#but also doing that i'm pretty sure he'd been Fought For like. about the same amount. so the 'what is going ON' sentiment remains | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

moonmeg · 7 months ago

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"Micah!"

His ears twitched up as his name echoed through the halls in the familiar voice of Vivian. He looked up from his notes and traced the sounds of jogging shoes back until he spotted her. Not that it was hard to spot her this time. The hallway was nearly empty. The only students still around were those taking extra classes specifically set up for graduees-to-be. He himself didn't attend those classes but a friend, whom he agreed to help out with here and there after school, was. Micah used the uncanny silence of the hour to go through his own notes and books once more so this evening he could enjoy his room without sitting behind the desk or on the floor desperately forcing knowledge into his brain.

It was odd, he thought. Robyn used to be the help-out guy in the friend group. He was the smart guy. And now as he wasn't a student anymore, those same friends came to Micah. They deemed him a sufficient enough replacement. Micah didn't mind much, he was just not used to it. Granted, he also didn't expect to be the new smart guy in the group. "Smart" was rarely one of the first adjectives people used to describe him. "Kind", "pretty" or "handsome", "fun", "good", "badmouthed", "reserved", "loyal"... those were more attributed to him by people who weren't his family or Robyn. "Smart" would come up sooner or later but it was barely ever people's immediate association. "Smart" was Robyn's adjective. Now it had been forced onto Micah as if everyone suddenly realized he didn't just have an intelligent heart but had an intelligent brain too.

It was odd.

"To what do I have the pleasure, Ms. Student Council President?" Micah placed his fist under his chin and smirked at the girl he never thought he'd call friend one day.

"I'm really sorry I'm catching you in your studies like this. I missed my opportunities earlier." Vivian began slowly calming her breath again from the physical activity. Micah ensured her it was alright. Vivian took a deep breath and looked up at Micah. She straightened her back and asked away:

"Where's Robyn? He wasn't in for the entire week. Is he sick? Did something happen? It's not like him to be gone for so long without a word! I'm starting to worry."

"Oh, did he not reach out to ye?" Micah's smile dropped.

"I haven't heard of him since last week."

Vivian's face was one of genuine concern. Missing classes so shortly before final examinations was a way to lose the participation allowance in the worst case. She was sure Robyn wouldn't risk that and perhaps she just missed the information that he was sick. She decided to ask Micah for closure. Surely he must know what the matter was. He was closest to Robyn on multiple levels.

"I'm sorry, I thought maybe as Student Council or Robyn's friend ye'd know already..." Micah closed the book in his hands carefully. "He decided to drop out."

"What?!" Vivian burst out. Her posture fell again as she leaned towards Micah with bent knees. Before she could say or ask anything more, Micah provided her with what he knew.

"There's no progress on the magic situation. He said he's not allowed to use glyphs but wi'out them or Snowball he has no magic at all. He couldn't participate in the practical exams. The theoretical part barely counts. He decided it's best if he left."

"And you let him?!" Vivian grabbed Micah by his shoulders and pulled him closer to her. Micah immediately fought her off. He jerked her hands off his shoulders and leaned back towards the window.

"What was I supposed to do? He had already signed the documents when he came to talk with me about it. Telling him to enroll again would only have led to a fight that I canna win. He's right isn't he? He's powerless wi'out glyphs but he's not allowed to use them. Is Robyn supposedta take theoretical exams that he knows willna get him to graduation anyways? What then?" he argued.

Vivian stared at Micah for a few seconds before she processed what he had said. Her lips thinned and her blue eyes started searching for something on the floor. She found that she had no answer to his question... What then? What could Robyn have done other than drop out?

Vivian sat down on the windowsill beside Micah. Her head hung low, a strand of her long green hair fell over her shoulder and her hands were clasped together in her lap.

Micah eyed her. He thought he understood what Vivian was thinking right now too well. Robyn's decision was a difficult one to accept, but neither had any counter arguments that would be convincing enough to make him reconsider. The alternatives were shit. This was a dilemma situation: No matter what path you choose, it ends badly.

He leaned his head back until the window hindered it at going any further.

"It hurts me to see him this miserable and speakin' of self-hatred. It hurts me immensely because that is the boy I love so deeply. I see the world in him and I want him to be nothing but happy. But had I tried to convince him otherwise, I would've only made him feel like he's made a mistake. That's the last thing he needs." Micah said quietly.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're right." Vivian sighed. "This is just so unfair! He's worked so hard and now all of it is to dissolve into nothing? We must do something!"

"Vi, I believe being there for Robyn is both of our priorities right now." he turned his head to her slightly.

"Obviously." Vivian mirrored his head turn in his direction. "I'll stop by his house right after the council meeting. But I can't sit around here and do nothing about his drop-out either!"

"Tell me 'bout it." Micah scoffed. He crossed his arms and turned his head back to face the hallway. "If only there was a way to let him graduate properly. Or an honorary something! Extraordinary Student Award or Student of the Year or some shite like that!"

Vivian slapped her hand on his thigh suddenly. It startled him for a second but he turned to look at her. Vivian was smiling at him with her lips but her eyes weren't smiling aswell. It looked a little off - almost had something creepy about it. Had he said something wrong? Was it because he said "shite"? Alright, it was against school rules to use vulgar language and that included swear words but Vivian wasn't that strict about it. She never cared about it before. Not even when he used harsher cuss words than a harmless "shite".

"Micah! You're a genius!" Vivian grabbed his shoulders again and shook him. Since Micah was clearly broader and heavier than her, she only managed to shake his torso lightly. It was more a sway than a shake and it looked quite silly.

"Glad ye finally noticed." Micah commented dryly.

"I'm not sure if we can have him graduate without him taking the exams but nowhere is it said that we can't hand out a Student of the Year title!!" Vivian leaned closer to him and beamed at him in her newly found confidence. She began seriously gripping his shoulders, digging her fingertips in, as if the thought would leave her if she let Micah go but flourish more the tighter she held him. It started to feel unpleasant. He was about to open his mouth to ask her to let loose a little but Vivian beat him to it and let him go. She jumped up from the windowsill and explained her plan further.

"I'll bring the idea up at Council meeting today! Then I'll talk to Principal Hand! If I can convince the council, we can present and defend Robyn's case together and proclaim him Student of the Year!"

"Ye'd do that?"

Vivian turned around and stared at Micah like he had offended her.

"Robyn is my friend. If I can use my position in school politics to give him the acknowledgement he deserves, I'll gladly do so!"

"Ye're not scared people will complain ye're abusing yer power?" Micah cocked his eyebrow with a smirk. He knew Vivian cared what others thought of her and he knew that she'd hate to be accused of abusing her position as Student Council President. It was a tease between friends. He knew she'd interpret it as such.

"They can complain and whine to their hearts content, I'm gone in a month anyway. Besides, that's Novell family tradition." Vivian tossed her hair back and rolled her eyes.

Micah was actually baffled at her response. It was no secret the Novell family played dirty and had a few cases of rumored power abuse but to hear Vivian, who despised being associated with her family, owning up to this family trait left him speechless. Even if if was only acted, which he assumed it was.

"That didn't sound as badass as I wanted it to, did it?

"Not at all."

"Nevermind that." Vivian clapped her hands together and beamed at Micah as she prepared to make her idea a reality. "I'll keep you updated!"

"Rad, thanks, Vi." he smiled.

"Keep this whole idea a secret though! I'm thinking we should make it a surprise on graduation day." she said over her shoulder with a wink.

"My lips are sealed." Micah mimed pulling a zipper over his mouth and locking it with a key, which he then burned in a flame on his palm.

Vivian gave him a nod of approval and then waved goodbye as she headed to the Council meeting room.

Micah waved back and followed her with his eyes until she was out of sight. He chuckled over how wrong he had been about her. He used to hate her guts and he had cursed Titan into oblivion when he was forced to work with her for the construction magic course but he had judged her way too fast. He understood why Robyn still kept in touch with her even after rejecting her. Vivian was a good friend. He really grew a liking to her over this last school year. And this whole Student of the Year thing was one of the reasons why. She'd pull every lever she can to get Robyn some kind of acknowledgement. As Robyn's boyfriend that made Micah happy. It was proof others cared too and that no one (safe for a few vain people) thought he didn't belong here.

He opened his book again and was about to continue his revision on advanced abomination magic when suddenly he heard his name being yelled again.

"Mike!! Thanks for waiting! Course ended earlier. You ready to help me with taming some beasts?"

Well, there goes his study-free evening at home.

#when meg can't draw she writes a lot 👍#here's some non-angst #but!! long awaited micah and vivian interaction!!#tdaac #micah bower #vivian novell

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pencileraser1 · 1 year ago

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u were keatposting in my asks. now i must do the same in yours since my brain is so obviously filled with him. share ur keating thoughts i know theyre hiding in there!!!!!!!!

i'm just gonna thoughtsdump about this it might not be coherent?but here we go

a lot of my keating thoughts are kind of depressing uh

i think the really tragic thing about this movie (or one of them i guess) is that in the end basically everything that happened likely didn't matter enough in the long term. and one of the biggest losses is that i kind of do think that after keating left, almost none of the students would continue to apply what he taught them. the biggest exceptions to this would be todd and sort of half charlie, i do pretty much agree with the post canon idea that it's likely that todd would end up an english teacher. and i think that he's probably the only person who would genuinely continue to actually apply what keating taught him. charlie i think would continue to be rebellious for a bit longer and then eventually sort of fall in line with what his parents wanted from him in the end, the best outcome is probably that he'd go on to be some sort of artist but i don't think it's super likely that that's what he'd do long term/all the time if that makes sense. for the rest of the poets, i think they'd all go back to how they were before pre-keating. i think you mentioned that neil was really the person who understood keatings lessons the best, which i agree with, and him dying likely prevented the rest of the poets from really getting it before keating left. basically my thought about this is that at the end of the movie, todd and keating are both fundamentally changed, but the rest of the poets aren't, and how much they were able to change is not enough to create a lasting impact.

on a lighter note someone said that possibly the most impressive mark of what keating did was that hopkins stood up on the desk at the end. and while i think that the combination of todd being able to stand up on his desk first, and how keating and neil made it possible to do so is more impressive, i think it maybe comes in in close second for me (i know i just went on a tangent about this not mattering that much but it did matter a little bit and this is still very impressive. like the guy shown to be the Most skeptical stood on the desk that's a lot)

i've seen a theory floating around every once in a while that keating's experience with the first dead poets society might have been similar to what happened with neil, like he had a friend in the society who also committed suicide, and i kind of don't like that theory very much? i guess there are a few elements to it, the biggest being that if someone died the first time, i don't think that keating would even entertain the thought of restarting it. and the second is that i honestly think we could come up with something a lot more interesting.

keating went to welton during ww2, (there's a small possible plothole/timeline issue which is that nolan tells keating he taught english "way before you're time," per the annual, keating begun attending welton in 1941, when nolan was probably about 40 and i suspect not principal since there isn't really any familiarity between the two. my personal theory which i actually really like now that i'm thinking about it is that nolan wasn't at welton from 1941-1944 for some reason, probably ww2 related. not sure Exactly how, nolan's old enough that it's unlikely he would've actually fought unless he had been in the military before, but that could also be interesting, idk there's a lot of possibilities) the us joined ww2 at the end of 1941 so for almost the entire time keating was in school, that would have been going on. and i think that would have put a very unique type of stress on the school and i think it would be really interesting to think about the poet's experience during that time. what i do think happened in lieu of someone dying is probably that they got in some significant amount of trouble at some point, or possibly that they didn't exactly get in trouble but that there was some other issue related to the administration.

other interesting details from the annual: keating was varsity soccer captain and editor of the school annual, likely how he got dps under his name. also btw keating was the soccer coach during the movie if that wasn't clear since the soccer team is. just keatings class minus cameron whose doing fencing. and i only realized this after reading the book (which i do not reccomend if you want to read the book just read the old script it's got all the same stuff and i honestly think the writings better in the script)

anyways i think we should come up with more theories about the original dead poets. bc i think that could be interesting.

i think we were kind of talking about the keating/neil parallels a bit and i'm just gonna talk more about that as well bc i'm a bit insane about it. so like as previously mentioned!!! neil is the one who fundamentally understood keating the most probably (todd and charlie also understood keating but in different ways kind of??? and i think you've spoken about this before too) and there's a lot of like; keating likely starting the original dps/neil starting dps 2.0, both being editors of the school annual (sort of), both encouraging people (todd) to express themselves in ways they might not have thought possible

the way keating and neil's storylines end are also similar. they both set out with a specific goal and while they are successful at first, they are both stopped in ways that are ultimately kind of catastrophic. not fully coherent about this yet but. wanted to add it.

also just wanted to briefly mention keating and mcallister bc i really liked their relationship, all of m thoughts have already been said but i just wanted to add that

keating is in a position where he understands what his students are going through in a way that none of the other teachers do and throughout the movie i honestly think his goal was at least partially just to make their lives just a little bit better. like some of his students would get it and some wouldn't, but for all of them they have one class where the teacher is nice and not as strict or exhausting or gives them ridiculous amounts of homework. and even if keating is just. the one class that's a little bit easier. that still probably helps so much with how the environment at welton was. obviously keatings ultimate goal was probably to teach his students to think for themselves and about what they specifically want but i think the smaller impacts of like. ok here's one class where the teacher isn't a hardass is meaningful too.

