#blahaj spotted

[teabree-shark]

Restuffing your blahaj is a delicate task

[toxpuppy]

puppy

[blahaj-detector]

Wdym imposter? I'm just blahaj :]

The only Blahaj here is in the image above.

[blahaj-spotted]

Blahaj spotted! 🌊🦈🌊

[blahaj-spotted]

Blahaj spotted!!! 🌊🦈🌊

[spotaus]

Yippeeeee!!!

Finally got in the Acrylic charms I ordered a while ago of Techie!Blue! I didn't really have a reason to make merch of him but like, no harm no foul lol 🙏 plus it's a good test for future projects I do!

The colors turned out great in the print, and this is my first time ordering ones w/ a patterned side, and I really enjoy it!

[blahaj-spotted]

Blahaj spotted! 🌊🦈🌊

I did this for the final part of my animatic but i loved it so much i wanted to post it

He would definitely own a Blåhaj and take care of it like it was his son

[gimmick-blog-bracket]

Because there are only (!) 128 polls this round, I've lowered the queue frequency to 32 posts a day, because that is a nice simple power of 2. After this round, I will change the number of posts per day such that all of the polls will be released in 2 days, so the next one will also have 32 a day, then 16, then 8, etc.

Regardless, here are the competitors for round 1:

hasgavlebockenburneddownyet

the-compressor

cantheywinthehungergames

would-you-punt-them

ominous-signs

throckmorton-the-skater

identifying-dogs

identifying-cat-phenotypes

alphabetcompletionist

the-official-netherlands

rat-detector-detector-detector

yesornopolls

how-many-evil-flags

crane-detector

onionpainter

i-make-things-snakes

onenicebugperday

no-stupid-questions-official

i-identify-as-an-ominous-threat

hot-take-tournament

cantheykillmacbeth

bear-detector

localairport

cat-spotted

probablybadrpgideas

parentheses-posts

ifitwasediblewouldyoueatit

mcmansionhell

ofishal-fish-posts

really-fucked-up-stimboards

identifying-dinosaurs-in-posts

the-actual-ocean

pointless-achievements

making-your-fave-in-fr

creatures-in-posts

e-counter

is-the-post-reliable

the-timeloop-tourney

smashorpassgilf

ginger-ale-official

official-boob-posts

earth-updates-today

rat-detector

making-you-in-ponytown

haveyouatethisfruit

cantheysurvive2001aspaceodyssey

does-this-require-cyanobacteria

mammalidentifier

kittybroker

pokemonbattletournament

reallybadblackoutpoems

postsofbabel

incorrectconspiracytheorist

arewebeholdingaman

lowpolyanimals

united-states-health-care

snailifier

the-actual-catacombs

identifying-spacecraft-in-posts

parappa-raps

little-bitch-detector

blood-heritage-posts

scp-threats-is-back

fake-post-archive

one-time-i-dreamt

shirtsthatgohard

tf2heritageposts

rat-detector-334

in-the-bible

identifying-horses-in-posts

peoplegettingkindamadatfood

official-mantis-shrimp-posts

whatcoloristhatcat

identifying-maille-weaves

things-that-are-not-true

terriblerealestateagentphotos

good-pokemon-center-reviews

characters-with-garlic-bread

same-picture-of-a-rock-every-day

shrimpradar

identifying-cars-in-posts

official-wasp-posts

identifying-birds

carbon-monoxide-detector

sealsdaily

counter-facts-i-just-made-up

validwarriorcatsnames

i-type-things

hellsite-hall-of-fame

content-free

eroticismofthemachinedetector

asciicompletionist

givingyouarandompathogen

my-hobby-is-finding-the-source

would-you-eat-them

apolladay

evilwizard

official-knight-posts

fluttershywheresheshouldntbe

card-of-the-day

writing-prompt-s

memes-to-show-the-past

can-they-lift-thors-hammer

couldtheybecouldtheybekira

randomalienencounter

is-jk-rowling-dead-yet

amphibianaday

chicago-mentioned

critter-creature-or-beast

yeahokayillreblogthat

maryland-officially

whoishotteranimepolls

official-linguistics-post

blorbo-court

detector-rat

making-you-in-atlyss

i-give-you-a-fish

i-make-things-spheres

amongus-text-detector

alonglistofbirds

girl-detector

mouse-spotted

dear-ao3

googlyeyesonmagiccards

