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withering-daylight · 17 days ago

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INNOCENT TEASING | HICCUP HADDOCK x FEM!READER

Summery: one thing about dating the Chief of Berk was that he was always busy, and no matter how much you two wanted to have your intimate moments, they always got interrupted by people who needed Hiccup’s help on something. So, during a meeting, you decide to tease Hiccup under the table.

Timeline: 2-3 movie

Warnings: smut, explicit content, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, fingering

Word count: 2k

I haven’t written any smut in a while so I’m hoping this is up to everyone’s standards 🙏 if there are any typos I’ve missed I’m sorry for that as well.

You adored your boyfriend, Hiccup Haddock III, the Chief of Berk. Loved him to no bounds even! But… when you’re dating a chief, they are going to be busy—very busy.

Yet, Hiccup always found a way to turn you on. Whether it was how he listened to others during meetings, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration, thinking about how to solve whatever problem was brought to him. Or, if it was something as simple as putting an arm around your waist and pulling you close to him, leaning close to your neck and pressing a kiss or two on it.

The same went vice versa when it came to you. You had a good figure, and anything you did—like throwing a spear at a training dummy—just made him want to throw you over his shoulder and take you straight to bed to devour you completely.

Those intimate moments don’t happen often now, not when the people of Berk constantly need his help. Even if it’s the middle of the night and Hiccup has you bent over a desk, his throbbing cock thrusting in and out of your soaking cunt with desire and (rather desperate) need, somehow a random Viking will be knocking on the front door of the chief’s hut, needing Hiccup’s help for something stupid!

Okay, maybe it wasn’t all stupid—but usually it was for something stupid. Of course, Hiccup can’t just ignore a citizen of his tribe, so he reluctantly pulled away from you, kissing your forehead.

“I’ll be back, love.” He’d whisper to you, using his thumbs to wipe tears of pleasure from your cheeks. He’d fix himself up, put on some clothes, and go to the door to talk to the citizen. All the while making sure he looked like he just woke up, even when you and he knew that couldn’t be even slightly near the truth!

Then, by the time Hiccup would come back inside, you’d be asleep under the warm fur blankets that adorned the bed you two shared. Certainly too tired to clean yourself up, you were simply wrapped in the familiar comfort of peace inside your home. He would smile, joining you under the blankets and holding you close.

Those nightly interruptions from Vikings didn’t happen just one time. It was a regular occurrence, happening almost every night. You couldn’t even kiss Hiccup without someone in distress needing him.

Hiccup was the chief of Berk, so it was expected he’d be busy. All you wanted was just to be able to have your alone time with him, and he wanted the same.

One thing was for certain: you never stopped teasing him. Especially during meetings.

Like this current meeting in the Great Hall about trading and imports. You were sitting next to Hiccup with your head propped up on your left hand. You weren’t listening to what was being said, instead indirectly staring at Hiccup the entire time. He didn’t notice, heavily involved in the conversation at hand. With that same concentrated look on his face that always made you want him more than you already did.

You began to bite the inside of your lip, thinking of all the things you wanted to indulge in with him, that is, if it weren’t for the constant meetings. Your gaze shifted to the other people sitting around the large table, mainly high-up merchants from other tribes seeking a trade compromise. Perhaps wanting to sell their imports for higher. Seeing as they weren’t paying attention to you, you took this as your chance.

Slowly, you moved your right hand under the table, placing it on the inside of Hiccup’s left thigh. You squeezed his thigh with your hand, not hard, but definitely not gently. You were still looking at him, trying to see if his expression would change. All you got, though, was him glancing at you with a confused raise of an eyebrow.

You smiled innocently, but even with that innocent smile you portrayed, you both knew that your intentions were far from innocent. As your hand was inching closer to his crotch.

You really had no shame, but where was the shame if no one was paying attention anyway? All the merchants were focused on trying to convince Hiccup to let them import the goods the merchants had to offer; anything outside their purpose didn’t matter, nor did they seemingly care enough to notice what was happening under the wooden table.

Hiccup felt your hand drift closer up, a faint pink hue of a flush welcoming itself onto his cheeks. He gave you a warning look, but all you did was move your hand to the waistband of his pants, all the while that same innocent smile was gracing your lips. Though, that smile became mocking as the seconds continued.

Just before you could slide your hand under Hiccup’s waistband, he grabbed your hand and moved it back on his thigh. He looked at the merchants and cleared his throat, effectively putting a stop to their conversation.

“Look, we’re running out of time, and I have some more matters to attend to. We’ll continue this discussion tomorrow.” He said firmly, standing up and guiding you to stand up as well. Before the merchants could attempt to get words out, Hiccup had already begun leading you out of the Great Hall and back to the hut you two resided in.

Your teasing definitely worked, judging by the bulge in his pants.

The moment he shut the door to you guys’ hut, he locked the door and turned around fully to face you.

“You could’ve waited till after the meeting to tease me.” Hiccup said with a glare, though the glare seemed more on the playful side.

“Couldn’t help it.” You replied simply with a shrug. Then, taking long strides towards Hiccup, stopping in front of him. “How would I know I’d even have time to even talk to you after the meeting? I just happened to take my chances, and look where they got me. Clever thinking on my part.” You finished with a laugh, clearly amused about the whole situation.

Hiccup didn’t even reply, instead sneaking an arm around your waist and pulling you close so your bodies were pressed against each other. His right hand crept up and found its place on your left cheek. Without a moment to waste, he leaned in and pressed his lips against yours in a passionate kiss.

His lips against yours were heavenly. While they were slightly chapped, they were warm and utterly perfect. You could feel the soft tickle of his breath beneath your nose, how his tongue slid against your bottom lip in a request for more. You agreed and let your own lips part slightly, allowing his tongue to slip inside.

The arm that was around your waist slid lower to your ass, grazing the curve of your butt before squeezing just enough for a gasp to unfurl from you, a soft moan following quickly after.

You could feel your cheeks heat up as this continued for a few more seconds before he pulled away with only a thin string of saliva connecting your lips. Your chest was heaving, and you swore you could hear both of your heartbeats combined.

“Bed?” Hiccup asked, staring down at you with a knowing grin tugging on his lips. His eyes held so much love for you. Not the type that could be described in love ballads, but the type of love that was real—genuine.

“Bed.” You responded with a grin of your own. You felt truly alive, just able to be with him and have a proper moment after who knows how long.

Hiccup nodded. “Now come on, I need to take those clothes off you.” He insisted, squeezing your ass once more. You jumped a bit, swatting his hand away.

“I’m going, I’m going. See?” You said, gesturing to how you were now walking at a brisk pace to reach the bedroom.

“I see.” He answered, walking next to you and shutting the bedroom door behind him. You sat on the edge of the bed, taking off your shoes and socks before lying down against the comfortable mattress. Hiccup put his hands on either side of your shoulders, leaning in once more for another kiss.

Except during this kiss, he’s slowly undressing you, throwing your clothes and having them land onto the floor, exposing your bare skin to the cool air. His lips detach from your lips, now going to your neck and nipping the skin right under your jaw, each nip being soothed with a few flicks of his tongue. You open your mouth to let short moans slip out, your fingers in the meantime fiddling with his clothing and taking them off his body, discarding them quickly to the floor next to your own clothes.

With your hands now resting on Hiccup’s shoulders, you felt his kisses go lower and make noticeable hickeys on your collarbone and shoulders, but at least your clothing will definitely hide those afterwards.

Your sweet moans were captivating and just so beautiful to him, enticing him to continue with his actions and go further.

“Can I finger you, dear?” Hiccup asked while his voice was muffled against your skin, as his lips were right against your collarbone. He was peering up at your flushed face through his lashes, waiting patiently for your answer. He didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, not when he was finally able to give you the pleasure you deserved.

“Please…” You whispered, blinking slowly and moving one of your hands off his shoulder and up to his thick, mahogany-colored hair. Your fingers began to card through his hair, your eyes now staying open as you admired every freckle, eyelash, hair, and scar on his face.

“Okay, tell me if it becomes too much.” He whispered reassuringly, letting his left hand map every curve of your body while he lowered it to your clit and gently inserted a finger into your vagina. He slowly pumped in and out, letting your heat get used to the feeling before, after a few minutes, adding a second finger. Hiccup curled both fingers inside your walls, hitting your g-spot perfectly.

You gasped and threw your head back, moaning increasingly louder as he continued to stimulate that same spot for a few more seconds before uncurling his fingers and pulling them out.

“Hiccup…!” You whined with a disappointed moan, panting heavily while moving your head back to look at him. Hiccup laughed softly, raising his head to kiss your cheek.

“Don’t whine; I’ll make sure your needs are taken care of.” He reassured, lining up his hard cock to your stretched opening, penetrating you fully while your body adjusted to accommodate him.

His hands find their way to your hips and hold you in place. He moves inside you, slow and steady, before, after a few minutes, starting to speed up his pace and hitting your core with each thrust.

Your hands clutch his shoulders tighter, nails digging into the skin, while each thrust equally makes you both get closer to the edge. Hiccup’s head lowered to your ear, his hot breath fanning against the shell of your ear. A shiver went down your spine, letting a soft whimper leave your lips.

“Have I told you how beautiful you are? How perfect you are?” He asked lovingly, his movements getting stronger and quicker. You nodded, opening your eyes slowly.

“A couple of times.” You finally manage to say, shaking as you reach orgasm, letting the feeling wash over you entirely. Hiccup reached his own orgasm a few seconds later, collapsing beside you on the bed and wrapping his arms around you before resting his head on your shoulder. You were calming your breathing, leaning your head against Hiccup’s, and closing your eyes.

“Can we do that more often?” You asked, hugging him closer and grabbing a blanket to put over you both. Hiccup laughs, kissing your shoulder.

