#final projects and everything is also not helping

[winter-soldier-buck]

heart by heart ♡ b.b

pt. 2

pairing: thunderbolts!bucky barnes x singlemom!fem!reader

warning: uhhhh no new ones i can think of tbh

word count: 3.4k

author’s note: ahhh this took longer to write than i intended, my writer's block was BAD... also... shark week. iykyk. anyways, please let me know what you think of pt. 2 🥹 any and all feedback is greatly appreciated 🫶🏻

series masterlist

New York City, USA - August 2024

Tears streamed down your face as you lay in a fetal position on the cold tile floor of your kitchen, wondering where the hell you went wrong in life that would’ve meant leading to that exact predicament. On the bright side, though, you weren’t hyperventilating anymore and were pretty sure the panic attack had passed.

Slowly, you took another deep, calming breath and pushed yourself up from the ground so you could sit with your back against a cupboard door, resting your left hand gently on top of your 25-week-along baby bump.

Dealing with an unexpected pregnancy alone because your partner of over eight years left, well, less if counting the blip, went zero-contact as a way to keep you ‘safe’ before you even knew you were expecting was one thing. Being told that bed rest was required for the remainder of said pregnancy because of severe pre-eclampsia difficulties, while having no family in the city anymore to help keep your mind at ease during an already strenuous time, was another.

You’d never felt more alone in your life.

The evening had started fine. You got home from your doctor’s appointment half an hour prior, still processing the news that you’d have to spend the last almost three months of your pregnancy on strict bed rest. You were lucky when it came to work because switching to working from home wasn’t a problem. No more site visits were required for your most recent architectural projects, and you were in the early design stages of others. The timing couldn’t have been more right in that sense, and you tried convincing yourself that you could make do with your bed rest prescription.

What you didn’t take into account was how heavy life had already been feeling. That, since Bucky left and you discovered you were pregnant, you’d done an excellent job at pretending everything was fine when, in actuality, it felt like your life was tearing apart at the seams.

Bed rest was the unrealized icing on your already crumbling cake, which you didn’t realize until you got home from the doctor’s and accidentally dropped one of the strawberries you’d just washed to have for a snack onto the floor. Once you heard the berry hit the tile, you crouched down to pick it up. However, given how such a simple task became more difficult over time with your growing baby bump, you lost your balance and toppled over onto the ground, too.

You weren’t hurt, which you were thankful for, but you felt embarrassed and frustrated, which ultimately was the tipping point of the pent-up emotions you already had. The panic attack started shortly after.

It wasn’t until then that you finally accepted that you were not doing well. You still felt claustrophobic even as you worked to calm your pounding heart with more calming breaths and wiped away your tears with the back of your hand.

You felt trapped. It wasn’t just your apartment making you feel so confined anymore; it was New York City as a whole. You moved to the city with Bucky and created a life together. Now you had nowhere to go with so much going wrong, despite everything, including your pregnancy, reminding you of him. How the hell were you going to improve your state while being on bed rest alone for another three months?

To you, everything that could go wrong was doing just that. However, you needed to calm down. Hyperventilating on the kitchen floor wasn’t going to make the overall situation better for you or your baby.

“What am I going to do?” You whispered to yourself, voice cracking with another sob.

That’s when it hit you. You weren’t so alone after all, and you did indeed have somewhere you could go. It was somewhere that had been a place of solace for you years ago, and had people who welcomed you with open arms. It was a location that would forever be a safe haven where you were always welcome.

Quickly, you scrambled to get up off the floor and grab your phone from where it sat on the counter. Once it was unlocked, you scrolled through your contacts but paused when you clicked the name of the person you knew you could reach out to. Part of you didn’t want to bother them, but another part knew it wouldn’t be a bad thing to reach out. So, with another shaky breath, you hit the call button.

They picked up on the second ring.

“Hello, my friend,” the familiar female voice greeted, making you let out a cry of relief. You hadn’t realized how much you missed her. “Is everything alright?”

You nodded even though she couldn’t see.

“It will be,” you said, mainly to convince yourself as you sniffled. “But, right now, I need help.”

The Princess of Wakanda fell silent for a moment, worrying you when all you could hear from the other end was shuffling around, along with a series of beeps and clicks.

“Shuri?”

“Sorry, I needed to get comfortable and was pulling up your location. Tell me everything.”

~*~

New York City, USA - Late 2027

“Piggies or bunnies?” You asked from where you stood behind your daughter as you finished brushing her deep brown hair, then looked at her reflection in the large vanity mirror, since she hadn’t answered your question. However, she was too distracted by looking at your various skincare products that lay on the counter nearby to pay any attention to what you were saying. “Penny.”

She blinked, then immediately moved her blue-eyed gaze to meet yours in the mirror. The same eyes she inherited from her father that hit you like a truck each time you took a good look at them.

“Yeah, mommy?” She questioned innocently.

God, she was cute and she knew it too.

“How do you want me to do your hair today, babe? I can do piggies or bunnies. Oh! Or, if you’d like, we can keep your hair down and pull the front back in braids so it stays out of your face. What do you think?”

Penny looked at herself in the mirror, then pursed her lips in deep contemplation, acting as though it were the most important decision she’d ever have to make. It blew your mind that she was just weeks away from being a threenager, even though the attitude was already there.

“Braids!”

“You got it, darlin’,” you replied, then leaned forward to place a quick peck on her cheek before getting to work.

Once Penny’s hair was done, you helped her down off the bathroom counter, and the two of you headed to her bedroom together.

Laid out on the papasan chair that resided in her room was the collection of clothes she wanted to wear that day, but couldn’t decide which ones. Her indecisiveness was a trait you knew she inherited from you. Still, it made you chuckle as you ultimately combined a New York Rangers t-shirt with the pair of black denim jeans she selected since they were the only options that were remotely suitable for a casual day out in the city. After some convincing, she finally agreed to wear a cream-coloured cardigan as well since you reminded her of the crisp Autumn air that’d taken over NYC in typical late-November fashion.

