#any neurodivergence (including and ESPECIALLY cluster b disorders)

[definitelynotabanana]

i wish we could be normal about each other

[kamisamabest]

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

also known as "a collective name for 'abusive piece of shit asshole stupid toxic fuckers'"

smh

Common misconceptions about NPD :

"Narcissists don't have hearts! They only love themselves!"

Wrong. Shocking but pwNPD are still capable of having a heart and loving someone. I know countless pwNPD in healthy relationships with their partners. pwNPD might show love in other ways,as we are disordered people whose perception of multiple things are way different than an egotypical's.

"NPD isn't real! Narcissism is just excessive self love!"

Wrong. NPD is a very much real thing that comes from childhood abuse and neglect. It is a disorder for a reason,and we are traumatized. (of course it can be genetic but i won't be talking about that)

Narcissism isn't the "i love myself so much i always kiss myself on the mirror i have portraits of myself on the walls" thing. Narcissism NPD is basically someone masking as having a huge ego and thinking of themselves as superior to everything and anything because they have a low self-esteem that ruins their life. In fact,even the slightest mistake makes me and other narcissists crash out hard.

"All narcissists are evil! They don't care about anyone!"

Faulty. We are actually very capable of caring about people,we simply keep it for people we deem worthy of it. pwNPD can be very nice and kind, especially covert type narcissists. I myself have helped countless people.

As for the "People we deem worthy" part, pwNPD have"inner hierarchies". We may not care about a stranger on the street. But we care about people we deem equal/chosen/close to us. Some pwNPD including me think about their chosen/equal people as an extension of themselves and accept them as worthy as we are.

While pwNPD might be bad people,not every single one of them are. There are,like,thousands of people that have this disorder and not all of us are the same.

"Narcissistic abuse is real! Narcissists are evil and abusive!"

Oho ho,not only wrong but ableist! Narcissistic abuse isn't a real thing. If it is,then ptsd abuse/depression abuse/autistic abuse/neurotypical abuse and all other [disorder] abuse is also real, which they aren't because a disorder cannot abuse you and every single person with a disorder aren't the same.

People think that saying narcissistic abuse isn't real is invalidating their trauma but it isn't. If it invalidates someone's trauma, it's actually pwNPD's. If you go to any trustworthy site and look up types of abuse, narcissistic abuse won't be there,because it isn't real. Call it what it is: emotional abuse,or whatever abuse you went through,because narcissistic abuse isn't real.

In fact,people preaching about narcissistic abuse and selling stuff about how to cope with narcissists are the real people invalidating you and your struggles. They benefit off of your trauma and the stuff you went through by invalidating tons of other traumatized people with a disorder they cannot control and manipulate you into thinking it is real.

And here's the thing: a person cannot control their disorders. They cannot control which disorder they form and which they don't. And NPD forms from severe childhood trauma. The traumatized person you're shitting on did not choose to have that disorder,and they didn't sign up for your bullshit about them being evil because they formed a disorder out of their control.

If you are a neurodivergent person/person with a cluster b personality disorder/person with NPD and actively contribute to narcissistic abuse,you are also ableist. You having a disorder doesn't mean you can't be ableist to other disordered people,because you are: simply because they have a disorder. "I have NPD and I use it!" you are contributing to your own and your folk's oppression. This doesn't make you any better.

People with NPD are also traumatized,they do not control what disorder they form and what disorder they don't. Quit being an asshole to people just because they have a disorder and quit demonizing them.

[neopronouns]

I’m asking this as an autistic person but why are low empathy and low compassion considered fine? Empathy and compassion mean just.. caring about things. Why are we saying that not caring about anyone or anything is normal? I experience empathy/mild hyperempathy and don’t understand how someone wouldn’t feel that way. Someone who doesn’t have empathy or compassion sounds like an asshole. Like how is that a symptom of a mental disorder/disability? That’s just a basic emotion? I don’t mean to sound rude but I’m seeing a lot of people get absolutely dragged for saying things as basic as ‘having empathy is good’ and I don’t get it.

