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arkofangels · 1 day ago

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Productivity Is Dead, and So Is Hope

Pairing: Doug (Date Everything!) x Reader Summary: You’re spiraling again—stuck in your apartment, haunted by half-finished emails and a growing pile of undone tasks. Enter Doug: the literal embodiment of your existential dread, wearing pink boxers and a smug attitude. As you try (and fail) to be productive, Doug mocks you, comforts you, and dares you to face the crushing weight of existence with at least a little style. It’s not about fixing everything—it’s about showing up, even if you're a mess. Especially if you're a mess.

Because Doug isn’t going anywhere. And honestly? You kind of need him.

Even if he calls you “dork” every five minutes.

You’re running.

Not physically. God no. You’re “running” from responsibility by walking in anxious circles around your apartment while holding a mug you reheated three times and still haven’t touched.

Your phone buzzes. You ignore it. Your to-do list stares at you from across the room like a judgmental ex.

And then, like clockwork, comes the voice:

“Well, well, well. Look at this sexy, twitchy little disaster parade.”

You spin around. Doug’s perched on your kitchen counter, legs swinging like a bored teenager, abs fully present and accounted for. He’s holding a spoon for no reason. Possibly to mock you. Probably just because he can.

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” you snap.

Doug gasps, offended. “Excuse you. I am doing something. I’m observing your majestic descent into existential paralysis.” He gestures broadly with the spoon. “Art. Truly. You should charge admission.”

You take a sip of your coffee. It’s still cold.

Doug watches you like a smug cat that just knocked over a priceless vase. “You know you’ve read the same email draft seventeen times, right? At this point, I think you and that apology email are in a committed relationship.”

You groan, setting your mug down. “Why do you always show up when I’m falling apart?”

He shrugs. “Because I’m the hot ghost of your subconscious who thrives off emotional instability and the faint scent of body spray. Also, you left your mind wide open, and I crawled in like a raccoon in a garage. Congratulations.”

You sit on the couch and bury your face in your hands.

Doug drops down beside you. “Look, dork. I know the void is screaming. I can hear it too. That’s kind of my whole thing.” He nudges your leg with his knee. “But if you just sit here marinating in self-loathing, you’re basically inviting me to move in full-time. And I do shed metaphorically.”

You peek at him through your fingers. “Do you ever stop talking?”

“Nope. I’m like the world’s worst motivational speaker. Except instead of making you believe in yourself, I make you hyper-aware of your failure potential. But, like, hotly.”

You roll your eyes. “What’s the point of anything?”

Doug flops back dramatically, arms stretched wide. “Ohhh, there it is. The classic line. The main event. You’re asking me—a metaphysical sadboy with sculpted abs and the emotional range of a Dostoevsky novel—what the point is?”

He grins at you upside down. “There isn’t one, dork. That’s the beauty of it. There’s no cosmic scoreboard, no divine Yelp review. You’re free to screw up gloriously. So why not at least try something stupid before you die?”

You stare at him. “That’s the worst pep talk I’ve ever heard.”

Doug smirks. “And yet, you’re still here. Listening. Interesting.”

You grab a pen off the coffee table. You don’t even know what for. Doug leans closer, his voice low and teasing.

“There you go. Tiny, pathetic act of agency. So brave. So tragic. I’m weeping internally.”

You flip him off. He looks delighted.

You open your laptop. You delete the draft. You start again.

Doug lies across the back of the couch like a morally gray cat, watching.

“You’re doing it,” he whispers. “You’re ignoring me. How dare you grow.”

You smirk. Just a little.

Doug leans in, voice soft, almost… warm? “Seriously, though. You’re not completely hopeless. You’re like… faintly hopeful. Like a moldy slice of bread that might still toast okay.”

You laugh, despite yourself.

And for now, that’s enough. Because the dread is still there. But so are you. And so is Doug.

Unfortunately.

#fanfic #arkofangels #date everything x reader #date everything game #date everything #Doug #doug date everything #Doug x reader #Doug date everything x reader #fanfiction #its nearly 2am

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curtain-caller · 1 day ago

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So after 8ish days, I finished my first Date Everything play through. Here are my random notes I wrote as I played (caution: long and full of spoilers)

Fuck it, I'm jotting this down through notes app first. I tried using Tumblr drafts but it sent when I tried to save for some reason. If you saw anything a week ago, no you didn't.

God I love the voice actors including the typos in the texts, especially when David goes off later on too many mojitos.

Now I know I've made it clear I'm a Scandalabra lover... But I need to SAVOR him, you know? Pace myself. Not blast through his route as fast as possible. (<- Oblivious to the bugs at this point)

Because of that, I started with Gaia and thought it'd be fun if I finish the route of whoever's hint she gives me first.

