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changingplumbob · 2 years ago

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York Household: Chapter 7, Part 3

Deanna tries to help Reece with his boy problems, Paris is always welcome to the York's food, and Aaron is not a very helpful lawyer. Also I do read mod notes but I may gave neglected to go back and read old notes when getting new mods. Sorry high school sims.

Deanna invites Reece to the park with her and Kelly. Reece is still in a bad mood so she suggests they try swing their worries away. The two have fun embracing their youth, forgetting about romantic endeavours for a spell. The sun here is amazing! Makes getting pictures so much easier.

Kelly wants to declare someone an enemy, but doesn't have any sims he dislikes yet. He scans the park and finds a random sim who he thinks he can get under the skin of. Slowly he begins a campaign of rudeness and mean interactions. Unfortunately the sim leaves before Kelly can declare him an enemy.

Deanna: If you want to talk to him, then just text him

Reece: He's the one that ran, he should text first

Deanna: Forget should, do you want to talk to him

Reece: Yes but-

Deanna: No buts, text him

Reece: He's older, he should be sweeping me off my feet not the other way around

Deanna: Ridiculous

Reece: What do you mean

Deanna: That's just like saying the guy has to win the girl. We're not straight, we can't afford to get sucked in those kinds of stupid stereotypes

Reece: Okay but who's the man in your relationship

Deanna: OMW shut up idiot

Reece: Kidding, kidding, but I'd gladly be his girl, his guy...

Reece: Be his anything really if things went back to how they were

Deanna: You don't want them to go back

Reece: I don't?

Deanna: You want them to change for the better

Reece: Fine, what am I saying in this text then

Deanna: You could start with a greeting

Reece: Yeah but, hi, hey, hello, yo, sup...

Deanna: Just pick one

Reece: Right, now what? I should probably apologise right

Deanna: What?

Reece: For kissing him

Deanna: Are you sorry for that

Reece: I'm sorry for things being weird but it was pretty wonderful

Deanna: Then don't apologise. Be brave and throw in an "I miss you"

Reece: Okay I got "Hey Samir, blondie here. Missing seeing you. Let's catch up at school"

Deanna: Blondie?

Reece: *blushes* it's just what he calls me

Deanna: Cute!

Reece: Shut up

Denna: Now press send, dare you

Reece: Fine

*text swooshes off*

Reece: Oh ship what did I do, can I unsend

Deanna: No

Reece: I might have a heart attack

Deanna: You won't, just use your yoga breathing tricks

Reece: *deep breaths* So what now

Deanna: Ball is in his court, now we practice patience

Reece: Really

Deanna: You want to be a zen guru right? Got to start somewhere

Reece: Thanks for helping De

Deanna: Any time

The pair decide to have a game of chess since they're in a park after all. Deanna may have a tech focused brain but Reece is a genius. In a tight spot she distracts him and switches some pieces. Lucky for her Reece doesn't seem to notice, or is too polite to say anything. He still wins the game.

Kelly: I want to go home

Deanna: Ma and Pa are probably still on their date, come and enjoy the clouds

Kelly: Be boring? No. I'm going to have some fun with this stuff I found

Reece: Should we be stopping him

Deanna: It'll all wash away in the rain, and he really doesn't listen to me anyway

Kelly: I don't feel so good

Deanna: Oh duck, you look terrible

Kelly: I'm telling ma you swore

Deanna: Of course you are, come on then, later Reece

Kelly: Later Reece

Reece: Feel better soon, and don't get De sick

Kelly: Where's the fun in being sick if I can't infect others

Deanna: Come on evil one

Deanna: Oh good ma, you're home

Calista: What did he do now

Deanna: He got sick

Kelly: *itches*

Calista: Don't scratch, you'll just hurt yourself, water and a nap

Kelly: But ma

Calista: If you want to get better you drink water and you nap

Kelly: Fine but I'm not happy about it

Deanna: Course not

The water and the nap seem to do the trick. Kelly wakes up feeling better and has enough of an appetite to have a late dinner. Since he slept away some of his Sunday he has a long session playing with Bun Bun before he heads back to bed.

Calista and Aaron choose to work from home the next day. While Aaron files documents and attends a deposition Calista spends the morning baking and thinking about her next career steps. In the afternoon she heads to the gym where she runs into Eliza. She also meets the new gym trainer Trevor.

Deanna invites Paris over after school and all the kids are delighted to see the sweets.

Kelly: Cupcakes

Paris: Pink cupcakes

Deanna: Thanks ma

Paris: Yes thanks Mrs York

Calista: You don't have to call me Mrs York

Paris: What then

Deanna: Officer York

*group laughter*

Calista: Calista is fine

While Deanna has to go to computer club Aaron and Calista enjoy getting to know Paris a bit better. If Deanna is home the parents can hardly seem to get a word in when the girls are talking away. Afterwards they all settle down to have dinner together so Paris can avoid the foster home "dinner"

The teen school project this week is a suspension bridge. Like normal Deanna asks her parents to help. Calista has the arts and crafts hobby while Aaron is always happy to check her math for her. Together they make an excellent quality bridge, perfect for all the virtual toy cars.

It should surprise no one that Kelly chooses not to do his homework or school project. Instead he invites Fergus over the road to play some video games. After failing to win puts him in a rage Fergus heads home. Kelly takes out his frustration by scribbling in his journal and fixing some evil plans.

With Deanna at school I realise the building is awfully empty. Thanks to the teleporter I manage to get most students at school even if they don't flag as students. Deanna heads to class and I realise my bigger problem, no teachers have shown up today. Clearly I broke something, sorry virtual peeps.

Paris: This is so weird

Deanna: There must be conflicting mods

Paris: Huh

Deanna: Joey always says that when things go wrong

Paris: Hey did you notice Reece and Samir are talking again

Deanna: I saw them sit together but talking is even better

Paris: Did you help

Deanna: Kiss me and I'll tell you

Deanna is the only one at career day apart from the guests. I get her to chat to them but then we cut our loses and head home early.

I got the regions restriction mod without rereading the high school mod notes that said using both causes teachers to not appear. Region restrictions is gone for now.

Great news, both Aaron and Calista have been promoted. Aaron is now a Promising Prosecutor but damn it his work prep task is still offering representation. Calista turned down covert ops and has picked the military officer path. Her new title is Fourth Lieutenant.

Working from home lets them visit with Devin and Luna who have a visitor. Cassandra is hoping Aaron can give her more information about the supposed contract. Sadly it seems that Dina and Nina do indeed have charge of the capital funds and custody of Milton. But if things change Aaron will help her.

Calista has been working on some newborn onesies and is excited to give them to her daughter-in-law. When one has twins I'm pretty sure you can't have a stockpile of clean clothes that's too large. Calista then knits some more while trying to calm down a still angry Cassandra.

Previous Part ... Next Part

#sims 4 #the sims 4 #the sims #Rotation7 #ChangingPlumbobStorytime #YorkHousehold #ReeceFoster #DeannaYork #KellyYork #CalistaYork #AaronYork #R0703

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ailuropoda-sims · 3 years ago

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❤️Carly Valentine❤️

"Isn't love all we need, is it love?" Hopeless romantic and fashion blogger extraordinaire, Carly's pursuit of her one true soulmate has had its ups and downs. That never stopped her from trying however, and one of these days she's sure that tall, dark, and handsome stud in her dreams will sweep her off her feet! So what's a few…twenty-something or so failed dates and romances in the grand scheme of things, right? What matters is that you keep on trying and trying!

Basic Info: Age: Young Adult (Firmly placing her at 24-25-ish) Pronouns: She/Her Traits: Romantic, Cheerful, Loyal Favorite Foods: Flirty Heart Cookies, Berry Macaroons Favorite Music Stations: Romance Music, Easy Listening

#3 in my ongoing quest to makeover the CAS pre-made sims! <3 Carly was made using the wonderful Kat Jenkins as her base! No changes were made to her body, facial structure, weight, etc. Her official biography made her out to be a hopeless romantic, and I zeroed in on that idea; hence what's more hopelessly romantic than the aesthetic of lovecore/cupidcore! (´♡‿♡`)

Making her was a lot of fun, but there were some troubles I encountered; namely her huge boobs proved to be something of a challenge. (//ω//) I wanted to use a shoulder-slung purses and bags on her but they would clip often because of her breasts or her thick body, which was a shame--plus size Sims need love too!

Anyway! CC used as always will be listed down below! I hope you guys like her as much as I do! v(・∀・*)

General: Hair, Eye Shadow, Eyeliner, Lip Gloss, Blush, Eyelashes

Outfit 1: Earrings, Blouse, Skirt, Bracelet (Base Game), Bra, Nails, Fishnets, Shoes

Outfit 2: Bow, Earrings, Necklace (TSR), Dress, Bracelet, Shoes

Outfit 3: Earrings, Choker, Hoodie, Leggings, Shirt Decal, Chipped Nails, Socks (Original blog no longer is up, so this is a reblog), Sneakers

Outfit 4: Earrings, Choker, Dress, Rings, Nails, Wedges

Outfit 5: Earrings, Choker, Top, Shorts, Bracelets, Bra, Tied Shirt, Socks, Shoes

Outfit 6: Hairband, Earrings, Sweater, Skirt (TSR), Belt, Nails, Leggings (Get To Work), Boots

Poses by: @a-luckyday, @helgatisha, @roselipaofficial, @someone-elsa

Thanks to all the wonderful CC creators! @aharris00britney, @christopher067, @simandy, @infiniteraptor, @cloudcat, @saruin, @miikocc, @candysims4, @serenity-cc, @ikari-sims, @trillyke, @nell-le, @daylifesims, @nords-sims, @sentate, @rustys-cc, @dallasgirl79, @kamiiri, @pralinesims, @marsosims, @solistair, @arethabee, @oswanily, @tukete, @bellassims, @qicc, @kissyck, @enriques4, @isjao, @1-800-cuupid, @b0t0xbrat, @caio-cc, @tamo-sim, @syaovu, @dissiasims, @madlensims

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koishua · 4 years ago

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⸻ ꗃ 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙤𝙛𝙛 𝙡𝙞𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙨.

↷ 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨. sim jake x fem!reader.

↷ 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚. fluff, best friend's brother!au

↷ 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩. 2.1k

↷ 𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨. swearing, some kissing scenes, one pet name (?), aged up by a year or two (?), not high school au that's for sure but also it's never implied if they go to college lmao idk they're just 21 years old end of story

↷ 𝙨𝙮𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨. a little coincidence at the local arcade brings you an opportunity to spend some alone time with your best friend's very handsome brother.

↷ 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙨 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙫. this took an unexpected turn lmao i didn't intend for this to turn into more than a 500 word drabble, yet here we are... ANYWAYS! i would love to see your thoughts on this little fic through your reblogs or in the comments! ty for reading <3

↷ 𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩. @luvvseong @igyus @leavethemonsteralive @intokook @iuwon @renjunvrse @rae-blogging @fairyjunn @honeyseungz @angpambaodnimama (send an ask or dm to be added!)