first off, empathy and compassion are not simply 'caring about things'. let's compare sympathy, empathy, and compassion, three terms that are often confused with one another:

sympathy: feelings of pity for another person's misfortune

empathy: the ability to understand and share another person's feelings

compassion: similar to sympathy, but additionally implies that one has a desire to help the person they feel pity for

these are often linked (especially compassion, as it often follows empathy or sympathy) but are distinct. notably, none of them are just 'caring about things' and none of them are just 'a basic emotion'; these are specific reactions one has to situations they encounter, which can vary drastically based on a number of factors.

i'm going to primarily address low empathy after this, since low empathy is a recognized symptom of a number of disorders and it genuinely should be destigmatized.

empathy is literally experiencing the emotions one recognizes in another person. it's an uncontrollable, subconscious reaction to emotions the person picks up on around them. empathetic reactions can occur whether or not you care about another person, whether or not you know them personally, etc. essentially, empathy is 'being in a person's shoes' in the moment.

low empathy is a common symptom of a number of mental conditions. this is because many disorders affect how one navigates social interaction and interprets others' emotions. a person with low or no empathy can't simply choose to care about a person's feelings and suddenly experience empathy; they genuinely do not have the ability to feel what another person is feeling for whatever reason.

here are some neurodivergencies that can cause low empathy and how:

autism: autism causes social deficits, notably including the ability to read another person's body language. if an autistic person can't read a person's body language, that makes it much harder to figure out what emotions they're feeling at a given time, which is necessary to experience empathy.

cluster b personality disorders (aspd, bpd, hpd, npd): cluster b disorders often cause dysfunctional patterns of social behavior. these pds often affect one's self-image or ego and cause emotional disturbances, which both make it much harder to understand what another person is feeling and, in turn, feel those feelings.

trauma: any trauma-related disorder can cause low empathy. ptsd/cptsd, personality disorders, dissociative disorders, and more can affect one's empathy. trauma can, for example, cause a person to become highly focused on their own wellbeing in order to survive, which may result in a lack of empathy in typical social interaction. trauma can also cause high empathy (it seems trauma generally affects empathy for a lot of people).

alexithymia: alexithymia is the term for struggling to recognize and express emotions. this includes both one's own emotions and the emotions of those around them. alexithymia is a very common symptom of various disorders, especially neurodevelopmental disorders. according to current research, over half of all autistic people experience alexithymia, which just adds to the number of low/no empathy autistics.

traumatic brain injury: injuries to the parts of the brain that handle empathy, emotion, and social interaction can cause low empathy

as you can see, low empathy is much more common that one might assume. this is why people are criticized for implying that having low empathy is bad; low empathy is uncontrollable and a symptom of many disorders, which makes these statements either inherently or overtly ableist.

having low empathy doesn't automatically make you an asshole. your actions matter more than your internal experience; a person with low empathy may not be able to take on another person's feelings, but they can still help them in some way. it's the same for people with high empathy — experiencing another person's emotions along with them doesn't necessarily mean that you will be kind to them or offer them assistance.

importantly, a person with low/no empathy can still care about others or take actions that indicate care. you can experience sympathy and compassion without experiencing empathy (though you don't have to experience those, either, to be a good person). you don't have to be able to experience or understand another person's emotions to recognize that they're struggling.

this is a long post, sorry, but it's an important issue. being ableist is never okay, no matter how unpalatable you find the symptom.

[starfilled-galaxy]

Hi! Welcome to our blog :3 [Accessible version of this post: linked]

We are plural! This links to a post with sys info and alter intros! [outdated] | Doubles and sourcemates can interact! Plush (QP partner) sys!!: @npd-akechi <33 Do not call us parts or use parts language for us!!!!!

Rw Hero's (🌹) bug blog: @heros-bug-collection Hs Kel's (🧡) agere blog: @kels-pillow-fort

Our carrd: [WIP] Our prns.pg: [WIP] Our discord: .starfilled_galaxy. Our SP: starfilled-galaxy (^ will not accept dms or frqs from people we don't recognize)

Collective disabilities & NDs Prof dx: ADHD, autistic, social anxiety, fibromyalgia Heavily suspected: OCD, mild depression Suspected/traits of: NPD, HPD, ASPD

We have a filter tag! Please read if we are mutuals!! Info: Here

BYI:

Due to low energy, we don't normally keep this blog very accessible, meaning we won't be adding plain text or image ids for a large majority of our posts. We also usually don't (trigger) tag capslock, reclaimed slurs (t, d, and f slurs), repetition, big/colored text, etc. If thats something that causes you issues please block us for your comfort!

