off

Izuku being back is temporary. One for All is like a software that all for one changed the settings on. It’s set to run First as the primary person in this body. They don’t know how to switch the settings back. But when that software is interrupted, all that’s left is the hardware that is Izuku’s normal body.

Izuku is back while one for all is gone. But he suspects that when (if) it comes back, he’s going to be shoved back down beneath first. But this is a opportunity to get a message to him that he cannot fucking miss.

But that is not Aizawa’s priority right now. He has his student and he is not letting go of him until he is back, safe and sound, and they can make sure he is back permanently. He may handcuff Midoriya to him. It’s been that kind of time.

They just need to get him the fuck out of here. This was an already-sensitive mission that just turned 9000% more sensitive. They don’t know if all for one has been informed that Midoriya was here, somehow, or that it’s Midoriya running this show instead of his brother. They expect the fallout to him discovering either of those pieces of information to be cataclysmic.

And they still haven’t contained Chisaki yet. Fuck. They need to get Izuku and Eri the fuck out of here.

Izuku: um

Izuku: what exactly does he look like

Aizawa:

Aizawa:

Aizawa: what did you do

Izuku: Imayhavecutoffhisfingers

Aizawa:

Aizawa, bewildered: why

Izuku: he seemed to need them

Aizawa: … why.

Izuku: most people need their fingers sensei

Aizawa: midoriya.

Mirio: he woke up and he locked in sensei

Izuku, at the exact same time: sensei, I woke up I locked in

Okay. Fucking whatever. Chisaki still needs to be contained but he is also… dealing with some things. Other people can handle him. But Midoriya is being immediately evacuated and Aizawa is sticking to him like glue.

Izuku has a problem with that.

He sort of needs them to let him fuck off.

Aizawa, immediately: absolutely not

Izuku knows what All for One is capable of. He knows what he’ll do. If he finds out that Izuku is back in charge of his body, he will lose his fucking mind trying to confirm whether his brother is permanently gone. He will tear through anyone he has to in order to get to Izuku and confirm if his brother is still in there.

And Izuku doesn’t know if he’s been told his brother was here. The league was fucking here, apparently, but Dabi seemed to be… going through a lot. He’s not sure if anyone told All for One. But he needs to assume the worst case scenario, which is that all for one is fucking en route, and he needs to plan for that.

So he needs to pretend he’s still First. And First would fuck off.

Izuku promises that he’s going to come find them immediately. He’s promises he’ll come back. But if he’s First, then he’s fucking off into the streets and hes going to fucking ground while his brother has a lead on his location. He won’t be anywhere his brother may otherwise suspect, like with the heroes.

He’s doesn’t know how much time he has. He needs them to trust that he knows what to do here. Just trust him, Sensei.

Aizawa struggles to do it.

It’s not about trusting Midoriya. He believes him. It’s about everything else in the world that he cannot control.

The last time he saw Midoriya, Midoriya had just saved Kota. His arms were broken. He came upon Aizawa in the woods. Aizawa knew that he needed to be removed from the field immediately.

But he let Izuku take a message to Mandalay.

And then he heard Todoroki screaming Midoriya’s name through the woods. And he just sort of knew that he’d lost him.

And Midoriya’s just been gone since, in a way they might never reclaim him from. Aizawa has been carrying the guilt of knowing that Midoriya may be gone for good and he had a chance to keep him by his side and keep him safe and he just. He didn’t. He thought Izuku would just be gone for a few minutes. And now it’s been months.

He needs to know that he’s going to see Izuku again. He need to know that this won’t be the last time. He’s willing to risk it otherwise. They can, they can cover Izuku up before he’s out there, get him in a car, be careful about any tails—

Izuku goes to nighteye. He offers him his hand.

Nighteyes never fucking talked to this kid. He’s the kid that he thought wasn’t good enough for the job, and the kid whose loss has been tearing apart all might since. He’s surprised Izuku even knows his quirk, let alone offers him his hand.

He takes it.

There. Izuku’s going to see them again, right? And soon.

Nighteye confirms it. And Aizawa reluctantly agrees.

Perfect. Izuku needs someone to help stage his escape from police custody. He needs it to be subtle, elegant, classy. Something all for one won’t notice if he doesn’t already know First was here, but something he’ll believe was First if he does already know. Senpai, you up for the task?

Mirio is so fucking down.

It’s subtle. Classy but passionate. Izuku does have a brief misstep when they first exit, because the last he remembers it was summer, why is it fucking cold outside, but he recovers easily. Mirio once again channels his horse girl trying to soothe a wild stallion energy, but it’s just not enough to convince “First.” “First” fucks off parkour style, and Mirio loses him after a brief but fervent chase. Mirio expects that his Academy Award is in the mail. He cannot wait for his little kohai to work through his possession stuff because he thinks they really have some magic between them.

Aizawa, grabbing Nighteye, immediately: where the fuck is he going

Nighteye, pained: he realized that the last thing all for one would expect from either of them after escaping was to be cooperative with us. He’s going to the school.

Which really wasn’t what Aizawa was expecting. He was expecting to have to go hunt his student down at some dive motel or shitty restaurant in a part of the city without cameras. He didn’t expect he’d just fuck off and go straight to UA.

Kirishima, however, did.

This is because he grievously misunderstood what was happening just now. He assumed his homeboy would be going right back to UA because like, where else would he go. Wait was it a possibility that he might go somewhere else.

Anyway he immediately made a group chat with the entire class in it except for Bakugou or Todoroki. He did not think either of them would be chill about this.

He tells everyone what’s up and tells them to start having people casually walking into the entrance of the school in groups of two or three in like, five minute intervals or something. He doubts Midoriya has his keycard what with the kidnapping and possession and all, and they need him to enter in a very casual way that will not tip off that megalomaniac who wants to adversely possess his body. So everyone needs to go to the fucking konbini right now so he can casually join their group and walk in with them just like any other student. Everyone is out of toothpaste and needs to get some immediately. Except for Todoroki and Bakugou, who, again, will not be chill about this. Tell them after Midoriya is inside the gates. Babygirl is coming home and they are getting him over that finish line.

Before all of this, Izuku didn’t really know how to shake tails and make sure he wasn’t followed. But First did, and he has like, a weird patchwork of First’s memories now. He lived through a select number of First’s memories, many of which were very horrific. But when he was in those memories, he remembers being first, who remembered more than just the instant moment. He personally lived the memory of sitting in the diner with all for one. But when he was in that moment, he thought he was First. And First remembered what his brother did to make him so pissed, and the dead orphanage directors, and the shoe at the bottom of the ravine. So Izuku has some memories he lived and some memories he remembers remembering. The result is a weird hazy patchwork but he definitely remembers how to make sure All for One can’t follow him. He spends the walk over trying to figure out how he’s infiltrating the school without all for one noticing, only for it to be a nonissue.

Iida is slowly walking to the front gate with Kaminari and meaningfully talking about how, oh dear, it looks like he forgot yet another item at the konbini, he may have to go back once more, perhaps in five minutes. Izuku simply slips in between them and tells them to be cool about this.

