#conman deh

[overdosemaxxer]

Nice shirt jare hey who's that guy with you is he okay

[im-not-a-l0ser]

Guys, cmon. Just. Hear me out here.

Connor Murphy with many rings. At least four combined. Cmon just consider it.

[homo-phoneic]

Euthanasia by Will Wood but Kleinphy

[connerstonermurphy]

Ships I'll do:

Conguel,treebros,Galaxygals,Kleinsen,

Conman,Kleinsenconman

Ships I won't do

Conner x Zoe,Zoevan,Alana x Evan,Alana x any man in deh,Zoe x any man in deh,Conner x any women in Deh

Also in my Au Evan has a Twin Sister so I will roleplay her sometimes, Her name is Charlie Hansen,Her and Evan were born on the same day at the same time

[deh-essays]

So here's the Kleinphy Actor Dynamic Masterpost, feel free to add any that I missed or any additions

[nightcorecarseatheadrest]

They meow at you in the halls wyd

[asktheinsanelycooljaredkleinman]

aLANAAA GIVE HIM BACK HIS PHO N E

[tlhrfanfic]

Okay so. Its been literally years since I've been in the DEH Fandom but like...but I've been wanting to write some Tree Bros and Sincerely Three and Kleinsen and maybe some Conman (i think that the Connor and Jared ship name right??)

I've got a plot i had when I was still in that I want to do again. You all in the Fandom still want to hear about it? It's Tree Bros. Lmk. I'll write up a plot sheet and you all can tell me if you wanna read.

Secondly, in the future I plan to ask for some cute fluff ideas (Canon divergent and AU ideas) just to get back in. Is that something you'd all be interested in?

Lmk.

[takemebacktowheniwassane]

Oh, Incorrect Quotes Generator

-

Alana: Anyone d-

Connor: Depressed?

Jared: Drained?

Evan: Dumb?

Alana: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people...

-

This one's a bit more?? Um?? Non-kid friendly TTvTT

Zoe: Guys, is having a penis fun?

Connor: It has its ups and downs.

Evan: It's gets a little hard sometimes.

Jared: IT'S A PAIN IN THE ASS!

Zoe: Jesus fuck, you guys.

-

Evan: You're a loose cannon, Jared.

Jared: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon, maybe. But a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Alana: I think you play by your own rules.

Zoe: No way, he thinks rules were meant to be broken.

Evan: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Jared: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Connor is the real loose cannon.

Connor: *Smashes a chair*

-

Evan, trying to convince Connor to join the group: You know... I just thought it'd be good to have someone to come along who's... strong!

Alana: And loud!

Zoe: And grumpy!

Jared: And oblivious to reality!

Connor:

-

Alana: What did you guys get in your yearbooks?

Zoe: 'Prettiest smile!' :)

Evan: 'Nicest personality!' :)

Jared: 'Most likely to start a bar fight.'

Connor: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one.'

-

Zoe: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one!

Evan: Tubular AF!

Alana: Mood to the max!

Connor, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it.

Jared, just as annoyed: If she breathes she's a square.

-

Evan: You KIDNAPPED Connor?! That's illegal!!

Jared: But Evan, what's more illegal? Briefly inconveniencing Connor, or destroying our dreams?

Evan: Kidnapping Connor, Jared!!

Zoe: Evan, listen, whatever I may think of you right now- these people need you to inspire them!

Evan: What, to KIDNAP PEOPLE?!?!

Zoe: To work together!

Evan: TO KIDNAP PEOPLE!?!?

Jared: Evan, I thought we both agreed, a stoner is not a people.

-

Alana: Evan, stop! This isn't you! You've gone mad with power!

Evan: Well, of course I have.

Evan: Have you ever tried going mad without power?

Evan: It's boring.

-

Evan: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.--

Jared: What was that??

Evan: Remorse code.

Jared: I'm even angrier at you now.

-

Connor, high off his ass: I'm at least 10 times funnier and sexier than you.

