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ollieofthebeholder · 2 years ago

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to find promise of peace (and the solace of rest): a TMA fanfic

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Chapter 43: December 2001

“Keep up, Martin.” Aunt Lily’s voice is sharp and brisk. “No lagging behind.”

“Yes, Mum,” Martin says obediently.

Gerard tries not to roll his eyes. Aunt Lily has an even better sense for when they’re being impertinent (her word) than his mother does (her word is insubordinate) and he knows she’ll take it out on Martin if she catches him. The truth is that Martin is probably the only person in the family not having trouble keeping up with Gerard’s mother. Melanie has brought along a wooden trunk for some reason, and Gerard doesn’t know if it’s full or just that the trunk itself is heavy, but she mostly seems to be progressing along by heaving the trunk forward and using its momentum to propel herself and she won’t let anyone else help her. Aunt Lily is having one of her bad days and won’t admit it, so her cane is discreetly packed away—if she even brought it—and she’s leaning heavily on Uncle Roger, who’s obviously struggling with both her and their large suitcase.

Martin, on the other hand, has only his backpack, his clothes rolled tightly and neatly slotted in place; that, his current knitting project, and a couple of (carefully vetted) books are the only things he has with him. Even Gerard has packed more than that, and Gerard is used to going on long trips, so this is nothing particularly new.

Except that it is. Because the “trips” Gerard and his mother usually take are work-related, hunting down books and talking to people and…things bound up in the Fourteen. This, though, is an honest-to-goodness vacation.

And it’s one he’s taking with his whole family.

He can’t quite believe that his mother actually agreed to this. He’s not sure what’s going on, what the impetus was, but he’s also not going to ask too many questions lest he not enjoy the answers. Because they’re not just going on vacation, they’re going on vacation to another country, and they’re going to be gone for two whole weeks. She’s even promised she’s not “working”—no meetings, no dealings, no encounters. Just a vacation. She won’t even monitor Gerard’s activities, and he’s welcome to spend as much time with Melanie and Martin as he likes.

There’s got to be a catch somewhere, but for right now he’s going to take it and run.

Right now, the concern is that they might not have left themselves enough time to get through security. Gerard hasn’t flown in a while—his mother usually takes trains whenever possible, and he honestly prefers that—but he guesses wherever they’re going, it’s somehow cheaper for all of them to fly than to take the train. Or maybe she thinks it’ll be better for Aunt Lily. Whatever the case, security is a lot more intense than the last time he flew, and even having left themselves the usual amount of time, Gerard eyes the long lines to get through security and wonders if they’re going to make it. Why the United States has to mess everything up for everybody is beyond him.

Aunt Lily gets to go through a special line once they’ve checked their bags (which takes forever, especially with Melanie’s trunk), and Uncle Roger gets to go with her, but Gerard’s mother hands Gerard and his siblings their tickets, points them at the regular line, and tells them to meet them at the gate. He can’t help but be a little relieved. It’s at least a few minutes away from her, anyway.

“Where are we going, anyway?” Melanie asks as they join the slow-moving queue. She’s still clutching the bag Gerard got her two Christmases ago, which makes him happy in ways he can’t really explain.

“Dunno. Mum didn’t tell me.” Gerard pats down his pockets, trying to remember which one he shoved his passport in.

Martin, who’s already holding his shoes in one hand despite the fact that it’s going to be at least ten minutes before they’re at the point where that’s necessary, studies the ticket held in the other. His face lights up. “Oh, we’re flying into Katowice!”

“Where’s that?”

“It’s in the southern part of Poland, kind of near the Carpathian Mountains. It’s the largest city in Upper Silesia.” Martin’s eyes shine. “Granddad’s parents came from pretty near there.”

“We’ll have to poke around some, see if you’ve still got family there,” Gerard tells him. Martin’s never exactly been big on genealogy or anything like that, but still, he must be interested in knowing if he has family. Especially if it’s related to his grandfather. Actually, Gerard would be interested in meeting anyone related to the old man, too. A family that produced someone as kind as Martin has to be worth knowing.

Of course, they also produced Aunt Lily, so who knows.

They have a momentary delay at the security checkpoint, where they have to convince the guard on duty that they aren’t unaccompanied minors and that they really are meeting their parents at the gate; Gerard still isn’t sure she really believes them, but she lets them through with a dire warning about running on the premises and not losing their tickets or passports. There’s another delay while Melanie and Gerard painstakingly re-lace their boots, and then Martin hands him the various things he’s stuffed in his pockets in lieu of a carry-on bag and they’re off again. The corridors are crowded and confusing; the numbers make little sense, and Gerard isn’t entirely certain which way they’re even supposed to go to catch their plane.

“I think this place was designed by the Spiral,” he grumbles, dodging out of the way of a small child dragging a rolling backpack and clutching a teddy bear almost as big as she is. “Maximum confusion for minimum effort.”

Martin stops a man wearing a blazer and badge decreeing him to be a member of the airport staff and holds out his ticket. “Excuse me, can you tell us if we’re heading the right way, please?”

The employee asks them, again, if they’re traveling unaccompanied, and they again assure him that they aren’t. Gerard assumes there’s just some kind of policy regarding children and teenagers walking around without adults until they get to the right stretch of concourse and the tannoy crackles to life with the final call for their flight, at which point it occurs to him that if they’d been unaccompanied minors, they likely would have been able to ride in some kind of conveyance to get here faster.

They make it to the gate just in time, and although Melanie and Martin spend the entirety of their dash debating—bickering might be the better word—over which of them will take the responsibility for them being late, in the end, they don’t even need an excuse. The woman simply scans their tickets and waves them through, then shuts the door behind them.

The flight is nearly full, and even if it wasn’t, Gerard’s mother and Uncle Roger and Aunt Lily are sitting close enough to the front that they can’t miss the three of them squeezing past, mumbling apologies. There’s another embarrassing moment where the stewardess checks their tickets and discovers they’ve been booked into the exit row—Gerard is old enough to sit there, but Melanie and Martin aren’t—and then holds up the flight even further while she walks up and down the aisle trying to find someone willing and able to switch with them. There’s also a moment of worry when it looks like only Martin and Melanie will be allowed to move, but Melanie refuses to sit without both of her brothers. She’s very emphatic about that.

In the end, a couple in the very back row agrees to take the exit row and let them sit together. There’s not room to stow Martin’s backpack under the seat in front of him, so he quickly pulls out a thick blue book and hands the rest of the bag to the stewardess, who takes it to find somewhere to stow it while the three of them sit down. Gerard figures Melanie will want the window, but to his surprise, she insists on taking the middle. Martin silently gestures for Gerard to take the window, so, slightly bewildered, he does and buckles in for the safety briefing.

Truthfully, he more than half tunes it out. Most of it is intuitive, the rest of it is worst-case scenarios, and he’s flown before, after all, even if he doesn’t much like it. Short of one of the Fourteen attacking the plane, he doesn’t think there’s much he needs to worry about. Martin and Melanie, though, seem totally engrossed in the briefing.

The plane begins taxiing backwards. Gerard glances out the window, watching as the concourse rolls away, then feels the lightest of touches on the back of his hand. He turns his hand over automatically, and Melanie’s fingers wrap around his hand immediately and squeeze.

Surprised, Gerard turns to fully face her. She’s pressed as far back against the seat as possible, feet tucked back under her seat, clutching both Gerard’s and Martin’s hand. Beyond her, Martin sits absolutely still, shoulders and spine perfectly straight, his free hand curled around the other armrest. Both of them are staring directly at the backs of the seats in front of them. With a jolt, Gerard realizes they’re both scared.

“It’s okay,” he murmurs, keeping his voice as low as he can. “All that stuff, it’s just a precaution. It’s probably not going to happen.”

Martin shakes his head minutely but doesn’t speak, his lips pressed tightly together. Melanie shrinks back further into her seat, somehow. Gerard decides to forgo comforting words and just be there for them as best he can.

He tries to remember his first flight. Was he scared? Or was he just excited? Or was he even thinking about the flight? He was young—it was long before he met Martin even—and he can’t even remember where they were going. He also remembers falling asleep not long after the plane took off.

For the first time, he wonders if his mother drugged him to keep him from making a fuss.

They don’t exactly relax when the plane gets off the ground and seems to level out a bit, but they aren’t quite as rigid. Melanie lets go of their hands and slumps down in her seat, somehow picking up her feet and resting them on the cushion. Martin, for his part, tugs the book out of the seat pocket in front of him and cracks it open. Gerard cranes his head to see the title.

“Death On Board?” he hazards.

“It’s a collection of Agatha Christie mysteries,” Martin says without looking up.

The plane banks a turn, and Gerard can see the sprawl of a city, close enough he can see individual buildings but distant enough that he can’t make out details. It’s almost certainly not London, not with the direction they’re heading, but he can’t resist quipping, “I can see my house from here, look.”

“Urgh.” Melanie scrunches down further. Martin glances up from his book, seemingly involuntarily, and his face goes white. He quickly buries it back in his book.

At that, Gerard realizes what’s going on, and he feels absolutely horrible. “Sorry. As soon as we hit cruising altitude, I’ll shut the blind.”

“Thank you,” Martin mumbles.

Melanie fidgets with the ruffled skirt hem she’s wearing over her leggings. “Gerry? Can you get me my book so I don’t have to…”

“Look?” Gerard supplies. “No problem.” He bends over and snags her bag from where she’s tucked it under the seat in front of her, fishes out the Hans Christian Anderson book she’s had as long as he’s known her, and hands it to her. Taking a hint from them, he finds the Basil Copper novel he’s been reading in the pocket he stowed it in and settles back to read as well.

The stewardess makes Melanie get her feet off the seat and sit up properly, but for the most part, they’re left alone. At last, the overhead crackles to life as the captain announces they’ve reached cruising altitude and turns off the seatbelt sign. Immediately, Gerard closes his book, using a finger to mark his place, and tugs the shade down. Martin takes the first easy breath he’s taken since they boarded.

Melanie slides the bookmark into her own book and rests it on her lap, then looks up at Gerard. She’s scowling, but he can still see the worry in her eyes. “They’re not going to try that again on the way home, are they?”

Gerard frowns, trying to figure out what she means. “What, making us not sit together?”

“Making us sit in an exit row.”

“Oh. I dunno. We can double-check at the gate when we pick up our tickets home, I guess.” Gerard shrugs. “Maybe we’ll get lucky and they’ll let us get away with it if we say we’re triplets and you’re just small for your age.”

“No!” Melanie’s voice is sharp and slightly panicked. Martin nearly drops his book and quickly tucks the flap of the dust jacket in between the pages.

Gerard stares at her. “Why not? What’s wrong? We won’t—Neens, it’s really not very likely we’d need to be able to open it or anything. Planes are pretty safe these days.”

“I—I know, but—” Melanie bites her lip and looks from Gerard to Martin and back. “It’s just—you don’t normally fly places, and I heard Aunt Mary telling Mum that it’s all been arranged and it won’t touch anyone else, and then we were in the exit row and I just—I was, I was worried she was trying to sacrifice us to the Vast.”

Okay…that hadn’t occurred to him, but now that it has, Gerard has to admit it makes sense. His mother isn’t really interested in tying herself to a single entity, but if she found something that she was interested in trying—or worse, if she found something that was going to come after her and needed to placate it—she’s not above throwing all three of them to it if she can get away with it. And since Uncle Roger isn’t really…attuned to the Fourteen, it’s highly likely he’d never know precisely what happened to them. Depending on what his mother has—had—planned, he might not even remember them.

“They were talking about when we get there,” Martin says gently. “It’s why Aunt Mary and Mum said we can go off on our own—because they don’t want us hanging about when they’re doing…whatever they’re doing. I think it’s something to help Mum get better, maybe.” He pauses, then adds, “Which isn’t necessarily comforting, but at least it doesn’t involve chucking us off an airplane.”

Gerard blinks at Martin. “Wait, that wasn’t what you were worried about?”

“No. I just don’t like heights,” Martin confesses. “At least not—I don’t mind being in a building so much, but things like—like planes and roller coasters and—I don’t like knowing there’s not really anything much between me and the ground.”

“Oh.” Gerard leans over Melanie and squeezes Martin’s arm comfortingly. “Well, I’ll keep the shade down as long as I can, and when we’re on the descent you can close your eyes again. It’ll be okay.”

Martin gives Gerard a shy smile. “Thanks, Gerry.”

“Of course.” Gerard sits back. “Meanwhile. Now that we know where we’re going, what do we want to do when we get there?”

“We know where we’re landing,” Melanie corrects him. “We might be going anywhere from there.”

“We can run,” Gerard says. “Slip away from them the minute we get off the concourse, disappear into the countryside. Martin speaks Polish, he can translate for us. I can make us a pretty good living selling books. We’ll open up our own used book shop, sell nothing to do with the Fourteen. Few years down the line we’ll be able to buy a sheep farm and sell sweaters and socks made from wool spun off our very own ewes. We can change our names. They’ll never find us.”

Martin and Melanie are giggling so hard they can’t breathe by the time he gets to the end of this, which is kind of his goal. He chooses not to admit out loud how much he’d like for it to be true. Unfortunately, he’ll have to settle for it just being a vacation and then back to London.

Still. At least they can have this much.

#ollie writes fanfic #to find promise of peace (and the solace of rest)#tma fanfic #tma #gerard keay #martin blackwood #melanie king #flying tw #airports cw #emotional abuse cw #mention of sacrifice

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web-novel-polls · 1 year ago

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Tips for New Tournament Makers

Don't feel pressured to follow these to a T. You can do whatever you want forever, but I've been making polls for over a year and having a clear system and outline has really helped me.

Stages of a Tournament

Have a tournament idea & figure out the qualifications for contestants

Submissions - collect submissions for who or what will compete in the tournament. Google Forms are KING for this since you can edit questions if you forget something. Tip: if you have a propaganda question, make it a Long Form response instead of Short Answer.

Forming & Announcing a Bracket - To make the brackets themselves, I recommend BracketHQ and Challonge.com for standard brackets and Canva's whiteboard for non-standard brackets. Challonge has more features and is better for larger brackets you want to share with others. Bracket HQ is easier to understand/start out and to screenshot & edit the image if there's a tie. Canva has the most flexibility since you can straight up design the bracket entirely.

Releasing Polls - the Schedule feature is your friend. Space out individual polls, even if you're releasing a batch; the queue WILL post them out-of-order any chance it gets. I've heard "no less than 5 minutes between polls" as a rule of thumb, but whatever time frame works for you is fine.

Announcing Results

(You may want to decide what type of and big of a bracket you want before submissions since Double Elimination and large brackets take much longer and are harder to organize than a Round Robin or small Single Elimination tournament)

Organization

Figure out the bracket beforehand & write down an outline for when polls will come out. If running more than one tournament, I highly recommend using a google sheet for organization.

My first sheet shows everything "upcoming" in the queue, and once it's been posted, I move it to another sheet. I usually like to mark reminders with (R) to make sure I don't have two polls posting at the same time, and the "posted" column helps make a habit of checking the sheet. To freeze rows/columns, select the letter or number marking it > right click > view more row actions > freeze up to... Checkboxes are under "Insert."

Use a tag or tagging system, if possible. It makes finding polls and whatnot so much easier, especially if you put tag links in your pinned post or somewhere easily accessible.

Ex: #webnovel quotes tournament -> web-novel-polls.tumblr.com/tagged/webnovel%20quotes%20tournament

I like using masterposts (linked to my pinned post) & updating them with the bracket/schedule at least a few days before the polls are scheduled to start. It helps to have everything in one place & easily accessible.

Have a google doc with all the submissions and/or bracket prepared. It's helpful to have a section you can just copy & paste into Tumblr.

I have an outline for the polls of each round that's customized for what I need. The tags can be just copy-pasted starting with the first tag.

For larger brackets, I sometimes need separate docs for the full character list, the bracket, and whatever else, but putting the amount of submissions recorded at the top means I can check the google form responses without having to open 2 million google docs. Since the amount of responses on the Google form matches the submissions in the google doc preview, I don't have to open it, which saves more time than you'd think.

Interaction

Not everyone is online all the time, so reblog polls, submissions, whatever you want people to interact with! For polls, I reblog 24 hours before the poll is scheduled to end. For submissions, I cycle through what's open by reblogging whenever I have a relatively empty day. Some people also reblog 12 hours after a poll has begun to reach people in other time zones.

@ tournament-announcer - they(?) reblog submissions before a tournament starts (or for ongoing themed polls like "do you know this character?"); there might also be other themed blogs that'll reblog polls/submissions if you @ them or send an ask

Tumblr allegedly only uses the first 5 tags on a post (which I do NOT believe), so I usually tag the characters/fandom first, and then my organizational tags and tags to block.

Self Care

Remember: this is for fun! (Most Important Reminder; everything comes from this)

You make the rules. If you forget a poll or make a mistake, you can just change the schedule or whatever you need.

You'll sometimes get people who aren't happy with seeding, time frames, the amount of propaganda, etc. They are not entitled to anything. If you don't want to do something, don't.

HAVE FUN! If it no longer brings you joy, yeet it.

#not a poll #not a web novel #tips #tournament tips #tumblr tournaments #tumblr tournament tips #tournament running #tournament advice #web speaks #is this helpful? my brain is just NOT meant to understand brackets so I use a lot of stuff to make it work lol #there's also a huge community/communication aspect but Idk anything about that since I just started making polls and kept doing it #image id in alt

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yoonia · 2 years ago

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Hi dia!!! This is just a question bc I always see you when I'm online so I'm wondering if one of us is chornically online all the time or if you're close to my timezone haha but also whenever you say a time frame, for example, "on the weekend" I kind of have no idea if your weekend and my weekend are the same 😭😭 No need to answer this if you're not comfortable but are you on the Asian / European timezone?

