#help phantom strider

[theoneandonlygothicrainbow]

If you are at least a casual viewer of PhantomStrider, please continue reading.

Phantom Strider just released a video saying that he can’t afford to make videos anymore because he needs to get a full time job to pay his bills. It’s a tough situation because he seems to want to keep making content.

He stated in his video that he’s most likely going to have to leave unless enough Patreons sign up to possibly keep his channel alive.

I’m writing this post to spread the word in case people want to donate. This was my personal decision. If you can’t afford to donate, that’s ok. You can still help by spreading the word.

You can watch the video if you want to know more details.

[karkaraoke]

Danny Phantom Davesprite rewrite/traced gif by me, 2013 Recording by me, 2025

(he's a bird guy) (he is Davesprite)

Yo Dave Strider he was just thirteen When he installed a strange game on his machine Designed to play in a world foreseen

Gonna fix it all, ‘cause he is Dave Strider

When the timeline was doomed, these kids, they didn’t quit He and Rose figured they could just replay it There was a great gold flash, everything got changed There was stuff from the Game now in his brain

Davesprite, Davesprite

When he first woke up he realized He had amber hair and tangerine eyes He could phase through walls, disappear and fly! He was much less mainstream than the other guy.

It was then Davesprite knew what he had to do: He had to help Alpha Dave avoid what he’d been through He’s here to fight for me and you!

Gonna fix it all cause he is Dave Strider Gonna fix it all cause he is Dave Strider Gonna fix it all cause he is Dave Strider

[asktheverse]

Ask the Hammertime multiverse

Remember back in the golden days when there were in-character ask blogs?

Yeah, this is that.

This blog is for specific timelines featuring, you guessed it, Hammertime (aka johndave, junedave, etc)

For every version of Dave Strider that exists, even if it isn't under the same name, there is a John Egbert.

In every timeline, they meet.

Not all of those end happily.

Current timelines or alternate universes that have access to this blog and can answer your questions (that's right, you, the reader of this post) include the following:

In a world where supernatural creatures exist, there is going to be hunters of some kind. Here, we follow the story of human John Egbert and his 'best bro', recently turned vampire Dave Strider. He and Dirk 'survive' a murder attempt and are trying to live their not-lIves the best they can. A chance meeting at a Halloween party may just be the thing that can respark a believed-to-be-dead friendship (if not more). (Available characters to ask are John Egbert, Dave Strider, Dirk Strider, Dad Egbert, Jake English, and Bro Strider)

When Danny Fenton opened the portal to the Ghost Zone, he wasn't expecting to live through it- much less to come back out with a whole other person in tow. John Egbert is stuck in a world that is vastly different from his own, but with people who are eerily similar to the friends he’s left behind. Danny, meanwhile, is trying to figure out who the fuck Dave is, and how exactly to help this John guy out. (Available characters to ask are John Egbert, Danny Phantom)

College is rough. Struggling art major Dave Strider has left a shitty home behind and is now rooming with what may actually be the hottest woman ever, who also happens to be his best friend. June Egbert is one of the best things to happen to Dave, and as long as he keeps his shit under wraps, it’ll be fine. One question though- what the fuck is a business degree? (Available characters to ask are June Egbert and Dave Strider) 

Post-game, things are… weird. It’s hard enough trying to adjust to life outside of what felt like a warzone after who knows how long, now guardians are reappearing. Great for those with a healthy family! Less great for anyone who knows what one Bro Strider is capable of. (Available characters to ask are John Egbert, Dave Strider, “Dirk Strider”, Bro Strider, Alpha Dave, Dad Egbert, Rose Lalonde, Alpha Rose, ‘human’ Lil Cal, Jake English, Davepetasprite, Tavros, and ARquiusprite)

[starswordneo]

Switch's Hypothetical Minecraft update!

I've been brewing up a fun idea for a minecraft update that'll help refresh a bit of the general minecraft gameplay. None of this I think would be too intrusive, but rather expand on already existing concepts! Warning, nerdy and excited rambling below! If I had to give this update a title, it'd probably be "The Rewind & Refresh" or "Retread & Rework" update. Something to do with going back and giving love to older things!

--------- MOBS

--- PHANTOM REWORK

Now, Phantoms are a hated mob and I think that's kinda fair. Phantoms make the early game a bit bothersome if you don't want to rush, so here's my idea:

The Phantom and the new mob I introduce next are locked behind the day counter. In Minecraft, there's already a difficulty based on the amount of time passed. The Phantoms cannot start spawning until Day 15 has hit. If the player has not slept in 4 days, 1 Phantom will spawn and hunt the player, Day 5, 6, 7 will do the same. On the 8th day, 3 Phantoms will spawn, same for Day 9, 10, and 11. Once you hit Day 12, 5 Phantoms will spawn daily, until the player rests. After the player sleeps, the Phantom counter will go back to default, and the cycle will repeat.

--- THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN

After Day 20, a new mob will spawn, The Headless Horseman. The Headless horseman is a headless mob that rides a spooky Zombie Horse. It has a 0.5% chance to spawn every night, with a 2% chance on New Moons, and an additional 2% on Dark Oak, for a total of 4% in a Dark Oak Forest biome on a New Moon. They cannot spawn below y=50, so they are a surface only mob. If a Headless horseman spawns, another cannot spawn in a 75 block radius.

The Headless horseman attacks you by ramming into you with their Zombie Horse, much like a Goat does. This attack can deal 2/4/6 Hearts of damage on Easy/Normal/Hard. If the headless Horseman's horse dies, the Headless horseman will slowly perish. The Headless Horseman also burns during the day.

Once the Headless Horseman dies, they will drop 2-3 Iron OR 2-3 Gold, with a 20% chance to drop an enchantment book. (Fire Aspect, Unbreaking (I-III), Mending), and a 10% to drop 3 Emeralds.

The Headless horseman has a weakness, if the ground is less than 4 blocks deep, and there's water below it, or a pit at least 5 blocks deep, the Headless Horseman CANNOT pass, referring to the fairy tale.

--- NETHER WHALES

Nether whales are an endangered and mostly ambient mob that spawn in the Lava Ocean biomes. Nether Whales are 6 blocks long, 3 blocks wide, and 2 blocks tall. If a Nether Whale finds itself on land, it will explode with a power of a Charged Creeper. Nether Whales are preyed upon by Ghasts, and Nether Whales prey upon Baby Striders.

--------- THE DEEPER MOBS...

The Deep Sea is a part of the world I love, seeing all sorts of weird and strange creatures, like Anglerfish, barreleye fish, and Minecraft introducing deeper caves and the Deep Dark was something I was ECSTATIC to see! But, not much has been done JUST yet for the deeper mines. Here's my proposals!

--- COBWEBBED CREEPERS

Below y0, Creepers have a 10% chance to become Cobwebbed Creepers. Cobwebbed Creepers are slower, paler, and bulkier creepers. The creeper noises they make are mixed with Spider noises. They take a few extra seconds to explode, and when they do... 0-2 Cave spiders, and 0-1 Spiders spawn! The Cobwebbed Creeper's explosion is also weaker, only destroying blocks in a 3x3x3 area with an extra middle block in each direction. The danger of the Cobwebbed Creepers are that they spawn spiders, however, if you kill the Cobwebbed Creepers before they explode, they give 50 XP, roughly the same of 4 zombies at once.

Cobwebbed Creepers are weak to Bane of Arthropods, giving the enchantment more of a use for these bulkier and deadlier creepers.

--- CAVE SPIDER REWORK

Cave Spiders are a mob that ONLY spawn in Mineshaft Cave Spider Spawners. This is strange, considering their name. I propose they spawn at Y-20, replacing spiders 50% of the time. They also have only half the health of a regular spider. They still contain their poisonous abilities.

--- IGNEOUS ZOMBIES

Below y-20, and in Lava, Igneous Zombies can spawn. They're rocky zombies who are immune to lava! Once they spot a player, they slightly quickly make their way to the Player, and upon attacking, they light the player on Fire! They are frailer but quicker, and upon death, drops 2-4 Deepslate, and rarely, a cooked Potato, Golden Carrot or Steak. Baby and Villager Igneous Zombies don't exist.

Igneous Zombies are especially weak to Snowballs and Water, similar to Blazes.

--- SPECTERS

Below y-10 are the Specters. They're distant cousins to the Phantoms, appearing to Miners who haven't slept in 5 days. When they spot a player who hasn't slept, they'll bounce up from the ground, jumping 3 blocks high, and then slowly glide down to you. Anything they'll hit will be pushed out of the way, triggering Infighting, and dealing 1/3/5 hearts of damage. If they hit a wall while gliding, they'll take a good couple hearts of damage.

Killing them will make them drop Phantom Membranes, and rarely, a fish.

--------- CROPS

I'd also like to introduce 3 new crops, Corn, Tomatoes, and Nether Cattails

--- CORN

Corn is a 1x1x2 block crop that takes 12 stages to fully grow. Once it's ready to harvest, the 2 blocks it occupies can give 1-2 corn each, for a total of 2-4 Corn. This will set it back 5 stages, and will eventually grow back. Corn, when eaten, can restore 5 hunger (2.5 Meats). Cooking it on a Campfire will get you Roasted Corn, which will restore 7 Hunger (3.5 meats). Roasted Corn cannot be cooked in a Furnace. When eaten, Corn gives Cob, which can be used for Composting!

3 Corn in a row can be crafted into 2 Corn Seeds, which can be grown. Corn Seeds can be obtained in Villages, Zombies, or with a 1% Chance from Grass!

If you put 6 Bonemeal above and below, you'll get 12 Cornmeal! Cornmeal is a food item used with all farm Animals! (Pigs, Cows, Chickens, Sheep, etc etc). When used, Cornmeal has a 80% Chance to put an animal into Love mode.

--- TOMATOES

Tomatoes are another crop I'd like to introduce. When planted, it is 1x1x1, however, by placing a Fence Post, the plant can grow upwards, to a maximum to 3 blocks. When harvested after 6 stages, you get 2-3 Tomatoes, for a max of 6-9 Tomatoes! Tomatoes can be cooked like Corn, only via Campfire. Raw tomatoes give 2 Hunger (1 Meat), Roasted gives 4 Hunger (2 Meats)

With 2 Bread in the middle top and bottom, 1 Meat (Steak, Cooked Porkchop, Mutton), and 2 Veggies (Corn, Potatoes, Carrots, Tomatoes), you can craft a Sandwich! Sandwiches are unstackable foods with a unique feature, Durability! When eaten, it restores 14 Hunger, (7 Meats!!), and can be eaten 4 times. The Sandwich is a powerful food item, but takes 1.5x as long to eat then your usual meal.

With 3 Tomatoes, Milk, a Bucket, and 2 other Veggies, you can make Tomato Soup. Tomato Soup restores 8 Hunger (4 Meats), as well as cures all negative effects, leaving positive effects alone!

Tomatoes have one final feature, they can be placed like Sea Pickles, Turtle eggs and Candles! They can stack up to 14 times, in a pyramid formation. Tomatoes serve a more niche and decorate use.

--- NETHER CATTAILS

Nether Cattails are a plant that either grows next to, or in Lava! Nether Cattails can grow up to 4 blocks tall, and then creates a Nether Cattail tip. When it grows an extra stage, using the block will let it explode into 5-10 random dyes, (Blue Dye is replaced with Lapis!) and 1 Cattail seed. After a some time, it'll regrow. Nether Cattails would be a fun new addition to Nether Oceans, being their version of Sugarcane & Kelp!

Nether Cattails, when broken, can give you its Pod, and its stems. The Cattail stem can be used to make Paper, and the Pod can be used as a flint replacement for arrows! Nether Cattail Pods can be eaten, removing 2 Hunger, and giving 30 seconds of Fire, Nausea, and poison.

--------- STRUCTURES

Some Dungeons have simply been left to rot, with varying amounts of care to them,I'd like to simply refresh a couple!

--- PYRAMIDS

Pyramids are slightly bigger, and the interior will be re-decorated to be more egyptian themed. Normal Sandstone Pyramids will have 3 types of pits below the Blue Terracotta.

Type 1 will be the classic type, the old 4 chests with a tnt trap in the center!

Type 2 will be a stairway downwards, leading to a split hallway, as the end of the sides is a double chest filled with Treasure! A tripwire hook will also be hiding in the hallway, don't disarm it, and you'll explode!

Type 3 will contain a spiral staircase and once at the bottom, there's a large hallway with 4 rooms on the sides, each having loot. 3 of them are safe, and 1 is dangerous. The player can figure out the safe chest by checking the flooring, if the floor is red, rather then orange, that room is dangerous!

--- JUNGLE TEMPLES

Jungle Temples just need a general re-building. using Stone Bricks and their mossy counterparts along with Cobblestone! Some new varients of Jungle Temples would be lovely!

--- DUNGEONS

Classic Dungeons are a staple, and I propose a simple addition, Classic Dungeons can generate in different shapes! Spheres, Pyramids, Rectangles, Hexagons. To add to this, new Mob types can be generated, Creeper Dungeons, Cave Spider Dungeons, Stray Dungeons (in Snow Biomes) and Husk Dungeons (in Desert Biomes) can generate! Dungeons can contain Gold, Diamond,Emeralds, Melon & Pumpkin seeds, and 3 items regarding the mob type the dungeon spawned with. Zombies get Smite enchantment books, Carrots and Potatoes, Skeletons give Bows, bones and Bone blocks, Creepers give TNT, Gunpowder and Flint, the list goes on. The dungeons retain their old selves, but getting fun new variations!

---- STRONGHOLDS

Strongholds are a staple of Minecraft, but they have been left to rot, which is terrible considering the IMPORTANCE of them! So, My rework would be this: The Eye of Ender would lead you to a guaranteed room, the Center of a End Stronghold. There, there can be up to 4 paths, a path going down, one going up, and two paths to the side. One of these paths will take you to the End Portal Room. Id request for End Strongholds to be given more layouts and rooms, as well as updates to the general building style. Add some red wool for the floor, and in hallways, have a few spawners with Cave Spiders and zombies, to make the trip tougher. Have Soulfire Lanturns lighting up the hallways, and some arrow traps cleverly hidden with tripwires. Stronghold libraries should be a bit larger and grandiose, with cobwebs and the new bookshelves, perhaps even use them for secret entrances if you find the shelf for a room of loot! Endermen have a slightly increased spawn rate here as well.