She sent me to Amir and-WHAT THE FUCK LUCINDA WHERE DID YOU COME FROM??? I mean, I'm not unhappy to see you, just caught off guard. Hi.

Oooooohhhhhhh, so she just intercepts any convo at random, huh? Well, it saves me the trouble of having to look for her.

I FOUND SHADOWLORD IMMEDIATELY!!! God, I felt like a lil smarty pants for once, hell yeah. For some reason, Gaia's shadow always did catch my eye, even before the game came out. Art school really paid off when it comes to learning about shadow placement. Oh, and thanks for the little nudge, Maggie!

Great, I'm never gonna pronounce "schedule" the same way again. Shhhhedule. Thanks Timothy.

OH HI NIGHTMARE, wasn't expecting to see you this early. Why... Why am I kinda into this?

I wanna meet Mrs. Chaffon so badly. I believe Curt, she has never done anything wrong in her whole life

Why am I tearing up over The Great Constructing of Beaver Proudtail. I guessed Teddy's route would make me cry, but not like this!

CHAIREMI IM SO SORRY I THOUGHT CHOOSING "MAKE LOVE WITH THE ALIENS" WOULD BE FUNNY, I REGRET IT IMMEDIATELY, I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE YOU UMCOMFY I SWEAR oh my god I feel so bad

Scandalabra got mentioned during the trip with Mitchell to Daisuke's restaurant and I briefly became the embodiment of the "neuron activation" meme

Redeemed myself at Chairemi's next play. I was dodging those suggestive options like a motherfucker.

So I never thought I'd be into them but... Me. Shadowlord420. Nightmare. Both at the same time. Next question.

TEDDY CONFESSED IN OUR SECOND TALK BECAUSE I LISTENED TO HIS STORY??? Well obviously I couldn't say no... He was just too cute about it. Dude's been pining for the player since they were little, that shit destroyed me. He's a patootie of the cutest variety.

"Oh yeah, I'm not surprised Doug has content aware, since some probably don't wanna deal with existential dread-WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT'S NOT THE REASON???"

A TIDAL WAVE OF WHAT NOW THAT ENDS IN WORLD PEACE??? BEN-HWA??? (Omfg the game knew what I was thinking)

They weren't lying, Dana really did go off in the recording booth, Vaughn is fucking hilarious

Sheesh, this game makes me feel as busy as Florence probably is. "Alright, I've gotta check in with Maggie, work out Dirk and Harper's relationship issues by three, say hi to Curt and Rod sometime today... Oh, can't forget to get Vaughn some cheese! Should say hi to Barry while I'm at it, I haven't talked to him in ages-Dammit, I forgot I talked to Wallace today." If I really do have undiagnosed ADHD, this game is NOT helping

You mean to tell me Dirk WAS getting it on with someone else... And that... was a bat-man dakimakura?... I'd make a joke, but I wanna bang a candelabra, I have no room to talk.

...Fuck, Shadowlord is kinda relatable. Not to trauma dump on main(/j), but I've had plenty of friends I don't talk to anymore, all because we just drifted apart. I feel him.

I already learned about this before but I KNEW THERE WAS A 6TH HANK!!! I CALLED IIIIIIIIT!!!

I feel so bad for Lucinda. Girl, you are making me happy, you're fucking hilarious and spontaneous!!!

THERE'S A 7TH HANK!? AN 8TH!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN??? Hank #2, keep talking, give me the Hank lore deep dive.

My g/t heart is swelling at the thought of carrying a tiny Keith in my pocket right now. So small... lil old man in my pocket...

Also. Keith and Dorian? 2 bros. Chilling in a doorframe. 0 feet apart and they're gay as he-OHHH THEY'RE EXES??? OH SHIT. MY B. (Consider: qpps) (<- Doesn't know yet)

Thank god I didn't need to make a battering ram gijinka oc to get into the attic. SOPHIA, COME TO MEEE

David, you better be making me co-founder if you think I'll even CONSIDER giving Skylar up

*furiously drags a chair over to sit next to Scandalabra during Keyes' performance* Heyyyyy bbg what a surprise nice to see you hey wanna hold hands maybe kiss-

...So Shadowlord is a scrawny nerd who roleplays online named Skips Shadley? ...I love him omfg.

Before you ask, yeah, I'm not shocked about Realization. Not because I'm not excited about it! But because... Well, I may have spoiled myself on the implications beforehand. Still, the story is great so far.

Alright, got my first hate ending... With Shadowlord. Because I denied becoming darkness. On the bright side, Reggie's line was hilarious. "The fuck was that!?"