We do try to tag eyestrain, flashing lights, and reblog bait though!

DNI:

Basic dni criteria (racist, queerphobic, right wing, and similar)

Transid, radqueer, pro-noncon/consang/abuse, and supporters

Proship/darkship/comship

Demonize ANY disorders (especially cluster B PDs, psychotics, etc)

Anti good faith identities, anti alterhuman (including anti factkin), anti endos, anti willos

Any kind of "stan" (includes kpop stans)

If you think Kel from OMORI isn't traumatized, you think of him as a joke, or you think he's stupid/a moron

Demonize, hate, or sexualize ANY of the OMORI cast, including sexualizing the adults

[SFW banner by @plural-sunny]

More about us under cut!

Please note that we are bodily a minor, we try to stay out of discourse/discussions we feel we do not have the maturity or experience to properly form an opinion on

Chronic procrastinator</3 I'm sorry if I told you I'd do something and then took a very long time to do it...

Spinterests -

Topics: Neurodivergencies Plural experiences (especially unconventional ones)

Media: OMORI (very active) OneShot (mostly inactive) Mystreet/MCD (mostly inactive)

Userboxes!

[userboxes made by @genicpunk, @sweetpeauserboxes, us, @cringegenic, @forget-meabh-not, and @lillieof-thevalley]

[mutt-the-punk]

HAI

My nAme is River, I'm a scemo (Scene & emo)person who luvs new friends (Including you!! <33)

I use tUmblr as a kewl (cool) & fUn way 2 find new friendz and to find peOple whom have the same interEsts as mE (Interests later listed)

Oh no.. your computer has a virus! I'll help you out but you gotta listen first.

Dni: Homophobic, Transphobic, Racist, Ablelist, pro overturning of Roe V Wade, -12,+21, Andrew Tate watchers, Msi supporters, falling in reverse supporters (basic Dni), Cringe culture, mean, rude, anti tone tagsif you are &/or support any of the following:

* racist, anti-black, against blm, support alm/blue lives matter, against police abolition & acab. xenophobic, antisemitic, islamophobic, nazi, zionist, assadist. don't support land back. alt-right.

* pro-life, anti-abortion. map, nomap. use/say slurs you can't reclaim. aren't critical of interests.

* romanticize or glorify abuse, and/or mental illness. trauma invalidation. think [emotional] neglect isn't a form of abuse.

if you are &/or support any of the following queerphobic beliefs:

* radfem, terf, swerf. transmed, truscum. against neopronouns, against xenogenders. against lesbians who use pronouns outside of she/her, and gays who use pronouns outside of he/him.

* fetishize mlm, fetishize wlw. think mlm are inherently 'less oppressed' by society, oppression olympics in general.

* believe aroace people aren't inherently lgbtq. mistreat transhets due to them being het. think polyamory is inherently sexual, think you can't cheat on your partners in polyam relationships.

* think bisexuality is the 'default' to being mspec, think pansexuality is biphobic, think trans people aren't included in bisexuality. treat pan/omni/ply/etc. as micro-labels under bisexuality.

if you are &/or support any of the following radinclus beliefs:

* pro-ship, anti-anti, pro-fic. think fiction has no effect on reality. pro-para (pedophilia, zoophilia, necrophilia, etc.).*

* mspec 'lesbians', mspec 'gays', and mspec 'straights'. lesboys, turigirls, 'male lesbians', 'gay women'.

* transabled*; endogenic, xeno-origin, any non-traumagenic 'systems' are included. 'systems' caused by disorders outside of DID or OSDD-1, like 'bpd systems', you get the gist; think you can have any trauma disorder without the trauma.

* this doesn't mean the support for the people with disorders that cause these thoughts and feelings. this means the anti-recovery sentiment of identifying as 'pro-paraphilia' & transabled- whether or not you have said disorders- and the worsening of symptoms.

if you are &/or support any of the following ableist beliefs:

*accuse people of faking their disability, also known as fakeclaiming. exclude the experiences of physically disabled people when talking about ableism. dismiss the experiences of chronically ill people due to the fluctuation of severity in symptoms.

