#because he is always afraid that happiness will leave. and that is something matt is eternally afraid of!

[thedevotionaltour]

i just think happy matt makes sense if you accept early volume 1 as part of who matt is too as a character because literally he is the denier and the represser even then. matt goes that isn't affecting me at all and then carries his misery with him while pretending things are in fact dandy. and then also allows himself to be so mega moody and sad to be around depending on the day but like i do consider that as part of who matt is. stupid as it sounds i do think it makes sense if you allow those early comics people love to hate on because they're "too silly" as valid parts of his character. i think that choice makes a lot more sense then. because again. even in his very silly campy 60s comic time he is literally still the funny and moody represser and anguisher just in a different way. but like i don't know he's still a cunt there who sucks. did you not witness his crazy moping. i did.

[sparklyskies0]

𝙙𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙛𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧 ౨ৎ m.s

pairings: badboy!bf!matt x goodgirl!virgin!reader

( 𝙞𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 ) you and matt have been seeing each other for some time now. your parents don’t approve of him but you couldn’t care less─that’s the whole point, to prove that you’re no longer the little girl that follows the rules despite how it makes her feel. When your parents are away for the weekend, you invite matt over. Finally deciding to take the next step and give yourself to him completely.

warnings/disclaimers: smut, unprotected sex, virginity loss, mentions pain, fingering, oral sex (fem receiving), nsfw..

As you awaited matt’s arrival, you paced around your dimly lit room. The smell of your vanilla scented candle filling the air. You fiddled with your fingers; you were nervous. Matt has came over countless of times, behind your parents back of course. And you were never as anxious as you are now. Because you knew, how this night was going to end. Both of you, tangled in your satin bedsheets, your naked form against his. You knew you were going to finally lose your virginity. Give him all of you.

Your relationship with matt has been going on for a couple months now. Behind your parents back and even sometimes in their face. They don't like matt at all, he's exactly the kind of guy they had warned you to stay away from. They have expectations for you, they want you to become a lawyer to follow in your mothers footsteps, marry a man they think is perfect for you and basically be unhappy. Being with a guy like matt, would simply wound that perfect life your parents want you to have. Your whole childhood was dedicated to making them happy; skipping your dance classes, which you desperately wanted to go to for those stupid dinners with their rich friends who did nothing but brag about how smart and capable their kids were, getting straight A's instead of playing outside at the park with the other kids. You were always afraid of getting dirty because your parents made you. You weren't allowed thrill or excitement. Because clean, perfect good girls who are going to law school don't get dirty, ever.

Matt was the bad boy. the whole school knew about his record and the amount of girls he slept with. He had tattoos and a motorcycle and never went to class or followed any rules whatsoever. Girls want to be with him and guys are afraid to cross him. You never wanted to speak to him ever, he was far too intimidating. But that's exactly why you wanted him so bad. He's the complete opposite of you, his world doesn't, shouldn't align with yours. Your parents freaked when you brought him home and you loved it.

After a couple minutes you were snapped out of your worried thoughts by a knock at your window. you turned around, meeting him. He crouched down outside of the dormer window. A sly smirk on his face. A wide grin plasters on your face as you walk towards the window, pulling it up and open. As soon as he fully sets inside he didn't hesitate to wrap his arms around your waist pulling you closer towards him.

You squeal at his action. Your arms wrapping around his neck. "why'd you come through the window? i unlocked the front door for you, y'know" you look at him.

"where's the fun in that?" he responds, causing a soft giggle to leave your lips. Your eyes glued to his, occasionally roaming over his features, which is something you do a lot.

His blue eyes that are sparkling in the dim room mixed with the soft moonlight blaring through the window. His soft pale skin, pinkish lips, long perfect nose. You were honestly obsessed. You could stare at him all day.

When people look at him, they see a boy with a bad reputation. drugs, motorcycles, tattoos and fighting, someone who's going nowhere in life. But you don't, you see an actually sweet (when he wants to be) guy, who's trying but also can't help but rebel against everyone's wishes. They believe he's bad news, so he's giving them bad news.

You're almost starting to believe that you're in love with him. you know you are. But you won't tell him that, at least not yet. But you trust him so much, with everything. You know you're ready, ready to take all of him in every way.

Youve seen him naked before, and you know how big he is. Which is why your hearts beating so fast out of your chest right now. "what're we doin tonight, doll? a movie?, please don't say baking cus i don't think I'm mentally prepared for that this time" he says.. The last time you forced him to bake with you ending up with him burning his hand and a mediocre cake. You don't show it but your heart kind of flutters at the fact he didn't mention anything sexual despite the countless times he fingered you and ate you out, he doesn't expect it to happen all the time. But he didn't know that none of the things he listed were on your agenda for tonight.

you tilt your head slightly, "actually, i was thinking..." you trail off, hoping he can answer for you. his face changes, the smirk on his face growing wider. You feel him tug you closer. "oh.. i see" he brings his head down to your neck, placing a soft kiss to the flesh. His lips continue to pepper kisses all over your neck, and collarbone. your head falls back slightly, biting your lip.

a soft hum escapes your lips as you bring your hands to cup his face, bringing him to look at you. his eyes already filled with desire. "i think I'm ready" you state

you watch his face contort in confusion, instead of elaborating further you press his lips against yours. His breath hitches into the kiss, a deep sigh escaping both of you.

you back him up, towards your bed. When the back of his legs hit the furniture, he falls down onto it. The kiss yet to be broken. You climb on top of him. You're not quite sure where this confidence is coming from, but you like it. It's perfect to have, especially for tonight. Your thighs straddle his sides, you break the kiss, your lips leaving trails over his jaw and neck. His hands grip your waist, loving whatever has gotten into you. He didn't know yet that it was going to be him.

You grind yourself onto him, moaning softly. He lets out a few low groans himself. "i want you inside of me.." you whisper moaned by his ear, your hot breath sending shivers down his spine. Once he registered your words, his grip on your hips got tighter. you continued to kiss his jaw, about to make your way to his lips when he stops you. "wait-what?" he speaks. You lift your head, looking at him.

you bite your lip. "ive been thinking..and i, i want you to fuck me. Like for real this time" you say. "im ready"

Matt's face softens. he lets out a soft sigh. "You think you're ready or are you actually ready?" he asks, with genuine concern

You nod "i am ready. i swear... i want you. i...i trust you" you say softly, you mean every word. He lets out another soft sigh. "i don't wanna force you to do anything, you don't have to do this..we can keep doin what we always do" he says. He's deep-down terrified right now, he doesn't want to say or do the wrong thing, he doesn't want to scare you or make you regret it. You two always just stuck to oral. he knew you were inexperienced, and you were pretty open about being a virgin and wanting to trust someone enough. He's never pressured you, he wants you to be as comfortable as possible, no matter what.

"matt i promise, i want to" you cup his face. your eyes glued to his. he was finally convinced. licking his lips he speaks, "well in that case.." he sits up, flipping you over so now he's hovered over you.

he looks down at you, the way your eyes glisten, the way your chest rises and falls. By the look on your face, he can tell how ready you were, and that only egged him on.

His head dropped down to your exposed neck, trailing hot wet kisses down to your collarbone, then to the top of your chest. You let out soft moans at the way his mouth worships your body, the way his kisses are gentle yet hungry. He kisses down to the middle of your stomach. When he stops, he looks up at you. "take this off for me, doll" his voice hoarse. He tugs at the bottom of your tank top, you bite your lip as you look down at him.

You arch your back to assist him in removing the tiny top. He lifts it up, revealing your breasts, perky and perfect.. for him. The sight made him moan "so beautiful" he doesn't hesitate to bring his head back up to latch onto the flesh. A sharp moan escapes your mouth. His tongue circling around your hard nipple. he trails a couple kisses in between your breasts licking along your skin. It doesn't take long for him to give your other breast some attention as well. He trailed his mouth down to your lower stomach, stopping at the top of your pajama shorts. he looks up at you, a grin growing on his face. "this is about you doll, all you" his voice low in a mumble. His fingers hook your bottoms. bringing them down slowly, your white lace panties revealed to him. You squirm slightly, your teeth tugging on your bottom lip as he works.

Once your shorts were brought down to your ankles you kick them off. Matt places kisses up your thighs, his hands spreading your legs apart. after your legs are as open as he wants them to be he stands up. "take those off." he says his head nodding to the clothing that's blocking what he considers heaven. You obey, removing them from your body. While you do that, matt pulls his shirt over his head, discarding it somewhere in the room. He's now shirtless in front of you. "get yourself nice and wet for me, doll" he says, his hands coming down to unbuckle and tug his pants along with his underwear down.

You take your fingers into your mouth, getting your index and middle finger wet, bringing them down to your already dripping core.. wetting the flesh more. You run your fingers along your folds, moaning at how his cock springs out when his pants fall down to his ankles.

He strokes himself, the precum visible on his pink aroused tip. he makes his way back to you. "im gonna stretch you out with my fingers first okay?" he says softly. You nod, your eyes on him. He's fingered you before, but this time it feels far more different.

He settles himself between your legs again. wetting his fingers with his mouth before bringing them across your slimy folds. You moan at his fingers, your hips rolling against them naturally. He eases his fingers into you, causing you to hiss slightly.

He continues to push his fingers inside you, stretching you out. You moan at the feeling. As soon as you adjusted his fingers curled and he began to finger fuck your tight cunt.

"mm fuck" you moan, your body arching up. "yea baby, y'like that?" he murmurs, his fingers keeping up his torturous pace. Your moaning becomes more louder, and struggled as you feel the pit in your stomach grow. "mm shit just imagine how you'll sound with my cock inside you"

His fingers pick up. Your orgasm crashes over you, you let out a loud strong moan as you release over his fingers. "mm..thats my girl" he hums, his fingers still pumping inside you slowly, riding out your high. Once his fingers leave your core he brings them to his mouth, soaking up your juices and licking his fingers clean. He brings his head back down to your center, his tongue comes out to taste you. Dragging in between your folds, sucking up the rest of your juices and wetness. After he licks you clean he leaves a kiss to your pretty pussy.

He comes up, hovering over you once again. "you ready doll?" he asks, his eyes scanning for any doubt, wanting this to be just as real and perfect for you than him. When you nod, your eyes looking up at him, almost pleading for him; he knew.

"okay, its gonna hurt, but only for a second...tell me if its too much and we'll stop" he speaks. letting out a nervous sigh. "hold onto me baby"

You bring your arms up to wrap around his neck, pulling him down closer to you. He kisses you gently, yet passionately. He was waiting for this moment, and so were you.

As he kisses you, his hand grips your leg, lifting it up more, he does the same to your other one. He's settled deeply in between you now.

His hand latches onto his member, lining it with your entrance. His tip rubbing teasingly against your wet glistening folds. He places multiple kisses along your cheek and jaw before attaching your lips back together. Wanting to be able to swallow the sounds of your pain for you as he slips in.

He slowly pushes himself inside of you, his thick member barely in yet you still broke the kiss with your hiss of pain. "shh shh i know doll i know" he comforts against your lips. continuing to kiss you

"just relax.. i got you, m' right here"

he continues to push himself inside you, your moans of pain honestly breaking his heart. But this is what you wanted, and he knew it will subside eventually.

Once he was fully in. he stayed still, wanting to give you time to adjust to him. "its okay, you okay?" he lifts his head up to look at you. His thumb coming to wipe away the tears at the corner of your beautiful eyes. "i-it just hurts..im okay though" you admit.

Matt nods understandably, "we can stop if you want" He gently caresses your face

You shake your head, "no...no i want this" you say

you suddenly feel the pain that was once invading you slip away. You had adjusted to him, to his size, to the feeling of his cock buried deep inside you. "you can move.." you speak

And with that, he thrusts into you slowly. You let out a soft sigh, the pleasure slowly creeping back into you.

"you feel so good babydoll" he hums, the feeling of you clenching around him. So innocent, and so his.

"mm matt" you moan, as he thrusts his cock into you at a slow sensual pace. "it feel good, doll? my cock deep inside you...is this what you wanted?" his voice low

You nails dig into the back of his neck as you hold onto him. The pleasure, the feeling of his thick cock stretching you out too good to bare.

Your moans were like music to his ears, giving him the permission and encouragement he needed to increase his movements and move into you faster. "o-oh fuck" your mouth opens wide. His hand reaches for your thigh, lifting it up more for him to fuck you deeper.

He continously hits a certain spot inside you that has you squirming underneath him. "mm just like that doll, your s'good" he moans

"tell me how it feels baby...how does my cock feel inside you"

"fuck matt, it feels s'good.." you moan. you pull his face closer, nipping on his shoulder to silence yourself. "mm fuck dont do that baby," his hand cups the side of your face "i wanna hear you..hear how good im making you feel" he looks you in your eye.

His pace quickens, wanting to bring you to the edge. He can feel it, with the way you clench around him, the squelching sounds being the tell of how wet and close you are.

"i want you to cum doll, cum on my cock please" he pleads

your eyes squeeze closed as you feel a pit in your stomach, you've felt them before.. but this one feels stronger. his cock so deep inside you making you feel things that were far more foreign to you before.

"no no no, open your eyes f'me doll. let me see you" he groans. you open your eyes, meeting his lusty half lidded bedroom eyes. "look at me while you cum on my cock"

He continued to thrust into you deeply, your legs trembling from the sensations. His hands let go of your sides, coming to find yours from around his neck. He intertwined your fingers, holding both your hands. He brought them to both sides of you. Holding them tightly, not wanting to let go. Pinning your hands down he smashes his lips against yours. His hips moving at rapid speed, slamming into you.

You squeeze his hands, your moans muffled and uncontrolled as he swallows them.

You break the kiss moaning loudly, your breath shaking and uncontrolled "ah.. ah fuck im cumming!" you announce. that only made matt let out a gutteral groan and fuck into you faster.

"shh.. yeah thats it baby..come on doll" He encourages, kissing your neck, leaving bites and marks. You moan loudly, your body shuddering as you cum.

Matt immediately takes you into a kiss, swallowing up your beautiful sounds. He was right behind you, one single thrust and he stilled inside you. The feeling of his thick warm load shooting inside you. You could barely keep your eyes open. Trembling from your release, and still feeling matt fuck his cum into you. Riding out both of your highs.

His face buried into your neck, his own body shuddering against you. "you did so good doll...my good girl" He places wet kisses to your flesh.

He waits a moment for you to calm down, before slipping out of you. You gasp at his action. your body jolting up. Matt winces for you, "i know, m'sorry" he apologizes knowing how sensitive you must be

He collapses next to you. you turn on your side facing him, your head resting on your hands. He leans over, placing a soft kiss to your bare shoulder. "you okay?" He asks. His voice filled with genuine concern.

You nod "yeah, I'm okay..im happy" you answer, the corners of your mouth curing slightly

"good." he says, relief taking over him. "was it..how you imagined?" he asks, needing to know if there's a chance of regret.

"Better." you smile.