“We can try to.” He said with a nod, grabbing another blanket so both you and he can be warm and comfortable. He closed his own eyes, holding you securely against him.

#𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒇𝒊𝒄𝒔𝜗𝜚 #hiccup haddock x reader #hiccup haddock smut #this was a request but I accidentally deleted the ask #httyd #writers on tumblr #request #requests open

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foone · 1 year ago

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AAA games? Pfft. Indie games? Double pfft.

I only play games from the alternate history where Hillary Clinton was elected in 2008 and banned all video games. You can only imagine how weird their underground gaming scene is. People like to call unlicensed games "bootlegs" but they've got actual bootlegged games! I've played games about helping your grandmother in hospice care realize she's a lesbian by reading Sappho to her, at 2am in a speakeasy in Baltimore. The cops raided it the next night, hundreds of Gamers were arrested. They posted pictures all over Friendster of the Baltimore PD destroying the arcades with axes.

I nearly got busted once because I was imaging old disks from a 386 and someone tipped off the gaming cops that there was a copy of Commander Keen in there. I had to prove that I didn't know it, I was imaging the disks blind and then indexing them later, and I would of course turn over any contraband to the proper authorities.

I was already on a watch list because I'd been known to have some gamedev-related activities pre-ban. They can't arrest me for making games back in 2007 when it was still legal, but they do want to keep an eye on me since I have the skills to break the law.

Anyway that universe's bootlegs are mainly PC games. Can't really have console games if there hasn't been a console release since the Wii/PS3/360 era. At one point Nintendo threatened to release the Wii SDK so game devs in the US could make unlicensed games, but that didn't happen as there were quickly no functional Wiis left in the US, except for very rare holdouts that never move. PC games are easy to distribute samizdat and hide on a USB stick or CD-R labeled "nickelback".

Japan's games industry is still going, so the later Nintendo and Sony consoles still exist, but Microsoft got out of the business of course. They sold the franchise to Sega who were hoping to release the 360 successor (the Xbox One in our universe) as the Sega Phoenix but it never materialized, either through their own financial incompetence or because of pressure from the US. There's a lot of international treaties that the US has pushed "and this aid only goes through if you ban games" clauses into. That would have been an official UN resolution if the USSR hadn't vetoed it. For once, thank God for the security council, eh?

I mainly get my gaming news through Japanese gaming sites (through a set of VPNs, since they're blocked at the border firewall), and some tor onion site run by a weird guy in Minnesota who is obsessed with documenting all the underground US games.

There's a lot being worked on, but it's always a tricky trade off. Too much attention and the police might be able to track down the creators, and it's basically impossible to fund underground games, as the VISA/PayPal etc funds get seized immediately. There's a whole task force for that.

Anyway one of the weirdest differences between our two time lines is that they've gone back and edited out gaming from a bunch of movies. Those that they can, of course. War games was just banned because they couldn't remove the tic tac toe ending. The Net just removed the scene at the beginning where she's playing Wolfenstein 3D, by recording some new screen footage and a new voice over. She's fixing a spreadsheet in the new edition.

(Yes, I've seen The Net from this alternate timeline. On Laserdisc, of course. I'm just that kind of person!)

They even edited Star Wars. You know that scene where R2-D2 is playing holochess with Chewie? They edited it to be a board game instead of holograms, because that made it too "video gamey".

Technically it's not illegal to show gaming in a movie, but it needs to be an 18+ film and you have to show the deleterious effects of gaming and/or the gamesters coming to a bad end.

This has affected films less than you'd think, to be honest. They were never great about showing video games even before they banned them.

Anyway, go have fun playing your AAA games with hundred-million-dollar budgets. I only play indie games made by people under a constant threat of arrest for their art.

#Video games #Unreality

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marvelwitchergilmore · 2 months ago

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A Cup of Coffee

Summary: Bucky Barnes x fe!Reader -> You and Bucky make a promise to share a cup of coffee when he gets back from war. But sometimes a promise has to be broken.

Disclaimer: Fluff, hurt/comfort vibes, little angst. Asgardian!reader. 40s!Bucky/Winter Soldier. Kinda ignores the full MCU timeline but follows it enough to make sense...I hope. Mentions of death and violence (but not too much). Not Proof Read.

“Just a cup of coffee, please.” A voice spoke beside you before stradling the stool, two seats down from you. “Thank you.”

You’d been seeing them all day. Young men fighting for an old man’s cause across the water. A lot of them wouldn’t return. You knew that. You also knew the ones that would, would definitely have a few stories to tell. Most would probably take them to the grave.

You’d seen plenty of men die in war. Some were stories. Most were beside you.

“When do you leave?”

“Sorry?” The man turned and looked at you eventually. You hadn’t looked at him when you spoke. Your eyes remained fixed on the cup of coffee in front of you.

You looked at him, eventually. A soft look in your eyes. “I asked, when do you leave?”

“Oh,” he seemed a little embarrassed. He should have known what you’d asked him. “A few hours. Got my orders this morning.”

As the waitress came back with his coffee, he went to pay. But you beat him to it. It’s the least you could do for him.

“No, I’ve got it.”

He seemed a little surprised but thankful all the same. “I feel like I need to pay you back somehow.”

You shook your head with a light smile. “No need.”

He nodded, looking at his coffee cup before looking back at you. “I’m Bucky, by the way.”

You smiled, “Y/n.”

“That’s a beautiful name.”

You smiled. “Thank you.”

He motioned to the seat beside you. “Mind if I sit with you?”

“No. But I would have figured you’d be waiting on someone special.”

He chuckled a little, but shook his head. “No. Not tonight.”

Bucky moved to sit beside you and you turned your stool to face him a little better. It was up close you realised his eyes were blue. The corner of his mouth raised slightly as he talked, his voice deep. There was still a youthful and hopeful glint in his eyes.

You hoped he held onto that.

The conversation between yourself and the soldier lasted two hours or more. Eventually, you walked with him to his train station. Wives were kissing their husbands goodbye, sisters were hugging their brothers, kids were kissing their fathers and uncles goodbye, and mothers were drying their tears from the thoughts that they’d never see their sons again.

“You really should have let me walk you home,” Bucky told you.

You smiled and looked away, shaking your head. “No. It’s better this way.”

“If you say so.”

You nodded and looked back up at him in time to see his expression change. The smile faltered for a moment as his thoughts took over.

“You asked me before if I was meant to be meeting someone special tonight.”

You nodded, stepping a little closer. “I did.”

The smile returned on his face as you felt his hand take yours. He raised it between you both. “I think you were meant to be that someone special.”

You smiled, closing your eyes for a moment as he kissed your knuckles before kissing your palm. Soon, you felt the scratchy green material of his lapel under your palm, his kiss searing into your skin. You made a decision.

Pulling him in by his lapels, you leaned up and kissed him.

It was like electricity inside you before a calming wave of serenity took you over as he held you closer to him. All the other passengers on the train melted away; their voices became nothing but white noise behind you both.

Laying a hand over his heart, you heard the final whistle being called.

“Good luck, soldier.”

“Will you be here when I get back?”

You’d been moving from place to place on earth for the last five years. You never stayed in one place longer than a few months. You also never returned.

But that was the first time you’d broken your promise to yourself.

“When you get back, I’ll meet you at the cafe. You buy the coffee.”

Bucky chuckled. “Deal.”

He kissed you once more before one of the wardens walked by and tapped him on the back. “Better get on the train, son. Before it leaves without you.”

Bucky nodded, holding onto your hand and kissing your knuckles as you closed the door to the carriage with him.

“Wait, I-I need your address. To write to you.”

The train was starting to move. You didn’t want anyone to have your address, just in case.

“Write to the cafe!” You called over the sound of the horn. “I’ll write you back, I promise!”

The train was moving faster than people on the platform could keep up with and eventually you had to let go of his hand.

From the distance until the train disappeared, Bucky continued to wave goodbye to you.

A letter was waiting for you at the cafe two weeks later. You and Bucky wrote to each other for almost a year. Little did you know, those would be the only thing you’d have left from him.

A little over a year later, you found a thick letter waiting for you at the cafe. The waitress, Dottie, handed it over to you with a saddened look in her eye.

“The mailman dropped this by, this morning. I’m so sorry, honey.”

You sat down with a weight on your chest as you opened it. A sob caught in your throat as four letters fell out. Three of them you recognised immediately. Bucky’s handwriting. But the fourth…

In the cafe, sat in the same seat you’d first met Bucky on, you read from Captain America’s own handwriting. What had happened on the train, what had happened to Bucky, how he’d talked about you enough to let Steve know the final letters and pictures should be sent to you. He wrote about how sorry he was. A real funeral couldn’t be held until the war was over.

Without a body, it was simply about raising a toast for another young life given to a cause.

“Can I get you anything, honey?”

You wiped away your tears, quickly. “Yeah, um, can…can I get a cup of coffee. Please?”

Dottie nodded with a sad smile. “Of course, honey.”

So.

Sitting alone in the cafe you were meant to see him again, you raised a cup.

“I love you, soldier.”

When you finished, you thanked Dottie for everything and left her a large tip. That evening, you moved away and tried to move on.

It proved more difficult than you expected.

You’d lived thousands of years, seen thousands of people die, seen thousands of people fall in love. And yet, Bucky was the one person out of it all that never seemed to leave you.

After twenty or more years, you stopped running. Asguardian soldiers stopped hunting you, Loki came to find you and you both hashed out your grievances.

But despite all of that, you ended up settling back in Brooklyn. You watched as people went to and from work, forgetting the histories you’d lived through; creating futures they dreamed of.

You heard of Peggy starting up Shield. And one afternoon you strolled past the memorial set up in the soldiers’ memories.

