#from thee queue

[bluewatersfairy]

homebody - l.b.

loosely inspired by homebody by kalin white (a/n: i've been wanting to use this song for a longgg time)

synopsis: requested by @bemybinarystar! two people meet by chance on an app that thrives on anonymity and begin an x-rated relationship with one another filled with late night video calls.

warnings: mature content, MINORS DNI!! depictions of sex work, mutual masturbation.

word count: 3.2k

•••

Melo grabbed his laptop and climbed on top of his bed, checking one last time that there were no tell-tale signs in view that would make him identifiable.  This had become a part of his routine and what was once him being cautious was now a natural habit.  He originally didn’t care, it never even crossed his mind, but she had told him he needed to, she didn’t want to know who he was.  That was weird for him to hear too, it reminded him of how different this relationship was.  If you could call it a relationship.

When he had first discovered her, he was doom scrolling on the type of site that was created for late-night rendezvous.  He’d convinced himself he was just curious, he’d laugh about it later and go back to the more traditional way of fulfilling his needs.  But then he saw her smile and he had to stop scrolling.  Her description was limited, her height, tag name, and that she was drawn to the anonymity of the site; tell me something good and maybe we can figure something out.

The only reason Melo had even caught her attention was because his profile looked like a cheap bot: 2 tall, 2 long, fire’n’ice, was all his profile said.  His request sat in her inbox for two days until he sent her another message, ‘you ever think about castles?  they got pretty ones by the lakes in lithuania.’  It was a bizarre opening, but it got him out of her requests and into her inbox.

They messaged back and forth for a full week before anything remotely sexual was discussed.  Melo liked that she wasn’t jumping at his every response and that it looked like she had a life too.  During that week, they hadn’t shared much about themselves, but he felt like she was investigating him, despite the very few questions she asked.  The first time he received the app notification that she’d sent him a picture, his palms started getting sweaty.  

He locked himself in his room, something that would become routine, laid back on his bed and opened her message thread.  It was a tasteful shot of her full thighs and ass peaky out of a red silk slip.  Her deep amber skin against the scarlet made him gulp.  It was so little, nothing he hadn’t seen before, but it pulled his interest and ignited his curiosity.  She had waited for him to see the message before she sent the follow up, ‘your turn…”

Melo had spent the next 10 minutes cleaning his floor and checking that nothing could be seen in the background from his messy room.  He spat in his palm and stroked his hard-on till it was raging and grown.  He held the base of his shaft with one hand and took a photo with the other before sending it through.  

That was two months ago and though neither of them had asked many personal questions, there was this unspoken bond between them.  She didn’t need him to say when he’d had a rough day, and he knew how she needed to be talked to.  He found himself thinking of her at the worst of times and turning to her when he needed a boost.  In return, he’d transfer undisclosed amounts of money to her account.  Again, this was something they hadn’t really talked about, it was an unspoken agreement.

Of course, she never expected him to be so generous.  

At first, she assumed that it was an attempt to impress her and keep her interested in him.  She had told him after maybe a week of exchanging racy pictures that she offered more, but for it to be fair to the other people she entertained, he had to pay a small fee that he felt reflected their time together.  The beauty of the site that she considered her secret life was that she got to choose her clients and could easily report and block people if they ever became aggressive or obsessive.  She’d always managed to attract men who exhibit something she’s attracted to, but she knew “fire’n’ice” was closer to her age and clearly in a high position, and that image was addictive to her.  

When he had first sent her a large sum out of the blue, she’d been 3 hours deep in official documents.  She imagined him in a similar position, probably in slacks and a white button up, trapped in his office thinking about taking her at his desk.  She’d quickly excused herself, citing lady problems, and clicked off to the employee bathroom.

Melo, who was standing in his kitchen heating up one of the several protein-based meals he had made weekly, received a message with 3 attachments.  She was spreading herself open for him, and had framed her tits in such a way, he just wanted to latch on.  He’d groaned loudly and abandoned his meal in favour of his room.  His cock was tight against his pants and the second he freed it, he felt the ache take over his body.  

He squeezed his eyes shut and pictured her, imagining how she posed.  He thrust into his fist and straggled words flew out of his mouth.  In the haze of the moment, he grabbed his phone and opened the camera. 

“Look at my fuckin’ cock, babygirl, look how hard it is for you.” He spat as he finished his sentence, needing more moisture so he could fuck his hand better.  “I bet you’d love to choke on my big fuckin’ dick, aye baby?  I’d fuck your face and finish all over your tits.”  

He paid no mind to what he was saying, he was just talking shit as he thrusted harder and faster into his hand.  His cum spurted all over his desk, some of it landing on his phone screen.  He swore and stopped the recording before bending over, his chest heaving.  He’d never thought to do something like that before.  She hadn’t even made a video for him, she’d only ever sent pictures.  What had she done to him?

The video worked in Lamelo’s favour in more ways than he could have possibly known.  She already had a growing soft spot for mr. fire’n’ice but that video sent him to the top of her list.  He was the first client she reached out to during the days and his sessions were always top priority for her.  It didn’t have much to do with the money, she was just drawn to him in every way a person can be to someone they’ve never met or even seen properly.  He even had her questioning if she should take a step back from her other clients and just entertain him.  

It was bad.  Unprofessional even.  But she couldn’t stop herself.

LaMelo was still checking his background when her call came in, popping up on his screen with her explicit profile icon highlighted with a red ring.  He pressed the green button and did one final adjustment to his laptop so all she could see was below his neck.  He always wore a black wife-beater so that his chest tattoo was mostly covered but so she could still get a good view of his toned torso and the ever growing bulge in his shorts.

“Hi pretty boy,” her ruby red lips pulled into a grin on his screen.  She looked like she was laying on her stomach, her tits pushed together under a slip of vibrant material.  

“‘Sup baby,” Melo swiped his tongue across his bottom lip, “you lookin’ edible.”

She giggled as she ran her hand down her neck before reaching somewhere off camera.  She was sitting up, he realised, before she brought something of a prop on screen.

“I was gonna say I found these today and thought of you,” she giggled again, “I know you’re much bigger, but you can’t tell me that’s not a close match.”  Melo smirked as he watched her twirl two rainbow lolly-cocks in the camera.  

“They not that girthy, you could still fit them in your mouth easy,” Melo felt his dick twitch as she rested her pouty lips on the tip of the lolly.

“Are you saying your dick won’t fit in my mouth?” she bit on her bottom lip and dragged her hand down her chest as she spoke.

“I’m sayin’ it won’t be easy.”  Melo’s hand moved to the bulge in his pants and he gently palmed it.

“I like a challenge,” she smiled, “I’ll make sure it fits baby, you know I’m a good girl for you.”

“Show me.” 

His voice was raspy, and his dick was hard.  She’d caught him at the perfect time and he knew she could tell just how desperate he was for her.  He didn’t care that she knew anymore.  Truthfully, he thought it showed how well they knew each other and how much he trusted her.  

“Of course baby,” she grinned before adjusting her laptop camera slightly.  

Melo watched closely as she spat on the tip of the lolly cock and used her tongue to glide it down.  Kitten licks and teasing kisses quickly turned into her pouty lips wrapped around the head.  The wet sounds her mouth made against the hard lolly did nothing but strengthen the pulse in Melo’s cock.  He swiped his tongue across his bottom lip before readjusting himself, watching as she pushed the lolly further into her mouth.  

“You’re such a good girl, baby,” Melo pushed out with his head leaning back.  He watched her through his eyelashes, picturing her wrapped around him.  His chest rose and fell at a steady pace and his skin flushed pink.  He was getting caught up in the thick of things, he barely processed her transitioning from the lolly cock to one of her dildos.

It was one they had purchased together.  It was a late night call, much like they were currently on, and she had wanted to find something a bit different for the two of them.  Her screen was shared with him as they scrolled through an adult website.  Every now and then Melo would point out one, whether he was being serious or joking was always up for interpretation.  

“I want something that’s like you,” she said sheepishly when Melo had asked why he was involved, “it’s like torture seeing such a pretty and big dick and not be able to ride it.”  

They’d found a dildo similar to his size and when it came in the mail a week later, Melo received a video of her putting it in her mouth, popping it out and pushing it between her tits.  She said she wouldn’t to anything else without him, but he was out of town and sharing a room so it would be a minute until he was going to be able to be alone with her.  It ended up being one of their better calls.  Melo could barely keep his eyes open by the end of it, he felt so fucked out and exhausted, you’d think she had actually been there to suck the soul out of him.  He’d jokingly texted her the next morning saying he had a sore wrist.  It wasn’t a complete joke though, many coaches commented on his shooting being off that day at practice. 

“Oh baby,” she moaned through the camera as she pulled the rubber cock out of her mouth, “touch yourself baby, show me how you stroke it.”

Melo was rock hard.  He hissed as he ran his hand up his thick shaft and circled his thumb over his throbbing head, spreading his leaked pre-cum so she could see it.  She spat on her dildo as he squirted lube on himself.  

“Follow my pace baby,” she instructed, “you know how much I love to push you.”

“I’ll do whatever you say baby,” Melo swallowed and began to stroke his dick as she jacked the dildo.  She switched between going fast and slow, bringing different sounds out of Melo as she encouraged him.  She moaned at every twitch of his dick and felt herself growing hotter and hotter with each stroke.

“Fuck,” she spat out as Melo had to let go of his cock, his head thrown back and his eyes squeezed shut, “you wanna cum don’t you baby?”

“I don’t wanna,” Melo groaned as he smacked his cock, “you just drive me crazy Ma.”  His eyes refocused on his screen to find she’d changed positions.

She was sitting now, her thighs spread so her pussy was on full display.  Melo cussed at the sight of it.  Even through the camera he could tell she was just as heated as he was.  She was visibly swollen and practically dripping.  She giggled as she slipped her fingers through her folds, a visible tremble running through her at the same time.

“Look how ready I am for you,” she moaned as she fingered her clit, “you’d stretch me out so good with that big cock.”

“I’d give you the fuck of your life,” Melo gripped his cock again, “have yo ass screamin’.”

She picked up the dildo from her side and rubbed the tip against her entrance, “tell me baby,” she hummed, “tell me how you’d do me.”

“I’d fuck you in so many ways,” he started to jerk his cock again.  “God, I’d fuck you into your mattress baby, giving you the deepest strokes of your life.  You’ve never had a dick like this.”

“No I haven’t,” she whined, pushing the dildo inside her, “you’d have to go slow with me, I wanna make sure I feel every inch of you.”  she let out a gasp of a pet name, her free hand gripping on to her tit.

“God just the sight of your cock makes me feel crazy,” her hips were moving against her hand, pushing the rubber cock in and out, trying desperately to match Melo’s pace.  If he could function enough to think of anything at that moment, he’d appreciate her commitment to making it feel like they were together, fucking.  But his brain wasn’t working anymore.  Everything that came to mind was nothing shy of filth. 

“It’s all yours baby, and you’d look so fucking good bouncing on top of it.”

She moaned at his words, her tits bouncing as she fucked herself harder.  

“This big fucking dick is all yours, whenever you want it, I don’t care where, it’s yours.”

His room filled with a mix of her moans, his heavy breathing and the sound of his hand beating his cock, slapping with how fast he was jerking.

“Oh and this pussy is all yours daddy,” she moaned loudly, “I’m all yours baby.  You can put that pretty dick whereever you want and use me for whatever you need.  I just need you all over me daddy, your big hands wrapped in my hair, around my throat.”

“I’ll slut you out baby,” Melo groaned as he chased her words, “I’ll make you cum so much the whole world gon’ hear.”  

“I’m gonna cum,” she all but screamed, “keep talking, tell me baby, I want to hear you.”

“I’ll fuck you from behind in the mirror, baby.  Smack yo’ ass and pull your hair and make you look me in the eye while you cum all over my big dick.”  Melo repressed a loud moan and swallowed hard.  “We gon’ fuck all night, baby, the second you cum, I’m sticking it right back in there.  I’ll make it so you won’t be able to walk in the morning.”

Melo watched her body react to his words and struggled to process the sight. Her chest was heaving, fucking the dildo in and out of her hole with her hand tight on her clit.  She swore over and over again until her words were nothing but moans and Melo saw everything reach it’s peak.  She pulled the dildo out of her and did everything she could to stop her thighs from clamping shut.

“Holy fuck,” she gasped with her head thrown back and her hands jammed between her thighs.  She collasped against whatever was behind her and Melo watched her spread herself open and squirt.  “Oh baby, I’m cumming so fucking hard.”

Melo just about double over, letting out the loudest moans and groans he’d ever made as his load spurted out of his tip.  He massaged his balls and watched his seed cover his lower stomach and parts of his laptop.

“Fuck,” he sighed as he leaned back and let his dick stand to its own want.  

For a minute, the two of them didn’t move, just panting heavily staring at one another.  Occasionally, he’d stroke his shaft and rub his balls at the same time to see if he had anything left.  She was the first one to move, laying back down to the position she’d been in when the call started.

“Every time I think we’ve reached our peak, you go and do the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen,” she giggled as she put one of her fingers to her lips.

“Tell me how that pussy tastes babe,” he said, his voice audibly strained.  She smirked and put her fingers in her mouth, sucking them off.

“It tastes sweet and creamy,” she let her wet fingers drag down her naked torso to her nipples.

“You’re a fuckin’ problem,” Melo grinned and shook his head, reaching for the rag he washed for this call.

“I’m a problem?” she giggled, pointing to herself, “you’re the one who’s got me thinking of throwing all the policies out the window.”

“Policies?” Melo asked, suddenly brought out of his post-nut daze.  “What are you tryna say?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted with a shrug, “but don’t you feel it too?  Don’t you want to see my face?  Know my name?”

“I want all of the above, baby,” Melo pulled his laptop closer to him.  “Are you saying there’s more we could do?”

“I’m just thinking out loud here,” she hesitated, “you’re the first person I feel like I’d be safe sharing my secrets with.”  What was she saying?

It was a big confession, she wants to elevate things.  Melo couldn’t decide if it was his money or him but he really didn’t care.  He wanted to have her name and he wanted her to know his name.  But it’s unique, and she’d know exactly who he was if he said it.

Fuck it.

“LaMelo,” he rushed to say, spitting it out before he could think twice.  “I’m LaMelo.”

She smiled wide and he watched as she reached out to her laptop screen and pushed it back slightly.

“I’m Y/N,” she giggled.

LaMelo repeated her name, letting it pass through his lips to see how it’d feel saying it.

“So Y/N,” Melo smiled as he pushed his laptop screen a bit too, showing more of him, “if I offered to fly you out, would you say no?”

“Oh baby,” she smirked, “I’d be there in a heartbeat.  I want all that dick in real life.”

“Aight, bet,” Melo picked up his phone from beside him, “you give me a date and I’ll work out all the rest.”

[itsawritblr]

Me editing.

[alecvolturi]

I think it's hilarious that it only took Aro 50 years to break his own law, which is literally no time for a vampire. Immortal children were outlawed in 750A.D and then he turned Jane and Alec (canonically 12/13 years old) in 800A.D. Might as well have announced the law change in the morning and broken it by noon.

[continuallycowardlycod]

Specific au time: Two characters that never meet in canon actually regularly went to the same cafe/were active and chatted on the same forums/ got the same pretty empty bus or train at the end of each day etc and got to know eachother really well but never exchanged numbers or names thinking that the other will always be there.

Then Canon Plot happens. And one is not there anymore and the other never finds out that they know exactly how their freind died - in a distant freind of a freind of a freind's death sort of way.

[dreadbornesaint-moved]

General (1/2)

[sunnieray]

Bait

(or)

Your biggest regret just completed a patient intake form.

4.7k words

Pairing: Johnny MacTavish x f!Cybernetics Specialist!Reader, slight mention of ghoap(you'll have to hold a magnifying glass to it i fear)

Tags: non/dub con, dry humping, sci-fi au where advanced bodily augmentations are a thing, post-soap's headshot, AFAB reader, sci-fi terminology

Chapters: 1: Command | 2 | ?

You flip through the patient’s file for the third time, drawing curious stares from the 2 doctors stealing lollipops from the kiddie bowl. The yellowed, flickering lights cast a depressing hue over the main office. The murmur of the tail-end of the mid-day rush recedes from your periphery. What the hell… 

“Something weird about this… John MacTavish?” Startled by the voice too close to your ear, you press the clipboard to your chest and whip around. “Woah. Jumpy. I just wanted to see what was holdin’ you up. Your 2 o’ clock is ready to see you.” You level the new receptionist, the clinic director’s nephew, with a silencing look.

Unaffected or perhaps powered by the ignorance of youth and nepotism, he continues. “Special, then? He’s got some pretty unique Addendums. I didn’t know Mensa made civilian-grade, well, anything.” His voice lightens into a whisper. “Also, he doesn’t seem very… present by the smell of him. It must’ve cost him an arm and a leg just to get the base cerebral." He looks at you with a gossipy smile. You lick your fingers and flip through the papers again. 

