#anyway. just something i've been pondering

[jelly-opal]

OKAY that Star Wars Explained Sanctuary spoiler interview with Lamar Giles came out a couple days ago. You can watch here if you want. Speaking of - I haven't seen a lot of interviews posted and I've been trying to keep a close eye on it. If you have any others you know of lmk.

Highlights and thoughts below (particularly about a Tech and Phee thing) and also a thing about the "why was x included but x wasn't?" question I've seen floating around:

The "can clones have children?" question was pitched by Lamar and he thought SW wouldn't be down. But apparently they were cool with it.

This question has been addressed in Legends, but the way it went down in the EU was, in my opinion, weird. I think the Sanctuary approach is much less weird, which is good. I also think that of the newish lore decisions, this seems like a pretty easy one to approve. It's very open-ended, it doesn't create gaping holes in the lore, and also doesn't close any doors, thus not backing LF/SW into any weird corners. I also feel like the majority of the fandom was already in the "yeah they can probably have kids" boat (I certainly was), so really, it's kind of an easy trigger to pull. What would make it difficult -- because SW really does keep making things quite difficult for themselves -- is that they have to know people are gonna go CRAZY that it's confirmed. And, even MORE difficult, is the following:

Sohi and Ponder are meant to be a "really great potential version" of Tech and Phee ("what could have been and what could be, like a multiverse version," Lamar said). Which is.....bold. And very on the nose and very not subtle. And especially bold and very cool that the connection is largely made by Tech.

But it also brings up the question: Really, is SW gonna do anything else with it? Sohi and Ponder are cool characters, it was a fun story to read, but like, SW has the opportunity for an absolute LAYUP by showing us the version of TechPhee where they actually get that life. It is the absolute easiest dunk in the world for SW and they are currently just holding it in their hands and...waiting?

At this point, this all feels very Chekhov's gun-y to me. Like oh, okay, we're picking up this bit of lore, we're throwing it around, we're looking at it, is anyone gonna use it? Not only that, but good grief, the pre-relationship dance between Tech and Phee is as direct (in this book at least, less so in the show) as a few other SW romances I can think of, and all of those do end in some sort of very concrete action/declaration. And SW had to approve that! They read those words on a page and said, "yeah that's fine."

I do not and will not buy that Tech is just like "ope! what a fun life i could have lived. bye!" and then Plan 99'd. Yes, I hear the people yelling that he knew what his sacrifice meant, that that's why it's important. To that I say: No. Hard disagree. Everything about Tech is a subversion of expectations, and I truly believe that yeah, he thought he was gonna die, but he came to on that mountain or whatever and was like, "Well as I said: we never were any good at following orders." And that subversion of expectations needs to continue into him being able to have a very happy life and be something he wants to be (and according to this book, dude wants to be Phee's Husband and Father of Her Children).

So anyway, I think it's bold. I like that it was included. I'm very happy about it and I'm glad they let Lamar do it. But I am begging SW to please do something else with it.

Now, here's where I'm at with it. When bringing these books together, I believe SW's biggest priority is going to be: 1.) Not contradicting themselves; 2.) Not shutting the door on any future stories. Retconning and backtracking are very messy, and while I don't have concrete evidence of this -- not that SW would come right out and say it -- I do think the team is treading a bit lightly, especially compared to the way books were written in the old EU. I think it introduced so much so quickly, and all of those different webs got very twisted. There have already been some mishaps/corrections/redirections in the new canon but as far as ground-breaking lore is concerned, that seems to be a bit more concentrated and focused.

Regarding the question of where Phee's backstory is: I think it's somewhere. Genuinely. We know that the devs do have a sort of "skeleton" outline of Phee's character. By that I mean we have the acknowledgement that she is a combo of several people (Han Solo, Anne Bonny, Jack Sparrow) that she has the standing to give Cid a hard time, etc. I wouldn't doubt that they threw around some other ideas to give themselves some clarity and direction but it never made it to the screen/page. Although Filoni didn't work on TBB as much, he is known for having massive backstories he shares with the actors (Rebels, most notably) but which are not publicly available, so I wouldn't doubt that it kind of became a thing that others did as well, and I dunno, maybe they gave a little readout to Wanda or to the animators, etc. I also think that, should Phee come back in later media, SW is going to want to be very focused about how her character is developed out to ensure that they are connecting everything.

I had originally wondered if Sanctuary was a "lost script" kind of thing, Dark Disciple-style. We now know it is not. It's totally new. But looking at something like Dark Disciple, in which one of TCW's primary antagonists dies and a fan-favorite side character literally turns to the Dark Side but comes back -- that's a lot to have in a book. But it was forced into book form. Dark Disciple was not supposed to be like that. Getting it printed was a last ditch effort to get it out there somehow, because otherwise it just wouldn't really get to exist. While TBB as a show is done, I don't think TBB's characters and themes are done, so I don't think they've reached a point where major story beats must be carried out in a book yet. I think much more time will have to pass before we reach that point. (Padme trilogy is an example that comes to mind. We had to wait a long time for those books.)

TBB is a very, very new addition to SW. It could take a while before the full depth of whatever the devs want to do with it is realized. I mean, we are still getting additions to the literal OT-era, and still getting additions to an already very packed TCW-era. SW plays a very long game. And making big lore decisions is very much like salting your food: it's always easier to add than it is to take away.

Big picture, I think, is this: I believe Sanctuary is very consistent with a first title under a show's umbrella. I think it is paving the way for other stuff. I also think SW is still putting out a lot of feelers and Sanctuary is a very comfortable addition to that, because it's a fun adventure story that answers a few questions and gives us more about Tech. What they were very likely NOT going to do is whack us upside the head with a ton of stuff in the very first book. And also, they have not expanded at ALL on the post-Tech life of the Batch (S3 doesn't count, imo because it just like, isn't addressed). And I really do think that that is intentional. But also, I think on-screen is always going to be prioritized over books. They reach more people and they are seen as more concrete additions to the canon by many, including the show runners (even if everything is technically canon).

So....we're getting there. I really do think we're getting there. I'm just not giving up on the idea of Phee getting more development and the idea of Tech coming back. It's way too early.

[belle--ofthebrawl]

the cerberus mode trio has already existed when aether was still in the band so I don't think all of them are characterized as chronically sweet submissive bottoms. which would bring me to the big guys are always dominant tops stereotype too but I digress. and show acting =/= how they act or their role in the bedroom. they could be dominant sluts on stage and be asexual andor sex repulsed off it or the other way around just to add to the brain gear turning

The current Cerberus Mode trio, then. Rain and Dew and Phantom/Aeon. Thank you for keeping me on my toes about what exactly I am referring to.

Cerberus Mode has existed since at LEAST Ifrit I want to say, but we're not here to nitpick proper terminology and timelines are we? We're here to discuss my desire to see skinny mean trans twinks be sadists. Preferably to big trans men eager to put down their tough guy persona for a bit to be a chew toy to a very pretty someone with very sharp teeth.

I like the idea of asexual and sex-repulsion to add another layer to it. This is an erotic writing blog at the end of the day, and there are so many ways one could engage in sex and still hold their own personal boundaries. I think the closest I've ever come to writing that would be Aeolian Music, where Cirrus suffered from vaginismus and anorgasmia because I didn't want a dominant woman to be always put into a "mommy" role. Or for someone with a vagina to be able to cum without a struggle. And I had people reach out to be to thank me for writing that, to put a name to a condition they themselves had without even realizing it was a problem they could name and therefore fix. Anorgasmia is something I myself have struggled with in the past and it's definitely colored how I interact with people sexually interested in me.

Oh, "something for your heart-shaped locket" too, where Cirrus had to immediately clean up after phone sex because she hates the mess her own body generates...Why is it always Cirrus with me...

No one accuse me of telling people to get their Sex Ed from fanfic, alright?

I'm just tired of going into a fandom and seeing the usual silhouettes put into the usual positions/roles. I'm tired of how it has come very clearly across in my own writing as well, although not egregiously so considering I haven't had a call-out post written about me yet...Not a dig at anyone, just a jab at the endless watch-and-correct culture of Tumblr. But people and bodies are different and when we dig into the characters, give the story meat beyond just a porn fic, it's extremely rewarding and helps you grow as a writer. This is a hobby I can do for free and get immediate feedback and fulfillment on. Why wouldn't I want to do my very best? Do something in my own unique way? The validation I've gotten from my friends means so much to me. It makes me think I could make it as a published author, even if it's just the self-done route.

Anyway, going back to sex repulsed. The last two times I saw Ghost live, Rain always gave off the impression he was vaguely disgusted with the writhing crowd of human bodies. To me. Especially these last few shows I've been to, where he's held the veil over his nose? Reminds me of what I do when I smell something bad and I'm conveniently wearing a shawl or a scarf. (And the whiffs i caught of the crowd...people, please. A shower and some actual deodorant won't kill you.) And the casual way he jerks his guitar off, no desperation just slow and methodical makes me think of a fic where he's angry at his body's arousal response because he doesn't have time to deal with the struggle of cumming and cleaning up.

I'm going to write these things, but I can't deny the sneaking suspicion I know exactly how they'll be received since they aren't the norm. Oh well. Who gives a fuck. I do this for love of the game and I won't stop just because I never made it big.

The gears are certainly turning. Thank you for this. It's fueled my midnight pondering session with many thoughts, many thoughts indeed.

[sun-marie]

i don't recall if DAI ever did anything with this, but i'm really interested in the potential dynamic Leliana and Cullen have if Leliana was there with the Hero of Ferelden when he was being tortured at Kinloch Hold

[nikolas-ghostbusters-fixation]

Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.

I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.

I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??

Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.

[purplecelestial-buddy]

"Why are you glaring at him?" "He was glaring at me first." "But you're the upperclassman, so act like it!"

"You don't think Kagiura can handle his own fights?"

HAHAHAHAHHA

[walker-lister]

I just have to remind myself sometimes that no matter what anyone else says, the way a piece of media makes me feel and the positive impact it has had on my queer identity is valid, and that tearing myself apart thinking I have to defend it or questioning my own place within queer communities is not at all important when compared to the almost tangible sense of 'rightness' that piece of media helped me to feel about myself.

[autistic-shaiapouf]

Beginning to really wonder how much of my financial concern is manufactured and handed to me as opposed to something I'm genuinely concerned by

[seaofreverie]

Big day for me because I 1) got up at a normal hour 2) you won't believe this, but maybe the show writeups are finally starting to happen

[d0litte]

SWEET PRISONER. dark!Caitlyn kiramman x f!reader

tw ; G!PCaitlyn cause girls can have dicks to force deep down your throat. Rape/noncon, you make it clear that you don't want to but she fucks you anyways, reader trapped, kidnapping, manipulation, stockholm syndrome, swallowing cum from caitlyn's mouth/ spit wc; 2.8k

Footsteps echo in the silent prison, the noise of the cell keys banging furiously trying to open the large, tightly locked door does not go unnoticed; being one of the only things you hear in weeks—possibly months.

Caitlyn enters as a confident, menacing presence—it's a sight you've been seeing more often. eyebrows furrowed visibly; eyes hard and sharp. makes you unconsciously jerk; the chains tightly clasped around your wrists jingle, giving you a reminder that you've already used up all the length of them you had to get around.

You don't remember the last time you spoke to someone other than her; she makes sure you don't.

you shiver when your body is brutally forced to stop by the handcuffs , it hurts— it's your fault, really. you don't know why you even thought about the possibility of you being able to escape, maybe you had a chance to escape when she still let you walk around like a normal human. No handcuffs and nothing, when she let you have your opinion on some things. no matter how small they were. they were still something

“You’re awake,” she murmurs under her breath; raspy and husky voice, she moves towards you who is crouched in the corner of the cell. she raises an eyebrow shyly when you don't dare to look at her and that makes you shrink internally, her eyes scan your body, pupillating dilating while she not-so-subtly—not that she ever thought of being, examines you completely.

“I thought I told one of the enforcers to bring you some panties?” She pondered shameless, more of an answer than a question and oh, how funny she is. acting like you could use more than that as if she didn't soak disgustingly every single pair of panties she gave you with her cum.

You control yourself from scoffing when she runs her fingertips along your rib cage with familiarity, rubbing her thumb over the unblemished skin that is now full of bruises adorning your skin

Caitlyn makes a sound of mock-pity in the back of her throat not even making the effort to look at you. not when she has more important things to take care of “is it too much for you?” she scoffs harshly, her hands slipping between your legs, forcing your thighs open for her, fingers digging into the soft skin of your inner thigh when you don't relax and open up automatically, how you hate her. you hate how she just comes and takes what she wants from you without even caring if you want it, like her doll to use.

Her fingers slip painfully slowly to your pussy, fingers scratching the skin of your stomach in the way. digits rubbing your entrance, you tremble and try to close your thighs, only to receive a firm even painful grip “I've had a really shitty day,” she mutters harshly, “do it the fucking easy way today” The words come out naturally, demanding and without a hint of distress; You frown and continue to force your thighs closed, you don't want this— and Caitlyn seems to notice. of course she notices, Her eyes narrow sharply and her free hand tugs at your chained wrist to pull you closer to her.

Tears prick the corners of your eyes as you blink hard to try to avoid her cold, scolding gaze. Like you're a petulant child throwing a tantrum and not a woman who's tied up for god knows how many days in a cell.

“Are you playing deaf?” Her eyes scan your face, fingers reaching up to firmly grip your chin “Don't make me force myself in there” Her threat is practically spat out in disgust. she hold your jaw in a painful grip, forcing your face to look at her. her day was shit one at the council today. stupid people, paperwork to sign, her head starts to throb just thinking about you opening your mouth to do something other than suck or choke on her fingers.

She squeezes your thigh painfully, forcing you to spread your thighs. her face forming into a visible frown when you hesitate, fingers coming up to cup your cheek, fingers clad in shooting glove, the fabric scratches the soft skin of your cheek gently, her eyes scan your face. she clicks her tongue, mocking you.

her hand is formed in a smooth arc and she strikes you hard across your cheek with her hand, the blow ringing in your ear and the taste of blood in your mouth.

she scoffs softly in the back of her throat and grabs your chin again “I don't like doing it you know.” She coos as she feels tears streaming down your cheeks, poor sensitive thing. her lips press against your flushed cheek. voice like honey— falsely sweet. “No need to cry” she muttered softly but you still can feel the condescension in her voice, cause she rarely has any regrets.

Her hand moves away from your cheek, leaving it inconveniently cold, the fingers slide down again moving to the top of your thigh, drumming her fingers on the skin.

your thighs slowly open(begrudgingly) eliciting a positive hum from her throat. she presses herself against you, the front of her pants pressing against your groin, the fabric rubbing against the sensitive skin, burning in the worst possible way.

her hand slips to your pussy now, gaze going down and eyebrow arching curiously when she sees and feels her glove wet, a cruel giggle echoes as if she finds it funny “Why the tears when you're this wet honey?” she forces two fingers into your tight entrance, insistent fingers when she can't fit two fingers in at once.

“Relax for me”

“Fuck you” you babble, tears still streaming, her shallow display of affection did nothing to calm you. She rolls her eyes out of your line of sight and nuzzles into your throat, breath warming on your skin “Stop being so dramatic like a baby. you can handle more than two fingers. Much more.” She whispers, voice muffled.

Her fingers force their way in, fingers abusing your hole, Your eyes squeeze tightly close as more tears that you don't even notice run down your cheeks. When she can't slid her fingers inside, she pulls her wet fingers away and places them on the front of her pants. She smirk against your neck, her mouth sucking a bruise next to an old one that she made a long time ago

Her slim, thin fingers run over her jeans. a soft sigh leaving her lips, fingers fumbling with the buttons “fuck..” her lips purse into a frown, her fingers open the button of her pants, breathing heavily, she opens her pants, the bulge already appearing in her underwear, tense and frustrating desire. she's been having to put up with fucking zaulnites and slum dwellers for so long, she just needs this.