And the first name you spotted was Bucky’s.

He’d been lost years before Shield, but Peggy still continued to honor Bucky alongside the rest. You kept your eye on his fellow Howling Commandos. Watched as they had kids, who eventually had kids of their own.

You watched them grow a family part of you still dreamed about with Bucky.

As the years passed by, you settled into ‘normal’ life. You dated every now and again, but none of them ever lasted. None of them contained that spark you had with Bucky. You didn’t mean to compare them, but what had happened in the 40s…

That was the kind of love that lasted a lifetime. The kind grandkids would look up to and say, “That’s the love I want out of life.”

Yet, as the years rolled by, things started to happen that even you had never seen before. Men came back from the dead. Men you had known.

First it was Steve. It was all over the news. A fallen soldier pulled out of the ice. A man out of his time.

You could still remember the thundering in your heart as you watched him run through Times Square.

He was alive?

He was alive.

“Oh, god.” You held a hand over your heart.

Three weeks later, all hell broke loose. Loki, a man you’d once considered a brother, an enemy, and then a friend. He decided to have a moment in the spotlight for all the world to see.

You had ran round New York, helping those you could. You tried to find him. You might not have seen each other in five decades, but you couldn’t just let him tear the world apart.

But The Avengers beat you to it. From there, Odin and Thor would handle the rest.

You thought about going back, but you never did. Something in you told you to stay for the sake of Steve. He didn’t know you existed. To him, you’d been long gone since the 40s. Probably dead.

If he only knew.

However, everything changed when he was made an enemy of the State and footage from a fight on the bridge made its way to social media. You watched as a masked man with a metal arm jumped onto a car and swaggered his way over, changing the clip in his gun.

CCTV footage that was shown on the six o’clock news revealed a fight between the ghost dubbed The Winter Soldier and Steve.

From there, your research began.

Decrypting Hydra files, travelling to countries you hadn’t seen since England’s Tudor era, facing climates some people would never know. But it was just before a bomb had been detonated outside the UN building that you came to discover the first successful subject of the Winter Soldier programme.

James Buchanan Barnes.

Bucky.

You’d eventually found yourself in Serbia, but you were far too late. All that was left were scratches on walls in place of a fight. And, considering Steve was on the run, it didn’t take a genius to work out who it had been between.

You searched for two years.

You had tried to contact Thor and Loki. Maybe they could help. But they were no use. Off world and fighting someone else, probably.

After a year and half in Wakanda, Bucky was finally free of the Winter Soldier’s control. And, ultimately, joined Steve to help weed out the final members of Hydra and The Red Room.

But the longer he spent with his fellow man out of time, he started to feel like he was being watched. Not by the Wakandans. Not even by his team. But by…a ghost.

He’d look across the street and see someone. But it was only a flash in his memory. Someone who’d been in his dreams long before the nightmares of Hydra took his mind over.

But it wasn’t.

Because a moment later, they were gone. A shadow in the dark. A sunray behind a tree branch.

It took another year, but Steve and his team somehow received a full padron. Probably had something to do with the whole world going to shit. But even as he lived a semi-normal life outside of the Tower and training facility, the memory seemed to constantly follow him.

Buses through the city, subway staircases, busy street-corner food trucks, green parks with enough space for kids and cyclists.

Then one day he found it wasn’t a memory at all, but rather a person.

The part of his mind that longed for his past was playing tricks on him. So, he made a decision.

And it was in a cold warehouse with a dusty concrete floor and broken ceiling lights, Bucky came face to face with his ghost.

You breathed heavily and smiled a little as his blue eyes landed on your gaze. “Hey, Soldier.”

Bucky couldn’t breathe. His hand still held onto your arm as you lay on the floor below him. “You…you…you’re not…this isn’t real.”

“I can explain.”

He was shocked, which you expected.

“Mind helping a girl up?”

Bucky, for a moment, did so. But then stopped, pinning you back onto the dusty floor. “How do I know this is even…you? Who are you?”

You understood completely. “The day we met, it was in a cafe. I bought you a cup of coffee and our waitress was called Dottie. You asked for my address and I told you to write to the cafe, instead.”

He believed you. You could see it in his eyes. You could also see that he didn’t believe it could be possible.

“I know I made you promise to buy me a cup of coffee the next time we saw each other, but I think I should buy this one.”

It took a little more convincing but eventually Bucky helped you up from the ground and walked with you to a cafe.

“Is this?”

You smiled and unlocked the door. “Yeah.”

You locked the door behind you once more and lowered the shutters a little more. Walking around the cafe bench, you started up the percolator. Turning around, you saw Bucky look around the place. Photos scattered the walls. Some that were still on the walls when he was young. But the more he looked, the more he noticed.

Old signs, posters and pictures. But the ones that stood out to him the most were the ones he was in. One from a pub table in London. Him, Steve, Peggy, and the Howling Commandos. A few more were filled with the same people. Others had soldiers Bucky had met or seen when he was still in the army. A few love letters had been framed and hung up, too.

“Couples.” Bucky looked at you as you spoke. “Turns out this place can bring people together in unexpected ways.”

He kept looking across the walls. That was when he saw an old receipt, the paper aged with time.

The receipt from the night he met you. Dottie’s name was scribbled across the top, the bill was at the bottom.

“Here,” you said as you began pouring the hot coffee. “Get it while it’s hot.”

Bucky took his old seat across from you, holding the mug in his two hands.

“Thanks.”

You smiled, “You’re welcome.”

“So,” Bucky took a sip of the hot drink. “When did you buy this place?”

“Mid 90s, I think. It was a cafe for a long time. Then a sandwich shop, then a laundry place. Eventually, it went on the market and…I took it on. Restored it back to what I remembered it to be.

Bucky nodded, impressed. But one question remained on his mind. And just like that night on the station floor, you watched as Bucky’s smile fell from his face. But this time, it didn’t return. Memories haunted his mind, part of him still not believing it to be true.

For all he knew, he was about to wake up.

“How are you here?”

You took your time explaining your past. How you were not from the world he knew…once knew. You were from a completely different one.

Asgard.

A few earth years before Bucky met you, you’d upset a lot of people. Specifically one of the princes. Eventually, you were pardoned when they realised you’d only meant kindness when you gave your opinion in the court that day.

You’d voted against Loki.

He was one of your closest friends, but you knew he wasn’t ready. Considering he was Odin’s son, most people voted for him.

As his closest friend, you’d not only betrayed him but also the throne he sat on.

You nearly got caught a few times, but managed to evade them. But despite all being forgiven, you’d decided to come back to the one place that had felt like home since you’d left Asgard.

“And you’ve been following me ever since?”

You nodded.

“So…in London? And Edinburgh?”

You nodded. “I didn’t think it was time for you to know, yet. But I wanted to make sure you were safe.”

“Does Steve know?”

You shook your head. “No. Peggy didn’t either. But I kept my eye on him when he came out of the ice. I waited for him to walk in here one day. He’d passed this place so many times. He would have known instantly considering the pictures I keep in here.”

“Why do you keep them here?”

You shrugged and smiled, if a little sadly. “Reminds me of a life I nearly had. Of a life others have had. That…” you gave a deep sigh, “that life keeps going but the past should never be forgotten. You never know when it might show up again.”

Bucky looked at you, and for the first time since the day he left you, he smiled.

Your soul felt light again.

Sheepishly, he looked at the cup in his hand before looking back at you. “I know I might be…”

Bucky took a guess at the amount of time.

“Eighty years too late. And that you might own this place but…would you mind me buying you a cup of coffee sometime?”

You nodded, trying to suppress the glow in your smile. “I’d love that.”

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xuexing-lumi · 18 days ago

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𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞'𝐬 𝐒𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 + 𝐃𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐓𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐭 𝐒𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 (𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞: 𝐏𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬) Pt.2

This isn’t your average love reading. This is about the one, the soul who already exists in your energetic field, even if they haven’t stepped into your life yet.(Spoiler: yes, but not in the way you think).

🌸 before you dive into part 2... make sure you’ve read part 1 so everything clicks perfectly and you don’t miss any of the details ✨

📎 read part 1 here: How Does Your Pile Contact Their Soulmate?

trust me, it sets the mood just right for what’s coming next 💌 pink skies, soft energy, and deeper truths ahead 💕

Close your eyes, take a deep breathe and pick your piles.

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 1

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 2

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 3

🌟𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 1 : Kunzite

Kunzite is a soft pink to lilac crystal known for its healing influence on the heart chakra, and most importantly, for its energy of receptive, childlike, pure love. It’s often associated with emotional vulnerability, spiritual awakening, and protection for those who’ve been hurt but still hope.

Part 2: How is Pile 1's Soulmate Doing in the Physical World Right Now?

(Seven of Pentacles, Six of Swords, Eight of Pentacles)

Right now, your soulmate is in a phase of deep evaluation. The Seven of Pentacles is a pause between planting and harvesting. In the physical world, they are likely investing their time, energy, and focus into something they care about deeply,this could be their career, studies, a personal healing journey, or even the slow, meticulous rebuilding of a life that once fell apart. They’re not rushing. In fact, they're exhausted from rushing. The kind of relationships or dreams they chased in the past may have left them drained, and this moment in their timeline is about intentionality. They are likely working hard at something but like they’re constantly questioning: “Is this worth it?” This applies not just to their job or health, but also to their emotional investments. Who they spend time with. Who they open up to. This person has become selective. Wise. Cautiously hopeful. They want a love they don’t have to recover from.