They are cool about this. They have to be cool about this. The risk of not being cool about this is why Todoroki and Bakugou were not invited.

Bakugou, meanwhile, looking around the common room: *bewildered* where the fuck did everyone go

Iida is still struggling not to cry as he swipes his keycard.

Kaminari does immediately text Todoroki and Bakugou as soon as they get Midoriya fully inside because like. He’s inside. That’s how long Kirishima said it needed to be a secret for. That has passed.

And frankly the tension has been suffocating. Todoroki is radiating gay depression and Kaminari cannot do it anymore. Don’t even get him started on Bakugou. He loves the dude but he’s never met anyone less equipped to handle his own emotions like Jesus Christ

Todoroki, getting this text: *takes off at a dead fucking sprint*

Bakugou, who lives like one of those moms that leave their phone on the charger in another room and just roams life without it, doesn’t have his phone: what the fuck??

Todoroki, not bothering with shoes: MIDORIYAS BACK AND HES IN CONTROL OF HIS BODY

Bakugou, tripping to follow him: wait FUCK WHAT

Kaminari also does this because Midoriya immediately takes the fuck off at a dead fucking sprint the second the gate closes behind him and he is not headed for the dorms. Where is he going actually. Fuck.

Izuku has a limited amount of time he is working with. He has no idea what he was shot with. He suspects it may have hit him in the ass, because. Ow. But he doesn’t know what happens when it wear off, or if it’s going to wear off, or how long this kind of drug is expected to last for. If this is permanent and all of the past users are just gone, all for one may try to actually end the world and they don’t have one for all to fight him with anymore, in which case they’re all fucked. So Izuku is going to be operating as if one for all is coming back and stacking his deck for that possibility.

He knows what he needs to do

He has not been conscious for god knows how long and he likely will fall back to unconsciousness soon

He has potentially a very limited time he is working with and he needs to prioritize how he uses it. And Izuku knows that if he can only talk to one person before he goes back under, there is only one person that it should be.

And that person is

Shinsou Hitoshi

While Iida has not taken Izuku’s loss in quite the same way Todoroki or Bakugou has, he has still taken it very badly, and he is not about to let his dear friend just go off alone. Where. Where is he going.

Huh. Izuku has no idea. He was just in the moment. He has no idea what day it is. Do they have classes like are classes a thing today. Why is it cold out now. He thought it was July.

Anyway he needs Shinsou Hitoshi, general education student, right fucking now. Where can he find him. Please tell him it is still on this campus he has such limited fucking time, maybe, probably, he thinks.

Likely he would be in the gen ed dorms. Iida will take him there while impressing upon him just how much he’s missed him. He feels he will not get much of an opportunity after Bakugou and Todoroki arrive.

Todoroki, reading Kaminari’s live text of what’s happening: they’re going to the gen ed dorms now??

Bakugou, slamming into his back: fuck WHY

Iida also would like to know that. He has no idea why Shinsou is the one person on this campus Izuku wishes to speak with, particularly considering how fervently certain other people wish to speak with Izuku. He has spent too much time with Todoroki lately, admittedly trying to ease some of the gay anguish he’s experiencing, and because of that he immediately starts worrying that there’s some kind of clandestine romance that happened between Shinsou and Midoriya before all this and Midoriya is seeking his paramour. He is worried specifically because 1) Midoriya is his friend and if he had some kind of partner who was left bereft Iida would have liked to be there for him and 2) he cannot put into mortal words how cataclysmic of a breakdown Todoroki will have at this revelation.

But no. Shinsou has not spoken to Midoriya since that guy judo flipped him on live tv, thereby crushing his hopes and dreams. He does feel bad for him, because his life seems to have since become fucked in a kind of way that may legitimately be unprecedented in human history. But it’s not his business. He’s like, possessed or something now. And even if he wasn’t possessed there is no reason why Midoriya would ever seek him out specifically.

So there he is in his dorm room. Unproblematic. Moisturized. In his lane.

Midoriya Izuku bursts into his dorm room with an air of wild desperation and an entourage

Shinsou, was not expecting this: I… knock??

Izuku, has had a long… however long it’s been: I—sorry.

Shinsou: it’s fine. *beat* I thought you were possessed.

Izuku, Exuding An Energy: the last I remember it was July and. I don’t think I owned these pants.

Shinsou: it’s November

Izuku, was hoping for a mid September at worst: I—November??

Shinsou: yeah. You uh. You just. Done with that possession thing now?

No. Izuku doesn’t think so. He thinks it’s going to happen again, in an indeterminate amount of time but likely very soon.

He cannot explain further. Todoroki and Bakugou barrel into Shinsou’s room like heralds of the end times. Oh, look. More company.

The energy just gets weird fucking fast. It’s kind of gay. And if it is like, whatever, good for them, but like. Why is it happening in Shinsou’s room. Specifically. They have their own rooms to be gay in. He feels like his room is out of their way. And also it’s sort of attracting a crowd, and he has homework, and also he still has no idea why the fuck Izuku’s here…

Fuck. It is attracting a crowd. Bakugou did not wait for anyone to open the door for him and blasted the electronic lock. That would attract attention without the everything else. Everyone’s wondering what the fuck is happening over there. They thought Midoriya was possessed and like, doing some kind of guerrilla warfare vigilante thing. It made the news.

Izuku is worried now. All for One’s a complete freak who will show up here if someone goes and posts this shit online.

Bakugou acts decisively.

Everyone give him their phone because he is blowing them up. Anyone who posts this shit online or tells anyone is getting an explosion up their ass. No the phone thing is non optional he trusts none of them do not think you can hide from him

Shinsou just. Would love to know why this is happening to him. Specifically. In his room.

Okay. Fuck. Izuku has someone else stuck running his body right now, and Izuku's just… buried beneath most of the time. Right now he’s back in control, but he’s positive it’s temporary. Mostly. Like 60%. he is aware that's not very positive. Whatever. He needs to assume that this is a problem that still needs to be fixed and plan accordingly.

And the way to fix this involves Shinsou.

He’s not going to lie to him. First’s brother is a freak. If he finds out that Shinsou is helping Izuku get his body back, he may go after him. It may be dangerous. All for One may actually try to kill him if he finds out. But Shinsou said he wanted to be a hero and Izuku needs one.

He needs Shinsou to help save him. Will he?

And like. Shinsou’s not saying he’s thought this about Midoriya specifically. But he’d been lying if he said he’s never fantasized about someone bursting into his room and telling him that they need a hero and it needs to be him, that he’s got some special nebulous something that means he’s the only one who can save them. He wants to be a hero like he needs to breathe. It’s existential.

Midoriya’s offering him a hand, and he takes it.

Iida insists that they should take this back to their dorm. Izuku registers, for the first time, that they have dorms now. When. When did that happen. This is a new building entirely that he's standing in. Oh god it’s November. Like. From his perspective it feels like it’s been years so in a way that’s better but. Fuck he lost so much time.