#i'm obsessed with narritive foils and parallels between characters to like a slightly riddiculous degree #i didn't think i had that much to say but i've written this much so here we are i guess i did have things to say #john keating #neil perry #todd anderson #dps #dead poets society #hopefully coherent

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thotsforvillainrights · 1 year ago

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Okay hear me out so I was watching the “Hazbin Hotel” series that is streaming on prime video and as I was watching the show I got to thinking? What is the? LOV had a S/O whose quirk is similar to Alastor the radio demon from Hazbin Hotel (S/O has a regular voice, but only uses Alistair radio voice only for show)

and the first time they fought against the heroes or the MLA (re-Destro’s army) and they saw S/O’s transform into there, demon form (because that’s part of their quirk) and the LOV were like “that is terrifying, but also amazing at the same time!” And it made them fall even more in love with their S/O😅

I haven't watched this show to be honest. I remember only seeing the original (which I think is the pilot?) way back a few years on YouTube. I'm hearing the pilot I saw wasn't even canon but whatever, it's all I got to go by haha. From what I can remember, he seemed to be super strong and creepy but also pretty funny here and there. I see things on social media about the show but it's mostly videos of the songs and cosplays. Anyway, wish me luck because I did no further research for this and I'm sorry lol)

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up|drabble

-Impressed but a little scared: Surely Compress will tell you outright after witnessing you in action, that he's impressed (and whispers that he's a little scared). Up until this point you probably didn't display the full ability of your quirk. You never felt the need to and (yes, I'm capping your power) after using it you need to recharge for some days and possibly a week or so. It was a 'use fully only when needed' kind of power. He's not sleeping with one eye open, but he knows if you ever for whatever reason decided to do so that you could eliminate him and everyone around him. The danger never scared him too much. Twice knows you won't hurt him, but he also is careful not to step out of line. It's not like you don't love him as much as he does you...it's just that if one day you decided to turn against the villains then he knows he wouldn't be safe. This is BEFORE he harnessed his ability. Afterward he's a little more secure. Also is more than impressed and proud of you!

-In complete awe: (and yes I know Kurogiri wasn't available for the battle but if he were then you'd get a lot of praise from him) Spinner would have a small jaw-drop moment when he'd seen you pull your power out. He probably didn't know it could be so intimidating! He probably feels a small swell in his chest thinking of the bit of pride he has for you already increasing by the day. Then again, Spinner is proud of you for anything you do no matter what. Also in complete would likely be Magne too. She's going to be your biggest fan even if you were quirkless, but she assumed the opposite considering your voice changing on a whim. Feel bad for everyone else having to listen to her brag about you on a daily basis!

-Doesn't care and means it: No offense but Dabi likely doesn't care all that much. I mean, yeah he's slightly impressed but you won't see him fanboying over you or anything. However, your ability does make him take a second to look over his own. Perhaps he'll ask you to go toe to toe with him one of these days. Just be easy on him! Muscular is more along the lines of 'it aint shit unless you can beat me in a fight with it'. He challenges you just about everyday. He's pretty cocky to be honest. Refuses to admit you could possibly be stronger than him even if it's true. Not to be rude or anything but Moonfish doesn't care what your ability is or is not. All he really cares about it you. Which could both be an 'awe' or 'oh...' moment depending on who you are as a person. He doesn't mean anything negative by it! Just doesn't care is all.

-ACTS like they don't care but actually does: Shigaraki would pretend as much as he wants to but everyone knows he's rather amazed by you. He's always been this way with everything in the relationship concerning you. He's not all that open with you when it comes to how he feels. It's not till later in the relationship that he ends up opening more and more for you. So at the beginning "Yeah it's kind of cool I suppose but it really doesn't concern me in the least bit what power you have. It's about how you use it to benefit us and our organization." Then later it transforms into you being his heavy hitter on the team. He's conflicted between putting you on the frontlines because of your power and wanting to keep you safe near him instead.

#bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #lov #league of villains #headcanons

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pain-is-too-tired · 11 months ago

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Great now I'm thinking about Clarisse and Michael again.

We know from Michael's interaction with Percy later at Williamsburg Bridge that after Clarisse still refused to join the fight after getting the chariot, that he said some "choice words"

Knowing him, probably cussed her out a bit gdgdg

But honestly, I'm imagining him also calling her out on caring too much about her pride than lives

Because, for all the fighting to keep the chariot,we don't really know what was happening between getting the chariot and BoM. Other than Beckendorf's death.

And we see Michael's pride isn't something that he's completely obsessed with. If anything, his pride seems to be centered more on his cabin than himself. We don't know what it took to get the chariot, but I'm sure his cabin fought hard in the battle. Of course he'd want to keep it, his siblings earned that.

Clarisse's seems a little more focused on her own pride or the image of her cabin. She led the battle, so she thinks that the Chariot should be hers. Despite the fact they probably wouldn't have the Chariot if the Apollo cabin hadn't taken it, and as archers a flying Chariot is much more suited to their fighting style.

For how people talk about Michael, even in the books, he doesn't seem to be on the same level of attitude/aggression as Clarisse.

I think he just matches what he's given.

Clarisse is the one who started the fight with the chariot. That's why Annabeth specifically says she'll come to her senses. Because the Apollo cabin are just defending what's their's, maybe aggressively but they have even Chiron supporting that the chariot should be their's. Michael is being more on the defensive in a loud way. It's why no one goes to him and tells him to just give into Clarisse, heck Percy assumes Michael would still have the chariot during BoM. No one wants to just let Clarisse run over the Apollo cabin's achievements. Especially not Michael who's only been Head Counselor for a year.

Yet, Michael is the first to step away from it. But he doesn't let Clarisse just get by with still putting her pride first. He gives her choice words, likely out of lot of emotion, then just leaves.

And he dies. He dies defending Manhattan and his peers against Kronos. He let's Percy push him out of the way on Olympus, he doesn't fuss other than a sarcastic comment when Percy pretty much has Annabeth take over organizing his cabin. He let's Percy make the calls once he's on the scene, continuing to fight when he was just about to retreat. Than retreating when Percy actually orders a retreat. Only to come back when he sees Percy on his own after Annabeth is hurt.

He dies making sure Kronos doesn't get past them. Armed with nothing but one arrow and an idea.

And when Clarisse finally gets to the Battle, it's because her cabin and Silena left without her. She goes berserk on battle more so out of grief than duty.

I really do wish we got to see her reaction to learning about Michael's death/disappearance. Obviously she's had guilt over Silena's death. But she got to say goodbye. She got to be there for her and avenge her.

The last words she heard from Michael was likely him cussing her out.

There's one song I think about when I think about their relationship and it's Allies or Enemies by The Crane Wives

What happens now? Do we have another go? Do we bow out, and take our separate roads? I'll admit I've had my doubts But I want to be let in, not out But I want to be let in, not out Are we allies or enemies? This will be the death of me This will be the death of me All is fair in love, and war But I can't fight with you anymore This will be the death of me

Idk, just something about it hits. Really I don't think Michael necessarily hated Clarisse, I think he was disappointed and upset. And I feel like Clarisse would take his death hard, at least feel pretty guilty. Especially if she was close to him before hand. Heck even if she had just been close to Lee, she would feel lot of guilt for not being there to help his siblings.

And even more so. The last words they ever shared was out of anger.

And she'll never get to apologize.

#mine #pjo #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #pain rambles #michael yew #clarisse la rue #tlo #the last olympian #battle of manhattan #rick robbed us of so many good scenes based off Michael's death #i seriously don't get why he dropped Michael from being even mentioned so fast #especially leaving an unfinished arc with Clarisse and the chariot #they deserved better

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porter-pumpkim · 1 month ago

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more rambling about echo cause I love echo and that one echo au I made

ok so, once again, I never finished season 16/crystallized, I only got to the point of the infiltration mission for the whole overlords minions thing, and saw a few clips of later bits

And I'm not finishing the season for a random ramble

But,

In the echo au I have, and the Mr F situation, there's two ways this could go,

Either, Mr F is a cheap copy of echo, or, a much more fun option

As established in this au, echo doesn't have much faith in the ninja, thinks Zane needs to stop using himself as a shield just because he's the only competent one (in echos opinion) and considers himself as an independent protectir of ninjago.

Echo also is probably pretty conflicted over nya's death, he doesn't like nya or Jay, but at the same time, he understands what it feels like to lose the people you care most for, and nya is the entire reason echo even got a second chance, can't change anything now though, most he can hope is Jay will move on eventually,

Likely echo thinks the ninja shouldn't be ninjagos only line of defense, especially in their current condition, Zane can't handle his own emotions anymore, plus ice emperor keeps threatening to return with how much constant stress he's under, hence Zane turning off his emotional switch in hopes it will prevent any alter switches, echo doesn't want zane making his situation any worse, he wants his brother to recover dang it. Jay seems to have flat out gone insane, insisting he can hear nya in any nearby body of water, and even banishing himself to that horrid lighthouse echo was trapped in for so long, echo hasn't heard from him Jay after that sense he refuses to go back to the lighthouse. Lloyd seems to have just given up entirely and gotten a regular job, he's not even sure what Kai or Cole are doing,

So when the new ninja pop up, echo doesn't see them as a problem,the fare of all of ninjago shouldn't lie in the hands of the same one group that's too traumatized to keep going,

Hell echo might even have gathered some of the replacement ninja from season 6 as another line of defense, he saw Skylor in action during the rise of the garmadon empire, darreth is desperate to be a hero so getting him won't be hard, he literally lives with clancee, im sure with how horrible the ninjago prison system is now echo could've found a way to get Soto back, maybe even tried to convince the commissioner to join them, though he'd likely be too busy.

Ngl I keep imagining a scene between echo and the commissioner like

"I know you can't remember it, but you were a hero once, we fought side by side, we helped to defeat what may as well have been a god! And i can make you a hero again, if you'll acceot my offer."

Probably didn't work but he still tried

(Ngl im probably gonna skip the rekease asphera part if things cause im sorry but even if there eesperate they cant be THAT fucking stupid, abd vengestone shackles shouldve worjed to block enough of nya's power to keep her solid, so the new plot point is actually getting venfestone during the shortage, asphera is brojen out of prison by the overlords minions sense irs estsblished they know how to prison break, I'll do a proper rewrite later when I actually manage to rewatch the season)

Anyway, while the ninja are rebanding and getting their shut together, echo has no idea what they're doing, he doesn't keep in contact with them aside from Zane, and Zane stopped bothering to talk to echo after he decided to turn off his emotion switch, so of course, echo is trying to figure out the crystal king situation himself, maybe some of the replacement ninja are helping out.

Considering echo used to work for the sons of garmadon, and isn't exactly a hero, he's given an invite to join the crystal kings court, and after discussing with clancee (and maybe the other replacement ninja) they decide to try and infiltrate, echo will join the crystal council and return to being Mr E, while he's there he'll relay inside information to the replacement ninja, he may even be able to frame it as trying to recruit clancee or Soto sense the two of them also used to be villains.

So, rather than getting Mr F, we have the return of Mr E

Of course echo plays his role convincingly, the purple uniform, actually helping the crystal king (albeit with a few tiny bits of sabatoge here and there), and his grudge against the ninja definitely helps, plus, by now echo knows how to act and lie, he can pretend to want this corruption.

All is going well, until the ninja get involved, and echo can tell that Lloyd also had the infiltration idea, but dear God is the green ninja fucking horrible at disguises, isn't this guy supposed to be related to oni? How is he so bad at this!?

This is where the story can split, either, echo stays in character and tries to help capture Lloyd, or, he can blow his cover trying to help Lloyd escape, won't save him from what I have planned either way

Either echo tells Lloyd to meet up with clancee, or, Lloyd meets up with a replacement ninja and figures out whh echo was there

Getting lazy here sense just stopped watching at this point

No matter what echo picks eventually somebody realizes he's been an insider this entire time, and from what it looks like, the crystal king has those mind controll crystals, plus echo is a robot, so, it looks like echo is due for some reprogramming.