His hair’s grown out. Dark locks frame darker lashes and light eyes. You take in his lopsided, toothy smile and recognize it as one that’s surely hurting his cheeks to fake. At least he looks healthy. Your lips twitch up before you internally reprimand yourself. Your focus returns to the conversation at hand. “Mensa took a military contract after Amend bought them out years ago. They used to specialize in cosmetic and somatic addendums. Also, please remember to keep comments on the patients’ financial situations to a minimum. If any of them hear you it could discourage them from seeking the aid they need.” You glower at the receptionist. Your flat tone kills the topic. The other doctors shift uncomfortably in their seats.

“Is Mr. MacTavish still in the waiting room?” You say it as more of a statement than a question.

“Yes.” 

He grunts when you shove the clipboard into him. “There’s plenty of servicing clinics licensed to work with Amend’s subsidiaries. Which I should remind you, we are not. He can find somewhere else easily.” You brush past the stunned man who smells faintly of flowers and head to your office. Your measured steps quicken into an almost jog, lab coat whipping behind you. You burst through your office and quickly lock your door. 

“What the hell. What the hell. What thee hell.” you whisper-scream. You wrack your brain for any logical reason why your (very well kept, thank you very much!) past decided to schedule a walk-in. The only words you two shared were in one-sided cognition tests. He wasn’t even conscious! He’d purposely mislabeled his mods to suit the clinic's requirements. The excuse you gave to pawn him off was flimsy at best. It was an open secret that you’d work on any Amend product for the right price. It’s what keeps the clinic’s lights on. Your frantic eyes catch on the various obsolete models of metal limbs that hang from the ceiling frame. Just do your job. A voice that’s not yours rattles through your head. As much as you hate the one who said it, they’re right. You’ve got to fit a few limbs to their owners before you can afford to take a break. The mechanical equipment needs to be maintenanced. Next, you need to call around for a decommissioned rotator so Mrs. Egwin can bend down again. Then, you’ve gotta organize a queue of people that gets longer and longer as augmentations advance. The wall monitors displaying cybernetic diagrams hum in your ears. Inhaling the lingering scent of metal polish and rubbing alcohol, your mind settles.

 Fuck this job.

-----

You finish the day out anyways. 

Your body aches as you lock down the clinic. You don’t imagine the director would care if you were to take a quick nap on your treatment table. Today involved a lot more energy than usual. Manual fixes and pre-chip models are a lethal combination. You were able to relax a bit when the receptionist told you MacTavish left without a fuss, though. It doesn’t sit well that he’s found his way to you. If your old boss is looking to fuck with your career for a third time you’ll actually kill him.

A familiar rhythmic metallic tapping hits your ears as you near your lightless office. The maintenance program you were running on the equipment must’ve hit a snag! For the second time that day, you find yourself rushing into your office, it’s door falling shut with a soft click. If you were a bit more focused, you might’ve remembered that the program finished perfectly just an hour ago. You might’ve smelt the lingering scent of a perfume you hadn’t worn in ages. You might’ve paid more heed to the nostalgic melody rumbling just low enough to make your hair stand on end. Instead, you see a pod speaker on the floor and the enshadowed form of the man you know everything and nothing about.

Your pulse spikes but you find yourself rooted in place. Instead of running, you manage to evenly say, “Mr. MacTavish.” The humming stops.

“Mrs. MacTavish.” he replies. You see his muscles shift under his black, long-sleeved shirt as he bends to cut the noise. His huge forearms rest on his thighs, the speaker cradled in his rough hands. He levels you with an expectant look. 

Your lips purse together, cheeks heating at the title. “Johnny, then.” you correct yourself. His body shifts up in the chair, coming to attention.

“Doctor.” As your eyes adjust, you can make out that too-wide smile and light eyes dancing with desperation and unadulterated glee. How could you let yourself think that was fake.

“Johnny, I am… gladdened to see that you are in good health.” you think you see him shiver. You continue after a beat. “It is my hope that you’ll accept our earlier reject–”

A sharp sound of amusement cuts you off, making you jump. “You cannae talk like a person when you’re nervous. Just like I thought.” His eyes drag up your body and settle on your warm face.

You take a step back and his face goes hard. “I wouldn’t do tha’.” The pod speaker in his hands starts to feel a lot more menacing.

You raise a hand. “Calm down, Johnny. I’m just getting a seat. You took mine.” Keeping your voice soft, you point to the corner to the right of the door.

“Ah.” He visibly relaxes, an easy smile gracing the sharp angles of his face. “Looks like I cut the cameras for nothin’, then.” At that, you’re officially the second-most scared you’ve been in your life.

You pull the seat over, leaving a reasonable distance between you two. Not reasonable enough, unfortunately. When you sit, his steel-toed boot hooks around the chair leg and slowly drags you closer and closer. The squeaking of aged metal stops as your knees touch the edge of his seat. Toned thighs spread to accommodate the seat’s new spot between his legs. They're long enough to cage you and the chair between them. He moves with a grace you thought you’d never get to see. His breath is slightly unsteady as he studies your face. You lean back, partially at the intensity of his stare but mostly because the flowery scent of the perfume you used to wear is wafting off of him in heavy, saccharine waves.

You clear your throat. “Like I was saying, I’m sure the receptionist told you we specialize in discontinued civilian cybernetics. A military-grade Addendum should be handled at an Amend-partnered practice. They’ll have the proper facilities to avoid any unfortunate accidents or botched jobs. I’m not sure you need me, specifically. I’d be happy to recommend some places I trust.” You suggest, powering through even when his head falls into his hands and he begins to mutter harshly under his breath. “I’m sorry but there’s little I can do beyond that–” 

“Don’ lie to me.”

“I’m not–” Your voice is strained.. 

“I know you are.” His face whips up to look at you and he presses his index into your sternum. “You need to take responsibility for what you did to me.” His voice wavers with exhaustion through clenched teeth. All at once you notice the bags under his eyes and stress rings in his irises. When you’ve seen someone at their worst, any improvement makes them look perfect.

“‘Did to you?’ You mean resurrect you from the dead?” you say with unrestrained derision. “If anyone owes you anything, it’s the men that signed off on the procedure. I don’t even work for them anymore. If I touch one line of code, the security system will brick the entire augmentation. You’d die for good.” Exasperation laces your tone by the end and you place a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“I don’t have the tools or the license to take responsibility for anything having to do with Amend or you. I don’t understand why you’ve come after me.” You force the anger to leave your voice.

He stands abruptly, desk chair clattering to the floor. His hand shoves the long hair covering the left side of his head back, the other tearing at the false skin there. The silicone peels back, revealing the unassuming metallic face of the most complex augmentation in the western hemisphere. And you'd be the first to know. 

“Because you’re the one who put this fuckin’ thing in my head!” His booming voice silences any retort. Regret flashes over his visage and he quickly lowers his volume to a whisper. “I can’t sleep, I-I can’t think. Only thing that works is my body, but I’m too exhausted to put it to any good use. Please, I need someone that knows what the hell they’re doing. These doctors– they just play in my head. The first few ‘tweaks’ were fine. They said they were necessary and I believed them. But the more they ‘fixed’ the worse I got. I ended up going back one more time, my old CO took me and spoke to the doctors for me. After that, I was walking on clouds, until I wasn't. The pain came back worse, and the doctor was more interested in how I was feeling than how she could help me. ” He grips your shoulders and sinks to his knees. “I can feel them fucking up your good work. I’ve already gone to everyone I could, you’re the only one that can fix this.”

Your chest goes tight at the misery in his voice but satisfaction blooms with it because he’s right. You’re the only one on this planet that can put him back together. The pride that got you blacklisted is revived with a vengeance. “Ok. I’ll do it.” Your hand delicately brushes his dark strands away to get a closer look. Your thumb presses into the model number, MX - 00. You feel confident enough in your decision. Relief washes over his features and he leans in. You think he’s going for a kiss… 

Until he buries his nose in the crook of your neck and takes a deep whiff. 

Immediately, his weight sinks into you, tension fleeing his muscles. “What are you–” you start before you feel the familiar vibrations of your childhood lullaby. Ohhhh. Now how do I explain this…

“When you hear my voice, how exactly do you feel?” his pulse quickens as you speak.

“Right. I feel right.” he says absently. His lips brush the fluttering vein of your neck. A warmth sparks between your legs. Focus! Do your job!

“Come.” you say, quickly extricating yourself from his hold.” Let's get you on the table.”

-----

 

You adjust him so he lies flat on the treatment table. Your foot presses into a gap in the chair’s platform. A gust of cool air brushes over your feet as a metal rack rises from the temperature-controlled, hidden compartment in the floor. An assortment of sleek tools hang from the bars. It’s a mix of what you were able to sneak from Amend before your termination and a few lucky finds from shiftier channels.  

“I knew you were the lying type.” He chuckles. You shift to hooking him up to the monitors.

“You’ll feel a slight sting.” you say as you fold his ear up to plug the port hidden behind it.

His body jolts, shaking the exam table as you do your best to hold him steady. A fresh layer of sweat gleams in the blue light as his skin pales. When the episode passes his chest heaves.

“You call that shit slight? The fuck happened ‘do no harm’?” he says through gritted teeth.

“I had to send the connection through your natural brain so it wouldn’t trip the firewall.”

“That sounds.. easy to fuck up.”

“It is.” You hope he misses the exhilaration in your voice. “One wrong move and your grey matter would be goo. It’s a good thing I’ve spent hundreds of days learning all about yours, specifically.”

Johnny smiles up at you with a level of fondness you struggle to categorize. It’s strange and a bit foolish in hindsight. In all the time you spent rebuilding his psyche, you didn’t consider that he’d remember you anymore than one would a dream. You try not to think about why you’re glad he did, opting to look at the flashing monitors behind you.

You watch the lines of code run down the screens, most of it’s familiar. There are some irrelevant changes sprinkled throughout. Nothing raises your alarm bells until you reach the section of code that controls the more nebulous parts of the mind. An old anger flashes up your gut. What did they do to your baby? Months of work hacked apart with juvenile precision. It looks more like a group brainstorm than the polished tapestry you left it as. Notes between the various editors, most are names you recognize but there are some you don’t, suggesting an assortment of modifications. “Keep deleting. Find the bare minimum he can function with.” The most recent reads. It’s dated three months ago. Your brows pinch. 

There’s a lot wrong with this. Enough that you’re sure you’ll need a good month to clean it all up. It’ll take even longer when you add in your shifts at the clinic. As ready as you were to help, you’re not sure you can handle being around him that long. Johnny “Soap” MacTavish may be your greatest achievement but he also embodies everything negative that you’ve tried to tamp down. 

“I’ll be able to get you feeling better by the end of the night. After that, I ask that you leave me be.” If they’ve followed the treatment plan you wrote up, he’s overdue for another check-in with Amend. The more delicate work will have to go unfinished. With a build as rare as his, too many changes will alert the next tampering hand of your interference. 

 You right your toppled seat and roll it over to your desk. “I’m sure you know the drill. Just remember to keep answering my questions as best you can.” Your fingers fly as you begin to restore your magnum opus.

“So, I have a vague idea, but I’d like to hear from you how you think you’ve managed this long.” Your mind falls into a familiar space. Hundreds of hours were spent just like this, except he was a husk and you were a promising new face in your field. 

“Don’ think that's a question, pretty.” His voice carries a humor that’s cowed by his earlier pain. 

“Adapt to the implication, Johnny. I worked very hard to make sure you could.” You click your tongue as you come across a particularly egregious function.

“It helps.. when I use the gifts you left me.” At least he can still follow instructions.

“You mean the lullaby and the perfume.” you see him nod the corner of your eye. “Words, Johnny.” 

 He sucks in a harsh breath. “Yeah. At first I only knew that I liked the smell of one of the nurses.” Your typing slows but regains its speed soon after. 

“Is that right...” you’d beaten yourself up for losing the last of your custom scent. It was disgustingly time consuming to make. Seems it wasn’t lost at all.

“She was helping me with physical therapy. Real nice ass, that one.” You hear the teasing smile in his voice. “I spent the night at her’s after I was discharged and snagged the bottle. When I met up with her again it just wasn’t the same.” 

“From there,

“That must’ve taken a while.”

“Wasn’t doing it alone. A friend helped me.” You don’t miss the slight hesitation before he says friend. Deep brown eyes and a hulking form flash in your mind. You can barely imagine that behemoth holding an egg, let alone mixing scent notes. You smile inwardly.

“What about the lullaby?”

“When I woke up, I already knew it. Felt more like myself when I hummed it.” You hear him shift and the heat of his gaze warms the back of your head. “When you do it, though, I feel human again.” Your typing falters as a tingle of shame squirms in your gut. 

-----

By the time you’ve finished, the evening has bled well into the night. You pivoted to less personal questions after the intensity grew too much to bear. Hours of innocuous queries didn’t stop Johnny from bringing the focus right back to your effect on him.

“I’m going to run it with my edits now. Ready for another sting?” you rasp, already losing your voice, eyes glued to the monitor. Your palms have gone clammy and your posture has caved in a way that warrants scolding.

“Whatever happened to ‘do no harm’?” he grumbles before giving you the go-ahead. You initiate the altered program. You’ll have to get him a lollypop. Sitting for hours in stasis is one thing, being fully conscious is another. 

Johnny?” You turn to see his body tensing off the table as it works to accommodate your modifications. The initial jailbreak should’ve been the worst of it but it seems that few things are going to plan today. 

You’re at his side in a flash moving around the platform to see both him and the program’s progress. Veins bulge from his neck and forehead as he releases a strangled exhale. His hand shoots up to rip out the cord connecting him to the equipment and it takes both of your’s latching to his wrist to stop it. 

“If you need something to hold onto, use me! But don’t you dare touch that cord!” At that, his other hand wraps around your back with such force that it sends you both to the tiled floor. You do your best to angle the fall and manage to keep him connected at your hip’s expense. You let out a moan of pain as it bears the brunt of both your impacts.

As Johnny’s body writhes in your arms, you somehow manage to adjust so that he’s cradled to you. Your left arm wraps supportively around his upper back as your bent legs act as a cushion for his lower torso. Your right hand is clamped in his and you swear you feel your bones creak. His left fists the back of your coat, ripping a seam.

Your gaze flicks back to the monitors. Interrupting the run now would cause him more harm. You grimace as you watch the completion meter slowly tick up in percentage. Johnny’s huffs and groans of pain overlay the mechanical hum of the room.

Without thinking, you angle his head into the crook of your neck and begin to sing the full lullaby. Just as you knew it would, his body sags into yours once more, shaking with the remnants of it’s earlier pain. The grip on your hand loosens but doesn’t pull away completely. You shiver as his other palm slides up the line of your spine and rests on the back of your neck, index pressing into the vein.

His eyes remain closed and his breathing is haggard by the time the program completes. His pained expression slowly dissolves as you finish out the song.

“It would seem I’m out of practice.” Your throat aches with overuse. The man snorts at that and then coughs. “If it weren’t for your reaction to the lullaby, the update couldn’t have pushed through without ample damage.”

His eyes peek open. They struggle to regain focus as they land on you.

“You were made to save me.” His quiet words settle on your skin and they feel wrong. He looks at you, again, in that way that makes you nervous of his expectations. 

“No, Johnny, I Pavlov-ed you.” you say flatly, hoping to shake off the feeling. “That tune was one I hummed while I worked on you. I had to sit by your bedside for weeks on end, singing it helped me keep my own company. Your body associates your rise to consciousness with not me, but the consistent elements you could smell and hear. Like that nurse–”

“Don’ care. If I'm a dog, least I’ve got a master that knows what she’s doin.”

A cheeky grin stretches across his face, boyish red starting to beat away the pallor of his cheeks. You groan, the exhale tinged with a mix of relief at his recovery and exasperation at his stubbornness. "I already have a dog, and she doesn’t need a playmate.” You draw back but don’t make it very far.

The hand he’d placed at your nape turns to hot iron as it holds you in place, thick index burning into your rising pulse. His playful eyes darken with heady intensity. A look so striking it sends a violent flinch wracking through your body, settling in your core. Even if you could perfect his mind in one night, he wouldn’t leave you be. He’d keep coming back until you forgot what it was like to be without him. “Then make me your man. I can take care of ya. You’d never want for anything.” his voice goes lower and lower until it settles at a panting rumble  “I’d make you so happy.”