* think allistics can say the r slur, think the infinity symbol is for all neurodivergent people rather than just autistics. against informed self diagnosis.

* think people with cluster b personality disorders are inherently abusive, or that people with DID, schizophrenia, psychosis, ASPD, etc. are dangerous or violent. 'narcissistic abuse' truther.

* misuse mental health terms, like naricissistic, psycho[path], psychotic, delusional, schizo, etc., especially in a derogatory fashion.

If you are any of those, I can't help you! Srry, not srry..

There we are, I just changed your computers oil out!....

Your computer doesn't take oil? Oopsies..

Wellll while you're contacting tech support, let's talk about a few of the things I like!

Interests: Monster high (Mh), My little pony (mlp), Invader zim (Iv), Ruby gloom (Rb), Waffles (no really, I love them), Tone tags, Swag new friends, Slushies (SO YUMMY!!)

My favorite characters: Derpy (mlp), Gir (Iv), Discord (mlp) Draculara (Mh), Ruby Gloom (Rb), Skelita (Mh), Sarah Scare (Mh), Clawdeen (Mh), Lagoona (Mh), Bender (Futurama), Ghoulia (Mh), and a few OthErz

Other: My dms are open but I don't respond often, my notifications are off.

I luv 2015

I REALLLY like neon (Mainly Green & Pink)

I watch REPOSTED Shane Dawson vidz, Markiplier, and Brandon Ferris!!!

LVL 14

You managed to get on the tech support line but you're on hold? Hm.... let's play my favorite song!!

You finally got ahold of them? SWAG! Well I've gotta go, byeeee

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Just a reminder that this blog is friendly toward:

Trans people, especially trans people whose body dysphoria plays into their ED. This includes enbies too.

POC with EDs

Fat people with ANY ED. Fat people who restrict, fat people who binge, and everything in between.

People with physical disabilities and chronic health conditions, especially people whose health condition contributes to their ED

Neurodivergent people, especially ND people whose neurodivergent condition contributes to their ED

People with highly stigmatized mental illnesses, including Cluster B personality disorders. As long as you are not directly causing harm to others, you should have access to a space of healing.

People with any and all EDs. This is including anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder, orthorexia, ARFID, EDNOS, etc.

People with more than one ED

People whose EDs are considered "mild"

People whose EDs are considered "extreme"

People who haven't had their ED for very long

People who've been struggling with their ED for years

People who do not have an ED, but want to know how to help their loved ones who struggle

Pro-ED blogs. (Yes, those too.) As long as you don't add pro comments to my posts or add pro interaction to followers who are trying to heal, I welcome you here. I was once like you and hope perusing this blog can be your first step toward healing.

I try to maintain a space where everyone on this list can coexist and heal, which can be complicated because so many different EDs can mean there are conflicting access needs. If you are directly putting negativity or anti-healing commentary toward any of the above communities, I will need to block you. I've only had to block a couple of people so far, but my following seems to be growing and I suspect there will be more. Please let me know if you need me to tag anything for your blacklist, but I will not tolerate outright negativity towards people who have come here to heal.

[fanby-fckry]

1.) Thank you :3

2.) If I can find it, lol.

I was writing it up at the same time I posted the dogwhistle post, and the notes on that one were stressing me out so much that I delayed the Stella post for the sake of my sanity.

Then it got lost, because I have over a thousand drafts at any given point in time.

3.) Yup! I’ll have to find the stream and timestamp eventually, so that I can site it.

Granted, I can’t say for certain whether Viv was talking about NPD or the more classical and/or armchair sense of the word narcissist, as she only said “narcissist,” not NPD. The context, iirc, was about Alastor’s inflated sense of self, but she didn’t use those exact words, so it’s not like she was quoting the DSM or anything.

That being said, whether or not it was intentional, he does still present with some symptoms of NPD in canon.

Many of us pilot and pre-pilot era fans have been extrapolating on that one comment, including myself and the author of AOTM if I had to guess). It’s a huge part of my “cluster b soup” headcanon, and informs every Alastor I write.