Guys were… fickle little things— that much you had come to a conclusion with as you watched the brunet bounce up and down in his place at all of the things that give him joy. For a brief moment, too fast that you’d miss if you blink, you see a spark light up his features as you enter through the opening leading into the arcade in the local shopping mall.

It could have been a mirage of what your heart desired, but you were not one to take things too much to heart, dismissing the what ifs crawling their way up from the depths of your mind. Your best friend’s brother was off limits, everyone knew that.

The neon lights and a hall shrouded in dark blues from the LEDs contrast starkly against the cream marble of the rest of the large center, though you guess that was where the first charm lies with these kinds of places. Mysterious, wild in nature— places like these were a hotspot for people to take shelter from the dreary, boring outside world, but you were going off topic once more.

Your eyes sweep over the masses to look for some other familiar faces, but to no avail, your search comes up clean and barren of any of your friends. Jake waves at you to come closer, voice drowned out by the music blasting away from every single machine lining the walls and crowding the middle of the arcade.

“Nice to see you here! Are you here with anyone?” he inserts a coin into the slot to restart the game he had just ended. The screen lights up and a collection of routes and vehicles pop up for selection. Making himself comfortable on the leather seat, you notice the strain on his shirt’s sleeves as he wraps his hands around the steering wheel.

You nod, “Actually, your oh-so wonderful sister was supposed to meet me here, but I couldn’t find her. Do you know where she might be?” You lean against the other seat beside him, the game unplayed when he turns his attention to you, fully taking you in.

His eyes focus back on the game when he replies after pondering for a few seconds, his lower lip saturated from the way he had been nibbling on them, “You were most likely stood up, because as far as I know, she was still snoozing like an hour ago. She probably forgot to set an alarm, I guess.”

You groan, flopping on the sturdy material in disappointment, “Twenty one and still as irresponsible as ever. I should have figured it out.” Jake chuckles, still concentrated on making clean turns to remain in the top ranking.

You fall silent, studying the way his jaw clenches when he almost skids across the wet asphalt, his clenched fists and flexing biceps all seeking your attention. Were his lips always so soft-looking? His mouth curling into an all too knowing smirk, he cheers as he crosses the finish line, adjusting his position to face you, legs spread in their signature wide pose.

“What do you say? Wanna hang out with me for the day?”

With a silver tongue like that, who were you to say no? Nodding, you hop out of the seat and stretch your limbs, “Which one do we play first?” He leans against your side with a shit eating grin, releasing his weight for you to support.

“Hey,” you try to push him off, hands slapping on his arms— oh crap, when did the ten year old boy grow up into this man— to get him to release his tight squeeze on your shoulders, “you’re going to be the death of me.”

The satisfied expression on his face doesn’t relent even after he lets go and clasps his hand around yours to lead you to a closed off booth, black curtain surrounding you and shrouding the place in black. “You are going down, young man.”

“Oh?” He raises his brows, not that you can see, “Is that what you think will happen? Stay humble, brat. It’s you who’ll go back home crying.” He grabs the other fake rifle with a grin.

Your voice gets caught in your throat, furrowing your brows to cock the gun towards the screen where numerous creatures make their way at you, “Brat? You are— what— two months older? Stay down, boy. You haven’t won a single wound against me and you know it.”

Sliding his tongue along the walls of his cheeks, releasing a breath of indignation, he grits his teeth, “Oh yeah? I’ll make you eat those words whole, loser.” Shooting a total of three with a single round of bullets, he aims to kill the four new ones spawning.

“Oh, no you don’t.” In quick succession, you manage to gain the points, crying in triumph. You turn to face him, resting a finger against his chest, seeing the flustered look on his face as the screen brightens up with an explosion.

« PLAYER ONE, YOU WIN. »

From where you stand so close to him, you can see each and every curve making up his structured face— all of the dips and valleys, the way his lips are pursed together and it takes everything in you to not inch closer.

"You were saying?" Your voice clears the air with a teasing melody. The glaring light of the LED screen makes it easier for you to see the subtle, yet noticeable shift in his expression and you hesitate, pulling the finger that had been pressing against the button of his shirt away.

The enclosed booth had never felt this small before where you stand silently, not daring to utter a single word at the boy in front of you, not having a single idea on how hot and blazing his ears feel and how lightheaded he has become from the thought of being this close to the girl he had been dreaming of for years.

Fuck, this is bad. This is really bad, your thoughts are paralleled.

"You know what?" you begin, voice airy as if out of breath, "It's been like ten years since I have known you and you still suck at aiming."

Jake guffaws, "Really? I never noticed!" Words dripping with playful sarcasm, he quietly releases a sigh of relief from the dissipating awkwardness that had been floating in the air, suffocating him.

"You've grown, you know that?" He blinks sheepishly, "What?"

You hum, solidifying your feelings. "You're not the little kid who pretentiously hated chocolate to impress that senior girl who was rumoured to have a thing for buff and healthy guys who only ate organic and never consume candies and gummy bears."

"When did I ever do that?" His body caves in just a little, in stitches from laughing at his own antics, "If anything, it's you who's grown."

It's slow at first, his hands. His right palm moves to gently cup your face, his thumb running along your cheek. His other hand doesn't take long to join in and all of a sudden, you find that both of your cheeks are being cradled like a baby's.

"You are still as cute as ever, though." The crinkle in the corners of his eyes only appears whenever he is genuinely happy, you had always noticed. Was it good that they were there right now?

He speaks as if he would to a small and soft creature, baby-talking at you, "You're so pretty now, aren't you? Yes, you are. Yes, you are—"

"Quit it, I'm not a freaking toddler." Your words are barely understandable when you speak, lips pursed together by the palms squishing your cheeks together.

Jake calms down, releasing his hold on your imprisoned face, now red from a mix of abashment and annoyance. "You are so cute, you kno—"

"Shut up or else I'll kiss you."

His previous words are cut off from continuing and Jake gulps, taking a step forward. Why was the booth so small again and why did the sound of the squelching creatures on the screen seem to die down?

"I really don't mind continuing." He feels impossibly closer now, his breath fanning across your face. He doesn't back down when you stand taller, leaning in, "I don't go back on my words, Jake. Shut up."

It stays like that for a while, the tension thick enough to suffocate you. You only stop and stare, studying each others' eyes closely. His eyes flicker to your lips, coming back up to challenge you for one final time.

"Make me, princess."

You groan, closing what little space was left between your lips, "Screw you."

He is impossibly soft, you notice for the second time, feeling the way his lips brush over yours, testing the waters. Before you even manage to circle an arm around his neck, he brings a palm to hold you, tilting your jaw to follow his lead while his other hand is busy sliding behind your back to pull you closer by your waist.

It feels almost surreal, you don't have the time to even think as you melt into Jake's touches. Was this what feeling weak in your knees meant? A taste of euphoria, blissfully aware of every single place he runs his lips along, he brings heaven right before your eyes.

"She will kill me when she finds out about this," your words come out as muffled mumbles, captured by the way he feels against your mouth, tasting as sweet as nectar. Everytime you come up to breathe, you are pulled down to sink into whatever ecstasy Jake brought to you.

"I have waited so long for this. Who cares about some unsaid rule? 'Best friend's brothers are off limits', my ass." He stops to pant, chest heaving up and down while your hands are interlocked.

He closes his eyes, leaning his forehead against yours, "Just let me be yours."

And you want that just as bad as he does. You want it so terribly much.

"Okay," you squeeze his hand in reassurance. Why does he resemble a puppy so much? One of the world's neverending wonders was the way the man in front of you managed to leave you puzzled consistently everyday.

He was Sim Jake— the little boy who claimed to despise chocolate to impress a girl; the boy who had always taken off with her slippers so that she wouldn't be able to go anywhere; the boy who had the most awkward phases throughout his puberty and high school years; the boy who had fallen down a tree and fractured a bone together with her and he was still that Jake inside.

The dork of a boy who had grown into his skin— now taller, wider and stronger; older and wiser; braver and kinder. Sim Jake was kind with eyes a mirror to the stars and a window to his loving soul. He was beautiful and he was everything you had ever wanted.

"Okay," you repeat for the second time, pulling back to press an additional kiss on the very corner of his lips, "I'm willing to risk my neck for you."

Your jest is taken equally with humor, glad to make him laugh again. No matter how loud and overbearing the background noises grow to become, it doesn't break the peace of the moment. With a final peck on the crown of your head that he places, both hands cupping your face again, you decide to clear the dark space up and step out into the chaos once more.

This time, there is a slight change. Whereas before, he had dragged you in with hands encircling yours nonchalantly, he makes sure to web his fingers through yours now, heart soaring impossibly high with lips spread as wide of a grin as physically possible.

He still carries that overjoyed child within him, you accept defeatedly, affectionately swiping your thumb across the skin of his hand.

You point at yet another game, "Do you want to play that floating table hockey thingy?"

Jake shakes his head, a clear sign of refusal, "Let's stay like this just a bit longer." It takes everything you have not to pull him to a corner to smother him in butterfly kisses all over his face again. If he didn't want to let your hand go just yet, why would you be the one to protest?

Hands locked, hearts locked— you make your way out of the arcade with hands and hearts intertwined.

⸻ ꗃ 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙪𝙨.

"Nice muscles, by the way." You pat his clothed arms.

"I can show them if you want right now—"

"Sim Jake, you can't just strip in the middle of a mall, for fucks' sake."

#enhypen scenarios #enhypen imagines #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen jake #enhypen x reader #enhypen x female reader #enhypen jake x reader #sim jake #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen oneshots

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ask-the-crimson-king · 3 years ago

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I played a game of Horus Heresy with Word Bearers

Yes, the tabletop version. It was done via tabletop sim and I was against a guard list. 1.5k points each cause it was a beginner's game for all of us involved.

And I have learned the following: 1. 5+ Feel No Pains are clutch as fuck 2. Gal Vorbak as troops is a fucking meme. They're pretty expensive but were well worth the points -- Initiative 5 fucking saved me against Ogryns so hard. 3. THE MHARA GAL IS GENUINELY FUCKING OVERPOWERED WHY DOES IT HAVE 8 WOUNDS 4. 14 armor bastions are annoying but not the end of the world. I had 2 lascannons cause I only brought 1 heavy support squad (cause I misinterpreted Breaching on the Mhara Gal's weapons, F) and I only nicked off 1 Hull Point of damage with them. Ever. And my opponent put a fucking MEDUSA SIEGE CANNON IN THERE. Along with about 20 guys. 5. Unswerving Devotion was CLUTCH, along with the new Procurator unit from the Guilden's Star thing. Being able to have a free d6 to help make sure I got my Diabolism off was very very nice.