She sighs, hands gripping her cock behind the damp fabric. is practically transparent now, her tip leaking pre-cum, her hand goes through her waistband and pulls her cock out. The cock jumping out of her underwear, The veins throb with pent-up lust, the tip drools, she runs her thumb over her tip, a sigh leaving her lips. your breathing quickens in a moment when you see it, it's disgusting. you hesitate and sneak off, standing against the old wall

She stops for a second when she feel your movements— or the lack of your cooperation. jaw clenching and eyebrow furrowing, she's mad, she definitely is. she slowly raises her head, looking at you, cold eyes and pupils dilating incessantly, she approaches you and rubs the tip against your entrance, pushing deep, she's forcing it in “Oh poor thing,” she begins, voice still incredibly gentle, and you feel the frustration boiling over “You need to relax, what have I told you about that.” she scolds harshly, gloved fingers coming up to rub your sensitive clit, trying to relax your walls.

You squirm, legs twitching furiously as you feel her tearing you in half, she grabs your waist and slid over your body “no, no, no— leave me” you panic only to have a gloved hand grabbing your mouth and muffling your voice, she leans down to tower over you when you squirm trying to get away from her grip, the veins in her neck throb visibly and she grips you painfully “Stop fucking moving, yeah?” she hissed through her teeth, you could visibly hear the bad mood in her voice. She grabs your arm and presses her hips closer to yours, the pain is agonizing, her cock is so thick. she held you down with her bodyweight as you'd wriggle in attempts to get her off— you're so innocent, you don't even know that turns her on even further.

She can't get over it as you keep trying to get away from her whenever she comes here, as if you didn't want to accept that there was no future for you anymore. You are so stubborn that you make her want to break you again and again

“You're lucky you're so wet” she hums when see more tears flowing and your frowning expression, Her length finally sinks into your tight walls, practically doesn't fit, you're still so tight. the expression of discontent in her face soft as she lets out a sigh at the sight of your face and the tears streaming down

Her head rests on your throat and she finally slides her entire length in, breathing hot and panting. the feeling of her filling you up makes you gasp, your walls stretching to receive her like you always do, her hips move with familiarity. her pelvis slamming against yours, your throat burns as you try to fight back just a little— which is all in vain because her grip on you not soft an inch. Your body shudders with each thrust, her nails dig into your hips. “Just like that.” She sighs when your warmth embraces her length “I missed this pussy” She breathed, rubbing her cheek against your shoulder. which is met with you pulling away from her touch "Don't be so rude to me." She scoffs and sinks in again. teeth nibbling on your neck to emphasize her point, You can feel her in your cervix,

Your body shudders when she speeds up her movements, she takes the entire length of her out and leaves only the tip inside, then slams her dick all the way in. to make sure you feel her stretching you so well, her thrusts into you harder, cock sliding in and out of your pussy with a wet, slick sound. You can feel the muscles in her thighs as she moves, the sound of her breath heavy in the room. You can feel her heartbeat pounding in her chest, body warming up yours as over time

her thrusts become more sloppy and in confusing rhythms, she breathes heavily, soft whimpers are heard as she sinks into your wall. hitting that spongy place inside you that makes you gasp—you don't want to admit it feels good because you hate her, you really do. but you can't lie not when she sees how wet you are.

Her hips move for a few more seconds before sinking as deep inside you as possible. She really does look pathetic sometimes. Sweat dripping, Her mouth hanging open and her body wilting on top of yours, As she fills you with her seed. Her fingers loosen their grip and move to the front of your pussy, Fingering your wet pussy, begging for attention. Something she won't do because she only cares about herself.

She pulls her cock out. Her cum almost spurts out before she sticks two fingers inside. The feeling of her gloved hand inside you makes you squirm as her fingers twist to pull the cum out of you.

Her fingers twist and she pulls a finger smeared with her cum out. And before you know it, she's licking her fingers. A smile spreads across her face as if that doesn't disgust you, She sighs and leaves her fingers clean with nothing on them, Then she brings her hand to your mouth and touches your bottom lip, ordering you to open it. You refuse to do so she digs her fingernail into your lip. Forcing you to open your mouth, which you must do. she smiles and spits into your mouth. The sensation burns your throat with the taste of her cum mixed with her saliva. "Swallow,” “You can't waste it" she teases and rubs your lips as you swallow hard.

“Good girl”

[kingkat12]

pornography (eric draven x reader)

WARNINGS: 18+, foul language, groping/fondling, dry-humping lol, mentions of substance abuse

summary: when you finally talk to Eric Draven in rehab, it doesn't take long before you get drawn together by a force stronger than anything you have ever encountered. it doesn’t help the situation that you eventually find out Eric has been drawing pictures of you… nude

word count: 2,337 PART 1, PART 2, PART 3

a/n: this is for all the girlies like me that just came home from watching The Crow and got their mind blown by how hot Bill was in it... holy fuck. had to write this blurb because I am so shaken up, I can't feel my face. enjoy!! there will be more parts hihi...

"I fucking hate pink," 

I couldn't believe that was the first thing I said to him-- the dark and broody stranger I had been eyeing through my first few weeks in rehab. He stared back at me, confusion swimming in his big green eyes, probably pondering why I had sat down next to him in the cafeteria. "Pardon?"

"It's a little ridiculous," I tried, watching as he put down his cutlery, pushing his food away as he gave me his full attention. Tugging at my pink sweater, which we were all wearing, I let out a nervous chuckle. "Whose idea was it to put a lot of addicts in pink, anyway?"

My eyes darted down to his hands as I waited for his answer-- they were huge up close, and completely covered in tattoos. I hadn't noticed them from afar; I had only noticed the ones peeking through the top of his shirt when he would pass me by in the hall, or the big eye he had on his chest that I had seen while passing by his room. I knew it wasn't nice to peek into his room while he was changing, but I was quite frankly starved of any male contact-- any girl would go crazy in here. 

He eventually shrugged, giving me the answer I least expected; "I guess pink is supposed to be a calming colour. It's not that bad," I watched as the corners of his mouth tugged upwards, giving away hints of amusement. "Aren't you girls supposed to like pink?"

"Maybe," I mumbled, nudging food around on my plate with my fork. "I just don't like to wear it. It doesn't suit me."

The handsome stranger didn't seem to agree, another shrug following accompanied by a shy laugh. "I can't figure out whether you're being sincere or searching for compliments,"

This was most definitely not how I wanted to come off. I straightened up, resting my elbows against the table as I cleared my throat. "I'm just trying to make conversation,"

"... Why?"

"Because you've been staring at me almost as much as I've been staring at you," I put down my fork, hoping he didn't see how nervous I was. In truth, he had been staring-- it wasn't all purely one-sided. I had caught him staring at me in the courtyard, on my way to the shower, and I had also caught him lingering outside my room several times. He would usually leave when I came out, disappearing down the hall with speed I wouldn't even dream to catch up with. 

He finally gave in to a smirk, nodding to himself as he lowered his head. "Sorry," It was clear that he hadn't thought he'd be called out like this. However, something told me he wasn't too upset about being caught either. 

"Don't be," I said, feeling my anxiety ripping through my veins. Why was I indulging? "I just--"

It was at this moment that a guard appeared behind him, yanking him away from the table with a harshness that made me gasp. I clasped my hand over my mouth, watching as he barely reacted to the brutality. 

"Guys and girls eat separately!" the guard yelled at me, slamming his fist down on the table. 

My eyes widened, looking back at the handsome stranger. "But I-- I was the one who sat down here, he didn't do anything!" I protested, watching as the guard grabbed him and led him away. Groaning, I ran my hands through my hair, frustrated with the rules at this place. Why was it so fucking strict?

I eventually looked up just in time to see that the man had managed to turn around, smirking my way; "I'm Eric!" he said, holding back a laugh as he was shoved along the cafeteria for everyone to see.

Despite the horror washing over me for getting him in trouble, I managed to croak out my name as well. It seemed that he appreciated that I had at least tried to stick up for him-- What was it that I had just started?

My question would be answered a lot quicker than I had expected. 

A few days passed, and more looks and stares were exchanged. I was dying to talk to Eric again. I knew I hadn't been sent to rehab to make friends or get feelings for someone, but something was gnawing at me to talk to him again. I wanted to be around him constantly; what was happening to me? I recognized this feeling-- it was the same feeling I got when I really, really craved something... Fuck, how I missed drugs. Maybe Eric was turning into a substitute?

It wasn't often that the door to Eric's room was open, but today it was. I wouldn't have noticed it if I hadn't taken the extra lap around the institute as usual, hoping to get a glimpse of him through the small window in his door. But today, I didn't have to get on my tippytoes to get a look-- there he was, picking up several drawings that had been scattered around the floor. His room looked like a mess, completely unlike how I was used to seeing it through the tiny window. This looked like the result of one of those raids that the prison guards sometimes did when they suspected there were hidden drugs in a patient's room. 

I felt sorry for him; I knew how horrible it could feel to have someone rip through all your stuff. But as I bent down and picked up a few drawings that were at my feet, my lips parted in surprise.

It seemed I wasn't the only one caught off guard; Eric noticed me standing in his doorway, letting out a relieved sigh as he watched me inspect his drawings. He called out my name, leaning against the wall as he sized me up and scanned me, crossing his arms over his chest. 

I cleared my throat; "Is this... me?" I held up the first drawing of the bunch. It was a sketch of me sitting in the courtyard, and I was sure that it was me-- I suppose it was my shock asking for confirmation. 

Eric snickered, kicking off the wall. "Yeah... Sorry,"

"Stop saying sorry," I shuffled through the drawings, finding he had drawn me in multiple settings, and it was clear that I had been watched the few weeks I'd been here. "These are beautiful, Eric... I guess I'm honoured--" My words trailed off as I finally approached the last drawing. Was that...?

He didn't even try to take it away from me. Eric sighed, looking away as his cheeks flushed a light pink, similar to our uniforms. 

Judging by his reaction, I had a feeling he wasn't so against me seeing this. It was a sketch of me, after all-- nude. 

I had to swallow rather hard for anything to go down. I couldn't pinpoint why I wasn't absolutely horrified at this.  "So... this is what you've been up to in here, huh?" There was no stopping the smirk that spread across my lips, holding back a flustered giggle. "This is next-level pervy, do you know that?"

It didn't take long before Eric's big hands ripped the drawings out of my hands, turning away as he shook his head. "Every artist needs a muse, no?"

"A muse? How can I be your muse if we don't know each other?"

"That's not how it works," he mumbled, throwing away the drawings into a heap on the bed. "Your beauty is all I need to get inspired."

This was enough to shock me into silence. I inhaled a sharp breath, stepping into Eric's room despite knowing it was forbidden. "So now you think I'm beautiful?"

Eric hummed, finally turning to meet my eyes. "It hasn't been the biggest secret, has it?" There was something playful about him, shameless, as though it didn't matter to him that I had just found his handmade porn. "It gets a little lonely in here, I guess. These drawings just... run out of me like water. Can't control it."

There was something so unimaginably tantalizing about Eric. Everything about him made me want to jump him then and there-- was it maybe the result of my withdrawals that were turning my brain into further mush? In a normal setting, this would have creeped me out to infinity and beyond, but knowing this was coming from the man I had been lusting after from afar for several weeks made me excuse it in a heartbeat. 

I had no idea what possessed me to close the door to his room and lock it, knowing the repercussions could be severe if we were caught. But Eric didn't seem to mind; his green eyes widened, watching my every move like a hawk.

"It was really pretty and all... The drawing, I mean," I said, inching closer to where he had sat down on the bed. "But would you maybe want some inspiration for the next one?"

Eric's plush, pink lips parted, eyes rounding out in surprise. Despite his shock, his big hands reached out for me as I came closer, and he pulled me in between his legs. I could feel him caressing my back through my shirt, holding me with the utmost gentle touch. "I'll take all I can get," he murmured, looking up at me through his brows, a knowing smirk spreading across his face. 

I let out a giggle as he pressed his lips against my stomach through my shirt, enjoying the intense feeling of someone against my skin again after all this time. Eric pulled away, glancing at the door before slowly trailing his fingers under my shirt, testing the waters. 

It didn't take long before that wasn't enough for him-- my breath hitched as Eric grabbed my waist, pulling me down with him on the bed. I barely had time to think before the euphoric feeling of being kissed engulfed me. Our lips met in an open, soft kiss, almost as though we were scared to break the other if we were too needy or harsh. As I straddled him, I felt his hands tugging at my shirt, dipping back under the fabric once more. His fingers gently ghosted over my lower back, eventually ending up trailing small circles with his thumbs along the underside of my bra. 

If I hadn't been so starved of any human contact in here, I would've never jumped the opportunity like this. But none of us knew how long we had until the guards would bust us, and it only fueled the adrenaline pumping through our veins. Our kisses became desperate, hungry, and I let out a whimper against his lips as he took the liberty of cupping my chest, feeling me up to his heart's delight. I knew I had been waiting for this moment since the first time I saw him, and I wasn't about to let it slip through my fingers-- I decided to let him do whatever he wanted to me, no matter what. 

I could feel Eric's cock twitch beneath me, clearly aroused. It was also at this moment that he made me sit up, tugging my shirt off of me before laying back down to scan me. Was he memorizing my body for his next sketch? It wasn't every night that I had a handsome stranger beneath me like this, so I allowed him to trail his hands up and down my body, lips parting in delight. "Fuck... Yeah, this will do," he murmured, pupils dilating at the sight before him whether he wanted them to or not.

"You sure?" I asked, giggling to myself. My hands rested against his broad chest, letting out a sigh of delight; God, he was sexy. As I shifted in his lap, Eric's breath hitched as I seemingly sat down in the exact right spot. Almost as though he was possessed by instinct for a moment, he grabbed my hips, rocking me against him through the fabric of our clothes. 

Who would've thought I'd be dry-humping this stranger and enjoy it so much? My hands gripped his shirt, a quiet moan spilling past my lips-- I had forgotten this feeling. This was mostly something I did when I was a teenager, before I figured out how to have proper sex with my high school boyfriend. But it felt so damn fucking good, desperate; it didn't take long before I leaned back down, capturing his plush lips in another kiss. 

I craved him like water. I wanted him against me, in me, for him to take me in every possible position ever-- a deep, dark part of me knew I would be insatiable from now on. 

But our moment of ecstasy was interrupted when a guard started banging his fist against the door, his muffled yells barely registering through my arousal. Despite my dazed state, it didn't take me long to drape my shirt back on, climbing off Eric with wobbly knees. "Shit," I mumbled, turning to him with wide eyes. "I'm screwed. We're screwed."

Everything about him was so damn beautiful. The kiss-swollen lips definitely didn't help how gorgeous I thought he looked right now. Despite the situation, knowing we were in deep shit, Eric let out a soft chuckle; "I don't think you're screwed enough, actually. We'll get to that another time," 

My eyes widened as I gave into a light giggle. There was no way this was happening-- had my naughty rehab dreams come true? The guard banging against the door was drowned out by the incessant ringing in my ears that festered through my mind as Eric leaned down to kiss me one last time; "I hope to see you around, if they don't kill us,"

"Yeah," I breathed, only now realizing how tall he was as I looked up to meet his gaze. This man was towering over me. Holy shit. "Can't wait to see your next masterpiece."

I couldn't wait. I really couldn't.

(a/n: PART 2, PART 3 here!! enjoy<33)

[district4loading]

Lazy Days

Twice Mina x Male Reader

4K Words

Content Warning: Smut, Fluff

Minors DNI

A/N: This is another request I received almost a month ago. I really hate that it took me so long to get to it especially because it isn't even that long. It's probably cause for the past few weeks I've been stressed and I've had bad headaches which really killed my motivation lol.