We saw the Six of Swords in your contact cards as well, which means that both you and your soulmate are undergoing parallel transitions. They may have just moved away from something emotionally painful similar to a breakup, grief, depression, toxic family entanglement, or even a version of themselves they no longer wish to be. Physically, they could be in a new city, a different job, or a quieter environment than they were in before. They are in a liminal space as a quiet chapter between endings and beginnings. It’s not glamorous. It’s not Instagrammable. It’s just real. A part of them still aches for comfort, but another part whispers, “I’m finally healing.” This card tells us they’ve released baggage, but they still look over their shoulder from time to time.

The Eight of Pentacles confirms that your soulmate is fully immersed in their self-betterment arc. This isn’t someone waiting around for love to fix them. They’re doing the hard work: improving their craft, learning emotional discipline, reparenting themselves, or healing their body. Whether they’re training for something, practicing new habits, going to therapy, or just trying to keep their inner world tidy AND they’re committed to the long game. This is a person who doesn’t want to offer a chaotic heart to someone ever again. They’ve done that. It didn’t end well. Now, they’re focused on becoming someone they themselves can be proud of before they let anyone new in. The way they’re showing up in the physical world is quietly consistent.

“You don’t have to be perfect to be loved.”

🌟𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 2: Pink Spinel

Pink Spinel is a stone of revitalization, emotional resilience, and regaining your spark after devastation, and we get a very specific kind of soul story.......this is someone who’s been cracked open and is trying to rise,but hasn’t yet let themselves fully break in order to heal properly.

Part 2: How is Pile 2's Soulmate Doing in the Physical World Right Now?

(Five of Wands reversed, The Tower reversed, and Queen of Pentacles reversed)

This person has been mentally and emotionally overwhelmed by conflict, but instead of confronting it or letting it flow through, they may be avoiding it, suppressing it, or trying to people-please their way out of it. In the upright, this card is chaos you can name: arguments, clashing egos, internal debates. But reversed, it’s messier like the chaos is happening inside. They may have just left a toxic situation or are still mentally trapped in one perhaps a job that drains them, a family environment filled with unspoken resentment, or even a friend group that subtly competes instead of supports. Either way, your soulmate is caught in a state of quiet combat. They're pretending things are fine on the surface, but their heart feels like a crowded, echoing room of arguments that were never resolved. They’re not just dealing with others like they’re at war with their own decisions.

This is the heart of their energy right now. The Tower reversed is a refusal to let go, fear of emotional collapse, and clinging to something that is no longer safe. Your soulmate is standing in the ruins of a situation that’s already cracked,maybe a relationship, a belief system, a way of living,but instead of surrendering to transformation, they’re resisting it. Why? Because letting go feels like death. And they’re scared of what comes after. They may be experiencing symptoms of burnout, insomnia, identity confusion, or sudden waves of anxiety. Their foundations what they thought was “stable”are crumbling.

In the reversed Queen of Pentacles, love becomes obligation. Care becomes exhaustion. They’ve poured so much of their soul into holding things together for others like friends, lovers, family that now they feel used, empty, and unworthy of receiving. They may even feel guilt at the idea of resting or putting themselves first. Their body might be showing signs: fatigue, hormonal imbalance, aches, disconnection from touch or pleasure.

“You’re not broken. You’re just tired of pretending you’re okay.”

🌟𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 3 : Rhodolite Garnet

Rhodolite Garnet ia a crystal of both the heart and root chakra, intensifies the theme of healing after manipulation, standing up for one’s truth, and learning how to love courageously again without self-betrayal.

Part 2: How is Pile 3's Soulmate Doing in the Physical World Right Now?

(Page of Swords, Ace of Pentacles, and Five of Swords)

Your soulmate is in a mental processing phase. They’re alert, curious, and perhaps even obsessed with understanding people like reading body language, observing conversations, doing their own inner research on who is safe and who is not. This person has been through something that sharpened their intuition but also made them slightly paranoid. They're wary of false promises and fake intentions. They may be someone who listens more than they speak. They might be a loner with strong online presence like scrolling through ideas, consuming a lot of information, but keeping their personal life private. In the physical world, they could be in a learning phase: a new job, new skill, or transitioning into a new role, but emotionally? They’re trying to figure out what love actually means when it doesn’t hurt.

This is a hopeful yet grounded card. Your soulmate may be manifesting a new lifestyle, new routine, or financial stability. There’s a desire in them to not just connect romantically but to build something real,something they can touch, taste, and trust.This card also suggests they are being given or will soon receive an opportunity that changes their direction. A job offer, relocation, new passion project, or even a surprising meeting could be the seed of transformation. Spiritually, this is the universe saying: “You’ve earned a clean slate.”

They may feel guarded, defensive, or even guilty for how they’ve had to cut people off. And this guilt becomes a block to love because part of them believes that protecting their peace made them selfish. But it didn’t. It made them free. Still, they're carrying emotional residue. Their mind replays old arguments. They wonder if they could’ve fixed things. They wonder if love always comes with pain.

"I want to start over… but it has to feel real this time."

✦ do you want a personal reading like this?

🌸 I offer:

Celebrity Tarot Reads (K-Pop, BTS, Actors) SP Manifestation Guidance Future Love + Shadow Work Spreads Moon-Coded Letter from Your Twin Flame Channeled Audio Readings + PDF Summaries ✧ First reading? Ask for a free pull!

—

📩 DMs Open: @xuexing-lumi Tumblr inbox

🖤 closing words from Lumi:

We ride or die, even through the mess. 💅 — Lumi, the Moon’s Bride 🌕💋

—

(ignore):

#tarot #tarot cards #tarot reading #tarotblr #tarotcommunity #pick a deck #tarot pick a card #pick a picture #pick a photo #pick a card #spiritual warfare #spiritual awakening #spiritual growth #spirituality #chanelling

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svt-luna · 6 months ago

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𝜗℘ TALKING TO THE MOON

❛ 𝘢𝘵 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘶𝘱 𝘮𝘺 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮, 𝘪 𝘴𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘺 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧— 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯, 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘯𝘢 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘮 𝘪 𝘢 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯? ❜

timeline: 2018

synopsis: After months of avoidance and awkward interactions, two hearts finally break their barriers, sharing confessions under the moonlight and finding the closure they both desperately needed.

wc: 9.7k

warnings: angst, cursing, crying, arguments, mentions of anxiety, yelling, “i hate you!” (lies), closure, confessions, reconciliation, some heart-wrenching shit, simp!Jeonghan, scared!Luna, heart-to-heart talks, explanations, Yoon Jeonghan will be on his knees… begging, heartfelt, hopeful, somewhat a happy and silly ending, ends with fluff

due to popular demand of more angst here is more of the rejection aftermath. this story takes place after If Only & Can I Be Him? and takes place before His English Love Affair. so i highly recommend reading everything in order to understand. every single one-shot in my blog is arranged in chronological order in the writings masterlist which is linked below👇 happy reading, my loves 🤍🩵

╰ ౨ৎ LUNA-VERSE MASTERLIST ╰ ౨ৎ writings masterlist

Jeonghan is an island.

Not in the literal sense, but in the way he exists.

To him, being an island means standing steady amidst the tide, a constant presence when the waves threaten to overwhelm those around him.

Jeonghan has always seen himself that way— a safe haven for his loved ones, a place they could come to with their burdens and leave feeling just a little lighter.

He takes pride in this role, knowing that if someone he cares about feels lost, they can always find their way back to him. And when they’re ready to leave, to set sail again, he’ll let them go with a quiet smile, no questions asked. He exists as a constant— a refuge, a quiet place to rest before facing the storm again.

Jeonghan has always been that for the people he loves, and he wouldn’t have it any other way. When the members of SEVENTEEN come to him, seeking advice, a listening ear, or simply someone to sit with in silence, Jeonghan is there.

He listens patiently, his eyes fixed on theirs with a quiet intensity that tells them he is fully present. He doesn’t rush to fill the silence with platitudes or fix their problems for them. Instead, he allows them to speak, unraveling their worries, frustrations, and fears as he holds space for them.

More often than not, the members leave those moments with him feeling lighter. They walk away with the weight of their worries softened, bolstered by his quiet reassurances or the practical wisdom he dispenses so naturally.

In their world of relentless schedules and pressure, Jeonghan is their counselor, their confidant, their steady shore.

But no one seeks him out more than Luna.

For as long as Jeonghan could remember, Luna had always gravitated toward him in times of need.

Out of thirteen members, she could have turned to anyone. Each of them was capable in their own way— each a pillar of strength, kindness, and understanding. And yet, time and time again, Luna came to Jeonghan.

It wasn’t because he was the most understanding or the most overtly comforting. It wasn’t because he had all the answers. It was simply because Jeonghan knew how to listen.

He listened in a way that made you feel seen.

Truly seen.

Luna would come to him during her moments of doubt, her voice cracking under the weight of frustration or pain. Sometimes, she would rant about the pressures of their industry, her words tumbling out in rapid succession as she paced the room with clenched fists. Other times, she would sit quietly, her eyes filled with unshed tears, as she shared her fears, her insecurities, and the thoughts that kept her awake at night.

And Jeonghan— he would just listen.

He never judged. Never interrupted. He let her speak until her voice grew hoarse or until she could no longer hold back her tears.

On some occasions, Luna didn’t want advice; she just needed someone to bear witness to her pain, and Jeonghan respected that.

When she didn’t need solutions, he didn’t offer any. He simply sat there, unwavering, his presence a balm to her raw emotions.

On other occasions, Luna would fall apart completely, her sobs breaking through the walls she worked so hard to build. And Jeonghan would be there, his arms wrapping around her as she cried into his chest, clinging to him like he was the only thing keeping her grounded. He’d rest his chin on her head, murmuring soft reassurances or nothing at all, letting her release everything she had bottled up inside. He would hold her until her tears subsided and her breathing evened out, and even then, he wouldn’t let go until she was ready.