My opponent didn't want to play marines due to bad experiences with 40k tabletop, hence him playing guard, but it was still a fun game all around. Sweeping Advance is fun, even if I did lose 5 Tac Lads to them failing morale and being out of range of my Warlord. Which sucked but eh, they had done their duty.

But the Mhara Gal is a fucking brutal nightmare. 8 Wounds is kind of fucking insane. Needing to Instant Death it in order to bring it down before it stomps over and whacks you with a S9 AP 2 Brutal 2 Murderous Strike 5+ claw is wowie. And it costs 35 pts less than a squad of Gal Vorbak. Why. Who approved of this. That is insane.

So my personal playgroup are gonna try bringing it down to 5W instead and see if that's a bit more balanced, but maybe it'll seem less insane in a proper 3k pts game. That is going to be attempted at some point.

BUUUUT I do recommend checking out the HH tabletop if you're on the fence about it. Reactions feel way better than stratagems and there's a lot of good fluffy stuff and it overall feels like a more relaxed game. There's some swing but it's enjoyable.

Also Erebus's fucking Warlord Trait is indeed maximum annoying and I've made a deal with a friend who plays UM in 40k to do Calth so I can run a game with him and another with KP. Though the one with KP will also be against Guilliman so that's gonna be a Sunny Funny Death Match. I expect to lose, of course, but it'll be a satisfying loss. Because KP deserves to get curb stomped every once in a while.

Asscravat he is.

Anyway. That's the post. HH 2e good. That is all. Enjoy your day.

#horus heresy #warhammer 40k #warhammer 30k #word bearers #i won btw because my gal vorbak Refused to Fucking DIE #i would not roll 3s and 4s #i would roll either 1s and 2s or 5s and 6s #5+ CLUTCH bro

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haberdashing · 5 years ago

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Biting Your Own Neck (4/?)

Mid-season 2, Jon’s life is abruptly upended by the intrusion of two unexpected and eerily familiar visitors.

on AO3

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4

“You want to talk about trust, about sharing things with each other?” Jon stood up from his seat--Sasha’s seat, a place he never should have had to occupy, a place he never would have occupied if it weren’t for the intruders in their midst--and looked right at Not-Jon (and Not-Martin, by proxy, since the two were standing side by side, nearly touching now). “Fine. You go first. Why are you here?”

“We’re from-” Not-Jon began, but Jon cut him off.

“The future, or a dimension that’s essentially the future? Yes, I got that much already, thank you. Why did you come here from there?”

“We didn’t mean to.” Not-Martin said.

“Martin!”

Jon looked over at Martin when he heard his own voice call Martin’s name; Martin, for his part, was looking right back at him with an expression that seemed somewhere between surprised and terrified, but it was Not-Martin that spoke up.

“Look, Jon, I’m not going to just- just lie to them about what happened-”

“I didn’t say that, did I? I just meant-”

Even before he looked over, Jon could feel Tim and Martin’s gazes darting between him and the actual speakers, Not-Jon and Not-Martin, who apparently also used the names Jon and Martin for one another as well as having the same voices that the actual Jon and Martin did...

“Can we start by having you two pick different names? We’re-” Jon waved his arm in a sweeping gesture to indicate that he was including Martin in particular. “-already using Jon and Martin at the moment, as it happens.”

“I’m not going to stop calling him-” Not-Jon gestured towards Not-Martin, and Jon noted with a sinking stomach that the gesture was eerily similar to the one he himself had just made. “-Martin. That’s his name.”

“Fine, then, you two can call each other whatever, but we need something for the rest of us to call you, unless you want me to just keep thinking of you as Not-Me and Not-Martin for as long as you’re here.”

Not-Jon and Not-Martin both paled visibly at the words; Jon wondered, idly, what their own experiences with Not-Sasha were, if they really were from the future, presumably one where she hadn’t been so suddenly unmasked by another duo of imposters. Probably not terribly pleasant, judging from the grimaces on both their faces.

Not-Jon nodded once. “Fair enough. Perhaps just a variation of your name that you don’t normally use would work--Sims, perhaps, or Jonathan...”

Jon shook his head. “No. Those are still my name, and you’re still not getting any part of my identity out of this.”

Not-Martin let out a soft sigh and a slight shrug of the shoulders. “Did you have something in mind, then? I mean, it is your plan and all...”

“Er...”

Jon had not in fact had anything in particular in mind, had only a nebulous idea of what he didn’t want these doppelgangers going by, but as he thought about it, an idea came to mind.

“You want a version of my name that badly? You can be Jonny. Nobody’s called me that for some time now, so there should be no chance of confusion.”

Not-Jon--no, Jonny let out a rough laugh. “Fine by me, though don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing there. But if you insist, I will be Jonny D’Ville,” Jonny leaned forward in an exaggerated bow. “Your humble captain.”

Jon could feel his face heating up, which only intensified as he heard Tim call out “First mate!” from his seat nearby.

Jon was only able to stammer out a soft “That works” before Tim spoke up again, this time looking Jon’s way as he spoke.

“Hang on, since when do you know about the Mechanisms? Don’t tell me you only get won over by my musical tastes in the future-”

Jonny replied with a quick “No” before Jon could bring himself to do the same.

“So what’s the story, then? You said you weren’t into them!”

Jon let out a sigh before responding. “Technically, what I said was I wasn’t in the habit of listening to their CDs.”

“Close enough. Did you just change your mind, or what?”

Jon looked away from Tim, only to see Jonny was gazing his way as well.

“You might as well tell him.” Jonny was grinning and looked a bit like he was trying to stifle a laugh.

“Tell me what?”

He wasn’t getting out of this one, now, was he?

Jon pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes briefly. “I’m pretty sure most musicians aren’t in the habit of listening to CDs of their own work, Tim.”

“You’re... you’re saying you were in the Mechanisms.” Tim’s gaze darted between Jon and Jonny. “You’re saying you’re Jonny fucking D’Ville?”

“...yes.”

Tim raised an eyebrow. “Prove it, then.”

Jon did his best to mimic the gesture as he looked back at Tim. “Why would I lie about this?”

“I mean, either you were lying then or you’re lying now, so...”

“It wasn’t technically...” Jon let his speech trail off as he realized that fighting over the point was probably detrimental to the whole trust thing Jonny was trying to encourage in them. (Had he predicted this happening, or even somehow orchestrated the whole thing?)

“Alright. Alright, I’ll prove it.”

And then Jon began to chant. It was the first thing that came to mind that would serve as proper proof, not just something that would show his vocal talents but something that even most fans of the band wouldn’t have bothered to memorize...

“Y'AI 'NG'NGAH, YOG-SOTHOTH H'EE-L'GEB F'AI THRODOG UAAAH-”

Jon was pretty sure he heard somebody quietly laughing in the background, though he couldn’t recognize the laugh by sound alone and didn’t want to look around, didn’t want to see all the strange expressions that must be on everybody’s faces just to know who the culprit was.

“-OGTHROD AI'F GEB'L-EE'H YOG-SOTHOTH 'NGAH'NG AI'Y ZHRO-”

Jon did, however, glance over at Jonny briefly, only to see that not only was he not the one laughing, he was either mouthing or singing along to the chant. (It was hard to say which, especially when Jon knew well enough that Jonny’s voice would sound the same as his own, so he couldn’t just listen for a different voice joining in.)

Jon went on for another line or two of chanting before trailing off, looking over at a dumbfounded Tim with a half-suppressed grin on his face.

“Is that proof enough for you?”

There was silence for a moment before Martin spoke up. “...what kind of band is this, exactly?”

Jon looked over at Jonny, though he couldn’t say exactly why, but Jonny just shook his head. “Think you can handle this one on your own.”

“It’s a, a band of immortal space pirates that all live on the same spaceship, Jonny D’Ville being the lead singer and, and also the first mate, they tell stories based on folklore and mythology but all adapted for a science fiction setting...”

“God, you’re talented.”

Jon glanced at Not-Martin first before finding the actual source of the words in Martin, whose face was rapidly reddening as he added, “Well, I mean, I, I knew that already of course, but... Musically. I didn’t know you were so musically talented.”

Jon let out a harsh laugh. “If you think I’m talented, you should meet Morgan. He played four different instruments for the band--four! All I can do is sing and work the harmonica a bit.”

“Still...”

“Why didn’t you just tell me about all this when it came out before?” Tim interrupted. “You knew I liked the band, after all, so why not just take the credit?”

“I, uh.” Jon could feel his face heating up again. “It, it was shortly after I got promoted, and I just, I didn’t think-”

“Oh, I see. You didn’t think being part of an awesome band of space pirates fit the image you were going for as ‘Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London’, is that it?”

Jon wasn’t sure what to focus on--the truth of Tim’s accusation and how petty and simple those worries about his professional image seemed now, how eerily accurate Tim’s impression of how Jon started every statement tape was, how he could hear his own voice softly laughing as Jonny quietly cracked up...

Jon settled for resting his face in his own hands such that he could avoid looking at anyone.

“So we’ve got my name settled, then.” Jonny said, the voice enough to get Jon to look up again. “But what about Martin--my Martin, I mean?”

Was there something weirdly possessive in the way Jonny said my Martin, like they were a unit, two halves of a whole, or was Jon imagining it?

“Er.”

“Um.”

The two Martins stared at least other for a long moment, neither one rushing to give a response, and Jon couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of it. If their story was a lie, if this other Martin was just an imitation of the real thing, Jon had to admit that it was an awfully good imitation.

“Kay?”

It took Jon a moment to recognize that Not-Martin hadn’t just abbreviated the word “okay” there, was in fact proposing Kay as a name for himself. Kay as in the letter, presumably, as in the middle initial in Martin K. Blackwood that Jon still didn’t know the full version of, even though he’d done rather a lot of research into his coworkers in the last few months...

Martin hesitated for a moment before tersely nodding. “Yeah, Kay, that works for me if it works for you.”

“I wouldn’t have suggested it if it didn’t work for me, would I?”

“...fair point.”

“Sounds like we’ve got that settled then. I’m Jonny, and he’s Kay, at least as far as you lot are concerned.”

“Who are you calling ‘you lot’?” Tim asked. “And why don’t I get a freaky supernatural future double like you two do, anyway?”

Jonny and Kay exchanged a glance before the latter spoke up.

“...I think we’d better save that particular story for a bit later on.”