They need to get Midoriya back across campus without risking more attention. Bakugou has already destroyed a terrifying number of cellphones and also this dorm’s WiFi router. Iida expects a lecture from Mr. Aizawa and possibly Nedzu imminently. Perhaps a disguise is in order instead of… fire and violence? Something to cover his hair and features. They’ve already garnered too much attention.

For some reason both Bakugou and Todoroki interpret this to mean that they specifically should take off their hoodies and try to physically put them on Midoriya.

Midoriya does not have time for this. he has Shinsou and he needs to get to the next phase of his plan let’s go let’s go

They spirit back to the class 1-a dorms. Todoroki has latched onto Izuku’s hand like he’s scared he will take off at any second. Izuku, upon review, realizes this seems to be a common theme in people’s responses to him thus far. This does not surprise him. Third was emphatic that First must be having a legendary crash out right now.

They get to the dorms. Aizawa, Nighteye, Kirishima, Uraraka, Tsuyu, and Mirio have made it back from the scene of the raid. Nighteye saw that this would be where Midoriya ended up, and also the group chat has been popping off. Kirishima knows exactly where his homeboy is. Kaminari has been living texting it. All Mights there too. Nighteye called him, and also half of class 1a frantically texted him to tell him that their boy was back. Class 1a is ready to dogpile Izuku with love and relief.

But Izuku does not have time for any of that shit.

Or maybe he does. He doesn’t know how long he’s back for and is not willing to risk it. Everyone shut up and be happy to see him later—he needs a phone, duct tape, and a permanent marker fucking now.

He sees Uraraka go for her phone. He quickly clarifies he needs a phone he can keep because he needs to duct tape it to his body so First is certain to get it. He needs to record a message to him and he cannot guarantee that they will get the phone back.

He can have todoroki’s phone. And also his dad’s credit card. Just in case he needs it. Todoroki is a provider if that matters.

That’s… Okay. Fine. Thanks. He doesn’t know if this is permanent or how long it lasts if it’s temporary. He doesn’t know when first is coming back.

Mirio explains that there were definitely permanent kinds of those bullets, good thing no one got tragically hit with one in battle, unless Midoriya did, in which case yikes. But if it was the temporary kind then Tamaki got hit with one and his quirk was back like ten hours later. So he probably has time?

But Izuku doesn’t know that. What determines the duration of the drug? Is it the same for everyone? Is it different based on body weight? Metabolism speed? Quirk power? Is it a shitty yakuza drug so they’ve probably not made a standardized formula/dosage per bullet and its expected effects may therefore vary? For all he knows he has seconds someone film him

Izuku explains it all to first. One for All is so much more than they thought. It’s stockpiling in its purest form, and they’re all in there, everything’s still in there. Every memory, every feeling, every user.

Kudou’s in there. First should know that.

He thinks they’re sentient Quirk manifestations. Perfect copies of who they were in life. He’s telling himself that at least because he’s haunted by the metaphysical implications of it being actually them trapped in there. Like do they all have souls and are those souls trapped inside Izuku’s bones. Have they inadvertently locked themselves out of the afterlife and will they all be trapped in the purgatory in miniature existing inside Izuku until they stop passing along one for all. Like flies stuck in a glue trap but for human souls. He just. He would rather they be sentient quirk copies instead of like actual ghosts. He’s. He’s getting off topic.

He knows how All for One did it. He figured out what Quirk he used to switch them out, and it was one for all. He used a Quirk that let him momentarily take control of it, and he manipulated it to swap out Izuku for First. And if All for One can use One for all to do that, then they can use it to reverse it. And he and the rest have been trying to figure out how.

But it’s difficult. They can navigate one for all from the inside, but they can’t activate it. First can activate it from the outside, but he can’t navigate its depths. And they can’t communicate across the divide. The others apparently thought they were getting close to reaching Izuku through his dreams before this all happened, but first was really the best at that… and also they’re all pretty sure First hasn’t really been sleeping much so it’s been hard to find opportunities to try to reach him that way.

One for All is like an ocean of information, and they’re trying to figure out how to manipulate it in the right way to force the right information to surface. But it’s got all of these different levels beneath the surface that are easy to get lost in. It’s almost impossible to get everyone all on the same level where they can work together to operate the quirk.

But there’s an exception. There is one time where they’ve all been on the same level of awareness within one for all. And there’s one time that they’ve managed to activate it from the inside. First managed to activate it from the inside.

And it was when Shinsou Hitoshi put them under during the sports festival.

First reached out. He triggered their quirk and knocked Izuku out from hypnosis. And that’s the only time any of them have been able to manage something like that.

For some reason, Shinsou quirk forces them all onto the exact same plane of awareness within one for all. They can see each other. He thinks they may be able to interact if he stays under long enough. And it may let them activate it from the inside. After First is back, he needs to find Shinsou—uhh, this is Shinsou, point the camera at Shinsou—

(Shinsou, wide eyed, also there: •_•)

Find Shinsou and have him put him under. Then they can all work together to reverse this. Shinsou’s cool and is going to be a hero and said he’d help them. Izuku is writing Shinsou’s cellphone number on his arm in permanent marker. Call him and they can go from there.

Aizawa can’t help but cut in. Because Midoriya’s really preparing like First is just not gonna be there after the drug wears off. They can arrange for first to speak with Shinsou. And that. Doesn’t involve leaving Shinsou’s number in permanent marker on the arm of someone being hunted by a murderous freak. Which could be. Dangerous for shinsou.

And like. Izuku guesses but also isn’t it sort of safer this way? Not for shinsou—sorry shinsou—but like to make sure first gets the information. He may just fuck off when he wakes up and like. Then they’re back at square one. Hence duct taping phones to his body and writing Shinsou’s number on his mortal body in black sharpie. But maybe he can do it on like, his stomach or something? He feels like that’d be more reliably hidden than the arm. And ergo safer for shinsou.

And there’s some awkward eye contact exchanged amongst the adults.

Because the plan was to sort of ensure first couldn’t do that when and if he woke up.

And they sort of assumed Midoriya would be okay with that. And like. Cooperate in making sure that happened. They were sort of going to ask him to just wait to switch back with first in a nice and comfortable but very very locked holding cell because they have not been able to get first to listen to them otherwise and they can’t have him carrying on the way he is

First has been fucking off, homeless and unhinged, and fighting everyone he possibly can. In Midoriya’s body. He risks getting caught by all for one. He risks getting seriously hurt or killed, and if he gets killed then all for one may try to sink japan into the fucking sea. They have been trying to do everything short of capturing him in a net for Midoriya’s and society’s sake, because everyone is so so distressed by whatever the fuck he’s doing.

Izuku doesn’t get it. The only way they’d be able to stop him is by not letting him leave, possibly by locking him in some kind of locked room and/or vault, which, as everyone knows, is one of the worst and most fucked up things you can do to another person.

Have they. Have they been trying to do that to first.

They are not monsters for trying to get First to stop fucking off into the night and stay in a nice safe house where he’d be protected—

And oh my god, Izuku is so fucking sorry to first. He is horrified right now. Aghast. He cannot believe they are acting like this and he, too, thinks they are monsters for it. He is behind first 100%. He gives first his blessing to fuck off and do whatever he thinks is right. Izuku’s body is his body. Izuku trusts him completely so lock in, do what he needs to, go plus ultra

Aizawa needs Midoriya to stop encouraging First, please.