Your arms wobble, unsettled by the sudden change in him. “Johnny, you’ve done very well, today. Why don’t you–” He uses your lapse to slam your lips together, your teeth clack painfully against his mouth. His grip on your nape turns bruising as he switches your positions, flipping you both around until his arms could lock your body to his. One secures your arms to your sides while the other slinks around your head to press a rough finger into your mouth, pushing it open. You clamp down hoping to break more than skin, your teeth meet the unforgiving sting of metal instead. They grind painfully and uselessly against his synthetic thumb. He coos into your lips when you let out a pathetic whimper, forcing it deeper until saliva pools and spills from the side of your mouth. He chuckles running tongue along your clips, catching any spit, before unceremoniously shoving it back down your throat. Your thighs squeeze together as your tongues marry, wet and embarrassingly loud. Flashes of hot and cold surge though your core and make you squirm. Your vision blurs as he sucks and nips at your swollen lips. 

Above you, Soap grunts and shifts his hips. You find yourself moaning absently at the feel of his hard length through both your jeans’. You’re nearly consumed by him. The feel of his tongue fucking your mouth removes all your needs save for the most carnal. Then adjusts himself so he’s slotted between the curves of your ass. That first hard grind against you tears a highpitched mewl from you that mingles with the string of needy, wanton pleas falling from his mouth. His hips start to rut into your backside, the force of them knocks you out of your kiss fueled stupor. Your hips shoot off his lap, running from the sudden, direct assault on your overly sensitive clit. A long whine morphs into a frustrated growl as he chases the exquisite heat of your clothed cunt. All the air runs from your lungs as he shifts his full weight onto your back, trapping your ass between his pelvis and the hard floor. He finally breaks the kiss, removing his fingers from your mouth. Not that it matters. You can’t formulate a sentence let alone a word. The pressure on your body lightens as he braces on his knees. His hands travel up your sides possessively, tracing the backs of your arms, then your hands, and finally lacing their fingers with yours. 

“Don’ run, pretty. Don’ run from me.” He says in a whimpering tone, it’s the only warning you get before he resumes rolling his hips into you. His cock catches at a point that makes you gasp, causing him to focus his efforts as his hips pick up their frenzied pace. His sweat-slicked forehead nuzzles into the crook of your neck, stubbleed chin dragging over your skin. You feel the heat of his panting breath hit your ear. The force of each thrust pushes you into the ground and leaves you aching for more. More friction. More of him. You let out a frustrated and defeated noise. You barely recognize your own voice. Fuck it. You find yourself pushing into him before you can think better of it. The sensation of relief floods your body as you move in tandem with him. The groans that spill from his lips are threaded with pure joy and exhilaration at the small victory. Your slick has surely coated the outside of your jeans. The pressure in your gut builds as breathlessness overtakes you. Tears well in your eyes, pleasure reaching a fever pitch. They squeeze shut as bliss washes over you in waves. Your stock-still body carried through the feeling by Johnny’s uncompromising pace. When the pleasure turns to overstimulation you whimper and hazard a hazy glance at Johnny. At some point, he must’ve moved back to watch you lose your mind and any semblance of restraint along with it. Lust-darkened eyes immediately burn onto yours. And the fucker cums with your name on his lips. 

As you come down from your high, a cool wave spears through your veins. All the feelings that lust fogged sink into your bones with grim reality. The sting of bruises forming on your arms, hips, hands, and the base of your neck. The uncomfortable chafe of wet denim against the soft skin of your inner thighs. And most pressingly, embarrassingly, humiliatingly, the unerring pulse of dissatisfaction. A craving for everything he had coupled with the understanding that he’d give you exactly that. 

Without question. 

He smiles and runs his tongue across his teeth. 

“Johnny,” You say, voice hoarse but steady. His eyes flutter at the sound of his name. “You’ve done very well, today.”

He blinks. “Ah well,” His hands release yours and move to your waistband. “I do try my best.” 

Your hands clench into fists. “Take a rest.” You say through your teeth, anger spiking. His eyes sag with exhaustion. 

“...what’s…goin’...?” is all he manages before his body tips to the side and hits the floor, fast asleep. At least he had the decency not to land on you. You push up to a seated position and crawl over to the treatment table, leaning into it. The cool feeling of the metal on your forehead helps settle your thoughts. After a few steadying breaths you look over at the crumpled form of John MacTavish, resisting the urge to kick him in the ribs for sleeping so soundly. 

The clinic will open again in a few hours and the warm embrace of sleep won’t find you until you can deal with him. It was a hunch, but it looks like he still follows your commands like he did when he was in stasis. You run a hand down your face and wince at the blooming bruise on your cheekbone. The director’ll be mad at you for calling out on such short notice but you’ll have to risk it. As you close your eyes and try to decipher your next move, a familiar thought crosses your mind.

Fuck this job.

[yeonmuse]

ᥫ᭡ f!reader x yang jungwon ── 𝒢enre. Uni au. fluff, non idol enha. feats. ot7 [reqs are open] ᝰ.ᐟ 𝓁ibrary 🎧

authors 𝓃𝑜𝓉𝑒𝓈 I this series has officially met its end everyone, though I’m thinking about making a special christmas chapter im not 100% I will be doing so. Considering I have all of the other members series to start writing. Within ending this i’d like it to be known that every member will be receiving a mini series that all tie in with one another, beginning with this series. This is part of admins Enhypen university Series

ᦓynopsis Jungwon is a film major that finds honestly complete captivated by an antisocial girl with a love for the stars and a passion for music

TAGLIST CLOSED FOR THIS SERIES

The girl with the headphones | THE FINAL CHAPTER

Tonight was the night that Jungwon and the film club had been working so hard on, the night had finally come to premier the film they had all been working so hard to pull together. The first viewing would be at heartstrings, with only a selective few from campus. Yn was more excited than anyone, Jungwon hadn’t told her much about the film other than a few minor details when the two began working on it together so she was over the moon to finally see what ideas had been plaguing his mind.

The two of them hadn’t really spoken much since last night, the night they shared their first kiss. Though she knew it was because he was most likely far too busy trying to perfect things at heartstrings for tonight’s film viewing. When It came to his craft Jungwon was completely serious about it, she’d always found herself admiring him or staring at him at the time even the two were working on the project together. Something about the way his expressions changed so vividly when he was focused, made it impossible to keep her eyes off of him.

A knock at the door forced the girl out of her thoughts of her boyfriend as she brushed her teeth. Before she herself could even make it to the door her roommate had already opened it.

“Oh Nessa! When did you get back from your parents?” Chaewon slips inside as if it were her own dorm, something she had done time and time again and both yn and nessa had grown used to it.

“I got back yesterday, the snow storm last night made it completely hell to get back.”

“Are you coming to Jungwons premiere tonight?”

“I wasn’t going to at first but I feel like I’ve missed so much that I need to be there to not miss anything else, besides I need to meet this new boyfriend.”

“You haven’t met Jungwon yet??”

“Nope she hasn’t let him come over here once because she was too afraid i’d scare him away.” Nessa sighs dramatically and holds her chest as if she had just been struck in the heart.

“That’s not true, he always asked to walk me back to the dorm but it’s been snowing so much I don’t want him out in the cold for too long.”

“Oh she’s whipped.”

“She’s been daydreaming about him ever since I got back.”

“That kiss must have done a number on you or something, he’s all you can think about now.”

“Okay okay enough you two, are we going to go shopping tonight or not, or will you both stand here all day talking about my love affairs?”

“Who says we can’t do both?” Nessa shrugs as yn opens the door and both she and Chaewon follow each other out.

“Oh I almost forgot we’re waiting on one more person.” Chaewon pulls her phone from her pocket as the three of them step out into the main hall of the girls dormitory.

“I thought Sunoo was helping the guys with preparations today?”

“He is, it’s not Sunoo that’s joining us.” As Chaewon slips her phone back into her pocket, as if on queue her name is called causing the three of them to whip their heads around to the hallway.

“Chae Chae you did not.”

“Isn’t that the girl from the theater department”

“Long story short, Heeseung has a thing for her and he’s been trying to approach her for months but fails every time.”

“Heeseung? As in Lee Heseung? As in thee Lee Heeseung, that's always flirting?”

“Yup, I invited her to the premier tonight.”

“Chaewon Heeseung might actually kill you this time.”

“He tried to set me up with an obviously straight woman, this isn’t the worst I could do.” As Sakoia finally made it over to the three of them, it was obvious to the three of them why Heeseung had taken a liking to her. Not only could she sing, and act but she was breathtakingly beautiful.

“Were you guys waiting on me all this time? Show preparations ran a little later than usual today.”

“Nope you’re actually just in time. Koia, this is yn and that’s her roommate Nessa.”

“Nice to meet you both, Chaewon talked about you both nonstop yesterday.”

“I didn't know you were into theater Chae.”

“Oh she’s not, the only reason she was there was because the fashion department and theater department are working together for the upcoming show.”

“I’ve never been more stressed out about fashion in my life, theater majors are no joke.” The three of them laugh at Chaewons obvious fatigue having to deal with so many thoughts and ideas having been thrown at her yesterday.

“Should we get going now? We only have 5 hours until the premier and Chaewon takes the longest time picking out outfits.”

“Mm yeah let’s go, or else we’d end up missing the movie picking out an outfit for just Chae alone.”

While the girls had been out and about, shopping and pampering themselves for tonight’s premier Jungwon had been working the guys like it was their 9 to 5.

“How come Taehyun gets off so easily without doing anything?” Jake complains, as he and the others continue making decorations for the tabletops.

“Um maybe because Taehyun owns the place and he’s already helped enough by letting Jungwon premier hops film here and making the menu for tonight’s show.” Taehyun retorts to his complaining in a mock whiney voice as he places a stack of menus onto the diner counter for them to take.

“Fair enough.”

“Where is Jungwon anyways?”

“He went off into the back room to make sure the film was working properly.”

“Film? What is this in the 1800s? Why didn’t he just make it a drive or something?”

“He wanted it to be authentic, like a drive in theater so he had another copy of it put on film.”

“Do any of you even know what the film is about?” They all fell silent before looking around at one another, usually at least one of them would have been listening to him when he’d go on and on about his works, but not one of them knew.

“I don’t think he ever talked about this one now that I think about it?”

They were right, he hadn’t talked about it, the only people that truly knew what this film was about had been them and those that had put the work in in making the film. Only he knew the true meaning behind the film though, but once everyone else had seen it it would become a matter of time until they realized its true meaning too.

Eventually the sun had started to set and all of the guests had come flooding into the cafe. The very last four to enter had been the four girls that spent almost the entire day in preparations for the night. Once they entered they all parted ways, Chaewon going off to find manon, Nessa going off to find herself a drink and yn off to find Jungwon, that left Sakoia alone.

“Are my eyes playing tricks or were yn and Chaewon serious about inviting Sakoia to the premier.” Sunghoon calls out, making both Heeseung and Jay turn towards the direction which Sakoia stood, seemingly on a phone call.

“Oh Chaewon actually did it.” Sunoo laughs as he joins the three of them, he honestly couldn’t say that he hadn’t expected her to actually do it after all it was Chaewon.

“Of course this was Chaewons doing.” Heeseung rolls his eyes, he had been trying his best to act nonchalant, as if he didn’t care but it was obvious he wanted nothing more than to go talk to her.

“You still haven’t talked to her yet?” Jay was shocked to say the least, if there was anyone out of the Seven of them that had the least trouble with talking to women, it was Heeseung.

“He’s tried, every time he has she’s either had preparations for a show or he chickened out on asking her out.” Jakes comment only further annoyed him

“Why don’t you just tell her you have questions about a play or something?” Maybe Sunghoon had been onto something with that suggestion.

“Five bucks says he chickens out or she gets another call.” Jake bets as the four of them watched Heeseung finally approach her with a newfound confidence (more like annoyance)

“Jungwon, are you here?” Yn had slowly made her way through the back hallway of the cafe, knowing that Jungwon was bound to be found in one of the rooms if not out with the others.

She found him standing next to a film camera, his eyebrows furrowed as he rewound the film back to its start in preparation for the film night. She stood in the doorway watching with a smile on her face, her hip and head resting against the doorframe.

“Penny for your thoughts.” Hearing his girlfriend's voice he couldn’t help but feel his heart leap in his chest, pulling his focus away from the camera he turned to look at her. As his eyes fell upon her standing there in her beautiful dress, he felt the luckiest man in the world was no one other than himself. His eyes raked over her figure as if he was capturing a snapshot with his eyes.

“How can I focus on tonight's film when my girlfriend is standing here looking this beautiful in front of me.” As she steps inside the room he closes the space between the two slipping an arm around her waist while the other hand rests on the side of her neck and face.

“You're an absolutely breathtaking baby.” He places loving kisses on her forehead and cheek until finally his lips rests on hers making sparks fly between the two. She couldn’t hide the smile that made its way into her face at his gentle loving kisses.

“How were preparations? Is everything ready for tonight?”

“They went surprisingly smooth, other than a few dramatics from Jake, everyone pulled their weight.”

“It really looks beautiful out there tonight, I can’t wait to see how everything came out.” She smiles and Jungwon can’t help but melt at the sight of her smiling before him. This was what he had waited for from the moment he saw her. Spent months thinking of how to approach her, how to get her attention without scaring her off. All the time he spent with her occupying his mind, the nights the two had been alone working on the sound score, it all led up to this moment. He felt content holding her here in his arms, as no one else’s but his.

“Is everybody here already?”

“Mhm we’re all just waiting for the man that made all of this happen.” She smiles, locking her fingers with his as he stares down at her with pure adoration in his gaze.

“Then let’s not keep them waiting any longer.” He brushes the loose strands of hair behind her ear before leading her out of the room.

As she took a seat amongst the others Jungwon made his way to the front of the cafe to give his pre premier speech.

“I want to thank everyone for coming tonight, the film team has been working on this film very diligently over the last two months. I’ll admit it surely wasn’t easy having to go through so many different changes and rewrites but it was all worth it. Usually the films I’ve made in the past have all been some sort of documentations or darker concepts but this one is a little different than the others, please enjoy tonight and I'd really appreciate any feedback you’d like to give when the film is over, thank you.” Once Jungwon’s shows was over everyone applauds, the guys of course cheered louder than anyone else, then the film began.

The film itself had been everything Jungwon hoped it to be, a silent film that focused more of the musicality than it did the lines, though the very few lines there were had been aced by the actors and actress. A love story of two people that had no one other than themselves. An empty world where only the two of them existed, a girl that loved music and a boy that absolutely loved films. Both walk the world aimlessly, alone until they cross paths with one another and discover that they aren’t alone anymore, they’ve found each other. It was obvious in the film that the guy had completely adorned the female lead. He’d look at her with so much love and adoration in his eyes yet she was completely clueless. Always walking around wearing those same headphones, humming soft tunes when the two sat alone together just enjoying each other's company. He’d show her his favorite movies and she’d show him all of her favorite songs. The two of them became inseparable, completely bound to one another, not simply because they were the only two still walking the earth but because their connection was strong. By the end of the film he confesses his love to her in an empty aquarium, pulling her headphones of her ears he stares directly into his eyes and asks her. For once in her life the female leads world silences, no music, no solemn tune just silence.

“Even if there were a million others walking this earth, my eyes will always find you, the girl with the headphones. Through any crowd, my eyes would only see you.”

The movie ended with those words, leaving a lingering feeling in the audience, a feeling of the unknown as well, or at least unknown to everyone that had watched that wasn’t him or the rest of both their friends. They all knew, everyone knew..the film was about her, yn.

As if she herself had just realized it her eyes met him, full of tears, her heart thumping in her chest. He met his gaze with one of her own and wiped away every tear that fell from her cheek. Then he recited those words

“Even with the millions of others walking this earth, my eyes will always find you, Through any crowd, my eyes will always only see you.”

Previous part | Series Masterlist | Full Enha Masterlist

🔖 @jwonistic @jiamini @sol3chu @river-demon-slayer @butterflywonz @squiishymeow @firstclassjaylee

Authors final thank you and goodbye to this series

Thank you to everyone that has read this series completely through, this has been one of my absolute favorites to write and I’m so sad that it’s now come to an end but I really did enjoy writing this one. To anyone that commented, liked, reposted or even asked to be part of the taglist thank you so much i love you all and appreciate your interest in my series

[angelsdean]

me every time tumblr fucks something up and ppl are upset abt it: USE XKIT !!!!! PLEASE !!! xkit has a fix for Everything

truly i cannot sing enough praises for xkit. i get it, if you're out of the house / blogging on the job mobile is easier but, i am BEGGING ppl to start blogging from desktop at home. desktop is your friend!! you can literally customize EVERYTHING abt tumblr with extensions on desktop.

hate the twitter-esque desktop UI layout? go back to the old layout with Stylus.

want to completely customize your dash's color palette? get Palettes for Tumblr.

want no ads? no suggested post? no blazed posts? better quick reblog / queue / draft features? better accessibility features? and so much more? GET XKIT REWRITTEN!

tumblr desktop will forever be superior. it is thee most ideal way to experience tumblr. you can also SEE posts so much better. all that cool art, those cool gifs, and everything else is not condensed to phone-size!

please use tumblr desktop

[fountainpenguin]

Any tips for writing Cosmo? I'm struggling a bit with writing him and I'd thought I'd ask you since I enjoy your characterization of him (and while im here, who is the hardest fop character for you to write?)