Anyways enough of my bitching, I really enjoyed writing this one cause Mina's been wrecking me lately so I hope you guys like it.

-

"You let me win, didn't you?"

-

"There's no way" You blink, your entire body running stiff as you watch the small pixelated character you created maybe four hours ago shrivel up and die in one of the worst ways imaginable. In the same instance you glance over to your girlfriend Mina, who's sitting right next to you on the couch. Although she doesn't look at you, you can see the smirk on her face and you begin to process that she just beat you. Again. "You've gotta be cheating!" You accuse, pressing the respawn button on your controller.

"No" She insists cutely with her whiny tone of voice "I'm just better than you" The simple shrug of her shoulders has you a bit salty. 

It's been like this all day. You both had today off, so really and truly there was no better way to spend it than to sit around all day playing video games. Truth be told, you were never a gamer before you met Mina. When she moved in with you, she brought her console too and you slowly went from watching her play occasionally to playing with her and even more than her sometimes.

"Yeah right, one more game" You run a hand through your messy hair.

Mina loves how stubborn you are, she sees it as one of your cutest traits. She just knows that although you say "one more game" you really mean "we'll play until I beat you" and it's even funnier that you refuse to admit that part.

Sure enough you end up playing four rounds instead of the 'one' you spoke of earlier "Don't you think we should be doing something else?" Mina mutters, reluctantly pressing the button for a rematch when you lose again. She glances at the time, noticing that you two have been at this all morning and it was just bleeding into the afternoon.

"Like what?" You bite your lip subconsciously, something you always did when you were trying to focus. 

"I dunno, you hungry? We could order something, watch tv, maybe go out later.." She suggests, but you barely hear any of it because not even a second after she finishes her sentence, you manage to finally beat her in the combat game. 

"Ha! See? You're not better than me, look I just beat you" You stand up and point to the tv. Mina only puts her controller to the side and she smiles at you calmly, nodding. It doesn't really matter to you in the moment that you've played maybe a total of sixteen matches, four of which you actually won. You silently appreciate her for not bringing up that part either. "Okay, what were you saying?" You turn off the console and plop back down on the couch.

"Maybe" She looks like she's actually thinking for a moment, then in the same instance she kind of stops and she gets this look on her face. An almost devilish smirk replaces her pondering pout and you're almost immediately intrigued about what's to come "I should give you a reward for winning"

She only has to scoot closer to you and lean her head in a few inches to catch your lips on hers. You kiss her back, hands on her waist so you can pull her to sit on your lap. "What kind of reward?" You decide to humor her cause why not and she can't hide her giggles when she presses on your shoulder to get you to lay back.

"Just lay down" Mina's voice is so wonderfully soft, almost healing to your ears when she says the three words. You first prop one of the throw pillows up against the armrest and you rest your head against it. Still in your lap, Mina leans down to put her lips back on yours and you can't get enough of them. So smooth and tender as you make out in your cozy living room.

When Mina pulls away, she shuffles backwards a bit and with the space she has, she lays flat on her belly between your legs. It's a big couch so she's able to fit there nice and comfy, arms resting on your thighs as she tugs on the waistband of your shorts and you lift your hips to help her out.

 "You let me win, didn't you?" You figure

"Well, how else was I supposed to get your cock in my mouth?" She teases, pulling the garments off your legs. Your cock springs free from its confinements, semi-hard from the bit of kissing you did earlier. 

"You could've just a-asked—" Your tone of voice changes mid-way when Mina wraps her lips around your head, her moist inner cheeks wonderfully stimulating each nerve. 

She releases you with a subtle pop then she curls her fingers around your shaft, stroking up and down. "Where's the fun in that" The way she giggles feels a little more sinister and it genuinely sends a chill down your spine as you grow harder and harder in her hands. 

Mina leans over, sticking her tongue out to flick it against your tip "God" You bite your lip, forgetting to breathe while you make eye contact. It's like there's a greater force gluing your eyes to her making it impossible for you to look away. When she's got your cock at it's hardest—which doesn't take very long at all—she opens her mouth and takes you inside.

The descent is slow and easy for her for the first few inches. She starts to struggle the further she gets down and you're unable to focus on anything but the warmth of her mouth, the saliva coating your entire shaft and the tight squeeze her mouth gives your cock whenever she gags or swallows. It has your jaw clenching already. 

You grasp your t-shirt in your hands then you pull it over your head, stretching the cheap fabric a bit because you were rushing. "Mina" You sigh, as she gets her lips to touch your base. Tears welled up in her pretty eyes. They threaten to fall as she holds herself there and the absolute clutch of her throat is nearly perfect. 

First she has to remind herself to breathe through her nose before she comes up. Mina stops when she reaches the head then she plunges again, sliding your cock down the slot of her throat easier this time around. She manages to get herself in a rhythm, cheeks hollowed as she sucks you off, tongue dragging up and down the underside of your cock. "You're so good at that" You praise, lips parted as you take in the wonderful view.

Mina's so beautiful, you could spend hours just admiring her face, scanning each beauty mark and every subtle blemish on her porcelain skin. "So pretty" You whisper and she hums softly to let you know that she acknowledges your compliment. There's more you want to say but the words get caught up and stuck in your throat because she's got you speechless right now. As her eyes pierce through yours, you hope that she can understand at least a fragment of the love you feel for her in this moment. "I love you" You groan the confession like it's the first time you're saying it.

She comes back up, licking her lips as she wraps her hand around your base. She strokes you slowly and softly, that same shy giggle escaping her lips and you get high on it. "I love you more" Her tongue darts out to lick up the pre cum that's beginning to dribble down your shaft. Then she rubs the pad of her thumb in circles on your frenulum.

A moan escapes your lips and your body begins to squirm as she attacks the sensitive spot there. You have to bite your lip to stop yourself from whimpering. She fists your cock again, then chases it with her mouth up and down with the twist of her wrists. 

You reach your hand out, running your fingers through her newly dyed ash hair and you brush it to the side when you notice that it was getting in the way. Her hand and her mouth moves together fast and you're not sure how much longer you'll be able to take it for. The way she can have your body almost trembling under her magical touch will always amaze you, no matter how many times she does this.

"M-Mina I'm close—fuck" You warn but she won't slow or stop. In fact, she's squeezing and sucking harder like she needs your load in her mouth as soon as possible. You know she'll swallow it all.

You end up biting into your fist, eyes squinting as your brows knit together right up until you cum. "Shit, I'm gonna.." Your cock pulses out the first few shots which hit the roof of Mina's mouth. She isn't at all phased by it though, in fact, she keeps her movements steady as she milks you for everything you've got, moaning eagerly at the taste. You finish it all off with a sigh and then she finally stops, taking you out of her mouth carefully so nothing spills out. 

Mina opens her mouth, proudly showing you the flood of semen thats pooled up inside where it belongs. Then she closes her lips together and she stops for a moment before she gulps it down. "You're amazing" You pant, watching weakly as she climbs up your body so you're face to face. She smiles before connecting your lips and your hands go to the hem of her top almost immediately and you slip them under just to feel her soft, bare skin on your hands.

She breaks the kiss, then she pulls her top off and her petite breasts are finally free "These too" You pull at the clingy fabric of her leggings, hearing the light noise it makes when it snaps back. 

"You ready for me already babe?" 

"You know I am" a smile grows on her face as she stands up from the couch to shimmy herself out of them, her hips swaying side to side with a naughty purpose. Finally, she steps out of them and kicks them to the side "Wait, leave them on" she stops just as she's about to take her panties off. She's wearing this black lacy underwear that clings to her ass so beautifully, it'd be a crime to remove them when they look so good on her.

Mina only shakes her head, a chuckle escaping her lips as she straddles you again "You're such a weirdo" She mutters, not giving you the chance to respond because she's making out with you again. This kiss lasts a little bit longer because you want to take your time with her perfect lips, sucking and licking on them as it gets sloppier. She begins moaning into your mouth because of the pressure your hard cock provides while it's pushed up against her cunt. "Fuck" She curses, lightly biting your lip as she grinds her hips forwards.

She reaches down, kissing you harder this time as she slides her dampened panties to the side because she doesn't want to spend another second empty. Mina has to hover a bit as she grabs your cock to aim the head with her slick entrance but she's so soaked that it ends up slipping past. You try not to, but you end up snickering and she glares at you before trying again. This time she gets it in, you know that much from the first feel of her tight cunt gripping the head. 

You both exhale deeply as Mina sinks herself down slowly, taking this opportunity to enjoy the stretch of your thick cock. When she's got you stuffed as deep as the position would allow, Mina picks up her hips and begins to rock forwards in slow motions. "So deep in me, it feels so good ah~"

The way Mina moves her body so smooth and fluid has you falling in love with her all over again. You let a harsh slap land on her round ass, hearing the sound of the sharp impact echo loudly in your living room. She yelps loudly, leaning over to hold herself up on your shoulders so she can move faster. Her warm walls hug you tightly, occasionally clenching when she closes the gap between you two. Your cock fits so perfectly inside of her, it's like you were made for each other.

"Mina" You moan once she begins to move her hips in a circular motion. It feels so insane that now you're gripping her ass tightly, probably leaving red hand marks on her pale skin. 

"Like that?" Mina smirks, looking deep into your hooded eyes moaning when your cock brushes past her g-spot. She puts her hands over yours, then guides them both up to her perky tits. You feel her stiff nipples poking your palms as you take the initiative to squeeze and knead the soft flesh thoroughly. "God your cock—it's so" She moans again, throwing her head back so her hair flys out of her face.

This is the perfect visual. Mina's god-like body on top of yours, every dangerous and deadly curve of hers highlighted with the sheet of sweat on her skin. Her eyes closed and her mouth wide open as she moans about how good your dick is, how she can ride it all day long and how it's tearing her apart among another mess of words you can't really make out. You listen good and well to everything she's saying because she absolutely means it, you can tell that much from the utter lust in her tone.

Mina lets herself loose on you like she's been thinking about it all day, thinking about how you'll fill and fuck her with your large cock. You're only able to watch as the subtle indicators begin to show themselves. Like when her moans go up an octave or when her movements become less calculated and more messy and feral. You also notice the way she leans down, capturing your lips once more and you can tell it's a silent plea for you to do something.

So that's exactly what you do. You hold her in place by her hips and you begin to piston your cock into her, your thighs meeting hers to make this thick meaty slapping noise. She nearly screams, unable to focus on kissing you when you're fucking her like this. "Yes! Fuck- Harder!" So much raw force, it's almost punishing. However, your purpose wasn't to "punish" her, it was more so to reward her for everything she did beforehand. 

She understands that.

When Mina buries her head into your neck, you're a hundred percent sure that you've got her right there. She breathes heavily into your skin, moaning and choking on her words with each deep thrust you give her. She hums loud and long "I'm cumming!" and then you begin to feel how tightly her cunt clenches and pulses around your cock as her wetness spills down your shaft. "Fuck- Yes baby!" She begins to shake, her body jerking and bucking in your grip.

With a long sigh, she stops calms down a bit, the aftershocks still causing her body to react occasionally. You give her maybe a second to recover before you slip your cock out of her and flip her so she's on her back. She's so out of it, she doesn't even realize that you've switched positions until you slide your cock back inside of her where it belongs. Mina gasps, feeling your cock reach different parts of her at this angle.

"I can't fucking-" What she's trying to say is that she can't believe that you're fucking her so good. Hard and deep. That's exactly how she likes it as you recall, and you've hardly even given her a moment to recover from the orgasm you just fucked her through. "Cum in me" she looks deep into your eyes when she says it and she's so serious about it.

You lean down, your temple to hers as you nearly fuck her through the couch. You're a little rough on her, you know that because you can hear the springs in the furniture starting to give. It's not really built for this kind of treatment but it's durable and it's been through worse than this.

The more your cock slides in and out of her, dragging all the way back to the tip only to bury itself into her again, the more animalistic you feel. It's the tight grip, her velvety walls and her hoarse voice moaning your name that's got you like this. You want nothing more than to empty your balls inside of Mina, fill her up and keep it lodged so deep that none of it spills out.

You barely even notice when you push her into another orgasm because you're too focused on that distinct feeling growing and burning like a hot ball of fire in the pit of your stomach. "Oh... I'm gonna cum" You grit through your teeth, voice rough just before you nearly growl as you cum again, shooting countless ropes of warm white into her stretched cunt. She gasps, legs shaking as you continue to pound deep and slow into her, making sure you get everything out.

"Yeah, give me everything baby" She coos, fingers interlocking at the back of your neck. 

With a sigh your body finally relaxes and you put all of your weight on her body. When you're finally ready to talk after the long moment of silence you spend in your post-orgasm daze you lift your head and look into Mina's eyes. You know she's expecting your usual "I love you" after sex but instead you decide to mess with her a bit "So... pizza?"

She blinks "What?"

"Earlier you mentioned that we could order something and watch TV, right? I was just suggesting that we get pizza" She gives you an expecting look, like she's not going to give you a straight answer until you tell her what she really wants to hear "and I love you" You add on, leaning down to connect your lips with a grin on your face.

She can't help it when she smiles "Okay pizza then" she agrees.

-

You begin to think that maybe it wasn't the smartest idea to order pizza right before getting in the shower because you're both just stepping out when you hear the doorbell ring. Mina wraps her towel around her body "Well you're gonna have to get it cause I'm naked" She nods to herself as if there wasn't a towel wrapped around your waist also.

"So am I?" You try to argue as she walks into your bedroom. Her calm silence says enough and you figure you should just get the food cause you definitely won't win that fight. When you open the door, the delivery guy looks at you a little weird but you still tip him generously and mutter a small "thank you" at the end of the exchange.

When you get back in your shared apartment, you place the pizza on the coffee table and you turn off the lights before you join her in the bedroom to get into something comfy. 

"I can't believe you're making me watch this" Mina snuggles herself against you, squinting a bit to read the description of the show on the tv screen. You're cuddling and eating on the couch, yes the same couch you just fucked on, it's multi-purpose. You snicker at your own joke before realizing what she's just said.

"So you're genuinely telling me, you didn't enjoy the first season?" You ask, taking a bite of your pizza. It's only got pepperoni on it but it's a classic nonetheless.

Mina shakes her head "No I hated it actually" She corrects you, turning her head with her mouth open. You move your hand away, catching that she's trying to eat your food. She only whines, giving you those adorable eyes.

"There's like seven more slices right there, why do you want to eat mine" You point to it, nodding your head in the direction of the small table before you pick up the remote to play the show. 

It's Squid Game 2 that you're watching as you allow Mina to take a rather large bite of your pizza anyways, despite giving her a hard time about it. "I didn't wanna move" She says as she chews.

"Sure" You scoff, acting like you didn't absolutely love feeding her. Just babying Mina in general is one of your favorite things to do with her. She knows that from the way you swipe off a bit of tomato sauce from the corner of her lip but she fails to bring it up because she too enjoys it.

See there's nothing better than a lazy day in your book. It may have been really unproductive, but sometimes a little bit of a recharge with the person you love the most is the little boost you need to make the most of the following week.

Lazy days are good days

[fairytaleendingss]

Room for One More?

Chapter 11

Summary: James has had time to think during the days he'd been away and through this, has come to a shocking revelation.

CW: Swearing, creepy man being unnerving (nothing inappropriate happens though).

Pairing: Poly!Marauders x fem!reader

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10

This is a shorter one but I just wanted to get something out. I have more of a solid plan now of what I want to happen next to stay tuned for some more updates soon!

--

You started to feel better over the next few days. Remus checked on you periodically to make sure you were making progress while Sirius hovered awkwardly, not quite sure what he was supposed to do whenever the two of you happened to be in the same vicinity.

