#had to squeeze this one out after a LONGGGGG time

[socksracoon10]

Not Just A Pirate

Pairing: Will Turner x F!Reader, Jack Sparrow x F!Reader (Platonic) Read the First Part: Pirate

"I swear if I hear you singing one more time, I will see to it that your execution will be the most grotesque, agonizing experience of your entire life," You seethed, teeth barring to see the lovely Jack Sparrow in the cell just across from you. He was on the floor, hands waving around as if composing an orchestra. It had been hours inside the gloomy place and as each second passed, you could feel your sanity slipping away. Jack shifted his neck to face your sitting form, legs sprawled out with your hands clasped around your ears to shut him out. He stopped his incessant humming and sent you a frown,

"Look, love, I say we get used to this. I mean, if we were to die, at least we died tog-" He began before being cut off by the roar of your voice,

"I would rather stick nails into my ears than hear your voice again!" You leaned forward with a scowl.

"Oi, quit it! 'm tryna get some sleep!" Another prisoner from down the hallway bellowed, and you groaned in response as you slumped your head downwards. You glanced up momentarily to see Jack propping his head with an elbow, eyeing you with a look of judgment.

"It's not half as bad as you make it out to be… it could be worse," He scoffed.

"How so?" You sneered with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, you could be stuck with that blacksmith," Jack pointed out, and you threw your hands in the air, immediately getting onto your feet.

"Don't even bother talking to me about him. That insolent, brainless, scummy, disgusting pile of-"

"Woah, woah, woah, now. Have some decorum," Jack snickered, but he instantly winced when he heard you kicking the metal bars of your cell. Pacing back and forth, all you could think about was the events of yesterday. Having been abandoned by Jack, you had finally found the idiot and then minutes later got arrested for piracy… and then of course, whatever stupidity happened at night. You had slept through the whole commotion, and as you best put it for Jack who kept trying to wake you up, you "couldn't be more bothered when death was waiting". Perhaps your outlook on the situation would've been different if you weren't confined in the tiny cell, you couldn't even use the bathroom in peace without having to yell at Jack to turn around.

"You're like my sister!" Jack had cried out, which was followed by,

"Even more a reason to turn your bloody head around!"

A quick nap would clear your mind - and also block out Jack's humming again - and so you laid down against the hay and closed your eyes, trying to tune out any noise at all. You rarely ever slept because dreams were something you feared. Jack had told you before that dreams always revealed your inner desires, but you knew very well that none of your desires could ever match the horrors you were seeing in your head. It was a strange place to be in, and your heart thumped against your chest when you saw the flicker of Davy Jones, his eyes boring into your soul. The connection still made no sense to you, and as you tossed and turned on the makeshift bed, you could feel your arms being tightened by an unknown being, one that intended for you to meet your doom sooner than later.

Waking up with a start, you panted heavily and clutched onto your head, feeling extremely lightheaded. The only that snapped you back to your reality was Jack exclaiming,

"Oh, my pretty princess has finally awoken!"

You grumbled at his words, hating the stupid nickname. It was a running joke at first because you had refused to sleep on the Black Pearl unless certain conditions were met, to which Gibbs had jokingly stated, "The pretty princess wishes for some beauty sleep!" and right then, your fate was solidified on board. You could feel the anger boiling within you and you rolled your eyes,

"Call me that one more time, I dare-" The words fell short when you noticed the man from earlier at the blacksmith's shop standing there with wide eyes. You glanced between him and then Jack, and then back to him before the memories of what had transpired because of him played back in your head. Within seconds, you had begun to claw at the metal of the bars, trying to grab him and bash his skull, "You idiot! You moron! You buffoon!"

Will took a step back, turning to Jack with a confused expression, "Are you sure you need her to get back Miss Swan?"

"Mate, if we don't bring her with us, she'll kill us before we even get to Barbossa," Jack exclaimed, shaking his head as he continued to watch your pathetic attempts at trying to get Will.

Will didn't like to openly ogle at women as much as the other men in Port Royal. He thought it was very rude and an unpleasant experience, nonetheless. He's seen the blacksmith swigging down a bottle of rum, a crude remark escaping his lips only to be met with the firm backhand of a woman walking down the street. He remembered wincing at the scene, quickly averting his eyes to perfect the sword in his hands. The last thing he needed was to get reprimanded for neglecting his work. His eyes, however, could not look at any other being except for you. The image of you towering above his form with a sword pointed just below his chin was forever engraved into his mind. It had been the very moment that he wondered if he could see you once more. His ego wouldn't accept his attraction to you, though, because you were, after all, a pirate. Jack Sparrow's companion, and by the shapes of it, his worst nightmare because you made sure to make his life a miserable hell with any given moment that you two were alone.

"I doubt the princess herself would wish for you to save her," You snorted, shaking your head as you pushed past some men on the streets of Tortuga. Will trailed behind, a frown etched on his features.

"Miss Swann is a childhood friend of mine. Friends will stick together, and considering who you have as company," He paused, jabbing his thumb towards the direction of Sparrow sauntering up to a woman, "I can see you know nothing about having a good friend."

You sneered at him, pausing in your tracks to poke his chest, "Jack is a brother to me, annoying as he is but he's a brother. We've fought many battles together, so it's best if you shut your trap before I cut that tongue of yours."

He smirked at your words, which made your face fall just for a brief second. He wasn't intimidated at all, and the intensity of his gaze made your breath hitch. You almost forgot that you two weren't the only ones in the street before you heard Jack cry out,

"Oi! You two! Enough with the sightseeing, we have a business to attend to!"

You glanced over your shoulder at Will who continued to stare at you, his lips slightly curved upwards. You merely shook your head, convincing yourself that your lack of sleep was getting to you and you scurried off to Jack, deciding to stick by him for the rest of the night.

"Ah, if it isn't the pretty princess!" Gibbs cheered as you entered the tavern. You groaned, rolling your eyes, especially since you could faintly hear Will snicker in the background. You shot him a quick glare before turning back to Gibbs,

"Alright, cut it out. Not funny," You hissed, seating yourself next to Jack as he began to ramble about the mission at hand. Against your own will, you shifted in your seat to get a better look at Will who was standing in the corner, observing his surroundings. Being around so many pirates was probably an overwhelming experience for him. Aside from that, you knew his stance on piracy; hell, it was the reason you were in that prison cell in the first place. You snuck off to where he stood, offering him a jug of rum but he politely declined, assuring you that the last thing he wanted to do was get wasted, especially when he had more prominent things on his mind.

"Like what?" You asked, taking a sip of the drink.

"Like how someone like you could possibly be a pirate," He responded with no hesitation. Your eyes widened, the rum still cascading into your mouth as you tried to come up with something snarky in response. What ever did he mean by that?

"You saying I'm incompetent to be a pirate?" You scoffed, noticing the way his brows furrowed,

"No. I say you have every skill, even more than Jack-"

"Don't insult Jack, you haven't seen his potential," You wagged your finger at him, "You don't know anything about him."

"I don't know anything about you either, but judging by what I've seen in the past few days, it's very clear to me."

"Yeah, what's clear?"

"You…" He paused for a moment before continuing, "You are the only good thing piracy has to offer."

"I thought you said you hate pirates," Your voice had gotten quieter, unsure if you wanted to continue this conversation or not. You had gotten so used to starting fights, looting, and arguing with almost everyone that hearing words like this made your head spin.

"I did. I hate most pirates… not all, though," Will responded, finally taking your cup to take a large gulp of the rum. He smiled at you, one that made your knees a little weak and made your heart flutter a bit more. He stepped out of the tavern, sending you one final glance for the night before leaving you alone to your thoughts. You looked down at the rum in your hands, admiring the way the liquid swashed around in the jug.

It was half full and you smiled to yourself.

[watermel1]

fluffy headbands

featuring: kageyama tobio

warnings: none, fluffy, cheesy ?

kageyama tobio x g/n reader

a/n: this is a headcanon I came up with that I anonymously sent in another author’s inbox. I don’t remember who that author was so if you’re reading this, hi :). I’ve had this draft for a longgggg time so I’m glad I’m finally posting it. hope you like it

original headcanon:

when you began getting comfortable dating, you would push his hair up to kiss his forehead whenever you wanted to show him affection. now he has a pack of headbands he bought himself and puts one on and stares at you expectantly whenever he wants your attention 😭💕

masterlist

kageyama tobio was not used to feeling like this. at least, not until he met you.

you with your soft smiles and encouraging eyes. you who never pressured him into anything he wasn’t ready to do. you who beamed when he grabbed your hand of his own accord for the first time. you who always knew when he needed your affection. sometimes though, it took you a little longer to pick up on it than he was willing to wait.

kageyama wasn’t good with words which is why your ability to read him was so beneficial to your relationship. when the two of you first got comfortable together, you stared at him until he nervously asked what was wrong. “can I kiss your forehead?”

he blinked before nodding with red cheeks, watching as you pushed his hair up and pressed a soft kiss to the center of his forehead. you pulled back with a grin, combing his hair back in place as he stared at you with a lovestruck expression, “again, please.”

with a laugh, you kissed it again, over and over as he asked every time you pulled away.

it wasn’t until after the first few instances of out-of-character behavior that you began to notice a pattern. every once in a while, you’d drag him with you to the bathroom. you would sit on the counter with his body slotted between your legs as you roped him into your skincare. the first time you tried it, you insisted on wearing matching headbands to hold back his bangs. the cute, furry bow made you giggle as he huffed loudly, eyes rolling and hands squeezing your hips gently. you decided to compensate for the slight embarrassment by covering his forehead in kisses, his face flushing as he lowered his chin for you to continue.

ever since then, this small step became part of the ritual. right before skincare, you’d slide his headband in place and his head would automatically lean down for you to pepper kisses on him again and again.

one day, you walked in to your shared apartment to find tobio sitting on the couch wearing one of the fluffy headbands you kept in the bathroom and looking at you almost expectedly. you giggled upon seeing him and immediately sped across the room to cup his cheeks, “what’s up with the headband, baby?”

he subconsciously nestled his face into your hands, “it’s easier to wash my face this way.”

you let out a hum of acknowledgement as you began covering his forehead in kisses. it was instinctual. how were you NOT supposed to kiss the part of him that was always covered the few times it became exposed?

this thought crossed your mind every time you came home to the sight of him gazing at you from across the room, waiting. the instances were always days apart so it wasn’t until he got a little too comfortable and wore it two days in a row that it clicked for you.

you shifted from your position on his lap, leaning back in your straddle to analyze his face. “tobio…” you started, suspiciously, “are you wearing these headbands on purpose?”

his eyes widened and his mouth opened and closed as a surprised, strangled sound came from his throat. with a wide grin, you brought his face to your lips once again, “that’s..” kiss, “so…” another kiss, “cute!”

his face heated up under your palms as he shook his head, refusing to look up at you. you continued your gentle assault on every inch of his bare skin until the heat radiating from him slowly dissipated and he sighed. you decided not to mention it again, opting to never bring up his shame. knowing tobio, he would want to burn every headband in the apartment and never speak of this again.

or so you thought. when you opened the door after work the next day, you found your boyfriend sitting on the couch with it on. his face was red, but he couldn’t hide his small smile as you ran towards him giggling.

thank you for reading <3

[saifyee]

Hurtcember 2024 || Day 1 - Collapse || @hurtcember

|| Nagito Komaeda centered | Nagito x Gundham JUST A LITTLE but tbh it can be interpreted as romantic or platonic !

