#but then i slowly realized there weren’t enough pages left for everything to be ok

[likealizardyousay]

no one talk to me i finished Gone With the Wind

[g0ldengubler]

locked desires ~ g.w.

Requests: open/CLOSED

Request: YES/no

A/N: i hope you enjoy! this was a fun concept to work on after not writing any for awhile. the writing might not be as good as I would’ve liked it, but i still hope you enjoy :)

Category: smut(NSFW18+ MDNI)

CW: daddy kink, praise kink, fingering, unprotected sex

WC: 1543

masterlist

"Give it back, Y/N!" said George, trying to grab his journal out of your hands but you wouldn't budge. You went into his dorm after class like usual to find that all was left was a note telling you that he would be back soon. You had found his opened journal to see that he was writing about you, more so what he wanted to do to you and you to him. He walked in on you holding it in your hands while laying in his bed, grinning devilishly.

You continued to play your little game, fighting George off on top of you while trying to keep the page you were on with your finger in the book. You giggled at how your giant of a boyfriend was failing, a little mean but you were being playful. "Don't make me tickle you!" He threatened.

You knew he got you there, you hated tickling. But you felt a bit bratty, which was something he had in his journal. You put your forehead against his, slowly grinding against him and whispered, "Make me."

"Oh, you're going to regret that." George grabs the book out of your hand and throws it across the room, not caring where it landed. He cups your face and meets his lips with yours, his tongue forcing his way in. You feel a hand sneak under your shirt and play with your tits, softly rubbing your nipple in between his index finger and thumb while sucking on your neck.

You let out a whimper at the contact, which made you feel a chuckle vibrate against your skin, a grin forming. George slowly moved his hand off-making you whine at the loss of contact-and found its way under your skirt and in your panties, rubbing small circles on your clit. You let out a soft moan, wanting more. He understood and slowly slid two fingers inside you, making you moan louder as he thrusted them in and out of your heat. Thankfully, you put the muffliato charm on his dorm awhile ago.

"You're practically soaked, little one." He said.

"Fuck don't stop daddy, it feels so good!" You moaned out.

George's eyes winded, the realization that you really read his journal hitting him. But he didn't show any signs of nervousness or embarrassment, he wanted this. He was waiting for this.

"Yeah? You like when daddy fingers your tight cunt like this?"

You nodded profusely, never breaking your eyes from his deep brown ones. "Use your words."

"Yes daddy, I l-love it-fuck!" You felt yourself getting closer and closer to the edge, the knot in your stomach tightening as your clenched around his fingers. You thought you were going to be in for a treat, as one of the things he said he wanted to do was overstimulate you.

But he stopped suddenly, pulling his fingers out of you. The look on his face went from lust to rosy cheeks slowly, making you concerned as his eyes looked down to his coated fingers.

"Hey, what's wrong bubs?" You asked.

"I-I dunno," he said, not making eye contact, "the embarrassment is hitting me, I guess."

You sat yourself up, using your left elbow for support as your right hand cupped the side of his face. You gently moved his head to look up to you and you smiled when you saw his eyes meet yours. "We don't have to do this if you feel uncomfortable, Georgie," You began, "I am truly sorry I looked into your journal. I invaded your personal space and that wasn't ok. You don't have to be embarrassed, though! The amount that I read is the reason why I'm so wet right now. I'd be thinking about it all night even if we didn't do anything."

George gave you a little smile just enough to show that he didn't feel as embarrassed as he did. "This is why I love you, Y/N," he said, "I do want this. I've been daydreaming about this all night every night for the past couple of months. I just didn't want to push you into something you weren't comfortable with."

"You're literally the sweetest guy I've met," you smiled, "But that's why we have conversations like this. That's important."

He got off on top of you and lay next to you, rubbing lightly on your arm with his clean hand. You took his other hand and put his fingers in your mouth, swirling your tongue around slowly as you tasted yourself. When you took them out with a pop sound, you thought he almost lost it.

"So, how much did you read?" He asked curiously.

A cheeky grin appeared on your face. "What other ideas do you have in that brain of yours, Weasley?"

With a cheeky grin of his own, George got off, stood at the foot of the bed and started stripping. As each piece of clothing came off, your eyes couldn't dart away even if you wanted to. His body was immaculate, and your favorite part was his v-line. He stripped off his pants and boxers, his cock springing free and hitting his stomach lightly.

"Like the view?" He asked as he stroked his cock.

You bit your lip as your legs closed and rubbed together, trying to get some sort of friction.

"Don't close your legs, darling," His voice was low and dark, "I want you to take your panties off and rub your clit for me. I want you to beg for my cock, and until you do, you're going to have to just watch."

You didn't hesitate. You did as you were told, rubbing your clit and letting out little mules and whines. The sight of him getting off was so hot to you-seeing the mix of pleasure and the torture on his face making you drip. Picking up the pace, you let out loud moans. You couldn't take your own teasing. You wanted him. Needed him.

"Oh please daddy, please fuck me. I need your cock inside me so baaaad-fuck I'm aching for you, daddy please please please I want to cum all over your cock!"

He pounced on top of you and started moving the head of his cock against your slit, teasing you before pushing himself deep inside you. You both let out moans and groans as you adjusted. George then slowly moves in and out before picking up the pace. You bit your lip as you wanted to take everything in, but he didn't like that.

"C'mon, be a good girl and let daddy hear those pretty noises of yours." He said before taking his cock fully out and slamming back into you, causing you to let out a high pitch moan.

George hid his face against the crook of your neck, feeling the vibrations of his groans on your neck as he left open mouth kisses. "Godric, you're so tight. You make me feel so good." He whispered in your ear.

"Feels so good, daddy...S-so big!" You moaned.

"You like being stretched out like this? Like when daddy's all the way deep inside you like this?"

You clenched around his cock, feeling the knot in your stomach getting tighter again. "You wanna cum for me, little one? Wanna make a mess over daddy's cock?"

"Yesyesyes please daddy let me cum! I'm so c-close. Don't stop don't stop don't stop!" Your nails were digging into his back, dragging them down and leaving marks. He hissed at the pain out of pleasure, chuckling breathlessly against your skin as you felt him twitch inside you.

George placed his hand on top of yours, interlocking your fingers together. "Fuck I'm close, too. You ready for my cum? You wanna cum with me?"

"Please daddy, fill me up with your cum. Please cum with me...ooooh fuck iwannacumiwannacumiwannacuuuummm!"

"Cum," he growled, "cum with daddy. Let g-goooo fuuuuuckk!"

"i'mcummingi'mcummingi'mcummingggg!"

The knot in your stomach broke, spilling curse word after course word from your lips as you felt your walls being coated in his warmth. George bit your shoulder as he rode out both your highs. He stayed inside for a few moments before slowly pulling out, watching it pour out of you and onto his bed.

"That's so hot." He finally said.

You let out a weak chuckle. "We should've thought about a towel." You joked, making him giggle a little bit.

George got off the bed and went into his bathroom, grabbing a wet wash cloth to clean you up. When he was finished, he lay beside you, wrapping his arm around you and letting your wrap yours around his waist. You snuggled your head into his chest, the feeling of his comfort taking over you.

"You did so good, bubs." He said, kissing the top of your head as you felt the tips of his fingers softly moving against your arm.

"I never thought of you as one with a daddy kink, but it is really hot." you said softly, already feeling yourself drifting in and out.

"Oh, I was going easy on you there. There's more that I want to show you."

"Well, I'll be ready for when that time comes. But right now I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open."

"What, no round two?"

"I love you, Weasley." You said, rolling your eyes at him as your eyes closed.

"Love you, too, Y/L/N."

[gummygowon]

finger paint | choi san

word count: 1.3k 

genre: fluff

established relationship!

warnings: san just makes a sex joke but that’s it 

request: hello hello could i request san with an artist!reader? like they're dating but he's also her muse and she paints him and hfjsjfjd pure fluff ig? also congrats on 100!! deserved

a/n: thank you!! <3 i hope you enjoy! ps. thank you for helping me with literally everything lol

“choi san!” you scolded your boyfriend as he kept moving wayyy too much for you to sketch his body.

“i’m sorry, i can’t help it. but you gave me something really boring to do.” san apologized as he motioned towards the english textbook you gave him. 

you sighed in annoyance thinking of other ways to occupy your boyfriend enough for him to stay still since you current art project was to capture someone in the act of doing something. so of course, you choose to paint san since it was another excuse for you to marvel at your boyfriend plus you got to spend even more time with him and get your schoolwork done. it was a three birds one stone type thing you know?

at first, you asked him to dance for you. letting him freestyle to whatever song was playing. if i’m being honest, you spent the first five minutes just watching san dance. you were absolutely entranced by the way he moved his body so effortlessly and smoothly. 

san had caught on to your staring and teased you for it. “are you gonna start drawing or are you just gonna keep your mouth open? because i’ll give you a reason to keep it open.”

your immediate reaction was to throw whatever was in your reach at him. your weapon of choice was an eraser that hit him square in the forehead. 

“ouch.” he pouted as he rubbed the targeted spot.

“that’s on you.” you defended as you picked up the eraser he threw back at you, your cheeks a pretty pink. “can you get back to dancing now please?”

“you sure? because i-”

“san!” you shouted at him as you pointed your pencil at him threateningly. 

“ok! ok!” he said immediately as he jogged back to his phone to hit play again.

as the music went on, the more you realized it was hard to capture a single dance move. you were getting frustrated each time you had to erase your page. 

“baby, is it okay if you can do something else?” you shyly asked him, feeling bad that he has to switch activities for you.

“sure, of course. what do you have in mind?” he asked you as he lowered the music.

this is how you were left with a twitchy san, who wouldn’t sit still while you tried to sketch him. he always changed his position every few minutes or so claiming that he couldn’t get comfortable. finally, you got tired of san changing positions which led to you slightly snapping at him.

but then a bright idea popped into your head.

there was an art sale at your local target which resulted in you buying some mediocre art supplies for your art students that you had lessons with during the week. you rushed into your storage closet, digging around bins and bags looking for the five-color finger paint set that you never used.

“where did you go?” your boyfriend asked as you returned with a palette and the bottles of paint in your arms. 

“i had to get something.” you answered as you sat back down on the floor, cracking open the paint, secretly praying that they weren’t dry and chunky. fortunately, your prayers were heard and the paint squeezed out the bottles with ease. 

“what’s that for?” san asked pointing to the paint bottle in your hand as he crouched down, “i thought you weren’t done with the sketch?”

“i’m not.” you handed the palette to him, “this is for you.”

“but where am i supposed to paint?” he asked you as he dipped a finger into one of the blobs of paint. 

“good question.” you replied back, motioning for him to sit. you didn’t have any spare canvases to use since you were already on a tight budget plus regular printer paper would just bleed through. you thought carefully about what other surfaces san could use to paint. a white board could work or maybe a-

“what the hell-” you shouted as you felt something touch your knee. you looked down to see san slowly removing his finger from your body, a glob of blue paint still stuck on his finger where a half drawn smiley face was left on your knee.

“i’m sorry.” san replied quickly as he removed his finger and went to go wipe it off. 

“wait.” you pushed his hand away from your leg. if you didn’t have any surfaces for him to paint on, then why don’t you become one? the paint was washable since it was made to be on skin plus you aren’t wasting any more art supplies. 

bingo

“you can keep painting-”

“on your legs?” san interrupted, giving you an odd look. 

“yeah, they’re fingerpaints it’s okay.” you smiled at him before picking up your sketchbook again. 

the pink haired boy shrugged his shoulders and picked up the palette of paint before returning your body. the first thing he did was finish his smiley face on your knee. then he started to dragging his finger around your calf after quietly asking you for to raise your legs, which created a long green line that wrapped around the bottom part of your leg. next, san used his middle finger to dip it into a pretty red color to make a flower right on top of the green line and then he dipped his pinky into some yellow to create the middle of the flower. after alternating between colors and fingers, san had managed to create a pretty vine that had a different colored flower every few inches. he also threw in a few small bees around the plant. 

before continuing to paint the other leg, san had stolen a glance at you. he felt a smile form on his face as he watched your hands glide against the paper smoothly and skillfully with your bottom lip tucked underneath the top one. sunlight falling on you, making your skin glow. san could feel his heartbeat quicken, the longer he stared. he never imagined being able to date someone as lovely and amazing as you. someone who was able to love him but also be his best friend. someone who he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life. 

you could feel your boyfriend’s gaze on you which slowly made you look up from your sketchbook, “what?” is there something on my face?”

“huh? oh no.” san answered as he watched you perked your head up, making eye contact with him. he could feel his heartbeat even faster when your face broke into smile. fuck. he really was in love. 

“what is it?” you asked, a laugh escaping your mouth as you looked at your flustered boyfriend.

“nothing, i just love you.” he replied, gaining some composure. 

now it was your turn to get flustered. you could feel heat rush to your cheeks for the twentieth time today. damn, the things this boy did to you. dating san was full of surprises, cute cuddly moments turning into heated ones. but the biggest one to you was the thought of spending your futures together. he was your only partner that your mind really brought up about spending the rest of your life with someone you love so much. now it was a clearer answer. 

yes, you would spend the rest of you life with choi san. your best friend, boyfriend, and muse. the person who would have your back for life, no matter what. 

“do i not get a ‘i love you’ back?” san pouted with his fingers still covered in paint. 

“yeah.” you teased him, an annoying smile plastered on your face as you dipped a finger into the paint. it was quite obvious that you loved the pink haired boy back but you wanted to mess with him after he wouldn’t sit still. 

“whyyy? that’s not-”

you cut him off by poking his cheek with the finger covered in a bright blue.

“hey!” he shouted at you before reaching to grab a leg but you got up so quickly and sprinted away from his touch. “come back here! i want my ‘i love you’ !”

[amarimaryllis]

I Do Not Think I Would (Bokuto x Reader)

Pairing: Bokuto/Reader

Prompt/Summary: The rational side of you tells you to leave, but for Bokuto Koutarou, you choose to stay. Alternatively, Bokuto Koutarou’s fangirls are ruthless.

Tags: Angst, Fluff, Haikyuu Timeskip Spoilers

Note: I used she/her pronouns for the reader, Bold Italicized sentences are excerpts from the poem “Love is Not All” by Edna St. Vincent Millay

Warnings: Mild Swearing, Mentions of self-hate, Mentions of insecurity, Bokuto has toxic fans

Part of A Sensitivity to Ephemera

You met Bokuto Koutarou in your 3rd year at Fukurodani, but you had known of his existence for longer. It was hard to not know of Bokuto Koutarou if you studied in Fukurodani. Hell, it was hard to not know of him if you studied in Tokyo in general. Aside from the fact that he was the embodiment of solar energy, Bokuto Koutarou also had a ton of admirers.

Fangirls

Fanboys.

And everything in between and beyond.

However, the first time you ever interacted with him was in Honda-sensei’s room. It was quick, a brief encounter that promised longer ones. Bokuto’s grades had been slipping, and you were his assigned tutor.

“Bokuto-san, this is L/N-san from Class 6.” Honda-sensei introduces you two briefly. “She’ll be tutoring you until your grades are back to… Satisfactory. I trust you to not give her a hard time.”

“Nice to meet you, L/N-san!” Bokuto bows briefly, the grin plastered on his face, unfading. However, there’s a sense of urgency in his stance, vibrating, itching to run off. Probably because he had volleyball training, and nothing in this world could keep Bokuto Koutarou from his beloved sport.

You didn’t know why, but your heart was beating a little bit faster than normal.

Love is not all: it is not meat nor drink

Nor slumber nor a roof against the rain;

After a few weeks of tutoring, Bokuto’s grades were slowly getting better. It wasn’t “satisfactory” yet, according to Honda-sensei, but you guys were getting there. As a celebration, right after volleyball practice, Bokuto drags you to the closest cafe and tells you to choose anything you want because it was “on him” as he enthusiastically stated.

“Bokuto-san, you didn’t have to.” You mumble bashfully as Bokuto sets a tray down and seats across from you.

“Don’t worry about it!” Bokuto grins as he slides the food over to you. “It’s the least I can do since you’ve been such a great tutor.”

A small smile makes its way to your face. “I guess I’ll take it then. Thank you for the food!”

As you eat, you can see Bokuto’s eyes continuously flitting back and forth between a spot on your face and away from it. He looked hesitant, but your sudden speaking urges him to reply.

“Is there anything on my face?” You furrow your brows, raising a hand to wipe at your cheek.

“Ah yeah, wait, not there.” Bokuto reaches over the table, a large hand cupping your cheek before he presses his thumb to the corner of your mouth and swipes to remove whatever it was on your face. “You had sauce on your face.”

Fire and ice could co-exist at once, you concluded. Because if it didn’t, then you would like to present yourself as evidence. You were frozen, but inside you, there was an inferno of different emotions swirling, sparked by a single touch on your skin.

That night, after Bokuto had walked you home and you had settled in for the night, you dreamt of black and white streaks paired with the brightest golden eyes. You let yourself dream. You knew that this was the closest you could get to him. The real world wasn’t as kind to you after all.

While you slept soundly, Bokuto walked home. It was raining, but it didn’t matter to him because as the rain drops onto his skin, he wished that it was your touch that fell upon him instead. And for a second as he imagines, it almost felt like it was.

And though he so desperately wished for it as he lied in bed, slumber never came. Instead, in its place, were a hundred different stories, a hundred different futures, a hundred different lifetimes, and they all ended with the sight of a bashful smile, and the prettiest eyes.

Love can not fill the thickened lung with breath,

Nor clean the blood, nor set the fractured bone;

You gripped at your skirt tightly, fighting back the tears that threatened to escape your eyes. Fear gripped your chest as you watched Bokuto’s sleeping figure from your place on the chair beside the bed. There had been a small accident during Fukurodani’s practice match, a small collision, but it was enough to send him to the infirmary and you running after him.

It was stupid, you think to yourself. You had rushed to the clinic the moment your break started, and by the time you reached the room, you were a mess. The nurse only gave you a cheeky smile before she patted your back and said, “Don’t worry about your boyfriend. It’s a minor injury and it was probably just an ant bite for someone like him.”

Ant bites didn’t usually require sleep for recovery.

Also, he wasn’t your boyfriend, but you’d be the biggest liar on earth if you said that you didn’t want him to be. You were just his tutor. Sure you’d been tutoring him for a long time, and that was enough to form a friendship of sorts, but that was all you’ll ever be: a friend. So why were you acting like you were something more? Friends get concerned, they’ll drop by, check on you, go off once they realize it’s minor and you’re in good hands, and then wait for you to recover. They don’t stay, fussing, practically crying, and worrying over something so small.

You’re so caught up in your thoughts that the sudden placement of a heavy palm on your head startles you.

Bokuto chuckles as he takes in your disheveled state. Your eyes are damp, your hair is slightly messed up, and your skirt is still tight in your grip, but even then, he still couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the way you looked. “Hey hey hey, did I make you worry that much?”

You can’t help it. He’s recovering, you know that, but you couldn’t stop yourself from lunging at him and enveloping him in a hug. “I hate you so much. Promise me you’ll never make me worry like that ever again.”

Bokuto chuckles and you could feel the vibrations since you two were practically chest-to-chest. “If making you worry means you’ll hug me like this, then I don’t think I can make any promises.”

“Bokuto-san…” You attempt to pull away, but find yourself unable.

Sturdy arms wrap around your waist, and your frozen figure is pulled tighter against Bokuto’s body as he engulfs you with his larger frame. “Do you like me, Y/N-chan?”

You freeze.

Oh hell no.

Out of all the conversations in this world, this one was the one you did not want to have, especially not when you were emotionally vulnerable. You didn’t know if you had enough control over yourself to give the proper answers.

“What? No! I mean yes? You’re my friend, of course I like you.” Your fight or flight response to this conversation seems to have given you ample strength to pull away. You attempt to stand straight and face this problem head on, but your feet are pointing you towards the exit.

Ready to run. From this conversation. From your feelings. From rejection.

Bokuto raises a brow, a teasing grin on his face. “Oh, really?”

Contrary to popular belief (see: Honda-sensei), Bokuto Koutarou was not stupid. Very far from it. While he’s not academically gifted, he’s definitely smart on the people side of things.

You were an open book, and Bokuto was taking his time rereading every page.

“I…” You’re unable to answer, unable to find the words that would make the impending rejection hurt less.

“Well, if it helps—“ Bokuto sits up and sets his feet on the ground, lightly grabbing you to make you stand between his legs. “—I like you a lot.”

Your heart stops. Your world stops. Everything just stops. You’re gaping at Bokuto, mouth closing and opening as you try to find the proper words. You want to reply, eloquently, confidently, to save what’s left of your dignity, but you can only blink back at him.

You weren’t expecting this. Bokuto wasn’t expecting this.

A wave of uncertainty flashes through Bokuto’s eyes, and for a second, he wonders if he misread the situation. “Hey, it’s ok if you don’t feel the same—“

“Wait, no! That’s—“ You take in a deep breath, attempting to calm your racing heart as you try to find your next words. For someone who usually kept a level head, you sure weren’t acting like it. “That’s not it at all. I just… Are you sure?”

Bokuto is confused. He could understand the words individually. He could understand the sentence too, but he couldn’t understand its relevance in this context. What did you mean by ‘are you sure?’. Would he tell you if he wasn’t? Why wouldn’t anyone be sure about you? I mean, it’s you.

“Yes? Why wouldn’t I be?” Bokuto grabs your hand, and he laces his fingers through yours.

You don’t answer as you attempt to arrange your whirlwind of insecurity into one coherent sentence that could sum it all up. You didn’t want to burden him with an entire monologue of self-deprecation, but you couldn’t find a way to express the years of insecurity into one sentence that could do that feeling justice.

Bokuto sees this, and his heart breaks for a second. He was familiar with it. He knew those feelings all too well.

Uncertainty.

Doubt.

Self-Hatred.

“Can I kiss you?” Bokuto blurts out, and as he watches you get flustered, he thinks that this is a much better look on you compared to the one you were previously wearing.

You don’t speak. You just nod.

With that, Bokuto grabs you by the waist and reaches up to press his lips against yours.

It was Bokuto who broke the kiss, breathless as he pressed his forehead to yours. It was almost as if you had taken his breath away to breathe a new life into him with a simple kiss. You can feel his warm breath against your lips, his calloused hands gripping at your waist, and at the same time, you feel nothing. Maybe this is what it felt like to know of everything and nothing all at once. Hyperaware of every feeling, every part of your body that was connected to his, but at the same time you felt weightless, floating on a plane that didn’t seem to exist on earth.

“Can I do that again?” Bokut asks with a grin.

You don’t answer, simply grabbing at his collar and smashing your lips against his.

That was how your love story with Bokuto Koutarou started.

And you wish it ended there.

It well may be that in a difficult hour,

Pinned down by pain and moaning for release,

Bokuto’s fans were ruthless.

Bokuto’s fans are ruthless.

The toxic fangirls? Even more so.

Not all of them are terrible to you, some are kind, but there are enough bad apples that you start wanting to run away the moment you see the tree. His fangirls during highschool only ever went as far as gossipping and making snide remarks, but now that you were older and Bokuto was part of the MSBY Black Jackals, they had gotten worse.

Facebook? You don’t spend time there anyway.

Instagram? You’ve always avoided that place.

Twitter? Ah, good luck.

People are ruthless when they hide behind a screen and a fake name. Anonymity has a way of sparking bravery in even the most sheltered souls. There wasn’t a single tweet on your account that had no comment telling you how you’re not good enough, how Bokuto probably only stayed out of pity, how he’d probably break up with you soon, how they could make him happier than someone like you ever could.

Bokuto doesn’t know. He doesn’t have to know. You don’t want to tell him.

You’re never going to tell him.

It’s pathetic, you think to yourself. You’re afraid that if Bokuto saw these comments, the rose-colored glasses he wore would shatter. You were afraid that these tweets would tip him off the edge and plunge him into the sea of realization. The realization that he could do so much better than someone like you.

You were tired. So tired that you just want to give in to the comments and leave. It’s logical, after all. Bokuto would find someone much better than you. He’d go off, marry a girl deserving of him, and she’ll give him a family, a future, and a life worthy of someone like him. And you? You’d be free. Alone, heart destroyed beyond repair, but free. You could move on, move away, move as far as you could: out of sight, out of mind. It was so easy.

Or nagged by want past resolution’s power,

But you couldn’t.

The only thing you could do was stare at the tweets that dissected each and every single one of your insecurities and laid it bare, waved it around freely for the world to see and judge. You could only let the tears fall as the laptop screen glared back at your face. Everything is numb and you don’t feel like yourself as you scroll through every single comment and find yourself agreeing with each and every single one.

Sobs wrack throughout your body as it all becomes too much.

You’re too weak to stay, too weak to leave. So where do you go? Where the hell are you supposed to place yourself in this world when it feels like everything is going against you? Why was the world doing this to you? Why did it have to be you? You weren’t strong enough for this. You weren’t good enough for this, you never were, never are, and never will be--

“Love?”

You immediately slam the laptop shut and throw the covers over your body as if you had been there the whole time instead of sitting at the edge of the bed and crying over comments.

“Hey…” The side of the bed sinks. “Bad day?”

The fucking worst. You thought to yourself, but you only shook your head before burying your head deeper into the covers of your shared bed.

“Don’t wanna talk about it?” You can hear the worry in Bokuto’s voice as he places his hand on your waist over the blanket, rubbing up and down to soothe you.