Thanks, I'm glad you enjoy my take on Cosmo! He's got a pretty messed-up backstory in my works and I enjoy him :)

?? In the editor, my pics are arranged "a reasonable way" - next to each other, multiple in a line - but in the queue, they're... standalone, and thus a huge mess. I'm so sorry. I hope it doesn't post that way.

Talkin' Cosmo

This post talks a lot about Cosmo in my 'fics, and I have other Cosmo inspo resources at the bottom if you're interested. I'll give some brief notes before deep-diving into what I've done with him.

Cosmo has his clumsy moments, but he's a very good and protective dad! And that's very important to me.

"Mission Responsible," "For Emergencies Only," "Super Zero," "Farm Pit"

He's here for the fun AND the disciplining! He's on top of both! He's trying to equally protect Foop as much as Poof despite their past grievances! He took a laser for his son in "Playdate of Doom"!! D:

Also, Cosmo in "Formula For Disaster" - I will take a grenade or bullet for everyone in this room. Please let me take a bullet for you.

What is UP with Wanda's multi-season one-sided beef with Foop? lmao. He's always polite to her (Calling her Auntie Wanda compared to Uncle Idiot & tolerating her grabbing his collar and yelling in his face). Who would have beef with a baby who's always apologizing and saying thank you? sdklfjsdfj... (Kick his butt, Wanda) Cosmo's seemingly fine with him and even asked for Foop's business card, but Wanda does not like him. Foop brought Timmy some food he's proud he made and she put him to sleep "until his true love kisses him" without telling him that was the condition of the caramel apple she handed him, and then she told the camera that they were all going to live happily ever after... savage... Girl, that is not very "You have to learn how to forgive people after they try to destroy you" of you. Rules for thee, not for me... I love her, but that's really funny. Cosmo's pretty chill with him. I do not think Foop's relationship with Anti-Cosmo is particularly good. Like??? idk why I'm even asking what's up with her beef- It IS canonically Wanda who wants to kill Timmy's parents (S4's "Fairy Friends and Neighbors," plus she nearly kills Mrs. Crocker in S9's "Fairly Old Parent" and only stops because Timmy warns her he's "not going back to jail with her"), but... Wanda, he's a toddler.

Also, Cosmo even adjusts his body language sometimes because he's trying to copy and improve!! Love that for him!!")

"Mission Responsible"

Shout-out to Cosmo in "School of Crock" smiling and tearing up affectionately when he thinks Poof came out to him... regarding Poof "wanting to marry a cat") and he states that he's both accepting and proud of him. This is not what Poof said, but it's the thought that counts.

Cosmo, they could never make me listen to "He's a deadbeat dad" slander <3

He has his lapses in judgment, but he cares deeply about both Poof and Timmy and works hard to be a good parent to them (and later Chloe too), send post.

The other thing you need to know about Cosmo is that he is SALTY as ALL HECK. But... he plays it in a way that I'd call plausible deniability (considering the "dumb" persona he's set himself up with).

Ex: Cosmo has strong feelings about Timmy's parents (He goes into a panic in "Sooper Poof" because "Those two have no idea how to raise a child!" but he usually keeps that on the downlow. I said above that Cosmo seems chill with Foop, but it's worth noting that he spends an excessive amount of time "trying to get a sprite off Foop" at the end of "Spellementary School" by slamming him with a frying pan, and he says words that imply he's playing dumb about it... Interesting...

Cosmo's way of treating people is very different from Wanda grabbing Foop by the collar and screaming in his face, or cheerfully announcing her plan to put him in handcuffs, or when she slapped Juandissimo in the face with her purse in "Stupid Cupid," or (although I don't consider very-late-series Juandissimo to be an accurate portrayal of his character) when she shoved him in "Fairy Con" and snapped that if he didn't back off, she'd "kick him in the butt-issimo."

Wanda intimidates, presumably because Big Daddy raised her that way. Funnily enough, Mama Cosma also tends to use intimidating (Ex: Being outright mean to Wanda, kidnapping Wanda's dad) to the point that she seemingly spooks H.P. and Anti-Cosmo enough to make them back down when she takes Poof from them. but Timmy straight-up grabs her by the collar and yells in her face, and I think that's funny.

Words cannot explain how funny it is to me that neither Cosmo nor Anti-Cosmo are fans of direct confrontation... but Cosmo handles it by getting up close to bother you, pushing the envelope, and Anti-Cosmo will run away. Ex: "When Nerds Collide" - A.C. pours salt on Jorgen's shoes, tells Anti-Wanda he'll be back for her, then scampers off with a look of terror on his face. This man will only taunt you if you're locked away or he has back-up. He's very easily spooked.

Anti-Cosmo when one fairy (Jorgen) stands between him and his wife: PEACE OUT, BABE!

Cosmo when his family's in genuine danger:

Cosmo does not like head-on confrontation if it can be avoided, as he's much more into mind games or distraction tactics (like suggesting Jorgen scramble the fairies, or showing Jorgen a slideshow presentation to stall for time).

Anti-Cosmo always opts for running over fighting (Literally all his episodes except "Oddlympics," which is the only episode where no one threatens him directly unless you count Cupid poofing up angry cheetahs, which... fair) or else he just plain shuts down ("Fairly Odd Baby" & "Anti-Poof" are good examples).

LOVE his streak of looking confused in the background when he doesn't want to speak up. He's always a little nervous and I think it's funny. Even if you break into his house, he won't even yell at you. You can just do it...

Cosmo 🤝 Anti-Cosmo

Big "I don't know what I'm doing" energy

They just cover it with opposite personas... Anti-Cosmo pretends he knows everything and Cosmo pretends to know nothing.

One of my favorite scenes truly showcases Cosmo's saltiness. In "Jerk of All Trades," he offers to show Juandissimo to the room he can stay in (after Juandissimo loses his corporate housing)...

... and promptly throws him in the freezer. Hey, what??

Keep an eye out for scenes where Cosmo seems smug, because those tend to be the best examples of his plausible deniability / clever subtleties

The beef Cosmo and Juandissimo have with each other cracks me up... I like the OG canon that Juandissimo is terrified of Cosmo. In an early script for "Fairy Fairy Quite Contrary" (linked), he straight-up says Cosmo is the only one he's afraid of because he's a "warrior" and "a cunning and calculating foe." Like ??? Excuse me?

-> Part of this did make it into the final version with Juandissimo whining to Remy that he's "lucky to be alive" after Cosmo almost turned his hand into a fist! Why is Juandissimo always flaunting his muscles but then he'll whine that Cosmo spooks him... sdlkfj.

- My secret headcanon is that Juandissimo was once witness to Cosmo losing control (as Cosmo is confirmed in multiple episodes to be extremely powerful and dangerous) and he realized then and there that he never wanted to be on the receiving end of that fury. But nobody ever believes him that Cosmo is scary, so he just cringes and whines in the background.

"Bird Song" (Florence and the Machine) is one of my Cosmo inspo songs for that reason.

Also, I live for the scene in "Super Zero" where Cosmo is holding Chet Ubetcha (whom he was taking to find his car) while Chet reports about how Cosmo is a terrible superhero...

... so Cosmo straight-up says "There's your car" and drops him into a volcano. Incredible. No notes. Saltiest boy in the world. It plays rent-free in my head...

He can be salty for a variety of reasons, but it seems to flare up especially when he's being territorial of his family or space

[Very long post (11k words from here) - Click at own discretion]

Major Cloudlands AU story spoilers up to where we are in the 130 Prompts; if you've made it to "Sentry," you've seen it.

So... Let's get detailed!

[Basic overview, cnt'd from above; the spoiler bits come later]

Cosmo is a mama's boy! We know that pretty well from canon; it's one of his most obvious traits. However... he won't leave Wanda for her (as much as his mother antagonizes him).

- He's VERY loyal to Mama Cosma, to the point of sneaking her into his and Wanda's underwater castle in "Hassle in the Castle" and not telling Wanda about it.

- I think "Presto Change-O" and "Odd Squad" showcase his attachment well- He's reasonably concerned for her and very caring, but he's clearly living his own life at home.

- When he darts out on Timmy in the former episode, he first assures Timmy that when he and Wanda are back, they'll "all do something really fun and magical together." After Mama Cosma recovers from her 9-hour flu, he doesn't make Wanda wait around and takes the lead in getting them out of there (with a cheerful good-bye to his mom).

Context: My Cloudlands AU 'fics strive to be "as canon as possible," and I'm particularly proud of a scene I wrote in "I Just Live Here" where Foop reflects on family relations (and we see evidence of Cosmo and Wanda's relationship straining due to insults):

Once he came clean about his marriage to a damsel she couldn't stand, Mama Cosma couldn't keep her hands out of his life. She threads her son's mind with all sorts of poisoned commentary and doesn't seem to feel a smidgen of remorse. Like… wow. I lie, cheat, and manipulate people too, but when I try to imagine my own mother fighting tooth and nail to split me apart from my friends, that just seems unnecessarily cruel. It's weird. I know my auntie has done her best to tolerate it (holding her tongue and temper in a way that even I admire), but once when I was lurking around Timmy Turner's house before he came home from school, I heard she and my uncle break into a fight. Well… More of a scolding, really. After three or four minutes of listing her grievances against Mama Cosma, Auntie Wanda simply burst into tears. "I can't go to her house anymore. I can't keep going to these fancy lunches in Fairy World. But I worry all the time that if I don't go, you won't come back to me. Mama Cosma can really stick her hooks in you. I just don't feel like you respect me anymore, Cosmo, or like you believe living with me is an improvement over being a mama's boy and staying all day in your childhood bedroom. I need your support when she bears into me. Can you do that?" "I'll try to be better," was his response, stunned and shaky. I'd felt that way myself, curiosity getting the better of me as I floated as near to the window as I dared, my ear pressed against the wall. I could hear my uncle's fingers fiddling with his tie, wrapping the fabric around and around his wrist. "I don't know, Wanda… She's my mama. I know she can be a little harsh sometimes, but she's just getting a little old and cranky. She wouldn't do anything to really hurt me…" "She's been flinging insults at me for years." "… This is real? It's not all just some smart people test about sarcasm or irony or hidden underlying meanings? I'm not good at picking up clues, Wanda… You know that." Then, more quietly, "I'll try… It's just that sometimes I have a hard time keeping up with what's going on. I never feel like I'm in on the joke, and then when I finally am, it's like everyone thinks it isn't funny anymore. And what's more confusing is that sometimes, people say something I thought was kind of mean and everybody laughs, but then other times, everybody gets real quiet and uncomfortable. It's really hard for me to figure out the difference before the words are out of my mouth. And I don't always know there's something wrong unless it's explained to me with puppets or words… but I'll try. Can you keep being patient with me, even when I mess things up all over again?" "Every time, Cosmo. I love you… SO much…" Well. That had been an awkward thing to overhear. But I know why they had that discussion when they thought they were alone in private. I don't blame my auntie and uncle for trying to keep the trials of their marriage away from their son and two godkids. They're doing what they can to provide stability. My own parents could likely learn a thing or two from them. My father shouts a lot when he's upset, and my mother often floats there and takes it, not saying a word. I've overheard breaking plates and sometimes the frustrated pounding of a hand against the wall, but… Well.

I really like this scene because I think it's a good balance of Cosmo being insensitive, but at least somewhat justified in his confusion and misunderstanding ("But... you also say mean things to me" and/or "People think it's funny and I don't always get when it isn't"). It allows me to treat their bickering as canon while also showing them working things out in the background.

It's got Wanda standing up for herself and Cosmo wanting to be better... and I like my set-up of them talking where they know Timmy wouldn't hear, and Foop's just flat-out eavesdropping. Makes me laugh. Everyone here is spot-on, imo.

"Crocker of Gold" is an episode I like for Cosmo's misunderstandings- That's the one where he dresses as a leprechaun and Crocker catches him and demands gold, so Cosmo takes gold from real leprechauns and leaves them a note. They're upset with him, and both Timmy and Wanda are shocked he left a note. Cosmo claims it would've been rude not to. He generally is following a social script... it just might not match the circumstances he's in. I like to think that he skates through life trying to be polite, salty, under the radar, or playing dumb. Those things have gotten him this far in life, so he defaults to them. -> I showed a screenshot earlier of Cosmo changing his body language to match Wanda's. I don't think it's common for him to want to learn new things or change his behavior, but he's all-in at being a good dad and tends to mimic what he sees Wanda do. He follows role models. -> Jorgen is clearly his role model in "Cosmo Rules," since Cosmo also opts for a military get-up while defending Da Rules despite that not being required (Juandissimo didn't) -> In "Oh, Brother," Cosmo lists things that a brother can do for you- Drive a getaway car, lend you bail money - which he's probably saying because his older brother is a con artist. -> In "Something's Fishy," he even mimics Schnozmo's catchphrase: saying "Two words!" followed by something that's not two words. Hilariously, both of these happened in Season 5- Long before Schnozmo was introduced in Season 7. -> And by that logic, it's not surprising Cosmo can be rude and speak his mind a lot since Mama Cosma and Schnozmo are both known for that. Heck, Cosmo gets under Juandissimo's skin in "Fairy Fairy Quite Contrary" by mimicking him, and it was his own idea to do so.

Notably, in Poof's POV section of this same story, he says he and his dad visit Mama Cosma's without Wanda, and shares this:

When I'm with the Cosma side of my family, Mama Cosma lets me put my feet up on the furniture if I want to. I definitely can't do that at my granddad's because my nonna would have a fit. Mama Cosma doesn't care if I eat in the living room, even on her couch while we look at old scrapbooks of my dad and Uncle Schnozmo when they were kids (Plus old yearbooks of her and Papa Cosma… but my papa died when my dad was only two, so I never got to meet him). There's definitely… a weird vibe at Mama Cosma's prim and frilly little house, though. She loves my dad and he'll usually spend the whole visit with me when we go, but my own mama won't set foot anywhere near my grandmother's house anymore. When I was a baby I didn't really get it, but then I learned to read and figured out why. Mama Cosma frosts all her cookies so they say my mother's name with large Xs or strike symbols through them… or if not that, then symbols of raging fire. I feel really bad not eating her cookies because she always works so hard on them and they taste so good, but I feel like I'm betraying my mama when I do. My dad gets quiet and evasive about it, but… he just tells me not to worry. He says I can do what I want, and that if I don't want to eat them, he isn't going to force me. So there's that. I've seen my dad get confrontational before, but he's usually pretty tame around my grandma. I brought up the cookies to my mama once and she tersely said we'd "talk about it when I was older." So I asked Timmy while we were filling out coloring books and he told me everything. Mama Cosma can't stand my mama… Timmy says it's because my mom "took away her little boy" by marrying her, which is what led him to move out of her house and into a new place with my mom. It's weird. There's a nagging feeling in my gut that makes me suspect that's not the whole story. I'm not even sure I want the whole story, so… I guess I'll take my mama's word for it. She'll tell me "when I'm older."

They are brothers, your honor...

Mama Cosma is important to Cosmo. She may not like his wife, but she was also his sole caretaker for tens of thousands of years (knowing what we know about the war between Fairies and Anti-Fairies taking place 90k years ago, since "Balance of Flour" is its anniversary, and we know Cosmo and Wanda have only been together 10k years).

I like to think Cosmo wants Poof to know his grandma since Cosmo and Wanda were cut off for so long. Cosmo has a paternal grandpa on his canon family tree ("77 Secrets of The Fairly OddParents (Revealed)" - Grandpa Gonzo - but Cosmo lost his dad young and I don't think he's close to his grandfather.

Family's important to Wanda too - she's very close with her dad - and I think she and Cosmo both make sacrifices for each other's happiness and Poof's sake, even though it's hard on them both.

Again, I like to play Cosmo as a mama's boy trying to balance the complexities of his life... Allowing Wanda space away from his mother, but also letting Poof have the chance to meet his grandma, but also telling Poof that if he doesn't want to eat the I Hate Wanda cookies, he doesn't have to.

I also think it's worth nothing that Cosmo tried his dang hardest to be very positive about his pregnancy and childbirth.