Genre: drabble, hurt/comfort ?

CW/TW: Fever, Exhaustion, Self-Depreciation, Sleep Deprivation

Summary: Nagito over works himself too much and hadn't been taking proper care of himself. After getting a fever, he's taken to the infirmary.

A/N: I've never posted any of my work before, nor do I ever really finish anything, so this is pretty nerve wracking for me! This is my first time writing Danganronpa but my hyperfixation is too powerful for me to think of doing anything else at the moment. I'm also not great at tagging works, since I've never posted my writing, BUT I THINK I GOT IT DOWN DECENTLY ENOUGH 🤔

The dim ceiling lights felt harsher than normal as Nagito's feet dragged against the hard tile flooring. He covers his mouth with a hand covered sleeve as he yawns, not yet having shaken off the drowsiness from waking up a mere twenty minutes ago.

To be completely fair, he had hardly slept to begin with. If he was lucky, he got maybe just under three hours of sleep at the very most. Well.. He is lucky, allegedly, so that's the answer he's going to give if anyone were to ask.

Not like anyone would though.. Who cares about useless trash like him anyways?

The milky-haired man chuckles to himself at the thought before pushing it to the back of his mind, letting it rot there instead.

He rubs at his eyes in an attempt to shoo the tiredness from them yet upon pulling his fingers away, he's met with spots in his vision that weren't there previously. Surely this is nothing, right? He must've just rubbed his eyes a little too hard, it'll go away soon.

That's what he thought.

And yet.. The closer he got to his classroom, the worse his condition was getting. By the time he made it to the sliding door, he could hardly navigate where the handle was to open it.

Everything was blurred, black spots splattering across his vision as though someone had poured ink into his eyes. Despite the fact that they were now entering the colder months of the year, and there was always a chilly draft that made itself known throughout the building, a burning fire prickled at his skin.

With a shaky hand, he finally manages to slide the wooden door open. With the next step he takes, his foot doesn't catch his body.

He can hardly process what's happening, much too out of it to even attempt to save himself from meeting the cold hard tile.

Maybe I really overdid it this time..

That's his last thought as he surrenders, squeezing his eyes shut and waiting for the harsh impact that was sure to knock him out.

Except.. It didn't come.

"Nagito, are you okay?!"

"Did this guy pull an all-nighter or something?? The hell is wrong with him?"

"Are you idiots really that surprised that a ghostly creep like him is on the verge of death? I thought he would've died a longgggg time ago!"

"He is not dying! Do not be mean to our fellow classmate, Hiyoko!"

"Mikan, you're the Ultimate Nurse. Come here and help me with him."

The familiar voices boom from various places around the classroom, and yet Nagito can't point out a single one. With the little strength that he has, he cracks open his heavy eyes. Although the overhead lights of the classroom nearly blind his sensitive eyes, he's able to make out that the person in his sight was none other than Peko Pekoyama.

It was no surprise that she'd be able to get to him before he could fall to the floor. Why would she jump at the chance to help someone like him though? He doesn't deserve that type of kindness..

"R-Right!!" A timid voice cuts in, one that he can recognize to be Mikan's.

With gentle fingers, she's brushing the fluffy hair from Nagito's face before pressing the back of her hand to his forehead. It was so cold in comparison, he found it to be rather soothing.

"Well?"

"H-He has a fever! We need t-t-to get him to the infirmary r-right away," the nurse stutters out as she presses two fingers to his neck.

"I see.. Gundham, can you take him?"

Gundham? It's true that he's strong enough for the task but there's no way that he'd step anywhere close to Nagito..

"Why am I being entrusted to such a task? I cannot carry him, that is physically impossible for my flesh is poisoned. If I were to carry him, he would die in mere seconds," he replies, although nobody is convinced by those words.

"Boohoooo, stop being a pussyyyyy and carry him!! Nobody else wants his weirdo germs all over them!"

"I am no such thing! I am Gundham Tanaka, The Supreme Overlord of Ice! As a mere human, he will die if I carry him. I am simply stating facts."

"Gundham Tanaka, you will carry him. Mikan, go with them," Peko states, leaving no room for further argument.

"I-" Gundham pauses, sighing loud enough to ensure that everyone knows how much he dislikes this idea. "Fine, so be it. If you wish for this fragile human to die then I have no choice but to carry out this mission."

"Ooooooo, wowieeeee!! Are you gonna have to carry him bridal styleeee?" Ibuki butts in, her words as suggestive as they always are.

Heavy footsteps grow closer to Nagito, stopping once it sounds like they are right next to his head.

"What other choice do I have? It is clear that he has a curse in which makes him too weak for me to carry him any other way. If you take this the wrong way then I will kill you."

"Enough.. Here, take him. I trust that you won't drop him like a certain someone."

"Heyyyyy!! I wouldn't drop him! I'm really muscular, I'll have you know," Kazuichi responds, taking the jab to heart.

The arguing that follows is tuned out as Nagito drifts between the lines of consciousness, all of his remaining focus being on the arms that scoop up his shivering body.

It was.. Weird. He hasn't been held like this is years.. The body heat against his own was irritating but oddly comforting. Perhaps if his body wasn't overheating, he'd be able to enjoy this more.

"Having such a harmful curse on you is no laughing matter, human," a deep voice cuts through his daze.

Was he really laughing? He hadn't even noticed..

Although he wanted to give a proper reply, all he could muster up was incomprehensible mumbles. The feverish man then snuggles closer to the source of heat, drifting off to sleep in the tensed up arms that were holding him.

☆࿐ཽ༵༆༒ ◯ ༒༆࿐ཽ༵☆

Harsh lights greet Nagito as he struggles to open his eyes, which remain heavy even after having fallen asleep. He waits for them to adjust but the most the stormy orbs can manage is a foggy view.

A groan falls from his lips as he tries to sit up, much too weak to do so on his own. He felt hot all over and every muscle in his body was achy and sore.

His head presses back into the stiff pillow, cloudy eyes scanning whatever they could as he tries to figure out where he is. It doesn't take long, he's been here more times than he can count.

Oh, right. Gundham and Mikan had taken him to the infirmary.

"Oh!! Y-You're finally awake! Uhm.. How are you f-feeling?" Mikan approaches the side of the bed, her timid voice hushed so as to not overwhelm him.

The milky-haired man furrows his brows, really taking into consideration how he's actually feeling. "Mmm... I feel hot and tired.. And my body is achingggg," he mutters out, a lazy smile pulling at his chapped lips.

"That's normal f-for a fever! Uhm.. If you don't mind, I'm going t-to keep you here.. J-Just until your fever eases up! It's.. It's not safe for y-you to go home with these symptoms."

Not safe..? It's true that his condition is poor but surely he would be able to walk home just fine, right? He made it to school with little issues..

That's just my luck..

"Okay, that's fine by me. You're the Ultimate Nurse so you know best." Nagito's words come out more as strangled whispers but he can only assume that Mikan hears him based on pinks that cascade across her cheeks.

It's probably nice to have such a useful talent.. To be needed and depended on. He could only wish to have a talent that's half as amazing as hers.

Maybe in his next life he will be granted a talent that will spread hope to all in such a meaningful manner.. That's pretty doubtful but he can hope for an outcome like that.

While Mikan scrambles to piece together a response to the feverish man's compliment, the one who carried Nagito to the infirmary makes a reappearance. Although unintentional, he nearly scares the purple-haired girl to death.

"I am back from my mission.. Oh, the cursed one has finally awoken," he says, shifting his attention from Mikan to Nagito. "I have brought you a multitude of things that will aid in lifting the curse that has been placed upon your fragile body."

If Nagito had to guess what that meant, he could only assume that Gundham is referring to the food and drink that he had in his hands. From what his clouded eyes could make out, that's all that he could see..

"Do you mean the uhh-"

"Precisely. Now take this and allow it to combat your curse. If you do not, the curse will only continue to consume you until you are nothing but a lifeless corpse," he urges, sitting down in the chair beside the bed before putting the food and drink in Nagito's lap.

He doubts that it's that severe, especially given his luck, but he hasn't eaten since sometime last night so he supposes he should get something in his system.

"Thank you, Gundham. That's so kind of you," the white-haired man exhales. Although slowly, he's able to get his body up into a sitting position with the assistance of Mikan. "Thanks, Mikan. I.. Appreciate all that you're doing for someone like me."

"I-It's nothing!! I'm just doing my job, after all!" She waves her hands in front of her face, her pink cheeks flushing themselves a darker shade.

It's with shaky hands and a little struggle that Nagito is able to get something in his system. Gundham was right though, food alone had him feeling a little better. Fortunately enough, per Mikan's words after checking his temperature, it had managed to lessen a little bit.

This was a good sign, surely.

"Your energy is less tainted by fog now, human. It is not enough though, even though I had taken it upon myself to cast incantations on your food," Gundham comments, heterochromatic eyes darting around his figure as if to analyze him.

Nagito's eyebrows knit at the claim, sending a questioning look in Gundham's direction. "Incantations, you say? Then surely I'll get better in no time. I'm already doing a lot better, thanks to you and Mikan."

"No! It is not enough. A human such as yourself would not understand the things that I can see.. That alone is not going to stop this curse," he replies with confidence, although his expression shows that of a conflict. After a moment of silence, he reaches out his hands. "Grant me your hands. I must do all that is necessary to lift this curse."

"Oh uhm.. Alright then, whatever you say! You're the uhh.. Supreme Overlord of Ice so I trust your judgement," Nagito replies, obediently reaching his hands out for the other man to take them into his own.

He doesn't know if it's his fever making him delusional or if his sight is being kind to him, but he could see the other man's cheeks starting to turn a soft shade of pink. Did Gundham like it when people played along with his act?