Sometimes, when the tears had stopped, Luna would stay in his embrace, her head resting on his shoulder as she whispered, “Thank you.”

Those moments would stick with him long after she left, her gratitude settling in his chest like a warm, lingering weight.

Jeonghan never failed her.

Not once.

Whenever Luna needed him— whether it was for advice, for a hug, or simply for a quiet moment of understanding— he was there, always.

And for him, that was enough. To be her constant, her refuge, her island.

It was a privilege Jeonghan remembered to never take for granted.

He also remembered how Luna had been the first person to offer herself to be his island when he needed it most.

It was years ago, back when they were merely trainees, their dreams raw and fragile, and their bodies pushed to the brink of exhaustion day after day. He was seventeen then, and she was just sixteen, both of them barely holding it together under the immense weight of expectations.

Yet somehow, amidst the chaos of it all, they had found each other.

It was late at night, the kind of late where the world was quiet, and even Seoul seemed to pause and take a breath.

The two of them sat by the Han River, tucked away in a secluded corner where no one would find them. The air was cool but not biting, a gentle breeze carrying the scent of water and earth. The river stretched out before them, dark and glimmering under the moonlight, its surface rippling faintly with the movement of the current. Above them, the sky was a deep navy, scattered with stars that peeked through the haze of city lights.

It was peaceful, the kind of peace that allowed them to simply exist without pretense.

Jeonghan had leaned back on his elbows, his legs stretched out in front of him, watching the water shimmer. Luna sat cross-legged beside him, her chin resting on her knees, her face illuminated by the soft silver glow of the moon. She looked so serene, as if the weight she carried every day had been momentarily lifted, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but feel a small sense of pride that maybe, just maybe, he had helped with that.

They had been talking for hours, their conversation meandering between dreams and struggles, fears and hopes. Luna had shared her frustrations— the grueling hours of practice, the aching muscles that never seemed to heal, the pressure to prove herself in a room full of talent. She had spoken about her fear of failure, of being left behind, and Jeonghan had listened quietly, nodding when appropriate, offering a few words of comfort when needed.

And then, when she had finally fallen silent, Jeonghan had spoken softly, his voice carrying the kind of weight that came from someone who understood exactly what she was going through.

“Nana-ya,” he said, his gaze still fixed on the river, “if it ever gets too much… you can come to me, you know? Just like this.”

She turned her head to look at him, her eyes wide and curious.

“I mean it,” he continued, his voice firm but gentle. “If you’re ever feeling overwhelmed, if you just need a break… I’ll be your island. A place to rest.”

Luna blinked at him, her expression softening as his words sank in. “An island?” she repeated, a small, amused smile tugging at her lips.

“Yeah,” Jeonghan replied, sitting up now and turning to face her. “An island. Somewhere you can come to when you need to escape. No judgment, no pressure. You can tell me all your worries or you can just… rest. And when you’re ready, you can leave and come back whenever you want.”

Luna looked at him for a long moment, her eyes searching his face as if she were trying to memorize every detail. Then, she tilted her head slightly, her smile widening.

“But what about you?”

Jeonghan frowned, confused. “What about me?”

Luna’s gaze didn’t waver. “Who’s going to be your island, Hannie?”

The question caught him off guard.

No one had ever asked him that before.

Jeonghan stared at her, his lips parting slightly as he struggled to find an answer. But before he could say anything, Luna leaned closer, her voice soft but certain.

“I can be your island, Hannie.”

Jeonghan froze, his heart skipping a beat as he stared at her.

Luna was looking at him with such earnestness, her smile so warm and genuine that it made his chest ache. The moonlight framed her face, highlighting the delicate curve of her jaw, the faint blush on her cheeks, and the gentle sparkle in her eyes. She looked like a dream, so achingly beautiful that it took everything in him not to reach out and brush a strand of hair from her face. The moonlight softened her features, illuminating her skin with a silver glow, and he found himself thinking that she had never looked more beautiful than she did in this moment of quiet contemplation.

In that moment, seventeen-year-old Jeonghan knew.

He had known since the first time he saw her that he had a crush on her— how could he not? Every trainee did.

But now, as she sat there offering herself to him in a way no one else ever had, he realized it was so much more than a crush. It was something deeper, something that made his heart feel too big for his chest and his thoughts spiral in directions he couldn’t control.

And yet, he shook his head mentally, pushing the thought away before it could consume him. Instead, he let a teasing smile curl on his lips.

“Island, huh?” he said, his tone light and playful. “You’re going to have to come up with a new term, Nana-ya. Island is mine. I’m trademarking it.”

Luna rolled her eyes, her laugh soft but genuine. “Alright, fine,” she replied, her voice tinged with amusement. “I’ll think of something else.”

They chuckled together, the sound mingling with the gentle lapping of the water against the riverbank. Slowly, their laughter faded, leaving behind a comfortable silence that felt as natural as breathing.

Luna tilted her head back, her gaze fixed on the moon hanging high above them, its pale light casting a soft glow over the world.

Jeonghan, however, didn’t look at the moon.

He couldn’t.

Because the moon was sitting right next to him.

Jeonghan let the comfortable silence stretch between them.

The sound of the river’s quiet ripples filled the air, mingling with the distant hum of the city. For a moment, neither of them spoke.

“Han?”

Her voice broke the silence, soft but deliberate.

Jeonghan hummed in acknowledgment, his head tilting slightly toward her.

“You know what I’m named after, right?” she asked, finally turning to face him.

Jeonghan nodded without hesitation, his lips curving into a faint smile. “The moon.”

Luna’s grin widened as she nodded in return, impressed by his certainty. Of course, he remembered— she had told him once, during one of their late-night conversations in the practice room, how her mother had chosen her name because of her fascination with the moon.

“My mom is weirdly obsessed with the moon,” Luna chuckled, turning back to gaze at it. Her voice was light, but there was a warmth to it, a fondness that Jeonghan could hear clearly.

Jeonghan stayed quiet, watching her from behind. He didn’t interrupt; he knew she was building toward something.

“She used to tell me that when she was younger, she’d talk to the moon about her worries and her problems.

“Talk to it?” Jeonghan asked, his tone laced with curiosity but devoid of judgment.

“Not out loud,” Luna explained, gesturing with her hands as if trying to clarify. “More like… mentally, you know? Just looking up at it and mentally speaking to it. Does that make sense?”

Jeonghan’s lips twitched upward, his gaze never leaving her animated expression as she spoke. “It does,” he said simply, his voice carrying a hint of admiration. “Her heart speaks to it.”

Luna paused, her hands falling to her lap as she turned to look at him. Her wide eyes shimmered with surprise, as if she hadn’t expected him to understand so easily.

Most people laughed or dismissed the story as strange, but not Jeonghan.

Never Jeonghan. He always understood.

“Yes,” she said softly, her voice almost a whisper. She smiled, small and appreciative, and for a moment, she felt her heart skip a beat. Then, as if shaking herself out of her thoughts, she laughed lightly. “Anyway, sometimes I like to do that too. Just stare at the moon and… mentally talk to it. It’s comforting. So maybe you can do that too.”

Jeonghan tilted his head slightly, his gaze unwavering as he watched her. “Talk to the moon?” he mused, his tone teasing but thoughtful.

“Yeah,” Luna nodded, her smile growing.

They fell into silence again, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Jeonghan continued to admire her in quiet fascination, while Luna seemed lost in her own world, her gaze fixed on the moon above.

Then she giggled, her laughter light and airy, breaking the stillness. “There are even stories and myths about the man in the moon,” she said with a smirk, turning to face him.

Jeonghan raised an eyebrow, his curiosity piqued. “The man in the moon? You mean the little boy fishing?”

Luna blinked at him, her brow furrowing in confusion.

It took her a moment before realization dawned, and she burst out laughing. “That’s the ‘DreamWorks’ intro! Not that!”

Jeonghan smirked at her, his expression playful. “No? You and your mom aren’t talking to a little boy fishing in the moon?”

Luna scrunched her nose at him, pretending to pout as she glared. But her mock annoyance quickly melted into giggles. “No, silly,” she said, rolling her eyes as she shifted closer, lying down beside him. She rested her head against his outstretched arm, her body relaxing into his warmth.

She pointed toward the moon, her finger tracing invisible patterns in the sky. “They call it ‘the man in the moon’ because sometimes, if you look closely, it looks like it has a face. See?”

Jeonghan followed the direction of her finger, his eyes narrowing slightly as he focused on the craters. “Hmm,” he said after a moment. “It does.”

“See?” Luna said again, her voice tinged with pride. She turned to him with a triumphant smile. “So instead of an island, you can talk to the moon.”

Jeonghan’s eyes softened as they met hers, a small smile playing on his lips. “I already do talk to my moon.”

Luna’s brows furrowed, her head tilting in confusion. “Your moon?” she echoed. “You do? What do you tell it?”

“You tell me,” Jeonghan said, his voice lowering ever so slightly. He finally looked down at her, their faces inches apart, his gaze steady and unwavering. “You’re the only moon I talk to.”

Luna’s breath hitched. Her cheeks flushed a deep red as his words settled in, her heart thudding against her ribcage. But she didn’t say anything, her lips curving into a soft smile instead.

That moment of silence carried a weight to it, one filled with unspoken understanding.

And from then on, Jeonghan’s favorite nickname for her was born.

His moon.

His pretty moon.

From the moment under the moonlight at Han River, Jeonghan and Luna had unknowingly started a tradition— one that became their sanctuary amidst the chaos of their lives.

It began innocently, born from that night when a seventeen-year-old Jeonghan and a sixteen-year-old Luna shared their hearts under the stars.