Izuku stares at him a beat.

Honestly he may just write Shinsou’s number on his body and let them just take it from here (shinsou do NOT tell them if first calls do not—)

izuku is emphatic that First needs to be allowed to come and go as he pleases. It’s actually so fucked up that they considered not letting him do that. As everyone knows, forcing someone to stay in a place is one of the most fucked up things you can do to a person.

Izuku may or may not share a lot of First’s skittishness around vaulting now.

He remembers being in the vault, is the thing. He thinks he was only like, actually experiencing the vault for a very short period of time, the memory he slipped into probably lasted for under an hour, but that wasn’t just a short memory of being in the vault. It was a memory of being in the vault after having already been in it for years.

It was. Uh. Izuku’s trying it to think about it, actually. But it wasn’t good.

If First has been running from them, that is on them. It is very normal to fuck off at first signs of confinement. He can’t believe they’re being like this. First, don’t you worry, man, Izuku gives him full permission to use his body to bite his loved ones if needs must. Izuku would do the same and may still if they don’t stop being so unreasonable about this.

Aizawa is getting the sense that something deeper is going on.

Okay. They need First to start working with them and stop doing… whatever it is that he’s doing. Like. Is this like a test or something? If they give First the ability to leave freely will he decide to stay and work with them because he just wanted the option?

And Izuku is like. No. Don’t be ridiculous. He’s going to leave. He’s going to do things while he’s gone. He will not tell them in advance what those things are. Izuku thinks they should simply let him.

Aizawa is taking deep breaths.

If it makes them feel better, he’ll probably come back and cooperate more if they weren’t trying to keep him locked up? But like. They cannot try to lock him up. He will be gone. They will not find him. God someone hand him the duct tape he needs to strap this recording to his thigh before he goes under again and they drive away first with how insane they’re being.

Okay. Okay. They come to a compromise. It’s less of a compromise and more of Izuku saying that they can go ahead and try that idea and see how badly First bites them over it.

They can’t just let First fuck off the second he returns. He’s going to try, but they need to talk to him first. They can’t just let him go off into the streets with Shinsou’s phone number written on him in sharpie and Todoroki’s phone strapped to him with duct tape. And. Endeavor’s credit card. So they can try to confine him just long enough to have the initial conversation, with the caveat that they absolutely must let him go after. Izuku is emphatic that long term restraint is not a fucking option, to the degree where Aizawa thinks he may genuinely try to run himself to save First the trouble.

Something’s definitely up with that.

Izuku doesn’t think this is going to go well. But hey. They want to try. And he can probably help them talk First down? Like. Getting Izuku back is as simple as getting Mr. Aizawa to erase his Quir—

Todoroki, who wanted to try that literally months ago: OKAY. OKAY.

He is not taking this with grace. He had that idea the night this shit started. He could have had Midoriya back months ago. He means they. They could have had Midoriya back months ago. This was equally important to all of them for all the same reasons.

Okay. Obviously, this Quirk didn’t work the way anyone thought it would. And Mr. Aizawa erasing him isn’t a permanent fix, so in a way they were both right—

But they weren’t. Todoroki was right. He is not accepting criticism at this time. They could have been doing this shit months ago he is so unspeakably upset right now

Anyway, that’s all Izuku really had to say. Though, uh.

First should know that Second is so fucking sad without him. Everyone thinks so. He misses him so, so much. And he’s waiting for him, okay? He’s not gone.

And that’s it. Izuku has conveyed the necessary messages. He has written Shinsou’s number on him in sharpie. Phone? Duct taped beneath his shirt. He has done it.

Izuku is still here.

So admittedly it seems that he does have time before the drug wears off so like. Uh. How’s everyone been?

He gets tackled.

It’s chaos, for a bit. Everyone’s hugging him, talking over him, crying. He was missed. He was loved. He was so, so loved.

Todoroki is holding both of his hands in his own. He is staring soulfully into Izuku’s eyes. Izuku can’t remember how this came to be. He doesn’t think he minds, though.

Iida and Uraraka are also holding hands. This is it. Confession time. The moment they’ve been waiting for it. They’ve been helping Todoroki through his homosexuality induced anguish because they’re friends, but also fucksake it’s agonizing. He’s so sad and gay that it’s hard to tolerate. Hes been impossible to deal with since the failed sleeping beauty attempt and now finally, finally he can tell Izuku how he feels

Todoroki says: “I’m… glad you’ve gotten a break from your possession.”

Izuku smiles at him sunnily. He is too.

Iida, in the distance: IS THAT IT

In the chaos of the crowd, Shinsou gets jostled up to the front. He catches Izuku’s eye. He feels like he should say something because like, everyone is, but also what the fuck would he say to him. They talked one time and it involved Izuku judo flipping him on live tv. Shinsou wasn’t exactly personally affected by his loss.

Shinsou says: “I feel like having outside help from a ghost should be grounds for disqualification from the sports festival”

Which he immediately regrets. But Izuku laughs, so he guesses it’s okay.

It starts to dwindle pretty quickly. This is not by choice from the rest of the class. They want to all hold hands in a massive class daisy chain. But they legitimately have no idea when the fuck First is coming back, if he is at all. But he has responded to having to exist near them with indiscriminate violence thus far, and they can’t have that happening in the middle of the common area.

Izuku is not surprised by this. This is probably their fault. If they were trying to keep him locked up, then First’s reaction is on them.

First is also likely to lose his entire shit because he is In A Place now. This is a very understandable reaction to Being In A Place. Izuku would and has done the same, re: chisaki’s fingers. They should all make sure to not be within biting distance.

Aizawa, growing increasingly concerned: Midoriya do we need to talk about something

Izuku: no why

Anyway, the more time passes, the more pressing the need to get him in a more controlled environment. He should stay in his dorm room for the next few hours. Aizawa will stay with him so First doesn’t immediately punch through a wall and fuck off into the night. Yagi will also stay with him because he’s still emotionally fragile at the idea of losing Izuku again. Either his Quirk will come back and they talk to First, or his Quirk comes back and this was the metaphysical equivalent of turning his Quirk off and back on again to reset it so he’s just back now, or his Quirk doesn’t come back and they start making plans for handling the fallout.

Huh. Izuku has a dorm room?

Yes, yes he does. The class decorated it for him. They refused to accept that Izuku was not coming back and decided to make sure his room was ready for him. They really put their hearts into the design.

The room looks like all might merch store meets hot topic meets a boxing gym meets a supply closet meets an open jar of glitter. And there’s a photo of the class, all of them, printed and framed at the head of his bed.

Izuku loves it immensely. He bursts into tears when he walks in the door.

During this time, he’s still here, and people can talk to him. They’re just trying to make sure he’s in a more enclosed space with less. Potential victims. If first comes back.

Iida, looming over Todoroki: is there something you wish to tell Izuku before he is possessed again

Todoroki isn’t sure.