Ooohh, that makes me wonder, but I might be a bit of both. I'm in Australian timezone, so if you're in Aussie or anywhere in Asia, then we do have similar timezones. Aside from when I'm answering these asks or post random stuff, my blog only runs in queue which I set up usually in the morning or when I have the time to sit down and line up everything

I usually open Tumblr about 5-10 minutes during my break (lunch or sometime between after dinner and before bedtime) just to scroll down and queue stuff, so you might see me as chronically online (which is mostly true anyway lmao). But you'll definitely notice when I'm too busy or when I'm offline completely LOL

It's already Saturday for me and I have both drafts for the Tae and Yoongi fic open. I'm focusing more on Tae's so I can finish editing it next Monday (which would be my monday)

#💌 for dia #Anonymous

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sunbloomdew · 2 years ago

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࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟwelcome to my blog!࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ

current interest: inazuma eleven series

askbox: almost always open! feel free to ask me about anything (within reason). keep things polite!

you can call me mei! i'm fine with any pronouns, except for she/her. po polsku można się do mnie zwracać byle jakimi zaimkami.

gadam tu po angielsku ale staram się wpleść tu trochę polskiego. :]

i talk about whatever i want, whenever i want (d'angelo wallace style lol). games, shows and movies, youtube vidoes, music, anime, manga, books, webtoons, fanfiction and art.

⸙͎｡˚⋆ 𓋼

picrew credit

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ina11 series sideblog: @wmiescieinazumy ⸙͎｡˚⋆ 𓋼

about me

polish 🇵🇱

speaks polish and english

part of the lgbtq+ community 🏳️‍🌈

NOT a minor

i am in a lot of fandoms, so chances are if you mention one to me, i will most likely at least know about it haha

⸙͎｡˚⋆ 𓋼

my tags

#sunbloom reblogs – all of the stuff i reblog

#sunbloom talks – my epic rambles about everything and nothing

#sunbloom's anime/manga rambles – pretty self-explanatory

#sunbloom draws – my amateur art! pls don't laugh

#gamer hours – for posts i make about games i play

#sunqueue – thingies in the queue!

#mei's asks - for answered questions and so on

#mei's kids - tag for my original characters <3

a rule i follow in life is that as long as you aren't hurting yourself or anybody else, you can do and be whatever you want.

⸙͎｡˚⋆ 𓋼

general information on how i operate on this blog

i block on sight if:

there is a slightest chance the account might be a bot (default pfp and background picture, default title/something nonsensical in the title, nothing in the bio)

the person running the account is most likely a shitty person (ex. racist, homophobic, transphobic, queerphobic in general, ableist, a TERF, a p*edo, you get the idea. and i say "most likely" because people usually won't list their wrongdoings in their bio but you can tell what they think ya know)

the person running the account uses ai pictures/writing generators and posts ai generated stuff as their own and/or believes ai should be a replacement of artists and writers entierly instead of a helping tool

the vibes are off lol. sometimes i just don't like your schtick dude

no hate or discrimination will be tolerated here. this is a safe space for everybody and i'll do my best to ensure that.

be kind and respectful ❤

⸙͎｡˚⋆ 𓋼

#sunbloom talks #introductions #<3

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windblooms · 5 years ago

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Hi!! Could you do headcanons of Diluc, Kayea, Childe and Zhongli with a s/o who is touch starved but is too shy to intimate physical affection please? Thank you!💙

decided to answer the two of these in the same ask since they have similar personalities for the reader, and they evolved into scenarios. hopefully what i’ve written is all right!

edit: to the second anon, i’m sorry, i don’t know how people write more than 500 characters in asks. ㅠㅠ is it maybe a submission . . . ?

childe:

as a very perceptive individual, childe would pick up on your hesitations relatively soon, however won’t say anything about them outright.

while he may ask you if something’s wrong whenever you reach out, but self-consciously pull away, or when you’re on the verge of words but can’t bring yourself to speak, he won’t pry into your meekness.

he knows that some people prefer to keep things to themselves or away from others – he’s a prime example of this himself. so he doesn’t want to push you, but will continue to keep mental tabs on when you shrink away, or backtrack after you sound as if you’re going to ask him something.

if the trend continues for a while, he’ll eventually sit down to talk with you about it. he’ll discuss with you patiently, not wanting to invade past things you might not want to share just yet, but he still tries to find the cause of your hesitancies so he can better understand you.

“there’s something bothering you, isn’t there?” he leans forward across the table, and rests his chin on his hand. “you can tell me, you know. i’ll try and help you with it.”

as you take your time to answer, he grows increasingly concerned, but still wears a poker face to not influence you as well. across the table, he’ll slowly reach out his hand as a means of comfort, and clasp yours when you don’t pull away.

you begin to speak about your uncertainties, and childe listens intently. ah, so that was it – now that you mention it, the two of you don’t hold hands much, or really touch each other. he had assumed that’s how you preferred it, little to no physical touch. but now that you’ve explained why you’ve concealed those wishes . . .

“i’d be more than willing to hold you.” childe’s words are soft, and he manages a small smile to encourage you. as soon as your face flushes, though, he can tell that there’s something else you want to say. so he pauses, expectant, but you still seem nervous.

he takes a gander and speaks. “we can start off slow, if you want . . . actually, anything you want, you can tell me. you don’t have to worry about being embarrassed.”

from there, the two of you work out what you want. you both agree to take it slow, since this will be a first for you; small touches against each other’s fingers as reassurance, and taps against his shoulder when you’re too nervous to outright ask for his attention. he also has something of his own to suggest:

“there’s some custom that mondstadtians have,” childe ponders aloud suddenly. “hm – something about tapping three times, meaning ‘i love you’?”

at his notion, you become bashful, and look down towards your lap. you know where he’s going with this, and at your reaction, the snezhnayan chuckles, unfolding his hands from atop each other to squeeze yours in demonstration.

“one, two, three. it’s just gonna be between us, all right?”

diluc:

diluc is arguably one of the most emotionally reserved characters in all of mondstadt. sure, he’s got a sense of dry humor and wit whenever he feels snarky enough, but when it comes to personal sentiments? he keeps them behind lock and key, with the exception of passive aggression.

if you’re self-conscious about asking for affection, such as when you’re about to reach out to tap at his hand yet pull back at the last instant, you find him looking at you expectatntly, his notorious half-lidded gaze fixated on you. if there’s something you want, you’ll ask for it is his mentality, since he assumes that the two of you are both comfortable enough in your relationship to do so. and relationships are built around trust. so why are you hesitating?

that is to say, he doesn’t stare at you until you crack. after a few seconds, he’ll look away, and resume whatever he was doing beforehand. if it were anyone else, he’d most likely ask them verbally what they want, since there’s no use in prolonging the time, and he’s an impatient man.

he makes a conscious effort to be more gentle with you. he can’t quite tell if you appreciate it though especially in these scenarios, since you always chew at your lip and refrain from looking at him afterwards.

diluc will only allude to these instances. he’ll ask “is there something you need?” or “is something the matter?” he has no experience with physical affection of any sort, at least since his father all those years ago. so he’d be quite lost with your circumstance; he doesn’t know at all what you want unless you make a verbal indication as to what it is.

one day, in the privacy of his office, he senses your fingers just near his forearm. diluc looks over in time to see you clasp his coat rather shakily, but your hold is there nonetheless. much like usual, he’ll peer at you with a half-lidded gaze, although this time he addresses how skittish you appear.

“something the matter?” he’ll say as per usual, but this time he isn’t vague; he’s referring to your sudden committance to reaching out as opposed to pulling away.

“ . . . just wanted to hold you.” your confession is a mere whisper, but your boyfriend still hears it. the two of you sit in silence for a bit, before he turns his body and puts his hand on the side of your head, pressing gently so that you lean flush against his arm.

you’re speechless, however the circumstance doesn’t need words anymore. content with you hugging his arm, and now understanding your wants, diluc continues to work as you drift asleep against him. while there’s still a ways to go, as he’s sure that this isn’t the only desire you have, it’s surely a start.

kaeya:

the astute captain that he is, kaeya can hone into your desires with relative ease.

before you can retract your hand after reaching out, he’s already grasped it in his own. you’re caught off-guard, not expecting his agility, but his grip isn’t firm or unpleasant; it’s gentle, as if he’s caring for glass.

he lowers his face so that the two of you are eye-level. “no need to be shy. it’s just us.” kaeya’s reassurance is playful at first, until your contemplative silence queues him in on the severity of your timidness.

he’s concerned: is there something serious that’s bothering you? he’d just assumed that you wanted to hold hands, or lean on each other. for how long it takes you to speak, he’s thinking the worst: is a coworker bothering you? are you ill with a fever? kaeya’s eyebrows furrow, and he immediately speaks again. “what’s wrong, precious? tell me, please.”

looking up at him, you realize that he has the wrong impression. tenderly enveloping your cheek with his hands, rubbing your skin with his thumbs, you sink into the affection – but he’s got the wrong idea.

“i-it’s fine,” you begin, and he blinks rapidly. “just . . . wanted to, uh,” you nudge further into his hands, and squeeze his arms gently, “ . . . touch you.”

ah. your meekness makes sense now, although considering your personality, his initial guesses probably wouldn’t have been far off. nevertheless, kaeya indulges you, even if you both continue the circumstance in silence. it’s evident that you’ve been holding back this request for a while, and as much as he loves to tease and would like to in this moment, he doesn’t believe now is an appropriate time.

so, kaeya continues to stroke your face, soothing away your nerves. his other hand clasps yours in your lap, giving you the time and affection you crave.

he finds your vulnerability endearing, but there’s guilt on his conscience: why have you been nervous to approach him about this, and why did he not pick up on it sooner? not that he expects you to come for him for everything – kaeya just theorizes that there must be some reason as to why you appear so touch-starved, and he’s thinking the worst about such a reason.

“feeling better?” he inquires, still cradling your face, and he pulls you into a hug. his warmth is reassuring to you – the security that you’ve longed for. if this is what affection feels like, you’re not sure that you’d ever want to pull away.

“yeah.” hesitantly, you lift your face from his chest, but your arms remain around his waist. your boyfriend grins slightly, and ruffles your hair, pushing your bangs aside so he can kiss your forehead.

“tell me about it. we can figure this out together.”

zhongli:

about three weeks into your relationship is when zhongli receives questions from hu tao: “hey, you and y/n don’t touch each other at all. i know you’re ‘professional’ and stuff, but jeez – not even hand-holding? thought it’d get more exciting at this point.”

and while he initially thought of her remarks as rude – your relationship isn’t any of her business – it did prompt him to consider her words.

specifically, she’s right: while he’s generally busy at wangsheng, he strives to make time for you whenever possible. and in that time, never once have either of you touched each other. he’s never minded, since he’s admittedly gone without it for so long and is used to life without it – but it’s the modern age, and isn’t it customary for liyuens to . . . ?

so he takes it upon himself to ask you over dinner. he’s made bamboo shoot soup for you tonight, and as you sit across the table from him, finishing the dish, he speaks so candidly it nearly makes you choke on your last bite.

“would you like to hold hands in the market tomorrow?”

“what?”

zhongli makes a strange face. he knows you heard him, so why do you also look startled, and are averting your eyes?

he repeats himself nonetheless, and while you do answer him this time, it’s by mumbling under your breath.

“ – odd question,” is how you start, and your boyfriend folds his hands underneath his face, yet doesn’t rest his chin. “um, sure. yeah, sure . . . ”

you most definitely do not sound sure, but it’s in a way that further perplexes him. you look . . . thrilled now? he can see that you’re refraining from smiling – the corners of your mouth flutter – but why? zhongli doesn’t recall saying anything that would be good news . . .

“is something the matter?” the archon supplies instead, to which you shake your head. your hands are in your lap.

“ah, no. what you said just came out of no where.” an unconcealed smile from you now, and zhongli finds himself relaxing. if you’re certain, that’s all he cares about.

he stands up, and prepares to take your dish to the kitchen. before though, he makes sure to bring you up to your feet, and intertwines his fingers with yours.

“may i kiss you?” he asks, suddenly, unexpectedly. he sees you nod, the slight pressing of your lips together, and gives them a quick peck before retreating; zhongli can still taste the slight bamboo left over.

when the two of you draw away, there’s a noticeable flush on your cheeks. once more, you seem giddy, however this time he doesn’t have to ask why.

“i’ve never done this before.” there’s trepidation in your voice that causes his brows to furrow slightly. “so . . . it’s all right if we start out slow, right?”

“of course,” zhongli doesn’t hesitate to respond. you could mean so many things, and he isn’t sure which you’re referring to: initiating physicality with him, or maybe that you’ve never had a partner before . . . ? but he doesn't dwell on that. “your comfort is what matters.”

in the market the next day, zhongli finds comfort in the slight tugs on his coat sleeve from your fingers, and the smile that beams on your visage.

#genshin impact x reader #childe x reader #diluc x reader #zhongli x reader #kaeya x reader #childe headcanons #childe scenarios #diluc headcanons #diluc scenarios #zhongli headcanons #zhongli scenarios #kaeya headcanons #kaeya scenarios #fluff #asks: diluc #asks: childe #asks: kaeya #asks: zhongli

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stopeatingwhales · 4 years ago

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"how come we've never spoken before?" x noel gallagher

why haven't I written anything for noel in ages??????? anyways this was so cute I hope u lot like it <33

Pairing: 1990! noel gallagher x reader

Warnings: none :)

Word count: 1.951

Requested by anon x

༉‧₊˚✧

“You wanna come over tonight?” Liam asked me as we were walking out of the sixth form building. “Our kids coming to pick us up so was wondering if you wanted to come with.”

“Yeah alright.” I nodded, linking my arm with Liam as we walked out of the gates together. Going over to the Gallagher residence wasn’t an uncommon matter, if anything I was over at theirs at least once a week. Since their father had left the environment was always pleasant, his mum always cooking the best, most delicious meals which caused your body to crave it again each and every day until you returned back for dinner once again. As well as that, being able to spend time with Liam was always an enjoyable experience - him being my best friend since first joining the college, we hadn’t been able to separate ourselves from each other since. Of course, we would have different friends, different groups, but we always turned back to each other - something that I adored most about our relationship; we didn’t constantly need to be with one another to consider each other our best friend. Whenever I was over we would relax in his room, talking about practically everything and everything, sometimes smoking a joint by his window to prevent his mum finding out, even though the stench of it would stick to our clothes like glue - giving it away instantaneously.

After exiting the school gates, we walked for a bit until we reached the nearest neighbourhood of houses, where Noel said he would pick Liam up. To waste the time, Liam brought out a spliff from his pocket, placing it between his lips, then lighting it, him failing a couple times to get the lighter to produce a flame. “Give me a hit,” I said, watching Liam as he quickly inhaled the roll of weed, then passing it to me, a wave of smoke hitting my face from Liam’s mouth. “Stop that you twat.”

There was hardly anybody outside, from the look of the area, merely just the occasional car whizzing past us, causing the empyrean of smoke discarded from our throats to diffuse into the atmosphere. It produced a clear contrast against the skies, which had little to no clouds visible at all. Having a clear, sunny day in Manchester wasn’t something ordinary; it was a rarity, but for the past year the weather had been brilliant, though brilliant becomes unlivable when the temperature continues to increase to the thirties, celsius wise. That’s when the nature of constant traffic, crowded streets and lengthy queues at the ice cream machine disperse into their homes - the sun being too strong it becomes a chore to leave the house. Having the world so silent, hushed, brings another kind of tranquillity to the mind. Watching an inanimate street fixated in the same position, as if it were a ghost-town, encompasses that feeling of being the only person present in the world at that moment, which makes you realise that the life you live is not lead to be controlled of dictated by others - it is yours, and it is something in which you hold complete control over.

After a couple minutes of small talk shared between me and Liam, a small car drove past us, stopping promptly as the windows rolled down, indicating that it was Noel. Me and Liam quickly rushed out of the sun that was beaming down at us, to get inside his car; Liam hopping in the passenger seat next to his brother whilst I occupied the middle seat in the back. “Hi Noel.” I said softly, smiling at him through the rear view mirror, our eyes connecting for a short second whilst he greeted me back, then turning to greet Liam before taking off. Mine and Noel’s relationship wasn’t anything special: we spoke here and there, but since he usually was occupied by hanging out with friends, or travelling as a groupie for Inspiral Carpets, we never conversed much. It was a mere relationship formulated from my closeness with Liam, as manners are important - even if Liam shows the opposite. I was quite intrigued by Noel disregarding his conventional absences; he seemed to lead a life which was exciting and alluring, and was a complete contrast against Liam’s persona from what I had noticed. Liam was more into sports, mainly football, and causing havoc wherever he could (me constantly joining him since he knew how to have an absolute good time), whilst Noel seemed completely consumed by music and the wonders of working with bands. Regardless, they shared some idiosyncrasies, one thing in particular definitely being their love for weed.

Once we arrived at the house, we were greeted by Liam’s mum, who welcomed me in lovingly. “Always a pleasure to have you over, Y/N,” she said as I broke away from the embrace we shared to allow me to take off my shoes. “Liam, I'm going to need you to help me in the kitchen today.” she then said to Liam, whose face then dropped in complete annoyance.

“Why?” he moaned in response, sighing at his mum whilst removing his shoes. “Y/N’s literally here!”

“Maybe because you haven’t done the washing up for over a week, Liam,” she responded, turning her gaze to look at me, rolling her eyes at his demeanour. “Y/N’s not going anywhere, it won’t take you a year.”

After we were able to get Liam to do his chores, I told him that I would be waiting upstairs for him, in his and Noel’s room. Once I went inside, I wandered around the medium-sized room, finding my way over to Noel’s side, especially fixated on the stack of records that he had owned, aligned by the table next to the record player. He had all sorts of bands; the Beatles, the Who, the Smiths, Sex Pistols... All the best artists. The more and more I found out about him the interest I had about him increased. He seemed like a cool older brother to have, and share a room with, even though Liam sees boys in bands quite odd - which is humorous, since he’s practically an entity of his own. Proceeding to pick up a vinyl by the Smiths, the album in particular being the Queen is Dead, I admired the cover whilst grasping it in my palms. The Smiths were the only band that seemed to use the most aimless, but oddy aesthetic images of random men as their album covers - most likely courtesy of Morrissey’s desires - though I suppose is one element which creates the artistic composition of the band, and their music. Snapping me out of the trance I was consumed in, a voice echoed in the room, one which was definitely not Liam’s. “Like what you see?”

