#feyre's literally the breadwinner

[jacksdreams]

No hate, but Nesta trains for a year (because Feyre made her), and she's this amazing badass warrior, but Feyre had been hunting since the age of 14, fought for Prythian since 19, and she's called a tradwife???

[elainarcheronstotebag]

Something i love that i don’t see people talk about is how each archeron sister represents a stress response.

Feyre fights. Literally and metaphorically. For so long Feyre was fighting against the odds of her and her family’s survival. While also going against societal norms of basically being a woman. She was the (albeit forced) breadwinner, and doing traditionally “masculine” tasks. Feyre didn’t abide by gender norms, and instead carved her own place in a world that she was never even meant to be in. But she also fights for her family, not just in terms of survival but by forgiving them and wanting relationships with them despite all the hardships she endured alone.

Nesta flees. Nesta and Feyre are said to literally be two sides of the same coin. Anytime something happens Nesta runs, once again literally and metaphorically. Their father gets beat up soon after their mother dies, she immediately grabs Elain and runs and hides in the room. Same with how she kept away from her sisters while in Velaris as she was coping unhealthily. Also, how Nesta refused to accept help when offered it, and was literally forced into rehab basically. The stairs literally stopped Nesta from running away. Nesta also is very emotionally unavailable throughout most of the series, she’s cold and distant because it’s the only way she feels she can protect herself.

Elain fawns. (Lol get it?) whereas both of her sisters had a hard time in society, it can be said that Elain thrived in it. Within less than a year of reentering high society, after her family had been shunned out might I add, she was able to secure a marriage to the future Lord of their region?? Just beauty and kindness isn’t enough for a match like that, that took at least some cunning and wit that was definitely wasted in the human lands. Elain perfectly adapted to human society, just as she later had to adapt to the Night Court. To secure her safety or whatever, Elain knows how to conform and modify herself for whatever world she gets thrown into, despite the constant change of expectations she finds herself in.

[elainsgirl]

I don’t think anyone generally cares if you ship Nesta and Azriel/Rhys. Everyone knows that’s a crack ship. It just gets odd when people who ship them always has to compare Nesta to her sisters - especially when they do so by degrading elain and Feyre.

There are fics in which Rhys mocks Feyre for being illiterate and saying that could never love her as much as he loves Nesta because Nesta is so much smarter. There are fics in which Azriel says Nesta is so much more beautiful than elain and he could never find elain as attractive as Nesta. The worse kinda of fics (at least to me) is when Rhys/Azriel are in a relationship with Feyre/elain but have an affair with Nesta (especially when Feyre is pregnant) because in all these fics the author has to constantly reiterate that Feyre/elain are nothing compared to Nesta. No matter how smart, kind, beautiful, resourceful they are - Nesta will always be better. In fact, all their good traits are stripped away from them while their flaws are amplified. It’s these kinda fics and headcanons that rub me the wrong way.

Feyre may not be as academically smart as her two sisters but she is resourceful. She was fourteen years old and taught herself how to hunt and make snares. She was the breadwinner for her family for years - she’s not dumb.

And when people compare the sisters’ looks it just makes me roll my eyes. Someone honestly compared the sisters’ breast sizes - as if that’s a normal thing to do to sisters (fictional or not). It’s stated multiple times by Nesta and Feyre that they think elain is the prettiest. And while that may be because they’re biased, everyone knows Elain, Nesta, and Feyre are all gorgeous.

You don’t have to love all the sisters. But why degrade them to prop your fav? It’s weird. Nesta is a wonderful character - she doesn’t need her sisters to be awful to show how wonderful she is.

Yes! Exactly, My preference aside - most of the time in these scenarios, Feyre/Elain are often hated on so Nesta can look much better and a greater fit for Rhys/Azriel.

Thankfully, I stay away from these fics so I’m trusting your words, but I can imagine just how these fics are written to showcase Nesta in a better light. Ewww…people would actually want Rhys/Az to cheat on their partners for Nesta? Thats not cute at all and is downright odd. Which I find slightly funny is the fact most of this comes from the same people that dont like Rhys yet still hypothetically want him with Nesta.

Feyre IS smart even if its not in the traditional way…literally is the sole reason both sisters are alive.

People who compare the sistsrs every single time just annoy me bcs they’re all beautiful, smart etc. There’s no need to pit them against each other, they wouldn’t even like being put against each other and constantly compared.

[rosanna-writer]

Fic Writer ask game

Thanks for the tag @whatishowedyouinthedark!