#tma #tma au #tma fic #tma fanfic #the magnus archives #the magnus archives au #the magnus archives fic #the magnus archives fanfic #personal #my writing

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formulazero · 4 years ago

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You've created a racing team last week so how about a another team but in a non motor-sport of your choice. Which driver would be in your team? Which sport would you choose? Who would be captain (if it's a team sport)? Who would be the coach?

hello fe anon!!

so a little while back i assigned the f1 2020 grid seats/boats/etc. as if they were a crew and i am just going to do that again but for the fe 2021 grid

this got mad long! it will be below the cut.

i’m not gonna limit myself to just 8s & other sweep boats bc thats boring as fuck SO:

our first boat is gonna be the eight though and that would be: nyck cox, sam stroke, oliver turvey 7seat, nico 6seat, edo 5seat, tom 4seat, max 3seat, andre 2seat, jev bow. this is a bit of a weird lineup, but hear me out. nyck is coxing because hes pocket sized. sorry nyck. i also think he would be good at it, though!! he’s loud but very calm & i think he’d be a good steady hand to steer and run the crew. sam would be an excellent stroke– consistent, strong, That Bitch– and oli turvey– also consistent & strong & that bitch– would round out that pair very well. think the two of them together are pretty smart & would be able to respond to nyck’s direction very well. nico, edo, tom, & max are all pretty strong and consistent they just have middle of the 8 vibes idk what to tell u. very strongly believe that nico and tom are port & edo and max are starboard. its the vibes. our bow pair is ofc jeandre because they work very well together & they have bow pair energy. really its just vibes but it makes sense trust me

our second boat would be a quad with antonio bow, robin 2seat, alex lynn 3seat, and mitch stroke. feel like mitch is pretty consistent & steady, & antonio is generally pretty aware of his surroundings & good at steering/leading his crew/whatever. think robin would be an EXCELLENT seat pair w/ antonio & the same for alex w/ mitch. overall, a pretty synched up, fast boat! they would 100% be so annoying off the water though like could you IMAGINE. these are the bitches that put a hammock up in the trailer and somehow you’re both jealous that you didnt think of it sooner and annoyed because you can’t put your shit in the trailer with how low they tied it

our third boat is a séb (bow) and oliver rowland (stroke) double because i think it would be fun and also its very perfect for the two of them

our fourth boat is gonna be the novice four of nick stroke, jake 2seat, norman 3seat, and sergio in bow, coxed by alexander sims. theyre strong but a mess. don’t worry, they’ll get the hang of it! they’re in good hands w/ alexander, he’s calm and knows what he’s doing.

our fifth boat is a double (because fuck pairs all my homies hate pairs. also doubles my beloved <3) of stoffel (stroke) and pascal (bow). its a weird pairing, but it makes sense. stof is consistent & determined, & pascal is really dynamic & smart. theyd work well together, i think!

our coaches are the audi boys! rene’s head coach, he makes sure the novices don’t drown & makes sure shit is running. lucas is the asshole coach that knows a lot about what he’s talking about and is super helpful but also you’re scared of him and you don’t want him to pay attention to you on test piece days. and yes, daniel is here too, because i miss him. daniel is the coach that used to row for the team but got too old and doesn’t have anything better to do so he’s kinda one of the boys except he’s driving the launch now

anyway thats a super long breakdown but i stand by it <3

#ask #fe anon #long post #OHHH baby

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pearlnwade · 5 years ago

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LEMONADE

I have often considered myself beautiful and attractive; but not on days like this. Welcome to the real-world Olly.

I’d always been excited about NYSC because it was my only way out from my father’s house. I’ll have the opportunity to move to a different state—far from Lagos —and gain a great level of independence. Really, that was all I wanted, and at the beginning, it seemed like a perfect plan.

On the 8th of January 2019, at about 7am, I got what was long coming—the official end of my already dead relationship. If I’m being honest, I’d seen it coming from a mile away. So when it finally happened, I didn’t even know how to react. There was just complete uncertainty and it literally sent chills down my spine. The 8th of January was also the day I was leaving for Abuja, to start my NYSC —the next and exciting chapter in my life. Sadly, the dream of going through this phase of life with a partner to share it all with, was now nothing but shards of a beautiful glass. I got on a plane to Abuja that evening and convinced myself that I was going to be alright, I’m a strong woman after all. But honestly, I wasn’t even close to it. And one thing I was sure of is: no matter how much you try to hide your feelings and lie to everyone that you are okay, YOU JUST CAN’T LIE TO YOURSELF.

The 9th of January 2019 was initially dedicated to rounding up my NYSC registration, but everything took a wrong turn when my phone got stolen. I rushed to the Airtel office to get my sim disabled, but they said that they couldn’t do it unless I swore an affidavit. Can things just get any worse? Yes, it just began.

On the 10th of January 2019, I went to the court to get a sworn affidavit. Before going there, I withdrew 3k, just in case I need to pay for whatever was required. But little did I know it was a wrong move. After I got my affidavit, I followed my friend to Jos — I had planned to do this for a while—I needed somewhere to cool off. You know, blow off some steam. I love Jos for one particular reason: cheap and beautiful nails! It's crazy how affordable it is compared to other parts of Nigeria and I really wanted to do my nail. Like I said, blowing off some steam.

The next morning, I arrived at the salon and of course, I picked the best style. I had N2,200 with me, and the total of my nails cost N2,400. So, I told the nail artist that I had only N2,200 cash that I didn’t want to spend my entire cash at hand. I also made her understand that I’d have transferred to her, but I couldn’t send money because I had no phone. To ease her worry, I told her to hold on to my purse and N2,000 of the total amount I had; I was going to get a keke ride to the ATM to withdraw some cash. When I got to the ATM, I made the request to be dispensed N3,000 and the response was “insufficient funds”. I was confused. I made a second request for N1,000 and it said the same thing. Now, in the midst of strangers I was about to just lose it. I decided to check the total of what was in my account and I saw N4. Wait what! Four naira? It’s a joke right? Everything I felt that day is like a scar in my skin right now, because as I type these words, I feel the rush all over. Anyway, I put myself together and went home. Basically, I had no relationship, no phone and no money—all within 3 days. Wondering if I didn’t pay for those nails? Well, thankfully, I did. My friend helped me pay the rest for the nails. God bless you Emily. My trip back to Abuja that Sunday was a reflective one. And the worst part was I felt that I deserved every single thing that happened to me. Did I?

I indulged in a couple of dates afterwards: to remind or convince myself that I could still be desired by men; anything to find value in an empty space. I was broken, but tried my best to keep working— it’s how I have been programmed to act, since I was a girl. On days like this, I didn’t feel beautiful. I felt stuck, like there was a bottomless pit of lacking that I desperately wanted to fill. I didn’t feel smart and I didn’t trust anyone.

My ex came to Abuja, (we had reconnected a couple weeks before he arrived) so I had my hopes up that things were going to get a lot better. But it didn't. Infact, I had never felt that disrespected in my life, I felt so little and helpless. “Certain things happen for things to get better”- Olly. Hold on to that quote because I sure didn’t. I know that if I did, my emotions would have been more defined to make me stronger not to break me down.

“It’s time to move out of (my ex’s friend’s) house” my ex told me before he left for Lagos. To avoid further humiliations and belittling, and to keep my boss babe rep, I told him that I had a place to stay. But I didn’t. I had no single idea where I was going to stay. That Sunday when he left, I decided that I was going to call a couple people and if push comes to shove, I will rent my own place. The push came to shove and I started pulling funds—from my parents and my brother really. I raised enough money just for the house rent. The cost of ordinary foam to sleep on was yet unaffordable. I was so sad, continuously asking myself if coming to Abuja was the best option for me.

On a special Wednesday, I had to leave the house that I was staying in, after having packed all my things in less than 15 minutes. By exactly 9:56pm, I entered my cab with my luggage, on the move in the middle of the night looking for where I could rest my head. Now, I had a couple options, unfortunately, 99% of them wanted to sleep with me, but my 1% was Diamond. She did a lot for me throughout my early stay in Abuja. She was my go-to girl and of course she had my back on days like this. I stayed with her for about five days but had to leave. I had already spent more than N30,000 in search for a house and I still did not have one. I was frustrated and desperate to find a house and I did. You know that phrase “do not make any decision when you are desperate’, I didn’t follow it. I paid for a bad house that I would have spent more than N200,000 to renovate before even buying my bed. I lost N40,000, and because I was losing so much money and wanted a way out, I lost an additional N120,000. At this point, I still didn’t have a house. What is my next step? I thought. I felt no love and zero trust in anyone. Like no one!

MY LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL

People always use the phrase “though trouble lasts all night, joy comes in the morning”. I got a phone call on a very special Sunday night. It was my mum telling me that it only gets better, and I am to move into Justice’s house. What?! For real? Everything since then has been sweet and smooth. The end is pretty amazing. I am still looking for the guy that’ll sweep me off my feet, make me feel safe and loved. I am quite happy; and for the first time in a long time, things are finally working out for me. I am still healing, I mean, it takes time, but I am healing. There are parts of this story that weren't typed in this article, but if you ask me out and buy me a drink after this lockdown, I might consider telling you the juicy, intimate details.

I went through most of this without Jesus; I always forget that He is a constant. He was meant to be my constant not anyone else.

Cheers to happiness.

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cawthorntales · 2 years ago

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This is a temp pic of him for this post until I can do a better one. Story intro and info to send your sim is all below this.

~~~~

Producer: Ready when you are Johnny.

*Johnny deeply sighs.

Johnny: Hi my name is Johnny Zest. I’m twenty nine years old and a recent resident of Moonwood Mills moving here nine years ago from Oasis Springs. I didn’t want to bring up much from my past in this tape, but was advised that I had too for transparency sake.

I’m a member of the Landgraab family. I know what you’re thinking and yes I do mean the extremely wealthy Landgraab family. However they disowned me a long time ago so if you’re planning to enter this hoping for a way into their circle. You’re out of luck I am afraid.

Why am I doing a bachelor challenger? Among other reasons, I’ve been unlucky in the love department. When I was younger I used to chase the fairy tale idea of love. The type of love we see in books, movies, tv shows, etc. I thought my prince charming would sweep me off my feet.

However I’m older now and know that fairy tales are just that. Tales. I know now my prince charming isn’t out there. But I’m not looking for a perfect flawless prince anymore. I’ve not been in front of a camera since I moved here as shortly after doing so I had a life changing incident that took some time to recover from. But I am better now and looking to give this a chance. I look forward to hearing from you.

~~~

Signup info

No elimination challenges. Just reward challenges and such.

Contestants must be male.

Contestants must have a picture.

Contestants doesn't have to have a bio. Just need a name, age and why they are entering the BC. If you do want to do a bio you can.

Contestants must have at least one “negative” trait. The trait can be any of your choosing.

I own Werewolves and Cats and Dogs so please stick to those packs only.

CC is fine. Just no skin defaults or eye defaults and please don’t go overboard.

In a private message tell me your guys motive for doing the bc. Is he doing it for fame? Is he doing it for love? Is he doing it hoping to get his hands on money? Note your answer will not affect outcomes in anyway. It is just to help me write characters and build the world around this.