"Little Crapper accepts any ass." Woah, he's bisexual, I didn't know that!(I did, I just wanna make that reference)

Lmao, unfurnished business. Thank god Realizing everyone is Skylar's business, because I was planning on doing that anyways, and was worried I'd forget someone and be like "NO GO BACK I FORGOT TO GRAB KRISTOFF"

That being said, I AM choosing to realize everyone all at once(ish). I'm waiting until I get an ending with EVERYBODY before I just go around and treat this like a real first person shooter with my Realization gun. BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG-

Met Dishy. Locked in for the 100% download goal. Timed myself too. It took... Four minutes?(Albeit 4 minutes of button mashing but still). Honestly I thought this would've taken longer. Like 20, minimum. Huh. Well, props the devs for not driving us crazy with that.

Okay, as much as I love this game, I need to take some marks off for the fact it's crashed on me a bazillion times overall. Thankfully the game autosaves pretty regularly, so it's not like I need to redo an in-game week or something.

Oh my god, everyone who made jokes about Scandalabra being an ace attorney witness were SPOT ON, I got to that part of Maggie's route. "Scandalabra loses control, looking rather like a harried murderer at the witness stand."

GIVE US THE SCANDALABRA ASS SHOT TEAM 17, DOES HE HAVE CAKE OR NOT (I'm a firm believer he's got a flat ass and those pantaloons give the illusion of him being cheeked up)

I FUCKING CALLED IIIIIIT, HE'S FAKE AS FUCK. I CALLED HIS VOICE AND NAME BEING FAKE!!! I'm... Not sure how to feel about his actual voice, but I don't hate it. It's just a sudden change is all.

HIS NAME IS JON!?!?!??! JON WICK!?!? (okay I kinda spoiled myself on that beforehand too but it's genuinely genius, I never would have thought of it.)

Now, I preface this note with a warning that I am joking and exaggerating, and wish no ill will to this specific person. This is laced with the biggest of /js. That being said: HA, jokes on you, that one person in the Scandalabra Trailer comments that told me he was probably just mimicking the player's tone during that one line! I caught it day one! I KNEW HIS ACCENT WAS FAKE MOTHERFUCKERS! CHAT, CLIP THAT SHIT, I FEEL SO FUCKING SMART! GIVE ME THAT MAGNIFYING GLASS HAT MAGGIE, I EARNED THIS! WOOOOOOOOO-

I know this is a feeling many people have had with the cast, but Beau is the first character to make me go "wait, she sounds familiar..." OH MY GOD PETRA FROM MINECRAFT STORY MODE!?!?!?! ASHLEY JOHNSON YOU ICON

Omg, Martin flirting with Maggie... The polycule is growing

Oh. So he really was just crazy. Or, well, hallucinating. Don't worry Sinclaire, you'll still become human! Eventually.

OHHH okay I was so confused about Zoey because I thought I couldn't talk to her without a charge. Makes sense I guess, since Skylar specifies you're not wearing the dateviators while talking to her.

Oh shit, Zoey trans moment, she chose her own name /hj

Got a hate ending with Errol. Look, in my defense, the narrator goaded me, and I can't turn down a mozzarella stick. Jokes on you, Friar, I'm not religious

Silver Senorita, omfg. I'm not even that old and even I get that one. You think Scandalabra would like it? Silver in the name, after all.

So Chance and Parker DO know each other! I can hear the shippers going wild from here.

AYO??? MONIQUE AND SOPHIA??? Are they... Y'know... *scissor snipping finger gesture*

I love Zoey, but her route kinda confused me a little. I thought I had to go speak to each concept character one by one to convince them to come instead of just... meeting them in the first place.

Well, as gross as the shrine is, Fantina got something right: my love for candles.

Scandalabra's little date-a-dex doodle of the MC having a round nose and freckles... Fuck I was kinda spot on with making Guy Heartley for this, I'm taking this as canon.

Chairem anime mentioned!!!

Mitchell. You flirted with me over wine and we kissed, what do you MEAN I'm not up to your palate!? Oh well, I'll take friends.

WHY DO I GET TO SEE REBEL'S ASS BUT NOT SCANDALABRA'S GOD DAMMIT, nvm, this game is 0 stars, worst game ever

Yo, Scandy, bbg, I found someone you can relate to! So he's a magician but he's actually Ron from Llodyminster (Ron and Jon besties, hear me out)

Okay, after talking to her, like, 5 times, Nightmare's voice started to sound familiar to me. Alright Erica Luttrell, give me answers--SAPPHIRE STEVEN FUCKING UNIVERSE!?!?!?!?

LIGIBIDIQUA. Bohdi I love you. I'm putting this on the fridge next to Los Jibbities and the Alphabet Mafia.