Turning around to find out who it was, I was accosted by the sight of Noel, who was holding a warm mug of tea. Flustered, I placed the vinyl back in the stack before taking a seat on Liam’s bed. “Sorry,” I mumbled, looking at Noel whilst playing with my fingers in my lap.

View stuck on him, I watched him walk to his bedside table, placing his mug of tea on the coaster, then reaching out to grab the vinyl that was once embraced by my palms. “You like the Smiths?” he asked, his eyes now connecting to my gaze.

“Yeah I do,” I said, smiling slightly at his question. “That’s my favourite album of theirs actually.”

“Didn’t expect that from you,” He replied back, taking a sip from his mug of tea before taking the vinyl out of its sleeve and placing it on the record player, watching the needle intently as it gently dropped onto the black disc before sitting back on his bed. The title track’s intro then seeped into the silence of the room, paired by Noel humming along to it. “Think their debut was better, if I’m honest.”

“Well preference always matters,” I answered back, walking over to his bed to grab the vinyl sleeve, gazing at the lyric sheets, also taking a seat next to Noel. I felt his stare on me, but I attempted to ignore it as I focused on the little verses of poetry in one of the songs. “Morrissey is such a depressing writer.”

A laugh rumbled at his throat at my absentminded comment. Averting my gaze, I looked at Noel and smiled again. “I’m not wrong!”

“What else you into?” he asked me, curiosity laced in his tone as he diverted the topic.

“Everything else you listen to really, I looked through most of your vinyls,” I replied, watching Noel as his eyebrows furrowed together in shock, my smile widening as I felt my cheeks start to burn slightly - I had never thought that I’d be having a genuine conversation with Noel. “Especially the Beatles, Liam’s told me how much you love them.”

Noel was impressed, and it showed on his face quite evidently. “What’s your favourite album by them then?”

Looking away for a couple seconds, I thought of a response. “Probably Sergeant Peppers. Was their most innovative stuff, in my opinion at least.”

We continued to ramble on about music for a short while, Noel continuing to act excessively shocked whenever I had told him I had indeed listened or liked an artist he questioned. It was nice to finally discuss music with somebody since Liam was never really into it. “You’d never expect me to listen to all of this because I’m friends with a lunatic.”

Another laugh left Noel’s mouth, a smile stuck on his lips. “All he’s obsessed with is football, I don’t even get how you’re both mates.”

“Opposites attract.” I answered back, leaning back to have my back against the wall as we continued to talk. My cheeks began to hurt after a while of us chatting, due to the smile that was unable to leave my lips.

“How come we’ve never spoken properly before?” He asked, walking over to flip the vinyl to side B. “You’re cool.” he added in a mumble, almost as if he didn’t want it to be heard.

I felt blood slightly rush to my cheeks after the compliment fell from his lips, my top teeth clinging onto my bottom lip as a wave of nervousness washed over me. “Maybe because you’re always out.”

A hum of agreement rumbled from his throat as my eyes fixated themselves on the white ceiling. I could see that Noel was staring at me through my peripheral, which caused my cheeks to increase their redness, only slightly. “We should hang out sometime.”

Connecting eyes with him, I admired his dark brown orbs for a second, before I responded. “We should.”

Breaking our moment together, we were welcomed by an exhausted Liam rushing into the room, breathing heavily from his jog up the stairs. Falling onto the bed, me and Noel shared a moment of laughter as we simply stared at Liam’s state. “What’re you lot laughing about?”

Me and Noel turned to look at one another, sharing a gaze once again. There was a specific glint in his eyes which I marveled at, his face beaming at me, only causing me to reciprocate in the same manner. Our stare meant more than what it was, a certain tension was held between us that was felt by both participants. Especially for Noel, whose heart was pumping as if it were about to burst out of his chest, his cheeks a little flushed out of admiration for the girl sitting next to him. “Nothing.” we replied, giggling slightly as our eyes stayed glued on one another.

#noel gallagher x reader #noel gallagher #oasis #oasis band #Liam gallagher #britpop #nineties #my writing #90s #music #band imagines #fluff

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belphies-cuhm-sluht · 5 years ago

Note

Request!! I think this is in the lines of parenting but having a kid with lucifer 👉🏼👈🏼 I love him I’m such a simp

Pairing these two together because they’re pretty much the same thing. Thank you for requesting!

First Born (Lucifer x F!Reader)

WARNING : (Pregnancy, Babies, Children)

A child!? A baby?! You want one of those… those things? They’re messy and irritating and they have absolutely no use to him. Why? Why would you want to do that to yourself, why would you want to do that to him? Are his brothers not enough like children already? Go take care of one of them, they’ll gladly keep you busy with their child-like behavior, and you won’t even have to ask. Better yet, you could take care of Cerberus if you want to be motherly and nurture something. Please, be his guest. That’s one less thing that he’d have to jam pack into his daily schedule.

“It’s not for those reasons, Lucifer. I want a child with you, it’ll bring us closer. Don’t you think?” Was that a legitimate question that you’d like the answer to, because he was quite sure that you wouldn’t like what he had to say. He didn’t want to actually hurt your feelings, that wouldn’t be very gentlemanly of him, and he prided himself in being one of the more gentlemanly of his brothers, so he just shook his head, burying his face back in the work stack that Lord Diavolo had given him. If he just ignored you, you would leave and give up on the topic, that’s what usually worked with Mammon. What he wasn’t expecting was what you’d say next as you stood up from the chair, still smiling to yourself. “Well, I guess it’s too late to ask those questions anyway.”

What was that supposed to mean? His head snapped up from his desk, watching as you walked toward the door. Too late to ask those questions? He shook his head, grumbling to you as you reached the door. “That’s not very funny, Y/N. I don’t take jokes like that lightly.” He didn’t, it wasn’t something that you shouldn’t joke about, and he didn’t need that kind of stress when he was surrounded by it on the daily anyway, he thought you’d have enough common sense to respect that.

It wasn’t a joke though, and he found that out a month later. Yes, you had been telling him over and over that you weren’t joking at all, but of course, he didn’t want to believe it. The thought of a child repulsed him, it made him gag. What use would a child be to him, other than taking away the already sparse time that he had with you. They would be of no use at all, only a hindrance in your relationship.

You hadn’t gotten that god forsaken monthly waterfall of blood, and at first he thought that he had just miscalculated… but you usually got it at the same time every month. You weren’t complaining about cramps or the usual things that seemed to bother you, and unbeknownst to you, annoy the hell out of him. Now you were just… emotional? He didn’t understand it, not at all. It’s not that he knew nothing about women, he knew the basics, but this was all new to him.

When you had run into his office crying at one point, he was ready to kill someone. Who had hurt you? He’d handle them immediately. “I saw a picture of a kitten and it was just so cute!” Then you started sobbing, and… what the hell is your problem? Why are you crying so hysterically over a kitten? It’s an animal, what? Did you want one? Would that make you feel better? He doesn’t understand. Please explain to him what is going on. His eyes watched with nothing but confusion as you wiped your tears, smiling softly up at him and shaking your head. “Sorry about that. I’ll go.” And you did. You left just as quickly as you had entered, as if none of that had happened. You were giving him emotional whiplash.

He tried to find excuses for literally everything, and most things he could find excuses for. Not getting your period? It was just your body changing in reaction to the Devildom, he read that sometimes that happens, bodies change when they’re in a different setting or what not. You crying over almost anything and pretty much everything? Hormones are strange, women are strange emotional beings. Maybe you just like to cry a lot? Or maybe you just miss home and you’re crying about that and blaming it on other things.

Everything had a reason, everything had a logical explanation that pointed to everything but… pregnancy. That couldn’t happen, not just because he didn’t want it to happen, but because it just wasn’t biologically possible. Your bodies were two completely different things, different beings. It shouldn’t have happened. What he couldn’t find a reason for though was the now constant puking that seemed to hit you every day, the same time of day as if it was following its own schedule. Were you ill? No. Were you running a fever? No. Had you eaten something that had gone bad? No. What was wrong with you then? By the fifth day worry had set in. Was it a reaction to the Devildom? Had something happened? It had to be something, something that didn’t involve procreation.

So he took you back up to earth, played it off as a mini vacation, and for some reason, not that he wasn’t used to it at this point, but you cried, clinging onto his shoulder as you told him how excited you were. If he wasn’t so worried about your strange illness and your odd mood swings, he would have found it endearing. This also wasn’t an actual vacation, this was more of a trial and error experiment. See if you still threw up when you were on earth. Simple really, a hypothesis and a conclusion. If you stopped puking, he would keep you up on earth. If you kept puking, he would take you to the hospital to get you checked out.

He watched you closely as you cuddled next to him on the hotel bed, counting down the time. It would supposedly be happening soon, and his little experiment would either fail or succeed. Just like clockwork, as if on queue, you pulled out of his arms and ran to the bathroom, slamming the door shut, your body forcibly removing everything you had eaten that day. He didn’t waste a second, as soon as you had left the bathroom he was ready to take you to the hospital. Of course, Lucifer wasn’t stupid. He knew that this was a sign of pregnancy, but he wanted so badly for it to be anything but that, he needed to get an official diagnosis.

So it turned out that you weren’t joking, all of his excuses were wrong, and you were in fact… pregnant. First reaction? Get rid of it. Get it out. He doesn’t want that added responsibility. Of course, when he even began speaking those words you seemed so upset, so heartbroken, he immediately shut his mouth. The last thing he wanted to do was make you cry again, but seriously, why? Why do you want to keep it? Do you know how much work a child is? How expensive one is? Second reaction? How the hell is it going to work? How is it going to come out? Will it have his horns? Or will it be more like you? It could rip you to shreds. Demons, as you know, are much stronger than humans, surely that would still be true with a demon child. He was worried, of course, because he wasn’t about to lose the one person he actually loved to something that wasn’t even supposed to happen. Third reaction? Protect you at all costs. Not because you were carrying his child, he could care less about what happened to it. You were vulnerable though, far more fragile than you were before, and even then he would worry himself sick about you whenever you weren’t around. It would be far worse now. How was he supposed to focus on anything else when he had you to worry about even more?

As you grew, and his child grew, he became more possessive over you. His brothers weren’t allowed within five feet of you, worried that they might do something stupid and end up hurting you. He couldn’t deny the faint glow that pregnancy gave you, and the sense of pride that filled him knowing that it was his seed that brought on that glow. He still didn’t really take part in any of the pregnancy milestones though, he could honestly care less. Feeling it kick for the first time? So what? He could kick too, what’s so special about it? Hearing the heartbeat? Was that supposed to make him feel something other than disgust knowing that it was still living and thriving in your womb? Still though, if he saw you go to any of his brothers to talk about it he’d quickly pull you away. Why tell them about it? They don’t have to know. He’d bring you to his office and pretend to listen to all the things that you were excited about as he sat at his desk going over paperwork.

Once the child was born, he distanced himself, only willingly helping financially because it was sadly his responsibility to do so, and only actually interacting with his child when he really felt like you needed the help. Other than that, he was busy, happily taking on way more work than was good for him just to avoid having to hear the child cry. He hated it, he hated how much time it sucked out of you, time that you could have been spending with him if you had just listened to him. He wouldn’t even come up to the room at night, choosing to fall asleep at his desk just so he didn’t have to wake up in the middle of the night to hear it crying. The kid cried so much, it drove him crazy. You would blow it off, telling him that it was just what babies do, but then he’d just question what the use of a child is if all it does is cry. He could tell that you were exhausted, you clearly weren’t getting an adequate amount of sleep, but then again, you wanted this, not him, yet you still seemed happy, he didn’t understand you, or the strange maternal bond you felt with the child.

Over time though, you stopped bringing the child into his office. At first he was overjoyed by it, glad that he didn’t have to hear it or hear you making over it. Then you stopped coming to his office altogether, and although his pride wouldn’t allow him to admit it out loud, he missed seeing you. He even… missed seeing the child, because with the child was always you. He walked out of his office, his eyes immediately landing on the back of your head. You were sitting on the couch, your knees bunched up slightly for the child to lay against, seemingly happy for once considering he didn’t hear any crying. You were talking though, and he knew you weren’t talking to the baby. Then he saw someone's arms reach over and grab the child off your lap, holding it up in the air, even getting a… giggle out of it.

It was a sting to his pride, a pride that he had no idea existed up until now. Fatherly pride, and it made him nauseous, angry, and even… jealous? Hearing the child… his child… laugh for someone else, for one of his brothers, it didn’t sit right with him. Then there was you, smiling over to his brother while he was holding HIS child. He wouldn’t stand for it. It was crossing a very thin line that he had made before the child was even born. He had given the rules to his brothers to stay away from you, to stay away from his child. Had you… had you gone to his brothers though? That stung even worse.

He didn’t want to make a scene, he didn’t want to let on that he was feeling anything other than his usual indifference, but inside he was fuming. He walked over to where you sat, and at first you didn’t even look up at him, neither did Beel. Were you two ignoring him? He cleared his throat, getting the attention of you, Beel, and even the child, all three of you turning to look at him. “Y/N, I’d like a word with you for a moment, in my office, now. That’s not a request.” The way you smiled to Beel… was it his mind playing tricks on him, or was that the same smile you had given him when you had first started together? No, it couldn’t be. You wouldn’t do that to him. You leaned in to kiss the top of his son’s head, as if you were leaving him with Beel. “Bring him with you.”

“Who? Beel? I mean…” He couldn’t hold back the groan that escaped him, he didn’t have time for this. He reached down and grabbed the child from Beel, not expecting the child to actually try to reach back for his brother. The way that you laughed at his child’s reaction, like this was a normal thing, the way that Beel actually reached out to try to take the child back. That hurt worse than anything. He pulled his son back against his chest, holding onto him tightly as he walked back to his office. It felt foreign, actually holding him, and he had seemingly grown so much since the last time he had seen him. How long had it been?

You shut the door behind you quietly, moving over to grab the now fussy child out of his arms, his pride only being crushed more and more now. He had stopped crying immediately as soon as you grabbed him, clearly finding comfort in your arms rather than his own fathers. “What is it? Make it quick, it’s almost time for him to eat.” You sounded upset, irritated, and your eyes held the same emotions as you looked up at him. What was he supposed to say? That he didn’t want you around his brother anymore? Clearly you didn’t listen to him the first time he told you.

“What were you doing with Beel? Why was he holding him? I thought I told you to stay away from them.” He watched his child perk up at even the mention of his brother's name, taking a deep breath to try to control the anger that was so close to boiling over. He wouldn’t have his child, his son looking at anyone else as a father figure. You scoffed, rolling your eyes at him as you sat down in the chair across from his desk.

“Why do you care? Do you even know how old he is? Do you even know anything about him?” He clenched his teeth, shaking his head as he leaned against his desk. “You made it clear that you didn’t want anything to do with him. Don’t act shocked that someone else filled the shoes that you didn’t even want to try on, Lucifer.” What was that supposed to mean? He didn’t understand, yet the words irritated him. Filling the shoes? He could sense that your irritation was growing even more as you waited for him to respond, but he didn’t know what to say. For once, he didn’t have a response. So he just stared at you, waiting for you to elaborate further. “Six months, Lucifer. He’s six months old, and how many times have you held him? I can count on one hand how many times I’ve seen him in your arms. You haven’t been around for six months, and I get it. You didn’t want him, so I’m not going to force him on you. But I’m not going to deny help when it’s offered.”

Six months… had it really been that long? It didn’t seem like it, but with the way he’d sleep at his desk and wake up in the same spot, days seemed to blend. He didn’t even know what day it was anymore. That wasn’t even the worst part to him though, not at all. What really upset him, or, better yet pissed him off was that his brother had crossed the line that he had so clearly made. “You shouldn’t have accepted the help. This was your decision to make, you had options clearly given to you. My brother didn’t need to be dragged into this.” He moved back around to the other side of his desk, sitting in his chair and staring at you, his hands folded under his chin. “Tell him that you don’t need his help anymore. I… will be helping from now on.”

He didn’t want his own son to hate him, to loathe him like he did his own Father. That was the last thing he wanted, and he surely didn’t like the fact that his child would rather go to Beel than his own father. Let it be known though, he wasn’t doing this for you, and he wasn’t doing this for his child. He was doing it for himself, because his pride wouldn’t let it be done for any other reason than that.

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leejeongz · 4 years ago

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jealous treasure (asahi-junghwan)

🔅i’m gonna use another member in each one because it’s easier than making up a whole new person and explaining a bit about them for each one if that makes sense. but this is just for fun, it’s fictitious, remember that pls🔅

find the other members here

🌷 asahi:

“it’s wednesday” junkyu announced. it wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to say whatever was in his brain, but today the other boys decided to humour him a little and asked him to elaborate.

“we should wear pink” he clarified as if everyone should know. asahi rolled his eyes, you’d been pestering asahi to tell junkyu to watch mean girls since well, forever, and that now he’d finally watched it, he wouldn’t shut up about it.

“but you’re not wearing any pink” asahi pointed out after scanning his whole body.

junkyu corrected him by fetching the hoodie he was expecting to wear. it was a soft, baby pink colour, with a little heart on the pocket right in the middle. asahi recognised it straight away.

“where did you get that?” he asked. junkyu couldn’t lie, he’d been caught red handed.

“from your closet” he confessed “but you always wear it and i thought i might look cute in it, can i wear it just for one day?” he begged with pleading eyes.

“hm let me think” asahi put his hand to his chin with sarcasm written all over his face “no” he snatched it from junkyu’s hands. “why would you wear y/n’s hoodie anyway?” he asked

“i-” junkyu stuttered “i didn’t know it was theirs” he said while assessing the situation “but are you really jealous right now? i didn’t know you were the type” he laughed, drawing the attention of the other members.

“no” he scoffed, “i’m not jealous, i just don’t think that they would want you wearing their hoodie. you smell” he spat out, turning his back and heading for his room.

“someone call y/n” junkyu said, wanting you to hear what a jealous man your boyfriend really is.

“don’t you have something better to do, like finding your own pink hoodie, you know, like the one you never take off your own back?” asahi snaps back, referring to the infamous pink hoodie from junkyu’s trademark outfit. as he leaves the living room, asahi takes a hesitant sniff at the jumper, hoping junkyu hasn’t infected it with his scent so much so that it no longer smells of you.