baba-is-blog

rat-detector-detector

xkcd-for-that

ace-attorney-smash-or-pass

binas-official

i-say-ok

couldtheycatchkira

identifying-typewriters-in-posts

post-store

same-picture-of-benson-every-day

bestanimal

secondbeatsongs

musical-posts

todays-xkcd

am-i-the-asshole-official

the-glitter-painter

eggblackoutpoetry

rating-shittysawtraps

translatingpostsinfrench

the-blahaj

transit-fag

lichenaday

i-identify-guns-in-posts

front-facing-pokemon

thoughts-of-eel

official-crab-posts

making-you-in-roblox

aita-blorbos

doyoulikethissong-poll

flametexting-posts

dailyhatsune

cat-identifier

dailyquests

the-magenta-painter

haveyouheardthisband

i-make-things-into-faces

the-haiku-bot

ao3org

would-they-survive

making-you-in-sticky-business

catcrumb

wtf-scientific-papers

reading-comp-wrong-answers

c-counter

randomitemdrop

gimmick-thief-thief

simplified-birds

i-make-things-content-aware

ca-dmv-bot

rotating-donuts-blog

couldtheybekira

contextfreepatentart

fixing-bad-posts

the-icy-painter

jesus-holding-your-fave

making-you-in-lps

is-destiel-canon-yet

it-hurts-to-post

aistobascistod

shit-hdb-would-say

hitboxesonstockimages

howdotheyliketheirsteak

its-wednesday-sparkle-on

certifiednewyorkposts

todaysbird

the-disempunctuationer

theyshapedlikefriends

massachusetts-official

theshitpostcalligrapher

fish-identifier

snake-spotted

banjobebleping

relevant-wikipedia-articles

shark-detector

gimmickblog-taxonomist

peeledpokemon

bovineblogger

periodiccompletionist

ohio-thestate

bible-word-counter

gimmick-thief

three-dee-ess

cool-rocks-official

bugthingsdaily

is-it-out-of-touch-thursday

todays-problematic-ship

your-fave-as-owl

whatsthebird

accidental-homestuck

what-day-of-the-week

househeritageposts

fox-detector

hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard

worlds-worst-ships

dyktvideogamesfx

official-olm-posts

lesserknowncryptids

hands-you-a-spatula

transparentcatpngs

the-reverser

charl0ttan

is-deltarune-tomorrow

official-cannibalism-posts

magic-vending-machine

statistical-distr-of-polls

dog-spotted

can-they-assemble-ikea-furniture

dailypokemoncrochet

post-uwuifier

makingyourfavindti

was-house-fruity

textposttropes

free-post-store

sat-a-day

wouldyoudoitforaklondikebar

where-is-tom-scott-today

littleguysdaily

badjokesbyjeff

identifying-planes-in-posts

doyouknowthisdisabledcharacter

making-you-in-mc

walmart-the-official

tf2-post-archive

making-u-a-cube

identifying-guns-in-posts

postanagramgenerator

punctuation-completionist

i-give-chess-pieces-to-people

colourpickingpride

incognitopolls

shittysawtraps

i-give-olms-to-people

[i-am-hungry-24-7]

Simon Riley lets out a high-pitched squeal when you shower with him first time because the water is too goddamn hot. (but it’s the best temperature for you).

LOL YES YES YES THIS IS SO TRUE!! Idk why but I also have a hc that he prolly jumped a bit to avoid the hot splash because in his military life he's used to shower in cold ass water, and rarely has time to adjust the temperature since he showered in rush (3 minutes shower). His skin might be a little pink or red after warm (hot) shower. Please just give this man lukewarm bath with rubber duck, shark and starfish, a gentle scalp massage would be a help too and trust me 100% he's addicted to it

yes he deserves a nice bath 😈 ty for the ideas!! this is just some little scenes I think will happen :D!

Simon*Reader, silly couple

btw anon’s talking about this post

Shower with Simon Riley

1.

You finally convince Simon to shower with you the first time (not that he doesn’t want it, he’s just not familiar with these intimate couple things, give that man some time to build his courage).

You throw your clothes aside without any bit of shyness, and step behind the shower curtain, turning on the water and waiting for Simon to come in.