(Uraraka: HOW COULD YOU NOT BE SURE)

He promised himself he’d tell Izuku how he felt as soon as he got him back. He didn’t tell him the first time around and he almost lost the chance for good. He promised himself he’d not make the same mistake again.

But he also sort of thought he’d get Izuku back for good. He thought that the next time he was in control of his body, this possession mess would be resolved.

Izuku’s very likely going to go back under soon. He’s going to be just. Stuck inside his own body unable to act on anything. Wouldn’t it be a lot to put his feelings on someone before that? Like what is he supposed to do, say, “I don’t want to be just friends, I want more, I want it so bad that being without you has been an agony i never want to go through again. Also I sleeping beautied you and it failed. Don’t look into that too much. Anywho just wanted to let you know, let’s put a pin in this until you become un-possessed”? Maybe he should wait.

Bakugou does not have the same dilemma. Out of his way, gay boy, he’s got an emotional resolution to make happen.

Izuku does not know why Bakugou is here asking to speak to him privately. And he does not know what to do with it when he finds out why.

They spend a lot of the conversation just missing each other. Bakugou tries to apologize, tries to set it all out, how all of this came together to him being so fucking sorry for everything that happened between them. Izuku doesn’t get what he’s talking about. He doesn’t have to be sorry about Izuku getting possessed—Izuku can confirm that there’s nothing Bakugou could have done to stop all for one—

It’s not. It’s not that exactly. That’s part of it. But it’s not that.

The Bakugou everyone pretended he was growing up should have been able to stop it.

The Bakugou everyone pretended he was growing up wouldn’t have been there to begin with, because no one would have questioned his heroic potential. He’d never have been called a villain and never been kidnapped as a fuckin. Evil recruitment drive.

But if he was there, then he’d have stopped it. He’d have done something spectacular and stopped it. It was metaphysical to that Bakugou, the imaginary one. He never failed. He always won. He was assured to be the one who would save the day before it was ever in trouble to begin with. He was guaranteed to be right, to be victorious, to be a hero.

Even though he wasnt doing anything that could be called heroic back then.

If he couldn’t save Izuku, that means that Bakugou didn’t exist. He wasn’t real. He never had been. And that means that all that, that shit Bakugou put him through when they were kids was just. Him being a piece of shit. Because if he wasn’t somehow inherently good and right and already a perfect hero—

Then he was just an asshole.

And he’s sorry. He’s so fucking sorry. And he’s been trying to fix things. He’s been trying to be better. He’s trying to be the kind of hero that Izuku used to think he’d be, back when they were kids and before it all got fucked between them. He thinks that’s the kind of hero he wants to be.

Izuku just sort of sits there. He doesn’t know how to respond.

He’s not sure how he would have taken this before everything. But it’s not as easy deciding now. Because he’s got so many of First’s memories clanging around his head. And First wouldn’t have taken this well.

It’s not about Bakugou. It’s about the sheer mind fuckery of being in any kind of relationship with All for One. And All for One wouldn’t exactly apologize, per se, but he would try to… smooth things over? He’d do something incredibly fucked and then suddenly he’d do something to emphasize how he loved First and how First was his absolute priority. And then he’d start like. Manufacturing ways to smooth things over. In ways that were profoundly fucked. First was convinced that his brother was drugging him, before the vault, before the first time he ran, when they just lived together in a house. First was arguing with him constantly about what was happening between them, how controlling his brother was becoming, about what he suspected his brother was doing in his “work.” Then, suddenly he started having dizzy spells and blacking out. And there was hero big brother, so goddamn concerned for him, swooping in to catch him when he started to stumble, confining him to bedrest, calling for that dumb fucking weasel of a doctor who diagnosed first with a mystery condition that required him to avoid getting upset. And any time First tried to talk to All for One about anything after that, it devolved into All for One harping on about his health and how much he cares for First and how all for one would do anything to keep him healthy and safe so just leave everything to him and stop worrying so much. And stop upsetting himself. Remember what the doctor said.

Izuku knows Bakugou’s not doing what all for one did to first. It’s not even in the same universe. But First was just really, really terrified of relationships and trusting people in general, especially when there’s been issues in the past. People promising him that things would change between them and it’d be better usually preceded a lot of agony. And Izuku’s got just. Pieces of First jumbled in with himself that are hard to separate out from the rest.

It was easy to say things. And it’s easy to not mean them. He hasn’t been here to see if things are different or if Bakugou’s sorry but not enough to change anything. Like. He’s glad Bakugou’s working through things but he doesn’t know what that means for him.

Bakugou stares at him for a long time. Then, he decides, he's going to show Izuku. He's going to prove it to him. Izuku's going to get his body back and he'll see. Bakugou’s going to be the kind of hero they dreamed of as kids. And then. Then maybe things can be different between them.

Aizawa and Yagi, standing outside the door, trying desperately not to eavesdrop: •_• •_•

They know when First comes back because Izuku goes from talking normally with them to rag dolling onto his own bed. Instinctively, Yagi rushes over to help him... only for First to immediately lock in and head butt him.

It then took them seventeen tries to get First to stop fighting long enough to listen.

It could be said that First has what the kids nowadays are calling "trauma." But First likes to call them survival instincts. It's kind of like how it's not paranoia if they're actually out to get you--it's not a complex trauma response if it's really a measured reaction given the probable circumstances.

He's got this entire thing about beds and specifically about waking up in them that he just. He doesn't like to talk about. Which is frankly true of most of his survival instincts. He hates to admit why he has them because then people look at him with those big sad pity eyes and he just. he hates it.

Being in a bed has usually been. bad. for first. specifically.

He grew up in an orphanage that just didn't really give them beds. they got like, army cots. the bouncy kind, that were more fabric on a frame than anything. But then his brother came and got him and he just started like. waking up places. beds, specifically. His brother never really got how unsettling it was for First to just wake up In A Place because he was a kidnapping piece of shit who had a fundamental inability to grasp personal boundaries. And then he got into that phase where First was pretty positive his brother was drugging him and it was just. frequent. He'd be doing something and then he'd get dizzy and then he'd just. be in a bed.

and it would have happened again. And he would never know what happened to him while he was out.

And then First was homeless and on the run for a bit and like. You don't have easy access to beds when you're homeless and on the run. no beds involved. he knows he's waking up a free man when he's waking up Not In A Bed.

and then his brother caught him. and he woke up in a bed. tied down to it. in a vault.

and then he stayed there. for a very long time.

And after that his brother just got really into tying first to beds. like he "lost bed privileges" or whatever because he wouldn't love his fuckass brother and also kept trying to kill himself with any possible object available to him so he usually didn't have one but his brother would make an exception when First had gotten sick or managed to hurt himself. his brother hated it when he got sick or managed to hurt himself because it reminded him that first may actually die one day and he usually liked to foreclose any possibility of first's condition getting worse and of course first was actively trying to make his own condition worse and all for one knew that and. well by the time they got to the vault point his brother decided that first needed to be fully restrained whenever he was sick or injured. First couldn't try to hurt himself then. He couldn't try to rip out whatever IV or feeding tube or stitches he ended up with that time. and he couldn't resist his own treatment. his brother thought it was an all around excellent solution.

