#based on a conversation

[logolepsy-babble]

Marlene: Guys. Guys. GUYS.

Remus: Fuck—Marlene it is four in the morning.

Marlene: I followed a girl because I thought she was pretty and then she followed me back. I’m shaking. Do I send her a dm and say “hi!” or is that too desperate? Am I desperate? Should I be silent? No talking at all, just silently crushing from afar.

James: No, saying hi is not too desperate.

Lily: You would know, wouldn’t you?

Mary: Does she fancy women?

Marlene: Uhhh… does she?

Sirius, taking a look at the girl’s account: She is not straight.

Remus: Just send the hi.

Marlene: Okay.

Marlene sends the text and closes out of the app.

Marlene: I did it. I’m going to go find a river and drown.

Peter: It’s too cold for that! Lay in the oven.

[starry-night333]

Will:*being tired as hell and stayed up all night working on stuff* father- father I don't wanna go to school tomorrow

Apollo(Lester, cus he got turned mortal again): well to bad you gotta, if I've gotta go I ain't goin alone-

Will:....welp- goodbye sleep schedule- hello coffee!

[gothofasaia]

Duke: i mean look at you! you’re funny, oddly charismatic and tall. You could have any guy you want. Please help me understand why you’re hung up on her still

Lenore: she has curly hair and nice tits do i need to say more?

[surelyimisheard]

yes this actually happened

[continuedparadox]

got bored at work. has this been done yet?

[finemeal]

BKDK Prompt #1

When Bakugou asked Deku to dinner, he thought it was just part of their friendship healing. The flower’s were a sweet touch, and the candle was typically for dates but he didn’t question it.

Deku probably should’ve caught onto something being odd when Bakugou started holding his hand, sweating nervously. Bur surely it was just Deku’s crush interpreting the situation weirdly, right?

Bakugou kissing him was also just platonic. He’s seen his other friends kiss platonically. Hell, his own friends have kissed him before! Usually on the cheek, but surely this was the same?

And becoming hero partners along with moving in together was just sensible! It was also cheaper to rent a one-bedroom versus a two-bedroom apartment.

Maybe Bakugou proposing after taking him on a day trip filled with all his favorite things should’ve clued him in. But he figured this was just Bakugou being logical. After all, married couples got a lot more benefits than single people. And after Bakugou scared Deku when he got injured, but Deku was unable to make any medical decisions for him, this must’ve been the easiest fix.

Adopting children with Bakugou felt like the next logical step. After all, since they were married this was the only way to have kids. Bakugou and Deku have always wanted kids, and friends have raised kids together before!

What Deku’s getting at, it’s not fully his fault for not noticing he and Bakugou were romantically involved! Bakugou never asked Deku to be his boyfriend!

[omni-present-god-send]

Based off a conversation between me and @grimfurbybitch

Enjoy

I can't write on this program lmao

[pitchperfect-lostgirl-rizzles]

The gang having a normal dinner at the hotel:

"Dad, can I have the salt?"

Lucifer and Alastor reach for it

"I'm her father, red idiot"

"Oh, are you now? Duck man?"

The two of them insult each other for twenty minutes and Charlie never gets her salt

[unknownchoatic]

Cross: What the past tense version of the word light? Like as in ‘to light something’

Killer: Oh, thats easy its ‘lighted’

Dust: No its ‘lited’

Horror: Wtf are you two talking about? the word you’re looking for is ‘lit’

[fullconcentratedpowerofthesun]

So... I may have done a thing.

@argetcross knows what I mean.

[magoranzz]

Magolor showing a painting: hey, do you think this looks alright? Taranza: yas 💅 Taranza: fuq, I meant it looks good 👍

[addendumbeekeeper]

God is a twelve year old girl who just discovered whump and I am her poor poor OC

[gothofasaia]

Ada: But you don’t get! he’s hot, tall, funny, my parents like him a lot and we look good together! what do you find wrong with him

Annabel: he’s a man.

[surelyimisheard]

who is drinking this???

[peace-and-light-poetry]

Cupcakes

"If you were given 12 cupcakes but 4 are poisoned, would you still eat them?"

She was using a metaphor To better explain a viewpoint

Not all of the cupcakes would be poisoned But she knew that 4 out of 12 is enough of them Enough of them

To make someone hesitate

No, she'd treat them all as dangerous Any rational person would, after all, Four times three equals 12

And who'd want to chance that?

She knew not all of them would hurt her But, however, she'd be damned if she took a chance No, she had to fixate

On how to best survive a scenario

Not all of them will hurt her But there's enough of them Who will pounce on her

Like a cat would do a mouse And she has no way of knowing which.

[21st-century-time-traveller]

Romantically and/or platonically depending on who you ask...

Sources

first: Jimmy @P0nyplanet

second: source