Describe your writing process from idea to posting/publishing For longer fics, I usually start with an outline. It's usually just a bullet point list of events with sub-bullets for random notes about the event (things to make sure get mentioned, scraps of dialogue I'm already thinking will be included, etc), and sometimes I'll write the summary first and throw that at the top of the document. Then I just follow the outline, mostly in order, and decide on chapter breaks as I go based on vibes. I draft pretty slowly because I clean as I go, and for canonverse-fic (especially anything that's first person Feyre POV), I stop to refer to PDF copies of the books pretty frequently to make sure things "match." Then I do a once-over, usually reading aloud, to catch typos and awkward phrasing, and then post!

Are you a plotter or a pantser? I'm a plotter for sure! I like to do all my thinking in the outline, so drafting is a brain-off, "just refer to the notes" type of deal

What do you listen to when you are writing? Nothing! I find it distracting, and I'd pause it all the time to read things out loud anyway.

What’s your drink of choice(while writing)? Coffee! I usually try to take myself on a coffee shop writing date once a week.

Promote yourself! What’s your favorite thing you’ve written? It's so hard to pick! But I have a soft spot for everything that gives me warm fuzzy feelings because I wrote it specifically with friends in mind, like I Knew You Were Trouble, The Great War, and Love At First Sight's For Suckers <3

Share a fic of yours that you think is underrated/deserves more love. with you i serve, with you i fall down, there's just not much of an audience for genfic centered around Mor's frienships (and it's a short drabble). But I think it works really nicely as a missing scene from canon

Do you have any advice for new writers? "Just keep going!!!!" feels like trite, unhelpful advice, but I think it boils down to this: it takes a loooooooong time to get decent at identifying problems in your work and fixing them because that's a skill in and of itself. There will be literal years of feeling like your work is meh but not really knowing why (that sort of "something is off, but idk what" thing), and it's frustrating as hell. All you can do is just keep going and practice until you get past it. Creative writing classes or feedback from a knowledgeable beta (i.e. someone who actually reads in your genre AND knows how to deliver criticism kindly) can speed the process along, but ultimately, the only way out is through.

What is a writing style/technique that others do really well that you'd like to get better at? "Atmospheric" writing that whisks you away somewhere else/pieces that feel "dreamy." There are SO many writers I admire who do it well (@bloomingdarkgarden, @thesistersarcheron, @popjunkie42, and @foundress0fnothing have all killed it with the otherworldly fairytale vibes), and I feel like I'm just sitting here writing the Generic Airport Novels of fic lol

Is there a character you were surprised you enjoyed writing as much as you did? Azriel! I've always liked him because a character archetype I adore is Very Sad But Very Sexy Spy. But in we said hello and your eyes look like coming home, I really didn't anticipate how healing having a quietly helpful "loyal attack dog" kind of person in her life would be for Feyre, who has her whole "years being the breadwinner burned me out because no one came through for me" complex at the forefront of her mind in that AU. Rhys combats it in more of a caretaking/mother hen/"let me be soft and spoil you because no one else did" kind of way, which I LOVE, but there's also something about Azriel's love language being a grim "it's handled" that goes so hard.

The Az that exists in my head is more or less the Night Court's Olivia Pope, and I want to write more of him quietly assassinating people/planting evidence/leaking damaging things to the press on the High Lord and High Lady's behalf.

Everyone I mentioned above can consider themselves tagged <3

[christinareadsthings]

*****Spoilers ahead*****

I’ve just gotten past the first few chapters of ACOTAR and here are my thoughts so far:

Feyre’s family sucks. It’s very clear that they aren’t helpful and have zero survival instincts. I could be wrong, but I feel like there’s a little bit of codependency in the air.

Feyre is a doormat and an enabler. Her family treats her poorly and she does nothing about it. She’s the breadwinner and the sole reason they’re still alive, but she doesn’t really stand up for herself and continuously complains in her internal monologue.

Nesta is the worst. As a child of immigrants, I have a hard time empathizing with people who find labor to be beneath them. She peaked at 5 years old and it shows.

Elain gives me Marie Antoinette - “Let them eat cake” ah vibes. She can’t fathom or literally think for a moment that she should do something to help out.

I know the fae are supposed to be horrific creatures that kill humans in gruesome ways, but I bet that they’ll still be depicted as beautiful because that’s how it is in YA romance fantasy.