When it was time to head out, you looked over Penny’s bedroom once more to make sure you weren’t forgetting anything, and then your gaze landed on the top of her dresser. Amongst the collection of hair accessories and play jewelry, tucked back against the wall, were two items that never moved from their safe spots on the tall surface, mainly because Penny couldn’t reach them yet.

The first item was a beautiful, small, hand-carved and painted wooden flag of Wakanda with the words “Little Wolf” etched onto its back. That, along with the white wolf plushie Penny slept with every night, was gifted to you for her from Shuri, Okoye and Ayo when she was born.

The second item was a framed picture of Bucky, which you took years ago of him smiling and unsuspecting that his photo was being snapped. It was one of your favourite photos of him, which was why you chose it to reside in Penny’s room when you first brought her home.

Since then, from time to time, you would show her the picture and tell her who it was. She knew the man in that image was her dad, but she didn’t know him or what Bucky being her dad meant. She didn’t understand why he wasn’t around and never asked either. Given that Penny wasn’t quite three years old yet, she was accustomed to life being her and her mom against the world.

Which was why you grew more anxious about going out with each passing second. However, you forced a brave face.

“Pen,” you started, moving your stare back to the toddler. “Do you remember what we’re doing today?”

“Ice cream!” She exclaimed and looked up at you with a big smile as you moved toward her, then crouched so you’d be closer to eye level.

“Yes, we are going to get ice cream. But, do you remember what else we’re gonna do?”

Her eyes widened.

“The park!”

You giggled at how excited she was getting.

“Heck yeah, we are,” you told her, unable to stop smiling as you observed her. “While we’re at the park, though, someone is going to meet us there. He’s an old friend of Mommy’s. Is that ok with you if he joins?”

“Sure, Mama,” Penny nodded, still grinning at you before she crashed into you for a hug.

Your heart swelled so much it felt like it could burst. You wasted no time returning her hug, holding her tight against your chest while you kissed the top of her head.

“Perfect. I love you, Bubba.”

“Love you too, Mommy.”

~*~

Being a true New Yorker, you knew all the hidden gems the city had to offer. However, you couldn’t deny that tourists were onto something when it came to certain spots.

Central Park, despite being a major tourist attraction, was one of your favourite spots in NYC, and Penny inherited that love for the park too. It was a special spot for both of you, a love you shared.

This was why you felt indifferent about it being where Penny would meet Bucky, even though she didn’t understand the significance of him being the ‘old friend’ of yours she was meeting. However, Central Park was one of her safe spaces, which was why you agreed for their inevitable meeting to be there.

It’d been over two weeks since you reconnected with Bucky in that coffee shop. Since then, he’d given you plenty of space. He kept in contact with you, which took some getting used to, but you liked it. You missed him, which was a flurry of emotions you weren’t ready to address just yet.

One thing that really got you during those two weeks was how Bucky didn’t press you about meeting Penny once. You had set a boundary, promising him that meeting Penny would happen when you were ready, which Bucky respected. When he reached out to you, he’d ask little things like how your day was going, which, in the long run, meant a lot and complicated that array of emotions you were already feeling when it came to him.

But, at the same time, you expected nothing less from him. It was Bucky who set the standard you had for men to be set so high. It was part of the reason you hadn’t moved on with anyone romantically after he left. Not because you were holding out, hoping he’d come back, but because he made you realize how very few men there truly were in this world of boys.

Because of how deferential Bucky was about meeting Penny, you started feeling guilty for dragging it out. After some consideration, the night prior, you reached out to him asking if he was free to meet you and Penny the following day. Bucky jumped at the opportunity.

You both agreed on convening at Central Park in the afternoon, which was why you planned a little Mommy/Penny date day out of it.

Penny held your hand as the two of you strolled around Bethesda Terrace, one of her favourite spots in the entire park. She thought the terrace was beautiful, and the architect in you couldn’t agree more. It was a place you’d both people watch, while just enjoying each other’s company.

However, you already knew this day in your spot with Penny wasn’t going to be as peaceful, but it still would’ve been impossible to predict what was to come as the two of you sat down by the fountain together.

“So,” you started, smiling while tucking a stray piece of hair behind Penny’s ear. “Do you know what kind of ice cream you’re going to get, little miss?”

She glanced up at you with an unimpressed expression, as if asking you why you were asking stupid questions.

“Mommy,” Penny replied and raised an eyebrow at you. She knew that you knew what her favourite was.

You chuckled.

“Ah. Chocolate, right?”

Penny scowled.

“Nilla.”

“Of course,” you responded, still laughing at the pout she continued staring at you with. “You know I’m just messing. I’ll get your Vanilla ice cream, don’t you worry.”

Penny nodded in approval, then went back to people-watching.

After a moment of observing her, you shook your head at the little diva you were raising, then pulled your phone from your coat pocket, knowing it had to be nearing the time Bucky said he’d meet you both. Sure enough, there was a missed text from him. However, there was another missed text and seeing their name had you feeling hit by a wave of guilt.

It was Caleb, the guy you’d been talking to for just over two months.

Caleb was great. He was kind, charismatic and genuinely seemed so into you. You liked him a lot, too. He was the only guy that you’ve really felt anything for since Bucky left. Any others just consisted of miserable first dates that didn’t evolve into anything else.

But Caleb was different. However, you’d unintentionally put him on a bit of a back burner once Bucky showed back up in your life again, which had you feeling terrible.

You stared at his text thread in your phone for a moment but ultimately decided not to open it. He deserved a proper response from you, and your mind was too scattered because of what was about to happen, to give that to him.

Exhaling, you put your phone back in your pocket, not responding to either man as you joined Penny in observing the people nearby.

Immediately, your gaze fell on a man standing about 20 feet away who was dressed head to toe in black. Normally, seeing someone wearing such an outfit in a place like New York wouldn’t faze you, but for some reason, this man was staring right at you. Unmoving amongst the swarm of people that buzzed past him.