Againts his will echo fully joins the villains, no longer a person, once again one of their pawns.

It would also be kinda fun if clancee git mind controlled by those crystals later too, I already established cjancee knows how to fight after being stuck in the first real, he just prefers not to and often holds back, so imagine how terrifying echo and clancee could be as a duo, neither holding back, just absolutely wailing on whatever target they're sent after.

Idk if that plan would work sense I haven't finished the season, but ey it sounds cool and I get sone good angst with my favorite season 6 characters xD

#ninjago #Ninjago au #ninjago echo #ninjago echo zane #I love the idea of echo just repeatedly doing his own thing in the background with no damn idea what the ninja are doing #I can just imagine the Hella awkward staring across the table between Mr E and Lloyd #Lloyd having no idea echo is just infiltrating #Meanwhile echo knows damn well that's just Lloyd in cosplay as the mechanic #Also I absolutely NEED more echo and clancee action in this au

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fairydares · 2 years ago

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Reminiscing on the Hard Road (A Gruvia Fic)

Rating: M

Summary: While on his way to a mission, Gray reflects on the hardships, tears, battles, and triumphs which led to him and Juvia finding their happiness together. (Or: the story of how they finally, officially got together told through memories).

AO3 Link ; FFNet Link

Words: ~8,000

Warnings: Please read with caution as this contains adult themes & situations (though nothing explicit). Also swearing and allusions to mental illness, dissociation and depression symptoms especially. Man this feels like the end of a drug commercial. Enjoy!

AN: I realized how long it'd been since I updated Chasing Tails and was feeling really bad about it. I'm so sorry, guys! I've just been really busy! I don't have time to get Chapter 5 up tonight, but I do have the time to share this Gruvia piece I wrote a while ago as a karmic sort of apology.

With that in mind, this is a bit of a rough, long one-shot. It comes from a chapter in a larger, mostly Nalu-focused fic which I may or may not ever actually finish writing. Sooo it's not even really a one-shot so much as it's, like, a segment of a chapter from one. I also barely had time to clean it up ever so slightly.

However, I thought Gruvia fans would appreciate anyway. Maybe one day, I'll write the whole thing because I honestly think it could be a story, or maybe a series of drabbles? This is all you kids get for now, though, lol. no fucks given (just kidding this will keep me up nights.)

o(O)o

Ignoring Natsu's whining about still being motion sick from beside him, Gray buried his hands in his pockets and let his eyes engage in their favorite past-time: roaming the curves of the blue-haired woman walking in front of him.

Him and Juvia had officially been together for over half a year, but his eyes still snagged on the same places they always had. The sway of her blue hair, now long enough to partly obscure the pinch of her waist and flare of her hips with each swish. The pretty, cute flush that lived on her cheeks as she listened attentively to Erza, who was chattering about a famous desert shop in the area. The way shadow and light shifted over the curve of her rear. And—forever his most favorite—the exposed skin of her legs. Long, toned, moon white...and fucking perfect.

Gray felt his cheeks heat, but couldn't find it in himself to drag his eyes away. The solidness and length of their relationship did absolutely nothing to diminish the novelty of her beauty, like he might once have feared it would. Instead, it hypnotized him more surely than ever. Noticing all the men drooling over her figure as they walked past, Gray was aware of the sting of possessiveness and annoyance which rose in his chest, but was also easily able to ignore it.

He was as comfortable as any guy with a stunning girlfriend could be in his own jealousy, these days. More shockingly, so was Juvia, a fact that was plain from the way she shot only perfunctory glares at the women eyeing him and whispering to each other as they passed.

As he stared at her back, his lips quirked ever so slightly. It had taken time, tears, and work—more work than he could ever have anticipated—to get to this point in their relationship. But work had never been more worth it.

His mind wandered to reminiscence. To where it had all started, when they had started, after the 100-Year Quest had ended and he'd finally—with Lucy, Levy, and Erza's help—managed to ask Juvia to be his girlfriend.

"Not just 'yours'," Levy had insisted, explaining that phrasing would confuse her. "Your girlfriend."

He'd actually fought them on it. Not really because he had a problem with commitment anymore (okay, it was a little embarrassing, but not too much) but because the words "girlfriend" and "boyfriend" felt ridiculous, considering everything they'd been through. How deeply he cared about her. For crying out loud, they'd tried to kill themselves for each other. He'd kill for her, die for her, and—most importantly—he would live for her. Beyond making his ears feel like they were going to melt off, the word "girlfriend" felt trite.

But when Lucy and Levy demanded to know if that meant he was going to propose, he'd balked. Actually, having the m-word shoved right up against his nose kind of made his soul flee his body. As ready as he was for a romantic relationship, he wanted to go through the actual experience of having one. Like, with all the steps involved. In order. He was at the point in his life that he wanted it more than anything.

More importantly, he wanted to give Juvia that experience. He was determined to do right by her.

With the girls' reality check, and the point they'd made that ambiguity might make Juvia jump to the wrong conclusion or even hurt her, they'd convinced him. He'd been committed to making his long-awaited confession as special for Juvia as possible, complete with saying any embarrassing words she wanted to hear.

Gray still hadn't felt worthy of the love she gave him. He still struggled to believe he was a man who could protect her. But after everything he'd been through during the 100-Year-Quest, seeing how much she'd missed him the whole time, and his talk with Juvina-sama, he'd understood it was completely unfair to ask Juvia to wait for him to decide he was worthy enough to love her openly. He also wasn't above admitting that Juvina-sama's suggestion that she wouldn't wait forever had disquieted some irrational part of him enough to make him antsy, impatient to make absolutely sure they were exclusive.

He'd been completely flustered throughout his confession, but known it had gone as right as it could. Lucy, Levy, and Erza—who thought they'd been slick, hiding in a nearby bush to watch him confess—had agreed. (Lucy had annoyed him to no end by teasing him over how "adorable" he'd been.)

And yet...Juvia's response hadn't been quite what Gray hoped. Lucy hadn't noticed it, but he had. He didn't know exactly when it had happened, but at some point, he'd learned to read the Water Mage like an open book. For how sincere a person she was—a trait he was all too familiar with—Juvia could also be surprising, even mysterious. As transient as water, with hidden depths you'd never know a thing about unless you were willing to dive beneath the surface.

When Gray confessed, he'd braced himself for joyous screaming. He'd planned to freeze a literal flood of tears before it could wash them both away. He'd been prepared to get a concussion from how hard she'd glomp him in the street. But while she had said yes, demurely accepted the roses, and hugged him plenty tight...her response had been subdued. In hindsight, he could see the pattern her reaction fit: the way her gaze had dropped to the street despite her happy flush, the hesitant, nervous gleam in her eyes, the limited verbal response.

The only times she'd ever acted that way had been when he actually reciprocated some of her affection. When he'd promised to give her a straight answer, after he defeated END. When he'd given her a one-armed hug and said he was glad her "body" was safe, after he'd saved her from that wood bastard.

Something had been wrong. But when the girls who'd spied on him only gushed afterwards, not seeming to have noticed anything off, he'd shrugged off his concerns, assuming it was his own lack of romantic literacy. He'd been nervous, but also really excited to learn.

But as their relationship officially began...it quickly became obvious that there was a problem, and that a one-sided approach to fixing it just wasn't going to cut it.

Juvia had always been prone to mood swings severe enough to make Gray's head spin, but as soon as they started dating, her mood seemed to sink. He'd try to ask her about it only for her to put on an obviously fake, cheery front and insist she was fine.

At first, he was sure it must be his fault. He'd had no idea what he was doing wrong. At that point, the guilt he felt for not taking Juvia's feelings seriously for so long, for abandoning her in Amefurashi Village, and for nearly letting her die in an attempt to save him had been taking a serious toll on him. The guilt had sometimes left him ragged. Every time she seemed down, he beat himself up and tried to do better. Talking, dates, spending time together (even when it meant ditching missions he really wanted to go on with the team), accepting her gifts and acting happy about them (no matter how much they creeped him out).

But the more he'd tried to make up for everything, the worse it seemed to get. He watched her frustration rise as he tried to be more openly affectionate, her denials that she was frustrated getting louder. More and more, she gave, but when he gave back, she'd look ready to explode or burst into tears.

What had made everything come to a head was the sex. A surprise in itself. For all the ways their relationship had suffered, sex had never been one of them. It'd started back in the cabin they shared in Amefurashi Village. From the first night they'd moved in together, Juvia had not-so-surprisingly tried to edge her way into Gray's bed constantly. She'd use excuses of cold weather, make puppy eyes, and sew nauseatingly pink coupley bed sheets to try to lure him (when, he still had no idea).

Meanwhile, he struggled more and more to pretend he didn't find (most of) her antics adorable. Not to mention incredibly tempting. Things escalated to where he'd feel his excitement rising towards the end of their daily training sessions, to the point his body became conditioned to react when he saw the damn sun set.

He also felt increasing dread at the notion of having to turn Juvia down—and for having to sneak out in the middle of every night to "take care" of the problem she always left him with (cold showers didn't exactly work for an Ice Wizard).

Finally, one night, she'd pouted and whined that she was sore from training and begged for a massage. Gray didn't know if it was the fact she was asking him for something instead of offering; the unbelievably cute, sparkly-eyed, hopeful glances she kept sneaking at him; or the fact he could tell she actually was sore from the way her face would pinch as she attempted to stretch provocatively in front of him, but his resolve had shattered.

Before he could think and without a word, he'd lifted his covers and held her gaze, not bothering to hide the dark promise in his eyes.

Her reaction had been priceless. He'd never forget it.

His acceptance seemed to knock the breath straight out of her. Her eyes had gone round as saucers, staring into his eyes like she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Her cheeks had darkened. She'd stood stunned for so long that he'd started to get nervous, wondering if she'd only been being playful all this time, not really meaning to come on to him or maybe not expecting him to ever accept. But just as he'd been trying to field the disappointment sinking his heart and trying to think of how to promise he wouldn't do anything she didn't want, she'd hesitantly approached the bed, trembling.

After giving her the massage she'd asked for, he'd rewarded her bravery three times over.

After that, for the very first time, the dynamic of their relationship shifted in one, important way—the one which would force him to finally confront his own heart:

In terms of their physical relationship, he became the more dominant one. In this one aspect of their shared life, he chased. Gray flustered Juvia. He hadn't been able to get enough. What had once been a relentless, one-sided pursuit (one where she had, admittedly, been gaining on him without his notice) became a dance which had addicted him before he knew it.

The notion of reciprocating her feelings had once had him running for the hills. So it had been a huge shock to learn just how much he liked it.

She was so obviously happy and disbelieving that first time he slipped her clothes off in the moonlit dark, cursing over her beauty. Utterly awestruck when he'd seen to her pleasure (twice, he still liked to remember proudly) before even considering his own. Sex was the first time he heard her speak in the first-person, the first time she said his name without adding "-sama" (since that battle in the rain, anyway.)

It was when he lost himself in her soft skin, her passion, and her pleasure that some part of him was able to accept the truth she'd had the grace to surrender to from the very beginning.

The shift in their sex life was also when he'd started to twig something wasn't right between them. After Alvarez was when he'd started it back up. His plan had been to wait until he was able to reciprocate her feelings verbally, like he'd promised, but almost losing her had broken him in a way some part of him would never truly recover from. Between that and his final, full acceptance of his own feelings, there'd been no restraining himself. He'd come onto her with all the subtlety of a freight train the second they were alone.

Even then, something hadn't been quite right. She hadn't been herself, quiet enough that—even as...compromised as his critical thinking skills had been, at the time, and even in his heightened emotional state—he'd noticed. He'd pulled back and asked if she was okay, but when her response had simply been to drag him back in for a kiss that made his knees weak, he'd taken it as a yes and matched her passion enthusiastically.

She kept staying quiet in bed. It bothered the hell out of him, and he badgered her about it more than once, but would ultimately let it go when she insisted she was fine. In his defense, there had been a lot of reasons she could've become subdued. They had just fought a war. They were all exhausted from fixing the town and working to build peace in Fiore.

But after the 100-Year Quest and after his confession, she got even weirder. He noticed it all the time, in every aspect of their relationship, but it was especially noticeable in bed, when they were so close to each other, both completely vulnerable.

When they'd cohabitated, he'd almost always been the one to start something. He'd enjoyed that. He'd even (hell, especially) enjoyed the way she'd flirt, pretend to be oblivious to his advances, pout and blush and make him impress her, coax him to the brink of losing his mind before finally caving to both of their desires. Those times where he went from prey to predator had balanced their entire relationship, satisfying both of them.