Of course, at the end above lava is the End portal frame, with lava pouring at the sides. Make it look pretty using Deepslate, Purpur blocks, Gold and Diamond blocks, with a couple chests of end game loot. The End Stronghold deserves a lot of love for what it is about.

--- NETHER FORTRESSES

Nether Fortresses are also very important considering they're the only places Blaze can spawn. Now my proposal is simply, use the new Netherbrick blocks, and make the flooring Red Netherbrick, or have the bottom sides be used. Nether Fortresses are a bit hard to play in due to how dark the blocks are. I'd also make them form in a more grid-like structure. Every chunk, the Fortress attempts to generate either a hallway in the correct direction, stairs, a unique piece, or a dead end.

Unique Pieces would include the Lava Well, Blaze Room, Netherwart Gardens, Netherwart Tree room, Room Splitters, Staircases, or Large Rooms. Roughly 25% of Dead ends will end with a Blaze Cage room, and there's always one garunteed to spawn. There could be more types of special rooms, but this is just a general idea of how they could be reworked. Nether Fortresses that have hallways go down could twist into themselves and become multi-layered, making them not as flat as they usually are.

If a Nether Fortress is spawned in a Soulsand Valley or Warped Forest, the Nether Fortress would be made out of Warped Netherbrick (A block I'm adding :)), and Blazes become Soulfire Blazes. They'll be stronger but drop more Blaze Rods, as well as more XP.

--- NETHER MINESHAFTS & PIGLIN SKELETONS

According to Mojang, Piglins have mined the ENTIRE nether out, and that's why there is no Netherite ore. However, I'd love to expand on that! Piglin Mineshafts are similar to normal mineshafts, but instead of being 3 wide and tall, it's 5 wide and 5 tall, with polished Basalt Pillars and Blackstone Brick roofs. They spawn at Y35 and below, and have a higher chance of Ancient Debris, Gold and Quartz!

However, this is not free, Piglin Skeletons spawn in this structure, and have recalled a bit of their old instincts. If you mine Gold, Quartz or Ancient Debris in a 4x4x4 area, they'll attack you. Netherrack is fine, however. Making barriers and or defeating them will let you reap the rewards of this structure!

--- PIGLIN EXCAVATION SITES

Piglin Excavation sites are very rare structures that create a wide pit with a spiral staircase to the bottom. There's plenty of ores to mine, and jn the center is a Piglin Watchtower with a bunch of golden tools, enchantment books, and weapons. These contain Piglin Brutes & Piglins. They go pretty deep and are rather large structures, about half the size of a Woodland Mansion. They only appear in Nether Wastes.

--- QUARTZ DEPOSITS

Quartz Caves spawn occasionally in the nether. they appear as slits, with Quartz Crystals, Nether Quartz Ore, and Quartz Blocks. there is also Packed Quartz Ore, blocks that give tons of Quartz and XP.

--- STRIDER DENS, ELDER STRIDERS, & RUBIES

in Nether Oceans, you can occasionally find a tube of Blackstone containing Striders and Elder Striders. In this tube are small pockets of Lava in a blackstone floor, being the Strider beds they rest at. Elder Striders are Striders whos hair has grown out, giving them bushy staches and eyebrows. They're neutral mobs, hurting a Strider or Elder Strider will not be without punishment, as they'll shoot out Lava Spitballs! These don't explode, but will light the player on fire for a very short bit.

In Strider nests, you'll find a new ore! Ruby Ore. Rubies are the Diamonds of the Nether, and can be used to make a Ruby Enchantment Table. Rubies can also be used on a strider to make them like you for a few minutes, gaining a speed boost and allowing you to control them, even without a saddle! Striders LOVE rubies, and collect them to decorate their homes. They'll follow you if you hold one in your hand as well.

--- GHAST GLOWSTONE PODS

On the roofs of the Nether, are LARGE deposits of Glowstone, hollowed out. These are Ghast Pods, homes of the Ghast. Ghasts have made a home similar to beehives, and roam around them. This makes small glowstone deposits into unfinished or abandoned houses for the Ghasts. They are a jackpot of Glowstone, but 1-3 Ghasts will always be around them, protecting their home.

--- NETHER PILLAR BIOME

The Nether Pillars Biome would be a Lava Ocean specific biome where large netherrack pillars are formed from the ceiling to the floor, this biome has no special features, but is a fun ambient biome.

--------- ITEMS & BLOCKS

Rubies can be found in Strider dens or rarely in Basalt Deltas. They can be used to make Ruby Blocks and Ruby Enchantment Tables. Giving them to a strider makes them happy, and allows you to ride them without a saddle for a short time, being almost akin to a Taxi. Ruby Ore is affected by Fortune.

Red Netherbrick will be given a full set, and Warped Netherbrick will be added and also have a full set as well. Soulsand can be made into Soulsandstone, and get a set as well.

Condensed Nether Quartz is a rare block in Nether Quartz Slits, and contain 6 Quartz, and gives a LOAD of XP. They are affected by Fortune.

Nether Cattail Stems and Nether Cattail Pods are a block that can be placed, Pods can be stepped on and deal damage akin to a Berry bush. Cattai Stems are like Sugarcane, and be turned into Sugar or Paper, and the Pods can be used for exploding into Dyes, or crafted into Arrows as a flint replacement!

Iron can now Oxidize into a brown-red rust. I've always dreamed of having iron rust after Copper was given this ability. Oxidized Iron would be a different flavor, which would be perfect for spooky industrial buildings, or showing a different kind of age.

Copper is a item & block that needs more general usage, and that will be the ability to substitute Piston's iron with Copper, or making Copper Anvils. Copper Anvils would have less durability then a typical anvil, and be made purely of Copper Blocks, but would fill the same purpose. Copper can also be used as a substitute for Iron in a few more recipes, lightening the amount of Iron a player needs to use, and giving copper some more strength for usage.

-------- THE END --------

Thank you so much for reading my silly little wishlist of things! I was bursting with ideas and have been working on this for about a week. I just wanna expand on existing features and or re-work a few of them to truly let them shine! I added in a lot of new nether mobs, mostly because the Nether Update was one of my favorite updates, but it needed just one more kick to get it fully topped off! The Lava Oceans needed just a small push! Eventually, I'll see about making some concept art for these mobs, structures and biomes! But with that said, I'd love to hear thoughts on these mobs, structures and general reworks! ^-^

[puppetmaster13u]

Okay ngl I am actually sort of excited to draw these lol

Batman (Bruce) Phantom   -Body partially translucent -Can shift to a ‘Phantom’ form -Can go intangible & invisible in phantom form -Higher metabolism when in phantom form -Allergic to sunlight

Agent A (Alfred) Wolf   -Far better night vision than humans -Higher metabolism than a human -Thicker skin & greater power at night -Naturally mainly carnivorous

Batwoman (Kate) Megabat   -Has echolocation & better night vision -Large wings allow for flight & less damage from falling -Obligatory partial frugivore 

Nightwing (Dick) Feline   -Lands on feet (fall damage what’s that) -Can jump higher/farther than human -Can see slightly better in the dark

Oracle (Barbara) Deer   -Increased healing within forested areas -Can leap higher & naturally has larger strides -Hooves help with falling/climbing 

Red Hood (Jason) Strider   -Immune to fire & can walk/swim in lava -Naturally herbivorous -Slower & weaker when cold -Naturally afraid of large bodies of water

Chances are I will have more to draw after these lol

Had a random idea for giving DC characters (specifically Batfam) abilities/weaknesses using Origin mods (From Minecraft). Getting random origins and trying to write drabbles or design things.

[kawaiijohn]

A short train of thoughts fic for 4/13

It's the anniversary of the thing that changed my life, how I met the most important people to me, how I found the people I want to spend my life with.

How I figured out who I am, who I like, and how it relates to the pride flags I decide to fly.

How I relate to the world around me and shaped my sense of humor.

It's the namesake of my blog, my online identity. I will never change it, no matter how cringe or childish it looks to me now.

Keep in mind I have refused, staunchly, to read the epilogues or interact with homestuck^2, this fic is what I wish had happened.

Here we go

A young man stands in his bedroom.

He looks at his hands and swallows.

It is not his thirteenth birthday, but he remembers it well.

He wishes he didn't, but without it, he wouldn't be the same man.

It was all so fun, at first, but childish glee turned to horror quicky. And the smell of frosting and baked goods were soon followed by smoke and ash and fire.

He closes his eyes and breathes- one thing he remains masterful of. He breathes, but phantom iron and oil coats the inside of his nose and he tastes it in his throat.

He opens his eyes.

He is still in his room.

He breathes in relief.

Thirteen years has helped with the painful memories. And so has the therapy.

Lots and lots of therapy.

The Rose of back then would have picked and prodded as to why it took so long, but the Rose of now is proud of him. He's proud of her as well.

How fucked is it that the shit they'd been forced to endure by an uncaring universe shaped them into what they needed to be? The hero's journey (God he only had a middle school Earth education still) is absolute horseshit.

If he hadn't already met a certain Troll or been a God himself, he'd refuse to believe any sort of God exists in the first place. But it doesn't mean much to him anyways, because he refuses to believe a higher power or fate or the universe or whatever the fuck is anything but caring or good after what happened.

According to Rose (and her wife), it happened to her grandparents too. According to her, they'd somehow decided to continue celebrating holidays that honor God after enduring Earth's darkest tragedy but remained atheist up until they passed when she was a baby.

Something about traditions being more important than belief, but it's not like their little group has many beliefs left besides what their parents taught them.

He laughs, she always tries to comfort him about that, but it doesn't matter all that much. Not when he's finally able to see the good that came out of the whole situation.

The memories have faded, but his friends remain vivid technicolor to his dull world;

The orchid bright of wretched tongues and the weird smell of a handmade scarf. Black and lilac and orange swapping in his mind like she swaps her yarn's colors.

The vivid ruby of heat and throbbing bass, the sound of laughter twinged with southern drawl. The sharp sarcasm and wit that flows naturally between them.

The toxic lime of petrichor and moss, the snort-laughter of a sister he didn't know he wanted. The comfort of babbling on about special interests and the semantics of bullshit fantasy science.

They're his rocks. His comrades. His partners in crime.

He's glad he got to meet them, he just wishes it would have been under normal circumstances.

He daydreams of waiting at an airport with an oversized sign that reads "Mr. Strider" while he wears his Groucho glasses and his dad chuckles beside him. Of picking up Jade from an airport after somehow managing to get a flight, watching her nap on the car ride home. Of flying out to New York and being able to see NYC before it became a pile of rubble.

He wipes a few tears from his eyes and laughs.

He's working on it- letting himself work through the grief of missing his childhood, losing out on everything people should have gotten, of how many people vanished because the universe decided it was time to die.

A young man stands in his bedroom.

He's glad he has the privacy to cry it out this time- that he has to hide up in his old bedroom, he doesn't want to worry his friends before everyone else arrives.

Having to hide from everyone is a huge improvement. Because it's better than spending another birthday alone.

He can hear someone walking up the stairs. He steels himself and dons the traditional party hat he makes sure to get every year.

"Hey ass hat, why are you sitting in the dark?"

"Oh, uh... hey Dave! Is it dark already?"

His boyfriend stares at him like he's grown a second head. "Dude you've been up here for an hour, Terezi said she's almost here and you have Roxy down there staring at the cake with actual stars in her eyes. No idea how the fuck she does that but it's real weird, like anime bullshit or something. Kinda makes me wanna see if it's genetic or some shit, give you the anime ugu kawaii eyes and see if it seduces you more or something."

Dave tries to drape his body over his, but he just snort laughs and pushes his boyfriend away. "Okay yeah that's pretty fucking weird, also you don't need to seduce me bro. We're in this for the loooooooong haul."

Their play fight is interrupted by another two people entering the room.

"I'm impressed that you managed to pronounce eight os in that, John. She'd be proud of you."

"Pfft Kanaya, we all know sky Vriska is real and watching at all times! She'd slap me over the head if I didn't at least try!" John responds from the headlock Dave has him in.

He looks and sees as the rest of their group crowds behind Kanaya and Rose in the doorway.

"Hey when did everyone else get here?" he asks.

"We've all been waiting on you, numbnuts! Terezi was the last to arrive and we come up here to see you pseudo black-flirting with our matesprit!" Karkat huffs.

"Boyfriend, not matesprit."

"WHATEVER!"

"John, are you actually okay? You've been up here for an hour..." Rose asks. "We all worry about you on your birthday, but we know you've been doing better lately. We just worry." She walks over to his bed and takes a seat, patting for him to join her.

He does, and Dave sits next to him, propping his long-ass Strider legs over their laps. It's not long before Jade hops up behind them and drapes over the back of him. And then Kanaya. Then Terezi, and Jane and Roxy, and soon everyone is on his childhood bed crowding him (even Dirk!! Wow!!)

John wipes tears from his eyes.

"You guys are too nice to me. I'm such a jerk sometimes and I really didn't wanna make you worry, but I always get this way on my birthday, this is just the first year we're all together and I'm not alone. I just didn't want everyone seeing me have flashbacks and ruin their day."

"Ruin our day? Chum, you're the birthday boy, if anything it'd be ruining Jane's day, and she's too caring to give a damn about that when it concerns stuff like that!" Jake mumbles from under Roxy.

"Precisely. We're here for you, whether you like it or not." Jane responds from behind Calliope. "Just don't be a jerk and leave us guessing, let us know you're not doing well next time."

"Dude if anything you're the most valid person to be having issues with his birthday. Who else of us had all of their planet fucking explode on their birthday?" Dirk muffles from under someone else. "Shit, your trauma is old enough to get it's name today, that's an accomplishment. Congrats to your trauma, let's name it something like "zoosmell" or whatever the fuck"

John starts to laugh but then feels the tears flow for real, not able to wipe them away fast enough.

The group pulls him in for a hug and he feels like things will finally be alright.

A young man sits in his bedroom.

It was 26 years ago that he was given life, but 13 years ago that he was given a name.

Today, on the 13th of April, he finally realizes his life is getting better, all with the help of his friends and family in a cuddle pile. He finally let's them see how vulnerable he truly is.

It may not be today, nor tomorrow, but soon this young man will be able to heal fully. For now, it is still his birthday, and there's a celebration to be had.