[kayla-2]

When will we stop the narrative that people hate Nesta because she didn’t get her family out of debt? Literally no one hates her for not being the breadwinner of the family. Everyone knows that she was under no obligation to provide for her entire family - that’s undeniable. But as a twenty one (which she was at the start of the series) woman she DID have an obligation to provide for herself. Instead, she willingly decided to rely on Feyre - and even that I could forgive and understand. But the fact that she abused Feyre while Feyre provided for her is what makes me dislike her. Feyre sacrificed so much for her and received nothing in return.

I think people take issue with how she continually abuses her youngest sister rather than her not contributing to their family.

They know that no one hates her for not being the sole breadwinner but because every other argument for people disliking her makes sense, they try to make it seem like we’re being unreasonable. People always say that it was the parent responsibility but e.lain and n.esta weren’t two years old and were older than Feyre and if they were making the decision to take from her for years, they should’ve done everything possible to help. Not just her, but their own survival. But n.esta can’t move or do anything unless she’s forced or accidentally put into a situation so I understand why her stans are like that 🤣

[spaceheelies]

i could honestly write a review that would rival an SJM novel in length about all the problems i have with her books in terms of like the problematic relationship dynamics and toxic sexuality and the built-in heteronormativity/gender essentialism of her worldbuilding (specifically the mating bond shit) all of that. but what stands out to me more and more is just the sheer amount of socioeconomic privilege that seeps through that she refuses to reflect on or challenge in any way. and i think it is only growing more apparent with each new work, especially since she does not seem to have an editor to speak of anymore or at least seems to have full creative control.

i get that a big appeal of ACoTaR is the power fantasy. the indulgence of this idea of being a poor girl plucked out obscurity and pulled into this world of magic and stunning gowns and jewelry and the most powerful men in the world, who are all breathtakingly gorgeous powerful hunks with huge dongs and out-of-control sex drives, and they are all fighting over you, and you are so beautiful and also can use a sword and have magic powers. ok fine that’s fun. but reading something like a court of silver flames, you can simply tell the woman who wrote it has never worked in a minimum wage customer service job or had a shitty 9 to 5 in her life. listening to podcast interviews with her and things like that, she obviously comes from a very privileged background and has never had to worry about money. and i don’t want to suggest that working a shitty job or being anywhere lower than upper middle class automatically makes you a better person or gives you a fundamental understanding of the universe or whatever. judging someone for having a family or support system that can help them out financially would make me a hypocrite. however - and i can’t say this 100% because i never finished throne of glass - but sjm does not seem to know how to write from the perspective of anyone but the unfathomably wealthy and powerful. any of the few attempts she does make to write about characters who are marginalized, underprivileged, or come from a background that isn’t royalty or aristocracy is shallow at best and tone-deaf at worst.

ACoTaR literally starts with feyre almost starving to death living in a tiny cabin with a disabled father and two adult sisters who have been rendered seemingly incapable of helping her out because their previous privilege left them with a) no monetizable or useful skills and b) a debilitating sense of entitlement. there is no attempt from this point on to make any kind of significant statement about the oppression of humans in this world or the effect feyre’s previous socioeconomic status had on her worldview or the value of learning a profession anything that might be interesting. she gets whisked into the faerie world and from then on enjoys pretty much unlimited wealth, power, and privilege. the disenfranchised humans she left behind all deserved to be dirt poor and subjected to horrific fae violence because they were kind of mean to her anyways. i honest to god do not believe sjm intended to have nesta and elain become major characters when she wrote the first book, until she realized she could pair them off with other hot fae men. any meaningful statement she could have used them to make is abandoned in the face of squeezing spin-off books out of them to make more money and drag out the series.

it is so baffling to me how sjm can even write a protagonist who starts, on the first page of book one, starving and nearly homeless trying to feed four mouths single-handedly. to then look at book four and have this same girl married/mated to a man who is delegating construction on their FIFTH!!!! mansion, after a war that has canonically left a good chunk of their population destitute, homeless, and bereft of their breadwinners. the most baffling action i think i have ever seen a character take in any novel is rhysand demolishing nesta’s apartment building so she cannot move back in and therefore will have to stop drinking and sleeping around. rhysand destroys people’s homes in the middle of a housing crisis just to spite his sister-in-law, and i can’t remember if we are ever given any idea as to whether or not the other tenants of the building were relocated or if he has just left them on the streets. this is the man sjm has spent thousands of pages hammering home how good of a leader he is, how selfless, how fair. we are constantly told how good he is, what a utopia velaris is, but idk how you can sit here and tell me a character demolishing an apartment building to spite one person because he thinks she spends too much money on wine, while he is simultaneously wrapping up construction on his FIFTH!!!! mansion, does not sound like the fucking villain of the series. this is our hero. this is the utopia we are supposed to want to live in. i deadass think we are supposed to root for the idea of all the courts uniting under him as like an emperor in future books. i need to go outside and touch grass fr because it like makes me physically ill how many middle to upper class white women i see on my instagram feed propping rhysand up as the perfect romantic hero, the standard that the men in their real lives should aspire to, when he is simply an overpowered, out-of-control monster.

