#gunchpost

[gunchhorseman]

Fun Fact: The horde is approaching, there is nothing you can to stop us. Whoville and Gotham will soon be ours.

[gunchhorseman]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALL SOUTHERN HEMISPHERE THOROUGHBREDS!!!!!!

happy birthday to all the tbs in the southern hemisphere!

[gunchhorseman]

Blogs rated by how likely I am to beat them in combat.

@the-muppet-joker: Has already fallen in battle. Even before this I feel like I could easily beat him, in a scenario where he is hypothetically alive I give a 8.7 / 10, my valiant steed and companion could easily keep up with him speed-wise and I could easily goad him into a disadvantage approach using mental warfare and mockery. 8.7 / 10 chance of my victory

@statleragainstposers: An arrogant foe who believes himself to know more than he actually does. This does not mean that he is at all unintelligent, not at all, but his constant need to be perceived as the smartest in the room is a blindspot that I can exploit. By purposefully baiting him with blatantly false info spouted at full confidence which he cannot help but debunk I can distract him allowing me to go in for a fatal blow. I must be aware though, he is a notable user of traps, which could potentially immobilize my steed and force me to continue the battle on foot. 7.4 / 10 chance of my victory

@muppetjokernumbersixtyninefan: We would not fight, for I would never hurt an equine entity. N/A / 10 chance of my victory

@muppetjokernumbertwofan:Has inherited the same flaws and weaknesses from his so called savior. Lacks the speed advantage or leadership qualities the original Croaker had, 9.6 / 10 chance of my victory

@nextnumbermuppetjokerfan: Seems extra vulnerable to fire and heat damage based on one of their posts. Other than that I know little about their strengths which lowers their score by a bit, will likely increase as I gain my info on them. 7.8 / 10 chance of victory

@muppetjokerfannumberidk: French. I know their weaknesses inherently based on that single fact. 10/10 chance of victory, will be folded.

@muppetjokernumberfiftysevenfan: A worthy challenger at last, seems to be adept at tulpamancy and channeling divine light, which one of my major weakness. Also seems to be harboring a fallen god. 3.7 / 10 chance of victory, best strategy is take them by surprise and go all out on a single killing blow before they realize whats happening

@muppetjokernumberfivefan: Known studier of the blade. I am unsure of what he would do when backed into a corner which is a bad omen. 5.1 / 10 chance of victory, but its likely there would a mutual showing of respect after the battle regardless of victor

@muppetjokerfannumberfour: She scares me, 0 / 10 chance of survival

@olipopsoda: do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in do not let them in

@themuppetjokernumber420fan: Seems to avoid violence and prefer peaceful solutions to things. Ideally we would never have to fight but if we did I would crush them and their weak lungs. 10 / 10 chance of victory

@descimatedcroakernightmares: Another worthy challenger, has a decent head on her shoulders and is a master of psychic and mental warfare. Decent chance I would lose. 4.2 / 10 chance of victory

@descimatedpiggydreams: A scary opponent to face, has killed and will again. Emotional baggage related to Miss Piggy is material ripe for psychic warfare and mental warfare. This baggage is what will give me the edge in a fight. 6.7 / 10 chance of victory

@thenewscenemomuppetjokerfan: Hurts to look at. 4.1 / 10 chance of victory

@themuppetarchives: Also scares me, 0 / 10 chance of survival

@croaker-conspiracies:Mysterious, someone who seems powerful in ways I am unaware of, 3.2 / 10 chance of victory, which will either increase or decrease as I learn more about them.

[gunchhorseman]

GOD

FUCKING

DAMNIT

[gunchhorseman]

The inner workings of Sburb are a mix between code and the essence of storytelling. Code can be broken, exploited, overwritten. I have little interest in being a storyteller, but if I must do so to right a universal wrong, so be it. This may be an old program, but it should still work.

[gunchhorseman]

Garbage, you should do your duty as a housemate and throw it away, cleanliness is important afterall. Maybe then you'll get your blanket privileges back.

Was looking for a snack in the fridge... Does anyone know what this is?

[gunchhorseman]

Currently summoning forth foul forces and iniquitous apparitions to torment @the-muppet-joker and undo the protection spells done by his followers. Hopefully the weird emo people manage to do the rest. Probably going to sleep soon though, the divine may not need rest but those who carry out their retribution sure do.

[gunchhorseman]

:33 < w8 what are you going to do :((

- dream nepeta

Me? Why all I might do is press a button, what happens is really up to Vriska.

Fun fact: Quest beds and assumedly cocoons have roughly the same blast resistance as stone.

[gunchhorseman]

OK HERES MY PLAN TO DEFEAT ALTERNATE VRISKA

@muppetjokerno1haterrr @muppetjokernonbinaryfan @muppetjokernum8ereightfan @muppetjokerfanofextinction @themuppetjokerfrenchfan

[gunchhorseman]

Have you considered violence? >:)

I knew he was a freak;

What I did not know was that his name was Muppet Joker

[barnebucket]

#gunchposting

[gunchhorseman]

The tomes of Whoville have increased my powers over flesh, felt, and the realms in-between. I have crafted a empty vessel to imprison @the-muppet-joker's blasphemous soul in. Behold the inevitable.

[gunchhorseman]

HoNk

perhaps the grave couldn't hold you after all, you always did have a knack for defying fate.

[gunchhorseman]

WW91IGhhdmUgYmVlbiBzZWxlY3RlZCB0aHJvdWdoIGF1dG9tYXRpYyBwYXJzZSBmb3IgInRoZSBicm90aGVyaG9vZCIuIEFyZSB5b3UgZml0IGZvciB0aGUgSy1saW5rIHByb2Nlc3M/

...

[cypher case: base64]

[automatic search query 10:46 pm KLT]

WWVzLg==

[gunchhorseman]

On behalf of all horses I accept your apology.

IM SORRY FOR CALLING ĤORSES STUPID IM SORRY FOR CALLING HORSES STUPID IM SORRY FOR CALLING HORSES STUPID IMSPRRRY FOR CALLING HORSES STUPID IM SOORRY FOR CALLINH HORSES STUPID IM S0RRY FOR CA11ING HORSES STUPID IM SORRY FOR CALLING H0RSES ST00PID IM SORRY FOR CALLING HORSES STUPID IM SORY FOR CALLING ROŔSES STUPID IMNSORY FOR CALLING HORSES STUPID

[gunchhorseman]

::::33 < Sorry if this is how you find out, 8ut the clown is dead. Are you f33ling ok?

- @muppetjokernum8ereightfan

I don't know what to feel. I don't exactly blame Equius, he was just making the best of a shitty situation, there was no realway to win. I know honkfriend wasn't a good person, but I was trying my best to help him. I know the danger of wallowing in hatred and misery, and I knew that he deserved to be happy. Alas, one has to deal with the cards you're dealt I guess...