#but I agree that it can be complex to discuss given his privilege and current wealth

[chalamet-chalamet]

"I just don't want to use those words, 'isolated' and 'fear' and 'paranoia. I just think its not the correct way to go about the fortune and blessing that it is to work, whether they ring true or not, and bring attention to that kind of feeling-state. Even if it's valid, it's not really somewhere I want to go."

-Timothée Chalamet discussing fame in Rolling Stone’s December 2024 cover story

[houndin-around]

Cozenage | Maul’s Padawan pt.2

Warnings: nsfw, 18+, master/padawan relationship(she’s of age), smut, some angst

Wc: 4,496

Author notes; so it seems the first part I did was really well liked so he’s part II! I’m glad you guys liked the first one and I hope like this one too! This is my first ever smut writing..so uh please be gentle 🥺 I was really considering not doing this but here it is!!

“I just don’t understand why we haven’t found her yet!” the voice echoed throughout the council meeting, frustration visible.

“We’ve used all the resources we have at the moment, to find (y/n) Feles. Remember Coruscant is a very large city. The security forces can only do so much. We know two gangsters approached her, perhaps other members of the group took her. The two won’t give up any more information.” Mace Windu informed, his tone lacking any sort of sympathy.

“They must be hiding something. What if the separatists got a hold of her?”

The Jedi council took a deep breath, connecting with the force to figure out where in the galaxy you could be. As the days drag on, your old master is filled with vexation. There was more going on though then he let on, something far more suspicious than the others could read. He needed you, he needed your power even though it hasn’t reached it’s full potential yet. However, he knew you’d soon have the proper training that would be satisfactory enough.

“Clouded by the dark side, her future is. Something hiding her, no something protecting her. A dangerous force, I feel.” worry presented itself in Master Yoda’s voice. His body soon becoming rigid at the thought of you possibly choosing the path on your own accord.

After the confirmation that darkness has surrounded you, the meeting was adjourned but some masters remained behind. Some understood the complex relationship you had with your master, and his feelings toward you so to them they couldn’t calculate as to why Feles was acting the way he was.

“It just doesn’t add up. Even Ahsoka has shared some privileged information regarding the treatment (y/n) has received. I think Master Feles has some secrets of his own. An apprentice could be in severe danger, we have to do something! We can’t just sit around and wait for more information to be given up!”

Heads turned to the brash Jedi knight who was now on his feet filled with emotions. Of course, Obi-wan Kenobi was used to these types of behaviors from his previous padawan so the effect was little to none at this point. Quite frankly, Obi-wan agreed with Anakin for something did feel out of place.

“And what do you expect to be done, young Skywalker? Compel Feles to give up information he doesn’t even have? How do you expect that to look on the council’s part?” Windu’s glare could cut right through any other Jedi, yet for Skywalker it did absolutely nothing.

“As shocking as it may be, I agree with Anakin. It’s out of character for Feles to even show such emotion for another being, let alone an apprentice he’s never gotten along with. It couldn’t hurt to investigate a little more without him knowing?” Obi-wan’s voice was soft, though his point was persuasive as he gained some nods from his fellow Jedi.

--------------

“Fix your posture. Tighten up your right arm too. You’re all over the place today. Is something bothering you?” Maul inquired, soft eyes roaming your body.

“I’m sorry...I just can’t get it right. I’m failing you..” your voice was barely audible, shame running hot in your cheeks.

Shaking his head, the zabrak mosied over to you with narrowed eyes. “That is far from the truth and you know it (y/n)” his tone earnest, though deeper than normal. “The only way to vanquish the seventh form is by silencing your mind. Your apprehension, inner turmoil, is what’s stopping you. Feel the force flow through your body, let it guide you.” his tone was gentle, coaxing you to continue trying.

Standing adjacent to you, Maul activated his double-bladed saber and began moving through the positions of form seven. The fluidity was breathtaking, his saber cutting the air erratically yet he managed to remain in full control. As he demonstrated the form for you, his breathing became heavy and sweat glazed over his forehead. He managed to show no indication of fatigue, finishing off with one last throw in the air and a force push. Watching him sent a fiery sensation throughout your body and resting in your core, causing you to bite your lower lip. The sweat began dripping down his neck only intensifying the ache within. He was your master and nothing more, however, your body reacted otherwise anytime you looked at him the desire growing each moment.

“You make it look easy” you pouted, clipping your lightsaber to your belt followed by crossing your arms across your chest.

“Because I trust in the force and have a tranquil mind my apprentice.” his brow cocked as he noticed the heat settling in your cheeks. “Let me help you.”

Sheathing his saber, Maul shifted closer to you placing his hilt in your hands. Feeling the uncertainty bubbling within you, he placed his hands over yours guiding you through the movements breath hot on your neck. There were quite a few times your Master had touched you but this was unconventional, it had a different meaning behind it, so much so butterflies whirled in the pit of your stomach encouraging you to act on impulse. Pretending to adjust your stance, you play off accidentally backing into the crimson zabrak a little more, earning a faint groan. Making contact with him, his hands instantly grasp your hips, causing your core to burn in arousal. The tension was building between you both, so full of desire, except none of you made the next move. Without hesitation, Maul spun you around to face him, the space between you growing smaller. His amber eyes searched yours, slowly moving in closer pressing his forehead against yours and closing his eyes. It was as if he was holding back, resisting the urge of something you couldn’t read.

Opening his eyes and licking his lips Maul began to speak, “I...I think it’s time we finish up here. This form takes a lot of energy out of you and it is imperative you rest.” just as he finishes you catch him glancing over your body once more.

You gave a small nod before he broke the connection and taking his lightsaber back. A defeated sigh escaped your lips, you were so close to discovering if your assumptions were true and yet you were afraid to make the final move. Frustration boiled inside as you followed Maul to the shared room you have. He was possessive and protective resulting in you both sharing a room and bed as a precaution. The idea of someone taking you in the middle of the night haunted him and so his solution was being with him the majority of the time. Despite sharing a bed, boundaries were set in place by pillows placed down the middle of the bed to avoid any accidental contact. Entering the room, you went straight toward your drawers grabbing a clean pair of robes to take with you into the refresher. You wanted some time alone, time to process what just happened, and to figure out what it was you were truly feeling. Not even saying a word to Maul, you padded to the ‘fresher, placing your dark-colored robes on the marble sink, you undressed and turned on the sanisteam adjusting it to the temperature you enjoyed.

Stepping inside, you crossed your arms, hands on your shoulders taking in the warmth of the water washing away the weight of the day. After today’s events, you just wanted to stay within the transparisteel walls that protected you from the embarrassment of your actions. How could you be so rash? What if Maul didn’t even feel the same way you did and was simply holding back anger from you? Maybe you’re just confusing your emotions and don’t even want him like that? The doubts your Master had told you to rid of, came back with a vengeance with more to ponder on. Going to sleep tonight especially in the same bed as Maul seemed impossible.

--

The crackling of the fire filled your ears along with the smell of burning wood. Your mind buzzing with thoughts still confused about your feelings and actions. It wasn’t just the actions of today, your thoughts grew more intense focusing on the new path laid ahead. How did you end up here in such a position? What made you choose him and why Mandalore? During your first encounter, Maul had forgotten to mention that he was the new ruler of Mandalore. Despite having asked, it was something he did not want to discuss at least not yet. He also kept you hidden from the public eye of Mandalore citizens, those that were very close to Maul, like Death Watch, were able to meet you but that was it.

He didn’t lie though when he promised to train you. Much like earlier, he was so keen on helping you improve your technique and answer any question you had even if it didn’t pertain to the current lesson. You learned more from him than your previous master but even if the zabrack wasn’t like Feles, you still feared the inevitable errors. No matter how much you try to convince yourself otherwise, Maul intimidated you. You’ve witnessed his temper when it came to Death Watch. Metal lightly clinking against the marble flooring of the Sundari Royal Palace caused you to jump out of your skin.

“Do you fail to recall the ability I have when it comes to hearing your thoughts?” his voice was thick with sleep, brows furrowed.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you, Master. I just couldn’t sleep.” More like you didn’t want too. Rubbing the back of your neck, you noticed Maul inching closer to you out of your peripheral.

“You know, I’m more aware than you think. I know you have been coming out here the past few nights. I disregarded it with the expectations of it passing, but now. Now it seems it’s becoming a pattern. The only exception being, something seems to be troubling you a lot more than the previous nights.” eyes narrowing, his gaze fixated on you as he kept inching closer until there was about two inches worth of space between the both of you once more.

It baffled you how over the short period, things started to get a little different compared to when you first met. There was a type of tension between you both, though you couldn’t exactly put your finger on what it was. Today you tested those waters but instead of helping you, it only confused you more. The way he touched you though was unexpected, however, in certain circumstances, he would wrap his arm around your waist to pull you in closer to him if members from Death Watch were present.

“Hmm and yet again, the white noise is back. Care to enlighten me?” a sly grin presented itself on his face exposing his incisors.

“I don’t know. I’m confused about some things and there’s just a lot on my mind. I’m terrified Feles will find me and what would happen if he did...” sucking in a breath, lip quivering “I don’t want to live in constant fear of..”

Maul’s gaze soon became soft as he realized how much damage has been done to his apprentice. The apprentice he cares so deeply for that words alone could never express it all. His eyes searched yours, knowing you seek solace from him but he was unable to formulate a sentence.