Some part of you finds the courage to speak, and the words tumble out of your mouth faster than your brain can process them. “Why are you still with me?”

“Because I love you.” Bokuto doesn’t hesitate as he looks at your still-covered figure.

“What if you stop?” You mumble, but it was loud enough for Bokuto to hear,

“Not possible.” Bokuto gently pries the blankets away from you, uncovering your form that was curled up into a fetal position.

“But— Just—“ You turn the other way, unable to look at him. “What if you do?”

“Like I said—” You can feel the mattress behind you dip lower, sturdy arms moving to wrap around your waist as Bokuto nuzzles his face into your nape. “—not possible.”

With that, the tears start flowing once more.

You bury your face into the pillow, not wanting to show Bokuto because you knew that the sight of you crying wasn’t something he liked. He hated seeing you in distress, and he hated that the only thing he could do was talk you through it and comfort you.

“Hey hey hey…” Bokuto pulls away and makes you sit up straight before he sits against the headboard and pulls you to sob into his chest. “Where’s this coming from? What’s wrong?”

“Everything’s wrong.” You spat angrily, your grip on his shirt tightening. Anger at yourself, anger at the universe, all summed up in a single sentence. “Nothing ever goes right anymore, and I’m just—“

Your speaking is interrupted as another wave of sobs. “I’m so tired.”

You can feel Bokuto freeze, his hand that was rubbing your back stopping as he takes in your words. “Of what?”

“Everything.” You murmur, your grip on Bokuto’s shirt loosening as you press your forehead against his neck. “Just everything.”

“Does that include me?” You can hear Bokuto’s voice waver as his grip around you gets weaker. “Are you… Are you breaking up with me?”

You’re silent for a while. Was this it? Was the universe making the choice for you?

Whatever it was, you take it.

You pull away and look down, unable to stare into Bokuto’s eyes. You didn’t know if you could pull through if you could see the look on his face as you say your next words. “If it means that it will all stop, then maybe I should.”

Bokuto’s heart shatters, and his world follows in its footsteps. He can feel the tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. He knew you had been acting off the past few days, but he gave you some space so that you could sort it out until you were ready to finally approach him. But this? He wasn’t prepared for this.

“Why?” There’s a painful tug at your chest as you hear Bokuto speak in such a broken tone. “Did I do something wrong?”

“It’s not you. It’s me.” You cringe inwardly at your statement. Of all the things you could’ve said, you just had to say the most overused line in all of break-up history. “Bokuto, you—“

“It’s Kou.” You can hear Bokuto’s voice crack at the end. “It’s not Bokuto to you, Y/N. It’s Kou. Whatever it is just tell me, please I can fix it—“

“I’m the problem, okay?!” You couldn’t stop yourself from raising your tone, standing up from the bed to distance yourself from Bokuto. “I’m not good enough for you. I don’t deserve you. They’re right when they say that you could do so much better than me—“

You’re cut off as a sob pulls itself from your chest. Your chest is tight, your head is throbbing. Your legs are shaky and you couldn’t stop yourself from falling to your knees as you continue to cry. “I-I just… I know I don’t, but I-I’m so tired of b-being constantly r-reminded that I’m never g-going to be enough.”

“Y/N, none of that is true. Who told you that?” Bokuto’s tone gives away the pain he was feeling, but there was a hint of anger underneath it all.

You don’t answer, shaking your head, continuing to sob as Bokuto moves from the bed to kneel in front of you.

“Love, who told you that?” Bokuto places a comforting hand on your thigh as his other hand lightly grabs you by the chin to make you look at him.

“Everyone.” You wondered how pathetic you looked in his eyes right now. “Not a single day passes by where I’m not reminded by your fans. It’s stupid to keep listening to them, but they’re right—“

Bokuto cuts you off with a brief kiss, just enough to shut you up to give him a chance to speak as he moves to cup your cheek in his palm. “No, they’re not. They never will be.”

You don’t reply. You don’t argue, but you don’t agree either.

“Don’t break up with me, please.” Bokuto cups your face with both of his hands, occasionally brushing his thumb over your cheek as he presses his forehead against yours. “You mean the world to me. You’re absolutely perfect the way you are, and I know you don't believe that.”

You sob at that, and Bokuto is quick to press a kiss against your forehead and pull you into his chest. “If I have to spend my entire life reminding you of that then I will.”

I might be driven to sell your love for peace,

Or trade the memory of this night for food.

Bokuto hovers over you, his arms on either side of your holding him up as he looks at you with the most lovestruck look you’ve ever seen on someone.

“You’re perfect.” Bokuto whispers against your lips before he presses a searing kiss against your lips. “Absolutely perfect.”

Bokuto presses his weight against yours, pulling your bodies closer to each other as he continues to kiss you breathless. You wrap your arms around his neck, an attempt to blur the boundaries of skin, muscle, and bone that separate your soul and his. He pulls you closer against him, his fingers digging deeper into the flesh of your hips as he trails his kisses down your neck and every expanse of skin that was laid bare for him.

“I love you so much.” Bokuto whispers repeatedly against your skin between every kiss he puts on you. “So much.”

As you laid beside Bokuto, his arms wrapped around your waist and your face nuzzling into his bare chest, the thoughts of ever leaving slowly become more distant and fade away into oblivion. His chest rises and falls, and you find your breathing slowly matching his as you observe his sleeping face, peaceful, unbothered by all the troubles of the world beyond your bedroom.

You smile to yourself. All rational thought tells you to leave, but for Bokuto Koutarou...

It well may be. I do not think I would.

A/N: That’s two parts of the collection down, and three more to go! This one was supposed to be the lightest out of the five, but my finger slipped so... Whoops? HAHAHAGDHDHSJHS Anyway, I hope you guys like this one! 💖

[rekrappeter]

Good Enough || s.r

pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader

warnings: overthinking | cursing | low mood | insecurities |  lmk if I have missed anything ♡

word count: 1.9k

a/n: thank you for the love on my first fic, I hope this one loves up to expectations. i pretty much just wrote this in order to comfort my own insecurities so maybe other people can relate. my requests will always be open  ♡

That evening your phone had gone off every couple of minutes, blasting your obnoxious ringtone over and over again; yet it was still on your kitchen counter where you left it that morning. You refused to pick it up, not wanting to look at the numerous text messages and missed calls that were on the home page. It was Sunday and your boyfriend was due to return from work, but over the last three days that he was gone, you had fallen into an awfully big hole of overthinking. 

Seventy-two hours was a long time to have your brain constantly telling you that you weren’t good enough for the man that you called your boyfriend, Spencer Reid. Take away the few hours that you were sleeping in between, the last three days have been nothing but torture for you. Hence, the reason that you were ignoring his phone calls. He had just finished a case with the FBI, the last thing he had to deal with was you being low and insecure. It had taken six months for these feelings to start surfacing within your mind but once you started shedding the tears, there was no going back.

Spencer sighed in frustration, his phone indicating that he was running on low battery. He quickly clicked into your name again, watching the phone dial your number before the screen went completely black. Spencer hissed a number of curse words that gained the attention of his male companion, who was sitting closest to him in the bullpen. Derek’s brows creased together and he dropped the pen that he was playing with to focus his attention on the young doctor. 

“You ok, kid?” He asked, turning in his office chair to face Spencer’s desk.

Spencer looked up from his dead phone that he tossed by his pile of files, his curls hanging loosely over his face. His mouth opened and closed for a minute, reluctant to get advice from Derek before he shrugged it off. “Nothing.” He simply replied. 

Derek hummed in acknowledgement, “Very rarely do I hear Dr. Reid curse, but if you would rather me get Penelope or JJ to question you, I can do that.” 

“Please don’t do that,” The skinny brunette whined softly, weighing out the options in his head before deciding to trust Derek on this one. “It’s Y/N. She hasn’t been answering my calls all day.” 

“Ah, girl problems.” Derek teased, his pearl whites gleaming under the bright lights in the bullpen. 

Spencer groaned, standing up from his desk. “Forget about it.” He snapped, starting to pack up his belongings to head home for the night.

“Kid, I’m joking. Look, you’ve been gone for three days. Just pop by her apartment on your way home, okay?” Derek suggested which earned a grimace from Spencer, “Bring flowers, tell her you missed her.” 

“I did miss her.” Spencer sighed, his hand brushing his hair from his face.

“Exactly. You have been going out for six months, it shouldn’t be strange just dropping by.” 

“Um, okay… Thanks, Derek.” The younger boy replied, forcing a shy smile in his direction. 

Spencer started walking out of the combined offices before Derek’s voice halted him, he looked over his shoulder. “Behave, you minx.” This only resulted in Spencer rolling his eyes and stalking out of the room towards the elevators. On the way to your place, his thoughts began to linger, maybe it was a bad idea just to show up. He shouldn’t be this nervous going to be his girlfriend’s house but deep down, he knew there was something wrong. You always replied to his messages and never once sent his calls to voicemail. His thoughts started to jump to different conclusions, did he do something wrong and not realize it? 

 The sudden silence was oddly irking you; your phone had stopped ringing and you didn’t notice that you were taking comfort from your ringtone until it was gone. You couldn’t say you blamed Spencer for giving up trying to contact you, it wasn’t your intention on keeping him on the ropes all day. It was just that you weren’t sure that you were going to be able to answer the phone and pretend like everything was fine. You couldn’t pretend anymore that you lived up to his standard; he was the most intelligent man you have ever met, with a number of PhDs and BAs, and you just about got your BA degree. It was silly for you to compare yourself to an actual genius but it was more so the fact that he deserved someone that he could hold an actual factual and statistical conversation with; not someone that had to research nearly everything that he brought up. 

The empty feeling in your stomach from not eating all day came alive and you climbed out of bed, catching a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were puffed and your hair was a bird’s nest, the fact that overthinking caused you to look and feel like this made you even sicker. You had just reached your kitchen door when the sound of your doorbell blasted around the apartment, grimacing you knew exactly who it was going to be. You weren’t expecting anyone else to appear at your door at eleven in the evening. 

You slowly walked to the door, your sock-clad feet sliding across the wooden floors. You peeked through the peephole and your heart soared with the sight of an exhausted looking Spencer standing there, a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his grasp. 

Opening the door, you hid half of your body with it but worry immediately covered Spencer’s expression. “Hi…” He said, his voice soft and he tried to step forward but you didn’t budge the door, “What’s wrong?” 

“Spence, I just want to be alone for a little while.” You whispered, avoiding his begging honey-brown eyes that were drooping. His heart tugged at the sound of your voice croaking, and it confirmed his theory that you had spent hours upon hours crying. “I’m sorry-” You attempted to close the door but Spencer stuck his foot in the way and you sighed, knowing he wasn’t going to let this drop.

“I can’t leave here knowing that you’re hurting. Let me in, talk to me.” Spencer begged, and you couldn’t deny him entry anymore. It killed you seeing him looking so worried. As soon as Spencer stepped foot into your apartment, he wrapped his arms around you. The flowers brushed the back of your head and you collapsed into his embrace. He was warm and you were thankful that he was wearing a grey sweater, it felt soft against your skin and when you breathed in his scent of coffee and cotton detergent, you felt grounded again. His lips pecked into the side of your head, a hand coming up to caress your cheek as he pulled away. “Why are you crying, princess?” 

“I’m not crying now…” You replied, a pout evident on your face. 

“Why were you crying?” Spencer corrected himself, no hint of the worry lessening on his features. 

“I… It’s nothing.” 

“Clearly it is something. Tell me.” Spencer pushed, his thumb rubbing up and down your cheek gently. You sighed, your eyes closing which resulted in a tear escaping down your cheeks, running onto his fingers. “Oh, baby.” 

“Spence…” You started, reaching to cover his hand with yours and you peeled it off your face. “I have spent the last three days thinking and thinking and thinking…” 

“About what?” Spencer wrapped his fingers around yours, a feeling of heaviness erupting in his stomach. 

“You deserve someone so much better than me-” 

“Don’t start, Y/N, please…” Spencer’s head dropped, sadness radiating from the pair of you. 

“No, no, let me finish. Please.” You begged, he nodded in response and watched as you took a shaking breath in. The rant that you had created in the shower two days ago flowed off your tongue in one breath. “You deserve someone that matches your personality more than I do, someone that reads more books or watches old films in different languages. You need someone to challenge you in an intellectual way and I… I just can’t do that. I’m average when it comes to general knowledge, hell, I don’t even know what my IQ is. A… And I don’t want you to wake up one morning bored and regretting ever starting this.” 

Spencer whimpered softly, stepping closer to your shaking body. You avoided eye contact again but he reached behind you to place the flowers on the locker and he cupped your face with both of his hands. “Look at me.” He snapped softly, it was forceful but filled with love. He used his thumb to wipe the fresh tears away. 

“Spence…”

“No. Listen to me. The last six months have been the happiest days of my life.” You tried to object but he shushed you, “Listen to me.” He repeated, squeezing your face slightly and you sunk into his touch again. His lips were trembling but they remained their pink shade similar to the tint in his cheeks. “I don’t want someone to challenge me, I challenge myself enough. I want someone that makes me laugh, makes me happy, makes me feel like a kid again. You bring out a side to me I didn’t know even existed, you brought light back into my life and I enjoy teaching you things. I don’t want you to recite the whole Bible for me, I don’t need that. I just need you, I need you being happy and yourself because I love you and you are too good for me.” Spencer whispered the last sentence, and he sucked in a breath. 

“You’ve never said that before.” You replied, your heart beating rapidly against your chest. 

“I never thought I’d make you feel that you’re were not good enough.” 

Your heart sank at his words, regret cursing through your veins. “It wasn’t you, Spence. It was all up there.” You muttered, pointing to your head and for the first time that evening, Spencer shot you one of his smiles. The one that showed that he understood. 

“Just promise me one thing.” 

“Anything.” You replied, wrapping your arms around his torso. 

Spencer smiled at the gesture and brought his lips down to yours, connecting them gently. Your eyes fluttered closed, embracing every erupting feeling that he was setting off. His hand slid into your mess of hair, bringing your closer and he deepened the kiss. His tongue danced around yours, and you were melting into him with every passing second. Just as a moan escaped passed your lips, Spencer pulled away. “Talk to me if you ever feel like this again.” 

You nodded in response and he was happy with that. Spencer untangled himself from you and picked the flowers back up, he walked deeper into your apartment but you stood there, your eyes following his every move. “Spencer,” You called out before he disappeared into the kitchen, he turned to look at you, his eyes sparkling and he waited for you to speak, “I love you too.” 

The smile he returned sent your heart soaring and he shook his head, a chuckle erupting from his stomach. “I know.”

🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻

please please please let me know what you thought of this! It’s my first s.r fic so I would love some feedback!

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

Non-Sequential [Ch. 28]

Pairing: Pre-Serum Steve Rogers/Steve Rogers x Reader

One night, Steve Rogers met a beautiful dame named Y/N. He hadn’t intended on letting her get away. But fate had other ideas. Y/N appeared and disappeared in his life so hauntingly that Steve started to wonder if she was an angel meant to watch over him.

Word Count: 2,300

Chapter 27

The Battle of Wakanda was simultaneously the shortest and longest day of Steve Rogers’ life.

The dog-like aliens were released in too many droves, making Steve believe they would never stop attacking. Even if Shuri was successful in detaching the stone from Vision, would destroying it even stop these monsters? But Steve didn’t have time to think about that.

Thor’s arrival felt like a blink to Steve. He didn’t have time to process the return of his long-lost friend. The two of them were too busy trying to survive. But Steve somehow seemed to sense the personal ties Thor had in this war.

Steve started to come to on the forest floor. His body quick to recover from being knocked unconscious by Thanos. But it wasn’t fast enough.

He slowly got to his feet and looked up to find Thor pressing his axe into Thanos’ chest. But for some reason, Steve knew it was too soon to celebrate a victory. Something felt off.  

“Nooo!” Thor bellowed just before Thanos snapped his fingers.

A flash blinded Steve as he tried to move forward.

When he regained his vision, Thanos fell backwards into a portal and disappeared.

Steve clutched his side as he made his way to Thor. “Where’d he go?”

Thor said nothing, just remained in a daze and breathed heavily.

“Thor?” Steve begged. “Where’d he go?”

“Steve?” Bucky’s voice begged for his attention.

But when Steve looked over, Bucky’s body was already disappearing, turning into ash.

With utter shock, Steve slinked to the pile of ash that once was his best friend.

Him and Thor shared a look, finally understanding what was happening.

Everyone regrouped. Well… not everyone.

Steve went to Visions body, colorless and lifeless. The stone was missing from his forehead, proving what they were already figuring out.

“What is this?” Rhodey asked. “What the hell is happening?”

Steve breathed deeply as it all finally made sense. “Oh, God.”

Then her face flashed in his mind.

“Y/N,” he gasped and jumped to his feet.

“Steve…” Nat called after him, but there was no life in her voice. She just sounded scared.

All the injuries he had meant nothing to him now as he sprinted back to the palace at super-soldier speed. It didn’t matter how much his body hurt and protested. All that mattered was getting to her.

He ignored the panicked looks and the various piles of ash that were scattered across the palace hallways.

He shoved his shoulder against the doors of the wing that protected the royal family and Y/N.

When he entered, the Queen Mother whipped around with tears in her eyes.

Steve’s eyes raced around the room, looking for her. “Y/N!” He yelled.

But when he did not find her or receive an answer, his gaze returned to Ramonda.

She simply shook her head.

“No,” Steve whispered as he shook his head. “No.”

“She’s gone,” Ramonda gasped. “Shuri and her...a-and the rest of them.”

First his best friend and now the love of his life.

Tears filled his eyes.

He left, needing to go to her room. Despite the Queen Mother’s words, Steve’s heart wouldn’t believe her. She couldn’t be gone. It could not be true.

But what he found was an empty bedroom. Clean and barren.

It took a second glance around the room to see the envelope that lay waiting on her nightstand.

Steve didn’t know how it caught his eye when he was having a breakdown.

He saw his name written on it – just Steve. But it was Y/N’s handwriting.

His hand shook as he reached out to pick it up.

He already knew what he was going to find waiting for him inside the envelope.

Y/N knew this was coming. She had seen it. Kept the secret hidden as her own burden to bare. Letting everyone else live in blissful ignorance.

Steve,

By the time you find this, I’m sure you will have figured out what has happened. Thanos was successful. And with his success I have been taken from you.

You have also already realized that I knew this was going to happen. I’ve known for…Well, it doesn’t matter how long I’ve known.

I’m sorry I didn’t warn you. I knew it would destroy you, and maybe it would’ve destroyed us. Is it selfish that I just wanted our time together to be spent without the dread of the future looming over our heads?

I know this is not the goodbye you want or need. But this is all we could have.

Steve, I love you. I love you more than I could ever put into words. You know they aren’t my strong suit. But I hope I made you feel that love.

I know you, Steve. I know you will be OK. You were always stronger than me. You can survive missing me, but I would’ve never survived missing you.

I love you, Steve.

Please don’t forget me.

Steve turned the page over, expecting to find more written. 

But that was it.

He wanted more. He needed it. It was a goodbye, but why did he feel like something was missing or that something was off?

The next couple of days were a blur. He hid his feelings. The team needed him. They didn’t need a broken Steve Rogers; they needed Captain America. He wasn’t the only person that lost someone. They all had.

The team decided to return to the compound in New York, regroup and make a plan. Then they discovered Fury’s pager and Carol Danvers explained her relation to it, and Steve allowed himself to feel hope.

But their attack ended in disappointment.

Steve knew in hindsight that it made sense: Y/N wouldn’t have written him a letter saying goodbye if they could bring the world back in a few days.

The solution wasn’t that easy… if there even was a solution.

Now Steve sat on the dock on the lake. The compound’s lights weren’t lit like before – well, everything – making it easier to actually see the stars.

He heard her walking up behind him. But he wasn’t really in the mood for talking. Maybe if he pretended she wasn’t there, she wouldn’t try to engage.

But she’s not one to back down like that.

Nat sat down next to him on the dock, dipping her barefoot into the lake.

“I think I’m going to…get out of here. Thinking about Brooklyn.” Steve spoke first.

“Steve…” She started.

“I can’t stay here, Nat. Everything reminds me of her. The grass on that lawn? Every time I look at it, I think of the night she met me. When I walk into that kitchen, I’m still convinced she’s going to be standing in there waiting for me with a mug of coffee in her hands.”

“So, that’s it? The Avengers are no more?” She challenged.

“We lost, Nat.”

“It was just lost one war, Steve. There will be others. There already are. Carol says–”

But Steve whipped his head to look at her. “We didn’t just lose a war,” he snapped. “I lost everything!” Then he controlled his temper. “She was everything,” he muttered as he looked back onto water.

Nat didn’t say anything more, already knowing when Steve made up his mind, there was no changing it. The only person more stubborn than him was Tony.

“Have you found him yet?” Steve asked her carefully.

She shook her head. “His house arrest bracelet was cut, which can only mean he survived. And there was a call to the compound just minutes after the snap.” Her eyes started watering. “I know he’s out there. But I think Laura and the kids…” She couldn’t even bring herself to say it.

“You shouldn’t stay here,” Steve told her as he looked back at the compound. It was empty and looked lifeless. The agents and scientists that once busied the space were either snapped or had gone back to what family and friends they had left.

Nat ignored his statement.

“Thor’s left. Bruce is acting strange. Tony has clung to Pepper. Rhodey is going back to DC. You shouldn’t be here by yourself, Nat.”

“So, where should I go? To New York City with you?” She challenged.

“Is that such a terrible idea?” He asked.

“I can’t, Steve. I can still help people. I know I can.”

He stood up. “You know…there are other ways to do that than just this.”

———————

Some Time Later…

Steve’s eyes snapped open when he heard the intruder.

His apartment had been restored to keep the character from the time period he was truly from, while being updated enough to be accepted and functional in modern society. But with it came squeaky floorboards and sometimes lack of soundproofing.

But that just meant that there was no mistaking when there was some other presence in his home.

He slipped out of bed completely silent.

Steve didn’t have his shield, but he doubt he would need it to defend himself from a thief. 

Crime had skyrocketed since the snap. Turned out that Thanos’ mission didn’t include only ridding the world of bad people. Some took advantage of the world’s vulnerable state, stealing and killing and assaulting others.

But when Steve peaked around the corner, he didn’t find a burglar.

“It’s just me,” she said gently.

Immediately recognizing the voice, Steve rushed around the corner.

Y/N was waiting for him with the blanket from the couch wrapped around her naked body.

Before she even had a chance to say his name or a hello, Steve was pulling her into his arms. The gesture wasn’t uncommon for him, but it still took her by surprise a bit.

“Hi,” she breathed into his shoulder.

He pulled back a bit, “Hi.”

His eyes and body language were now uncertain.

And Y/N knew why: he was trying to figure out what she knew and where she had come from.

“It’s after his snap?” She asked him quietly, proving that she already was aware and he didn’t have to be careful about what he said to her.

He just nodded sadly. “I’ve missed you,” he whispered.

Steve’s situation was simultaneously lucky and heartbreaking. Unlike his friends that survived, he got glimpses of the person he lost. Y/N’s time traveling that once felt like a curse was now a gift to Steve.

He got to hold her, to be reminded of how her skin felt and what she smelled like and how warm or cold her body felt against his.

Y/N leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. She didn’t want to think about when the last time that he felt her lips.

Steve blinks suddenly. “Sorry! Let me get you some clothes.”

Before she could stop him, he rushed back into his bedroom and started shuffling through drawers, determined to find Y/N’s favorite sweatpants and t-shirt of his.

When he looked up with the clothes in his hands, Y/N was leaning against the doorway with an appreciative grin.

She thanked him as she took the clothes from him.

Steve turned his back to give her some space to change, but he couldn’t find it in him to leave the room and truly give her privacy. He was scared she would disappear at any moment and he didn’t want to miss a second of her visit.

He heard Y/N giggle behind him. It sent a chill down his spine.

“It’s nothing you haven’t seen before, Steve. In fact, you see it quite often.”

He slowly turned to find her already dressed. He cleared his throat, “Sorry. It seems I’m not sure how to act around you anymore.”

She walked up to him and cupped his cheek. “You don’t have to be sorry, Steve.”

He nodded. 

“You’re looking at me as if I’m a ghost,” she whispered to him. 

And in a way, she was. 

Her hands then went to his shoulders. He seemed to preen at her touch, so she’d give him as much of it as she possibly could.

“Can I ask you something?” He muttered.

Steve only said things like that when he was nearing a fine line, when he wanted to ask her something about her time traveling. Something that he already knew she wouldn’t want to tell him.

But Y/N nodded.

“When did you find out?”

He didn’t have to elaborate, Y/N knew what he was asking about.

“Not until I was living in Wakanda.” She kept it generic.

Steve seemed somewhat relieved by it. He couldn’t imagine Y/N keeping the secret of the apocalypse for longer that she already had. A couple years was still torture. But Steve had been imagining the worst, often thinking of a teenage Y/N learning of the end of the world, having it haunt her ever moment.

“I’m sorry,” Steve whimpered. “I’m sorry I didn’t save you.”

Y/N him to her. “Oh, Steve. Shh. There was nothing you could do.”