🍄 yedam:

having been stuck inside your house for what felt like a year, you were grateful and willing to accept any invitation to leave. today’s invite came from your boyfriend, yedam, who’d recently been too busy working to come and see you, which was completely understandable. he’d asked if you’d like to join him and a few of his friends on a walk around a nearby park, you of course said yes.

with beautiful scenery came the chance to take beautiful pictures. noticing that your boyfriend was too preoccupied by the ice cream van, you asked one of his friends, jeongwoo, to take a picture of you by the fountain. he agreed and instructed you on how to pose so that it wouldn’t look awkward. you followed his advice and managed to get a few shots. you walked back over to jeongwoo, who innocently stood with your phone in his hand, when you saw your boyfriend come rushing over.

“what are you doing with their phone?” he questioned “they let you take photos of them?” he spat out in a hurt manner.

“yes…” jeongwoo replied before you stepped in.

“how much are they?” you asked, pointing in the ice cream van’s direction, not understanding what all the commotion was about.

“apparently they’re all out of ice cream” he mocked “but why did you let him take photos of you? that’s my job” he pouted with a soft tone to his voice.

“ooo our yedam is all soft for y/n” jeongwoo jeered which, judging by the look yedam gave back to him, was not appropriate. “it was just 3 pictures” jeongwoo clarified “the model isn’t that easy to work with anyway, they have no fresh ideas of their own to spice up my business” he scoffed jokingly while handing your phone back to you, causing yedam to finally crack a smile.

“⅕ stars, pictures came out wonky and the photographer is bossy, unlike my lovely yedam” you smiled, playing into the joke. it wasn’t long before yedam was back to his usual cheerful self and had also finally decided that an iced tea was a good substitute for ice cream too.

🧶doyoung:

there was a lot of things in your house that didn’t make sense, but the worst was definitely the paintings hung up in your room that you’d never gotten around to taking down, mainly because you couldn’t reach them but shhh. you’d always been too shy to ask doyoung, knowing he’d laugh at you and tease you for being too short to reach them, and given you hadn’t been together for that long, you weren’t sure how much you’d appreciate that being your first inside joke.

a friend of yours, jihoon, had come over to your house while doyoung was there, which wasn’t exactly an issue, he knew you and jihoon were friends and he respected that. the three of you often gossiped and gamed together, it was a common thing these days.

“i tell you this every time im here but those are so ugly y/n, please take them down” jihoon glanced up, locking eyes with the spooky man in the painting and shuddering.

“i can’t reach” you joked, forgetting your boyfriend was also there.

“i’ll do it then” jihoon announced, standing up and reaching each painting easily.

“i could have done that” doyoung whispered under his breath while staring at you. you turned to your left to see your boyfriend's unimpressed face. “why did you let him do it?” he questioned, seeming really quite angry.

“he offered, i wasn’t gonna say no” you defended yourself. jihoon took this as his queue to leave and take the artwork elsewhere, he didn’t know where, but anywhere was better than being in that room with you two.

“is it because of his big muscles? is it because you value his opinion more than mine?” doyoung asked, laughing at his own thoughts and how ridiculous they were but possibly true.

“no” you rolled your eyes before making eye contact again “its because he offered” you repeated.

“and if i offered?” he asked, expecting you to say that you would have declined.

“obviously i would have said yes” you replied, “they were horrible i don’t care who got them down i just wanted them gone”

“oh” he sat back and relaxed into the pillow “well i’m glad they’re gone. i didn’t like to say it, but they were creepy” he laughed with you. “the next thing to go is him though” he joked, seeing jihoon walk back into your room, which of course was replied to with a scoff from your sassy friend.

💥haruto:

your sleeping pattern was well and truly out of the window, so you decided to stay up and call one of your friends that you knew would be awake, hyunsuk. he was just like you, you both slept at 4am and woke up at 2pm, so he wasn’t that shocked when you called, wide awake like him.

“where’s haruto? wasn’t he supposed to be staying at your place tonight?” he asked, genuinely concerned about his friend. you flipped the camera to show your bed, where a certain sleepy haruto lay, peacefully entering dreamland. “he’s so cute” hyunsuk giggled, you cooed in agreeance, he really was the cutest.

you stayed on call for about an hour. you were currently laughing about the tiktok he’d just sent to you, your humour was exactly the same too so it’s wasn’t hard for you to crack the other up. all the commotion woke your boyfriend, whose bed head was clearly visible in the reflection of your opened laptop when he sat up.

“did we wake you?” hyunsuk laughed upon hearing a groan from his friend.

“we?” haruto responded in a sleepy voice. “who’s we?”

“uhh us” you pointed between you and the phone.

“y/n? hyunsuk?” he snapped out of his sleepy state quickly. “why are you two up at this time and on the phone together?” you looked at hyunsuk on the screen and smiled, trying to hold in your laughter. “turn that off and come to bed, i want cuddles, and i want you to get some sleep, unlike him” he flung himself back at the bed, only inches away from hitting his head on the headboard.

“wait for me” hyunsuk joked in a teasing tone.

“no, not you” haruto whined. “just y/n please” he smiled closing his eyes and opening his arms, ready for you to join him.

“i guess this is goodnight then” you said to hyunsuk, which haruto followed up with a goodnight for his friend too before you put the phone down.

“now, cuddles please!”

♟jeongwoo:

for jaehyuk’s birthday this year, he asked for a small gathering, just close friends, which you of course are included in since you and jeongwoo had been together for over 2 years now. when you arrived, you quickly gauged the atmosphere of the party was pretty light and fun, it wasn’t oppressive in the slightest. usually parties you attended were fully kitted out with loud music, dimly lit rooms and a bunch of strangers in every room, instead your friends were in the living room, just chatting and laughing.

“you came!” jaehyuk screeched, running over to hug you. “oh and you bought a plus one, jeongwoo” he joked around with your boyfriend, who just rolled his eyes in response.

it wasn’t long before the boys delved into the games cupboard and pulled out the “who’s most likely to” box. the oldest of the boys shuffled the cards and took the top one which read “who’s the funniest”. whenever you played, this one always seemed to come out first, so you changed your answer every time to please everyone.

you turned around your board with the name “jaehyuk” written on it. your eyes scanned the room to see almost everyone had his name written on their boards, probably because it was his party after all. you quickly diverted your eyes away, however, when you saw that jeongwoo had written your name, which should have made you feel happy but instead, you felt quite guilty for not writing his.

the game went on, and your name wasn’t written on jeongwoo’s board ever again, despite you putting his for almost everything positive. the rest of the evening, jeongwoo didn’t come near you at all, everyone noticed, everyone questioned it, it was so obvious that he was jealous, but there was no way he was admitting to it.

as you got ready to leave, you glanced over at the boy who was supposed to be staying with you tonight, sat firmly in his place on the sofa.

“jeongwoo, aren’t you coming?” you shouted from the door. “jaehyuk is staying here so you don’t have to worry about him” you teased, everyone else smiling at you and giggling silently.

“fine” he grunted. you made up on the way home, he couldn’t even remember how it all started, he just “wanted to make a point” which, sure, he did.

🌍junghwan:

you and junghwan never got to spend much time together before you became friends with the members since he was always with them or at school, which is why he’s never complained or showed any jealousy when you are with them.

today you headed over to their dorms to relax and play when you remembered, today was the day of junghwan’s english exam. you pulled out your phone and dropped him a quick good luck text before continuing your journey.

yoshi brought you up to his room where he said you could chill for a bit since everyone else was still sleeping, other than those who had school of course. yoshi began to ask you lots of questions, you learnt a lot about each other in that hour or so, and the conversation was flowing so well that you didn’t hear the door.

“y/n, you did remember?!” junghwan asked excitedly, clapping his hands while smiling from ear to ear. “you came all the way here to see me after i finished?”

“remember what?” you asked, bewildered. “your exam? yeah i sent you a text, i’m sorry i didn’t realise until i was over half way here else i would have gone to see you first” you confessed, feeling guilty. his face dropped at your honest words.

“you mean you came all the way here just to see yoshi?” he asked. “everyone else was in the kitchen, but you two were in here… alone…?” disappointed in your reasoning and forgetfulness, he slowly backed out of the room. he wanted to cry, but he couldn’t. he wanted to feel sad and upset, but did you really do anything wrong, he thought. “you couldn’t have just turned around and gone home”

“well i didn’t want to, i wanted to see my friends. i didn’t realise that most of them didn’t get up until the afternoon” you walked closer to him, praying that he didn’t try and get away. “i’m sorry i forgot about your exam”

he shuffled closer to you. you’d never argued before, and he wasn’t sure how to respond, so he hoped a hug would go down well. as he hugged you, he whispered his own apology into you hair “i’m sorry for jumping to conclusions”

#treasure #treasure reactions #treasure imagines #asahi #yedam #bang yedam #doyoung #haruto #jeongwoo #junghwan

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blu-joons · 4 years ago

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DATING MONSTA X HEADCANON A⇴Z ⇴ Chae Hyungwon

A ⇴ AFFECTION

At any point in the day, Hyungwon will come to you for affection. If he’s feeling sleepy or needy especially, he’ll often lay in your lap as a call for you to pay attention to you, usually settling there for quite some time.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

The way the two of you met was all a little bit cliché. Hyungwon accidentally bumped into you whilst you were waiting in queue at a clothing store. He was quick to apologise over and over again, even offering to pay for what you bought to say sorry, but after you met his eyes, you told him coffee together would do the trick.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

Hyungwon was quite a quiet character anyway, but the day he chose to confess, you could almost hear a pin drop between the two of you. He was terrified of rejection; he didn’t want to get things wrong and end up ruining your friendship. When you eventually pushed him into telling you what was going on, you couldn’t believe how nervous he had become, especially when you felt the same way as he did all along.

D ⇴ DATES

Your dates varied a lot, neither of you had one thing that you particularly liked to do on a date night. A lot of your dates depended on your schedules and how much time you had, some nights the only answer would be an hour together with a takeout between you both, but that was alright. The two of you spoke often about how you wanted to just make the most of the time you spent together as opposed to how you spent that time. Takeout and a lazy night quickly became a favourite date night for you both.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

It’s well known that Hyungwon was in a long-term relationship previously, so he’ll definitely know how to treat a woman. He’s also not afraid of publicly dating, he knows he has the company’s backing to date which makes life a lot easier for him too. In the early stages of your relationship, he was a little nervous, it had been a while for him since he was last in a relationship, but as the two of you move forwards, he remembers all the things he loves about being in a relationship and loves to show you off to the fans too.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

The two of you very rarely argue, you’re both quite calm people, it takes a lot for the both of you to argue with one another. So much so, that you usually end up talking more about the arguments you have with other people rather than each other. You’d often sit up with each other late at night and vent about the problems you had with other people. Arguments between the two of you were very rare as neither of you were confrontational people, to most people looking in on the two of you, it felt like the two of you really did have the perfect relationship as the two of you always got on like the best of friends.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

His family were very keen to meet you as Hyungwon made no secret of how much he liked you. They had high expectations, but thankfully you far exceeded them when you met them. They’d never see Hyungwon as happy as when he was with you which was all they ever wanted for him, to see him with a smile.

H ⇴ HOME

Being one of the younger members, Hyungwon was a little reluctant to move out of the dorm. He didn’t want to rush into moving out just in case anything did go wrong. You were always very understanding of how cautious he was, and besides, you loved spending time at the dorm with the other members too.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

Hyungwon was the first to say, ‘I love you,’ one evening just before you went to sleep. You weren’t expecting it at all, and if he was honest, he was sure that you were asleep, so when your eyes fluttered open and stared across at him, he didn’t quite know how to react or what to do, looking away from your wide smile.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

He knows that he’s not the loudest person in the room, so he’ll often use physical touch to make sure that he has your attention. Hyungwon isn’t someone who gets jealous easily, he’s comfortable in his relationship and he’s incredibly trusting that even though you might sometimes talk to someone else, he’s the one for you. There are definitely times when he can feel himself begin to get jealous, but he’s good at handling his behaviour and remaining calm, and if he feels like he needs to, he’ll talk to you about it after.

K ⇴ KIDS

Having a family still feels a little way off for Hyungwon just yet, he’d love to one day, especially with you, but he has plenty of other things that he wants to achieve before then. The two of you are very open with how you see your futures going, and nine times out of ten the two of you tend to be on the same track. Having children is definitely something the two of you dream about and agree that in a few years it might be a possibility.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

Hyungwon will often make you laugh without even realising that he’s doing. He’s not as much as a jokester as some of the other members, but his facial expressions will often make you chuckle when someone else is talking. When the two of you are alone, he gains a little more confidence in trying to make you laugh by being a fool. He wants to make you smile more than anything else, that’s his main goal in being by your side, so as long as he’s doing that, then he’s a happy man, and an even happier boyfriend.

M ⇴ MISSING

He’s quiet anyway, but he will be silent on tour whenever he’s missing you. The boys will all rally around him quickly when he’s missing you and try hard to cheer him up. They’ll also often tell you how he’s coping as he tends to put on a brave face for you. Every morning when he wakes up, he checks his phone to see if there is a message from you, then he’ll check the date, and remember how many days there are until the flight home. It’s his best way of coping, knowing that each day when he wakes up, he’s one day closer to waking up with you beside him again. Whenever you call him, you’ll always let him know what the boys have told you and try your best to reassure him and pick up his down mood.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

Hyungwon loves to call you ‘love.’ There are a few other nicknames that sometimes appear, but that’s the main one he loves to use as he feels that it perfectly sums up his feelings for you, that he loves you.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

In the same way you are with his, Hyungwon is obsessed with your lips. He loves to kiss them, or feel them trail along his body, wherever that may be.

P ⇴ PDA

Affection is quite common from Hyungwon in public, it’s often his preference over being vocal around you. Most of the time you’ll feel his hand rest somewhere against your body, it’s a great comfort for him to have you there, and he also likes to make sure that he knows where you are as often as possible so he can care for you.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

Whenever a new meme appears of him, he’ll always be quick to ask you if you’ve seen it. Most of the time you definitely will have done because you love to tease him about them, but you’ll still make him show you so you can watch them again.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

Every time that Hyungwon goes away on tour, he steals something from your wardrobe and wears it during every show. It’s usual something small and subtle as a lot of your wardrobe is too small for him. He never tells you when he does it though, you’ll just open your wardrobe one day to try and find the hat you like only for it not to be there. Straight away, you’ll always know exactly who the culprit was for it going missing.

S ⇴ SEX

His lips work hard during intimacy, either by whispering sweet nothings into your ear or working their way along your body with kisses. Hyungwon is very much in tune with the fact his lips are a massive tun on for you and will definitely use that to his advantage when he’s close to you. He’s always very affectionate and very slow, he loves to take his time with you and make sure he appreciates every part of your body.

T ⇴ TEXTS

Hyungwon will often text you throughout the day to see how you are. He loves knowing what you’re up to and what your plans are and will often try and organise a surprise visit in amongst your hectic days to see you.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

He loves how well you’ve become a part of his family, not just by his side, but with his family too. He was scared to love for a long time, but you reminded him how special it could be and how important it was in life.

V ⇴ VACATION

Hyungwon loves to travel and having you to travel with now makes things a lot more special. Any time he can get you to travel with him, he’ll bring you along and make sure to show you as much of the world as possible. Exploring is one of his favourite things in the world and getting to do it with you too makes it a whole lot more fun.

W ⇴ WHINING

If he can’t sleep at night, that’s when Hyungwon will moan the most. He turns to you to try and help him sleep and try and comfort how busy his mind is.

X ⇴ XXXXX

Again, you’re a big fan of his lips, and he will definitely use them often to shower you with affection. Similarly, you know how much he loves your lips too, so you’ll often kiss him when he least expects it, creeping up behind him. Your kisses together are always full of a lot of love and passion, neither of you are fans of quick pecks or meaningless kisses, you’d rather savour those moments to create a much more powerful and meaningful kiss.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were everything to Hyungwon, the perfect distraction that he needed.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

He sleeps, a lot, and he loves to have you beside him whilst he sleeps. You’ll often end up having to wriggle out of his grasp at some point because he holds you so tightly for so long, but somehow Hyungwon will never even stir.

---

Masterlist

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donaidk · 4 years ago

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False Confidence - Chapter Ten

I had to cut the real chapter in two because it was way too long, than managed to make it just as long as it was before again. So I'm sorry for the long read 😂 There's also gonna be an 11th chapter, which is the last planned one. There might be bonus chapters or little snippets of their future, but I'm not sure yet 😊 Hope you guys will enjoy this one and have a great evening 🧡

Inspiration song

Masterlist | Taglist/Queue | Request

Chapter Nine | You’re here | Chapter Eleven

The heartbreak of Bahrain was soon followed by Lewis testing positive for Covid and everyone running around like headless chickens, trying to sort everything out. Seeing George in Mercedes clothing a few days later was still strange, even though all of us knew it was coming the moment Lewis had to step aside. It felt natural but strange at the same time, whenever we crossed paths in the paddock and my eyes were searching for the Williams shirt whenever he was standing next to Nicky and Jack.

That strange feeling followed us right into the weekend, sticking to every step we took. It didn’t help that I still felt uncomfortable around the car after that incident and seeing how wrong it could have gone. I also decided to mention it publicly, standing up for anyone who still couldn’t just forget everything but felt like they couldn’t talk about it. Showing weakness wasn’t a huge part of this sport’s daily routine. A few people immediately questioned my mental strength but my performance the next day showed them otherwise luckily. While the practice sessions went quite well as I somehow found even more speed than usual, it never came out in Qualifying. I got stuck in Q2 and just couldn’t get to the level that we were on during Friday and the morning. P11 was still a good position for points, but with P4s throughout practice sessions, we thought we would get to fight for another podium. Dan had a bigger chance for it, but we all knew it would still be a struggle for him to get up there and also stay there for the remaining laps.

The paddock somehow felt strangely empty compared to other weekends when I entered on Sunday. We all knew who everyone would be looking at for the sessions, but it was astonishing to see how all the cameras were turned towards George every time he showed up. I couldn’t blame them though, we were just as amazed and excited by this change as the fans and the media were. Maybe even more as we knew him a bit more personally and saw how much he deserves to try himself in a Mercedes. I also didn’t mind that all the hype was around him for once, as he deserved it and also gave us a bit of a breather from them always following everyone around the pitlane and paddock. It also carried onto the track with most of the discussion either being about him or involving him, which was also understandable.