I was incredibly happy to see it backed up in onscreen canon, especially with a few examples that are more neutral. A lot of people have noticed his mini narc crash with Carmilla, but I have yet to see anyone say anything super saneist about it. I think it’s a great example of how to work some more benign references to stigmatized disorders.

4.) Yes! I love seeing Vox fans with NPD! The sense of community forged around him is something I’ve never seen before for NPD. Like you, I’ve seen it with a few other neurodivergencies and associated coded characters, but not often and not NPD specifically.

Although, I’ve heard there’s something similar going on with Bojack Horseman. I might have to watch that show and take a looksee at the fandom to find out if the whispers are true.

5.) Yup! The lateral aggression from other neurodivergent people makes me want to scream. It’s all, “Fandom is neurodivergent!” until has a personality disorder or psychosis or even just a more stigmatized symptom of a less stigmatized neurotype and then it’s “No, not like that!”

6.) I actually love that you came right out and said, “if you need a selfish reason to do the right thing,” because I’ve been dancing around that phrase for the past few years out of fear I’ll have it taken out of context and weaponized against me.

Call me calloused or manipulative or whatever, but I believe in giving “selfish reasons” because there are people who aren’t going to care if it’s not about them.

Which is kinda hilarious in this case. “Narcissists are bad because they don’t care about anyone but themselves! They have no empathy! They don’t view their partners/family as real people!” in the same breath as, “Why should I care about the demonization of a mental illness I don’t have? I don’t care if people that I don’t personally know or relate to get hurt. They lack qualities that (I’ve arbitrarily decided) make us human, which means I don’t have to treat them like people.”

My personal go to for “selfish reasons,” especially when it comes to lateral aggression, is the overlap between NPD and other neurodivergencies.

That post about the three mental illnesses post, and how any mental illness can be put into any category based on how someone wants to dehumanize someone with that mental illness.

I have witnessed people flip like a switch from thinking my symptoms were #relatable and uwu poor baby trauma response to crazy manipulative bitch.

The same thing happened to an audhd, persotypical friend of mine, who was excised from their friend group and labeled Narc Lite for *checks notes* not being able to read social cues over text and misreading situations because of it (“pushing boundaries”) and discussing feeling upset after repeatedly canceled plans because it changed their routine and gave them RSD (“guilt tripping”).

If you make a box for “neurodivergent person it’s ok to dehumanize,” then every neurodivergent person is one wrong move from getting put in the box. You are not immune to the box.

Also, you’re not derailing at all, dw about it! I really enjoy your additions to my posts, and any time I don’t respond, I probably either didn’t get the notif or it’s sitting in my drafts. Which uh… as mentioned earlier. Are a mess.

Ok, I had a whole post about why it’s fucked up to start calling Stella a narcissist as soon as we had solid proof she’s abusing Octavia, but it’s lost in my drafts and I just saw someone call Cash a narcissist so…

Narcissist is not a synonym for abuser and narcissistic abuse is not real!

I say this as someone abused by someone with NPD. Because guess what? I was also abused by multiple other neurodivergent people without NPD, but if I called that “autistic abuse” or “obsessive compulsive abuse” you’d rightfully be down my throat about being ableist.

Please point to me where Stella and Cash show symptoms of NPD. I’ll wait.

And no, Cash’s scapegoat/golden/forgotten child family structure does not count. That’s just regular ol’ child abuse stuff. I was the scapegoat for my non-NPD grandmother, I would know.

[h3r3-4nd-qu33r]

About Us!

We’re a traumagenic, polyfragmented DID system

We have over 1,000 alters in our

We’re autistic, psychotic and possibly schizophrenic

We love video games, especially Terraria, Stardew Valley, Skyrim, Minecraft and ACNH

Our Names

Nikolai

Niko

Muzzle

Fynn

Fyntan

Our Pronouns

He/him/his/himself

They/them/theirs/themself

It/it/its/itself

xe/xem/xeirs/xemself

Vi/vem/veirs/vemself

Yawn/yawn/yawns/yawnself

Paw/paw/paws/pawself

Do not Interact

Basic criteria (racist, islamphobes, antisemites, ableists, MAPs/NOMAPs/ACNOMAPs/PEARs/Zoos/Necrophiles & supporters, Sanists, Queerphobes/homophobes/transphobes/TERFs, SWERFs, fat-phobes/fat shamers, etc.)