Gray wasn't some slimeball who needed sex, but he did need some balance in their dynamic. The private, physical side of their relationship was just where it'd happened to play out. It could've played out anywhere in their relationship, if they were off sex for a while for whatever reason.

But as soon as they became official, it became clear she'd fight tooth and nail to make sure that never happened.

She came onto him. Every. Single. Time. He'd been a little surprised, but happy enough. At first. But as he pushed her to talk to him harder and she denied louder, he'd started to guess that something was genuinely, really wrong.

She didn't speak in the first-person when they were intimate, any more. She didn't drop the "-sama." Even worse, he started to suspect she was seducing him even when she wasn't really in the mood. Almost like she felt like she had to.

It had been one such time when he finally flipped his shit. Even now, walking behind her and appreciating her curves, the memory made his mood falter a little.

He regretted how he'd handled things. It shamed him to remember how he'd all but shoved her off him and refused to do anything else with her until she was ready to tell him whatever the hell was going on inside that crazy, watery head of hers. It was an ultimatum. A cruelly-put one, at that. He hadn't realized just how hurt and angry he was until the words flew out of his mouth.

Juvia had opened up, alright.

In fact, she'd exploded.

They'd screamed at each other, horrible things Gray could hardly stand to repeat even in his own head. She'd demanded that he quit wasting both their time and leave her again, like they both knew he would. He'd asked how stupid she could be to think he'd do that, when he was obviously dedicated enough to put up with her psycho stalker gifts. She'd retorted that her "psycho stalker gifts" didn't seem to have any affect on his libido. He'd yelled that she was the one jumping his bones, ever since he'd asked her out. She'd said that was because she actually cared about his happiness, implying that was something he'd never understand.

She'd ended the black, ugly fight with four hoarse words that ripped his heart out of his chest: "This is over, Gray-sama!"

His apartment door had slammed behind her.

He'd been too shocked and devastated to do anything but watch her go, not even managing to stagger to the door and chase after her until she was long-gone. Black curse power had swirled across his skin as he pelted to the guild, growling in frustration when he didn't find her there. Then he'd run all the way to the female dorms at Fairy Hills only to be deterred by Erza, who met him at the gate. She hadn't known anything about his and Juvia's fight, but she'd been drawn by his yelling.

His older sister figure had knocked him out "for his own good."

The next afternoon, Gray had woken up in his own bed. Not bothering to see if he was dressed (it would turn out he wasn't) he'd booked straight to the guild only to be devastated by the news that Juvia had taken a long-term S-class quest just that morning, news which was delivered by a sympathetic Mira.

Sure that it was over, that he'd ruined everything, he'd drunk himself sick—then kept drinking, swinging fists at anyone and everyone who tried to console him until, finally, in the wee hours of the next morning, Gajeel managed to knock him out of it.

The hostility, Gray had expected. Gajeel was Juvia's best friend; of course he was angry to learn that Gray had done something to upset her so much, she'd left for a Quest that could take months or even years to finish without so much as a word to Gajeel or any of their other comrades.

What did surprise Gray was the understanding Gajeel eventually showed.

Gray got his ass knocked flat by the Iron Dragon Slayer. From his back on the ground, he started to spit out what happened. With each word, the larger man had visibly calmed. After enough had come out, he'd awkwardly helped Gray to his feet (his own, gruff brand of apology.) He'd helped Gray sober up, then he'd given him a pep talk.

He'd refused to explain his own guesses as to what was going on with Juvia, insisting "who knows what goes on in that water witch's head." But he'd also insisted that whatever was going on, it for damn sure wasn't what Gray thought, which was that he'd hurt her too badly for her to love him anymore.

"She's obsessed with you," the man had said, scowling in disgust. "She's always been obsessed with you. She's way too stubborn to let it go that easy. It's annoying."

By six AM, Gajeel Redfox—of all people—had talked Gray into chasing after the love of his life. He'd even used his Iron Magic to create a lockpick which got them into the archive room, where they'd found Mira's records...and Juvia's location.

He'd barely had the time to register the irony of her quest's location before he was gone, shooting Gajeel a gruff "thanks" over his shoulder and running home to pack.

It'd been raining when he finally walked into Amefurashi Village.

He hadn't consciously known where to start looking when he arrived, but his feet—following some combination of muscle memory and the fate he'd fought for so long—had carried him to the place where the word "home" had changed for him: the cabin he and Juvia had shared. Where they'd grown together. Taken care of each other.

Where he'd left her. Hurt her. Even if most of the reason to do so was because he wanted to protect her, he couldn't stop hating himself for that.

She was standing outside the place, drenched and shivering, when he got there. As if sensing his arrival as surely as he'd known where to find her, Juvia had turned to look at Gray with eyes that were glassy above flushed cheeks. She'd wavered on her feet.

As soon as she'd whispered his name, she'd toppled. Gray's bag had landed in a puddle with a splashy thunk. He'd lunged to catch her like his life depended on it.

Shouting her name had earned him no response, but pressing the back of his hand to her forehead had been enough to convince him that she had a seriously high fever.

Strangely, as worried as he'd been about her, he hadn't even thought to bring her back to Wendy or seek a nearer healer. In hindsight, he was sure that deep down, he'd realized it would do no good; she wasn't physically ill, but heartsick, just as he was. He'd felt lower than the mud gathering around his boots.

He'd been surprised to discover that he had to break into their old home, and rapidly deduced that Juvia hadn't been staying at their old cabin even though she'd been standing outside of it, both from that fact and the fact that none of her stuff was there.

As soon as he lay her in the bed which had once been his before becoming theirs, she'd begun shivering. For the first time in his life, Gray cursed that he was an Ice Wizard instead of a Fire Wizard.

He'd run outside, grabbed his bag, then come back in—only to curse again when he unclasped the bag only to discover that all its contents were soaked. Thinking quickly, he'd stripped his wet clothes, then hers. He'd climbed into bed with her.

"'M sorry, Gray-sama..." she'd slurred her sleep. "Juvia's so sorry...Juvia had to...I just had to..."

He'd shushed her, rubbing her arms to try to warm her up. "It's okay, Juvia. I know, my love. It's okay..."

He'd kept holding her and whispering soft comfort to her until she'd finally stopped shivering, at which point his frantic worry had abated enough that he could fully admit to himself how good it felt to have her in his arms, her skin against his. How warm she was. How perfectly she fit against him. How much he missed her. She was right there, as close as another person could ever be to him. Yet with how things had been between them lately and how lost she was to fever, he'd never felt further away.

Apparently, he'd fallen asleep at some point, because when he awoke, it was to the rising sun blazing at him from the center of the cabin window. Ignoring his body's reaction to waking up in the arms of the very naked, beautiful woman he happened to be in love with, Gray had instantly dropped his hand to Juvia's forehead, sighing in relief when it became clear her fever had reduced. She wasn't better, but she was getting there.

Quickly figuring out what needed done, he'd dropped a tender kiss to her warm forehead, murmuring a threat against her sweaty hairline: "You'd better not even think of running away again, crazy woman. We are going to talk when I get back."

Gray had dressed, glanced back, and left. He'd met up with he client—a rich and unfortunately good-looking asshole about Gray's age who was way too disappointed Juvia, herself, wasn't the one who'd shown up. Through gritted teeth, Gray informed the bastard it would be a couple days before he and his partner (he was sure to emphasize those words several times) would be able to begin investigating the dark guild threatening the area, as she'd fallen ill.

It annoyed him to no end that the creep seemed genuinely concerned about this, trying to insert himself, demand to see her, and attempting to coax Gray into revealing her location (Gray couldn't help the pleasure and hope which rose in his chest, when he learned she hadn't told this guy wherever it was she was staying; obviously, she'd had no interest in sharing that information.)

The client had thrown a rich boy tantrum when Gray refused to tell him anything, but ultimately let him go when Gray promised Juvia would be there in a couple days (not bothering to mention that he would absolutely be there, too.)

He'd gone to pick up medicine and food. He'd grabbed all the ingredients he could remember for something hearty, mild, and delicious she used to make him when they lived together, a chicken stew that tasted like something he could remember from childhood. Those ingredients, medicine, ginger tea...anything he could think of that might help her feel better, he purchased, barely noting price.

Juvia had been waiting on the porch wrapped only in a blanket when he returned, flushed with both fever and anger.

They'd both been pissed at each other. While Gray locked horns with Juvia's amorous creep of a client, she had apparently been discovered by the landlord who owned their old cabin and only barely managed to talk him out of his anger, ultimately having to pay double their old monthly rent to keep him from calling the authorities—all while wrapped only in a blanket.

A brief yelling match had ensued. It ended when Juvia began coughing rather violently, Gray dropping his groceries in the mud to run to her. Even as she insisted she was fine, he'd ushered her into the cabin, forcing her to sit before he went back out to grab the food he'd bought.

Her face had gone funny when he began grouchily unloading chicken, rice, broth, veggies, and herbs. When he (somewhat defensively) asked what the hell she was staring at, she'd haltingly asked if he'd bought all of that for her. Exasperated, he'd told her of course he had, she'd had him worried sick.

The groceries had been abandoned when she burst into tears.

It had taken several minutes of heart-wrenching sobs on Juvia's part and coaxing on Gray's for the conversation to actually begin.

During their ugly fight in his apartment, she'd exploded.

Here, in the lonely home they'd once shared, she imploded.

While the groceries thawed and dripped on the kitchen counter, Juvia sobbed the whole, messy, painful truth into his chest. She told him everything. She told him how, deep down, she'd always known she wasn't worthy of having her love reciprocated by him. It had been true from the moment they'd met, when she'd been part of Phantom Lord, but remained true no matter how long she'd been at Fairy Tail. That was how she'd put it: "I always knew I wasn't worthy of Gray-sama's love." Not only because of her past, but because of how annoying she was. How gloomy. How creepy and obnoxious.

Gray hadn't even had time to express his horror at the fact she thought those things before she'd been plowing on, her tears only getting thicker and her words only making his heart sink lower.

She said knowing she didn't deserve his love had turned to knowing she didn't deserve to love him at all, when she'd killed Keyes to free Gray's father from his undead life. But even though "Gray-sama had been wonderful enough to forgive Juvia," she'd continued to hate herself, deep down.

She told him that sharing a life in the cabin they were currently in had, for her, been the sweetest kind of torture. That she'd never been so happy—and never felt more undeserving. For the first time, she told him that she'd only had one lover before Gray, some piece of shit named "Bora" who'd never cared about her or her pleasure. Gray had been nothing like him, attentive, caring, and as invested in her pleasure as he was in his own. At first, feeling so cared for had been as overwhelming as it was amazing, but by the time Gray started to pull away from her for his mission, the overwhelmed feelings had slowly begun to fade, letting her forget everything but the happiness she felt with him.

Juvia told him that the day he abandoned her to infiltrate Avatar, everything which she'd started to believe could feel right began to feel wrong, and everything which had felt wrong began to feel right. She'd never felt she deserved to be loved by Gray the way she loved him. Being left by him had, in a horrible way, made her feel like the world was how it was supposed to be.

But it had also ripped her apart.

It had destroyed any confidence she'd begun to gain in herself.

She told him that she resented being abandoned. Resented not being told about his mission to infiltrate a Dark Guild, not just because of their relationship, but because she had once been in a Dark Guild, and could potentially have helped his and Erza's Mission. She'd not only felt betrayed on a personal level, but disrespected as a Mage with no small amount of skill and experience.

It was a side to the issue which he had, shameflly, never considered.

He was mortified when she'd finally let herself chastise him for this—especially when he'd tried to defend himself by bringing up details of his mission only to be instantly struck down and ripped apart by someone who was, in fact, very obviously more knowledgeable about the inner workings of Dark Guilds than either he or Erza ever had been. Hell, Juvia could probably have run the mission almost as well as Jellal had.

For the first time, he saw just how beneficial it would have been to have her on board, despite Erza urging him not to get her involved. He should've gone against her orders, asked forgiveness instead of permission. Over the course of that one conversation, it was clear that having her on board would have shortened the length of their mission by probably several months.

But worse than the benefits they'd missed out on, in infiltrating Avatar, worse than the fact that she resented him, was her admission that she hated herself for that resentment.

She'd apologized. So many times. Too many times to count. Each apology was another crack in Gray's heart. He'd tried to ask her to stop, but they'd just kept slipping out anyway. It was like she couldn't help it.

She'd told him that over time, as she got to know the other women in Fairy Tail—Lucy, Cana, and Levy—she'd realized just how unworthy she was of the care Gray held for even just his friends. She just hadn't been forced to confront her own lacking sense of self-worth...until he openly reciprocated her feelings.