- He had a lot of hormones messing with his mood (leading him to be confused when he batted Timmy into the basement while in bear form, then returned to fairy form and couldn't find him), but he was super grateful for his pregnancy (Handled his morning sickness without disgust & we see him apologize for inconveniencing Timmy several times). - He didn't even resent Timmy for snapping at him and telling him to get lost, which is nice since Cosmo has a history of petty grudges. During his contractions, he's the one telling Timmy and Wanda to remain calm and to enjoy "this beautiful moment." - Even while actively giving birth and clearly in a lot of pain, he insisted childbirth was a wonderful experience (fighting for a smile through his tears, his eyes red around the edges as he held and rubbed his belly... Doin' his BEST to get through it). - I think it's interesting how positive he was since sometimes he can be very pessimistic (Ex: "End of the Universe-ity" when he points out that "Fairy powers are totally lame and limited and will last 5 more years, tops" compared to Dark powers).

I have to showcase Cosmo's happy moment followed by /double blinks in confusion as his newborn is taken from him.

Every one of these faces is precious... He's a daddy! Thank goodness he has his precious baby! His hair is still extra ruffled from his stress and strain! He's in his hospital gown! His baby is his world! His godkid is delighted, and Cosmo is so happy to have his two boys in his life! ... oh no. help him.

Does Cosmo have his feet spread under the blankets the same way Peri, Anti-Cosmo, and Anti-Wanda all spread their feet in A New Wish to support heavy books? That's funny... He has a big baby in his lap...

I think... that covers my overview of How I Suggest Writing Cosmo In General:

- Mama's boy who's thoughtful, salty, a good dad, and doing his best to keep his marriage together because he loves his wife (although he does struggle to find the line for his teasing). He's not big on confrontation, though he'll stand up for his family when push comes to shove. - He does get jealous, but he and Wanda BOTH admit to having crushes outside their relationship; I don't think it's entirely fair to judge Cosmo for his fantasies without also judging Wanda, who's equally blatant in multiple episodes and has very questionable interests. I like to think they both know the other wouldn't really go for anyone else, though I do agree I'm not the biggest fan of these jokes. - He loves both Timmy and Poof. I didn't touch much on Timmy in this post since it's long and there are many good episodes of their dynamic (Timmy has a tendency to trust Cosmo and leap without looking). - Looks for role models to mimic. For better or worse, he grew up with Mama Cosma and Schnozmo, so he can be overbearing, sly, and rude. Loves his baby and his family very much. Very protective... Please let him take a grenade for them.

I think if I were to personally start my take on Cosmo from scratch, I'd ask this:

- What am I depicting Cosmo do? Who taught him this behavior? -> His mom was overprotective of him, so he probably read it in a book, got it from a kid at school, or picked it up form his mom or brother. - If it's none of these things... Why is he doing that action? (If he's older, maybe he got it from watching a godkid or reading a comic book). Is he following a social script from his culture? -> That's a good opportunity for worldbuilding. - He might've put in a lot of work, because something about the behavior is important to him (or was in his past). Since he's often associated with cars ("School's Out! The Musical" flashbacks, "Cosmonopoly," he's the car in "Odd Squad," his racecar bed in "Hassle In the Castle"), -> I've always imagined his car was the one thing he had that was truly his, and it represented freedom from his mom. After all, two episodes confirm he was driving in his younger years (and we know from "Transparents" that Wanda lacks experience)

These are good starting points if you're looking to develop a deep Cosmo portrayal with layers of backstory, though you can always keep it simple (especially for short one-shots).

I do think nailing down your interpretation of Cosmo's backstory is a critical aspect of deciding how you portray him in present day (as with any character). Everyone's vision of his story will be different, leading to their own take on Cosmo (and potentially Anti-Cosmo).

⭐ Here are some backstory jump-off points!

- "This Is Your Wish," "School's Out! The Musical," & "Cosmonopoly" are three episodes from the OG series episode covering the main story beats of Cosmo's backstory (Implied to have lost his dad young, grew up with his mom, forced into military school against his will, sunk Atlantis (9 separate times as of "Something's Fishy"), marrying Wanda). - "Double-Oh Schnozmo" debuts Cosmo's older brother, who clearly takes advantage of him. Schnozmo was off the radar enough that he didn't know Poof existed. Cosmo has great faith in and respect for his brother, and is heartbroken when he realizes Schnozmo took advantage of his trusting nature- There's a moment as he's talking through it that you can SEE the moment he breaks... That to me is quintessential Cosmo.

Cosmo, having just said "He must think I'm the biggest fool in the world!" and freezing up one beat before he hurls his ham into the forest and takes off to be alone... He knows. Their past, their fond memories... How much of it was real to Schnozmo? Does his brother even care for him? He splinters.

- Neither Cosmo's mom nor Wanda's dad knew their children were married until "Apartnership" and "Talkin' Trash" (respectively), though Blonda seemingly did in her debut. Cosmo implies at the end of "Talkin' Trash" that he wants to take over the Fairywinkle family business?? Also, it's heavily implied Big Daddy was going to let Cosmo stay with Wanda when Wanda moved home, and it's important to me...

- Speaking of family, Cosmo found out in "Cosmo Rules" he has von Strangle blood. In my canon, he trains to take over as Keeper of Da Rules after Jorgen after he leaves Timmy and Chloe (and it's probably something I'll carry for him to New Wish 'fics since he could be doing it in his godparent retirement era- especially since Jorgen's more mellow in New Wish). There's lots you can do with that!

- Anti-Cosmo was old enough to represent his people in a truce attempt during "Balance of Flour" (canonically 90k years pre-series, as it was the anniversary in that episode), heavily implying Cosmo and those older than him fought in this war.

- Cosmo claimed he never went to Spellementary School (in the episode of the same title), but in "Love Triangle," he confirms he had a role in the school play.

-> He becomes a "pageant parent" to Poof in this episode, hovering around him and making Poof run his lines over and over even though Poof is clearly uninterested (Wanda even using the words "You know Poof doesn't want to be in his school play"). He reminds me of his overbearing mama!

- "Truth or Cosmoquences" depicts Cosmo's high school years. Juandissimo claims he met Wanda during high school, they're confirmed to have dated, and Cosmo taunts Juandissimo in "Fairy Fairy Quite Contrary" by claiming he "lost his woman to an idiot."

-> Juandissimo is on good enough terms with Cosmo and Wanda that he attends, like, 5 different parties at their house in the OG series (including the baby shower Wanda's family didn't show up for) - I don't normally see people treat "Cosmonopoly" as canon, but I personally like it; I use the diner as the place Wanda started to fall for him since she wasn't very happy about being hit by his car. - Cosmo confirmed he designed his Cosmonopoly game to remind him of the day he met Wanda. He heavily implies he went to Pixie World to do his laundry that day (Pixie Woods is a location next to the laundromat). In my 'fics, I depict him sneaking out to get time for himself and using his laundry time to write his books. Funnily enough, Pixie World's laundromat was already established in my works even before this, because Rosencrantz works there. -> This potentially plays into the Pixies having Cosmo on their radar & Cosmo implying he met Sanderson sometime before "Pixies Inc." (i.e. he told Sanderson that if he "doesn't recognize him, it's probably the hat").

- Officially, Cosmo was designed with a 50s aesthetic. You could draw inspo by researching the 1950s. What hobbies or special events were popular?

- He's likely to have Megan Bacon trauma (a past godkid of his from "Past and the Furious"). Canonically, the past versions of Cosmo and Wanda are AWOL when Timmy looks for them in the past because they were hiding in her closet.

-> She's still alive (and fairly young) in present-day Dimmsdale, having gone on to open a notable restaurant seen in many episodes: the Cake 'N Bacon. In "Vicky Loses Her Icky," this restaurant was inexplicably across the street from Timmy's house.

-> Funnily enough, I don't think he really showed what I'd call "Vicky trauma" in the OG series, despite the fact she did mess with him. That's more of a New Wish thing, but I do think he had Megan trauma.

- In Season 5's "Hassle in the Castle," Cosmo and Wanda keep portraits of all their past godkids, including those they had poor relationships with (with these replicas of MaryAnn and Pierre specifically wanting revenge on them; MaryAnn claims they "deserted her."

Cosmo and Wanda instantly recognize MaryAnn when she's running around the castle, even though she killed Archduke Ferdinand and it's been a while since they've seen her. Even Cosmo? Who's not always the best with names? -> That said, we do know Cosmo snuck Mama Cosma into the castle in that episode and her door is down near the portraits. Him sneaking his mom in is a whole other can of worms. Also, they have Crocker's portrait in the Hall of Fame, not the Hall of Infamy!

- And if you want to go all the way back to Season 0, Cosmo and Wanda claim in "The Zappys" that their godparenting career is "speckled with failures," which Cosmo seems sad to admit.

- In both the OG series and New Wish, Cosmo and Wanda have separate beds. Cosmo's is a racecar:

Hilariously, this is one of the episodes Wanda blatantly tells Cosmo she's daydreaming about Juandissimo. For all the bickering and irritation and "the ol' ball and chain" and "naggy wife" jokes... I do think it's funny that they're both completely open about having crushes on other people. Totally fair if people have a strong dislike for that part of their characterization, but I can't help but respect the sheer confidence and closeness they have to admit those things and that it won't ruin their relationship.

-> We know from "Stupid Cupid" that Cosmo finds Juandissimo hitting on Wanda annoying, but lets him flirt with Wanda because he keeps sending her food, which Cosmo eats because Wanda doesn't want.

-> Shout out to Cosmo in "Truth or Cosmoquences" when Juandissimo hit on Wanda and Cosmo instantly broke character from his façade as Britney Britney's husband and shoved himself between them... and then had to back down when Juandissimo innocently asked why he was so huffy about him merely asking for a dance with his unmarried secretary 🥺

Season 6's "Wishy Washy" gave us teen Cosmo and Wanda, where we see Cosmo with braces and a skateboard. He confirms to Timmy that at this point in his life, Wanda wasn't his type (because "he likes 'em with a little more swirl in the curl.")

I've always thought it was funny that Cosmo likes to say "swirly" when he's absentminded, like "Portals are swirly." Man's always thinkin' 'bout swirls...

I drew him and teen Anti-Cosmo once!

- After Cosmo started disguising his nose with magic ("The Boy Who Would Be Queen"), but before Anti-Cosmo chose to do the same. - Specifically, Cosmo went through a rebellious teen phase (slipping away from his mom to go play & later pick up a job at the diner, planning to buy a car himself). - Anti-Cosmo became excessively devoted to my zodiac-themed Anti-Fairy culture (He's wearing a shirt depicting the Fae zodiac & wearing bracelets to symbolize being born in the year of Water).

It's very important to me that teen Cosmo and Wanda refused to play along with Timmy until he uses reverse psychology on them by insisting they're not meant for each other. And that SNAPS them to attention... At their core, they've always had their rebellious streaks. They do not like being bossed around.

Honestly, if you're only going to pick one thing to focus on... I think the most critical detail to consider when writing Cosmo and Wanda is that they eloped without telling their parents. If you think about how they left their lives of being coddled behind for each other, you can take that anywhere.

Anti-Cosmo's backstory is pretty unknown, but you can use parts of Anti-Cosmo to build a take on Cosmo as well.

For example, Anti-Cosmo's mother might be very harsh to him since Mama Cosma coddles Cosmo. Or, you could argue his mother's completely absent from his life since Cosmo's is always around. I like to think she really wanted Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda to get married. I personally play her as both physically abusive and emotionally overbearing. Cosmo crushed on Wanda for a long time, but I really enjoy slow burn A.C./A.W. as they slowly move from being annoyed by or disgusted with each other to admiring, respecting, and loving each other. I gave Anti-Cosmo bipolar disorder (due to his extremely high-energy moments in "When Nerds Collide" (where he rapidly flies in a circle 13 times in a row while still talking... yes, I went frame by frame and counted) and "Balance of Flour" (where Anti-Cosmo was unable to sit still while in disguise and revealed himself in front of everyone by running off and laughing). In his other episodes, he's in a mild state. -> Fun Fact: Technically, Anti-Cosmo has a magical parallel of bipolar rather than what humans have, and he treats it by rubbing Fairy pheromones on his face. In-universe, Fairies consider him to have divus displacement disorder (D3) and consider him "a Fairy in an Anti-Fairy's body" while Anti-Fairies believe he was born with his soul intertwined with a nature spirit's (whom he called Clarice in his youth). A.C. has a habit of drifting near H.P., who has strong-smelling pheromones. Anyway... My Cosmo has depression - especially postpartum depression - as a parallel. He struggles with a lot of personal issues, especially regarding his magical strength (Ex: turning his dad into a fly as a baby, leading his dad to never be seen again in the series).

Here are detailed examples from the backstory I gave my Cosmo because... I like talking about him:

Cloudlands AU Cosmo - #ridspoilers

Major spoilers up to the end of where we currently are in the 130 Prompts; if you've made it to "Sentry," you've seen it

I treat "77 Secrets of the Fairly OddParents (Revealed)" as canon, meaning Cosmo's deepest secret - that he's the author of Astrophysics For Morons and several other books - is something he has ISSUES telling people about... which I tie into "Wishology"'s canon of portraying stars as ancient Fairies.

Yeah... Cosmo writing stuff that his culture hates does not go well for him in my work :'D

Cosmo struggles a lot with his love of books, hence why this is a secret for him. In Cloudlands AU canon, Fairies tend to have a brawn over brains culture and Anti-Fairies a brains over brawn one; Mama Cosma sent him to military school against his will to try to push him towards the brawn culture.

During / after the war with the Anti-Fairies ("Balance of Flour"), Fairies weren't exactly charmed by brains or Anti-Fairy culture sympathizers, and Cosmo - who used to write political commentaries and kids' books that broke culture down in easy to understand ways - became an instant target, leading us to this scene:

"Let them come for me." Cosmo raised the point of his wand against his temple. "These memories are all that I have left. Look, it's simple. You don't want my insights on politics and religion leaking any further into the world, and I don't want you in my life ever again. So if you take one step forward, I'll blast them out here and now. You can tell Adelinda that you were left to scrape my time keys off the floor." "So I am the bad guy now? We've opened the castle for refugees like you! Art, history, all the science you could ask for… The charts, the maps!" Cosmo bobbed gently up and down, but otherwise didn't move. He didn't even blink, the wand still pressed thumb-deep into his head. "Yeah, right! You've von Strangled every scrap of success I ever had out of my hands. Why would this be any different?" A scowling Jorgen shifted forward then and Cosmo threw out a hand. "No further! Or I'll wipe my memories here and now!" Jorgen braced his staff against a jutting piece of the wall, leaning beside it with folded arms. "The revolutionaries are out there hunting for those who threaten society with radical ideas, Cosmo. Your stories of gas balls and tongue lashes towards the Council are the reason you've landed in their sights. You can burn your books, but erasing private memories hurts no one but yourself. Plus, I can still take you to the Pink Castle anyway. It seems a very foolish trade you are fighting to make." Cosmo narrowed his eyes. "But when you get me behind those walls, you're going to scramble my mind up anyway, right? Because you work for the Fairy Council? At least if I blast myself, then I don't let you get to have the satisfaction…"

"Repeat"

After this point, Cosmo started erasing his memories on the regular and became a lot more unstable and unhappy with himself.

That said, I do think the war helped give him a purpose, lifting him a bit from the depression of his younger years over missing his father. He finally felt like he had something worth fighting for and was making up for the harm he caused, now out there protecting his people.

It's around this point in time that Cosmo - looking for a new career and now a smidgen more confident in himself (and looking for a new passion in life) - switched to the godparenting major, where he ended up doing a trial program with Wanda for Erg.

Erg being the godkid they claimed to have 50k years ago in an episode where they're celebrating their 10k years of being godparents, implying Erg was a special one-off case... Checks out since 50k years ago would've been well before they were married ("The Past and the Furious")

Cosmo grew increasingly infatuated with Wanda from here on out, and learning to be a godparent also kicked off his love for children.

I like to play Wanda as "better with" wish-themed playtime and adventures while little kids tend to think of Cosmo as "more fun" when they're playing with toys. He's pretty imaginative. I like to think Wanda's humor is high-brow and flies over little kid heads (Depending on their age). One of my favorite headcanons is that Cosmo owns a lot of toys and likes to leave one with each godkid. Probably a bunch of toys his mom gave him since she coddled and fawned over him so much, so he's rehoming them.

So /claps hands. We've set Cloudlands AU Cosmo up to want a baby. Can u see where this is going?

I personally treat the baby H.P. and Anti-Cosmo raised as 100% canon. I made him the counterpart of the candle model!

Here's some 2018 art, though I need to redraw / redesign now that my art skills have improved. Btw, I saw someone say they were sad this screenshot was fake, but :'D... I assure you, it's 100% real. It's in Jorgen's presentation of "Fairly Odd Baby" when he specifically uses the word "raised" to speak of Anti-Fairies and Pixies with children, and he shows this photo plus a flashing sign labeling H.P. specifically as "Bad," implying the kid has a connection to Anti-Cosmo in species, but H.P. was the real threat. I don't know why they drew H.P. with those glasses or added shading either, but it's real.