He returns a smile back, his hands trailing the curves of your side. "c'mon, lets get you cleaned up"

ᥫ᭡ Authors Note

this is so long lmfaoa

obsessed with matt as a bad boy

[hannahsturniolo]

ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴇᴡ

Summary: Chris is in love with you, but before he can admit it, you start seeing someone else, and Chris falls apart. (Happy ending😉)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

You and Chris had always been really good friends. He was the person you turned to for dating advice, or when you just needed to vent about some guy who let you down. What you didn’t know was that Chris had always had a quiet crush on you, one he kept to himself.

Every time you talked about someone new or went out on another date, it stung a little more for him. Still, he stayed by your side, always listening, always there.

And the truth is, deep down, you loved Chris too, you just didn’t realize it, or maybe you were both too scared to admit it. So the feelings stayed unspoken.

While you were out there trying to find your soulmate, Chris hadn’t been dating anyone. Because for him, it was always you.

Chris always told himself he’d wait for the perfect moment to tell you how he felt. He wanted it to be right, something meaningful. But deep down, he was scared. Scared that if he said the words out loud, everything between you would change. So he stayed quiet, holding it all in, afraid to risk the friendship he valued more than anything.

You were getting ready for a date with a guy you really liked, the kind where your heart races a little just thinking about him. He’d told you earlier that night he was planning to ask you to be his girlfriend, that he saw a future with you. You were excited, nervous, and full of butterflies.

That’s when Chris showed up, just to check in on you, like he always did. You told him, beaming, that this guy was going to ask you out officially. That he might be your boyfriend by the end of the night.

Chris’s smile didn’t fully drop, but something shifted. His eyes dulled just a bit, and his voice softened. His heart stopped in that moment, but he still treated you with kindness. He was never, ever mean to you. He just, wasn’t the same. His mood changed, even though he tried to hide it. And you noticed. You felt it.

You tried to brush it off, maybe he was just dealing with something personal, something he didn’t feel like talking about. You didn’t want to push him, but the change in his mood sat heavy in the room. So you asked him what was wrong.

He just shook his head and smiled softly, saying it was nothing. That he hoped you had an amazing date.

But he didn’t hug you before he left like he usually did. No playful squeeze, no comforting arms around you. He just walked to the door, said goodbye, and left.

You stood there for a moment, confused. Wondering if you’d said something wrong. If maybe you’d upset him without realizing it.

You had no idea that deep down, Chris wasn’t just acting strange, he was hurting. Jealous. Wishing it was him you were getting ready for, not someone else. Wishing you had chosen him instead.

You went out on your date, and by the end of the night, it was official. You and that guy were a couple. You were excited, so the first person you wanted to tell was Chris. You texted him, “We’re official!”

But, no reply.

That’s when the worry started creeping in. It wasn’t like him to leave you on read. So after you got home, you called him.

Still nothing.

You couldn’t shake the feeling, so you decided to walk over to the Sturniolo house. he lived close, and maybe something was up.

When you knocked, Nick answered the door. You didn’t want to seem rude barging in asking for Chris, so you sat down and chatted with Nick and Matt for a bit. But the energy in the room was off. Quiet. Heavy.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. You asked, “What’s wrong? You guys have all been so quiet lately.”

Matt looked around, hesitating, before leaning in closer. His voice dropped to a whisper.

“Don’t tell anyone I said this, but Chris is upset. Because he likes you.”

Your heart sank. Your stomach twisted. It felt like the air had been knocked out of you.

You wanted to cry.

Because the truth was, you felt the same way about Chris. You always had. But now, you had a boyfriend. And everything suddenly felt so complicated.

You sat there, completely speechless. All you could think was: Why didn’t he tell me sooner?This could’ve been him. We could’ve been something.

Now, all you felt was confusion, torn between what you had, and what you could’ve had. Because you liked Chris. So much. Maybe even more than you ever let yourself realize.

And now, you didn’t know what to do.

Nick told you Chris was in his room. You got up, your heart pounding as you made your way down the hallway. When you reached his door, you paused, your hand hovering for a second, before knocking softly.

You barely got the chance to knock twice before you heard Chris’s voice through the door, low and annoyed:

“What?”

You leaned in closer and said gently, “It’s me.”

Silence.

Then the door slowly creaked open.

And there he was.

Chris’s eyes met yours, and your heart broke on the spot. His eyes were puffy, red around the edges. You could tell he had been crying, even if he tried to hide it. It looked like he had wiped away the tears quickly, hoping no one would notice.

You didn’t say a word. You just stepped forward and pulled him into a hug, your arms wrapping tightly around him. He didn’t resist.

You reached behind you to close the door, still holding him.

When you finally pulled back, you looked up into his face, so close now, and asked softly, eyes full of worry,

“What’s going on, Chris?”

Chris let out a deep sigh as the two of you walked over to his bed and sat down. The silence between you felt heavy, like neither of you knew where to start.

Finally, you broke it.

“Matt told me what’s going on.”

Chris let out a groan under his breath, mumbling,“Ugh, of course Matt did. Idiot.”

You looked at him, voice soft but serious.

“Chris, if you would’ve told me earlier, I’d be with you right now.”

His head snapped toward you. His heart felt like it skipped a beat.

“What do you mean?” he asked, staring at you.

You hesitated, cheeks flushing, eyes dropping for a second before meeting his again.

“I’ve liked you this whole time, Chris. I just, I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. I had no idea you felt the same.”

He looked at you, eyes wide, like everything he ever wanted to hear had just been spoken out loud.

Then, with a quiet breath, he said,

“I’m sorry. I thought you knew.”

You looked at Chris, your voice trembling as you said,

“I had no idea how you felt…”

The weight of everything hit you all at once, and before you could stop it, the tears started to fall. You tried to hold them back, but it was no use. You just sat there, crying, confused, overwhelmed, heart aching.

Chris froze for a second, not knowing what to say. So he did the only thing he could, he pulled you into his arms and held you tightly, letting you cry against his chest.

Trying to lighten the mood, he let out a soft, nervous chuckle and said,

“Well, I mean, it’s not too late.”

You let out a teary giggle, wiping your eyes.

“How am I supposed to break up with someone I started dating a few hours ago?” you asked, half laughing, half crying.

“And how am I supposed to tell him I’m in love with my best friend?”

Chris’s arms loosened slightly as he pulled back just enough to look at you. His eyes searched yours, softer than you’d ever seen them.

“You’re in love with me?” he asked, almost in a whisper.

You looked down shyly, your voice barely above a breath.

“Yeah…”

He looked at you, eyes full of something deeper than words could capture, and whispered,

“Me too.”

A gentle smile tugged at his lips, the kind that made your chest ache in the best way.

You gave a small, helpless shrug, your voice barely above a whisper.

“I wish I could kiss you, but that would technically be cheating.”

Chris didn’t say a word.

Instead, he reached up and gently cupped the side of your face, his thumb brushing your cheek. His touch was warm, grounding, but everything about this moment felt electric.

He looked at you like he didn’t care about the technicalities, like the truth between you both mattered more than anything else.

Then he leaned in, and kissed you, soft, deep, and full of everything you’d both been holding back for so long. Your heart fluttered wildly in your chest, and for a second, nothing else in the world existed.

Just you and Chris.

Chris pulled away from the kiss, a breathless laugh escaping his lips as he looked at you.

“Well…” he grinned,

“Text him right now. Break up with him.”

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Taglist❤︎:

@courta13 @riggysworld @heartsonlyforchris @mattssidepiece @matthewsangel @whore4chris @mattsturniolofuckingsexy @sturkneeohloww @leila-marie4 @sturniolo-szn2 @tezzzzzzzz @fictionalboysstuff @sturnixblogger @vall67 @chrissbxby @sturniolobananas1 @sophand4n4 @stvvrn1olo @xxxxxxlovesstuff @mattspillowprincess @moond0llie @emely9274 @briizysturn @sturniolooluvv @kenziesturniolo54 @d0llworld @kalel2005 @yourfavejules @rheaasturn

[liiixsturniolos]

" A letter I wish I'd sent. " M.S

angst/fluff MATT STURNIOLO wc:764

| It had been a year now. Since you and Matt had ended things. Well, really, since Matt had ended things...

The night in the car when he'd broken up with you had washed and cascaded through your mind for months like a traumatic wave, coming back to haunt you and tease your brain. The memory of the pouring rain, Matts trembling voice and the tears which then streamed down your face as he told you the news.

A year. A whole year you'd gone without Matt, the man who used to dance with you at 3am, the man who used to push strands of your hair behind your ear when he'd kiss you, the man who used to write you letters about the way you looked, your 'angelic' voice and the adorable way you laughed.

Three hundred and sixty-five days without the man who you had sworn you would be with for the rest of your life. You don't even know how you got through it, it was a hazy year. Your friends helped you get back on your feet. You got a new apartment and focused more on your work. Over the year your wound healed up, and your undying love for Matt, died a little, and faded away, but you would still kill to see his face one more time, to kiss him one more time, that's all you wanted.

You hadn't found anyone new yet, you were just living contentedly. Alone, but peacefully, and sort of happy.

Your new job would bring you to New York. A place you were fond of and excited to go to. Packing your bags of course was a chore you'd put off until the day you had to leave for the airport.

It wasn't convenient but when the morning came you rummaged around your apartment searching for all of the things you had to bring.

Your eyes land on your book collection. Very dear to you, poetry books and romantic stories you knew you'd need to take. Your mind wanders as you flick through the pages of an old poetry book, then pick up another and do the same.

Your eyes halt to a sudden stop when you see a foreign piece of paper lodged into the page of a book.

On page number 58, a neatly folded, lined piece of paper read..

Dear y/n, I hope that whenever you read this, you're well. I hope that you've moved. I hope you're living out in a big city as you've always dreamed of. I hope that whoever you have found now treats you kindly and appreciates your melodic laugh and the intoxicating colour of your deep brown eyes. I hope that whoever you're with now knows that they have the most beautiful, smart, and funny girl to exist. Not everyone who walks into your life will be meant to stay, I certainly wasn't. I wasn't a good enough man for you. I got angry fast, and I hate myself for it. It's a weird feeling having to go from holding your head on my chest every night, and your face nuzzled into the nape of my neck to staring at the blank ceiling of what used to be our bedroom without you here. I can't sleep without you. You were the first person I ever loved Y/n. You will always be the only person I've ever loved. With every bone in my body I wanted to devote my life to you, to grow old with you and only you until my deathbed. You drew memories in my mind I could never erase, you painted colours in my heart I can never replace. I'm afraid I will never be good enough for someone like you, I loved everything about you and maybe that was my fault. You gave me something I had never had before, I found rest in your arms and peace when I looked at your face. I know that I will love you forever y/n. So whenever you read this, tommorow or in years I hope you don't love me back, because I could never deserve someone like you. Tommorow you will come to pick up your things from my house. The house that used to be ours. You'll hate me for a while and I know it. That's why I'm writing this to you. To slip it into our favourite poetry book that I read to you, when I stroke your cheek with my free hand and your eyes flutter asleep. I love you. I'll love you forever and that's my fault.

hey! I hope you liked this tysm for reading, please interact if you enjoyed!! part 2 maybe? [not proofread]

taglist hoes!: @matthewsroses @chrislilcumslvt @pvssychicken @ivysturnss @mattsbitchh @sturniolo-fann @matts-myloverboy @emely9274 @sophand4n4 @uncannyguava @chrissweetheart @certifiedstarrr @slut4chris888

[klaudiaxsturniolo]

Almost Was..

series masterlist:

summary: you and Matt have been best friends since you were born, he always had feelings for you but never told you because he was scared of losing you, until you both got paired for a group project and he was going to confess to you at a party but then he sees you kissing someone else.. what happens then..?

warnings:: mention of drinking, kissing , bit of angst, emotional. no happy ending, yet. lmk if I missed something!

Matt stood on the edge of the backyard, the party buzzing around him — red solo cups scattered across the grass, someone’s playlist thumping through cheap speakers, laughter echoing under strings of fairy lights. But all he could see was you — across the yard, in the center of the crowd, laughing. And then, suddenly, kissing someone else.

His heart dropped in a way he didn’t think was even possible.

He felt Nick beside him before he heard him.

“You good?” Nick asked quietly, nudging him with his elbow.

Matt didn’t answer. His chest burned.

*2 weeks before*

You were sprawled out on Matt’s bedroom floor, feet tangled in a throw blanket, flipping through pages of your shared history project.

“This thing is so boring,” you groaned, tossing your pen on the floor. “We should just make up everything and hope our teacher doesn’t check.”

Matt smirked, sitting cross-legged beside you. “That sounds like something Chris would do, not you.”

“Yeah, well, maybe Chris is onto something,” you teased, nudging his shoulder.

He laughed, but it caught a little in his throat. You were close — your knees brushing, your eyes bright, your smile soft. He wanted to say something right then. Anything. But the words stuck to the back of his throat like they were afraid to come out.

*back at the party*

Matt blinked hard, trying to pull his eyes away from you — your hands resting easily on the stranger’s chest, your smile pressed against their lips. He turned sharply and walked into the house, weaving through people, not really knowing where he was going.

He ended up in the kitchen, gripping the counter like it was the only thing keeping him upright.

Chris found him minutes later.

“Dude,” he said softly. “I saw.”

Matt let out a shaky breath, his jaw clenched.

“I was gonna tell her tonight,” he admitted. “I had it all planned out.”

Chris didn’t say “I told you so,” even though he’d said it a thousand times before. He just rested a hand on Matt’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry, man.”

*A week before the party.*

A week before the party, you and Matt were sitting in the back of his car. The project was done, but neither of you went inside. The streetlight outside his house flickered overhead, washing everything in pale gold.

“I’m kinda gonna miss this,” you said suddenly.

Matt looked over. “What? My car?”

You rolled your eyes. “No, idiot. Us. Spending time like this. It feels… easy.”

Matt swallowed. “It is easy.”

You looked at him then — really looked at him. His heart stuttered. There was something unspoken in the air between you, something fragile and real. You could feel it too.

But before either of you said another word, your phone buzzed, and you glanced away.

The moment passed.

*Back at the party*

You found him on the porch later that night. The air was cooler, quieter. Matt didn’t look at you right away — he was staring out at the street, jaw tight, arms crossed over his chest.

“Hey,” you said softly, stepping beside him.

“Hey,” he muttered back.

“I didn’t know you were here.”

“Yeah. Doesn’t matter.”

There was a beat of silence.

You looked down. “You okay?”

He turned toward you then, finally. His eyes were sharp, but there was something tired in them. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

You blinked, caught off guard. “I… I saw you leave. I just wanted to check—”

Matt let out a dry laugh. “You kissed someone ten minutes after walking in and now you’re worried about me?”

You recoiled a little, his words cutting deeper than you expected. “Matt, I didn’t know—”

“Exactly,” he snapped. “You didn’t know. You never knew.”

The porch fell silent. Even the music from inside felt distant now.

He ran a hand through his hair, breathing heavy. “You wanna know something messed up? I was gonna tell you tonight. I’ve been waiting to tell you. For years.”

You stared at him, eyes wide.

“But I waited too long,” he muttered. “And that’s on me.”

