#bullshit detection

[amandaoftherosemire]

Something to keep in mind when consuming news: percentages cannot be trusted. When someone gives you a percentage without numbers, they’re trying to manipulate you. For example, I saw that New York has deployed the National Guard to your subway because of an increase in crime. Every report gives percentages on the increase, but never any hard numbers. I went looking and found the report the MTA sent to the New York City Council. Would you believe that from 2022 to 2023 there was a 142.9% increase in burglaries? Shocking! Of course they militarized your public transportation!

Right?

Except that the actual numbers tell a different story. The difference s that there were seven (7) burglaries in 2022 and seventeen (17) in 2023. Hell, there were half as many murders in 2023 than in 2022, but you don’t hear about the 50% drop in homicides, do you?

Here is the report, see for yourself:

I’m not a New Yorker, so I don’t want to pretend I know what’s going on. It just seems like the actual numbers say y’all are a lot safer than you think you are. Seventeen burglaries in a year on a public transport that serves the most populous city in the United States doesn’t seem that bad to me. I feel like if the governor of my state rolled out the National Guard to my bus station, to rifle through my bag and violate my fourth amendment rights, over seventeen burglaries in a year, I’d fucking riot.

[finchfvkingcortes]

thank you to this tweet for giving me the perfect opportunity to ramble about edwin’s outfit during the confession scene because oh how i love it

the juxtaposition between these two scenes and what edwin wears is so good because he goes from an outfit he chose and put together when he planned to confess vs a blood stained shirt when he actually did but what i think a lot of people don’t realise is that edwin isn’t wearing pyjamas when he’s in hell, he’s wearing undergarments. he’s in an undershirt and drawers, which was typical edwardian underwear and it is such a perfect way to show how vulnerable he is in that moment. so often clothes are used as armour or a way to make oneself feel more confident and that’s exactly what edwin is doing when he made himself look, as niko says, really nice. a nice outfit and feeling good about yourself can go a long way in making yourself feel more ready to, i don’t know, confess your love to your best friend of 30 years. now compare that to what edwin’s wearing when he actually confesses and you immediately feel a sense of vulnerability and almost nakedness in that situation because the modern day equivalent is standing there in your boxers. all of that armour, all that confidence is gone, he is both literally and metaphorically bare. in the end it’s just edwin, in the most basic sense, baring his soul to charles and i think it’s so so beautiful

[duckchaw]

Girlboss Crystal

[zinnie-zoloft]

Edwin had only been a proper ghost for about a month or so before he met Charles. In hell they have physical forms, he’d only been figuring out how to exist as a ghost for a few weeks.

Then Charles starts asking about how it works, what the rules are, and he tries to dodge the question but the kid keeps asking and he’s dying after all so he might as well humour him.

He acts like he knows what he’s doing, shows off a little even though he only knows the few basic tricks every other ghost probably figures out soon after death. It’s not like Charles will ever find out anyway, he’ll be moving on soon.

But then he doesn’t. Charles dies and decides to stay with Edwin, because apparently he’s crazy enough to throw away his blissful afterlife for a boy he just met. Edwin tries to tell him as such, to warn him of what he’s subjecting himself to an eternity of.

“I’ll be aces” he says, “I have you to teach me everything, don’t I?”. He looks at him with so much faith that Edwin can’t possibly tell him the truth, not now. He’s in far too deep and he’ll just have to keep pretending, he can’t let Charles down. Besides, how hard can it be?

[lutheban]

i just wish we could've seen them being friends you know...

[alexwilltellyouthings]

Rant (Thought About Edwin Payne Too Much Again):

Edwin may be the best one out of the main four in regards to dealing with his own anger. Isn't that something?

I mean, Crystal is constantly angry and letting it out in ways that hurt others or even herself. Niko gets angry at love and herself and thinks changing her whole personality is the answer instead of facing what she did wrong. Charles, well, duh.

