#hes never getting a date with anyone

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 329

Bruce was admittedly suspicious when Talia requests a meeting, and is admittedly still upset with the entire hiding Damian’s existence from him for literal years. But he also admits that he just… has to take a moment. 

“Run that by me again please?” He had to have misheard, right? Or gotten drugged by something maybe. 

Talia sighs, sounding just as tired as he felt. “Father’s tea supplier has moved to Gotham after an argument, and he wishes to discuss the agreement of him not entering the city- to speak with said vendor.” 

[deadboyswalking]

Imagine it's like, 10 years later and not only does Sanji realize that Zoro is kind of his best friend, but he also spends all of his time with him??? And he kind of loves him??? And in all of their time together, Sanji has rarely sought out other companionship (rarer over time) and Zoro has never seemed interested in it???

"OH MY GOD!"

"It's not a big deal, cook."

"I HAVEN'T SPENT A SINGLE DAY WITHOUT YOU IN SEVEN YEARS."

"And you've gotten on my nerves every single one of those 2,556 days."

"WE SHARE A BED!"

"I'm almost always on night watch and you're up before anyone else. Waste of space to each have our own."

"BUT WE SLEEP IN IT TOGETHER HALF THE TIME!"

"At least you don't kick in your sleep. And you always bitch about being cold when you're alone, so I'm not seeing the problem here."

"OH MY GOD, ARE WE DATING? WHAT IS THIS? WHAT ARE WE???"

[fridgrave2-0]

hehe ghost-turbo haunting felix au

turbo is connected to the last piece of his code in the whole arcade - a trophy he gifted to felix in mid 80s as a symbol of him genuinely caring about their relationships on par with being the best racer. felix also gave him one of his medals and both kept their gifts next to other rewards, but when roadblasters and turbotime were unplugged, the medal was gone with everything else

now, after burning in cola-lava turbo is basically dead, but scraps of his code still were intertwined with the trophy (after all, it was his first winner's cup, but felix never knew about it), giving turbo an opportunity to exist as a shadow incapable of interacting with anything and anyone besides felix, who kept the trophy even after the roadblasters incident

also I went crazy in tags, feel free to check them out

[gayofthefae]

Will Byers is flirty and he's a smug son of a bitch about it too. Don't let anyone tell you different. Because what the fuck is this.

Look at his smug little smile. He knows what he did.

[saetiate]

pov you're on sae's line messages with me

p.s. i might srb this but please don't reblog!! i am open to replies but i'm feeling a little shy about this ahaha <3 thank you for your kind understanding!

[karmicpunishment]

playboy!ace stuff or like super flirty ace content is always so funny to me because I literally cannot imagine him like that with someone he isn't at least semi-close to or needs something from. like I cannot picture him trying to hit on strangers or smth for the life of me like it just does not seem in character to me lol I get the idea of him fumbling BAD is funny though like he just does not seem like he. cares about that??? like I can't see him hitting on random girls or going out of his way to find a relationship, both canonically or my own headcanon-y space.

but seriously, no hate to anyone who does subscribe to this subgenre of hc, I respect you 100%, we're just like two ships passing in the night <3 also ace fumbling memes are very funny never stop making them please

[grossdyke]

we as a society really need to get into the torrid awful years long harry/hermione affair that started with them stumbling into bed together during the horcrux hunt when ron left. btw

[kagooleo]

first dates aren't always perfect 💐🌺🌸

[synonymroll648]

after fitz cools off a little bit about sophie and keefe being a thing, he should drop tidbits about keefe (mostly during trust exercises) that he thinks she might find helpful since they're dating.

the thing is, instead of just stuff like, 'keefe loves frogs, so he might appreciate a gift or trip related to them, idk' he also drops things like 'btw if you just hold his hand in your hands - specifically towards the back of his head, just behind his ears - while you're talking to him, he'll probably melt haha. also his scalp is sensitive, do with that what you will, but make sure you're gentle'.

bonus points if sophie asks keefe about why every single tidbit fitz gives is correct and he goes tomato red for the first time ever and sputters out something like 'i gave fitz the lord of the snuggles title based on personal experience - he's clingy when he's tired, ok?'