Luckily from the moment we got into the cars that energy didn’t follow us and everyone was left with their own little beast and thoughts. It didn’t matter who was in which car, as everyone was your usual opponent and media attention given to one person will not give any kind of advantage to anyone. It was prior to the start of the formation lap when I turned the wheel a bit while looking down at it when I spotted a little sticker behind it. The text on it made me smile but I wondered if it got there thanks to the team or someone else. It had my tiny sunflower sticker, making me suspicious about Dan, although I knew he wouldn’t have had time to do it between the time I looked at the car the last time and the time I got inside.

“ Who’s the sticker from? ” I asked as soon as I took a turn and had a bit of free time on the straight to speak to Aaron. He usually let me get my focus fully back during these laps, but I felt like this wouldn’t change or mess up anything.

“ Lando. Almost got his ass whooped when he came into the garage. ” I got an answer back immediately and I could hear the little chuckle in Aaron’s voice. That must have been a sight, when Lando tried to sneak to my car and then got caught. “ Took you some time to see it finally. ” He added, with a real laugh following his words but getting caught off.

I could remember the first day when I dared to mention to the media how getting back into the car and racing felt a bit strange after the last race and then I went to Lando when they started picking my words apart. Most people thought I wasn’t ready to take part in F1 if something like that brought my confidence down, but somehow it couldn’t really get to me. I wasn’t happy about it and Lando listening to me and giving me advice helped a lot, getting me back to my balance in a few hours. He was the one who told me I shouldn’t follow other people's opinion about me or the team or the car, because I’m not owned by any of them. Which was now on a sticker right in front of my hand, reminding me that whatever others think should not take up space in my head and does not have to be my real end goal.

“ I usually drive with my eyes on the road and not the steering wheel. ” I rolled my eyes a little, focusing on getting the right grid spot and stopping the wheels on the yellow line, before I had a few seconds to lean back and take a deep breath.

Aaron stayed silent from then on, letting me focus on the lights and switching both of us into the usual race mood and mindset. Everything was fun and jokes until it was just seconds away from the lights coming up and then turning off. In the next second my hand was back on the wheel and with one last glance at the sticker my eyes snapped back onto the five lights that lit up after each other and then turned off, signaling all of us that the race is on as everyone took off. Seeing Dan shoot off of his spot on the grid made me smile for a second, before I could see the car next to me getting a bit closer than I felt comfortable with and had to quickly rethink my starting plan to get into a safe spot and keep my position. Instead, making my mind up in just a few seconds I pushed my foot down and ended up in 8th, safe and sound for the next 20 odd laps.

I could see Dan up in the front running at a few turns but when his strategy had him enter the pits I took his position right until it was my turn to take a pit stop finally. Doing a one stop strategy meant that even though I lost a bit of time and a few positions, it was easy to get them back when the others took their second stop, getting out of my way. Only Nicky and Lance were on the same strategy, the latter right in front of me, until his one took longer and I got in front of him just by a few thousands of a second. None of us anticipated the stint going so well and then just as I felt both surprised and hopeful by a chance at a podium place, George fell out from in front of me, giving me P2 in the process. As much as I fought my way up the grid to be in the top 5, it felt unfair to get to second by someone else getting unlucky once and then a second time not long after.

As much as I wanted to focus on keeping my P2 from Lance behind me it was hard to forget about George, who had so much to lose today. Aaron kept my head cool, distracting me from anything that wasn’t in connection with my own driving. It felt like I was flying as I almost got to lead the race behind Sergio so comfortably after a season that was never easy to fight through. Crossing the line in that same position still felt ecstatic even though there was a sour aftertaste in my mouth every time the thought of stepping onto the podium without George went through my mind.

“ Welcome to your first F1 podium procedure, Winola. ” Aaron’s voice over the radio caught my attention and I couldn’t hold back the smile that got onto my face. As much as I was disappointed for George, I knew the team deserved this podium just as much for their hard and relentless work over the weekends. “ I’m sure you will have no problem finding that P2 sign in the pit lane. ” He added, making me thank both him and the whole team as we took one last lap around the circuit to cool down the cars and get back to the pit entrance.

A few seconds later Dan passed me, holding a hand and then his thumb up for me which I copied, keeping up with his pace for a bit before he got in front of me to let others pass. A few cars later I could see Lando’s orange McLaren approaching, aiming for the space next to me. Still following the cool down plans I first sped up a bit putting a gap between the two of us, before slowing down, both in limits of course, as he tried keeping up with the new pace, making him overshoot the space next to me and ending up almost a full car length in front of me. I already had a smile on my face which just got wider during the cat-mouse game I started and then turned into a chuckle as I could see him lift his fist into the air, holding himself back from showing me his middle finger. It would have been deserved too. In the end I gave up, getting myself next to him waving as Lando turned his head towards me and shook it, probably with a smile hiding behind his visor.

While he went with all the other cars I followed Lance’s pink car to the boards, and parked right behind the one that had ‘P2’ printed right across it. After turning everything off, I just sat there for a few seconds with my hands coming up onto the visor of my helmet as I slowly realised what actually happened. I got my head wrapped around my thoughts for a second, before finally getting out of the car. I put the steering wheel back into its place before I let the bodywork hold my weight easily until I jumped off, punching my fist into the air and running to the team immediately. For a split second I thought I would faceplant from the force with which I started running, but luckily a few mechanics caught me before I could embarrass myself in front of the cameras. This second place felt like a win as I got pulled into tight hugs and were met with fistbumps and slaps to my back or helmet. I could feel when Dan arrived at the group hug, almost pushing me off my feet but luckily catching me before I could compensate for the missed faceplant. I thought my face would split into two with my widened grin as he pushed up my visor, the only shield that saved me from everyone knowing I was already crying.

“ I knew it. I told you that you would cry. ” He laughed at me the second he looked through the slot in my helmet, giving it a pat after his words, making me shake my head. He brought me back to the memories we made at the start of the season, making me realise how far we have actually come. “ It’s okay, we all do it. Even if we deny it. ” He shrugged a little, pulling me back into a hug, before the team pulled me away again.

I was soon ushered to the little stand where I could put down my helmet and gloves before finally having a drink. I got to get my interview done second, the whole setting a bit awkward as I never got to experience it before. By the time I finally warmed up to the task we were already done, getting to walk back to my stand until everyone was ready for the podium ceremony. I almost reached my destination when I was pulled back by my arm and enveloped in a hug immediately. I let out a squeal from the surprise that rushed through my body from the force of someone yanking me, but as soon as I realised it was Lando it turned into a chuckle. The first time it actually hit me how tired I felt, was when my body relaxed into his embrace, with my head falling onto his shoulder.

“ I guess the sticker brought you some luck? ” He asked, pushing me back a little, even though I would have gladly let him take my weight, giving me a bit more time to rest. I looked up at him as soon as there was a bit of space between us and and I only had to bend my neck back a little. He wasn’t tall, but then there’s my height that could never actually be called height.

“ It did, thank you. I still can’t really believe it. ” I shook my head a little, letting go of his arm when I realised I was still holding onto him, after getting my balance back. “ This is so bizarre. I feel like I took someone’s place just out of nowhere. ” I let out a sigh, looking around as Checo was still answering some questions and the others slowly getting back to their teams.

“ You took your place. It was waiting just for you, and never let anyone take away from it. You don’t owe them anything. ” Lando answered immediately, repeating similar words to his ‘They don’t own you’ sticker, before the both of us got ushered inside where we would have to part ways. His words stunned me so much that I couldn’t react in time, just let myself get pulled into another hug before he had to get back to his team.

What Lando said stayed with me throughout our wait for the ceremony to start and did not let my stomach calm down. I already had too many feelings swirling around in my gut and it didn’t help when it was time for us to finally get out onto the balcony and take our places on the podium. I already had a few tears in my eyes, chalking them up to the AC inside the building, when it was my turn to walk out and take those two meaningful steps onto the second place of the podium, looking over the crowd of F1 members in front of us. Even though it was my first ever F1 podium ceremony, my eyes were still missing the fans, although I had nothing to compare it to as F2 and F3 podiums were really different.

We waited for Checho to get onto the highest step, clapping for him until everyone stood still to listen to the anthems. As much as I wanted to one day hear mine, right now I was content with what I managed to achieve. Putting the yellow/black cap back onto my head I watched as Checo and their chosen Racing Point employee took their trophies before it was my turn to receive the tiny bit smaller version of it. With a grin taking over my face I stepped forward, making sure I didn’t drop the prize as it still felt huge in my hands, and raising my arm into the hand celebrated with the team even if they couldn’t come closer just yet. While Lance celebrated a bit as well I was already opening up my champagne in order to start spraying the others as soon as the music started. As much as they could have celebrated alone as a team, with both Lance and Checo getting onto the podium, before I could even think about turning away from them their bottles were already aimed at me and I couldn’t hold back my squeal when the cold liquid hit my face and neck.

I was drenched in champagne in just a few seconds, wincing away from the constant attack they started on me. When they turned away from me finally I sprayed them back and then turned towards the crowd and let the champagne go over them even though I knew it would probably not reach them. Stepping back I gladly clinked my bottle to the others’, taking a gulp from it even though champagne wasn’t my drink and my face did scrunch up immediately after the bottle left my lips. I almost stumbled forward with the force that Lance's hand landed on my back in a congratulatory slap that made the both of us laugh in the end, high on adrenaline as the alcohol didn’t yet have time to get into our blood.

Lil met me at the exit of the building, leading me right to the team who were already waiting, silently to my surprise. This changed as soon as I came into their sight, all of them screaming and pulling me into a group hug. I could only hug my trophy closer to make sure it was safe from people bumping into me as the group started jumping up and down. As much as I would have loved to stay and celebrate with them all day long, I had to give my trophy up to one of them after a few photos and leave for the media pen. The knowledge that we had the remaining day after my interviews to celebrate today’s outcome was the only thing that held me back from sticking with the team. We caught Dan for a few seconds as he was leaving with Aurélie and I was entering the pen, and it was perfectly enough time for him to pick me up and spin me around. I felt dizzy and a bit out of breath by the time I could finally feel the ground under my feet again, but I had to get to the sport and didn’t really have to time to calm down before I was already face to face with one of my favourite interviewers.

“ Well, that looked like a fun race to take part in. ” She exclaimed, her excitement just adding even more onto mine. “ How was it from the inside? ” She asked, giving me all the time I needed to get my breath and words together.

“ What gave it away? ” I joked about her first question, the both of us sharing a quick laugh. “ But yes, saying it was enjoyable is an understatement. We gave it our all, as the season is almost over, and it finally worked out. Everyone always worked their ass off to give Dan and I a strategy that could get us either a podium or points, and this weekend everything fell into its place finally. ” I was shaking my head as it still couldn’t wrap itself around the fact that I reached this milestone in my first season.

“ A picture perfect end to the year then? Maybe some motivation for next season with the rebranding and the new car? ” She asked, with the same genuine excitement I always saw on her face whenever we got a few minutes to talk.

“ There’s always something that we can improve on, mostly getting Dan to share a podium with me as well, but I guess that will have to stay for the future. Although Abu Dhabi could still surprise us. ” I shrugged a little, not totally believing my own words, but it was perfect daydreaming material. “ But I’m happy with how this race turned out, and it for sure will give me some much needed confidence inside the car. I feel like we have come a long way since February and it’s also not the end of the road. That’s for sure. ” My grin was probably visible from space, but I was sure it wouldn't die down until I went to sleep from total exhaustion after we finally celebrated today with the team.

“ I’m sure Daniel will gladly celebrate with you like it’s also his podium. He may even offer a space for the trophy at home. ” Her words coming from anyone else would have made me raise my brows, but I could easily detect when she was joking by now.

“ He may but everyone can be sure that the trophy isn’t leaving my hands in the near future. I may even take it on the last race with me in the cockpit. ” I shrugged my shoulders a little, my eyes focusing back on her as she voiced her following question.

Media duties were never and will never be my favourite, but today was bearable and an occasion that I would gladly repeat in a few days time. It let me wind down a little before taking at least a million photos with the team and then changing back into my normal clothing. All the celebrations continued over dinner with music and drinks as well as our usual meals. We all knew the end of the day would bring another race week, but nothing could have held us back from enjoying ourselves this one time. It may have made us a bit more cautious but no one really rejected any drinks that were offered.

In the end the party was shut down a lot earlier than usual, which in the end prompted me to steal a bottle of champagne from the main table and two glasses as well. With those in my hand I left the team behind in search of the one person who didn’t celebrate with us, although I would have liked him there. Carefully, making sure I won’t drop any part of the ‘package’, I knocked on his door as soon as I stepped in front of it. It took him quite some time to open the lock and finally pull the door open. However, as soon as I was met with his sleepy eyes and tousled curls, I knew he must have already gone to bed.

“ I have champagne? ” I offered with a smile, although it would have been fair if Lando sent me away. I was still hopeful and let out a relieved sigh when he stepped away to give me space to enter.

“ That bottle saved you from my wrath. ” He shook his head as he closed and also locked the door behind me. “ So I’m guessing the celebration went well? How does it feel to be on a podium, ” Lando walked back to the bed with me following right behind, until we sat down on his bed.

“ It’s fine. ” I shrugged a little, delighted at the face he made at me as a reaction, before bumping my shoulder into his. “ I’m kidding. It’s unbelievable still, even though I went through the whole process of a podium ceremony. ” I shook my head a little, getting ready to open up the champagne at the same time as kicking down my shoes.

“ The first one always feels strange. But it was deserved. You guys nailed that one stop strategy. ” We clinked our glasses together before taking one sip from it. “ Wouldn’t say it all looked relaxed, comfortable and fun, but in the end it worked out. That’s what matters at the end of the day anyways. ” Lando added, leaning back on the headboard with the sleepy look nowhere to be seen.

“ I was lucky. You don’t have to dance around it. I know I was mostly lucky and just at the right place at the right time. ” My eyes were stuck down on my glass, but the smile never melted off my face though. “ But I’m gonna still enjoy it nevertheless. Tonight is my night, well deserved or not. ” I added while moving up the bed and leaning back right next to him.

“ Hey. ” Lando got my attention, my eyes moving up to his face. “ You deserved it, do not make me repeat myself ever again. ” He shook his head and even though a part of me believed him, I knew this would be a fight in my head that I had to get over by myself. “ If you’re not in the right place at the right time, you wouldn’t have gotten lucky. And one portion of luck doesn’t mean it’s long term. You fought well to keep everyone behind and got the placing you deserved. ” His hand on mine was a welcome weight, in a way grounding my running thoughts and also the adrenaline that was still zooming around my body.

“ How do we always end up on your bed? ” My mind immediately went to lighten the mood, a chuckle accompanying my words before I quickly downed the amount of champagne that was still in my glass.

“ How much did you guys already have before you came here? ” Lando asked, looking up at me when I moved to fill up my glass again. We may have had a few drinks, but I didn’t really feel it’s effect yet.

“ Not much. Don’t fret, I can take a bit more champagne. ” I rolled my eyes a little, putting down the bottle while Lando held the glasses, securing them from falling off the duvet. “ There’s no break to detox before Abu Dhabi, so they got everyone to bed early. ” I let out a sigh, turning back from the bedside table afterwards and taking one out of his hand.

“ And why aren’t you in bed early then? ” He asked back, letting his glass touch mine for a second again. He was waiting for me to answer, but I rather took a sip from the drink before getting onto answering him.

“ I am in bed if you think about it. ” I leaned back again, being the one this time who reached out for his hand and even squeezed back gently. He seemed fairly alert and awake, but you could easily tell he was deep in sleepyland when I knocked on his door.

“ If we look at it like that… Although I’m sure they meant sleeping, and not drinking with your friend. ” Lando shook his head a little, but didn’t stay away from the champagne too much longer either.

“ We will be, just not right now. Although I can leave if I’m not interesting enough. ” I offered, sitting up straighter and pointing towards the door. Truly getting up and leaving was never in my plans, but he didn’t have to know that. “ And not here probably. I have to get back to my room first. ” My nose scrunched up at the idea of having to walk after more alcohol in search of my own room.

“ You don’t have to. There’s enough space here anyways. Who wants to walk after getting tipsy, anyways? ” Lando surprised me with his words, but he only spoke the truth. “ Congrats again. Onto the last race. ” He raised his glass before we took the next sip in sync, the both of us letting out a laugh afterwards. As I was already too lazy to walk more than absolutely necessary when I arrived at his room, in the end his offer seemed comfortable enough to make me stay and fall asleep about an hour and a shower later.

Waking up was fun, right until the headache that last night caused kicked in fully. My only hope was that it was immediately after a race, which meant we would get to relax a bit more than usual. Double headers were already a strain on the body but knowing how I will feel after waking up probably wouldn’t have held me back from celebrating anyways. It wasn’t everyday that you get onto a podium as a rookie, and you can’t just pass on that chance when you’re lucky enough to get it. Taking my phone from the nightstand my eyes were luckily met with a text from Marks, informing me that today is mostly off and I’m only needed for one quick session in the evening before flying to Abu Dhabi. With a sigh I got out of the bed, Lando staying fully asleep, and left the bedroom in order not to wake him up by moving around.

As much as I wanted to wait for him to wake up on his own accord, I knew the team would need me for PR duties and some other interviews. Knowing well what Lando liked and usually ordered for breakfast that fit a driver’s race week diet, I ordered him some breakfast and then took the two glasses and the champagne bottle as I was leaving the room. I knew we would meet up around lunch time, so I wasn’t worried that we wouldn’t get to speak if I leave him there for the day. It was rare that different teams shared a hotel, but luckily I didn’t have to make a run for my own building at dawn and could just walk down the hallway to my own room. Or at least that was the plan, which got cut in half for a second when the first person I saw after leaving Lando’s room was Dan and Aurélie. I should have known our team would be moving around as everyone had meetings and to-do lists to complete before leaving for the next weekend.