She said that the second he confessed, part of her felt wrong. Like she'd donned someone else's skin—someone who was worth being loved by Gray. Her guilt, her knowledge that she wasn't worthy of him, her bitterness, her self-hatred...all of it had come rushing to the surface.

She told him that, as unworthy as she'd felt, she'd been too selfish to reject him. Too angry at the thought of him being with someone else. Her own selfishness made her feel even worse than before. She'd been determined to be worthy of him, and so she had sought to pay every ounce of love he gave her three times over. At least.

It hadn't made her feel any better. No matter how hard she tried to be sure to pay him back, every time Gray took her on a date or made love to her, it made her skin crawl, because she didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve his love, his affection, or even his attention. He deserved better, and she was nowhere close to deserving him. She never would be.

If there had been even one last, single sliver of a doubt as to how he felt about this woman, it died then and there. Nothing—not his own guilt, being screamed at, or being broken up with—nothing could hurt worse than being made aware of what a hard time she was having. Learning just how badly she'd been dissociating during all their most precious moments. How much pain she was in. How little she thought of herself. How deep her scars ran.

He'd have given anything to take her pain away. He'd have given anything to change it. Right then, he couldn't think of a single thing he wouldn't have done to make her see herself as he saw her: the energetic, caring, fierce Mage he'd come to know. The woman who always eclipsed everything else for just a second, the first time he saw her every day.

He'd wanted to tell her all that, and more. He wanted to apologize. He'd wanted to tell her how badly he missed her after he'd left her here, that this place had been home for him, too. He'd wanted to tell her how much she meant to him, that no day without her smile even felt real, but his voice had been stuck behind a lump of misery and all he'd been able to do, for a very long time, was lay in their bed and hold her while she cried the rest of it out. He wasn't too ashamed to admit he lost a couple tears in her hair, too.

Over the twilight of time it had taken for her sobs to turn hoarse, then to whimpers, then sniffles, guilt, emotional exhaustion, an anguish washed over Gray in their turn.

Until finally, he hardened all of those feelings into resolve.

"I'm really thankful that you're here. For always being beside me..."

Those were the words Gray had said to her before Alvarez, and he'd meant them. For years, Juvia had done nothing but be there for him. Even when he didn't want her there, she stayed right next to him, quietly piecing together his heart and his trust. It killed him that the woman who'd confronted him with her love, made him face down his own weakness, always thought of him, and helped him so much more than he could ever truly thank her for had been hiding so much of her own pain. He wished she would have told him any of this all the times he'd pushed and asked.

But he couldn't blame her for that. Maybe she hadn't opened up to him before then, but her mentions of her days in Phantom and of that shithead ex of hers had driven home, with stark clarity, a realization he wished he'd made a lot sooner: Juvia didn't know how to open up like Gray had tried to demand, because she hadn't grown up somewhere like Fairy Tail.

Unlike Gray and Natsu and the others, she hadn't been taught to bare her pain, hadn't always known there would be someone to listen to her, cry with her, be on her side. While Gray had been fought, teased, and accepted for exactly who he was (more often his whole self than not) Juvia had been abandoned by every single person in her life except Gajeel and those who'd wanted to use her for their own ends. Gray abandoning her had only confirmed what she'd been taught was inevitable.

But the Ice Mage wouldn't linger on that. He wouldn't give any more time to despair.

It was his turn now, he realized. His turn to stay beside her even when it was hard, and do the work. Now, he just had to figure out how. But while he'd been trying to do that, had been gathering his words, Juvia had recovered enough to speak once more.

She'd apologized again. She'd told him that she knew this was too much, that all of this was too much...that she was too much. For the times they'd shared, she thanked him quietly, eyes bright with yet more tears and refusing to meet his as she continued that she'd had to let Gray go because she wanted him to be happy, and she'd finally, finally realized she could never do that for him, not really. Then she'd tried to push him away, and as Gray had tightened his grip, he'd realized he didn't need to figure out what to do, what to say, or how to love her.

She'd been showing him all along.

After a deep breath, the words had come low, and easier than he'd thought. He told her she was right, all of this was a lot...but also that he was so, so happy she'd finally told him what was really going on. He'd been as gentle as possible when he told her he could see how difficult and scary it had been for her to open up about all this and that he was proud of how brave she'd been for doing so, but she'd started crying again anyway, so he'd had to carry on with a shakier, hoarser voice.

He'd apologized. For everything. For not taking her feelings seriously for so long, for not seeing her when she needed to be seen, for leaving her behind and hurting her so badly she'd gotten sick. He hadn't been dismissing her abilities as a Mage so much as he'd been trying to protect her, but that was no excuse. "High-handed and cruel" was a generous way to describe his behavior, and he finally saw that. He'd told her that if he could take it back, he would. But he couldn't. He could only promise to never, ever leave her like that again, and he was more than ready to make that promise. He had been for a long time, since well into the 1oo Years Quest. If she'd only give him another chance, he'd show her.

At this point, Juvia had obviously started to twig that this conversation wasn't going to go how she planned, with Gray accepting she was too burdensome and unworthy for him and leaving her alone like everyone else had left her, because she'd started kicking up a fuss, forcing him to hold her there again.

"Let Juvia go, Gray-sama!" she'd demanded shakily, sounding like she was barely clinging to her determination. But Gray had refused. He refused to let her go like this, not until she'd heard him out.

As brief as the ensuing argument had been, it was also one of the most frustrating conversations Gray had ever taken part in (and he'd fought Natsu on basically every cock-and-bull-ass plan he'd ever come up with.)

He'd tried desperately to insist that while Juvia could be creepy and he did find rain somewhat gloomy, she was not worthless or annoying or obnoxious. He'd tried to tell her that she did make him happy. He'd tried to tell her how he felt about her.

Juvia had not responded well.

A wall had slammed up in her eyes, the same blank one he'd met on that fateful, rainy day so long ago. As she'd kept denying, and he'd kept pushing, their voices had gotten louder. Eventually, Gray had realized it was raining outside the window next to their bed again, and that was the one thing that had forced him to take a step back from his own frustration. Lucky, because if he hadn't, he might have flown off the handle and ruined everything all over again.

Looking down at her, he'd forced himself to cool off and realized he was being unfair; he was asking her to take an entire journey in one leap, to unlearn a lifetime's-worth of lessons about her own worthlessness over the course of a single conversation. No one could do that. It was an unreasonable thing to ask.

And so, when he'd finally gathered his wits and perspective enough, he'd said, "You don't have to agree with me. You don't have to agree with my feelings for you. But you have to believe that they're real...and you have to at least consider my side."

Juvia's eyes had gone wide. As they regained their sparkle, he'd refused to break eye contact. Slowly, the rain had stopped, leaving them in the silent hut.

After what felt like years, she'd shakily whispered, "O-okay."

And Gray had known that they were finally, finally getting somewhere.

Quietly and slowly, with their hands intertwined between their chests and their foreheads pressed together, they'd pieced together a fragile plan. They would stay together and be as they had been, but from now on, they were both going to make a concerted effort to be honest and rebuild trust. Gray started by admitting that missing out on Quests with his team had really started to bum him out, and while this seemed to sadden Juvia at first, she admitted after some thought that in being with Gray, she hadn't been nurturing her own friendships with her friends like Gajeel and Meredy. Lucy had also asked for help training her in Water Magic, and Juvia had declined so far even though she was interested in having someone to teach.

Gray had encouraged all of this...and he'd encouraged her to visit Porlyusica, too, when they got home. The old lady was hardly a Mental Healer, but she'd hopefully be able to help them find someone who was, someone objective and removed from the situation who Juvia could talk to openly. One thing which had sunk in fully for Gray over the course of Juvia's heartrending speech was that it was going to take a lot of time, work, and love to get Juvia to a better place. There was no way the two of them could do it alone.

They'd talked and planned until their voices were hoarse...and then they'd not talked for even longer. Juvia once again dropped the "-sama." She let him come to her. She didn't just surrender herself to him the way she had when they had each other before in their cabin, she'd given him even more—in his arms, she'd bared a small and precious part of herself Gray had never even realized she hid from him.

Over the course of the month they spent in that cabin, he'd cherished everything she gave him more than most men could've in twice the amount of time. How they'd managed to deal with that Dark Guild months and months ahead of schedule, he would never understand, because his head had never been less in the game. Neither of them had been able keep their hands off each other for more than an hour when they were alone together.

Neither had been particularly disappointed when that crotchety old landlord refused to give them back any part of their months' rent. Instead, they'd stayed till June was up breaking the place in thoroughly.

"It's payback for him being a jackass to you!" Gray had once playfully defended against her neck, pinning her against the kitchen counter and grinning as she gigglingly scolded him.

He only prayed no one ever took a UV Lacrima to the inside of that place. They'd go blind. He'd taken her on the couch, over it, against the walls, on the counters and tables, and in more positions than he'd previously known existed in that bed. When they returned home, a bunch of people had pointed out that they both looked like they'd lost weight. Gray didn't doubt it, after all the—

"...seriously, none of you know what it's like, every time we travel...OI, STRIPPER, YOU MAYBE WANNA QUIT EYE-FUCKING YOUR GIRLFRIEND WHEN WE'RE IN PUBLIC, YOU GODDAMN PERVERT?!"

The absolute last voice Gray wanted to hear when he was thinking about such great, intimate things yanked him out of his reflections in the most unpleasant of ways. An expression crossed between a scowl and a grimace consumed his features.

"Gray-sama!?" Juvia spluttered, craning her neck to peer at them over her shoulder with wide eyes. She looked half-scolding, half...affected as her cheeks went rose red.

Gray felt his own face grow hot as he turned to glare furiously at the pink-haired, disgusted-and-disgusting-looking bane of his existence.

"Would you keep your voice down, Dragon Boy?! I was not 'eye-fucking' Juvia!" His cheeks burned hotter as an elderly woman passing by shot him a deeply disapproving look.

"The hell you weren't!" Natsu snapped, drawing even more attention. "I could see all your gross, perverted thoughts right there in those droopy eyes of yours!"

"ARGH! So what?!" Gray just wanted this fight to be over, and figured that sort of admitting to what he'd been doing was the quickest way to make that happen. "Can't a guy even look at his girlfriend without pink-haired, flame-brained losers getting involved?!"

"THE HELL YOU JUST CALL ME?!"

"OH, SO YOU'RE DEAF AS WELL AS BRAINLESS, NOW?!"

"THAT'S IT, I'VE HAD IT! YOU'RE DEAD, YOU ICY BAS—"

"That's enough."

Uncharacteristically subdued and uninvolved though Erza's command was, it was enough to have both Natsu and Gray cringing and sweating in fear almost instantly.

"A-aye!" they squeaked, then sighed in relief as she shot them one last glare and clanked away.

"Ah, it always goes this way." Happy folded his little blue sausage arms over his chest and tsked. "If only Gray had kept his perverted eyes on himself, we wouldn't even be talking about this."

"And just how the heck is one supposed to 'keep their eyes on themselves', huh?" Gray growled up at the floating Exceed.

"By not being you, apparently!" he cackled back, Natsu soon joining him in his obnoxious guffawing.

"Why, you—! Get back here, you little shit!" Gray made a random grab at the little creep only to curse as he missed his tail by about a centimeter.

Meanwhile, Juvia clasped her still-red cheeks with her hands and donned an all-too-familiar, starry-eyed expression. "Juvia does not mind at all if Gray-sama...covets Juvia in public! How Juvia adores Gray-sama's passion!"

Gray flinched as if he'd been whipped in the back. In a second flat, he was blushing again. "O-oi, Juvia—!" he started, scrambling to find a way to get her to calm down before she came onto him in public.

(Again.)

"However," she continued before he figured out how to distract her, turning to look at him with a mischievous twinkle in her eye. "If Gray-sama is going to covet Juvia on a public street, Juvia thinks he should at least wear clothes."

"Wha—?! CRAP!" Gray shouted as soon as he realized he'd stripped down to his boxers. "When did that happen!?"

Juvia wrinkled her nose cutely and giggled while he scrambled for his clothes. When he was finally yanking his jacket on, he shot her a playful glare only for his lips to quirk when she winked and sauntered after Erza.

That little...she'll get it later, he thought with a huff before shoving his hands in his pockets and strolling after her. He was well aware that he was full-on grinning, now, and didn't care in the slightest.

Little interactions like that...those were the fruits of all the hard work they—especially Juvia—had done when they got back from that S-Class mission. Gray had been prepared for it to be grueling and difficult, to fight. "Relationships take work" was a piece of advice he'd heard plenty, since he started asking for advice about how to love Juvia.