“Just the thought about what happens if the Jedi find me? And when they see..”

“When they see you with me.” Maul interjected, his mouth forming into a frown.

“That’s not what I meant,” you mumbled, “I meant, will they take me? And what about you? What would they do to you? Surely they wouldn’t just slap you on the wrist…I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something were to happen to...” trailing off, the mere thought of Feles coming for you made you nauseous. Not because of what he’d do to you no, but what he was capable of doing to Maul. The only being in this galaxy that cared for you so much, could be in danger due to the choice you made.

“(y/n) I made an oath to train you, but that also included protecting you as you’re my apprentice. My dear fret not, for we’d be made well aware of the Jedi’s presence in advance. Besides, you think he’d be able to take me on?” Pressing his forehead against yours, you can tell there was an abundance of words being withheld from you, but how could you get it out of him?

“Now little one, it’s time you get some rest.” his voice honeyed, flashing memories from when you first met. This zabrack was so forbearing with you, no matter how pissed off he’d get he’d turn to you and it would diminish instantly something you still needed to adjust to. Without any hesitation, Maul scooped you up in his arms carrying you toward the bedroom. The thought of going to sleep sounded delightful until you remembered the wall of pillows that separated your bodies. On occasions where you’ve woken from night-terrors, the boundaries were forgotten, the safety of his arms bringing you back to reality. Tonight seemed like one of those nights at least you hoped.

Placing you delicately on the soft mattress, he folded the sheets over you before shuffling over to his side of the bed. Swiftly he removed the top portion of his robes exposing his bare skin, the red skin, and black tattoos perfectly intertwined with one another creating breathtaking patterns. It was moments like these, especially during lessons, that increased your heart rate, the desire eating away at you making your body do, and feel things it’s not used to. Maker was he handsome. Slipping into bed, he started to arrange the extra pillows in the usual barrier causing you to look at him with pleading eyes. A small grin enveloped his features as he threw the extra pillows aside, waiting for you to move the rest of the way.

“You could have just asked.” maul smirked while wrapping his arms around you, chin resting on the crown of your head, your face buried in his neck.

“I’m..s-” his arm briskly unraveled, bringing the pad of his index finger to your lips.

“No. No more of that.” he hushed, his hand slowly dipping underneath your chin to lift it encouraging your eyes to meet.

Being so close to you, holding you, was enough to rile up the zabrak his mind being engulfed by lust. His breathing becoming ragged the thought of withholding himself anymore was too painful. He needs to let go and show you just how badly he wants you, and for you to be his. After your little stunt from training, the sinful thoughts wouldn’t leave his mind. His eyes met yours, luring you into his trap. This time it was inevitable, there was no escape but you didn’t run, you wanted to this, to be his.

Leaning in, your lips collide together, the kiss rough but full of passion, leaving you both ravenous for more. His hands slowly begin to wander your body, molding to your form, savoring how your skin feels. Pulling apart, Maul lowers his mouth on the soft flesh of your neck, open-mouthed kisses that leave you feeling light-headed. Soft whimpers filled the zabrak's ears, as you crave his mouth all over your body. Slowly he begins climbing on top of you, his kisses slowly turning into nips. A small gasp escapes your mouth as his hands find their placement on your hips, his grip growing more intense by the second just like earlier.

“Is this okay..?” he brought his lips back to yours for a chaste kiss.

Inhaling sharply, you nod, cheeks beginning to flush from the eye contact.

“Good. Did you think I’d let you get away with that tease during training?” the low guttural growl from him was enough to send you over the edge.

Your skin was prickling, pressure building up between your folds. You wanted him badly, you ached for him, he even knew that except he was going to tease you until you couldn’t handle it anymore. His hands traveled to the hem of your robes, glancing at you for permission. Once you give him the go, Maul wasted no time getting the fabric off your body casting it aside. Your heart now pounding you were exposed in front of him, the chilled air making your nipples harden. The zabrak’s pupils were dilated, his amber eyes glowing with passion. A low growl emerged from him as he brushes his lips against yours. His touch was intoxicating, leaving you dizzy and breathless.

“I can no longer hold back. Now that I know what you want,” he whispered. “Let me take care of you..” he pleaded, breath hot against your neck.

Hands splayed across your chest, he grabs your breasts, nipples between his index finger and thumb tugging lightly. You let out another soft whimper, only to be muffled by his lips begging for another taste. The tip of his tongue traced the outline of your bottom lip waiting to gain entrance. Opening your mouth, tongues were rolling together in the passionate fiery kiss while his hand began to slide down toward your heated core very slowly. Mouth trailing down once more, his teeth connected with your neck nipping hungrily. The need to wanting to mark you as his, now in full control. Reaching your breasts Maul couldn’t help but nip and suck the flesh leaving several glowing marks that added to the collection he created.

“Gods have I craved you..” he groaned.

“If only you knew what went through my mind….” your voice quivering as his tongue swirled around your nipple, sending a wave of ecstasy through your body.

A smirk enveloped his features hearing the words leave your mouth, only for it to be replaced with an arched brow as his hand reaches your folds.

"Seems like someone is a bit eager?" Maul teased, his middle finger gliding up and down your slit, barely touching your entrance.

Pleasure consumed your body causing you to buck your hips into the digit. A sly grin plastered itself on his face as he pulls away, his torturous teasing making you beg.

"Please..maul.." you cried out, grabbing his wrist and placing his hand over your pussy.

"Tsk tsk," he growled, leaving his hand on your heated core but eyes burning into you. "You're still being punished."

His teasing was driving you insane, you couldn't control yourself anymore. The warning that left his lips was so seductive, giving you the confidence to wrap your arms around the zabrak's neck.

"Two can play this game.." you muttered in his ear. Placing feathery kisses along his throat, earning several moans from Maul.

His thumb began circling your swollen bud in retaliation along with his middle finger brushing against your entrance. Seeing the relief wash over your face, he grinned as he began to insert his digit inside you. Just feeling of how wet you were because of him was enough to make him lose all inhibition. Breaking free from your grip around him, he slid down your body spreading your thighs farther apart. The need to taste you was overwhelming. Placing delicate kisses on the inside of your thighs followed by several on the lips of your pussy, Maul then delved his tongue deep inside. The sensation was one you've never even thought to experience, toes curling and moans ringing throughout the room. The sheets bundled up in your hands weren't enough, you needed something rigid. Your hands made their way to his horns latching on as he kept lapping away at your pussy.

"Maker are you delicious (y/n).." he murmured, still deep between your folds.

The ability to speak was taken away from you, the only things you were able to let out were moans and whimpers from the satisfaction. Maul gave you one last tongue swirl around your clit before breaking away to pull off his bottom robes. His body was stunning, intricate patterns woven all over even around his cock. Speechless, you reach out and slide your hand down his chest, abdomen, until your hand wraps around his hard, ribbed cock. Precum glazed his tip, however, your attention was soon taken to his size. He was larger than you expected, hesitation filling you at the thought of him tearing into you. Sensing your apprehension, he places a warm hand on your cheek.

"I'll take it slow at first okay just relax..?" he cooed, leaning in for a kiss.

Seconds later, Maul was guiding himself in, your walls stretching around his cock. Judging by the minor grimace on your face, he pauses so you could adjust to his length while whispering praises in your ear.

Trying to push past the minor discomfort, you locked eyes with Maul, "Go ahead. Fuck me. I need it...I need you inside me" you whined.

"As you wish darling...but don't forget. You asked for it." he grinned, planting a kiss on your lips.

Soon enough he was beginning to thrust into you rhythmically, the pain being replaced by ecstasy. Curses rolled off your tongue while he growled and grunted back, his breathing ragged and muscles rippling. Intertwining his fingers with yours, he pinned your hands against the bed, sinking deeper into your core. His warm skin against yours was even better than you had imagined it. A sheen of sweat began to cover his body, glistening in the low light.

Throwing your head back against the mattress, jaw-slacked, Maul began leaving another trail of open-mouthed kisses down your neck as well as a wandering hand toward your clit. Pleasure scorched through your entire body, the pressure building in your stomach making your walls tighten around his member.

"Gods...Maul...I'm so..cl-" you whimpered, a gasp leaving your lips as his thumb began brushing against your clit.

"No, I'm not done with you yet." he growled, pulling his thumb away and placing his hands on your hips.

"Kriff!" with his thumb retreating from your swollen bud, you needed something to replace the euphoric sensation. "Fuck me harder then.."

His hands made their way to your hips, grasp tightening as his thrusts increase. The room was filled with skin slapping against skin and the musky smell of sex. Your nails found their way into Maul's sweaty flesh on his shoulder blades causing him to release a guttural growl.

"That's my good girl." he rasped, licking his lips. "Look at you are taking this zabraki cock." his praise was so alluring, that you'd do anything to hear more.

You could tell by the way he was breathing that he was nearing the edge causing him to lose himself completely. Maul was absolutely feral, hearts pounding, lost to the pleasure that devoured his body. Despite his strokes becoming sloppy they still managed to hit your g-spot each time, bliss traveling throughout your body. Your pussy was soaking wet. Him being balls deep, cock swelling and pulsating left you breathless. You couldn't hold back anymore you needed to let go.

"Please..please Maul I can't hold back anymore...I need to cum...please..." you implored, your nails digging even deeper into his flesh.