Nothing about the man seemed familiar to you, so you glanced over your shoulder to see if he was looking at someone else behind you. There was no one there, which made you feel on edge.

You whipped your head forward again to look at the man, but suddenly, he was gone, as if you’d imagined him being there in the first place.

“You ok, Mama?” Penny asked, snapping you out of your daze as she looked up at you with a concerned expression.

“Yes, baby, I’m fine-,” you started, but cut yourself when a familiar voice sounded nearby, immediately pulling your attention to them.

“I really don’t know why you’re still following me,” Bucky grumbled as he weaved through the bystanders on the other side of the fountain, looking handsome as hell in his dark grey button-down jacket. “I said I was fine and wanted to be alone.”

“You were weird today,” a woman with short blonde hair and a thick accent replied, keeping up with him effortlessly. “I want to know what’s wrong with you. Would you rather me follow you in secret?”

“I’d rather you didn’t follow me at all. I have a life outside of you guys, you know?”

“No, you don’t, Bucky. You love us. We’re a team, we should-.”

“Bucky, hi,” you greeted, standing up as the two approached. You felt awkward interrupting them, but if you didn’t say anything, they would’ve walked right past.

“Y/N,” Bucky said, coming to a stop. His hard expression softened once he laid eyes on you. Then, his gaze moved to Penny, and you could see the flurry of emotions flashing in those beautiful blues. However, before he could say anything more, the woman he was with cleared her throat, making him jump. “Right, uh, Y/N, this is Yelena. We’re coworkers. She wasn’t supposed to be here.”

“Teammates,” Yelena corrected, rolling her eyes at Bucky before she surveyed you. “Y/N, that name sounds familiar.”

“Oh, well, I knew Nat quite well,” you told her, smiling softly. “That could be why. She told me a lot about you.”

Yelena nodded, smiling back.

“You knew my sister. How you knew her, I’m assuming, has to do with how you know Bucky.”

“Yeah, something like that. Bucky and I have known each other for a long time.”

“We used to date,” Bucky stated firmly.

“Used to?” Yelena asked. “She must’ve come to her senses.”

You chuckled, shrugging as you looked back down at Penny, who was observing the other two unsurely as she partially hid behind your leg from where she stood next to you.

“And this is my daughter, Penelope,” you continued, reaching down to grab Penny’s hand, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “Penny, this is Bucky and Yelena. Bucky is the friend I was telling you about. Can you say hi?”

Penny was silent for a moment, her eyes locked on Bucky. She blinked a few times, not looking away from him as she studied his features. You wondered if she recognized him from the picture in her bedroom, but was unable to connect that it was the same person.

“Hi,” Penny replied meekly, then inched closer to you. She was so incredibly shy.

Squeezing her hand again, you looked back at Bucky and Yelena.

Your knees almost gave out at the way Bucky looked at Penny. He studied her as though he thought she might disappear on him at any second, but looked completely mesmerized by her as he did so. Acting like he needed to memorize every perfect little thing about her as though his life depended on it. He was in complete awe of her, and it showed.

“Cute kid,” Yelena said, kind of ruining the moment.

“Hi, Penny,” Bucky spoke in a soft, gentle voice. The slightest bit of tears welled in his eyes as he smiled widely. “I’m so happy to meet you.”

You remained silent as you observed Bucky, but became distracted when Yelena noticeably kept looking between him and Penny.

“She kind of looks like you,” Yelena started, then gasped, eyes widening as realization washed over her. “Wait. Wait, wait, wait a minute.”

Bucky’s eyes narrowed at her.

“Yelena,” he warned.

“You two used to… is she? You have a kid!?”

“It’s complicated.”

“Complicated?” Yelena asked incredulously. “No way. This is GREAT news. I can’t wait to tell the others. But, why are you acting like you just met her for the first time?”

“That’s because he just met her for the first time,” you chimed in, not missing the way Bucky nodded at you in thanks. “It’s a really long story.”

Yelena looked flabbergasted.

“Wow.”

“Yeah,” Bucky responded, awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he refused to make eye contact with Yelena. However, his stare fell back onto Penny, making him noticeably relaxed. “Not exactly how I imagined this going.”

“It’s ok, we just-,” you started but cut yourself again when footsteps stopped behind you and someone spoke.

“Y/N, I wasn’t expecting to see you here,” a man said, making you freeze.

Slowly, you turned around, once again wondering where the hell you went wrong in life and how it could’ve led you to this exact moment. Because, on top of everything else going on, there stood Caleb.

taglist 🫶🏻: @avengersfan25 @wonwoosthetic @xprloki @ordelixx @cherrypieyourface @xhazzz @avafaustus @lazyneonrabbitt @lovely-seb @a-book-lover-things @herejustforbuckybarnes @capswife @avivarougestan @vicmc624 @sebastians-love @chiyayaa @mcueveryday @buckysdoll1940 @mattyblover07 @alicetesser

[nordsea-horizons]

hey, i just checked out your nixie island and like... how? you've probably been asked this before, but how on earth did you get so good at it? did you follow tutorials for terraforming? follow inspiration pictures? i always get really stuck terraforming and end up spending hours on one small chunk. how fast do you usually work on things? like.. just how!

hi, thank you for visiting nixie🍃 its def a hard question to answer, bc the main thing is just practice i think? ive done so many islands in this game its only natural i’d get better and better at making my ideas come to live, i promise you i did not start out like that at all! however i do have a few things ive actively done, since i also like challenges in themes and terraforming projects. So i can at least share that!