“ Good morning! ” They got me out of my staring phase with a synchronized greeting, my cheeks immediately feeling ten times hotter than usual. “ So that’s where the last bottle disappeared to. ” Dan exclaimed right before a laugh breaking free from his insides and I followed his gaze with my eyes, landing them on the bottle in my hands.

“ I… Yeah. Thought no one would be missing one bottle. We had quite a few still when I left. ” I looked back up at Daniel, and even though I was worried he was actually mad at me in a way, I was only met with his usual smile as Aurélie was trying to hold back her laughter. “ What? ” I asked immediately, confused about what part of my sentence they could deem funny.

“ I hope it got the mood up for you guys. ” Dan grinned at me but was already inside the elevator, knowing his words would make me want to hit him. He wasn’t far off as I considered throwing the mentioned bottle at him, but in the end thought it would make too big of a mess. It wasn’t worth it sadly. “ If you guys would like to fly to Abu Dhabi with Max and I, let me know. We have two more seats. ” He added, stunning me at first, but it didn’t sound like such a bad idea in the end.

“ You know what? It did. And I will ask him, thank you. ” I lifted it for a second before sharing a laugh with Aurélie and leaving them to finally get to my room. As much as I could feel the blush creeping up on my neck and cheeks, I wanted to enjoy a great joke and if someone, Dan for sure didn’t mean to hurt anyone with his words.

Getting through the day was a struggle with my headache, but I knew it was just that part of the day before I would get to rest a little. The break between the last interview and my late training session consisted of a quick lunch and a long nap in my hotel room. I didn't really get to meet up with Lando before it was already time for me to leave for the hotel gym. Arriving into the lobby I was about to just straight away go to the room that Mark reserved for us, when I spotted Lando chatting away to some fans with Charlotte by his side. He looked just a tiny bit tired, but was far better off then how I still felt from yesterday. The difference between someone partying and someone just drinking a glass or two. Although it still wouldn't have made me change my mind. After a quick glance at my watch, making sure I wasn't late and had a bit of time, I was already turned towards him and got close enough that I got his attention but wasn't rushing them or the fans in any way. It was their lucky day, I wasn't about to ruin it when I could talk to Lando whenever I felt like it.

I waited until Lando signed their caps and took a few pics with them, a smile getting on my face as well, remembering how it felt to meet F1 drivers while you were only a fan and also while fighting towards a seat. Never with Lando, as he was a part of my life before it could turn into a colleague like relationship, but with almost any other driver from the grid who was already racing while we were just karting or fighting through the junior series. He was already saying bye to them and turning towards me when they seemed to spot me as well and asked for pictures. I snapped out from going down memory lane, my head feeling dizzy for a second as I went from a long time F1 fan to the F1 driver I was now, realising that their question shouldn’t have sounded as strange as it felt for me. The second I realised they were waiting for an answer I nodded and stepped closer, letting them decide how they wanted the picture but I wasn’t surprised when they requested Lando to be in one or two as well.

“ Hi! ” He turned towards me, with his usual grin on show, as soon as the girls were content and walking away from us. “ How’s your head? ” He inquired while Charlotte was still on her phone, meaning we had a bit of time before any of us would have to go.

“ Achie, but I deserve it. Hopefully it will get better before we get to Abu Dhabi. ” I let out a sigh, shaking my head carefully not to make everything worse. “ I wanted to find you during lunch, but ended up napping the time away. Dan offered to take both of us on Max’s jet to Abu Dhabi, if you’re up for it. ” I finally got to the subject that I was looking for him in the first place for. The other is just generally talking with him for a bit.

“ If they’re sure about it I would love to. It will be fun, that’s not even up for debate. ” He accepted my offer without any second thoughts or actually barely any thinking about it. I shouldn’t have been surprised, knowing he was quite good friends with Max and Daniel as well. “ Sure you can take them one on one for a few hours? ” His chuckle made one of my eyebrows raise up in question. “ Never mind, it will be fun. ” Lando clapped me on the shoulder, turning towards Charlotte when she called out his name.

“ Go, before she gets angry. None of us wants to experience that again. ” I shook my head while wincing at the memory, before trying to shake it out of my head. As funny as it was, you never wanted her anger to be aimed towards you.

I gladly moved into the hug Lando initiated as we said goodbye and turned towards our own destination. The second I lifted my eyes from my watch I could spot Mark at the entrance to the hallway, leading from the lobby towards the gym and swimming pool, meaning I was already quite late. The numbers on my watch only assured me of the suspected situation, making me quicken my steps towards my trainer. Luckily he seemed to be on the happier side of life that day, and didn’t try to jokingly punish me or push me to my limits too much for my rare mistake either. For once I could thank the ‘recovery day gods’ for saving me from his anger. Thanks to them I could actually get back to my room without a limp in my step and actually managed to get into the shower without fighting my lazy and tired side.

After a quick shower I got on the phone with Dan to accept his offer about the flight to our next race destination, getting all the info about the journey down on paper. Knowing that Lando would be in the middle of some kind of a team meeting, I only texted him the infos and started packing all my remaining stuff. Living out of a suitcase most of the time had its perks, one being the tiny amount of packing one had to do while travelling from one place to another. Let’s not mention the cons of it though. Just as I sat back down on my bed to bug Lando about not answering me, a message from him arrived on my device making me smile. He also pretty much decided on his own that we would be having dinner together before taking a car to the airport, and didn’t give me a chance to decline in any way. Not that I would have, anyways.

He seemed adamant about getting everything sorted, from getting us a taxi to getting us a table somewhere, that he also kept a secret right until we got there. Luckily it wasn’t anything fancy, my basic choice of clothing fitting the diner, but a place that I mentioned to him during our off days prior to the weekend. I was both surprised and touched that he remembered and went out of his way to make it all happen before we would leave. The atmosphere and the food was out of this world, and even though it probably didn’t fully fit our dietary plan, it would have stayed between us anyways. At least I wouldn’t go and tell on him if he kept it to himself as well. What Mark and Jon didn’t know about wouldn’t hurt them. Or us. Depends on the perspective, really.

After our meal we got another taxi to the airport, where we easily walked through all the checks and were escorted to a lounge for the private jet. I was quite surprised to see Max and Daniel nowhere, but thought they were just either running a bit late or were already on the plane while they ran through our papers once more. I didn’t really understand why Lando looked quite nervous, given we weren’t about to travel with strangers or with a big crowd, but with friends he should have known well and it was his own decision to travel with them. By the time we had to board the plane, and our travel buddies were still missing I was starting to suspect some funny business going on in the background. Lando’s anxious leg shaking throughout our whole waiting time didn’t help my thoughts in any way either.

“ What’s going on, Lando? ” I couldn’t wait any longer to ask then when we were walking up the steps to the plane. He didn’t turn back towards me but never gave me an answer. At least not in the form of words.

My brows were furrowed already, but the lines on my forehead got even deeper as he let me go through the door first, making me the first one to get onto the plane. I was close to getting scared about going first, thinking that they might be planning some kind of a prank on me, but the voices I could hear erased any and every thought from my head. I didn’t even care about my luggage anymore, leaving my suitcase in the way of the entrance and took a few huge steps to finally see for myself if I was just imagining the voices or it was my actual reality. A huge part of me was sure I was actually going insane, but my eyes confirmed the picture created in my head as I could see my whole family on board, not paying any attention to us boarding. It was only my scream that got their heads turned towards the entrance, with less surprise on their faces than I had of course.

I probably could have broken some kind of world record with the speed I had for the few steps I had to take to get to my mum at first, and then everyone else. I could hardly let anyone get out of my squeeze to get to another person, slowly getting through the line that formed as everyone stood up. I couldn’t believe my eyes to see both my parents and all my siblings in front of me and not just through a screen. It took me a good ten minutes to calm down finally, just in time for all of us to sit down as the plane was set to finally leave the airport and take us to Abu Dhabi. I took a seat right next to Lando and across from my parents who looked exactly as ecstatic as probably I did from the outside, but at least felt inside.

“ You’re staying for the whole week? ” My excitement was slowly calming down as everything sank down in my head and it wasn’t such an alien thought after missing them for so long. Mum’s nod made me grin once again before I couldn’t hold back any longer and finally brought up the last race, to tell them everything face to face finally.

Props to them, they all listened to my rambling, even seeming excited about my story, even though they followed the race on TV and already listened to my presentation through a phone. I was even a bit disappointed that I didn’t have the trophy with myself, as it seemed safer to make it travel with the team, but I also knew we would have the time to show them after landing. We didn’t have to get everything ticked off the list in one hour, when we had a whole week and even the weekend for it anyways. I knew I was running on new found adrenaline the second everyone seemed tired other than me, dozing off in their seats while I was still scrolling through my social media, showing Lando a pic once in a while as he was still awake next to me. By the time I decided to put down my phone, only Lando was awake, but getting ready to sleep as he got back to his seat with a blanket.

“ Wanna share half of it? ” He asked just as I was about to ask for exactly what he offered, and I could only nod as an answer. Without another word he got our footrests up and the blanket draped over the both of us, luckily big enough that we could fit under it both.

I had a debate in my head with myself just for a second, before I pushed up the hand rest that was between our seats, leaning my head on his shoulder. He didn’t even seem surprised and that’s why I got a bit scared when he pulled away abruptly, straightening myself up immediately. I got even more confused when he took his discarded hoodie from the little table we had. My cheeks stayed their normal colour only because they didn’t have time to produce enough blush. However the second he placed the folded up hoodie on his shoulder, leaning back fully in his seat, it seemed like only a few milliseconds were enough for that missing blush to arrive. I was glad he was way too deep in his phone to have a chance to look up and make fun of my new colour. Trying my best I just put back my head in it’s previous spot, hiding my cheek into the soft material as much as I could, catching a whiff of his usual cologne coming off of it in the process. It made me sigh out which prompted Lando to turn his head a little and look at me out of the corner of his eye. As an answer I just gently shook my head, closing my eyes again and focusing on getting some sleep as soon as possible.

When I woke up my head needed a minute or two to realise where I actually was while it was still laying on Lando’s shoulder. My leg also must have moved over his, his hand holding it in place, while we were asleep making me halfway draped over him. Feeling the weight of his head and his curls a bit on my forehead held me back from moving too much around as we still had a few minutes before landing and waking him up wasn’t really a priority. Opening my eyes again they landed right on my mum who had a meaningful smile on her face that made me blush as soon as I completely wrapped my head around the situation. I mostly just closed my eyes again until it was really time for us to wake up, when luckily it was Lando who first started moving around meaning I didn’t have to be the mean one, poking him awake. He seemed pretty out of it at first but got himself together by the time the plane finally landed and we were allowed to get off with all our baggage.

The thought of having my family out at a GP again still felt strange as we took a car ride to the hotel where we had our reserved rooms. Lando’s team was at a different one but he still kept us company for the ride and got most of my family’s bags out of the trunk with the help of my dad before taking the same taxi to his own team’s hotel. As it was already late and everyone was tired anyways we all decided to just get our rooms, have a quick dinner and then call it a night. Before going to bed I still made sure to send a thank you message to Lando, but I only saw his reaction to it in the morning as I fell asleep the second my whole body touched the duvet.

I was glad that I never held back from sending that message as in the remainder of the week we never really had time to meet up and talk more than a few words. The first time I got to really talk to him was during an interview that included both of us after the first two free practice sessions, getting to discuss the whole season and the feelings we were bringing into the last race. It all felt like a simple conversation with jokes flying all over the place as well as of course the usual teasing that us being in the same area almost always brought out of people. It was still a lovely start to the weekend and got our spirits up even if the schedule was packed and we didn’t get much socialising after this occasion. As much as this was the last race it still held the same importance and we couldn’t just forget about it. It was still an important occasion for a chance at points that the team needed.

Somehow it turned out to be pretty underwhelming after everything, although that was actually good news in a way. We were happy for the couple of points we managed to get, but it wasn’t the same kind of content feeling afterwards. The only thing that made it special was having my whole family there, watching the race from the stands and also getting to support me right from the garage through the sessions. All of them would have never fit in that small space, but they managed to decide who and when would sit in the garage rather than their seats in the grandstand. There was a smile that never left my face, not even when we had to separate for the nights as they had their rooms a bit further away from me. I usually went to bed with it, and woke up with it still being there, only disappearing while I was in the car and had to focus.

It took a bit of time for both Dan and I to tick all the interviews off the to-do list which meant we could finally film our last team video together. It turned out to be a bit emotional, the thought of separating from him, in the team mates sense of the word, becoming actual reality just as we neared the end of the day. The end of the video felt like it was a real closing point of the season and the start of something new and uncertain but also very exciting. Even though we were free to leave the spot with the camera crew gone, none of us really made a move to stand up and leave the spot where we were sitting at the pitwall right across our garages. It was strange to see the packing get to the point where they started to take off the boards with our names and pictures, from above our own garage openings.

“ Hey. It might be Lando jumping on my nerves and challenging my calmness next year, but that doesn’t mean you can’t come to me. Understood? ” I felt him bumping our shoulders together just as I turned towards him, peeling my eyes off of the packing crew. “ I’m still here, just a few garages away. Even for questions that sound stupid, yeah? ” He asked again, not letting go of my eyes as I nodded.

“ Thank you. I can’t say I won’t need it. ” I let out a chuckle, knowing there will be moments when I will be unsure about the right answer. “ You know... I don’t think I could have asked for a better partner in crime for my first ever season. ” My voice might have sounded a bit shaky during the last few words, but reading his face as much as I could he wouldn’t have been much better off. The hand clapping my back instead of words coming as a reaction also told me that I must have been right.

“ It has been a pleasure. ” He forced his words out in the end, making us both laugh by how formal our conversation sounded. However we both knew, as much as we joked around and with laughter being a main part of the last year, all these words were real and we both meant what came out of our mouths.

It was only when he had to leave that we finally got off of our butts, him leaving towards the car park while I went to get my things together from the garage. I opted for a last walk down the pit lane after retrieving my backpack, watching as I passed every garage, all the teams packing up already. I didn’t miss Lando still standing around, with his team and his phone in hand, and I was about to just wave at him as a goodbye when he called after me. I turned back to see him pass the phone to the two guys next to him while he quickly caught up to me actually running.

“ Hey! Are you coming to the after party? ” He asked without any hesitation, getting to the point immediately. “ I’m sure Dan mentioned it and I hope you didn’t think we would let you pass on it. ” He added with a grin and his arm came up around my shoulder as we continued on my previous route to the parking lot.

“ I knew you guys won’t let me just go back and sleep as normal people would like to do. ” I had to roll my eyes, my smile staying put though as I knew from the moment Daniel brought the party up that I wouldn't get to miss it. “ Yes, I’m going. I already have my outfit waiting for me in my room. ” I let out a sigh when he was still waiting for a real answer from me, even though I thought my words said enough already.

“ Fantastic. Just what I wanted to hear. ” He pulled me closer, almost making the both of us stumble and fall to the ground but luckily somehow we caught ourselves just in time. “ How about I take a taxi to your hotel half an hour earlier than the party and we go together from there? ” He stopped when we got to the end of the pitlane where I would take the exit.

“ I would like that. But don’t be late. Might take myself there alone otherwise. ” I tried to threaten him a bit, even though I knew it probably would never work. He knew me better than to believe such empty words coming from me.

His answer was enough for me though, both saying our goodbyes before I turned towards the exit and he walked back to his team to continue whatever they were doing on his phone. It was only back at the hotel when I realised they were probably already streaming when I met him, as he was still live on Twitch with both of the guys standing around him as well. Deciding it could be my entertainment while getting ready I positioned the phone somewhere safe while I took a shower and got dressed again. I was surprised when he was still going as I was already pretty much done with everything but my hair.

‘ Shouldn’t you be on your way? You might be late already… ’ I took my phone into my hands to send him a message privately and with a bit of a delay could actually hear his phone go off with the notification.

It was already worth it to send it when I could see his face change as he checked his watch for the time and then rushed to the end of the stream. He was of course still on time and would arrive just as I finished up with everything. It was still fun to play with him and make him a bit worried to see his face change in record time. While my screen went dark with his stream turning off I got started on my hair. It didn’t take longer than usual and just as I packed everything away there was a knock on my door. As a last step I pulled on my sandals before taking my little bag from the bed and walked up to the door to open it, revealing Lando in a baby blue shirt and white pants.

“ I’m surprised but also not really, how you’re exactly on time. ” I laughed as his face finally relaxed a little from the tense look he had on just as I stepped outside. “ The fans seemed surprised and sad how quickly you had to leave. ” I let out a sigh, trying to put on a sad face to accompany my words.

“ They would probably let me off the hook if they knew I had a party to attend with someone like you. ” His compliment wasn’t anticipated in any way from my side, making even my hands freeze for a second as I was putting away my keycard. When I looked up at him he already had his signature smirk on, knowing full well he managed to catch me off guard with how his tone told me he meant everything.

We got into the elevator still silently, the both of us leaning back onto the wall, but I couldn’t hold back from looking at him for longer than three floors. I was ready for more teasing words or a cocky grin but his only reaction was reaching out his hand towards me just as we reached the ground floor. With a sigh and a shake to my head I took his hand, letting him lead us out of the building and to a car that took us to the part of the local beach where the party was planned. We could hear the music from a corner away and easily spotted the pack from the entrance as we were granted entry at the sight of our passes.

Turned out we were just on time to get a glass of champagne and listen to the quick season summary before the real partying started. With a last storm of applause and everyone clinking their glasses together the season was deemed close and the music got turned back on, our ears getting saved only by the fact that we were outside and not in a closed-in club. Even if I would have tried to get away after the first few minutes of dancing, Lando and Daniel made sure that I would always have someone keeping me there. I couldn’t say I wasn’t enjoying it as my laughter throughout the night would have betrayed me, but I was still relieved every time when I got to leave the dance floor to get myself a new drink.