"Go...ahead. Cum for me..." he groaned barely able to catch his breath.

He pressed his forehead against yours, eyes squeezed shut. Your orgasm struck you like lightning, vision going black and thighs trembling. Amid yours, Maul then came, the feeling of him pulsating stronger than before. Pleasure rippled through his body making him buckle on top of you breathing roughly. Coming down from your high, you wrap your arms around the zabrak giving him a moment to recover.

"Well..." he inhaled still laying on top of you. "That was...unexpected."

"yeah.." you mumbled trying to come up with more words, though your mind was blanking as exhaustion was washing over.

"At least you now know what happens when you pull something like that," he teased. He shifted slightly pulling himself out of your cum filled pussy.

"Guess that means I'll have to do it again huh?" you blurted out before realizing what you had just said.

"So the apprentice still hasn't learned her lesson hmm?" his brow arched, amusement in his tone. "Next time I won't hold back then."

"You were holding back?" you sucked in a breath, feeling the tingling sensation between your thighs. Maker was your body going to be sore in the morning.

Maul swung his legs over you and sat at the edge of the mattress before standing up. He chuckled at your question, giving a curt nod. “I may have made a mess out of you…” he grinned, looking at the marks he left behind. “Come now, let’s get you in the refresher.”

Taking your hand, he helped you up and walked you over to the refresher, hand resting on the small off your back. Once he got you situated, he walked back out to grab his robes and slipped into the bottom half.

“Sir you have an urgent holocall!" a Death Watch member frantically barging into the bedroom.

Hearing a voice erupting from the bedroom, you turned the shower on but walked over to the closed door trying to eavesdrop. Who was coming in so late at night?

"Lower your voice!" Maul hissed, meeting the Mandalorian half-way.

"I'm sorry sir...it's just extremely urgent. It's Fele-,"

Maul interjected him, "Don't finish that sentence."

The Mandalorian shut his mouth quickly fear washing over him. Taking a deep breath he started again. "He's asking if you have her..." his voice in a hushed tone.

A wave of nausea hit you. There were only several ways that sentence could have ended. You walked over to the shower not wanting to hear any more in fear of the truth. Stepping in, the warm water provided you comfort as sobs wracked your body. You slowly slid your back down the transparisteel not wanting to ever leave the shower. Was his offer just a deception? How could he pretend just like everyone else? How could he be so vulnerable with you and seal the bond he claimed existed? None of it made sense to you and that made the anxieties worse. You needed to leave, to escape.

"Tell him I don't," Maul uttered, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Uh..well he requests your presence.." the young Mandalorian shifted uncomfortably.

Maul had enough. His frustration peaked causing him to use the force grip. The young mando dropped his helmet as he was grabbing at his throat, struggling to breathe. His eyes wide and beginning to tear, he truly felt as if he was about to die right then and there. Releasing the grip, Maul dropped the young man to the ground before walking right over him.

"Since you're incompetent, I will deal with this." he spat, anger fueling him.

[ihatetaxes99]

Death Note: The Glorious Manga Ending (And the anime that failed to deliver)

Well, this is certainly something a tad different from my usual affairs. Yes, I'm delighted to bear the news that I am taking a break from writing sub-par fanfiction and selling weapons to Middle Eastern terrorists in order to follow something a little less creative, but more immediately interesting to me in my current time of writing. I mean, hell, there's probably a 60% chance that no one will ever read this, since I'll likely drop it halfway through and go back to my black market dealings. But, in that small 40% chance that I do get this out the door, or indeed any further than this very sentence before I forget about it for all eternity, then I want to have a little discussion, a fun little analysis. And of course, I'm going to analyse everyone's favourite slice of life fluff comedy, Death Note. Specifically the ending and how I think the manga surpasses the anime in many, many ways.

If you haven't yet read or watched Death Note, then you won't be reading this anyway, so it would be rather pointless at best and an insult to your intelligence at worst to give a recap of how the series works. If you must have a layman's explanation, big murder book gets dropped into the human world, shenanigans ensue. There, now go watch or read it for yourself. Preferably read, as I am about to discuss. The manga is far better, entirely because of the second half. It's no secret that the Death Note anime handled the second half poorly. Content was cut, elements were skipped, scenes were changed entirely and Near, my favourite character from the manga, was done so dirty that he generally ranks as many people's least favourite, for some understandable reasons and others that I consider rather weak. But the main part of the second half aside, I want to talk about the final showdown, the confrontation in the Yellow Box warehouse, and how I feel the anime adaptation butchered a near-perfect ending for the sake of either time, or budget, or maybe to appease Light fangirls (because that definitely has a factor in why I don't like the anime's ending as much.)

So, to recap, most of the confrontation at the warehouse between the SPK and Kira plays out very much the same. Mikami writes the names down, Light reveals himself, the notebook is revealed to be a fake and Yagami has his famous mental breakdown, followed by one of the most powerful lines in the series:

(Note: I condensed the speech to fit neatly into two boxes)

I love this speech. I think it's one of the best in the series, for reasons that very much tie into why the ending in the manga works better. I want you all to think for a moment; I've seen a lot of people say Death Note is a series that doesn't take sides on the conflict. No, that is bullshit. In the early series, maybe, but from the moment Light Yagami killed Naomi Misora, and arguably even earlier than that with Raye Pembre, he was consistently portrayed as being more and more callous, more evil, more of a scumbag. Let's look over what he did, especially in the later stages of the series.

He:

Murdered the FBI agents tailing him.

Only expressed regret over Utika's death because it may negatively affect Kira's reputation.

Watched with no emotion as his father died and indeed, encouraged him to use the Death Note moments before he died.

Mocked Matsuda for mourning his father's death.

Manipulated two seperate women into doing his bidding (albeit, one was unintentional) and killed one himself, with plans to kill the other had he not been killed.

Instigated a riot in New York with the intent of killing Near and the SPK.

Killed FBI agents who were tailing him.

Only cared about Utika's death because it compromised Kira's strong public image and not because he was actually a good man.

Manipulated two seperate women into falling for him (albeit one was accidental) and promptly killed off one with no hesitation, with plans of killing the other had he not met his end first.

Watched emotionless as his own father died and even tried to get him to use the Death Note in his last moments.

Mocked Matsuda for mourning the death of his father and used it in a last ditch effort to distract the detective and escape.

Staged a riot with the intent of killing Near and the rest of the SPK.

And these are just some of them. By the end of Death Note, Light was not a good person. I personally never agreed with him, but he went from a disillusioned kid with a minor saviour complex to A full-blown, sadistic, perverted image of what he used to be, utterly unfeeling and cold-hearted, with a major God complex, a complete lunatic. As Near said, a mass murderer and nothing more. After everything Yagami's done over the course of the series, it was just too satisfying to read this for the first time, and I will concede, the anime did a great job adapting it. I feel a lot of Light fangirls agreed with him because his ideals sounded good on paper, but in reality, they're completely childish and self-serving. I am not one to moral grandstand, I believe those who take any excuse to give lectures about morality are annoying and often hypocritical scum, but my point here is that this is not a man any reasonable person could agree with if he were a real person. So, this teardown of his ego was perfect.

Now, the first big difference is the ultimate fate of Teru Mikami. In the anime, he kills himself in the warehouse, in a scene that makes me laugh every time due to the comically large quantities of blood spewing from him. He dies defending Kira's ideals, believing in his God. Or, if you choose to interpret it another way, he has accepted that Light is not God, and he has nothing else to live for. Either way, the anime lacks a key scene, after Light is shot by Matsuda and begging for help:

This is extremely important, as it continues what Near did with his speech and sets in motion the following trend for what is to come. Light is humiliated, his second most faithful pawn has turned against him, called him scum, seen him for what he truly is, and worse still, he's done it in front of everyone else. Teru Mikami has denounced his God, and this is just the stepping stone for the humiliation Kira is about to suffer. Also, it's worth noting that just before Mikami denounces Kira, there's a scene of Light crawling on the ground, bleeding, calling out for Misa and Takada to help him, seeming to have gone totally delusional, forgetting that Takada was already dead. This may have been excluded from the anime, or it may have been the fault of the subs I was using. It still serves as a vital part of the theme that the final few chapters hammer in, over and over again, that being the complete and total humiliation of Light Yagami. And the worst for our criminal-killing protagonist is still to come.

Finally, we reach the fate of the original Kira, the end of Light Yagami. In the anime, he uses Mikami's suicide as a distraction to escape, wherein he runs off, seeing visions of his past self, and dies out in the middle of a staircase, from a heart attack delivered by Ryuuk, calmly and quietly. This is all very nice and emotional, we see for a moment, Light contemplates what he became and wondering how it could have ended differently, and him dying in the middle of the staircase, as many people have stated before, is oh so very symbolic of how he finds himself unable to reach Heaven or Hell. However, this does not hold a candle to the manga.

This is what Light is like upon his death there:

Yeah, there's no real doubting it, he's going out like a complete bitch. Like the anime was thoughtful and silent, with an underlying sombre soundtrack, in this the once great Kira is reduced to a blubbering mess, throwing a tantrum because he refuses to accept his time is up. It was made very clear to him at the beginning that he was to die at Ryuuk's hand one day and now that it's here, he can't take it. He tries to cheat death, the one thing no human nor Shinigami can do. I mean, just look at the panels. He's a mess. A privileged, pampered brat who isn't getting his way. That is why I consider the Death Note manga ending to be superior to the anime in almost every way. While the anime gives us symbolism and a sense of calm, the manga goes all the way in tearing down this character, who has been a piece of human garbage for years at this point. I find it so satisfying to watch him get what he deserves, not only the death but the shame.