• making a plan ahead of time, a drawing or just in your mind(or an inspo picture from anothers island maybe) - and having a focus point! like if you wanna make a viewpoint you set up the whole build around that one tree in the distance that you wanna be able to see in the end and make sure you build everything else around it with that goal in mind(in general doing a small test build of layout before commiting has helped me a lot)

• checking out da’s with the kind of terraforming you want and looking at the creators maps! it can be hard to see how a build is made by just walking on an island but you can see a lot of the actual layout from the dream address map! for example on nixie i did a sunken landbridge..

so if you wanted to do a similar thing you could take inspiration directly from the way i made the double inclines or maybe the amount of space needed or whatever gives you trouble? (for my first forest island i had to do this for a sunken pathway bc i just couldnt picture exactly how much space i needed to clear in order to fit in everything)

but also just give it a go without holding back! you can always take it down again after all? all my final posts never reveal how many times i had to redo an area or that one time i ran out of space and had to move the entire build two spaces forward and almost ragequit animal crossing😅 it really is something you can practice and everyone works differently! and for massive builds and stuff like that, there were likely a lot more struggle than it seems behind it✨

[coffeewasamistake]

Interview with Eddie Munson

(read part one)

For the Mini Pride Bingo hosted by @genderthings.

[AO3]

Prompt: Representation | Rating: Gen | WC: 2121 | Relationships : Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Corroded Coffin&Eddie Munson Tags: Rock star Eddie Munson, interview

Summary:

A year after coming out on live TV, Rock star Eddie Munson finally ends his media break for an exclusive interview. Between a solo album and his personal projects, he has a lot to say.

Last Tuesday I had the pleasure of meeting renowned guitarist, singer and songwriter Eddie Munson. We talked about his new album, Forbidden Fruit, and his decision to sign this album alone, his future projects with Corroded Coffin, and what he hoped the future had in store for him. 

Martha Collins: So, Mr. Munson…

Eddie Munson: Eddie, please. [He smiles.] Mr. Munson is what the cops call my uncle.

M.C. : Right. Eddie then. I’m Martha.

E.M. : I know! I kinda choose you myself for this interview. [He winks at me.]

M.C. : Oh, that’s great to hear! Now, Eddie, after five albums signed under the Corroded Coffin name, you’ve surprised everyone with a more personal creation. Tell me, what made you decide to write a solo album? No troubles with the rest of the band, I hope?

E.M. : Oh, I spent last Friday afternoon helping Jeff get his kid’s puke out of the carpet, so believe me, we’ve never been closer! No, the thing is, I wrote a lot of songs that weren’t really Corroded Coffin material in the last decade, and with everything that happened last year, I felt it was time to properly work on that. So, I spent some time in the studio, and before I knew it, I had an album ready.

M.C. : When you say, “everything that happened last year,” you mean your coming-out on live TV and the subsequent backlash that occurred. 

E.M. : Yeah. I had wanted to say these words for a long time now, but I was afraid of what people would say, and the consequences not only for me but also for the rest of the band. 

M.C. : A lot of people have declared after your coming-out that you weren’t good enough for metal anymore. [He scoffs] With this solo album, which, if I understand correctly, is radically different from Corroded Coffin’s usual style, aren’t you worried about being rejected by your fans again?

E.M. : Listen, I really don’t care if me or my music offend people. That’s our whole thing. If they want to spat in my face because my music is suddenly “wrong" in their eyes, when two years ago I was their idol, then they are no better than the people judging them for their own beliefs and their taste in music. They would sound just like the ones who scream that metal is the work of the devil, and I don’t have time for their hypocrisy. I walk to my own rhythm.

M.C. : So this album is what, an act of rebellion?

E.M. : In some ways, yes, it is an act of rebellion. My music always is. I don’t think I ever wrote a single song without a hint of revolt in it. Even my love songs. Especially them, I think, because when I wrote about love, there was always the reminder that society hated it. Hated me. Hated what I’m sharing with Stevie. That I had to hide who’s my muse because otherwise my label would throw me out with the trash. But now it’s different. I’m not hiding anymore, I’m embracing it. Throwing it back in people’s faces, in a way. Nothing about me conforms to society’s idea of what is "right," or "normal," and that’s okay. So, I guess this album is about rebelling against the system, just like my work with the boys [the other members of Corroded Coffin], but in a more personal way. It’s the quiet rebellion of choosing to be yourself, no matter what.

M.C. : So Forbidden Fruit is about love, amongst other things? 

E.M. : It’s a lot about love, yeah. I talk about my relationship with Stevie, everything that hurt about it and all the ways it makes me feel alive. Why our love is worth the pain, you know? But it’s not just a Stevie-and-I lovefest. I talk about other people too. Prom Queen is about a good friend of mine who struggled a lot with parental and peer pressure, including her choice in romantic partners, and a lot of other very difficult issues. And all of it was tied to this obligation she thought she had to conform to the image other people had of her. It hurt her deeply, and getting past these hindrances was a complicated journey. So Prom Queen is a song dedicated to her strength.

Now, on the other side we have Malboro Boy. This song is about that guy I hated in high school, who clearly felt like he had to be his most aggressive self, like he had to be top dog, you know? If he wanted to be a real man. He’s the reason why Stevie is hard of hearing by the way.

M.C. : How so?

E.M. : Well, real men fight, so, of course, he had to deal with everything with his fists. [His laugh is bitter.] Basically, Steve put himself before Billy, that’s the guy’s name, and one of the kids he baby-sat, and he got his face pummeled in. He got a concussion, and an ear that barely work and rings more often than not. And these two stories are about the same problem, but they don’t end the same way. My friend Chrissy had a very close brush with death and it really changed how she saw life, so she escaped all the conformity, the heteronormativity, you know? But Billy never had the occasion to grow past all the fucked up ideas that had been put in his head by assholes and society as a whole. And even if he was a real bastard, he didn’t deserve that. That’s an important part of the album, I think, this idea that you deserve better than the chains of conformity. Everyone should be free to present themselves to the world as they really are, and I hope my music can help some people in this aspect.

M.C. : That’s a great reason to share these songs with your fans, Eddie. But now, you briefly talked about your partner Steve, and how you sing about your relationship with him. Is that him on the cover?

E.M. : Oh, the cover. Let me tell you, I heard a lot of shit about that cover from basically everyone I know. Apparently, it was very romantic of me, which, okay. I admit, it can be seen like that. I did put my boyfriend on my cover album after all. But there was no need for everyone to heckle me for it!