After hours of dancing, drinking, conversing and just simply having fun, my feet were happy when Lando offered for us to sit down somewhere. I was a tad bit confused when he seemed to have clocked onto a sitting hammock at the side of the party venue, but I never really stopped him on our way there. I watched intently as he sat down, still holding my hand in his, that he seconds later used to pull me down as well. At the start of the night I might have tried to squeeze in beside him, but right then and there my only thought was to not get his slacks sandy as I sat down on his lap sideways. The back of the hammock almost fully shielded us from the partying herd enough that I could let myself relax into his arm that came around my middle, in order to hold me back from falling off the hammock. We had a great view on the open water with all the music and noise behind us, a bit more muffled than it has been while we were in the center of the crowd. Thanks to probably the alcohol in my bloodstream and also to how tired I was Lando’s whispered “ I’m really glad you’re here too. ” almost went unnoticed even though he said it right next to my ear.

“ Here as in right now with you? Or just in general? ” I wondered when my brain finally processed his words and I realised he wasn’t just thinking out loud. I lifted my gaze onto him from the surface of the water, even though his sudden close proximity made me freeze for a beat.

“ Both. Just you existing and also being part of this whole circus. ” Lando shrugged, his arm tightening around me while he took a sip of his cocktail. I had my drink as well still, but felt like this conversation should be had before I would down even more of it. “ The only part I always like about this hectic place. Even if we had a few bumps on the road until now. ” He was rather looking at the view than me, but in a way I was glad for it, as I got to examine his face without him really noticing.

“ Quite the potholes if you ask me… ” I tore my eyes away from his irises to carefully move around a bit and sit in a way that I could rest my head on his shoulder. “ Surprised we managed to get through it. We’re both a bit too hot headed for things like this. As much as they think you’re a shy little kid, you have your moments. ” I poked his side ‘accidentally’ with my elbow and could immediately feel the shaking of his body as he both tried to pull away from my attack and tried to hold back his laughter.

“ You’re one to talk. We’re both just as bad as the other. ” He shrugged a little, his fingers digging into my side as he tried to make me squirm, and sadly succeeded with his siege. “ You’re the one with a dragon on her helmet. It fits you well. ” He added, making me roll my eyes, but it wasn’t enough to make me wanna leave. After the whole season nothing would get me to actually leave his side. At least not things that could actually happen.

“ Exactly why I have it on there. Scares people away before they try to get close to me. ” My head fell back onto his shoulder, my forehead resting on his neck and my eyes fluttering close. “ I just need to come up with something new design wise for next year. With the new colours. ” I let out a sigh, already daydreaming about the new season, even though usually it stressed me out. His proximity had a great effect on numbing my brain and making me relax. “ You should design one for me. Yours always looks pretty neat. ” I looked up at him, immediately feeling as excitement slowly woke up my brain.

“ I’m not against the idea. But you can’t say no if it’s not perfect. ” He raised his finger in front of my face, threatening me in the funniest way possible. I accepted his conditions with a nod, letting my head fall back in it’s previous spot, staying put even when he flicked my nose. His body shook with his laughter but it wasn’t in any way uncomfortable.

The songs in the background came one after the other, the party seeming endless with all the noise and shouting. In that moment I felt free in every sense of the word. We finally closed a season, giving us some time off, that we could decide to spend however we wanted. It was also the first time where I didn’t try and answer every question that popped up in my head and just tried to enjoy the moment. Also the fact that no kind of media was allowed to the party let me really just go with the flow without worrying what will get onto the world wide web for every fan to see. The drivers still could post content about our night, but we both knew they were our friends who would look out for us and make sure to not post anything that we wouldn’t approve of.

That free feeling was the only thing that gave me enough confidence to move my head off his shoulder, accidentally bumping into his chin as he made the same movement. I couldn't help a quiet chuckle right until his arm moved up from around my waist to around my neck. His eyes were everywhere, in the end focusing in on mine finally, a smile getting onto both of our faces. I could feel his fingers going through my hair absentmindedly, as it was pushed onto my shoulder where his arm was resting. His other hand was still on my thigh, resting right under where my dress ended, his fingers drumming on my skin to the rhythm of the songs in the background. It was all a welcome feeling and sensation going up to my scalp and running through my whole body. His gaze only intensified its effects even though his eyes were even softer than usual. It was the first time I didn't try to understand what's going through his head, although I was pretty sure we had almost the same thoughts and ideas going through our brains.

I would never be able to tell who moved first, but it wasn't important anyways. The only thing I could focus on was how his lips met mine in a quick and chaste kiss. His arm stayed around my neck, holding me closer softly, giving me the chance to pull away any time. Not that I needed that chance. My eyes opened again the second we separated, his doing the same and meeting mine immediately. I could almost feel his smile on my own skin from our proximity and couldn't hold back from the need to experience it as I leaned forward for another kiss. We soon separated again for air, prompting me to move around a little, turning more towards him in order to hide my face in his shoulder. As much as I moved in for the second one, my thoughts caught up to me finally, making me blush immediately. I could feel as he took the glass that was still in my hand, putting it aside before he fully hugged me closer to himself. The moment my hand was free it shot up to the nape of his neck, holding on, even though I already felt secure from falling by his arms. I couldn't help but let my fingers go through the short hairs there, while a shiver ran through my body at first by his breath on my neck and then by the little kiss he left right behind my ear, brushing my hair away from the spot to give himself space.

" Don't you dare close me out now. " Lando spoke up, right next to my ear, leaving another kiss there before leaning back a little. I followed his movement with my body, hiding my face back into his neck but bumping my nose into his jaw intentionally in the process. "You can put on a dress like this but then be shy about a kiss? " I could both feel and hear his chuckle shaking his whole body while his hand slid onto my back to emphasize his words, about my backless dress.

" They're two very different things. " I mumbled into his skin, amazed at how he seemed to understand what I said. " You can't compare them... " I moved my head a little, looking down at his hand that had the bracelet on which I gave him not long ago. It always made me feel warm inside, knowing he actually liked it enough to wear it every day. " But I won't, it just surprised me in a way. " I shrugged a little, moving back again and letting my hand slide down to his stomach. I didn't dare to look up at him yet but was perfectly fine and content letting him take my hand in his and hold it there.

“ I’m glad the season ended when and how it did. I wouldn’t exchange it for anything, not even winning the championship. ” His words made me look up immediately and when I realised he wasn’t joking I had to fight my own emotions. In the end, just a second later, my disbelief won over getting wooed by his compliment and I swatted at his chest full force.

“ Yes you would and should. I would be actually angry if you didn’t exchange it for the championship. ” I shook my head at him, totally forgetting about how looking into his eyes would make me feel after everything. I slumped back into my previous spot, but at the same time couldn’t look away. It was visible even in his eyes as his grin got wider and I was more than mesmerized by the front row view I got of it.

“ Hi. ” He bit out just in time, before my elbow met his ribcage and he let out a huff of air, surrendering to my attack. “ Feisty. Has anyone told you that before? ” His hands tried shielding his sides from another round of attack that his words could have brought onto himself.

I was just about to roll my eyes at him when I could see movement in the corner of my eyes, and turning my head I was met with Daniel standing not far away from us. “ Lovebirds, wanna be part of the group pic? ” He called out to us, not giving me any time to feel embarrassed by our position. He didn’t seem one bit surprised and was already turning away when Lando answered his question.

I was the first one to get to my feet, taking my sandals and the remainder of my drink into hand, knowing I would probably lose them otherwise. I watched as Lando did the same with his shoes and glass, my eyes sticking to the part of his shirt where a few too many buttons were opened as he straightened up. In my dazed state I gladly took his hand when it was offered to me, letting him pull me towards the group gently. We both left our shoes at our official table before joining everyone else at the front of the bunch thanks to both of our heights. I didn’t pull away when Lando’s arm came around the front of my shoulder, in that moment giving up any care of the world around us. I just wanted to enjoy the bit of time we still had before the break started.

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randomfandomimagine · 4 years ago

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I’m Back With Some Changes

I'm back! Hello again, everyone! 👋 I’ve been away for a while, but I have returned as Trish The White! 😂 This was a needed break in which I didn't only rest, but also made some decisions, and things will be a little different from now on.

I haven't been enjoying this blog at all lately, it has become such a source of stress. So I have a new mindset and I will do everything I can to avoid getting overwhelmed, even if I have to be a little selfish. I just don't want to force myself to write anymore and keep getting stressed and overall feeling like the blog is an obligation. I want to have fun again! In order to feel comfortable running this blog still, I need to feel like I am doing things at my own pace and under my own conditions.

CHANGES COMING TO THE BLOG:

Concerning requests: I'll either be closing requests sooner, accepting less of them, being more selective or just opening fewer types. I also changed the spamming rule from 3 requests per person to 2, and I might change it again. I just get too overwhelmed with so many requests.

Concerning my rules: One of the biggest issues I've been dealing with is people breaking my rules and requesting when things are closed, which stressed me out so much. Basically, if you you don't give me all the information I need in order to write your request and don't respect my rules and boundaries, I will delete your request. If you're new to requesting or anxious about it, don't worry, you can DM me or send me asks with your doubts and I'll be I'm more than happy to answer all your questions before you send your request.

Concerning my fandom list: I have taken some fandoms off my list that I wasn’t interested in anymore, didn’t get requests for or felt too out of touch with, which are Baby Driver, Broken Sword, Jurassic World, Misfits, Resident Evil, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and The Outsiders. Don’t worry, though, I might return to them at some point if I revisit them.

Lastly, concerning the queue: In order to disconnect a little from so much writing, I will be taking at least one day off every week to do tag games or ask games and just not write or post fanfiction. It's not normal to have no free time because the only thing I do is write fanfic. I’ll also post more personal posts and start taking breaks whenever I need them and stop feeling guilty about it, and do so before I’m badly burntout. I know the right people won’t mind that I rest for a few days.

That’s pretty much it, I think those simple changes will really help me. I hope you're all okay with these and that you understand, let me know what you think! Also, remember that if you want to encourage and support me, you can always interact with my work (replies, reblogs, asks... anything else other than the usual likes) if you're enjoying them, that always gives me lots of motivation and makes my efforts and hard work feel worth it. Thank you so much for keeping up with me and for reading 😘💜

#I'm feeling so much better #full of energies and excitement again #and its comforting to take it easier now with these changes #message #update #changes on the blog #important

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zhangboheng-moved · 4 years ago

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i was tagged by jay @sebastianvettelsgender (ty 💕💕) to answer questions about my blog so >:3c

1. why did you choose your url?

because all-around world champion zhang boheng is the light of my life my precious angel my lil meow meow my reason for living my babygirl my everything <3 and i wanted to let the world know that 😤 (on a more serious note his gymnastics is genuinely captivating and i am obsessed with his work and want him to stick around for a long time bc he is So Beautiful)

2. any side blogs?

yes but they’re unfortunately both kinda dead 😭 maybe one day i’ll revive them or just merge them into this blog but for now they’re just sitting there gathering dust

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

since i was maybe 11 . . . ? so about 9 years !!

4. do you have a queue tag?

i actually don’t 😵‍💫 i just sort of spam rb either from my dash or from my likes whenever i have the time

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

THIS blog i started after i got locked out of my old one + i did it mostly for gym bc the olympics was happening and i decided this was the year i was gonna try and interact w online gymfans . . . my first ever blog i think i started for pkmn? i’ve had several for several fandoms though lol i had one dedicated almost solely to drag race for a while

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

see my answer to question 1 but ALSO: just . . . look at him. he’s the world’s cutest boy. the rainbow in his hair solved all my problems in life <3

7. why did you choose your header?

bc the worlds 2017 pbars podium is one of my favs they were all so cute . . . oleg getting them all to hold their medals up to their eyes was so sweet . . . and yuanyuan won gold in his debut worlds <3 also they’re just 3 of my favs in general <3

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

i actually don’t know omg?? probably something i said abt lewis hamilton that people agreed with idk 😵‍💫

9. how many mutuals do you have?

i actually don’t know !! i never keep track but i love all of you <3

10. how many followers do you have?

i . . . also don’t know lmao i don’t really look at the numbers 😭

11. how many people do you follow?

idk the specifics but 100% not enough. it’s like . . . double digits. if anyone has blog suggestions to follow (or themselves idm) pls hmu i need my dash spicing up again

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

oh probably loads skdhdks

13. how often do you use tumblr?

every day lol it’s kinda bad. multiple times a day since i have the app so checking it is like. dangerously easy

14. did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog?

nope !! i’m here for a good time and i don’t rly want to start any fights . . . tho i will lovingly bully my friends <3

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

i don’t really like them tbh,, they tend to feel performative and are usually vvv america-centric 😵‍💫

16. do you like tag games?

i love them omg!!

17. do you like ask games?

i do 🥰

18. which of your moots do you think is tumblr famous?

@lewishamlton for the gorgeous edits . . . @saintlysebchal too should be for the same reason. AND @sebastianvettelsgender ur 100% should be famous bc ur gifs are lovely and u single-handedly converted me into a valtteri fan and that means u should have influence over f1blr. also in my head @soviethorror is some sort of celeb just in general. u give off that vibe rat <3 also @woofwoofdaniel

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

no but i am accepting applications

no pressure tags: @soviethorror @urara-ashikawa @fushigidane @saintlysebchal @woofwoofdaniel and anyone else who wants to just say i tagged u bc i did in my heart <3

#tag game

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seokiloquy · 4 years ago

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Word Gets Around - Inarizaki

AU: Gang / Organized Crime

Requested (Hopefully you’ll like it, dear requester)

Tags/Warning: GN! Reader, a little cliche...I’m running out of ideas for gang aus sjdfk, not much plot...just random times with some of the inarizaki boys, I hope you get a kick from it though (it’s a bit different than how I usually write...at least in my opinion)

Word Count: 5.2k +

The most unexpected thing to happen to you was something that you should have expected, which was kind of sad, to be honest.

You tended to stay away from your family’s business: running one of the most powerful gangs in Miyagi prefecture, Shiratorizawa. You made that decision very early on in your life, knowing where the money for your food, house, and clothes came from made you want to vomit.

Your father hadn’t liked your decision but didn’t actively protest it either. However, whenever he tried to talk you into it, you would walk away and then hear him mumble, “They’ll change their mind eventually.”

You always resisted the urge to say, “I doubt it.” But even you wouldn’t provoke him like that. Not directly at least.

Since the pressure to take over the business had started at a young age, younger you thought the only way to combat your predestined fate was to be inherently bad at all of the skills that your father had deemed “worthy”.

He would give you a gun and you would accidentally shoot him in the foot. If he gave you reports and paperwork, you would spill your coffee or tea on them or accidentally place them in the shredder. If he gave you a group of people to manage a job—which you knew would be illegal—you would give them the day off or not show up at all.

Your father would lecture you and yell at you, but you learned to find joy from the look on his face when it turned blue and red from all the yelling. He tried to con you into it further, only bringing you into meetings and making you sit in his office for hours on end to convince you otherwise. It didn’t work. Hearing your father’s plans and account numbers was the most boring and dull thing on the planet.

You were great at being terrible and your father thought that you were terrible. After a while, he stopped trying.

You would spend most of your spare time doing schoolwork or helping your mom with whatever she needed to do that day.

As you helped your mom prepare dinner for that night, one of your father’s lackeys pulled you aside. You frowned. You didn’t recognize him, which was strange because you knew almost everyone who was a part of Shiratorizawa.

“Your father requested to see you,” he said. His face was pinched into an annoyed look. You doubted that he joined Shirtorizawa to be a messenger between parent and child.

“Okay,” you said. “Do you know what it's about?”

He glanced at you for a brief moment and then looked away quickly. He shook his head and then walked away.

Well, he definitely knows something, you thought. You called back to your mom and told her where you were going.

Though you’ve lived here your entire life, your house still amazed you. It was bigger than any house on the block, the floors were white and grey marble, all of the doors were taller and wider than they need to be, and there were more pieces of art littered around than a museum. You didn’t know how they were all acquired, but something in you never asked.

You knocked once on the door to your father’s office and let yourself in.

Your father sat behind his desk like he always would, back straight and arms folded and balanced on the edge of the desk, but there was something different.

A group of people sat around him. An older-looking man sat back in the chair that was across your father’s desk. You could see the edges of his glasses poke out, but he otherwise didn’t look at you. You had, however, caught the attention of the two boys that were standing on either side of the man.

They couldn’t have been much older than you. The taller of the two had dark brown hair, parted directly down the middle with little strings at the front that stood up. He looked at you rather indifferently, giving you a glance over, narrowing his eyes slightly, and then turning back to your father as if he took a mental picture of you for him to dissect later.

The other one had a head of grey hair with black tips on the ends. He looked at you softly, but, still, after a moment turned his attention back to your father.

Dread filled your stomach. You mentally ticked off all of the things your father could have called you up here for. He wasn’t the type of person to yell at you for being a disappointment in front of an audience. Unless he decided to switch things up a bit.

“Am I interrupting? I can come back,” you said, steeling yourself. You clenched your jaw tightly.

“No,” your father said. “Take a seat, (Y/N).”

You walked through the silence and sat in the chair that was opposite to your father and beside the unknown man and boys.

You looked between the two sets of people. “No.”

Your father raised his brow. “Excuse me.”

You shrugged. “Whatever is going here, I disagree, so no to what you’re going to ask me.”

The boy with the brown hair snorted, earning him a jab in the side from the older man sitting in the chair beside you.

Your father sighed. “You don’t really have a choice.”

“I don’t?” you said, questioning the words as they left your mouth.

“You don’t,” he repeated sternly. His voice was low and rough. You recognized his tone as your queue to stop talking. You learned the hard way that if you pushed past that point, it would end badly.

You looked away. “Then why am I here?”

“I can answer that,” the man said. He adjusted his glasses and turned to you. “Your father made a deal with us and lost. So, you will be working for us until his debt is paid off.”

You blinked. “Excuse me?” You looked pointedly towards your father. “Is that true? You traded your own child? So you could what? Avoid whatever they threaten you with? You’re pathetic.”

Your father glared at you, his fists tightening into balls on his desk. “Do not speak to me that way. And you will go with them.”

“No, I won’t,” you said, “and I’m pretty sure that this is illegal.”

“All that we do is illegal, (Y/N).”

“All that you do is illegal,” you spat back.

Your father bolted up from behind his desk and walked over to your side of the table. He excused himself, curtly, to his guests, then grabbed your arm roughly and pulled you outside of his office.

He closed the door and turned to you. “Go along with it.”