You stepped closer. “Matt…”

He shook his head. “It’s fine. Really. I just— I needed to say it. Finally.”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“Because I was afraid,” he admitted, voice cracking. “Afraid of losing you. Afraid you didn’t feel the same. I thought if I waited long enough, maybe the right moment would come.”

You didn’t know what to say. The guilt hit you like a wave.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” you whispered.

He gave a bitter smile. “I know. That’s the worst part.”

Later that night...

Nick sat beside Matt on the hood of the car, neither of them saying much. The sky stretched out above them, full of stars they couldn’t name.

“You think she knew?” Matt asked finally.

Nick sighed. “I think she felt something. But people run from things that feel too big. You’re not the only one who’s scared, you know.”

Matt nodded, eyes fixed on the road ahead. “Yeah. Just wish I hadn’t waited until it was too late.”

Nick didn’t answer. Because sometimes, there’s nothing to say.

---

To be continued…?

a/n - this is my first ever story I wrote! I really enjoyed making it and pls be nice! should I make a part 2??

[usuallyrated2stars]

It's a Doey world and we're all just living in it (compilation of me trying to figure out how to draw him, from most recent to least recent)

The reason why these two are flipped around is beyond me. Wtf go back

Headcanons I have are under the cut, if you'd like to read (:<

Okay, so, these are divided between the "yippee most toys survive and make a community outside in the wilderness or something!" au, and canon

AU:

No one at the community is struggling in any massive way, nor is there any threat of danger or starvation, so Doey feels like a tool that is going unused

Matthew is struggling with this the most because he's so used to helping everyone all the time and feeling useful through service to others (picture Steven Universe Future) so when people DON'T need him to fix something, he feels terribly useless and insignificant

Kevin had to shove both Matt and Jack down just to survive a Prototype encounter, which made them both feel like they were just in the way

Jack and Kevin also feel the emptiness of peacefulness, but to a slightly lesser extent than Matt

Doey compensates for the lack of his usual roles (hunter and gatherer, leader, protector) by doing a LOT of chores. This is fine given that he was made for fulfilling multiple tasks at once, but Doey pushes himself way too far

He doesn't eat unless he has to (physical limitations or peer pressure) because he struggles a bit with trusting food since he didn't need to kill or risk his life for it (sus) and a part of him feels like he doesn't deserve it

Very stressed in general

Loves hanging out with Kissy! She is an awesome listener and lets Doey rant about silly stuff, all the while nodding attentively. It makes him feel valued, even if he isn't saying anything important

Got dangerously close to getting Poppy's ass and beating her to death after the Safe Haven got destroyed (luckily there were survivors and other non-feral toys around the factory, no all hope was not lost). It took the combined efforts of Kissy, Poppy, the player, and a few survivors to convince Doey that he shouldn't shatter her yet

Fully believes he doesn't need Poppy anymore as he ran Safe Haven successfully be himself, and still holds resentment for her to this day

Canon:

While one dough boy is operating Doey, the other two can still say their piece in Doey's head, just not out loud. This leads to Doey all of a sudden breaking out into fits of laughter at a joke one of them made in his head, much to others' confusion

Jack is not afraid to be himself. He'll giggle at nothing in particular, just because he feels like it. He'll cry in front of everyone, because he was simply sad. He'll do whatever. He accepts he is and will always be a doughman, and while he would give nearly everything to go home (he still sobs about it sometimes), he might as well make the time he's spending in the Safe Haven a happy and honest time

Kevin and Matthew are having a harder time accepting their fates, even after years. They very clearly remember the sun, their friends, their lives, growing up, getting their first pimple, getting nervous around girls, chewing gum, playing sports, getting sweaty, all of the normal teenager stuff. There are little bits of them that still believe that once they leave the factory, they can go back to being teens in a normal world. It's a terrible tugging feeling in their chests whenever they think about how impossible it is now. Matt used to have dreams of going to college. He wanted to be a teacher.

Doey stims a lot. (I personally like the headcanon that Kevin and Matt have autism, but shhhh, you didn't hear that....) His body makes it especially fun to stretch and stick and mess around whenever he's excited or bored, though Jack and Kevin often forget they're NINE HUNDRED POUNDS and CAN DEFINITELY KILL SOMEONE IF THEY GET TOO HAPPY

Side note: I LOVE how the guy in the Kevin tape says "nine...HUNDRED. POUNDS OF DOUGH." it's so funny, like yeah, Doey could accidentally thwack a critter if he flaps his hands too close to the poor thing

He can eat just about anything, but usually only eats toys that he knows are beyond reasoning with. Pianosaurus? Feral. He knows when to cut some of his losses

He was kinda self-conscious about his appearance (who wouldn't? You're made of dough) especially because Jack, Matt, and Kevin were never as tall nor weighed more than like, 150 pounds. Doey got over it pretty fast once Safe Haven got running and it's members said they thought he looked really cute (he is (: )

[writingwithciara]

Broken Bond ~Chris Sturniolo~

summary: the stupid reason chris stopped talking to his best friend

pairing: chris sturniolo x reader

word count: 4.3k

notes: allusions to sexual content, nearly toxic chris, sweet baby matt

masterlist

y/n and chris were inseparable from kindergarten all the way up to the summer between freshman and sophomore year. it was as if chris just decided he didn’t want to be in her life anymore. and that shocked everyone. but unfortunately for him, she was always going to be a permanent fixture in his life, whether he liked it or not because she was still close with nick and matt. they never felt the urge to get up and abandon her like he did.

but he believed he had a good reason.

the summer between 9th and 10th grade, chris noticed that y/n changed quite a bit. she had gone to florida to visit her grandma for a week and when she came back, her shorts were shorter and her shirts seemed to be tighter. every time chris saw her, he had an over abundance of unfamiliar thoughts. he didn’t like them so to cope with the change, he stopped talking to her altogether. he started going out of his way to make sure whenever she was at the house that he wouldn’t be.

and it broke her heart.

she spent the first week alone, afraid that matt and nick would also change their minds and leave her too. but on a cold rainy saturday morning, when matt showed up to her house with movies and snacks, she knew he wasn’t going anywhere. and for the rest of that summer, y/n spent all her free time with nick and matt, almost completely forgetting that chris even existed.

when the boys announced they were moving to la to move their career along, they invite y/n to come with them. she was supposed to go to school there anyway so she figured it would be easier for everyone. so they packed their bags and headed west.

when they got to town and the boys began their career, y/n found herself feeling alone again. especially when the boys had to leave to film a video. or when they went on tour. she joined them when she could but most of the fans were never happy with her presence, despite her blossoming career as a youtuber.

it was never matt or nick that made her feel alone though. they publicly defended her against the fans & spent whatever time they could with her. it was always chris who would make her feel unwanted. he just didn’t seem to care.

but he cared so much.

he could tell that basically abandoning her in sophomore year had really hurt her, both physically and emotionally, and he wanted to go back and change it all. but he couldn’t do anything about it now, nor could he get rid of the impure thoughts that littered his brain whenever she was around. she used to be his best friend and he shouldn’t have been feeling that way to begin with.

he couldn’t take back what he did in the past but he could try to make up for it in the present.

whenever he would see a fan comment something mean about her, he would send that person a message, completely defending y/n. but nobody ever knew about it.

so when the hate started to die down, chris felt like he did a good job. y/n was confused at first as to why she was getting fewer and fewer hate comments but brushed it off, happy they weren’t being mean to her anymore. it started taking a toll on her mental health. luckily for her, she still had matt. he helped her through her first everything and they were suddenly the inseparable ones. probably even more so than y/n and chris once were.

---

y/n was sitting in her room when nick called her. although she was confused, she picked up her phone and smiled. “why are you calling me when you live right upstairs?”

“y/n, i tested positive for covid so i'm stuck in quarantine until i'm better. and seeing as how you were just with me earlier today, i feel like you should get tested too, just in case.”

“oh okay.” y/n grabbed the text from her nightstand and sighed. she took the test and waited on the phone with nick. when it came back negative, she was relieved. she didn’t want to be stuck in her room all day every day. “i'm sorry you have it, nick. do they boys have it?”

“matt does but chris keeps testing negative.”

“so i can’t hang out with my 2 best friends but i'm gonna be stuck with chris? i would much rather have covid, honestly.”

“the week is going to fly by. i promise.” y/n smiled at her best friends optimism.

“i could always pretend i have it so i can avoid him.”

“that’s true.” nick chuckled. “but why would you do that?”

“i can’t be around him, nick.” y/n sighed.

“girl, it has been 6 years. it’s about time you bury your grudge.”

“i tried. but you can’t just get rid of several years of feeling every emotion. i loved him at one point and the fact that it was before he ditched me really hurts.”

“if it makes you feel any better, i could tell you why he ditched you, even if it is the most ridiculous reason ever.”

“you know?”

“not entirely. but i did read his journal entry from that date and although it lacked detail, it’s pretty obvious why he did it.”

“tell me.”

nick decided to describe the reason in as much detail as he could create. he painted a vivid picture for y/n but she didn’t seem to believe that was the reason chris stopped talking to her.

later that day, y/n was in the kitchen preparing a meal for the boys when chris decided he was hungry. he walked up the stairs and stopped at the top when he saw y/n at the stove. he could’ve turned around and headed back down to his room before she knew he was there but his stomach rumbled so he decided to walk to the fridge. y/n turned at the exact moment chris was reaching for the door, causing her to nearly slap him with the spatula she was holding.

neither of them said a word as they silently stared at each other. the tension was palpable and seeing y/n dressed in sweats with her hair up in a messy bun, caused chris to cough awkwardly. he shifted slightly as he tried to look anywhere but her face.

y/n was the first to break the silence. “what are you doing out of your room?”

“was hungry.” chris shrugged nonchalantly and opened the refrigerator. “need food too you know.”

“yeah but i figured you would’ve seen me and went back into your room, seeing as how that’s the way it’s been for 6 years.”

“my need for food was too strong.” chris turned but avoided her gaze. he looked down at the food in front of her. he went to grab some off the plate but she smacked his arm and pushed him away.

“this is for the 2 brothers who didn’t abandon me.” she looked at him.

“can you make me something too?”

“no.” she grabbed the plate and walked to matt’s room first. when she walked in, matt noticed she wasn’t wearing the mask she was supposed to.

“where’s your mask? i don’t want you to get sick too.”

“matt, i keep telling you that i don’t care. i'll be fine. and even if i do get sick, i know you’ll take care of me.”

“what makes you say that?” he asked, jokingly raising an eyebrow.

“okay fine. guess you don’t want this wonderful & delicious food i made you.” she picked up the plate and went to walk towards the door but matt’s whines stopped her.

“you know i'd take care of you. in sickness and in health.” he chuckled. y/n set the plate back on his desk and smiled.

“the way you’re talking sounds like we’re making a wedding vow.”

“that’s the deal, remember?” matt smirked, causing y/n to think back to their junior year of high school.

she had been in a relationship with a member of the lacrosse team for quite some time so when he abruptly dumped her with no explanation, she began to wonder if there was any hope for her. matt found her after a game and they had made the promise to marry each other if neither of them were in a serious relationship by the time they were 25.

“yeah i remember.” y/n smiled. “but i highly doubt that’s going to happen, matt.”

“and why do you say that?”

“because look at you. you’re…good looking and you have a great personality. plus, you’ve dated way more than i have. i think it’s safe to say that you’re more likely to be in a serious relationship at 25 years old than i am.”

“don’t sell yourself so short. you're good looking too, obviously. and you have the biggest heart out of anyone i know. your personality rocks and you’re going to find the right guy someday. gary just wasn’t the right one, of course.”

“you’re my favorite triplet, you know that right?”

“oh i am fully aware.” he chuckled and took a bite of the food she made. “don’t worry. i won’t tell nick.”

“i'm sure you will eventually.” y/n kissed his head and walked back to the kitchen. she ignored chris and took nick’s plate to his room. he was asleep so she left the plate on his nightstand and went back to the kitchen.

she had only been out of the room for 10 minutes and chris had somehow managed to make a huge mess.

“what the fuck are you doing, chris?”

“i'm trying to make myself some food since you won’t do it for me.” he rolled his eyes and focused back on the grilled cheese he was trying to make. or burn, y/n wasn’t sure what the endgame was.

“holy shit, you’re helpless.” y/n rolled her eyes and moved him out of the way. “go to your room and i'll call you up when it’s ready.”

“i don’t get room service?”

“don’t push your luck.” she pointed the spatula at him threateningly and smiled to herself as he retreated to his room in defeat. she began to cook his food and questioned why he was even talking to her, eventually chalking it up to the fact he was probably lonely without nick or matt.

when she finished cooking, she decided to bring it down to him. she knocked on the door and opened it slowly when she heard the faint ‘come in’. she set the plate down and was about to walk out when chris called out for her.

“wait, hold up.” he turned around in his chair and looked up at her. “thank you.”

“no problem.” she stood awkwardly as he stared at her. “can i go now? got a big mess to clean up.”

“yeah you can go. but, um, don’t worry about the mess. i did it so i'll clean it.”

“okay?” y/n was more confused now than she was earlier. she walked out of the room as chris resumed the game he was playing.

chris' eyes roamed the computer screen in front of him but his mind was running rampant with thoughts again.

“how am i supposed to get her out of my head?” he muttered to himself. he could hear nate laughing on the other end of the headset.

“still can’t believe you stopped being her friend just because she got boobs.”

“she got boobs and she got hot. all it took was one week.” chris sighed.

“and you’ve been in love with you since you were 8. in case you forgot, that was before she was hot. so why did her, um, development have to change the dynamic between you two?”

“i don’t know. it just did.” chris sighed frustratedly and looked down at his phone, suddenly coming with a way to get rid of the thoughts that wouldn’t leave. “i'm gonna go now. play later though, okay?” nate said his goodbyes before chris hung up. his attention turned to his phone. he picked it up and opened instagram. the first post he saw was a picture of y/n and he thought it was perfect. he took a screenshot and added it to his album filled with pictures of her through the years. chris swiped a few times until he settled on a picture of y/n that he always loved. he knew matt had taken it but he didn’t care. she was smiling and wearing an orange fresh love hoodie. it was right after he launched his brand and he gave them each a hoodie, purposely giving y/n the orange one, even thought it would drive him crazy.

and it was certainly driving him crazy. he hated that it didn’t take much for him to get excited but he also loved that it was only y/n that could do it for him.

y/n was watching netflix in the living room when she just happened to glance over at the kitchen. it was still a mess and she hadn’t seen chris in a few hours.

curiosity got the best of her and she found herself slowly approaching chris’ bedroom door. it was slightly ajar and she could see a faint light coming from the crack, along with some low music coming from his speaker. his voice could be heard but he was muttering something y/n couldn’t hear. she quietly pushed the door open a little more and her jaw nearly dropped at the sight before her.

chris was facing away from her but from the way his arm was moving, y/n knew what was going on. that didn’t bother her though. it was what he was getting himself off to that bothered her. there, right on his screen, was a picture of her. it took every ounce of self-control not to scream out loud or go over and berate him for using a picture of her.

she stood there, unable to move, and watched as chris finished himself off. he rolled onto his back with his eyes closed and y/n found herself finally able to make a run for it. too bad she suddenly lacked the coordination to do so and crashed into the wall. chris' shot open and he looked at y/n. she was trying to look anywhere other than him. he pulled the blanket up to cover himself and couldn’t find the words he needed to say.