But Edwin. We see him get worked up on episode one until he breaks down, says everything he needs about how the cases matter to him, and accepts the comfort that comes afterwards. From then on I think we don't see him get mad for a good while.

He gets annoyed of course, all the time, but that's just him. Anger, though? I can only remember the second instance being with the Cat King in the forest, shoving the bracelet in his face. Which he was brilliant to do, had every right to, stood up for himself and left.

He takes the anger when it comes, does something about it and lets it go. Something no one else seems to have learned how to do.

In conclusion: Edwin Payne, somehow the emotional role model of this fucked up little group

[bookshelfdreams]

I know it has been said before, but really, what do streaming services even want?

Dead Boy Detectives didn't flop by any measure. It did perfectly fine. The numbers where there. The reception was overwhelmingly positive. It had potential, and it was successful.

But I guess that's not enough. I wonder what would be enough; overwhelming numbers aren't, innovative storytelling isn't, a preexisting fanbase isn't. So what is?

Generating new subscribers? It seems that Netflix, and other streamers, are still trying to figure out how to make infinite growth happen in an inherently finite market - audience retention does not seem to factor into their calculations at all.

I have had a Netflix subscription since 2015. I have always kept it out of nostalgic fondness if nothing else, even when the prices rose and the quality of the offered media declined.

But I'm done. I don't see the value of the service anymore, when most of what you find on there nowadays is sloppy "documentaries" and half-finished stories that will never be allowed to go anywhere. Why would I continue to pay for that?

[tragedy-machine]

au where the boys are alive at the same time, in a universe where magic exists

Charles dies, killed by his friends, but a world without Charles is not something Edwin is willing to accept, so he uses forbidden necromancy to bring Charles back

but he comes back wrong

[dailytims]

Detective Comics (1937) #694

[bixels]

Jesus christ, there we go.

CW: artistic nudity.

Figure drawing with Azul.

[the-great-kraken]

saw somebody today try to say charles rowland is a monarchist, which is blatantly wrong, just look at the guy, but it did get me thinking that edwin, with his upper class edwardian sensibilities, would probably have been raised to support the royals. so now i'm very curious how that conversation went. anyway i think people should do more with the culture clash of 80s punk charles and posh edwardian edwin, i think it's really funny.

[isnt-that-wizardd]

netflix is the worst and i am greatly upset and i know that you all are too, so have this cute little thing i wrote a while back and finished this morning to help cheer you up

just a sweet little moment between the boys while their not on a case <3

crossposted to ao3 here

-------

For the Rest of Our Afterlives

When Edwin turned to look at Charles, the other was already looking at him, a smile playing on his lips. 

Edwin furrowed his brow. 

"What?" he questioned, shifting in his desk chair, sitting up a little straighter. But Charles just smiled wider in response, scooching from his usual spot on the edge of the desk so he was closer to Edwin. 

Edwin swallowed as Charles leaned in, that ridiculous, gorgeous smile getting closer to him. Edwin bit his lip, trying to hide his own smile that was growing to match. 

"Stop that," he mumbled. 

Charles had one hand resting on the opposite side of the desk from where he was sitting, supporting himself as he was now leaned so far into Edwin's space their faces were only inches apart. Charles only raised an expectant eyebrow in response to Edwin's weak, non-committal protest, fully aware of the way Edwin so easily melted under that gaze of his. Fully aware of how convincing his smile truly was.

"I cannot stand you," Edwin claimed, even as he leaned in as well, letting his smile show. Charles let out a laugh, and the last thing Edwin saw was Charles smug look before he gave in, closing his eyes as he pressed their lips together. He could feel the way Charles was smiling against his mouth, struggling to maintain the kiss. Still, as it always was, it was perfect to Edwin. 

"Can't stand me, then?" Charles teased when they separated again, using his free hand to brush some strands of hair off Edwin's forehead. 