You weren't sure what had come over him recently, but things between the two of you had been stilted to say the least.

By Wednesday you were back on your feet and back at work, meaning Remus' job was done, however, you desperately hoped that things between the two of you would continue to be civil in the aftermath. Who knows? Maybe you'd even become friends.

James was also getting home from his trip today and you were bubbling with a combination of nerves and excitement. You'd found yourself missing him while he was away. Everything had been strange, to say the least and James was the person out of all your roommates who you were the most comfortable around by far. He just had this light energy about him that was able to balance everything out around your house and without it, things had just felt off. You couldn't quite place your finger on what it was but James Potter just had a way of putting you at ease.

Although, you couldn't help but feel slightly guilty for wanting him there for your own selfish purposes. You knew things had been particularly rough for him after the revelation at New Years and you knew he needed this time to get away from everything and clear his head.

You pondered this concept as you sat back in your desk chair, pen pressed into your cheek and eyes gazing off to nowhere. When did things become so complicated? you thought to yourself.

"Whatcha thinking about?" Mary sang, sliding across the linoleum office floor on her own chair. Mary was always pretty but you took note of it today in particular. Her hair was pulled up on top of her head in a tidy bun and she had a burgundy lipstick on, one that was a departure from the usual neutral tones she went for at work.

You raised a brow at her, choosing to pass by her question.

"You look lovely. Got plans tonight?"

Mary bit her lip as she often did when she was excited.

"It's Lily and I's four month anniversary tonight! I know it sounds silly to celebrate it but if I'm being honest, it's kind of a big deal! Today marks the longest official relationship I've been in!"

"Oh my gosh! Mary, that's wonderful!" you chirped. Then you paused. "Hold on, what do you mean 'official relationship'?"

Mary sighed. "Well, technically there was this guy in high school that I talked to for like a year over Snapchat but he lived in America and we never met in person so it doesn't really count."

You rolled your eyes at her fondly. "You had an internet boyfriend?"

She gave you a gentle slap on the shoulder. "What? I was like fourteen!"

"Okay, fine. Whatever. Congratulations anyway," you replied.

"Thanks girl! Now tell me," she scooted forward slightly on her chair, leaning in as if to share a secret. "What's going on with you and Sirius?"

You sighed thickly. "Unfortunately, there's nothing to tell."

"Really?" she looked surprised. "So you still haven't talked about anything that happened on New Years... or you know, before that?"

You shook your head. "Nope. In fact, honestly, we've barely talked at all recently. It's like he's avoiding me or something."

"That's is odd," Mary muttered. "I mean Sirius isn't usually known for being subtle. For some reason I had it in my head that maybe he would've gone all prince charming and come to your aid while you were ill," she chuckled.

"Ha! No, none of that. Every time we were in the same room, he'd just stare at me like I had two heads and then stutter out some excuse to rush away."

Mary let out a genuine laugh at this. "Yeah, actually that does sound like him. He's uh, not really much of a caretaker."

"No. Well, actually, it was... um, Remus who ended up doing most of the caretaking," you muttered bashfully.

Her eyebrows shot up like rockets. "I'm sorry, WHAT? Did I just hear you say Remus, the man that supposedly can't stand you, looked after you while you were unwell this last week?"

You shrugged but you couldn't deny the way your cheeks warmed at the thought. "He was quite wonderful actually."

A playful smirk overtook her. "Yeah, I bet he was. What? Did he like, bring you soup, and stroke your hair until you fell asleep?"

"Shut up," you joked. "You read too many romance novels."

"Hey! It's not my fault that you're living out the plot of New Girl!"

"You know, it actually kind of is, right?"

She shrugged. "Well, maybe that was the plan all along. I think Remus would definitely be Nick-"

"Anyway," you stated pointedly, before her comparison could get too deep. "You should probably get going. It's after 5 and you don't want to be late for your special date tonight!"

"Oh, shit! You're right," she exclaimed, jumping from her chair and racing to grab her coat.

You chuckled to yourself as you watcher her scramble for her things, calling out a hurried "goodbye" as she headed for the exit.

You took your time packing up that night, both having nowhere to be and also not looking forward to going home. You wondered if maybe Sirius would be out working tonight but you doubted it since James was supposed to have arrived home today and you suspected they'd want to spend some time together.

"Are you heading off now then?"

You abruptly turned on your heel, eyes wide as you noticed Glenn standing closely behind you. You hated when he did that. He was always creeping up on you when you were distracted.

You gave him an awkward smile, hoping he would say a quick goodbye and then leave you be.

He returned the gesture broadly, flashing his perfectly pearly white teeth in a way that you could tell usually worked to make girls swoon. It didn't, however, work so well on you.

"Yeah. Just finishing up now."

He nodded thoughtfully. "Ah. Well I see that Mary has made an early exit. Do you need some company walking out?"

You cringed internally. There was something just so artificial about him. Like he was constantly putting on an act, displaying qualities that he thought people liked to see. But you could see right through it and honestly, it left a bad taste in your mouth.

"That's very kind but I'm okay by myself."

He shook his head stubbornly. "Nonsense! What kind of gentleman would I be if I let you go alone in the cold?"

You restrained yourself from rolling your eyes. Clearly it wasn't going to be so easy to shake him off.

"Okay, then," you relented unwittingly. "Lets go."

The walk from your office on the seventh floor down to the front exit was particularly awkward. Glenn hovered at your side, not saying much but just sending you that unnerving smile of his every so often. As you approached the front steps, you were more then relieved to see a familiar figure waiting by the door.

"James! What are you doing here?"

He looked up from his phone, flashing you a genuine grin, one that made your heart feel warm, instead of causing bile to want to rise in your throat the way Glenn's did.

"Hey!"

He approached with rapid footsteps, engulfing you in his warm arms. You relaxed into his hold for a moment, savoring the feeling.

You pulled away at the sound of a throat clearing beside you. Glenn was looking between the two of you with an unreadable expression.

"Oh! Sorry," James corrected himself, only then noticing the other man. "I'm James, Y/n's roommate. Nice to meet you."

He stuck a hand out towards Glenn, which the latter man shook with a reluctant hesitation.

"Glenn Mulciber. We work together."

You didn't like the way the man was looking at James, something akin to jealously flashing across his eyes in a way that made your skin crawl.

"Well, thanks for walking me out, Glenn but James and I'd better be going. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, right. Okay," was all he said before he turned on his heel and stalked away, his demeanor suddenly very cold.

"Well, he's an odd sort of person," James observed as the two of you began the journey home.

"I'm not a fan of his, to tell you the truth," you responded. "He's weird. He kind of creeps me out."

"Hmm," James muttered thoughtfully, although you could tell his mind was elsewhere.

"You don't have to keep coming to pick me up from work, you know? I'm perfectly capable of making it home myself."

James shrugged. "I know, I just like spending time with you."

You felt your heart swim at his words and had to turn your gaze away from him in the hopes that he wouldn't see the embarrassment on your face.

"Well, um... how was your trip?"

"Good. Yeah. It was good."

He was fiddling with the hem of his coat, looking vaguely off into the distance as he spoke to you. Something seemed off about him. You furrowed your eyebrows, wondering what was going on.

"Is everything okay?" you questioned. "You seem nervous or something."

"Um, well," he hesitated for a moment before turning to face you. "Actually, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

You felt your heart sink into your stomach as a slew of worst case scenarios began to run through your mind. You did your best to keep composed.

"Okay, what's up?"

James released a heavy breath as if he was preparing himself for the words to follow.

"So, while I was away, I had a lot of time to think about things,"

"What kinds of things?"

"Well, you know, just everything that's been going on. When I found out about Lily and Mary back on New Years Eve, I was heartbroken..."

You sighed feeling a rush of sympathy. "Yeah, James about that, I'm really sorry. You shouldn't have had to find out that way, I-"

"No! No, it's okay!" he interrupted. "What I was going to say was actually that I was heartbroken at first. But then the more I thought about it, the more I realised, I've been in love with Lily for so long that I think at some point I just started to like the idea of us together more than I actually liked her, if that makes sense."

You sent him a look of confusion.

"That's not to say I don't like her of course," he rushed to amend. "She's a great friend and obviously she's beautiful and a wonderful person and all that but I think that I just got so comfortable with wanting her that I didn't realise when I didn't really want her anymore..."

You couldn't help but chuckle at the boy’s rambling. "James, what are you trying to say?"

Then he stopped walking suddenly and you followed suit. He turned to look at you then, his face serious and eyes ablaze with an unfamiliar friction.

"I think what I'm trying to say is... that night made me realise that I have feelings for someone else."

In that moment, despite the cold of the street, heat began to swirl around you. You felt energy of an unknown source drawing you together in a magnetic pull as James gazed down at you with a look of yearning clouding his dark eyes. Your heart stuttered in your chest as you looked up at him. Your eyes raked over every inch of his face; his sweet smile, the dimples in his cheeks, the stupid curls that he couldn't contain no matter how hard he tried. He was beautiful.

Then, without warning, he leaned in and your lips connected.

It was like the world faded around you. The noise of the cars and the crowds and the hustle and bustle of London in the evening, all just melted away. You didn't care that you were standing in the middle of the street, with icy tendrils of wind piercing your skin. You didn't care that you had a rock in your shoe or that your hair was blowing in your face. In that moment, all you cared about was him and the feeling of his soft lips against yours.

It wasn't desperate and passionate the way it had been with Sirius. No, James' kiss was sweeter, gentler, filled with warmth and comfort just like he was.

When you pulled back, James had a playful smirk on his face. He licked his lips, looking down at you affectionately as he used a finger to push his glasses up on his nose.

"So," he muttered. "Will you go out with me, then?"

You rolled your eyes. "Of course I will, you idiot."

He laughed a little and intertwined your fingers with his own.

"Okay good. I just wanted to make sure."

You scoffed as you began to walk once more, hand in hand and smiles painted on your swollen lips.

--

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[wileys-russo]

Alessia Russo, "i want you, nobody else" at a party

prized cow II a.russo

"what about her? or him? or her? or her? or him?" you rolled your eyes at the younger girls insistent pointing, smacking her hand down and shaking your head.

"none of them?" vic gasped in shock, two drinks too many having her squinting up at you as you couldn't help but chuckle. "no shock you're single mate, standards are too high." kyra added on with a tut as you shoved her where you were stuck sat between them.

"its not them-" "-its you!" kyra and vic chimed out in sync, sharing a look and bursting out laughing causing your cheeks to heat up bright red. "shut up! i'm not that predictable. am i?" you mumbled, necking your drink as the dutch beside you patted your leg.

"you are." both of them spoke in sync again, their loud rambunctious laughter having you wince, thankfully drowned out by the thundering bass pumping in the club you'd all met up at for katies birthday.

thing one and thing two still continuing on their mission to hook you up with a stranger, something you'd long given up begging them to stop, you caught lia's eye across the room as she glanced over, giving her a pleading look which had her lips curling in amusement.

"you two!" the girls beside you fell silent as the swiss appeared, giving them a stern look and pointing her thumb behind her, how quickly vic and kyra cleared off making you grin as lia replaced them sitting beside you.

"what is wrong hm? you have been sat here all night!" lia questioned as you snaked a mouthful of her drink before she snatched it away. "i have not! i was dancing with your girlfriend and laia just ten minutes ago. the girlfriend you haven't even told half the team about!" you teased as she gave you a look.

"stop deflecting." "i am not!"

another look.

"fine. i'm just sick of everyone trying to set me up with someone, why won't they just mind their own business and leave my love life to me?" you huffed moodily, crossing one leg over the other and exhaling.

"they're just trying to help-" "i don't need help! i'm happy, i am." you pushed with a frown, lia slinging an arm over you as you sighed and leaned into her.

"i will have a word to the girls about backing off." the older girl murmured, pinching your cheek as a small smile crept back onto your face. "thank you." you gave her a side hug, a sense of relief beginning to settle in.

"besides. i already told you, ana is single!" you leapt away from the swiss with a grimace on your face. "lia!" you huffed in betrayal as she grinned, downing the last of her drink.

"only joking." she assured patting your knee and starting to stand to head over to the bar. "you are not her type anyway!" the swiss winked, disappearing to grab another drink as you shouted after her and flipped her off.

catching kyra and vic speaking to rosa you noticed all three seemed to be trying to sneak glances over to you, and not wanting to wait around and see what they were plotting you quickly stood and made a beeline toward the bathroom.

once inside you exhaled heavily, the moment the door slammed behind you the quiet that followed much needed to help you clear your head as you started toward the sink.

before you could even take another breath the door banged open again, a blonde blur zooming through and slamming it closed after herself as bright blue eyes met yours.

"hi." "hi."

you couldn't help but smile as you noticed the slight blush on her cheeks, the same you could feel creeping up the back of your neck as she stepped closer.

"i feel like i haven't seen you all night." alessia pondered, her fingers nudging yours where your arm by your side and you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel the bolts of electricity which shot up at your arm at her touch.

"i've been avoiding you." you spoke bluntly, her face falling before she noticed your grin and her eyes rolled. "hilarious." she muttered sarcastically, shoving you and smiling down at the floor as the pair of you stood side by side leant against the sink.

"has kyra been bothering you?" alessia questioned softly, and you could feel her concerned gaze pan over the side of your face but as soon as you turned to look back at her it was trained to the floor again.

"jealous?" you smiled softly, bumping your shoulder gently into hers, your fingers now brushing against hers where your hands hung side by side, pinkies slowly intertwining making butterflies flutter in your stomach.

"no!" alessia answered quickly, the two of you finally sharing a look and a grin before returning your gazes to the tiled floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the room.

"she's been trying to sell me off like a prized cow, vic too." you chuckled, the electricity bolts returning as alessia now properly took your hand in hers.

"well now i'm jealous." alessia admitted quietly though you didn't miss the way her lips curled upward. "should be, i'm worth a fair bit of money russo." you teased softly, squeezing her hand and bumping your hip into hers again.

"oh i know. who went shopping with you yesterday?" alessia challenged looking up as you scoffed. "i told you i would pay for my own stuff! but you-" you started to argue, a laugh and a pair of very familiar lips shutting you up as they pressed against yours.

"we could just tell them about us." you were again caught off guard by the words that followed, alessia's taller form caging you in against the counter you were pressed against, pulling away and speaking up.

"i thought you weren't ready yet? there's no pressure less, i know i said that stuff about kyra but-" again, cut off with pale pink lips moving against yours.

"well i've been thinking about it and we could start with just a few of our close friends, our parents have kept it hush." your girlfriend mused making you smile, her hand dropping yours as they both settled on your hips, yours winding around her neck.

"our friends mouths are much bigger than our families." you reminded with a snicker of amusement making the blonde chuckle. "well we have to start somewhere, and i think i'm ready. if you are!" alessia clarified quickly, worry flickering momentarily through her eyes as you nodded.

"i am. this is still...new, but i like it." you assured with a nod, pecking her lips twice and enjoying the way the tips of her ears reddened.

"new? babe its been two months!" alessia laughed as you rolled your eyes which flickered to the door as you thought you heard it open but it stayed closed.

"maybe, but its your first time dating a girl!" you reminded poking her nose as she rolled her eyes but nodded, unable to argue the fact that all of this had indeed been something new for the pair of you.

"well i am ready, at least for a few of the girls to know. i want you, nobody else." alessia assured as you blushed and she beamed, kissing your flushed cheeks.

"and then maybe they'll stop trying to sell you off like a prized cow." your girlfriend teased as you gasped, opening your mouth to tell her off but once more your words were swallowed by her lips locking with yours.

"you can't just kiss me to shut me up whenever you want you know?" "oh no? watch me."