[sonknuxadow]

the two characters i feel most strongly about in terms of "they would NOT have kids when theyre older" are sonic and rouge but not really in the same way . like with sonic i really dont think he'd have kids but im able to give a bit more leeway with him because with sonic the part that i dont agree with is him actively wanting kids and/or a partner and settling down and being all domestic about it if he does end up with either of those things. so there are probably some highly specific potential scenarios of adult sonic being a dad that id be fine with even if it's still not something i can really see happening

with rouge on the other hand its because there is not a single motherly bone in that girls body she's literally stated onscreen in a game that she never wants to be a mom. every time someone portrays her as a mom or motherly figure it's physically hurting her . SAD !

[oceanwithouthermoon]

i posted abt this on my tiktok story but i need to rant more so im putting it here 😭😭 the way a lot of mikosai shippers (on tiktok, pinterest, reddit, etc) are is such a big reminder to me of why i hate the strictly romantic soulmates trope with every fiber of my being 😭😭😭 people who interpret soulmates as "that means theyre canonically together" regardless of how the characters actually feel about each other and if they ACTUALLY get together is so fucking gross to me oh my god its so fucking gross i hate forced romance so bad 😭😭 someone cant just say "hey, we're soulmates so you HAVE to date me and its literally weird and impossible for you to like anyone else because i said so!!" and also aiura WOULDNT do that anyway ???? HELLOOO???

you have no idea how many people ive seen call all saiki ships with anyone other than aiura "problematic ships" just because "theyre soulmates"

[javierduffy]

just a few javieran horse headcanons because i like them a normal amount

branwen

- tall AND fat. kieran makes sure he’s always fed (maybe even accidentally a teensy bit overfed. just because kieran can’t help but indulge him when he butts him with his head or nuzzles at his pockets when he knows there’s treats in there. but never too much because ‘obesity is a problem, even in animals !’). probably about 17hh, taller than average for a kentucky saddler but nothing too big. especially since kieran himself is quite tall

- VERY well-tempered, both naturally, as well as because kieran has literally made him bulletproof. bagged him, blanketed him, stood, jumped, backflipped onto and off of him. this kindly gentleman of a horse only spooks when he wants to be bratty specifically.

- i think he’s about 6 or so, came from the stables kieran worked at after being orphaned, he was just a colt when kieran was just a kid. kieran learned how to birth foals quickly, and branwen happened to be one of them. with the way that they fell in love with each other and the way that branwen whinnied and pranced up to the fence when kieran came back to buy him after the army didn’t work out, you’d think that horse was born just for him.

- his favourite treats, in order, are rutabaga (kieran’s secret for branwen’s glossy coat. also why he’s kinda fat.), boiled potatoes mixed into his oats, apples, and fresh greens. he’s simultaneously incredibly easy to please because of the simplicity of the latter parts of his favourites list and also very needy and complicated because kieran so loves to make his pony happy with his absolute favourite treats, so he tries his very best to get branwen’s eccentric tastes pleased once falling into the VDL’s.

- i always say “a horse’s favourite thing to do is hurt itself”, and i think this statement holds relatively true for branwen as well, though there’s a 25% chance that he’s actually hurt, a 50% chance that he’s only mildly injured or spooked and he’s playing it up to get kieran to dote on him, and a 25% chance that he will protect kieran with his life when they’re in a dire situation (see: snake on the ground or gunfire nearby. or even god forbid a spare tumbleweed find it’s way rolling nearby.) despite kieran’s last wish being his horse getting injured. branwen thinks that he’s gotta be The Man and protect his dad sometimes. it does not help in any situation ever whatsoever.