==> John: Celebrate Life with your Friends

[END]

[nat1vibes]

@manygalaxiesinone thank you for asking me this and i shall use the same template as you for ease. (might have missed some)

(inspired from this post)

Disgaea Generic Classes/monsters i'd hang out with!

Warrior: NEATHER YEAH! just coz im biased and couldn't say no. he could help me get into the mindset of working out! and... maybe get me one of them deals with the god of combat

Valkyre: Probably-maybe not. If she is as tsundereish as she seems then it would be a maybe not. But she is still kinda just a dorklike M warrior, so prob yeah!

Martial Artist: wouldn't hang out more than just maybe sparing with them to learn from them, or tea together.

Fight Mistress: yeah! but they seem a bit too high energy for me

Magician: Neather Yeah! we would be nerding out so much! and i'd love to see how magic is studied, even if i couldn't do it

Witch:...the gothic lolita is stronger than my ablity to see red flags. So yes i would. Maybe i'd just be her goofer but its fine

Clergy: yea. lil cute booger. He don't got anything wrong

Cleric: yeah! they are prety calm. maybe though i wouldn't find that much in common with us

Ninja: maybe. He seems cool. but like. trained assassin? can they have fun? would they not kill me?

Kunoichi: same as ninja

Samurai Male/Female: Loyal! pretty calm most of the time. Good friends to have around

Ranger/Strider: Cool guy, we could vibe

Archer: Not sure. she seems nice. But i might find them annoying after a while. Probably my fualt

Magic Knight: Sure! she is just great! i can't imagine they would like me much though.

Thief Male/Female: i'd maybe do some panks with them and that's it. I don't wanna stay close enough to be a target

Angel Male/Female: Hate them.

Gunner: Wild west nerd, we could vibe

Gunslinger: Smh Merchant from Phantom brave just dressed difrently. i dont trust her

Armor knight Male/Female: Yes! i will feel so at ease when being around them!

Beastmaster: Greaat gal. I'd love to hang out with the more dangerous monsters through her

Sorcerer: Ok ok, curses, voodoo. But she so cute tho! I'll overlook my lower lifespan

Masked Hero: Nah, posers

Professor: sure? but it's an other one of those that i don't thing we will hae much t otalk about. If she tries to teach me math i'll pocket sand her and run away

Psychic: she looks like a Chuunibyu. We vibing

Mecha Girl: Maybe? but idk

Sinner: i'd be afraid , they pretty scary

Prinny: i'd feed them like. 2 sardines PER DAY. With the profits i make from thier labour, i'd contiue to amass a following and be treated as prinny Jesus. Valvatorez will have t ofind me and try to change my ways.

Cheerleader: dont know alot about her. But id be worried where to look and be uncomfortable

Android: Nah. ill save my life to kill it with an other calss that would hate me

Necromancer: yes. Again lolita fashion wins

Medic: sure! I'd even go as far as trying out on flied medic assistant

Maid: HELL YEAH! Nat1vibes loredrop. Monstergirls are one of my weaknesses. And maid. Are an other one

Wrestler: Not alot. But i'd for sure let him coach me. work out together. he could lift me and my spirits!

Pirate: nah. Posh dudes

Dark Knight: YES. yeah yeah emo. But they are my chuunin babies. I'd play pretend with them

Sage: yeah! Give me multy attack!

Geomaster: nah. Hated those Old farts. Disgaea 2 item world was made a pain

Majin:Maybe? maybe not...depends if they seem me as like, a lowly human they might develop feelings like those of a pet rat. Or just kill me.

Bouncer:My own body guard!

Onmyo monk: Uptight smucks that think they are better than everyone? I'll slug him one! and die... coz they are high ranking

EDF soldier/Battle shuit:Literlly just human dudes. Depends on the guy

Kurtis bot:Maybe? probably not

Asagi(d5):Only if i could somehow make them belive, i am the true Asagi of an other dimention. That came here to find the TRUE asagi

Spirit: yeah...Kinda, they look lonely

Undead: nah. Zombos. Bleh. ''But nat1, you said yes to the mai-'' ''I'll slug you one''

Dragon: If they don't see me as a threat or food. Sure. Big guys. Seem to give nice hugs. Also... a point i missed. MAGICHANGE D2 SPEAR! D4 SWORD!

wooden Golem: Yee. nice tree bros

Lanturn: they look kinda scary. But they chill we vibing

Living Armor/Horseman: I wouldn't mind. But they probably won't find any value in me.

Felynn: Yeah! cat ladies! just hope they don't break me accidentally

Succubus: nah. Hang out? Well... Maybe. NO, they just out for my soul.

Gargoyles: i wouldn't mind one guarding my house

Nether Noble: maybe? Not like Sherafinas dad. But they aren't that bad. I remmember that lil oiky boy in d1

Orc: Only if they don't think they can mess with me. lil fart boys

Winged Warrior/If you mean mothman: Nah. I'd fall assleep to easely. not good for the slumber party

Flora Beast: yeah. I don't see how it could go bad

Roc: nah. Sorry. too smelly a breath

Rifle Demon: maybe if i could win their faivour with alcohol

Nosferatu:vampire dudes? nah. they would kill me

Feary: lil fae boys. Sure. adorable!

Sludge: nah. Slime

Shroom: nah. Again i dont wanna fall asleep when disgaea ppl are REAL!

Mythical Beast: Yeah! doggo!

Slumber Cat/Deathsabbers: i mean. They are just cats. Sure

Reaper: Well. they don't look only like they usually do. As we saw from Emizels dad. But still. They would probably kill me

Evil Eye: what even is this

Holy Dragon: Nah. too uptight about their pride

Imp: nah. lil shits

Fairy: Sure. lil guys

Rabbits: yeah!!! peaceful demons! yeee

Bear: YEEE big hugs! WAIT THAT A MOUTH in thier belly

Nine-tails: I mean... kitsune ladies

Twin Dragon: Again as with the dragon. MAGICHANGE SWORD

Zombie dragon: Yeah. looks evil. Probably is. But... they look so lonely and also kinda like. Friendable

[aikoiya]

HS AU - Prelude to Chaos

If it were my choice, I'd make SGRUB & SBURB all part of a giant illusion cooked up by Hussie who turns out to be a megalomaniac & the true main villain of the story because HE was the one who originally created the game first to make things more interesting.

This would be a crossover with Danny Phantom because of my hc that every franchise ever made is all part of the multiverse & the plane that connects them all is the Ghost Zone or Infinite Realms.

When Huss first created the game, he was living in a universe where Humans & Trolls were allies & Earth hosted quite a few Troll immigrants. Those included all the Trolls we've come to know, including the ancestors.

For example, the Sufferer, Kazien Vantas & the Disciple, Nyalin Leigon, are together & have 2 sons & 2 daughters all from the same clutch with Meulin being the eldest, Kankri the second eldest, followed by Karkat, then Nepeta. In Troll circles, when you choose a lifemate, you take on your partner's last name & clip it to the end of yours. Any wrigglers you have will take that name too & once they've grown up & have their own hive, they take on the last name of their parent of the same sex as them. This system applies to most of the others too.

Not to mention that Trolls were more mentally stable because of this & a lot of the ones we knew were different from how we remember them. Tavros, for instance, while still in a wheelchair, was far more self-assured & not in the false bravado way. Also, Karkat didn't hate himself. Sure, he could be a little depreciating at times & had some depression issues, but he didn't hate himself. He was also in a 3-way pan-quadranted relationship with Dave & Jade who always made sure to let him know how amazing they thought he was, which helped. Not to mention that Dave didn't feel the perpetual need to be cool at all times & allowed himself to be a dork on occasion.

Also, Kankri was in a mongamous pan-quadranted relationship with Jane. Dirk was in a flushed relationship with Equis & a pale one with Jane, Cronos was in a pale-tinted flushed relationship with Roxy, & Tavros was in a palemance with Jade.

More interesting things: Ambrose D. Strider & Roxanne Lalonde were married & had 4 kids; Roxy, the twins Dave & Robin, then Rose. Roxanne's sister, Rosemary, had a one-night stand with Daniel A. Verlaine, Bro's cousin, & they ended up with Dirk.

Roxanne & Ambrose then divorced & Roxanne is now dating Samuel Cooke (Dadbert) who lost his wife in an accident years ago & is the father of Jane & John. His twin brother, Dean Cooke (Dad Crocker), is the father of Jake & Jade. Their parents were Betty Crocker & Jackson Cooke. Jackson had another family with one Annabelle Claire before getting into a formal relationship with Betty, however it's speculated that he may have been cheating on his previous wife with the Crocker woman. It wasn't until Annabelle got sick & died that he got to marry Betty & have twin sons with her.

Anyway, Troll culture was vastly different than what it was in the comics & games mostly due to Hussie always making changes to it to suit his needs.

For instance, while Indigos were always religious & entertainment focused & tended to be more barbarians or berserkers (which, in real life were more shamanistic, being something like the Spirit Walkers from LoL & the Indigos were more so a mix of that & the classic idea of jesters, meaning the only person who could speak honestly with royalty & actually be allowed to keep their head provided that they do so in a humorous enough manner) in battle, they weren't intolerant clown-cultists that massacred thousands without reason & didn't wear makeup every second of every day. Rather, culturally, they actually tended to honor & celebrate the religious history of their cultures via festivals, stories, plays, & other events. They would also get tattoos depicting important moments in their lives, leaving their faces untouched, & wore war paint on their faces, but only during certain ceremonies or in times of actual war. It was considered disrespecting their ancestors to wear it at any other time.

There were also actual family units back then, but they tended to live in colonies where grubs & wrigglers weren't just taken care of by the family, but also members of the colony at large. It's very "it takes a town to raise a child" & gave a sense of community. This is because there was no SGRUB or SBURB back then.

Also, things like monogamous pan-quadrantism (or single pair relationships that fit into all four quadrants at once) were far more common & accepted. It was also understood to be very healthy mentally. Because of their empathy powers, Crimsons & Limes were far more likely to fall into these categories as shown by the Signless & the Disciple's relationship.

Also, incest was just as disgusting to Trolls as it is for humans. Mostly because of how it caused negative mutations in DNA. Huss is the one with weird ideas about it & was projecting his weirdness onto the Trolls.

Lusii were still a thing, but they were more like nannies & pets than anything.

Male/female matespritship pairs could reproduce together without the use of Mother Grubs, which were originally much smaller than in the comics & were mostly only used so kismesis pairs & same sex matesprit pairs could have grubs of their own.

It must be known that kismesis are unable to reproduce naturally on their own regardless of sex because it takes a lot of love humours to produce healthy grubs in that way.

Also, because of their less cynical nature at the time, Trolls believed in love instead of relegating it to mere pity.

At the time, the hemospectrum was less of a pyramid & more a line focusing more on balance. While Fuschias had always been in charge, so too had the Crimsons in order to balance out the power. The Fuschias represented the head of the coldbloods while the Crimsons/Limes represented the head of the warmbloods. The power of Limes & Crimsons is psychic empathy & the ability to share emotions. It was traditional for Fuschias & Crimsons in power to be in at least one quadrant together, preferably flushed or pale, as equal rulers in order to keep each other in check. Because of the Limes & Crimsons' more emotional-based ability, they were ideal for the part of therapists & peacekeepers, while Fuschias were the warriors. Crimsons & Limes also happened to be waterdwellers like the Violets & Fuschias, except they were most inspired by amphibians than fish & preferred fresh water. Limes couldn't survive too long in saltwater, but Crimsons could survive in it indefinitely.

Thing is, the Troll culture has been rebooted & satirized by Huss so many times that they have very little of their own culture anymore. They don't even remember their original creator god, Atalanti; a fusion god of dual nature that resembles the Hindu god Ardhanarishvara depicted as Shiva & Parvati fused together & the Greek god Hermaphrodite after his encounter with the water nymph, Salmacis. Atalanti is supposed to be a story of great love, the original god & goddess having gone through great relationship changes from enemies, to being mediated, to friends, to finally lovers that had mindblowing sex that disrupted the other gods' creations, at which point their fellow cosmic gods turn on them, punishing them by fusing the god & goddess together, creating Atalanti. This is where the Troll concept of Quadrants comes from: a reflection of Atalanti's journey through relationships.

Story goes that the punishment backfired as Atalanti was thrilled by their new existence in a similar way to how Garnet from Steven Universe was. Atalanti then went on to create the original Troll homeworld & Trolls themselves.

In reflection, Crimsons & Fuschias were specifically created in Atalanti's image; Fuschias typically being female-oriented hermaphrodites & Crimsons being male-oriented hermaphrodites.

Now, Trolls have lost that connection with their past & all they have is the Dark Carnival.

Think about the actual naming conventions for bands & whatnot of Alternia. "Troll Green Day?" "Troll Will Smith?" It's all just Huss (in-universe Huss, that is) being too lazy to be more creative & research actual Troll bands & actors.

Huss created a virtual reality game by striking a deal with the eldritch horrors living in the Void or Unworld separating universes from each other & the Ghost Zone. This deal would allow him to trick kids into causing a manufactured doomsday for the universe they lived in, with the promise of creating a new world that they could mold to their whims. The reality is that the game is a parasitic reality-twisting computer virus meant to invade preexisting universes at the dawn of their creation & when it gets there with the help of naive children, it uses the time between absorbing the creation energy of the universe before starting the game up again, destroying the old universe, giving the energy to the horrors who then use it to expand the Unworld, & move on to the next.

The dream bubbles are actually meant to imprison 'dead' players in the Void & keep them from moving on to the Ghost Zone where they would've started on their Journey of the Soul(TM). (For more details, go read my 'Explaining the Ghost Zone' post.)

The game has been recycling the same characters over & over again, creating worse & worse situations for them until the events of the comics took place.

(A/N: Also, Huss seems to have a bit of an obsession with the LGBTQ agenda & feels the need to make practically everyone gay to some extent. I just find it strange that John is legitimately the only straight character in a healthy relationship. The only other canon straight relationship was Dadbert & Momlonde & we all know how that ended.)

(It just feels like a needlessly woke stab at heterosexuality. Like, we're somehow the enemy or something.)

(I'm not about to tell anyone how to live their lives, but it just feels very unbalanced.)

(Also, his obsession with a president that's only real contribution was a botched attempt at free medicare & spent most of his time in the white house on vacation, troubles me.)

Now, listen, I'm not normally a proponent of Death of the Author, being the type who generally tries to respect the creator, at least to a degree, but depending on the situation, I might suspend such habits for a time.