“I’ve lost so many innocent lives. And I used to tell myself that as long as I had you, I could bare that guilt. But once I lost you…”

Y/N shushed him again. “You’re a hero. No one has ever doubted that. But you’re still just a man, Steven Grant Rogers. And Thanos – Thanos was a titan. A titan with the most powerful weapon in the universe. None of you stood a chance.”

Steve nodded, but she knew it would take more than a few words from her to convince him of that.

“I wish you could stay,” he muttered.

She wiped away some of his tears that had escaped. “I wish I could, too.”

He pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes.

All the tension left him from just the feeling of her. His body hadn’t relaxed since the last time he’d properly held her in his arms – before the snap, before the Battle of Wakanda.

Nevertheless, when he opened his eyes again, Y/N was already gone. The sweatpants and t-shirt she had been wearing piled at his feet.

It was then that Steve wondered if he really was luckier than everyone. Because having to say goodbye to Y/N over and over and over again now felt like a different type of torture.

Maybe her visits were going to become his drug. In the end, they weren’t good for him. But he still craved them like his life depended on them.

-------------------

Chapter 29

Just want to clarify that I have not “returned” from my hiatus or to this tumblr in general. 

Quite frankly this fandom has lost its fucking mind and I’m rather disgusted with the behavior I’ve seen in the past month or so. 

No wonder all of the talented writers have left.

I’m only finishing this stupid series to clear my conscious. But I regretted looking back to see that while +2,500 people follow this series’ masterlist, the past few chapters have received 300 or less notes. And that, I tell you, is one of the reasons I hate it here. 

[tuanhood]

rumor

pairing: kim yugyeom x reader

genre: smut, enemies to lovers au (kind of)

warnings: 18+, public oral sex (female receiving), cursing

word count: 5k+

summary: the bane of your existence, kim yugyeom who has been bothering you consistently for the past 6 months comes to find you in the library, because well... he heard something.

a/n: keeping it going with the smut i GUESS. my russian mother would literally die if she knew i was doing this instead of writing my dissertation. :) this is barely edited but go easy on me OK. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here you were. Another Thursday night in the library, endlessly highlighting the printed-out text in front of you. Your eyes shifted towards the other portion of the table you were sat at. It was filled with papers by students from the course you were TAing for and its placement in front of you was another overwhelming reminder of the work you had to accomplish before the weekend. A thought occurred to you that maybe it was worth it to take a break before you really got into grading, but as you glanced at your phone for the first in what felt like hours, you realized there was no time for a break if you wanted to finish everything on time. 

It wasn’t always like this, you used to have fun, but as time passed and you went on in your collegiate career, there was more time for work and less time for play. You wanted to say a big fuck you to your friend Mark and his “work hard, play hard” motto, because who the hell could do both equally and not ruin their life? 

Just as you were about to text Mark and ask him for 500 words on how his life mantra could be applicable to literally anyone, you heard heavy footsteps coming from somewhere on the floor of the library you occupied and it was almost as if your comfortable atmosphere shifted. As the footsteps grew closer, your body tensed up in preparation for the interruption you felt that you were about to endure. 

“Shove it Yugyeom,” you said without looking up at the tall boy. Kim Yugyeom had bothered you so much in the past 6 months that you practically had a sixth sense for whenever he was within distance. 

“Dude, why are you so mean to me?” 

Sighing, you pinched the bridge of your nose in frustration, “how many times do I have to tell you that just because our moms are friends, doesn’t mean we are.”

He pulled a chair from the table and flipped it with the back facing you, plopping down, his arms folded on the chair’s back. “Okay but the reason I’m here is actually really important.” 

Knowing Yugyeom and judging on his insistent tone, you knew it wasn’t actually going to be important. The two of you had known each other most of your lives because of your respective mother’s being lifelong friends. You had always wondered what it must have been like for them, having such a strong bond of friendship that they would make it a pact to have children at the same time and force them into being friends. Unfortunately for them neither of those things really happened – your mother became pregnant with you and it wasn’t until two years later that Yugyeom’s mother followed. However, despite the small age gap, they still tried to manufacture a friendship between the two of you. By the time you were thirteen, they gave up. 

For months Yugyeom had been finding you on campus and was constantly bothering you with things that he deemed to be paramount, but instead were things such as “what bedding do you think I should get?” or “hey are you going to your mom’s birthday party? Should we carpool?” Obviously, you would be going to your own mother’s party, so why did he have to ask you? All of his questions, comments or concerns, could easily be discussed over text, but for some reason he had to come find you in person. Every. Single. Time. 

At first you blamed it on his age and innocence. He was two years younger than you and his common appearance in your life with things that were “important,” probably had to do with his adjustment to university life. You were the only person he knew, so it was a given that he would come to you with questions or in need of advice. But after 6 months and the large friend group Yugyeom had grown on campus – you knew that had nothing do with it. 

Losing your place in your notes, you groaned and looked up at him, realizing as long as he was in your presence you wouldn’t be able to get any work done, “what is it Yugyeom? What could be so important that you had to come bother me yet again.” 

You noticed Yugyeom cower back a bit at your annoyed tone, clearly striking some kind of nerve within him and it almost made you feel regretful on how you’ve treated him lately. It was certainly much worse than you had been with him in your childhood. 

He clicked his tongue as if signaling that he meant business, “well… I came to ask about a rumor.” 

The order of business that brought Yugyeom into your midst today immediately made you let out a snort from your mouth. He still didn’t understand what “important” meant, even after all this time. You especially didn’t pay any mind to what was or wasn’t going on with Yugyeom’s little friends. Rolling your eyes, you picked up your forgotten highlighter and put it back on the page, you predicted that this visit couldn’t last much longer. “I really don’t care about what’s going on with lower classmen.” 

“It’s not about anyone in my year… It’s about you.” 

You paused, dropping the tool in your hand, once again forgotten, wondering if you had misheard him. Campus was full of hundreds – probably thousands of students more interesting than you. Nothing you’d ever done could be warranted as interesting enough to be circulated throughout campus whether real or not. “Excuse me?” 

“I heard a rumor about you.” And a rumor that was widespread enough that it could somehow make it to Yugyeom? You were certain that he had to be mistaken. 

His eyes looked around the room. You noticed they wandered to the sheets of paper in front of you, your hands and the shelves of books surrounding the table. He licked his lips before speaking to gain confidence before he continued on, “I want to know if it’s true.” 

Usually conversations with Yugyeom contained a lot of back and forth. There was never this much air that left room for thoughtful pauses or awkward silence. It had always been him asking random things or making comments that led to you snapping at him. This time you weren’t really sure what to say. Being so perplexed by the encounter and why he was concerned about a rumor regarding you, left you unsure of how to respond. 

“It’s about you and Park Jinyoung. I want to know if it’s true,” Yugyeom bit his bottom lip so hard, you thought he would draw blood. 

Blankly, you blinked at him, wondering why anyone would be fixated about you and Jinyoung, “first I kind of have to know what the rumor about the two of us is.” 

“Ugh I knew it,” Yugyeom narrowed his eyes at you, and it’s perhaps the first time you’d seen him show any kind of negative emotion. Even after all of your countless ignoring and bitter words towards him in the past, he would always maintain the same bright smile and puppy dog look in his eyes. It was something you actually admired about him. 

“Knew what? I didn’t say anything! I’m asking you what you heard. What the rumor is!” You whisper shouted, in an effort to remind yourself that you were in the library after all. 

“If it wasn’t true you would have just denied it!” Yugyeom insisted. 

Now it was your turn to be angry, through clenched teeth you asked him, “what the fuck is your problem?” 

He stood up briskly and the chair shook from his sudden stance, “you fucking Park Jinyoung, that’s my problem.” You widened your eyes at him, especially since you had hadn’t really ever heard Yugyeom curse, “what?” 

“People are saying you guys slept together.” 

His words caused you to freeze up for a moment, but you felt a need to play it off, to not show your hand. “Yugyeom… Jinyoung and I TA for the same intro Lit class. That’s it. People like to create drama… especially if it’s about their superiors.” The way you defended yourself made the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Ultimately, you had no reason to explain anything to this guy who wasn’t even classified as an acquaintance to you. Kim Yugyeom had no real place in your life. “And why does it matter to you? I can sleep with whoever I want… Not that it’s any of your business or anyone else’s.” 

For some reason you found yourself unable to look up at him. It felt different then the times you simply avoided his gaze as a method of ignoring him in the hopes he would leave. This time you felt just nauseous. First you were being defensive with him and now you felt too nervous to look at him? What was wrong with you? “So, it’s true then, huh?” 

At his words, you sighed, lifting your eyes up slowly to finally look at him again. For a moment, the thought entered your mind to lie and you had to shake the delusion out of your head. Why lie to him? You had nothing to hide, nothing to be ashamed about… and yet why did it cross your mind to be dishonest with Yugyeom, as if to shield him from it? Before you could regretfully change your mind, you responded, “yes, I slept with Jinyoung, but it was literally forever ago. We’re just friends. I don’t understand why it’s even coming up now.” 

It surprised you when you noticed his hands had clenched into fists at his side and you tried to conjure up something in your brain that could explain why he cared about this so much. Your heart pained a little from his aggression and you wondered if you were going to start wondering why you care so much about this. 

“Why do you care?” You asked, rolling your eyes to put on an act of nonchalance. 

“It’s embarrassing!” 

“Why the hell is it embarrassing?” 

His fists finally unclenched and he threw them down in annoyance at your question, as if you were supposed to be able to read his mind. He answered you as if his reasoning was the most obvious thing in the world, “my friends keep teasing me about it!” You couldn’t help but notice the way he whined at the end of his sentence, like a small child being annoyed about finishing their food. 

“Yugyeom… I don’t think I’m following. Why does who I do or don’t sleep with embarrassing for you?” 

“Because…” he took a deep breath in as if contemplating whether he should go on and there was a long pause before he continued, “because it’s embarrassing that this is going around about someone I like.” 

Shock washed over the features on your face. This was it? This was the reason why he had been acting so ridiculous? You certainly weren’t expecting that. “You have feelings for Jinyoung? I-I’m sorry Yugyeom, but I swear it’s in the past… and if it makes you feel any better it wasn’t even that good of-” He cut you off briskly not wanting to hear where you had been going with the thought.

“No, I don’t like Jinyoung.” He rolled his eyes out of frustration at your lack of understanding. 

“Then I don’t know what you’re talk-” this time you cut yourself off when your brain finally caught up to the rest of you. If he didn’t like Jinyoung... that meant he likes the other person in the rumor… and that other person in the rumor was in fact you. Which meant that Yugyeom must like… 

“Me? You like me?” Your voice got higher, a nervous habit that continued to grow whenever you were in a stressful situation. A situation you couldn’t easily see the conclusion of. 

Judging on Yugyeom’s gaze, one could say that the conversation didn’t faze him – that he was confident even, but as you glanced down, you were met with the fidgeting and shuffling of his feet. “Yeah. I do, so what?” 

After all this time and after everything you had said or done to him, he still liked you? 

You looked back up to his face and saw the hard and cold exterior he tried to put up between the two of you. He was attempting to make it seem like he didn’t care. That putting his feelings for you out in the open and holding his heart out in front of you was no big deal. You knew from knowing Yugyeom from all these years that this was no simple feat for him. You knew he was probably shaking inside, nervous and afraid of the rejection that he had expected to come from you. He had put on an act, because he thought that’s what you wanted and because he didn’t want to show you his true feelings when the hurt that he knew was coming finally came. 

You studied his face for a moment, his features and glimpsed into his eyes that you knew would hold how he really felt. 

Yugyeom felt the silence between the two of you get heavier and heavier with every moment that passed. He felt uncomfortable and he just wanted you to tell him what he knew he was probably going to hear from you. “I bet I’m ten times better than Park Jinyoung,” Yugyeom mumbled quietly to himself, clearly not meaning for you to hear it, but hear it you did. 

His words shocked you and you felt a nervous flip in your stomach, but the good kind. For some reason you couldn’t help but think back to Mark’s stupid motto as you looked Yugyeom up and down, checking him out. Before you could process what, you were doing, you began to gather all of your things on the table without a word to Yugyeom. When you were finally done you saw the panic in his face as he wondered if you were just going to leave him without a word. Instead you surprised him, placing your backpack in one hand and you grabbed his hand with the other, “follow me.” 

He didn’t move and you almost fell back against him at his pull, “where are we going?” 

“You’ll see come on,” you rolled your eyes at him and tugged him forward once again towards the stairwell of the library. Both of you climbed the stairs in silence, and you found yourself grateful that he followed you. It was difficult for you to understand what it was about the situation that had you more nervous – that he had come with you or that you were doing this at all. 

When you finally reached the fifth floor you led him through various stacks of books and multiple rows of shelves until you were both in the back corner of the floor. You stopped in between two shelves and he glanced around the books surrounding you, “why are we in medieval literature?” he asked.

“Because no one ever comes up here.” 

He blinked quickly, not understanding your reasoning for bringing him up multiple flights of stairs to be amongst more dusty books. 

“And there are no security cameras up here,” you continued, hoping that something would click for him. If it took him much longer to figure out what you were trying to communicate, you were afraid you might lose your confidence in doing this. You tapped your foot lightly against the ground, “so are you going to show me?” 

“Show you what?” He asked completely oblivious. At this point, he was just grateful that you hadn’t kicked his ass after he had confessed to you. He had to be honest with himself, he hadn’t come to find you expecting to tell you about his feelings for you. He thought they had been clear from the beginning, but after the third or fourth time you had reacted negatively to him appearing in your life during these past 6 months, he figured that you would never see it without him explicitly telling you. And judging on how much you seemed to hate him – he had come to the conclusion that he would never tell you. But after hearing about you and Park Jinyoung from his friend Bambam, he couldn’t stop himself from marching to the one place he knew you would be on Thursday night – the library. 

Yugyeom had always pictured your reaction if he was to tell you about his feelings for you and it always ended with him having a bloody nose, a new bruise or a pain in his foot after you stomped down on it in anger or disgust. The worst part of this situation was that so far you hadn’t done any of these things and for once he didn’t know what to expect when it came to you, somehow that scared him more than being flat out rejected. Wait… maybe you were bringing him up to the isolated section of the library to do your damage and hit him? 

“Jesus fucking Christ Yugyeo-” You cut yourself short when you noticed your hands had involuntarily thrusted towards him, clenching as if you were about to wring his neck and the way your tone shifted to frustration. Exhaling, you relaxed your hands and put them down, rubbing them against your thighs to calm yourself down. You weren’t trying to be your normal self towards Yugyeom, you were trying something… different. Much different. 

It seemed to you that the only way you’d be able to get Yugyeom to well… get it was spelling it out for him. 

“You said you bet you were ten times better than Jinyoung... so show me.”

Nothing leaves Yugyeom’s mouth in response and he stared at you blankly. Had you read this wrong? Were you embarrassing yourself? At his lack of words, you felt your confidence chip away piece by piece and your face grew hot. 

Then everything seemed to fall into place for Yugyeom as his mind begins to compute the words leaving your soft pink lips that he’s wanted to kiss for so long. He noticed the way that your eyes are no longer fixated on him, and instead begin to look over the place nervously, pretending to find the books around the two of you more interesting. 

Due to the lack of response from Yugyeom, you’re surprised when you he takes a step closer towards you and you feel his hot breath near you just as your eyes became glued to a text about women’s literature in the Middle Ages. 

You looked to his brown eyes which stared at you so deeply you felt as though you’re about to suffocate. Although Yugyeom’s always been much taller than you, you’ve always somehow felt bigger than him – older, wiser and more mature. But for the first time ever, under his hypnotic gaze you felt innocent, small and like all you wanted was for him to take care of you. 

As he took another step forward, you took one back until you’re pressed against the bookshelf, unable to take back your decision, but you could feel that deep inside of you that you didn’t want to. Both his hands went to either side above you on the shelf and he looked down at you, a new lustfulness in his eyes that wasn’t there before. “Is this okay?” 

Nodding your head, you bit your lip to stop the smile that dared to spread across your face and Yugyeom caught it immediately. He brought his right hand down to your hair and brushed some of the strands out of your face softly, “you know… you don’t have to pretend to be this cold, mean person all the time… If you want to feel something, you should just… feel it.” At his final words his hand moved to a permanent position on your cheek as he leaned down to connect your lips together. At first you remained frozen, but as his left-hand slides from the bookshelf to land comfortably at your waist as if it was always meant to be there, you melted into the kiss. Your lips parted and his tongue slipped into your waiting mouth softly, without rush or urgency and somehow that gentleness alone made you feel like all that existed was that softness and the mixing of your breaths. 

The slow, sensual pace that you savored soon began to pick up as Yugyeom deepened the kiss, pushing himself closer to you on the shelf. Your hands that had remained mostly stagnant and at your sides soon began to drift up to run through his hair as if they had a mind on their own. When you first heard him let out a small moan from your tugging on his locks, you felt a fire ignite inside of you that told you that you wanted to hear more. With every tug, Yugyeom’s fingers dug into your hips and soon he let out a sigh of content as his hands moved to rest on your ass. Your lips worked seamlessly together as if it was the missing puzzle piece you never knew you needed. 

“Let me show you something else I can do better than Park Jinyoung,” Yugyeom said through a raspy breath, against your lips. His hands squeezed your ass before they moved around to the button on your jeans to undo them. It feels as though he works in slow motion as he pulled down the zipper and moved his hand inside, slipping them over your panties. His lips still on you and his hand in a place where you never thought you would need him; your breath grew heavier and heavier. 

Your knees buckled as Yugyeom’s fingers suddenly brushed your clit through the thin cloth and he grinned into the kiss as he wrapped his arms around your waist to hold you up. You tried to focus on the feeling of Yugyeom’s fingers rubbing your through your underwear, but soon he withdraws them. You whimpered at the loss of his fingers against you and he gave you one last soft peck before he disconnected his mouth from yours as well. You missed the contact, wanting to make your lips even more swollen than they probably already were. 

Yugyeom chuckled at your needy reaction and he caressed your cheek in a reassuring manner, “don’t worry it’ll be worth it.” 

You grew confused, wondering what his next move would be, but as he crouches down onto his knees in front of you, pulling your jeans and underwear down with him it begins to dawn on you. You felt yourself grow more wet at the thought. 

“I need to taste you,” he practically whined, “let me clean up the mess I made between your legs.” If Yugyeom had said anything remotely close to that in the past, you know you would have smacked him across the face, but instead you felt yourself involuntarily moan, turned on by his words. 

Still leant up against the bookshelf, you spread your legs apart, which was proven difficult with the jeans and underwear around your ankles, but Yugyeom grabbed them in an effort to help you. When you were comfortable and well situated, he settled himself between your parted thighs and grew closer. 

First all you felt was his hot breath on your clit and he softly blew to tease you, as if paying you back for all the countless you shrugged him off. When you let out a whimper that sounded a little too desperate, even for your ears, he decided his short-lived teasing was better off short. He took one last look into your eyes before he leaned in without hesitation. His tongue first gave a slow lap as if savoring your taste, and he let out a groan that made you feel more wet than you already were. Soon he began to pick up the pace and he used the way your hips moved against him and the little sighs coming from your mouth to feel what it was that you like and don’t like. When he sealed his mouth around your clit in a soft suck, your hands instinctually went back to his hair to bring him even closer to you. 

“How do you taste so good,” he mumbled mostly to himself, followed by a noisy kiss and delving into you further. 

A sudden and continuous swirl of his tongue against your clit caused you to let out a loud moan that you couldn’t hold back even with all of the strength in your body. With his lips still attached to your clit and continuing his ministrations, he tapped his fingers on your thighs in an effort to remind you to be quiet. You both may have been in a secluded part of the library, but you were still in the library. 

It was when you really looked down at Yugyeom that you felt as though you were going to combust. For some reason to see the younger boy that you had completely written off for most of your life, and especially the last 6 months, with his mouth on your clit with a look of pure satisfaction on his face made you feel closer to your high. 

His sudden harsh sucking as if he was a man eating his last meal, caused you to lift your hips off against the book shelf and into his face further. 

“Yugyeom…” You moaned out with eyes squeezing themselves shut. Hearing his name fall from your lips in bliss – something he had always wanted and dreamed about – edged him to go even harder and faster, wanting nothing more to see you fall apart before him. 

When he slipped two fingers inside of you, pumping them quickly, with his lips still attached to your core, you began to feel dizzy just at the pleasure. He pulled his mouth away for a moment to watch his fingers sink in and out you, pleased to look up and see how overcome you were with the way he was making you feel. You let out another cry when his fingers curled in you, finding your g-spot with ease. When he reattached himself to your clit and his fingers found that spot in you once again, it all became too much and you felt yourself closer to your climax. You tried to push his face away from you, trying to let him know that you were close. 

“Cum on my face. I want it, I want it all,” he said muffled against your core at your effort to move him away from you. 

At his words and the continual, brutal pace of his tongue and fingers, you felt your hips buck into Yugyeom’s face and yourself clench around his fingers, orgasm washing over you hard. You attempted to keep your moans in, but the feeling you get through out your entire body is too much to contain as you let out a load cry from your release. One of your hands left Yugyeom’s hair to aggressively grip the book shelf behind you, causing a book to fall from the shelf and hit part of Yugyeom’s head and his back on the way down. 

“F-Fuck Yugyeom I’m sor-” He shut you up as he continued to lap at your core, letting you ride out your orgasm as if he was in his own world where a book didn’t just fall on him. 

After a few moments in your own blissed out state and deep breaths with your head against the book shelf, you looked to see Yugyeom getting up off of his knees. His mouth and jaw glistened from you and if he minded how wet your release was, he didn’t show any sign of it. On his way up to stand before you, he lifted your underwear and jeans up your legs. 

He smiled smugly, “not bad for a kid, huh?” 

You shyly looked away from him, feeling like the kid. 

“Yeah whatever, Kim Yugyeom,” You said rolling your eyes, and he catches the smile that was written across your face. When your eyes met again, he stared at you so deeply with so much fondness that you felt yourself grow weak for the second time in the last few minutes. 

Bringing your hand up to gently rest on his cheek, you pulled him in for a kiss, wanting to show him the same pleasure he gave you. He let out a loud groan when your hands reached his jeans in an attempt to unbutton them. 

“Um… hello?” 

You both froze at the voice and broke apart to look at each other in panic.

“Shit,” you whispered to him. 

Yugyeom widened his eyes as if asking you what to do, “don’t look at me!” 

“Is uh… someone there? Or… two someones?” The unknown voice called out into the stacks. The sound of the voice made you feel sick. You didn’t know how long they were there or how much they had heard and especially because you were 90% sure you knew the voice. 

When Yugyeom looked at you again with fear in his eyes, you realized the roles had been reversed once again and you were back to being the older, wiser one out of the two of you. This time however, his look to you for guidance didn’t annoy you as it had in the past. Instead, you felt your stomach flip and it go straight to your core. 

Your eyes wandered to the floor, where you see the piece of literature that fell and hit Yugyeom. Reaching down to grab it, you motioned for Yugyeom to crouch down with you, “okay, on the count of three, you’ll grab my backpack and I’m going to throw this the opposite way. They’ll probably hear it and go look where the noise came from. That’s when we’ll run towards the exit.” 

“Why do I have to carry your backpack?” Yugyeom whined. 

Rolling your eyes, you answered him, “because a gentleman always carries a lady’s things.” “You just want to be the one who throws the book.” 

You shrugged, pretending like he didn’t have you figured out already, “now come on,” both standing back up you nodded at him to signal the beginning of your countdown. 

“One…” you whispered, looking back at Yugyeom who licked his lips in anticipation, “two…” 

You paused hearing footsteps, “three!” you scream whispered at him as you threw the book in the opposite direction, in one of the book stacks, praying you don’t get seen. At the end of the countdown, Yugyeom grabbed your backpack and your free hand, both of you running towards the exit. 

You both practically stumbled down the stairs of the library, unable to contain your laughs as soon as you’re free and on the front steps outside. 

When finally caught your breath from the running and laughter, it dawned on you the events that had just taken place and what you actually just did in the library. “Holy shit… I can’t believe we actually did that. That was kinda fucked up wasn’t it? That we did that in there?”

“You said no one goes into the Medieval Lit section!” Yugyeom complained as soon as he’s caught his breath. 

You bit your lip and nervously looked at him, “Well for the most part no one really does! There’s only one person I know of that does…” 

“Who?” 

“Park Jinyoung.” 

He let out a snort, “I can’t believe you.” 

You shoved Yugyeom lightly, “It’s not like I knew he would show up!” At your words he pulled you towards him and close enough until his mouth brushed your ear, “I bet you wanted him to catch us. You dirty girl.” 

With widened eyes and once again turned on by none other than Kim Yugyeom you moved away from him gently and take his hand in yours, “come on.” 

“Where are we going?” He asked for the second time of the night.

“My place. I have something I want to show you,” You answered him, attempting to pull him forward again. “Oh and what’s that?” He had a smug smile on his face, clearly wanting to torture you. 

“Kim Yugyeom, I swear to God,” you wondered if he was really going to do this to you, “you better come with me so we can finish what we started or I’m starting a rumor about you.” 

He pulled your arm until you were back against him, your body flush with his front and you felt his hands go to your ass, “nah I know you wouldn’t do that.”

You pushed your hips against him and he let out a soft groan at the contact against him, his hardness being neglected this entire time, “try me.” 

He smirked at you, “fine… let’s go before I fuck you on the steps of the library. Then there’d be a rumor about both of us.” 