Whenever the weight of their training bore down on them, they’d find themselves wandering back to that secluded spot by the Han River. It became their unspoken agreement: no matter how tired, how frustrated, or how uncertain they felt about their futures, they’d sit side by side and talk.

They’d talk about everything and nothing.

The worries that festered in their minds, the dreams that seemed just out of reach, the frustrations of not being good enough in their own eyes. Sometimes they’d rant, voices loud and passionate, the river carrying their words away like an invisible confidant. Other times, they’d fall into contemplative silences, punctuated only by the sounds of water lapping at the shore or the rustling of trees in the night breeze.

Even after debuting and becoming idols, Jeonghan and Luna fought to keep this tradition alive.

Their once-frequent visits to Han River dwindled as schedules filled with practices, performances, and public appearances.

But they found ways to adapt.

Instead of sitting by the river, they’d sit on the floor of one of their apartments, cups of tea— or sometimes wine— cradled in their hands as they leaned against the sofa, talking until the early hours of the morning.

When their schedules took them abroad, hotel rooms became their new haven. No matter where they were, Jeonghan and Luna made time for each other when they needed it most.

But everything changed almost a year ago.

Jeonghan hadn’t realized how much he’d come to rely on those late-night talks until they were gone. He hadn’t understood how much Luna’s quiet wisdom and steady presence meant to him until he lost it.

The last time they had one of their late-night conversations was a night that Jeonghan replayed in his mind more often than he cared to admit.

It had started like all the others— a quiet moment after a long day, a bottle of wine between them, and an unspoken understanding that they were each other’s safe space. But that night had taken an unexpected turn when Luna, cheeks flushed and words slightly slurred, had confessed her feelings for him.

“You make me feel things,” she had said, her voice barely above a whisper but heavy with emotion. “And I hate it.”

Jeonghan had been stunned, caught completely off guard. For a moment, he didn’t know what to say. But the sincerity in her eyes, the vulnerability in her expression, made him painfully aware of the weight of his next words.

He had declined her feelings a few days after— not out of malice, but because he was scared, it was risky. Also because he wasn’t sure he could be what she deserved at that moment. Before he had the opportunity to tell her as much, Luna brushed it off and dashed out the elevator, his heart aching at the way her face fell.

Since then, everything between them had changed.

The awkwardness was subtle at first, but it grew with time. Their once-effortless conversations became stilted, filled with polite exchanges that lacked their usual warmth. When they were alone, the silences between them were no longer comfortable but heavy with unspoken words.

Even in group settings, Jeonghan felt the shift. Luna would exchange a few words with him here and there, but she gravitated toward Mingyu more and more.

It hadn’t taken Jeonghan long to notice the way Mingyu had become Luna’s confidant. He saw how Mingyu stayed by her side, offering her the support that Jeonghan no longer could. And while a part of him was relieved that she had someone to lean on, another part of him couldn’t ignore the pang of jealousy that crept into his chest whenever he saw them together.

So, Jeonghan gave her the space she seemed to want. He told himself it was for the best, that she deserved to heal in her own way and in her own time. He respected her boundaries, even though it meant losing the one person who had always been his island… his moon.

Now, as he sat alone in his apartment, the memories of those late-night talks played in his mind like scenes from a movie. He could still hear the sound of her laughter, see the way her eyes lit up when she spoke about something she was passionate about.

He could still feel the comfort of her presence, the way she always knew what to say to ease his mind.

And Jeonghan missed her.

He missed his moon.

Jeonghan sat on his couch, the glow from the city lights spilling through the window casting faint patterns across his living room. His mind churned endlessly, cycling through the same thoughts that had been haunting him for months now.

No matter how much he tried to shake them off, they persisted. He leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, and sighed deeply, raking a hand through his hair.

His gaze drifted to the moonlit sky outside, and without realizing it, his mind wandered back to that first late-night talk at the Han River with Luna.

It was so many years ago, yet the memory was so vivid it felt like it had happened yesterday. He remembered the way the moonlight reflected on the water, how their quiet voices had melded with the soft sound of the current. He could almost hear her voice again, playful yet serious, telling him to talk to the moon when he’s struggling.

Jeonghan leaned back against the couch, a bitter smile tugging at his lips. If he was honest, he’d never taken her advice— not because he thought it was foolish, but because he never needed to.

Why talk to the moon when he’d always had her?

Whenever he was drowning in worries or self-doubt, Luna had been his island. His anchor. His moon. The one person who understood him without him having to explain.

But now, with a gulf between them that felt impossible to cross, her advice suddenly didn’t seem so silly.

So for the past few months Jeonghan has been looking up at the moon, watching it as he mentally cried his heart out.

Tonight was no different. But tonight something was pulling him to talk to the moon somewhere else.

With that, Jeonghan stood up. He grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair and reached for his car keys on the counter. His decision felt impulsive but right, like this was exactly what he needed to do.

Han River, the sanctuary they had shared so many times. But this time, he’d be going alone.

As he stepped into the hallway, the familiar sound of a door closing echoed from just beside his own. He froze, the keys in his hand jangling softly, and turned his head toward the apartment next to his. His breath hitched as Luna emerged, bundled in an oversized jacket, her own car keys clutched in her hand. She was locking her door, her movements deliberate yet distracted.

When Luna finally looked up, her gaze met his, and they both froze.

For a moment, neither of them said a word. It was as if time had slowed, the hallway shrinking to just the two of them.

It wasn’t like they hadn’t seen each other earlier that day— they’d been side by side for a team photoshoot, exchanging polite but distant words.

Yet, this moment felt different.

Charged.

Jeonghan’s first thought was that the universe must have grown tired of watching them avoid each other.

As cliché as it was— there was no other explanation.

This had to be fate’s way of giving them a nudge— a forceful push, really.

Luna blinked, breaking the spell, but her surprise was evident. Jeonghan noticed the way her fingers tightened briefly on her keys, her lips parting as though she wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words.

Instead, they just stared at each other, a strange understanding passing between them.

Because in that instant, they both knew.

They didn’t need to ask where the other was going. They already knew the answer.

Han River.

Luna was the first to glance away, her cheeks faintly pink under the hallway’s dim lighting. She shifted her weight awkwardly, clutching her keys tighter as if that would ground her.

Jeonghan, however, stayed rooted, his mind a whirlwind of thoughts. After a beat of silence, he extended his hand toward her.

“Come on,” he said softly, his voice low but steady.

Luna’s eyes flicked to his hand, then back to his face, searching for something in his expression. His gaze was calm, open, almost expectant. After a pause that felt much longer than it really was, she reached out and slid her hand into his. Her fingers were cold against his warmth, and something unspoken passed between them as Jeonghan gently guided her toward the elevator.

The ride down was quiet. Not awkward, but not entirely comfortable either. It was a silence that carried acceptance— an understanding that neither of them could put into words just yet.

The elevator’s soft hum filled the space as they stood side by side, their hands still loosely linked. Jeonghan glanced at their joined hands briefly before looking ahead, lost in thought.

It was ironic, he thought, how the last time they were in this elevator alone, everything had changed.

Almost a year ago, Luna had laid her heart bare, only for him to gently decline.

That night had been a turning point, one that neither of them could ignore, no matter how much they tried to move on. And now, here they were again, in the same space but under entirely different circumstances.

Jeonghan didn’t miss the symmetry of it, nor the weight of what tonight could mean.

For both of them, this was the night to finally talk. To lay everything out in the open. It was either the start of mending what had been broken or the final thread that would unravel everything completely.

Jeonghan silently hoped— prayed— it would be the former.

He didn’t look at Luna, but he could feel her presence beside him, her quiet breathing grounding him.

And though neither of them spoke, he knew she was thinking the same thing.

Soon Jeonghan was driving them to Han River.

The car ride was steeped in silence, the kind that carried its own weight yet wasn’t entirely unbearable. Jeonghan kept his hands on the steering wheel, his eyes focused on the road ahead, while Luna sat in the passenger seat, her head resting lightly against the window.

The hum of the engine filled the space, accompanied by the soft tunes of the radio playing in the background. The music— a blend of mellow piano and soft vocals— felt like a balm, easing the tension between them, though neither of them acknowledged it.

The thirty-minute drive stretched on, both of them lost in their thoughts.

Jeonghan occasionally glanced at Luna from the corner of his eye, noting how her fingers fidgeted with the hem of her sweater. He wanted to say something, anything, to break the silence, but every time he opened his mouth, the words seemed to falter before they could form. So instead, he let the music fill the gaps, hoping it was enough to make the quiet less suffocating.

When they finally arrived at the Han River, Jeonghan pulled into their usual spot. It was secluded, a little pocket of peace away from the bustling city— a place that had become theirs over the years. He turned off the car and stepped out, the crisp night air biting at his skin.

Without a word, he walked to the passenger side and opened her door. Luna blinked up at him, momentarily startled, but she accepted his silent gesture, stepping out into the cool night.

From then on it was like clockwork.

Jeonghan made his way to the trunk, where he pulled out a blanket. It was old and slightly worn but soft, and it had lived in his car for years —just for nights like this. Draping it over one arm, he turned back to Luna, intertwining his fingers with hers without hesitation. Her hand felt cold in his, but she didn’t pull away. Gently, he guided her down the familiar path to their secluded spot by the riverbank.

Once they reached the spot, Jeonghan spread the blanket out on the grass, smoothing it down with deliberate care.

They both sat down, the sound of the river lapping softly against the shore filling the space between them. Overhead, the sky was clear, stars scattered like tiny diamonds, and the moon hung low and luminous, casting its glow over the water.

For a while, neither of them spoke. They just sat there, side by side, watching the river and the sky in a silence that felt heavier than the one in the car.

Finally, Jeonghan broke it.

“It’s been a while since we’ve been here together,” he said, his voice low but carrying over the stillness of the night. He glanced sideways at her. “You still come here often?”