HS Masterlist

[ask-those-dumbasses]

Mob Masterpost

I’ve gotten many asks about the mobs in this world, and I figured I might as well list them since there are a good chunk I removed, as well as custom lore for some. These will probably be paired with pictures one day, we’ll see. 

Passive Mobs  

Bat 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Cat

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Axolotl 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Chicken 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Fox

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

All the fish (and more) 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Turtle

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Cows 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Horses / Donkeys 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Skeleton Horses (not zombie ones they freak me out)

- Literally just the skeleton of a horse nothing interesting here 

Pig

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Parrot 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Sheep 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Rabbit

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Mooshroom / Moobloom 

- Mooshroom exist as they do in game

- Mooshroom are found around massive dead trees in damp forests. They can also be found in mushroom biomes 

- In flower fields are a subspecies of Mooshroom, the Moobloom - which have many different varieties depending on the flower (but there are mainly yellow ones) 

- Mooblooms co-regulate with bees 

- Mooshrooms just need to break down dead plants for nutrients.  

- Mooblooms just need sunlight and water 

Striders 

- Co-regulate with Piglins, who keep them safe. In return Striders are a popular form of transportation (very big) to get around the large lava lakes in the Nether. 

- Eats the mushrooms and plant life of the nether (the plant’s spores stick of their bodies and travel to grow and shit).

- They can easily swim through lava using their big, duck-like webbed feet.  

- They get too cold and freeze up if they’re outside of lava for too long.  

- Strider babies like to ride on their parents backs. 

__________________________

Neutral Mobs 

Goat

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Dolphin

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Piglin

- Already done 

Panda 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Polar Bear 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Wolf 

- exist as they do in real life (no art needed) 

Bee 

- Most are just normal bees like in real life  

- There are, however, rare large square bees-like creatures that roam around the world. These creatures only attack when attacked, and can be tamed to ride on by people (think like Appa from Avatar).

- They can mentally control other, smaller bees if they desire (think like the Alphas in HTTYD2) 

- Every 10 years; there is a small chance of seeing The Elegant White Beefly/ The Queen bee and other rare bees flying around. 

(CONCEPT ART PROVIDED BY LLEN_BEE)

Endermen 

- These are void creatures that are made by the Enderdragon 

- They have no real thoughts or will of their own and are not considered to be fully conscious or aware. 

- They are a collective hivemind under the command of the Enderdragon 

- It’s rumored that the Enderdragon sees through their eyes. When Endermen fly into rages due to making eye contact with people, it’s said that’s the Enderdragon, trying to exact her revenge on humanity.

Iron Golem

- Iron Golems are man-made guardians/ machines built to protect villages and trader outposts from monsters at night. 

- They’re considered to be gentle giants, only attacked when they’re provoked. They’ve even been known to pick flowers to give to children as a gift.

- They are, however, extremely powerful and bulky, and are not to be casually messed with. 

__________________________

Hostile Mobs 

Zombies & Skeletons (They're basically the same thing)

- Literally just dead people idk what to tell you 

Drowned 

- Literally just Water Dead People™  

Spider (only cave ones) 

- Literally just extra big spiders that live in caves congratulations

Creeper

- They’re a conscious mass of moss / plant life.  

- They spread their spores by exploding near living things and attaching the seeds to those things. The seeds grow from these. This is why it is important to clean your clothes well after encountering one. 

Elder Guardian + Guardians

- These are ancient magical sea creatures that were made by the gods. They were made to guard Sea Temples from outsiders. 

- Guardians watch over the outside and most of the inside under the Elder Guardian’s command. 

- The Elder Guardian's eye can cause time to slow for the person whose gaze it lands on. After tests it has been confirmed that it simply feels this way to the victim, time does not actually slow.

Ghast 

- An eternally crying spirit of the nether. They are extremely dangerous and hostile if they spot you, since they are able to spit liquid fire from their mouths. 

- Their tears are made of liquid silver and are extremely valuable if you can manage to collect them. 

Blaze

- These creatures are created inside nether fortresses by odd objects called “spawners.”

- They’re made of fire, smoke, and bright, eternally hot metal they can use to swing around to harm their opponents. This metal is commonly referred to as “Blaze Rods”  

- They guard nether fortresses with their lives, willing to sacrifice anything to protect them. 

Hoglin 

- They’re considered the elephants of the nether; very strong, very destructive, and potentially deadly. 

- Warped fungi are a tasty treat for Striders, but are extremely toxic to Hoglins. Because of this, they have developed a fear to the signature pattern of the warped fungus. 

- They eat / scrape against wood and plants for food as well as to sharpen their tusks. 

Phantom

- They’re small nocturnal creatures who live up in the trees . 

- They make nests out of bones they find, and mostly eat bugs 

- They’re very shy, and only come out to try and “help” other creatures get sleep at night. 

Shulker

- Very tiny, almost pixie like creatures that live in the ancient ender cities. They build themselves purple shells to hide away from danger. 

- Their shells are made from a mixture of sticky saliva and mucus, and plant matter from chorus tree plants. 

- They are able to spit out a sticky magic chemical that cause people to start floating into the air. The only way to get out of this is to wait for it to wear off.

Slime

- They’re mutant creatures made of a translucent ooze. The color can change depending on where they originated. 

- The lighter, outside ooze is very sticky, but also has bouncing properties. The inside, darker layer of ooze is very toxic and can dissolve metal. 

- While smaller ones are basically harmless, bigger Slimes can be very deadly. They trap it’s prey inside it’s body to immobilize it, and digest it alive.

Wither Skeleton

- These are skeletons that have had prolonged exposure to soul sand, turning black and “withered.” They also have a small blue fire in their chest. 

- They’re faster, stronger, more deadly and more hostile then regular skeletons, and are known for pursuing their targets over long distances. However, their bones are slowly withering away.

- Only fresh wither skeletons are fully intact. This is why it’s so hard to get fully intact wither skulls. 

The Wither

- When three wither skulls are combined with a great amount of soul sand, and is lit with soul fire, a Wither is born. 

- It’s an ancient creature built for only one purpose, to destroy and kill all life it sees

- Long ago, all the Piglin tribes came together to defeat a Wither that was rampaging across the Nether. Ancient writings of how it came to be were drawn along the walls of Nether Fortresses. 

- The tears of a Wither makes Wither Roses - an apology to the lives it has taken. 

- Nether stars, which appear once a Wither is defeated, can be used to make beacons. They can also be used to make Totems of Undying, when it’s combined with god-blessed liquid gold, and an emerald pure of corruption.

[morsartis]

Lights Part 1

There was nothing quite like going for a random walk. The urge hadn’t hit you for a very long time- so long in fact a small tremor of fear shot through you. It couldn’t be him. He’d been destroyed with the creation of the new worlds and the new timeline. Simply put, there wasn’t a way for him to reach through the ever calling void to pluck your strings. But for a moment you were reminded of your time on Alternia. You’d traversed that planet in a mind controlled haze and it was an experience that left you shaken. One you never wished to experience again. So when the urge to get up and go somewhere hit you it had taken you an embarrassingly long time to calm your racing heart. It was an ordinary urge, one that didn’t mean you were back under his control. Still, you were anxious as you stepped out of your front door. Your little corner of the world wasn’t all that exciting. A welcome reprieve from the constant action Alternia had given you. As it was, the neighborhood was as calm as any other day. Afternoon sunlight filtered over the houses and across the sidewalks giving everything a warm feeling. There was no reason for your anxiety. Even so, you took careful steps. You weren’t interested in making friends this time around. Just going for a simple walk. Your coat kept the autumn chill off and you were happy about your sturdy boots. Both had cost you pretty penny but the price had been well worth the quality. It also helped that they looked damn good on you. 

It took less time than you remembered to reach downtown. Everything a steady stream of people and activity. People were no doubt doing last minute shopping. You wandered down the streets with no particular destination in mind. There was a little hole in the wall coffee shop not too far away that you liked to frequent. They had some of the best drinks and their prices didn’t leave your wallet openly weeping. Then there was the bakery not too far away that had the best donuts you’d ever had. Among all the shops there was plenty to choose from that you’d enjoy. You decided to go to the coffee shop first. The darker lighting and overstuffed armchairs hidden in the corners were exactly what would set your mind at ease. They had no bell to alert them to customers- music soft but unmistakable floated through the air. That wonderful coffee smell permeated the building and it took little time for the barista to get your drink made and hand it to you. Dropping a tip into the tip jar you took your drink and sat in the furthest arm chair you could find from the door and the drink station. As far as anyone was concerned you were simply part of the backdrop. Pulling out your phone you scroll through the latest news feeds and try not to lose your will to live. Things will always keep happening and quite frankly you aren’t sure how much you can take anymore. Or rather, what was that popular quote? Something about drawing a line somewhere and looking deep inside of yourself for what you’re willing to put up with today. Either way it isn’t this shit. 

You’re so engrossed in the latest bullshit your country is spouting you almost don’t notice the new occupant of the coffee shop. Almost. Too many years being on a hair-trigger of flight or fight have engrained a deep sense of your surroundings. Even if they hadn’t you’d recognize this particular customer anywhere. Her hat is pulled low over her face and her steps purposely soundless. You both know that the barista and the other customers haven’t noticed her. There is only the steady swish of her coat as she walks and even that is drowned out by the music. You look down at your phone and watch her out of your peripherals. She takes a seat across from you as silent as a phantom which is just the way she likes it. You both know that you’ve seen each other. She makes no move to talk and neither do you. If she sought you out then that means there’s a problem. None of your other friends had reached out to you and while you hadn’t attempted to hide you made no move to reach out first. It would be a long time before you felt secure enough to reach out first in your friendships again. 

“He’s gone.” She says barely a whisper. You bob your head in a nod. Its a statement not a question. “I’ve managed to keep tabs on all of our mutual acquaintances.” 

“I expected nothing less from you.” 

“Adalov has been cyberstalking you.” That makes you glance up. There’s the barest hint of an amused smile on her lips. You raise a brow for her to continue. You weren’t completely unaware but if Boldir is bringing it up then its more significant than you gave credit for. 

“He’s been methodically going through every scrap of information about you he can get his claws on.” She pauses to take your drink from you and take a sip, you let her because despite everything you still consider her a friend. You’re pretty sure she knows this too. “He started out doing so of his own volition, however, I believe an acquaintance of yours- Dirk Strider- is also cyberstalking you. Adalov has taken note of that and started stalking him as well-,”

“Which in turn means Dirk is stalking him.” That almost makes you laugh, the two of them stalking each other to see what the other is up to is just the type of Spy vs Spy bullshit that only leads to further shenanigans. Even Boldir has a look that says she thinks its equally as amusing. The two of you sit in a momentary silence. A comforting thing you’d almost forgot to miss. Now it settles around you like a warm blanket. Taking your drink back from Boldir you take a sip. 

“I have a feeling Adalov and Strider will try and contact you at some point soon. I thought...” She hesitates for a moment- eyes darting, “I thought I should warn you so that you aren’t caught by surprise. I know the control he had over you has made you wary.”

“Boldir... I may not have reached out but that doesn’t mean I’ve missed you any less. I can’t bring myself to be the first to reach out. Not after... Everything that happened on Alternia. But I’d never turn away a friend.” You reached across the little table to hold her hand. Her claws dig into your skin with how hard she grips it back and you watch the way she relaxes. It’s almost enough to break your heart. 

“Would you like to go on a walk with me?” She asks, voice uncharacteristically fragile. You smile as you stand up with your drink. 

“I’d love to.” 

[saybyebus]

reviewing minecraft mobs

reviewing all the minecraft mobs because i'm stressed and want to forget the real world exists

bat unpopular opinion but i think it's cute. still doesn't erase that it always startles me in caves and flies into lava like an idiot. also will henceforth be tainted by coronavirus "jokes". 2/10

cat absolute perfection. cuter than cute. scares away creepers and phantoms, what more could you ask 10/10

chicken annoying sounds, but useful for feathers, and its smolness is admittedly endearing. 5/10 pls quiet down

cod i search for you but never find you, you are lost in literal seas and rivers of salmon instead. not worth the time i'm afraid 3/10

cow drops beef which i don't eat bc i don't like beef irl, but i do need the leather. now that piglin bartering is a thing though i don't really need to butcher cows for leather. so cheer up, pal! no need to look so sad 5/10

donkey a helpful friend! let's go on an adventure together 6/10

fox who gave you permission to be so cute? oh please let me be your friend, do not run away my precious screaming child 9/10

horse i'm so sorry my equine acquaintance, mojang did you really dirty with that model update. nevertheless, you're still a fun friend 6/10 docking points for that horrible model update

mooshroom you're a useful lad! but please stop staring at me with them big ol' eyes i'm scared 5/10

mule the best of both worlds! 7/10

ocelot mrow! i do miss the old days but cats are a tad more accessible now so i can't complain about that. have some fish my friend 7/10

parrot DANCING PAL, also the grey parrot is indisputably the best 10/10

pig a lad of simple virtues! i see you are going for the jack of all trades route rather than a niche role, which i can respect 5/10

baby piglin i’ve been robbed by an infant this is not okay 6/10

rabbit cute but far too skittish. also their drops are useful if you're stuck in a desert or want to make jump boost potions, but other than that they're more window dressing step up your game 4/10

salmon useful as food for myself and my cats but other than that, you're annoying 3/10

sheep ohohoho minecraft sheep are shaped like a friend!! woolly pals! i love 9/10

skeleton horse the epitome of cool but impractical. nevertheless you get points specifically because you are that cool 7/10

snow golem not useless! if you play your cards right this lad is quite helpful! and who can say no to that adorable grin under the pumpkin 5/10 not bad good sir

squid hello old friend from the oceans! i don't care what other people say, you're okay with me 6/10

strider absolute perfection. god's gift to humanity. the pinnacle of evolution. you had me at burrb. i will love you forever 1000000/10

tropical fish colorful boys! very unique! unfortunately a little hard to find but so neat to look at 4/10 ooh ah

turtle i am sworn to protect you and your offspring, solely because you are just that wonderful and your children are so impossibly cute 10/10

villager important to the lore but PLEASE shut up you weird land squidward 6/10 shut uppppp

wandering trader you are harder to get rid of than a jehovah's witness and for that you must be punished with a low score 3/10 for lore and blue ice i guess