“If that happened that wouldn’t be a rumor. That would just be fact,” you explained to him, grabbing his hand again. 

“So that’s a yes?” 

You rolled your eyes at him and smiled. Kim Yugyeom was doing things to you and making you feel things that you couldn’t deny it any longer, “come on Yugyeom.” 

“Yes ma’am.”

[princessjungeun]

09: Ryujin x Reader

Request: hiiii!! i’d love to see girlfriend ryujin helping you when you’re injured, like if her baby broke her ankle or something🥺 thank youuuu💘

CW: hospitals, sports injury.

This is kind of an AU but also kind of not...just go with it 😌

The shouts of fans echoed throughout the stadium. Looking around you saw men, women, and children wearing your jersey number: 09. Although you weren’t the captain of your team, you were the star player and MVP. Often people compared you to some of the best soccer players in the world, men and women. You didn’t feel you measured up to them at all but everyone says otherwise, especially because you were on the U-21 women’s soccer team.

The sun hung high in the sky, beaming down creating the occasional heat wave. The very few clouds in the sky provided absolutely no shade, almost making it feel hotter. The grass was still slightly soggy from last nights storm, but the heat had long dried up most wet spots.

As you sprinted down the pitch you spotted a teammate in your peripheral vision. She dribbled the ball as fast as she could, trying to get away from the opposing team’s players.

“HEEJIN!” You shouted your teammate’s name signaling that you were open. The girl looked up and kicked the ball to you just before she was tripped by an opposing defender.

The ball was now at your feet, the other team’s defense following close behind. Breaking out into yet another sprint you headed closer to the goal. You passed the ball to another teammate of yours that was closer to the goal. Running faster you signaled you were open once again.

You watched as your teammates passed the ball from person to person in attempt to get it to you. Smiling widely, you watched Somi pass to her older sister Aisha, who passed to Yuna. The young blonde shouted your name before kicking the call full force to you.

With a smack the ball hit you in the chest, making you wince. It rolled down your body and your feet caught it. You ran closer to the goal before kicking the ball, watching as it flew into the back of the net.

Fans screamed your name, holding up jerseys with your name and number on the back. Flashing a smile to the camera you brushed a few hairs from your face.

Your eyes scanned the field looking for the ball before landing on your co captain Yves. The slim girl made her way gracefully down the pitch, nobody close enough to her to steal the ball.

You called out to her so she knew you were open. With one quick pass the ball was under your foot, finding another teammate you passed the ball. Right as you kicked the ball to Lalisa you felt yourself slip and fall on a damp patch of grass.

As your body made contract with the ground you felt a pain sear through your leg. A high pitched scream ripped through the stadium making everyone go silent.

The announcers voice broke the silence “Who is that? Number 09 is on the ground. L/N Y/N has fallen. She looks like she is in a lot of pain, as she is not moving. A teammate is by her side...and now a medic is being sent her way. Everyone standby.”

Laying on the ground you covered your face with your arm. Immediately you felt someone’s hand make contact with your face.

“Y/N? Can you hear me?” Heejin’s voice filled your ears, the only sound you could hear between your sobs.

A few medics ran onto the field asking the girls around you if they knew what happened. Heejin and Yves did their best to explain what they saw, but they didn’t exactly see how you fell.

A man asked you calmly “sweetheart does it feel like it’s the bone or a muscle? Is it both?” You could only nod, not knowing what you felt specifically, all you knew was that it hurt.

He once again asked “can you stand up?” You shook your head, letting out another sob.

The medics rolled you onto a stretcher before rolling you off the field. Heejin stood by you, walking with the medics. Your coach pulled her by the arm. “Heejin where do you think you’re going? We need you.” Pulling back she asked “can you sub Wonnie in? She hasn’t played today...trust me she can do it.” He gave in walking away calling to Wonyoung that she was to be subbed in.

Heejin asked you “is there anything I can do?” In a high pitched wheeze you let out “call R-Ryujin.”

You thought about your girlfriend hoping it would take away some of the pain. Remembering how she’d smile just by looking at you. The way the little dimples beneath her eyes would show up to complete the grin you put on her face.

Another wave of pain washed over you, erasing Ryujin from your thoughts completely. Feeling your mind go blank, your eyes rolled to the back of your head. Only seeing black as your body fell limp, the voices around you were only distant echos.

You were in and out of consciousness for what seemed like only five minutes. All you remember was Heejin standing over you before a medic put a mask over your face. A warmth engulfed your body and you felt something wrap around your arms and torso.

Thinking it was your girlfriend holding you, not a blanket and straps of the gurney holding you, you smiled weakly. Whispering softly you mumbled “Ryu-Ryujinnie?”

The idea of her with you faded as a loud wind filled your ears. So loud it completely drowned out everything else around you.

The last thing you heard was a female medic tell you “ok sweetheart just relax, we’re air.....hospital. Seoul-........everything’s oka-.” The words got more and more sporadic as you weaved in and out of consciousness. Eventually your mind completely going blank as you imagined being in your girlfriend’s arms as she kissed all your pain away.

•

•

•

It had been two days since the accident and you were just waking up. Looking around the room everything was white. Not a welcoming white either, it looked like that of a futuristic prison. The thick glass windows looked out only to a bare night sky. The smell of sanitizer filled your nostrils, almost making you sneeze. This smell only belonging to one place. A hospital.

As you moved your hand to rub your eye you saw the IV stuck to your skin. You poked at it with your free hand, wincing when it stung. The oxygen tube up your nose did nothing but make you uncomfortable so your tried to pull it out.

Tugging at the plastic tube you realized a nurse had small pieces of medical tape on each of your cheeks, holding the tube in place. Whimpering softly you continued to pull at it until a nurse came in with a smile.

“Oh you’re awake!” Her smile was welcoming and warm, making you relax. She reached out for the tube and said “here let me, I’ll give you the mask instead hmm?” You nodded nervously wondering why she was so happy at this hour of night.

“Wha-what happened?” You asked, your voice hoarse from not drinking for two days. The woman responded as she walked around the room “you tore a few things...I already paged someone to come and explain everything to you in the morning. But for now you should get back to sleep okay?” You nodded as she took your vitals quickly before placing an oxygen mask over your face. Before leaving she told you “when you wake up press the red button above your head, it’ll tell me you’re awake ok?” Nodding once again you tried your best to smile with the mask over your face.

Catching a glimpse of her name tag you made sure to engrave the name in your head:

Bae Joohyun

•

•

•

When you woke up the next day it was definitely early morning. The golden sun pooled through the windows, illuminating the room from a bland white, to a beautiful gold.

You pressed the nurse button above your head as Joohyun instructed you to the night before.

Almost immediately Joohyun came into your room, the same bright smile on her face. You asked “can I speak with the doctor?” She told you “he is with another patient but i’ve already paged him...but in the mean time you have a visitor. She’s actually come everyday since your arrival and stayed until I had to kick her out. Would you like to see her?”

Knowing it was either Ryujin or Heejin you nodded enthusiastically.

Just as you suspected it was Ryujin. Your girlfriend immediately came to your side. She stayed silent just happy that you had finally woken up after so long.

Soon a doctor came in, the anxiousness growing as you awaited to find out what happened while you were asleep.

“Miss L/N Y/N yes?” He asked looking at a clipboard in his hands. He continued “so Joohyun told me you asked about what happened hmm?” You nodded, your gaze alone pressing him to continue.

He flipped through some papers as he talked:

“When you fell at your game, you expierenced what we call a tear in your ACL as well as your MCL. Those were both third degree tear, which means a complete tear. You also dislocated your knee and fractured a few bones around your knee. We preformed a surgery to fix the torn ligaments, however the fractures will have to heal on their own. You will start physical therapy in two weeks. Until then you will need to be in a wheelchair, absolutely no weight is to be put on your leg, by any means okay?”

Nodding slowly you tried to show you understood despite the fact that you still hadn’t fully comprehended what he told you. He asked a few questions like how you were feeling and if you were in pain. To which you told him you were ok and your pain medication hadn’t worn off just yet. He nodded and left you and Ryujin alone.

The second the door closed you pulled the mask off your face and let all the tears you held in out. Ryujin pouted before scooting the chair she was in closer to your bed.

“Awww baby don’t cry it’ll be ok.” Your girlfriend cooed as she wipes away a few of your tears.

“No I won’t...You heard what he said Ryu. I completely tore my ACL and MCL. I’m never gonna play again....” Swatting her hand away you explained what you thought this meant for you.

Ryujin kissed your cheek softly, her thumb grazing your face. She carefully placed the mask back on and said “it’ll all work out baby ok? Just trust me.”

•

•

•

When you finally got released from the hospital you were so relieved. Although you were only there for 5 days, two of which you weren’t conscious for, it felt like an eternity.

Before leaving Joohyun and a few other nurses taught you how to do basic tasks alone. Like using the bathroom and taking a shower, as well as dressing yourself. Despite their help, you still needed assistance with the last one.

Luckily Ryujin was done with Itzy’s Not Shy comeback so she had a long break ahead, as the other two JYP girl groups were promoting for the next few months.

•

•

•

“Baby come on...you have physical therapy today.” Ryujin gently shook you awake, a smile on her face. You groaned softly just wanting to sleep longer but you knew she would find away to get you up. Your girlfriend helped you get dressed before making sure you ate breakfast and took your meds.

You’d been doing physical therapy for a little while now but today was the first time you were going to try and walk.

Ryujin would sense your nerves as she drove to the hospital. Her hand found your thigh, rubbing your skin reassuringly.

Without taking her eyes off the road she told you “Don’t be worried okay? Everything will be fine. And I’ll be with you the whole time.”

•

•

•

“Ok Y/N we can start whenever you’re ready. I want you to start with your good leg then take the next step with your other.” Your physical therapist Ashley stood behind you, holding you up by the waist. Her assistant stood in front of you, Ryujin at the end of the parallel bars.

You took a small step with your good leg before lifting your other leg. It felt like your bad leg weighed 200 pounds, as if you were trying to pull a heavy weight 100 yards. Taking the small step you felt yourself move slightly forward.

“Okay good, can you get another one?” She gently coaxed. You tried your best to take another step, the assistant in front of you ready to catch you if you fell.

By the end of the appointment you had taken five steps which was far more than you thought you could do. The only thing pressing you on was seeing Ryujin’s smile as she watched you proudly.

•

•

•

It had been three weeks since you took your first steps post surgery. You had improved fairly quickly, so much so Ashley had given you home workouts to do with Ryujin.

“Come on baby it’s fine take your time.” Ryujin told you as you firmly gripped onto her forearms for support. Taking slow steps across the floor you focused on maintaining your balance.

Right as you took your third step you felt yourself falling. Ryujin caught you almost instantly, not giving you time to even hit the ground.

Holding yourself up on her body, arms wrapped around her neck, you let out a few sobs. She scooped you up into her arms and carried you to your bed. Placing you down she climbed on next to you, allowing you to slip into her lap. You sobbed into her chest, tears running down your face and onto her shirt.

“Baby...it’s okay why are you crying? You did so well today.” Your girlfriend rubbed small circles on your back while running her other hand through your hair.

You let everything out in one breath “I feel so pathetic. I can’t do anything on my own anymore. It’s like I’m a child Ryu. It’s not that hard to take ten steps but I can’t fucking do it. This is so stupid...”

Ryujin pulled away her features softened, wiping a few more tears from your face.

“Baby don’t say that. That’s not true. You have come a long way these past few weeks and I won’t let you take that away from yourself. You couldn’t even stand up let alone walk not too long ago. Even Ashley says you’re improving faster than most. You completely tore a ligament on the front and inside of your knee. Plus a few broken bones. It’s not going to happen overnight my love. It’ll take time, you just need to be patient. There’s nothing you can’t do. So dry those beautiful eyes and we can try again hmm?”

You sighed realizing she was right, it wouldn’t happen overnight. “Ugh okay...fine.”

Ryujin smiled kissing you gently on the lips “that’s my girl.”

•

•

•

It had been 18 months since you last were on the soccer field. Ashley had cleared you at 11 months but you were still afraid of getting hurt again. You trained with your teammates since the 11th month marker, but you just hadn’t played.

Today was your first game in 18 months and you were beyond nervous. Pacing around the locker room you chewed your lip nervously.

“Y/N relax, you’ll be ok. The grass is completely dry, you’ve trained for this over the past 7 months. Everyone here is going to watch out for you, and Wonnie is going to be subbed in the second you give the signal okay?” Heejin held you by the shoulders as she talked to you.

Yves waved all of you all into a huddle, “Okay everyone, it’s Y/N’s first day back. I want you all to watch out for her. Yuna and Wonyoungie, don’t get distracted. Eyes on the game only ok? Lalisa and Heejin, keep each other in check. No slacking this game. And Wonnie stay warm for when you get subbed in okay?”

Before walking out Yves pulled you aside “I know you’ll do great, you always have since we were kids. But please don’t push yourself too hard. Wonyoung can be subbed in anytime. Just give the signal and i’ll make it happen. I’m proud of you Y/N, you’ve come a long way.” She hugged you before linking arms with you and walking out into the open stadium.

•

•

•

Ten minutes into the game and you felt good as ever. You wished you hadn’t been scared and played earlier because it felt so gold to be back out in front of everyone. Fans cheered your name even when you were just standing around.

You signaled for Wonyoung to be subbed in just so you could get a bit of a break. As you sat on the sidelines you searched the stadium the best you could. Even though you knew Ryujin had to work today, you hoped she was still in the crowd watching you.

For the second half you got subbed back in, taking Wonyoung’s place on the field. Eyes on the ball you ran around the pitch to find an open spot.

Yuna dribbled the ball halfways down the pitch before passing it off to Heejin. From there it was kicked to Lalisa who quickly passed to Aisha. The tall girl looked around frantically as she ran, panic settling on her face when she saw nobody from her team near her. The three defenders on her back weren’t helping her either. You called out “Aisha!” She kicked the ball to you, sighing of relief that she wasn’t going to lose the ball to the other team.

The crowd chanted your name as you made your way to the goal. Adrenaline coursing through your veins you ran faster than you ever had before. With all the force in your body, you kicked the ball towards the goal. The goalie missed catching it by at least a meter, as it whizzed past her and into the back of the net.

You realized you had scored the winning goal on your first game back. All of your teammates came to crowd around you. The fans in the stands roared, cheering your name and number. The announcer’s voice rang from above:

“L/N Y/N has scored the winning goal! Her first game since she suffered major knee injuries 18 months ago. She has shown us today that she is back and better than ever, congratulations to our star, 09!”

Smiling brightly as your teammates hugged you, showing you nothing but love, you thought it couldn’t get any better.

Heejin elbowed you lightly before pointing to the sidelines. Covering your eyes from the sun you squinted, breaking into a spring when you saw a familiar face.

Jumping onto her and wrapping your legs around her waist, you tucked your head into your girlfriend’s neck.

“I thought you were working today!” You hopped off of her, hugging her again. She held you tight before saying “I couldn’t miss my baby girl’s first day back.” You pulled her in for a kiss and asked “so...what’d you think from the audience perspective?”

Ryujin smiled, her eye dimples showing through “you looked amazing baby. I’m so proud of you. See I told you there’s nothing you can’t do.”

[fandom-blackhole]

Hayloft- Ezra x Reader P.4

AN: Part 4 is here!! This week has been hectic, again, so I am sorry that the headcannons never got published, but they will at some point! Anyway I hope you enjoy!!

PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS

Masterlist

Words: 3.1k

Warnings: AFAB reader, descriptions of depression, mentions of death, ATTEMPTED ASSAULT, slight nudity, cleaning (bc cleaning sucks)

The days and weeks following the night in the spare bedroom of the house just passed in a numb blur. Everything had happened that night so quickly that I hadn’t really processed what all had actually gone down in that tiny room until about days later. The first three days I couldn’t tell you anything that had happened, I had purely just been moving on auto-pilot stuck in my head; one thing that I could tell you though is that I didn’t once step out of the house, and barely left my room. My father refused to look at me for at least a week, let alone talk to me in any way. Mealtimes were tense and full of food that just didn’t carry any flavor any more. A few times Anthony had tried to talk to me, but for every word, he said I could only see his mouth moving and for every glance, I gave him only made me see and think of Joshua. Anthony for all his faults knew that I was suffering and he was trying to bring me back from the numb state that I seemed to be stuck in. He started making small comments about something Ezra had said to him during the day’s work after offering to help with the dishes or he would occasionally walk into the house for glasses of water for him, dad, and Ezra and would motion out the window where I would find Ezra himself standing just far enough away that he could meet my eyes and give me a small smile. Anthony even allowed me to make the plates that he took out to the barn for Ezra, and upon returning with the empty plate he would quote Ezra’s praise for the food with an eye roll, trying to act like he didn’t care or was annoyed; he always failed. Though, because he never failed to bring a small smile to my face, which in turn caused him to smile, and for a moment things would feel ok, but it never lasted long.

---------------------------------------------------------------

After that first week of being away from Ezra, I couldn’t take it anymore and I snuck into the spare room and sat on the cot he had been using, my legs crossed and my hands in my lap picking at the skin surrounding my nails. As I sat there I took in the room before me, I couldn’t stop the tears that fell down my cheeks in what seemed to be an endless river. Nothing in the room was out of place, everything where it had originally been placed, and all the cots were made. The room looked as if Ezra had not even been here and that only served to make me cry harder, but as I looked down and moved one of my hands to muffle a sob I noticed something small on the floor that was out of place and didn’t belong. Standing up slowly, I wrapped my arms around my middle as I slowly made my way over to the small sprig that laid on the floor. As I knelt to pick it up I knew instantly that it was part of the handful of flowers that Ezra had pressed into the pages of my copy of Pride and Prejudice. The flowers’ small puffy round white and purple petals still as vibrant and fragrant as the day they had fallen into my lap. 

Feeling my legs start to get wobbly from the emotions the small flowers had pushed over me, I clutched the small branch of dried petals and walked back to Ezra’s old cot, this time laying down with the tears freely flowing down my cheeks. Curling into myself, I held the fragile flowers perhaps too roughly to my chest, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. 

Eventually, my crying slowed to a stop. Exhausted I couldn’t bring myself to move, more than to pull the blanket over me and bury my head in a pillow that still faintly smelled like Ezra. That night I fell asleep on the small uncomfortable cot still clutching the flowers to my chest and wishing that Ezra’s scent that still clung to the blanket and pillow was stronger, or that the man himself was there to hold me and whisper into my ear lovingly in his sweet lilting accent. 

As I slept, for the first time in the week I had not been near the man my heart longed for, I was able to actually sleep peacefully, without waking several times aching for the man I couldn’t reach.

---------------------------------------------------------------

After that first night that I had fallen asleep in the spare room on Ezra’s old cot, I couldn’t help myself but continue to sneak into the room every few days, each time falling asleep on the same cot. The pillow and blanket had lost Ezra’s scent after a couple of weeks of me sleeping there, instead taking on my own scent. Even though all traces of him were missing from the room, I couldn’t help but to continue to sneak into the room. 

After his scent had faded from the blanket, I found myself wrapping myself in the blanket anyway and looking out the window he had often looked out of. Instead of looking to the stars as he often had done, I watched the barn, or more specifically the hayloft where I knew he to be resting. Each night I watched and I not once seen so much as a flicker of movement or light, but the thought that he was close by brought me a little comfort, even if it was shortly washed away by the melancholy of the knowledge that I could not go to him. I found myself, as I watched the hayloft for any sign of Ezra, nervously chewing on my bottom lip to the point that  I tasted the coppery coiling taste of my own blood on my tongue.

---------------------------------------------------------------

My father’s plan of keeping me just doing housework and my weekly Saturday town visits didn’t last very long. In fact, it only lasted roughly three weeks before he needed the extra set of hands, and much to his dismay he allowed me out of the house. He still found ways to keep Ezra and I from crossing paths as we worked, always sending one of us to do work away from the other, and always trying to keep me working within eyesight of himself. 

Being outside again felt lovely. I hadn’t realized just how much I missed doing work in the field until I had stopped completely. And even though I wasn’t out in the field with Anthony, my father, and Ezra often, I still enjoyed when it was necessary, because it meant that I was closer to Ezra again after weeks apart. It seemed as if things had completely restarted to the way they were going before I left the note for Ezra to find that first night. Though things seemed to have progressed even further back than that, at least before there had been small talk and small touches. Now we were only able to share short meaningful glances at the other, and only heard the other’s voice as we spoke to anyone but each other. At this point, I ached to be held by Ezra and feel his calloused fingers tracing my arm again, and from the glances, he sent my way I could only imagine he felt similar, though neither one of us seemed ready to make any moves that might cause us to be separated completely again.  

Roughly two months out from harvest time, my father decided that we needed another pair of hands since he had limited my work. As a solution, he had gone to Mrs. Robertson and asked to borrow her eldest son, Tucker, the son she and my father had been trying to set up with me for the last year and a half with no success. Tucker was a hard worker and was a nice enough guy, but he had a tendency to make me uncomfortable and he always was trying different ways to get the two of us alone. My father and Mrs. Robertson seemed to both believe that Tucker was just taken with me, but I wasn’t convinced from the interactions we had had. 

The first few days of Tucker being on the farm were calm and moved slowly. When working together with him I always kept up my guard and only spoke with him when necessary and keeping my words short and to the point. Tucker stayed civil and for once didn’t seem to be pushing to get me alone, and I thought that he was finally starting to realize that I wasn’t interested in him. As my guard started to come down, I started to notice that Ezra tended to glance in my direction more now that Tucker was there, almost like he was checking on me, scared that when he wasn’t watching Tucker would take me away. Each time I caught Ezra’s eyes as he looked over at me I started to send him small smiles that I could only hope to express my love for him and not Tucker. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

Things were slow and anticlimatic the first week with Tucker, even with Ezra’s tense glances in my direction every time I had to work with him. As the next week rolled around things started much the same as the previous week. But, as seemed to be the new pattern in my life, as I was finally getting back into the groove of things, even without Ezra’s closeness, things went downhill, and quickly.

It was halfway through the week and not much needed to be done with the harvest, so my father had sent me to the barn to do some light cleaning and sorting. The barn, which hadn’t really been cleaned in over a year, needed more than the light cleaning that he had told me to do which caused me to sigh loudly, but there was nothing to do but this so I just got to work. We had never really had animals on our farm besides a clutch of chickens at one point so there weren’t any animals to clean up after, only old tools that need to be cleaned and sorted. I had decided early into the process to start at the back of the barn and make my way to the front as I worked. If I did things right, cleaning the barn would take all day to finish, but I wasn’t going to complain if it meant that I could work alone, away from Tucker and my father, for the first time in days. 

Moving quickly, I was almost halfway through the sorting through the tools scattered around the barn when I heard footsteps outside of the entrance to the barn. I didn’t pay much attention to them, figuring my father had sent Anthony for water for the four of them working in the field. Humming I bent over to pick up a wrench to throw into the toolbox a few feet away, I felt someone grab me from behind. I could only gasp in surprise as I was pushed completely into the dirt floor of the barn, the wrench still in my hand, though it was ripped from my grasp before I could realize what was happening. Shortly after I heard the wrench being thrown away from my reach, I felt someone’s breath on the back of my neck one of their hands held the back of my head, keeping my face in the dirt and the other gripping my waist harshly. As soon as I got over my initial surprise I started to try and fight back, squirming as much as I could in the person’s grasp only to have them lift my head up by my hair and then slam it into the dirt hard enough for me to see stars, but not enough to really hurt me or knock me unconscious. After the person slammed my head down the finally spoke up, though it was hardly above a whisper as they breathed out my name into my ear, “Hush now, we don’t want dear old daddy to come running and find you like this now do we?”

As the person spoke I couldn’t do anything but whimper and close my hands into fists as I realized just who had me pinned. Tucker. I couldn’t say I was surprised by any means, but that didn’t change the fact that I was scared out of my mind, and mentally berating myself for letting my guard down enough that he was able to pin me down before I could so much as react. He whispered my name into my ear again before pulling back and speaking a little louder, “Now this is how this is gonna go sweet cheeks. I have been trying to get you alone for what feels like an eternity, but you have always managed to escape me every time, but not this time. No, this time I have you, and you’re going to do everything I say. Now first things first I want you to flip over and take that shirt you’re wearing off, and then we’ll work on getting that fabric off your pretty little bottom.”

As he spoke Tucker flipped me over so that I could see his sick smirk and lustful eyes looking down at me. Disgusted, I went to reach up and claw at his face with my nails, but it was like he had expected it so before my hands had come anywhere near him, he used the hand that wasn’t clutching the bottom of my shirt to smack me across the cheek, hard enough that it sure was going to leave a mark and the sound had echoed around the barn. I felt tears start to stream down my face as he ripped off my shirt far from gently before one of his hands moved to pin both of my hands above my head and the other moved to grope my breast roughly over my bra. Crying now to the point that I was hiccupping and sobbing, he moved his hand down towards my bottoms before harshly whispering, “If you don’t shut that pretty little mouth up, I’ll do it for you, now stop it.”

I felt helpless as I tried to struggle against him and get free, or at least stop his assault, but that only caused him to grip my wrists tighter to the point where his nails were digging into my skin, which caused me to whimper loudly and ask him to stop through choke out sobs. As I got louder he quickly moved his hand from my waistband to clutch harshly at my neck, “I said be quiet you little fucking slut.”