Proship/Anti-anti

MOGAI exclus

Aspec exclus

If you think the split attraction model is only for aspec ppl

Non-binary skeptics

Anti-neopronouns

Anti-xenopronouns

Anti-emojiself pronouns

Anti-nounself pronouns

Non-traumagenic “systems” or supporters (questioning traumagenic systems and traumagenic systems that don’t remember their trauma are welcome to stay tho!)

g*re blogs

if you s*xualize age regression

If you believe that NPD abuse, BPD abuse, ASPD abuse, cluster B abuse and PD abuse are real

Please Interact

Queer people

Questioning people

DID and OSDD systems who have queer headmates

queer supporters

those who aren’t accepted by their friends or family (if this is you, we’re your family now /pos)

Allocishets who are here to learn and educate themselves on queer matters

Cosplayers and fursuiters (ilysm /p /pos)

Neurodivergent people who identify as queer in any way

Before you Follow

This page is not for discourse or syscourse. We’ll be making a page for those pretty soon tho as long as we’re mentally up for it. So basically, keep the discourse away from here

The tags we use for TWs are #tw #tw eyes #tw gore #tw blood #tw candy gore #mild tw #medium tw #heavy tw #tw medical stuff #tw vent #vent #tw traumacore #tw sexual #tw sexual mentions #tw gore mentions #tw blood mentions #tw medical mentions #tw religion #tw queerphobia #tw ableism #tw racism #tw antisemitism #tw islamphobia #tw colorism #tw sanism

We try to not mention triggering stuff too often but just incase, if you can’t see that stuff without it triggering you we recommend you block those tags

This is a sage space for every type of queer person except for exclusionists. Queer people that are welcome here includes those with “scary” disorders/mental illnesses and also are queer, those who use neopronouns or xenopronouns, those who use xenogenders, microlabel users, ND queers, baby queers, experienced queers, etc. And if you say anything hateful to any of those groups of people you are immediately getting blocked.

[smartbutuncertified]

We need to talk about the ableism in tumblr’s activist community.

In any activist blog I follow not run by a disabled person, these things tend to crop up.

-mocking politicians by calling them senile, crazy, narcissistic, etc. Especially old ones. This teams up with tumblr’s attitude of suspicion towards anyone older than their mid-twenties to create some ugly ableist statements. Call an asshole an asshole, call incompetence incompetence, call willful ignorance willful ignorance. Stop using disability as shorthand for “bad”.

-putting empathy. on a pedestal. Empathy is just the ability to feel what another person feels. It is a morally neutral quality. But people will talk about someone who did something horrific, such as not wearing a mask in public, and say that they have no empathy. You have no idea if they have empathy. What they clearly don’t have is concern for other human beings, which is a very different thing.

-derailing conversations about our tragedies. This mainly happens around sterilization with the intention of eugenics. Yes, these programs have always had a racist base, but they have also always had overtly ableist justifications. They are aimed at both POC and disabled people, especially disabled POC. These tragedies belong to both of us.

-treating outrage/real world action/donations as the only valid methods of activism.These are both incredibly draining, and often the second one is barred to us through inaccessible locations/lack of accessibility options, and the third by the fact that medical treatment, if we can get it, is expensive. Educating when we can, sticking up for our rights, just staying alive in a world that sees us as burdens- these are all valid methods of activism, and you’re not a bad person for only being able to do even those some of the time.

-not treating disability as an intersectional issue. Disability is treated like a design feature, like blond hair or long nails, not like a part of our identity. I specifically see this a lot with discussions of disabilities relating to the reproductive system. They are lumped under reproductive issues, which are further lumped under women’s issues, when the goal of many disabled people whose disability affects their reproductive system is just to be taken seriously and to stop hurting. Yes, women with these issues are ignored a lot, but not all of these people are women, and the goal is more aligned with the general goals of disability rights than those of women’s rights.

-speaking of which, many abled activists boost disability positivity, but not disability rights. I can count on one hand the posts about disability rights I’ve seen from abled people. And even the disability positivity is limited. Most of it centers around less stigmatized (on Tumblr) mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety, and neurodivergencies such as autism and ADHD. I am not saying to stop that, I am saying that A) think about why those posts don’t include mental illnesses like schizophrenia and the cluster b personality disorders, B) think about why they don’t include physical disabilities, and C) consider boosting our voices, history, and struggles as well as “ADHD WLW should all have a great day!” Because really, they deserve to.