Light's own hubris and mental instability stole from him the honourable death he received in the anime. And that is everything I believe he needed, far more than the mere reality check he was given in the anime.

Phew, damn this was a ride and a half to write. I always appreciate feedback, if anyone wants to share their own thoughts on the ending. Please do feel free to do so, and I'll hopefully be back soon with your regularly scheduled shitty fanfics.

[marigoldbaker]

imperfections (69/?)

read it on ao3!

a spotlight on a different relationship dynamic this chapter!!

Xander had literally never seen Giles this happy, especially in the face of an impending apocalypse. Generally, Giles was all Stiff-Upper-Lip Guy, even in his most relatively cheerful moments—but here he was, late at night, waltzing Jenny round the living room and humming along to a song on the radio. It was like the proposal had brought out a new side to Giles, and honestly, Xander was really glad about it. The terrible couple of hours where they’d been sure Giles was going to die—that had majorly sucked, and seeing Giles this lit up with delight made things feel like they might finally be getting back to normal.

As such, when Jenny tugged him aside and entrusted him with what she said was an “incredibly important assignment,” Xander couldn’t help but feel like he’d been given a soft toss. Keeping an eye on Giles during the apocalypse? Giles? Totally Capable Librarian Man? Jenny might as well have asked Xander to stay at home and watch TV while the grown-ups saved the world. He wanted to tell her that, but…Jenny was letting him stay with them, in a warm, cozy house with home-cooked meals and family movie nights. Xander couldn’t disagree with her if it might mean going back to living with his dad, so he kept his mouth shut.

That got hard when he had to watch everybody else getting ready for the apocalypse.

“Buffy, Faith, before we head down to kick the hell-beast’s butt, I need you to check in on that bomb,” Jenny was saying, strapping a knife to her thigh.

“Bomb?” Buffy repeated.

“Jack O’Toole was trying to chat me up in chem,” explained Cordelia, who was applying lip gloss and loading a crossbow at the same time. Somehow. Honestly, Xander really didn’t know how he’d landed a girl as incredible as Cordy, but he counted himself lucky every day. “Said something about some bomb under the school. Probably nothing, but it’s at least worth looking into.” She considered. “Knock his head around a little if he doesn’t tell you how to turn it off, Faith.”

Xander glanced over at Giles, who looked just as happy as he had ever since he and Jenny had gotten engaged. Also a little nervous, but Giles always looked a little nervous, so it really didn’t seem like anything worth keeping him company over. “You’ll be all right?” Giles was saying to Jenny.

In answer, Jenny took Giles’s face in her hands and said something, quietly, that Xander didn’t attempt to make out. He turned to Willow instead, but Willow was busy discussing spells with Creepy Demon Substitute Teacher Lady. And Faith was polishing her knife, and Buffy was tying her hair up in prep for battle, which left…Wesley, for some reason. Wesley seemed to have latched himself even tighter onto Anyanka after she’d stood him up, buying her excuse about a flat tire way too easily.

No way was Xander feeling low enough to talk to that guy. He sat heavily down on the couch, feeling more useless than ever.

Giles kissed Jenny goodbye one last time on their front porch, feeling the old, familiar terror rise up in him as he looked at her. The woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with—it would be so poetic, so painful, if she died tonight. It would fit the pattern of his life: happiness snatched away only seconds after he realized it was there. And then he would be alone, again, with no one to hold him and kiss his hair and tell him she wanted him, even with all his life’s absurd complexities—

“Baby,” said Jenny, “get your shit together. We still have a wedding to plan.” That made Giles smile; he couldn’t help himself. Warmth spread through him as she smiled back. “I love you,” she said. “I promise I’ll play it safe.”

“I love you too,” said Giles, and tried to smile as he watched her turn and go. He couldn’t stop thinking about how quickly things could go from perfect happiness to—he had left his house, weeks ago, looking for Jenny, and ended up with his throat slit in a derelict old mansion. He could have died. He should have died. Some part of him would die, permanently, if he lost Jenny tonight.

Faith stopped as she was leaving, turning on the porch steps to give him a strange look. “Hey, man, you know it’s gonna be okay, right?” she said, a note of genuine concern in her voice. “You look really fucked up right now.”

“Thank you, Faith,” said Giles absently, and headed back inside, shutting the door behind him.

Xander was still sitting on the couch, staring up at the ceiling with a positively miserable look on his face. Giles empathized. His old instincts said that he should leave Xander to his own devices, but Jenny had taught Giles quite a bit better than that. Sitting down on the couch next to Xander, he said, “Would you like to talk about it at all?”

“No,” said Xander, glaring at the ceiling.

“All right,” said Giles. “Can you help me make cookies?”

“Don’t fucking patronize me.” Xander turned his glare on Giles, then froze, flinching back. “Uh. Shit. Man, I’m sorry. Sometimes I forget how, how you guys are being nice enough to let me live here, and I just, I need to keep remembering that—”

“Your living here isn’t a privilege, Xander,” said Giles, confused. “If you wish to air a grievance, we won’t turn you out on the street.”

“You say that now—” Xander’s voice broke. Looking mortified, he scrubbed at his face. “Jenny doesn’t want me out fighting with everyone else,” he said. “She made some dumb excuse up about you needing company, but I got the message loud and clear. This one’s a big battle and she wants to make sure I stay safe.”

Lord, there was a lot to untangle here. Giles honestly wasn’t quite sure where to start, and latched onto the easiest one to explain. Unfortunately, this was also the most honest one, and he had to take an unsteady breath before saying, “It wasn’t an excuse, Xander.”

Xander gave him an oh, really? look.

“The incident with Kralik affected me rather more than I let on,” said Giles carefully. “I don’t feel entirely ready to enter the field of battle, and required—” He swallowed, ducking his head. He felt as though Xander might think less of him after his admission, but he knew Xander’s feelings would be helped by it, and so he soldiered on. “I required company,” he said. “Jenny suggested you, on the grounds that we both thought you might treat my situation with the required sensitivity.”

Xander looked a little stunned.

“I do apologize if your feelings were hurt by any perceived insult,” Giles continued a bit shakily. “I truly never meant to offend—”

“Oh, man, Giles,” said Xander. He now looked upset in an entirely different way. Without a word, he leaned across the couch and hugged Giles—an awkward hug at a bad angle, but a hug nonetheless—and a rather overcome Giles had to blink very fast to stave off tears. “Are you okay?” Xander asked quietly.

“Well,” said Giles. His usual brush-offs weren’t coming to mind. “Well. Not quite. But your company really does help, Xander. Please don’t think Jenny—that she was giving you an easy assignment in order to keep you safe.”

Xander pulled back, looking a little embarrassed. “Kinda hard not to think that when she put me in charge of Hypercompetent Watcher Guy,” he said, leaning back into the couch and doing his best to look like he hadn’t just hugged Giles.

“Xander, I’m touched, but I’m hardly hypercompetent,” said Giles gently. “I’m simply doing my best in a rather difficult situation.”

Reluctantly, and a little wryly, Xander smiled. “That makes me feel kinda better,” he said.

“Oh?”

“I’m doing my best in tough times too,” said Xander. “Makes me think someday I can pull off the kind of stuff you do.”

“I fully expect you’ll surpass me within the next five years at least,” said Giles, grinning a little when Xander smiled back.

Giles started some chocolate chip cookies, and roped Xander into helping. “This is an extremely important life skill,” he informed Xander, who was currently attempting to pick shards of eggshell out of the egg in the mixing bowl. “At some point, you’re going to make some drastic mistake, and your significant other will want recompense. Baking always works in that regard.”

“Yeah?” said Xander, grinning a little. He’d just gotten a pretty tricky piece of eggshell out without breaking the yolk. “Does it work on Ms. Calendar?”

“Almost always,” said Giles. “I made her apology brownies after I accidentally recorded over one of her terrible action movies.”

“Might not work on Cordy,” said Xander contemplatively. “She’s always on some diet.”

“She’s rather young for that,” said Giles, sounding mildly concerned.

“I know!” Xander agreed. “I’m gonna tell her you said that, because she totally needs to hear it. I tell her how pretty she is all the time and she just goes—” He pulled a face.

Giles rolled his eyes a little, smiling. “Romantic partners can be a bit obtuse,” he said. “They tend to assume you’re biased because you love them.”

Xander blinked, then blushed. “Yeah,” he said. “Uh, you think I should tell Cordy I love her?”

Giles looked over at Xander. “Do you?” he said.

The answer to that question made Xander’s heart pick up and his cheeks flush. He ducked his head, looking down at the bowl.

“Of course,” said Giles awkwardly, reading Xander completely wrong. “You two are rather young to—that is, I would never suppose—”

“Yeah, I do,” said Xander to the eggs. It was the first time he’d told anyone. “I love her a lot. She’s smart, and she’s snarky, and sometimes we hang out in her car and she tells me all the latest gossip.” He smiled a little shyly, first at the eggs, then at Giles. “She makes me laugh.”