“i just….i’m just gonna head out now.” y/n almost slipped as she stood up and rushed back up to the living room. there was no way she just witnessed that.

the week that followed was even more awkward than it had been before. y/n never went out of her own way to avoid chris before but how was she supposed to look him in the eye after what she saw?

when nick and matt both tested negative and were able to come out of their rooms, matt was the first to point out the tension in the air. nick brushed it off and told y/n she was going to be in their car video, giving her no time to argue as the 4 of them piled into the car.

matt took them to mcdonald’s to get food then drove them to an empty parking lot and they began to film. y/n wasn’t sure of what the topic was and the only thing she could focus on was chris.

“how are you guys feeling today?” chris asked, keeping his gaze on matt, fearing that if he looked to the backseat, y/n would disappear.

“i'm feeling fantastic actually.” nick threw a few fries into his mouth. “so glad i can actually taste things again.”

“yeah me too.” matt smiled and shoved some fries in his own mouth. “i'm also glad that you two didn’t kill each other or burn the house down while we were stuck in our rooms.”

“chris almost burned it down on the first day.” y/n stirred her mcflurry and looked at matt. “after i brought you your food that day, i returned to the kitchen and this kid was wither trying to consume a charred sandwich or was intentionally trying to burn the house down.”

“hey now.” chris spoke directly to y/n but caught himself and looked at matt. “she refused to cook me a meal.”

“i don’t blame her.” nick rolled his eyes and looked back at y/n. “but you should’ve known letting the kid in the kitchen unsupervised would result in a disaster.”

“did you end up making him food anyway?” matt chuckled.

“of course. couldn't let him attempt it again.” y/n attempted to joke and looked up to see chris looking at her through the rearview mirror. he looked away quickly. nick witnessed the awkward interaction and he shared a look with matt. matt stopped recording so they could address the tension in the car privately.

“what’s going on with you two? one minute, things are back to normal between you two & the next second, it’s like you guys were never friends at all.”

“yeah. what happened?”

“nothing happened.” y/n and chris said at the same time. nick shook his head, clearly not buying it.

“that’s fucking bullshit. the tension, as strong as it was before, has never been this intense. why is it so awkward? did someone see something they shouldn’t have?” nick chuckled and when they didn’t respond, his eyes widened. “wait, what?!”

“you’re joking, right?” matt glanced between them. “tell us.”

“i’d rather not. it was kind of embarrassing.” y/n looked out the window behind nick.

“so did chris see something?”

“no. y/n saw something.” chris sighed and looked back at y/n. “and i'm sorry.”

“it’s okay, chris.” y/n avoided eye contact and opted to look at matt.

“well, what did you see then?” nick questioned, getting more and more invested in the story.

“she caught me, um…..” chris glanced down at his lap, hoping his brothers would pick up on the hint. they did, immediately going crazy.

“what? no way!” matt couldn’t contain his laughter. nick on the other hand was too grossed out to even speak.

“told you it was embarrassing.” chris glanced out the window, hoping nobody would bring up what he was using to satisfy himself and thanking y/n for not mentioning it.

the rest of the video went by rather smoothly after the revelation. when they got back to the house, y/n and chris were in the kitchen while the other 2 went to shower. chris was focused on his phone and y/n was finally ready to ask why.

“i know it’s a week late but i was just wondering-“

“no, i'm not going to tell you why it was your picture. i don’t need you to hate me anymore than you already do.” chris sighed, not even taking his view off the phone as he answered the question she never finished.

“chris, i don’t hate you. and as much as i have tried to do it in the past, i just can’t. you may hate me but we’re clearly going to be in each other’s lives forever, whether or not we want to  be. so maybe we should just start at the beginning.”

“i don’t hate you, y/n. that’s the fucking problem.” chris set his phone down and finally looked up at her. she was scared of the sudden aggressiveness in his tone.

“then why the fuck did you stop talking to me before sophomore year?!”

before chris could answer, matt came out of his bathroom. his hair was still damp and he was attempting to dry it with a towel. he looked up and could feel the tension again. “what just happened?”

“nothing.” chris picked up his phone and went down to his room, slightly slamming the door.

matt just turned to y/n with an apologetic look. “i'm sorry.”

“not your fault.” she sighed and walked over to him. “let’s just go to your room.”

matt didn’t argue with her as they both climbed into the bed, passing out shortly after.

chris was not as lucky. he stayed awake for most of the night, trying to come up with a valid explanation for the picture.

when he finally managed to get to sleep, he was woken up by a soft knock on his door frame. he looked up to see y/n standing in the shadows. he sat up straight and looked towards her.

“we need to talk, chris. so please don’t brush this whole thing off. i'm being serious. don't change the topic when you know i want a clear answer. got it?”

as rare it was, chris loved it when y/n would get a little bossy. thankfully, it was dark and the blanket was hiding everything from view. “okay.”

“first, i need to know why you ditched me that summer. then i need to know why it was my picture you were jerking off to. and please don’t lie to me, chris. i know your tell.”

“if you know my tell, then how come you couldn’t figure out that i have never once had a bit of hatred towards you in my life? how come you didn’t figure out anything from the past? i don’t think you know what my tell is.”

“fine. i don’t. but i want to know the reason you dropped me like i meant absolutely nothing to you. are you gonna tell me or am i just going to have to go tell matt what you were using when i caught you?”

“fine. i'll tell you. just please don’t tell him. he’ll kick my ass for being a ‘pervert’ and i would rather that not happen.” chris shifted himself on the bed as y/n walked closer. she was wearing matt’s blue fresh love t-shirt and her legs were bare but chris knew she had shorts underneath. “the reason i stopped talking to you that summer was because when you came back from florida, you changed.”

“changed how? my tastes and personality were exactly the same.”

“no. i mean, um…” he hovered his hands over his chest and gestured them outwards. y/n quirked  an eyebrow before catching on.

“oh.” she looked down at her feet. “that’s the stupidest excuse i have ever heard.”

“i had to stay away from you as much as possible because when you came around, my mind was fully clouded with very impure thoughts and i didn’t want to keep them. plus, i didn’t want to be around when all the guys came out of the woodwork to ask you on a date. i figured with distance and time, i could stop myself from wanting to kick the crap out of every guy that suddenly decided you were interesting, just because you had boobs.”

“chris-“

“and then gary, the only guy i ever truly felt jealous of, asked you out and you guys dated for a while. i hated that so much. he didn’t treat you how you deserved.”

“oh, and you did?” y/n felt angry at this revelation. “you don’t get to stand there and tell me how i deserve to be treated when you didn’t treat me any better than those guys did. it's complete bullshit, chris.”

“i was a stupid teenager all jacked up on hormones. i didn’t know how else to deal with the feelings that were bubbling up inside.”

“that’s still no excuse, chris. do you have any idea how many nights i cried myself to sleep after, thinking i just wasn’t ever going to be good enough to be your friend? every fucking night, chris!” y/n tried to keep her voice down but she kept getting angrier. chris pulled her into his room and shut the door.

“will you keep it down? you're gonna wake matt.” chris let go of her shoulders and sat back on his bed as y/n began to pace.

“the way you’ve been treating me for 6 years is not fair. do you know how hard it was to get over you? it seriously fucked with my mental health.” y/n paused and looked over at chris. “so, were my boobs the only reason you stopped talking to me?”

“yeah. well that, and the fact that i had a terrible crush on you since we were 8. you should know that i'm not the best at expressing how i feel. i do stupid stuff all the time. for instance, i have an entire album on my phone filled with pictures of you and since i'm being honest, i use them sometimes.”

“for what?”

“seriously?” he looked up at her and noticed she was standing at the end of the bed. he could see the look of realization flash through her eyes.

“oh. right. that thing.” y/n shifted on her feet before sitting on the end of the bed, facing chris. “so why did you use my picture? why not use one of the other girls you find attractive?”

“i literally don’t find any other girl attractive.” he looked away from her and missed the look she shot him. he only looked up when he felt the mattress move beneath him. when he finally looked back at her, she was sitting in front of him.

“you’re lying.” she looked into his eyes and held the eye contact as he swallowed nervously

“no i'm really not.” he shook his head and his eyes flicked down to her lips. “you’ve always been the only attractive girl i know. and i'm sorry i could never find the proper way to tell you.”

“well you’re telling me now.” she looked at him. “the next time you need to ‘take care of yourself’ please come find me. i would be more than happy to help.” y/n climbed off the bed and made her way back to the door. “good night, chris.”

she walked out of the room, leaving chris no opportunity to beg for her help.

taglist: @worldlxvlys @carolinalikesthings @fearfam69691

[chrisspirategirl]

Two hearts, one pulse

જ⁀➴ Matthew Sturniolo

“It’s really nice to talk to you, it’s really nice to hold your hand”

Matthew Sturniolo was the kind of guy who blended into the background—not because he didn’t have anything to say but because he wasn’t sure anyone wanted to hear it. He was blunt when he wanted to be but his words were too bold for anyone to bare so he remained quiet just so he wouldn’t put himself into more drama than he already has. He wasn’t afraid to speak his mind but he chooses to stay silent.

That was what you admired most about him, his ‘idgaf’ behavior, it made you wish you could easily say no but the taste of that word felt bitter on your tongue. You were too sweet so easy for someone to take advantage of your kindness until you felt like you had to be there for someone who never returned that same affection you 100% always gave.

You were considered popular morally by the fact that you were incredibly sweet to anyone and everyone and jaw droppingly gorgeous! You were the kind of popular that didn’t come from trying too hard—people just gravitated towards you. The way you smiled, how you remembered names, how you made everyone feel seen, never put others down. You were the type to spark up a room without even saying a word but batting your pretty lashes and smiling.

You were truly admired. By MANY people including Matthew Sturniolo. But you were unaware of that since he always had an expression of disinterest only saying something to his brothers, close friends, or something he’s actually interested in.

In your 6th period anatomy class you were assigned to be partners with Matt, only after 2 weeks of working with him you both managed to form a friendship where he expressed more emotion towards you rather than his usual quiet and collected self, you were happy he found you as someone to trust.

Matt found himself eventually falling for you, hard. He already thought you were really pretty but he always doubted his chances of being with you so he never bothered to try and swoop you off your feet.

It was only Monday that he started throwing subtle hints at you, some you were able to catch onto but others you assumed he was just being nice.

“I really like your hair..”

“Do you want to touch it?”

“That jumper looks cute on you”

“Thanks, I should wear it more often then..”

Friday afternoon, sitting beside Matt in 6th hour giggle to each other and making small jokes, he’s sitting a bit closer than he normally would, but you didn’t mind. He softly tucks a strand on hair behind your ear, one thing you’ve learned about Matt was how affectionately touchy he was. Like he needed physical touch to show you how much he liked being around you.

He twirls a strand of your hair whispering to you, “I’ve been thinking.. maybe we should hang out”

“Like after school?”

He nods his head, “yeah. If you’re available” his eyes glued onto you and only you, eye contact was another thing you learned about him, he was very good at holding it, you always had to look away after a few seconds because it always made you nervous.

“Yeah, I am” you respond, your head rested on the palm of your hand and your elbow resting on the table.

“Great, I was thinking we could go to the park, you said you liked to find ladybugs right?” He asked remembering about one of your hobbies you had told him about, the fact he remembered had your stomach fuming with butterflies, your cheeks heating. Nodding you head you give him a small smile, “yeah, I can’t believe you remembered” you add with a small giggle.

“How could I forget.” He says looking down at you, he wasn’t trying to hide that he was opening flirting with you, by now he was very confident in what he said and did around you. He just really hoped that the feeling was mutual.

Agreeing to your little hang out, you both depart after 6th hour, the final bell rings after your last period. Every student rushing to leave and go home to enjoy the weekend. Packing your things you were the second to last student to leave the class, spotting Matt standing just outside of the classroom waiting for you.

“Hey angelface” he says with a grin on his face, grabbing your backpack from your hands gently and slinging it over his shoulder. “Matt you really don’t have to carry my backpack” you protest not wanting to make him feel like he has to do everything for you just because he is a man, “believe me, if I didn’t want to I wouldn’t” he responded as he opened the door for you letting you out first before walking out behind you.

“But still I can carry my backpack” you said trying to prove a point but he only brushed it off.

“You’re cute when trying to prove a point” he teased, opening the passenger side door for you letting you slide in and closing it after you’re settled inside, he walks over to the drivers backseat putting both of your backpacks inside the back and getting into the drivers seat.

The engine roaring to life, he pulls out of the parking lot driving towards the SunnyDay Park that was only 8 minutes away from the school. He parks in the front of the parks parking lot and climbs out to open the door for you, pressing the lock button on his car keys that hung to the belt loop of his jeans.

The spring weather making it the perfect time to spot lady bugs since the grass was being watered frequently, you wasted no time in going to find some that crawled on the green grass.

Crouching down to get a better view your eyes skimmed through the small patches of 4 leaf clovers spotting the familiar red and black insects mindlessly crawling over the plants. Little hobbies like these brought you a lot of joy, it always fascinates you how such small bugs can be such an impact to the environment.

Matt crouched down beside you, watching (mostly) you just admiring the small insects, you gently put your hand out watching the small bugs crawling onto your finger where it continues crawling down to the palm of your hand.

“Woah, sick” Matt comments as he watched in amazement, quickly pulling out his phone to snap a photo of the bug in your hand.

“Do you mind?” He asked indicating if it was okay if he took a picture of you, “course not” you responded, you loved taking pictures so the fact he offered to take one of you put a huge smile on your face, he snaps the photo of you immediately leaning closer to show the picture, “absolutely flawless” he says, okay now he’s definitely flirting with you..

“I love it, send me that” you say to which he nods his head obeying your request.

“Here hold it” you said moving your hand closer to his for him to grab the bug, he was hesitant at first but could he really ever say no to you? His hand sticks out and the lady bug crawls onto his finger, he watches carefully the insects movement not wanting to drop it. He’s so focused you find it adorable.

You pull out your phone this time, “smile” you say softly grabbing his attention towards you where he gives a faint little smile, ‘Snap!’ He looks back down at the bug that crawls around his hand, his hat covering the upper half of his face, ‘Snap!’

“Aww that’s so cute” you comment showing him the picture, he only chuckles and shakes his head.

He gently sets the ladybug down on the ground, looking over at you staring in pure adoration, one side of your hair tucked behind your head showing off the ethereal side profile, the sight of you beside him never failed to make his heart flutter, the way your lips slightly pouted naturally or the way your eyes glowed in the sunlight, he felt grateful that he was able to see this little moment.

His hands go clammy, the rush of adrenaline of just thinking about what he’s about to do. But he remembered that it was now or never.