Did Gundham even think it was an act..? Probably not. Well it's not like Nagito is going to rain on his parade.

The other man hums lowly as he encases Nagito's hands with his own, his eyes closing in concentration. After a few moments of quiet, he exhales a long breath. "Mmm, yes, I see.. This is very unfortunate."

"Uhm-"

"Patience, cursed one! You will speak when I allow you to."

Nagito couldn't find it in himself to retort or question him, so he keeps his mouth shut for now.

"It.. Would appear that you have multiple curses casted upon this body of yours. This one can be removed. As for the other one, there is nothing even I can do about that."

Nagito's eyes widen at the statement, lips parted in a silent gasp. A curse that can't be removed? Although he wanted to boil all of this down to being part of the character that Gundham plays, he doesn't know if that's something he can do anymore after hearing that.

A curse that can't be removed..

It's too familiar.

Gundham's eyes snap open, an intense gaze meeting Nagito's own. "You have been living with this one for a very long time. I can only assume that you were born with it."

Before Nagito could even think, words were spilling past his parted lips. "That's right. Isn't that pathetic? The Ultimate Lucky Student being born with a curse that's irreversible. Being lucky in itself is a curse if it's anything like my luck." Although the words are sour leaving his mouth, the faint smile on his lips contradicts them.

Gundham's lips flatten into a straight line, conflict flickering behind his eyes. It's not often that he gets stumped like this.. Nagito's words must have had some type of an effect on him.

The other man's eyes fall downward, breaking the intense eye contact that they had been sharing. Warmth spreads across Nagito's knuckles as a thumb brushes over them, gentle in comparison to what people would expect from Gundham.

"I do not believe for that to be pathetic. You, a mere human, were born with such a terrible curse and yet here you lie, alive and fighting. You are quite strong, on the contrary to what your beliefs about your own being are," Gundham eventually answers, his voice holding a much softer tone than what Nagito is accustomed to.

"Thank you.. I'm not deserving of such kindness," Nagito breathes out, this time giving the other man a genuine smile.

"It is simply the truth, nothing more. Now, lie down. There is still a task at hand that I must complete. I do not wish for this curse to grow stronger once again." Gundham changes the topic, pulling his hands away from Nagito's and letting them drop on the bed.

"Haha, right! I nearly forgot about the other one until you said something." Nagito shifts himself slowly on the bed until he's lying back down, exhaustion traveling up his spine the moment he's flat against the mattress.

Gundham hums in reply, bringing both of his hands out to hover them over the white-haired male's form. "Close your eyes and do not open them until I tell you to. I do not see this taking awhile but your body is a stubborn one.."

Nagito can definitely believe that.. His body is anything but obedient. He does as told and allows his eyes to flutter closed, his eyelids feeling much too heavy for him to even think about opening them again during Gundham's ministrations.

A minute at most passes by of utter silence, the only noises to be heard being the sounds of breathing and fabric rubbing against each other as Gundham does what he deems necessary. Although this wasn't part of the instructions that were given to him, Nagito finds himself drifting off to sleep, much too exhausted to fight it off.

[curio-collective-official]

so i'm just going to answer this with my current main dr (obey me) so be ready

i confessed first. it was about a year into living at the house of lamentation (i am not the human exchange student, gave that role to my favorite scottish person ezra) and i was having tea with lucifer. i ended up telling him and he explained that he reciprocated my feelings, then he kissed me @//////@

so. my s/o is from obey me! shall we date? and i actually fell in love with him back when i first discovered azeru official. LONGGGGG ass story.

my pet names for him are luci, darling, sweetheart, and my love, and his for me are angel (because. because i am one), my dove/my little dove, and pretty boy

so we've always had romantic/sexual tension since i went to the devildom (i was not exiled i came there by choice), and when we met and we made eye contact for the first time, there was obviously something there.

i show all of the love languages, mostly physical touch, acts of service and quality time. i like going on little outings and discreetly holding his hand--and also preening his wings. he gives me gifts and says words of affirmation on my lowest days, but primarily quality time as well. tea tastings are peak

for some reason pink pony club makes me think of him, as well as it's my party from obey me (obviously), but mostly classical music makes my thoughts fill with my beautiful boy

so i taught him my specific cursive method and the conlang ender (⏃⏚☊) so we can write secret notes to each other, and he taught me an effective shorthand method

settling down after rad and taking some time to ourselves

going out to a nice, inexpensive dinner, then coming home and cuddling

lucifer from obey me! i wish i could send photos but i'm on my computer atm, i'll edit with photos tomorrow ^^

UGH OML YES. so i'm really excited to have one of those cozy devildom nights with him. we preen each others' wings and snuggle while drinking tea. PEAK

yes. so i was drunk off my ASS and was trying to be all romantic and shit, but my adhd was very stereotypical that night, so i was like "i fucking love you, baby, you're so...is that a rubber duck?" and we both just started LAUGHING before he took me to bed and kissed my forehead

when at rad we're very discreet, but sometimes he squeezes my arm to reassure me. but we like studying together a lot. it's a nice activity, and afterwards he strokes my wings until my head goes empty >//////<

again i'll update this when i can

basically. freshwater from b&bw but better and less horrific on the sinuses

i told belphie first. he was a *bit* jealous that i chose luci over him but he's fine now, usually too asleep to care LMFAO

⪩⪨﹐ᴅʀ ꜱ/ᴏ ᴀꜱᴋ ɢᴀᴍᴇ ⁞ ˎˊ˗

shifting ask game focused on you and your dr s/o reblog for asks ↻ ‧₊˚.

💌 — who confessed first and how did it happen?

🪽 — what is your s/o from? (made-up, media, book, movie etc…) and why did you feel drawn to them?

💄 — what are petnames you have for eachother?

🥂 — how did you two met and how did you relationship progress?

🤍 — what are your love languages VS. your s/o’s? How do you show theirs and how do they show yours?

💍 — what are some songs that makes you think of them?

🌹 — what is something you have taught your s/o (or will teach) and what is something they have taught you?

🦢 — what do you see in the future for you and your s/o?

👠 — what is your ideal date night with your s/o?

🗒 — who is your s/o and what are some photos you really like of them?

💋 — what are you most excited to experience with your s/o and why?

🍒 — do you have any inside jokes with your s/o or funny scenarios?

🍷 — what do your s/o and you like to do together?

🪞 — what are some photos that depict your relationship with your s/o?

❤️‍🩹 — what does your s/o smell like?

💭 — who was the first person you told after getting with your s/o?

divider credits : [ Cherries & Bust ] [ Lace & Bows ]

[gamergirl929]

Your Secret Is Safe With Me (Charlotte Flair x Reader)

After revealing her secret to Charlotte Flair, what’s in store for Raw’s newest commentator? Will the relationship between Charlotte and her be effected, or take a step towards something even more?  

The long awaited sequel to The Commentator’s Secret is here! 

Part one can be found HEREEEEE: The Commentator’s Secret

This is a G!P fic, if you’re not a fan, I suggest you skip. 

ALSO WARNING SMUT BELOW!

Charlotte Flair knowing about your secret was the best thing that could’ve ever happened to you.  

You were free.  

Free to be yourself around her, even more so than you were before she found out your secret.  

“Hey.”  

Your eyes widen when Charlotte nudges you, pulling you out of your trance.  

“You look a little deep in thought.” She smiles as she gives you another playful nudge.  

You shrug.  

“Just thinking about y... Ummm...” You clear your throat, your cheeks flushing pink.

Charlotte chuckles as she turns towards you, the woman leaning in, so close in fact that her hot breath tickles the flesh of your ear.  

“Now you have to tell me.” She whispers and you swallow hard, your tongue swiping at your lips.  

With your secret out, the relationship between the two of you had changed, changed into something more.  

Though that something more hadn’t included anything intimate, of course, other than Charlotte’s flirting and maybe a kiss here or there.  

Charlotte had treated you in a way you never expected, and then some.

“I lost you again.” Charlotte smiles and you sigh.

“Just thinking about…”  

You shrug.  

“Things?”

Charlotte giggles.

“Are you going to tell me these, ‘things?’”

You hum, glancing around before you lean towards Charlotte, your lips intentionally brushing her ear lobe.  

“Nope.” You laugh, Charlotte smacking you in the chest playfully seconds later.  

“You ass.”  

You shrug.  

“One of my MANY qualities.”

Your eyes widen when Charlotte’s hand slides onto your thigh, giving it a squeeze.  

“I’m sure you’ll tell me eventually.” She smirks and your eyes widening, the glint in her eye making you shiver.  

Charlotte’s hand slides off your thigh, fingers teasingly dragging along the inner seam of your pants before she slides off the crate the two of you were sitting on. 

“You better get ready, Monday Night Raw won’t be the same without its newest commentator.” She winks and you roll your eyes cheeks flushing pink.  

“Yeah, yeah, and Monday Night Raw would be nothing without its Queen.”  

                                                           ***

Monday Night Raw was NOTHING without a little Flair, and everyone knew that. 

Everyone ALSO knew that Raw was a place that wouldn’t be the same without you, you’d quickly rose to the top, immediately becoming a favorite amongst the WWE Universe and you couldn’t be happier.  

It wasn’t just that though.  

Charlotte Flair made YOU happy, so much so that you wanted to take a leap of faith, possibly asking her out to dinner, but you were nervous, incredibly nervous.  

You weren’t even sure WHAT the two of you were, asking her on a date made it official.  

What if she’d just pitied you?  

What if she’d only been with you because she felt bad for you?  

“Alright, what is it?”  

You pick your head up, brows furrowing when you see Charlotte making her way towards you.  

Charlotte huffs, glancing around before she grabs your wrist and drags you into her dressing room, giving the two of you some much needed privacy.  

“What?” You ask innocently and Charlotte sighs.  

Your eyes nearly bug out of your head when she guides you backwards into a nearby chair, the woman straddling your waist.  

“Wh-Whoa-I'm s-sorry...” You panic, the woman cupping your cheeks, her touch calming you immediately.  

“Hey, it’s just me...” She whispers, the woman’s soft green orbs making your racing heart calm.  

“Now, talk to me...” She whispers, the statement more of a demand than a question.  

Your mouth opens and closes a few times, but the feel of her hands on your cheeks, and the feel of her body resting in your lap aids you in summoning your courage.

“Do you uhh...” You swallow hard, your eyes fluttering shut as you curtly nod to yourself. 

“Do you want to go on a date... W-W-With... Me?” You ask, Charlotte’s eyes widening.  

You’re about to back pedal when Charlotte’s lips split into a grin, the woman leaning in, pecking the tip of your nose.  