Giles was looking at Xander in a way that made Xander’s chest hurt, kinda. He’d always wanted an adult to look at him like that. “Well,” said Giles. “That’s wonderful. I’m sure she’ll be happy to hear it when you feel ready to tell her.”

“Maybe I’ll tell her when she gets back from the world-saving,” said Xander contemplatively. “You think that’d be a good call?”

“I think it’s a very important decision that only you can really make,” said Giles. “Are you done with the eggs?”

“What?” Xander glanced down at the egg, carefully picked out one last shard, and cracked another one, this one a little more precisely. The yolk broke, but the eggshells remained outside the bowl. “Hey,” he said, grinning. “I did it!”

“Good job,” said Giles, clapping Xander on the shoulder. “Help me mix them in and we’ll be half done with the batter.”

“Baking takes a long time,” groaned Xander, following Giles over to the larger mixing bowl.

The cookies were in the oven when they got a call from the library. Giles, who had been largely calm throughout the entire baking process, scrambled for the phone, picking it up before it had even gotten through its first ring. “Hello?” he said, sharp and anxious.

Xander waited, heart in his throat.

Giles’s shoulders relaxed, his face softening. “Darling,” he said. “Yes. Yes, we’re making cookies. Yes.” He paused, listening. “That’s—that’s wonderful news. Is the—” His smile flickered. “Oh. So you still have to—all right. Yes.” He swallowed. “I love you too. Stay safe.”

What’s going on? Xander mouthed.

Giles held up a hand, then hung up the phone. “They defused the bomb, but the Hellmouth is only a few minutes away from opening,” he said.

Xander thought about Cordelia up against a big, gross hell-monster and felt sick. “When are the cookies done?” he said.

“I don’t know,” said Giles. “I think that I would rather like to bake something else right now.”

Anything was better than waiting around. “Isn’t the oven in use?” asked Xander.

“Willow likes pudding, doesn’t she?” said Giles. “We can make that on a stovetop, and then we can make some hot chocolate for,” he swallowed, “for when they all come home.”

Home. Xander liked that. He liked that almost enough not to think about his friends fighting evil while he made fucking pudding in a kitchen. “Yeah, okay,” he said.

“Xander?” said Giles, and crossed the room, then placed his hands on Xander’s shoulders. This felt more deliberate than Xander’s dumb, clumsy hug, and the way Giles was looking at him reminded Xander a little bit of the way Giles sometimes looked at Buffy, and the combo of those two things made Xander almost unable to meet Giles’s eyes. “They’re going to be all right,” said Giles, just the way Jenny always said it. “Come now. Let’s make some pudding.”

It was three in the morning, Giles and Xander eating cookies and pudding in front of the television, when the door burst open and a chattering horde of people tumbled through. Cordelia’s hair was burnt off on one side, and Faith was leaning heavily on Buffy, and Jenny had what looked like a messed-up wrist, but they were all alive. They were all alive.

Xander stood up very fast.

“Oh my god, Xander, don’t look at me!” Cordelia shrieked, attempting to hide behind Willow. “I have to get a haircut! I look like some lopsided Before picture!”

“Before what?” Willow asked, mouth twitching.

“Hi, honey,” Jenny was whispering, and Xander saw that Giles’s face was buried in Jenny’s shoulder. He was shaking. That was a lot for Xander to process, especially since Giles had held himself together impressively well for pretty much all of the night. “Hi. Hey. We’re all okay.” She pulled a face. “I mean, I probably need to get my wrist checked out, but I break bones all the time. Nothing new.”

Xander crossed the room to help Faith off of Buffy, who looked pretty drawn and exhausted herself. “I can get her up to bed,” he said to Buffy.

“No, it’s okay,” said Buffy, and took Faith fully in her arms, giving her a soft kiss. “You kicked ass,” she whispered.

“Sure did,” Faith agreed, starry-eyed.

“Please stop,” said Cordelia. “Gag-worthy.”

“Hey, Cordy, I love you,” said Xander suddenly. It felt like something he kinda just really had to say, seeing her there in all her Cordy-ness. The world had almost ended, but Cordelia Chase was mostly just upset about her haircut and excessive PDA—and for some not-so-stupid reason, that made him love her just so much.

Cordelia blinked, peering out from behind Willow. Her hands fluttered to her hair. “But I look the worst right now,” she said breathlessly.

“So?” said Xander.

Cordelia bit her lip, smiling, and ducked her head. “I love you too, loser,” she said, and crossed the room, leaning in to cup Xander’s face in her hands and kiss him. She smelled like burnt hair and demon blood, and Xander felt kind of sick from all the pudding he’d been eating, but none of that took away from the fact that it was the best kiss of his entire life.

“Okay, everybody needs to stop kissing and go to bed,” called Jenny from the couch. “We’ll take it easy tomorrow, but right now I think we all really need a break—”

“I love it when you take charge,” said Giles happily.

Cordelia pulled back, bumping her nose against Xander’s. “Love ya,” she whispered, then giggled, like she almost couldn’t believe she was lucky enough to say it.

“Super glad you’re not dead,” Xander whispered back. “You wanna stay over?”

“Safe sex, kids!” called Jenny, who was shepherding Faith and Buffy up the stairs.

“Thank you for totally ruining that, Ms. Calendar!” Cordelia called back, but tucked her arm into Xander’s anyway.

[walgie]

Generation Wealth, Lauren Greenfield, 2018

I consume contemporary culture in selected bites; perhaps if I were younger and more immersed, I would be less struck by the images that this film focuses on. In the opening credits, there is an excerpt from an interview with Eden Wood age 5 yrs (apparently), who as a toddler became notorious for her Vegas showgirl outfit. I dearly hope that her “money, money, money” chant was part of an act. Then, a porn shoot with an apparently teenage girl. And then a strip club, bare butts wiggling at the bottom of the screen, while the women's faces are outside the frame: depersonalized. The quick glimpses of a variety of shocking scenes garishly foreshadow the horrors to follow.

Greenfield revisits the privileged kids who were the subjects of her 1997 book project "Fast Forward". Juxtaposing archive footage of the teens then with the middle aged adults that they became, the message seems to be that the rich people she encountered failed at parenting. [Note: Greenfield has clips of interviews with her own parents throughout the film, and her mother in particular comes off looking like a bad parent. At first it was a bit discomfiting to have the film maker’s own experiences and family interspersed with the other subjects of the film. But then I realised: she is confessing - accusing herself, perhaps - of being part of this culture, this generation.] How did the rich kids turn out? Eddie still acts like an adolescent towards women. Paris and Mijanou are critical of their experiences as privileged teens.

Throughout the film, analysis is provided mostly by clips of and interview with Chris Hedges and by Greenfield's voice over. But some of the characters who appear in the film perform dual roles, both as a subject of the film and as a commentator. Notorious fraudster and fugitive Florian Holm is one. Between Holm and Hedges, we hear an origin story of the current culture. No new insight: the abandonment of the gold standard (1971), aggressive expansionary monetary policy, and debt-fueled government spending to maintain lifestyle and empire. Reagan-era pivot towards supply side economics and consumption. Suzanne, a hedge fund manager, claims that the unlimited pursuit of wealth is enshrined in the Federalist Papers, but I doubt it. Perhaps she is thinking of the ‘pursuit of happiness’ in the Declaration of Independence?

Corollaries to financial wealth are the experience of luxury and the appearance of wealth. Wealth is restricted to the so-called one percent and the achieving it - absent inheritance - is somewhat obscure and usually involves difficulty. On the other hand, the latter two are easy to portray in the media and easy to offer for sale. In the past, many aspired to the level of wealth of their neighbors, and there really were some opportunities to realize the American dream to “move up in the world”. Now the American dream is dead, and many aspire to the level of luxury and the glitzy appearance of the celebrities who appear on television. Time-share mogul David Siegel explains "Everyone wants to be rich. If they can’t be rich, the next best thing is to feel rich." The rapper named Stunt provides an example: “Poor people are the ones who spend the most money on the 700 dollar shoes, the ones who don’t have it.“

Hedges analyzes the situation bluntly: “things are getting worse... when there is no social mobility, the only social mobility you have is fictitious. The presentation that you give to the rest of the world denies your own reality. I've come to look at mass culture and in particular television  as a form of violence. Because 24 hours a day this ficticious lifestyle - which we’re all told that we can have - fuels this sense of inadequacy.”

The film makes an inevitable segue from wealth and appearance to bodies and sex. Our culture objectifies the body, and fuels our obsession with a "desirable body type". Images originally from pornography are now mainstream. Greenfield shows us some of the effects. A model self-mutilates to “damage the property”. Greenfield’s 17 yr old son Noah: “guys want what’s really demeaning for women.. and to match guys’ expectation I think a lot of women try to replicate it.” A 15 yr old girl construes topless dancing in words that you might expect to hear from someone who training for a marathon or climbing a mountain. “I want to be a dancer- topless dancing showgirl. I think it would be fun - dancing with my tits showing off. If I could accomplish being that, then I could accomplish anything.”

Two stories felt the most devastating. The porn actress Kacey Jordan gained notoriety as Charlie Sheen’s $30K date but her subsequent life sounds like a hellish descent into misery and poverty. Cathy the bus driver embraces the notion that “what really mattered in life was to be in the best body that I could" and so she goes into debt for her cosmetic surgery. And her daughter carves DEAD on her forehead and commits suicide. The film does not explicitly make a connection between the mother’s obsession with physical appearance and the daughter’s suicide, perhaps because it would be too painful. But the connection is implied.