Gasping harshly for air, I noticed a shadow quietly approaching where I had been pinned to the floor, and right as I felt that I was going to pass out from lack of oxygen I felt Tucker being dragged off of me. At that point, I didn’t care who my rescuer was, as I rolled onto my side and gasped for air as spots danced in my eyes and my ears were ringing. It took me a few seconds but I was able to regain my breath and glance over to where the person who had saved me had pinned Tucker to the floor of the barn and was from the looks of it beating him to a pulp. Once my hearing came back I was also able to make out low mutterings and curses every few words. As I crawled closer I started to recognize the man, whose back was to me. 

I watched stunned for a few seconds, tears still falling down my cheeks, as Ezra’s arm kept swing at Tucker’s face, even after he had gone limp. After shaking off the shock I finally crawled over close enough that I could place my hand on Ezra’s shoulder and hoarsely whispered, “Ez, please stop, you’re going to kill him...”

Ezra, for all the brutality, that he had just shown, turned his head gently and looked into my eyes softly as he touched his forehead to mine, even as he still knelt of Tucker’s unconscious body, “My beautiful sweet flower, he deserves to be taken away from this mortal realm if he thought for even a second to harm your graceful beauty if he thought that he could touch you even as you cried and struggled against him. No, my precious flower, he needs to pay.”

Ezra after saying those words went to turn back to Tucker, but I placed my hand on his cheek before his head could even more away from mine and whispered out his name softly as new tears sprung to my eyes, “Please...don’t do this, just….just…”

“Just what flower? Ask and I will do it for you. Anything for you,” Ezra’s eyes met mine with a new intensity as he spoke. Fully crying now and not trusting my voice I just wrapped my arms around him and pulled him away from Tucker to the corner of the barn a few feet away. Ezra, the smart man that he is, instantly picked up on what I wanted, and even though he still seemed to be thrumming with anger and adrenalin, he pulled me the rest of the way into the corner where he allowed me to curl up into his lap as he stroked my hair with his bloody hand and whispered loving to me. We sat there like that for a few minutes before I finally calmed down and looked up at him. It was obvious now that as Ezra had been in a blind rage Tucker had managed to fight back, at least a little, as a purple bruise was starting to form on the underside of his chin, and his shirt was torn in some places. Softly brushing my fingers over the new bruise I followed it with a kiss and a watery smile as I whispered, “I never thought I would have my own knight in shining armor…”

Laughing soft Ezra shook his head and placed his forehead against mine once again, “Oh flower, I am anything but a knight in shining armor. I am far from the virtuous men who did nothing but good for the ones they loved and their kings. While they had a code and rules they still followed, I would throw every last one of my morals, or what is left of them, if it meant that you were safe and unharmed. I am sorry delicate flower that I was not here to stop him sooner….”

(As always thank you for reading, and any and all likes, reblogs, and comments are really appreciated! If you would like to be added to the taglist let me know! If I have this planned correctly there will be two more parts, and possibly some short side stories I might add! Anyway have a lovely week end!)

Tags: @babybelou​ @farrvey​ @anatanotegami​ @revolution-starter​​ @cadelinhadopedropascal​​ @lucifurrr​ @coolfishoperatoreagle​

[twomoonstwosuns]

cold.

back to you [series masterlist]

previous part · next part 

pairing: professor!poe dameron x reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, things are getting a bit angsty

word count: 2.8k

a/n: an actual chapter without smut? i’m shocked. don’t worry, it’ll be back. in the mean time enjoy something that’s supposed to hurt a little bit. feedback is always appreciated!

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“I’m just saying, if they’re not going to salt the sidewalks, they should put all classes online. I can’t be the only one who’s tired of almost dying on my way to class. It’s a lawsuit waiting to happen.”

Kaydel always had something to complain about. Whether it was the weather or a certain person, there was always something. You had to agree with her on this, though. The semester had just started and the both of you had nearly wiped out on the slippery sidewalks. Twice.

The warmth of the building engulfed you like a warm blanket. At least they were keeping the buildings comfortable so you wouldn’t be shivering all through class. Walking into your classroom, you scanned the seats and found one of your friends sitting in the middle of the room. Only you hadn’t exactly expected to see him.

“Snap Wexley, on time to class. I never thought I’d see the day.”

You’d met Snap your freshman year. He lived on the same floor as you and your freshman roommate Karé and they started dating soon after. Between that and the close proximity of your dorm rooms, not to mention the shared secrecy of sneaking alcohol in, you became close friends.

“Well, we’re graduating in a few months, thought I’d make an effort as my parting gift.” He said as you settled into the seat next to him, removing your winter layers. “So…”

Snap was looking at you expectantly. You gave him a look back.

“My break was great, thanks for asking.” You said. “No, I didn’t forget.”

Snap smiled victoriously while Kaydel just looked confused.

“My mom made cookies for me to bring back for Snap.” You explained before turning back to Snap. “They’re at my apartment. Not only did she make you some, she made you a whole plate and I have to call her and have you tell her that you got them.”

“Tell your mom I love her.”

“Tell her yourself.”

“How does Snap know your mom?” Kaydel asked.

“Both his and Karé’sparents couldn’t come to parents weekend freshman year so my mom ‘adopted’ them for the day and they bonded. Now he’s like the son she never had. She dotes on him. And my sister’s husband Chris. My mom always wanted a son and got two girls instead.”

“So, if you don’t get married…”

“Then Snap and Karéget my place at the dinner table.”

“Your mom is definitely invited to me and Karé’s wedding.” Both your and Kaydel’s eyes widened at the insinuation and you stared at Snap with open mouths. He spoke before you could. “I haven’t proposed. Yet. I’m just saying.”

You shook your head in disbelief.

“You jackass.” You muttered, hitting his shoulder. “I can’t believe you made me think that—“

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen…”

Your head snapped to the front of the room at the familiar voice. There was Poe, setting his brown leather bag next to the desk. Your pulse quickened and you stole a look from Kaydel, wondering if you had somehow misread your schedule and ended up in the wrong classroom.

“For those who haven’t had my class before, I’m Professor Dameron. I know this is supposed to be Professor D’Acy’s class, but she’s been ordered to be on bed rest until her due date in April, so I’ll be taking her class this semester.”

You gulped, anxiety creeping in. You were not prepared to see him today. How were you going to be able to sit there and concentrate when his mouth had done so many different and pleasurable things to you just two days ago?

“Y/N, you good?” Kaydel was looking at you questioningly and you realized you had been caught staring at Poe. He had removed his own coat and was looking waytoo good wearing a button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up and the top two buttons undone. You were convinced the universe was out to get you.

“Yeah…” Not even you were convinced. You dragged it out as long as you could without raising suspicion as you gathered your thoughts. “Sorry, I’m a little surprised. D’Acy’s my advisor, I was just talking to her the other day and she seemed fine. I hope everything’s ok.”

“I’m sure it’s precautionary.” Snap interjected.

“Agreed, better safe than sorry.” Kaydel said. “I’ve heard Dameron’s a great teacher though. Plus, he’s gonna be really nice to look at for the next four months.”

You nodded slowly in agreement. She and every other female would probably be ogling him, so you’d blend right in. In a weird way, it was a reassuring thought. Poe took a pile of papers from his bag and handed them to the front row, having them pass them down to every student. He then brought out the class list and started taking attendance, seeing some familiar faces from the previous semester. He already knew their preferred nicknames and made small talk with them as he marked them in attendance. It made you smile. Poe really did make an effort to have a friendly banter with his students. It was just one of the many reasons why he was one of the most popular teachers on campus.

“Kaydel Connix.”

Kaydel voiced her presence and Poe looked up to put a face to her name. That was when he took notice of you. You had busied yourself with trying to get your pen to work to avoid catching his eye, unsure of how you’d react, but you could very briefly feel his eyes rake over you. He continued down the list and you felt on edge as he neared the first letter of your last name.

“Y/N Y/L/N, I know I saw you here.”

You waved your hand and Poe caught your eye, giving you a soft smile.

“Nice to see you again,” he said as he marked your attendance. You returned the smile.

“You too, sir.”

You mentally slapped yourself for calling him ‘sir’ in a room full of people, the heat of embarrassment beginning to cover your cheeks. Then you saw his shoulders tense and curiosity got the best of you. You wondered, based on his reaction, if there was a kink you didn’t know about, and the thought of it made you bite the inside of your cheek to keep from giggling. Poe managed to hide his reaction well as he continued with attendance and you blew out a sigh of sweet relief.

“You’ve had his class before?” Kaydel whispered. You nodded as you took one of his syllabi. “So is it true, is he a really good teacher?”

He’s good at more than just teaching, you thought as you assured her. When Poe was done taking attendance, he dived into going over the syllabus. It was tedious, and he told the class as such, but necessary seeing as this wasn’t even supposed to be his class. He went through it page by page, answering questions along the way and giving details about certain assignments and days when you wouldn’t have class.

Poe dismissed the class after the hour and a half was up. You followed Kaydel and Snap out but lingered, deciding at the last minute to see if you could get a minute with him. Kaydel noticed you weren’t right behind her and gave you a questioning look.

“You go ahead,” you said loud enough for Poe to hear. “I have to ask Professor Dameron about getting ahold of one of my assignments for my portfolio. I’ll see you later.”

She nodded and left and you turned towards Poe, carefully approaching his desk.

“Question for you.”

“Answer.”

Poe watched the last student walk out the door before turning to give you his full attention. He leaned against the desk, folding his arms across his chest and exhaling quietly.

“Is this going to make things weird?” You dropped your voice to a quieter octave in case anyone came back in. “I mean, this has been working really well and I think part of that is because we didn’t see each other much in public.”

“I don’t think so. Not if we make it weird.” You were still hesitant and Poe sensed it. “Was I surprised to see you today? Yeah. Did I have to remind myself to not stare too long at you? Definitely, but I think going forward it’ll be ok because I won’t be caught off-guard seeing your gorgeous face every other day.”

You weren’t sure if he meant to call you gorgeous out loud. Pet names other than what came out in the heat of the moment was an unspoken agreement to be off-limits. Regardless, you couldn’t help the way the corners of your mouth began to turn up.

“So, you don’t want to stop?” The question was out of your mouth before you could stop it. Of course you didn’t want to stop sleeping with him, but maybe this was a sign. Since Thanksgiving break, there were more stolen glances and subtle touches anytime you “casually” ran into him in a setting that allowed a closer proximity.

“Of course not.” Poe answered without hesitation. Your shoulders relaxed with his reassurance. “Do you?”

“Not at all.”

“Then we won’t make it weird.” Poe said softly. You nodded. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m really happy I get to see you more, even if it’s just across a classroom.”

You felt your cheeks heat up. Despite your relationship being strictly physical, Poe always found little ways to make your heart beat just a little bit quicker.

“Me too.”

“You’ll just have to make sure you’re not thinking too much about what we’ve been doing.” You rolled your eyes as he chuckled. “Hey, I saw you staring earlier.”

“I know how good your mouth is.” You said. “And even if I do get caught, at least I won’t be the only female in the room thinking about you.”

Your teasing tone made him blush and an easy smile started to form on his face. While he was only crude while talking to you, Poe was actually an extremely modest person. Confident, but humble.

“Does this mean you’re taking over as my advisor as well?”

“Only if you want.” Poe said, rounding the corner of the desk to start packing things up. “D’Acy told me she’ll be reaching out to her advisees via email about the semester, but with nothing to do on bed rest I’m sure she’d be more than happy to stay on as your advisor. Her words, not mine.”

“I may take you up on that. I’ve got some pretty heavy classes this semester since it’s my last one. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to have the expertise of twogreat professors. If you don’t mind, of course.”

“I don’t mind at all.”

“Cool,” you said, giving him an appreciative smile as you fidgeted with the strap of your backpack. “I have a class soon, but I’ll let you know what D’Acy says.”

Poe nodded as you walked away. Relief flooded your body at how that conversation played out. You felt that maybe you could make it through this semester. You had almost made it to the door when he spoke again.

“Oh, and Y/N?”

Poe beckoned you back over with his finger. He looked up at you from under his lashes and you could see how dark his eyes had gotten, leaning forward onto the desk when you were back to standing in front of it.

“Call me ‘sir’ one more time and I’ll have no choice but to bend you over this desk and take you right here.”

His voice was quiet and rough; it was exactly the tone of voice he knew turned you on. Anyone who could see you now would catch on pretty quick that there was something between the two of you. You took a daring step forward, placing your hand next to his on the desk, your fingers just barely touching his but the electricity crackling between you.

“Tempting.” You glanced behind you, seeing two students walking in. Luckily, they were caught up in their own conversation so they didn’t see how close you were to Poe. You pulled your hand away and backed away from the desk. “We’ll make it happen.”

You shot him a wink and he gave you a public-approved tight-lipped smile, though his eyes shined with mischief. The ghost of a smile was still on your face when you approached the door of the building.

“Y/N.”

You stopped in your tracks, the smile disappearing from your face as another familiar voice stopped you. You looked behind you and saw the last person you expected to see; your father. Your brow furrowed in confusion and you whatever good mood you were in after leaving Poe’s class vanished instantly.

“What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering my calls.” He spoke softly, as if he were comforting you.

“That should’ve been a hint that I don’t want to talk to you.” You spat. “What do you want?”

“To talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about. You left. That itself was a pretty clear message.”

“I want to explain.”

“I’m really not interested in hearing whatever bullshit excuse you’ve come up with about you and mom ‘growing apart’ or whatever. Besides, I have to go to class.”

“Then I’ll wait and we’ll get dinner. You owe me that much.”

You had started to turn away, but those five words made you whip around, anger flashing across your face. You approached him, standing face to face with your father. Your tone was laced with venom.

“I owe you? I don’t owe you anything. You broke our hearts. You left without an explanation and mom, Tallie, and I were left behind wondering why. And for what? The secretary you were banging? We blamed ourselves for weeks when we found out. So no, I don’t owe you a damn thing. In fact, the only thing owed is the respect of not making me stand here and listen to your excuse.”

“Honey, I’m sorry—“

“I don’t want to hear it.” Your voice started to shake and you willed yourself to keep it together, especially because people were staring as they passed. “I don’t want to talk to you. I don’t want to see you. Stop trying and leave me alone.”

Your father grabbed your forearm as you made to walk away for the final time.

“Let go of me.”

“Y/N, please—“

“Is everything ok?”

You didn’t even acknowledge Poe stepping up to you, so you didn’t see the concern evident on his face. You kept your eyes locked on your father, trying like hell to convey every message of resentment and sorrow you were feeling.

“Y/N?”

It was a stand-down to see who would budge first. No words were spoken. Your father’s eyes were pleading and yours were cold, emotionless with a fiery wrath burning behind them.

“Everything’s fine,” you said coldly, yanking your arm out of your father’s grip. “I have to get to class.”

You turned your back on the tow men, walking swiftly out of the building. Anger consumed you. You stopped where the sidewalk divided and, in a split second decision, went left and headed towards your apartment instead of going to class.

How dare he? You hadn’t heard much from your father since he walked out on your family and then had the audacity to come to your school and let himself explain as if you owed him that much. A million different thoughts ran through your head, all coming back to why. Why did he think he could win your forgiveness back after one dinner? It was then you realized that he never actually apologized.

Your hands were shaking so much that it took you three tries to get your key into the lock of your apartment door. You stepped inside and slammed the door shut, the sound echoing through the empty apartment. Your backpack fell to the floor and you didn’t bother to take your snow-covered coat off. You sunk down onto the living room couch, your chest constricting and your breathing become increasingly fast.

You wanted to just be angry. You wanted to yell and throw things and then be done with it, done with him. But you weren’t just angry.

You choked out a sob and dropped your head into your hands, the hurt still as raw as it was six months ago.

tag list [open!] - @ah-callie

[bugoverlord]

5 times kuroo couldn’t help kenma, and one where he didn't need to///kuroken

1-

Kenma falls to the ground. His wobbly legs give out after running so far and fast. He breathes heavy as he collects himself again. He looks behind him quickly to find that he was not being chased anymore. 

He hates the other kids. He hates how they don’t like him or his hair or his shyness. He wishes that they would just leave him alone for once instead of harassing him every chance they get. 

Kenma is nine years old and in the second grade when the other kids decide to start trying to get Kenma to open up in the worst way possible. First it started with fake-but-polite smiles in his direction during lunch, but when they realized he wasn’t going to smile back or even look them in the eye, they got mean. They tripped him and pushed him. They would yell and make fun of his hair and voice and clothes. 

Thats why he found himself on the sidewalk, blocks away from school after trying and succeeding to outrun the bullies.

His eyes tear up and his throat heaves a dry sob. He started crying even more when he realizes in the midst of running away, that he forgot his backpack. He knew that his mom would get mad and he knew that if he went back to get it, he would just get hurt even more. So, he stayed on the sidewalk helpless crying at his scraped knee and hurt feelings.

He hears a quiet “Kenma!”, coming from behind him. He sees Kuroo, his best friend and the only person that has ever decided to stay with him voluntarily. He has a concerned look on his face as he draws nearer. 

“Kenma.. did the other kids hurt you again?” He asks.

Kenma nods shakily, trying to get up from the ground. 

Kuroo frowns and shakes his head, obviously angry.

“Well, I knew that you had gone somewhere because when I went to your class after school today you weren’t there but your bag was, and I knew you would never leave your bag unattended with your PSP inside so I went and tried to find you, but you weren't anywhere on school property and I got scared so I ran out of school and-” Kuroo says, his words slightly slurring together as he tries to say all of it in only a few breaths. 

“I’m ok.” Kenma says and interrupts Kuroo. His words are slightly wavering but he puts on a brave face and reaches for his bag from Kuroo's hands. Once he has the bag in his hand he just reaches inside and pulls out his PSP and turns it on. He’s already turned around when he says “Let’s just go home.” and starts walking.

2- (S*LF H*RM TW)

Kenma is on his bed playing a video game when Kuroo bursts through the door. 

“Hey Kenma! I brought Mario Kart!” 

Kenma smiles slightly and scoots to the side on his bed, a clear invitation to have Kuroo sit beside him. Kuroo sits down and sets up the game for two players. Kenma quickly pulls his long sleeves back down his arms when Kuroo isn’t looking, and saves and shuts down the hand-held game he was playing. 

He returns his attention back on Mario Kart as he gets ready to play the game. 

They play about ten rounds before Kuroo decides he’s had enough of being beaten by Kenma. “This isn’t fair! You know everything about this game! How the hell am I supposed to beat that?” 

Kenma grins wolfishly before setting the controller down and shutting the game off for both of them. While he does this, he says “It’s not my fault you’re terrible at video games.” Kuroo gasps, offended and punches Kenma in the arm.

They both laugh and pull out their homework that they got during the day. Kenma is currently in his second year of middle school, while Kuroo is in his third. 

They work silently, only making noise when asking about a question or complaining about the amount of work the have each been given.

Kenma huffs. He doesn't get this assignment at all. 

“Hey kuro, can you help me?”

Kuroo turns towards Kenma and looks at the page that Kenma has laid in front of him.

“Oh! I remember doing this! So basically..” Kuroo starts but he trails off as he looks at Kenma.

Specifically his arms.

When Kenma realizes this his face turns red and he pulls down his sleeves quickly. He must’ve pulled them up subconsciously while focusing on his work.

“Actually I’m okay I can do it later.” Kenma tries to grab the paper from where Kuroo has placed it under his hands but Kuroo won’t let him.

“Kenma.. where did those cuts come from?” Kenma freezes and doesn’t respond. How could he respond to something like that without being suspicious?

“Kenma. Give me your arm.” Kuroo says, and Kenma can tell that this isn’t a request.

He shakes his head and tucks his arms to his chest, trying to fold into himself so he won’t have to deal with Kuroo’s questions.

“Kenma.” Kuroo says as he grabs at Kenma’s tucked away arms. Kuroo struggles a bit before he latches onto Kenma’s left arm and pulls up the sleeve.

Along Kenma’s forearm are horizontal cuts that are littered everywhere from his wrists to the fold of his elbow. Some clearly new and some light pink and old.

Kenma tries to pull back his arm but Kuroo’s grip won’t let up.

“Did you do this to yourself?” Kuroo asks, concerned. After a few seconds of hesitation Kenma nods slowly. 

Kuroo’s expression turns into horror as he stares back down at Kenma’s cuts. 

“Why?” 

“It just got too much and I didn’t know what to do,” Kenma starts, his face scrunching up tightly while tears start to stream down his face. His breathing gets harsher but he continues, “I’m sorry I won’t do it again, I promise. Please let go Kuroo. I didn’t mean to I promise, It just got to much and I didn’t know how to deal with it I’m sorry-”

Kuroo lets his grip loosen but as soon as Kenma pulls his arm back he throws his arms around the setter. 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you Kenma. I love you so much please stop doing this to yourself. I don’t know what I would do if you were gone, Kenma. Please promise me that you won’t do this again.” Kuroo says, his words muffled in Kenma's neck. 

Kenma can feel Kuroo’s tears on his skin so he puts his arms around Kuro, trying to comfort the other boy more than himself.

“I promise. I love you too.”

3-

Kenma picks up another ball and puts it on top of the pile in his arms. 

“Kozume-kun! Pick up the rest of the balls in the gym for your Senpais!” One of the third years of Nekoma high shouts at him.

This surprises him so much that he drops the three balls that were balancing in his arms. He frowns when he hears laughing coming from behind him.

He starts to pick the balls back up but he pauses when he hears whispers.

“God, look at him, he’s so pathetic.”

“He’s so easy to push around, I wonder why the rooster-head doesn’t use that to his advantage.” “It’s probably because he takes pity on him, I mean, look at the kid! He looks scared of his own shadow.”

His eyes fill with tears and he stubbornly blinks them away and continues to pick up the rest of the balls on the gym floor. Once he puts all of them back into the basket and gets ready to leave, another third year shouts at him again. 

“Oh, Kozume-kun, I forgot to tell you, it’s our turn to mop the floor tonight!” 

The group of third years leave after that, and Kenma breaths in harshly before mumbling under his breath “yeah, just like it was yesterday and the day before,,,”

He goes to the supply closet and brings out the floor cleaner. As he starts mopping up the floor, he hears shoes squeaking near the door. When he turns to look however, he sees Kuro standing there instead of the third year bully he expected.

Kuroo frowns when he sees what Kenma is doing and walks over to him. He takes the mop from his hand and drags the cleaning supplies back into the supply closet.

“You know you could say no to the third-years once in a while.” Kuroo says.

“We both know that they wouldn’t let me out of the work no matter how many times I say no. And even if they did, they would get back at me for it, later.” Kenma says softly, looking down at his shoes.

“You should have told me.”

“Told you what? That the third years are making me do some extra cleaning? That they’re making me run more than the others? What good would that do? It wouldn’t change how they treat me and you know it.” 

Kuroo sighs and brings his arms up and around Kenma’s shoulders.

“I just wish I could do something. I wish they would leave you alone so you can really enjoy volleyball this year.” Kuroo says nuzzling the top of Kenma's head.

“yeah.” Kenma quietly agrees. 

Kuroo pulls back from the hug and looks at Kenma's face. He leans down a few inches, and plants his mouth on Kenma’s. It lingers for a few second before he pulls away and pulls Kenma back into his arms. This isn’t a new experience for either of them. They have been sharing kisses since the year prior when they both admitted that they had feelings for each other.

They stand there hugging in the gym until a teacher comes into the gym and yells at them for staying too late into the night.

4-

Kenma is sitting in the corner of his room at ‘his’ 17th birthday party. 

It doesn’t feel like his, it feels like an excuse for his parents to invite family and family friends to their house. 

His eyes prickle with tears and he covers his mouth as the sobs start pouring out of him. He can’t control them anymore. The people here and the loudness of everything is getting to him.

He can feel his breathing growing ragged as he tries to control his panic, but knowing that there are at least 20 people in his house mingling right now fills him with unexplainable dread and anxiety.

the only person that he actually wanted here was Kuroo, and he is here, but he got dragged away by Kenma’s parents as soon as he stepped through the door and Kenma hasn’t see him since.

While he’s trying to calm himself down he doesn’t hear the door to his bedroom open and close softly. 

When he’s finally noticed the legs in front of him and looks up, he sees Kuroo with a sad smile on his face looking down at him.

“Hey kitten. Happy birthday. I’m sorry I didn’t say that earlier but you know how your parents are.” Kuro puts his hand out for Kenma and Kenma gratefully takes it. Kuroo pulls both of them onto the bed, and guides Kenma down to his chest.

“I’m sorry that you aren’t enjoying yourself, babe. I wish I could kick all of the people out and just kiss you senseless for a while.” Kuroo says, rubbing hand up and down Kenma’s back.

Kenma nods against his chest and closes his eyes. His breathing has evened out again and the tears eventually stop coming. Even thought he can still hear the people around the house, the voices have quieted. 

Kuroo brings Kenma up to his face and brushes a piece of hair out of his face.

“You are so pretty Kenma.”

Kenma’s face scrunches up in embarrassment and turns red.

“Shut up.” Despite the words, there is no vicious tone in his voice and Kuroo knows that he’s just flustered.

Kuroo brings their faces closer together and says “Happy Birthday, Kenma.” Before kissing him.

5-

“Hello?”

“Kuroo?” Kenma says, sounding nasally and emotional, like he’s been crying.

“Yeah it’s me. You alright?” Kuroo replies already feeling worried for Kenma.

“No.” 

“What’s wrong?” 