“I’d love to.”  

                                                           ***

One date turned into two, and those two ended up with you and Charlotte snuggled up in your hotel room.  

The two of you had yet to be intimate, the after-dinner snuggling leading to absolutely nothing between the two of you, both simply wanting to be together.  

You could no longer deny the fact that you’d fallen in love with Charlotte Flair and you could only hope that she felt the same about you.

“I can hear you thinking.”  

You jump, eyes widening when Charlotte rolls over, propping herself up on her elbow, the woman eyeing you intently.

“I…” You swallow hard, shrugging before you turn away.

Charlotte shakes her head, cupping your cheek so she can turn you back towards her.

“What’s on your mind?”

The blonde can only grin when you lean into her touch, your eyes fluttering shut.

“I really, really like you and I just want to know if you feel the same…” You whisper, so soft Charlotte has to strain her ears to hear.

Unbeknownst to you, Charlotte is beaming, the woman’s heart racing in her chest.  

You inhale sharply when she climbs on top of you, sitting in your lap as she cups both of your cheeks.  

Your eyes widen when green orbs drop to your lips, the woman smiling as she leans in.  

Your eyes flutter shut as your lips meet, her lips just as soft as the first time she kissed you, sending a shiver down your spine as your palms settle on her back.  

Charlotte pulls back only to change the angle of the kiss before your lips are meeting again, your hands slipping into her shirt, palms settling on her back as you get lost in the kiss.  

It’s when you feel Charlotte’s tongue swiping at your bottom lip that you know this kiss means far more than the others you’d shared before.  

Your lips part, allowing the pink organ to invade your mouth, flicking against your own, a groan rumbling in your chest.  

Charlotte gasps, your tongue slipping into her mouth, surrounded by wet, soft heat, your tongue flicking against the roof of her mouth.  

Lithe fingers tangle in the soft hair at the base of your neck, a hum crawling up your throat.  

The hotel room is filled with the sounds of you ragged breathing, the sound of your lips meeting over and over again, soft sighs and moans tumbling from both of your mouths.  

You groan loudly, the two of you abruptly pulling apart, wide dark eyes locking.  

You unconsciously shift, the woman in your lap gasping as the hard appendage between your legs rubs against the apex between her thighs.  

“Sh-Shit... I’m s- UGH!” You’re cut off by a groan when Charlotte rolls her hips, dragging her sex against the bulge in your pants.  

If you were being honest it had been a LONGGGGG time since you came with the help of someone else, you’d done EVERYTHING to keep your not so little friend a secret.  

And that meant remaining abstinent. 

Charlotte cups your cheeks, leaning in to rest her forehead against yours, your lips brushing.  

“Do you want me to stop...?” She whispers, her green orbs darting around your face.  

Your darkened Y/E/C orbs lock with her equally dark greens, filled with lust and a glint of something you can’t quite place.  

It’s not pity.  

It’s not disgust.  

And THAT, is what pushes you to shake your head, leaning in to press a soft kiss to her lips.  

“Don’t stop.” You whisper, a smirk stretching across Charlotte’s face as she slides her arms around your neck, her fingers tangling in the baby hairs at the base of your neck.  

“If you want me to, just let me know, okay?” She whispers.  

You answer, not with your words, but with your hips, giving them a rock.  

Charlotte inhales sharply, lips parting as she moans in pleasure. Her hips start to move and you groan, eyes slamming shut as you rest your forehead against hers.  

The two of you fall into rhythm rather quickly, hips rocking JUST right, so much so that you feel your release ALREADY creeping up on you.  

Your rapid breathing and the look on your face queuing Charlotte in, the blonde’s tongue swiping at her lips as she swivels her hips.  

“Oh God...” You sigh, a wrinkle forming between your brows.  

Your release comes as a surprise, your body stiffening before your body quakes, the woman in your lap watching you intently as you cum beneath her, a visible damp spot on your sweats.  

Your cheeks flush as Charlotte ducks down, pressing tender kisses to the curve of your jaw.  

“S-Sorry , I-

Charlotte silences you with a fingertip to your lips, those same fingers gliding gently down your cheek.  

“You have nothing to apologize for.”  

You pant, your eyes darting around Charlotte’s face for a moment before you smirk.  

“What’s-

Charlotte lets out a squeak when you flip your positions, the blonde now beneath you.  

The woman arches a perfect brow, a smirk stretching across her face as you lean in, your lips meeting hers.  

You give your hips a test roll, gauging Charlotte’s reaction, which in this case in a moan, the woman’s brows furrowing as your still hard cock brushes against her JUST right.  

Charlotte’s arms slip beneath yours, her hands sliding up the back of your shirt as you roll your hips, quickly setting a pace.

The blonde’s lips part, her breath hitching as you roll your hips with more force, the headboard behind her tapping the wall.  

Charlotte was close before, but now she was moments from tumbling over the edge, the hard appendage between your leg rubbing the little bundle of nerves between the apex of her thighs perfectly.  

Meanwhile on top of her, your jaw is clenched, a bead of sweat running down your face.  

You were throbbing, absolutely throbbing, wanting nothing more than to cum again, but all that mattered right now was Charlotte.  

The aforementioned blonde lets out a high pitched when your cock twitches between her legs, the woman knowing full well that you were about to cum yet again.  

She wraps her legs around your middle, the woman crying out when you swivel your hips.  

You grit your teeth, staving off your release, something Charlotte realizes when her dark green orbs flutter open.  

“Don’t hold back.” She whispers, your eyes flashing open and locking with hers.  

“B-B-But... Y-You...” You start, gasping when Charlotte pulls you down into a kiss.  

Charlotte’s walls clench around nothing, the woman’s clit throbbing, signaling to her that she’s literally moments from falling over the edge.  

You groan when Charlotte uses her feet to aid you in your rocking, your dick rubbing her harder with each roll.  

Charlotte’s lips part, a sound unlike any you’d ever heard leaving her mouth as she stiffens.  

You watch with wide eyes as the woman shivers, a crinkle formed between her brows. Her eyes roll in the back of her head as she cries out, the feel of her shaking wildly beneath you pushing you over the edge.  

A throaty groan crawls up your throat as you quake and collapse on top of the blonde who chuckles in your ear, panting all the while.  

Her lips split into a grin as she turns her head, kissing your temple.  

“Does that answer your question?” She whispers and your brows furrow.  

You push yourself up on your palms, looking down at the woman questioningly.  

She giggles.  

“Forget?” She teases and you grin apologetically.  

“Maybe...?” You pant, resting back down on top of her, sure not to drop your entire weight onto her.  

Charlotte turns her head, her lips brushing your ear as her fingers tangle in the lightly sweaty hair at the base of your neck.  

“I feel the same.” She whispers, your eyes widening as you abruptly pull back to look into her eyes.  

Your eyes search her face intently, a lump forming in your throat when you find no hint of hesitation in her eyes.  

“Y-You...”  

Charlotte cups your cheeks, the woman pulling you into a kiss.  

“I feel the same.” She whispers again, kissing your lips again and again until you pull back with a grin, tears in your eyes.  

“Will you...” You swallow hard, Charlotte’s grin nearly splitting her face in half.  

“Will...” You start again and she giggles, surprising you when she rolls the two of you over, the blonde now on top of you.  

“Will I what?” She asks teasingly and you smile.  

“Will you be my girlfriend...?” You whisper nervously, the blonde giggling as she ducks down, her lips meeting yours in a gentle kiss.  

“I thought you’d never ask.”

[unfreakable]

The Arrangement, Part XIV/// Draco Malfoy x Reader

SUMMARY: The end.

WORD COUNT: 1,898

WARNING(S): nothing 

A/N: welp we’ve come a long way and here it finally is.

SERIES MASTERLIST | PLAYLIST

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

You hadn’t slept at all, not that it mattered. Tonight was supposed to be your engagement party. Supposed to be.

You hadn’t talked to your fiancé since Monday and you weren’t expecting him to start calling you today. You knew the party was off but you thought the engagement might still have some hope. But even that was wishful thinking.

You sat on one of the armchairs in your living room when you got tired of rolling around in your bed. The sun was coming up. You felt like you’d been awake much longer than you actually had. The seconds turned to minute. Minutes to hours. Hours to eternities. But still you didn’t feel tired.

You wondered if Draco was sleeping easily or if he were staring at the same sunrise. You tore your eyes away from the window and looked down at the coffee table. There was an invitation to the party. You almost laughed as you picked it up.

Narcissa has specially designed them. A white card with a nice black font detailing the time, place, and occasion. Maybe she had been more excited than either of you about the news. You couldn’t imagine how disappointed she was now.

-

Draco hadn’t slept. He didn’t like sleeping alone anymore, which was apart of the trouble of falling in love. It made loneliness harder.

He’d laid in bed until the first hints of sunlight came through his window. Then he drifted out of his room, out of his wing, and through the halls. When he reached the ballroom, he was surprised to see house elf’s already busy at work. It was barely 7 am and they were already running around sweeping and dusting.

He walked through the ballroom, getting assorted greeting and congratulations that he absentmindedly replied to. When he reached the other side of the room, he threw the doors to the balcony open, basking the room in the gold light of sunrise.

He stepped onto the balcony, breathing in the fresh air. But it didn’t do anything to clear his mind. This entire week all he could think about was you. And now he was standing on the balcony where you had once kissed him on the cheek. Giving him only enough satisfaction to make him miss you when you were gone.

That must’ve all been planned. He gripped the edge of the balcony until his knuckles turned white. He didn’t even hear his mother coming up behind him until she squealed into his ear.

“Good morning!” He turned around to look at her, flashing a lazy smile. “It’s engagement party day! Oh, I’m so excited.”

When Draco didn’t reply, her smile faded. “What’s wrong dear?” She reaches up to cup his cheek and he leaned into the touch. “You look like you haven’t slept.”

“Yeah, I uh...didn’t get much sleep last night.” He couldn’t pretend to smile anymore, so he turned around. Leaning against the railing he could see the entire expanse of neatly trimmed lawn.

“I’m sure it’s just excitement, right?” Her hand ran up and down his back comfortingly.

“Sure.”

“When can I expect (Y/N)?”

“ ‘M not sure.”

Narcissa studies his face for a moment, there was something lurking behind his eyes but he shifted them in the other direction before she could recognize it. For once, she decided against prying.

“Well, let me know when she gets here.” He nodded. He didn’t turn around until he heard the click of her heels coming from the ballroom.

He was glad to finally be alone again.

-

You laid around the house for a few more hours, trying to take your mind off what was supposed to take place that afternoon. You never thought you’d be so disappointed to miss a party at Malfoy manor. Finally, at a quarter past one, you dragged yourself into the kitchen to make some coffee.