M.C. : I’m pretty sure friends are contractually obligated to do that.

E.M. : If they aren’t, they hide it well. But yeah, that’s Stevie. Half-naked. Biting in an apple.

M.C. : And the apple is bleeding.

E.M. : Eating the forbidden fruit is fun, but it can hurt. You gotta know what you’re signing up for. Life’s tough like that.

M.C. : Are you the forbidden fruit? For Steve.

E.M. : Our love is the forbidden fruit. First because of the whole gay thing, because according to a lot of angry people, boys aren’t supposed to kiss boys. You just can’t do that. I wasn’t supposed to touch Steve, kiss him, fuck him, and I was certainly not supposed to fall in love with him. That’s like, the first rule of conformity. Love thy neighbor, but not too much if you can’t make babies together. And on top of that huge interdiction, there was a second layer, the social one. I was not even supposed to be friends with my man, because before being Stevie, he was King Steve. The guy who planned the best parties, ran with jocks like him, dated cheerleaders and was captain of two sports teams. Two! The top of the top of the fucked up little society high school was. And me? I was at the bottom of the ladder. I was a nerd, a freak, and a rumored satanist. I couldn’t touch the King. It would have been a crime.

M.C. : But you did fall in love.

E.M. : Yes, and that’s the best thing in my life, our love, but when we were teenagers, you would have never believed we were going to end up together. Our love was definitely of the forbidden kind, but hell did we bite the fruit. And even now, after all these years, we’re still fighting everything and everyone to keep loving each other.

M.C. : It impacted your work pretty badly. Last year, when you came out, it was not just your fans who reacted to it. Your label dropped you. Did the rest of the band resent you for that?

E.M. : No, never. But, you know, I would not have come out without their approval. Because I’m not just Eddie, I’m Eddie Munson from Corroded Coffin, so everything I do has an impact on the boys. In fact, they were the one who convinced me to do it. We had a fight or two about it. They knew hiding my relationship with Stevie was hurting me deeply, and they all decided that we could take the fall. We’ve made a few albums, Stevie forced us to be clever with our money, we were not going to end up on the streets. And Jeff had a baby on the way, so we needed to take a break anyway. I was just scared to take that step. In the end, that whole stupid rumor made me lose my shit a little, and yeah. I did it. 

M.C. : Your real fans will be happy to hear you did not fight about it. Does that mean we can hope for a new Corroded Coffin album in the coming years? Maybe a tour? And what about another Eddie album?

E.M. : Yes, maybe, yes. I’m already working on songs for the band. I’m always sharing a little something with the boys when I see them. It’s going slow, because my solo music and our personal lives get in the way, but it’s going. A tour… It’s more complicated. Jeff is a dad now, and Gareth is looking a bit too wide-eyed when he holds the kid. And I’m not even talking about Stevie, he’s a pile of goo every time a child is involved. So we might not go on tour for a few years. Can’t leave babies at home for too long without seeing them. But if you’re already asking for a second solo album, don’t worry. I haven’t used all my material, and I’m leaving full time with my muse, so… The inspiration is not drying out, believe me.

M.C. : You’re thirty-three, your bandmates are having children… Are you thinking about fatherhood?

E.M. : That’s the plan, yes. Of course, it’s not as easy for us as for the guys, because we don’t have the bits for it, but we have great people around us. We’ve talked about it with Stevie’s best friend and her girlfriend, and yeah, we… we’re going to be parents. Soon, I hope. It’s going to be sort of a communal baby, but that just means they’ll be even more loved! And it’s reassuring, in a way, to know my child will never be left without a parent, even if I have to go on tour, or if something happens to me. And Stevie would not have to raise them alone either. [He smiles sadly.] Sorry, that was a really depressing thing to say! But I didn’t exactly grow up with two loving parents, so…

M.C. : You lost your mother young, didn’t you? Do you think she would be proud of the man you’ve become?

E.M. : [His expression softens.] Yes, she would be so proud. I don’t know if I believe in like, God, or anything, but I hope there’s an afterlife, and she can see me. She taught me how to play guitar, you know. She made me love music. Now I have a career as a guitarist and a singer, I have great friends around me, a man I love by my side, and I’m planning to have a child of my own. What’s not to be happy about?

M.C: No, I think you’ve made it. You won at life.

E.M. : Ah! I definitely did.

M.C. : I think we’re reaching the end of this interview. Do you have anything else to say for your readers?

E.M. : Believe in your dreams, I guess. Never let other people kill your creativity or your identity. Love who you love. And stay true to your friends, always. Family is made of people life gifts to you, and people you choose. Keep choosing them in everything you do.

[hufflezki]

Hii! I've loved everything I've read from your account so far and wanted to request something of course only if you're interested/have time ✨️🫶

This is a Sirius x reader situation.

I was thinking a reader maybe like Malfoy little sister or any other pureblood family, and she is a "rebel" just like Sirius. The reader and Regulus could be classmates or know each other because they migh have classes together, partnering for projects, childhood friends or something like that...but since she's also different/same situation as Sirius, he [Sirius] might feel attracted to her because he feels like she understands, so he asks his brother for help to get her attention, in a way reader could be a bridge between the Black brothers, like Regulus' best friend and Sirius' partner/gf?. She might end up taking Regulus with her from Black Manor.

Thank youu, sorry if this is long idk how detailed it should be a request 😭 no problem if you decide not to write it 💕

[ 🦢 ᝰ.ᐟ ] thank you for requesting, loviee<33 sorry if this took a little while. I also ended up changing some things, but I hope you don't mindd!

-> sirius black x gn!reader, who doesn't share the same beliefs as her pureblood family, reader and regulus are close friends, james potter being a wingman, the black brothers live in the potter manor, word count: 1,233

“Come on, Jamie, don't tell me you’re not even a little bit curious?” Sirius whisper-yells at his bespectacled friend, as they peer at you and Regulus—in the living room—from behind a wall, not at all looking amiss. James wasn't quite sure how he ended up following Sirius’ steps. He’s been acting like this ever since he found out from Regulus, he definitely didn't beg him for information, that you had rejected another one of your parents’ proposals for an arranged marriage. And, apparently, this time you—alongside your younger sibling—finally decided to leave home with a friend's help. Hearing that alone sent Sirius into some kind of nostalgic mess. Which is why you’ve never left his mind the past few days.