when the series was being told from feyre’s perspective, sjm really tried to push the fact that she WAS rhysand’s equal, that she’s the first high lady in prythian’s history, that he wants her to challenge him or whatever the fuck, hash tag girl boss slay diva werk. am i supposed to believe that the girl who started out starving and nearly homeless just sits in her fifth mansion, pregnant, painting and waving at the people and doing paperwork and being constantly available for sex while her husband is out demolishing people’s homes on a whim. i could go into even more detail about how the absurd wealth and power and privilege ties into sjm’s very obvious internalized misogyny, surface-level white feminism, inability to challenge gender roles in any truly significant way, and often even enforce those gender roles, but this post is already way longer than i thought it was going to be and it is 3 in the morning i have to go to bed.

the very last thing i have to say is that it’s boring. reading thousand page books where everyone is rich, overpowered, hot, unkillable, and young forever is fucking boring. sick of this shit. where are the ugly people where are the poor people. there is no spice of life

[mor-rigan]

I've seen people suggest that nesta was the one abused as feyre had financial power over her and I'm like???? before velaris feyre had to try and hide more or her sisters would spend it all and in velaris they paid nesta who still wasted more money and refused to work for it

Yeah, Nesta was no breadwinner, and complained about literally anything she had to do to help around the cottage. Literally one of the first interactions we had with her, she wanted new shoes rather than, y’know, food.

[stargirlfeyre]

Someone said that Nesta would beat up Rhys if she knew what he did to Feyre UTM. Then in the comments saying that he never apologized for it (This is from a Nesta Stan account)

And said that if Feyre had kept the money over the sister’s head then it would have been financial abuse cause she was the breadwinner of the family 💀

So Feyre not giving away money SHE worked for is now financial abuse? Telling someone that you won’t pay their rent unless they give you something as basic as respect is not financial abuse😭. It’s literally just the norm. Most people who are providing for someone else demand at least a thank you. The mental gymnastics these people do to try and justify Nesta’s actions and paint Feyre out to be the villain.

And honestly Nesta wouldn’t beat Rhys’s ass for how he treated Feyre because one Nesta doesn’t give a fuck who hurts Feyre and two Nesta is all bark and no bite. This girl makes a lot of threats but she rarely ever backs it up. Didn’t Rhys offer to fight her and she stayed silent? Okay.

[n3sta]

you’re entire point about tamlin not knowing better/ not knowing what a healthy romantic relationship is like is ENTIRELY fabricated, like in the books, it says tamlin’s father was against the liberation of humans. nothing was ever said about his mother or father’s romantic relationship specifically, and it’s clear it’s been a while since you have read the books. secondly, i think it’s PRETTY DAMN FUCKING CLEAR that you should never lose control of your temper and lash out violently, which he did prominently TWICE in his study, the second time leading to hurting feyre so bad her fae healing didn’t even completely heal it for like a week. and like feyre said, in the beginning tamlin treated her right, gave her the tools she needed and opportunity to be herself and finally have the time to be an artist which she always wanted UNTIL she had served her purpose, and broke amarantha’s curse, and then locked her up and wanted her only to be lady of the spring court, docile and submissive. he didn’t care she was losing weight and was depressed. he literally only used her for sex... a tool! nesta’s mother was inattentive towards all over her children and focused mainly on parties, she died when feyre was nine and when nesta was about 11. that’s the love you’re talking about?? or are you talking about their father, who watched them starve near to death and didn’t try to fix it, after losing all their money. nesta tells feyre she has a strength in her that their father or elain doesn’t have, that she fights tooth and nail (paraphrasing). feyre didn’t need nesta’s care, like elain. furthermore, let me stress that the burden of being the breadwinner of the household shouldn’t have fallen on neither feyre or nesta as they were children, it was the father’s (which he didn’t step up to). you can’t blame nesta, who had been raised until 13 yrs of age in a completely different lifestyle and social class for not being able to adapt to hunting in the woods. also, feyre is selfless (most of the time), she gave that money to nesta AND elain. and the whole ‘abuse’ ?? i wouldn’t call it that, i’d call it lashing out on your siblings when you’re cramped in a two roomed house and are constantly on the brink of starvation. her character is not perfect, which makes her so great, as she’s so complex and 3D. she’s flawed and i’m not defending her tendency to be nasty. but it is not abuse, tamlin’s behaviour was. nesta protects elain, and tries to do the same for feyre. see the entirety of acowar and how nesta was not fooled by the glamour and tried to cross the wall to save her (this takes incredible guts, and shows how much she cares for feyre).