Let's talk Westley first! If you remember he's living with Blonda and showed up in "I Just Live Here..." congratulations! Poof slept in his room when he stayed with his Fairywinkle family for spring break that year.

He leans in to kiss me on both cheeks. I blink up at him, wide-eyed, and he pats my shoulder instead of ruffling my hair. Even though I have really, really ruffle-able purple hair, so I'm kind of glad he refrained (I don't like anyone but my parents and Timmy touching my hair, except I sometimes let Gary do it, and I really hate combing out the tangles). "Go back to sleep, cuginetto. We can talk more in the morning."

He was raised by Jorgen and Binky, specifically (playing into "Fairly Odd Baby" canon where Jorgen tries to take Poof from Cosmo and Wanda, telling them he'll raise him and will only let them visit him for one day every other millennium, plus Jorgen shows himself holding a baby in his slideshow presentation).

Binky dropped out of godparenting to be a stay-at-home caretaker for him on Jorgen's behalf.

Reminder: Binky and Jorgen are a gyne-drone pair. They don't live together, but they're basically in a QPR The Origin of the Pixies chapter "Inner Workings" is a good peek at their dynamic (back in the day), though H.P. refers to Binky by his surname (Abdul).

Westley is extremely bitter towards his bio parents and, while he respects Binky, doesn't particularly like him or Jorgen (or Cupid) as all three played a part in removing his chance at "a real family." He cut ties and changed his family name to Periwinkle.

AKA, before Poof was born, Westley went into modeling in Fairywood and Blonda took him under her wing. Blonda considers him a nephew

Poof looks up to him a lot names things after Westley - notably his egg baby in "Two and a Half Babies" - and that was canon in my work for years before A New Wish, sdkflj...

If I had a nickel for everyone in this family who changed their name to Periwinkle...

Frayed Knots is a 'fic about how Anti-Cosmo got to the point that he ended up with Talon - Westley's anti-fairy counterpart - and why H.P. is the one helping him raise him... Short answer? Anti-Cosmo wrecked his life for that child and a lot of people have issues with him because of it :'D But H.P. took him in...

Talon sneak peeks from late Frayed Knots!

“Yep. Talon, your dad’s out of it. Which is perfect, because that means I can do this.” H.P. clamped his hands around Talon’s waist and tossed him into the air. Talon squealed with surprise and apparent delight, and H.P. caught him when he came back down. “You are adorable. Oh yes you are, my Cú Chulainn. Yes you are.” “Again!” Talon cheered. “Nope.” There was a pat like H.P. placing small anti-fairy feet back on the floor. “One free sample per pup. If you want more services, you have to pay for them.” “Again!” H.P. sighed good-naturedly. “All right. One more time, Cú Chulainn. But, only if I can trust you to keep this our little secret.” “No! I’m going to brag to all the others that you tossed me twice. I had my fingers crossed about the promise.” “Oh, you’ve got me there,” H.P. told him in monotone. He rustled Talon’s hair with his huge hand. “Go play.” Talon trotted away, laughing. I clenched my claws deeper in the ruffled fabric. He never laughed for me like that.

&

Talon stomped his foot. “I don’t wanna go back with you! I want to stay here with my other dad!” H.P. and I looked at each other. Then he dropped his attention to Talon again, bending on one knee. “Talon, you’re adopted.” “Really,” I cried, “you’re starting with that?”

Also, shout-out to older Talon in Pink and Gray-

"I hate the inheritance traditions!" Talon's wings exploded behind him, flapping wildly. "It's not fair! You weren't even supposed to become High Count after Anti-Bryndin. Everyone only agreed to let you lead the Anti-Fairies because you have green eyes, but when it's me, your son, who should inherit after you, they're not going to listen, are they? They're not! You don't want me to be your heir! You only keep me around because I'm the only anti-fairy who's been born since the fairy baby mandate cut off all your other options. Or else you'd just dump me on H.P. forever so you don't have to look at me anymore and think about all your old mistakes. You want another kid because I was born with red eyes like some kind of commoner!" "Talon, enough." Anti-Cosmo swept his arm to the side. "You'll wake the hotel. Worshipers have traveled a long way to visit the Water Temple." "Look at me! Look me in these eyes and tell me it's not true!" Anti-Cosmo clenched his teeth, but didn't glance away. "I said, that's enough now. I broke the law to give you a healthy life, child. One would think you'd respect me for that." "The people," Talon snarled, stabbing a claw vaguely in the direction of Anti-Fairy World, "should accept me as your heir, no matter what color my eyes are." "I don't disagree, lad, and I don't intend to argue with you. However, you must realize that it isn't within my power to alter the expectations of an entire society." He stepped forward, fur bristling. "Bet the gossip's true! Bet you were unfaithful. Bet you had me with some hired anti-will o' the wisp for a handful of coins. Is that where I came from? Are you even my real father? Do you ever plan to tell me anything?" Anti-Cosmo tightened his grip on his wand, but regarded the furious anti-fairy with cool collection. His hand twitched, but he kept his arm low. "I will not argue with you, Talon, and I will not succumb to your goading. I am your father, Anti-Wanda is your mother, and despite your legitimacy, you did not inherit our spirit-blessed eyes. That is all you need to know, apart from the fact that if you do not hold your tongue, you will lose your inheritance tonight. Do not try my patience further." Talon simmered a moment more, then swung around and stalked away down the hall. "Telford Anti-Westley Anti-Lunifly. You have yet to be dismissed. Don't you dare turn your back on your High Count while he's trying to converse with you!" "'Trying,'" Talon said, and kept walking.

& "Health Bars"-

"What did you bring me?" Talon asks, looking up. Anti-Cosmo's eyebrows shoot into his hair. "'Bring you?' Why, I wasn't even aware you would be here tonight." Talon sticks out his tongue. "H.P. always brings me stuff when I see him." "True," I acknowledge. In my head, Anti-Cosmo's hitpoints drop into yellow. Anti-Cosmo gives the younger anti-fairy a pitying look. "Then he's spoiled you into being a selfish little brat, I'm afraid." And to me, narrow-eyed, "Thanks for that, actually." "Whoa. Hey. It's not my fault you deprive him of modern technology when he goes to stay in Anti-Fairy World. We agreed from the start: If you want to raise him Zodii, then I get to expose him to pop culture. Go ahead– ask him about memes. I've trained him well."

I just love him and my messy 'fic drama so much... Talon, my beloved.

Because this is a notable part of Anti-Cosmo's backstory - especially the conflict Anti-Cosmo and Talon have - it played into me giving Cosmo that aforementioned dream of wanting kids, which led me to scenes like:

"So, when can I meet Nixie?" Saffron frowned in the rear-view mirror. "Oh, did I not send the letter? You sounded like you'd read it over the call. You seemed fine with it." "L… letter?" "I changed my mind about adopting her out. Jorgen said he'd waive my file at the station if I trade her to him instead of you." He slammed so hard on the brakes, Saffron's glossy lip tube flew past the windshield.

"Repeat" - Cosmo's failed attempt to bring Nixie into his life... Nonetheless, he didn't give up

So... I found an episode with an interesting detail, and I really latched onto it and built my images of Anti-Cosmo and Cosmo around it. Simple enough start!

I lucked out in finding something I thought was super interesting to delve into (especially at a time no one else in the fandom had mentioned it... or at least not in 'fics tagged H.P., because I think I read all those and most if not all of the Anti-Cosmo ones available back then, at least on the sites I used, haha).

Even though I don't consider "The Fairy Beginning" canon as a whole (due to it violating too much established canon), it's still canon in my works that Cosmo stayed with his aunt and uncle for a while and lived under their stairs, which is... hoo boy.

"No, I didn't! I didn't do anything wrong!" Cosmo tightened his arms around Westley's back, beneath the baby's tiny fluttering wings. "It's not me or my fault, okay? It's just… just… Look, it wasn't supposed to happen this way!" Holding babies left him breathless, and Cosmo tried to shift his weight to hold him a little better. Westley kicked him in the chest. "I know I can't keep him, but you can't let Jorgen take him away." "Oh heavens, that's a real baby. There is a fairy baby in my house right now. I'm gonna be sick." Blonda floated backwards, one hand on her stomach and one on her mouth. The sleeve of her robe slid down to her elbow, dangling like a fish fin. She turned a full circle, pacing in the air, then swept back and grabbed him by the shoulders. "The A.B.B.'s been out for weeks. How hasn't Jorgen found you yet? Tell me you haven't been on the run alone. At least say you have another friend in the world besides my sister and me." "O-okay… Uh, we haven't been by ourselves all this time. Is that the right answer?" Blonda leaned her head back against the whitewashed wall. "Oh, Darkness devour me…" Cosmo bit his lip. "We were staying under my aunt and uncle's stairs for a while, b-but I know they're getting close…" As the breathing lines clenched up around his throat, his fingers curled into the yellow towel a little tighter. "Please, Blonda… Can we stay? And can you help me find milk without showing my face at a store? I ran out, and Jorgen wants to take him away so he can teach him to fight and bully everyone. I can't watch that happen! And… and Cupid will just throw him in a cage for the rest of his life. And I'm scared! If Jorgen takes Westley to his fort, then Anti-Cosmo will waltz straight in and waltz out with him again. A-and babies can't waltz!" "What… Where did you even find…? Babies are illegal in our subspecies without Eros consent. And the Eroses never consent outside the exhibit stock. Did you break into the Nest and take one of their kids?" "Blonda, I… couldn't just let them…"

"Repeat"

And from there, we get this art of Cosmo, Westley, and Nixie:

And this bit from "Told You So"-

"He went for milk," Florensa repeated as though in a daze. Sanderson… sighed. He replaced the silk cover on his crystal and dropped his eyes to his desk. Had his elbows always been this pointy? His arms looked thin and scrawny, barely able to hold his weight. He leaned against them anyway and brought his eyes to hers again. "Forgive me for the small talk. My question may be useful to you… Has your son experienced a major drop in energy? An increase in time spent sleeping? A lack of interest in his usual favored activities? I can't imagine he's in the most whimsical of moods right now." "How do you mean?" "Well… Last time I saw him was at Fairy Con. He floated on sagging wings, looking distressed out of his mind. H.P. had me report it. Even for a fairy, I noticed he expressed considerable emotion during Jorgen's speech. Dm. Cosma, I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I think I heard your son ask if he could go back on forget-a-cin. Is this true? Pardon me if I am insensitive with this subject, but… How is he handling the separation from his kids?" There it was… cold and dark between them, like a smooth stone dropped into an unmoving pond. Florensa's blue eyes sharpened like snakeupine quills. "Those… those LEECHES under Jorgen's wing are not my son's children! That miserable SHREW forced responsibility on my precious boy! Oh, I'll wring his little blue NECK until he turns purple from it all!" Sanderson stared blankly back at her, too tired to argue. Now would have been a really good time to have his shades. Could she read his thoughts from his eyes? He tried again. "Has Cosmo spoken lately about the kids? I seem to remember he tried to disappear after Westley was born. Fairy World put out an A.B.B. It wouldn't surprise me if he still thinks about them sometimes. Perhaps he went looking for them. Or went to challenge Jorgen." If Jorgen had crushed him into oblivion with one of his mighty fists, that too might explain the shattered wand. Florensa's wings bristled up. "We don't talk about the kids at home," she snapped. "It wouldn't be good for his health! My son is… He's… he's… Well, he's been under so much stress in the workplace! You know how it is, particularly at his age. I just hope he's not been hurt." Hurt? Sanderson grimaced. It was all too easy to imagine Cosmo flattened into pancake form if he set foot anywhere near Westley or Phoenix. The pair were still the talk of Fairy World to this day. Two common fairy babies… the youngest of their subspecies. The first ones born in 370,000 years. They had to be 40 millennia by now. Jorgen bragged about them at every social opportunity, like he'd finally filled a void deep inside him that godchildren never could. And Anti-Cosmo, of course… Well, Anti-Cosmo had been elated with how things turned out. That was sarcasm. Ha ha. Ha ha. But still true, to some degree. Emotions can be hilarious. From the way he fawned over Anti-Westley (Well… "Talon") with his hands clasped against his cheek, you wouldn't think Anti-Fairy World's bachelor king actually lost his first wife over the whole affair. Or his daughters, for that matter… Anti-Saffron had taken both Anti-Miranda and Anti-Phoenix when she left him. As far as the media could guess, the High Count lived by gritting his fangs to bear it.

Aaaaaaaand this plotline in 130 Reasons Why I'm Fairy Trash! :')

"A firstborn will always have more magic than their siblings. Up to two layers of magic can wrap themselves around the core. If the child is the father's firstborn, they'll receive one extra layer, and if the child is their mother's, they'll receive two." Poof's head snaps up like a spring. His hand jolts after it. "But it's okay if they don't… right?" His question seems to catch Serena off guard. "Uh. Well, there's nothing wrong with not having the layers. Younger siblings can be equally as healthy as the firstborn. The extra magic is simply a small benefit the first receives." "Um, what happens if you're a firstborn who doesn't have extra core layers?" "Then that person isn't actually a firstborn." "… What? Are there any exceptions?" "To the firstborn bonus? I don't believe there are any. At least, I've never heard of one." Denzel keeps his head low, scratching out notes, until the silence between the two fairies drags on way too long. Uhh… He looks up again. Poof stares back at his grandmother, shock bleeding his face out to white. She hovers at the front of the room wearing the same look of confusion that Denzel himself might have shown to dancing chipmunks on a ceiling fan. "That's… not true," Poof croaks back. His voice wavers on a string. He drops his head to the desk, wrapping his stubby arms around his head. Um.

"Looking Back"

"Am I adopted?" Poof blurted, not answering the actual question. Auntie Wanda's brows shot off her head. She looked at Cosmo. Cosmo stared back at her, wide-eyed and frozen

&

And he laughed, throwing his arms out too the side. "Poof, do you even hear yourself? Or did you just flunk anatomy class? Only firstborns get extra core layers." "… Aren't we firstborns?" "Do… do you not know?" The mental damage Poof took after those words slammed straight into his brain a second later. Foop flinched back, gripping his hair in one fist. Poof's heartbeat spiked- hot, fast, and undeniable, because a cold cloud crashed into Foop's chest like a clenching fist. A spark of purple fire flared like a spooked rabbit in the depths of Poof's eyes. He's not joking. "Has your dad not talked to you about this?" Gary made an attempt to suggest they call it quits for the day. Foop only half heard him. "Poof," he spluttered, "what? You know my Vatajasa name is Fry-sün d'ichord. Did you think I use the title 'second child; second son' ironically!?"

"Sentry"

Finley was just, like… taunting me and saying that I'm adopted." The memory flares tears in my eyes. I sniff, sort of pathetically, and wipe my eyes on the back of my hand. "But I'm not… I'm a Cosma and a Fairywinkle." "Adopted," Big Daddy repeats. He flicks his eyes from my crown to shoes. They coast along the freckles down my sides. He shakes his head then. Firm. "You wouldn't have the gene for lateral spots if you weren't a Fairywinkle. Your pheromones match the family's too. Cherry almond. Even if yours are underdeveloped, I can sniff that on you from here. Forget about it, Poof… There's no doubt about it. My little cannoli Wanda is your mother, as sure as I'm your granddaddy."

"I Just Live Here"

😬 ... Yeaaaaaaah...... I've been planning this since 2016.

So, hmm.. I wonder why I drew this during my music meme years ago...

Yeah... Yeeeeeeaaaaah... That's rough, buddy.

Also, no matter the universe, Anti-Cosmo is notoriously bad at paying child support and consistently has a rougher relationship with Talon than H.P. does :'D

I also want to point out that when you're introducing characters and major plot points, take the time to consider how they fit into the world and play off other characters! Talon and Westley influence a ton of people, including Anti-Cosmo, H.P., Anti-Wanda, Cosmo, Wanda, Poof, Foop, Blonda, Big Daddy, Jorgen, Binky, Cupid, Sanderson, each other... etc. And all this from two photos of two characters who were onscreen for mere seconds, several seasons apart, and don't have speaking lines or even animation...

The big follow-up & "tying loose ends" 'fic for Poof's "Am I adopted?" anxiety is the upcoming Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Pixies - named after a song Wanda wrote, according to "77 Secrets of The Fairly OddParents (Revealed)."

It's Poof POV and parallels Foop's war POV in "You'll Never Know." I'm looking forward to posting it, but it's massive and - despite everything this post covers - still contains a lot of major Frayed Knots spoilers related to Cosmo's trauma that we didn't even touch on here, so... it's my baby. Huge personal favorite, though <3

The night before you sent this Ask, I actually sketched potential animatic panels for the Big Fish song "Showdown," even though I don't plan to make an actual animatic. It's been on my Poof inspo playlist for YEARS and was haunting me...

btw, if you like this song... I'm not telling you to do anything, but I AM telling you the songs for this musical regularly disappear from YouTube and have been on and off for many years

Cosmo Wrap-Up

So... [inhales].