When the two of them pulled apart, Charles smug look had been replaced with something so much softer, fonder. It was a look Edwin knew would have had his heart beating out of his chest were he still alive. One he still couldn't quite believe was directed at him- couldn't believe that Charles was giving him. Yet here they were, sat in the office of their detective agency, and Charles Rowland, his dearest friend and most important person in the world to him, was looking at him with more love in his eyes than Edwin could ever know what to do with. Instead, he simply leaned forward again, stealing another short, sweet kiss from his partner's lips. 

"Correct," Edwin claimed through another kiss, smiling as Charles bumped their noses together. 

"See, I'm thinking something different, yeah?" 

The smug look was coming back, but Edwin couldn't bring himself to be bothered by it, resting his hand on the arm Charles had supporting himself, playing with the bracelets on his wrist and relishing in the way Charles shivered at the feeling of Edwin's fingertips lightly tracing over his skin. 

"And what would that be, Detective Rowland?" 

Charles turned his hand over, clasping his with Edwin's as he sat straight up again to prevent himself from falling over. Perhaps instinctually, Edwin rolled his chair ever so slightly to follow Charles' movement, staying right in the other boy's orbit.

"I think," Charles began with a smirk, raising Edwin's hand to press a kiss to his knuckles, "that you like me." 

Edwin pursed his lips in effort to hide his smile. "Now I have no idea where you may have ever gotten an impression like that." 

"Yeah?" Charles asked smugly.

Edwin hummed, "Truly. Can't stand the sight of you. Leave now, before I. . ."

Whatever he'd planned to end his sentence with-  some empty threat that probably would have had Charles laughing- was lost to the universe as Charles kissed his knuckles again, his palms cradling Edwin's hand so gently, so reverently. He touched and looked at Edwin as though there was nothing more important in the world.

"Before what?" Charles prompted, his voice low and sweet as he hold Edwin's hand to him, tucking their joint palms against his chest, right where his heart would've beat. 

"Before I. . ." Edwin sighed out, an end to his threat still lost somewhere, escaping him. Truly, only Charles Rowland could make him lose his words, his every thought. Edwin stood from his chair, moving closer as Charles instinctively shifted his legs to allow Edwin to step into the space between them. 

"Before I fall in love with you, and remain that way for the course of the rest of our afterlives - for forever." 

The joy that shone on Charles' face was unmatchable. It seeped from his skin, bones, and very soul, filling the room around them and engulfing Edwin. He'd do anything to keep that look on Charles forever.

"Bit late for that, innit?" Charles inquired softly, still playing along with their little game. "I seem to remember something about some stairs."

Edwin huffed out a laugh. 

"Right. Well, then, I suppose it is already too late. You have bewitched me body and soul."

Charles had always, for as long as they'd known each other, loved listening to Edwin read to him. Nearly anything they could get their hands on. Jane Austen had always been a favorite of Charles, though he knows the boy would never admit it. Recently, Niko had shown them the films based off of her works - Charles had loved those just as much.

"And I love, I love, I love you," Charles finished happily, and Edwin gave a pleased hum.

"I love you, my dear Charles. . . Even when you do distract me from my work." 

A laugh burst from Charles as he gave a squeeze to Edwin's hand.

"Pretty sure looking into the magical properties and medicinal effects of. . . whatever plant it was can wait."

"Crystal wanted-"

"Crystal was asking an open question just out of curiosity. You're the one turning it into a research project."

Edwin frowned for a moment, looking down at the books on his desk. 

"Hey," Charles interrupted any thoughts jumping to his mind, squeezing his hand again."I'm not saying don't do it. It's properly sweet of you and she'll appreciate it. I'm just saying, maybe Crystal doesn't need an answer today, yeah?" 

Edwin hummed, "I do suppose you're right."

Charles let out a pleased sound, "I usually am, mate."

Edwin didn't bother even responding to that.