Sirius knew you, you’d been one of the first few friends Regulus made at Hogwarts. The both of you share quite a few similarities, something that probably brings sense as to why you’re both so close. You both won't tolerate anything you deem nonsensical. You’re both just as stubborn. But you know how to use your wits to your own advantage. Which Sirius finds very admirable about you.

At first, he tried dismissing his feelings as just him being worried for his brother’s friend. After all, Regulus seems very fond of you out of all his friends. His little brother never misses to mention your name in a heartbeat. And Sirius, wanting to earn back his title of a good brother, began entertaining you as well when you came over. That’s until he found himself falling deeper into your labyrinth. Turns out, you shared more similarities with him. You come from a lineage of purebloods, that you despise because of the way they treat you. And you have a younger brother—who you’re trying to raise the best as you can. And that made Sirius dote on you even more. To the point his friends are beginning to notice.

“Curious? About my best friend's brother’s friend?” James scrunches his eyebrows together, repeating his words. “Geez, I think I’m gonna have a stroke.” He adds, but Sirius is too distracted to even hear him. Leaving James to stare at his hopeless looking friend. He’s never seen him this way before. Though, to be fair, you are giving his best friend a hard time just by being Regulus’ friend. Not to be taken as offensive, or anything, but he’s been acting kind of like a huge wall between you and Sirius. James finds it funny, though. Apparently, all it takes to cockblock Sirius is his own little brother.

A minute later, your two spectators see Regulus stand up, mutter something inaudible to you, before leaving. Sirius and James are forced to separate, pretending on doing their own things by the hallway. Regulus passes by them and eyes them, suspiciously, as James strangely inspects a nearby potted plant while Sirius fixes the broken head of a lamp. “You two can stop. We've already seen you.” The two friends exchange a look, before Regulus turns the hallway and heads to the kitchen.

Sirius gives James an incredulous look, before his friend gives him a slight push. “Go!” James eggs him on, grabbing him on the shoulders and turning him to the direction of the kitchen. “What? What do you want me to do?!” Sirius pushes himself back on his feet, but fails to do so when James starts pushing him forward. “Just ask Regulus to help you! You’re so obvious already!” Sirius turns around to face him, eyes wide. “I am not!” He looks at him as if James was the one being ridiculous for accusing him of acting like something that he is. Suddenly, you pop out behind them, from the living room.

“What’s all the commotion?” You startle James for a bit, but he finds his composure and convinces you with an excuse. Now, he’s dragging you back to the living room, with a promise to play chess. James, narrowing his eyes at his best friend, then mumbles. “Talk to him.” Before disappearing with you.

Sirius is then left to do one of the least things he wants to.

Talk to his brother about the way he feels.

“You like my friend?” Sirius feels like a proper dog with its tail tucked between its legs, as he feels Regulus’ scrutinizing gaze. Or is that just how he stares at people? Either way it was a little terrifying. He was trying to be vulnerable here, telling his little brother about how things started changing after you and him had that talk the last time. And suddenly the air seems rigid between him and Regulus.

Then a sigh, Sirius sees his brother grab the teapot and pour him a cup of tea. “Here, it should ease your nerves.” With his voice monotonous, he gives it to Sirius, who’s still a little bewildered. “Take it.” Regulus starts insisting, and eventually Sirius carefully grabs it from him, taking a big sip. And it did help, quite a bit actually, as his shoulders started to grow lighter.

“Green tea?”

“Yes. It's the only thing we have left.” Sirius hums, nodding his head as he takes another sip, before placing it back down on its coaster. “Anyway, I don't control how you feel. If you like them, I think it's best if you had this talk with them instead of me.” Regulus turns around, pouring himself a cup this time. Sirius follows him, pursing his lips, unsure. “Are you sure? That this is alright with you, I mean.” Familiar grey eyes stare at him once more, before Regulus speaks. “Like I said, I don't control the way you feel. Either way, I know you have good intentions. And they seem equally as interested in you” Regulus pauses. “I say, take the risk and just tell them. You deserve love too, Sirius.” With that said, Sirius feels much better than he did before.

He may not have been present for Regulus the last few years, but he’s glad that his brother’s giving him a chance to redeem himself.

“Sorry to interrupt your sibling time, but I just beat James in chess, and now he wants a rematch with an audience.” Your voice can be heard entering the kitchen, James trailing behind you like a defeated puppy. Sirius can’t help but smile. “If that's the case then,” He approaches you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, not missing the way you try to avoid his gaze. “I’m on your side.” Sirius mumbles, and he sees the corner of your lips tilt up.

“Great choice.” You finally meet his eyes, causing him to feel a little dazed. You’re even more charming up close. “As much as I want to team up with you as well. Seeing the circumstances, I guess it leaves me no choice.” You both hear Regulus pass by between the three of you, exiting the kitchen. “Wait, you’re teaming up with me?!” James trails behind him, giddy to have someone on his team.

“No, but I’ll be here to watch you lose again.” You both hear James’ loud gasp from the hallway.

“We shouldn’t let them wait much longer.” You say, Sirius trails his hand down to the small of you back, nodding in agreement. Before the both of you make your way back to the living room as well.

This day might’ve turned out much better than he anticipated.

marauders era masterlist ꩜ .ᐟ

[onefail-at-atime]

"Haymitch deserves so much better."

THIS.

This is exactly why I can not get behind the whole "tragic one and only love" bandwagon that so many have jumped on.

