#beware: a vent

[dirthe]

a question, or rather, a dragon age centric vent (not negative on the behalf of da, surprisingly)

is it common to feel immense shame regarding love of dragon age — I look at all of the writing and artwork I have left abandoned and know it's not for lack of drive, but for fear of sharing it. poor, critically unstable health has made me more sensitive to the perception of my artwork. I have so little time, so little energy to make it outside of owed client and commercial work ; but when it comes to dragon age, specifically, I find it's an artificial hindrance. people talk about the series as if it is a deeply personal trigger ; "the worst fandom," as it's been named (and perhaps rightfully so, but after years in ffxiv, I beg to differ or at least contest) and it keeps me quiet. to exist feels like stepping on toes, but I know that my transformative, oft-transgressive take on the series would be a personal comfort if I embraced it more fully.

me and my partner have a rich, luscious worldbuild that revolves around our inquisitors. it overlaps and includes the worldbuilding I have had for 5-10+ years for my other elven characters (verrot, namely, and the mattokian) ; and yet I feel embarrassed caring so deeply about it. so much so it's been 6+ months and I have yet to draw a completed illustration of simultas. I apologize every time I reference dragon age on twitter and bluesky. I mean, I made this account to quarantine my thoughts.

to me, this becomes especially offensive when I realize that dragon age is a fantasy series with one of the most overt representations of indigenous-coded elves (for better or for worse, but it's mostly non-natives that react so aggressively). being native, having native characters, has always been important to me. and it upsets me that it's not fans of the franchise that have made me feel bad (compared to ffxiv, bg3) but people who make it a point to tell you how they used to love it, but do so no longer. it feels like one of the most socially acceptable franchises to belittle someone over. for years, I thought the games were textually, factually bad because every time I talked about wanting to play them, 50+ former fans would tell me how terrible they + the community were. and I'm realizing it's no worse than any other fandom. it's definitely put a dent in my already enfeebled creativity.

[mechncheese]

Watching all this is bloody hilarious. You’re so scared of the Skystar fans, meanwhile I (A Skystar fan) am just watching all this while eating my M&M’s and enjoying the show. Your paranoia and internal screaming is incredibly entertaining XD

Suffice to say, watching the brain worms infect your mind as you fight back like a protagonist getting possessed is more fun then any TV show I’ve ever watched. I’ve succumbed to the mind control a long time ago, I know how this ends HAHA

PROTAGONIST FIGHTING BACK A POSSESSION IS EXACTLY HOW IT FEELS AND THE AUDIENCE WATCHES WHEN THE ROT TAKES A HOLD OF ME AND I GO UNDER ! Still fighting that possession btw, I am. Still fighting. You know how this ends. And so do I but I am still going to fight it like no tomorrow AND IM SCARED

[jasperyourmutt]

zonked out on the dog bed snoring up a storm. you come over and rub the soft spot on the top of my nose. i let out the most contented sigh

[thebearme]

I got mad so I projected on to Mike

I FUCKING HATE SCAMMERS

[ilmarisart]

Social conditioning is one hell of a drug

we're working through it though

[hyunpic]

[nuppu-nuppu]

Vent post incoming in the tags

[evenceflux18]

Gee thanks for the help dude, This is my online income and you took that advantage...I'm no longer filtering your excuses at this point, you clearly such an opportunist

[atomicpatrolcreation]

My thoughts on Green Lantern: Beware my Power

This idea came to me while my best friend forced me to watch the animated movie Green Lantern: Beware My Power. If you're wondering whether it was a horror for me to sit through that movie, the answer is yes. However, my best friend, Gabby, insisted we watch it together because, according to her, we’d both be happy since it featured John Stewart (her favorite Green Lantern) and Hal (my favorite).

Well, I ended up disliking it a lot, for many reasons. The only things I actually enjoyed were the art, the animation, and the appearances of Hawkgirl, Martian Manhunter, and Green Arrow.