- branwen is the PERFECT companion for a trail riding date. he’s settled, calm, has a great gait, and as a gelding, truly is not worried about other horses being “faster” than him, so he never gets rowdy nor has any problems when partner riders/horses crowd him. kieran is allowed to ask for as many kisses as he pleases because branwen will never jump when javier’s gold-tipped boots poke him in the side and boaz irritatedly flicks his flank with his tail. truly a goated wingman. also never complains about long rides, and enjoys being out of camp with his rider for as much as physically possible for both of them, so he’s never barnsour in either direction.

boaz

- as an american paint, he’s naturally short and stocky. saddle ends up being a bit loose, though, as javier isn’t as dedicated to keeping him perfectly fed or groomed. he loves him, sure, but horses are somewhat of tools to him, so he kinda does slightly more than bare minimum to keep him kempt and healthy. around 14.5hh, slightly shorter than average and quite dense with muscle

- temperamentally a bit volatile. this horse has just as much drama as his rider, if not a little more. doesn’t like something ? ridden too long ? that stick looks too much like a snake ? hasn’t spent enough time with kieran that day ? he will snort and grunt and bunny hop if javi isn’t on him, and shudder hard enough the saddle shakes underneath him if he is. boaz likes to please his rider, but he also demands pleasure himself, and has no issue with “accidentally” placing a hoof on his owners nice, intentionally clean boots, and subsequently slowly leaning more and more of his weight onto it when he doesn’t immediately get what he wants. bratty pony. generally, he keeps javier safe, though, when it comes down to it.

- around 5 years old. after dutch found javier trying to steal chickens the first time they met, he soon took him back to that ranch and their first take as gang leader and member was a 1 year old grey paint colt for javi to train and subsequently ride. until he was rideable, javier rode a morgan that was formerly hosea’s, named carolina, while he lead boaz everywhere behind him.

- favourite treats, in order, are corn cobs (especially dried), prickly pear fruit AND cactus, sugar cubes, and sliced apples. will force javier to share his maiz with him. javier has always sliced his apples up since he was a colt, not only because javi simply finds comfort in toying with his knife, but also because boaz will not eat them otherwise. javi will also cut all of the spines off of the cactus before letting boaz eat them.

- in terms of injury, boaz is the most dramatic tank on the planet. this horse could arthur morgan-style run face first into a tree and then fall off a cliff and walk it off. but not before he gimps and limps and whines and teeth grinds his way into javier leading him instead of riding him for the next mile or two. once kieran started taking care of him, there is also a 25% chance of boaz faking a terribly painful injury just to get kieran to dote on him.

- kinda the worst wingman ever LMFAO easily annoyed, easily aroused, easily offended, and as a stallion, HAS to walk in front of the “herd” (his rider’s boyfriend and his horse). pins his ears back, smashes into personal space, flicks branwen with his tail (and preferably kieran, if he can reach him) even sometimes will nip at branwen if the latter tries to calmly make this date a date and not a life or death race (whoever loses, their dad is gay) and walk side-by-side to aid their riders’ hand holdings. will make executive decisions via stopping or veering off for fresh green grass beside the trail, will at points actively attempt to shudder javier out of his saddle (has succeeded once when javi was distracted by a story being excitedly told by kieran), and will also spook and take off running so fast javier thinks it must have broken his neck from the velocity. generally makes trail rides a living hell, but kieran finds it charming, and it makes for some cute shoujo-style “omg … *reaches out to help you up after your horse bucks you off because he saw a log that looked nothing at all and everything like a cougar and pink and white soft bubbles surround me* are you okay ? here, let me help.” moments. maybe some day boaz will be allowed off of the national american terrorist list written by javier “rizzless rider” escuella

ok im tired and that’s all i can think of please enjoy and feel free to contribute 👍 i love them so bad im gona cry

[all-pacas]

This is not a CamChase post, but, I actually do want to talk about something I feel is deeply underappreciated by fandom, which is: Cameron and Chase are actually friends.

Long before they ever sleep together, all the way back in early S1. The two of them are almost always shown to get along! Cameron sticks up for Chase the entire Vogler arc, refusing (incorrectly) to believe he would rat, or that he should be fired. Chase, noted apathetic, actually tends to go out of his way to compliment or stick up for Cameron in early episodes: he passes along her good ideas to House (Maternity), defends her from House's criticism (Detox), and compliments her good ideas in Pilot and DNR, something he notable never does once for Foreman.