When it comes to writing a fan portrayal of a character, there's no replacing doing your own personal study, whatever that means to you - watching episodes, reading 'fics, studying other people's analyses - as you strain out your own version of him.

I think backstory is a really good jumping point for deciding what kinds of things you want to do with Cosmo, and how it ties into how he acts in canon.

Obviously, there's a lot going on in Cloud!Cosmo's backstory... and this despite the fact he's one of the characters I rarely put onscreen. He's one of those "characters who haunt the narrative" for me.

... I barely touched on Nixie drama in this post, but if you can guess where THAT'S going... congratulations! It's been heavily foreshadowed in my lore since the start and is super messed-up :'D.

Frayed Knots, my cruel beloved...

My Cosmo is super specific, and the many intricate layers at play here definitely influence how I write him. Which is a fantastic jumping off point for me if I ever get stuck.

Key points that come from the backstory I've given him include:

- Cosmo growing up without a lot of life experience, so he looks to others for advice. This can easily lead him to trouble if he follows the wrong crowd. - Tension between Cosmo and Mama Cosma, especially in regards to her being annoyed at Wanda and wanting Cosmo to marry someone who's "better for him" - Cosmo doesn't give up easily & is willing to take matters into his own hands. However, he does have his breaking point and massive amounts of trauma and anxiety, which he covers by wiping memories from his head - Cosmo is overprotective of his car because it's one of the only things in his life that's exclusively his and which he has control over (Setting us up for drama in "Repeat" when Poof panics about how he crashed the car... which spirals Poof into his vegan lifestyle, where he punishes himself by cutting meat from his diet despite being a carnivore, so that's a whole thing) - Cosmo is smart in a very specific way related to the stars, cars, energy, electricity, and the Fairy baby ban history... things that aren't necessarily common for godkids to ask about. Also, some random smarts leak through his fractured memories - Cosmo struggling with self-hatred because "he used to be smarter" and gets upset he can't remember things well - Cosmo in hiding (Ex: Only pays with cash to avoid being traced; I have an upcoming scene where he starts panicking about how he's slow and holding up the line and Poof steps in to help) - Cosmo's memory problems (Regularly on forget-a-cin) - Cosmo being clingy towards Wanda and/or struggling to make friends and trust others (especially in academia) - Cosmo's postpartum depression (Struggles with snappiness, loneliness, and fear that Poof doesn't like him) - Cosmo and Wanda having their second kid (Dusty) very early compared to the usual distance between siblings in Fairy society - Cosmo desperate to soak up time with his kids / godkids (Leading him to grant Timmy's secret wish to freeze time - Canon event) - Cosmo and Wanda being really anxious about Poof's relationship with Goldie, who comes from a species known for "tempting drakes away from their parents to join harems" (à la "Opinion" when they try to discourage Poof from dating her) -> And the change of heart Cosmo and Wanda have later in "All I Ever Wanted" when they tell Poof they support him and don't want him to elope and cut them from his life like they cut their parents. -> And Cosmo being extremely "dad" and gentle with Poof in that piece when Poof has his anxiety attack - Cosmo will absolutely have a breakdown if you ask him directly about Westley or Nixie, which is why he and Wanda are waiting until Poof is older to bring it up.

Actually, here's a scene about that last one!

“My friends said I’m not a firstborn because I don’t have the extra magic layers around my core. Am I really your first kid?” My dad screamed. No words, just a scream. I jerked back, and he whirled around and slammed his hand into the wall. It slid down, and he went with it in a shaking mess on the floor. Mom took my elbow and guided me from the room, promising we’d talk later after she made sure he was all right. I hovered in the next room, hands clapped to my mouth, not sure what to do. That evening, Mama came to find me. “Poof-” “I don’t want to know,” I blurted, plugging my ears. I clenched my eyes shut. “Just tell me I’m a weirdo who was born without the extra layers. If I’m not your first, I don’t want to know.”

Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Pixies

:'D ...

[Laughs in Frayed Knots] - Cosmo honey, you've got a big storm comin'...

For anyone wanting to write Cosmo, I suggest finding some moments from the show (OG series, New Wish, whatever) that you find interesting and want to delve into (or that you use to define your personal view of Cosmo- Who he is; what you like about him).

You might end up wanting to write a backstory 'fic, and if you don't, at least you'll have a good idea of what you envision his story being like, which can shape creative interpretation of his character.

A loose outline, thought web, or note sheet might be helpful- I usually make Tumblr posts or write one-shots to work through my thoughts.

Obviously, a lot of the stuff I listed above are things the series never delves into. I like the freedom of making stuff up for Cosmo, exploring what makes him tick in my own way, but there's nothing wrong with keeping it simple like "Well, my Cosmo was a small town kid who didn't really leave home until he fell in with Wanda."

Whatever you do, I'm sure it'll be interesting! Feel free to tag me when you post your 'fic so I can check it out <3

Other Cosmo writing resources:

- My brief bio of Cosmo

- Let's Talk Cosmo - Early character study

- My "Cosmo can be a tricky character to write" video clips + my analysis of them (I always meant to do one of these for other characters, but never got around to it~)

- Personal analysis on Cosmo's depression - I write Anti-Cosmo with bipolar disorder and this has been an interesting parallel.

-> Cosmo's postpartum depression is particularly fun for me and was glimpsed in "Repeat" flashbacks where he was hiding emotions from Wanda & working through his "Why would the baby like me if I don't even like me?" struggles. I always wanted to make its own 'fic about it, but it was very depressing, so I stopped :'D whodathunk...

- I like this scene in "I Dream of Cosmo" where Cosmo is trying to pull the reins in on Timmy's Dad :)

- I also like this scene from "Desperate Without Housewives," which takes place in Season 9 (after Jorgen stops wiping Crocker's memories in Season 7*. In this scene, now that Crocker's memory isn't wiped anymore, Cosmo blatantly outs himself as a fairy and Crocker just :|

* very heavily implied; my interpretation of the ending is that Jorgen actively exposed Crocker's relatives to Fairies to power the Big Wand and why would he erase Crocker's memory if he's doing that, but it's not technically confirmed... However, the episodes after this do seem to depict Crocker extremely sure of Timmy's fairies, no longer theorizing, and Kevin... also seems to have some memory immunity? Unclear, but if Cosmo was acting Like That in "Chip Off the Old Crock" because he was trying to pull the same joke with Kevin he pulled with Denzel, that's flippin' hilarious. But Timmy's Dad doesn't know and I like to think Crocker is covering for Cosmo in front of him in this scene when he nervously laughs Cosmo's comment off

Characters I Find Tricky to Write

I'll try to keep this section short since this post got out of hand, but thanks for asking!

I do think Cosmo is very hard to write. I'd probably say he's the most difficult for me. I can talk all I want about what I think his character IS, but that doesn't mean I know what to make him SAY in any given scene- especially considering I tend to write drama stories, and that's not a good playing field for him (He's better with adventure or romance or humor).

Secret knowledge I have from a close study of Cosmo I did once upon a time - he favors long sentences, not choppy ones. I feel like it's easy to default to "This character doesn't have deep thoughts, so I'll just have them say something quick and random." I'm sure Cosmo has his fair share of short comments, but recognizing his long sentences changed something for me. Made me think more carefully about how specific he's going to be.

I think he worked great in "Repeat" when he was the POV character and had to move things along - he had no choice & his internal dialogue was able to cover for the characterization his dialogue couldn't - but I don't do well when he's a side character and I need him to "say something funny" to sound like Cosmo.

Not one of my favorites to write, but that's because I like making characters clash and have long conversations about complicated topics. Cosmo isn't necessarily a fun one for that, or to see get in an emotionally heated situation with. I think he'd just leave... ... but I liked "Repeat" when he COULDN'T leave us, so we were privy to all the secrets he wouldn't say.

You might be surprised, but I genuinely like writing Anti-Cosmo long and rambly- I get to do this in Frayed Knots (which is a completely unique narration tone from Origin of the Pixies, which is informative but blunt).

I especially liked Reedfilter Rules Chapter 2, when he uses some VERY heavy (as in flowery) and long-winded language for his internal commentary. Sadly... a lot of people aren't fans of reading that kind of thing :'D And I do not blame them... but I enjoyed it.

That chapter took YEARS of on and off attention to finalize because I wanted him to be perfect before I locked myself into a certain style for the rest of the AU, but honestly... I'm not sure I can - or should bother to - mimic that for future chapters.

idk. I think it's fun, but my goal was to write RR!Anti-Cosmo's internal narration distinct from Clouds!Anti-Cosmo's, and I think I succeeded. Just not sure if it's worth doing twice to that extreme.

One of the comments Frayed Knots tends to get is that it's exhausting... not only for length of its own merit, but also because Anti-Cosmo rambles about worldbuilding and it can make readers free pressured to retain the info and/or it just confuses or bores them. And I totally get that...

... but also, I cannot emphasize enough that Knots' style is like that on purpose. Have you met this man? He SHOULD be bothering you- he's REALLY annoying and he talks a lot. And also, if you get lost along the way, I think he'd find that amusing and would do it more. lmao. get wrecked.

/whispers loudly - His whole thing is that his mom and stepdad think he's annoying and they're not especially nice to him - in fact, they both outright abuse him - and they don't really feel bad about it because he is just THAT bothersome, which is why he falls in with people like H.P., Blonda, and Anti-Wanda - who "just get him" - down the line. Hilariously, Wanda does not have patience for him... as much as he has a crush on her and wishes she did.

Sorry to everyone who takes his longwindedness as clumsy, frustrating writing. You're correct, but so am I. If I have to sit here in his annoying head for 8 years of writing this 'fic, you have to sit here with me <3

Genuinely though, rambling is A.C.'s thing and I like doing that in his other POV stories, like "Yellow Flower Number 9" (linked below). He literally stops shopping to dump his woes on a cashier and I think that's very fitting for him. Man loves his monologues...

I write a lot of H.P.-Anti-Cosmo interactions, but because I strive for canon-compliancy, I can't allow H.P. to call him by his "A.C." nickname until he canonically gives it to him in "Fairly Odd Baby" (A.C. seems surprised by the nickname, but says he likes it).

- You wouldn't think it would matter, but the amount of times I've had to sigh and fix a draft with the nickname is not 5. - Compare with "Yellow Flower Number 9," where he calls him A.C. like 4 times in 20 minutes, lol.

Hmm, hardest character... Ooh, I think it's Jorgen. I really like how I wrote him in "Whatever," specifically here-

Jorgen's hand shot forward. He grabbed Juan in his fist and squeezed until the fairy shrieked and started spitting pleas. Then Jorgen jerked his hand over to Seneca. She flinched back. "I am not here to wait around and answer all your pathetically obvious questions. That is what he is for. You can ask him. As for me, I have two appendixes to separate and a great deal of paperwork to do." He dropped Juan to the floor, then crashed his walking stick (Star staff, sun staff) down too. The force of it sent a shockwave across the clinic.

- but I'm extremely self-conscious of him in general. I don't use him much.

Oh, Chloe takes a ton of attention. She has a super specific speech pattern of using contractions to start her many, many follow-up sentences to her thoughts (She builds on her thoughts and elaborates in a series of addendums).

She speaks her mind and is kind of "deadpan snark" about it, but in a happy way. She also has very weird phrasings. Fascinating.

I wrote about her speech pattern HERE, but she's unique for sure. I'm quite pleased with how I wrote her in "This Is a Box."

I also think Vicky can be tricky to balance realism with what a threat she is... particularly if you're trying not to lampshade the consequences of her actions (although the show does). I look forward to writing her in combination with Dale especially. I have free reign to push Dale way past where I can realistically push Timmy without Timmy reacting, so I think that might be fun.

I had a lot of fun writing Trixie in Chapter 4 of Come What May, when Kevin meets her at Shirley's Pizzeria (and I enjoyed Tad, Chad, and Veronica both in that chapter and the previous). Kevin meeting the popular kids was one of my favorite topics in general :)

I struggle with Kevin flipping from high energy to extremely self-deprecating. I tend to play him as dead inside, which I do think is accurate, but I do think Come What May is missing the humor that comes from being the guy who kicks down a door yelling "Yo, yo, you! Crockmeister in the hizzy!" or answers his phone with "This is the Crockmeister; crock to me!"

I'd love to finish this 'fic, but it always feels depressing to me :'D I was going for "quirky middle grade adventure," but I ended up with gloom and creepiness. Idk what to do to make it fun and I hesitate to touch it if it might bring me down, so I procrastinate.

I think I need to practice my Mark Chang voice to make him more fun and quirky instead of stating plain facts.

Also, for the longest time, I felt kind of guilty that I write Anti-Cosmo as an overly anxious loser when (afaik), most of the fandom don't consider that even close to their vision, so I felt like I was bashing on their favorite even though I was genuinely trying to write him the way I see him, but... sldkfj. vindicated!!

Thank you New Wish for reminding me he really is that much of a cringefail loserboy <3

No matter what happens with the series from this point on... "Battle of Big Wand" Anti-Cosmo, you will always be famous to me.

[quentin136]

so i may have just spent 4 hours reblog-queueing Double Trouble fanart

thank you @thankyouthankyoudt for reblogging so much DT fanart over the years. i see your account hasn't been active since 2021, but i salute thee nonetheless. if one day you come back to your account and see hundreds of notifications from one person, my bad 😅

[taggedmemes]

RANDOM SONG LYRICS 003. as shuffled on my phone. change wording as desired, etc.

do we get what we deserve?

we get what we deserve.

do you date to look him right in the eyes?

they will run you down.

nothing heard, nothing said.

feels like i'm going insane.

it can creep up inside you and consume you.

it's too close for comfort.

if you must falter, be wise.

am i scaring you tonight?

release me from this curse i'm in.

trying to maintain, but i'm struggling.

while we're on the subject.

could we change the subject now?

looking towards the future.

we were begging for the past.

we knew we had the good things, but those never seemed to last.

everyone's unhappy.

nothing ever went quite exactly as we planned.

our ideas held no water.

i laugh all the way to hell.

everyone goes crazy over such and such and such.

we just used it as a crutch.

i know this of myself and i assume as much for other people.

was it ever worth it?

was there all that much to gain?

we knew we'd missed the boat.

a tiny man would tell a joke and get a tiny laugh from all the folks.

what useless tools ourselves.

true that love in withdrawal was the weeping of me.

you're good to me.

with the roar of the fire, my heart rose to its feet.

i fell in love with the fire long ago.

though i've handled the wood, i still worship the flame.

zip your lip like a padlock.

i don't really care where you live at.

baby, shut up.

think you'll be getting this? nah.

i wanna be naked and you're wasted.

you're always saying some shit.

it's another tequila sunrise.

just another lonely boy in town.

she wasn't just another woman.

it's a hollow feeling.

take another shot of courage.

this old world still looks the same.

don't write yourself off yet.

it's only in your head.

just try your best.

try everything you can.

everything'll be just fine.

you know they're all the same.

you know you're doing better on your own.

it doesn't matter if it's good enough.

they found her lost in her memory.

when the sun calls it quits, the penny drops.

the summer of another lover come and go.

she's gone when the leaves turn brown.

never met another who was as good a lover as you.

________'s not a bomb site, it's a treasure chest.

she said i should come over.

don't you know i'd chop a limb off just to have a good time.

shut up and move with me.

get out of my face.

i didn't queue for an hour to leave straightaway.

shut up and stay with me.

let go of my hand.

i never knew i was a techno fan.

this is not a weird weekend.

it's an angry wormhole.

i never wanna see this stop.

new blood joins this earth and quickly he's subdued.

through constant pained disgrace, he learned their rules.

deprived of all his thoughts, he struggles on.

i dub thee unforgiven.

they dedicate their lives to running all of his.

this fight he cannot win.

he the prepares to die regretfully.

never free, never me.

you labeled me, i'll label you.

she was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene.

she told me her name as she caused a scene.

be careful of who you love.

__________ is not my lover.

so take my strong advice.

always think twice.

i will never rust.

if you like your coffee hot, let me be your coffee pot.

you call the shots, baby.

i just wanna be yours.

secrets i have held in my heart are harder to hide than i thought.

[scallioncreamcheesebagel]

Song of the Year 2024: Preliminaries!

thank you to everyone who nominated a song, we got almost 500 nominations!

the preliminary polls start now! i'll be queueing them so one posts every hour, as there will be quite a lot of them. you can blacklist #soty24 if you aren't interested.

VOTE IN THE PRELIMINARY ROUND HERE!

the following 12 songs have made it through to the main bracket automatically:

1nm8 - EGOlution (from Paradox Live)

Aespa - Supernova

Chappel Roan - Good Luck, Babe!