“You made a mistake.” Kenma says, voice wavering. “I shouldn’t be captain. They don’t listen to me no matter how loud I try to be. The first years are constantly yelling and jumping around and nothing ever gets done. I can’t do this anymore. I have to quit.”

“Kenma, they aren’t doing this on purpose believe me i’ve-”

“You don’t know what it’s like to be a failure Kuro! You were always the perfect captain, able to fix anyones problems with just a stupid speech. I don’t have any talent in volleyball and everyone is finally realizing it after I can't hide behind you.” Kenma says aggressively.

“Kenma. You are so talented. You are one of the best setters I know-” Kenma snorts through the phone. “I’m serious. You don’t have the best technique i’ve ever seen, but you see so much. You can come up with the best strategies when you put your mind to it.” Kuroo says.

“I know how tough it can be to get younger players in line, but believe me, when you finally see their full potential and put it all together, you can create a well-oiled-machine. Please just keep trying. For me.”

“I- I just don’t know what to do.” Kenma says after a moment of silence. “How do you get them to listen?”

“Be calm and keep your head. Try to be as authoritative as you can be, and try to show them some cool plays. That always gets them excited.” Kuroo responds.

They both laugh quietly.

“Thank you, Tetsurou.” Kenma says, sounding a lot more calm.

“Anytime, Kitten.” Kuroo responds. “Feel free to call me whenever you need advice. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

1+

“Hello, welcome to Arcadia.” Kenma says from behind the counter. This job is his favorite one he’s had so far, not because of the customers, but because of the games that are around the store. 

The customer that came through the door nods her head and starts walking around the small store. 

Kuro comes out of the back holding his bag and some headphones.

“I’ll see you at home, my shifts over for today.” Kenma nods and Kuroo gives one of his small genuine smiles.

While Kuroo is saying goodbye and getting the rest of his things, the young girl that came in just a few minutes earlier comes up to the counter.

She smiles shyly and tucks her hair behind her ears while Kenma rings her up. He doesn't pay any mind and just says “Your total comes up to $12.04.” She nods and pulls out her wallet. After she has paid for her game, she says “Um- can we- I mean- do you want to go out for lunch some time?” 

Kenma’s eyes widen. Kuro is standing behind him ready to say something when kenma kicks him under the counter lightly.

“No thanks. Sorry though. Your pretty and all but I’m taken.” kenma says with a bored look on his face. She looks suprised and says “By who?”

“The guy behind me.”

Her face falls into an embarrassed smile and she quickly bows and basically runs out of the shop.

They both let out relieved sighs they didn't realize they were keeping in, and looked at each other before breaking out into small chuckles.

“Wow, I’m surprised at how good you handled that. If we were still in high school you would have turned red and started stammering or something. I guess my shy little Kenma is long gone now.” Kuroo says teasingly as he packs the last of his things from the store.

“Yeah, yeah. Go away.” Kenma says with a red flush on his faced at being teased. Kuroo smirks and pulls Kenma’s face in for a goodbye kiss before leaving. 

“See you at home.” Kuroo says.

“Yeah, see you.”

-END-

WOOO that probably the longest fic i’ve posted on here haha! Hope u enjoy my shitty writing!

[kanene-yaaay-o-retorno]

How To Catch a Friend

Kanene’s note: Heyaaa!  Well, this is a very late fanfic written due @kieraelieson‘s Make This In Your Only Style Contest. I choose prompt one because it was the one that most inspired me, and I really like the result!

Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:

* That is an Alternative Universe with Fairy!Patton, Magic!Logan, Witch!Virgil and Magic!Roman

* This characters do not belongs to me. They all belongs to Thomas Sanders in his series of Sanders Sides.

* Warning for Angst (but only a bit), cursing, fighting, mention of explosions, slightly hurt/comfort and brief shouting.  This has about 7.000 words because I got hella inspired due this very good prompt. Kiera, I am looking directly at you XDDD <333. Thankys for the inspiration!

* I didn’t proof read it very well, so I am sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any advice is very very welcome!

* Want to know more about this AU? Here is a post for ya! They’re precious and I will fight for them. Thankys for reading, my lollipops! Stay calm, take a time to yourself, remember to eat today, hug asoft thing, make a wish, drink water and sleep well! Byeioo!~

[~*~]

“I can’t do anything right!” The tiny fairy cried, crumpling forlornly onto the stump.

Logan realized then that the dare to keep walking had not been intended to be possible. He frowned slightly, wondering if it was even possible to comfort the little thing when he was the one to upset him.

“Please don’t cry. I can step back and you can try again to trap me.”

The fairy sniffed, wiping his eyes. “You would do that?”

“Certainly. I’ve tried enough difficult things to know that it sometimes it takes several attempts to get it right.”

“Ohh, okay!” His tiny head nodded thoughtfully, the hair strands bouncing a bit with the movements, which made Logan wonder how the gravity influenced the little being and if he could bring up this discussion in his school.

Definitely not during class, the other kids didn’t like when he talked a lot, especially about things that weren’t in the book and ‘therefore’ - Logan didn’t grasp the logic in this. Books are great, however can’t contain all the knowledge that existed about the subject and most of the time their approach wasn't nearly as interesting as it should be. - weren’t important to say.

Logan couldn’t understand how could exist something that wasn’t worth being said or asked.

“How do gravity work on you?” He blurted out, looking behind, the tip of his tongue out matching with the frown on his face as the boy tried to step on his exact footsteps previously left on the dry dirt.

The fairy hummed, the movements of his wings making him to go slowly up and down, up and down, up and down. Like a seesaw, Logan would point, if he wasn’t so concentrated on the task of retreating and re-doing his previous steps very carefully. A funny image of himself and the fairy playing on the toy would also pop on his mind, perhaps making a giggle bubble on his chest.

The small magical being, in other hand, would think it was more like a leaf swinging back and forth on their branch before falling, the actual image of him and a very small human swinging and holding a branch as they smiled shining among his thoughts for three pieces of time, leading a giggle to escape and shake the tip of his wings. But he quickly tapped his temple a few times, attempting to poke that thought away.

The other fairies said he got attached too much easily.

“I don’t know.” The human seemed flatter his shoulders with a ‘oh’ and the winged being couldn’t help but continue his sentence, hurried “But I know how to sing in bee! Ah, please stop right there!”

The boy did as requested, his left hand running on the spine of his book back and forth, making the other wonder if the letters inside it were bigger than his – comparatively – tiny hands. His gaze fled until it met with the bigger being sparkled eyes. “Do you? Really? Why do I need to stop here?”

“Because it’s the closest where my trap is, kiddo! I’m going to redo the magic really quick. Then I can show you a bit of the dance!!” His tune bathed itself in joy, his hair strands looking as if they were floating in the air with how fast he flicked his wings, coming down to grab a brown pot, a silver liquid gleaming inside it. He stepped on the ground, spilling the potion on ten green leaves before going up, the liquid following him on absurdly thin strings that the magic fairy used to tie on the lower branches from the tree shading their forms, intelligible words coming out his mouth during the whole process.

The strings then spiraled before turning invisible.

“There! You can try to pass again, please, please, please!”

“Thank you,” the boy replied, remembering it was polite to reply with a good word when someone used a good word with you.

But it didn’t work. Again. The one who spent hours and hours preparing the potion - not only the simplest spell, but the simplest magic human trap - felt a painful tug on his stomach. The mean thoughts came back one more time, but he was too much distracted looking at the unfazed silver strings to poke them out.

“A-are you really a human?” He sniffed.

“Yes. I believe I am.”

“I can’t even catch the easier prey in the world!”

The young human noticed the distress on the other, this making an unpleasant feeling scratch his chest. He thought about what he could do to help. Usually talking about things he understood helped him. Yes, he really liked to talk. It felt good and very, very warm. Not hot. Hot made him stink and gave a really disgusting feeling on his skin. Talking was warm, different and good. Especially when people paid attention to him.

He could pay attention to the fairy. He also liked to listen.

“Why wouldn’t it work if I was not a human?”

“Humans are too much curio-ous to feel the magic or run away from it. This was the simplest potion to catch you! I spent an entire day preparing it, the ingredients aren’t hard to find, b-but I get very distracted.”

“Do you want me to come back tomorrow so you can try again?”

The tiny fairy blinked, looking at him with awe. “Would you do that?”

“Yes, of course. That is why I offered.”

“Oh, my stars. You’re the best human ever! Thank you, thank you, thank you, kiddo!!”

However, then he remembered a thing about humans. Humans are liars. They’re always busy, full of things to do and words empty of meaning to share. His bright smile fell a bit. 

 Well, at least they had the good luck of spending some time together having fun, right? Something deep down which wasn’t prepared to say goodbye grabbed the first excuse which appeared on his mind, didn’t want it to end just yet. “Do you still wanna see the dance?”

“Yes!” His wide eyes followed as the winged creature danced in loops and shaking his body, a soft buzzing filling the wind along with giggling.

“It can tickle.” It’s the explanation after he is done. Logan nods, making notes on the book he is carrying around, the tip of his tongue showing out again. He suddenly stops.

“What does it mean?”

“What?” The other asks, sitting on the pages and discovering with a joyful couple of clicks that his hands are actually bigger than the letters!

“The dance. Mom says that not everything has a meaning, which is weird but I remember seeing on TV that bee’s dance is commonly used to communicate, share localizations and therefore all their dances mean something. What does it say?”

“Oh,” he traced a letter with his finger, feeling the texture and avoiding the taller one gaze, “goodbye.”

“Thank you.” Logan nodded, circling some symbols and adding more symbols above it “Can you move, please? The Sun is beginning to set, I need to go home.” Both were momentarily embraced by the silence as the fairy moved to sit on a near branch, swinging his legs distractedly as a bird sang near, their attention captured by the melody.

The boy was the first to get out of the trance when the song stopped. “I’m going to be back by the same time tomorrow.” He wondered if fairies had clocks, however something on his mind said ‘no’, probably because the small being wasn’t always looking at his pulse and clicked for an entirely different reason. “Two hours before the sunset.” He provided, his chest for some reason scratching again when he didn’t see the excited flutter of the tip of the other’s wings, or the floating hair, just a smile.

“Okay.” Humans were busy, full of things to do, full of important tasks to attend.

They don’t come back.

“I will wait for you.” Patton - but Logan didn’t know this yet (and would him ever?) - answered with the most truthful sentence he could gather.

“Ok.”

Both waved as the distance between them increased, smiling their own small smiles.

The other fairies said he got attached too easily.

[~*~]

“Good afternoon, fairy.”

“You came back.” Patton’s mouth was wide open, the small pot shaking precariously on his hold, his utensil falling and being forgotten beside the rock where he sat. This couldn’t be true. Was it true? Was the damsels of wind and light pranking him with illusions? 

Humans didn’t come back.

They didn’t care enough to come back.

But not this human.

“You came back!! You really came back!” Suddenly it was like the Sun had set on his stomach, filling his entire body with warmth and rays and sparkles and energy and warmth, warmth, warmth!

“Clearly. Just as I said I would.” The human’s voice sounded a lot more near now, since Patton bust in his direction, flying around the other in a paint of loops, twirls and giddy giggling that didn’t take long before being accompanied by the taller own huffed giggles. “Is it a bee dance again? What does it say?”

“No! It’s a Patton dance and it means ‘Welcome Back’!!”

“Patton?”

“Yes! That is me!” The tiny fairy landed on his hair, gasping a bit, unaware of his wings messing with some hair strands with their incessant, uncontrollable flapping.

“You’re not a specie.”

“Nope! But I’m as special as one! Just like you’re also the only one of your kind!”

“I’m not the only human that exists.”

“Yup! But you're the only one that thinks, feels and lives just like you.” Patton could feel the human frown in confusion. Clicks filled the air as he tried to think in how to explain his thoughts. “Everyone is... special. The Universe will never be able to make another Patton again, that is why I exist and that is why it’s a Patton Dance!”

“Hm.” Logan didn’t actually understand everything, but his mom told him every opinion is important, even if sometimes you think they’re wrong... or weird. The little magical being was a bit weird. Other people said Logan was also weird, usually when he talks a lot about a lot of things.

The boy decided it was a cozy feeling, being weird with Patton.

“My name is Logan.”

[~*~]

Virgil was not worried.

He was a witch. He studied every single spell put in front of him in the most complete way possible. All the weakness, all the dangers, all the consequences, all the afterwards effects, all the ingredients, the necessary rituals... Everything. His full nickname on the academy used to be Thunderstorm of Stormclouds due his habit of knowing all the details, all the books, as if he devoured every bit of information in front of him. His dorm was often full of sounds and explosions of his incessant attempts of replicating all the magic learned.

That is the why of ‘Thunderstorm’.

But never, ever, any accident happened in the classes he one day attended. Because he was careful. He understood the dangers of magic and its instability. He mastered protection spells and charms and it wasn’t before him to wait for all of his classmates to go to sleep to sneak out of the dorms and shove on a big part of the building a bunch of security magic. 

The thought of that, even years later, if the professors searched carefully, they would still find some of his amulets between the walls’ small holes and webs on the ceiling still made a toothless smile cripple on his face.

So, back then, even if people were wary of him most of time, they still felt safe enough around him - and honestly, to Virgil that more than enough - that is why of ‘Stormcloud’.

It wasn’t that Virgil didn’t trust his professors or classmates. He was just prudent.

TOTALLY DIFFERENT FROM THOSE TWO KIDS!

Virgil huffed from the shadow he was sat, camouflaging his form as his gaze traveled to the watch on his pulse, confirming that one hour had already passed and the tiny fairy - Patton, as it seems - didn’t come back looking for any forgotten belongings. His form sunk in the darkness, submerging on every tree’s shadow in a ray of thirty meters to check the strong points on the protection spell he casted there on the last week. The tight knot on his stomach loosening with the acknowledgement that his entomagic triggered in the afternoon didn’t affect it, even if the guilt kept the knot firmly where it was.

The witch didn’t expect such a bigger reaction from them, when he first set the spell. It was something simple, really, only a few groups of spiders, ants and caterpillars appearing from a dull thud around the two unsupervised kids playing with magic and trying to crawl on them. A quick, unharmful and scary enough act to make them flee and hopefully go to get an adult next time they desired to practice their spell abilities.

But Virgil should’ve known how much terrifying an army of insects would be to a fairy, who immediately screamed as the scene before him settled and attached himself onto his friend – Logan, I think? – the fear apparently taking over his body, leading him to half fly and half stumble around the human, confusing and startled him enough to fall and kick in despair to get the most away as possible from the animals.

The adult immediately undid the spell, realizing how spectacularly it failed – like most of the things he tried to do, ha – however, he couldn’t just make the small whimpers and tears from the other’s two disappear in a ‘puff’ as well, his heart being squeezed with the scene of Logan trying to clumsily hug an obviously shaken Patton as him himself tried to stop his trembling limbs. And, even if Virgil deposited in a near, visible rock a small chocolate bar with curative properties and whispered soothing, soft words on the wind and made them fly to the others until they both were calm again, he couldn’t bring himself to go away back to his cottage like any other day. 

He quietly accompanied the two as they ate his treat (not after Logan’s analyze and final word that it was safe, of course) and forgot the trap in order to play and have fun a few feet from its original location and then talk about stars and planets, a subject which seemed to interest both parts.

Virgil wasn’t good with social etiquettes, so it took some great days of searching to discover how to apologize in Fairies Language and to find the exact gift he was looking for. 

He put the star map and the small pot of cider inside a trunk, visible enough to be seen only for the younglings when they arrived in the same spot they always met. 

The witch took a deep breath, shaking his head. No. Nope. His work here was done. He put charms and spells around the place. They would be fine. They would be okay and even better as the adult stopped to put his nose on their business. There was absolutely no reason for him to keep extending it. He would go back to his cottage and to his normal life, just like it was and always had been.

Just like it was supposed to be. It had been fun to remember those times from the academy, when people trusted him and actually got a gleam on their eyes when he entered the place. 

But this wasn’t his academy. Virgil had nothing to do with Patton and Logan. He should go.

And that was what he did.

[~*~]

To their and his own credit, it took about one month in its entirety before things came crashing down in an avalanche.

He was quite impressed, when he stopped to think about it. But on the day the events occurred? He was terrified.

And he knew, believe me, Virgil knew very well when the wind got a tad stronger than it usually was, causing the fairy to lose his balance and slightly hit the boy’s hands, not even hard enough to hurt any of them, but enough to cause a distraction and to let an extra drop of Waterfalls Tears – secure, easy to find, easy to lose. Extremely volatile when used together with Aqua Flower’s petals; Used on the Old Era due its beautiful pyrotechnics – on the mix. More specifically, the mix of Dandelions Roars, Rainbow Feathers and Aqua Flowers, that none of them, except for him, would notice the mistake before it was too late. 

Before their eyes got wide as the mix started to spark, air full-filling in clicking sounds as the pot heated on the point its own porcelain almost melted, too much scared and distracted by the louds sounds that grew louder, louder, louder to acknowledge the trepidation of quick, desperate footsteps getting closer and closer of them.

Aqua Flowers and Waterfall Tears. 

Virgil knew the dangers of magic. He knew that he spent hours planting and sneaking protective spells and amulets as well as charms, the exact ones he was trespassing right now, enough to keep them safe especially to moments like that without his help or interference.

Aqua Flowers and Waterfall Tears. 

This is not safe. Run. They need to run.

He knew about explosions and scars and the consequences. He knew about despair, the paralyzing fear taking over their bodies, and yet the witch found himself wishing they would just run, go away, to be safe.

Why was he back? 

Aqua Flowers Waterfall Tears. 

Not safe. Not safe. They need to run, run,

RUN

They were just kids playing with things that they don’t entirely understand. They had nothing to do with him. They would survive. They would be okay, eventually. Things like that took some time, but they eventually heal. Everyone eventually heals. He has nothing to prove, nothing to owe to them. 

Why the fuck was him back?

Patton screamed something he couldn’t understand with his heart beating pulsing on his ears, Logan firmly closed his eyes – so fearful, so wide – and covered his ears, curling on his own form as the sparkles and bolts shouted from the bowl. Virgil got faster, stronger.

He got close enough to involve both with his arms, hugging them close to his chest as his body turned in a dangerous slip, creating a physical barrier between the younglings and the explosion, which hit him more like a hot wave than something actually dangerous. Good. It had worked. He felt trembling forms under his touch, except the witch couldn’t really tell if it was Patton, Logan or his own wobbly hands.

“Shh, shhh. It’s okay. You’re okay.” His gaze, sharp, wary, darted to the ground behind him, looking for any hints of other danger lurking near, signing in relief when found nothing, altered breathing. 

Oh stars, he was getting too old for this shit. “The explosion is over. It can’t hurt you anymore. You’re okay, you’re okay, you’re okay.” Only then, after being sure nothing really represented danger anymore, Virgil turned his attention to the kids in his embrace.

He first noticed the boy inside a brown shield, a coat of arms on the necklace hanging on his neck shining brighter or duller as Logan seemed to mumble something to it, small words and nods as he kept his hands firmly pressed on his ears. So the youngling kept an own protective amulet with him? Smart boy.

It was only when the witch stared the fairy glaring at him with gleaming, warm eyes, mouth slightly open that the gears on his mind looked to start functioning again.

‘…the kids on his embrace’

Oh no. No, no, no. He had just jumped on act, taken over by his instincts again and then screwed everything blowing his cover up during the process, hadn’t he?

Fuck.

The realization seemed to just got stronger as Patton open and closed his mouth a bunch of times, the tip of his wings fluttering in a way that probably was terror, leading the fairy to go up and down, up and down in maybe a despair to run away, but too much afraid to actively leave his friend alone with that scary random guy who jumped out a damn shadow and grabbed them out from nowhere.

Well done, Virgil. Well hecking done. Now you terrified those kids out of their mind. They can’t even speak properly anymore. You don’t even know how fairies or kids work! Now look at this, you broke them!

“It’s you!” To the one dressed with the long vestments typical of witches blinked astonished when the first thing to come out from the small being lips wasn’t a scream. Patton only beamed more, his smile increasing as he closed his eyes and concentrated. “It’s really you!!”

“Why did you do that?” Logan, who previously dissolved the magic shield asked, his tune free of discomfort, blank and curious.

“I…”

“Logan, Logan, it’s him!!” and, before any of them could add anything else, Patton continued amidst his clicks “It’s the kind witch!!”

[~*~]

“No.” He said firmly, internally wishing he seemed a whole lot sterner than he sounded.

Virgil was a skilled witch. He knew things enough to be a requested warrior at the beginning of his career, quickly turning on the most feared opponent due his tactics. He was the Stormcloud: fast, wary, unpredictable, soundless, using the environment in his favor with hidden traps and shadows for locomotion. His attacks were restless and never unfair. He was strong, resolute…

And he was NOT going to lose because of Puppy Eyes.

“No,” he repeated, trying to keep his composure when even Logan pouted, “give up, I’m not going to throw Patton in the air, especially just to see how the gravity works on a fairy.”

“But it’s an experiment!”  Logan quickly pointed, frustration painting his tune as if Virgil couldn’t understand the importance of this statement. “This is what science is for!” Virgil sensed a small wave of deja vu, feeling like he had already heard this somewhere else. 

“He can fall and injure himself and I’m not going to spend my ingredients to make a heal potion when I could avoid the injury in the first place.” 

“But, but, but! I’m not going to fall, you're going to catch me. I know it! I trust you!” And then, in a totally unfair move Patton held Virgil’s index finger between his palms, somewhat increasing his pleading eyes, “If something goes wrong, I can fly!! Please, please, kind witch.”

Virgil growled, deviating his eyes to Logan.

“He is correct. This is what science is for. Please.” The boy adjusted his glasses, looking pointedly to him. “Science.”

Virgil growled louder, however extending his hand to the tiny fairy, who excitedly flied around his head a few times before changing his way to hug his left cheek, clicks and fluttering wings materializing his delight while Logan swung back and forth on his feet, fists shaking and a toothy smile painting his expression. 

How Virgil was supposed to say no to that joy? The adult internally signed. These kids were going to be the end of his existence.

“Quick, before I change my mind.” He lied to cover his soft spot for them – not that would ever admit it – snorting as Patton quickly shoved himself on his palm and Logan hurriedly ran to get his notebook and pen from the blue, looking slightly old, backpack.

And, as Patton was thrown, his squeals of excitement along with the fast scribbles of Logan’s pen filled the air Virgil allowed a small grin to wander on his face.

[~*~]

“Mom is in the yard today.” Logan announced as he arrived, accepting the sandwich offered for Virgil, looking at its content and giving a happy hum as he found it had onions on it, picking one ring and eating it apart. 

“Oh, that is fantastic, Lo!” Patton said, had already finished his snack and now taken a few Colorless Petals from his purse. “Will she stay there today?” 

“Yes, I think. She will be waiting for me when I come back.”

“Great! Look, I finally found everything we need! We can start my trap again!”

“Does she like gardening?” Logan hummed in agreement, his eyes fixed on the new ingredients, probably memorizing them to write later. Logan’s mom is still a mystery to Virgil, the most near of a responsible adult in this boy’s life being Remy, a guy who his magic almost danced from his body - leading cold chills to run the witch’s spine - when they first met right after the Aqua and Waterfall accident. The coat of arms Logan used was definitely from him, and by the way Remy’s questions about the accident were precise, it was definitely much more than just an ordinary and simple protection advice. 

The witch would be much more defensive and wary on that day if he hadn't previous Magic checked the amulet and found only protection and kind, lovely feelings involving it. Patton, as a fairy, one of the most sensitive magic beings of the world, also seemed to trust the object, so he did his best to not attack or hiss at the stranger (even though both looked to have come to a silent agreement they didn’t like each other) when he showed up other times.

“We could search for some seed flowers to give her later, then. You think she would like it?” Logan nodded, humming contentedly a ballad about flowers and peaches. Virgil turned to Patton’s direction, frowning as he noticed the purse’s content. “Where are the Dandelions Roars? I thought they were the crucial part of the trap.”

Patton froze for a second, his breathing failing, but he quickly forced himself to act naturally, wishing the perceptive human hadn’t got his mood’s drop, “I, uhh, I found a new receipt of a new trap that I think will work better!” He wasn’t lying, “it’s a harder potion, so I will have to practice a bit more, but I’m sure this time I will succeed!”

“Oh, ok.”

[~*~]

The drop of Wind’s Whispers hit the pot and suddenly Virgil’s soul froze. After weeks of frowning and strange twitches on the pit of his stomach, he recognized the potion, no, the summoning they were doing.

“Patton!!” Loud, harsh tune. The fairy froze in the same place. 

He knew it. He knew it he knew it knewitknewitknewit. 

Virgil discovered everything.

He would try to stop Patton. 

The tiny magic being held the porcelain and, in a flash, hid it in one of the thousands branches above them. “Please, please, don’t!” Virgil’s eyes were traveling from tree to tree, trying to find the object, his heart pounding, his head spinning and the fairy had plenty of knowledge of why. 

It was risky, much riskier than anything anyone could ever try. But it was worth it. It was so worth it. Virgil would have to understand. “V, please, listen to me.”

“No, Patton!! You lied! You lied to me to do… that!” Virgil attempted to even his breathing, he would have to concentrate if he wanted to end this as quickly as possible. Unfinished potions were extremely hard to localize, but being a forbidden magic made it a tad easier. Patton got closer but he refused to deviate his attention. The adult gritted his teeth. He did not understand. “You’re not stupid, Patton. You KNOW what happened to everyone who tried to do that! You know about the rumors, about the marks and especially WHY this is a forbidden trap! You know all of this and don’t you dare to try to fool me again.”