Halfway through brewing the coffee, your phone rang. You lazily picked it up without checking to see who it was because you didn’t think it mattered.

“Hello—”

“Where are you? My mum’s running around here like she’s mad. It’s giving me a headache, someone needs to come talk some sense into her.”

“Draco, I...” You stopped mid-sentence, not really knowing what else to say. “I...” You tried again to compose a sentence but nothing came.

You took a deep breath and tried to focus on composing your thoughts. “Draco, I didn’t know...today was still happening.”

There was a pause on the other end of the line. “Can you just get here.” He sounded angry or at the very least annoyed. You heard him take a deep breath. “Please,” he added calmly.

“Of course.”

“Thanks.” And before you could reply, he had already hung up. You sat your phone down and took a deep breath. You only allowed yourself a moment to process before you abandoned your still-brewing coffee and gotta ready as quickly as you could.

-

You could hear Narcissa screaming, probably at some poor house-elf, as she made her way down the hallway to unlock the door. You couldn’t quite make out the words she was saying, but you could tell it wasn’t good. You only caught the end of her sentence as she threw the door open.

“—and I want that done now!” When she was finally finished shouting, she turned to look at you. For a moment she looked exhausted and annoyed, then she noticed it was you and her face lit up with a smile. “(Y/N)! Thank Merlin you’re finally here, I was beginning to think you’d got cold feet.” She took a step back so you could walk through the doorway and beckoned you forward.

She closed the door behind you and put her hand on your shoulder, which made you stiffen slightly. “I’m so glad you’re here. Sorry about the yelling, today’s been really hectic, you know. Just trying to pull everything together last minute.” She let out a bit of shrill laughter. “And Draco’s been stuck in his room all day. I hope you’ll make sure he’s dressed and out of his room in time.”

“Of course.” She gave your shoulder a squeeze then she was off, heels clicking down the hallway as she started calling the names of whatever house-elf she needed.

Finding the way to Draco’s wing would’ve once been a struggle, but now you got there with no difficulty. You stood outside his door, trying to slow your breathing. Finally, you raised your hand and knocked. The sound seemed much louder in your head than it probably was.

“Come in.” His voice was faint from inside the room. You opened the door and slowly walked in. Draco has his back to you as he stood in the mirror buttoning his shirt. Your eyes met in the mirror but other than that he didn’t acknowledge you.

Finally, he said, “I talked to my mother and I know you were telling the truth. About the money and how you felt about me. I believe you.”

“But I shouldn’t have lied.” His fingers paused on his buttons and he turned to look at you.

“But you did.” He started walking towards you.

“I know but that doesn’t change the fact that it was wrong. And I was stupid, I was so stupid and—”

“That’s what they say about love isn’t it,” he mumbled. His eyes trailed over you as you continued to ramble. You stopped talking.

“What?”

“ ‘Love makes people do stupid things’ or whatever the saying is.” He smiled at you. “And I’d say we’ve both been complete idiots.” You laughed. “Seriously, we’ve both almost ruined our relationship.”

“I’m so sorry.” You put your head on his chest and his hand came up to the small of your back.

“I know.”

“If I could take it all back—”

“We can’t change the past, all we can do is be better in the future and I’m determined to make this work. ‘Cause this didn’t start with you and my mother’s little scheme.” His other hand moved to cup your cheek and he moved you head up to look at him. “I have been in love with you ever since Hogwarts and no matter what happened we were always gonna end up here.”

You wrapped your arms around him, pulling yourself further into him. “We’re going to have to build trust but that’s fine because I know we’re both willing to do it. I’m going to have to work on myself. And of course, you’ll have to make it up to me but it’ll be a longgggg honeymoon, so I’m sure you’ll figure something out.” He smirked when you hit his back and hid your laughter by pressing against his chest.

He kissed the top of your head. “Someday, we’ll be telling our kids this story and laughing.”

You looked up at him and smiled. “Someday.” You reaches for his buttons and continued to button his shirt. It was a soft black shirt that went nicely with his black slacks and the suit jacket that was draped across the arm chair in the corner of the room. It went even better with your plain black dress. It had thin straps and a slit that went up far enough to make Draco state.

When you finally buttoned the last button, you looked up at him. Your hand was still lingering around his neck and you reached up farther to touch the back of his neck. Your fingers reached up to touched his soft, bleach blonder hair. Just a touch.

Without you even having to pull him towards you, Draco’s lips were already on yours.

-

You were too distracted to hear the knock on the door but you did hear Narcissa’s voice. “Draco? (Y/N)?” You sat up quickly. You looked down at Draco’s wide eyes, looking like child who had just been caught doing something bad. You’d only been kissing—well, making out— but it was probably a good thing Narcissa hadn’t came in.

“Guests are arriving, you should probably join us.”

There was a pause as you looked at each other, wondering who was going to answer. Quickly, Draco shouted, “We’ll be down in just a minute.”

Another pause and then she said, “Okay.” You didn’t quite breath again until you couldn’t hear the click of her heels anymore. You sighed and laid your head on Draco’s shoulders. Your thighs were on either side of his hips and he had his hands placed firmly on top of them.

“I know, but we’ve got all the time in the world.”

“I know.” You places a gentle kiss on his neck and after he squeezed your thighs once more, you rolled off of him.

You got up and stood in front of the mirror, hoping your hair wasn’t too messed up. You straightened your dress and began to reapply your lipstick. Draco came up behind you, tucking his shirt back into his pants where it came up slightly. Once you were finished you turned around and flattened his hair which was now ruffled.

With a smile, you reached up to wipe some of your lipstick from edges of his mouth. Then you turned around, taking in the image of you both together. He stood behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. You put your hands over his.

In the end, everything had worked out perfectly.

[beatlevmania]

Concept where reader is American and ringo and her are dating and has him do an American accent and vice versa lol

This is OLD so I’m so sorry for the wait but I’m going through my inbox and this caught my eye :)

———

Raindrops fell on the roof of the diner, creating a soft and relaxing pattering sound above you. You could hear the faint cymbal crashes of a 50s pop song playing out of the old jukebox in the corner. The smell of French fries and cooking burgers wafted out from the kitchen.

You were seated in a booth in the corner of the diner; the worn, plastic-covered seats slightly sticky against your bare legs and slightly squeaky when you moved around. Your arms were outstretched, forearms resting on the cold table in front of you, holding hands with your favorite person and boyfriend- Ringo.

You were the only ones at the small, unnoticeable diner. After an incredibly stuffy and extremely boring event for another award the boys had won, you and Ringo had left to find yourselves ravenous. Those hors d’œuvres they passed around during cocktail hour did nothing to satisfy yours or Ringo’s appetites. So, you guys drove off in search of the closest restaraunt- at that point, you would have eaten Ringo’s cooking: and that’s saying something.

It was late, and you were getting sleepy- you were staring into Ringo’s blue eyes dreamily as he squeezed your hands from the other side of the booth. He looked so handsome in his navy suit, hair combed neatly and rings flashing on his fingers. He looked like a movie star- or, the greatest musician in the world. Which he was.

You snapped out of your peaceful trance when the only waitress left in the diner arrived right next to you.

“What’cha want?” she sighed, pulling her notepad out of her apron and glancing at you rudely. She did NOT want to be there, that was clear.

“Um,” you stuttered, not even having looked at the menu yet. “Do you have, like, a grilled cheese sandwich or something?”

The waitress just looked at you. “This is a diner. Of course we have grilled cheeses.” She marked your order down in her notepad as Ringo sniggered, trying to not to laugh at this woman’s attitude.

“What about you?” She grumbled at Ringo.

He took a deep breath to compose himself, his eyes crinkling in effort. You noticed a glint appearing in his eyes- a glint you knew all too well. You narrowed your eyes at him, trying to signal that he needed to stop this funny business, young man!

He either didn’t notice your excellent signaling, or obviously ignored it, because he went right on with his little joke.

“I’ll get a grilled cheese, too,” he said slowly with an incredibly over dramatic American accent. He sounded like a cross between a New Yorker and a cowboy- which was not a pleasant combination. His lips twitched as he tried to stifle his smile, staring right at you as your mouth dropped in shock.

The waitress looked up at him, obviously confused, and probably a bit concerned for him as well. “Is that all ‘ye want?” She asked, squinting at him.

“I’m also,” he paused dramatically. He snorted, trying to hide a laugh, before regaining his composure and continuing. “I’m also fixin’ for an ice-cold milkshake. Make it strawberry.” He looked at the waitress with a dead look on his face- no sign of laughter or anything of the like.

She looked at him oddly, obviously at a loss for words, before turning to head into the kitchen. The second she turned her back, Ringo erupted into violent laughter. You couldn’t help but join in and you both were shaking with laughter, tears running down your faces.

Finally, you looked up, hiccuping slightly, and he did the same.

“How’s my accent, darlin?” He said with that same New Yorker/Cowboy hybrid, and it took all your willpower to not erupt into laughter again.

“I can’t believe you, you little,” you trailed off, shaking your head at him with a smile on your lips.

He leaned torwards you excitedly across the table. “I can’t believe I said fixing to,” he said in disbelief, Scouse accent appearing once again. “I’m such an American, aren’t I, y/n!”

You stared at him in shock for a second. An idea formed in your brain. Slowly, you began.

“Listen here, Richard Starkey. Now, if I wasn’t yer bird, I’d leave ‘ya right now, flat on yer arse, I would!” You spoke with such a heavy, exaggeration Scouse accent that Ringo couldn’t help but crack up within the first sentence.

“Hey now, I’m not done with ‘ya!” You tried to continue, but Ringo’s laughter forced you to trail off in giggles.

“Hush, Ringo, I’m trying to fight back!” You cackled, hiccuping again, but it was a futile effort.

Ringo grabbed your hands across the table again and you settled down, looking back up at him and sighing.

You both took some deep breaths and looked at each other, the diner now extremely quiet due to the absence of your laughter.

“Oh, y/n,” he smiled at you. “I love you, my American girl.”

———

Even though it was really just a blurb it’s still the first thing I’ve written in a longgggg time other than ships so I hope you all liked it!

[wordsandshawn]

Chaos

This was requested a longgggg time ago. I found it buried deep in my drafts unfinished so I decided to finish it up and post it. 