Slots

Reserved

2) Reserved

3) Reserved

#sims 4 #simblr

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gothamdetected-a · 5 years ago

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multiverse.

i know what you’re thinking. sim are you absolutely fucking insane, don’t even TRY to tackle this one. you’re right i am insane. and yes i am still going to try and tackle a meta about DC multiverses HOWEVER, to give myself on shred of sanity on this treacherous journey, i will say that this is mainly going to be about the multiverse from a bruce perspective. this ride is a batman focused train i’m afraid. also i want to state that this is by no means a perfect explanation – i’m a) trying to keep it simple and b) still am lost on parts of the timeline myself so. its what i can offer.

ok so, originally NCP, or the national comics publication (who will one day become DC), wrote their golden age heroes on an earth now designated as earth-2. in the 30s, just before the war, comic books absolutely exploded as a media format, and a bunch of companies all jumped the gun on creating superheroes. many of DCs most endearing and recognisable heroes were created all the way back then, however many of them also are not quite who you will recognise as the character today. hal jordan wasn’t green lantern, but was instead a man called alan scott, jay garrick was the flash instead of barry allen etc etc. don’t worry though! batman is still batman, and has been bruce wayne since 1939. earth-2 batman, as he will come to be known, is a bright kind of guy found on technicolour pages with a cute lil robin by his side – there is a reason for this. the war. literally NCP said we cant be sending out dark and gritty comics to people dying in trenches so time to make it colourful and faintly ridiculous, and bruce wayne is a surprisingly optimistic guy for a man who watched his parents be slaughtered in front of him.

of course, by the 60s, NCP (who are also sort of known as NPP and really known by your average joe as superman-dc, based on their most successful comic runs) had realised their timelines were getting a bit squiggly for their golden age heroes, and most of them had been replaced out by their silver age counterparts anyway. so between 1961 and 1963, NCP start creating another “earth”, officially designated earth-1, which would become their main planet for all kinds of superhero shenanigans. the justice society of america becomes the justice league of america, and when you think of batman, you’re probably thinking of earth-1 batman. at least pre crisis. and, once they get taste for building whole new earths, we also get earth-3 (1964), or “opposite world”, where the good guys are bad guys, and batman is owlman and instead of the jla we have the crime syndicate of america.

so sim, what other earths did dc come up with? well, i literally refuse to list them all because it was a multiverse and they did not slow down, but the ones that are most important to me are earth-5 where the only hero to live on this planet is bruce wayne/batman, and earth-89 where lois marries bruce instead of clark ahAHAHHAA. but i can tell you that pre-crisis there are 91 designated earths, and basically it could have gone on forever. there was an earth-c minus, earth-124.1, an earth where everyone was reptiles, honestly it was a MESS. and therein lies the problem.

now i’ve just used the term “pre-crisis”. what’s that, sim? maybe you’re not very familiar with comics, or with the recent dctv version of said comics, and so i will endeavour to explain one of the most brain numbing storylines that spans DC. also known as a retcon. see all these earths with their own histories and heroes and well everything really was becoming very inconvenient and meant a lot of world jumping and who can interact with who and everything was getting like spaghetti because they couldn’t calm down on the earth-building. so DC (who are officially DC at this point, 1977 babeyy), specifically a guy called marv wolfman (coolest name ever) who was sick of so many earths, comes up with the bright idea that will later form into a comic run called crisis on infinite earths (1985-1986). it was a serious crossover event, really considered by many to be the first of its kind. it sold extremely well, boosting dc’s flagging sales against it’s biggest rival, marvel. and as for the plot, it’s a bit convoluted but essentially some bloke turns up and starts to destroy all these worlds, and it becomes a race between the heroes and villains as to who can save/conquer the remaining earths that are left. although there are crises before and after this specific run, pre-crisis basically always refers to this particular crisis event, as it really shaped DC for the next 30 years.

for a while the retcon does an okay job of keeping the number of earths low. there’s still some earths that are considered non-continuous floating around, but mainly there’s just earth-1, which is now a merger of the most important “earths” that existed pre-crisis, and a way for all of DCs heroes to now be in one place and interact with each other. other earths at this point include;

earth-23 (1986) – a small pocket dimension

earth-17 (1990) – we don’t talk about this. honestly spare yourself and. don’t look. its horrific.

earth-27 (1990) – a historically divergent planet with a hero actually called vegetable man.

earth-85 (1987) – a hodgepodge of post-crisis characters live here, chillin

earth-988 (1990) – superboy is the only hero in this universe

the antimatter universe – all of pre-crisis’ earth-3 villains, including owlman, get shoved here for later use when dc need a couple of villains to come back.

and for a while all is well. then comes DC elseworlds (1989). which. you know. i love. it gave me victorian batman. pirate batman. caveman batman. vampire batman. frankenstein batman. terrorist batman fighting against russian!superman. they even gave me marvel crossovers, with captain america meeting batman. it was a glorious time. technically elseworlds is not considered canon, ran outside of canon as a way for writers to explore those wacky kind of worlds lost to the crisis, which is dumb because some of the plot lines are both hilarious and incredible. but the numbers started to get ridiculous again. most elseworlds are named after the year that the plot takes place in, so we get earth-1889, earth-1938 etc, but even more of them just seem to have random designations. i think by the time they reached earth-5050 they sort of knew that theyd fucked up again. we’ve had zero hour, we’ve got hypertime and kingdom come, and besides, its been a while since they had a good crossover, so by the time 2005 rolls around its time for crisis pt 2 (because dc love to use the word crisis for crossovers) or as it’s officially known infinite crisis. infinite crisis has an even more confusing plot involving a bunch of slightly nuts versions of characters escaping a pocket dimension, earths being created and then merged, and a rogue ai which batman made and then has to destroy because his own creation becomes too powerful etc etc. the only good thing to come out of it was earth-0, or bizarro world, because bizarro & batzarro are my babies. don’t worry though, this new set of earths won’t last long either, as in 2008 DC conclude their trilogy of crises with final crisis that featured one of the most important events in batman’s history – darkseid “killing” him. yes the quotations are important. i’ll leave you to infer what they mean.

so 3 crises later and everything is still just as messy as they’ve ever been and there’s 60 years worth of comic history being tangled about, and marvel had already established a very successful reboot in 2000, and anything marvel do, we can do better, so DC do their first, full and proper reboot. unlike retcons before it, which is where they retroactively try to fix what people already know and simplify timelines & earths, this is like someone shaking the etch-a-sketch and starting fresh. back in infinite crisis an arbitrary number was assigned to how many “earths” there could be – 52. and so in 2011, DC go hey that’s neat and create what becomes known as the new- or nu-52. heroes are given shiny new backstories, everything is streamlined and wonderful, sales rise, DC has a clean slate to build off again.

ha.

yeah that doesn’t happen.

this reboot, also known as flashpoint, due to it being spawned from another big ol’ crossover of the same name, shows barry allen trapped in an alternate universe where everything is not quite right – his mother is alive, superman is nowhere to be found and he doesn’t have his powers. worst of all thomas wayne is batman. yeah, batman’s dad is batman. thanks DC, i hate it. reverse-flash has tried to change history and stop the jla from ever being formed – le gasp. barry goes to fix it, merges three universes together – earth-0, which isn’t a bizarro world but now the “main" earth, also called new earth or prime earth (DC), earth-13 (vertigo) and earth-50 (wildstorm), but also causes 10 years to be “lost” to these characters. there are now 52 brand spanking new earths, each sitting in their own universe as part of the multiverse. no one remembers anything except barry. even for a reboot and convergence of DC’s franchises, it’s messy as fuck. and it goes to shit very very quickly. people don’t really like n-52. DC have cancelled everything, certain characters such as cassandra cain-wayne are fucking ERASED from existence, no one likes the new costume designs, its an absolute shit show and the plots get very confusing very quickly.

so what do DC do?

they reboot again. sigh.

only 5 years after the mess of nu-52, they produce DC rebirth, a new relaunch of all their famous runs. brainiac does some magic and collects a bunch of worlds together and magically we’re all going to forget the last 5 years of comic hell. it is a reboot to retcon flashpoint as though that never happened. yes, DC are actually retconning their own reboots. talk about sweeping it under the carpet. technically “rebirth” only ran for a year as a promotional thing for the reboot, before joining with the larger, now-singular DC universe, however everyone still calls it rebirth because if we don’t give these things names it will get even more fucking confusing than it already is. rebirth also still has 52 universes making up the DC multiverse, just to make things even more simple and easy to understand (DC what is it with 52. why 52.) although lots of the earths in this multiverse have been re-designated – eg. pre-crisis earth-31 was home to an aged batman who fakes his death to go train a bunch of new vigilantes (the dark knight returns), and now 31 is an apocalyptic wasteland or some shite. a lot of these earths were re-designated during the flashpoint/nu-52 era, and even though rebirth was supposed to erase that, DC have decided never mind we’ll keep it. there’s also 7 mysteriously undesignated earths – ooh spooky, they definitely won’t feature in the next major crossover. also for a multiverse with 52 universes, they sure do have more than 52 : there’s the microverse, a bunch of universes collectively called “the sphere of the gods” where apokalips and like, literal heaven & hell exist, an innerverse???, dreamworld, limbo, DC are taking the piss they only said there were 52 earths but that means they can make as many other shitty dimensions and pocket-universes as they please apparently. don’t even get me started on the source wall. for the most part the writers just. don’t acknowledge this and stick to the main prime earth. for the most part. thanks for throwing thomas wayne as batman back into the mix, rebirth.

so that’s the last of it, right sim? eh, almost. it should have been the last of it, really. and then geoff johns couldn't keep his mouth shut and produced possibly the worst comic in recent history, if not ever, doomsday clock. now doomsday clock is a nightmare for an impossibly long list of reasons that i won’t get into here because this isn’t a rant about why i think doomsday clock is the worst thing to ever happen to dc (although that’s a catchy title i should use that some day) - no, the reason i bring up doomsday clock is because. oh my god even saying this makes me sad. doomsday clock proves that the pre-crisis universes still exist and are still out there. somewhere. canonically. sim why is that sad i thought you liked everything pre-52. it’s sad because it means at any point now, DC could bring them back, ruin their own legacy, make everything even more confusing than it already is. i love pre-52 stuff but you gotta leave it alone. currently doomsday clock has only established that these universes exist as a way to honour every era of superman, because DC didn’t want to completly erase some of the incredible work and storylines put into him as a character. fine, fair enough. but it does leave the possibility that they will try and return to them too. comic book writers love doing funky story lines like that. they think they need to write something that’s never been done before and instead of coming up with something actually unique, they just poke around in the multiverse WHICH IS HOW WE ENDED UP WITH THIS AS A PROBLEM IN THE FIRST PLACE.

ahem.

hopefully this helped clarify some stuff for people, especially those folks who aren’t big comic fans/expereience dc through the DCEU or DCTV, when encountering rpers who say they base their characterisation off of, for example pre-n52/flashpoint comics, like myself.

oh, and thank you for coming to my ted sim talk.