“Y/n..” he asked soothingly, your eyes shift from the ground to meet his ocean blue, “yeah?” You responded lightly, it was no help that you were already making him extremely nervous but you being so soft spoken only did so much to a man.

His tongue swipes across his bottom lip before continuing, “you know.. I read somewhere that ladybugs actually bring good luck. If one were to land on you it meant that good things were coming your way.”

You arch a brow at him before the right side of your face rests on your knees, “yeah?” You responded amused, he nods his head feeling his chest tighten pausing for a brief second before adding “but I don’t need a ladybug to tell me I’m lucky, cause I’m here with you.” He glanced up at you smiling nervously.

“I like you, more than just a friend. Every time we talk or just sit beside each other I find another corner of you I never want to forget.” His eyes search yours hoping to find some sort of mutual feeling in those gorgeous doe eyes. He waits, nervously for you to say something—anything back.

A small smile forms on your face, “bold of you to confess your feelings to me at peak ladybug hour” you responded teasingly, he lets out the little breath that he wasn’t aware he was holding in his throat, a sheepish chuckle escaping his lips.

“I really like you, Matt” you answered, your voice barely louder than the breeze but steady to where he could easily pick it up.

His heart practically melting at your words, for a girl with such a soft demeanor you definitely knew how to break him.

“Though now in wondering if it was the ladybugs that made you confess to me, should I be thanking them?” You teased earning a warming laugh from Matt.

“Next time try a butterfly, maybe I’ll kiss you”

Sorry guys just wishing I had a relationship like y/n and Matt 💔💔💔💔💔💔 but lowkey I would also make a fanfic about this :3.. anyways I really loved writing this one mostly because this is my dream confession spot so why not write about it 💘💘 AND OMG THANK YOH SO MUCH FOR 40 FOLLOWERS THAT IS ACTUALLY CRAZH I FW YOU GUYS SO HEAVY 😭😭🩵🔥🙏

Taglist! :: @courta13 & @heartsonlyforchris

Besos a mis amores!

↳ @chrisspirategirl 💌

Dividers from —> @bernardsbendystraws

[wilhelminyard]

compilation of nice/sweet things the foxes said to neil because even though they're a bunch of assholes who'll insult anyone in their vicinity they all just love him so damn much (part 2) :

ANDREW :

"I'm not here for your entertainment" "but as expected you are talented enough to multitask"

"you are neil josten and I am still the man who said he would keep you alive. I don't care if you use this phone tomorrow. I don't care if you never use it again. but you are going to keep it on you because one day you might need it. on that day you're not going to run. you're going to think about what I promised you and you're going to make the call."

"I'm not afraid of you" "that's why you're so interesting"

DAN :

"don't thank us, remember us. we're your teammates. we're here to help you with whatever you need."

"you've got us now"

"that was perfect. but don't do something that reckless again. we can't replace you. hear me?"

"neil, you can use the girls' shower while we're busy"

MATT :

"just try not to think about it until we get there. you won't do yourself any favorite if you spend the ride stressing out about things you can't change."

"if you don't have anywhere to go, I'll drag you home with me"

KEVIN :

"if you get hurt out there, you do something about it. you take it easy, you have coach pull you, you ask abby for help - I don't care. if you ever say 'I'm fine' about your health again I will make you rue the day you were born"

"neil has no place in riko's games. he is a fox."

"run. it's the only way you'll survive"

"you should be court."

"will you still teach me?" "every night."

"I will watch you. if you want to drink tonight. I won't let you say something you'll regret." "you'll be drunk inside an hour. then who'll stop me?" "I would stop drinking."

"you're not going. do you know what he'll do to you?"

WYMACK :

"why did you pay for stalls coach?" "maybe I knew you'd need them one day"

"neil, if you can't be here say so. abby can take you elsewhere until it's time to leave. get out of here and get some fresh air."

"what can I do?" "I don't know" "when you know, tell me"

"sometimes the world feels so big but then I'm reminded how small it is" "big or small just remember you're not alone in it."

"if riko really was behind it somehow, the blame is all on him. he chose to take out his petty rage on seth. he chose to cross a line. you didn't. you hear me? you didn't. don't ever blame yourself for seth's death. that it too dangerous a road to walk down. you keep your eyes on your own path and keep moving forward"

"neil" "I'm fine" "be fine inside where it's warmer"

"look I know I've always told you all to take your personal problems up with betsy or abby. I've said it's not my place to get into anything outside the court. I hope you've figured out by now I'm just blowing hot air. I'm not real good at being a shoulder, but I do have a working set of ears."

"help me" "let me"

"this doesn't mean anything. I'm still a fox." "of course you are."

NICKY :

"kid you're killing me. why do you always get that deer-in-headlights look when someone does something nice for you?"

"you worry about neil's career. I'll worry about his personal happiness."

"I didn't really get into the gritty details last time because those aren't reallt dan and matt's business, but you're family, so I can tell you."

"there's obsession and there's dysfunction. you can't make exy your end-all be-all. this won't last forever, okay? you'll shine bright, then you'll retire, and then what? you gonna spend the rest of your life at home alone with all your trophies? you can't be just this, neil. this isn't enough to live for."

"thanks for taking one for the team, neil. you're a real friend."

"are we? friends?" "you are going to be the absolute death of me. yeah, kid. we're friends. you're stuck with us, like it or not."

"I only see that look on neil's face when someone tries to do something nice for him, but we all know kevin's as bratty as they come. what did you say, kevin, and do I need to defend neil's honor or what?"

RENEE :

"I am not the girl I once was but the shade of my old life will always existe inside of me. that is what helps me connect with andrew. I am hoping it will help me connect with you."

"I do not know your story. if you've trusted andrew with anything, he hasn't shared the details with me and he never will. but if you are as like us as we first predicted you to be, perhaps one day you can also come to see me as a friend."

"if either andrew or I can help you, please know we are here."

"and you neil? are you all right?"

[ghsface]

I knew it, i know you - Matt Sturniolo

Sumary: You return to a place in the past, where memories and guilt haunt you as you find your ex, facing what you could never let go of.

Warnings: angst, break up, insecurities (on the part of the protagonist) guilt, no happy ending, I think that's all.

A/n: Merry Christmas super late, I've been really inactive so sorry about that but I'm back now yayy, I wrote a second part of this fic if you can call it that idk, I wasn't sure about posting this version because I wrote a happy ending in the other version, I'll probably post both as an alternate ending so enjoy this and happy holidays!!!<3

𝜗𝜚 Part one , alternative ending

⛧°。 ⋆༺ ✮ ༻⋆。 °⛧

The cold night wind hit you as you left the restaurant, sending a chill down your spine that had nothing to do with the weather. You walked down the cobblestone streets of the city that was once your refuge, your home, but now felt alien. With every step you took, you could hear the echo of your own thoughts, and the words you never said to Matt repeated in your mind like a mantra of regret.

You had decided to leave him, decided that it was best for both of you to be apart, but that decision hadn't brought the peace you'd hoped for. All it had accomplished was filling your life with awkward silences, lonely nights, and memories that seemed to torment you more with each passing day.

The night was calm, but your emotions were a whirlwind. Every corner you turned reminded you of a moment with him. There was the cafe where he knelt in the snow to tie his shoe while you laughed nonstop. There was the park where you shared your first kiss, when Matt had taken you by surprise and made you feel like the whole world had stopped for an instant.

The city lights flickered above you, and cars whizzed by, but all you could feel was the weight of his gaze on the restaurant, the way his eyes had pierced you, as if they could see every single regret you carried in your chest.

When you finally stopped, you were facing the river. The water reflected the city lights, creating a colorful spectacle you couldn’t enjoy. You just stared at your reflection, searching for answers in a version of yourself you no longer recognized.

“Why?” you wondered out loud, even though you knew there would be no answer. The reason had always been the same: fear. Fear of being happy, fear of not being enough, fear of Matt realizing he loved you more than you could love yourself.

You didn't know how long you were there, lost in your thoughts, until you heard a familiar voice behind you.

"I didn't think I'd find you here."

You turned around, and there he was. Matt. With his hands in his pockets, his hair ruffled by the wind, and that look that had always left you speechless.

"Matt..." you murmured, as if his name were a confession.

He took a step towards you, but kept his distance, as if he was afraid that getting closer might break what little remained between you.

"Why did you leave so quickly?" he asked, his voice calm but full of that intensity he'd always had.

You wanted to answer, but the words stuck in your throat. How to explain something that you yourself couldn't understand?

"I didn't want to interrupt..." you started, but he shook his head before you could finish.

"Don't lie. We're not at that point anymore, right?"

His honesty hit you like a bucket of cold water. He had always had that ability to see right through you, to decipher the emotions you didn't even know you felt.

“I didn’t want to make this harder for you,” you finally admitted, shifting your gaze back to the river.

“Make what harder?” he asked, taking a step closer. “See you? Talk to you? Because, believe me, nothing can be harder than the last few months without you.”

His confession made the air feel heavier. You looked up at him, and his eyes were filled with pain, but also something else: hope.

“Matt, I…” You tried to speak, but he cut you off.

“No, let me speak this time.” His voice shook slightly, but there was a firmness to it that you couldn’t ignore. “I don’t know what happened, I don’t know why you walked away, but I know that I haven’t stopped loving you for a second.”

The words hit you with a force you didn’t expect. Tears filled your eyes, and for a moment, all you wanted was to run to him and tell him you were sorry, that you loved him, that you never stopped.

But the fear was still there, like a shadow you couldn’t shake.

“Matt, I can’t…” you murmured, and you watched as the glimmer of hope in his eyes slowly faded.

He nodded, taking a step back, as if he understood there was nothing more to say.

“It’s okay.” His voice was soft, but the sadness was evident. “I just wanted you to know.”

And with those words, he turned and began to walk, leaving you alone once again, with the sound of the river and the echo of what could have been.

You watched him walk away, and a part of you wanted to run after him, to scream his name and ask for another chance. But your feet remained planted on the ground, unable to move.

When you finally turned around and started walking in the opposite direction, you felt like you were carrying with you not only the weight of your own regrets, but also that of his love, a love you never knew how to accept, but one you would always carry with you.

And as you walked away, the city seemed darker, emptier, as if it knew that, this time, there would be no turning back.

⛧°。 ⋆༺ ✮ ༻⋆。 °⛧

your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly, and feel free to leave a request ✮

Tags... @matthewsroses @sophand4n4 @strnilolover @lolastrniolo @marrykisskilled @sweetshuga

[witchygagirlwrites]

Kelly Severide x Reader x Matt Casey/ Sevasey x Reader

Relationship headcanons. Who has what qualities in the relationship?

Kelly

Kelly is the king of PDA he does not care. This man is kissing you before he goes into a fire and when he comes out. You're in the common area at the firehouse? You're sitting in his lap.

Wants to have his arm around you in public. He's got you tucked into his side whenever the three of you are out especially if Matt has to step away for any reason

Did you win him by getting to open up about Shay or because you tackled him during a two am snowball fight and stuck a handful of snow down his shirt and ran off cackling like a mad woman?

Loves seeing you wear his shirts, especially just a simple t-shirt that barely hits your thighs when you're lazing around the house or when he realizes that shirt you're wearing at work is his or Matt's. He walks around with a grin all day.

Loves when you want to watch a movie because most of the time he gets the spot laying against you with his head against your stomach and your hands on his shoulders or smoothing over his chest during the movie.

The first time him and Matt both slept with you they really didn't know what to expect. At work you were a spitfire of a thing and that seemed to carry over into the bedroom. You weren't shy to let them know what you liked and didn't. Kelly fell even harder then and there (and also discovered the fact that you will melt if he says yes ma'am to you)

This man would NEVER purposely make you jealous, that being said he loves when you show that streak because to him? That means you're happy enough to consider him and Matt something worth losing. He'll always drag you away before you swing though.

Matt

Not as big on PDA as Kelly. Now if he has a close call? He is headed straight for you or if you had a bad day and want to be in his arms? He doesn't care. Other than that, beyond a simple kiss he'd rather love on you in private.

Holds your hand in public. Always has his fingers laced with yours unless Kelly has to step away for some reason then he's pulling you in front of him and basically tucking you into his chest until Kelly returns.

Your spirit won him, plain and simple. This man loves people that aren't afraid to fight for what they believe in and the day you were willing to fight an entire station house in defense of him and Kelly? Heart eyes

Like Kelly he loves seeing you around the house in his shirts but he prefers when you steal his button ups to lounge around in, maybe it's because he gets to see a little more? Who know but when he notices a shirt you're wearing at work is his or Kelly's? He can't stop staring at you and smiling

When you want to watch a movie and curl up with your back to his chest and your head laying against him? His favorite time of the day

Picked up on the fact that you love the use of "Yes ma'am" and this fucker uses it daily to get under your skin. He's worse than Kelly with teasing you with it.

When you get jealous he tries to calm you then and there before it gets to the point of swinging "Love, why would we want anyone else?" he's kissing you long and hard until the subject of your jealousy gets the point and leaves.

As a Duo loving you

Let's be honest, we know these two are still gonna bump heads. When they start arguing at work EVERYONE turns to you. It's hilarious to see two six foot something firemen immediately default to their little spitfire medic.

When you and Sylvie have to work a scene these two have constant eyes on you (especially Kelly because of losing Shay how he did)

Jealous? These two? No..never..yeah right. These two are jealous if another man looks at you too hard. They know you're happy, they know you love them as much as they love you but the idea of another man thinking of you like that? Let's just say that's one time Matt's temper tries to match Kelly's.

Always has you between them when they sleep. You run cold at night and they figured that out quick. It's a win win. Besides being between two hot firemen (double meaning there) means you no longer have to bundle up to sleep.

None of you really do rings so you wear matching pendants instead to mark that you're each others

Would love to have kids with you one day if you ever bought it up but they would never push you because even if you never wanted kids they're perfectly happy with just you.

@desimarie12

[teapartyprincess4two]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE WRITE SOMETHING FOR MATT BASED ON THE SONG HEARTBREAK GIRL BY 5SOS.

Idc how long it is (the longer the better)

pls pls pls I will sell my left foot to read it 🙏

Heartbreak Girl- M. Sturniolo

pairing: Taken!reader x BestFriend!Matt

classification: angst

warnings: pining, clueless reader, toxic relationship, jealousy, heartbreak, friendzone, slight cursing, use of y/n, unrequited love, mentions of cheating, panic attack, no happy ending (sorry, the song calls for it)

inspiration: request^^, Heartbreak Girl by 5SOS

summary: Matt’s in love with you, but you’re too in love with someone else to realize it.

Heartbreak Girl PT.1, PT.2

—

Matt’s phone rings loudly on his bedside table, waking him from his sleep. His eyes jolt open, the loud ringing scaring him. He knows who’s calling, but hopes it’s someone else this time so he can hang up without being eaten alive by the guilt. A sigh leaves his lips as he checks the caller ID, your name shining brightly on his phone screen. He rubs the sleep out of his eyes as he answers, “y/n?” Your sobs immediately fill the room as they emit from his phone speaker, he grimaces slightly at the loud noise and holds the phone away from his face.