So I found out that there are a few glitches that are going to keep me from completing certain characters for the time being (which explains Gaia not cooperating with me), so I'm gonna try to get as many endings as possible, and wait until the next patch before going for 100% romance.

Did Bohdi really just pull a "I feel a song coming on!" After I romanced him? God, this dork...I love him

Artt, what was that laugh after calling me flexible. Are you into me? Cause honestly ur kinda cute

I got enough lovers to woo Scandalabra!!! Fumbled a bit before realizing I had to lift him with the glasses off to smooch him. Oops, oh nooo, I did it again. And again... And again... Maybe if I do it enough times I'll force my way into passing by the bug. LET ME IN, YOU CANT KEEP HIM FROM ME DAEMON-

Cabrizzio gets me. The moon is gorgeous as hell.

Got a hate ending with Eddie and Volt. On the bright side, I've heard this is a common occurrence.

KEITH I OWE U MY LIFE, I made things up with Shadowlord using a smarts candy and now we're buddies. Friar Errol can get fucked, tho, I only have 1 smarts candy

Is the little house painting on Artt's route actually of the house? (Well, the house from the initial trailer). That's cute if that's the case.

I was initially pissed at Willi slapping Scandalabra... until she explained why. Sorry Scandy, I love you, but I'm not the "my bbg did nothing wrong" type of person, you kinda deserved it.

Oh, sorry for assuming you and Sophia were sapphic, Monique

Got a hate ending with Jean. Not too mad tbh. I wasn't all that into him. He was a pretty solid teacher though, surprisingly.

Speaking of which, I feel like Jean and Telly would get along given Telly's pension for rhyming.

*Sigh* my game crashed midway through Sassy Chap's game show. Guess I'll be more hesitant to finish it on one go.

-Branching off of that, however, I got to Amanda Hufford's part and... Well, if by some crazy chance Amanda and/or the dev team are reading this mess of miscellaneous notes and comments, I have a message: I love this game. I know I've been complaining here and there, and as of writing this there are a few bugs and issues that you guys are working out, but those flaws pale in comparison to the final product. Money well spent. I WILL be replaying this, and not just because of route issues. I was planning on playing 3 times through this game at the very least. Maybe even more. So keep that chin high: you guys rock, and this game rocks.

...Oh, and uh, Ray Chase, if you're seeing this, please for the love of god forgive me for the heavy Scandalabra thirst.

Tony's "You know what I'm talking about!" back and forth is a nightmare for my echolalia.

DAMN. Prissy IS everywhere holy crap. Sparkle on girl. Fuck it up. And try not to die on me, I struggle to keep a lot of plants alive...

"Oh dear. Now I'm racist." Stella you're so fucking funny. I love you.

I chose Enchanter with Chance, and immediately fell in love with Moys. You know damn well I died for him. I'm a sucker for cute, innocent NPCs.

What do you mean Mikey has kids??? Does he lose his kids in the (divorce) realization?

Saw Abel talk about Ben-hwa. Lmao, hes so shy and awkward about the topic of sex, it's kinda cute

Diana's lil "ba da dun da" diary dance in object mode is so fucking cute

I love seeing the others helping Holly with operation "get Holly to chill the fuck out" or however it was phrased. Also, Rebel calling Betty "mummy"... I can't.

I've only known the dipogenes for 2 minutes but if anything happened to them id burn down this fucking house

I need a gossip group to form because Windolyn and Scandalabra would get along so well. Same with Bathsheba. And Phoenicia. The list goes on.

Oh hey, I managed to kinda brute force my way into romancing Gaia, I think. Hurray!!!

CEILING AND FLOOR YURI CONFIRMED, I CALLED IT

THE BATHSHEBA SANS UNDERTALE REFERENCE IS REAL???

I got some weird, lowkey scaring lighting glitch where everything was tinted red until I closed out of the game and started it back up again??? I'm guessing some kind of mess up between the regular lighting and the glasses lighting. It's fine now though.

Stop, Koa is too cute... Also I fucking cackled at "CANDY ME UP BIG DADDY"

Dante complaining about objects being parasocially attached to humans they don't know... *looks at Hector and Fantina*

I'm wondering if the dialogue is different for Penelope's "date" with Skylar depending on pronouns and status. She says she doesn't like girls with glasses, but I was also a girl is technically wearing Skylar, who got with her before this. Gonna check this in other playthroughs.

DANTE'S MEME REDRAW COLLECTABLE IM SOBBING bro is so devastated

I know he's probably still buggy and all but I still ran to Scandalabra with my 90 empathy to ask him out. Genuinely, the conversation was so sweet. I fucking knew it, dude was just jealous. It's okay my bbg you can be real with me, we don't need to kiss (but if you want to we can please please please please please-)

Aww, Winifred is so cute, she misses the kid she used to hum to when they hid next to her during hide and seek. That's so precious.