#i dont know if i can put this as a meta #its just me ranting again #hm #\system\directory\hidden.txt ›› META #long post /

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scni · 5 years ago

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chicago’s very own addison sani has been spotted on madison avenue driving a rolls-royce wraith , welcome ! your resemblance to greta onieogou is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty fourth birthday bash . your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re reactive , but being tenderhearted might help you . i think being a virgo explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be walking out of a casino with double the money you walked in with, sunkissed skin all year round, drunkenly dancing on a table . ( my dad has ties to the mafia and when things started getting out of hand my mom forced him out of our lives what she doesn’t know is that i meet him for lunch every week ) & ( cisfemale + she/her ) + ( taylor , twenty , she/her , est )

wow ok guys , this took me alot longer than i expected ? i’m TIRED , lol . i’m taylor though , hi legends ! i’m 20 and live in the est + go by she / her pronouns . a little about me before we get to my lil baby — i spend too much time in the timewrap that is youtube where i’ll watch a ricky thompson video one minute then daily vlogs of a raccoon to mgk’s kelly vision vlogs true story , this MAY have happened while i was supposed to be getting this intro up 🥺 i’m a total music whore and love everything that has a good flow idc if it’s rap or country if it’s good it’s lit ! also heads up i have the attention span of a squirrel so if i don’t respond to a thread or ims it’s because im a dumb hoe , i still love ya . anyways , enough about me lets get this intro rolling ! give this a like if you’d like to plot . ALSO ? i know the background is a lil long it was honestly mostly for me to really flesh addison out and give me something to look back to , so if you wanna get to the point of the intro just skip the background ? there is a tl;dr after it followed by her personality / secret / stats + some basic wcs toward the end of the post !

* 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 !

addison mikhailovna sani , was born in saint petersburg , russia where she grew up in a home too big to even be referred to as a house . she wasn’t the first child of ivanka and mikhail but she definitely was their first planned child . a couple that met early in their twenties , had their moments but at the end of the day they loved one another . both extremely traditional and their beliefs , they were given no choice but to accelerate their love story when they turned up pregnant with their son . he was a beautiful and happy little boy , but posed a threat the ivanka and mikhail’s pretty storybook life they wanted to set up for themselves . obsessed with staying on some sort of timeline , ivanka began her campaign for her budding political career . then she turned up pregnant again , with their second child , a daughter this time . in their eyes their daughter was just another bump in their perfect life . they held a sort of resentment against the kids for that , especially given that ivanka had lost her window of political popularity . she’d resigned to the life of a socialite and stay at home mom and they decided the best way to fill her time up was with another child . this time , one they truly wanted . her parents would never admit it , but they hadn’t seen the true “ sani potential “ in their children that wasn’t until they had addison . her parents truly doted on her . from her point of view life was perfect . silver spoon life did her well . that was until the perfect facade the sani’s held up was beginning to crumble before their eyes . her father , a wealthy international real estate investor comes from a crime family , it was a world he hid in the shadows but things grew rather messy and the family was posed with a choice (a) leave russia and start up life somewhere else or (b) stay in russia and chance mikhail going to jail for the entirety of the kids childhood . of course they chose to leave russia , on the one promise to ivanka that mikhail was done with the life of organized crime .

they made the move to chicago , illinois when addison was just ten years old . luckily for her she’d grown up speaking three languages russian , nigerian , and english and so coming to america was made just a bit easier for her as she wasn’t completely fluent but was able to get by and converse with others . her parents quickly integrated themselves into the elite society within chicago’s wealthiest families , which wasn’t too hard with her father’s up - and - up line of work of real estate investing and her mother’s status as an heiress . the same could be said for the kids at school , each one integrating fairly well into their own friend groups . like at home stayed the same , they may have been in a new country but her parents love or obsession with addison knew no borders . she had everything a little girl could ask for and more , plus her busy parents actually made time for her - that was much more than her siblings could say . addison knew the dynamic , she was a smart girl and picked up on it quickly . often apologizing to her older siblings and offering up her own support for their lives in place of their parents . as she grew older the pressure from her family started taking it’s toll . when ivanka and mikhail sani thought you were destined to be great , they really pushed you and placed the highest of expectations on you . addison carried around the fear that one day they’d look at her the same way they did her siblings and so she worked herself in all aspects of her life to be the perfect daughter . she excelled at everything she did - academics , ballet , student government , and even becoming a debutante .

it wasn’t until she was sixteen that the toll really started chipping away at addison . she’d spent a month on a downward spiral; popping pills , drowning herself in alcohol , losing her virginity , and throwing parties . it all came to a head when she stole millions from her father’s secret stash and booked a private jet with a couple friends . the three went missing for nearly two weeks before they were spotted at a resort in ibiza . her parents brought her home only to send her away to an inpatient program for a little over a month . addison spent that month really digging deep , finding out who she was and what she actually wanted . her therapist had told her for her to get out of the dark place she was in she’d need to separate her thinking from her parents and let go of the perfectionist act . when she came back home it was like the last few months had never happened , her parents ignored it all . to them , the issue was fixed and now it was time to sweep it under the rug but for addison it broke her heart . she realized over that next year that her parents didn’t see her as a person with her own choices but instead some sort of maniquin for them to play some weird version of real life sims with . despite this realization she couldn’t help but to fall back in line .

senior year of high school came quick and the four years of student government , mock trial , equestrian , and perfect grades was nearly over but not before addison’s whole world crumbled before her . no matter how perfect she tried to be the sani’s could never run from the truth . they weren’t this perfect family , when her mom caught her dad tied up with the russian mafia within the city of chicago it was over . by the end of the night ivanka was kicking him out of the house , with the threat that if he so much as looked in the direction of her and the kids she’d have him sent to jail for the rest of his natural life . the threat was enough to spook him , he’d known her well enough to know she wasn’t bluffing . just a few months later he moved out of the state leaving secret letters for the children to let them know he loved them . but of course , addison wasn’t allowed to so much as miss a beat . ivanka was still on her like some crazed momager and when she landed multiple acceptances in some of the top schools across the country the two inevitably made the decision for addison to attend yale . secretly she wanted stanford but bit the bullet . she studied finance with a major in philosophy . joined a sorority and mock trial . in truth she took a liking to connecticut and the change of scenery helped her forget about everything happening back in chicago .

during her senior year at yale , her mom broke the news of the family making the big move to new york city . which really just meant addison and her mom were moving to new york city because her brother had started a family in his college town of durham , north carolina + was also playing for the carolina panthers while her sister traveling the world on some sort of instagram model high . her mom rambled on for week about how the move was perfect since addison would be attending columbia for law school so now the two could see one another more often . even at twenty two addison couldn’t put her foot down when it came to her mom and so for the millionth time in her life she held back what she really wanted to do ( finally going to stanford , for law school ) and committed to columbia law .

* 𝐭𝐥;𝐝𝐫 !

basically , addison is the baby of three kids . born in st petersburg , russia but grew up in chicago . she was always the favorite of her parents ivanka ( a russian heiress + philanthropist ) and mikhail ( a international real estate investor ) as she grew older she realized their love was more of a obsession with control + perpetuating a picture of a perfect family + daughter . the pressure to a toll on addison during highschool and she had a break down that led to a major downward spiral landing her in an inpatient facility for a month . when she got out , her parents ignored all the issues within the family and went back to treating addison like some sort of puppet + addison continued to go along with it , as she didn’t really know how else to be . today she struggles with being who she wants to be and who her mom wants her to be . she and her siblings have always gotten along , even though their parents never treated them all the same they were all able to see the struggle in how each one was treated and able to bond through their messy parent situation . as of now addison’s trying to play up a double life sort of situation . having fun + being the perfect daughter . she’s also on the path to becoming a big time lawyer . she’s in her 2L of law school at columbia + also works as a paid intern at the district attorney’s office .

* 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭�� !

addison has always been full of love and unlike her parents her love isn’t conditional maybe delusional sometimes but never conditional . don’t worry , after a nation wide search i’ve found the first girl who doesn’t suffer from resting bitch face . instead you’ll always see a smile on her face , to the point where if you ever see her not smiling be worried . something life shattering has happened . she’s the type to say she “ hates drama “ but perk up the minute she hears about drama going on in some else’s life . don’t worry though , after she done being nosy she’ll do all she can to help fix the issue even if you don’t want her too . hey , she may make things worse in the process but atleast she cares , right ? maybe not , i don’t know . incredibly loyal and loves to have a good laugh , she’s incredibly witty and a lover of corny jokes . very talkative . wants everyone to like her and if you don’t like her get ready for her to try at every chance to win you over . very much so the “ pardon me , but you really hurt my feelings “ type . she’s really just a soft , smart rich girl trying to navigate through this big world . also she falls in love quick , although she’d never had a real relationship . not because she’s a T H O T , she’s not , well , she doesn’t mean to be atleast . she just finds her befriending guys more than becoming their girlfriend . despite her naturally affectionate behavior , she just has this weird “ no boyfriend “ curse going on . maybe she’s pushing them away when things get close to serious in fear of losing the guy from her life . on a negative note , addisons hands down worst quality is her inability to control a situation she is incredibly reactive / volatile . she’ll easily fall into a screaming match or crying fit . never the type to walk away . a true virgo , y’all , the girl can and will argue until you’re blue in the face .

* 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 !

so basically , her dad is apart of the russian mafia . he was heavily involved while they lived in russia but when the government was catching onto his actions the family fled the country before they could dig any deeper into the case . he was supposed to cut ties when they moved to chicago but it was a way of life he simply couldn’t let go of . when addison’s mom found out she forced him out of their lives threatening to turn him in if he so much of looks at his children . despite this when addison and her mom moved to new york he reached out to addison . they’ve been meeting for lunch once a week for almost a year and a half behind her moms back . absolutely no one but those involved with the mafia know about her dad being within the mafia , which is exactly how he’s always wanted it , which is why her mom could never find out addison and he are continuing their relationship .

* 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬 !

full name : addison mikhailovna sani age : twenty - four date of birth : september 7th place of birth : saint petersburg , russia zodiac : virgo label : the facade pronouns : she/her gender : cisfemale orientation : bisexual , biromantic height : 5′8″ weight : 132 lbs ethnicity : nigerian , russian hometown : chicago , illinois occupation : law student , intern @ the district attorney’s office more : allergic to apples , hates takeout food , has an affinity for adult cartoons and stand up comedy, lives for alternative music , believes cuddling is a natural human interaction , loves video games , graduated valedictorian of her high school , loves painting .

* 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 !

soooo i know these are pretty basic but im just throwing things at the wall here and hoping they stick , okay ? im down for really anything so we can take inspo from these ideas ? expand more on them ? or just brainstorm something completely different ? whatever works ! , best friends , GIRL squad , drinking/party buddies , we’re just friend or at least that what we say but i always bring you as my date to big events type of deal , flirtationship , sibling like friendship , someone who has a crush on her , they don’t like her and she’s always trying to get them to change their mind , someone who tries to talk her into standing up to her mom , a confidant , someone she has a crush on , booty call maybe she initially wanted something serious from them but just fell into this booty call dynamic and she wont say anything otherwise because she likes having them around , someone she has a crush on , an ex friend who probably broke her trust .