But what he'd never expected to find was that, while it was hard sometimes, it was work he was all too willing and capable of doing, because it was for her. For them. And what no one had told him was that, while loving someone meant their pain became yours, it also meant that their triumphs became yours, too.

Some days had been worse than others. Even though she'd been talking to a friend of Porlyusica's and made an impressive effort to spend more times with her friends, there were moments where Gray had felt like Juvia was back at square one. But he'd been there beside her, encouraging her every step of the way while she healed, learned that he wouldn't leave her again, learned that she was worth all of it. And slowly but surely, she'd healed.

That was what no one had told him: that every time she huffed at him to do his own laundry, teased him, sassed him into taking her on a real date, and even turned him down for sex, that he would feel such a huge rush of pride and triumph.

It was true that the road had been hard, but Gray had walked it with Juvia, and that had made every step worth it.

o(O)o

AN: Ah, sorry I don't have the time to edit this now and make it more cohesive! Also that I can't publish my next chapter of Chasing Tails just yet! I definitely, definitely will come back to edit this piece one day and make it better after I've done that. In the meantime, Happy Belated Gruvia Day!

P.S.: Fun Fact! I named this partly after one of my all-time favorite fics from a completely different fandom. The Hard Road by wthtonibelle, a Kacchako fic (from the My Hero Academia fandom) which is written in a similar way and has similar themes, only it's longer and better lol. check it out if you're so inclined!

#fairy tail #gruvia #gruvia fan fiction #gruvia fanfiction #fairy tail fanfiction #fairy tail fan fiction #gray fullbuster #juvia lockser

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forgeofthenine · 1 year ago

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Hey again, I'm the anon who sent you the boys react to Tav's death ask.

Been playing the game for a bit and it got me wondering about the mind flayer ending for Tav. Most companions would leave you (except for Minthara and Gale I believe) after the ceremorphosis , but would our beloved tieflings do the same? There's just something so bitter/angsty about them loosing affection or romantic interest just because Tav was (kind of) forced into going through with the ceremorphosis to save everyone else.

On a realistic standing, out of the three, Dammon might be the one to lose interest the most, he's seen the hells, he has helped Tav, but this isn't the Tav he fell for. Then would be Zevlor, he's fought countless battles, along side Tav as well, but could he really love a mind flayer? Probably not. And lastly there's Rolan, a wizard. I could see him falling into same space as Gale, but he would need a lot of time to think about it. He wouldn't be open to it immediately, probably break up for a bit.

I love my boys, but you need to be really power hungry like Minthara or freaky devoted like Gale to love a mind flayer.

But what do you think? My opinion might be slightly biased as a Rolan lover, so I want more fresh of an opinion.

You also can call me ranger (🏹) anon, I'll be plaguing your ask box from time to time lol

Nice to see you again ranger anon! Sorry that this has been sitting in my ask box for so long...

As much as I'd love to say all three of our men would adore us all forever and stay even after an unexpected ceremorphosis, I think that would be very unrealistic. I feel like all the bachelors would at least need a break from the relationship, and despite how much it pains me to say, I don't think Dammon would stick around. As much as he loves his partner, they aren't the person he fell for and this isn't something he signed up for either.

I actually feel like the next one likely to leave would probably be Rolan, he'd be pretty 50/50. After a break I could see him coming to the conclusion that he can make things work because this man is stubborn and he loves them damnit. Cal and Lia would be much more wary of the relationship though.

And Zevlor, darling Zevlor, I just get the vibes that he wouldn't be able to tear himself away. He's invested so much into this relationship and been through so much. I'm not sure if he's just tired and it's sunk cost fallacy or if he's genuinely that devoted but I think he'd probably stick around.

#bri rambles #bri answers #🏹 anon #bg3 dammon #bg3 zevlor #bg3 rolan

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shallyne · 1 year ago

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The Diary of Feyre Archeron Ch 7

Chapter seven is here! It's getting a little angsty, buckle in. Full fic on AO3.

Words: 1.8k

TW: kidnapping, in a way

December 8th

I've been working for Rhys for two weeks now and I thought I was lucky to not cross ways with him at all during that time but yesterday he went home just as my shift ended, so we both went out at the same time. Yesterday of all days it was raining cats and dogs and because it is Rhys, ever the gentleman, he insisted he'd drive me home. I must admit that I haven't declined as much as I should have, I agreed pretty easily but you try walking home, or even to the next bus stop, in Velaris rain. It doesn't rain often but when it does, it's chaos.

The drive was pretty quiet for the first half, and tense. At least from my side. I can't decline that Rhys is even more attractive now than he was when we were fifteen. I was a girl and I had a crush on a boy. Now I am a woman and he, well, he is a man. A really big, muscular, manly man. The most beautiful man I have ever seen if I'm being honest but all of this doesn't excuse that he lied to me back then. That I have to live this life because of him. He saved us with this, yes, but I'm sure somehow this all could have been avoided if he told me. We could have found a way, together, but he tried to do it all on his own.

Well, when we stopped at a red light he broke the silence to ask me how I was doing. It didn't take a genius to know he was genuinely interested but I couldn't really tell him that I am still hurt about something that happened eight years ago because if I would there is a possibility he would ask why and I had to tell him it's not what he did (I mean, yes, that too but it's not the reason why I was that hurt) but that the real reason is that I am was in love with him and my heart broke at the possibility he would ever lie to me that way about something that would ruin my whole family. I trusted him.

Shit, I'm babbling. I probably don't even make sense? Do I make sense? Probably not.

Anyways, Tamlin picked me up later that day and I spent the night with him. He was in a weird mood again and asked me tons of questions about my sisters for some reason. I don't like answering questions about them, not because we don't have a story we tell people but because I could slip up. Sometimes I still call them by their real names in the comfort of our own four walls, it's a dangerous game, I had to shut him up by distracting him.

This morning we ate brunch with Lucien, the mood lighter again, which was mostly thanks to Lucien and his questionable jokes. It was funny. I didn't laugh, Tamlin doesn't want me to laugh at other people's jokes.

After brunch we all went our own ways, Tamlin went home, Lucien went to visit his mom and I walked downtown to work.

Rhys was in again today, I don't know why but I also don't care, he probably just had to deal with some things because the Lounge just opened.

December 12th

Today has been stressful. It's christmas season and Mara, Daisy and I tried shopping for a new couch. It was hell. After a guy poured coffee all over Mara’s shirt and a fight almost broke out between them, we gave up and went home. It started snowing like crazy about half way home and Daisy almost walked into a door because we could barely see between the flocks of snow. It was cold and by the minute we got more and more miserable. We decided to wait for the weather to clear up in a Café where we sipped hot chocolate when suddenly Rhys turned up and I tried to hide behind a menu because I didn't want him to see me all disheveled from the day. I think I succeeded because when I looked up he was gone. Mara looked at me weirdly. No, I wouldn't say weird. Knowingly, she knew what's up and I hate that she knows, but luckily, she didn't say anything. But at home she accused me of wearing her shirt, which wasn't even true, we just have similar shirts. We fought but that's okay, when dinner time rolled around we shared the last pizza roll.

Right after dinner Tamlin called and insisted on coming over to our apartment to spend time there, Mara looked at me like she'd kill him with her bare hands if he came over and even Elain shook her hand. Truth be told, I don't feel comfortable with him coming over. Not because I am ashamed of our apartment, we really tried to make it homely. I like it. But, I don't know, it's just a feeling I can't shake. I don't really want anyone here but us, it's our sanctuary, in a way. I never took anyone to our apartment. Never.

I had to make up some excuse about having explosive diarrhea and that was enough for Tamlin to leave it. Maybe I should tell him the truth but, honestly, I am scared of his reaction.

Am I the problem??

December 14th

Tamlin and I agreed that i spent my birthday with him. As much as I would like to be with my sisters, I had to agree because he's getting antsy about me not inviting him to my apartment. At least we found a solution for now.

Also, Rhys saw me in the Café two days ago. I was kind of embarrassed when he told me but, as surprising as it was, we slipped into banter pretty easily, just like 8 years ago. I've missed it so much. Just the banter today felt like a step forward between us. The more we talk, the more I realize I want to forgive him, SO badly. Maybe we should talk it out, maybe I should listen to his side of the story. I never bothered, have I? Maybe I should have listened before blowing up on him. And I did, I really blew up on him and he just let me. I really want to hear his story.

Am I crazy?

I don't know.

I just miss my best friend, a lot. He's here now, against all odds. We find each other in a city thousands of miles away from home, isn't that a sign?

Letter from Feyre Archeron to Rhysand

December 15th

Dear Rhys,

I really don't know how to start this letter, I feel like no words in the world could express how I feel, but I'm going to try.

My plan was to talk to you today but I saw you standing at the bar, talking to Rita, and all the words left my mind. I need to write this down or I'm going to forget half of this, you still have that effect on me.

I want a new start for us, if you are willing to.

I've talked to you really harshly years ago, I never gave you a chance to explain yourself. More importantly, I know you wanted to protect me, you always want to protect the people close to you. I should have looked past my fury, I should have given you a chance, and after my mistreatment of you, you still helped my sisters and I, which I will be forever grateful for. If you can't forgive me, I understand but if you are willing to try, you'd make me the happiest woman in the world.

Since you came back into my life, I realized how much I missed you. There has always been a shadow where you should have been. You were my friend, my best friend, and I was yours. I really wish to become your friend again, to be a person you can trust, a person you feel comfortable around. I can't describe how sorry I am, but I'd like to show you. If you let me.

We can start new, we can leave the past behind us. You and me.

Please text me or talk to me or write a letter back or whatever you want to do, if you want this, too.

Sincerely,

Yours

Unsent Letter from Rhysand to Feyre Archeron

Dear Feyre

Dear Clare

I miss you

I missed you

There is nothing to forgive

There is no need to apologize

Come home

I would die for you

I'm yours

I love you,

December 20th

I promised Mara and Daisy we would celebrate my birthday when I'm back from Tamlin’s. With our combined income we can afford a little night out, I'm pretty excited. Especially for Daisy's cake. I'm always open to new flavors so Daisy is trying something different every year for me. Mara is more of a chocolate cake girl, so that's her birthday cake flavor almost every year. For my birthday two years okay Daisy made me a lemon raspberry cake and it was so good, I'm still dreaming about it.

But I'll only get my birthday cake in a few days. At Tamlin’s it is probably going to be his favorite flavor. I don't mind, I don't want him to go extra lengths for me, it's not important.

I'm packing right now, because I'm going to spend the night with him.

I'm excited to see Lucien again, I missed him. He had his own stuff going on with his family these days, hanging out will hopefully be a little reprieve for him.

I should go to sleep now, it's pretty late.

I shouldn't be this nervous about a stupid birthday, right? He's my boyfriend.

Note from Feyre Archerin, slipped to Alis for Rhysand on December 22nd

Hlp

Tamlin

Neva

Warehuse red

Chat between Rhysand and Azriel on December 22nd

Rhysand: You need to look for Feyre's whereabouts ASAP

Rhysand: Her sister just crashed into my office saying Feyre is missing since her birthday

Rhysand: She thinks something happened to Feyre

Azriel: Elain?

Rhysand: Nesta, but she has Elain in tow

Azriel: On it, I'll call when I find something

Chat between Rhysand and Morrigan on December 22nd

Morrigan: There is a woman who wants to talk to you about Clare

Morrigan: she says it's important

Morrigan: her name is Alis

Rhysand: coming

Chat between Rhysand, Cassian, Azriel and Morrigan on December 22nd

Rhysand: Tamlin has Feyre. She left a note with a maid of his for me, they are on their way to Neva

Cassian: that can't be, Hybern still has all his men in Dunmere. They think the sister's are dead

Morrigan: not anymore

Morrigan: wait, NEVA?

Rhysand: Neva. He brings her to Amarantha

Rhysand: Cassian, Azriel and I will drive to Neva. Mor you stay here with Nesta and Elain

Chat between Rhysand and Amren

Rhysand: I need to call in my favor

Amren: I've been waiting for you to reach out, boy. What do you need?

Feysand Taglist:

@captain-of-the-gwynriel-ship @starfall-spirit @rhysiedarling @corcracrow @sydney-fae25 @tothestarsandwhateverend @aayo-whatt @dreamlandreader

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1heartfanfics · 2 years ago

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Soft Bucky

Here's another little ficlet, Steve/Bucky this time cause I've also been back on an avengers kick. Also just prevent that civil war didn't happen.