You can’t help but salivate at the man’s figure, and he seems to notice your gaze, his ego must thrive to sky-high in mere seconds.

Until you rinse the water on his chest.

“eee!”

“???” You almost doubt it’s a seagull showering with you when you hear the high-pitched squeak coming from your lover whose voice is always low and gravel.

“...” Oh, and he’s avoiding meeting your eyes now.

“Did you just squeal Simon?”

“No.”

“But I heard—“

“No.”

2.

“You want this bath bomb or this or that?”

“They’re all fucking same.”

“No, this is vanilla, this is lavender, this is rose and this is...”

“Bloody hell... just choose one for me.”

“Alright then.” You toss the vanilla one into the lukewarm water.

10 minutes after Simon falls asleep in the bathtub with the rubber duck in his hand when you softly scratch his scalp.

...

A few days later, you open the drawer outside the bathroom and get drowned by tons of vanilla bath bombs.

“I thought someone said all of them are the same...” You smirk at Simon, while he just stares at you and can’t find a convincing reason to defend himself.

3.

You discover Simon’s skin turns into light pink after showering with you a few times.

“You’re like a strawberry” You two are cuddling on the bed after a soothing shower together. “Your skin always becomes pink after you shower with me.”

“I’m not a fucking strawberry.”

“How about peach?”

“That’s the same.”

“but it’s cute, seeing your cheeks turn red.”

You poke his face cheekily, but he just shoves your blahaj on his face to cover it.

“What, Simon?” You snicker as you scoot closer “Shy for being said cute?”

“...” He doesn’t answer, just covers his face with your plushie more secure.

“How can I kiss you when you cover your face, handsome?”

“...” Simon still maintains silence, but you’re damn sure he’s hesitating.

“You don’t want my kiss?” You fake a disappointed tone, and eventually, he moves the blahaj out of his face.

Your smile deepens when you still spot the pink smearing across his cheeks.

“That’s my man.” You peck his lips “Thanks, cutie”

You really should stop teasing him. You tell yourself when he smashes the blahaj on his face again once he hears you call him cutie.

[catboybiologist]

I've been weirdly resistant to getting a blahaj for so long. I love sharks, I love large, huggable plushies, and I love cringe transfem stereotypes, so what was the holdup? Idk, it kind rolled around to me liking sharks so much that I didn't want to have a "generic" one. Spot, my leopard shark, is incredible.

That all changed when @glowingemberz cruelly ordered one for me against my will and had it delivered to me.

And uh. I get it now. The size, the light springiness of the material, the shape... This is the most huggable plush ever, wtf

So anyways. Spot has a friend now. Say hi to Saruman (they/she)

[blahaj-spotted]

Blahaj spotted! 🌊🦈🌊

Gravity Falls doodles!!

[the-gulhaj]

Gulhaj presents:

The (offical) unofficial list of the sharkverse:

Just all the sharks I have spotted so far.

@the-blahaj

@the-rodhaj

@the-gronhaj

Me the-gulhaj

@rosahaj

@the-lilahaj

@the-svarthaj

@the-rodbrunhaj (formerly dårskap)

@the-grahaj

@the-rodgulhaj

@the-vithaj

@the-klapparhaj

@the-magentahaj

@blalilahaj

@demonhaj

@the-demonhaj

@thedivineguldhaj

@the-rutighaj

@the-smahaj

@the-haj

@the-djavulsksilverhaj

@the-purpurhaj

@the-purjolokhaj

@the-brunhaj

@brunhaj

@the-snohaj

@the-turkossmahaj

@regnbagshaj

@the-screenwriting-haj

@the-turkoshaj

Former medelstor-blarod-haj now @svard-haj

@ultraviolett-haj

@the-attaarmadhaj

@the-dinohaj

@the-anglahaj

@the-leendehaj

@the-litenhaj

@the-omvandhaj

@the-448c-haj

@the-jahalh

@the-eldritch-skrackhaj

@ogiltig-haj

@swimhaj

@the-ljusgrahaj

@spelutvecklare-haj

@the-sonicjah

@the-v1haj

@cardboard-haj

@the-hajhaj

@hajtale

@the-blahajtale

Other:

@the-blavingad

And more are arriving from the blahajverse!

