#but only to me

[eternalera]

i have a headcannon that branzy knows literally everything about everyone. like they just talk to him about literally anything, even their deepest darkest secrets because like... its branzy. why would you tell him where you hid that one body or how youre gonna take over the world??? he's just a likable guy and everyone rants to him about things.

so yeah he has a LOT of blackmail

[kalashnikovlobotomy]

drawing a single heterosexual rusame because it'll be funny

[bluebutlikenotalways]

I guess this is my life now

Stills under the cut

[clownboybebop]

sooooo if wizards made rap they would be OutKast. If they made metal they would sound like System of a Down. Oingo Boingo is for mages and lesser necromancers, Frank Zappa was no question a warlock and over the course of their storied career the Chicks have repeatedly mentioned the influence fortelling the downfall of MacBeth had on their music process. However, many significant acts commonly citing or attributed to the influence of witchcraft, such as Fleetwood Mac, are in fact commonly mislabeled as, occult due to its evocative and subversive nature when in practice it is simply music for those who love intensely yet fail at polyamory. Too, artists from Elvis to Hozier have been falsely deemed enchanted, while the artists both themselves credited their singular styles to a love of black music and performers. It is common for casual racists to attribute the achievements of black and indigenous populations to magic or the supernatural rather than crediting them with their own ingenuity. This is because magic, even though it shouldnt be possible for them imho, can be and sometimes even is practiced by people who fucking blow, such as nazis. And from false narrative of the Soulful White to the Occult roots of Third Reich propaganda, from Tolkien-inspired Brit-rock wave during the 70s to the simple and ancient the act of soothing a child to sleep, magic and music have always been inextricably linked for better or worse. Over the course of this dissertation I will-

[copepods]

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

[corviiids]

was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.

[just-french-me-up]

'ao3 needs a like and dislike button'

what you need, my algorithm-rotten minded friend, is a grip

[slormp]

Loved one got top surgery yesterday so I made this for him but I think y’all would appreciate it too

[p4nishers]

clark shouting "people were going to DIE" in the face of the "think of the consequences of your actions" argument is so fucking important to me bc it really IS that simple you can't look at a genocide and just twiddler your thumbs bc you're a afraid of the consequences ESPECIALLY when you can do something about it and THATS WHAT CLARK DID. WITHOUT HESITATION. WITHOUT CONSIDERING HOW IT COULD HURT HIM. bc hes a good person and in his brain its really just people were going to die so i had to step in bc what else would it be. superman i love you i love you i love you

[oaky-dokey]

love the library. there's no risk. you can take out a book and go "wow this sucks" and just give it back. and when you do that you're still making the library's Number Go Up so you'll be able to roll the dice on even more books. all for the low low price of free/you already paid for it with your tax money so you might as well use it

[swedenis-h]

Wife lovers till they die

[jesteeve]

I decided to hop on the trend of wacky Susie and Kris images

[drumlincountry]

Why do they even make apps for ADHD. You want me to use my 24/7 handheld immediate distraction device? To manage my 'gets distracted too easily' disorder? Ooooh we developed the perfect tool for managing your anemia. Its hosted in Dracula's castle. 👍

[bookwyrminspiration]

I can behave normally around books

[the-one-who-lambs]

They should invent a being a writer that doesn't come with being isolated and diminishing returns on what you are given back compared to how much you give