Requested: could you do a post like your Mobbed one, but do it the other way around where it's y/n who panics and has bad anxiety?

~~~

The only way to describe what you have just stepped into is chaos. Complete and utter chaos. In the year you’ve been dating Shawn and the month that you’ve been on tour with him, you’ve never experienced anything at this level of crazy. What started off as a nice afternoon exploring the city and stopping for lunch in a cute cafe with Shawn turned into a crowd of girls following you both despite the many times Shawn politely asked them to leave you two alone after he had given them all pictures. Apparently, a couple of them had also tweeted out your location while you were in the cafe, so by the time you’re finished eating, there is a massive crowd waiting outside. 

Shawn had convinced Andrew and Jake that it would be fine for the two of you to go out without security. Truthfully, you both really just wanted to be able to spend some time alone, to go out on a date together without any one else around. After taking one look at the crowd, Shawn sighs loudly, taking your hand and stopping you from walking any closer to the exit of the cafe. “We can’t go out in that, y/n.” He says firmly, sounding slightly frustrated, and you don’t blame him. 

“It’ll be fine,” You try reassuring him, even you know he’s not worried for himself, but for you. You’ve never been a big fan of big crowds. Sometimes even sitting in the sound booth at his concert overwhelms you.

“I don’t think we should go out.” He says, still hanging back and not approaching the door. He pulls out his phone, probably to call Jake to tell him to come and to bring more security with him.

But you stop him before he gets a chance to. “Let’s just go, you can take pictures with them and then we’ll be on our way.” You try to sound cheery, not wanting the day to be ruined because of this. As much as you appreciate his fans, and you know he loves them, sometimes it is hard when you two just wanted to be able to spend a normal day together, but it gets interrupted because a few fans don’t respect his personal space and time.

“But there are a lot of them,” He says hesitantly.

“I’ll wait on the side, away from the crowd.” You tell him, pulling on his hand to get him to walk again. You only have a little over an hour before you have to head back to the venue, and you had planned to go into a few of the stores you saw while walking to the cafe earlier, you don’t want to have to wait here until security shows up because that would take a while and if you did that then you probably wouldn’t have time to shop.

“You’re sure you’re okay?” He questions, stopping you from walking. He looks down at you, making eye contact, searching your eyes for the truth.

You nod, “I’m sure.” The fans are here for him, not you, so no one will care that you’re waiting off to the side, at least that’s what you’re hoping. For some reason sometimes fans like to get pictures with you. If that’s the case today, it will be fine as long as you’re away from the crowd and the few fans that want pictures with you can come over to you when they’re done getting their pictures with Shawn. That way hopefully it won’t be too crazy and they won’t really crowd you the way they often do to Shawn. You learned a while ago that staying by Shawn’s side once crowds start to form only freaks you out and you’re much better off away from him. Even though being near him helps ease your anxiety, it is completely counterproductive because when it come to fans, they get even crazier out of sheer excitement the closer they are to Shawn, so you’re best off as far away as you can get.

When you get to the door, Shawn squeezes your hand tightly in his. “I’ll go out first.” He pauses, “That way you can slip out afterward and they won’t crowd you.” He knows you so well. Even though you try not to show how terrified you get in crowds like these, Shawn seems to know anyway.

You nod, and let go of his hand. With one last glance back, he pushes the door open, and walks over to the crowd. His back is toward you as he approaches the crowd, but you’re willing to bet that he has a fake smile plastered on his face. Over the next few minutes, the crowd only seems to get larger, but you don’t want to wait inside any longer, so you step outside, hoping that Shawn is almost finished and the two of you can be on your way soon. Your plan is to walk over to a fountain not too far away. You’ll sit there and wait for Shawn, since you’ll be able to see him from there.

You don’t make it more than about five feet from the door of the cafe when fans start swarming you too. They’re asking for pictures, and start taking pictures of you and with you before you can even get a word out. More and more fans are coming towards you now, They’re starting to crowd you, and you’re not far enough from the crowd around Shawn. You swear, the fans seem to be multiplying at an insane rate. You’re starting to think this was a bad idea. Your throat starts to feel tight, and you try desperately to force a breath, but its so much harder than it should be, and you know whats coming now.

Fans are asking what’s wrong, they’re crowding even more, wanting to know why you look so pale and why you’re not talking to them. You can feel your heart beating as the too familiar feeling of panic hits you. You try to push through the girls, but they’re only firing more questions at you, seeming more confused than ever.

“Hey!” You hear Shawn’s familiar voice over the constant hum of female voices. “Give her space.” He shouts, and you can tell he’s trying to get to you, but you don’t think he’ll be here fast enough. “I’m sorry, I have to go. We have to go.” He says firmly in a voice that lets his fans know he’s serious. “Please, if you all could just back up, I’d really appreciate it.” He shouts in a rush, and even though his voice is tight, like he’s upset, it still helps you to focus on it. The girls listen, luckily, and Shawn is finally by your side. As much as you wish that things would suddenly be alright again, that isn’t the case. He grabs one of your hands, and leans down to speak soothingly into your ear, “I’m right here. Focus on me.” He leads you away from the crowd, and you’re still having trouble breathing and focusing on what’s going on around you.

Shawn’s arms are around you, holding you close, knowing it brings you comfort. “I got you, breathe baby.” He says soothingly. His voice is steady and calm at the same time. He keeps talking to you about breathing, forcing you to breathe with him and slow down your breathing. He reassures you that he’s got you and that you’ll be okay.

He’s no stranger to your panic attacks and anxiety. Over the past year, he’s learned the best ways to calm you down. He knows to just hold you tight, he knows the sound of his voice calms you, and he knows that you get really sleepy after a panic attack, and you feel a little off for the rest of the day.

You let yourself get lost in the feeling of his arms, of the comfort they bring. By the time you’re able to get your bearings back, you notice that the crowd of girls did not disperse, they stayed, simply staring at you like you were the show. Before you’re able to dwell on that any longer, Shawn opens the door to a car that pulled up, and he helps you inside. Shawn somehow managed to call an Uber during your freakout, knowing how important it was for you to just get away from the curious onlookers and overzealous fans.

Once inside the car, he wraps you tightly in his arms, and continues to whisper soothing things in your ear. You lean into him, focusing on his voice and the safety of his arms around you. You nearly fall asleep on the way back to the venue. All desire you two both had earlier to enjoy a peaceful afternoon of window shopping and walking hand in hand exploring the city is completely gone now. The only thing you want now is to rest with Shawn’s arms around you. You simply want to be held, because even when your world feels like it is on the verge of falling apart, Shawn’s arms around you always manage to hold it together.

When you get back to the venue, you have to walk through it to in order to get to the parking garage with the buses. You run into Andrew, who asks Shawn why you’re back so early. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Shawn mumbles, “We’ll be on the bus. I’m doing a short soundcheck today.” By the tone of Shawn’s voice, and the way that you look, Andrew knows better than to ask any more questions. He knows he’ll find out later.

Shawn leads you to the bus, luckily without running into anyone else on the way. He leads you to the back lounge, and tells you that he’ll be right back. All you really want to do is to fall asleep in Shawn’s arms right now, but most of all, you don’t want him to leave you. You don’t want to be alone.

“Wait, Shawn.” You say, your voice coming out sounding much higher and more desperate than you expected, and he immediately stops, afraid that something else is wrong. “I don’t want you to go.” You say, quietly this time.

He had taken a few steps away before you called him back, so now he returns to standing right in front of you. “Baby,” he says, his voice calm and soothing. “I’m just going to get you a change of clothes, and a bottle of water. I’m not leaving the bus.”

You feel like a baby, and you hate it. You’re being ridiculous, but you can’t help it. Before you can respond, Shawn says, “I’ll leave the door open. You’ll be able to see me the whole time.” You nod, and he leans down, kissing you lightly on the forehead before walking quickly to minimize the time he’ll have to be away.

He returns in a record amount of time with a pair of your leggings, fuzzy socks, and a long sleeve shirt of his. At this point, you really just want to sleep. You take the clothes he gave you and change while he trades his black jeans for a pair of sweats as well. As soon as you’re finished, you lay on the couch next to Shawn, the two of you barely fitting, but you’re used to this by now. Its better lying here than trying to both squeeze into a bunk.

“How are you feeling?” He asks.

“I’m okay,” You lie automatically.

“Baby, I need you to be honest.” He says seriously, but still kindly. “Tell me, how are you feeling?”

“Still anxious,” You say, slightly louder than a whisper. Your fingers are fiddling with his fingers, moving them around in your hands and he lets you. “Tired too.” You add.

“Sleep hun,” He says, “I’ll try not to wake you when I leave for soundcheck, but I'll be back to check on you before the concert. Just stay here tonight, yeah?” He suggests, and you nod, so he continues. “No one should come onto the bus this afternoon or during the concert. Text me if you need anything or if you start feeling really anxious.” He pauses, like he’s thinking, then adds, “Text Andrew too, just in case I can’t check my phone.” You nod, yawning, and he pulls you closer, making sure you’re comfortable. You fall asleep to the steady sound of Shawn’s breathing, and the safe feeling of his arms around you.

[anerdinallherglory]

Approaching Sun (11)

Author's Note: Hey guys! Sorry for such a longgggg wait. Between last chapter and this one, I had a crazy professor who assigned me a 70 page Unit Plan assignment. It was literally the HARDEST thing I have ever done. In short, I am thankful for your patience. I will get this story done eventually, I promise. However, starting on January 4th, I will be fulfilling my final internship, so I’m looking at another 4 months of busy. Don’t give up on me, though! SasuSaku will always consume my free time.

So here is your long-awaited chapter! As always, let me know what you think. And look out for the next chapter—boy am I excited to write it!

P.S. Reviews and shares always encourage a writer to write more!

Pairing: SasuSaku

Summary: After 2 years, Sasuke returns to the village where friends anxiously await him. Still troubled by the mysteries of Kaguya and his personal guilt, Sasuke is split between friends and his journey. One specific pink-haired individual has perhaps waited for him with far more dedication than anyone else. Troubled by rising casualties and international dependence on her abilities, Sakura is torn between her love for Sasuke and her duty to her village.

Chapters 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Chapter 11: Doing What is Best

 Sakura looked down at her feet guiltily when she heard Kakashi's voice from the door. Sasuke had already been hard enough to face, and now here was the man who was to Sakura both sensei and Hokage--not to mention whom Sakura had cussed vividly at and blamed for her own mistakes last night--coming to see her.