#wealthyhq:intro #( 🍒 ) a look 𝓫𝓮𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓭 the mask — ooc #rehab tw

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suchagiantnerd · 5 years ago

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48 Books, 1 Year

I was just two books shy of my annual goal of 50! You can blame the combination of my adorable newborn, who refused to nap anywhere except on me, and Hallmark Christmas movie season, during which I abandon books for chaste kisses between 30-somethings who behave like tweens at places called the Mistletoe Inn (which are really in Almonte, Ontario).

Without further ado, as Zuma from Paw Patrol says, “Let’s dive in!”

1. Human Errors: A Panorama of Our Glitches, from Pointless Bones to Broken Genes / Nathan H. Lents

We have too many bones! We have to rely too much on our diet for survival! We suffer from too many cognitive biases! Reading about our design flaws was kind of interesting, but the best part of this book were the few pages toward the end about the possibility of alien life. Specifically this quote: "...some current estimates predict that the universe harbours around seventy-five million civilizations." WHAT?! This possibility more than anything else I've ever heard or read gives me a better idea of how infinite the universe really is.

2. The Fiery Cross / Diana Gabaldon

Compared to the first four books in the Outlander series, this fifth book is a real snooze. The characters are becoming more and more unlikeable. They're so self-centered and unaware of their privilege in the time and place they're living. Gabaldon's depictions of the Mohawk tribe and other First Nations characters (which I'm reading through her character's opinions of things) are pretty racist. The enslaved people at one character's plantation are also described as being well taken care of and I just.... can't. I think this is the end of my affair with Outlander.

3. Educated / Tara Westover

This memoir was a wild ride. Tara Westover grew up in a survivalist, ultra-religious family in rural Idaho. She didn’t go to school and was often mislead about the outside world by her father. She and her siblings were also routinely put in physical danger working in their father’s junkyard as their lives were “in god’s hands”, and when they were inevitably injured, they weren’t taken to the hospital or a doctor, but left to be treated by their healer mother. Thanks to her sheer intelligence and determination (and some support from her older brother), Tara goes to university and shares with us the culture shock of straddling two very different worlds. My non-fiction book club LOVED this read, we talked about it for a long, long time.

4. Imbolc: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for St. Brigid’s Day / Carl F. Neal

Continuing with my witchy education, I learned all about the first sabbat of the new year, Imbolc.

5. Super Sad True Love Story / Gary Shteyngart

This in-the-very-near-future dystopian novel got my heart racing during a few exciting moments, but overall, I couldn’t immerse myself fully because of the MISOGYNY. I think the author might not like women and the things women like (or the things he thinks they like?) In this near future, all the dudes are into finance or are media celeb wannabes, while all the women work in high-end retail. And onion-skin jeans are the new trend for women - they are essentially see-through. Gary….we don’t…want that? We don’t even want low-rise jeans to come back.

6. The Wanderers / Meg Howrey

Helen, Yoshi and Sergei are the three astronauts selected by a for-profit space exploration company to man the world’s first mission to Mars. But before they get the green light, they have to endure a 17-month simulation. In addition to getting insight into the simulation from all three astronauts via rotating narrators, we also hear from the astronauts’ family members and other employees monitoring the sim. At times tense, at times thoughtful, this book is an incisive read about what makes explorers willing to leave behind everything they love the most in the world.

7. Zone One / Colson Whitehead

The zombie apocalypse has already happened, and Mark is one of the survivors working to secure and clean up Zone One, an area of Manhattan. During his hours and hours of boring shifts populated by a few harrowing minutes here and there, the reader is privy to Mark’s memories of the apocalypse itself and how he eventually wound up on this work crew. Mark is a pretty likeable, yet average guy rather than the standard zombie genre heroes, and as a result, his experiences also feel like a more plausible reality than those of the genre.

8. Homegoing / Yaa Gyasi

One of my favourite reads of the year, this novel is the definition of “sweeping epic”. The story starts off with two half-sisters (who don’t even know about each other’s existence) living in 18th-century Ghana. One sister marries a white man and stays in Ghana, living a life of privilege, while the other is sold into slavery and taken to America on a slave ship. This gigantic split in the family tree kicks off two parallel and vastly different narratives spanning EIGHT generations, ending with two 20-somethings in the present day. I remain in awe of Gyasi’s talent, and was enthralled throughout the entire book.

9. Sweetbitter / Stephanie Danler

Tess moves to New York City right out of school (and seemingly has no ties to her previous life - this bothered me, I wanted to know more about her past) and immediately lands a job at a beloved (though a little tired) fancy restaurant. Seemingly loosely based on Danler’s own experiences as a server, I got a real feel for the insular, incestuous, chaotic life in “the industry”. Tess navigates tensions between the kitchen and the front of house, falls for the resident bad-boy bartender, and positions herself as the mentee of the older and more glamorous head server, who may not be everything she seems. This is a juicy coming-of-age novel.

10. The Autobiography of Gucci Mane / Gucci Mane and Neil Martinez-Belkin

Gucci Mane is one of Atlanta’s hottest musicians, having helped bring trap music to the mainstream. I’d never heard of him until I read this book because I’m white and old! But not knowing him didn’t make this read any less interesting. In between wild facts (if you don’t get your music into the Atlanta strip clubs, your music isn’t making it out of Atlanta) and wilder escapades (Gucci holing himself up in his studio, armed to the teeth, in a fit of paranoia one night) Gucci Mane paints on honest picture of a determined, talented artist fighting to break free of a cycle of systemic racism and poverty.

11. I’ll Be Gone in the Dark: One Woman’s Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer / Michelle McNamara

McNamara was a journalist and true crime enthusiast who took it upon herself to try and solve the mystery of the Golden State Killer’s identity. Amazingly, her interest in this case also sparked other people’s interest in looking back at it, eventually leading to the arrest of the killer (though tragically, McNamara died a few months before the arrest and would never know how her obsession helped to capture him). This is a modern true crime classic and a riveting read.

12. A Great Reckoning / Louise Penny

The 12th novel in Penny’s Inspector Gamache mystery series sees our hero starting a new job teaching cadets at Quebec’s police academy. Of course, someone is murdered, and Gamache and his team work to dig the rot out of the institution, uncovering a killer in the process.

13. Any Man / Amber Tamblyn

Yes, this novel is by THAT Amber Tamblyn, star of “The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants”! Anyway, this book is a tad bit darker, and follows five men who’ve been victimized by the female serial rapist, who calls herself Maude. Going into this read I though that it might be some sort of revenge fantasy, but dudes, not to worry - we really feel awful for the male victims and see them in all their complexity. Perhaps, if more men read this book, they might better understand the trauma female and non-binary victims go through? That would require men to read books by women though. Guys? GUYS???

14. Ostara: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for the Spring Equinox / Kerri Connor

Yet another witchy read providing more information about this Spring sabbat.

15. Scarborough / Catherine Hernandez

This novel takes place in OUR Scarborough! Following the lives of a number of residents (adults and children alike), the plot centres around the families attending an Ontario Early Years program as well as the program facilitator. Hernandez looks at the ways poverty, mental illness, addiction, race, and homophobia intersect within this very multicultural neighbourhood. It’s very sad, but there are also many sweet and caring moments between the children and within each of the families.

16. The Glitch / Elisabeth Cohen

Shelley Stone (kind of a fictional Sheryl Sandberg type) is the CEO of Conch, a successful Silicon Valley company. Like many of these over-the-top real-life tech execs, Shelley has a wild schedule full of business meetings, exercise, networking and parenting, leaving her almost no time to rest. While on an overseas business trip, she meets a younger woman also named Shelley Stone, who may or may not be her younger self. Is Shelley losing it? This is a dark comedy poking fun at tech start-up culture and the lie that we can have it all.

17. The Thirteenth Tale / Diane Setterfield

This is my kind of book! A young and inexperienced bookworm is handpicked to write the biography of an aging famous author, Vida Wynter. Summoned to her sprawling country home around Christmastime, the biographer is absolutely enthralled by Vida’s tales of a crumbling gothic estate and an eccentric family left too long to their own whims. Looking for a dark, twisty fairytale? This read’s for you.

18. Love & Misadventure / Lang Leav

Leav’s book of poems looked appealing, but for me, her collection fell short. I felt like I was reading a teenager’s poetry notebook (which I’m not criticizing, I love that teen girls write poetry, and surprise, surprise - so did I - but I’m too old for this kind of writing now).

19. Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows / Balli Kaur Jaswal

Hooo boy, my book club loved this one! Hoping to get a job more aligned with her literary interests, Nikki, the 20-something daughter of Indian immigrants to Britain, takes a job teaching writing at the community centre in London’s biggest Punjabi neighbourhood. The students are all older Punjabi women who don’t have much to do and because of their “widow” status have been somewhat sidelined within their community. Without anyone around to censor or judge them, the widows start sharing their own erotic fantasies with each other, each tale wilder than the last. As Nikki gets to know them better, she gains some direction in life and starts a romance of her own. (It should be noted that in addition to this lovely plot, there is a sub plot revolving around a possible honour killing in the community. For me, the juxtaposition of these two plots was odd, but not odd enough that it ruined the book.)

20. Beltane: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for May Day / Melanie Marquis

Beltane marks the start of the summer season in the witches’ year, and I learned all about how to ring it in, WITCH STYLE.

21. Summer of Salt / Katrina Leno

This book is essentially Practical Magic for teens, with a queer protagonist. All that to say, it’s enjoyable and sweet and a win for #RepresentationMatters, but it wasn’t a surprising or fresh story.

22. Too Like the Lightning / Ada Palmer

This is the first in the Terra Ignota quartet of novels, which is (I think) speculative fiction with maybe a touch of fantasy and a touch of sci-fi and a touch of theology and certainly a lot of philosophical ruminating too. I both really enjoyed it and felt so stupid while reading it. As a lifelong bookworm who doesn’t shy away from difficult reads, I almost never feel stupid while reading, but this book got me. The world building is next level and as soon as you think you’ve found your footing, Palmer pulls the rug out from under you and you’re left both stunned and excited about her latest plot twist. Interested in finding out what a future society grouped into ��nations’ by interests and passions (instead of geographical borders and ethnicity) might be like? Palmer takes a hearty stab at it here.