Oh, Drysdale brings up Prissy when mentioning flowers during one of his chats! God I love continuity. Must've been a nightmare keeping track for this game.

Look, I adore Mikey, I even romanced him... But something about his Brundle Merchant voice gets on my nerves. I'm respectfully muting the game for those sections, sorry.

Why am I in the cuck chair all of a sudden with River and Winnifred GIRLS IM RIGHT HERE-

"That's easy for you to say, no one put you together wrong" SHELLEY??? BABYGIRL??? Oh my god why does everyone in this fucking house need THERAPY

"Whoever im holding up is going to break and it'll be my fault" OH MY GOD I DIDNT EVEN CONSIDER THAT, Shelley...

The visual of slapping Phoenicia into Freddy like a slice of cheese fucking SLAYS ME

STOP omg Abel and Dasha are so cute together. Abel's such a smooth talker god damn

Did I skip a date with Cam??? He's talking about a fight I don't remember... Oh well. Got a friend end with him somehow.

AWW ARMA... god the implications are so dark. Arma watched a bunch of people (er, things) die and blames herself. HELLO. IS THERE A THERAPIST OBJECT AROUND HERE?????

Omg Mitchell hosted a little kitchen party and the fruit bowl was replaced with a cake!!! That's so cute

Barry's lil makeup object animation when you finish a love route... so cute

"She Yank My Handle 'Til My Tube, She Overflow" IM CCRYING#?!? OH MG GOD.

I feel like Airyn would really get along with Koa, given their belief in enjoying the moment and quiet.

Damn, okay. Low-key fuck you Drysale, Washford had every right to be betrayed by you giving Dirk goo goo eyes you bitch

OKAY FUCK YOU TOO WASHFORD I HAVEN'T SAID SHIT bro fuck the stackables low-key, y'all are both too stubborn (I'm exaggerating but still BRO DID I MISS A CONVO OR SOMETHING??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN I MOCKED YOU??)

ARMA NO DON'T BECOME AN ARSONIST!!!

THE BURN MARK IS ACTUALLY THERE omg, ARMA GET TF OVER HERE YOU LIL-

"Be not afraid of the queso" is something I'm adopting into my vocabulary, thanks Miranda

...Hear me out. Cabrizzio and Stefan should kiss. I just saw their interaction, and even if Cabrizzio pissed him off, I think they'd be cute.

Oh, I didn't think getting a second chance with Jean Loo would be this easy. Well, I've got 100 SPECS everywhere. Let's dance you loo.

OH NO, NOT THE FIRST PERSON PRONOUNS! IM DOOMED!!!

GOT HIS ASS LET'S GOOO!!! Still friendzoned him tho. Not kissing the toilet.

"Date Everything would like to remind you to please drink responsibly" thank you for the PSA devs

Alright, time to start realizing as many people as I'm able to.

I was wondering how I was gonna Realize Lucinda, since she wasn't coming up anymore! DAMN SHE LOOKS CUTE

SOPHIA'S REALIZED FORM HOLY FUCKING DHIT IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY IM FAY IMG AY IM FY VIMA GAY GYAHFNAKSNFNSM

CONNIE'S REALIZED FORM I'm going to fucking scream my aroace card is being slowly revoked

Tried to realize Wallace but was unable to because he had to appear elsewhere for plot reasons apparently related to Hero Hime. Dammit girl, get here already!!!

KEITH!? KEITH!??!?!?!?! BRO YOU SHOULD'VE STAYED IN THAT CRAWLSPACE TO ROT YOU JUST ROBBED ME AND DIED!!! I heard he died via spoilers but I thought it was of old age, not THIS SHIT

"Daemon... IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU" Jokes on you bitch I'm lying down against a wall (<--- still scared shitless)

Nekoboru? Nekoboru.

STOOOOP TINA'S HAIR IS SO CUTE WHILE ITS DOWN

"Now that we're alone, I need you to listen to me" NEKOBORU??? YOU CAN FUCKING TALK???...Eh, not too surprising of a twist given Wallace's route.

IS THAT A FUCKING JOJO REFERENCE, oh my god no wonder Doug was doing jojo poses

Tinfoil hat and David Most? They were roommates!? Oh my god they were roommates...

OMG DIANA AND BARRY HYPERFIXATION BUDDIES??? That's so cute. Toucan lizard lover solidarity.

NOOO, I CANT REALIZE BARRY??? Arma you bitch why did you have to be glitched (oh hey that rhymes)

Jean Loo became an accountant. Brilliant.