"What do you want?" she heard Sasuke spit out rudely as he stood anchored in the doorway, arms crossed and looking as smug as Sakura had ever seen him.

"To see Sakura, of course!" another familiar voice called out cheerfully, and Sakura's eyes grew wide when she recognized Shizune's smiling speech. Pushing past the pissed-off Uchiha, Shizune squeezed between him and the crack in the door rather forcefully. Sometimes, Sakura could see characteristics of Lady Tsunade in the young woman who was also the Sanin’s pupil.

As Kakashi made his entrance, Sakura caught the annoyed look Sasuke was giving The Hokage. Kakashi awkwardly rubbed the back of his head before whispering, "She refused to be left behind."

Shizune embraced Sakura immediately.

"Sakura," Shizune said, holding Sakura at arm's length to look her up and down, "I am glad to see you are okay. You certainly had us all worried!"

Sakura tried to look apologetic, but tears sprang forward to her eyes. Shizune looked back at Kakashi worriedly, and in response, the Hokage made his way to them.

Sakura wiped at her eyes and strengthened her resolve and looked up at Kakashi. It was time she owned up to her behavior the night before. "Lord Hokage," she began, placing her hands together and bowing before him.

"None of that," Kakashi stuttered awkwardly, ducking to lift Sakura's chin up so she could meet his eyes. "I will always be Sensei to you."

"Kakashi Sensei, I am extremely sorry for my conduct last night," she continued when he released her chin. "Please forgive me." She faintly recalled throwing glass bottles towards him and inwardly groaned. He was certain to be disappointed in her. Sakura had proven that she had a breaking point, a weakness. Ninja who showed weakness would not survive in this shinobi world.

"We all have bad days," Kakashi began, standing beside her and placing a palm fixedly on her disheveled head. "Just ask Shizune," he added, gesturing in the surprised woman’s direction, "She's had her share of drunken episodes too. Tsunade is my witness."

"Kakashi!" Shizune cried out, raising her hands to cover her red face. Sakura smiled and Kakashi grinned back at her under his mask.

"Yes, well," Shizune interjected, grabbing hold of Sakura's arm and taking her hand. "You can say that none of us are perfect. Sometimes we make unwise decisions which lead to more unwise decisions, and so on. What's important is that you are okay and that you know that none of this is your fault."

Sakura nodded her head but didn’t reply. She looked down at her feet again. Of all people, she should know what to expect being in the medical core. She had witnessed so many deaths during the Fourth Shinobi World War and here she was making a huge fuss over one child she barely knew. However, this was a suicide that Sakura believed she could have prevented if she had only done her job.

Sakura looked over at Sasuke, who was now leaning against the wall, arms crossed and eyes closed. He had the same scowling look on his face that he always wore, eyebrows angling down to make a sharp "V" and his mouth a hard, pursed line. Perhaps, if Sakura had just forgotten about him--hadn't made such a big fuss about his return, she could have done her job. Maybe this was why she was feeling so guilty.

Sasuke spoke suddenly, his voice a grumble from across the room. "Why are you here?"

All eyes turned to the forgotten ninja, a small silence falling upon them.

"Ah," Kakashi spoke up, walking over to his moody student and placing a hand on his left shoulder. Sasuke glared at him. "Apologies for just showing up unannounced. We didn’t interrupt anything did we?"

Sasuke's eyes grew wide at the comment and Sakura waved her hands frantically.

"No, nothing!" she said quickly, which seemed to make the Hokage's smile grow wider. This made Sakura's face turn almost the exact same shade as her hair color. Sakura caught Sasuke's eye and they both looked away hurriedly.

"To answer your question Sasuke," Kakashi said, codeswitching back to his Hokage speech and taking on his authoritative personality. "We came for the both of you. We have some new residents in the village who need your medical attention, Sakura. Think you can help us out?"

Sakura looked over at her sensei who was looking at her expectantly. Shizune offered Sakura a smile of her own and Sakura nodded. It was time she got back to doing what she did best. Sakura caught Sasuke's gaze and she looked away. It was time she put her patients first in all matters, even matters concerning her heart.

. . . . . .

Sasuke had groaned inwardly when Kakashi proposed that they all go to the barracks to provide medical attention to the ninja Sasuke had rescued from the Coliseum. Sasuke had thought he had dodged this very situation the other day, and when he acted as if he were about to leave their group, Kakashi had spoken up, saying, "Why don't you come with us Sasuke? I'm sure we can find something for you to do. After all, you're the reason they are here."

Sasuke had grumbled under his breath, resentful for how many times Kakashi was going to remind him of that fact. This is what he got for helping people: work, responsibility, and more work. Sasuke had gotten used to cleaning up a mess, wiping his hands spotless from it, and avoiding all aftereffects. That was one thing that Sasuke really liked about not being in the village.

"You are?" Sakura had asked, turning to face him.

Sasuke's stomach had pitched as a former concern entered in his mind at her question. This is exactly what he had been trying to avoid yesterday. He didn't want to be there when Sakura was healing the injuries he was directly responsible for. Ever since the Uchiha had entered this village, everything was going exactly how he didn't want it to. Literally everything, and this was another example.

Sasuke hadn't replied and instead Kakashi had spoken up on his behalf, not mentioning this most important detail. He skipped the part where Sasuke had directly attacked these ninja, instead just telling Sakura that he had rescued them. Sakura had looked down at her feet and smiled which made Sasuke feel even more guilty. It was lie, but he couldn't tell her the truth, just when she was starting to think well of him.

At first, Sasuke had thought that the four of them would be working together, but five minutes into their walk, Shizune had departed for the hospital, and Kakashi had merely dropped them off at the door, saying, "I forgot that I had a meeting today. I'm late, so if you will excuse me."

Sasuke had glowered at him as he placed a reassuring hand on each of their arms, saying "I believe in you two," before walking away--rather unhurriedly for someone who was late to a meeting.

Now, Sasuke stood completely useless against a wall, offering no assistance as Sakura kindly tended to the people she was healing. She had seen almost every patient while Sasuke sat back and watched her. It was something that Sasuke had never seen her do before. She wasn’t wearing her lab coat, but Sakura possessed a focused demeanor as she conducted check-ups on all the ninja. It was strange to witness her apply knowledge that Sasuke hadn't been there to witness her gain. She had always been smart, smarter than him in almost all areas of knowledge at the academy. But the woman before him wasn’t raising her finger to tell her teammates how much she knew, or chastising Naruto for how little he knew. The woman before him, currently stooped over a middle-aged man's back and using her chakra to draw out infection through a deep cut along his shoulder, was the Sakura he had missed out on.  This was who Sakura was now, and Sasuke couldn't help but admire her.

A tug on his shirt tore the Uchiha's gaze away from his pink-haired teammate and onto a small child who was looking up at him.

"You Uchiha?" a little girl asked, crossing her arms in a challenge. Sasuke frowned down at her in reply.

"Hatsuko," the man Sakura was healing hissed back at the girl, "Go back to your mother. Leave this man alone."

Hatsuko ignored her father, and matched Sasuke's glare with one of her own. "Hurt my papa again, and you'll have to fight me!" she yelled, punctuating her statement with a raised fist and a stuck-out tongue.

Sasuke hurriedly snuck a glance at Sakura and flinched when her gaze landed on him, whom obviously had not missed the exchange. He glared back at the child, not saying a word.

"Hatsuko!" her father roared, standing up hurriedly to walk in the child's direction. The little fiery juvenile sprinted off in another direction. "This man saved me!" he called after her, just as she slammed the door down the hall from them, "GET BACK HERE AND APOLOGIZE!"

Wincing, the man grabbed his shoulder and Sakura rushed over to lead him back to his chair. "Forgive me," he bowed towards Sasuke. "My daughter is young and doesn't understand what you did for us."

"I'm the one who should be apologizing," the Uchiha said softly, feeling guilty and properly chastised by a little girl. For the first time, he walked over to the man and stood solemnly before him. "Perhaps if I had thought more clearly, I could have found another way to--"

"Don't blame yourself, young man" the ninja interrupted, flinching suddenly as Sakura tightly secured the final knot of his stitches. Clearing his throat, he continued, "There was no other way. What you did for us is something to be proud of. We would all be stuck fighting for our lives in that hellish place if it weren’t for you. We are all extremely grateful."

Sasuke glanced over to Sakura. Now that the cut was now clean and freshly stitched, Sakura covered the wound with gauze and wrapped it securely with bandage wrap.

"You're all done," she stated, "I'll be back in ten days to remove the stitches. Make sure to keep the wound clean. Be gentle and apply fresh bandages every night, except for tonight."

"Yes ma'am," he said, standing and bowing graciously to Sasuke's teammate. "I am grateful to you both. Konoha has some very fine ninja. It is thanks to you that I don’t have to worry about being separated from my family or sold to another shinobi. You have brought me the peace of freedom, Uchiha Sasuke."

As the man took his leave, he apologized once again for his daughter's behavior.

After he was out of sight, he turned to Sakura who was now cleaning up the stitching kit that was laid out across the counter. She pushed it carefully in a big yellow bag that she had brought along with her. Sakura picked it up and Sasuke closed his eyes when she walked past him out the door. She stopped to wait for him in the hall and he followed her until they were past all the people who stopped them and thanked them.

Once out the door and into the darkness, Sasuke caught up with Sakura and took the bag out of her hand. It was the only polite thing he believed had ever done for anyone probably ever in his life.

"Thank you," she said surprised. A small smile touched her lips but Sasuke was absorbed in silence.

Once they were alone together, walking the dark passageways to her apartment, Sasuke couldn’t remain silent anymore and spat out, "I know what you're thinking."

Sakura peeked over at him as they walked, a look of confusion on her face. Almost like she wasn’t expecting any kind of explanation from him about anything. "You do?"

"You must think I haven't changed at all," he said, looking away from her.

She reached out and gently took his elbow, stopping them and turning him towards her slightly. He pulled back from her but didn’t look away.

"That's not what I think," Sakura whispered to him. "I think you are a hero for saving all of those people."

"But I hurt them, " he said firmly, "I'm still hurting innocent people." She was looking at him softly in response and Sasuke didn’t know why, but he was suddenly angry at her for it. Was she still trying to justify his actions in her mind? Why was it so hard for her to hate him?

"You are being too hard on yourself," she offered kindly, touching his elbow again reassuringly. "You've changed. What you did was for the best."

She began walking again, but Sasuke dropped the yellow bag at his feet and quickly grabbed her sleeve, keeping her from moving. "I can't let you walk away thinking good of me. I was angry when I fought them. Angry with Oyashiro En and all the other ninja who had put them there. I had taken them down in the quickest way that I knew how. I fought children--"

"Sasuke," she said seriously, picking her bag off the ground and slipping the handle in the crook of her arm. "Before I ever was a medical ninja, I was your teammate. By healing them, I could recognize you in their injuries from the very beginning, but I was surprised not because I learned that you had done this, but surprised because of how careful you were with them when I know how hard that must have been while facing them all."