------------------------------------------------------------------

It was weird living here, in Tony Starks skyscraper compound. As soon as Bucky had come back to Steve the Avenger's had accepted him with open arms - well, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration-. They were definitely all a little scared of him, but they'd always been nice.

Tony had offered him a room on the same floor as Steve, which he'd accepted. It's not like he had anywhere else to go. Although it hadn't been long before he and Steve were sleeping in the same bed again, so his room went unused most of the time. He knew they'd all noticed, but no one had said anything.

The good thing about living in the compound though, was that there was always a lot going on, which meant that Bucky could easily blend into the background and not be noticed. He could always slip away if things got to be too much or if he needed to be alone, and Steve understood that.

It was also good for trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with Steve without anyone noticing that he'd been watching him out of the corner of his eye for this entire debriefing. Most of them were too busy arguing about something stupid and there were at least three separate conversations going on.

"Hey," Bucky said under his breath, giving Steve a nudge with his elbow, "You okay?"

"Fine," Steve shrugged. But he didn't look fine.

Bucky must've looked skeptical, because Steve gave him a slight smile -that looked more like a grimace- and nudged Bucky back. Oh yeah, Bucky thought, that makes it so much more believable. He fought the urge to roll his eyes. Steve could be so stupid sometimes.

"What do you think Rogers?" Tony's voice cut through Bucky's internal monologue, and he realized that the attention had been turned to them.

"Steve?" Nat asked when he didn't respond. Bucky was frozen under their eyes, even though they were mostly looking at Steve.

"I-" Steve started to speak but cut off abruptly, "I'm sorry," he gasped out, then jumped up out of his chair and bolted to the corner of the room where he promptly bent over the trash can and puked.

That was enough to snap Bucky out of his thoughts. The crowd suddenly forgotten, he jumped up as well, moving to stand next to Steve, placing one hand on his back and the other on his hip, rubbing gently, just like he used to do all those years ago when Steve would get sick.

"Aw Stevie, I knew something was wrong," Bucky sighed. Steve was no longer actively throwing up, but he was still hunched over the trashcan coughing and gagging.

"Easy darling, you're all done," Bucky said, wrapping his metal arm around Steve's waist to help support him, he could feel him shaking. He needed to get Steve sitting down.

"Buck.." Steve groaned, letting Bucky take some of his weight.

"I know Stevie," he shushed him, brushing his hair out of his eyes with his other hand.

That was when he remembered that he had an audience. Shit. Well, if they hadn't figured out the nature of his and Steve's relationship they sure had now. He turned his head to find them all silently gawking at the scene happening in front of them.

Bucky winced, hating the attention. But it wasn't about him right now, he just needed to get Steve taken care of. He swallowed hard.

"Can someone push a chair over here?" he asked.

No one moved for a moment, then Clint stood up, pushing one of the empty chairs over toward them. Without saying anything he grabbed Steve under one arm and helped Bucky lower him down into the chair.

"Thank you," Bucky said, avoiding meeting Clint's eyes.

Clint nodded, "I'll go get him some water," he added before heading out of the room.

"Hey, that came on pretty quick huh?" Bucky said softly, crouching down in front of Steve's chair, one hand on Steve's leg.

"M'sorry," Steve mumbled, slumping down further in the chair so he could lean his head against the back.

"Don't, it's okay, I've got you," he looked up, glancing at the others who were all still quietly observing, "We've got you," he amended.

"I don't feel good," Steve said quietly.

"Yeah I know you don't. We'll get you up to bed in a minute okay? Just rest for a second first," Bucky said, standing up and moving to Steve's side to drape an arm around his shoulders. Steve leaned his head against Bucky's side, pressing against him.

Bucky stared down at the floor, waiting for Clint to come back and break this horrible awkward silence. They were all staring.

"I didn't know cap could even get sick," Tony said after a few more moments of quiet.

"Neither did we," Bucky answered, looking up at the group for the first time. They all just looked worried, sympathetic. They weren't judging him, or Steve, they were just worried.

Maybe he liked living here after all.

#avengers #marvel #steve and bucky #sick steve #caretaker bucky #soft bucky #tony stark #natasha romanov #captain america #winter soldier #clint barton

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cakemagemaeve · 7 months ago

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On Friday, we said goodbye to our last dog, Pippin. He was an old man, and it was clear that the Rimadyl was having less and less of an effect on his arthritis, and so on Monday I made his final appointment, and we proceeded to spend the next few days spoiling him as hard as we could and doing everything we could to make sure he knew how much we love him. We showered him with treats, tummy-rubs, and back massages with my old curry-comb. Also, this year my family had hamburgers for Christmas dinner (why? Because we had hot dogs for Thanksgiving dinner.) and mom made him his own patty, which he deeply enjoyed even if it had to be slowly fed to him piece-by-piece. Mom also took him for short walks every day (Pippin loved us all, but he was unquestionably her dog), and he'd get so excited every time, though it clearly took a lot out of him as well.

We all went to the vet with him on Friday, and when they gave him the anesthesia, they put him on the exam table, which had a soft, plush blanket on it for extra comfort. After she administered the meds the vet said we could put him on the couch while we waited for them to kick in, but when dad went to pick him up, he picked the blanket up with him, which immediately proved to be a big mistake when Pippin slipped right out of it and onto the floor, nose-first. If you're thinking that it must have been utterly horrifying beyond reason, then you're right. I'm still kind of in shock, and I truly don't know if I'll ever be over it. It just keeps replaying over and over in my mind and it hurts more every time. It was just a freak accident, but oh, it was the last thing Pippin deserved and I hate hate hate that his last few minutes were that much more painful for him (and us). Needless to say, it messed dad up pretty badly too, and he feels incredibly guilty about it, and he probably always will. I know I would.

We finally got Pippin settled on the office couch, laying between me and mom (his favorite place to be). We petted him and apologized to him and told him over and over what a good dog he was (and he was. He was such a good dog) while the medication slowly took effect. He fought it, though. He kept trying to stay awake, like he wasn't ready to go just yet, and so of course that left us all feeling even more guilty and conflicted than before. Eventually though, he went under, and the vet came and gave him his final shot while all three of us had our hands on him, and he quietly slipped away.

Dad had already dug the grave (right next to his brother Jig's), so when we got home we brought him inside so that the cats could see him one last time. Pippin was beloved by all of the cats, especially the kittens. He had an extra-special bond with both Sir Cheeto and his older half-sister Squeaktoy (they have the same dad, a clever stray named Joe Dirt, whom we've been trying to capture and neuter for years). Squeak sniffed at his body and then ran out of the room (she's been through this before with Jig and Sokka), but poor Cheeto just kept pawing at Pippin's face and nudging him with his nose like he was trying to wake him up, and it was utterly devastating to watch.

We then carried Pippin back outside, and dad gently lowered him into the hole. He looked so peaceful, like he was only sleeping. We each threw a handful of dirt over him (it's a family tradition), and then Mom and I stayed and watched as dad finished burying him. It was a deeply traumatic and painful experience all around, but at least he's not hurting anymore, and he never will again. Cold comfort perhaps, but it's all we have.

You know what's weird, though? I haven't really cried once since he died. I teared up a little at the vet's office and while we were burying him (and right now as I type this), but I haven't wept for him the way I have for every other animal I've lost. I cried for his brother earlier this year, and I cried for dad's cat Miss Chi, but I still haven't cried for Pippin and I don't know why. My mom says it's most likely because of my medications, and she's probably right, but I still feel like a horrible person. Pippin was such a wonderful little dog and I miss him terribly. The house feels so wrong without him. The past few days have been utterly surreal, and I feel so empty inside, like I'm barely even present most of the time. I've just been running on auto-pilot. And yet at the same time, I'm going through a manic phase that has me barely able to keep still or sleep or focus on anything. It's like part of me is climbing the walls like a feral cat, while the other part of me is stuck in a grey void of numbness listening to the sounds of static. It kinda sucks. Wonder if I need my meds adjusted again. Anyway, I may not be able to process emotions properly right now, but I know that I'll always love and miss that sweet dog.

Goodbye, Pippin Moon Moon Hellhound. You were an amazing dog and a deeply beloved member of my family. I was lucky I got to have you in my life for so long. It was a privilege to get to be there to welcome you and your brother Jig the White Devil Hellhound into the world and I'm glad I could be there with you (both of you) when you left it, too. Sweet dreams, Pippin. I love you. Say hi to Jig, Mac and Sokka.

#cw: pet death #dogs #grief #mental health #trauma #shock #picspam

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scribeofskyrim · 5 months ago

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Fredas, 19th of Sun's Dusk, 4E 201

We're back at the Vilemyr Inn, and I wish I was as sure about things now as I was when I went to bed last night.

Especially after those Cultists.

They were wearing strange masks and claiming that I'm not actually the Dragonborn?

I don't know what to do!

So much happened today. It even started with a fight!

As soon as we set foot outside the Inn, a vampire and two death hounds jumped us! We and the guards fought them off, but not before I got infected.

Erandur's still paranoid about that, but I have a bunch of potions on me, and they seemed to do the trick. I promised to get a blessing from the first shrine we come across.

Anyway, once all the ruckus calmed down from that, we went to cross the bridge to get to the mountain path. There, we ran into a Nord and a Bosmer, Klimmek and Gwilin. They were talking about Klimmek making a food delivery to the Greybeards, and the man was complaining about how his knees weren't what they used to be.

So, I volunteered to make it for him. I mean, we were headed there anyway!

Klimmek was happy that I was willing to help, and gave me a knapsack full of food. He said it was salted meat and other things that can keep for a good while. He doesn't charge for it or anything. It's just something he's been doing for years.

There's good people here in Ivarstead.

With that, we were on our way up the seven thousand steps.

Honestly, I don't think it was that many, but Mara's tits, it felt like it!

In terms of animals on the way up, we ran into some frost trolls, bears, and wolves. A LOT of wolves. There's plenty of goats around for them to eat, and I picked up some goat legs for us to have later, too.

Along the way, here and there, are little stone altars? They're not tall like pillars; they're sort of like headstones, actually, but they all have tablets with inscriptions on them. There's ten of them, and they tell the story of the dragons and how people learned to Shout. They also told about Jurgen Windcaller, and how the Greybeards summoned Tiber Septim - Talos - to High Hrothgar.

It feels strange to know that I walked the same path Tiber Septim did. There've been other Dragonborn between him and me, but according to Lydia, they weren't called to High Hrothgar like I was.

What makes me different?

I asked the others this at the time, and they - My friends said that they didn't know.

Divines, I know they're my friends, but it feels so strange to put it down on paper.

Anyway, I thought about it a lot as I walked up, and even more as we walked back down, after what I'd learned.

We were all pretty quiet on the way up. They knew I was nervous, and didn't push me to keep moving or anything when I'd stop to read the tablets, or walk to the edge of the path to look out over the land. Even Erandur hardly said a word.

The view is amazing, I'll give it that.

On the way up we ran into two pilgrims. The first one, a hunter, we ran into before we reached the first stone tablet. He was on his way down and said he'd heard the Greybeards when they Shouted for me. He shuddered at the memory of it, and said he wasn't sure what it meant.

Same here, and I've talked to them!

The second person we met was a woman, clearly a warrior, sitting in front of the fourth tablet. She said she made the climb every few years just to meditate on the words. Unlike the hunter, she was excited to have heard the voice of the Greybeards!

As we went up, the weather got colder and colder, and the wind picked up. At times the show was blowing so badly I couldn't see the world past the mountain at all! I kept having to use Wolfskin and Bask just to keep from the freezing, and Erandur and I both kept torches up. Valdimar admitted that he was glad for the extra protection the Elven armor gave him from the wind. He said it was "A bit chilly".

The second to last tablet is right before High Hrothgar, set into the base of a statue of Talos. I took a moment to look up at him after I read the tablet, and wondered if he was just as confused as I was. Was he scared, too? He'd only been a boy, and there I was, a grown woman, afraid of what I'd see in the building just up the path from where I stood.

Hugh Hrothgar looks more like a fortress than a monastery, with wide steps that split around a tall tower. At the base of the tower is a chest for placing food, and a bunch of offerings left by pilgrims. Klimmek said he's never seen one of the Greybeards, but he's glad for it. He heard they could kill with a whisper!

The final tablet is by the steps, so I read it, then walked up to the chest and put the supplies in.

I was so tempted to turn around and go back down, but I made myself go left, up the curved steps, and I stopped outside the big metal double doors that lead into the building.

I didn't want to go in, and when I told the others, all the fears I'd confessed to Wilhelm and then some came tumbling out. Erandur and Valdimar tried to calm me down gently, but Lydia surprised all of us by interrupting me with a spine-cracking hug and said I had nothing to worry about. No matter what happened, we were going to go back home once we were done or sell off our loot, whichever came first, then head for Sarthaal. That was the plan, right?