bee another mob who is shaped like a friend! and a trans friend to boot! lovely and thank you for all your help i love you 11/10

cave spider I came here to look for name tags and i'm honestly feeling so attacked rn 1/10

dolphin a wholesome pal! it's fun swimming with you 8/10

enderman owowowo handsome lad! i will never kill an enderman because it feels like murder. you are all so noble even when you steal my flowers 11/10

iron golem stronk man! good at his job! but please not so zealous i hit that villager by ACCIDENT 6/10

llama gross noises, but still cute. great sense of fashion 5/10

adult piglin you are a very strange person, but i do appreciate your trades. i mean i don't even use gold but i'm glad you like it, also great lore potential 8/10

panda a vibrant buddy, and very cuddly looking. i will feed you bamboo and read you bedtime stories 8/10

polar bear stop being so mean i wasn't anywhere near your cub! mean bear, nasty bear! 5/10

pufferfish poke me again and i will turn you into a friggen lamp 1/10

spider aaaah spooky! big creepy crawly. but important so you get a good score while your cousin does not 6/10

wolf the OG best friend in minecraft, such a loyal pal, i love you my beautiful borker 10/10

zombified piglin this creature makes no sense at all and that's what makes them so great 6/10

blaze such an odd mob! but very useful and kind of fun to observe from a safe distance. spinning spikes are mesmerizing 8/10

chicken jockey no. i am going to find out whose idea the baby zombie was and send them a strongly worded letter 0/10

creeper like it or not, they're quite literally the face of minecraft. so much lore and fanart potential too! 9/10 i like this weird puppy but please stop "helping" me landscape my builds

drowned who allowed you to be so cool my gurgling adversary? you are so much better than the regular zombie 7/10

elder guardian one of the few mobs i have a weird respect for. i will leave your temple alone sir, no worries 9/10

endermite you are the literal worst, why do you even exist -2/10

evoker magic man! again with the lore potential, and some slick magic as well. gives unsuspecting players a run for their money 9/10

ghast please don't cry! i like unique mobs like this one. what is it? a weird cat? a giant hell squid? who knows! but i like it a lot 9/10

guardian i'm in the minority but i really like the danger fishies 9/10

hoglin angry pumbaa! why so mad? i don't even like pork so it's not like i'll hunt you 4/`0

husk this is literally just a more infuriating zombie, i don't like it, but points for looking like a desert monster and not something from a b movie 1/10

magma cube it's just the lava slime, but i can respect it, it has a charm of its own 5/10

phantom surely there are less murdery ways of getting me to sleep 4/10

piglin brute ohohohoho tough lady! not taking any of my bullcrap and protecting the bastion with your life. i can respect that 8/10

pillager i've shoved a pillager into a boat, broke its crossbow, and declared it my husband more times than i'd like to admit 10/10 so much lore potential and great action

ravager danger cow! very neat! and congratulations for conquering your fear of bunnies 9/10

shulker she's a sneaky girl! she's just trying to protect the end city give her some credit 6/10

silverfish you're awful but at least i don't have to encounter you that much -2/10

skeleton i hate you with every thread of my being, you suck the joy out of every moment and bring despair and rage to the world. while you clunk in pain as the sunlight purges your sinful form from the earth, i laugh with abandon. speed ye back to hell from whence you came, demon, and take your stupid bow and aimbot with you -9999/10

skeleton horseman no to the fourth power -9.9960006e+15/10

skeleton jockey spider good, skeleton bad. kill skeleton, spare spider. -100/10

slime squishy friend! probably not even hostile and just doesn't realize the danger of get squish. smallest ones make perfect pets 8/10

stray congratulations you big ol jerk you somehow managed to be worse than the normal skeletons. you're disgusting, i hate you, i'm gonna kill you, give me $200 -9999/10

vex talk about a meaningful name 1/10

vindicator please pick me up and break me in half over your knee you sexy beast 9/10

witch a powerful lady! the original illager. give her the respect she deserves 8/10

wither skeleton at least it doesn't have a stupid bow and its height is exploitable, and it drops skulls which is neat. still it administers the wither effect and that cannot be overlooked -5/10

zoglin never quite understood the point of this one, sorry 0/10

zombie boring. 1/10

zombie villager just. odd 2/10

ender dragon yaaaass queen slay! so impossibly cool 11/10

wither you're cool, but you're not as cool as the ender dragon sorry 7/10

giant this is literally just an overgrown zombie step up your game 1/10

zombie horse it's not as cool as the skeleton horse, sorry 5/10

killer bunny so very strange, but you know, i can appreciate that, you're okay 3/10

illusioner underrated and deserves to be added officially with the others, that's the tea 8/10

[timeflow]

fuck it, time to give info on mob spawning

been watching several videos & people playing minecraft and saw that a Lot of them have issues with spawnproofing builds and other things involving mob spawns, so here we go I guess

if you're not interested, scroll fast bc this post is longish

note that this only applies to java edition 1.16.x as some of these spawning rules are not the same in bedrock edition or even in java edition 1.15

GENERAL RULES

mobs can generally only spawn in an air block on top of an opaque block, which excludes partial blocks or transparent blocks like bottom slabs, open trapdoors, leaves (with one exception for this specific block), fences and gates, glass, carpet, etc, and most redstone components (redstone dust, buttons, pressure plates, etc.)

additionally, some mobs have requirements for the light level on a block, meaning they can only spawn if the light level in the air block they attempt to spawn in is below or above a certain value

note that given the way light levels work, "a distance of D blocks from a light source" means, for a distance from the light source on the x axis dx, a distance from the torch on the y axis dy, etc, then dx+dy+dz≤D, forming an octahedron shape of space where hostile mobs cannot spawn, the size of which changes depending on the light source

there are some exceptions to this rule, most notably every aquatic mob only needs to spawn within a water block in certain biomes and ignore the condition for having an opaque block underneath them, and some mobs ignore light levels

mobs cannot spawn within a radius of 24 blocks spherically around any player, and then they do not wander around if they are outside of 32 blocks from the player

mobs that spawn from a monster spawner can only spawn if the player is within 16 blocks of the spawner block, and will attempt to spawn 4 mobs every 10 to 40 seconds in a 3 block high 9x9 volume centered on the spawner block, only if there are less than 6 of that type of mob within a 9x9x9 volume centered on the spawner

mobs can only spawn in a space if they cannot be damaged within that space: for example, if there is a wither rose on top of a grass block, a cow would not be able to spawn there since it would immediately get hurt from the wither effect. likewise, mobs cannot spawn if there is not enough space for the mob to spawn, for example a zombie cannot spawn if there is a top trapdoor above an air block since it cannot fit there, however a creeper can spawn there since it is shorter than a zombie

mobs other than mooshrooms, phantoms, bats, wandering traders and their llamas cannot spawn in a mushroom island

OVERWORLD

hostile mobs can spawn where the light level is 7 or below, which basically means that any space within 6 blocks in any direction of a standard torch (excluding the torch itself) cannot have hostile mobs spawn in it in the overworld

the rates at which hostile mobs fail to spawn in the overworld is the light level on top of a block divided by 8, so a block with light level of 5 has a 62.5% fail rate, and a block with light level of 8 or higher has a 100% fail rate. hostile mob spawning additionally has a 50% chance of failing if the block has direct access to the sky (no blocks above it)

guardians can only spawn in the ocean monument's bounding box, which is a 58x58 area between y levels 39 to 61 inclusive, with no regard for the light level on the block, and only in a water block with a water block below it, regardless of whether or not it's flowing water. additionally, spawning fails 95% of the time if the block the guardian attempts to spawn in has no opaque blocks above it. to spawnproof against guardians, you can either remove all the water in the monument volume, and where there is water it must not be deeper than 1 block

slimes spawn in swamps at light levels below 7, following the same rules as other hostile mobs except that their spawn rates depend on the phase of the moon, with a full moon being a 100% chance of a slime spawning and a new moon being a 0% chance of a slime spawning, and they can only spawn in y levels between 51 and 69 inclusive. slimes additionally spawn in any slime chunks (except in mushroom biomes) below y level 40 with no regard for the light level and with a 90% chance of failure. spawnproofing against slimes in slime chunks can only be done by replacing all floor spaces with transparent or partial blocks

polar bears can spawn only in a frozen ocean or deep frozen ocean, on top of ice packed ice or blue ice, and only with a light level of 8 or above. spawnproofing against polar bears involves removing any ice blocks or keeping light levels below 8 (although this may cause hostile mobs to spawn)

passive mobs like cows, sheep, pigs and chicken can only spawn on the highest block at any given x,z coordinates, and only on grass blocks with a light level of 9 or higher in most biomes. ocelots can spawn on top of leaf blocks and grass blocks under the same lighting conditions in a jungle biome, mooshrooms can spawn only on mycelium in a mushroom island biome, turtles can spawn only on sand in a beach biome. to spawnproof against these mobs, the light level must be 8 or lower (although this may cause hostile mobs to spawn as well), or there have to be no grass, sand, mycelium or leaf blocks

aquatic passive mobs like fish, dolphins and squid can spawn in any water block with a water block directly above it, with no regard to the light level on the block, in an ocean or river biome. dolphins and squid additionally can only spawn between y levels 46 and 62 inclusive, and dolphins can only spawn in an ocean or deep ocean biome. spawnproofing against these mobs involves removing all the water in any river or ocean biome

bats can spawn in any air block below y level 63 where the light level is 4 or lower, unless the real date is between the 20th of october and the 7th of november, in which case the light level has to be 7 or lower. spawnproofing against bats involves lighting up caves and other underground areas so that the light level is above 4 in all areas

NETHER

nether mobs are primarily biome-specific, as no mob can spawn in all 5 nether biomes

zombified piglins and piglins can spawn in the nether wastes and the crimson forest on top of any opaque block at light levels 11 or lower. additionally, zombified piglins can spawn in nether fortresses in any biome. spawnproofing against these mobs involves having a light level above 11 at all blocks

hoglins spawn regardless of light level in the crimson forest. spawnproofing against hoglins can be done by either making all floor spaces transparent or partial blocks, or by creating pillars since hoglins need a 2x3 horizontal space to spawn in

magma cubes spawn regardless of light level in basalt deltas and nether wastes, or in nether fortresses. spawnproofing against these mobs involves replacing all floor spaces with transparent or partial blocks, or by making all areas have at most 1 air block vertically between opaque blocks.

ghasts can spawn regardless of light level in basalt deltas, nether wastes and soul sand valleys, and require a 5x5 and 4 block high volume to spawn in, and cannot spawn within a 16 block radius of another ghast. spawnproofing against ghasts involves making all areas have at most 3 air blocks vertically or 4 air blocks horizontally in one axis, or making the floor spaces transparent or partial blocks

skeletons can also spawn in the nether and have the same spawning rules as in the overworld, except that they spawn only in the soul sand valley and in nether fortresses, with 80% of nether fortress skeleton spawns being wither skeletons instead. spawnproofing against these mobs involves keeping the light level above 7 on all opaque blocks

blazes can spawn in nether fortresses only, and only in light levels of 11 or lower, except when spawning from a blaze spawner at which point it ignores the light level requirement. spawnproofing against blazes involves removing all blaze spawners and keeping light levels above 11 on all blocks, or using transparent or partial blocks on all floor spaces

endermen can spawn in the nether wastes and soul sand valleys, but most frequently in the warped forest, only in light levels of 7 or below. spawnproofing against this mob can be done by keeping the light level above 7 on all floor spaces, or by having a maximum of 2 air blocks between 2 opaque blocks (these opaque blocks can be blocks that endermen can pick up, but this may cause the area to slowly spawn endermen as they can remove the ceiling/floor)

striders are the only mob that can spawn in any nether biome, and on any lava block with an air block above it and a lava block below it, at y levels 31 and below. spawnproofing against striders involves either removing all the lava blocks below y level 32, or covering all lava blocks below y level 32 with any block (flammable blocks will work for this, but only if gamerule doFireTick is off)

END

in the end, only endermen spawn repeatedly, as the only other mobs, the ender dragon and shulkers, only spawn once. endermen follow the same rules as in the overworld and the nether

hope this can be helpful to people!

[liskantope]

Some brief (and sometimes not-so-brief) reactions to major Disney films 1937-1967

Around a month ago I made a temporary switch from Netflix to Disney+ with the goal of watching all major Disney movies in order, roughly paced so that one year of Disney film-making equals one day of real life. I should clarify here that by “major Disney movies” I mean mostly just all the animated ones plus a few hybrid live-action/animated ones, and a few of the most popular live-action ones (at least the ones I remember having a song considered good enough to feature on one of the Disney Sing-Along videos, a staple of my video-watching as a kid growing up in the 90′s). I would have been interested to see Song of the South, which I’ve never seen in its entirety, but it’s not included on Disney+ for fairly obvious reasons. As I get further into modern Disney, I’ll probably skip over most of the sequels and other features I strongly expect not to like (with the exception of Belle’s Magical World, which is said to be so legendarily bad that I just have to see what the fuss is about).

This time range of three decades happens to include more or less exactly those Disney productions that Walt Disney himself took a major role in (he died shortly before the final version of Jungle Book was finished). I’d like to do this again in another month, when I will have gotten up through the late 90′s, but honestly this post wound up way longer than I was imagining and took several more hours than I expected (or could really afford), so I’m not promising myself or anyone else that.

Looking at Wikipedia’s list of Disney productions, I’m a little taken aback at what a low percentage of these are animated features, which to me form the backbone of that company’s legacy; visually scanning the list makes the line of animated films look shorter than I had always imagined, but really what this is showing is that Disney produced far more live-action movies than I ever knew about, including (and perhaps especially!) in its early days. Right now I’m continuing on through the 70′s films, but this set of mini-reviews represents the first month of watching and three decades of Disney magic.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, 1937

This is the full-length feature that began them all and which had the burden of defying contemporary skepticism that a full-length animated feature could be taken seriously at all. We are already far beyond the earliest days of animation and have progressed lightyears beyond the quality of “Steamboat Willie��; throughout the film I marveled at the sophistication of the animation with a newfound appreciation of how groundbreaking a lot of the sequences must have been.

I know I watched this at least a couple of times in childhood and I think once when I was a bit older, but even that was long ago.