“What is your problem,” you said, ignoring the pain in your arm from where his grip held on. “Even though you do shady things all of the time, I thought you’d at least draw the line at giving your kid to someone, which is definitely illegal and out of some wacky-ass fanfiction.”

“Calm down,” your father said. “This is all a part of the plan.”

The plan? You thought. He has officially lost it. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“You’re going to go with them,” he said again, “and you’re going to gather intel about them and report back. You’ll be at the heart of Inarizaki. You’ll know everything that they do, plan, and you can come back and tell me everything that they do and plan. You’ll redeem yourself and then be ready to take over.”

You scoffed. “The only thing that I will be doing is getting axe-murdered or worse.”

He ignored you. “You’ll come back after a year and it’ll be like nothing happened. They aren’t going to harm you either. It’s a part of the deal that we made, they just wanted to have someone do grunt work for them and they wanted you because you’re my child.”

Maybe you should axe murder him. When have people in his line of work ever kept promises they made? You’ve seen him make and break more promises than you could keep track of.

“What deal did you make?” You already knew you were fighting a losing battle. “What about mom? You’re insane if you think she’ll forgive you for this.”

“It’s nothing bad,” he said. Lie, you thought. “I made a bad bet—”

“And I’m paying the price.”

“You’re just going to live with them for a bit and your mother is going to think that you’re going abroad. Listen—”

You stopped listening. You couldn’t believe it. You shook in rage and hatred for the person standing in front of you. You always knew that he did awful things to a lot of people, but you never expected that you would make it onto that list.

At least if you were murdered in the middle of the night wherever these Inarizaki people were taking you, you’d be far away from him.

“Fine,” you said. “Let’s lead me to my death.”

“We aren’t going to kill you,” the man in the glasses—Kurosu, you reminded yourself, the leader of Inarizaki—said as he pulled out of your house’s driveway.

You got some time to pack up your things and got to hug and say goodbye to your mom before leaving. Your father had offered you a smile and a knowing look, but you barely cast him a second glance. It probably never occurred to him that you could spill all of Shiratorizawa’s secrets without blinking.

Yes, you did your best to stay away from all of the technical and logistics of Shirstorizawa’s operations, but that was the sole reason that your father had been flimsy and unaware of all of the stuff he said to the members of his gang while you were in the room.

You looked at the rearview mirror, catching the eyes of Kurosu. “And I totally believe you.”

The boy sitting beside you, the one with the dark hair, the one who snorted at your previous comment, laughed.

“Suna,” said Kurosu.

“Yes?” he said.

“Would you like to add something?”

Suna turned to you. “We don’t axe murder people.”

You glared at him. “And I totally believe you too.”

Suna fixed his gaze out the window again. “Kita? Much longer until we’re back home?”

The grey-haired boy shrugged. “10 minutes. Maybe 20 if there’s any more traffic.”

Kita, who was sitting in the passenger seat, turned around and looked at you. His eyes drifted to your arm and then back up to your eyes. “Do you even know what you’ll be doing?”

“Planning my funeral?”

Kurosu sighed and made a left turn. “You will be doing what you did for your father.”

Your eyebrows drew together. “What do you think I did for my father?”

“You were trained to take over Shiratorizawa were you not? Paperwork, running jobs, fieldwork. Sound familiar?”

You caught eyes with the grey hair boy again. You almost felt bad for them. Has your father really made this deal? He told you that you’d be doing grunt work, so it looks like they weren’t the only ones being lied to.

“Unless paperwork includes shredding files; running jobs means getting groceries; and fieldwork means taking the bus to school, then my father really oversold my skills.”

“What do you mean?” Kita asked.

Something rude to say sat at the tip of your tongue. You paused. It wasn’t their fault. They didn’t know that they made a deal with a lair. But how intelligent could their organization be if they wanted the child of someone else’s gang to help them? How intelligent was your father for sending you over with them?

“I never wanted any part in Shiratorizawa,” you said. “So, I refused to learn everything that came with the job. I never did any of the things you listed and never wanted any part in it.”

As Kurosu pulled up to a red light, he turned to look at you. You felt all three pairs of eyes on you. You tugged at the sleeves of your sweater and looked out the window.

“Congrats,” you said dully, “you’ve hired the most skilless person for the job.”

It wasn’t as if you were expecting a grand entrance with a red and gold carpet, but it did shock you when absolutely no one was standing at the entrance of the Inarizaki house. You could tell that the house was full of people too. There were shoes scattered along the entrance and you could hear quick footsteps and backtracks from the floor above you. At your house, there were always people patrolling and walking through the halls.

They were completely unguarded.

You made a note of that. Even though you were going to tell your father that they were heavily guarded and armed, you never knew when the information you took in would be of use. The unguarded doors meant that they were trying to keep people out, but they weren’t trying to keep you in.

“Excuse me,” Kurosu muttered. He made the first left and disappeared around it. You hoped that he was going to yell at your father. Maybe he would send you back in the process.

Suna had left quietly. You hadn’t noticed he was gone until you turned around and only saw Kita. His expression was unreadable.

So far, you had only met two of the members of Inarizaki and their leader, and you couldn’t tell if they liked you or even accepted your presence in their home.

“Do I get a room?” you asked.

He didn’t answer, only tipping his head to the side slightly.

“Or am I sleeping in a barn or something?”

You took a step further into the building. From the outside, you couldn’t make out the size of the building. One thing that you could discern was that it was definitely bigger than your house. This was a place that was meant to hold a lot of people.

A grand staircase stood at the centre of the main floor—the floor that you were on—and led to a second landing which branched off into opposite directions.

“The second floor is where all of the rooms are,” Kita said. He walked up beside you and pointed to the left, the hallway that Kurosu had disappeared down. “That is where Kurosu’s quarters and office are. It’s not off-limits, but no one really goes there unless they need something or it’s an emergency”—he gestured to the right— “the kitchen and training room are over there. There are smaller hallways that lead elsewhere, but I’m not sure that you’ll be staying here for that long.”

“What makes you say that?”

Kita took a step forward and then turned to face you. “I’m not sure what the deal was exactly. I overheard that picking you, specifically, was just to tick off your father. Kurosu thought that you’d be helpful in something, but since you said that you don’t have any skills for what we could use you for, he might send you back.”

You ignored the fact that you were being spoken of as if you were talked up to be a prized cattle, only for the person who brought you to realize that you couldn’t make milk. Now, you were being sent to the slaughterhouse.

“What do you think?” you asked.

“About what?”

“About this situation,” you said. “Would you have taken someone away from their family as a power move? Made them do something to settle a score?”

Kita paused. And you waited. You didn’t know how long he was going to think for his answer, but you wanted to know and it’s not like you had anything else to do.

“I would like to think that I wouldn’t. I’m sorry that this happened to you, but it’s not something that anyone else but Kurosu and your father had control over. I’m sure you’ll find a way to settle the score.”

You swallowed. Oh, he had no idea what was coming to your father.

“Does your arm hurt?” he asked calmly.

You blinked. “My arm?”

He pointed at your arm that your father had grabbed. Without a word, he carefully held your wrist and pushed up your sleeve. You winced when the bunched up cloth rolled over the spot where your father’s grip was the strongest. The faintest marks of a bruise were starting to form.

Kita dropped your arm and started walking to the right of the staircase. “Stay there.”

What was that? you thought. After a moment, you were sure that he had abandoned you. You only took a couple of steps forwards when he rounded the corner. In his hand was a blue gel pack.

He handed it to you. “Put it on your arm,” he said.

“Thank you.”

Kita nodded and then started up the stairs. “I’ll show you to your room.”

You kept your eyes busy. There was still no security of any kind, no bars on the windows, or cameras everywhere.

He stopped in front of a door. “Can I ask you something?”

The coolness of the gel pack made you shiver. “If I say no, are you still going to ask?”

“Probably.”

You sighed. “Go ahead then.”

“What did your father tell you when he pulled you aside?”

You squeezed the pack between your fingers. Kita’s eyes were marked on you, unwavering. You knew he wasn’t going to leave it alone until you answered.

There was no point in lying, is there? These were the people who you’d be staying with for who knows how long—they said a year, but that could always change and it wasn’t something that you were in control of.

“He told me to spy for him,” you told him.

“Are you going to?”

“I haven’t decided.”

Kita clicked his tongue and then opened the door. “I think you have.”

He took a step back. As you passed him, he leaned down to whisper, “I pity your father.”

Sleep did not find you. At all. Maybe it was because the room Kita showed you was so unfamiliar—and surprisingly well-furnished—that it just made you miss your own room. But your unrested mind brought you back to the fear of being axed murdered.

Your stomach growled. You frowned. Right, you were in the middle of preparing dinner before you were suddenly ripped away from your home, and now that it was in the middle of the night, you were nervous, anxious, and hungry.

You opened the door to your room. The hallway was brightly lit and empty. All of the footsteps you heard on your way up to the room had gone quiet. You turned back into your room and grabbed a candle holding that was placed on one of the mantels.

Their father’s words echoed in their brain. In an unknown place, never go without a weapon.

At least he was good for something, you thought.

Closing the door behind you, you made your way down the hallway. You recognized the familiar landmarks in the hallway that had led to the staircase—a picture frame a few doors down, a vase that stood on the podium at the corner where you had to turn.

Soon enough, you found your way back to the grand staircase. The tall door loomed over you as you placed your hand on the doorknob.

I could leave.

You began to twist it.

You jumped in alarm as a small crash sounded to the left of the hall. You glanced back at the door. It was probably locked and you didn’t have any of your stuff. How far would you have gotten? And even if you got far, where would you go?

Despite your better judgment, you followed the sound. This is how people in horror movies get killed, you thought. This hallway was darker than the one upstairs, but a strong crack of light shone through a door. You raised the candle holder.

Toe-ing the door opened, you straightened your spine and held the holder tighter. As your line of sight got wider, you saw a boy standing behind a long metal table. A backdrop of fridges and cabinets came into view. He had his head down, his rough grey hair fell in front of his forehead and eyes. He focused on something that was in hind hands.

The creaking of the door gave you away. The boy’s head jerked up, dropping what he was working on. His hand cautiously slid over the knife on the table.

His eyes locked onto yours and then travelled to the candle holder in your raised hand. He frowned. “Are you (Y/N)?”

You swallowed. “Maybe.”

The corners of his lips tugged up. “Are you going to hit me with that thing?”

“Maybe,” you repeated.

“Okay,” he said. His eyes lingered on you for another moment before he shrugged and picked up the thing he had dropped.

Were all of the Inarizaki members so...carefree? If you were back at your house, the slightest creak in the floorboards was enough cause to have security roaming around the halls.

You took a step closer. The item that he dropped was rice. You glanced at the table. A bowl of rice was beside him as well as various fillings and dishes. A cutting board that was covered in pieces of cut seaweed was in front of him. His head was back down and his hands were shaping rice into triangles.

“Are you making Onigiri?”

He met your gaze again, his eyes gleaming in a way they hadn’t before as if the topic cheered him up. “I am,” he said. He cocked his head to the side. “The finished ones are over there if you want some.”

He watched you. “Unless you want to beat me to death with a candle holder.”

You glared and tentatively put the holder down. “It would be a waste of a candle holder. It’s probably expensive too.”

“It is,” he said, “it’s also stolen.”

You scrunch your nose. “Pleasant.”

You picked up the Onigiri closest to you. It was still warm. “It’s not...poisoned is it?”

He scoffed and looked at you offendedly. “You can threaten me with a candle holder, but do not insult my food.”

You raised your eyebrows, a small smile finding its way to your mouth. “I’ll take that as a no then.”

The rice melted in your mouth. It tasted so much like your mother’s; if you closed your eyes, you could picture yourself standing back in your kitchen. Your mother would smile at you and then scold you for moulding the rice too harshly.

“A lighter touch, (Y/N),” she would say. “Take your time. No need to rush.”

“Are you okay?” the grey-haired boy asked.

You wiped your tears away hastily and turned to him. “These are really good,” you said, a light tone in your voice. You finished off the Onigiri in silence and then picked up another one. He didn’t pressure any more information out of you. “Do you need any help?”

He glanced at the bowl of rice beside him. Despite the full try of onigiri, there was still quite a bit of rice left. “Do you know how to make them?”

“My mom taught me.”

He regarded you thoughtfully. “There are gloves under the sink,” he said, “or you can just wash your hands. It doesn’t matter.”

Shortly after you washed your hands, you joined him at the table. The first few were done in silence. You focused on the repeated motion.

“I am (Y/N), by the way,” you muttered. “In case you didn’t notice.”

He chuckled. “I’ve noticed.” He paused. “Miya Osamu.”

You nodded. You slowed your pace, not wanting to go back upstairs yet.

“I heard you think that we’re going to axe murder you,” he said. When he saw you look at him, he shrugged. “Word gets around. My brother got a kick out of it.”

You jutted out your chin. “Maybe I should kick your brother.”

Osamu laughed, a sharp, cheerful sound that made you smile. “I would love to see that.” He looked at you from the corner of his eye. “We’re not that bad, you know.”

“I don’t think that you’re all spawns of demons,” you said. “I just think that it would be easier if I could...hate all of you,” you admitted. “It’s obvious that I don’t want to be here, which you probably know. I have zero skills that are helpful to Inarizaki as a whole and if I hate it here then it’ll be easier to go back.”

“To the father who gave you to us like nothing?”

You shrugged. “My mother’s there. The little details don’t matter.”

Osamu smiled. “Okay, but don’t say that you’re skill-less. You know how to make Onigiri and probably a lot more, if you ask me, that’s a solid skill in my book.”

Word gets around.

You thought about it when you parted ways with Osamu and until your eyes closed for the night. The words still lingered in your mind when you woke up.

You washed up and changed clothes.

When you had arrived at Inarizaki house, it couldn’t have been more than a couple of hours for word to get around. The members either had a way to get a message around or they were all super chatty among each other.

You frowned. Texts messages you dumbass.

“Why. Am. I. So. Stupid,” you muttered, banging your head against the door for each word. But if it was something else, you wanted to know how they did it.

Your door opened and you jumped back.

A golden-yellow head of hair popped out from the crack in the door. The boy widened the door and stood up straight. He had a lazy smirk on his face and looked like Osamu. My brother got a kick out of it.

“Did you knock?” he asked.

You narrowed your eyes. “Were you waiting for my knock?”

His lazy smirk grew. “I wait for a lot of things, lunch for one. I’ll walk you?”

You hesitated. All of the people you’ve met have been kind to you, or at least didn’t harm you, but you couldn’t be sure when that would end.

“Unless you’d rather kick me first? Word—”

“—gets around,” you finished. “I know.” You cleared your throat. “I said that your brother could watch when I did.”

He laughed. “I bet he did. Let’s go.”

He—Atsumu, he introduced—walked ahead of you, only glancing back every now and then to make sure you were following. “Were you just lying about not being able to do anything?”

“I know how to make Onigiri and I’m surprisingly good at cutting out paper hearts.”

He rolled his eyes.

You continued, “I can also hold my breath underwater for—”

“You know what I mean,” he cut off.

You grinned. “I know what I’m supposed to do, I’ve just never done any of it.”

Atsumu furrowed his eyes together. “But you know what to do.”

You matched his pace as he descended the stairs. “Is there something that you want in particular or are you just full of fun questions?

Atsumu turned around. You pulled yourself back from nearly crashing into him. He eyed you weirdly. It was reminiscent of his brother’s gaze, but it had a level of confidence and menace that made you feel like you were on the losing side.

If I’m getting axe-murdered by anyone here, it’ll definitely be by this guy, you thought. You pulled your shoulders back.

“Are you usually this straightforward?” he asked.

“Are you usually this vague?”

“I want to know what you know.”

You blinked. “Yeah, I’m not following.”

Atsumu looked around the room. There were loud sounds coming from the kitchen, but otherwise, the main room was empty. He leaned in, smirk gone. You forced yourself not to move away.

“Kurosu doesn’t tell us much in terms of how Inarizaki runs, like he just assumes that he’s going to live forever and won’t pass on any information to any of us. You, out of all odds, probably know more about how to run a gang than any of us.”

“So you want me to tell you what I know?” You shook your head. “That requires the assumption that I actually know what you want.”

“But you do,” a voice said.

You and Atsumu whipped your heads over the banister of the stairs. Kita, Osamu, Suna, and a few other people you didn’t recognize gathered to the side of the stairs.

Kita’s eye’s flashed as he took a step forward. “You can’t tell me that your father didn’t make you sit through meetings and forced information on you. I saw the way you looked around when I was showing you to your room, you were taking in information the way that Kurosu did when we went to your house, the way that we’re all trained to do. Even if you claim that you’re skilless, it doesn’t mean that you are.”

“It could be a partnership,” Atsumu suggested, his eyes back on you. “Kurosu told us this morning that you’re staying until the deal is over. Your father said it was his own fault that Kurosu didn’t verify if you had the skills or not.”

“Sounds like him,” you said. “What an ass.”

Atsumu snickered.

You went around Atsumu to level yourself with the rest of the Inarizaki members. They all had the same gleam in their eye of determination...and something else. You couldn’t put your finger on it. Atsumu footsteps followed behind you and then joined the side of the other members.

You stood away from them. “Are you going to tell Kurosu?”

“No,” Kita said.

“A partnership,” you repeated. “Doesn’t that mean we both benefit from this? Not that I really need or want anything, but there’s got to be something right? Are you going to get me a lifetime supply of ice cream?”

“We can get you that, or at least try, if that’s what you want,” Suna said, his quiet voice took over the room. “A lot can happen in a year. For instance, your father could have an unfortunate accident.”

“You want to kill him?”

Suna shrugged. “It can be arranged is what I’m saying.”

You sighed. “No killing, please.”

“Then what do you want?” Osamu asked.

You could picture yourself clearly. A year from now you would walk into your father’s house and recite all of the things that you’ve learned from Inarizaki. You would stretch the truth until it became paper-thin. You would watch your father fall so slowly, it would be as if he willingly pushed himself off the cliff

You smiled. “I’ve got a thing or two in mind.”

A lot could happen in a year and you would make the most of it.

Tackling these requests slowly because my tiny peanut brain can’t come up with any ideas of how I want stories to go.

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed - Kiwi

Posted: 16/05/2021

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