Meanwhile first counts it among the top five reasons he occasionally suspected he had died and been sent to actual hell? the only thing worse than being stuck in a single boring fucking room for all eternity was also being completely unable to move while you're in there. he just. he always sort of associated it with those times he fucked around and unlocked a worse, more agonizing hell than his everyday.

First's life had taught him the importance of immediate and decisive action. He feels a bed under him, decides that's probably bad for him, and then resorts to blind violence with the ultimate hopes of bursting through the wall like the fucking kool aid man and fucking off into the night.

Aizawa keeps having to erase him to prevent this.

Izuku feels like he is stuck in a zoetrope where the characters become increasingly disheveled with each frame.

Aizawa, bleeding slightly, appears to have been bitten: this isn't working

Izuku: don't take this the wrong way but i feel like you're not even trying

Aizawa: *stares*

Izuku: we could always just--

Aizawa: we cannot just have him fuck off into the night with shinsou's phone number written on him in permanent marker and hope for the best

Izuku: *shrugs* then you need to stay out of biting range

In the end, Second has to intervene.

He grows. increasingly frustrated. none of them really realize when one for all is erased because it's just brief non-existence. they don't even feel themselves leaving existence, it's too immediate. The only reason why they know something is going on is because Nine is telling them. So he has nine telling them, from his perspective, “okay yeah they failed again. Again. Failed again. again. Oooohh I think first managed to bite mr. Aizawa that time. Again. Again. Agai—”

Second feels once you hit double digit failures you should reevaluate a course of action. But that’s just him.

He’s been struggling with a very overwhelming sense of helplessness this entire time. All of the Past Users love First and are enraged by his brother’s newest way of fucking with him, but Second knows, with unique intimacy, just how badly this must be affecting first. It’s like All for One frankensteined together all of his husband's worst nightmares to invent a new level of hell to force him through.

Like. Confirmation that not even the veil of death will keep his brother away from him? Check. All of his loved ones being dead by centuries so he has no hope that they're out there surviving somehow? Yep. Other people's lives being destroyed directly so his brother can gain access to him? Yes. Threats of vaulting? imminent.

But First also had all of these issues around bodily autonomy that Second suspects has been aggravated to no end. His brother treated him like a fucking knickknack that he could tote around as he pleased. He has a profound fear related to things happening to his body while he's unaware. There were innumerable times in his husband's life where he woke up in a new place or with the realization that something had been done to his body while he was asleep. his clothes will have been changed or something will be obviously different. and he'd never know what exactly happened while he was out. So he imagines people repeatedly knocking him in and out of consciousness in an attempt to confine him is probably making him less likely to listen to these people with every single attempt.

He is not doing this to help those idiots. He feels that letting first fuck off into the night with a teenager's phone number written on him and endeavor's credit card was a fine plan. But they've apparently set themselves to this task and will not abandon it despite all indications that they should.

Second is willing to give… advice about how to calm First down when he’s panicking while waking. But if this information gets back to All for One and becomes another thing he can use against First, Second will find a way to crawl out of Nine’s bones and shoot them in both knees. Convey that message exactly.

(Fifth: yeahhhh second i bet you advice on how to wake up your husband—)

Not. This time.

Second has been on the receiving end of a lot of loving ribbing about his marriage with First since the news broke. It’s frankly fair game. It is the Past Users’ god-given right to dogpile him for carrying on some kind of Austen love affair for two hundred years right beneath their noses. They’ve all been subject to his and First’s repressed fucking stolen glances and always disappearing at the same time and have earned the right to tease them. First had more of an “outwardly friendly but also you could not waterboard information about his past out of him” demeanor with the rest but Second’s all about presenting as a stone cold soldier. Finding out he has in fact been sappy with his husband this entire time is the hottest tea that’s dropped in decades and frankly there’s not a lot going on in any of their lives/deaths, they are ghosts in a child’s bones. Their entire social calendar is each other and only expands when someone new dies, bitter and unfulfilled. The closest thing they get to new gossip is spying on literal school yard drama because Nine is like. Eleven years old. They at least used to have all might’s whore escapades and now they have the Disney channel running on endless loop, if Disney channel had the occasional attempted murder. This is the greatest thing to happen to them in fucking ages and the only thing dampening the revelation is, you know, first being gone.

Second can put up with their teasing. Most of the time. But not this time. he is boiling in his own misery without First and frankly could not possibly be more anxious about all this.

Like. He genuinely does love his husband. He loves him in the sappy, existential, sun-moon-and-stars, saccharine romance novel kind of way. He will not admit it out loud, but he does. They weren’t overt about their relationship but they were sincere in it. He doesn’t know if there’s an afterlife beyond one for all, but he’s grateful that they got a second chance within it. They didn’t have enough time in life. They’ve had two hundred years together in one for all, but it still isn’t enough time for him. He misses First like a limb.

And at least in life he knew that if First’s bitch of a brother ever succeeded in taking First back… well, he’d either be too dead to know about it or he’d be alive and then. Then he’d have a chance to get him back. It was so far from what he wanted to happen. First had been enormously clear with him how badly he wanted to die before ever going back to that place. He begged Second to let him die before being recaptured, even if there was some hope of rescue.

That was how he ended up in that hellhole to begin with. His friend hadn’t wanted him to die, and thought she could rescue him from his brother after he was healed. She told him it’d just be for a bit. She’d come for him. And then she died and he woke up in the vault. He couldn’t do it a second time. He made Second promise.

But the possibility of all for one recapturing him despite their best efforts lingered over them. And Second knew it would be agony if it ever happened—but he’d only ever considered the two possibilities if it came to pass. He’d either be dead and unaware or alive and able to do something. He never imagined being just. Stuck and helpless like this. Especially with how dedicated all for one is to forcing first to live forever. He’s helpless and faced with a potentially permanent loss.

It’s eating at him, especially now. Because he knows that Nine’s teacher probably views this as a profoundly aggravating road block to getting his student’s body back. But for Second, this represents yet another moment that’s going to dig into all the places First is hurt and First isn’t going to tell a single person about it, because Second was the person he’d talk to about it. Second’s drowning in quiet, repressed concern and is just. At the end of his rope. They will not be discussing what he’s about to say.

Izuku: okay second has some advice you’re gonna need some paper and a pen

Aizawa, exhausted, bewildered, bitten: why

Izuku: he has something you should say to first but he doesn’t want you saying it

Aizawa: … why.

Izuku: uhhhh I think it’s for gay reasons honestly.