Why does realized Nekoboru remind me of Tony the Tiger. Anyways, I was only worried about him functioning in society for a second until i remembered furries exist. He'll be fine.

I still can't realize Wallace because of Lyric, dammit. I'm guessing I can't do Florence and Celia either... Well, at least I'm gonna feel less bad about leaving some objects behind (like my pookie bear candelabra because the game refuses to let the love ending stick)

-Dorian saw what happened with Keith??? Oh, poor dude...

-"Guys, I may be gay, but I'd rather not be flaming" Diversity loss! Your capitalistic pig of a boss is gay! (I'm not surprised I was just suspecting bi instead)

PRISSY YOU FUCKING GODDESS HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY WHAT KIND OF CRACK DID THEY PUT IN HER REALIZED FORM TO SUMMON THE LESBIANS-

"LET'S COMMENCE FUCKERY." - The Sassy Chap. I wonder if that'll be a new vocal stim. Also LMAO HE'S CANONICALLY BAD IN BED???

Oh my god why are all the ladies' human forms so hot RONGOMAIWHENUA YOU QUEEN

-Alright, I can't realize any more characters thanks to bugs, time to end it. I remember there being an ending in the demo where a drone snatches Skylar, so I'm feeling bad already-IS THAT A FUCKING HELICOPTER!?

-Omg is that really what David Most looks like? Either way, get hit with level 100 empathy, bitch. Cry. Cry old man. Cry about your divorce.

THAT'S WHAT SAM LOOKS LIKE??? OMG SHE'S A CUTIE

Oh my god wait Tom is kinda hot... You know damn well I banged him the second he offered. Call me your lil pogchamp, sir.

OHHH I was wondering who the grey mannequin in the poster was. Hi Val!

Okay so much more is making sense, I've been seeing drawn images attached to the dateable epilogues and got so confused why they weren't popping up post realization. Didn't know there were epilogues 2: electric boogaloo once you left the house.

Does this mean I canonically keep Skylar? Hell yeah, I was gonna feel bad about leaving 10+ things (and my #1 pookie bear) behind, but now I can just hc that I realized them later.

GOD THE CREDITS SONG FUCKS. In fact, so many songs go hard in this game, including Lux's theme, Bobby Pinn's, Telly's, Reggie's and Bathsheba's. My final results...

#date everything #date everything spoilers #date everything!#date everything! spoilers #date everything game #date everything game spoilers #suggestive #per the nature of the game #if you read all of this uhhh thank u i love you

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candyheartedchy · 29 days ago

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Chy, oh my god. There's a little video showing the 100 Date Everything characters from the Date-A-Dex (showing the already revealed characters, silhouettes of unrevealed characters and theories on what objects are some characters).

One of them scared the hell out of me.

( I realised this is a screenshot from one of the YouTube shorts but it still shows the character so yeah )

I got jumpscared by this Dante guy, HE LOOKS JUST LIKE FATHER FROM KND and Father's like. An f/o very close to my heart. Immediately got attached to him by his character design. Yup. Gonna keep this guy in mind...

I also just watched the video on Gaia and I ADORE HER. I really relate to her difficulties on socialising and her line "People tell me that I never shut up. I can help you learn to never shut up!" is just so, so sweet. Literally helping with something I genuinely have trouble with irl. She makes me smile ^^

Oh and there's Doug. His whole...... everything allures me so he's another one on the list.

So there's a sink, a fireplace, a globe and, what the video I mentioned described Doug as, existential dread. So there's four now.

This ask was originally to be just about Dante but I rambled a lot on other characters instead. Oh I'm definitely getting real excited for this game to come out....

Hey Meera!! And YOURE RIGHT THAT CHARACTER DOES LOOK A BIT LIKE FATHER FROM KND!! And I definitely get being attached to a character design right away (done it myself with a few of the characters from that game who were revealed so far lol). And that’s what’s so exciting about the game overall is that there’s SO MANY CUTE characters!! :D

#meerphanim #💌 letters 💌

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slaughtame · 7 days ago

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Doug (Existential Dread) smut headcanons

note: This is a remake headcanons of Doug [but a bit more mean (?)]

pt. 1 smut headcanons

His dirty talking and degrading play is absolutely INSANEEEE. He’d probably be like, “Take you worthless slut” while whispering in your ear, or he’d say, “My bitch” while growling in your ear 😭…

His dick is thick. I just KNOW it. So thick that you thought you might see a glimpse of heaven for a second.

He’s DOMINANT. There’s no in between, he’s specifically a hard dom. I’M TELLING YOUU!!