Other disabled people are welcome to chip in and add their experiences and insight.

Ableds are free to reblog this, but this is a post about disabled struggles and frustrations. This is a post about feeling ignored, invisible, and talked over. Consider this post before you add to it.

[wolf-skins]

Hey, I was wondering if you could tell me what bpd is exactly... I saw you posted about it once and I... idk I kinda related but I don't wanna just grab something offline and slap the label onto me when I don't know what it is and I was hoping if you could explain it? If not that's totally okay cause I wouldn't wanna impose or anything

Hey! It’s no problem.

A lot of people find various symptoms or experiences with BPD relatable. This is because a lot of experiences people who have BPD go through comes from trauma, plus BPD has a lot of fluctuating mood things which can be easily relatable to anyone who has a mood disorder. It’s actually something a lot of people in the BPD community get upset about, when their BPD posts are high-jacked by neurotypicals who go: “I don’t have BPD, but…” A lot of neurodivergent people could relate on some level too.

Keep in mind, too, that BPD is a personality disorder (PD). People with PDs tend to have similarities to them, especially if they share a “cluster”. (PDs are categorized in cluster A, cluster B, and cluster C, each cluster containing PDs with similarities). I just want to clear that up first, because exploring mental illness is always going to be complicated as heck! There are so many overlapping things, and everyone responds to different things in their life or traumas in different ways, so that could also have an affect. I cannot stress enough on doing excessive research.

BPD stands for borderline personality disorder. It’s also sometimes called “emotionally unstable personality disorder”. The biggest, common symptoms of BPD are: extreme emotional imbalance (to quote someone with it, it’s like all of our nerves are exposed, and every little touch causes an extreme reaction - this meaning that the very tiniest thing can set our extreme emotions off, and our emotions completely overwhelm us until we can’t focus on anything else), extreme abandonment issues (real or imagined), splitting (black and white thinking; something is all good or all bad, no in-betweens), identity disturbance, and impulsiveness. You can read the basics about it here. 

BPD consists of a number of symptoms including chronic feelings of emptiness, dissociative symptoms, impulsivity, rapid mood swings, low self-esteem, instability in goals and self-identity, instability in relationships, anxiety, anger, fear of abandonment, and suicide attempts and self-harm. -shitborderlinesdo

Personality disorders are severe mental illnesses for which there is no cure - not even with medication. Meds can help, of course, and I personally wouldn’t be alive without them, but our biggest help comes from therapies, most prominently DBT (built for borderlines by a borderline, but it helps with anyone facing extreme emotions) and CBT. But looking into any therapy helps a lot.

A common, extremely common, theme around borderlines (but there are exceptions, as with anything) is extreme abuse in adolescence or adulthood. S*xual abuse is common and not unheard of. Another theory about why borderlines become who we are is that we may have been overly sensitive children, who ended up deprived of the attention/love/support we needed (through in some abuse, and, well). There are other factors, but that’s considered one of them.

BPD is one of the most life-threatening mental illnesses, following only after eating disorders. 

There are a lot of disorders that have similarities to BPD, bipolar disorder being a common one. Most of us end up misdiagnosed with BD because borderlines can have both manic and depressive symptoms. They manifest in slightly different ways, and people with bipolar disorder tend to have longer fluctuations between mania/mixed/depression. Their moods are more likely to last weeks or months, while ours can change within minutes or hours. 

If you feel like you relate to some of the symptoms, but not all, there are a list of mental illnesses/disorders which may be similar here. We also have common traits that are usually associated with other neurodivergencies, like child regression or stimming. 

I cannot sum up a whole disorder in one post, however. Like any mental illness, it’s very complex and the experiences will range from person to person. The best, concise (and not biased) resources I can give you are shitborderlinesdo FAQs here on tumblr: 1, 2. The tumblr is run by borderlines for borderlines, and many of the mods that built the FAQ have or are going through different psychology majors and the like.Keep in mind to avoid Google when looking into this as best you can. BPD has been mislabeled for years as The Inherently Abusive Disorder™, and there entire sites and books set up building around this idea. The most popular one lists that all symptoms of emotional abuse means that, of course, your abuser must be borderline! Because yeah, that makes sense. (Try imagining the affect of telling people that their mental illness makes them abusive by default…. well, you can see the results because 98% of us believe we’re awful, manipulative assholes lmao.)