The film ends with some hope. We see some of the teens who were scarred in the 90s and now are parents with healthier priorities: Paris, Mijanou, and Cliff the former rap artist G Mo. Greenfield seems portray Cliff as the happiest person in the film. His daughter has received a full ride scholarship to Cornell. His journey is the most straightforward: from gaudy rapper to his ethos now: “success is showing my children what a strong father looks like, what work ethic looks like... real American dream”.

Contra Dorothy Woodend

I am a fan of Dorothy Woodend. She is a subtle thinker and has an aesthetic that I identify with. But her review of this film, while cleverly written, is far off the mark.

First - a couple of fact checks. She refers to "Kacey Jordan, former girlfriend of Charlie Sheen, who parlayed her brief stint of infamy into a porn career". Actually the starlet started her porn career in 2007 at age 19. By the time of the infamous episode with Charlie Sheen, four years later, she already had a long filmography.

there is Susanne, a hard-faced hedge fund trader who spends the better part of her life building a career, only to decide a child would give her life meaning.

But actually, Suzanne says in an interview that she “always wanted a family”, contrary to how Woodend casts it as a late “decision”.

Aside: another example of lack of basic journalism skills in another article

here

- she can’t even get the spelling of Suchsland straight.

Woodend stoops to spiteful insults; she describes Greenfield’s voice as “Valley girl croak“. The flutes in the soundtrack are “stupid”.

Perhaps Woodend, rather than trying to understand what the film is trying to do, is criticising it for not being the film that she would have made, if she were the film maker. For example, she notes that “there is too much stuff in here”, but also complains that “there is never any discussion about how much it actually costs to attend this prestigious institution [Harvard]”. I agree, the film covers “too much”. And apparently it is not the stuff that Woodend wants to see.

She objects to the sentimentality aroused by the soundtrack.

there is something, even more insidious at work here, and that is sentiment, the cheapest and easiest of emotion to invoke...

All you have to do to figure this out is to pay attention to the musical cues.

The film is literally coated in music, a sticky bukkake of swelling strings, mournful flutes and tinkling pianos. At any point in the narrative, you can close your eyes and understand not only what is being shown, but how you are supposed to feel about it.

But I would say that the film maker intends that the viewer should feel sentiment, and intends that the soundtrack reinforce the scenes unfolding on screen. I would also say that the soundtrack is effective at doing this, and I think this is not a bad thing. Subtle, no; but this is a documentary, not Hitchcock. Perhaps Woodend would have preferred something along the lines of 60 Minutes, dry “investigative journalism”? The film maker is not trying to do that.

Woodend claims that “the film fails in positing even one original thought.“ It’s not clear what she means by “original” in this context; there is certainly a variety of ways that something can be said to be “original”. Perhaps she is using hyperbole; would it really make a difference if there were “one original thought”? Let it be that the analyses that are given in the film have appeared elsewhere. Let it be too that the images that appear on the screen are not substantially different from images that have appeared elsewhere. But as a gestalt, the film displays real creativity and originality.

More criticism from Woodend:

But none of the subjects have much to offer in the way of a larger analysis.

Any more complex understanding of the issues in question is swept away.

The film never digs deeper to look at why the fires of appetite and ambition are stoked to such a white heat, it only records the outcome of these forces.

These comments are accurate, but again seem to miss the point of the film. I don’t the film maker wanted to achieve any of these things, and I doubt that it could be argued that the film has a responsibility to address these issues.

Finally, Woodend raises an excellent question, but oddly refrains from taking a firm stand:

is Greenfield much different from the purveyors of sex tapes...

Chris Hedges... describes the fictional version of social mobility captured in television and other forms of mass media as a form of violence that “fuels a sense of inadequacy.”

I am tempted to include Greenfield’s film in this category, a work that claims to present reality but is in fact another form of fiction

Woodend has not been shy about passing judgement on other aspects of the film, but here she merely admits to being “tempted” to categorize it.

Woodend finishes her review with a misreading of the end of the film

For all its verbiage about separating reality from entertainment, global capitalism destroying culture and the darker future ahead, the film retreats into boneheaded Hallmark card sentiment about parenthood and love as the answer.

The film ends by juxtaposing images of other ideas of success against the preceding plethora of images. “Boneheaded Hallmark card sentiment” might be accurate, but that is something that really exists, so perhaps the question is whether the film is better for showing it. But at least we can say that the film doesn’t try to give the “answer” that Woodend objects to. The final scenes are hardly intended to be an answer; rather, just a bit of hope. Perhaps Woodend expected a tidy ending with an “answer”  akin to the moral at the end of one of Aesop’s fables, but I think both the film and the viewer are better off without one.

[joneswilliam72]

Watch: Music and resistance to drug warrior tyranny – Boiler Room’s To Live and Die in Manila.

I caught up with Angela Stephenson, the director behind To Live and Die in Manila (which you can watch free below), Boiler Room's new short documentary on President Rodrigo Duterte's brutal authoritarianism and extra-judicial killings in the Philippines – of not just drug pushers but users too – and the artists who oppose it using their creative output.

Since becoming president of the Philippines in 2016, Rodrigo Duterte's war on drugs has caused widespread fear and devastation across Manila. Set in one of the world's most dangerous cities, To Live and Die in Manila gives a vital voice to the musicians (particularly artists like Eyedress, Owfuck, BP Valenzuela, Teenage Granny and Jeona Zoleta) putting their life on the line for their right to showcase creativity that their country associates with drug crimes punishable by death.

This is actually the second interview I've done with Stephenson on this project. The first can be read here at CitizenTruth.org – it gets more deeply into the politics and happenings underlying the resistance of these Filipino artists to Duterte's authoritarian rule.

Still from TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA.

For the interview here, Stephenson and I sat down for a chat more about her artistic methods and the actual aesthetic of To Live and Die in Manila – along with the huge challenges of filming such a fundamentally subversive piece in a country where many basic rights have been stripped away.

Catch To Live and Die in Manila – and the interview – below.

TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA.

Hello Angela and welcome to The 405! To start things off, I was hoping we could an idea of your artistic history. What attracted you to film as an art form?

Hi, thank you! I've always been interested in photography, but when I didn't get into my chosen university to study for a photography degree, I put it on the backburner and continued to shoot only as a hobby. I started with doing gig photography for fun, and through that I fell into the music industry. I worked with Boiler Room for several years on their live broadcast team, filming parties all over the world. When they started looking at covering more of the context behind the shows, I expressed an interest in moving into a more storytelling role, and with that I eventually started making documentaries and other short-form pieces, it felt like a natural progression.

What initially inspired you to do To Live and Die in Manila?

I really just wanted to shine a spotlight on the amazing music coming out of Manila. I realised I was in a good position to be able to help put Filipino music culture on the map, but I couldn't do that without addressing the situation in the country that all these artists were subjected to and openly vocal about in a lot of their music.

The visual language of the film really suited the subject matter. Gritty, realistic and this sort of balance between despair and precarious hope (reflected in the musicians and artists too). Could we get a look at your process to get the visuals you did?

I guess it was a case of trying to find the balance between celebrating Filipino culture and capturing the realities of life in Manila. I think despair and hope are feelings that you can flit between on an almost daily basis in Manila. To me, the city is beautiful, colourful, and visually stimulating and I wanted to capture that, but it comes with a lot of hard truths that you need to swallow in order to just go about your day. Accepting the traffic, the poverty, and the underlying feeling of danger is all part of life in the city.

Indeed.

Still from TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA.

The visuals were shot over a period of two years on two different trips to Manila. On one of the trips I met Paco Raterta, who is a very talented director living and working out of Manila, and he lent me a lot of the visuals he used to create the music video for Eyedress's "Manila Ice" single. Snippets of the video are also featured in the film, particularly the scenes depicting the anonymous dead bodies that you see before Den Sy Ty's performance. These are the kind of images you were seeing in the news at the time.

Cool. Any interesting or funny moments stick out from the filming process?

The whole process felt like one big adventure, I'll never forget it. People are always pretty curious when you're out filming on the streets. I remember being asked angrily by a stranger if I was a journalist when I jumped out of the car to quickly film the posters depicting Duterte as Hitler. People are very sensitive to criticism of the president, and the Philippines is considered the deadliest country in Asia to be a journalist, they're often killed in their line of work and the current government is very keen on silencing Duterte's detractors, so it was sobering to feel threatened for just trying to capture footage in the street.

Really heroic what journalists do in fundamentally authoritarian countries like the Philippines under Duterte.

The part where Owfuck talks about taking acid as part of their creative writing process used footage shot in the red light district, it's quite a common place for people to shoot in because of all the neon lights.

Still from TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA showing a scene from the city's interior.

I bet. The realism it brought added greatly to the atmosphere.

I shot it on a big Russian 16mm camera that I bought second hand, and I hadn't inserted the film correctly so all the footage from that day came back fucked up. It ended up being a total blessing in disguise as it actually visually reflected an acid trip quite accurately.

Gotta love those kind of happy accidents. What were the other challenges like?

Taking what is not a popular stance on the government was always going to be challenging. My Filipino mother falls into the majority of the population, being a supporter of Duterte, and I kept the entire process a secret from her until the film was finished. When I eventually sent her the final edit, she was really upset by it. The fact that I had to release the film knowing it could put a strain on our relationship was a burden, but I knew that her view would be shared by a lot of Filipinos, and it prepared me for any criticism to come, from people who would be unhappy by the way the country and the president had been depicted.