Yes, Haymitch and Lenore Dove's story is a tragic one. Yes, the fact that she died in his arms is absolutely horrific. Yes, they were absolutely in love. But regardless of whether you are a fan of Lenore Dove or not, it's cruel to subject Haymitch to a life of misery once the war was over. The fact that he is haunted more by Lenore Dove than his own mother and brother is also problematic. If you truly believe Haymitch should have spent the rest of his days drinking himself into oblivion while mourning the loss of his teenage girlfriend, then I'm sorry your view of grieving and emotional healing is so stunted. Haymitch is human. Yes, he is absolutely allowed to grieve and mourn, but it doesn't have to become his whole persona after the war, especially when Katniss and Peeta are there working to overcome their own trauma.

The epilogue broke me. Not just because of the emotional impact of Haymitch finally opening up to Katniss and Peets, but because it's also written as if Haymitch himself has given up. The war was done, the Games are over, and he's just waiting until he drinks himself to death so he can be reunited with the teenage girlfriend that he lost decades before.

The fact we're supposed to accept that he spent his final years living like this while Katniss and Peeta were healing and living their lives is depressing. Of course, not everyone is ever going to get a happy ending, but the epilogue paints the picture that he never even tried after a momentary lapse, where he helped add pages to the memory book. For someone who was so monumental in helping others survive and in his role in aiding the rebellion, Haymitch deserved better.

Because it's not healthy to spend your life chasing after ghosts.

There are stages of grief, and Haymitch never made it past depression. He fulfilled his promise to Lenore Dove and just ... gave up. Should he have magically been better after the war? Of course not. Katniss herself admits that she and Peeta still have bad days even decades after the war. But she also reveals that they have done what they needed to overcome the worst of it in order to make a new life for themselves.

If there is a 3rd book, I hope the next epilogue shows that Haymitch's epilogue was written at a time when he had hit rock bottom after the war. I hope it shows how Katniss and Peeta and everyone who ever cared for him worked to help Haymitch finally heal from and process his trauma. He deserves to share in the content happiness that Katniss projected in her own epilogue. A happiness where not everything was perfect, but one where they were doing where also moving forward rather than remain stuck eternally in the tragedy of their pasts.

Maybe it’s my age showing.

In 2007 when JK Terfling revealed that a certain greasy haired professor was in love with Harry’s mom forever and never moved on and shit. “Even after all this time?” “Always” I thought that shit was romantic. I was like 21 at the time.

But now? Reading Sunrise, seeing that Haymitch is essentially supposed to have the same fucking fate? That makes me sick to think about.

After everything Haymitch went through. After they finally overthrew panem and freed the districts, I’m supposed to sit here and go “yeah makes sense. He has to just keep drinking and wait around to die, pining over his dead girlfriend.”

I don’t care what Suzanne says. I don’t care what the shipping police say. (I have to assume they’re 21 or younger anyway) Haymitch deserves so much better. He deserves to spend the rest of his life in the arms of another. It might as well be Effie.

[genderdog]

ive been feeling a constant sense of dread since last week

[wilsons-journey]

Big shoutout to @ilona-art for letting me turn one of her lovely drawings into Papercraft ♥ Her Art is so nicely shaped, I had to give it a try and recreate it with papers. Really had a blast working on it - Thank you again for the permission! ;V;

The Original Image can be found here:

And some additional impressions from the Papercraft-Recreation:

[necrotic-nephilim]

what's fun about shipping Tim with Dick, Jason, or Damian is he has, at some point, hallucinated all of them to comfort himself. even when he doesn't like them or particularly get along with them, he has to imagine/hallucinate them just so he has the power to go on. Tim's concepts of the Robin mantle and what it should be is so fun, because he respects the others through the Robin mantle. Tim worships Dick because he was the first Robin. he wouldn't be Robin if Jason hadn't died in the mantle. and a lot of his frustration with Damian is he feels Damian isn't honoring the mantle correctly. when you ship Tim with the other Robins you can't divorce their identities as Robin from it because Tim will always see them as a Robin first and that's so fun and fucked up. like.

batman (1940) #456

Tim perceiving Dick as *Robin* cheering him on, not Nightwing, which is the version of Dick that Tim actually knows? that's just. wild of him. he will always view Dick as Robin first, his personal hero but also the original of the legacy. his love for Dick is shaped by that.

and then of course, even when he's hallucinating/imagining Jason cheering him on, it's *still* through the lense of being reminded how Jason failed? subconsciously believing that Jason got himself killed because of his actions, and that being a lesson for Tim to learn from? Jason isn't a person to Tim, he's a moral lesson about how to be Robin. any potential idolization he could have of Jason isn't because he loves Jason, it's because of the lessons Jason's death taught him.

and then, even though him hallucinating TIm is from the New-52, which makes characterization all kinds of questionable, i do think it makes sense for TIm to hallucinate/imagine Damian after Damian's death in an attempt to cope with it.

teen titans (2011) #18

to an extend, he sees Damian's death as in part his own fault. and even hating Damian, Tim needs the comfort from this to cope with Damian being gone. he's angry that Damian even was Robin, and has to learn something from Damian's death and how it impacts the Robin mantle, and teenage heroes as a whole. like, Tim can pretend he hates Damian all he wants, even getting taunted by the image of Damian, but there's still an underlying love to their relationship.

i think that's just the fun of shipping Tim with any of them. you will never divorce Tim's views of them from the Robin mantle and how fucking Unwell he is about anyone else who's been Robin before or after him, to the point he has to hallucinate them comforting him when he's at his lowest. it's always going to be a little unhealthy, a little toxic, and driven by Tim's relationship with being Robin as well. i need more Tim being weird about Robin in these ships.

[d8tl55c]

oh boy !! ! ! ! !!! ! thANK y0u all for the kind words on my last art posts. you all get it and i was/still am so happy about it

as promised, here's some close-ups of the comic for image quality's sake, and other screenshots i rescued from the community whiteboard (and something else)

first up another sketch of mystery gender-ambiguous being. (please send me more name ideas for them if you got one- i like to hear em! (reminder it's the side character that appeared for <10 seconds in AvM Ep. 30))

a few fav scenes

emotional support cwab

they weren't meant for this purpose exactly, but i do have countless "fluffy sticks" loose in my notes and homework sheets from the school years.

papery critter.

even when i wasn't confident in fur or feathers, they helped me practice posing and create some satisfying gradients/flowing poses. (im a sucker for good tail poses) (oh yay! i found a good pic...)

and finally, little sneak peak for you for reading so far ;3

i realized that whiteboardfox is pretty great for my working needs. simple and to the point and all. feels nice with the mouse and the tablet.

so i started hashing out a big project idea just to see if it holds up and

[

several hours later ...