His kinks/fetishes are:

Degradation (giving)

Humiliation (giving)

Dacryphilia (receiving)

Oral sex (receiving)

Brat taming (both receiving and giving)

Depending of your kinks, he’d probably judge you (ssighhh sorry). Any freaky, niche kink you may have… he will judge you 😭. Yes including praise, he thinks you’re too “vanilla” or some shit. You need to find some middle ground and leaning to a bit more freakier to get his attention or something. The dude is really fucking picky LIKE HELLA PICKY.

He doesn’t admit it, but he lowkey likes it when you “attempt to” keyword on “attempt”, to dominate him. He’ll play along, pretending you got him submissive and all. But he’ll immediately pin you down on whichever surface he can find, bend you down, and fuck you there 😨.

I could see him more rough when you guys are FWB. But if you stay in this relationship longer and persistent, despite him texting his side chicks or some shit like that. I feel like he’d kinda pity you, so therefore is a BIT softer, actually— just a pinch of softer when you guys have sex. He is not gonna admit he pities you, hell nah!

A decent aftercare with him? BROCHACHO?! WHAT’S THAT?!?! 🤣🤣😂😂

His after care is kinda ass not gonna lie. Like after getting your brain into mush, he’d probably just go back to texting Abbie from “WattsApp” on his phone to see if she unblocked him. If he’s feeling generous, he’d probably give you the time to converse with him before leaving you or give you a water bottle. THAT or he’s willing to doomscroll with you if he’s feeling nice. (WOW! WHAT A GREAT BOYFRIEND /sarc)

(Mind you, he rarely feels nice. Fork found in the kitchen ahh fact, but whatever)

#━ (っ'-')╮ ᯓ ✉︎ val talks #date everything #de #date everything doug #date everything Doug existential dread #Doug dread existential dread #Existential dread #Date everything smut #Date everything doug smut

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motherfucker-somewhat-limited · 6 years ago

Note

1: Name

Sarah

2: Age

3: Fears

Everything, I have anxiety

4: 3 things I love

Dogs, weird movies, sunsets over water

5: 4 turns on

Long hair, facial piercings, good sense of humor, back muscles

6: 4 turns off

Poor hygiene, rude to service workers, adults who are still obsessed with Disney to the point where they make it a personality trait, Trump supporters (or the equivalent in other countries)

7: My best friend

@wanderingwondererofthings

8: Sexual orientation

Bi? I think? IDK not straight tho

9: My best first date

I’ve only ever been on one date in my life and the dude ghosted me afterward which turned out to be a blessing bc it was not a good time in my life to try to start a relationship

10: How tall am I

5′2″

11: What do I miss

Mental stability

12: What time were I born

3:45 am or thereabouts

13: Favourite color

black

14: Do I have a crush

celebrity crushes but I don’t really count those

15: Favourite quote

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

16: Favourite place

bundled up under a heap of blankets by myself in a dark room with good snacks and a good book/movie

17: Favourite food

chocolate

18: Do I use sarcasm

do i

19: What am I listening to right now

my housemate doing laundry

20: First thing I notice in new person

what they’re wearing

21: Shoe size

womens 7

22: Eye color

brown

23: Hair color

brown

24: Favourite style of clothing

love that goth shit

25: Ever done a prank call?

not that i can remember

26: Meaning behind my URL

adam darski’s true form

27: Favourite movie

Ink (2009) dir. jamin winans

28: Favourite song

UHHHHHHHHHHH

29: Favourite band

Eluveitie

30: How I feel right now

like shit lol

31: Someone I love

My friends

32: My current relationship status

single

33: My relationship with my parents

it’s good and i’m very grateful

34: Favourite holiday

the day after halloween when all the candy goes on sale

35: Tattoos and piercing I have

none

36: Tattoos and piercings I want

seriously considering getting my eyebrow pierced soon. if I ever cut my hair short i’ll pierce my ears

37: The reason I joined Tumblr

to follow an art blog that made amazing JTHM fan art

38: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

what ex

39: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

yeah from my mom

40: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

yeah it was my mom

41: When did I last hold hands?

yesterday with my grandma

42: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

takes me well over an hour to actually get up but then like 3o minutes tops

43: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

44: Where am I right now?

in my room

45: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

i’ve never been that drunk because i hate hangovers

46: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

reasonable level unless i’m at a concert

47: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

not anymore

48: Am I excited for anything?

sexy eggman is coming to san francisco

49: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

50: How often do I wear a fake smile?

basically whenever i have to talk to strangers

51: When was the last time I hugged someone?

yesterday

52: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

my mom is allowed to kiss other people it’s okay

53: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

i don’t think so?

54: What is something I disliked about today?

i’m tired of being tired

55: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

my soulmate

56: What do I think about most?

spirals of existential dread

57: What’s my strangest talent?