in acofas, nesta is struggling with ptsd and depression. her body has been violated and torn apart and rebuilt into fae before she even became fully comfortable with them. she had to risk her life, fully expecting to die, had to watch her father die, and watch as her sister was forced into the cauldron as well and then the long period where she was just lifeless. nesta was there for elain. however, feyre holding rent money over nesta, which she needs to survive in a world she never wanted to live in, to force her to come to the party (helping nesta only in a way feyre herself believes will be helpful, and not in the way nesta wants/needs) and then... the whole ic ignoring her? even feyre not buying her a present? that’s not okay. and she is entitled to the money, she never asked to be fae. nesta does not accept rhys offers of jobs, because she knows this is out of his love for feyre, and not because she’s rlly wanted (he actually hates her and it’s despicable!) and that’s why she doesn’t accept. no one rlly is welcoming towards her, like they think she’s so strong that she can deal with how terrible they treat her but she is so broken! apart from the beginning of acotar, when did nesta go out of her way to hurt feyre...? she risked her life for her, distracting the king of hybern, and she helps out in the high lord meeting. she saved cassian like twice from death. and TAMLIN definitely did hurt feyre, countless times, so much so i can’t believe some of it was not intention *cough* study *cough*.

y’all rlly hate strong willed women. pls re read the books and understand that nesta can’t just be all sunshine and roses when confronted by fae who she’s been taught since her birth to fear, and then kidnapped and turned into one. she is incredibly selfless, seen by her trying and trying to save the people in her village/ the mortal realms. it is incredibly realist that she has problems mentally after the war with hybern. i hate how in acofas they just basically give up on, but after feyre suffered from ptsd after under the mountain everyone was there willing to help her even when she lashed out countless times also. anyway BYEE

Why Nesta is worse than Tamlin

Before we start: I dont like Tamlin, I think he is a horrible person who has done many horrible things. This is in no way trying to paint him as a good guy, because he isn’t.

*sidenote: I haven’t reread the Acotar series in over a year so some of my details may be a little bit off. In addition some of these points are inferences and not stated fact*

With that being said,I will explain my deep rooted hatred for nesta in this post, and if you want to see more of why I hate her I have another post on my page. Also I’m not looking for an argument or hate, just to express my opinion and possibly find others who share it as well as maybe allow people who disagree to see the character in a different way.

1. Tamlin didn’t know better, Nesta did. Tamlin had never really been shown love before. Tamlin’s father was a horrible man with what we can assume little or no empathy towards others. Tamlin says his father was as bad as Luciens, or worse. With this information we can assume that he was not a very loving man and didn’t treat his sons well. We can also assume that his mother was likely like Lucien’s, meek and not attentative to her children. Tamlin likely never realized how he treated Feyre was wrong because he never saw a relationship that was better than that. He loved her in the only way he knew how. Nesta however, knows what a good relationship should look like and how to treat other people. She treats Elain well and not at all like she treats Feyre. She dotes and protects Elain, while she ignores and abuses Feyre. Nesta knows better and we know she knows better because she treats Elain better.

2. In the end Tamlin does what he has to for Feyre to be happy (resurrecting Rhys) even though he loves her and is helping out his enemy he cares enough about her to shove his feelings aside. Nesta however never comes through for Feyre, she takes and takes and never gives back. She acts entitled to everything Feyre offers and is never grateful. She refuses to get a job, but still expects to be handed money(this occurs both at the beginning and ending of the series). Never does Nesta, at her own free will, shove aside what she wants for her sister.

3. Tamlin never tried to hurt Feyre, Nesta did. Tamlin hurt Feyre in so many ways, but these come from what I said in the first point, he didn’t know what he was doing was wrong. Nesta fron the very beginning went out of her way to hurt Feyre. For example, She spent money on luxuries when Feyre couldn’t even afford essentials for herself. She went out of her way to try and cause Feyre distress.