As for the things I didn’t like—there are too many to list here, so I’ll save that for another post. But the main and most important thing is: What the hell were they thinking when they butchered the respect, admiration, and brotherhood between John and Hal?!

One of the best things about the Green Lantern comics is that all the Lanterns are friends/co-workers who act like one big family (most of the time).

Heck, even Guy, in his worst moments (and trust me, he’s had plenty), has always managed to be amicable with other Green Lanterns.

John Stewart has always admired and respected Hal Jordan, and that will never change.

In the comics, if someone badmouths Hal around John, you can bet they’ll end up getting a smack to keep Hal’s name out of their mouth.

My guy doesn’t tolerate anyone—not even freaking Batman—talking down or attacking Hal. And you think he himself would badmouth someone he’s outright called the GREATEST GREEN LANTERN OF ALL TIME?

Sorry, but if you think that would happen, let me tell you: you’re so, so wrong.

John may be a lot of things (and yes, the guy has had his fair share of messy retcons—though not as bad as Guy’s), but one thing he has always been is loyal to his loved ones, and Hal is one of them (just in case anyone wasn’t clear on that).

Honestly, I just want DC to stop making stupid decisions like this movie or the frustrating (albeit well-written) Bruce Timm animated universe. Green Lantern fans don’t need our favorites constantly being compared or put in competitions to determine who’s the best (And frankly, that’s a dumb argument because any fan who’s read a comic in their life knows or should know that Kyle is the best Lantern across the entire emotional spectrum).

Speaking of Kyle, can someone tell me why the hell they gave John almost all of Kyle’s backstory in this movie?

It was completely unnecessary to give KYLE’S STORY to John, especially when John’s story could have delved into the challenges of being an American man who served years in the military (specifically infantry), gets discharged, and decides to focus on architecture.

And let’s not even get started on how they could’ve focused on John being a rookie who trains under Kilowog and Guy, eventually meeting Hal in person, spending time together, and forming a friendship where Hal (sometimes) gives advice and trains with him. This could’ve led to parallels between John/Hal and Hal/Sinestro.

Or, better yet, they could’ve explored the dynamics between John, Guy, and Hal (because those three are so incredibly different in so many ways, it’s wild that they even get along) and how the Guardians (and the rest of the GL Corps) treat them so differently.

Hal was the first human Lantern, the one who had to prove his worth because everyone thought humans (and Earth) were inferior and unfit to serve as Lanterns. The intense bias, alien xenophobia, and pressure he endured are issues that never get addressed in comics, movies, or animated series, and it’s insane.

How did Hal feel when Guy showed up?

Did he realize Guy was a bit of a jerk but still treated better than he was when he first joined?

Did Hal care, or did he just ignore it?

Was he relieved that Guy was a complete idiot, knowing it meant he wouldn’t be overshadowed?

For a moment, did Hal think about his family and how he was projecting those feelings onto the Corps?

And when John joined?

Did Hal notice the difference between them?

Sometimes I wonder about these things, and Beware My Power opened a can of worms I thought had been sealed shut after reading Geoff Johns’ run back in 2011.

And don’t think I enjoy seeing fans compare or fight over these characters. I actually hate it (as I mentioned earlier), and I love how they support, care for, and respect each other.

But sometimes, I really just want them to explore those years before Kyle showed up, before they had the beautiful bond they have now.

Because honestly, Hal has abandonment issues that could easily be explored and expanded upon. These issues explain certain behaviors of his that you can also see reflected in his relationship with the Green Lantern Corps.

P.S. To me, Hal, John, and Guy are like brothers, which is why I picture Hal having “firstborn syndrome” when he stopped being the only human Lantern, projecting his feelings onto them for a brief period.

[the-sprog]

The URGE to write an Aizawa centric fic only to have a conduit for my "cats aren't independent creatures they're pets and they need just as much care as any other" because I'm TIRED of reading people write that he likes cats because they don't bother him and they can take care of themselves.