23. The Trauma Cleaner: One Woman’s Extraordinary Life in the Business of Death, Decay and Disaster / Sarah Krasnostein

When Sarah Krasnostein met Sandra Pankhurst, she knew she had to write her biography (or something like it - this book is part biography, part love letter, part reckoning). And rightly so, as Sandra has led quite a life. She grew up ostracized within her own home by her immediate family, married and had children very young, came out as a trans woman and begin living as her authentic self (but abandoning her own young family in the process), took to sex work and lived through a vicious assault, married again, and started up her own successful company cleaning uncleanable spaces - the apartments of hoarders, the houses of recluses, the condos in which people ended their own lives. Sandra is the definition of resilience, but all her traumas (both the things people have done to her and the things she’s done to others) have left their mark, as Krasnostein discovers as she delicately probes the recesses of Sandra’s brain.

24. Becoming / Michelle Obama

My favourite things about any memoir from an ultra-famous person are the random facts that surprise you along the way. In this book, it was learning that all American presidents travel with a supply of their blood type in the event of an assassination attempt. I mean OF COURSE they would, but that had never occurred to me. I also appreciated Michelle opening up about her fertility struggles, the difficult decision to put her career on hold to support Barack’s dreams, and the challenge of living in the spotlight with two young children that you hope to keep down to earth. Overall, I think Michelle was as candid as someone in her position can be at this point in her life.

25 and 26. Seven Surrenders, The Will to Battle / Ada Palmer

I decided to challenge myself and stick with Palmer’s challenging Terra Ignota series, also reading the second and third instalments (I think the fourth is due to be released this year). I don’t know what to say, other than the world-building continues to be incredible and this futuristic society is on the bring of something entirely new.

27. Even Vampires Get the Blues / Kate MacAlister

This novel wins for “cheesiest read of the year”. When a gorgeous half-elf detective (you read that right) meets a centuries-old sexy Scottish vampire, sparks fly! Oh yeah, and they’re looking for some ancient thing in between having sex.

28. A Case of Exploding Mangoes / Mohammed Hanif

A piece of historical fiction based on the real-life suspicious plane crash in 1988 that killed many of Pakistan’s top military brass, this novel lays out many possible culprits (including a crow that ate too many mangoes). It’s a dark comedy taking aim at the paranoia of dictators and the boredom and bureaucracy of the military (and Bin Laden makes a cameo at a party).

29. Salvage the Bones / Jesmyn Ward

This novel takes place in the steaming hot days before Hurricane Katrina hits the Mississippi coast. The air is still and stifling and Esch’s life in the small town of Bois Sauvage feels even more stifled. Esch is 14 and pregnant and hasn’t told anyone yet. Her father is a heavy drinker and her three brothers are busy with their own problems. But as the storm approaches, the family circles around each other in preparation for the storm. This is a jarring and moving read made more visceral by the fact that the author herself survived Katrina. It’s also an occasionally violent book, and there are particularly long passages about dog-fighting (a hobby of one of the brothers). The dog lovers in my book club found it hard to get through, consider this your warning!

30. Everything’s Trash, But It’s Okay / Phoebe Robinson

A collection of essays in the new style aka writing multiple pages on a topic as though you were texting your best friend about it (#ImFineWithThisNewStyleByTheWay #Accessible), Robinson discusses love, friendship, being a Black woman in Hollywood, being plus-ish-size in Hollywood, and Julia Roberts teaching her how to swim (and guys, Julia IS as nice in real life as we’d all hoped she was!) Who is Robinson? Comedy fans will likely know her already, but I only knew her as one of the stars of the Netflix film Ibiza (which I enjoyed). This is a fun, easy read!

31. Midsummer: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for Litha / Deborah Blake

After reading this book, I charged my crystals under the midsummer sun!

32. Fingersmith / Sarah Waters

So many twists! So many turns! So many hidden motives and long-held secrets! Think Oliver Twist meets Parasite meets Lost! (Full disclosure, I haven’t seen Parasite yet, I’m just going off all the chatter about it). Sue is a con artist orphan in old-timey London. When the mysterious “Gentleman” arrives at her makeshift family’s flat with a proposal for the con of all cons, Sue is quickly thrust into a role as the servant for another young woman, Maud, living alone with her eccentric uncle in a country estate. As Sue settles into her act, the lines between what she’s pretending at and what she’s really feeling start to blur, and nothing is quite what it seems. This book is JUICY!

33. Rest Play Grow: Making Sense of Preschoolers (Or Anyone Who Acts Like One) / Deborah MacNamara, PhD

I read approximately one parenting book a year, and this was this year’s winner. As my eldest approached her third birthday, we started seeing bigger and bigger emotions and I wasn’t sure how to handle them respectfully and gently. This book gave me a general roadmap for acknowledging her feelings, sitting through them with her, and the concept of “collecting” your child to prevent tantrums from happening or to help calm them down afterward. I’ll be using this approach for the next few years!

34. Lughnasadh: Rituals, Recipes and Lore for Lammas / Melanie Marquis

And with this read, I’ve now read about the entire witch’s year. SO MOTE IT BE.

35. In Cold Blood / Truman Capote

How had I not read this until now? This true-crime account that kicked off the modern genre was rich in detail, compassionate to the victims, and dug deep into the psyche of the killers. The descriptions of the midwest countryside and the changing seasons also reminded me of Keith Morrison’s voiceovers on Dateline. Is Capote his inspiration?

36. I’m Afraid of Men / Vivek Shraya

A quick, short set of musings from trans musician and writer Shraya still packs an emotional punch. She writes about love and loss, toxic masculinity, breaking free of gender norms, and what it’s like to exist as a trans woman.

37. The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You / Elaine N. Aron, PhD

Having long thought I might be a highly sensitive person (lots of us are!), I decided to learn more about how to better cope with stressful situations when I don’t have enough alone time or when things are too loud or when I get rattled by having too much to do any of the other myriad things that shift me into panic mode. Though some of the advice is a bit too new-agey for me (talking to your inner child, etc), some of it was practical and useful.

38. Swamplandia! / Karen Russell

The family-run alligator wrestling theme park, Swamplandia, is swimming in debt and about to close. The widowed father leaves the everglades for the mainland in a last-ditch attempt to drum up some money, leaving the three children to fend for themselves. A dark coming-of-age tale that blends magic realism, a ghost story, the absurd and a dangerous boat trip to the centre of the swamplands, this novel examines a fractured family mourning its matriarch in different ways.

39. A Mind Spread Out on the Ground / Alicia Elliott

This is a beautiful collection of personal essays brimming with vulnerability, passion, and fury. Elliott, the daughter of a Haudenosaunee father and a white mother, shares her experiences growing up poor in a family struggling with mental illness, addiction and racism. Topics touch on food scarcity, a never-ending battle with lice, parenthood and the importance of hearing from traditionally marginalized voices in literature.

40. Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay / Elena Ferrante

The third novel in Ferrante’s Neapolitan quartet sees Elena and Lila move from their early twenties into their thirties and deal with a riot of issues - growing careers, changing political beliefs, the challenges of motherhood and romantic relationships, and existing as strong-willed, intelligent women in 1960s and 70s Italy. I’ll definitely finish the series soon.

41. Half-Blood Blues / Esi Edugyan

A small group of American and German jazz musicians working on a record find themselves holed up in Paris as the Germans begin their occupation in WW2. Hiero, the youngest and most talented member of the group, goes out one morning for milk and is arrested by the Germans, never to be heard from again. Fifty years later, the surviving members of the band go to Berlin for the opening night of a documentary about the jazz scene from that era, and soon find themselves on a road trip through the European countryside to find out what really became of Hiero all those years ago. Edugyan’s novel is a piercing examination of jealousy, ambition, friendship, race and guilt. And features a cameo by Louis Armstrong!

42. A Serial Killer’s Daughter: My Story of Faith, Love and Overcoming / Kerri Rawson

So Brad and I had just finished watching season 2 of Mindhunter, and as I browse through a neighbourhood little library, I spot this book and the serial killer in question is the BTK Killer! Naturally, I had to read it. What I didn’t realize is that this is actually a Christian book, so Rawson does write a lot about struggling with her belief in God and finding her way back to Him, etc. But there are also chapters more fitting with the true crime and memoir genres that I equally enjoyed and was creeped out by.

43. The Night Ocean / Paul La Farge

This is another book that made me feel somewhat stupid as a reader. I just know there are details or tidbits that completely went over my head that would likely enrich a better reader’s experience. In broad strokes, the novel is about a failed marriage between a psychiatrist and a writer who became dangerously obsessed with H.P. Lovecraft and the rumours that swirled around him and his social circle. The writer’s obsession takes him away from his marriage and everything else, and eventually it looks like he ends his own life. The psychiatrist is doubtful (no body was found) and she starts to follow him down the same rabbit hole. At times tense, at times funny, at times sad, I enjoyed the supposed world of Lovecraft and his fans and peers, but again, I’m sure there are deeper musings here that I couldn’t reach.

44. Glass Houses / Louise Penny

The 13th novel in Penny’s Inspector Gamache mystery series sees our hero taking big risks to fight the opioid crisis in Quebec. He and his team focus on catching the big crime boss smuggling drugs across the border from Vermont, endangering his beloved town of Three Pines in the process.

45. The Bone Houses / Emily Lloyd-Jones

My Halloween read for the year, this dark fairytale of a YA novel was perfect for the season. Since her parents died, Ryn has taken over the family business - grave digging - to support herself and her siblings. As the gravedigger, she knows better than most that due to an old curse, the dead in the forest surrounding her village don’t always stay dead. But as more of the forest dead start appearing (and acting more violently than usual), Ryn and an unexpected companion (yes, a charming young man cause there’s got to be a romance!) travel to the heart of the forest to put a stop to the curse once and for all.

46. The Witches Are Coming / Lindy West

Another blazing hot set of essays from my favourite funny feminist take on Trump, abortion rights, #MeToo, and more importantly Adam Sandler and Dateline. As always, Lindy, please be my best friend?

47. Know My Name / Chanel Miller

This memoir is HEAVY but so, so needed. Recently, Chanel Miller decided to come forward publicly and share that she was the victim of Brock Turner’s sexual assault. She got the courage to do so after she posted her blistering and beautiful victim impact statement on social media and it went viral. Miller’s memoir is a must-read, highlighting the incredible and awful lengths victims have to go to to see any modicum of justice brought against their attackers. Miller dealt with professional ineptitude from police and legal professionals, victim-blaming, victim-shaming, depression and anxiety, the inability to hold down a job, and still managed to come out the other side of this trial intact. And in the midst of all the horror, she writes beautifully about her support system - her family, boyfriend and friends - and about the millions of strangers around the world who saw themselves in her experience.

48. Christmas Ghost Stories: A Collection of Winter Tales / Mark Onspaugh

Ghosts AND Christmas? Yes please! This quirky collection features a wide array of festively spooky tales. You want the ghost of Anne Boleyn trapped in a Christmas ornament? You got it! What about the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future drinking together in a bar? Yup, that’s here too!

So, what were my top picks of the year, the books that stuck with me the most? In no particular order:

Educated

Homegoing

The Wanderers

Know My Name

Scarborough

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