It was always the same thing with you, you’d call him late at night complaining and crying about something your boyfriend, Mike, did. Matt would comfort you time and time again, advising you to just break up with that loser and sometimes you’d listen. You and Mike would break up, sometimes for as long as a week, but you’d always end up welcoming him back into you life at the slightest apology.

“What did he do this time?” Matt asks, another sigh leaving his mouth. He’s propped up on an elbow, his head hanging forward with his eyes shut as he tries fighting sleep. If you were anyone else he would’ve stopped picking up your calls a long time ago, but you’re his best friend and he feels a sense of responsibility for you. “First, he called me annoying and then we got in this big fight and then he left. He said he’s going back to his ex,” you hiccup, barely sounding coherent through your sobs.

Matt wants to scream into his pillow, was this not the same fight you had with Mike last week? “Well-” Matt begins, but is quickly interrupted by you. “He accused me of cheating too! Doesn’t he know I love him? I’d never cheat!” you exclaim through the phone, your words coming out a mile a minute.

Love. Matt cringed at the word, how could you possible love a guy who’s favorite pass time was making you cry.

Matt could tell you were entering a stare of hysteria, your breathing was erratic and you wouldn’t stop crying. “Alright, y/n. Try to calm down,” he whispers sternly, trying to bring you back to reality. With every late night phone call Matt gained more and more reasons to hate your stupid boyfriend. “Okay… I’m calm,” you reply, bringing your voice down and attempting to steady your breathing. He knows you’re faking it, but he appreciates that you’re at least trying.

“Okay, now telling me what happened,” he instructs, a part of him wanting to hear all the details of your argument so his hatred for your boyfriend would be more justified. You retold the events in excruciating detail, mentioning everything that was said and done. So much of it repulsed Matt, how could two people treat each other like that? He felt his heart breaking with each word, but the anger he felt was much stronger, “he really called you that?!”

Matt’s jaw was clenched, his teeth grinding against each other in the process. He heard your sniffles on the other side of the phone, a part of him wished he could just hold you. “Yeah, but he’s not that bad,” your voice was hushed, almost like you were afraid. You sounded scared to admit it, mostly because you knew Matt would get mad. You, of course, guess correctly because Matt replies angrily, “He’s not THAT bad?!?”

If he had any common sense he’d just hang the phone up now because there was obviously no getting through to you. But, a part of him is praying that one day you’ll realize what a loser Mike is and then maybe you’ll realize that he’s been here all along. “Well, I mean, it takes two to fight,” you reply in an attempt to defend your last statement. Matt rubs his temples, trying to massage his growing headache away.

“Y/n, stop being so naive,” he says harshly. At this point his anger has completely consumed him but he bites his tongue to stop the venom from spilling.

“Don’t be mean,” you mumble. There was no excuse for Mike’s behavior, not that you were much better, but you couldn’t let this become your forever. “I’m not being mean. I’m being real,” he replies, his voice softening a bit when he realizes how harsh his words sounded.

A brief silence settles in the conversation, but Matt can hear soft mumbling in the background. Matt assumes you’re talking but somehow the audio got muffled. “I can’t hear you,” he says, turning the volume up on his phone. The mumbling gets a little louder and then suddenly he hears it, it’s Mike. He must’ve come back once he cooled off, he’s sure to reel you back in with broken promises and empty apologies.

“Matt, I have to go. Mike is here,” you whisper into the phone, clearly scared to be caught venting your problems to your best friend. Mike, Mike, Mike. What was so special about Mike anyways? Sometimes, if Matt repeated the name enough it almost sounded like his own name. Matt, Matt, Matt. He wished it was.

He wants to beg you to stay on the phone, but he knows there’s no use. All he can do is advise you to choose better and hope that this time you’ll listen, “y/n, don’t do anything stupid.” There’s a lot of shuffling coming from your end, if Matt closes his eyes he can imagine every single movement. “Okay, bye friend. Love you,” you say quickly.

Friend. That is a word Matt will be reduced to for the rest of his life. He wants to be more than that with you, but a part of him knows that you two will be stuck going in circles again and again. You fight Mike, you break up, you cry to Matt, you make up with Mike, and Matt’s lost his chance with you yet another time.

Before he can reply he hears the phone click, you hung up. He knows that you’re probably already reconciling with Mike and even though it makes him mad, it mostly makes him feel helpless. Matt tosses his phone back onto his bedside table before dramatically falling back onto the bed. He knows that if you just opened your eyes you’d realize that he was here all along, that he’d never hurt you.

But, despite his better judgement, Matt will keep picking up your phone calls because he’s a sucker when it comes to you.

—

The sound of arcade games echo around the building as Matt and his brothers walk around the arcade in an attempt to find the perfect game. They only had a few tokens left, so they had to spend them wisely. You were there too, but you were so immersed in Mike’s presence that it was like you weren’t. Matt had invited you in hopes to finally get you alone, away from Mike. But, that stupid guy followed you like his life depended on it. You were so enthralled by Mike that you hadn’t even played a single game, even Nick and Chris found it annoying.

“What about ski ball?” Chris suggests, the three of them had lapped around the arcade a billion times and still couldn’t find the right game. “No,” Nick says, peering around the arcade for a better game. “Bumper cars?” Chris suggests again, running out of options to say. “We don’t even have enough tokens for that,” Matt scoffs, joining Nick as he looks around the room.

“Fine you pick,” Chris grumbles, leaning against the nearest game as he waits for his brothers to choose. As they’re surveying the room, Nick and Matt see you in the corner talking with your boyfriend. You two seemed to be caught up in an argument like usual, earning an eye roll from Nick. “I don’t know what she sees in that guy,” he comments, trying to read your lips to see what the argument is about. “I hate that guy,” Chris chimes in, joining his brothers in their watch party.

Matt hums in agreement, not wanting to say too much in regard to the situation. He can only assume that you did something Mike didn’t like and now you’re getting in trouble for it. The conversation seems to get heated enough for you to storm off, making your way towards the triplets. “Oh shhh- she’s coming, she’s coming,” Chris warns, trying to act casual.

Nick does the same, leaning against the machine closest to him. Matt’s eyes widen, all he can think to do is turn quickly on his heel to face his brothers. They immediately engage in a fake conversation in attempt to convince you that they weren’t watching. It seems to work.

“Ah yes, McDonalds does have the best chicken nuggets. Good point, Chris,” Nick says as he looks towards his brothers expectantly, but you’re so mad you don’t even notice the ridiculous conversation topic. “Guys you can have my tokens, I’m leaving,” you say, not even introducing yourself with a hello. You pull the tokens out of your pocket, dumping them all in Chris’s hands. He was so excited to have more tokens that he didn’t even care you were leaving.

“Is everything okay?” Matt asks, watching as you hurriedly try to get rid of all your tokens. “No, bro. Stupid Mike, dude. He got mad that I wanted to play so he brought up his ex again, can you believe that?” you scoff, still fishing for more tokens in your pockets. Why was every argument you had with Mike about his ex?

“Gross. Why are you leaving though? You haven’t played a single game,” Nick asks, taking a few tokens from Chris for himself. He and Chris also disliked your boyfriend because you two were always fighting about stupid stuff. But, they weren’t as involved in your love life as Matt was, so they didn’t know how often you two were actually fighting. “Cause he’s my ride and he said he’s leaving,” you grumble, finally looking up from your pockets to look at your friends.

“We can take you home,” Matt suggests, not wanting you to leave just yet. He says it so quickly and eagerly that his brothers give him a weird look, he catches it and coughs awkwardly. “I mean, if you want to stay,” he mumbles in an attempt not to seem so desperate.

You look between your friends and the arcade entrance, trying to decide whether you should stay or go. Matt bites his tongue, trying to prevent himself from saying something he’ll later regret. He wants to grab you by the shoulders and scream that you should just leave that stupid loser.

“I don’t know, it’s getting late,” you attempt to reason as you check your phone for the time. It was only 5pm, but your heart really wanted to follow Mike before he decided he was done with you for real. Upon checking the time, you see a message from Mike that made your stomach turn.

Mike: I left. have fun with your friends. we’re done.

Matt watches as your expression completely drops, you look like you just got the life sucked out of you. “Did he leave?” Matt asks softly, not trying to upset you more than you already were. You shove your phone into you pocket and put on a fake smile, ignoring his question. “It’s only 5, we got time,” you say excitedly, trying to pretend like you didn’t just receive the most heart breaking message ever.

Nick and Chris don’t know any better, so they immediately perk up at this and drag you back into the arcade. Matt, on the other hand, can read you like the back of his hand. He sees how your shoulders slump and how a frown replaces your smile when you think no one’s looking.

Throughout the whole night he wants to scream out, ‘you can be with me now!’ But he knows that you’re not ready, maybe you’ll never be ready. And that, to Matt, is so frustrating.

—

For the rest of the night the boys work towards distracting you from Mike. They use your tokens to win as many games as possible. Matt is focused primarily on convincing you you should leave Mike for good this time. He watches as you attempt to get the basketball into the net as he says, “I’m just saying, you’d be much happier without that guy.”

You fumble with the basketballs in front of you, missing each shot terribly, but welcoming the distraction from the conversation Matt was trying to have. He watches as you roll your eyes and continuing trying to play the game, “tell me one good thing he’s done.” This statement catches you off guard, you’re sure that Mike is a good guy, but for some reason you can’t think of a single good thing he’s done.

You scoff at Matt, throwing the last basketball at the net only for it to hit the rim and fall out. “He does a lot of good things,” you reply annoyed, watching as the machine disperses your tickets. All you earned from this game was 8 tickets considering you missed more than half the shots. “Okay, then name one,” he retorts, ready to challenge you whether you liked it or not. Your mind is racing trying to think of one good thing Mike has done that Matt would find valid, but you still can’t think of one.

Annoyed, you snatch the tickets from the machine, accidentally tearing the last one in half in the process. Matt watches you, noticing how the frustration seems to get the best of you. He knows you won’t be able to think of a single good thing Mike has done, especially not after he ditched you here to fend for yourself. “See, you can’t even think of one. He treats you so bad, y/n. You don’t deserve that, you deserve someone who’ll treat you right,” Matt says, the both of you walking in the direction where you last saw Nick and Chris.

“Oh yeah? Who would that someone be?” you retort, looking around the entire arcade in search of Nick and Chris. You desperately needed to find them so they could serve as a buffer between you and Matt right now. He was asking too many uncomfortable questions and honestly was starting to push your buttons, he doesn’t know Mike like you do. “I mean, I’ve always treated you right,” Matt’s reply is so bold that it even catches him by surprise, what the hell was he even saying right now? He knew he was setting himself up for heartbreak and the friendzone, but he couldn’t stop himself from saying it.

You look at him briefly, a little shocked that he’d even say that. I mean, you two have been best friends for so long that a relationship with Matt would be like dating a brother. The thought is weird, but you don’t want to offend him, “yeah, but you’re my best friend. Friends are supposed to be nice to each other.” Each time you say friend it feels like a stab to the heart. He seemed to be stuck in the friendzone again and again.

“Y/n! Matt!” Nick calls out from the ticket machine, both he and Chris feeding their tickets into it. You perk up at the sight of them and walk over immediately You feel a wave of relief wash over you when you see them, finally you’ll be able to escape this awkward situation Matt put you in. Matt can’t help but feel sad, but he tries not to show it.

“We’re gonna get a remote control car!” Chris says excitedly, referring to the prize they were going to cash in for using all their tickets. Without another word he takes all yours and Matt’s tickets so he can feed them into the machine. You chuckle at this, finding it amusing.

Matt offers a small smile.

—

After redeeming your prizes, the four of you decided it was time to head home. You picked out a giant plushie while the three of them combined their tickets for Chris’s remote control car.

Matt pulled up to you house reluctantly, wishing he could kidnap you and take you to their house once he saw Mike’s car parked outside. “Mike’s home?” Chris asks you casually as soon as Matt places the car in park. “Yeah, guess so,” you reply as you unbuckle yourself, trying not to sound too excited. Deep down you were bubbling with emotions, mostly happiness because if Mike is home that means he’s definitely not done with your relationship.

“Bye guys, I had so much fun!” you dismiss yourself eagerly, all you want to do is go inside and reconcile with your boyfriend. Nick and Chris bid you goodbye but Matt stays silent, he doesn’t want you to leave. You hug Nick in the back seat and pat Chris’s shoulder as you open the car door. You offer Matt a small, awkward smile before grabbing your plushie and hopping out of the car.

Matt feels so defeated, if he weren’t such a pushover when it came to you he’d tell you the truth. The truth is that Mike is leading you on, playing with your feelings, abusing of emotions, and flaunting you around like a trophy when he feels like it. The truth is that Matt is in love with you and has been since the first time he saw you, but he’s too scared to ruin your friendship to admit it.

Matt watches as you walk up to your front door, plushie tucked under your arm. There’s an eager pep in your step that makes Matt want to throw up. Chris is scrolling through his phone, forgetting about you as soon as got off the car. Nick is watching Matt, confused as to why he looks so sad. “Are we gonna move? I’m fucking hungry, dude,” Chris groans from the passenger seat, throwing his head back dramatically against the car seat.

You were inside already, but Matt stayed outside your house and watched as the lights in your house turned on one by one. He knew you were searching the house like a madwoman for Mike. “Can you drive?!” Nick chimes in, grabbing Matt by the shoulder to break him from his daze. Matt’s eyes remain trained on your bedroom window, watching as the light turns on and your shadow comes into view as he responds, “yeah, sorry.”

He puts the car in drive, slowly letting the car roll down the street. Matt’s breath hitches as Mike’s shadow comes into view, he’s praying that you’ll just run out of the house and back into the car. The car is slowly rolling down the street, Matt’s foot hovering over the break in an attempt to slow the car down even more. Your shadow and Mike’s meet for a hug and soon enough you’re kissing. Matt’s foot slams on the break suddenly causing the car to jolt forward, he knew it was coming but it didn’t hurt any less.

“What the fuck Matt?!” Chris exclaims, looking up at Matt in bewilderment. The seatbelt was choking him slightly and his phone flew off his lap. Nick’s head hit the front seat headrest slightly, causing him to gasp in surprise. “Matt what the actual fuck are you doing?!” Nick yelled, meeting Matt’s eyes through the rearview mirror.

There was no way Matt was about to admit that he was watching you through your window. So, he made up the quickest lie he could think of, “Sorry. I got a cramp.” He offered both his brothers a fake smile in hopes that they’d believe his lie. It seemed to satisfy them seeing as they rolled their eyes and returned to their phones. Matt took his foot off the break, looking back at your house one last time.

The lights were off.

—

Matt doesn’t hear from you until two days later. You called him at 12pm, which was completely uncommon for you to do. You were usually calling him at 12am, breaking him from his deep sleep to rant about Mike.

“Hello?” Matt answers the phone immediately, if this is another call about Mike and his stupid actions he’s ready to be honest this time. “You busy?” You ask, propping the phone between your shoulder and your face so you can freely look through the racks of clothing in front of you.