They can't! They can't take care of themselves!!!!

[vinni-dragon]

Beware or w/e

This person is also a rampant art thief and pathological liar. So that's fun.

[iwillgoon4u]

sick (tw very very angst post. Is so angst it will make you blow up. Beware)

im going to fucking projectile vomit everywhere like I mean really just target-sniper range projectile vomit. I feel like crap one of my irl friends unfriended me and didn’t give me an explanation as to why and I miss my other two friends one I can’t even visit rn and I haven’t drank water in a while and life just sucks right now the only thing I’m looking forward to is a plushie I’ve ordered. Moral of the story kids: asks wont be answered until July 17-18th but feel free to spam them in the mean time

[thepinkhippoinhungryhungryhippos]

the dim green light of your clock shone onto your wet face through the dark. the numbers you saw through your blurry eyes read 2:31.

you lay in bed, tears streaming down your face. you pressed your hands to your ears underneath the blanket. your head felt like it was imploding. you felt like you were imploding in general. your breaths came out fast and strangled.

meltdown. meltdown meltdown meltdown. the more you thought the word, the less of a word it became. you chanted it to yourself like a lullaby.

your blankets dragged across the floor as you got up, hunching like you were elderly and stomping like you were a toddler. you slammed the door as you left.

cold, fresh air hit your face as you took in the silence. the quiet darkness of the garden washed calm over you in waves.

you jumped when you felt cool hands gently clasp over yours. whipping your head around, your eyes met a pair of concerned grey eyes.

"...felix?" you choked out.

his mouth moved, but nothing came out. remembering your hands, you slowly loosened your grip. the world came back into your ears, flooding your senses.

you heard cicadas chirping, water dripping from the drain pipes, leaves rustling in the wind. but most of all, you heard felix.

he brought one of your hands to your face, intertwining his fingers with the other.

"what's wrong?" he whispered, crease forming between his brows.

[im-traumatised]

Should have died so long ago man truly feels like my story ended years past but something glitched and now I'm just still here for no fucking reason lmao

[redlenai]

Beware post about Josh Raed / Chosenwads / ResistEverything

Mind you, do not harass, do not engage with this person. Don't witch hunt, yet, I'm only calling out this behavior that has been going on since 2023. Block them, evade them or move on.

Summary: There was a person constantly annoying me on my Tumblr ask about past interactions we had on this forum, from where I told them I did not wish to interact with them anymore and called out all of their fucked up, disrespectful, entitled behavior that over and over ignored my boundaries.

To the point they continued to approafch me me even outside this platform, ignoring once again my boundaries. Trying to victimize themselves, financially bribe me, gaslight me and continue to stalk me and once again, disrespect my boundaries after being blocked twice.

At this point I believe some of you may realize who this person, and if you are not sure yet, here is a hint:

This person has been provided advice by several people, for writing, drawing and making comics here. This person is a black hole, nothing is enough, dragged others through endless rabbit holes of questions and excuses, bluffing about doing something but later confessing they didn't do nor try anything they said, several requested them to show proof of all that time invested in them not ending nowhere, and alas, this person always had excuses once again of not being able to do anything, not having the time, not being able to focus, but surely focus all their energy on replying lengthy posts and create several more excusing themselves.

You guessed right, Josh Raed / Chosenwads / ResistEverything continued with his obsessive behavior and even more now continuing to cross the line and keep bothering me even when I'm barely in the Tapas Forum anymore.

You don’t understand anything if despite being told to stop interacting; that I’m ignoring you. You keep inserting yourself onto other people’s lives and disrespecting their boundaries, especially on other social media

If you are not familiar with Josh Raed / Chosenwads / ResistEverything, let me tell you: This person made several Topics and Threads in the Tapas Forum, at the point of being considered Spam and being warned by the Mods to tune it down and to stop bothering others’s boundaries several times, he also went to people’s DMs as shown above. (There is no blocking feature) and only when called out he backtracks and pretends to act misunderstood when his intentions and tone were very clear in the beginning.