Aizawa, despairing: what

Izuku: yeah they were like. Super married and grossly in love in life. Don’t ever mention that I told you any of that because second can’t hear us while he’s erased but he’ll find out if you bring it up later. He said he’s not accepting questions and not explaining we just have to do what he says. Also if all for one finds out about this he’s going to find a way to shoot you and like. Honestly I think it means I have to shoot you on his behalf which like. I don’t want to shoot you sensei

Aizawa, staring at the ceiling: … so this will calm him down

Izuku: oh no haha. if anything he’ll get angrier

Aizawa:

Izuku: second says that first is going to assume that you used a mind reading quirk or something to get this information and get even more violent over it. He recommends having distance and possibly a shield. It’s going to stun him before he gets angry though and that’s the opportunity we’re gunning for. He says to shout very loudly while he’s still processing that you got into contact with me and that I told you this and let my video explain because he’s going to be too angry to talk to you but he’ll want to talk to me. Also emphasize he can leave after the video

Aizawa:

Aizawa: okay fine

First is incredibly stressed. These fuckers apparently have some kind of Quirk that makes him lose time. He keeps waking up to them Over Him trying to calm him down which is, of course, making him panic so much harder. But every time he tries to get out of here and out of range of whatever Quirk is doing this, it’s like he blinks and he’s back where he’s started. It’s sort of nightmare fuel for him.

Except this next time he wakes up and he’s facing some random piece of paper that reads You’re right here with me

First bluescreens for a moment.

Because the only person who used to say that was Second when First woke up from some nightmare and was too disoriented to remember where he was. He’d assume he was In A Place and freak out because if he’s suddenly In A Place then his brother put him there. He’d always snap out of it when he realized he was still with the resistance, and Second always said the same thing every time, but the only one who knew that was him and he’s dead

Which makes First conclude these fuckers got a psychic quirk and are using the memory of his dead husband against him. In which case he’s punching them in the fucking throat.

Aizawa, from behind the door, shouts to him that Izuku gave him that message. He got it from someone else and Aizawa cannot emphasize enough that he does not know what it means or why it matters. One for All was temporarily erased and Izuku came back. They’re just trying to give him a video from Izuku to explain everything and then First can go.

Normally First would fuck off anyway. Assuring him he can leave and then using his hesitation to trap him is the exact sort of shit he’s usually wary of.

But the message gives him pause.

He wants so badly for it to actually be from Second. And he’s wanted to talk to Izuku since this started. He’s wanted to tell him how sorry he is. So if there’s a chance—

Fine. Kick the phone to him.

Wha—he has it? It’s duct taped to him? He thought that was his gun. Well not his gun gun, his die hard gun. Secret backup duct tape gun. Oh god his gun gun is gone too. Okay fine he’ll watch it.

Aizawa has never seen First more quiet or still than when he watches Izuku’s video to him.

He’s been chasing First, just like all the rest. First has been closed off and uncooperative since the very first day. He usually figures out Aizawa is on his tail and loses him before Aizawa can get close. He’s apparently been more cooperative with Yagi, but not enough to allow Yagi to bring him in. And Yagi claims he always takes off too soon to press the matter. And he refuses to share how First has been getting in contact with him to begin with because he’s trying to get Izuku back and he doesn’t want to endanger the contact and. Anyway Aizawa has never had any kind of experience with First that didn’t involve him aggravated and/or violent.

When the video finishes, he sits there for a long time. He doesn’t move. He just stares. And then he asks if he can send a message back. Aizawa says yes. He can record his own video and Aizawa can erase him long enough for Izuku to watch it and reply.

The only thing First asks is if Kudou’s really in there.

First doesn’t remember that. He doesn’t remember—he doesn’t know, being a ghost living on inside the other users. Is it—does Izuku just mean he’s been going through memories of them? Or is it. Is there. He needs Izuku to be sure.

He blinks. There’s a reply in his hands.

And Izuku’s like. Oh no, everyone’s really in here. He’s really hoping it’s like, a sentient Quirk manifestation thing, which like. If that’s the case First himself is a sentient Quirk mutation, not sure how First feels about that. Izuku’s really grappled with what a human soul is and whether he’s got seven adult ghosts shuttered away from the light of god within him so like. Sentient Quirk manifestation feels better to him but it may not to First. Or maybe it does. But Second is still around to the same extent that First is. And he’s definitely independent from memories. He’s new and changing, but memories of him aren’t. Also Second wants it to be clear that he only helped these—sorry Mr. Aizawa it’s his words not Izuku’s—bozos so they’d stop blacking First out.

Oh and First should know that Third found out that he and Second got married and kept it secret for like two hundred years and he told literally everyone. He says it’s revenge for not inviting him to the wedding. The past users are planning to subject the two of them to the most obnoxious do over wedding when first is back. Fifth called dibs on flower girl, it’s gonna be a whole thing. It is 100% mandatory seven’s gonna hunt him through Izuku’s bones if he tries to evade.

First looks like he got punched in the face.

Aizawa can’t really tell what he’s thinking. First just sits there, looking stunned. He sends back a message.

Third? Who’s third?

Oh, Bruce. Sorry, everyone calls each other by their numbers, except for Second and Third, since they knew each other in life. And probably First too, since he knew them. Izuku’s not sure why the rest use numbers, come to think of it. Third actually asked Izuku to pass on a message after the last one—he knows first is probably going to crash out after hearing that there’s like, a bunch of ghost time he apparently doesn’t remember. He is convinced that First will remember everything once they get him back in here. One for All saves literally everything. Even if it’s not automatic restoration, they’ll figure out how to get the memories back. So don’t worry, because they’ve got his back. Just like they always said, yeah?

First struggles more visibly than Aizawa’s ever seen.

His voice cracks when he replies. The only thing he says is “I did this to Bruce too?”

First sort of suspected it? Bruce was the only one he could imagine Kudou trusting with the fight against all for one. But it’s different to know it. To get confirmation that this fucking fight killed his husband and went on to kill their best friend and he’s still stuck dealing with First’s brother’s bullshit two hundred years later.

First would never admit this out loud, but he’s always sort of felt like knowing him is the worst thing to happen to most people. And it seems to be true for Bruce.

Izuku feels like this is one of those things he needs to immediately confer with Third over. A moment.

Third says that the way the question implies First somehow feels guilty or at fault for this and he shouldn’t. It’s Second’s fault—Second hit Third when he said that, to paint a picture.

Third was fighting First’s fuckass brother before he knew First. And he had plenty of reason to take over the fight after them. Including the fact that all for one just killed his two best friends. He wouldn’t change a thing if he had to pick again. And he’s not sure about any afterlife—uh, for accuracy’s sake Izuku should admit that Bruce specifically said that Nine had this panic spiral when they met over the metaphysics of this all and if they’ve “locked themselves out of heaven” that he didn’t really get but Izuku was not panic spiraling it was a philosophical thought experiment—but he wouldn’t want any afterlife that didn’t include their dumb asses. Which is why he deserves invites to weddings. He cannot believe you two assholes subjected him to fucking middle school pining as if you hadn’t even held hands when you literally got married. He is bullying First so hard when he gets back inside this kid’s bones.

First asks Aizawa to leave. He’s not running. He just. He needs a second.

He’s alone in Izuku’s room for a lot longer than a second.

And Aizawa’s pretty sure he hears him crying in there.