[hoonieyun]

this is where it ends ⋆˙⟡♡

days of dodging your boyfriend after your fight finally lead you to the answer you've been looking for (read part one here) heeseung 𐐪♡𐑂 jongseong 𐐪♡𐑂 jaeyun 𐐪♡𐑂 sunghoon genre: aaaaangsttttt!!! angst!! heartbreak.. OOF warnings: toxic relationship, bad coping mechanisms, profanity, mentions of drinking as an addiction, gaslighting, arguing, 18+

hoonieyun notes: WHEW... lowkey was like.. damn this shit is TOO angsty so sorry in advance but im obsessed with angst lately and watching xo kitty did not help because that show was a rollercoaster LMAO anyways i hope you guys enjoy this sad piece of work because i have more coming with my vday anthology and exes reunited series plus! i've just announced my 1k follower special!

𐐪♡𐑂 @pagemiah @jiiyen @jnysaln @xh01bri @rairaiblog @laurradoesloveu @17ericas @manaah02 @heeseung64 @zorange13 @heartheejake @cloud-lyy @heeweenie @jakesimfromstatefarm @lovelymelon @1-itsneverthatserious-1 @anushkaaaiaiiaiaia

@chvconn3 @heeheeyeoiizz01 @pjselee @malloryaloisia @alienqbrain @jooniesbears-blog @haeeeeefer @firstclassjaylee

heeseung ⋆˚ʚɞ

it had been 3 days since you left heeseung standing in your apartment, dumbfounded and unsure of where you were. you really had hoped he would run after you that night but he didn’t and that seemed to put the nail in the coffin for you. 

were you ready to throw away your relationship all because of this? 

was it worth it to lose the person you love? 

you had pondered on so many questions since that night and each question felt like you were guilt tripping yourself into thinking that your own feelings weren’t valid, like you were trying to convince yourself that you were overreacting and that heeseung was right. 

why were you being so annoying?

but these questions only led to more questions instead of answers.

were you being annoying or were you just tired of not being heard? 

if you hadn’t been the one to constantly ask him to clean up after himself would he have done it on his own? 

why were you trying to come up with reasons to talk yourself back into his arms when you truly knew deep down the answer you were looking for…

you just weren’t ready to come to terms with it. 

so here you were, hurriedly packing what you could before heeseung could come home. and just to your luck, he had arrived much earlier than you anticipated. “yn?” heeseungs says, shock painted across his face as he sees you standing in the hallway with a box of your things. 

“wh- what are you doing?” he asks, eyes falling on the box in your hands. 

both of you knew the answer to that. 

“i think- i can’t do this anymore, hee… 

i did a lot of thinking these past fews days and everything i thought of i found myself trying to make excuses for you. trying to figure out why i was acting this way and why i was going out of my way to make it seem like i was the one causing these issues and stressing myself out and then i realized… 

why was i trying to compromise my own happiness and well being for someone who didn’t care about me? 

for someone who couldn’t simply understand where i was coming from and couldn’t even listen to me when all i would ask for was something so easy as to clean up after yourself. 

heeseung, you’re grown and so am i and i’m done acting like your words and actions don’t hurt solely for the fact that i don’t want to lose you. 

we’re over.” your eyes had tears pooling in them but you refused to let them fall in front of heeseung. 

“what?” heeseung asks, slipping his shoes off and running over to you in an attempt to stop you, reaching for the box but you move out of the way before he can. 

“yn.. can we please talk about this? don’t jump to conclusions just because you’re hurt. this isn’t what you want, what about us? 

are you willing to throw us away because of some petty fight?” and that’s when you knew that you and heeseung weren’t on the same page… at all. 

“that’s what you have to say?” and at this point you had lost the fight to stop the tears from falling. 

“you haven’t even apologized? and now you’re here trying to gaslight me into thinking that what i’m feeling is just the result of a petty fight? 

hee, you never listen to me. you dismissed my feelings and all i asked was you clean up our bedroom because i was tired. i’m sorry but if that was such a hard task then i don’t know what to tell you. 

i’m not jumping to conclusions. heeseung, we’re done.” you say, pushing passed him so you could leave and move on. start new and heal from this pain. 

“really? you’re just going to walk away?” heeseung asks, still refusing to take accountability for his actions. 

“i’m not walking away… you pushed me away.”

“bye, heeseung.”

jongseong ⋆˚ʚɞ

jay hadn’t been able to pick up a bottle of alcohol since that night… 5 months ago. he hadn’t realized he developed a bad habit of drinking all because he couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that his loving girlfriend, the one who took care of him, who loved him, who fought for him to make things right, was slowly becoming someone he didn’t love anymore. 

so why was it that now that you two were broken up, he wants nothing more to get back together with you? 

he thought about the day you finally came back. after you ran out in the middle of the night jay didn’t see you for a whole week and by the end of that week, you would be gone for good. 

“is this what you really want?” jay had asked you right before you left. 

“its not what i want… but it doesn’t seem like what i want would be something that could ever happen if i stayed with you. 

you hurt me, jay. all i ever did was care for you and love you and it made me realize i hadn’t felt care or love from you for a while now. 

i truly hope that you get help for your drinking problem but i’m sorry i’m not going to be the one to fix it for you.” and with that you were gone. out of jay’s life and although you had said that you weren’t going to be the one to fix his drinking problem, in a lot of ways; you did fix it. 

he hadn’t drank since that night and vowed to himself that he wouldn’t drink ever again and 5 months after, he’s kept that promise. 

jay wished that he did keep his promise to you. 

when he finally asked you to be his girlfriend, he had promised to hold your heart close to his and to never break it. only to find himself distancing his heart from yours and eventually shattering it into millions of pieces when you got into a fight that night. 

but he was now forced to face all of this all over again as you stood in front of him, mirroring the same shocked face he had as the two of you run into each other at a mutual friends party. 

you hadn’t seen jay since that night and although your heart ached for him, you had to choose yourself. you couldn’t stand being with someone who saw you as overbearing when all you did was care for and love them. 

you truly had been worried about jay ever since his drinking habits had gone worse and maybe you could’ve gone about it a better way and not made him feel attacked for his actions but he didn’t have the same consideration for you so why should you do the same… right? 

“h-hi.. yn. you look good.” jay stutters. 

“you do too, um.. i–” you begin to say but he cuts you off. “look, i know we didn’t end on the right foot and these past five months have been hard for me so i could only imagine how hard they’ve been on you. 

i wasn’t right to treat you that way and i’m sorry i’m only realizing it now. i miss you so much and i spend countless nights thinking about you. reminiscing on the good times and how i let myself ruin all of it. 

i’m sorry, yn.” it all comes out like word vomit and quite frankly, you weren’t prepared to hear any of it. you also hadn’t expected him to have this much of grasp on your relationship five months after, but it was all too late. 

“i’m sorry too, jay– but i can’t keep doing this. i think you need to move on. i know i will…” you muttered.

“for what it’s worth… you did help me… i’m five months sober.” he confesses and you give him a tight lipped smile. 

“take care of yourself, ok?” you say before turning around to leave and although jay wished that he could’ve said all of this five months sooner in hopes that it would’ve fixed your relationship, he respects your wishes and just hopes that the next guy who comes around would love you the way you deserved to be loved. 

jaeyun ⋆˚ʚɞ

in the time you’ve dated jake or quite frankly, anyone, they had never raised their voice and spoke to you in that way. jake seemed so angry and upset that it scared you. you knew that jake would never hurt you but his words pierced your heart in ways that caused you pain you had never felt before, especially from someone you love and was supposed to love you.

it always hurts more when it comes from someone you love right? 

you had come home the next day and found jake sleeping on the couch, hugging the plushy that he often said looked like you. 

you’d be lying if you said that seeing him like this didn’t make your heart hurt… but it did. 

it seemed like jake had fallen asleep on the couch waiting for you but you couldn’t shake the feeling.

the feeling of being unwanted, unloved, undesirable, and not enough for someone who is supposed to love you. 

but if jake had loved you he wouldn’t have raised his voice at you.. let alone speak to you in that tone and used language that was meant to hurt someone. 

“yn? is that you?” he says, stretching on the couch and rubbing his eyes, causing you to snap out of it. you quickly wipe away the tears that had miraculously appeared. “um, yeah. i just came to grab some things. you can go back to sleeping..” you explained as you made your way to your shared bedroom. 

“baby? can we talk?” jake says, peering into the room as he sees you packing your things inside of duffel bag. “wait- what are you packing? are you leaving? baby, please don’t do this, can we talk this out?” he was now on his knees in front of you, clutching onto your sweater while he begged. 

“jake, get up.” you say, rolling your eyes at him. 

“its just for a few days, i need time to myself- i need to think, ok?” you said and even now, even when you’re still hurting because of him from the night before, you were here trying to comfort him. 

jake stands up with a sniffle and he attempts to link your hands together but you pull away to continue packing your bag. “when are we going to talk about this? i love you, i don’t want you to leave… please stay.” he continues to beg and although its working, you needed to stay strong. 

“if you loved me you wouldn’t have spoken to me like that. people who love each other don’t speak to people they love that way. 

jake, you hurt me… and i don’t know what i did to deserve that treatment but i just wanted help. i spent all day running errands despite feeling like shit because of my period and you dismissed my feelings like it was nothing. 

that blanket meant so much to me, you knew that it was from my late grandmother yet you tossed it aside for your own accord because you didn’t have the same care for me and the things i love the way i do for you.” you said with a huff as you stuffed the last of your things into the bag. 

“when will you come back?” was all jake asked and all you could muster up was a shrug, because you weren’t entirely sure when you would be back. 

needless to say, a few days turned into a few weeks, and a few weeks turned into a few months and at some point you found yourself not having the need to come back. 

you wished you could get the closure you wanted from jake and you were sure he also wanted that, but walking away was something you needed to do. even if it was just one instance where jake spoke to you that way, it was enough for you to leave because you weren’t going to allow yourself to be with someone who found it in themselves to speak that way to someone they supposedly loved. 

not then, not now, and not ever.

sunghoon ⋆˚ʚɞ

sunghoon hadn’t known what he was doing, it was like his body was moving before his brain could think because he was running back inside and grabbing his car keys to drive after you. 

he wasn’t sure where you were headed off to but he had guessed that you were most likely going to stay with your mom. you were always close with your mom and she often was the person you went to when you were having troubles if you didn’t go to sunghoon. 

sunghoon knew he fucked up and he shouldn’t have treated you that way let alone let some strangers treat you that way. he didn’t know what let him get to the point where he was allowing these men to speak about you, the girl that he loved, in a way that made you feel small. demeaning and degrading you in a way that he hadn’t realized and even if he did, he chose to look away instead of defend you all because he was filled with the greed of wanting this promotion. 

was it even worth it anymore if it meant losing you? 

sunghoon was speeding at this point and although you hadn’t left much before he had went to follow you, there was no one else in the streets as he sped through to catch up to you. 

in a short amount of time, he’s turning into the street that your mom lives on and sure enough, he sees you just about to walk up to the front door. he hapazardly parks the car on the side of the street and stumbles out of his car to get to you. 

“yn, please. wait, lets talk about this!” he says and you’re startled at sunghoon suddenly appearing and you wipe the tears from your face and blink a few times to make sure he was actually there. 

“hoon? what are you doing here?” you ask, stepping down the small stairway that led to your mom’s home. “i couldn’t just let you leave like that, we need to talk-

look i’m sorry for the way i treated you and even more sorry that i let them treat you that way. i love you so much and i couldn’t imagine the amount of hurt i caused you for making it seem like i was okay with letting them say those things about you all because i wanted that promotion so damn bad. 

i was selfish and greedy but those are the things that make me want you more. i don’t want you to leave and walk away from me because i am selfish and greedy and i want you all to myself. 

i’m sorry that i didn’t defend you and i made you feel small…” he says and at this point sunghoon is crying. his voice breaks with every other word and you truly hadn’t seen sunghoon in this much distress, ever. 

you didn’t know how to respond but the longer you looked into sunghoon’s bloodshot eyes, the more confused you became. 

you could tell sunghoon was sincere but you didn’t think this was something that could be fixed right then and there. your sensitivity was always something you struggled with and sunghoon knew that yet he brushed off your feelings like it was nothing. 

“you shouldn’t have driven out all this way… 

because although i appreciate your apology i don’t know that i’m in the right place to accept it or to forgive you. 

sunghoon you hurt me and you let others hurt me. 

i’m selfish too, i want you all to myself too and i wouldn’t have stayed so long if i didn’t love you and want to be with you… but-

i don’t know if i can be with someone that doesn’t see me in the way i deserve. 

and i certainly know i don’t deserve any of that.” both of your attention is drawn to the sound of the front door as it opens, revealing your mother in her nightwear and arms crossed; a displeased expression on her face. 

“i’ll reach out to you when i’m ready.” you say and without another word you’re retreating into your mom’s home, hiding away from sunghoon and preparing yourself to have to face the inevitable one day. 

sunghoon on the other hand, drags himself to his car, head hanging low as he has to come to terms that his own selfishness and greed for the one he loved was also what caused him to lose the love of his life. 

copyright 2025 - present © hoonieyun all rights reserved all writing here is fiction & not in any association with characters mentioned. if you enjoyed reading this please consider reblogging and following <3

[sturkillerbase]

Touch Starved!

Summary: How the JJK men touch you before and after being in a relationship with you - and how they're always dying to do so!

Neutral reader!

Including: Nanami Kento, Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru (separated)

Genre: Fluff (lots of it!)

Wordcount: 5.8k total - 1.8k for Nanami and Gojo. 2k for Geto's

Notes: Very quick mention of periods in Gojo's, but it's so quick you can easily ignore it if you're a person who doesn't get periods. No physical descriptions and no use of Y/N.

Warnings: One brief mention of (little) blood.

A/N: Boy oh boy. This has been sitting in my docs for over a month as I ponder weather it's good enough for posting or not. Reasons being that 1. it's my first JJK fic and 2. I haven't written anything in over 2 years. So I'm really not confident about my rusty writing skills. When I was proofreading it, I thought Nanami's part wasn't good enough, but didn't know how to make it better! Which led to two more weeks of me not wanting to post it. But today I've summoned the courage and BAM! Here it is! Anyways, hope you like it (and let me know if you do, please)! Proofread but let me know if you spot some error.

Nanami Kento

Nanami never touches you. He may be dying for any kind of touch - a slight brushing of hands when you hand him something, your arms pressing against each other during a car drive, accidentally bumping into you as he enters the room you’re exiting – but none of it ever happens. He wouldn’t let it. He’s too respectful to let it happen. Damn, he’ll rush to the car just so he can take the passenger seat before anyone else does. Well, the front seats are more dangerous, of course he’ll take it so anyone else does. And his legs are longer anyway so there's more room for him. These are his actual reasons, right?

Plus, a ten-minute drive would turn into a ten-hour long one in his brain if you were pressed against him. Every tiny bump on the road making you press and rub on each other for a fraction of a second. He’d probably pass out.

The most he’d touch would be with his fingertips, ever so slightly, barely there even. And only on your shoulders or the very top of your back, in case he needed to walk past you in a narrow space, or maybe get your attention silently.

And even with that, he’d be flexing his hand open and then closing it into a tight fist, nervous like a little boy. His face was absolutely neutral, though. Yes, kinda like that one Pride and Prejudice scene.

There was this one time he really messed up. Couldn’t even sleep that night. He was sitting at the table, talking to Shoko, and as he described whatever it was that he was talking about (he couldn’t remember anymore), he stretched out his arm to the side in a gesture, just as you were walking by, and accidentally brushed your thigh, close to your knee. A feather-like, quick brush.

Oh no.