I have no talents lol

58: Do I have any strange phobias?

going down stairs. i’m fine going up them but going down them freaks me out

59: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

depends on my mood and whether or not i’m ugly that day

60: What was the last lie I told?

“I’m okay”

61: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

In person or don’t fucking talk to me

62: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

yes and yes

63: Do I believe in magic?

idk. i believe there’s things that happen that we can’t explain yet so maybe that’s magic

64: Do I believe in luck?

i believe in good chances

65: What’s the weather like right now?

dark

66: What was the last book I’ve read?

The Habitation of the Blessed by Catherynne Valente

67: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

yes as long as i don’t have a headache or stomachache

68: Do I have any nicknames?

just dumb shit my mom calls me

69: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

worst acute injury was the time i tripped onto an outdoor heater in kindergarten and burned the shit out of my hand. i also have a stress fracture in my spine that will never heal from gymnastics but that happened over a matter of years

70: Do I spend money or save it?

i try to save but i spend a little too much

71: Can I touch my nose with a tounge?

with a tongue? yes. with my tongue? no

72: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?

my fluffy pillow

73: Favourite animal?

take a wild fucking guess

74: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

trying unsuccessfully to sleep

75: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

Columbus

76: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

That Time of the Month by Harley Poe

77: How can you win my heart?

be a dog

78: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

ceci n’est pas un corps

79: What is my favorite word?

sussuration or cathedral

80: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

this is the internet equivalent of the judgment of paris

81: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

eat the rich

82: Do I have any relatives in jail?

not currently

83: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

shapeshifting bitch

84: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

i’ll say anything on the internet i don’t give a shit

85: What is my current desktop picture?

86: Had sex?

87: Bought condoms?

88: Gotten pregnant?

89: Failed a class?

yeah, fuck ochem

90: Kissed a boy?

91: Kissed a girl?

92: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

93: Had job?

i’ve got one right now

94: Left the house without my wallet?

yeah lol

95: Bullied someone on the internet?

96: Had sex in public?

97: Played on a sports team?

i ran track for a couple years as a kid

98: Smoked weed?

yup

99: Did drugs?

100: Smoked cigarettes?

ew no

101: Drank alcohol?

yuppers

102: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

103: Been overweight?

104: Been underweight?

yes

105: Been to a wedding?

yes

106: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

only 5?

107: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

only 5??

108: Been outside my home country?

yes

109: Gotten my heart broken?

yes but not romantically

110: Been to a professional sports game?

many

111: Broken a bone?

nope

112: Cut myself?

not on purpose

113: Been to prom?

yeah and it sucked and i wish i hadn’t gone

114: Been in airplane?

yes

115: Fly by helicopter?

no but I want to

116: What concerts have I been to?

a multitude

117: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

yeah lol

118: Learned another language?

can I give this one a half a yes?

119: Wore make up?

yup

120: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

121: Had oral sex?

122: Dyed my hair?

yes

123: Voted in a presidential election?

yes

124: Rode in an ambulance?

125: Had a surgery?

do wisdom teeth count?

126: Met someone famous?

yup, holla atcha doug jones

127: Stalked someone on a social network?

no, i don’t care that much

128: Peed outside?

who hasn’t?

129: Been fishing?

130: Helped with charity?

i’ve donated some money

131: Been rejected by a crush?

yeah but a) I never actually asked him out, b) we were 12, and c) turns out he’s gay so like i’m not made about it

132: Broken a mirror?

133: What do I want for birthday?

a new laptop

134: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?

why would i want kids

135: Was I named after anyone?

my great uncle and great grandmother

136: Do I like my handwriting?

i have no opinion on it

137: What was my favourite toy as a child?

legos or something similar you can build with

138: Favourite Tv Show?

UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

139: Where do I want to live when older?

somewhere near the ocean

140: Play any musical instrument?

i wish

141: One of my scars, how did I get it?

i only have acne scars and those are pretty self-explanatory

142: Favourite pizza toping?

sausage, bell pepper, and onion

143: Am I afraid of the dark?

144: Am I afraid of heights?

sometimes

145: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?

no, i’m a good girl

146: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end

yeah, FUCK OCHEM

147: What I’m really bad at

being a functioning human adult person

148: What my greatest achievments are

not killing myself in college

149: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me

idk man i get upset by everything even when it’s not mean

150: What I’d do if I won in a lottery

pay off my friends’ and family’s debts, set aside a big chunk of money for grad school, maybe get my own place depending on how much is left

151: What do I like about myself

i have nice hair

152: My closest Tumblr friend

idk

153: Something I fantasise about

what don’t i fantasize about

154: Any thoughts on the paranormal?

hey demons come and get y’all juice

#asks

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