Wow yeah.

The criticism just proves how much this film and more like it are really needed, there's a cognitive shift that needs to take place in order for a lot of Filipinos to sympathise with the people whose lives are being affected by the issues discussed here. Jess Kohl's Anarchy in the Philippines film, which was a great portrayal of a punk community in Manila and Tarlac reacting to the war on drugs, also suffered the same fate in the comments section.

Still from TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA.

My challenge was inevitably having to challenge a Filipino audience to put their pride aside. This film isn't about blaming Duterte for everything, it's about asking ourselves what attitudes we're reinforcing by allowing our leader to condemn an entire group of people to death, instead of effectively engaging with the affected communities and helping tackle the problem from the root. It's about what example we're setting for ourselves and the next generation, who have only ever been taught that life is cheap in the Philippines.

That gets excellently into another pertinent question. What do you hope will be the main takeaway for people from the film?

I hope that the film engages young Filipinos in the Philippines and around the world, there's a lot of people out there like me who don't believe that we're going in the right direction, that the government is taking shortcuts to tackle a very complex problem.

I am as well, by the way.

Giving the artists in the film a platform to express how they feel and respond to their surroundings is just one small thing I could do to allow people to see how they're being affected directly and indirectly, how they're suffering mentally from living in a society that doesn't place enough value on human lives. We need to strive for a more peaceful society, and it's possible to leave behind the culture of violence that's been passed down from previous governments, but only if we collectively choose to move away from what is deeply rooted classism and seek the truth without prejudice.

Agreed.

The freedom to live without fear is something we should all be entitled to, not just the privileged few who can ignore the problem because they're happy to live under an increasingly authoritarian regime that only sacrifices the freedoms of those considered below them.

Music and art are pretty profound things in terms of their ability to effect social change. What can our readers do – if anything – to help in that?

I feel lucky to have been given the opportunity to talk about what's going on, I think people just being aware of the issues is important, especially in an age of fake news and the government trying to cover its tracks to deny any wrongdoing.

Still from TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA.

Couldn't agree more. It's a scourge really.

Duterte's style of leadership is hugely controversial and that also makes it distracting. Showing support for the journalists, photojournalists, musicians and artists who are often putting their lives or careers on the line to criticise the government, will hopefully go a long way. Their efforts can't be for nothing, and there's few people in the country actually taking them seriously. I urge people interested in this topic to look into the work of Filipinos like Maria Ressa, who has just been named as one of Time's people of year alongside other journalists from around the world. And Ezra Acayan, who is a photographer that has been on the ground documenting the suffering of the families who have lost loved ones to the war on drugs since its inception.

Absolutely. Real journalists need support now more than ever.

One question I ask everybody, what films and directors do you consider most pivotal on forming your outlook as a visual artist?

Y Tu Mamá También by Alfonso Cuarón has been one of my favourite films since I was a teenager, and it was special in the way that it was not only adventurous, beautifully shot, and emotionally stirring but also subtly captured the political and economic realities of Mexico at the time and the classist tension between the two main protagonists.

Watching LoveTrue by Alma Har'el was also quite pivotal for me, she blurred the lines between documentary and narrative in such a fascinating way and you could really feel just how involved she was in the lives of her subjects during the filming process.

Still from TO LIVE AND DIE IN MANILA.

And visually, Robby Müller's cinematography has always inspired me. I actually filmed the Manila sunset scene at the beginning of To Live and Die in Manila for another short film I was making based in the city, but when Eyedress said "to live and die in Manila" during our interview, I had to pull it from the other film to use as a tribute to Müller’s work on the opening credits of To Live and Die in LA, it felt quite serendipitous.

Wow. Very fitting. What makes a great film? And what makes a great documentary?

Personally I'm very visually driven, so the cinematography has to be considered and captivating.

Absolutely.

I think first and foremost however I'm quite emotional so I love films that evoke any feelings that I can relate to but can also introduce me to new feelings, and I appreciate any film that can do this by taking me out of the comfort of reality, even if only for a brief moment. While I think documentaries absolutely benefit from having an impartial view and a lot of them need this in order to tell a story accurately, I also think there's a special place for documentaries where you can feel the director has worked alongside the subjects to really express their point of view – that takes a lot of empathy.

Definitely. Have to get in the thick of it – as you did here – to get something really compelling. Finally, what's next for you?

I hope to continue making films that both celebrate and critique different aspects of Filipino culture. Everyone you meet there has an interesting story to tell and I'd like to depict some of these in both documentary and narrative film formats. It's also worth exploring the huge population of overseas Filipinos – there's a lot of issues surrounding the treatment of domestic workers abroad for example. Eyedress and I also made a music video together after meeting and working on this film, so I'd like to form more relationships with artists and make videos together that way too.

Stephenson directed this Eyedress video.

from The 405 http://bit.ly/2sQgxLS

[tendance-news]

NASHVILLE – When Kirsten Anderson submitted a memo detailing her concerns about sexual harassment at the Iowa Capitol, she expected comments about women in the office – their sex lives, breast sizes and the length of skirts worn by teenage pages – to stop.

Instead, Anderson was fired seven hours later from her job with the Iowa Republican Senate Caucus.

After four years of litigation that ended in September, the state agreed to pay $1.75 million to settle her claim, leaving taxpayers footing the bill. Her case is among the first in a recent wave of high-profile sexual harassment cases that have roiled state legislatures around the nation, highlighting the moral and financial liability states faces as claims pile up.

Since last year, at least 40 lawmakers – nearly all men – in 20 states have been publicly accused by more than 100 people of some form of sexual misconduct or harassment, a USA TODAY NETWORK analysis found.

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The total, which doesn’t include confidential or anonymous complaints or government staffers who have been accused of sexual misdeeds, reflects unprecedented levels of scrutiny on statehouses across the country.

Swift action has been taken against high-profile men, including Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein, and others accused of sexual harassment. There have been varying degrees of punishment for lawmakers. 

Two weeks ago, Kentucky House Speaker Jeff Hoover resigned from his leadership position amid growing pressure over a report that he settled a sexual harassment complaint made by a staff member.

Florida's Senate president earlier this month ordered an investigation into allegations that Sen. Jack Latvala, who is running for governor, made inappropriate comments or touched six women. Latvala has denied the claims.

Earlier this year, Rep. Mark Lovell, a freshman Tennessee lawmaker, resigned amid allegations of sexual harassment. The resignation followed last year's expulsion of former Rep. Jeremy Durham, who had inappropriate sexual contact with at least 22 women, according to an attorney general's investigation.

The ways lawmakers have handled sexual harassment and assault allegations has left some experts looking for change. 

“The consequence must fit the transgression,” said Jennifer A. Drobac, an Indiana University law professor and expert on sexual harassment cases. “You have to withdraw the privileges, kick them out of Congress or out of the statehouse. Take away the privileges of their employ and their health care benefits.” 

Debbie Dougherty, a professor in the Department of Communication at the University of Missouri who has written several reports on sexual harassment, said the latest wave of sexual harassment allegations against powerful men follows a slow but steady stream of similar accusations against officials at FOX News, Uber and the National Park Service.

“It’s like a stone rolling downhill. You see some and then you see some more and then you see a lot,” said Dougherty.

“The problem has been ignored and minimized for so, so many years that I think we’re just seeing the tip of the iceberg.”

Power unchecked

Behavior at statehouses, long dominated by male lawmakers, has been thrust into the national spotlight as employees come forward to spell out an entrenched culture of sexual harassment.

This year, both Democrats and Republicans are facing accusations of misdeeds at nearly two dozen state capitols. They include Arizona, California, Colorado, Florida, Illinois, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Missouri, New Hampshire, Nevada, New York, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Tennessee, Vermont and Washington.

In Arizona, eight women have accused Rep. Don Shooter of making sexually charged comments, touching them inappropriately or making unwanted sexual advances.

In Illinois and California, hundreds of people — including legislators, lobbyists and legislative staffers — signed letters alleging widespread sexual harassment in state politics.

Some efforts already are underway to address the problem. 

Illinois lawmakers appointed a former federal prosecutor to serve as a watchdog regarding sexual harassment at the Capitol.

Other states that have yet to see revelations of alleged sexual harassment by lawmakers have begun taking action. Several, including Wisconsin, North Dakota, Arkansas and Alaska, are working to change their sexual harassment policies.

Texas leaders have also called for a review of the legislature's sexual harassment policies after reports of widespread harassment. 

Genevieve Cato, who worked for a female legislator in Texas before joining an abortion rights advocacy group, said she struggled with whether to confront a male colleague who frequently gazed at her breasts while working in the Capitol.

“I have never experienced anything like that before in a professional capacity,” she said. “I was totally surprised and completely unprepared and it just kept happening. It happened so much that I started to feel vulnerable and exposed and like I wanted to cover myself up.”

Cato said she was concerned that reporting it could isolate her and hurt her future in politics, but the interactions began affecting her focus at work. She often made excuses to leave the office so she could call her dad and cry over the phone, she said.

White House aides walk tightrope on Roy Moore, refusing to denounce him or his accusers

'Me too' movement renews Equal Rights Amendment push

In 2016, a friend shared with her The Burn Book of Bad Men, an online spreadsheet that features stories of harassment, discrimination and other problem behaviors by men in Texas politics. 