No kidding, just check the dates the threads were created to see Clinically online behavior

Josh was told by me I did not like him one bit, I don’t like the way he treat others, I don’t like how he demands and demands but none of us saw anything coming out of him, no nothing, just more and more questions and demanding our time and patience, some answers that only could be given to him by just trying instead of typing and being clinically online in here,Josh even admited waking up and just getting into the forum first thing in the morning, clearly having a forum addiction, and presenting traits of attention seeking behavior. Many people are neurodivergent as well, including me, so many have tried to help him in his creative endeavours through neurodivergent, amateurs, novice friendly approaches but even the advice given by fellow neurodivergents, professionals, actual art teachers and even with different resources and approaches wasn’t enough for him.

I simply called him out over these repetitive patterns once I got fed up, and how he never seem to be doing anything except lengty threads after threads there, with questions that he already asked and others have answered or that he could answer himself instead of making us tango for a whole morning, and even how he was persistent and demanding via DMs, he sure didn’t had time nor could write a lot for his own story, but sure was quick to write a Bible defending himself and making yet even more threads in the forum. Others have called him out as well, especially when he says he practices yet doesn't show anything, and how he constantly contradicts himself and tries to deny things until he has his own comments screenshoted at his face, even when others tell him he makes them feel frustrated over not seing him at least trying, not improvement, just trying, show don't tell. Even to the point that when others began to ignore him, he began to make threads about no one answering him anything, eventually I stopped filtering my words and just being blunt, no gentle, no surgacoated, no harsh, no honest wording was enough for him back in 2023, but surely he went out of his way to grab everything I said and answer bit by bit, even after I told him I don't care about his explanations or excuses, because to me that's what he does if he invest his time more in the forum than actually drawing or wrinting, he is online what he shows, doesn't show what he is truly doing, he shouldn't be surprised others assume he is doing nothing when he does anything except what he says he is doing.

On July 2024 I set my boundaries about not wanting anything to do with Josh / resisteverything / chosenwads. Which he completely continued to ignore and even continued to attempt contact after several times telling him to stop.

Groundhog Day over and over

After calling him out, I simply began to ignore him and be less and less present in said Forum (Despite work and being busy), because honestly, I had no patience for him nor wanted him approaching me anymore after he did so on both my Tumblr and Ko-Fi.

At first I didn’t notice who he was in Tumblr, as he changed his username and overall apperance of his blog. But in Ko-Fi, despite I’ve expressed how much I don’t like this person, they commission me? Weird behavior, and invasive of my boundaries. I debated if to do a refund or just do the commission, it was just $5 Dollars for a Surprise, no revision type of commission. You give me the references, I work with that, your references aren’t clear? Well, beggars can’t be choosers.

First one was the reference, only indication was to make the sleeves thorn and give the character long pants. No other instructions, nor prompts. Secon one is what I ended up doing and interpreted even with insufficient information, sleeves falling because of gravity and pose and facial expression I had to come up myself as those aspects weren’t filled nor mentioned by Josh, changed the pants as requested and even delivered within the stated Turn Around Time. Instructions and Terms are stated at the beginning of making the order, so at no point this person who loves to ignore what others tell him wasn’t informed about how to make it and what was required in the first place, or that stuff that wasn't clarified will be interpreted. But Josh is known for not reading and not following instructions and don't give a flying fuck about anything except himself, so of course after a whole year of making that commission he dares now to complain after being pissed I don't fall for his victimism and excuses of him not being misunderstood, no, that's what pricks say when others don't fall for their shit.