Luna turned to him, slightly taken aback by his casual tone. She studied his profile for a moment before answering. “Not as much lately,” she admitted, her voice softer now. “It hasn’t felt… the same.”

Jeonghan nodded in understanding, his gaze fixed on the river. “Yeah. I know.” He paused, a faint smile tugging at his lips as a memory surfaced. He chuckled lightly, the sound breaking through the somber air. “Remember the last time? You were mad at me because I forgot your coffee order, and you swore you’d never trust me with your drinks again.”

Luna raised an eyebrow, her lips twitching into the faintest of smiles. That smile sent a jolt straight to Jeonghan’s heart. She hadn’t smiled at him like that in so long. And he had made it happen. He had.

“You brought me iced coffee in the middle of winter, Han,” she replied dryly, her tone tinged with amusement. “You’re lucky I didn’t throw it at you.”

Jeonghan chuckled, his smile widening as he looked at her. “Right. And then you made me drink it as punishment.”

“I did,” she said with a small nod, her gaze drifting back to the moon.

A brief silence fell over them again, but this one felt different. It wasn’t entirely uncomfortable, but it carried the weight of all the things left unsaid.

Jeonghan shifted slightly, the grass crunching softly beneath him, and his tone grew quieter when he spoke again.

“I didn’t think you’d agree to come with me,” he admitted, his eyes trained on her face now.

Luna sighed softly, her shoulders rising and falling. “I almost didn’t.”

Her words made his chest tighten, but he turned to face her fully. “I’ve missed this,” he said, his voice earnest. “I’ve missed you. I missed us… Jiyeon-ah, I—”

“Please,” Luna interrupted with a soft sigh, shaking her head. “You don’t have to apologize.”

Jeonghan frowned slightly, his brows drawing together. “No, you’re right,” he said after a moment, his tone steady. “I don’t have to apologize… I need to apologize.”

He met her gaze, his eyes searching hers. “I’m sorry. For everything. For hurting you. For that night… for lying that night.”

Luna looked away before he could continue, her voice low as she said, “Are you sorry because you hurt me, or is it because you don’t feel the same about me?” Her voice softened even further, though her eyes glistened with unshed tears as she continued. “Han, I forgave you already that night in the elevator. I was hurt, yes, but I understood. I just needed space. I never blamed you for not liking—”

“Ya… Bae Jiyeon, stop. Just stop.” Jeonghan’s voice was firm now, his tone cutting her off sharply. He turned to her fully, his eyes blazing with frustration and something else—something deeper. “First of all, stop saying I don’t like you. That’s not true. Not even in the slightest. And stop it with the calm, good girl act you force yourself to be. I know you more than anyone. I need you to be angry. Be angry at me. Yell at me. Fuck, slap me in the face for hurting you and making you cry! Don’t pretend you’re okay, because I know damn well you’re not!”

Luna’s head snapped up, her eyes locking with his for more than a few seconds, truly and deeply looking at him for the first time since they had caught each other outside their apartments earlier. Her eyes were red, tears welling up and threatening to spill over.

Jeonghan read her like an open book, every emotion she had tried so desperately to hide laid bare before him. And he knew— he knew— that she was lying to herself, trying to shove everything under the rug and pretend it didn’t matter.

But it did.

And it was hurting her.

Jeonghan’s heart clenched as he watched her, knowing this moment was long overdue.

Luna had been bottling up her pain for far too long.

She needed to let it out— now.

Luna’s hands trembled as she clenched them into fists at her sides, her entire body taut with the emotions she had suppressed for so long. For a brief moment, Jeonghan thought she might hold it in again, that she’d swallow the words she desperately needed to say and give him the same composed facade she always wore.

But then, her lips parted, and the dam broke.

“You want me mad?” Luna’s voice came out sharp, her tone cutting through the stillness like a blade. “You want me to scream and cry? You want me to tell you the truth? Fine!” Her voice rose, trembling slightly as her emotions began spilling out. “What do you want me to say, huh, Jeonghan? Do you want me to tell you how you’ve had me wrapped around your stupid finger since the fucking beginning?”

Jeonghan’s breath caught, but he stayed silent, letting her continue.

“Do you want me to tell you how the second you introduced yourself to me, I knew— I knew— that I needed you in my life? How every single night, I beat myself up trying to forget about my feelings for you because I couldn’t risk it? I couldn’t risk our friendship, the group, our careers, the guys’ careers! Do you want me to tell you how my heart hurts— no, how it shatters— every time you get linked with someone else, rumored with women you barely even know? And do you know what’s worse? I have no right to feel that way! None! Yet… fuck! I still do!”

Her voice cracked, but she pushed forward, her words gaining momentum as tears began to glisten in her eyes.

“Do you want to know how I cried to my mom on the phone, begging her to help me like I was a child because my heart wouldn’t stop pounding after you kissed me on the cheek for the first time when we were trainees? A stupid, innocent kiss! It was nothing to you, but it meant everything to me!”

Jeonghan’s heart squeezed painfully in his chest, guilt twisting like a knife as her voice started to tremble.

“Do you want me to tell you how much you make me feel? How much I love the way you make me feel so special, so loved, so pretty? And how much I hate it? How much I hate how I love it, because it’s you! It you, Yoon Jeonghan! It’s you who makes me feel like that, and it’s you who made me feel like I was nothing that night!”

Her voice broke, and the tears finally spilled over, streaming down her cheeks. She wiped at them furiously, but it was no use— they just kept coming.

“I cried myself to sleep on the floor of my apartment after you rejected me,” she admitted, her voice now raw and unsteady, her breath hitching between words. “The floor, Jeonghan. I couldn’t even make it to my bed because I thought I’d suffocate under the weight of it all.”

Jeonghan’s throat tightened, his hands curling into fists in his lap as he fought the urge to reach out to her, to stop the flood of her pain even though he knew she needed this.

“And do you want to know the worst part?” Luna’s voice dropped to a whisper, trembling with the weight of her confession. She lifted her gaze to meet his, her eyes glistening with tears that reflected the moonlight.

“I hate how much I love you.” Her voice broke completely, and she sobbed openly now, the sound raw and anguished. “I hate it, Jeonghan. I hate how much I love you, and I hate how much it hurts to love you.”

Jeonghan couldn’t stay silent any longer. “Jiyeon—”

“No!” she cut him off, her voice rising again despite her tears. “You wanted this, right? You told me to let it out, so here it is! Here’s the truth, Yoon Jeonghan! I love you, and I hate you for making me love you this much! So much that it physically hurts me! Is that what you wanted to hear? Is that what you—”

Before she could finish, Jeonghan surged forward, wrapping his arms around her trembling frame and pulling her tightly into his chest.

Luna struggled against him, her fists pounding weakly against his chest as she sobbed, her frustration spilling over in the form of muffled cries and anger. “Let go of me! Let me go, Jeonghan!” she cried, her voice muffled against his shirt. “I don’t want— just let me—”

“No,” Jeonghan said firmly, his voice low but steady. He held her tighter, refusing to let her go no matter how much she fought him. “I’m not letting you go, Bae Jiyeon. Not now. Not ever.”

Luna’s struggles slowed, her fists unclenching as she slumped against him, her sobs shaking her entire body. “I hate you. I hate how much I love you,” she whispered brokenly, her words muffled against his chest.

Jeonghan squeezed his eyes shut, his chin resting lightly atop her head as he struggled to keep his composure. His own voice trembled when he spoke, filled with the weight of everything he’d been holding back. “I’m sorry, my moon. I’m so sorry.”

Luna’s cries quieted into broken hiccups as her face remained buried in Jeonghan’s chest, her tears soaking into his shirt as the weight of her pain finally found its release. Her fists, now slack against his shirt, clutched weakly at the fabric as her shoulders trembled. She mumbled against him, her voice muffled yet still laden with hurt.

“You made me feel like I was stupid for even trying,” she whispered, her words cracking under the weight of her emotions. Her chest heaved as she struggled to steady her breath, but her next words came out shakier, weaker. “Like I was crazy for thinking… for hoping…”

A sharp hiccup cut her off, and she dissolved into tears again. Jeonghan’s hand instinctively cradled the back of her head, his fingers threading through her hair in an attempt to soothe her. He sighed deeply, the sound heavy with guilt and sorrow, before murmuring gently, “I know. I know, angel. And I hate myself for it.”

His voice wavered, but he kept his tone steady for her. “I was scared. I didn’t know what to do with how I felt—”

Before he could finish, Luna abruptly pushed herself out of his grip, her hands pressing against his chest until she could create enough distance between them. Her eyes met his, wide and glistening with tears, her cheeks flushed from crying. The vulnerability in her gaze was quickly overtaken by anger, sharp and raw.

“How you felt?” she snapped, her voice rising. “Han, this wasn’t just about you. It’s about me too—about us. Do you even know what it’s like to pour your heart out to someone you’ve loved for years only to have them look at you like it’s all a mistake?”

Her words hit Jeonghan like a slap, and he instinctively shook his head, the motion frantic as if it could erase the idea entirely. “No,” he said quickly, his voice firm yet pleading. “No, Jiyeon. You were never a mistake. I need you to believe that. Please.”

Luna’s lips quivered, her glare unwavering despite the fresh wave of tears brimming in her eyes.

Jeonghan took a deep breath, his own voice trembling as he continued. “I was an idiot. I am an idiot,” he admitted, his shoulders sagging as the truth spilled out of him like a confession. “I… I was scared because you mean so much to me. I told myself it would ruin everything if we tried and failed. I kept convincing myself it was better this way, safer, for both of us. I told myself all these excuses why it wouldn’t work— why I shouldn’t feel the way I feel. But they were just that… excuses. I was a coward, okay? I let my fear control me. And because of that, I hurt you. I hurt us.”