He apologized deeply. Sincerely. Guilt (and shame) in his face, his voice, his whole body. You said it was okay, that it was nothing, no need to worry. All while giving him that damn sweet smile of yours. You sat down as well, joining them, and as he felt heat creep up from his stomach to his neck, he excused himself and stood up quickly, fixing his perfectly-in-place tie, so none of you would see him blushing. What if you were just being nice? What if you thought he was disrespectful? A creep? What if you didn’t like him anymore? Hated him? He was in a cold sweat, laying on his back on his bed, staring at the ceiling, barely blinking.

But oh boy was he touch starved. He craved for the most simple things. Anything would do it at this point. A high five. A gentle poke of your finger on his shoulder. Taking an eyelash off your cheek with his fingertip and having you blow it away for luck.

He’d been thinking of a chance to hug you. Being able to feel your soft form against him as he gets to smell your lovely perfume straight out of you, and not just having the breeze blow it towards him. Honestly that breeze was very disrespectful, forcing him to smell things he couldn’t have.

How far was Christmas? He could hug you then. Or New Years perhaps. There was also your birthday. It’s okay to hug people on their birthdays, he could do that without being weird.

There was this other time that caused him to heat up like a boiler. You fixed his tie after he finished tying it back around his neck, after a particularly intense fight against several curses at once. Technically, you didn’t touch him, you just touched his tie. But he felt your fingers lightly on his chest, just above his dress shirt. That alone was enough to have him shaking.

“There. Better.” You said, looking up at him with a soft smile.

How did you manage to look so cute even after a crazy, tiring fight, clothes covered in dust, a tiny splash of blood across your cheek? He, once again, had to hide his intense blushing, muttering a low “thank you” as he looked away, cheeks red and ears on fire. He cleared his throat, trying to see if he could get his voice to sound anything above a whisper. He was just fine after all that fight, it was you who had taken away all of his strength. Thankfully, there wasn’t much light where you were to make his obvious blush contrast against his pale skin and hair. You didn’t see it.

He started dusting off his clothes, tapping away at himself, more to get his head out of those nervous thoughts than to actually clean himself. You did the same. And then, as he finally recomposed himself enough to turn back to you, your arm reached up. Up, up, up above his jaw, his ear, to the top of his head.

“There’s something here…” you said, nonchalantly, as you brushed out something that had gotten caught in his hair.

God, why were you so touchy today?!

He just watched your movement, thanking you with a little “mm-hm” – there goes his voice again.

There was something on your hair as well. He had noticed earlier. Could he brush it away for you too? Would it be weird if he did? Was doing that being a gentleman? Well, it wouldn’t be gentlemanly of him to let you walk out with something – a tiny thing – on your hair, right?

“There’s, uh-“ He started, nervous “you have something up here, too…” he said, and then reached for it with a touch so light you didn’t even feel it. But he did. And oh my, was your hair soft.

“Thank you.” you said, cheerfully. He gave you a brief nod.

“Yeah. No problem.”

He then quickly grabbed his phone to call Ijichi so he could come pick you two up and get him away from this dangerous scenario he found himself in: you.

When Ijichi finally arrived, Nanami did what he always does, and rushed to the passenger seat. And once you were all seated and buckled up, and Ijichi started driving again, Nanami cursed himself for forgetting to open the car door for you. Where were his manners? His mother taught him better than that.

Later that night, the warmth from your fingers adjusting his tie was still lingering on his chest. He covered his face with a pillow and let out a long, “I’m such an idiot”, loud breath.

Things didn’t change much after you started dating. He had, somehow, managed to gather up the courage to ask you out (this may or may not have involved Gojo telling him he would tell you about Nanami’s crush himself, in front of everyone, very loudly). On your first date, the only touch was your goodbye kiss on his cheek, which had him giggling and kicking his feet in the air the moment you closed the door to your place and he was out of your eyesight. He smiled to himself about it all through the night until he fell asleep, heart beating quickly.

On your third date, you slipped your fingers through his as you two walked around the park, under colorful trees. When you parted ways, his hand was burning, shaking even. He considered not washing it that day.

On the fourth date, he was bold! Reaching across the table to hold your hand. That night, he took another extra step and kissed your cheek back, slipping a gentle pinch to your chin as he wished you a good night, which had you melting.

Took him a few more dates to get comfortable touching you. Now, don’t get him wrong. He wanted to do it desperately, but he didn’t know if he was more afraid of disrespecting you or just touching you at all, like a pre teen boy around his very first crush. Still, he’s a man who takes his time, and respects yours above all else.

After you’re in an established relationship though, Nanami can finally wrap himself around you, just like he’s always dreamed of. And much before Christmas too! He’ll kiss you all over when you least expect it. He’ll lay on your lap, or lay on you, as you’re resting on the couch. You never fell asleep without being in his arms again - except when he cuddles into you and you have him in your arms instead. He’ll hug you from behind and rest his chin on your shoulder as you do something, even as you’re brushing your teeth. And don’t be surprised when he does it while you’re showering too! Walk by him whenever he’s sitting down and be sure he’s going to pull you into his lap, earning a cute little gasp from you. He holds you with so much care and love, like you’re the very reason for his breathing, but at the same time tight enough to make sure you’ll not, somehow, slip away. Like you would ever!

His kisses? Slow, tender, filled with love and affection, eyes full of adoration as he pulls away and looks into your own, gently caressing your cheek. You didn’t know you could ever meet someone with so much love in them. Nanami didn’t know he could feel so much love in him.

He’s the softest. And he’s the softest even in your most private moments, when things get particularly intense. Within the rough gripping and the clashing of teeth, you can still feel the tenderness in his touch, and the extra care in the little love bites he leaves all over your body. He may grab your neck or pull your hair, but always a bit less than you both know you can take. You’ve told him he could let go, but that’s just Nanami. He couldn’t bring himself to do more than that to you. Even if he wanted to give you that extra harsh slap that you ask him for (beg even) as you’re out of breath, his hand just… can’t. 

And you love him exactly as he is.

He’s not one for a lot of public display of affection. He likes to keep his private life private. Also, he’s a bit shy when around others. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t do anything at all. Holding your hand, keeping an arm around your waist, kissing your forehead, taking your arm into his as you walk through a crowded place - he couldn’t bare accidentally getting separated from his dearest.

And don’t forget the little soft pinches on your chin, just like that one time on your fourth date. He normally sneaks those when you’re in a setting where he can’t give you a quick kiss, or, honestly, just for the fun of it, because he loves to watch you absolutely melt, cheeks growing pink and a childish smile spreading on your face. Every time. Every. time.

Sometimes he even thinks that you might be his actual heart, and this thing that is beating inside his chest is just… something else.

And when he looks at you, no matter where or when, he just knows he will never stop being so eager to touch you, however it is. How could he? You’re the love of his life, after all.

Gojo Satoru

Now, we all know Gojo is all over everybody. Always slinging his arms around other people’s shoulders and invading their personal space. Especially if it’s someone he’s fond of. Not that he doesn’t touch people he dislikes and that he knows dislike him back, just to annoy them. It’s his not-so-secret pleasure.

So yeah, he’s always all over you. Giving you attention or pouting as he begs for your attention. It becomes more and more frequent, and he doesn’t hide it. Soon it’s clear for everybody that he's crushing hard on you. The students start teasing him during class and as they cross paths at school, but he just let’s them. It’s the truth, anyway.

But if you think he’s not touch starved even though he’s constantly touching you, you’re wrong. Very wrong. He’s longing, aching for more. And it’s not sexual, no. Not that the thought hasn’t crossed his mind more than once, but it’s not it. He wants to pick you up and bury his nose on your neck. Wants to kiss you every time you do something great, and kiss you every time for no reason other than wanting to as well. Wants to hold you extra close, your body tight against his, face on his chest, as you two fall asleep together. He wants you to run your fingers through his hair as he lays on your lap after a long, exhausting day. Wants to massage your neck and shoulders when you are the one who had a long day. Once you complained about menstrual cramps and said you really wish you had a heat bag around. Well, it took everything on him to not launch himself at you and place his warm hands over your lower belly (yes, he’s an “uterUS” guy). 

When he gets to hug you, as in, when he just hugs you for no reason, he gets your scent all over him and his clothes for the rest of the day, and oh, he loves it. Find him walking around with a dumb(er) smile plastered on his face for the rest of the day. But when night comes and he’s alone at home, he begins to despise it, because you’re not there. And of course he’s gonna make it everyone’s problem by texting the guy group chat he made exclusively for talking about his crush on you. Poor Geto and Nanami (Nanami has left the group chat several times, but Gojo keeps adding him back). He even sends whiny audios. 

He doesn’t want to mess things up with you. So he’s also asked the girls around him for dating advice. Shoko quickly dismissed him with a thick puff of cigarette smoke. Mai just told him “don’t” because she thinks you deserve better. Nobara started by listing all the reasons he was not fit for having a girlfriend, but eventually started talking so much about what a guy should do and how a guy should behave that he had to start taking notes on his cellphone so he wouldn’t forget anything. Of course, when he thanked her, she made him buy her a new jacket as an actual thank you. 

And while he doesn’t come up with a date idea he’s satisfied with, he’ll have to settle with what he has for now.

And as you two get even closer, you start to get touchier too. You start by poking him around every now and then, eyes glowing with mischief when you find his ticklish spots. You lean into him as you two are looking down at the same thing. Hold onto his arm randomly, just because. Until you also start hugging him at any chance you get. And oh boy, is Gojo absolutely delighted. His hopes were more up than ever, and this was a sample of heaven. Actual heaven would be when you two finally get into a relationship. Preferably married. Geto and Nanami keep having to tell him to calm down.

Your first date wasn’t like Gojo planned. In fact, he didn’t even ask you out. But it wasn’t bad at all. 

It happened when you two found yourselves in a strangely romantic setting after fighting some grade one cursed spirits that showed up in the middle of a crowded carnival. Of course, everyone fled the place, and it was deserted, but everything was still working (except for a couple rides and tents that were destroyed during the fight). So, you and Gojo grabbed some (free!) snacks and headed to the ferris wheel, admiring the night sky together.

“This kinda feels like a date, doesn’t it?” He said after a brief moment of comfortable silence, without thinking much, and mentally facepalming at his dumb ass and big mouth. He kept his eyes glued onto the sky after this and stuffed his face with more candy.

“Do you want it to be?” You asked, chill on the outside, shaking on the inside.

Gojo looked at you so fast his neck actually hurt, eyes wide and cheeks full of candy, just like a chipmunk. He swallowed it all down with a big, kinda painful gulp.

“Well, I– I wouldn’t mind…” he answered, his heart beating so fast his chest was hurting. Or was it the candy he swallowed way too soon?

You could see his whole face turning red even under the dim light, and you held back a giggle. Seeing this big guy turn into a very tiny one so quick was adorable.

“Cool. It’s a date, then.” You said with a smile. 

It was no surprise that you two kissed on that very same night, you being as down bad for him as he was for you. Gojo was glad your eyes were shut as you kissed, this way you couldn’t see him frowning and scrunching up his nose as he tried his best not to kiss you desperately. ‘Be normal, Gojo Satoru’, he thought to himself.

Of course, he acted like his super chilled self once you parted, smiling like he wasn’t squealing like a little girl in his head.

Didn’t take long after he became your boyfriend for him to start suggesting you two should move in together. Took even less time for him to start begging for it.

“But baby, I want to cuddle with you every night, and wake up still holding you every day, and have the entire house smelling like you always, especially when you walk out of the shower. I want to sniff all that soap scent out of you. Please! I don’t want to be left with just some pictures of you when I could have real you there.” He said the last sentence with a big pout and huge puppy eyes. You had come to find his eyes could, somehow, get even bigger when he was being whiny like this.

You had also come to find that you couldn’t say no to him.

Damn that lanky man.

Oh, and by “some pictures”, don’t believe him. It was loads of pictures. There were countless pictures of your face everywhere in his house: in the living room, in the kitchen, the bedroom, the study, and even in the bathroom. Yes, he hung one there and refused to take it out. Even when you moved in. So you gave up trying to get it out of there and instead hung a picture of him by yours.

He loved it.

Although finally satisfied with how much he could touch you at any time he wanted, at night he would still wrap himself all around you, entangling his long legs with yours, elated that you were his at last. It was uncomfortable sometimes, having these bumps between you and the mattress, but getting out of his embrace wasn’t a choice. All you could do was wiggle and grunt a little until he moved his limbs into a more comfortable position for you - because he, for one, didn’t mind being uncomfortable as long as he was all around you. Holding you tight was his idea comfortable. And God, if he could become one with you he absolutely would.

Even during summer, he would turn on the AC on the lowest setting just so he could be all over you without you complaining about it being too hot. And if the house got too cold, don’t worry, he’ll heat you up with his whole body, like a personal, portable heater. Or a living blanket.

You were never cold during winter either, because at the smallest of the chills on your body, he would be there. Be it by rubbing your arms and hugging you while you were out or pulling a warm, fuzzy blanket over the two of you when you were home. Hell, he didn’t even think it was that bad when you mischievously put your ice cold feet on his back simply for the fact that that was you touching him. And your punishment for this? Being trapped tightly in his arms while he showers you with quick, loud kisses that makes the skin on your face and neck tickle. Oh, and he will sneak a kiss right on your ear, just to watch you squirm and the goosebumps on your skin, your laugh and his filling the room. 

Worried you'll crush him when you lay on top of him. Well, worry no more, really - he wants you to.

Gojo couldn’t be any happier.

And that group chat? Never forgotten. He would still constantly update the boys on everything you two did together. 

“We fought :C”

“We’re talking again!!!!”

“We went out and had swiss roll cake today ☺️”

Nanami blocked him when he got the “GUYS, IT HAPPENED! WE SPENT THE NIGHT TOGETHER” message. If there was one thing Nanami would not read it would be what Satoru Gojo did in bed with someone.

But be not afraid. Gojo would never, ever expose you like that. No. He’d pluck his eyes out and die before he did anything harmful to you. What he did was ramble on and on about how perfect it was and how happy he was and how it was everything he’d dreamed of and more.

Poor Geto (who has the patience of a saint, really) had to go through it all, reading each new message slowly, with care and fear, also afraid that Gojo could end up spilling too much in his excitement.

All Geto could say after Gojo was done talking was “I’m glad for you, Satoru 😊”, earning several lovestruck stickers from Gojo.

Since he started dating you, it never took too much to make the man happy. Just being with you, seeing you, or even just mentioning you was enough to have him glowing. 

But nothing compared to having you in his arms, safe and sound.

It did take a whole lot to get Nanami to unblock him, though.

Geto Suguru

Dear Geto’s hands are tingling, itching, burning to touch you. When he’s watching you, he unconsciously starts fidgeting with his hands, rubbing his fingers together, digging his nails into his palms, cracking his fingers, shoving them into his pockets so he can grab the fabric of his pants.

Gojo notices how Geto starts doing this more and more often, but he hasn't figured out why yet. Until the day he’s finally going to ask Geto if he’s alright, and if there’s anything going on. When he shifts his gaze from Geto’s hands to his face, he catches him stealing a look at you, not so discreet this time. He was clearly not paying attention to what Gojo was saying just seconds ago.

A smile creeps up on Gojo’s face. He thinks it’s cute, really. Seeing his best friend fall for someone. But what’s much, much better is that now he’s got an amazing reason (or should we say one more) to tease poor old Suguru nonstop.

But what Geto doesn’t realize is that he’s already touching you. All the time. You two are close friends. Have been for good a while. And he’s always respected you, obviously. You are comfortable around each other. So it kind of makes sense that he doesn’t notice when he starts doing so.

He’ll sometimes whine about being tired as the two of you are sitting down on the couch, and lay his head on your shoulder. He also does that when you show him something on your phone. If you two are standing, he’ll rest his cheek on your head.

Other times, he’ll just hook his pinkie around yours as you walk side by side. When you’re in a crowded place though, he’ll either walk behind you with his hands on your shoulder, especially if he's guiding you somewhere or you're guiding him, or sneak his arm around your waist. Depends if he’s feeling more playful or moody that day.