Now I know I should have done the refund and block him on Tumblr before doing so on Ko-Fi, but surely, after doing the commission and seeing him continue bothering me and messaging me I decided to block him there, I wasn't unable to block him on Tumblr as I have deleted his asks as he changed his name in Tumblr from chosenwads to resisteverything.

Eventually, when he made that post in the Tapas forum about others not interacting much with him or having threads with no answers, some just snapped and began to talk about their negative experiences especially to those that weren’t aware of the dynamic that has been repeating since the beginning of 2023, including me. I addressed and left explicitly stated in there my wishes, not wanting to be contacted again, not want to exchange anything with this person again, don’t want to deal with his manipulation, lies, victimization, gaslighting, twisting the narrative nor whatever new excuse he made everytime someone calls him out and decides to backtrack to attempt to change the very clear intentions he originally had (Screenshot of my post I shared way above)

As I checked out Tumblr, now knowing his usernames, is clear that around the same time I blocked him on Ko-Fi, he changed it to resisteverything. And from what I’ve seen, even in there, other people has blocked him as well or started ignoring him, don't care it is from 2024 if he's been sending me several asks this year, his behavior continuing as obsessive and repetitive as ever, he can try to write and type as much as he wants but his actions speak louder.

All of this is JUST from Tumblr interactions I’ve found, and some of the members at the Tapas Forum knows how WORSE it used to be back in 2023, not really that hard to know considering what just literally pops on his user profile.

And from what I was told, despite I blocked him, he is now stalking my Tumblr blog, took screenshots and repeated the same pattern he did back in that thread from July 2024. I already told him as much back then. So many have told him as much as well.

Because every now and then he has been making asks on my blog, sometimes anonymously and other times with his resisteverything account, it was only when I reblogged a lighthearted thread about autism and misunderstandings that finally, the sir puts enough information on his cryptic DMs as I don't have a crystal ball to know who he is.

Josh, you weren’t misunderstood, you acted like an asshole, like a creep, overstep my boundaries over and over again, and went to the point of stalking me. So no, you are not being misunderstood, you are a selfish, entitled, persistent man-child

if you keep doing whatever you want instead of listening and processing what others are telling you, you are selfish and entitled, you can’t excuse this in autism or neurodivergency because almost everyone that interacted with you is on the spectrum as well, you disregard other people’s feelings and requests, yet you complain when others get done of your shit and pay you with the same coin.

I have no expectations from you, Josh, I don't want anything to do with you, so stop deluding yourself in the idea that you need to bitch to me or try to show me stuff I'm not interested into, respect is the common ground, you earned my disrespect and desire to avoid you, so stop coming at me, stop interacting with me, stop trying to approach me, stop stalking my blog even after I blocked you, stop having me in your head because until that last ask you sent, you weren't in mine. I don't want absolutely anything from you, not even money, money that even belongs to your mother.

You are not being misunderstood, you disregard others, you ignore what is being told to you, you have no social boundaries nor accountability, you don't care about limits, you don't respect them, you invade other people's personal spaces, you continue to attempt to insert into other people's lives even after being blocked, you try to bribe others to do what you want, you are entitlement at its finest if not selfishness.

I don’t want to interact with you = That means even outside the Tapas Forum I don’t want to have anything to do with you = That means you can’t convince me otherwise with money, flattering words that look shallow after everything you've done or invading my personal space Stop Approaching me = That means leaving me alone, no stalking me, no making side accounts, no following me on my other social media, no answering nor making blogs about me, you don't have any right to request anything from me after over and over disregarding and ignoring others and continue to impose your childish tantrums. I block you = I don’t want you to see what I make, I want you to leave me alone. All of the above

I don't want you replying to this post, I don't want you making screenshots or quoting my thread, I won't read you, I only know what you did when I called you out on Tumblr after blocking you because others have told me.

[candkneecorn]

oh yeah feel free to use me as a venting spot as well i suppose. i just like talking to ppl in this community y’all are great. other than you weird ass anons but you make me laugh. i also just like talking shit lol