Evan: But 10 times 0 is just 0.

Zoe: Then I guess the jokes on you, because he can't do math.

-

Jared: I can explain.

Evan: Can you?

Jared: If you give me 30 seconds to think of a lie.

-

Jared: If you were to vacuum up jello, it'd make a neat noise.

Evan: I beg to differ.

Jared: Then beg.

-

Jared: This is such a bad idea.

Evan: Then why are you coming along?

Jared: One of us needs to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this all goes terribly wrong.

-

Connor: *Accidentally hits Jared in the face*

Connor: *Can't decide between saying 'I'm fucking sorry', and 'Are you okay'*

Connor: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY??

Evan: What is wrong with you?!

-

Evan: This is bothering me.

Jared: Well, you are digging up a corpse.

Evan: No, not that. That's, uh, pretty par for the course, actually.

-

Jared: You're the love of my life, and my best friend. I would do anything for you.

Evan: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule.

Jared: Absolutely not.

-

Jared: I was arrested for being too cool.

Connor: The charges were dropped due to lack of supporting evidence.

-

Jared: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I'll wait.

Evan: You and me.

Jared, tearing up: Okay.

-

Jared: God, give me patience.

Connor: I think you mean strength.

Jared: If God gave me strength, then you'd be double dead.

-

Connor: I prevented a murder today.

Alana: Really? How did you do that?

Connor: Self control.

-

Jared: I am not out of control! I am a law abiding citizen!

Evan: Name one law.

Jared: Don't kill people?

Evan: That one's on me. I set the bar too low.

-

Alana: Whaddaya call a fish with no eye?

Jared, not looking up from his phone: Myxine Circifrons.

Alana:

Alana: A fsh

-

Evan: I turned out perfectly fine!

Zoe: This morning you thought a ghost made your toast!

Evan: I DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN, Y O U DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN-

-

Jared: WHAT'S YOUR TYPE

Evan: Anything, honestly. But nerds especially.

Jared, desperately as Evan bleeds out: YOUR B L O O D TYPE

Evan: Oh! B positive.

Jared: DON'T TRY TO CHEER ME UP, JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE

Evan:

-

Evan: It's dark in here...

Jared: Don't worry dude, I've got this

Jared: *Stomps his foot on the ground*

Jared: *Heelies light up*

-

Evan: Treat spiders the way YOU want to be treated!

Jared: Killed without hesitation.

Alana & Evan, simultaneously: nO-

-

Miguel: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Connor: Okay?

Miguel: And make out during the scary parts.

Connor: The-

Connor: The scary parts-

Connor: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl?

-

Evan: Can you PLEASE be serious for 5 minutes??

Jared: My record is 4, but I think I can do it.

-

Evan: So that's my plan.

Jared: Are you fine with constructive criticism? I don't want to sound mean.

Evan: Sure, go ahead.

Jared: It fucking sucks.

Evan: That's not constructive criticism.

-

Jared: Fuck.

Alana: We've got to work on your cursing.

Jared: Why? I'm pretty good at cursing already.

-

Connor: Lol heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this lmfao

Evan: What did you do-?

Connor: A MISTAKE-

-

Larry, with his back turned: I've been expecting you.

Connor: How did you do that without turning around?

Larry: I'm gonna be honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you.

-

Evan: How petty can you get??

Jared: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

-

Jared: Today is a day of running through hurdles.

Alana: Aren't you supposed to jump OVER hurdles?

Jared: Whatever. Fear is only something to be afraid of if you let it scare you.

-

Jared: May I sit there?

Evan: That's my lap.

Jared: That doesn't answer my question, Evan.

-

Jared: So.. are we flirting right now?

Connor: I'm LITERALLY stabbing you.

Jared:

Jared: That does not answer the question

-

Aftermath of the last one- lmfao-

Evan: I'm begging you, please go to the hospital-

Jared: Oh, i'm sorry, is this OUR stab wound? Stay out of it.