Oh, and speaking about waist, that’s his absolute favorite spot to hold you. He’s standing or leaning somewhere and you come by? He’ll immediately reach out for your waist and pull you close, having you rest your body against his. He’s sitting down and you’re standing? There comes that arm firmly pulling you to him, thumb gently rubbing your side.

The latter had you start to (also subconsciously) do something similar: if you’re sitting and he stops by your side, you’ll give his pants a gentle tug to get him to stand closer so you can rest your head on his hip. And no one is surprised when, after a while, Geto’s hand goes from resting on your shoulder to caressing your head.

Oh, don’t forget the amazing bear hugs he’ll give you all of a sudden, making you gasp in surprise and then start to giggle as you hug him back, wonderfully nestled into him.

He doesn’t even have to look before reaching for you anymore. He’s memorized all the bits of you at this point. He would think it’s ridiculous, hadn’t he been so oblivious to his own actions.

And you enjoy it all, leaning into him and basking in the warmth and peace that radiate from him. Because you like him just as much as he likes you. You just don’t know it yet.

Gojo noticed this not too long after noticing Geto’s feelings for you. He actually realizes you like Geto much before you do.  And he’s perplexed by it all. How can the two of you be so oblivious about it?! He’s so perplexed he doesn’t even tease as much as he normally would, too invested into watching the two of you being absolutely clueless around each other. Eventually he starts talking about it with Shoko, and they obviously make a bet on who’s going to confess first.

Geto also finds himself growing jealous and rather possessive of you (in a normal way, not in a toxic, creepy way). If looks could kill, so many people would’ve spontaneously combusted by now, just from the glare he sends anyone that stands too close or gets too funny around you. Especially that one friend of yours who’s way too comfortable with you. He’ll watch from a distance until his patience is entirely over, and then immediately make his way to you, arm glued to your waist before he’s even stopped walking, a fake ass smile on his face as he says something like “what are you two talking about?” or “what’s up, honeycomb?”. Or, to that friend he’s seen more times than he’d like, “I’m sorry, have we met before?”. He’ll even add an “Are you sure? I think I would remember you if we did” when he’s feeling extra spicy.

And still Geto Suguru’s hands are aching for you, for how touch starved he is. And he’s still fidgeting with them the moment he lays eyes on you.

Then, after far too many weeks of suffering - and finally telling his bestie about his crush - he’ll whine to Gojo about being so desperate for anything from you. About how glad he would be if he could at least hold your hand or have just one little touch from you. And he’s still mid mental breakdown speech when Gojo interrupts him with a 

“Bro, are you serious right now?”

And when he doesn’t understand Gojo’s question, the white-haired man has to tell him all that he's been watching for the past few months.

“You two just haven’t fucked at this point. Or have. But I really don’t wanna know.” Gojo shudders at the thought. “What I’m saying is, we all thought it was cute and funny in the beginning, but now it’s becoming almost painful to watch. Shoko and I are nearly giving up our bet. Nanami’s considering moving to the countryside sooner.”

And the ridiculous look that Geto has on his face, speechless, mouth dropped to a perfect shocked “O” after hearing it all, is priceless. Gojo is dying to pull out his phone and take a picture of him, but he’s not in the mood to get beat up at the moment (he got his hair cut today, ok?).

But Shoko, being the icon she is and having just entered the room after hearing her name, captures the moment perfectly, making the picture their groupchat’s icon right away.

Geto’s mostly silent for the rest of the day, processing the information. It was all so simple, so natural to be that close to you that he didn’t realize he was already all over you. He’s stunned. At himself, mostly, more than the situation as a whole. How did he not notice? Geto Suguru, who’s always so aware of himself, his every thought and every move (no wonder everyone thinks he’s so gracious, even when he’s sitting with his legs spread open).

He starts getting anxious that night soon after going to bed. What if he had gone too far? Invaded your personal space? What if you were secretly hating it, disgusted and uncomfortable, but couldn’t find a way out of this situation. He knows you can defend yourself damn well, but if that had messed you up mentally, things aren’t as easy and simple as kicking him in the balls.

But then you would’ve made something at this point, right? Avoid him and distance yourself. Plus, you’re close friends with Gojo as well, you would’ve said something or asked him for help if that was the case.

Also, Gojo may be stupid, but he’s not that stupid. And he’s got good eyes. He knows you well. If he says you like him too, the chances of that not being true are very low.

That calms him down… A little.

He decides that he’s got to think of something. Do something. If not ask you out, at least talk to you. Make things clear. And apologize if he has to. 

And then he, once again, unconsciously slips into daydreaming about a scenario where luck is on his side, and instead of laying down on his own to go to sleep as he is right now, he’ll be able to fall asleep with his arms practically tied around you, his nose shoved against your head so he can intoxicate himself with that delicious smell of your shampoo. He thinks falling asleep due to low oxygen because of doing so is a great way to fall asleep.

As you become significant others, he’s still doing all that he used to do (and much more, of course), but in a deeper way.

He’ll lay his head on your shoulder and loop his arm around yours. He’ll fully hold your hand, interlocking your fingers. His hand is firm against your hip, holding you close to him. When he pulls you close as you’re standing and he’s sitting, he’ll loop his arms around your leg and hold your thigh, or both your thighs, as he rests his head on your side. Or he might pull you to his lap, nonchalantly. Who knows? 

Those bear hugs? Expect loads of them. Surprise or not. And now he’s also picking you up and showering you with kisses. He falls in love even harder when you get all giddy when he spins you around.

And his favorite, the arm around your waist as you two stand there. Now both his arms are around you, tighter than ever, obviously possessive even though he (again) doesn’t realize how possessive he looks when he does that. Especially when he’s leaning against something and his leg is slipping between yours, your hips tight against him, and he’s resting his chin on you (he doesn’t know why, but this one is heaven to him).

He’s so about touching you and feeling you, that when you’re in bed together, he doesn’t see the point of using something else to tie you up when he can just hold you in a position himself. He’ll use his own body and weight to keep you down, or, if he can’t hold you as he’d like (he only has two hands, unfortunately) he’ll command that you hold yourself in place so can use his hands to hold wherever else he’s got his mind on. You obey, obviously, mischievous or desperate, depending on how fucked up you already are at that point.

Aftercare? Showering you (he’ll clean you up in bed if your legs are too wobbly) and massaging your whole body, of course. He’ll kiss your body, following his hands, as he goes on, whispering sweet nothings. Then, he’ll pull you against his chest, wrapping both arms around you, so you can fall asleep listening to the always-calm, steady thud of his heartbeat. You’re both still naked, skin on skin, to be able to be as close to each other as humanly possible. He’s the happiest man on Earth.

He’s not shy of kissing you in public, either. From a peck to an open mouthed kiss, he’ll do it all. You’re the one growing red all over, actually. Having to push against his chest so he’ll pull away, especially when he’s going at it for too long.

“Oh, let them watch.” he murmurs as you point that everyone’s looking, your eyes darting everywhere in embarrassment “They’re either happy for us or straight up jealous” He says with those beautiful eyes of his staring so deeply into yours that you swear he can see your soul. “I’ve got the prettiest little thing there is anyway. All mine.” He holds your chin and kisses you one last time. He’s a teaser, but he respects it every time you ask him to stop.

Another thing he’s come to love is having you brush his hair, whether it’s in the morning or after naptime. Or at some random moment, just because he wants to feel you gently brushing it. And his favorite is after washing his hair. He’ll grab his hair products and comb and rush to you, closing his eyes as you gently untangle his hair and the delicate, flowery smell of the products fill the room. You always end it with an “all done, baby!” and a kiss to his forehead, and he thanks you looking up at you with loving eyes, following with a kiss on your lips. He wouldn’t trade moments like this for nothing in the world.

He loves you. And he loves loving you. And he adores holding you however it is.And even after all this time, his hands still itch, still tingle, still burn, and still get all fidgety every time he looks across the room and his eyes find you.

P.S.: Might write a part 2 of this for more characters once I get more comfortable with writing them, like Ino, Choso and Higuruma!

Divider by @uzmacchiato

[siasthoughts]

First, I adore your work, been reading it all afternoon! If you've got time I'd like to request room 3 with me and Gris in a friends to lovers situation? I was thinking something with it being painfully obvious to everyone that Gris is flirting but reader (fem, btw) is oblivious to it until he dumbs it down for her? (I'm not ashamed to admit that I am both deaf and blind when it comes to signals lmfao) TY <3

꩜ .ᐟ 𝖔𝖓𝖊 𝖜𝖆𝖞 𝖌𝖑𝖆𝖘𝖘 𖤐

── .✦ 𝐆𝐑𝐈𝐒 𝐱 𝐂𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐑!𝐅!𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑

𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐏𝐓: to your awfully oblivious self, you keep missing the shots that gris attempts to shoot, until one fateful day where after training with him, hq arranges a meeting (which was actually important) in which you both get teased at at the end, leaving gris to finally confess directly.

𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒: awfully long 😭 . lowkey slowburn for a oneshot . oblivious reader . cunnilingus (i know he a munch) . gentle sex . constant checks . intimate sex 🤤 . very implied aftercare . MISSIONARY

𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒: HII OP i’m so sorry for taking so long omg i made literally like 3 drafts for this, because i didn’t know how to set the plot up, and i just went with the one i liked the most. i also haven’t written in a while and i’m lowkey out of my element. BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYYYY!!!! (gris' voice in the anime actually has me in a fucking chokehold)

wc: 4.7k (i had too much fun towards the end sori...)

you've been working as a cleaner, in hopes to do something with your life. that's what is promised to cleaners anyway.

everyone's so nice! especially this one guy, gris, gris rubion. tall, blonde, extremely kind-hearted to everyone.

he's so kind that the way he holds your hand when he helps you train with your vital instrument is so soft… the way he speaks so gently to you… is all so… friendly and kind!

you panted, hands planted firmly on your knees as sweat dropped onto the concrete, and your vital instrument tightly clenched within one fist.

"are you okay?" gris asked, walking over to you, barely even out of breath as he placed a hand on your shoulder.

"no, yeah, yeah, i'm fine." you rasped out, standing up straight as you wiped some sweat off your forehead.

you asked the boss—corvus—if there was anyone on the team that was free who could help train with you, and coincidentally, gris was.

and now, for the past hour and a half, you've been fighting him, with all your strength, but his dodges and counter attacks have been nothing but just short of flawless.

"how about let's rest for a while and get a snack inside?" he smiles softly, his voice caring. damn, was he even trying?

"that sounds… good." you chuckle breathlessly, still trying to catch your breath.

he pats your shoulder, "okay then, let's head inside." his fingers slide off as he turns to head back inside headquarters.

you follow, your instrument quickly fading away into specks of dust as you step back into the comfort of the main building, with semiu greeting you with a quiet nod as she flipped through her… usual magazines.

"is there anything specific you want?" gris asks as you both walk along the peaceful halls, making your way towards the food hall.

"well… i've been craving some sweets and some steamed potatoes…" you respond, your voice sounding like a pondering thought.

he chuckles at your response. "okay, candies and steamed potatoes it is then. though that is kind of an odd combination." he jokes along as you both get to the food hall.

"well, what isn't odd in this place?" you clap back wittily, with a sense of arrogance in your reply.

"mm, well, you're right. anyway, just take a seat, i'll get the food." he hums reassuringly, patting your shoulders once more before turning to part from your path.

you walk towards a nearby table, leaning forward as you rested your arms on the creaky wood. "are we gonna go back to training after this?" you ask, turning your head towards him as he arranges two plates.

"do you want to?" he returns the question as he carries the plates over.

you groan with exhaustion, letting your head fall low onto the table with a soft thud, "not really…"

he laughs teasingly, "okay then… we can… do something else if you like." he shrugs as he sits in front of you.

you look up and slowly fix your posture, pulling your plate towards yourself. your eyes widen as your remember a thought, "oh right, isn't there gonna be team meeting later?"

"oh right, i forgot about that." he huffs, "it's in a few minutes, we should get there early, let's hurry up."

you nod, taking bites of the potatoes.

after you both finish, gris puts the used plates into the designated 'dirty dishes area,' you navigate the halls once more.

"you're adjusting to this place pretty well, aren't you?" he praises, turning his head towards you.

"yeah, well, i think i get along with people pretty well." you confidently spoke, nodding flamboyantly.

"well, you are very skilled, and not to mention, very… beautiful." the last word comes out a bit quieter, "you are basically the deal package." he summarizes with a soft smile and a complementary laugh.

you chuckle obliviously, "yeah, i know." you shoot back cockily.

when walking through the corridor that'd lead to the meeting room, other members catch up behind you.

you can hear teasing giggles and whispers sound from them, gris looks back and unknowingly places a hand on your hip.

"someone's going to pass." he murmurs calmly and instinctively, pulling you closer to him as you suddenly feel a presence rush by you.

you recognize the figure from his small stature and monotone white hair, with black streaked ends, "sorry!" the figure yells as the voice quickly fades out into the distance.

"rudo's always just doing something, huh?" you sigh, not noticing his hand lingering on you for a second too long. 

"yeah… boss told him to come earlier than others since they had something new about his instrument, but i guess he ends up arriving at the same time as the others anyway." gris responds and finally letting his hand fall away.

finally you both arrive at the meeting hall, with most of the members already there. you earn a few glances before people fall back into their conversations.

"let's sit here." he suggests, his fingers gently pushing against your back to guide you towards a pair of chairs.

the sight turns heads, but before their mouths could run a few teasing remarks and whispers, corvus enters the room with rudo.

rudo's face held an expression of disappointment, but under that was his second nature of confident determination.

"okay, we just found out something new about rudo's vital instrument—" corvus starts.

but honestly, you never really listened to these meetings… not because you hated them, or the people, no, nothing like that.

you just seemed to prefer learning more about things when you come face-to-face with it directly or by experience.

your thoughts were cut short, "are you bored?" a voice—gris—whispers into your ear, his words isolated from all the chatter around you.

"kinda, yeah…" you respond with a tone of disappointment, and a strained yawn.

"wanna head out for a bit? i get the gist of the mission anyway." he suggests, pulling back just a bit.

"no… i feel bad for just leaving mid-meeting." you let out a quiet, nervous laugh as you scratch the back of your head.

"okay, that's understandable." he huffs, pulling away. but as he does so, an arm slithers around your shoulders, his fingers rubbing against their edges.

kindly, you lean into his embrace, shifting closer to him as you tried to listen into the important conversations.

tomme, just off to your side with follo, cocks her head towards you both. her elbows nudge against follo, and her voice coming out in a relaxed, unsuspecting tone.

"hey, look." she starts, "how does she not see all his efforts?" she mutters to follo, her words mixed with both concern and light-hearted tease.

"she must be blind," follo adds with a strained chuckle, "i feel bad for gris, he keeps shooting such good shots but the hoop keeps moving."

tomme couldn't help but snicker at the comment, but their words go ignored and buried under heavier and louder voices of the members.

"what about the rookie? we could use this chance to see how much she's improved." semiu offers an idea, her eyes locked onto you.

your body jolts awake at her suggestion, you instinctively clear your throat, "y-yes? what's my job?" 

semiu shuts her eyes for a moment with a sigh, and corvus next to her with a calm smile that's almost laughing, in much contrast with the conversation at hand.

"you'll be playing defense for rudo's team, support their moves and try to diverge incoming attacks." she repeats, her tone exasperated and lazy.

"oh, okay…" you respond excitedly, nodding.

"that's the spirit," gris tenderly smiles at you as his thumb continues to gently circle the blades of your shoulder, "people like you get far, you know." 

"i'm just doing my job." your lips curl into a childish grin.