[devilcat3d]

im afraid to cuddle my blahaj cause its in such good shape and i dont want to ruin how perfect it looks. like i keep it in a spot where it can't have its fins bent in a way that could damage it and everything. chat do i have a problem (<- girl who already knows the answer)

[blahaj-spotted]

Blahaj spotted! 🌊🦈🌊

this will get to the right people

[whats-it-mean]

hii may i request anything w john x reader. like literally anything imso sick for him

Scary guard dog privileges on movie night ☆

For @mizukiyama

Mikoto/john x reader during milgram movie night !

A/N - Tysm for the req!! and ofc ! we love john in this household. i hope its ok i went with a horror movie theme bc my brain is empty ahshdj,,, i hope you like it tho !! the mikoto/john brainrot is real. john would be such a guard dog in my mind wahskd we love a protective bf &lt;3

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Horror movies weren’t exactly your forte- you could withstand them, and you wouldn’t be loosing sleep over some cheesy plotline- but in the moment, you knew full well you were weak to jumpscares. But tonight you were watching a movie with the other prisoners too, which meant you were ready to take every measure necessary in order to not make a fool of yourself in front of the others. 

After at least 20 minutes of wasted time with everyone scrambling about to get settled under layered and fluffy blankets, most everyone seemed comfy and content with their spots, except for Amane, who had adamantly insisted that she would not be partaking in the movie. You yourself were covered in blanket upon blanket, so much so that it was almost hard to see you underneath them, next to Mikoto, who had a bowl of popcorn propped carefully on his legs. His eyes were narrow and harsh, and he was mostly silent, a general sign that it wasn’t exactly Mikoto, but rather… the other Mikoto.

You had discussed the topic of Mikoto’s… other versions with Es multiple times, but as close as they ever came to caving and giving you more information, they simply shook their head and muttered that they couldn’t help you. And you couldn’t blame them- as prison guard, it was no surprise they weren’t able to tell you the details of the situation.

You let out a quiet sigh as a hush fell over the other prisoners, the screen illuminating itself as the movie started up. It stayed mostly quiet throughout the room, save the occasional whine from Fuuta about how unrealistic the special effects were (despite the fact that he had a death grip on his blanket). 

It was a basic horror movie plot, completely predictable, and, yes, the special effects were shitty- what you would expect from a movie night in prison, although you could still feel the way you got uneasy any time it fell too silent. Every now and then, it would go completely silent on screen, the protagonist walking into a trap so obvious it almost bothered you how stupid they were. An obvious setup for a jumpscare.

You knew it was coming, but at the same time, you were absolute shit at preparing yourself for it.

The moment you heard the noise, you jumped noticeably high, letting out a squeak that was thankfully hidden by Fuuta’s much louder yelp. Instinctively, you reached out to grab whatever was closest and most convenient, since usually, at home, this object would be your precious Ikea shark- but, alas, as fate had it, you did not end up wrapping your arms around a Blahaj, but Mikoto’s arm. 

Shame that felt even worse than being jumpscared settled over your entire body, and you felt your face flush red as you prayed desperately that nobody else had noticed. You watched for any sort of reaction from the man beside you, but he didn’t flinch, or even let his gaze waver from the screen. Shakily, you turned your head back to the screen, although you felt it was far too awkward to try and move now. You felt your body slowly calming down, heart rate going back to normal as your racing mind slowed…

Until you felt a slight shift, and in some sort of response to the way you’d jumped onto him, Mikoto wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you up against him. He was subtle about it, making sure not to make any sudden movements in hopes of nobody realizing. Once you were secure against his chest, he placed a hand in your head and you leaned onto his shoulder a bit. Your nerves were going crazy from the sudden intimacy, but you couldn’t deny that it was nicer.

Part of you wanted to ask Mikoto what he did that for, but his mood was much more fickle when he was different like this, and you knew that if you brought attention to the two of you in a position like that, Mahiru would never let you hear the end of it.

You just stayed, sitting against him like that, practically overflowing with warmth, struggling to pay attention to the movie at all any more. You felt another jumpscare building up, but in the back of your mind, you couldn’t really react in time.

But he did.

His grip on you tightened the moment anything popped up on the screen, and as the night progressed, he continued to behave like this, glancing over at you every so often to make sure you weren’t too scared. The way he held you so carefully, you could almost mistake it as him wanting to protect you-

oh.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── end

[vee-lociraptor]

i could probably start a blahaj spotting sideblog i love that guy