-

Jared: Do you have any skeletons in your closet?

Connor: Do you mean literally or figuratively?

Jared: The fact that I have to specify...

-

Evan: Jail is no fun. I'll tell you that much.

Connor: Oh, you've been?

Evan: Once. In Monopoly.

-

Evan: Your right.

Jared: That's... an unusual phrase for you. Did you just learn it?

-

Jared: Petition to remove the 'd' from Wednesday.

Connor, high: Wednesay.

Jared: Not what I had in mind, but i'm flexible.

-

Alana: Man.. I only ever see you awake. Don't you ever shut down or stop running?

Jared: Oh, i'm always running.

Jared: The question is from what.

-

Evan: Top 30 reasons why Evan is super sorry! ..Number 5 might surprise you!

Jared: Top 30 anime deaths. Number One: YOUR FUCKING ASS RIGHT NOW!!

[overdosemaxxer]

Hey.

[djbead123]

KLEINPHY FOR @wormy-worm

Happy Gifting day!

@sincerely-us

[homo-phoneic]

When the ship is so dead tumblr does this

[officalcravingcraze]

Hey everyone! I need some ideas for drawings, so feel free to send some in!

[deh-essays]

Some random kleinphy headcanons :)

They fight so often you'd think they hate each other

The kind of couple that walk around school holding hands, but do it in complete silence acting like they're worst enemies

Their version of a 'date' is smoking weed and playing video games or watching bad reality TV and making out until 3am

If Jared gets a text while he's in school that just says a location, it means Connor wants to make out.

They make fun of each other all the time, unless the other looks upset about something. Then they switch almost immediately.

Jared is a complete mom friend. He's constantly "did you take your meds?" Or "how much have you smoked?" Or "get to sleep, it's late" no matter how much he acts mean to him

Connor does the same, but in a different way. Way more aggressive. "take your fucking meds" and "fuck off, go to bed" and "stop acting like a bitch and talk to me". It's mean, but effective.

Surprisingly, Connor is the biggest cuddler. If he's had a stressful day, he'll just melt into Jared's arms immediately and refuse to leave them.

They both like giving gifts and spoiling the other. It's entirely unnecessary. One pays for food one date, the other pays for food the next. Splitting the bill doesn't exist.

Jared gets along better than expected with Larry. Mainly because the first time he saw Connor smile in months was when he was with Jared.

Connor never sees Jared's parents. Ever. He's very cagey talking about it. Hence why Cynthia basically becomes his second mom.

Connor is still depressed. Obviously. Because Jared can't just cure his depression like magic. But, having a good shoulder to cry on sure as hell helps.

Neither of them came out to anyone. They just, kinda, started dating. That was it. Nobody actually bullies them, mainly because they're more confused than anything.

Nobody expected it. They never even seemed to talk, then one day they just suddenly started acting like a couple

Started dating because Jared apologized for everything he said after hearing about Connors attempt and feeling terrible for weeks. It was awkward as hell, and Connor found it weirdly endearing.

As soon as they were friends, there was a weird amount of sexual tension out of nowhere. They fucked before they dated.

Compete about who can make the worst sappy nickname. Jare-bear, Consy-wonsy, jarey-poo, Connie cons, ect.

Connors actual favourite nickname is babe. Especially whining it. If he wants something from Jared, the first thing he'll hear is "baaaaaaaaaabe!"

Jared goes on long rants about things he's interested in. Connor barely ever knows what he's talking about, but absolutely loves seeing him so passionate.

Connor very very occasionally sings or plays music for Jared, and Jared will almost always cry.

When he draws him, he leaves it on his desk or in his bag without a word. Jared keeps every single one.

They occasionally have super soft tender moments, and Jared jokes his way out of it every time.

[pirefoxx]

alternatively;

[nonbinaryeddiekaspbrak]

hehe rarepair make brain go brrrr

(read tags)