Snow White is based on one of the simpler classic fairy tales, and the writers had to come up with ways to flesh out this very short story enough to occupy well over an hour. This was done not by exploring the character of Snow White or the Queen or even filling in extra plot details (the fate of the hunter is never addressed) but by spending a lot of time on the dwarfs. The detail spent on individuating them took a lot of work from the animators, but I think their efforts paid off. I can’t say the same about the attention paid to Snow White or the Queen (pretty much the only remaining characters). Snow White has an almost entirely flat personality, with no sense of curiosity or concern whatsoever about the Queen’s designs to have her killed, just having literally only one goal in mind: to marry this Prince who she’d only seen for about two minutes and run away from out of shyness. (This is of course a trend we’ll see with Disney princesses for a long time.) The Queen similarly only has the goal of being “the fairest in the land”. Something about the particular harshness of her voice strikes me as The Quintessential 1930′s Female Villain Voice (“I’ll crush their bones!”), whatever that means -- maybe I got my idea of what this should be from the movie Snow White in the first place.

I still think “Heigh Ho” (which I’ve known well since early childhood) is an excellent song in its utter simplicity, especially when complimented with the “Dig Dig Dig” song (which I did not remember at all until a few years ago when a Tumblr mutual posted the excerpt containing it!). I’m not enormously fond of “One Day My Prince Will Come”, although I did enjoy playing it on the violin at a couple of gigs with one of my musician friends back during grad school -- I was convinced then, and up until watching Snow White just now, that it belonged to Cinderella.

Pinocchio, 1940

This was a favorite movie of mine in earlier childhood; we owned the VHS and I watched it a lot. As a child, I had no sense of one Disney movie coming from a much earlier time than another one; it was only much more recently in life that I understood that Pinocchio really comes from all the way back eight decades ago. Pinocchio taught me the meaning of “conscience” (both in the dictionary sense and in a deeper sense), and it shaped my notion of what fairies may look like -- for instance, my mental picture of the Tooth Fairy, back when I believed in her, was inspired by the Blue Fairy in Pinocchio.

It’s amazing just how much the quality of Disney animated features improved from the first one to this one, the second. It helps that both the story and the characters are far more complex than those of Snow White. The plot from the original book (which I’ve read in Italian and English) was more complex still, of course. There is one gaping hole where it’s never explained how Gepetto somehow found himself in the belly of a whale (I don’t remember whether or how this is explained in the book), but I’ll forgive that.

It’s interesting to see the 1940′s caricature of “bad (early teenage?) boy” shown in the animation and voice of Lampwick. Phantom Strider talks about the turning-into-donkeys scene as a notoriously dark scene for adults who didn’t find it as terrifying when they were children -- count me in as one of those adults! It’s especially terrifying to see the whole mass of boys-turned-donkeys being treated as slaves in the hellhole known as Pleasure Island and realizing that this is never going to be resolved in the movie -- it’s rather unusual in Disney stories for some great evil to be left unresolved with no recompense even for the chief villain. In fact, Pinocchio is pretty much the only Disney story I can think of where the worst villain doesn’t meet some kind of dire fate. Really, the range of Pinocchio’s view is much narrower: it’s just the coming-of-age story of one puppet in his quest for Real Boyhood. (And yes, I still giggle at how intricutely Jordan Peterson analyzes particular scenes from the movie to support his beliefs about neo-Marxism or whatever.)

Disney+ heads many of the descriptions of the older movies with “This program is presented as originally created. It may contain outdated cultural depictions.” I’m a little surprised they don’t do this with Pinocchio, given what appears to me a rather derogatory depiction of Gypsies.

“When You Wish Upon a Star” has become a timeless hit, for good reason. And I still find “Hi Diddle Dee Dee” extremely catchy.

Fantasia, 1940

I saw this one multiple times growing up (for earlier viewings, I was not allowed to see the final number “Night on Bald Mountain”). My mom, for her part, saw this in theaters at the age of around 4 (even though it originally came out long before she was born) and thought for years afterwards that there was no such film in real life and her memory of seeing it had been just a pleasant dream.

I have nothing much more to say about this one except that, representing a very different approach from most animated films, Disney or otherwise, 1940′s or otherwise, it succeeded exquisitely. The “Sorcerer’s Apprentice” number was particularly perfection; it was as though the composer originally had every motion of the story in mind when writing the music. At the same time, having the main character appear in the form of Mickey Mouse in some way seems to cheapen the effect.

The Reluctant Dragon, 1941

I watched this for the first time, not having known it existed. There isn’t really much to say. All that stuck in my mind was one of the shorts, “Baby Weem” (amusing in a disturbing way), and the longer segment which gives the movie its title (also amusing, in a different kind of disturbing way). It was especially interesting to see a 1940′s cartoon portrayal of a very effeminate man, or should I say, male dragon.

Dumbo, 1941

I saw this maybe two or three times growing up, and not in very early childhood. It was never one of my favorites. Later on, I learned that it was done very low-budget to make up for major financial losses in the Disney franchise. This definitely shows in the animation. However, if there’s one thing I can say in praise of Dumbo, it’s that it’s incredibly daring in its simplicity, not only to have such elegantly simple animation but in having a mute title character (instead the main “talker” in the film is the title character’s best friend, who had much more of a New York accent than I’d remembered).

In some ways I find this film incredibly cold and dark by Disney standards, for reasons I can’t entirely explain, and I remember feeling this way even on earlier watchings when I was much younger. The stark cruelty of the humans running the circus, as well as the elephants other than Dumbo and his mother, just really gets to me. (I vividly mis-remembered one of the lines I found most memorable in childhood as “From now on, Dumbo is no longer one of us.” The actual line is, “From now on, [Dumbo] is no longer an elephant”, which in a way, is even more chilling.) In this regard, there was no need to make a modern, woker remake of Dumbo containing an explicit anti-animal-exploitation message -- the 1941 version conveys this message loud and clear. Now that I’m writing this, I suppose it could be argued that this is another instance of what I described under “Pinocchio” of leaving a major evil unresolved in a Disney film. And apart from that, while the ending for Dumbo is meant to be a very happy one, as an adult I find it incredibly naive: Dumbo is now super internationally famous for his extraordinary gift and is entering the life of a child celebrity, and it’s just going to be smooth sailing from now on? I hate to say it, Dumbo, but your troubles are only just beginning. (I was glad to see Dumbo reunited with his mother in the last scene, however, which I hadn’t remembered happening at all.)

“Look Out For Mr. Stork” is a skillfully-written song I’d completely forgotten about for two decades or so but remember knowing well when I was young. I still think “When I See an Elephant Fly” is a fantastic song, especially with all its reprises at the end -- I’d had some bits of it confused in my memory but had kept the main chorus with me over all the years. Now it’s widely decried as racist, or at least the characters who sing it are decried as racist caricatures. For whatever my opinion is worth, I’m inclined to disagree with this, in particular on the grounds that the crows seem to be the most intelligent, witty, and self-possessed characters in the movie. I’m also pretty sure I heard critical things about it over the years which are false. For one thing, not all of the crows are played by white actors -- only the lead crow is, while the rest of the voices are members of a black musical group called the Hall Johnson Choir. Also, I’m not clear that the lead crow was actually named Jim Crow by the time the movie came out (no name is given in the movie itself). Now an earlier, much more forgettable song featuring black men singing about how they like to work all day and they throw their pay away... yeah that seems awfully racist.

Bambi, 1942

I have surprisingly little to say about this one -- it’s just very distinct from other Disney films of the time, in its story’s lack of magical elements, its characters all being animals and animated in to realistically model animals’ movements, its lack of musical numbers, and its plot reaching the same level of simplicity as that of Snow White. Not to mention actually having a benevolent character die, which I don’t think had been done up to that point. I remember watching this a couple of times as a kid; I was never terribly eager to watch it again and I feel the same way now, despite having majestic beauty that I can really appreciate.

The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad, 1949

This is the first of Disney’s animated features that I never had seen before. What a strange movie, or should I say, two smaller, unrelated movies rolled into one. I liked Mr. Toad’s half better than Ichabod’s half, or at least I found it more entertaining. I was brought up with the book The Wind in the Willows and recall seeing a non-Disney animated rendition of it (which was better and somewhat more thorough than this half-movie-length rendition). I was kind of excited when the “The Merrily Song” started because it unlocked a song from my early-childhood memory that I’d forgotten about for more than twenty years but knew from one of the Disney Sing-Along videos. I still think it’s a not half bad song, especially with the harmony.

The Ichabod story was not at all what I expected, not being familiar with the original book version (I had always assumed that Ichabod must be the name of a villain). I found it completely boring until the final horror sequence. As a child I would have found the courtship part even more boring (at least now I can muse on how man-woman courtship dynamics were shown in the late 40′s), and I would have found the horror part at the end very scary (in fact, maybe this is the reason my parents never showed the movie to me). It is a little shocking in being the only Disney story I’ve seen so far with a decidedly unhappy ending.

Cinderella, 1950

This one I only ever saw once or twice as a child. This is not counting a very vivid memory I have from around age 6 or 7 when I was watching a part of it over at another family’s house and their child, who was almost my age and nonverbal autistic, rewound and repeated the same 2-minute sequence involving the mice for probably about an hour (I was impressed because I at the time didn’t know how to work the controls of a video player).

I suppose this could be considered the second in the main trifecta of the most conservative fairy tale princess stories that Disney did in the earlier part of its history. I think one can argue that Cinderella has the strongest and most fleshed-out character out of those three princesses. I like the spirited internal strength she reveals in her very first scene. That said, like the other earlier princesses, she seems to have one singular goal in life, and that is to find her true love, not, say, to escape her abusive stepmother and stepsisters.

My reaction to this movie is overall positive. The mice were fun (I also like how their voices seemed a lot more like how mice “should” talk than in most other Disney cartoons); the dynamic between Cinderella and her evil relatives, and the dynamic between the stepmother and stepsisters themselves, was shown in a rounded way; and the fairy godmother is a great character despite having only one scene. The character of the king is pretty odd (very selfish yet his main dream is of getting to play with his future grandchildren) while not especially memorable or well fleshed out. There are certainly some great classic songs in this one -- not the most stellar that Disney has ever produced, but solid.

Alice in Wonderland, 1951

I was curious about what I would think of this one, since we owned the video of this at my home growing up and I watched it many times during childhood but as I got older I fell in love with the original Lewis Carroll books which, together, I often consider my favorite work of written fiction ever. I had not seen the Disney film Alice in Wonderland for around two decades, although I made the mistake of catching parts of more modern, live-action adaptations of the story more recently. I wondered what I would make of the old animated Disney adaptation after getting to know the books so well.

There is simply no way that any movie can recreate the true flavor of the books, but Disney’s Alice in Wonderland does a fine job of creating the general nonsensical, sometimes bewildering dream atmosphere, and, perhaps more importantly, capturing the essence of Alice’s personality. I give a lot of credit to Katherine Beaumont for this -- she has the major girl’s role in the next movie on this list as well, but she especially shines as Alice. Two other very distinctive voices, Ed Wynn as the Mad Hatter and Sterling Holloway as the Cheshire Cat, also add a lot to the cast of characters.

While mixing around some of the scenes of the original book Alice in Wonderland, with some scenes of Alice Through the Looking Glass inserted, the progression of the plot is a long, dreamlike sequence of strange situations with only a few common threads, true to the original first book (Looking Glass had a little, but only a little, more structure). In the movie, everything breaks down at the end with many of the previous scenes and characters swirling together and Alice frantically trying to wake herself up. One could object that this is not how the dream ends in the book Alice in Wonderland, but there is a similar sort of breakdown at the end of the dream in Looking Glass and it feels very real somehow, as in my experience this is sometimes how vivid dreams disintegrate.

Oh, and did you know that Alice in Wonderland has a greater number of songs in it than any other Disney film? There are nearly 25 that made it into the film, even if lasting just for seconds, with a around 10 more written for the film that didn’t make it.

So, does the Disney film do a good job of conveying one of my favorite books of all time, within the confines of being a children’s animated film? I would say yes. For reasons I described above, and from the fact that it manages to avoid working in a moral lesson for Alice, or depicting Alice as a young adult, or manufacturing an affair between Alice and the Hatter (ugh), like some film adaptations, I would say that this classic Disney version is the best Alice in Wonderland adaptation that I know of.

Peter Pan, 1953

Although I never knew this one super well, this movie has a special place in my heart from the way the flying sequence enchanted me in early childhood. I have to differ with the YouTuber Phantom Strider when he dismisses the 40′s/50′s-style song “You Can Fly” as just not doing it for him, because that song along with the animation of the characters’ journey to Neverland had a major hand in shaping my early-childhood sense of magic and wonder and yearning. I distinctly remembering a time, around age 6, when I just didn’t see much point in watching other Disney movies, or movies at all, which didn’t have flying in them, because what could possibly top the sheer joy and freedom of feeling able to swim through the air? I’ve had hardly any exposure to Superman, and so the kind of bodily flight I imagined in fantasy or performed in dreams was almost entirely shaped by Peter Pan. (At the same time, the crocodile in Peter Pan influenced my nightmares at the same age.)

I only ever saw this one a few times, but I distinctly remember the most recent of them being when I was a teenager, perhaps even an older teenager, and I remember thinking at the time that it was a pretty darn solid Disney movie. I still think the same now, while granting that some aspects of the movie seem a little antiquated and certain sequences with the Native Americans are quite cringe-worthy from the point of view of modern sensibilities. Only a couple years ago, when visiting my parents’ house, I finally took down the book Peter Pan from the shelf and decided to give it a read and found it a beautiful although slightly strange and offbeat story. In particular, I was shocked at how nasty and vengeful Tinker Bell was (particularly in trying to get Wendy killed), when I had remembered her as sweet and naive in the movie. It turns out I was wrong about the movie -- Tinker Bell tries to get Wendy killed there also! -- but somehow the tone is moderated well enough that in this version I never really feel horrified at her behavior, nor do I feel disturbed at the situation of the Lost Boys in the way the book made me view them. The song of the lone pirate who sings about how a pirate’s life is short, right before Captain Hook fires his gun and we hear a dropping sound followed by a splash, is one of the more masterful executions of dark humor that I’ve seen in Disney animation for children.

While most of the songs in Peter Pan, considered as songs on their own, are pretty good, I think the best one is the one whose lyrics didn’t make it into the film: “Never Smile at a Crocodile”.