"yeah, i know," he shrugs, "but you do it in a way that infects others, you know?", he cautiously speaks, picking his words with care.

"when i'm around you… my sense of purpose becomes even stronger, in a way." he vaguely explains as his fingers slide over to the ends of your hair, fiddling with the strands carefully.

you stay silent for a few moments, not knowing how to perceive or reply to his words.

"that's… cool," the response comes out bland, "i- uhm… didn't know i have that effect on people." you continue with that same, indifferent smile.

your mind sets this off as an another compliment, a little odd, but still just a compliment nonetheless. well, at least that's what your brain says.

"—okay, everyone, meeting over. now we can focus on what's happening over there in the back." corvus announces placidly with finality as he crosses his arms, his lips painted into that same nonchalant smile.

your neck snaps towards corvus, and everyone's eyes now focused on you, and well, gris.

gris coughs, and pulled his arm away, not with haste but more so embarrassed acceptance.

after all, he—and everyone—knows that it's practically just you who doesn't see it at this point.

"huh? what- what do you mean?" you raise a brow, completely unaware of their implications.

the room stays painfully silent for the next few moments, with eyes only blinking at you. the silence breaks as an innocent, unmindful voice breaks the silence.

"amo can see that gris likes you!" she exclaims, her fingers clasped together as her eyes dart between the both of you.

"what?" your stomach flips at the words as your head turns back to gris, with his palms rubbing against his knees.

"let's uh- let's go outside?" he suggests, his face slightly flushed as he takes a deep breath.

"wait, is what they're saying true?" you raise a brow, your tone sounding accusing.

"let's talk about it outside…" he pushes the suggestion, standing to his feet and reaching out a hand for you.

"okay…" you reply suspiciously as you take his hand and followed him out with the room slowly growing louder with chuckles, whispers and laughs.

gris shuts the door behind him and faced you, your face confused and curious. 

"they're joking aren't they?" you laughed out before he could start, "and plus, amo's probably misinterpreting things." you shrug.

"don't worry, this won't change anything between us!" you continue, patting his shoulder.

his fingers firmly wrap around your wrist, it wasn't harsh, it was instead just a small, silent request to let him speak.

your eyes widen for a moment before your lips fall shut, nodding to let him talk.

"they're just… stating the obvious." gris starts, "and… they're right."

his words practically just squeezed your heart.

"i've been trying to show you… but i don't know… none of the stuff i do seem to work." he rubs the back of his neck as his eyes trace the cracks on the ground.

"i… like you."

the three words snap everything into place in your head, all those glances, those compliments, those offers.

"wait… seriously?"

"yes, seriously."

your body freezes, so you weren't alone in this feeling?

the feeling of your stomach just twisting itself whenever you're near him, whenever your eyes meet by chance, and that ache in your bones of just wanting— or maybe needing to be near him.

the rare comfort he brings to all this chaos of a world, it naturally just brings anyone in, and you find yourself to be so drawn to his peace.

but he, he's drawn to your chaos, your spontaneous soul, the positive life you bring among all the sorrow.

"now, i don't expect you to return the feelings nor will i force you—"

"what do you mean?" you interrupt, "i feel the same way!" you smile at him, eyes beaming with excitement.

"wait, are you being serious?"he asks, as he couldn't help the giddy smile creeping onto his face.

"yes!" you exclaim, rushing to have your arms wrapped around him.

some nosy ears suddenly falls through the door with a loud slam, august.

with the door now blown wide open, everyone stands crumpled up awkwardly, standing at the door.

august scrambles to stand up, dusting off his clothes hurriedly. "hey~!" he opens his arms for the both of you, "we toootally weren't listening!" he says with over exaggerated enthusiasm.

with one arm over gris, and one over you, august congratulates you both, "well, we're all really, reaaally happy for both of you!"

he lowers his voice, "not like we all just saw it coming…"

"anyway, great job, gris! for finally catching the flopping fish!" august laughs, patting gris' shoulders.

after all the awkward greetings and praises, everyone's finally retreated to their own rooms and spaces, and you, went with gris to his room.

he sighs as he shuts and locks the door. you've been to each other's room quite a number of times already, so this really isn't anything new.

you slump yourself down onto his bed, your weight sinking into the familiar mattress.

he slowly, cautiously walks over to you. "so… when did your… feelings start?" he asks, sitting next to you.

"well i'm not even really sure, i just one day realized how different i felt around you." you said with that calmness that was in-character.

he nods with thought, "well… i don't know how you haven't been noticing all my attempts, when everyone else has." he laughs almost dejectedly.

"sorry," you apologize with a nervous smile, "i just don't really like assuming things… and i'll be honest- i really don't understand these things until they're shoved in my face." you turn to him.

he chuckles, shrugging, "well, that i can tell, and learned about the hard way."

you laugh along at his comment, "well… so what do you want to do about it now?" you ask, your eyes burning into his.

his gaze challenges yours as his chest heaves with a quiet breath, his fingers silently inching towards yours.

silence flares between you both as you keep your eyes locked on each other. the skin of his fingertip finally touches yours, and a warmth bursts from that point.

"…can i?"

he asks softly, quietly, just barely audible, filled with barely restrained urges.

"of course."

you respond with a teasing smile, the same smile that had him head over heels in the first place. 

he sucks in a staggered breath through his teeth before his body finally leans towards you, one hand reaching for the back of your neck.

he starts with a simple, plain kiss, an innocent hug between both your lips.

a few more pecks as he commits the taste of your lips into his mind, then his greed starts to seep through.

his kisses start to become more conquering, his weight beginning to softly push you down against the bed.

he pulls away for a moment, slightly out of breath, "is this okay? is it too much?" he asks, his eyes seeking for some sort of reassurance in yours.

"no, it's okay, it's okay." you reassure him delicately as you wrap your own arms around his neck.

he smiles, content with your response as his other free hand cradles the hill of your hip, his lips back on yours.

"can i take these off?" he huffs as he looks down, his fingers hooked onto the belt of your pants, asking for permission before raising his head to look back up at you.

you nod in agreement, your hands finding their own comfort in his light blonde locks, fiddling with the strands.

sounds of clothes rustling and belts unbuckling echoed across the walls as he helped you out of your clothes, leaving you in your underwear.

"you're… truly so… perfect." he mutters the praise as he traces his fingers along the lines of your body, splaying out across the planes and feeling your warmth.

he straightens himself above you, pulling back as his hands slip off of you momentarily, only to move to the zipper of his clothes.

he feels your attention locked onto him, so he slows is movements a bit, each shift of his fingers deliberate.

your neck bobs as you swallow your anticipation, watching as he slowly undressed.

first, sliding his jacket off his arms, and then, pulling his shirt over his head. you marvel at his body, but not surprised. after all, where would all that strength come from?

next, his belt. his hands sliding across the leather with practiced skill, so obviously teasing you.

your jaw tenses, growing impatient before deciding to reach out for it yourself, making gris jerk back a bit.

your own hands deftly undo the belt, ripping it from the loops, and throwing it onto the floor with a soft clang. 

"you were taking too long." you complained as your hands went over to the zipper of his pants.

he chuckles at your brashness, "you're so straightforward," he comments, "i like that."

you roll your eyes playfully as you pull his pants away, leaving him only in his boxers.

you can see the hard imprint already under the fabric, pleading to be let out.

"i've been waiting so long." he mutters, slowly leaning down, taking his sweet time and savoring each second.

he settles himself in between your legs, his eyes locked onto yours before flicking down to the damp heat of your arousal.

he hooks your legs just over his shoulders as his fingers trail the wet trail along your panties, "is all this because of me?" he asks, a hint of cockiness in his tone.

"isn't it obvious?" you reply, rolling your eyes with a teasing grin.

your fingers tangle themselves within his hair, playing with it as you ready yourself for whatever he was about to do.

he shrugs at your reply, a giddy smile painting his face as he hooks his finger into your underwear, sliding it down your legs, inch by painful inch.

you feel your breath grow heavier, your patience growing thin as you stare down at him.

"well aren't you taking your sweet time?" you hiss lowly through gritted teeth.

"it's a taste of your own medicine." he retorts as he finally pulls your underwear off your legs.

you couldn't find it in yourself to snap a quick comeback, because, well he was right. you had him wait for a while, even though it was so obvious what he was after.

"you understand don't you?" he adds with a teasing lilt in his voice, "so just let me take my time with you."

his thumb runs across your aching clit, the touch sending shivers across your nerves, and a breathy sigh escapes your lips.

his eyes flicker up to you, that same, cocky grin plastered on his face, practically saying 'you-liked-that-didn't-you?'

your body's reaction to his mere touch makes you think of what heights of euphoria you could feel when he actually…

that's for later.

he leans closer, his tongue slipping out of his lips to drag across your slit. you groan, locking his head loosely in between your legs.

a low snicker reverberates from his throat and across your sensitive muscle, causing your grip on his hair to tighten.

"gris…" you breathe out.

he takes this as a go signal, his mouth diving into your cunt, but not rushing. he gently sucks the nub, then turning his head down just a bit, just enough for his nose to rub against it.

his tongue then repeatedly teases your entrance, circling around the hole, and followed with gentle laps.

you instinctively feel your back twitch and arch off of the mattress, and his hands now find themselves resting on your hips.

only for his fingers to travel upwards, slowly dragging across the planes of your torso and leaving trails of flames in their wake.

your body squirms under his touches, and uncontrollable gasps and quiet moans sound from your mouth.

"gris… i'm- i'm getting close…" you rasp out breathlessly, your hips beginning to move on their own against his eager mouth.

he reaches for your chest, squeezing softly as he doubled his efforts, the tip of his tongue pushing through your entrance and curling itself to feel around your walls.

you suck in a breath, feeling his tongue thrust just barely past your entrance with tender care, and his teeth sucking the surrounding flesh.

it's all so sweet, addicting.

"i-i'm cumming…" you huff out, locking him tighter between your thighs, but this only encourages him.

his tongue delves in just slightly deeper, but the difference is… insanity.

he sucks with rhythm, that familiar feeling tightening within your stomach, threatening to snap as your free hand clutches at the sheets.

his fingers continue to fondle your chest, his thumb and index pinching delicately at the peak, adding to the euphoria building in your gut.

"ah-! i'm cumming, i'm cumming!" you chant quietly, in a whisper as you keep him in place, your body shivering as the evidence of your pleasure shoots into his mouth.

and without hesitation, he draws it all in, gulping it in with each suck like a starved man, and just offered the sweetest nectar.

as you slowly came down from your high, your legs loosen, letting him go as he pulls himself away.

he licks at his lips, not letting a drop go to waste, "you taste even sweeter than i thought." he praises as he straightens himself, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"are you finally going to…" you trail off, watching as his his fingers poke into the waistband of his underwear.

"do you want me to?" he tilts his head, pushing the waistband down just enough for you to see that god given v-line.

you feel yourself internally salivate as your eyes shamelessly rake over him, "c'mon, you already know the answer." you huff, rolling your eyes as you prop yourself on your elbows.

he smiles at your response before removing the last layer of fabric on his body with a teasingly slow pace.

he feels your gaze burn through his skin as his cock finally peeks out of the fabric, the tip a flush shade of pink.

as he fully pulls the cloth off, his arousal twitches as a low groan rumbles from his chest. "finally…" he mutters to himself.

"how do you wanna do it?" he asks.

"anything would be fine…"

"okay then, let's do it like this…" he lifts your legs, "i want to be able to see you." he pushes your knees towards your chest, "do you mind if we do it like this?"

you nod, approving of it as he takes a deep breath, using one hand to line himself up against you. "i'll be gentle, okay?" he reassures.

"i mean i don't mind if you aren't."

his brows twitch up as his eyes flick over your face, to assess if you're making some joke. "well it's our… first, together," he speaks softly, "i want to be making love."

then slowly, he pushes his tip past your entrance, causing a small mewl to slip from your mouth.

"tell me whenever you need a break, or if we need to slow down, okay?" he asks, momentarily pausing his movements.

you nod, and he continues to slowly, carefully push into you. you throw your head back against the mattress as you feel him filling you up, inch by inch.

he leans down to wrap you in his arms, with his lips latched loosely on the skin of your shoulder. you feel his warm breath ripple across your skin as he lets out a low groan, his own pleasure sparking through his nerves.

he pants, "i'll start moving now, okay?" he alerts you, his voice still as tender and caring.

your own arms slither around his body to brace yourself, "okay…"

he takes a breath first before his hips gently pull back and push back inside, with this pace, you could feel each centimeter, his cock stretching your walls so lovingly.

"gris… it- it feels so…" you gasp as you feel his tip politely push against the spot that makes you see stars, "mmph- so… so good."

he holds you close, his arms tucked under you, and his hips not faltering as he presses gentle kisses on the side of your neck, just under your jaw.

his dick digs into you, affectionately, funnily enough. almost like he's afraid to break you—he is afraid.

his teeth nips at the tender skin of your neck as his fingers cradle your nape, "you feel so good, too." he murmurs, his brows creasing into a frown as his composure thinned.

"so… so good," he adds, more of a growl now,

"too good."

he pulls back, letting you go as he carefully pulls his arms out from under you. he takes a good look, observing the way your hair sticks to your forehead from damp sweat, your flushed skin, that desperate—oh so desperate—look in your eyes.

"i'll… i'll go a bit faster, okay?" he looks into your eyes for some sort of approval.

and you nod, swallowing a breath as you stare up at him in all his glory, committing each crease of his muscle into memory.

he smiles at your approval, his hips picking up the pace, but not too fast, just enough. his hands trail up from your hips, then your thighs, then calves to throw your legs over his shoulders once more.

he holds onto your ankle, then cocking his head to the side to place a kiss onto it. "tell me when you're close." he notes before going back to focus on the task at hand.

his cock continues to piston into you, gently, but deep. deep enough to hit that sweet spot. you watch the way his body moves, it's genuinely hypnotic.

the way his torso stretches along with his hips rocking into you, fucking delicious.

he holds onto your hips, elevating that sensation as he pulls you back against him with each thrust, making you let out a whine that was a little louder than you expected.

"shh, shh…" he hushes, "we wouldn't want them to hear us, we've already embarrassed ourselves earlier." he reminds.

he's right.

your hand moves up to your mouth, covering tightly as you bit back all the noises threatening to spill from all this pleasure.

you loosen your grip on your mouth to speak, "gris… i'm close…" you whimper weakly as you look up at him.

that look.

it's going to drive him off the edge too.

"me too," he huffs out, his brows furrowing as a bead of sweat rolled down his cheek, "let's finish together, okay?" he whispers softly, maintaining the eye contact.

you nod, feeling heat pool within your stomach once more, and that familiar sensation of indescribable need for release begins to build in your nerves as his cock drives into you.

"i'm- i'm gonna cum," he rasps out weakly, as his pace quickens with strained control, "let's cum together."

"mmgh…" you moan into your hands as you feel euphoria spill into your veins, your legs shaking.

as gris feels you climax, he immediately pulls out to release onto your stomach with a low groan that rumbled from his chest.

his mouth parts slightly as he pants, seeing his essence marking your lower abdomen, the sight fulfills some unfamiliar urges within him.

your hands fall away from your mouth, and your chest heaves as you catch your breath.

"that felt…" you smiled giddily, "so fucking good." you crudely spoke.

he chuckles at your remark as he leans down to kiss you, "i'll clean you up, just lay and rest." he spoke with finality as his thumb rubs against your cheekbone briefly.

he reaches for the tissue box on his bedside table, pulling some out to first wipe the sweat off your face.

"that was… unforgettable in a really, really good way by the way." he states with a laugh.

the rest is history, but one thing's clear. he never, ever forgot how light his hands should, are, and would be around you.

despite the strength within them, his fingers always held and touched you with delicate caution.

his heart was in your hands, and he trusts that you'd hold it with the same care.