Cosmo Sheldrake - Does the Swallow Dream of Flying

Debby Friday - To The Dancefloor

DECO*27 - Monitoring

Jacob Collier - World O World

justan oval - just a little shrimp

Kesha - JOYRIDE

Stray Kids - Chk Chk Boom

Tom Cardy - Transcendental Cha Cha Cha

Weird Al Yankovic - Polkamania

everything else will either be appearing in Artist Preliminaries (for artists or soundtracks who received enough nominations for a guaranteed spot, but for multiple songs) or General Preliminaries (for artists that did not receive enough nominations for a guaranteed spot).

the list of artists and soundtracks that will have their own preliminaries and a guaranteed spot in the bracket is below. check if your favorites got in!

Arcane (OST)

AURORA

B-Project (OST)

BABYMETAL

BAD OMENS

Cane Hill

Charli XCX

Chonny Jash

Creepy Nuts

Doechii

Dungeon Meshi (OST)

EPIC The Musical (OST)

evidentlyfresh

Femtanyl

Fish in a Birdcage

Geordie Greep

Good Kid

Green Day

Guilty Gear Strive (OST)

Hozier

I Saw The TV Glow (OST)

Itzy

Jade

JamieP

Jeff Satur

Jhariah

Kendrick Lamar [✨ Not Like Us was the most nominated song i received, with 31 nominations!]

KMFDM

Lady Gaga

Lil Nas X

Linkin Park

LOOSSEMBLE

Madilyn Mei

Magdalena Bay

Marianas Trench

Megan Thee Stallion

Mother Mother

Nmixx

Poppy

Porter Robinson

Reliqa

RM

Sabrina Carpenter

Starlight Express 2024 West End Musical (OST)

Taylor Swift

Teacup Captor

The Crane Wives

Tilly Birds

Tyler, The Creator

Yseult

if you nominated a song and its artist doesn't appear above, and the song was eligible for the bracket, it will appear in the general preliminaries.

[lostgracestories]

Hello! Can I request some Morgott/Tarnished headcanons about them being consorts and their married life? <3 Thank you!!

YESSS ILY <3

I have severe Morgott brainrot and istfg I love this emotionally constipated omen king <333 thank you for this request! Lowkey, as usual, this will probably be all over the place but I hope you enjoy none the less!

wc: 709 tw: do i need a tw for weapons?, mention of drunkeness (no one's actually drunk, also is that a word?)

~Marriage and Consortship~

Morgott is a very busy man. Like, very busy. Between paperwork and other kingly duties, he worries he hardly has time for his precious consort. However, he is ever so grateful for the patience you bestow upon him. he does not think himself worthy of such grace.

Whenever Morgott has a break in his busy schedule, he immediately fills it with you. Finished signing the last contract for the day? He's by your side in seconds with a cup of tea (he's old he probably likes tea, right?) and he makes sure that you know he loves you.

Obviously, it took him a while to get used to this new change in his life. Never in a million years had he thought he would be married and as such, he has no idea how to pick up on queues. "I wish a big strong man would come open this for me" "Wouldst thou like me to fetch one of the soldiers to help thee?" "...No Morgott I meant you" And you know he'd blush like an idiot every time something like this happens. (and he'd obviously help cause he loves you)

Morgott has a difficult time expressing his feelings through words. Despite his expansive vocabulary, he's never gotten a chance to speak in such a way with someone. Every once in a while he will try to compliment you and it will be so awkward that he vows to never do it again. (he will, in time) "Thy beauty is like a thousand swords, sharp, relentless, and unyielding" "...huh?" "...I meant... thou art fair...?" but lowkey, he would try to compare you to things he's familiar with and oftentimes it will have to do with battle and sometimes the erdtree.

Morgott unironically switches from calling you "Tarnished" to "My queen" and "My lady" the moment you both are joined through consortship/marriage. And he'll be damned if he admits that his heart beats a little faster when you call him "My king" although, it's so very obvious by how his body shifts around and his gaze leaves you when you say it.

Morgott had a ring handcrafted specifically for you. It definitely had a design resembling vines and leaves and the band is for sure gold. You don't even want to think of how much it cost him.

Morgott also sucks at receiving gifts. When he saw the mountain of gifts after their (albeit small) wedding, he nearly fainted. He still feels guilty accepting things from people, even if he knows you say he's worth it.

Morgott had always insisted that the two of you sleep separately because he feared he would accidentally harm you. So, when you came into his room on the night after the wedding, he stared at you in confusion. At first he thought you were drunk but instead, you had climbed into bed with him and expressed that you wished to sleep in the same bed from now on. He was hesitant but he allowed it. He had to admit, he actually enjoyed it.

Morgott sometimes lets you help him make political choices. If he becomes stuck on a certain matter, he will seek you out for help. "My Queen, thou art so gracious, pray tell, wouldst thee help me with this issue?"

He 100% loves to garden. During your wedding, he had made your bouquet by hand out of erdleaf flowers. It was so gorgeous that when you asked him to help you preserve them, he instead made you a little bench in his garden (he can definitely do woodwork too) for you to sit amongst his erdleaf flowers. Whenever he walks past the garden and sees his beautiful wife sitting amongst his hard work, he is immediately pulled out of what he is doing. No matter how important it is. He can't help but admire you from afar.

And lastly, he of course always humors your little date ideas. Even if it means sneaking away from his kingly duties to go watch the stars. If the night was cold in those moments, he would definitely allow you to find warmth in his tattered cloak. (you could beg and beg but he refused to get rid of it for better clothes)

[glass-noodle]

Sir/ma'am/Tham please I beg of thee you repost too much there was one time I got seven or eight consecutive tumblr notifications from you just reposting please slow down, thank you

From a person who also loves your art

I’ve gotten conflicting opinions (and I personally find it pretty funny) but let’s settle this with a poll:

[loonarii]

the best kpop songs you've (probably) never heard

the title is there to sound good, if you are an individual with taste who happens to listen to a lot of 2nd gen and nugu 4th gen girl group music then there is a high likelihood you will know many of the songs on this list. also omfg if any of these songs are like globally known smash hits that everyone and their mother knows im sorry lol im just dumb and late to the party apparently. This will most likely become a series, so stick around for a part 2 and drop your favourite kpop deep cuts in the comments and reblogs. my june kpop monthly roundup is dropping tomorrow, so stay tuned for that too. ~ ari

(1) Someone Like U - Dalshabet

On the fateful day that spotify snuck this banger into my queue after my daily five hours of streaming SNSD music, my life was forever altered - something shifted in my cranium, the veil was pulled from over my eyes, and I was introduced to probably thee most underrated 2nd gen banger known to man. I was going to say this is one for the SNSD stans, but to be honest, this one is for the stans of good music. 'Someone Like U' is jazzy, anthemic, and quintessential kpop. And to the OG Dalshabet stans... how does it feel to know you have superior taste xx

(2) UN-NORMAL - Queenz Eye

This is such an if-you-know-you-know type of track, the few people I've talked to on discord or whatever who know of this song are obsessed - you either know it and love it or don't know of it and thus exist in the before times, because there is only before Un-Normal and after Un-Normal. I'm slowly realising that I just really love it when kpop does jazz because this is another banger along those lines. Now that I think about this kind of takes notes from AEAO, and I know for a fact you love that song, so go give this one a stream.

(3) Joker - Dalshabet

Yes, another Dalshabet song, because THEY DESERVE THEIR FLOWERS. Like 'Someone Like U', 'Joker' also has that jazz-meets-girlpop edge that we love but with a little more sass and spirited confidence. In 'Joker' the girls aren't as much calling for the attention of the audience, but implicitly demanding it. What I would've given to have been a kpop stan when dalshabet were making music. What could have been.

(4) Colors - LOONA

(this is the obligatory reminder that there is a boycott going on against LOONA content to protest Blockberry Creative's actions towards the girls - please stream LOONA music via the twelveM account or the loona podcast on spotify, and dont watch official LOONA content on youtube either. thanks xx)

This is your once a post reminder that I am in fact a die hard orbit, and this track from the '[X X]' album lingers in my playlist month after month, so I had to include it. Filled with airy vocals from the members, distorted vocaloid decorating the background of the soundscape, along with all the classic bells and whistles we know and love from this group, 'Colors' is classic, quintessential LOONA. Give her a (boycott friendly of course) stream, and experience rookie era LOONA in all their glory.

(5) Chiyu - tripleS

This song dropped only a couple of months ago with the rest of the '<ASSEMBLE24>' album, and while the tracklist as a whole was stellar, 'Chiyu' is utterly gorgeous. Ethereal and hypnotic, giving this song a listen late at night with headphones is a deeply spiritual experience. tripleS are really the ones to watch in the 5th generation, and 'Chiyu' makes that blatantly clear. You probably heard the title track 'Girls Never Die', and if you ventured into the realm of the b-sides you probably remember the upbeat anthems like '24' and 'Heart Raider', but if you let this one pass you by, I would highly recommend another listen. This is making it onto my 'best of 2024' list for sure.

[ariemfox]

park/adams propoganda: s8e3 charity case 💝

⚠️ okay bear in mind i'm fucking insane about these two together, so this is a long post! u have been warned lol ⚠️

♡ s8e3 charity case: a.k.a thee park/adams episode ♡

*slaps this episode on it's head* so this bad boy is a biggie. the park/adams gateway drug u might say. lemme indoctrinate u into the masses (:

first meeting

firstly i want to bring ur attention to park's tiny face at adams when they first meet & house announces that adams will be her new colleague.

what a soft, hesitantly hopeful & shy expression! *squishing her aggressively*

& then adams ignores her bc she's pissed at house for lying to her about meeting for coffee. queue park's face afterwards in the background:

she looks down, her smile drops & she is disappointed. poor bb </3

house then responds that when ppl ask to meet for coffee, they don't really mean coffee. he then does his typical "we should have sex jk unless 😉🤪" bs to adams. she gets pissed obvs & so does park on her behalf

look at that face (protective gf). she's like "i punched my old boss for this before & i will not hesitate to do it again, bitch"

now, on to the burgeoning hints of reciprocation. park finally comes forward and reassures adams that her working volunteering for this cunt of a man (said affectionately) won't be so much work with the softest, gentlest face (supportive gf). & then adams does this cute lil face scronch like she's grateful for the encouragement or like she thinks it's sweet of park, and this is pretty much what pushes her over the edge to finally acquiesce to house (:

bickering = flirting

now on to this second scene! couples therapy w/ house (but house being house just agitates the drama lol).

one thing about these 2 is that they bicker. a lot. like married couple on the brink of a divorce levels. now think of bickering as their foreplay. like, take a look at that face adams gives park in the shot above & u know what i'm talking about. if u locked them in a cupboard together after this they would not come out for a while, is what i'm saying. it's the way infuriation = passion = love.

another interesting thing about these 2 that comes up in this scene is how they r like opposing forces which attract one another. they have opposing views on complete selflessness (adams for bc altruism is a sign of good morality & park against bc it is a sign of stupidity as it shows a lack of self-preservation). adams puts others before herself & vice versa for park. park is family-oriented, adams isn't. they have opposing backgrounds (adams is rich and priveleged & park had to fight her way up from the ground). adams likes giving, park hates owing. hell i'd bet money that they have opposing blood types if u know what i mean lol. & their opposing views feed off of each other via their arguements, constantly attracting them to one another across the series. It's the fact that they actually stop & listen to each other's points too <3

anyway, back to this scene. whilst they are mid-arguement park has this personal bit where she bites back at house & describes how both her and her family did everything to get her to where she is now, in spite of all the obstacles. & god, adams' lil smile:

she is a proud gf. that is a look of love & admiration from afar (:

when house asks for a rebuttal to this, adams realises she's lost the arguement and is just like "oh lord i like her sm: she is my secret fantasy about being poor personified <3" (the poor fantasy is also a canonical thing, might i add. she's so fucked up. i love her ur honour.)

the mating ritual of gift-giving pranks

and now on to the beef of this episode's propoganda!! the fucking gifts oml. now from our paralleling case study of the show's otp of 'hilson', we know that flirting in this show includes bickering (✅️), existing as dichotomies of one another (✅️), gay jokes (✅️ - we will address this later), and also pranks (✅️) and gift-giving/sacrifice (✅️); the last 2 we now see in this plot thread. now unfortunately there is no scene of park & adams smoking cigars together bc there is not an equivalent lesbian subtextual symbol (maybe breaking into houses by picking locks? god knows) but i'd bet money they'd be doing it in this show if one did exist.

also park never drugged adams or vice versa, but house/wilson didn't do this until like s3, and park/adams have only been in one series total. it is understandable that they have yet to reach that v intimate stage of a relationship.

so anyway, gift-giving. adams just casually comes in with a coffee which she gives to park. now firstly, notice that she gives one of the 2 coffees she has to park; she doesn't give one to house. honestly, he's a side character at this point.

secondly, some eagle-eyed sapphic enthusiasts and/or nerds may recall that several scenes ago house mentioned 'if someone asks if you want coffee, they obviously don't mean just coffee'. & makes a sex joke.

now add those two things together and what do u get? u get a courting gesture with rich guilt & parental issues as a subplot! and later park gives her a free 'coffee' in return too; a corresponding gesture with insecurity & immigrant family pride as a subplot. talk about reciprocation of feelings via gifts amirite (:

my girl adams is trying to woo park with her money and morals lol. this is such a her thing to do ffs. like look at that lil smirk in the above pic ffs. meanwhile park looks like a deer in headlights lol

park tries to offer money back & gets obviously flustered when she realises she owes adams. she doesn't even sip the darn coffee bc she's so suspicious of receiving gifts & owing someone - code for receiving love from someone who doesn't expect u to give anything in return.

she reckons there's some sort of ulterior motive, which is so fucking sad but also same, understandable. especially with this convining basket case *points at adams*. her trust issues/insecurity likely stem from growing up in an immigrant family & crucially, from what we learn in a later episode. her ex bf went 'on a break' with her to sleep with 2 of her friends and then dump her. she was really damaged by this so it makes sense that she's suspicious of a free coffee between 2 gal pals ):

when park says adams is a stranger & that's why she doesn't trust her coffee gift, adams starts crying on the inside in this pic.

then to support the sapphic vibes of this episode, we ofc get a random 13 cameo - she's got a new gf btw, in case u forgot that girls can like girls. oh btw here's another scene of park & adams together!

it's the 2nd phase of the gift-giving prank: the shoes 🩰

so. if ur still reading, this scene caused me to have a conniption fit. park asking adams if she wants her to "wear them (the shoes) while you masturbate". yeah we're on to the gay joke realm of flirting now ppl. & honestly do i even need to say anything that park hasn't already said? adams' face in this above pic already says her part ig.

anyway, this comment flusters adams but she still doesn't stop trying to give away her fucking shoes. the persistence is on par with chase's 'it's chewsday oi like u <3'. then park threatens to punch her to get out of the situation. classic house-ian relationships amirite <3

so then park continues the flirting by getting adams a job interview, adams then gives park a spa certificate, etcetera etcetera. even house with his broken-ass gaydar starts to feel the vibes & gently interrogates them both.

house @ adams: "either you're getting her gifts because you want her to like you, in which case i don't like you, or you're getting her gifts to screw with her". why can't it be both. have you maybe considered that it could be both. also, interesting use of the word 'screw' (see: sex), especially when it's in relation to gift-giving. yeah there's deffo subtext here

& may i emphasise that in her convo with house, adams states that the coffee gift that she gave to park was not her 'screwing' with park, it was a genuine gift of kindness. a.k.a it was not in the prank realm of flirting (pranks are house-ian foreplay for teasing), it was in the realm of real, gift-giving flirting; as in showing love without expecting anything back.

lessons from the master of gay subtext via pranks (a.k.a. house): "if you wanna win, you gotta do something she can't possibly reciprocate. you gotta push her neuroses to the point where even she thinks she's crazy". this sounds so... <3 something u cannot reciprocate? like a proposal? (jk). then there is pushing on her neuroses - kinda like pulling on her pigtails as a sign that u love her.

house makes a 'charlie's angel's' ref when 13, adams & parks are all in the same room together discussing the case. i'm told charlie's angels gives off very sapphic vibes. so parallel ig?

adams paying $4500 to get house's park's car fixed and then saying "smile and say thank you" to park is such dom behaviour. also she's so smug when park says "you win" & actually thanks her. I love them. look at her smile as park walks away (: <3

park says she is glad the prank war is over, to which house replies: "nothing is ever over". yes house. just like my love for park/adams & their endless slow-burn flirting. <3

that's a wrap for s8e3 park/adams propoganda-posting. i admire u if u got to the end of this coherent mess.

might do park/adams propoganda on other s8 episodes (particularly analysing comphet park behaviour with her "i've had loads of boyfriends" & the whole park/chase are-they-friends-or-are-they-lovers dynamic), but we'll see. <3