Lady and the Tramp, 1955

Despite being more obscure than most of the old Disney animated classics, I used to know this one quite well since we had it in our home. I’ve always considered The Great Mouse Detective as the most underrated Disney film of all time, but I think it has serious competition here. Lady and the Tramp is an absolute gem. While not quite as Disney-fantasy-ish with its lack of magic and other fairy tale elements, in my opinion Lady and the Tramp is, in most ways, superior to everything else on this list save Mary Poppins. Beautiful animation which shows Lady and most of the other animals moving realistically in a way we haven’t seen since Bambi*. Everything visually and conceptually framed from the dogs’ points of view. Great voice acting. Consistently solid dialog without a single line too much or missing. A story evoking the dynamic between humans and pets, class inequality, and deep questions about the place of each of us in society and choices between a stable existence among loved ones and striking out to seize life by the horns. Our first female lead who stands on her own two four feet and whose sole goal isn’t to get kissed by her true love (one could argue that Alice was the earlier exception, but she is a little girl whereas Lady is actually a romantic female lead). When Lady is approached by her two best (male) friends in a very awkward (perhaps especially from a modern sensibility) but sweet scene where they offer to be her partner, Lady makes it clear that she doesn’t want or need a husband just for the sake of having a husband to make babies with -- her standing up for her own wants in this way doesn’t in the least turn into a Moral Stand that dominates the movie. Excellent music all the way through.

Oh, and this movie was my very first introduction, in early childhood, to the Italian language (”Bella Notte”), which some 25 years later sort became my second language of sorts.

Criticisms? Well, the baby was animated rather stiffly and unnaturally, but that was like half a minute of the movie at most. And there’s the whole segment with the Siamese cats, which produced a great song purely music-wise (fun fact: Peggy Lee provided the voices of the cats) but nowadays comes across as rather racist. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about it, but I will say that I’m sure in the minds of the creators this was no different than having animals of all other nationalities (Scottish, Russian, Mexican) appearing in the film with voices reflecting the respective accents.

*There may be a few exceptions, like Peggy, who seems to be modeled after the musician Peggy Lee and moves like a sexy human woman. The way that human sex appeal is conveyed through the animals’ movements in this movie is quite impressive: my mom confesses to having somewhat of a crush on Tramp growing up and not quite understanding how that could be possible when, well, he’s a dog.

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, 1954, and Old Yeller, 1957

I don’t want to say about these movies, as they don’t really fall under the category of animated classics. I just want to say that, while I saw each of them once growing up, on seeing them again I recognize each as a great movie in its own adult point of view way that is not necessarily very Disney-ish.

Sleeping Beauty, 1959

I think this was the movie I was watching at the time I decided it would be fun to write a bunch of mini-reviews for Tumblr, as my reactions were changing a lot as I was watching. I went into the movie very curious, because while I only remembered enough of the fairy tale story to know that it was another of the very simple ones, and I remembered the one song as a waltz by Tchaikovsky, and I knew I had seen the movie once (and probably only once) as a kid, I couldn’t remember anywhere near enough to possibly fill a full movie time. What was actually going to happen in this hour-and-a-quarter long film?

I wasn’t watching long before I came up with the description “spectacularly forgettable”, in part to justify why I’d managed to forget practically all of my one previous viewing. The story doesn’t have much substance and feels sillier than even the other fairy tale Disney plots, like even minor twinges of critical thought, even granting the magical rules of the universe, are liable to make the plot topple. There is some filler to flesh out the movie, but (unlike with Snow White’s dwarfs) none of it is as amusing as the creators seemed to think it was. The only characters with actual personality are rather boring -- the capers between the members of royalty and the jester are a bit on the annoying side in my opinion. Maleficent seems to have no motive whatsoever. She actually calls herself something like “the mistress of evil” later in the movie. This is pretty black-and-white even by Disney standards, where the bad guys usually at least want to think that they’re on the right side of things or justified in their aggressive behavior. Aurora (the title character) has the least personality of all the Disney princesses. Literally all I can say to describe her is that she has the Disney Princess Trifecta of characteristics: she has a good singing voice; she is friends with all the “nice” animals; and her only goal in life is to be reunited with her True Love who she met once for all of a few minutes. The reason why I couldn’t remember any songs other than the Tchaikovsky one is that there aren’t any.

The one thing I consciously really enjoyed while watching was the fact that the score throughout was Tchaikovsky; the idea of having one work of classical music as the entire score seems like a bold one for a Disney film. As I was digesting the movie afterwards (and watching the short documentaries supplied on Disney+ helped here!), I came to realize that this classical music backdrop was complimented in quite an interesting way by a fairly unique animation style. I had been disappointed by the animation early in my watching, disliking how a lot of the figures in the beginning castle scene (for instance, various people’s faces), looked very “flat” somehow. But I’ve come to see this as part of a style where everything looks almost like a series of cut-outs superimposed on each other, to incredibly beautiful effect in a lot of the outdoor scenes.

My conclusion? If you watch this the same way you watch most Disney animated movies -- focusing on plot, characterization, action, and meaning of the main story -- it will just be kind of forgettable at best. But if you watch it as more of a purely visual and musical piece of art without trying to make much “sense” out of it (so, more like I would watch a ballet), you may find it uniquely beautiful among Disney classics.

One Hundred and One Dalmations, 1961

Whew -- what a complete and utter contrast from its predecessor! I can hardly imagine a film that’s still distinctively Disney while being more different from Sleeping Beauty in every aspect.

I remember seeing One Hundred and One Dalmatians a handful of times in childhood (when I was around 5 and it had just come out on home video, my mom almost bought it for me but decided to go with Beauty and the Beast instead explaining that it had better music -- I grew up knowing the preview for Dalmatians that showed at the beginning of our Beauty and the Beast VHS than the dalmatians film itself). I remembered a number of scenes very distinctly, including a lot of the Horace and Jasper bickering and Cruella smashing one of their bottles of beer into the fire and knew Lucky’s line after getting stuck behind in the snow almost word for word, while I had entirely forgotten all of the country/farm characters and entire sequences involving them. I had forgotten, but soon remembered, the television scenes including the Kanine Krunchies jingle. (Some years later, I think as an older teenager, I read the original book with some interest.)

Although I wasn’t around in 1961, everything about this movie’s style strikes me as very contemporary -- the animation in particular seems like the current style for 60′s cartoons. Something about the dialog and humor feels that way as well, as though it closely represents a sort of 60′s young-people-in-London culture that I’ve never seen myself (I was struck for instance by Cruella being asked how she’s doing and cheerfully answering, “Miserable dahling as usual, perfectly wretched!”). It was a little strange and offputting to see television so prominently featured in Disney animation from so long ago, and to see such a decrepit bachelor pad (with the accompanying lifestyle and attitudes) as Horace and Jasper’s in a children’s movie. The crazy driving in snow at the end startled my adult sensibilities (as I now have some memorable experiences driving in snow) in a way that didn’t affect me as a child -- scenes like that just didn’t feel like Disney after having just watched all the previous films. All in all, these novel features made the whole movie a wild ride.

I’m bemused by the fact that, despite taking place in London (which I hadn’t remembered -- I thought it took place in America), the only accents which are fully British are those of the villains Cruella de Vil, Horace, and Jasper.

Main criticisms: I found all the stuff with Rolly being characterized by his body shape and only ever thinking about food to be in poor taste (although not surprising for the times). And while “Cruella de Vil” is a great jazz number, the movie has no other music to speak of -- my mom was quite right to choose Beauty and the Beast over it.

(I realized when finishing this review that this is the only one of all the movies in the list that I’d actually enjoy seeing again sometime soon. Not sure what to make of that. Something about it is more interesting than most of the others? Especially the human-centric parts?)

The Sword in the Stone, 1963

I never saw this movie until later childhood or maybe even early teenagerhood, when I quite liked it. On watching it again, I was overall pretty disappointed. This movie has some decent songs and some fun aspects to the story, but a lot of it is kind of weak and forgettable and it’s all just sloppily done.

The story has a clear moral message which is generally pro-education and about reaching one’s full potential, but in my eyes it comes out kind of muddled because the story shows Wart ending up as a legendary king only out of the arbitrary happenstance that that happens to be his divine destiny. Merlin’s motives seem kind of inconsistent as well, with him sometimes seeming to support Wart in his desire to become a squire, then flying off in a rage when Wart chooses squirehood over fulfilling a “greater” destiny, then joyfully returning after Wart pulls the sword from the stone and is now set on the fixed path to being king, even though this involved exactly zero change of attitude on Wart’s part. The message that actually comes across looks more like, “We have to just follow whatever fate has in store for us” than “We must strive to be the best we can be”. And, it arguably even comes across as subtly disrespectful to more mundane lifestyles and career paths.

The animation is not great by the high standard of full-length Disney features (I noted how I especially disliked how tears were shown). Wart’s voice seems to change a lot, sometimes broken and sometimes not yet broken. I found out after watching that this is because the character was played by three different actors, sometimes with more than one of those actors in the same scene! This was purportedly because the voice of the first actor cast for the role started to change, but then why does Wart sometimes sound like his voice has already changed anyway? Sloppiness all around.

Still, some parts of The Sword in the Stone are fun even if none of it is stellar, and it entertained me more when I was younger, so worth watching once, especially if you’re a kid, I guess?

Mary Poppins, 1964

I came into this one far more familiar with it than with most of the other Disney movies, including the ones I watched many times when I was young, so it feels a little strange to try to summarize a similar-length review of it. Mary Poppins is in my book without a doubt one of the top three Disney movies of all time, in some respects the very best, and certainly the masterpiece of Walt Disney himself, the culmination of literally decades of determination on his part to turn Pamela Travers’ children’s works into a movie. (I would feel sorrier for Travers about how strongly Disney twisted her arm to turn her books into a movie whose style was entirely antithetical to hers, if it weren’t for the fact that the Disney version of the story is just way better than her rather weak set of stories. I give Travers ample credit for having created an amazing character in the person of Mary Poppins, but for coming up with good stories, not so much.)

I didn’t see the full movie Mary Poppins until later childhood (although I knew many of the songs) and it quickly became a favorite of mine. I went a gap of a number of years without seeing it before I copied the soundtrack from someone when I was in college, which spurred me to go out and rent it (back when Blockbuster was a thing) and so I managed to reconnect with it at the age of 20. More recently I’ve become somewhat of a Mary Poppins enthusiast -- feeling pretty alone among my generation in this regard, with the possible exception of the theater subculture -- having seen probably most or all of the documentaries there are on its production and learned a ridiculous amount of trivia about it, not to mention knowing the whole soundtrack pretty much in my head.

Mary Poppins seems to be Disney’s longest children’s classic, at 2 hours and 19 minutes. All it lacks, really, is an animal-themed or classic fairy tale atmosphere and a proper villain. But what can you get out this movie? Stellar child acting (especially for that period) and excellent performances all around, apart from some awkward but endearing aspects of Dick Van Dyke’s acting (while his singing and physicality is superb). A complex and multi-layered story combining magic, comedy and a little tragedy, appreciable in equal measure from a child’s level and from an adult’s level. Revolutionary special effects which include the first extended hybrid live-action and animation sequence. Timeless words and phrases which have permanently entered the lexicon. One of my favorite extended musical sequence of all time in any movie (”Step In Time” takes up 8 minutes and change, and I’m glad they didn’t go with the “common sense” measure of cutting this “unnecessarily long” number). The Sherman brothers at their very best, in a musical soundtrack that easily scores in my top two out of all Disney movies (the other one being The Lion King). A beautiful message (among several big messages) about the little things being important (or at least, that’s a very crude summary), exquisitely encapsulated in the most beautiful song of the movie, “Feed the Birds” (this apparently became Walt Disney’s favorite song ever, and I’m pretty close to feeling the same way -- I’m determined that one day when I finally have a piano I’m going to learn to sing it along with the piano). I could go on and on here.

If I try really hard I can come up with the sole nitpick of feeling that maybe the parrot head on the umbrella’s handle shouldn’t only reveal itself as a talking parrot head in only one scene right at the very end -- this should have been shown at least once earlier. Even granting that, this film is still practically perfect in every way.

The Jungle Book, 1967

(Let’s get the Colonel Hath in the room out of the way first: “The Jungle Book” is a terrible title for a movie. You know, when you base a movie on a book you don’t have to give it the same title as the book...)

I saw The Jungle Book several times as a kid and, despite not considering it nearly as good as Mary Poppins, similarly reconnected with it in adulthood (particularly the soundtrack). Only several years ago I found myself thinking of getting hold of a double album of classic Disney songs that I thought I’d heard about but couldn’t seem to find online. It soon occurred to me that mostly what I really wanted was some of the songs of The Jungle Book, so I got that movie’s soundtrack instead. I soon learned for the first time that The Jungle Book’s songs were written by the Sherman Brothers*, precipitating an “Ah, that explains why I remember them as so good!” moment. (“I Wanna Be Like You” seems like the clear winner among the songs.) Of course hearing the soundtrack made me curious about the movie, which I did eventually get hold of several years ago; thus I had seen this film exactly once already since childhood.

It says a lot about the music and the overall technique behind this film that I still look back on it as one of the great classics, considering how weak the story is. In particular, I consider a story arc to be pretty flawed when characters that seem significant and/or memorable come in without really living up to their expected big role: the wolves who raised Mowgli play a crucial role in the beginning before more or less disappearing (and it doesn’t entirely make sense to me why Bagheera, rather than they, is guiding him to the man village), and King Louie (who is a well-formed character that I particularly enjoy watching) really ought to come back into the story later somehow (an alternate, and much more complex, ending had him make a reappearance). The villain Shere Khan is not especially well developed in terms of his character and motives, but I do enjoy his menacingly bass voice. Still, the voice acting, the action, the animation, and the overall setting are all very solid here.

I’ll end with some random observations about the song “That’s What Friends Are For”. I think the likeness of the vultures to the Beatles was mostly lost on me as a kid (along with the recognition that this movie came out in the Beatles’ heyday). More interestingly, even when I was old enough to understand how vultures eat, the fact that every single line of the song is a clever macabre double-entendre went completely over my head. I do think it was a very obvious mistake, by the Obvious Standards of Cinematography, to give Shere Khan the last line of the song and begin that line with the “camera” on him, rather than have his voice come in “off-camera” and Mowgli and the vultures looking thunderstruck before panning to him, but maybe I shouldn’t be pushing for overdone techniques here.