Cato typed her story into the list, which today contains about 60 anecdotes. 

“It felt like a place where I could finally find some justice and a place where I could say what had happened to me without having to be afraid of retaliation or it affecting my job or anything like that,” she said. “Carrying these secrets around just weighs you down.”

Laura Palumbo, communications director for the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, said the sudden national discussion has given victims and others a new sense of security.

“I think that the level of attention that is currently on the issue of sexual harassment really does point us to a watershed moment where more victims are feeling comfortable coming forward with reports.”

Ending the silence

Women make up less than one-quarter of all state lawmakers, according to the National Conference of State Legislatures. That puts many female lobbyists, staffers, interns and others at the professional and political mercy of mainly male lawmakers, who historically hold leadership posts and can quietly brush aside allegations of sexual improprieties. 

Chris Mooney, director of the Institute of Government and Public Affairs at the University of Illinois-Springfield, said he would “bet the farm” that sexual harassment is happening in most statehouses.

“This is a structural situation that’s the same in each state where you’ve got a lot of independent power controlled by men arbitrarily and they’ve got stuff they can give and some of them are willing to use it,” Mooney said.

Experts say women who are victims of sexual harassment and assault are often reticent to come forward for a variety of reasons, ranging from fear of having their personal life scrutinized to being re-victimized.

The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission estimates anywhere from 25 to 85 percent of women experience sexual harassment at work. The EEOC also found the vast majority of harassment goes unreported.

In legislatures, where staffers, lawmakers and lobbyists intermingle both inside and outside statehouses, reporting harassment is further complicated by the fact that it is often unclear to whom victims should turn.  

But, experts say, the traditional hurdles of speaking out about sexual harassment has begun to change, in part due to fallout from scandals surrounding Weinstein and other prominent men accused of misconduct. Still, much needs to be done to address the issue, they say.

“When we see lawmakers grabbing and groping people or paying people off in secret to keep quiet about abuse that is not indicative of an evolved society,” said Drobac, the Indiana University professor. “We need to move beyond this Wild West, ‘I’m going to indulge all my passions��� society and start living to a higher level.”

Dougherty, the University of Missouri professor, said while it can be hard to break a culture of sexual harassment in institutions, it can be done through implementing better policies and training. There also needs to be a shift in behavior, she said.

“You have to change the way people interact with each other,” said Dougherty. “Trying to shift behavioral patterns so they match our desired values is really hard word. It’s complex and it takes a committed upper level management to make it happen.”

[cinephiled-com]

New Post has been published on Cinephiled

New Post has been published on http://www.cinephiled.com/interview-scott-hamilton-kennedy-looks-science-gmos-informative-food-evolution/

Interview: Scott Hamilton Kennedy Looks at the Science of GMOs in Informative ‘Food Evolution’

Amidst a brutally polarized debate marked by passion, suspicion, and confusion, Food Evolution, by Academy Award-nominated director Scott Hamilton Kennedy (The Garden, Fame High, OT: Our Town) explores the controversy surrounding GMOs and food. Traveling from Hawaiian papaya groves to banana farms in Uganda to the cornfields of Iowa, the film, narrated by esteemed science communicator Neil deGrasse Tyson, wrestles with the emotions and the science driving one of the most heated arguments of our time. In the GMO debate, both pro and anti camps claim science is on their side. Who’s right?

This riveting documentary shows how easily misinformation, confusion, and fear can overwhelm objective analysis. How do we ensure that our food supply is safe, and that everyone has enough to eat? How do we feed the world while also protecting the planet? Has genetic engineering increased or decreased pesticide use? Are GMO foods bad for your health? And, most importantly, what data, evidence, and sources are we using to approach these important questions? Enlisting experts from around the world, this documentary separates the hype and emotion from the science and data to unravel the debate around food, and help audiences reach their own conclusions. I spoke to Scott Hamilton Kennedy about this very informative film.

Danny Miller: This is the documentary I was hoping someone would make. As liberal as I am, I’ve long worrid that the anti-GMO people were painting with too broad of a brush. It seemed like there were situations where the science of genetic modification could help immeasurably with certain problems facing the world.

Scott Hamilton Kennedy: I’m happy to hear you say that. Look, I live in Silverlake and in my circles, if you don’t follow the word “Monsanto” with the phrase “evil motherfuckers,” the conversation is over — and it gets worse from there!

Yeah, Silverlake is probably Ground Zero for the anti-GMO movment.

It is! But luckily, it’s also full of amazingly smart, creative people who want to have intelligent conversations — people who love data and science — and Neil deGrasse Tyson.

Now that we’re in this age of Trump, there are so many parts of the conversation that seem even trickier.

It’s true. But we can’t have our kale, and eat it too! We can’t say “Oh, those bastards with their alternative facts” when we’re promoting our own alternative facts in this area.

Yeah. I know that some of the same people who attended the recent March for Science here, as I did, who were screaming about the Trump administration’s denial of global warming, are refusing to engage with the scientific community on this subject. I think the research you present in your film is very compelling.

It’s not like I’m trying to present it as a matter of “sides,” like a “GMO side” and an “organic side.” It’s way more nuanced than that. This film is about food and science and the very daunting task of trying to feel a world population that will soon be up to nine billion people. I’ve seen so many very smart people yelling at each other while the facts getting swept up in controversy. I’m just trying to present a pro-science approach to the topic.

I get how complex it is. It’s not that I put my trust in companies like Monsanto or think they only have our best interests in mind, I don’t believe that for a second. On the other hand, I can’t discount the work that many people are doing around the world to help really serious problems, like the amazing work you show that’s happening with farmers of bananas and papayas. I mean, talk about “white privilege,” how dare we not allow people in developing countries to take advantage of the latest scientific research if it would really help them.

As we discuss in the film, we all know that we have “confirmation bias,” the tendency to only use data that confirms our existing beliefs, but we really need to check that. I’m all for questioning authority, speaking truth to power, I love those things, they’ve given me passion and purpose every day of my life, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have to tread carefully to not go too far. Of course there are things to worry about in this area. Greed is a bitch, money and power can be very dangerous, we have to have checks and balances, but we can’t throw the baby out with the bathwater or just engage in fearmongering.

Having Neil deGrasse Tyson is a big deal for a film like this. He has such credibility that it almost made me listen to the information in a different way.

He’s earned that trust! Neil is an amazing science communicator, an amazing researcher, and he knows and respects the scientific method. I’m very honored to have him in the film and it’s been such a pleasure to work with somebody that smart and funny.

Of course you have to know that this film will probably get a lot of criticism in certain quarters. Are you already girding yourself for attack? For people who question your motives or who’s funding you?

Oh, it’s happening, they’re definitely coming after us. But again, it’s very interesting in the time of Trump. You don’t just get to call me a shill, you don’t just get to say that Neil DeGrasse Tyson is a shill, you’ve got to show your data. You can’t just say, “I saw something on the Internet so I know what is true,” you need to have repeatable data and multiple sources. There are some people in the food movement who are already aligning themselves against this film and by doing that they’re aligning themselves with the fringe. I know they don’t agree with a lot of those people but they’re so troubled by their confirmation bias that they just can’t accept some of this research. They can’t accept any world view that goes against their beliefs.

It reminds me of the left equivalent of some of the Republicans who are selling their souls down the river because they’re afraid to come out against Trump. And then they find themselves in bed with people with whom they really do not agree.

It’s true. But if you look at the spectrum, the extremes on both the left and the right have a lot in common. There’s very little dialogue, it’s all “my way” or “fuck you.” We’re living in a time of a lot of chaos.

Like all the controversy and strange bedfellows among people who are wary of vaccines.

Totally, it’s the same thing. I can see how easy it is to have someone or something to blame for challenging situations, to have some kind of “answer.” But sometimes there isn’t a simple answer and there is real science to look at.

Well, even if some extremists think you’re on a corporate payroll somewhere, I think a film like this can really move the conversation forward in a big way.

Fingers crossed! I am encouraged by the screenings we’ve had so far. I usually do this very unscientific poll where I ask the crowd before the screening, “How many people fear GMOs for themselves and their families?” We tend to get a lot of hands in the air. In New York, about 25% of the hands went up. After the screening, when I asked that question again, only a few hands went up. That’s really exciting to me, even though in some cities it’s not that big of a change. But after the film, when I ask “How many people feel that farmers in Africa should have the right to use some of these fixes to solve their banana problem,” almost all of the hands go up.

It’s such a tricky issue and the conversations I’ve seen get heated very fast.

Bill Maher said some horrible things about GMOs on his show a few years back and Neil deGrasse Tyson called him on it. “Why are you so against GMOs? They are doing amazing things to help starving people in Africa.” Maher’s response was, “Well, I’m not a starving person in Africa.” I mean, come on, we need to better than that!

And what’s up with Dr. Oz? I used to respect that guy but now he seems like such a crackpot. I was shocked by some of the clips you showed in the film.

Yeah, and the clip of John Oliver taking him down is fantastic. I don’t know Dr. Oz and I certainly don’t want to discount him as a human being, he seems like a kind enough soul, but clearly there’s a lot of evidence that the man has used alternative facts to sell his TV show.

Food Evolution is currently in theaters in New York and Los Angeles and will be opening in other cities soon.