"Now come on. I wanna lay on the sofa and love you for the course of the rest of our afterlives."

Edwin let out a laugh, allowing himself to be pulled away from his desk and towards the little sofa in their office. Charles truly was right - when he had the love of his afterlife looking at him like that, everything else could wait.

[misstankthrust]

Monty, as a lawyer: Your honor, my client pleads gemini. He's just a 2 faced bitch. Thank you, your honor.

[bethrip]

TRUE DETECTIVE, 2.07 "Black Maps and Motel Rooms"

Jordan just walked in. I'll catch her? No. Bring her inside.

[vesna-v-irkutske]

How is this nigga studying law behind bars?? 😭🤦🤦my guy ain’t finna represent no one LMAO /j but also /srs

SAME QUESTION. Very "I'm bored as hell and I don't wanna work like the rest 😠" of him. And at the University of Latvia. Wow, okay, fancy pants "rich" McGee over here. 🙄 Serious answer & context. Anoufriev in a report to NTV's infoshow "Правда Гурнова" (True Gurnov) (released on February 10th, 2017): "I'm studying, uuuh, law at the University of Latvia. Well, that's the most important, what else right now. Need to find something to do, man, not getting into a noose... after all." Why? Because apparently, after 25 years, he can hope for parole (and in 2014, he said that his family was taking various measures to get him released on parole, but he wasn't counting on it (but maybe he became more hopeful)).

But there's another interview. In 2017, the crew of the TV program "Честный детектив" (Honest detective) also interviewed Artyom. I'll translate it one day, because it's SO BAD. LITERALLY the most SHAMELESS gaslight, gatekeep, mansplain, manipulate. It's not even funny, it's kinda scary. But I respect the grind. 🔥 I wonder if he really thinks that someone will believe what he's saying, or is he just trolling people with a straight face? He wasn't very fond of journalists in 2014, and he said he would only talk to members of the press if he was paid for it. Maybe it was him being a bitch and saying crap on purpose again, just not giving them the information they came for. Don't know what's worse: this or the possibility of him ACTUALLY trying to gaslight and convince everyone (and maybe himself too) that it was all a mistake. Imagine saying the dumbest and craziest shit with the most unflappable face and in the flattest tone. You're either very mentally ill or a very good actor. UPD. In another interview, he says something completely different about where he studies. He's taking a correspondence course at a branch of some philological university. So yeah, the law school was bullshit (yeah, the law school for a lifelong convicted murderer and (allegedly) former Neo-Nazi, SUUUURE), this is at least believable. But still take everything he says with a grain of salt.

[quinloki]

LMAO alright so fucking get this bullshit. I run a fanfic written by AI through a detector. 0% detected. I run one I spent like two weeks writing. 26-45% detected. Let me off this cocky ball fart globe.

I have to start this with a PSA

Do NOT feed ANYTHING into an "AI Detector"

Never. Ever. EVER. Don't do it.

AI Detectors at BEST are useless, at WORST you are feeding your own work into a AI Collection/Scraper.

A robot cannot detect a robot's work because neither robot is actually intelligent. Neither robot can make a determination. Neither robot can come to a conclusion based on context because there is not yet any artificial anything that can think.

YOU have to learn how to spot AI content that isn't labeled on your own. I'm sorry, cause it sucks, and you're probably going to second guess yourself a lot, and you're just going to have to do your best and keep it to yourself because even if you are 100,000% CERTAIN that you are correct, opening up some kind of AI witch-hunt is absolutely NOT useful.

/deep breath/

Okay, harried lecture over.

Don't use AI detectors, they're functionally worthless and you're running the risk of consensually handing over your work to AI. I promise you any AI Detector site has some ToS policy about how you're consenting to letting them use what you feed into it.

So do not feed anything into it.

Ever.

EVER.

I do not care if you think [God] brought the most divine and pure of AI Detector sites into creation via infallible will.

DO NOT USE THEM.