Matt examines his surrounding, trying to decide whether he’s truly busy or not. He’s not. “Mmm not really. Why?” He asks, getting up from his spot on the couch and walking over to his room. He hears the metal hangers scraping against the clothings racks in the background before you reply, “wanted to see if you were down for lunch.”

This was the first time you’d asked him to hang out since dating Mike. He couldn’t fight the smile that grew on his face. “Just you and me or Nick and Chris too,” he needed to sound casual, but he was kicking himself for even mentioning Nick and Chris. What if you said yes to inviting them and his time alone with you turned into a group hangout?

“Up to you, I was hoping for it just to be us,” you reply, picking a shirt off the rack. You examine it carefully as you try imagining yourself in it. You decide you don’t like it and put it back. Matt is doing a silent happy dance on the other side of the phone, he feels like this is his chance to tell you the truth. Plus, you don’t seem to be upset with Mike which means that the conversation probably won’t revolve entirely around that loser.

Matt calms himself down, taking a deep breath before replying, “Cool yeah. Should I meet you somewhere?” He’s trying to act casual, but there is no such thing as casual for Matt when it involves you. “You can. Or I can pick you up?” You reply, walking out of the store and to your car. You walk the street cautiously, thanking the people who let you pass with a small hand wave. For you, this conversation really was normal. Just a friend asking another friend to go out to lunch.

For Matt, this conversation felt like the beginning of something new. A new relationship with you, a new attempt at admitting his feelings, even a new outlook on life. He felt positive. “Yeah that works. Are you close?” He has the biggest smile on his face as he looks through his closet for the perfect outfit.

“I’m like 10 minutes away,” you say mindlessly, pausing as you dig through your purse for your keys. “I’ll let you know when I’m there, okay? Love you, friend,” you finished saying once you found your keys and unlocking your car.

There was that word again. Friend. It made Matt shudder, but he tries ignoring it. He wasn’t going to let that sour his mood. “Alright, bye. Love you too,” he replies, but he means it. He intentionally doesn’t call you friend in hopes that you’ll take the hint.

All you do is hum in response and hang up. It breaks Matt’s heart, but he ignores it.

—

You pick Matt up, arriving to his house exactly 10 minutes later. The two of you decide on a restaurant, engaging in light conversation throughout your meal. Matt couldn’t find the courage to confess to you, especially not with the thought of Mike looming over him.

Matt felt incredibly anxious, his mind racing uncontrollably with all the possible outcomes of tonight. He could confess and it could go one of two ways, you could feel the same or you could reject him for Mike like all the times before. Or he could keep it to himself and remain in the friendzone forever.

The two of you are now walking back to your car, ready to call it a night. “Thanks for coming out with me,” you say with a smile as you hop into the drivers seat. Matt follows suit, getting into the passenger side before replying, “of course, anything for you.” The comment was simple, but it had so many underlying messages that he wished you’d pick up on. ‘Anything for you.’

You seem to pick up some sort of message because you reply with a chuckle, “you’re always saying sappy stuff like that Matt.” He gulps nervously, was this his chance? You start the car, the radio playing dully in the background. The noise replaces the previous silence, only adding to his own frustration, especially because he hated this song. He couldn’t decide whether to do it or not.

“I hate this song,” you mumble, changing the station to another song quickly. He takes this as a sign, a sign to just bite the bullet and spill it all. He needs to start off slow though, if he’s too abrasive it’ll scare you, “so, how are you and Mike doing?”

You two hadn’t spoken about Mike the entire night and for good reason too. The night you got back from the arcade he made a bunch of empty promises, adding in a bunch of fake apologies in between. You, of course, ended up forgiving him only for him to mess up again the next day. So, you decided you were finally done with him and broke up with him for good. Usually when you two would break up you’d allow him back into your life within hours, but this time you blocked him on everything and forced him to move out. Today was your first day as a truly single woman and it felt like a breath of fresh air. You were repulsed by men and decided you were going to be single for a while.

“We broke up actually,” you say calmly, making a long story short. Matt knew all the details of your previous arguments with Mike so there was no point in explaining the obvious. He’s in shock, actually in shock. This is the first time you’ve ‘broken’ up with Mike and weren’t completely hysterical about it.

“When did this happen?!”

You turn the corner onto Matt’s street, nearing his house slowly. “Yesterday morning. I kicked him out and he’s coming for the rest of his stuff tomorrow,” you say like it was the most normal thing ever. How were you so calm? So casual?

Mike moving out was the best news ever, that means that it’s real this time. “Wow. How are you?” he asks. He needs to test the waters before diving head first, especially if he’s going to confess something so important.

“I’m okay. Honestly, I’m not as sad as I thought I’d be. I’m just ready to be single,” you reply, placing the car in park in front of his house. He digests the information, trying to come to terms with the fact that you want to be single. “Right now I’m repulsed at the thought of men. I’m just so done crying over guys, you know? I’m ready to just hang out with my friends and be free.”

“I’m a man. Are you repulsed at the thought of me?” Matt asks in an attempt to make light of the information you just dumped on him. He’s trying not to freak out right now. “No, dude! I mean like men that I’d date. You’re my best friend, it’s different,” you reply, the words cutting into Matt. Everything you just said felt like an insult.

The car is filled with an awkward silence, neither of you know what to say after that. The same song from earlier plays, the song you hate and suddenly it feels more like a bad omen to Matt. You cough in an attempt to break the tension, but Matt remains silent, he feels like he can’t breathe right now.

“Well I had fun today, Matt,” you finally say, unlocking the car so he can use it as an excuse to escape this situation. You don’t know why the conversation suddenly became so awkward, all you know is that this felt weird and you didn’t want to sit in it for longer than you had to.

“Me too,” he replies meekly, struggling to unbuckle himself. “Here let me help,” you offer, reaching towards his seat to help him with the buckle. It all becomes too much as he pushes your hand away, “stop. I got it.” You look at him in shock. What was his problem?

Before you can comment on his behavior, he opens the car door and stumbles out. He can’t seem to leave this situation fast enough. You watch in confusion as he walks into his house without another word. You are worried, but decide he’s just being dramatic and drive off.

Once he’s inside he feels the emotions intensify as he immediately collapses onto the floor. He’s out of breath and his head is ringing with the words you said, ‘No dude! I mean like men that I’d date. You’re my best friend, it’s different.’ He’s hyperventilating at this point, the tears flowing uncontrollably down his face as heaves in an attempt to catch his breath.

Nick and Chris who were in the living room hear this and immediately bolt towards Matt. “Matt? What’s wrong?” Chris asks frantically, getting on his knees to be eye level with his brother. Matt doesn’t respond, instead he grabs onto his Chris and pulls him in for a hug and sobs into his shoulder. He’s desperate for comfort, but nothing seems like enough. Chris understands what his brother needs, holding him tightly in an attempt to console him.

“He’s having a panic attack, let’s take him to his room,” Nick says equally as frantic, squatting in front of his two brothers so he can rub Matt’s back. Chris and Nick attempt to pick Matt up, but he’s glued to the floor, still holding on to Chris for dear life.

“It’s okay buddy, I got you,” Chris says calmly, not wanting to escalate the situation any further. Matt continues to cry, allowing his brothers to comfort him. “Deep breaths, Matt. Deep breaths,” Chris instructs, pulling Matt off of him slightly so he can get it together. Matt nods his head, using all his will power to stop crying and focus on his breathing. Finally, he’s able to calm down and his sobbing is reduced to sniffles.

“Wanna talk about it?” Nick asks lovingly, sitting next to Matt on the floor and rubbing more circles onto his back. “No,” Matt replies, his voice hoarse from all the crying. He looks down at his hands and plays with his rings to occupy his mind. “That’s okay, we’re here for you when you’re ready,” Chris chimes in, taking a seat on the other side of Matt. He rests his head on Matt’s shoulder, patting his thigh to signify that he’s willing to sit here with him for as long as necessary.

“Thanks,” Matt replies sadly, resting his head against the wall behind him. He’s never felt as defeated as he does right now. He’s stuck in the friendzone again and again.

—

MASTERLIST

A/n:

Honestly such a great request, but I had to keep re-listening to the song to write a story as accurate as possible to it. That’s why there’s no happy ending because the song clearly states that he’s stuck in the friendzone again and again, but I’m willing to do a pt.2 with a happy ending or just a diff outcome. Hope you enjoy.

Also, I’ll be expecting the foot

- L.A.M.B👼🏻💗

[s-sturn]

𖥔 SLUT!

summary: Matt ends up reuniting with his ex-girlfriend, making some feelings come back to the surface, but he was already dating Y/N.

warnings: cheating, kissing, sad, crying, ANGSTT!, there’s no happy ending, cursing, threats!!

part 2 (coming soon…)

masterlist!

THIRD PERSON POV

Matt walked the streets of Boston, taking Trevor for a walk.

He hummed small songs, until he bumped into someone very recognisable, Leah, his ex-girlfriend.

The brunette was in a relationship, but the feelings his heart felt when he hit his eyes on the blonde-haired girl was an emotion he never felt with Y/N.

The two started talking a lot, exchanged numbers and scheduled to leave to see each other again. As the week Y/N went by, he realized that Matt was on his phone a lot, laughing, and ended up forgetting his own girlfriend.

The brunette felt upset during the days she saw seeing Matt, who practically didn't care about Y/N. As the weeks went by, Matt started to leave the house a lot, something that was not normal for the boy, after all he hated to leave the house.

The light-eyed boy never let Y/N, who was his own girlfriend touch his phone again, which made the girl very suspicious of it, after all, Matt was never like that.

This weekend, Y/N would go again to the house of the triplets, at this time the brunette and Chris were extremely close, and this was good for the girl who overnight stopped receiving attention from her boyfriend, who before wiped her tears and today is the cause of them.

Matt had invited Leah to go to the boy’s house, which was dangerous, but the two did the same way.

The blonde entered hidden inside the triplet house, the fact was that Matt forgot that Y/N would also be there. As always, Y/N went up the stairs going to greet her boyfriend, if she could call him that. But when he opens the door he is faced with the scene that broke his heart, Matt kissed his ex-girlfriend on his bed.

━━ What the fuck is that? ━━ Y/N's voice came out crying, while the girl looked disappointed at the boy, as well as his brothers.

━━ Y/N! Fuck! I can explain! ━━ Matt quickly walked away from Leah running after Y/N but his brothers tried to stop him

━━ Explain what? That you were kissing your ex? I've already seen that! ━━ Y/N's eyes teared as she tried her best to hold back the tears that threatened to fall.

━━ Slut, didn't you see that you got in the way of my moment with my future boyfriend? ━━ The girl with blonde hair mocked.

━━ Bitch, go fuck yourself and shut up your rotten mouth. ━━ Nick told Leah totally angry with her and Matt.

I leave the house quickly, hiding the tears that finally fell, Matt ran after me calling me, I just ignored him going away to never look him in the face again.

A few weeks after the breakup, Matt and Leah finally took over the return of their relationship, which broke my heart.

Soon I get a message from Chris, asking if I would like to go to the ice cream parlor with him, which I am afraid of, but I end up accepting.

We spent the day having fun, and I ended up being distracted for a few moments about everything that was happening.

A few minutes after I arrive at my apartment, I see the publication of a gossip page, saying that after Matt takes over his relationship with Leah, Chris appears in an ice cream parlor next to me.

I opened the comments of the publication coming across several people cursing me as a slut, whore and even home destroyer, saying that Matt separated from Leah because of me and that now Chris and Matt have moved away because of me too.

I opened my dm, coming at threats from several people, calling me a traitor, without me having done anything.

That killed me once and for all, that I'm literally being hated, for having liked a boy.

tell me who I am, guess I don’t have a choice

all because I liked a boy.

taglist.

@junnniiieee07

answer this post if u want to be in my taglist!

[sturniololuv3r]

Can you do a similar fic to the you just did but instead of Nate dying he’s in the hospital and there is a happy ending

“Please wake up”

You didn’t even remember what started the argument. Something stupid. Something small. But it escalated fast, too fast.

Nate had raised his voice. So had you.

“You don’t even care!” you’d screamed, eyes brimming with tears. “You never fight for me, you just leave!”

He looked like you’d slapped him. “You seriously think I don’t care?”

You didn’t answer fast enough. Or maybe you did.

“Maybe we’re both wasting our time,” he muttered, grabbing his keys.

You chased after him, angry and afraid. “You always run when things get hard.”

He stopped in the doorway. Turned around with eyes filled with pain. “At least I don’t tear people apart just because I’m scared to be loved.”

Then he walked out.

You let him go.

⸻

You were still shaking when your phone rang. Chris’s name. You almost didn’t answer.

But your world shattered with three words:

“There was an accident.”

⸻

He’d lost control in the rain. Hit a guardrail. The EMTs said he was lucky to be alive.

Now you were sitting in the cold hospital waiting room, wrapped in Matt’s hoodie, hands trembling in your lap. You kept replaying the fight. Every word. Every awful, sharp syllable.

“I didn’t mean it,” you whispered into your palms. “God, please—just let him wake up.”

Nick sat beside you, resting his arm around your shoulders. “He’s gonna be okay.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do. It’s Nate. He’s stubborn as hell.”

You laughed, just barely. It faded into a quiet sob.

Chris came back from talking with the nurse. “They said we can go in. One at a time.”

You stood instantly. “Me first.”

⸻

The beeping of machines filled the room, steady and terrifying.

Nate looked pale. Bruised. Tubes and wires made him seem fragile—something Nate had never been.

You sat by the edge of the bed and grabbed his hand gently, threading your fingers through his.

“I’m so sorry,” you whispered. “For the fight. For what I said. For letting you leave like that.”

You laid your forehead against his arm. “I love you. Even when I’m mad. Even when I’m messy. I need you to wake up so I can say it when you’re actually awake.”

A tear slid down your cheek.

“I don’t care about the argument. I just want you to come back to me.”

Silence. Beep. Beep. Beep.

And then—his fingers twitched.

You sat up fast. “Nate?”

He blinked slowly, groaning faintly. “…Ow.”

A broken laugh slipped from your mouth. “Oh my God.”

His eyes fluttered open. Barely. But they were open.

“Hey,” you whispered. “You’re okay.”

He looked around, confused. Then his eyes met yours. “You’re crying.”

“You’re alive,” you choked out, laughing through the tears. “You idiot, you scared me so bad.”

“I crashed?” he mumbled.

You nodded, squeezing his hand. “Yeah. But you’re okay now. And we’re okay. I promise.”

He gave the faintest smile. “I didn’t mean what I said either.”

“I know.”

“I love you.”

You leaned forward, pressing your forehead against his. “I love you more. And I’m never letting you storm off again.”

“Good,” he whispered. “Hospital beds suck.”

⸻

Outside the room, your brothers waited. The second they saw you smiling through your tears, Chris exhaled hard. Matt wiped at his eyes. Nick muttered, “Told you he’s too stubborn to die.”

You nodded, finally breathing for the first time in hours.