The FAQ has a ton of information ready at hand, but I can also recommend Girl, Interrupted (the book, not the movie - though the movie is good it’s way off the mark and doesn’t represent any mental illness properly) by Susana Kaysen for an inside look into BPD. I also really like The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook, which is an easy to follow workbook for DBT skills. If you feel you can relate even on some level to BPD, learning some DBT skills will help, regardless if you are borderline or not! <3

If you have any more specific questions (like perhaps what posts you related to, because maybe I can also help point you to reasons why you related to those) or anything, let me know.

I’m publishing this because it’s a common question, and many people think BPD is relatable without realizing that our symptoms are so much more intense than they can imagine. That’s not saying that relating to a post or symptom is bad at all, and could most definitely point to something deeper going on within you/whomever, but BPD is also much more complex than a lot of people imagine.

I’m going to keep trying to post more info about it as I go along, bc I’ve always been obsessive about research into mental illnesses, and because it’s nice to be able to share things that can help both myself and others understand what I’m going through. If you don’t want to go through the frickton of resources in the FAQs, keep a look out for my ‘bpd info’ tag. I hope some of this helps, and if you want me to remove this from being public just let me know, and I can instead send this whole thing to you privately.

[starfilled-galaxy]

Hi! Welcome to our blog :3 [All image ids in this post are in alt text]

We are plural! This links to a post with sys info and alter intros! [outdated] | Doubles and sourcemates can interact! Plush (QP partner) sys!!: @npd-akechi <33 Do not call us parts or use parts language for us!!!!!

Rw Hero's (🌹) bug blog: @heros-bug-collection Hs Kel's (🧡) agere blog: @kels-pillow-fort

Our carrd: [WIP] Our prns.pg: [WIP] Our discord: .starfilled_galaxy. Our SP: starfilled-galaxy (^ will not accept dms or frqs from people we don't recognize)

Collective disabilities & NDs Prof dx: ADHD, autistic, social anxiety, fibromyalgia Heavily suspected: OCD, mild depression Suspected/traits of: NPD, HPD, ASPD

We have a filter tag! Please read if we are mutuals!! Info: Here [linked]

BYI:

[pt: BYI:]

Due to low energy, we don't normally keep this blog very accessible, meaning we won't be adding plain text or image ids for a large majority of our posts. We also usually don't (trigger) tag capslock, reclaimed slurs (t, d, and f slurs), repetition, big/colored text, etc. If thats something that causes you issues please block us for your comfort!

We do try to tag eyestrain, flashing lights, and reblog bait though!

DNI:

[pt: DNI:]

Basic dni criteria (racist, queerphobic, right wing, and similar)

Transid, radqueer, pro-noncon/consang/abuse, and supporters

Proship/darkship/comship

Demonize ANY disorders (especially cluster B PDs, psychotics, etc)

Anti good faith identities, anti alterhuman (including anti factkin), anti endos, anti willos

Any kind of "stan" (includes kpop stans)

If you think Kel from OMORI isn't traumatized, you think of him as a joke, or you think he's stupid/a moron

Demonize, hate, or sexualize ANY of the OMORI cast, including sexualizing the adults

[SFW banner by @plural-sunny]

More about us under cut!

Please note that we are bodily a minor, we try to stay out of discourse/discussions we feel we do not have the maturity or experience to properly form an opinion on

Chronic procrastinator</3 I'm sorry if I told you I'd do something and then took a very long time to do it...

Spinterests - [pt: Spinterests -] Topics: Neurodivergencies Plural experiences (especially unconventional ones) Media: OMORI (very active) OneShot (mostly inactive) Mystreet/MCD (mostly inactive)

Userboxes!

[pt: Userboxes!]

[userboxes made by @genicpunk, @sweetpeauserboxes, us, @cringegenic, @forget-meabh-not, and @lillieof-thevalley]