* An exception is “Bare Necessities”, which was written by Terry Gilkyson, the original songwriter Disney received submissions from, who wrote two hauntingly beautiful other numbers which were deemed not Disney-ish enough to be put in the film.

Some general stray observations:

These older Disney films love gags involving alcoholism and drunkenness, a bit of a questionable emphasis given that the audience is children. This trend continues into the 80′s at least, but I don’t think one sees it much in modern Disney movies.

Watching these animated films I often find myself flinching as characters’ heads smash into things or gigantic objects smash over their heads, feeling almost surprised when they come out of it pretty much fine. I guess this a staple element of cartoon action throughout the decades, but I can’t recall a more recent Disney animated film where we see this (guess I’ll soon find out!)

There is a certain style of vocal music, with unified rhythm and lyrics but complex harmony and a capella, which seems to have been immensely popular in the 40′s and 50′s and distinctively appears in practically every single one of the 40′s and 50′s films above (“You Can Fly” is a typical example). I recognize it also from some non-Disney-related old records my parents have that were passed down to them. I’m curious about whether this style has a name.

For years I thought the Sherman Brothers did only the soundtrack for Mary Poppins and Bedknobs and Broomsticks, only discovering they did The Jungle Book songs rather recently as I explained above. It turns out they were involved in most of the major Disney films around that period, including The Sword in the Stone and The Aristocats (although not its best-known number “Everybody Wants to Be a Cat”).

There is a particularly sad instrumental passage, played by the string section starting with a minor-key violin melody going downward and joined by lower string instruments, which I knew well from my Jungle Book soundtrack (partway through “Poor Bear”) but was surprised to hear in desperately sad moments of several of the other movies around that time (including One Hundred and One Dalmatians and Robin Hood, or at least a close variant of this passage with slightly different endings). I have no idea who wrote this or how it came to be reused so many times.

I knew the name Bruce Reitherman as the voice of Mowgli in The Jungle Book, but in watching all of these other features back to back I’ve noticed that there are some other Reithermans in the front credits of quite a few of them.

[kawaiijohn]

Danny calling Wes a Dave Strider knock off

"At least I have friends you stalker!"

"If they can't handle the truth, they can't call themselves my friends, Fenton." Wes spat back. "Besides it's not like I don't have friends- they just don't hang around me all the time like yours do."

"Yeah I'll believe it when I see it. What do they go to a different school? Live in Canada? Only exist online?" Danny mocked.

"Watch it, Fenton! I got my eyes and ears all over this town. I'm always watching, like I'm a cam in the Big Brother house, waiting for the next catfight between you and whatever ghosts show. Damn, it's a role reversal here! The big brother house is watching you, this ain't no daytime reality tv. I'm a real motherfuckin' level 99 paranormal investigator hot on your ass.

"Every time you turn around I'll be there, on the corner like a drug peddler. You look out your window and BOOM, there I am across the street. The bus comes by and I'm gone, baby- long gone. Gone like the wind-"

"Are you done?" Danny sighed. "I have somewhere to be in like an hour."

Wes grumbled, about to start up again, camera held tight. "I'll never be done with you, not until the world knows the truth. You turn your back and when you see me next I'll still be there... Doin' stuff!"

Danny rolled his eyes and scoffed. "Tuck was right, you really are a Dave Strider knock off- cheap, not as good, and even slightly off color."

Wes sputtered indignantly. Good! The prick was turning as red as his shirt. He should really give Tuck credit for helping him find shit to say that got a reaction lol this out of Wes. He was almost cute when he wasn't talking Danny's ears off.

Too bad he was infuriatingly irritating most days.

Oh well. He had places to be and milkshakes to drink!

Danny looked around them and transformed into phantom when he saw nobody was around. He smacked the camera out of Wes's hands before patting him on the back roughly. "Bye discount Dave, I have a meeting with my friends to get to."

He flew off and laughed the whole way to the Nasty Burger, reveling in the satisfying enraged screech that left Wes's throat.

The guy would probably look better with shades, he admitted to himself.

[bronzen-telescopes]

My Minecraft OC/Sona:

Name: Alma

Species: Witch/Drowned

Age: 15

Pronouns: She/Her

Inventory: Arrow (43), Gold Nugget (29), Shield, Flint (1), Feather (2), Book and Quill, Emerald (6), Ender Pearl (2), Carved Pumpkin (1), Bread (3), Cooked Cod (19), Oak Log (42), Honey Bottle (8), Crimson Fungus (1), Totem of Undying (1), Campfire (2), Fishing Rod

Hotbar: (first space is always empty for hand-only), Crossbow, Iron Pickaxe, Iron Axe, Iron Hoe, Soul Lantern, Flint and Steel, Shears, Sweet Berries (12)

Likes: Gliding with Elytra, Wearing Carved Pumpkins, Fishing Cod with her teeth, Building, Brewing potions, Sweet foods, Bees, Bats, Endermen, Drowned, Foxes, only one Phantom (her friend), Bats, baby Turtles, baby Slimes, Striders, any Golems, Camping, Sunsets, Poppies, Music and Ambience sounds, all Mushrooms

Dislikes: taste of Nether Wart, Nether Quartz, Prismarine (and related), taste of Chorus Fruit, Redstone (and related), Guardians and Elder Guardians, Hoglins, Pillagers (and related), Pufferfish, Beetroot, Raw meat, The Wither, darkness

Relationships: Emerald (Fox pet), Eyes (Phantom friend), the Witch Sisters (Witch friends), Boot (Strider pet), Buh'rnt (Piglin friend...?)

Favorite foods: Honey Bottle, Cooked Cod, Cake, Cookie, Sweet Berries, Bread, Spider Eye

Favorite blocks: Nether Gold Ore, Carved Pumpkin, Bookshelf, Blackstone, Soul Lantern, Crimson Fungus, Lectern, Campfire, Cauldron, Chain

Favorite items: Gold Ingot and Nugget, Flint, Feather, Ender Pearl, Book and Quill, Emerald

Favorite Potions: Invisibility, Fire Resistance

Weapons of choice: Crossbow, Fishing Rod, Trident

Armor: Iron Boots, Leather Pants (Golden Boots when in Nether)

Favorite biomes: Warped Forest, Swamp, Giant Tree Taiga, Warm Ocean

Favorite music discs: Cat, Far, Strad, Wait, Pigstep

Hobbies/Favorite activities: Brewing, Writing, Exploring the Nether dimension, Building, Swimming, Chill in Shipwrecks and Warm Oceans, messing around with Suspicious Stews

Other info:

Lives in a house in a Giant Tree Taiga biome, has a personal favorite Shipwreck where she hangs out, and a base in a Warped Forest

Once, she bred two foxes and both died leaving only the baby fox, so she took the fox as a pet and called her Emerald, because of the emerald she (the fox) is always holding

She became a Drowned when the Pillagers, after kidnapping her while she was exploring a Dark Forest biome, tested curses on her and turned her into a Drowned forever and now she's unable to change back, then they threw her in a small lake, but she doesn't remember

She was trying to find the ocean by land and when she reached a rather dry Swamp and almost burned because of the sun, two Witches decided to help her and gave her a hat, she spent some time with them and learned how to brew potions and cook. She still visits them to this day, she built them a slightly improved hut in return

She saved the life of a Phantom that crashed into her house and landed on the balcony, breaking his wing. She healed him with potions of harming and now he lives with her, making sure she doesn't get nightmares while she sleeps, and even gives her his old membranes he drops occasionally (for potions and fixing Elytra)

Buh'rnt was exiled from the Bastion he grew up for being an insufferable little bitch different from the other Piglins, so he decided to explore the Overworld not knowing that he'd die. Luckily for him, Alma somehow saved him with Soul magic and now he lives in her house, sleeps over a chest and eats her food. Beetroots are his favorite

[katreal-fic]

Day 5 — for #fictober 10/05/19

Prompt: “I might just kiss you.”

Fandom: Homestuck

Warnings: Cursing, 2nd Person POV

Part of a series. Please start from the beginning!

Characters: Dirk Strider & Roxy Lalonde 

First | Previous | Next

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Dirk > Get Over It

You don’t get over it. But, you’ve had years of the intrusions to learn to live with it. You pick yourself after time and the sea breeze allow the most persistent of the whispers to fade back into your brain. You don’t know how to stop it. You don’t think you can. Maybe it’s just in the universes’ cards that you’ll never be able to escape the insufferable and unignorable presence of your selves. Splintered, doomed, it’s a big old party full of the one person you hate the most. 

You’re on the computer this time, digging into some of the less physical aspects of your work for CrockerCorp. Coding wasn’t your favorite thing, but aside from Roxy and ARq, you were probably one of the better around, and as far as you know, neither of them were helping Jane out on a consulting basis. You ignore the humming in the back of your mind, the phantom disconnect bubbling out from some deep inner core that leaves you watching your hands performing their tasks and yet--not under your control at all. An observer. Weightless, formless, trapped in a world of numbers and words with only a single view to the world beyond.

Only that isn’t right, you could take the stairs to the roof and go wherever the fuck you wanted to. Maybe you’re trapped, but it’s your own damn choice.

That’s the most unnerving of the loose threads, you think, because you know exactly who is leaking through there and at least he has more of a right to inflict this shit on you than any of the others. 

It keeps leaking. Mixing. You wonder if one day you’ll stop noticing and cataloging and just accept it all as your lot in life. Maybe even use it.

You send off the finished product--even with clumsy as hell organic interfacing tools, you work more efficiently at this sort of task when your auto-responder rises to the surface--and scroll through your inbox for another one. 

One stands out from amongst the mixture of spam emails that somehow keep getting around your ever more sophisticated filter (you suspect ARquiusprite to be behind it, but have no proof) and the more mundane business communication you maintain with CrockerCorp’s research division. You used to go straight through Jane but...as the company expanded it became more efficient to just work directly with the developers since Jane wasn’t very plugged in to that particular aspect for the business. It unnerves you a little, thinking of the small bakery she opened to take back her family name from the Batterwitch, only for the business to balloon into such a multi-industry giant, filling many vital services in this world and only rivaled in scale by Jake’s revival of SkaiaNet. 

But you suppose that’s the responsibility of a god, taking the world in hand and guiding it. Benevolent patrons, looking down from on high, shaping the course of history and society into the best form it could be. Someone’s got to recreate the internet (the world’d better thank you and Roxy and ARquiusprite for that) and you weren’t willing to wait around for it to happen organically. Shit needed to get done, and sometimes, the eight of you were the ones who needed to do it. 

The rogue email stands out with it’s bright pink text and typo filled subject line. Why would Roxy send you an email? Why didn’t she just hit you up on Pesterchum or--

A thought and you have the window open in the corner of your display, fighting, and failing to resist the urge to press your palms into your face when you notice the little red dot next to Do Not Disturb. A little further digging and you turn up some unread notifications that never got sent due to the privacy settings.

Of fucking course. Of course you’d automatically flip it to DND when in one of your spirals and not even realize it. You remedy that mistake, but instead of scrolling back through Roxy’s messages--there’s also a meme sent your way from Dave, accompanied by an ironic selfie of him and Karkat from, Jesus Christ that was a month ago--you turn back to the email in your inbox. This would be the newest one, given the time stamp, which was only an hour ago.

There’s a picture attached, a night shot of New City, near where Roxy and Calliope set up. Roxy’s got the whole selfie thing going, smiling and radiant for the camera, pink eyes sparkling with mischief as she framed the background shot just perfectly.

There’s an orange and green streak across the cityscape, the tall buildings in the distant background, their lit windows shining like a million stars from across the bay. Calliope has her green-suited arms wrapped tightly around their neck, highlighted by feathered wings obviously hitting the end of their orange end of the gradient and starting down the green path. Despite the obvious speed (you can tell from the way Davepeta’s currently green coat is caught mid-whip behind them) the picture is perfectly clear and focused, as if you are looking through a window into an image frozen in time. 

Damn she’s good.

wishin’ u were here di-stri. i heard u got out a little. maybe u shuld do it again. liek maybe come out my way next tiem?? ;) we have fun.

You chew on the inside of your lip, studying the picture. The frozen mixture of delight and mild terror on Calliope’s face. The mischief on Roxy’s. You can’t see Davepeta’s even if you zoom in, what with the ever present glow beneath their skin and the glasses currently matching the same orange of their wings. You bet they are having a blast though. How did they manage to talk Calliope into that? You didn’t talk to the cherub much on your own, but you were under the impression she was a skittish thing.

Your hand moves on its own, triggering the sylladex withdrawal on reflex. The feather hums quietly in your hand. It’s fading. The colors duller. Moving slower. But it’s there and it’s a comfort and…

Maybe you should.

You open Pesterchum back up.

TT begins pestering TG

TT: Sorry Ro-Lal, I was buried in work. TT: If you’re free I could probably head out your way tomorrow. I’m at a lull in my projects.

You aren’t, really, but as you’ve been so clearly reminded by the peanut gallery, none of this shit actually matters. And…

You miss Roxy. If you turn down this invitation…

Well, they already stopped coming once, and you let them. 

You don’t expect an answer immediately; the carapacian kingdom was a few timezones ahead of your ocean bound kingdom. It’s well into dinner time and you bet she’s a little busy with her guests and being the most kickass hostess of all time. 

You barely pull up another project and start studying the design specifications before the window on your shades spring open, searing excited bright pink across your eyeballs.

TG: omg dirk really??? this is going to be awesome!!! Callie and i promised to take ARq and peta out for more shenanignss but oh my gawd thisll be soo much fun! Itll be liek old times! Ull have to keep me updatedf on ur ETA TG: gawd i havent seen you in so long i might just kiss u TG: plonk a big one rite smack dab on each cheek TT: Don’t make me reconsider now, Rox. TT: You know how I feel about smooches, advanced warning or not these cheeks are off limits without applying for a permit. It’s private real estate. TG: nu’uh buster no take backsies!!! U accepted the invitation u gotta put up with the potential of that ill be so overcome with joy at seeing ur face that there’ll be a shower of friendly smooches TG: see u tomorrow <3 TT: Tomorrow, it is Roxy.

You talk a bit more, but Roxy soon excuses herself to do the hosting thing, and you’re left wondering what you’d gotten yourself into.

You’d forgotten Davepeta was traveling with ARquius.

Trapped. Trapped and it’s your own damn fault.

There’s no way you’ll let Roxy down after all that though.

You’ll just have to deal with it when you get there.

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