Nate was safe.

You had a second chance.

And you wouldn’t waste it.

[ladypiscesmoon]

I'm still not feeling very well, but I managed to finish the writing up for the year ahead of Matt Bomer and Simon Halls.

I like answering your questions, I will try, but please remember:

1: I'm still on the mend, so I'm not a lot on here at the moment. In other words be patient. Some of you are pushing a lot.

2: Tarot isn't an exact science. A lot of it is me pulling the cards and interpreting it. Some of you sometimes seem to think I'm a mindreader for all the people I do readings for, but that's not how it works. Sometimes I just don't know much more, or I would have written it down. I don't always know what they feel all the time, and I certainly do not pretend to know these people.

Year ahead Matt Bomer& Simon Halls

What do they have to release from 2024:

Transform old situations into new possibilities: Let go of the past and become the present It's time to examine beliefs that no longer serve them. What they had, is no longer the same. They shouldn't let those beliefs (or habits) hold them back. If they're clinging too much to the old, they can't welcome something new. it's also a card about letting go. I think in this moment it's Simon that is not letting go and Matt's afraid to move on. They both have to let it happen, the marriage has ran its course. Make your life more interesting: explore the unexpected Leave the easy road behind (the old life). It is an easy option not to try something new, and it's safe to hide behind what they know. Especially Matt should follow his passion, but we've seen that already in his year ahead. There's more to life than stifling routines, even if it seems the safer option. Stand up for your beliefs: the time to act is now Don't let someone else take charge of your life. Choose where you stand and speck up about what you truly want. In this marriage I feel Matt has often hold his tongue. Maybe because Simon is older, and Matt was young when he married him.

2025 Feeling:

Simon: Not today (not dealing, hurt, avoiding a conversation/call/person, boundaries, still angry) Clock: need time, takes time, in time, cycles; es, time to heal, progress Karmic relationship (feeling, triggers, turmoil, resentment, lessons, letting go and loving you) Girl with a snake (empathy and narcissist paradigm, being charmed or used, enable, boundaries) Thoughts: It's difficult for Simon to let Matt go. He has always be in control in the relationship and suddenly Matt is trying to break out of the mold of being the most empathetic. He used to have a lot of leverage when it came to charming Matt, but that's not the case anymore. He has been stalling and avoiding the hard conversations. He's hurt and needs some time to progress what it will mean that Matt wants to move on from him. But I feel deep down he knows it's inevitable Matt: Abundance (keep a positive mindset, manifest exactly what you want, gratitude, bliss) Lightning (sudden change, shocking news, surprise, epiphany, upheaval, transformation) Coffee cup (meeting and conversing, savoring the moment, feeling uplifted, friendship Healthy choices (making healthy choices in love and in life, self-love, self-care, feeling happier) Thoughts: Matt's manifesting what he really wants. Trying to choose himself and getting the difficult conversations out of the way. I do feel they will talk about it this year and hopefully come to the same conclusion. They could try to be friends, also for the sake of the children.

Light/Shadow Tarot

Matt: The wheel of fortune/the hanged man/10 of pentacles With the hanged man I do think Matt is processing everything still, but at least he knows that he has to release his old ways of thinking. He has to take action if he doesn't want to be stuck for the rest of his life. He does want to have a long-term happiness in his love life, and it means he has to let go of the marriage. If Matt was a different person, I think it would have happened last year or maybe even the year before. But here we are. Simon: 2 of wands/the emperor/3 of swords To me the two of wands say that Simon is clinging to this marriage, trying to make it work in any way possible. This has to do with the next card as well; the emperor. He likes to be in control, a provider and a leader this makes him feel he isn't. It's not the first time I have pulled control when I read Simon. He feels often a bit as overbearing, too much. Also, he likes the status of them together as an icon for the LGBTQIA+ community. Also, I haven't read in- depth for him, but I do think he comes with some baggage.

Month for Month January The devil reversed (release, independence, reclaiming power) Self-indulgence (self-worth&value, time to heal, shadow work, self appreciation) Worth waiting for (divine timing is at work in your love life) Go with the flow, release the past. Clinging to it in an effort to relive isn't useful. It's time to choose your own self-worth. Bothe of them have to go within and work on themselves. They will find other love again, when it's the right time. February 8 of cups reversed (stagnation, clinginess, fear of moving on) Cut down (cutting out, separation, stop the pattern, silent treatment) Past-life relationship ( you have known each other before) Not letting go causes stagnation and that isn't good for either of them. They should stop their old pattern. Sulking and the silent-treatment are ways of getting someone to do what you want, but it is no longer enough to hold the other back. Their's is a past-life connection, they are in each other's life to learn from each other, but it has served its purpose now. March 5 of wands reversed (compromise, ending the battle, calm your temper) Addiction (codependent, obsession&restraint, possession& control, emotional block) Let your friends help you (ask for and accept support from others) Try to compromise for the sake of your family also. Simon trying to hold on with control and Matt being codependent isn't helping either of them. Ask for help from your friends, or a therapist and talk about your feelings. April Queen of swords reversed (pessimistic, poor communication, manipulative) Ship (cutting ties, moving on, receive what you need, progression&arriving) Express your love (go ahead and make the romantic gesture) Still not a great month. They seem to go a bit forward and then two steps back again. Matt is trying to cut the ties. H'e also going to express his love for someone May 7 of cups reversed (lack of options, avoiding issues, reality check) Mirror (mirroring each other, self-reflection, introspection, inner wounds) Separation (time apart from your partner is on the horizon) Time apart from each other will happen soon. They both need it to get a better perspective about their relationship or they will stay stuck in that same cycle June The sun reversed (pessimism, blind to the truth, negativity) Grounding (stability&security, performance, growth&endurance) Engagement (your love life is ascending to a higher level of commitment) One of them is moving forward, one of them is stubborn and still fighting. One of them is involved/ in love with someone else July The world reversed (emptiness, stagnation, delays) Back stabbing (heartbreak&pain, separation&loss, deception&lies, shocking attack) Children (your love is affected by children) One of them is feeling betrayed, their conversations are also very hard because of their children August Queen of coins (mature, successful, practical) Healthy choices (self-love&self-care, being happier, love&life) Give your relationship a chance (work on your partnership) Trying to take healthy mature decisions. Working on their partnership for the children.

September Moon reversed (confusion, fear, self deception) The runner (fear of intimacy, running away, intensity&letting go, turmoil&fleeting) Very soon (clearly decide what you want so that it comes to you now) A bit of the same, basically. Trying to work their separation out, and having many obstacles October 5 of swords (surrender, defiant, the cost of battle) The snake (competition& enemy, the other woman, look over your shoulder) True love ( this is the romance of a lifetime) Making some progress and arrangements. Their life and work life is also entangled for a long time and it takes time to agree about it. Not sure but I feel Matt will loose money. November The hermit (soul searching, solitude, contemplation) Not enough (lacking confidence, self-sabotage, ego&fear, frustrations) Forgive and learning (as you release and heal the past, you experience more love in your present moments) Taking time to do some soul searching, to heal and to be happy again. Forgive each other for some things in the past December 10 of wands (burn-out, uphill battle, taken for granted) Date (get back out there, meeting someone new, setting a date, date online) Chemistry (there's a strong magnetic attraction here) Opportunity for growth and new love. It could be that Simon is meeting someone new. Sometimes feeling both they’re fighting a uphill battle but trying to find a way to communicate properly

Overall 2025: Lenormand

Scythe (quick endings, cuts, accidents, something being cut out, the unexpected, a warning, death, scissors, a scythe.) Fox (job, work, slyness, flyness, trickery, competitors, cunning, originality, creativity, fraud, con artists) Anchor (settling down, security, stability) Rider (news, messages, what approaches, what is leaving, a younger sportive person) Tower (Authority, government, politics, organizations, standing out, standing alone, isolation, independence, buildings, towers) Cross (burdens, struggles, suffering, crosses we bear, pain, sacrifices, religion, symbolism, fate, destiny, the cross) Bear (authority figures, bosses, parents, personal finances, strength, power, heavy, lifestyle, force, bears) Key (significance, that which is important, what needs to be paid attention to, that which is urgent, what needs to be opened up, what needs to be locked away, keys) Dog (Friends, loyalty, respect, confidants, followers, pets)

Combinations and Thoughts:

-The end of a relationship; quick ending -Ending it with someone after you discover they are not as they appear to be -Risking your stability, warnings about your security, deciding to stay where you are (even when you shouldn’t). -The Rider can represent a new lover, news for someone you’re in a relationship with (or will be in the future) -Rider is associated with things which happen very soon – if you’re waiting on someone, they are on their way! Sometimes, Rider can predict that events will play out in one week, one month, one year, or on the 1st of the month.  -Mail for the government, a letter from the government -News which causes your seeker a burden, information which is critical -You will feel distant from your partner. Perhaps your lover is unreliable -Controlling your pain -The interference of family members in your relationship -Important matter, important influence -Powerful allies, accumulating support, protecting your friends -Consent to complying

In this year there are a few things to unpack; I feel the distance between Matt and Simon, Matt wanting to abandon what used to be a stable relationship (but doesn't feel like one anymore). Matt thinking he should go, but hesitating and overstaying. Friends or family talking with both of them about what they want. Both feeling pain because they feel it has run its course. In the end someone complying. I do think that this will be Simon, because from what I picked up, I don't think he wants this marriage ending.

Messages: Matt: I hope that someday you will forgive me I use my work as a way to move on from you I want to feel that way again I lost myself for a little while There is someone else Simon: I can't seem to forget you I wish things were different I'm too afraid to talk I worry about us a lot

This concludes the reading (ask away, if you feel inclined)

*This reading is alleged/for entertainment purposes only*

[joey-burrow]

Crushing On You

Elly De La Cruz x Reader

Requested: No

Warning: Some smut

You and Matt McLain have been friends since you both were kids and had grown up together. You had gotten a great job offer in Cincinnati so you took it. That had split you guys up but still talked on the phone when neither of you were busy. A couple years later Matt got picked up from the Reds. When he started playing there he met and got really close with Elly De La Cruz. Sometimes when the two of them hungout outside of practices and games, Matt invited you to come hangout with them. You always loved to hang out with them so you went every time you got invited. The more you hung out with them, the more Elly was developing a crush on you. The deeper his love got for you, the more nervous and quiet he got around you. Elly was too scared to say anything to Matt because he knew you and him were close and was afraid Matt was going to say something about it to you so he kept his mouth shut about it.

During this past off season, Elly got the courage to ask you if you wanted to come back to his hometown with him. You of course said yes. He was shocked but also excited that he got to show you around the Dominican Republic. Luckily the job you have, you have the choice of working from home or from the office, just as long as you have internet connection. You stayed down there with Elly in his hometown during the whole off season while working. You and Elly were sadly at your last full day on being in the Dominican Republic before having to fly back to Cincinnati the next day. You were excited to go back home but you were sad leaving while you had such a blast in Elly’s hometown meeting his family and old friends.

Your last day there, Elly wanted to take you down to where he played baseball as a kid since he didn’t get to show you yet. It wasn’t too far from where you guys were so just the two of you walked over. You both stood there for a minute and admired it while leaning against the fence before Elly spoke up. “Can I talk to you about something?” He asked. “Of course.” You said looking at him. You could tell that he was super nervous with what he was about to say. He took a deep breath before speaking. “Listen. I’ve had a blast while we were here and happy I got to bring you with me. I’m glad we got to get even closer than before.” He paused for a moment. You had a feeling you knew where he was going with this. “I’m grateful that you’re in my life and hope you’re in it for life. What I’m trying to get at is” he took a deep breath before continuing while facing you. You faced him too. “I’ve had the biggest crush on you since I met you. You’re just so amazing and gorgeous and seeing the way you’ve played with the kids around here makes me fall even more in love with you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you be my girlfriend?” He said while scratching the back of his neck. You started to tear up during his speech and had to admit that you had developed a huge crush on him while you guys were there. “Awe Elly. Oh I would love to be your girlfriend.” You said while chuckling. He chuckled back with a sigh of relief and leaned in for a deep kiss. “To be honest, this entire time we’ve been here I developed a huge crush on you and glad you asked me out.” You said smiling.

You both walked back to his parents house and as soon as you guys walked in and took your shoes off, “Elly, did you ask her?” His dad asked referring to if he asked you to be his girlfriend. His whole family was looking at you guys for an answer now. He smiled and put his arm around you. “Yes I asked and she said yes.” He said smiling ear to ear. They all got excited. “Thank god. He wouldn’t stop talking about it when you weren’t in the room.” Elly’s dad said to you. You could see Elly blushing when you looked up at him. You chuckled at the comment and Elly took your hand while leading you up to his room. You both knew that you guys didn’t have much alone time before one of his family members barged into the room needing one of you for something. He sat on his bed while pulling you into his lap. You put each leg on each side of him. You both stared into each others eyes. “I love you” he said. “I love you too” you said smiling. He pulled you in for a kiss, you both started to make out. You felt him become hard below you that it made you wet. You both smiled in the kiss and you moaned. Him hearing you moan into the kiss made him more hard. While you guys were getting heated, there was a knock at the bedroom door. You both pulled away as his mom opened the door. Since you were sitting on his lap, you were covering his hard on. “What do you guys want for dinner?” She asked. You both shrugged, “we’re fine with whatever you want to make mom” he said. “Okay. Love you both” she said while shutting the door. “Love you too” you both said in unison. You guys got back to what you guys were doing before getting interrupted.

You stood up for a moment so you both can remove each others pants and underwear. You helped each other take the others shirt off. He moaned at the sight of you not wearing a bra. You even moaned at how big he is. You went to sit back on top of him while inserting him into you. You both moaned at the feeling. “Fuck you feel amazing around me baby.” He moaned quietly in your ear while your bouncing up and down on him. You both were trying to be quiet so his family wouldn’t hear you both. He slowly pulled you off him and flipped you both over before reinserting himself into you. “God, you feel so amazing baby” you moaned quietly. He hit your sweet spot with every thrust and you were trying hard not to moan so loud. You bit his shoulder so you can stay quiet. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum” he moaned. Him moaning that set you off too. “Me too. Cum for me.” You moaned in his ear. You came first around him then he pulled out and came on your stomach. He got a nearby towel and wiped you both down. He put his underwear and pants back on while laying next to you. You laid there for a couple minutes before getting your clothes back on. You both laid there on his bed and cuddled until his mom yelled for you both that dinner was ready.

You both got up and headed downstairs to eat. While everyone was eating, his dad looked up at you and Elly and smiled. You both smiled back then looked at each other smiling. Elly’s dad was happy that you guys are finally together and knows that in his heart that you both are going to spend the rest of your lives together. His whole family was very happy that you’re now part of the family. The next day when you both arrived back in Cincinnati, you FaceTimed your family while headed back to your car at the airport and told them about you and Elly. They got very excited and happy that Elly is part of your family now. You guys got back to your car after hanging up with your family and drove back to Elly’s place. When you guys got home, you guys dropped your bags inside the door and went to bed since you guys had a long flight.