That sentence hurt. It bruised almost as much as the hurt the witch tried to suppress from his glare. The fairy didn’t know he was clicking until this moment but the desperate sound was almost impossible to ignore now. “No, no, Virgil. I didn’t want to… The fairies, we have a new idea, a new way to make it and now it can work, Virgil! It can work and I can finally do something right and I have-”

“You HAVE? Patton? You have what? Put yourself, put me and Logan in danger just because of a dumb bunch of fairies that don’t even care about who you really are? Is it because of that you were trying to kill us all?”

There was a sound banging on the background. It was banging and pleading for attention but Virgil pushed it away.

“It’s not because of them! I don’t want to catch a star for any of them! I just want to-”

STOOOOOOP!

The sound harshly hit them as a strong wave of magic passed all of Virgil’s protection spells, breaking them as if they were made of glass and shoving the other two on the ground, both attention being deviated from the discussion and captured by Logan. A Logan involved by a thundering, navy waves of magic which fled and hit everything on its way. Virgil felt his voice disappear.

Logan wasn’t a human.

“Lo.” Patton was the first to speak, trying to crawl to his friend’s position even being clued on the ground with the waves’ force. “Lo, dear, please, look at me, okay, kiddo? I am sorry we were screaming. Look at me, look at me.”

SHUUUUUT UUUUP!

“Everything is okay.” The pressure on his body made his voice hoarse, however the witch pushed forward, getting on his knees, arms in front of him in a calming gesture, “we’re okay. You’re okay. I need you to take deep breaths, okay? You can do it, I know you can.”

Logan shook his head, gasping. With the corner of his eye the adult realized the pot floating from the second tree on the left, its content starting to gleam in a strong red color, and sudden dizziness took over his body. 

The trap had been activated.

“Of course, you can! You’re so, so strong and brave and really smart and cool. I believe in you, Logan. You can control it.”

The porcelain object slowly floated in Logan’s direction, looking as if it was devouring every bit of magic being thrown at it together with all the remnants of the environment. Virgil got up on his wobbly legs, gathering on his vestments all his attack potions and throwing at it from all the directions, activating on his run his protections charms and directing them to the trap with despair, the feeling only increasing as his efforts were broken by the force without even managing to touch the container. 

The color started to grow brighter and brighter, a portal opening above it, consuming more and more of the uncontrollable magic. If Patton was sensing it, he resolved to ignore, using the opportunity to get closer from his friend, his voice in a constant tune, talking and calming, soothing and warm.

But all the three of them couldn’t ignore the moment everything stopped.

The harsh strong waves ceased its explosion and came back to Logan, who laid with a silent thud on Virgil’s arms. The leaves on the tree stilled, soundless, birds were nowhere to be seen, wind frozen midair, Patton’s voice was muted and even their beating hearts were paralyzed during this piece of time. An horrible ringing exploding in their ears.

The light turned white, stealing their breath.

And then everyone and everything was engulfed by it.

…

..

.

..

…

“Hello?”

Patton was the first to feel his senses come back. His eyelids trembled before opening and he had exactly a second to realize he was laid on Virgil’s coat.

Because on the other tick of the clock, his gaze was captured by the tall, smiling, magic – so, so, so magic. In every atom, every blink, every cosmic dust around him, they all screamed magic, magic, magic! -  creature looking down at him. “What a hello, little fairy!”

And then Patton screamed. Because the last minutes of his life were the most horrible, nerve wrecking moments he ever imagined to feel. Because his friends were unconscious. Because he was scared, and more important than everything else…

Because his trap had worked.

“No, no, no, little nebula, calm down, calm down” The being began to move his hands without any idea of what to do with them, “I’m not going to hurt you, okay? AAAH!”

The star screamed because that sinister thing under the fairy moved, launching to a sitting position while it also screamed, and, on his turn, Virgil screamed because he got up to a big shadow hovering above him and moving closer to the fairy, that is also why his arm shooted to be around Patton, his chest vibrating as he hissed to the other being, eyes sharp and yet trying to focus on its human looking like features.

“Don’t you dare to touch him!”

“No, no, Virgil!” Patton finally saw the one who was captured by the trap, - by their trap – absorbing the way colorful dots shined on the other’s skin, how the eyes staring back at him were deep and antique and yet so joyful. He noticed how the hair floated playfully, as if the being had a kind of its own gravity, reminding the winged fairy of himself when he got really excited. Actually, Patton could feel some light brushes on his neck from his hair moving around. “Virgil, Virgil! It worked!! We did it!! We really did it!! We trapped a shooting star!” Then, his voice came out lower, as if he really acknowledged what this truly meant. “Now I can give Logan a wish.”

“A wish?” 

“A wish, indeed! It’s a pleasure, the bestest of the pleasure, to finally get to know you earthlings! You’re really so cute, makes me want to squeeze your poor soft materialized face! By the way, everything is so soft and light here! No wonders such little gravity is enough to keep everything down. I bet I could carry your all, no, explode that, I can carry you and all the Earth’s content all together! That sounds fun. What is the most heavy thing you have here? I’m going to lift it. Ah, right, I almost forgot” He lightly hit the side of his head, his words coming out non stop, as if he didn’t need to breathe, what, looking at the situation, was much more likely it, “Star Roman Prince, at your service for one wish and one wish only! Even though I was captured by three of you, my power is too much, well,” he laughed, loud and boisterous, “powerful to interfere more than necessary on the planets. So, choose well, little ones.”

“Are you really a star?” and the young bipedal who had just woken up was so full of reverence that Roman felt the magic dance inside him as a lovely breeze. Yes, that was it! That was exactly it he was imagining, – for ages and ages wandering in space. Able to watch and graze at any planet he could ever imagine and desire, but never visit them without being invited – truly dreamed for the moment when he would finally be caught, no, be claimed for a terraqueous.

He was glad he didn’t need oxygen to survive, because the view would absolutely have his breath taken away. There were so much green and vivid colors and things to touch and life! So, so, so much life and companies and being who he could actually talk to.

Oh, my gracious Universe. Roman could talk with them. He could talk, sing, ramble, explain, complain, discuss and be answered.

It made him kind of want they never wished anything in the first place. This way he could stay more.

“Yes, I,” and then he jumped holding the sing-sang word as he took the form of a fairy in mid air, holding the other’s fairy hand and spinning him a few times – smiling wider as the other squealed excitedly – before turning into the height of the second shortest of the group, conjuring a small vision of a particular cozy Universe’s corner before growing to a perfect replicata of the adult there, booping his face and taking steps away as the taller hissed, finally stopping his melody, “am!”

The tiny fairy clapped happily, flying closer, “I am Patton!”

“A pleasure.”

“Stars are loud.” Logan pointed with his usual blank voice, then hummed, a toothless smile painting his features as he went to get his loyal notebook.

“Well, stars got to shine. ~”

“And we are going to have a conversation. A private conversation.” The second sentence came sharp, cutting any remark the cosmic magic being was about to say. Virgil’s eyes seemed to stare deep into his core before gently shoving the younglings aside.

“A star?” It was the first thing that came out from his mouth, directed especially to Patton, since the other boy seemed occupied taking new notes on his book. “You were trying to catch a shooting star for Logan?” 

“He is… my first best friend. Ever. And he loves stars a big lot! And, and, and I thought… I’m not very good or powerful to give him a really great thing like a star, but… If I could catch a shooting star then he could have a wish and ask to see a constellation! Or to have one! Or to visit any planet! I just… wanted to give him something cool.”

“Patton, come here.” The witch extended his palm, carefully ruffling Patton’s hair when he sat there, his voice was soft. “You are a pretty cool guy, okay? Logan thinks that too.”

“Of course I do.” Logan said, yet writing even when a yawn escaped from his lips. Something about how nonchalant and sure he sounded, as if it was silly to doubt about it in the first place made Patton feel like his tiny form was full of Suns, again. 

“And I hope you both use your wish wistfully.” The two kids brightened up right away, the fear hidden deep in their minds that the adult would somewhat forbid them to interact with the new person – kind of – dissolving in pure bouncing excitement. “But never ever again you two dare to ever think about trying to do something dangerous like that without warning me first!” 

They nodded eagerly, bouncing up and down, making Virgil sign loudly, questioning all his life choices and shaking his hands to dismiss them “Go think about what you two want or whatever, your little demons.”

They didn’t take long before losing themselves in a joyful ramble with each other. Virgil took the opportunity to deviate his attention to the older one, who was trying to coach a very suspicious bird to come closer to him, narrowing his eyes. The guy reminded him those geniuses belonged to those old, with yellowish corners, tales where thousands of humans, monsters and magic beings were disgraced as their wishes were evilly twisted to go against them.

Well, he got closer from the other, who turned to him with a charming smile, this guy was about to have a big storm coming if he thought they would be so easily tricked.

“What.” said Roman.

“You…” Virgil started, warningly. 

‘Got it.’ Roman thought, smugly and immediately expanding his brightness to an astonishing level. 

“Done!” He announced, happily “Since you requested so eagerly for my company then that shall be!” He ignored the human irritated shout. “Oh, what an honor! That, of course, means I will stay together with you through your whole journey in this human form and therefore be free from my duty until your wish is fully granted! It will certainly be an awesome experience!”

“Awww, you asked for a new friend, V!” Patton didn’t seem sad for losing his chance, smiling wide and patting one of the human’s red cheeks.

“It was an accident!”

Logan made a low small upset sound on the back of his throat. “I desire to know how to properly set and activate the trap… We did it wrong. We messed up the steps and nearly didn’t put all the ingredients as asked, but it still worked, how?” He turned his head to Roman, who lowered his body a little in order to read the step-to-step spell written on the boy’s calligraph, he tsked in disapproval, taking the object and summoning a feather pen, starting to scratch a bunch of lines from the receipt.

“No, no, that is definitely wrong. That is the magic you were trying to use to get a shooting star? Damn, just don’t. You do this and you’ll definitely get a Supernova.” Then he stopped, his mouth slightly open, a lamp popping above his head, gleaming. “Oooh, that explains why Remus was always being claimed. I just thought earthlings didn’t like me.” For lonely and long thousands of years, “heh, silly me. Aaaand, there you go, kid! A brand new magic to get a brilliant Shooting Star as well as, of course, the wish.”

“Do you know a Supernova? Roman, that is so cool!!” Patton gasped. 

“Of course I do, he is my brother.”

“The astros can be related? I didn’t expect it to be possible. How?” 

Patton’s laughter and Logan’s questions made him smile, not that the witch would ever admit it. Well, maybe... maybe there was nothing more he could do now except keep an eye on them, right? Just because the star- no, Roman, - could turn out being dangerous too, sure. It has nothing to do he got utterly attached to the young ones. No, get off his thoughts, damn!

And, yes, things weren’t fully resolved. They haven’t thought about what to do about Logan’s outburst or how Patton’s managed to get the forbidden trap or to even fully understand what Roman was. However, as questions, answers and warm – that good warmth, which embraces your heart - feelings fled all around them, Virgil felt the anxious knot on stomach to ease a bit, relaxing before the scene of the rays of sunshine dancing with the Damsels of the Wind in between the leaves and trunks from the forest. A calm breeze attempted to carry all the smiles and grand gestures to a faraway land as the reminiscent magic began to disappear, and, along with all of this… 

They were okay.

…

The entire ground trembled when Remy suddenly appeared between them, even if his clothes were a mess, hair uneven and face marked by brown drops which could be just dirt on the best scenario his crossed arms sent shivers down almost everyone's spine – Roman’s ‘nice’ fell on deaf ears – and his voice wasn’t boisterous or even loud, but echoed, cutting the thick silence skillfully. 

“What the HECK happened here?”     

[meetmeinthematinee]

John Wick Gift Exchange: Portraits Hung With Care--Helen x John Wick

For @overheardatthecontinental​‘s John Wick Gift Exchange I got @bladeangelx​Hope you enjoy this fluffy meet-cute of John & Helen. It’s not specifically holiday themed but I think it will leave your heart warm and cozy.

A Note: This is super fluffy. Very fleeting and non-graphic descriptions of a leg and face injury related to John. Alcohol is mentioned in passing. 

Portraits Hung With Care

“Hels, what are you doing?” 

She looked over her shoulder from her perch atop a stepladder, nails held between her lips as she hammered a picture hanger into the wall. She shook her head playfully, shifting just so, taking the nails out of her mouth. 

“What does it look like, John?”

“Like you could use a hand?”

“You’re not exactly dressed for that.”

“It’s a few nails in a wall Hels. I’ve done worse in better clothes.”

Her laugh rang through the small gallery space. 

“I don’t doubt that Wick.” 

A slightly more pink-cheeked John took the nails she was offering in her outstretched hand. She held onto them for a moment, leaning down slightly as John wrapped his hand around her calf and tilted his face up towards her. Their mouths meeting in a slow, lingering kiss that left Helen feeling flushed all over. 

 Theirs was a bit of a strange romance. But then again, John was a bit of a strange man. At first. And if she was being truthful with herself--he still was. But he was honest and so thoughtful and most importantly for her--he was always there. A steady presence in her life. It had happened so slowly that neither one of them had wholly realized what was happening until they were together.

John wasn’t looking for anyone new to add to the motley crew of his life. He was in permanent residence at the Continental, he had money to burn and plenty of jobs to keep him busy. Bookbinding was something he’d taken up as a hobby. He was a voracious reader and spent hours trawling through antique stores and bookshops looking for downtrodden tomes to restore. He hated anyone knowing much about him and after one too many questions from other Continental folks about the books and supplies he was usually carting around he’d settled on renting a small studio space where he could work on his books away from the questions and comments. Plus, his rooms at the hotel weren’t exactly set up for this kind of work anyhow.  

Helen’s pocket sized gallery happened to be just a few doors down from his studio. John was surprised to see a picture of his favourite bookstore in all of New York hanging in the window one day when he passed by. It wasn’t a well known one--definitely not one the tourists flocked to--and it drew him in. He nodded politely at the dark-haired woman sitting at the desk at the back of the small space and began taking in the rest of what he discovered was a show. An entire show of small, old bookshops of New York. Familiar interiors popped out at him and he was so engrossed he nearly missed that the woman had walked up beside him. 

“Hi, I’m Helen.” She said. “Happy to answer any questions about the pieces.”

“These are all yours.” He said bluntly, turning his gaze from the photograph to the woman next to him.

“They’re beautiful.”

“Thank you.” She said with a gracious smile. 

“Has the one in the front window sold yet?” He asked almost shyly.

She was having a hard time getting a read on him. His imposing and very serious appearance didn’t quite match up with how he was talking to her. 

“No, it’s still available.”

“I’ll take it.” He rushed out. “I really like that place.” He added with a fleeting smile. She decided she liked his smile. 

Helen nodded. “It’s a favourite of mine too.” 

“The show will be up for another few weeks but I can arrange shipping when it’s over if that works for you?” 

“I can come by and pick it up. It’s for my studio. Just down the street.” John wasn’t sure why he was sharing so much with her. It caught him off guard. 

“You’re an artist?” 

“No. No--I bind and restore books.” She noticed how his cheeks reddened slightly as he talked.

“That’s an art of sorts.” She added.

From that day on he’d always make sure to walk by the gallery and check if she was there. Sometimes he’d stop in and other times he’d just wave if she caught his eye. Talking to her was easy--too easy. He found himself sharing things about his life he’d never told anyone else. She found herself doing the same. He was someone she felt she could trust. Even though some of the things he told her didn’t exactly add up--like what it was that he did that kept him living in a boutique hotel and in those bespoke suits he seemed to always be wearing.  Then again, it was New York. She chalked it up to old money--but that didn’t quite seem to fit either. 

A few months had gone by and one day on his way to his studio he saw her, red-faced and dishevelled, hauling boxes out to the curb. She was always so calm and elegantly put together.

“Hi Helen.” He said slowing down as he got closer to her.

“Oh, hey John.” She said, straightening up and swiping the back of her wrist across her forehead. Her hair was tied back in a messy bun and she looked like she’d been crying.

“Is everything ok?” He asked cautiously.

“Yeah...I’m.” she interrupted herself with a rueful laugh. “Why am I lying? No, everything isn’t ok.” She said, shaking her head. “A pipe burst in the gallery and I lost almost all of my portfolios and a good number of pieces too.” 

“Jesus. Helen. I’m so sorry. Can I help?” He asked.

“No, that was the last of the stuff that has to go. I’m just about to lock up and go home to sort out the insurance.” She said quietly. “But--thank you for asking John. That’s very kind of you.” 

He nodded. “I’m just down the street if you change your mind, alright?” 

She reached out and gently squeezed his arm just above the elbow. She appreciated his offer but appreciated even more than he didn’t press her further.  

“I know. Thanks, John.” She couldn’t be bothered to hide her upset behind a smile and that didn’t seem to bother him at all. He didn’t rush to fix things or push her to explain further. He just accepted her words and actions. He’d been on her mind a lot lately but as she locked up and turned to see him walking down the street to his studio, book in hand she realized those jagged and unpolished feelings she had about him had been polished and smoothed into something multifaceted and dazzling. 

John waited out of sight until she made her way past him before he circled back to the gallery and began digging through the boxes of water damaged portfolios and prints. When he’d set aside a sizable collection of them he gathered them up and brought them to his studio. It was slow and painstaking work but he’d managed to save enough of them to bind together. He settled on arranging them chronologically--figuring they were mostly portfolio works and even though he knew quite a bit about her and her work by that point--he didn’t want to make assumptions. 

In the months that passed by Helen only became more confused by her whatever they had going with John. They’d grab take out and share wine at her gallery. He’d finally invited her to his studio and showed her what he was working on--it meant a lot to her to see her art hanging on his wall right above his main workbench. It seemed like they’d flirt back and forth--yet John always acted like he was hesitant to move beyond what they had. Awkward pauses, a gentle but featherlight hand on her lower back when he’d open a door for her, a hesitation when they’d say goodnight. It was like neither one of them wanted to make that leap--despite both of them being decisive people. 

John could be very obtuse but he wasn’t completely in the dark about how she felt about him. The more time they spent together the more it was written all over her face. He felt the same way--he’d never wanted anyone in the way he wanted her--but he needed out first. Something he’d wanted for a long time but not something he’d ever been motivated enough to try for. Until her.

He’d let her know he had to go away on business and that he’d be away for a few weeks. They’d toasted to new business ventures--she had no idea what that meant exactly--and promised he’d be back as soon as he could with a gentle kiss pressed to her cheek.

Three weeks to the day later Helen was delighted to see him. A little dismayed at the limp he now had. A skiing accident perhaps? She was certain he’d tell her all about it over the bottle of wine he had tucked under one arm. She took the offered bottle and kissed him on the cheek. Noting wordlessly the ghost of a bruise along his cheekbone. 

“I’m glad you’re back!” She said excitedly. 

“Me too.” He said, clearing his throat. “This is..ah, this is for you.” 

He passed the large leatherbound book he was holding to her. 

Her name was embossed on the cover in tasteful gold lettering.

“What is…” She said as she flipped it open carefully.

John’s face was the darkest red she’d ever seen it. He seemed genuinely flustered as she paged through the works he’d clearly spent so much time and care in saving. 

“John, you--this--oh my god.” 

“You looked so upset that day. I wanted--”

She cut him off mid sentence sandwiching the book between them and pulling him in for a kiss so filled with longing and passion that when she pulled back John was completely breathless.

“I--wow--was that--o”

John wound his arm around her back and pulled her tightly against him, his lips pressing against hers, teasing her lower lip gently with his teeth, not letting her finish that sentence.  It was more than ok. They’d be more than ok. 

“John. Nail please.” 

“JOHN!” 

“Hmm? Oh!” He said with a chuckle--snapping out of his thoughts.

“Daydreaming on the job, huh?” Helen asked with a raised brow with her hand out, waiting for a nail.

“I was thinking about you, actually.” He said grinning as he held out a nail for her to take.

She dropped her head and laughed quietly.

“I love you John. So much.” 

“As much as I love you, Hels.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Happy Happy Holidays and hope all of you are safe and healthy and happy. This fandom has been such a gift in these really difficult times and I hope this story brings you a little bit of comfort and joy. 

[rekrappeter]

Moments || s.r

pairing: spencer reid x ssa!reader 

warnings: child abduction case | swearing maybe ?? | lmk if I have missed anything ♡

word count: 2.4k

a/n: this is my first one-shot involving any members of criminal minds. i have slowly fallen down the rabbit hole of being complete obsessed with spencer reid hence the reason for this new tumblr. lmk if you have any recommendations of other writing pages/criminal minds pages! Also if you have any requests, hit me up♡

This was the moment that you dreaded. The moment after you had the chance to clean yourself up; after you made a nutritional meal; after you made a cup of tea in your favorite mug and after you decided on a movie to spend the night watching. It was the same routine, the only differential factor was the case that happened before it. It was the moment that you were able to take a deep breath and look around your empty apartment, and each time, the sudden feeling of dread suffocated you. 

It was the moment that you used to look forward to but years had past and despite loving your job and the people you worked with, realization dawned on you that it had started taking a toll on your social life. You couldn’t even recall the last time you went out on a date. Was it two years ago or more? Every time you got back from a case, you slowly started falling into a state of loneliness and your mind would keep you preoccupied with the thoughts of never finding someone to love you. 

You stared at the steaming tea in the mug, watching it dance through the air and you felt your eyes starting to tear up with the heavy thoughts in your head. Sighing, you stood up and placed the cup on the coffee table. “That’s enough now..” You mumbled to yourself, grabbing your phone and opening the app store. You flickered through the multiple dating apps that were available, your mind boggled by the amount of them and just as you agreed to install one, your phone buzzed in your grasp.

Hotchner: We have a new case. 

A sigh of relief escaped your lips and you suddenly forgot about the dating app that was installing itself into your phone. Another routine that you were too accustomed to was changing from your loungewear to something more appropriate for work and grabbing your travel bag in less than ten minutes before you were out the door on the way to your second home. 

As you walked into the bullpen, you spotted each member of your team, and a feeling of security flooded over you. “Ah, there you are.” Derek grinned, dressed in a leather jacket and fitted jeans, as he leaned against your allocated desk. 

“Missing me already?” You teased. You could tell that the spark in your smile didn’t reach your eyes but you had to try your hardest to hide your negative thoughts in a room full of profilers. You placed your bag underneath the desk by Derek’s feet and he reached an arm out for a side hug.

“You ok?” He whispered, making it look as if he just kissed the side of your head. 

You knew you couldn’t trust your voice so you just responded by nodding at him, returning the friendly gesture. Derek was your closest friend in the BAU, you enjoyed his energy and could tell there was more to him than just pretty looks and a funny demeanor. Your attention was pulled away from him when Hotchner walked into the room, his confidence stride going towards the conference room. “Let’s go.” 

Garcia debriefed everyone on the active case that we were going to cover and the moment you heard the words child abduction, you sucked in a deep breath. They were always the ones that had the biggest impact on you and it took a while for you to recover from them, depending on the outcome. As you looked around at the team, you noticed that everyone looked exhausted from the previous case you had just closed; you caught Spencer’s glance and returned the empathic smile that he gave you. 

“Wheels up in ten, we’re already four hours behind. We can rest on the jet.” Aaron said before everyone fleeted from the office. 

Over the course of the next few hours, you slowly started to feel yourself slipping away from being hopeful that you were going to find this child. Two other children have gone missing from the area within the past six months and they still haven’t been found. You sat on a chair, your eyes scanning the information board over and over; there had to be something someone missed. Three young boys stared back at you, and time was ticking away. 

A knock on the door pulled your attention away from them and you looked at the door, seeing Spencer there. “Sorry, I didn’t want to startle you.” 

You stood up from the chair, shaking your head and fixing your shirt. “No, no, it’s okay. I should actually be out there. Just thought I might see something different.” You forced out a chuckle when you realized it was Spencer that was in charge of this board. Of course, if he couldn’t see anything, you wouldn’t be able to. 

“How are you holding up?” Spencer asked, walking into the room and taking his rightful place at the board. Spencer had noticed how you were more reluctant to leave the offices at night; how you were always trying to hold onto that last conversation. He could see that empty look in your eyes in the morning, noticing how your cheerful demeanor would come out after you spoke with people. 

“I’m okay, Dr. Reid.” You teased gently, watching the light blush flutter across his cheek. “It’s just... cases like these are tough, especially when we have three missing boys and no leads. It just seems all too strange….” 

Spencer listened to you rant on about the case, watching you sigh in frustration and he admired the way you spoke with your hands. He wanted to ask how you were feeling despite the case, he wanted you to open up to him like you do with Derek and JJ but he just couldn’t get past that wall. He wasn’t too sure if it was him or you that kept rebuilding the wall between you, was he afraid to admit that he has slowly started to fall for a colleague… again? 

“That’s it.” You whispered, rushing over to where Spencer was standing and examining the photo of the second child that went missing. “When I went to speak with Mark’s parents, they had a photograph on the wall and his father was wearing this exact shirt, it’s from a boy scouts association.” 

“Do you think it was his father?” Spencer questioned, trying not to get distracted by the fact that you were centimeters from him. He could smell the lingering scent of your shampoo and he could almost feel your heart racing. 