Sasuke scowled at her. "That's not an excuse."

Sakura looked up at the sky as a faint light suddenly fell on them, and Sasuke followed her gaze. The moon was peeking out between two dark silvery clouds. He looked back down at her, staring at her as she watched the moon. Her face and hair lit up for a moment and she offered him a small smile in reply. "I'm not someone to offer advice, but sometimes you have to hurt people in order to do what's best for them. It's a part of being a shinobi. I'm sure Itachi would agree. I think he would be proud of you, Sasuke."

Sasuke's eyes grew wide at the mention of his brother's name. Did she mean him? Itachi had sacrificed everything, even his own happiness, in order to protect the village. He had killed their family and abandoned Sasuke. Is this what she meant?

Her voice interrupted his thoughts as she said, "Let's forget the past. Let's learn from our mistakes and grow from them. I'm going to work towards becoming a stronger medic ninja for the village and you can work towards being the best shinobi that you can be. Can we do that together?"

Sasuke held her gaze, scowl remaining fixed on his face. The best shinobi that he could ever be, huh? Sasuke didn’t know if that was a possibility, but he would try. He would do what was best for the village and the people he cared deeply about. Sasuke didn’t answer her but when Sakura tugged on his sleeve, he followed her.

. . . . . . . .

They spent the rest of the walk in silence. Sakura didn’t release Sasuke's sleeve and he didn’t pull away. It was a fragile moment, a moment that Sakura was afraid would break if she spoke or breathed too hard. Sasuke's right hand swung at his side, sleeve caught barely in her fingers. Sakura wanted desperately to grab his fingers but she knew that would be crossing the line of whatever they had between them.

Whenever they reached the door, Sakura released Sasuke's sleeve and walked in first, setting down her bag. "I'll make you some tea, if you'd like. Or if you're too tired--"

"Sakura," came Sasuke’s emotionless voice from outside the door. Sakura turned and realized that he didn’t follow her in and her stomach lurched suddenly. Sakura walked back outside and looked up at him, worry settling heavily in her heart.

"What's wrong?" she asked, trying to reach for his sleeve again. He pulled back this time and instead slowly placed his hand in his cloak and revealed something small. Sasuke held it out to her without looking at her, and Sakura took what she recognized to be the key she had given him. Was he really giving it back to her? Did this mean he really leaving?

"We both know I can’t stay here," Sasuke said, looking away from her. “My answer is no.”

Sakura stared down at the key in her hand, and realized for the first time that Sasuke was saying goodbye. Sasuke wasn’t just saying no to coming in. He was distancing himself. He was telling her no. Tears sprung to her eyes as she looked down at the ridiculous key.

"No to what, Sasuke?" she whispered, as he made to turn away from her. Without a care, she walked in front of him, placing a palm on his chest. "No to what?"

"No to everything," he said, finally meeting her eyes, confirming her thoughts.

"I thought that we were growing closer; I thought that we could try--" Sakura said desperately, trying to understand why he would do this. Why couldn't he just let her into his heart? After everything they had been through together, why did he not care for her in the same way that she cared for him?"

"The most we will ever be is friends, Sakura, and that's all," he replied, and Sakura searched his features for any signs that would betray his words but his face remained perfectly stoic and firm. His dark onyx eyes did not waver.

"I've already told you. I can't be the man you want me to be. I have a mission, a duty to protect this village, and so do you. You said it earlier; we can work towards our goals and become better shinobi for our village," Sasuke said plainly, and Sakura felt shocked at how he was using her own words against her. 

Tears began to roll down Sakura's cheeks and she wiped furiously at them, begging herself to stop. Be strong, she whispered to her pounding heart. It was a useless plea.

"I love you, Sasuke. I will wait for you. I know that we can make this work if--"

His right hand caught her arm and he pulled her towards him and Sakura froze. Gently, he held her before him, looking down at her and replying, "I want you to stop waiting. I want you to move on with your life. Find someone who can give you the happiness you deserve. That person is never going to be me."

Sasuke released her after a minute, and he turned away from her, showing her his back like he always did. The distance between them grew as he walked away.

Sakura wanted to call out to him. She wanted Sasuke to know that she couldn’t stop waiting for him. That there would never be anyone else. But instead, all she managed was to plead through her tears, "Please don’t say goodbye. Please don’t leave me alone again. You are breaking my heart!"

And then he was in front of her again, so quickly that Sakura had missed it when she blinked. She flinched when Sasuke reached out and placed two heavy fingertips against her forehead. After a second, his fingers moved to support her chin.

"Sometimes you have to hurt people in order to do what's best for them," he whispered in that deep monotone voiced that only belonged to him. When Sakura opened her eyes, he had disappeared into the surrounding darkness.  

[heymstia-blog]

Where Is Your Mother?

   Abolarinde Adonis Dominic was born Thursday, December 15, 2016 at 12:24 am weighing in at a 7 lbs 8 oz and 22 inches long. Through my shock and confusion I still remembered to ask for delayed cord clamping. My room was full of doctors, nurses and commotion. Everyone was laughing at how loud Abolarinde was (I’m not surprised he is his mother’s child). I waited for the “after birth” that I heard about but it wasn’t as bad as I expected. What was bad and what  I didn’t expect was the stitches that I had to get in my Purse directly after I gave birth. With every stitch I said, “Ow...ow....ow...ow...ow...”. My parents and sorority sister waited outside of my room while I collected myself. I wanted to have my time to connect with Abolarinde, try to breastfeed him and just overall figure out what the heck I was doing. I assumed this would come instantly. I’ve heard so many stories and watched TV shows about how right after birth mommies were so in love and had this immediate connection with their baby. I had the complete opposite experience. Even though he grew inside of me for 9 months, I felt all of his movements, I talked to him daily, I saw him on sonograms every two weeks I knew nothing about him and he knew nothing about me. I was very disappointed. I talked to myself, “Where is your mother? I think I’m your mommy”. I wanted that connection to happen. I felt horrible. I loved that he was mine, I loved that I was finally initiated into the motherhood club but I was not in love with him. Furthermore, I was beyond confused. I am a chocolate drop, my husband is from Nigeria and Abolarinde was light-skinned (I didn’t know he was going to change colors eventually).

  Every one came in the room and passed around the baby, ooooo and ahhhhing about how he looked. My parents told me how proud they were of me and JayJay and in the corner of the room was JayJay sitting in the chair trying to gather his thoughts. I was worried for him. He was all over the place. He was quiet, he smiled, he cried, he looked traumatized. I kept asking him was he okay and he tried to reassure me he was but I knew he wasn’t. In Nigeria its not common for the fathers to go into the labor and delivery room with their spouses so this was a new experience for him and I tried to understand that. My parents and sister left the room so I could get rest and JayJay walked them out. I reached over to pick up Abolarinde from the bassinet and I tried to make myself emotional. I looked at him and attempted to squeeze out some tears with the hopes that I could make this thing real for myself but NOTHING. I put him back and tried to rest. The whole night I stared at him. Could not sleep. I was scared that if I slept I would miss his cry or not be able to tend to him. When I finally did close my eyes he cried out and it scared me half to death. Here I am trying to care for this newborn baby and he can’t talk and tell me whats wrong. I assumed he was hungry so I fed him and he still cried, I then changed him and he cried harder so I laid him on my chest.

The next day came and I was yet in shock. Dr. Morris, nurses, other doctors, insurance, a pediatrician, a lactation nurse, Jesus and the disciples came in my room back to back to congratulate me, run tests, check the baby, check on me, ask a bunch of questions and I was OVERWHELMED. I have to make doctor’s appointments, I have to send things off for a social security card, I have to answer questions for insurance all while keeping a log of how long Abolarinde nurses, which side and how many times he pees and poops. HELLPPPPPPP. Let’s back track: I knew as soon as I found out I was pregnant that I wanted to breastfeed. I was excited about the health benefits that came with it, the bonding experience for me and my baby and how much money I would save. I did not know that the baby would have to adjust to breastfeeding. He did well the first night but after that, breastfeeding in the hospital became a task. Sometime’s he would open his mouth and sometimes as soon as I put my breast to his lips he’d cry. Eventually I began to cry. When you’re breastfeeding you don’t know how much your child is getting or how much he’s eating. You have to judge from the appearance of their jaws and their ears if their swallowing, monitor their weight, determine diapers to ensure they're not dehydrated and overall trust your intuition. I was convinced I was starving my child and my milk was not going to satisfy him. I was completely against my baby drinking formula but I didn’t think I had any choice. ( There was light at the end of the tunnel I successfully breastfed for 7 months). 

  My husband, myself and Abolarinde stayed in the hospital for 3 longgggg days. 3 of thee longest days of my life. I was appreciative of the nurses wanting to ensure my baby got the care he needed and checking on my health but I wanted to go home. My husband and I bickered like children. I criticized everything that he did. The way he held the baby, the way he changed him, the way he picked him up, the sounds he made to him, the way he breathed on him annoyed me to no end. I tried to be nice and let him be a father to his child but I felt he wasn’t doing anything right as if I knew what I was doing. I was also sleep deprived.  I don’t know why I thought babies slept all the time and some babies may but mine did not. I laid him down and 45 minutes to an hour later he would wake up crying. I could not believe it. I asked the nurses to take him to the nursery so I could rest but I never rested. I actually wanted them to bring him back. I expected to have a huge appetite but I felt nauseous with fear. I had this beautiful healthy baby boy but in the back of my mind I knew that on Sunday evening my husband would have to travel back to Chicago and I would be left alone with a newborn baby to care for alone during the week. It was terrifying for me. This thought stuck with me. 

  On Saturday morning we were being released to go home and I was relieved. There was one more test that doctors had to run on Abolarinde but I am truly grateful that all his tests came back normal. The nurse came in and gave me release papers and I got up to dress my baby. I went through the baby bag with different outfits I packed for him to go home in. I brought all 1-3 month clothes. I had no clue that there was a newborn size. His onesie and hat fit so big on him and I was embarrassed. I had these bags packed for WEEKS and here I go packing clothes that are too big. To add to my stress and anxiety that morning there was an ice storm and the roads were slick. I watched my husband inch slowly to the car outside the hospital window and I prayed to myself that we made it home safely. The nurse came, helped us strap in Abolarinde, sat me in the wheel chair with his car seat on top of my legs and wheeled us out of the room. As we were being wheeled out all the nurses, doctors and even some patients smiled and told me congratulations. JayJay put the baby in the car and I got in the back seat with him. We drove off from the hospital and I cried. It was not forced, I did’t have to squeeze my eyes or even work up the tears. I cried all the way home.