Right. uh. First needs to tell Izuku just how sorry he is. This was his brother and his problem and he—he’s been trying to get Izuku’s body back for him. He swears he has. He’s sorry that First’s bullshit has done this to him. He never meant for this to happen.

Oh. It’s fine. Well like. The entire thing sort of sucks but it’s not like it’s First who needs to apologize for it. If anything, he’s the one who’s the biggest victim of this. Izuku gets to hang out in his own bones with the past users, who are pretty fucking sick and who are teaching Izuku knife tricks and how to steal cars via their own memories. Marketable life skills. And also Izuku can shoot guns now. So. Could be a lot worse as far as forcible possessions go. But First has to deal with his freak of a brother which. Honestly the short end of any stick.

He knows he doesn’t have to, right?

Okay like. Yes, All for One is making him do it right now because he’s the fucking worst, but like. First is dead. It’s Izuku’s turn to deal with this guy. All for One’s his responsibility

(Aizawa, in the background: “Midoriya I do not care what ghosts are haunting you fighting mass murderers is an adult responsibility—”)

He knows his first encounter with All for One didn’t exactly go great, and he’s sorry to First for that, because now he’s stuck doing this shit again. But the Past Users are preparing him for the next time. First can focus on getting back to the others. Izuku will handle his brother from there.

First ends it quickly after that.

He should, uh. He’s gonna take off. He uh. He’ll come back. He’s got that kid’s phone number… written on his stomach. And… the credit card of someone named Todoroki Enji? Is he. How did he get this. Is he supposed to have this. And he’s inexplicably wearing two hoodies he wasn’t wearing this morning so. Pretty set.

He’s not—he’ll do it, the plan with the Shinsou kid, he just. Historically reacts very poorly to mind control quirks and he’s sort of. Not in the best mindset to try it right now after. All the other stuff. Nine seemed to think it was going to be a more long term “invent a new way to use their quirk” thing and tonight’s just. It’d be setting them up for failure to try tonight. He’ll be back soon. Ish. He’ll call. But. leaving.

Yes. Leaving. That thing they promised Izuku they’d let him do. And he can do it. They just want him to know he does not have to. They have a room for him here that’s—honestly kind of trashed now, but there are spares. And other options. Safe houses. All Might’s house. Lots of options.

Awesome. Since he can do it, he’s. He’s gonna do it. Now.

That’s definitely a decision he can make. But he doesn’t have to. Like maybe it could be a test—

It could be. But it’s not. He’s. He’s gonna go.

Okay but would he just maybe consider not doing that

It’s not about his—everything. All of that highly distressing vigilantism he’s been up to. They’re shelving that issue

He’s been living on the streets. They don’t want him to be homeless. They can get him an apartment, a room, something. It doesn’t have to be with them.

And first is like. Oh. He’s pretty okay with it. Like. being homeless in the modern day is better than being homeless back at the dawn of quirks—

They don’t want Midoriya’s body being homeless.

Oh.

Yeah. He gets that. He just. He’s gonna.

He’ll freak out. Bad. Really, really fucking bad. If he feels trapped. And going to some room they prepared feels sort of like stepping on a mouse trap and just hoping it doesn’t snap so if he does he’ll. Freak out. And he’s really been trying not to do that in this kid’s body because he gets kind of. Reckless. You could say. It’s. It’s better this way. He’s not actually gonna use this guys credit card because you can track that so. Probably should take it back.

He eventually agrees to take a giant wad of unmarked bills from All Might. He’ll try to get a room or something. And he’ll be back.

He promises.

[awsugar]

feeling like sisyphus the way all i ever do is constantly re-engage with the same mcr content that has existed for 20 years, rewatch dan and phil videos ive seen 10 times each, rewatch supernatural for the millionth time...but not everything feels like something else....and nothing feels like those...

[pyjamatranslation]

*Season 5 bearded Carter appears*

Me: 😍🫠

My mum: I always thought he would be great as Jesus

Me: 🫨😵‍💫

[allblognamesaretakenso]

about to say something deeply controversial but the reason us luke stans will never be free of parasocial shipping nonsense and fans disguised as haters is because we’re way too kind to people who deserve zero grace and let them dominate spaces.

luke’s biggest fanbase arguably came from bridgerton/polin which means many luke fans are just shippers. not people who support him as an actor. not people who care about his work. just people obsessed with 'lukola', who want him to live out their fantasy.

go look at their accounts. it’s all about his personal life, shady posts about his gf/friends, and nothing about his actual career. no excitement for non-bridgerton projects. these are not luke fans. but they’re loud. and take up so much air in this fandom that they end up representing us by default.

meanwhile, an actual luke fan, someone who’s brought us content, organised a birthday fundraiser, promoted all his projects, gets chased off twitter just for saying antonia should post more luke content. like. she made a light comment about the fact that his girlfriend exists and they crucified her. that’s how twisted it’s gotten.

and then they turn around like “we only care about luke!! we don’t care about the adjacents!!” okay. then why do you spend 90% of your time harassing the people around him and spiraling over every move they make?

i have plenty of issues with jakolas and certain nicola solo stans (stans who shit on luke btw. you can definitely stan one and not the other). but they do one thing right, making new spaces where delusional shippers aren’t welcome. and honestly? we should take notes.

these people don’t see luke as a person. they see him as an object to control. the second he steps outside of that box, they lash out. and suddenly we’re in this upside-down reality where you can slutshame or misgender a woman and get 100 likes, but if you dare compliment her or even acknowledge her existence in a positive way, you get chased offline?

we shouldn't be letting these people police us, setting the rules of what’s acceptable in this fandom. we can say antonia’s pretty without creating deranged fan accounts for a real relationship. we can think they’re cute and just be glad luke's happy. we can exist here as actual luke fans without playing nice with people who only want to tear down everything that luke does. stop giving these people space. reclaim it.

[vaguely-concerned]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: The Veilguard (Video Game) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Lucanis Dellamorte/Rook Characters: Lucanis Dellamorte, Rook (Dragon Age), Spite (Dragon Age) Additional Tags: Character Study, (of both of them hopefully), Rook is Ellaryen 'Rye' Ingellvar, Mourn Watcher Rook (Dragon Age), Post-Canon, Rook finally gets to have a long-deferred breakdown, and Lucanis is there to help, The Grand Necropolis (Dragon Age), Varric Tethras casually haunting the narrative, that's fine he and the narrative go way back, reports say they were last seen making out with tongue, Grief/Mourning, from Spite's perspective this fic is 'had a pretty fun day at the beach eventually', And I Love That For Him Summary:

One moment Lucanis had been reaching out to touch Rook’s hand, resting next to his own on the Lighthouse dining hall table, and the next moment — he was here. And here was…

Spite was standing at his side, and all around them stretched the shaded, strange and silent halls of the Grand Necropolis.

It might be an indictment of some sort of Lucanis’ life that this didn’t even seem that weird to him anymore.

Set post-game. As Rook and Spite once went looking for Lucanis in his mind’s version of the Ossuary, Lucanis and Spite wander the Grand Necropolis in search of Rook, and find an ocean.

---

My Rookanis fic is officially finally done, folks, this is not a drill!