“N-no, I don’t think so. If you look at the photo, you can see that the shirt is too big for it to be his. What if someone had some kind of grudge…”

“Over the fathers and his way to get even is to take their sons.” Spencer finished your sentence. 

You looked up at him, his body closer to yours and you felt your skin getting red. “It could be a long shot but it could also be worth it.” You mumbled quietly, very aware that Spencer hasn’t made any objections to you standing this close to him. You took your phone out to call Garcia, and inwardly groaned when you unlocked it and Tinder was the page that was exposed. Glancing at Spencer, his face looked defeated and he took a step back from you. You couldn’t understand why regret and panic swept over you, and you started blabbering excuses out to him. 

“Don’t worry about it, Y/N. Your secret is safe with me.” Spencer chuckled softly before he turned his back to you and you could see him running his fingers through his hair. When you got through to Garcia, you explained your theory to her but your mind was distracted by the tousled brown-haired man in front of you. As you waited on the line for Garcia���s confirmation or rejection of your theory, your eyes kept glancing at Spencer. You so badly wanted to be able to explain to him that you haven’t even been on the dating app, that it was a moment of weakness on your behalf. 

“Y/N Y/L/N, if you were here right now, I would kiss you! I’m going to call Hotch, I’ll send the address your way.” You released a sigh of relief when she hung up, and you smiled at Spencer. 

Spencer returned the smile, “Who’s the genius now?” 

“Come on, let’s go get ‘em.” You retorted, ensuring that you had your gun and left the precinct with Reid hot on your heels. The hope was finally started to come back. 

It was always good closing cases that had a happy ending but unfortunately, not all of them ended like the one today. But you were going to take advantage of the blissful feeling that you were feeling while it lasted. You were back at Quantico now, filling out the last of the paperwork. It was just past eleven in the evening and you had said goodbye to the team merely two hours ago. On your way to the storage room, a light caught your eye in one of the conferences room. 

Peeking through the half-open blinds, your stomach twisted when you spotted Spencer there, flicking through an unknown file. The feeling was strange, it was as if you had the sudden urge to want to go talk to him and there was no doubt that he has been on your mind the last few hours. You knocked on the door, opening it and leaning on the doorframe. “What are you still doing here?” You smiled, and when he lifted his head, his hair danced around his face. 

“I-just catching up on some research,” Spencer replied, placing the chart on the table in front of him. But the truth was, Spencer just picked some random file to read so that he had a reason to make sure you weren’t going to stay here all night by yourself. “What has you here?” 

You shrugged your shoulders gently, walking further into the room. Nibbling on your cheek, you wanted to open up to Spencer but you didn’t want to bore him with details of your life that he had no interest in. Before you could reply though, Spencer started talking again. “When I asked you earlier about how you were feeling, I didn’t mean at that moment. I couldn’t help but... but notice that you have been acting strange recently, it’s as if your mind is always elsewhere and you’re always the last person here. Is everything okay at home?” 

You couldn’t hide the shocked look on your face but you knew someone was going to pick up on it eventually. Spencer was the last on your list though that you’d expect to notice unless he has been watching you. And what would that mean if he was? Did he like you more than what you thought he did? “I-I… Spence, I don’t know how to explain it.”

“You feel as if your whole life has been dominated by this job? That it’s not giving you a chance to live how you would like? That you might end up being alone because of how intense this job is?” Spencer spoke softly, as if he knew exactly what he was talking about. 

You shook your head, a light smile on your face and you scoffed in disbelief. “Exactly like that. That no matter how much I give to this job, I’m not getting anything back from it. I could agree to go on a date with someone, but I could never be 100% sure because at the last minute, I might have to leave for a case. No one would understand that.” You sighed, leaning against the table.

“I would.” Spencer whispered, and you whipped your head to look at him, noting how he was suddenly avoiding eye contact with you. 

“What?” You asked, your heart beating against your chest. 

Spencer looked around frantically before standing up from the chair, “Noth-Nothing, it doesn’t matter. Do you want me to walk you home?” He asked, his beautiful brown eyes avoiding yours still. You stood straight and walked over to where he was, his adam’s apple gulping.

You reached your hand to rest on his cheek, testing the waters at first. He didn’t flinch away as you expected, instead his eyes flickered closed for a moment and he rested into your touch. This was a moment that you could get used to; you watched his all the worries left his features and when his eyes opened, they were soft and swirling with unexplained motions. “Can I try something?” You asked quietly, not wanting to make any sudden movements. He nodded slowly, and his eyes widen slightly as he watched you move closer. 

“Are you sure?” Spencer whispered, knowing that what is about to happen is something that you can’t take back. 

“Yes.” You replied, closing the gap between yours and Spencer’s lips. The kiss was hesitant at first, neither of you wanting to scare the other away. His lips were soft, but as second passed, his confidence built and he wrapped his arms around you slowly, pulling you to him. Your lips moved in sync, savoring every moment and broken touch. Your fingers swam through his hair and your heart felt as if it wanted to explode with happiness. An emotion you haven’t felt in so long. 

When Spencer pulled away, your eyes remained shut for a second wanting to remember every moment of it. You wanted to replay the kiss over and over again. His breathing was heavy and the air was fawning your face. “I have wanted to kiss you for so long.” He broke the silence, and your eyes connected with his. 

“Really?”

“Really.” He whispered, leaning in to peck your lips again. 

“What took you so long?” You asked. 

“It was never the right moment.”

           🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻

please please please let me know what you thought of this! It’s my first s.r fic so I would love some feedback! also I have 0 followers, follow me and I’ll follow you back! <3

[stereksecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, foolishsel!

For @foolishsel. I enjoyed writing this fic for you and I hope it meets all of your Sterek likes (: Merry Christmas!! -your S.S>

Read On AO3

️*****

Christmas at the Loft

The pack was sitting around the loft, everyone’s eyes on Derek. They were waiting for him to decide-it was all up to him.

His boyfriend nudged him from his spot beside him, “Come on Der, if you don’t play someone else has to sit out.” Stiles got that look in his eye, the one he usually got right before he began begging.  

Derek glared around the room. “Is this really going to break Christmas if I don’t agree?” The pack all chimed in at once, “YES!”  

He sighed heavily, still not wanting to give in. Stiles eyes met his. “Oh, come on babe, don’t be such a sour-grinch-wolf.” Derek’s brow raised and a smirk touched his face. “You just come up with that one?” The brown eyed boy shrugged his shoulders. Derek chuckled his direction, “You’re so proud of yourself right now, aren’t you?” Stiles winked at him flirtatiously. Almost at the same time they realized they weren’t alone, and turned back to the group. Derek gave them all the answer they’d been looking for. “Fine. How does this Secret Santa shit work anyway?”

The pack whooped and hollered in their victory as Lydia set out to make up name cards.  

“Everyone fills out a sheet and puts it in this bag, then we all draw a name. Remember it’s a secret.” Lydia glared at Stiles for that last part; he feigned shock. “What?”

Everyone took a piece of paper with a matching red or green pen, Lydia made everything festive, and went to work writing down their likes and dislikes.  Derek hadn’t a clue how to answer half the questions. What was his favorite restaurant? Favorite store? How would he know; not like he had time to stroll the town what with all the creatures that came to Beacon Hills threating to kill them and such.  

He ended up skipping some altogether or answered, ‘I don’t.’ The weirdest question was ‘what is your favorite scent?’ The only thing he could come up with was Stiles. He’d memorized his fresh laundry smell mixed with mint, and that hint of Stiles anxiety-his scent was home.  

Derek finished filling out the form, handing it back to Lydia; he felt sorry for whoever picked his name. They all agreed Lydia would keep hold of the master list as she was the only one who could be trusted not to lose it; they only hoped she wrote their names and not some cryptic code -it happened more often than not.  

Lydia came around with the bag for everyone to draw a name, writing down who each person drew as she went. Stiles seemed happy about his pick. “Oh, this is going to be so easy!” Derek figured he got his best friend Scott whom he’d known practically his whole life. Lucky bastard.

Once it was Derek’s turn, he pulled out the last name hoping for someone easy like Isaac-he could just get him a stupid scarf. He reached his hand in the bag timidly, pulling out the last name, the one he’d hoped to avoid-Stiles. As if it being their first Christmas as a couple wasn’t enough, now Derek had to find him not one, but two amazing gifts. The only thing he’d come up with so far was some string and markers for his ‘who done it board’, though he was afraid Stiles might find a different activity for those items.  

Once all the others had piled out of the loft, Derek and Stiles were left alone at last. Derek lunged for Stiles, but he squirmed out of his grip quickly. Damn wiry thing he was!  

“Oh no you don’t my sexy werewolf! We only have a few days to shop for these gifts and I’m guessing you could use all the time you can get.” Derek flipped him off, moving quicker this time and pinned him to the wall. “How about I give you a gift right now?” Derek raised his brows in challenge, Stiles pecked him on the lips. “Maybe later babe.” Derek let him slide away, for now.  

He moved to the couch and laid back, hoping an idea for Stiles would spring to life. It didn’t, but it’s was the thought that counted-right?

~

Derek spent almost the entirety of the next few day searching high and low for anything he could give Stiles, but always came up empty. What does one buy a neurotic teenager who cares more about people than things?  

Christmas was two days away which meant Christmas eve was tomorrow night, and that was the day they were exchanging Secret Santa gifts.  

The cool air fogged up around the werewolf as he puffed out heavy breaths. He could hear Stile’s heart beating semi rapidly as he approached the door, but not for the reasons he was thinking. Christmas music was blaring when he opened the door and he took in the sight in front of him. Lights were strung up everywhere around the loft: rainbow colored ones, classic gold, snowflakes, and ones that looked like dripping icicles. There was a massive Christmas tree in the middle of the floor, complete with more lights and ornaments that surrounded them. Stiles was pacing around the loft setting up miscellaneous decorations here and there, not noticing that his boyfriend had walked in.  

Derek growled low in his throat, flashing his blue eyes. Stiles turned to see the noise. “Ahhh!”  

He dropped the décor he had in his hands, ornaments clanging to the floor. “Jesus Derek, what did I tell you about sneaking up on me?” Derek flared his blues once more. “Probably the same thing I told you about decorating this place.” Ignoring his broodiness, Stiles strode over to him and Derek wrapped his arms around him from behind, resting his chin on Stiles shoulder.  

“See now my sour-wolf, isn’t it a beauty?” Derek smiled into Stiles neck, trying to see everything through his eyes. He bent to kiss him along his jaw, sending shivers down Stiles arm. Derek whispered low in his ear, “The view’s not so bad I guess.” Stiles practically melted under him. “Ok Christmas later. You, me, bed, NOW!”  

They chased each other around the loft until they were pinning one another to the bed, kissing each other fervently. Falling asleep with Stiles tucked safely in his arms that night, Derek finally knew what he was going to get him, but he was going to need some help.  

~

Derek was up and out of the cozy-lit loft early the next morning, kissing Stiles on his forehead before heading out. He wanted to crawl back into bed and warm his boyfriend, but it would be selfish of him; he had gifts to get together by tonight.  

On the way to his car, he stopped at Stiles jeep to grab an item he would need for part of the present, then he was on his way.  

He stopped at the store first, knowing none of his pack would be awake this early. The craft store was lined with paper, stickers, paints, and all sorts of things Derek had never envisioned in his lifetime. He stood out like a sore thumb with his brooding looks and leather jacket. One of the workers eventually came to his rescue, helping him gather all of the supplies he would need: paper, glue, stickers, and a large box of sharpie markers. His next stop was Lydia’s house; she would know how to help him start the project and put it all together.  

Once at Lydia’s place, he showed her the materials he’d gotten, laying out his plan for the gift. Lydia was left speechless; she stared at him in awe. Derek rubbed a hand through his hair, “Oh god. This is a stupid idea isn’t it?” Shaking herself out of her trance, Lydia placed a palm on his forearm. “Not at all. He’s going to love it!” She gave him a reassuring smile and he could see the glimmer of moisture in her eyes.  

Lydia helped him set everything up, arranging the pages just so. Once the book was put together, Lydia created her page and sent Derek on his way to his next stop-Scott’s. Derek gave Scott the same spiel and was met with almost the same response as Lydia. Derek glared at him, “What?” Scott looked up at Derek’s glowing eyes, “Whoa, whoa! It’s a good idea…great idea! He’ll love it!” Derek growled slightly at him, but let him finish his part in peace.  

Derek continued to make his way through the rest of his pack, skipping the ones who were out of town for the holidays. By the time he was done, he had a page from everyone: Scott, Lydia, Allison, Malia, and even Isaac-he knew Stiles secretly loved having him around.

Derek finished it off, putting everyone’s pages together, adding his own at the end. Stiles texted to let him know he’d be home in an hour or so, which gave him just enough time to grab the tools he needed to finish the other part of Stiles present. He finished the second gift in no time, leaving him a few extra minutes to change before everyone arrived.

~

The loft was filled once again with his pack, all of them wearing some kind of festive sweater or headband thing, Derek opted for his usual t-shirt and jeans combo, only slightly snarling when Stiles put a jingle bell necklace over his head. “It’s so you can’t sneak up on me anymore my love.” Stiles winked at him and Derek pulled him closer.

The gift exchange was going well and the pack was finally able to relax from the luring creatures of Beacon Hills. Stiles had gotten Scott after all, gifting him with new lacrosse gear and date-night activities for him and Alison. How cute; Derek rolled his eyes.

Isaac handed Derek a small gift box, looking away nervously-the rest of his pack shrugged their shoulders. Derek eyed the box cautiously, opening it slowly to reveal a dark green-scarf? Derek didn’t get the chance to say anything as Stiles was already on a tirade.  

“Oh, I don’t think so Lahey! You’re not going to push your stupid scarf fetish on MY boyfriend. No sir!” Derek let him get it all out, eventually grabbing him by the elbows to pull him back down to the couch. The rest of the pack snickered to themselves, Isaac looked ready to vomit.

Derek bent to Stiles, trying to whisper quiet enough that the others intensified hearing wouldn’t pick it up, but loud enough that Stiles human ears would. “You know, I have a few ideas of what we could do with that scarf.” Stiles gulped loudly, looking around at the others also hoping they hadn’t heard. No one seemed to notice and the gift exchanging continued.

The time had finally come to hand Stiles his gift. Derek picked up the present and gently placed it in Stiles lap. Stiles looked up at him with a wide grin spread across his face. Derek watched Stiles take the top off the box and delicately pull out the book. Stiles began flipping through the pages completely mesmerized. Each of their friends had found their favorite picture of them with Stiles and wrote a little story about their friendship to go with it.  

Stiles looked around the room, moisture flecked in the corners of his eyes. “You guys did this-for me?” “We love you Stiles!” The pack tackle-hugged him, brining Derek down with them. Stiles looked up at Derek knowingly, thanking him in their unspoken language.  

With the gifts all opened, Derek sat back watching his pack pile food on their plates, gathering around the Christmas tree; it was a calming sight to see. They stayed through most of the night, the loft filled with music and banter among them.

Later, after everyone had left, Derek and Stiles were curled up on the couch together listening to the fire crackle while the lights danced on the walls. The clock struck midnight and Stiles jumped out of Derek’s strong arms. “Merry Christmas!!” Stiles looked like a kid on-well Christmas. Derek chuckled softly, “You’re such a dork.” Stiles grinned at him, “Yes, but I’m your dork.” Derek rolled his eyes playfully, standing from the couch. He went to the tree and reached under it until he found the package he was looking for. Derek went back to the couch where Stiles now sat with his book from earlier. It was sprawled across his lap, opened to Derek’s page. The picture was of them back when they were ‘just friends’, not that they every really were. They both had tooth-grinning smiles plastered on their faces; Derek knew it was one of Stiles favorites. The writing under it read: ‘Even when we weren’t together, we were. You’ve always been my best friend Stiles. I couldn’t do any of this without your crazy antics. Love you, D.’

Stiles beamed from beside him, tears in his eyes. Derek brought him closer, placing small kisses on his head. He slid the other present onto Stiles lap. “Open it.” Stiles pulled away slightly so he could look him in the eye. “More?” He held up the photo book, “This wasn’t enough?!” Derek laughed, pushing the present closer to him, “Nope.” Stiles sighed dramatically though Derek could hear his heart beating with excitement.

Stiles first glance at the present was puzzlement until Derek told him to turn it over. It was Stiles bat, his prized weapon of choice. Derek had polished it up and engraved it with Stiles initials and the spiral that matched his tattoo. Underneath those were the words: ‘When I can’t protect you, this will.’

Stiles was fully into his emotions now, burying himself into Derek. When the tears settled, Derek asked him, “So, did I do ok?” Stiles looked him dead in the eye. “Ok? I-I” Derek howled with laughter. “Wait did I actually leave Stiles Stilinski speechless?” He faked shock and Stiles swatted him slightly. They fell into each other’s arms again, Stiles nestled up closely to him.  

“You know, this might be the best Christmas I’ve ever had.” His boyfriend eyed him suspiciously, “You haven’t even opened any presents yet!” Derek kissed him on the forehead, rubbing his hands over Stiles soft skin. “I already have the best one.” Stiles turned around to face him, finding Derek’s lips with ease as they kissed each other tenderly.  

Pulling away slightly, Stiles asked, “You meant the scarf, right?” Both of them burst into laughter.  

They fell asleep in each other’s arms, wrapped up like gifts. Christmas wasn’t so bad after all Derek thought. He could get used to this; in fact, he already had.  

[blaiddlleuad]

Just never learnt ok? - wolfstar

The common room was deserted. Every student enjoying the last of the summer rays that shone brightly through the grounds of Hogwarts before having to board the train home for the holidays.

All except one of course.

Remus Lupin sat tucked away in the tightest most cosiest corner of the common room, eyes squinting in the dim light trying to read the last pages of his book. He didn't hear when a pair of footsteps came stumbling in and jumped at hearing his name. Cursing when he hit his head against the wall behind him.

"What you doing in there? Been looking for you. " Sirius Black stood proudly, beautiful black locks falling perfectly on his shoulders, stormy grey eyes with a sharp jawline to compliment the natural beauty that came with him.

Sirius was also tanned and Remus wondered if the boy had ever had an imperfection, it looked like the answer was no due to the fact that Sirius Black always looked devilishly handsome, even when he'd been up all night setting up a prank with James.

"Just reading, you knew that. I told you." Remus replied.

"Well come out of there, I wanna show you something."

"What?"

"It's a surprise, come on Lupin. Can't waste any more time!" Sirius was practically jumping with joy and excitement, he pulled Remus out of the tight spot and hauled him up on his feet.

Remus staggered a great 4 inches taller then Sirius's 5ft 6 but he somehow made it seem like he was the shorter one, hunching his back and slouching was much more comfortable than a straight back and a posture like a plank of wood. Sirius on the other hand made sure to rise above others in the sense of being bigger. Broad shoulders and muscles, chin up and fitted clothes to accentuate his even more perfect figure.

Remus could just die at one look at him.

"Oh alright. Lead me the way." Remus said, letting Sirius take his hand and guiding him out to the massive doors that opened up to reveal the large assembly of students situated along the lawn. Sitting down and laughing with friends. Taking in the summer sun, some students had even taken to having a dip in the lake.

Sirius continued to walk with Remus behind him until they got to the forbidden forests clearing. Out of site of the others.

"Uh pads, what we doing here?"

"It's in there."

"What is?"

"You'll just have to wait and see, come along now moony. Got no time to waste!" Sirius grinned and Remus melted more.

His and Sirius relationship was a secret between him, the other marauders, Lily and Marlene. They'd gotten together at the start of 6th year when a prank had backfired and Sirius was not able to lie for a good proportion of the day, ending up in him confessing his secrets to Remus when the two ended up alone.

Remus, thank god, recipicated these feelings and both decided to work out how to be together. Obviously this had done a excilant job and now were still wrapped around each others fingers after 7 months.

The forest was different in the day time then it was when the full moon was out and the night sky drew shadows under trees and bushes, hiding the other creatures the roamed.

The sun filtered down through the branches, birds flew up above and sang songs of sweet harmony's, rabbits hopped away and spiders span webs as the boys made a their way steadily.

"How long?"

"Not yet but soon."

A few minutes later a clearing opened and the sound of water made its way to Remus's ears. Frogs croaked and fish swam as ripples formed on the layer of blue that sparkled. A water fall in the far end covered a cave on the far side of the bank and Remus stood mesmerized by the site. With years of running around this place he's never seen this before.

"Just stumbled across it couple of day ago."

"It's, wow."

Sirius finally and reluctantly let go of Remus's hand and began to take his shoes and socks off before taking his shirt off too.

"W-what you doing?" Remus asked

"Going for a swim. You are too, now take your clothes off, just keep your pants on." Sirius smirked.

"I- what? No, Im ok."

"Oh come on, it's lovely in the water. Not cold and not too warm."

"It's not that, I just um, I er, don't like it."

"Don't like what? The water?" Sirius had now turned to watch Remus stand awkwardly off to the side, ringing his hands and gulping deeply. He looked back to the small lake and it suddenly clicked in his brain.

"Did you ever learn to swim?" He asked walking forward and taking on of Remus's hands in his.

"I, er, um, I guess not." Remus whispered looking everywhere but Sirius's eyes.

"Ok, I'm going to teach you then."

"What? Sirius no. It's ok, really I'm fine. I'll just sit on the bank."

"Don't be silly, it'll be fun. You'll love it."

Sirius waited sitting on the bank with his legs dangling in the water, splashing the fish that dared to come close to him. Remus carefully took of his clothes. Sirius has seen him a many times before; scarred and bruised, a widening pattern of lost memories and tortured turnings. He hated how he looked, opting to hide under large jumpers that were strayed at the cuffs.

But Sirius didn't hate them. He didn't like them as such because of how they happened but that didn't stop him from staring lovingly at the boy with freckles painting his face, soft blonde curls bouncing with every laugh, a hue of amber eyes escaping in the never ending land of dreams from the books that have stayed by his side.

Sirius loved the toothy grin he got, loved the hugs that held the warmth in and the terror out, love the subtle glances of adoration, loved how he could listen to an endless rant of nothing and everything. To put in short Sirius really did love Remus.

"Ok, so how you doing this?"

Sirius floated next to the bank, arms either side of Remus's legs.

"Just hold on, ok?"

"Mmm"

"It'll be ok, trust me."

"Mmm"

Sirius held firmly onto Remus's sides and lowered him into the water. Remus took a sharp breath in and closed his eyes but he trusted Sirius with everything he had left in him and let him continue to lead the way.

Has Sirius did say, the water was just right. Even with that Remus was shaking.

It wasn't like he's never gone swimming before. He'd been down the river has a child but after he was bitten his mother and father forbade him from doing anything that could harm him more than a werewolf could once a month. Since then he's not been exactly scared of water he just doesn't know what to expect. The feat of his parents had transpired to Remus and it's harder than previously thought to shake away that fear.

Remus had somehow been convinced to lay starfish on his back, staring up at the blue patched sky. Sirius was to one side, arms under his back holding him up.

"Nice isn't it?" Sirius asked

"Mmm."

"All you can say?"

"Mmm."

"Alright then, wanna try this one your own"

Remus blinked and shook his head as much a she could without swallowing some of the water.

"No, no I'm good. Stay like this."

"Aw don't be like that, just like having a bath."

"Might be useful if I had one."

Sirius was taken back. He tried to remember all the the times Remus had had a bath but none came to mind. Had he really never had one?

"You're kidding?"

"No, mum was scared I'd drown or something."

"Well nows a better time then ever to try."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Before Remus could get an answer, Sirius had begun to slowly drop his hands from supporting his back. Remus layed still and stiff, he didn't like the feeling of being alone in the water. He closed his eyes and wished it all away, pretending he was elsewhere. Reading a book on dry land, cozied up by the fireplace with a hot chocolate floating near by ready for when he needed to take a sip.

That moment didn't last long as a wave of panic rushed through him. What if his mother's fears came true? What if he drowned? What if Sirius had just left him? What if this was some cruel prank to torment with his fears to get a good laugh?

"P-pads? Y-you still there?"

"Yes, yes I'm still here. You doing great moony." Sirius brought his hand our the water and begun to sooth Remus, stroking his head and pushing his wet locks out the way.

"I don't like it anymore." He whispered

"Ok, let's go to the bank." Sirius had let Remus lach onto him. He was still on his back but his hands were gripping Sirius's arms like never before.

Remus didn't realize how far they had gone out until he opened his eyes and saw that they weren't close enough to the bank that he could get out.

"Sirius, whyd you let us get so far out?" Remus whispered again, he didn't trust himself to go any louder.

"Sorry, just did. Not that big anyways."

Sirius pried of Remus's hands off and Remus clung to the bank for dear life.

"See? Wasn't that bad?"

"Could've have been better. You didn't have to let go!"

"Sorry didn't think that you'd be so frightened by it. Look if it makes you feel any better, we'll go get ice-creams after this, yeah?"

"Ok."

Remus pressed his back against the bank, finding a ledge to put his feet on so he could stand. Sirius brought his hands to hold Remus's face, cupping his cheeks. Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius's waist and brought him close so there bodies were touching. Gently they met lips, slow and passionate.

The two had managed to climb out and layed on their backs, side by side. Hands intwined together and heads touching. Watching the trees above them and the birds flying past. They stayed in silence and they listened to the nature around them. Ice creams forgetton about.