I admit, that did more for my nerves than any words or mystery booze could. She was right. No matter what, we had a plan.

At the very least, we could warm up inside before we headed back down.

She went to one door, and Valdimar put his hand on the other. Erandur stood behind me, a bit to my left, and Septim was on my right, nosing under my fingers.

Lydia nodded to Valdimar, and they pushed the big doors open.

The main hall of High Hrothgar is lit by open skylights in the ceiling, and deathly quiet. There's multiple braziers around for heat, and lots of candles, too. I think the carvings high on the walls are meant to depict Akatosh.

When we walked inn, the four Greybeards were all gathered there, and I think some of them were… Praying? Meditating? I'm not entirely sure, honestly. One of them came forward, and welcomed me as a Dragonborn.

I asked him what that meant, exactly, and he said that first they had to make sure I really was Dragonborn. They had to "taste of my Voice."

I hope it's not just me, but that sounded kind of gross at the time, and even more now that I think about it.

Whatever. They're a bunch of old hermits who never talk to anyone, so… I think we can forgive them for being a little strange.

He assured me they wouldn't be harmed, so I demonstrated my Force Shout on them, and they were pleased. He smiled and said I really was a Dragonborn, and introduced himself as Arngeir, who speaks for the Greybeards. He wanted to know why I'd come.

I mean, they'd called me, but I told him I wanted to know what it meant to be a Dragonborn, and he said that was part of the Greybeard's purpose. To guide those of Dragon's Blood.

I noticed that, unlike everyone else, he wasn't calling me "The" Dragonborn. I asked him if there were others, and he said that many have received the "gift" of Dragon's Blood from Akatosh over time. Whether or not I was the only one of this age was not for us to know. I was the only one they knew of, and I alone had answered their call.

I told him I was ready to learn, and he said that while I had the talent to Shout, I needed discipline to master them. Arngeir then went on to explain that each Shout is made up of three words, and knowing more words makes the Shout more powerful.

I knew it!

He gestured to one of the others, and introduced Master Einarth. He said that Einarth would teach me "Ro", the second word of "Unrelenting Force".

And then… It was amazing. Einarth whispered - WHISPERED - the word, and I could feel the stone rumble under my feet when he did. Then it appeared on the floor in glowing orange runes.

There was no chanting or change to my vision. Not even that strange pull. They just glowed there.

I walked up to read them, and I could hear Valdimar start to follow me to catch me if I fell. I saw Arngeir gesture for him to stop, and he did.

The words didn't do anything to me. There was a wave of golden light, and the sensation of rushing wind, but it was warm, and pleasant, like the warm breeze on a summer's day.

Arngeir said I learned words like a master, but that the only way to unlock the power of them was through dedicated practice. At least, that's how it went for Tongues. Apparently, when I take a dragon's soul, I take in some of their life force and their knowledge, and that's how I "unlock" Shouts.

I'm so glad he explained it to me! I was going to ask why I absorbed souls, and it literally is just a "Dragonborn Thing" like the others say!

He said that Einarth would share his knowledge of "Ro" (Balance) with me, then Einarth spread his arms and golden light, exactly the same as what came from the rune on the floor, flowed from his chest and towards me. As before, the feeling was warm and soft; a gentle breeze.

Arngeir nodded in an approving way, and Einarth stepped back. Arngeir wanted me to demonstrate my more powerful Shout, and said that they would summon targets for me.

The other three Greybeards, one after another, whispered a word and a phantom form of themselves appeared in the middle of the room. I shouted each phantom to mist, and they all nodded approvingly at one another.

Arngeir said I did well, then had me follow Master Borri to the courtyard out back.

He said they wanted to see me learn a completely new Shout. Like Einarth did inside, Borri whispered a rune onto the ground, which shook.

I did the same thing with "Wuld" (Wind) as I did before, learning the word and getting the knowledge from Borri. It's the start of a Shout called "Whirlwind Sprint".

Arngeir then gestured to the other monk, and said that Master Wulfgar would demonstrate Whirlwind Sprint for us. There's a large metal gate at the far end of the courtyard, and Borri whispered a shout, and it opened.

Wulfgar Shouted, and he burst forward like an arrow, and easily passed through the gate before Borri could close it on him. We were all amazed, and just looked at each other. We'd never seen anyone move so fast!

Arngeir challenged me to get through the gate before Borri closed it, like Wulfgar, and had me stand next to him, between two small stone pillars. I saw there was a clear line of stonework on the ground. This was how they trained!

I took a deep breath, and waited for the gate to open. As soon as it did, I Shouted, and by the Nine! I can't believe what happened! I don't think my feet touched the ground, I was just… There, on the other side of the gate, and trying not to fall off the side of the mountain!

I started to laugh, and I think I might've sounded a little mad, because it really was such a rush! I ran back to my friends, cheering. They were just as excited as I was, and Valdimar picked me off the ground in a big hug like he does, congratulating me.

I don't know why, but normally trying out new Shouts feels… Dangerous. It's scary, because I don't know what they're going to do. There's some I've never tried. I've started, but then I feel the power growing, and it feels almost too big, so I stop. Having them shown to me first makes it actually fun!

Arngeir and the others walked up to me, looking at each other and nodding approvingly.

Arngeir said that seeing me master a new Shout was "astonishing" and that he'd heard of how quickly a Dragonborn can do it, but to see it firsthand, well…

I shrugged and admitted that I don't know how I do it. It just sort of happens?

He said that I was given this gift by the gods for a reason, and I was hopeful to hear what came next.

"It is up to you to figure out how best to use it."

That's… Not what I wanted to hear.

Arngeir went on to say that I had one more trial to complete. I had to retrieve the horn of Jurgen Windcaller from his tomb in…

I was too shocked to let him finish. "Ustengrav?"

Arngeir was pleased to know that I had heard of it, and it took everything I had to keep a straight face as I said that yes, I knew of it. I knew where it was, actually!

He said that was excellent news, and since that was the case, they hoped to see me back soon.

The others were just looking at each other, and I am so very glad that Lydia's helm covers her face. Still, I heard her mutter that we're gonna need some shovels.

I covered that up (I think) by asking Arngeir if there were only four of them there, and he said that no, their leader, Paarthunax, lived alone at the very top of the Throat of the World. When my Voice is strong enough to clear the way, I'll be able to go see him.

Arngeir gestured to the other side of the courtyard, towards a large stone arch. There was a blizzard raging just past it, and I had the distinct feeling it wasn't a natural wind that blocked the way.

Yeah, I can't get past that. Not yet, anyway.

As we went back inside out of the cold, I asked him more questions, and learned that the others don't speak because the rumors are true. A whisper could kill me. I asked about the dragons return, and if it had anything to do with me, and he said that it must. He said I needed to focus on training my Voice, and that soon enough, "your path will be made clear".

I asked him about the Way of the Voice, and he said that the Voice was a gift of Kynareth. He said that many Tongues abuse their power, and that its true purpose was for the worship and glory of the gods. True adherents of the Way of the Voice seek balance, and meditate on the sky, and try to being their inner desires in harmony with their actions.

I asked why they would help me if I didn't share their beliefs, and he explained that as Dragonborn, the rules don't apply to me. He said my Voice is a gift from Akatosh himself, and that their duty was to guide me in the proper use of it.

We were in the main room of High Hrothgar now, and the other Greybeards were all meditating, either at the images of Akatosh or staring up at the sky through the skylights.

Erandur whispered that the sun was getting low, so I bid farewell to the Greybeards, and we set out on our way.

I didn't know what to think as I left High Hrothgar. I got out my torch and stopped to read the last tablet again, the one right by the stairs. The last line is "Speak only in True Need."

I kept going down the mountain and stayed quiet, lost in my own thoughts, until I heard Lydia gasp and go, "Look at that!"

I turned and looked towards the sun, which was very close to the horizon, and saw the most beautiful aurora I've ever seen! Ribbons of light, in pink that faded to blue, radiated out from the sun, dancing across the sky and covering everything in a soft, rosy glow.

I don't think I've ever seen anything that beautiful before in my life.

We all stood there on the edge of the cliff, commenting in whispers how beautiful it was, and how none of us have ever seen anything like it. I would've watched until the sun set, but a sudden gust of icy wind reminded me that we were on the highest mountain in Tamriel, and it was getting dark, fast.

We hurried down, and soon the snow that had started to fall turned to a light rain as we reached the bridge to Ivarstead.

I stopped on the bridge to think, staring out past the waterfall. I wondered what Arngeir meant by my path being made clear, when I heard a familiar roar behind us, and the flapping of wings! We turned to see a small dragon attacking Ivarstead!

We ran to help, but before I could get to it I was stopped by two people, a man and a woman, wearing strange robes with bone-like plates that look like armor, and creepy carved bone masks. They asked if I was the Dragonborn, and I said that's what the Greybeards call me! I just wanted to get past them to fight the dragon that was wreaking havoc on the guards at the other end of town.

Valdimar and Lydia had already joined the battle, but Erandur lingered, instead using magic to fire at the dragon while keeping an eye on me. Septim was between me and the cultists, growling.

The other one said that the lie had spread, and that they would tear out my heart! They called me a deceiver, and said I was not the true Dragonborn! They said their Lord Miraak was the True Dragonborn, and that he will come and "all will bear witness" whatever that means.

They attacked, summoning a Fire Atronach and using other fire spells. Septim, Erandur and I fought them, while all around us, the battle raged as the dragon circled and blew waves of Frost over everyone.

We killed the cultists, and then went after the dragon. We managed to kill it, and I was so exhausted from the hike and the fighting and just... Everything that the force of the soul hitting me was too much.

I fell to my knees and Valdimar caught me before I hit the ground.

Klimmek came up to see if I was all right. He was astonished, and wanted to know what happened. I was still out of it, so Lydia spoke with him and explained everything, and he handed her some gold for delivering the food for him.

Valdimar helped me up. The guards were eyeing us warily, and giving the dead cultists a wide berth. I asked Lydia to take all they had and meet us inside, then let Valdimar help me up the steps into the Inn.

Erandur ordered us some dinner, then Lydia came in and set one of their masks on the table. Lynly says it's creepy, and she's right, it is.

Lydia said the cultists were both Dunmer, and she'd found a note on the man. It was an order telling them to go from Raven Rock to Windhelm, then find and kill me (they knew my name) before I got to Solstheim. If they did, it would please Miraak.

I'd never even heard of Solstheim until now! The others told me that it's an island to the northeast of Skyrim. It's not part of the Empire, and is half snow-covered mountains, half ashland, and the people reflect it, too. I asked why I would want to go there, and they couldn't think of a reason.

We looked at the letter again.

I said that clearly, I'm not supposed to go there.

They picked up on my tone.

Erandur said, with a smirk, that it sounds like they don't want me there. They think I'll Do Something.

Valdimar said, almost nonchalantly, that they sounded afraid of me.

Lydia snorted and said they weren't afraid of me, they were afraid of what I'd do.

I asked her what that was, fully knowing her answer, and she said, "What you do best, my thane. Something Stupid."

We laughed, and I stashed the note and mask in my pack.

Food made me feel a lot better, and we discussed our next move. We'd see about digging out Ustengrav, but if that proved to be too difficult, we could always head on to Sarthaal. I do want to go to Solstheim, but only after I take care of everything we've been putting off here. Valdimar asked about the piece of Aetherium we'd found, and I said that finding the Aetherium Forge, if it still existed, would be for after Solstheim. Whatever waited for us there would be helped by having the completed Gauldur Amulet, probably.

We chatted and drank after dinner while I wrote. It's well past midnight, now, and the others have gone to bed. Tomorrow we head back to the Manor.

Wilhelm asked me how my trip went, and I said I wasn't sure. I learned a lot, but with those Cultists saying they served the True Dragonborn... It was strange. I told him to send for us if he saw more of them sniffing around here again.

He promised he would, and pointed out that even if that Miraak fellow was a Dragonborn like me, he and anyone else with Dragon Blood had three whole months to reach High Hrothgar before I showed up!

I hadn't thought of it that way. He's right, of course. Anyone else like me could have gone up that mountain. They had plenty of time to get there.

I admit, that made me feel a lot better.

Well, I should sleep. It's really late, and I've finally gotten all of today down. Let's hope tomorrow's a quiet one.

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#skyrim #writing #journal #fiction #the elder scrolls #tesblr #fanfic #bronwens journal #skyrim fanfiction #the elder scrolls skyrim #high hrothgar #the greybeards #ivarstead

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