They get along! They have a joking conversation about lab results and House and Foreman's fight in Socratic Method. In Paternity Chase makes a sort of borderline inappropriate joke that the patient should take his mind off his pain by admiring Cameron's boobs; Cameron laughs instead of getting offended. In Sports Medicine, he teases her about her upcoming date with House. In Hunting, before the meth hookup, Chase is openly worried about her and asks Cameron to drinks; he even offers to do extra work so she can take it easy! Chase! The laziest man alive!

But to me, the most telling example is in in Mob Rules. We're at the start of the Hameron arc, and last episode Cameron asked House if he liked her, which he didn't answer either way. And what does Cameron do? She talks to Chase about it.

CAMERON: Did House seem weird to you? CHASE: Are you expecting him to be weird? CAMERON: We spoke about how we felt. CHASE: You told him you liked him? CAMERON: No, of course not. CHASE: What are you talking about, then? CAMERON: I asked him if he liked me. CHASE: Why would you do that? CAMERON: Because… I like him.

They're friends! Chase reacts with zero surprise that Cameron likes House; she goes to him for advice in a moment she's feeling vulnerable. He already knows she likes House, Cameron wants his opinion. This is a conversation between friends.

In fact, this happens a few times. Notably, Cameron tries very hard to get Chase to open up to her in Cursed:

CAMERON: You know, parents are never as bad as kids think they are. CHASE: You like my dad so much, ask him out. CAMERON: [joking] I’d make an excellent step-mom, I’m very lenient. [pause] He’s your father, you never see him, and he’s here. Unless he’s done some unspeakable thing, you should lighten up. CHASE: Right, thanks for the tip.

And, yeah, she clearly doesn't get it, but she's trying! She's joking around, she cares. Cameron tries to get Chase's advice in Sleeping Dogs Lie, she commiserates with him in Deception, she unilaterally defends Chase in The Mistake. They joke around sometimes, she confides in Chase when the TB guy in TB or Not TB asks her out: Cameron goes to Chase for relationship advice! More than once!

These are conversations that do not happen with other characters: Cameron and Foreman indicate they respect one another medically, but never have personal conversations; Chase doesn't open up to anyone, period. But whenever Cameron is looking for advice or to share romantic gossip… she goes to Chase. And Chase, for his part, likes to tease her (and she him: sex can kill you was 1000% Cameron trolling him), but honestly tends to be… if not automatically sympathetic, he listens, he jokes about TB Guy, he knows about her crush on House and treats it like old news. They're! Friends! I would actually argue this is probably the main reason Cameron goes to him when she decides she wants casual sex: Chase is someone she, in fact, likes. Even if that liking is not romantic. (Even the btw we should have sex, I will never love you is uh. Unless you are totally deranged that is not how you approach a fwb situation. Unless you. You know. Know Chase isn't gonna be offended because he already knows you're friends and aren't trying to drag him.)

And this actually does continue once they do date, btw. They're constantly hanging out. Chase spends entire episodes of S5 just hanging out in the ER. He still likes to tease her (Whatever it Takes), she inexplicably/hilariously still ropes him into her House drama (Ugly), but I can count on one hand the number of times they bicker or are unkind and mean it. They are friends! They always were friends. And that was the case long before they ever hooked up. In an AU where they never dated, they would still be friends. Their (romantic) relationship was badly written, no one likes it, I get it. But honestly I really do love how well they got along in S1-2, and I wish people appreciated that friendship more.

[swhhdr-wthhr]

new dynamic i'm having a lot of fun with in my new fanfic im writing: virgil and patton who have just started dating flirting with each other all the time in the most corny "two middle schoolers who just got into their first relationship" way, and logan and roman being so fed up with it

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

Loving your updates with how things are going with stoner Romeo 💘

Thank yoooou! And there will be plenty more to come, I'm sure- unless he suddenly decides he's not interested any more or I fuck up in some majorly horrifying way. But I'm trying to stay optimistic! And that's comparatively easy because besides being a sexual delight, he's also very sweet and (very importantly) good at communication!

[whiskey-tango-matcha]

not to brag, but my therapist told me today that i did incredible during our emdr session, which means i get an A for the day in therapy, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve 🙂‍↕️😌