]

oh

oh man

it's a little bigger than i expected

<next>

[ketzel]

ppl who do films or any film-related production in general; do y'all got any tips?

[the-words-we-sung]

Season 3 ending

So... It's been almost a week since the last episode, almost a week trying to wrap my head around the end of the show, trying to manage my feelings about it all.

It's hard to end up feeling the complete opposite of nearly everyone on my dash but I've come to terms with the fact that I didn't love the ending. I didn't love this last episode. (I shouldn't feel ashamed or weird for saying so but you guys loved it so much that I feel a bit like an outsider right now 😓)

I haven't been a fan of the show for as long as most of you, but it means so much to me. These characters carved a place in my heart and in my head, and they've made me happy for months now. They helped me get through some stuff, made me discover some amazing artists, meet even more amazing people through this fandom. And I loved the story. Even in its darkest, saddest parts, I loved it. I was invested.

I love Wilhelm and Simon, together and separately. They mean so much to me. And I loved season 1 and 2. It made me happy, and sad, and frustrated, and exalted. But overall, I trusted the show and I was not disappointed.

Season 3 was a lot. I liked the first 5 episodes. I can't say that I loved everything about them: I was not expecting things to get so hard for Simon, with no reprieve in sight. I was not worried about Wilmon being endgame (I know it was a big stress for the fandom but honestly I never doubted that they were endgame), but I was wondering how the show would go about tying all the knots it made (I should even say all the knots it added during this last season).

(Under a read more because it's a bit long and I don't want to bother those who don't wanna read more of my frustrated thoughts ^^')

And unfortunately the last episode was a huge let down for me. Yes, it's partly because nothing I was hoping for actually happened, but mostly, it's because the choices they made did not feel very satisfying to me: ⁕ Simon was barely there. We went from him being bullied online/offline non stop for 5 episodes to almost nothing. It makes 0 sense to me. ⁕ Kristina suddenly feeling better: she was having break down upon break down for an entire season, could barely look at her son or even just talk normally and all of a sudden she's back, smiling and agreeing to everything Wilhelm says? I'm sorry but I don't buy it? Where did this Kristina hid during the entire show? ⁕ Wilhelm deciding to not be king, talking for 3min to his parents about it, them agreeing and him running into the sunset with Simon. I'm sorry, what?? I love that they end up together of course, but it makes very little sense to me? It won't change any of the issues they had this season? They're still gonna be famous? And bullied online/offline? (Probably even more so now?). I'm not obviously saying that Wilhelm staying in line to become king was the only or the best solution, but I wanted more from this storyline. I wanted to believe it. And right now, what we got? It feels a bit cheap (and I feel bad for saying that because the ending was cute and romantic and all, but it felt too disconnected from the rest of the show for me ><)

And apart from these few points, the big issue I had with this episode was: The Angst. So that might be a me-problem, but it was too much for my poor little heart (I haven't rewatched the episode yet, and I'm not sure I'll be able to anytime soon ><). I spent like 40min of the episode with a huge knot in the stomach because the heartbreak between Simon and Wilhelm was too much to handle for me. I can see how it was beautifully made, that having lots of throwbacks to the previous seasons, the Wille song, all of that was great cinematography. But it was just too much for me. I got in the season spoiler-free but for this episode? During the lake scene I had to take a break and check online if they were actually endgame because it was starting to actually give me a stomachache. So yeah, this part might be me being too sensitive but I did not like that they made me see them fight for each other for 2 seasons and 5 episodes, but then just giving up for 40min before finally running back to each other during the last 10min. It was just too much sadness for me ><

So yeah, maybe my expectations were too high? But I feel sad, and kinda cheated. Too many things are left wide opened. Too many things make zero sense to me. And of course I'm happy we got our Wilmon endgame, but I'm less happy about how it happened.

It's a bit hard being on Tumblr right now and seeing everyone who thought it was the perfect episode >< And I don't want to "yuck anyone's yum" (as the saying goes), but I still wanna be able to share my thoughts! I probably won't write super angry/unhappy/complaining posts about the season/the finale, but I still wanna be able to chat about it. I did see some posts on my dash from people not being entirely satisfied with this ending so it's a bit comforting. And I hope we can share some nice headcanons, or just discussions about different plot points.

But yeah, I guess that's why I haven't really been active this week! Trying to get over the double heartbreak of the end of the show + being disappointed with the ending! I'm gonna come back though! I miss hanging out here, I just need to strengthen my heart a little bit more :p Gonna get back to writing about my thoughts episode by episode for this season (I can't promise I can rewatch the last one though 😖 It might take me a bit of time to get there). And I want to continue my song analysis of the show!! I'm not even done with season 2 yet, I have some work to do there ^^

So see you back here very soon 😘

[ruvviks]

fun art comparison for you

[luck-of-the-drawings]

when i was in highschool one o my biggest coping mechanisms was drawing all the kids i hated getting killed and eaten and killed. and well. time is a slowly ascending spiral. you will find patterns.(i work as a blackjack dealer. gamblers are FASCINATING

[cuteniaarts]

2 hour rough drawing of Ehuang, my precious Green Opal child who I don’t draw nearly enough <3

[gilfrespecter]

Listening to coinstar by the growlers and thinking about mel so hard I get nauseous

Ridiculous stream of conscious in the tags apologies but not really

[seaofreverie]

Wanted to start working on projects for my part-time school this weekend but instead all I have the energy to do is lay in bed and play mario kart or lay in bed and listen to music