His voice cracked on the last word, and he looked at her with desperate, searching eyes, as if silently begging her to understand.

Luna stared at him for a long moment, her expression etched with a mixture of disbelief and pain. Finally, she shook her head, her voice barely above a whisper. “Do you think it didn’t terrify me too?”

Jeonghan froze, his breath hitching as she spoke, her voice growing stronger with each word.

“But I still chose to try. Yes I was drunk when i confessed but I never denied it afterwards. I could’ve acted like I didn’t remember what I said but I didn’t,” she continued, her voice breaking again as tears spilled over her lashes. “Because… because loving you felt worth the risk.”

Jeonghan felt his heart shatter at her words, the weight of her pain crashing down on him like a tidal wave. Without thinking, he cupped her face in his hands, his thumbs brushing against her wet cheeks as he tried to catch the tears that kept falling.

“You’re braver than me,” he said softly, his voice full of admiration and regret. “You always have been.”

Luna shook her head furiously, her chest heaving with shallow, uneven breaths. Her hands came up to grip his wrists as if to push him away, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. “I don’t feel brave, Hannie,” she hiccuped, her voice barely audible. “I feel broken.”

Her words tore through Jeonghan like a knife, and he could feel his composure slipping as she finished, her voice raw and trembling.

“You broke me,” she said, her lips quivering as another tear slid down her cheek. “And it hurts.”

Jeonghan froze as her trembling words struck him like a blow. Her tear-streaked face, her voice breaking with pain— every part of her screamed of the hurt he’d caused, and it was unbearable.

Jeonghan shook his head, his voice low but steady, desperate to reach her. “I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to fix it if you’ll let me,” he said, his hands firm yet gentle on her arms. “I’ll undo all the words that hurt you. Just tell me how.”

Luna’s breath hitched, her voice sharp and trembling as she shot back, “What good are words when they always just get in our way, Han?”

Her challenge hung in the air, raw and heavy, but Jeonghan didn’t falter. His brows furrowed as his dark eyes bore into hers, soft yet resolute.

“Because words matter,” he countered firmly, his voice calm and measured. “Words are what brought us to this moment. I said the wrong ones before, but I won’t stop trying until I say the right ones. I can’t give up, Bae Jiyeon. Not on you.”

Her tears continued to fall, and Jeonghan reached forward, brushing the strands of hair that clung to her damp cheeks. His fingers moved slowly, tenderly, as though she were something fragile and sacred. His hands found her face, cradling it, urging her to look up at him even as her gaze flickered uncertainly.

“Show me, my moon,” he whispered, his voice quiet yet pleading, the nickname like a soft caress. “Show me where I hurt you so that I can love you there the most.”

The words were spoken with such raw sincerity, such desperation, that they seemed to wrap around Luna’s heart and squeeze. She released a shaky breath, her eyes fluttering closed as a tear slipped free and traced a path down her cheek.

Her heart— shattered as it was— still managed to beat for him.

It always had.

It always would.

And that scared her more than anything.

“You don’t get to just say that now,” Luna said shakily, her voice cracking as she shook her head, trying to pull away but finding herself unable to. “You don’t get to show up and say everything I’ve been dying to hear after you crushed me.”

Her walls were still up, fragile but standing, and Jeonghan could see her fear, her need to protect herself. But he wasn’t going to let her go. Not this time.

“I told the moon about you, Jiyeonie,” he murmured softly, and the words made her freeze.

Luna let out a broken sob as her head dropped onto his shoulder, her tears soaking into his shirt. Jeonghan didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around her, holding her close as she cried, his hand stroking her back in soothing circles.

“I told the moon about how I wanted to dedicate a song to you after I met you for the first time,” he continued, his voice trembling but unwavering. “I told the moon about how your laugh feels like the answer to every question I didn’t know I was asking. About how you hum to yourself when you think no one is listening, and it’s my favorite sound in the world.”

He gently pulled her head off his shoulder, his hands finding their way to her face again, cupping it as he cradled her, his thumbs brushing away her tears. Her red-rimmed eyes stared into his, her lips trembling as he spoke.

“I told the moon about the way your nose scrunches up when you’re concentrating. About how you never finish a cup of tea but insist on making it anyway because the ritual calms you. I told the moon how you bite your lip when you’re nervous and how it drives me crazy because I want to kiss you every time you do it.”

Luna’s breath hitched, her tears spilling over again as she listened, her heart simultaneously breaking and healing with every word.

“I told the moon about my regrets,” Jeonghan admitted, his voice cracking. “About every time I hurt you, every time I held back because I was too scared to face what I was feeling. I told the moon about how it’s just the hardest thing to love you but not know how. So I spent all my nights in the dark, afraid. Afraid because I tried to forget you, but these things— you— just don’t go away.”

His voice grew softer, more vulnerable. “I hate that you’re so perfect,” he said, his lips curving into the faintest, saddest smile. “So perfect for me… made for me.”

Luna closed her eyes as a fresh wave of tears escaped, her hands coming up to grip his wrists, holding onto him as though she might crumble without the contact.

“The excuses I gave you… none of them mattered,” Jeonghan continued, his voice steadying as he poured his heart out. “Because the truth is, Nana-ya, I love you. I’ve loved you for longer than I can even admit to myself.”

His hands slipped from her face to rest on her shoulders as he leaned closer, his eyes never leaving hers.

“I love you,” he said again, his voice filled with a depth of emotion that made her chest tighten. “I love the way you brighten every room you walk into. I love the way you care for the people around you, how you give so much of yourself even when you have nothing left to give. I love the way you see the world, how you find beauty in places no one else would even think to look.”

He paused, his gaze softening as he added, “I love you, Bae Jiyeon. All of you. The good, the bad, the messy, the beautiful. I love you more than words can ever say, but I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to show you, if you’ll let me.”

Luna’s tears fell freely now, her breath hitching as her hands clutched at his shirt, grounding herself in him. Her walls, the ones she’d fought so hard to keep up, began to crumble, piece by piece, under the weight of his love.

Jeonghan’s voice broke as he continued, his thumb brushing over her cheekbone like he was trying to erase the pain he had caused. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I need you to know the truth. I pushed you away because I thought I wasn’t good enough for you. I thought you deserved someone who wasn’t going to mess up. But the truth is… the thought of losing you terrified me more than anything else.”

Luna’s breath hitched, her voice trembling as she whispered, “And yet, you still let me go.”

Her eyes opened, glistening with unshed tears as she searched his face, her expression filled with a mixture of heartbreak and disbelief.

Jeonghan swallowed hard, shaking his head almost frantically. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking, okay? I thought I was protecting us, but all I did was hurt you. I can’t take that back, but I can promise you that I’ll never make that mistake again.”

She closed her eyes briefly, her shoulders sagging as though the weight of the past months bore down on her all at once. “I’m scared,” she admitted, her voice barely audible. “I spent so much time these past couple of months convincing myself that maybe… maybe we just weren’t meant to be.”

Jeonghan’s heart clenched painfully in his chest, and he stared at her, shaking his head with conviction. His voice was firm, urgent, as if he could will her to believe him. “No. Don’t say that. Don’t you dare say that, Jiyeon-ah. You’re it for me. You’ve always been it for me. I was just too blind to see it in time.”

He reached for her hands, holding them tightly between his own as his voice softened but lost none of its determination. “Please… please don’t give up on us. Let me prove it to you. Let me prove that I’m not going to hurt you again. I’ll do whatever it takes, Jiyeonie. I’ll wait as long as you need. I’ll fight for us, for you, for our friendship. Just… just don’t shut me out.”

Luna’s fingers trembled as they wrapped around his wrist, her grip weak but steadying as she brought his hand down from her face and held it in her lap. Her voice was soft but resolute, her gaze piercing as she finally met his eyes. “You can’t just fix this overnight, Han. We can’t go back to how things were. If we’re going to try again… we need to fix our friendship first. We were friends first. We need to rebuild what broke before anything else.”

Her words hung in the air between them, weighted with truth and the hope of something new. Jeonghan nodded slowly, his lips pressing into a thin line as he absorbed her words.

Despite the desperation in his heart to hold her close and never let go, he knew she was right.

“I know we can’t go back to the way we were,” he said, his voice steady but tinged with emotion. “And I don’t want to go back. I want to move forward— with you. I’ll be better. We’ll be better. I’ll start wherever you need me to. As friends, as strangers— just tell me how to fix this. I’ll do it. I’ll do anything. I’ll earn your trust back, your love, everything. Just… don’t give up on me.”

Luna exhaled a shaky breath, her fingers tightening around his wrist as her gaze softened. “I’m not giving up on you. I never gave up on you. But this time, it’s going to be on my terms.”

Jeonghan’s lips parted, and he nodded without hesitation, his sincerity clear in every word he spoke. “Your terms, always. I’ll wait. I’ll work for it. Just… thank you for giving me the chance to make this right.”

Luna’s lips curved into a faint, tired smile, the tension in her shoulders easing slightly as she spoke, her voice lighter than before, though still tinged with lingering sadness. “Well, the heart wants what it wants.”

Jeonghan’s breath caught in his throat as he stared at her, his expression one of reverence, like she was the moon and the stars shining down on them, lighting his path. “It does. And mine wants you. Always has, always will.”

He spoke the words with such quiet certainty, his gaze never wavering from hers.

In that moment, the air around them felt still, as though the universe itself had paused to bear witness to the weight of their emotions, the unspoken promises lingering in the space between their hearts.

Jeonghan gently pulled away from Luna, the warmth of his touch lingering on her skin. His lips curved into a teasing smile, the kind that used to infuriate her and had always held the power to disarm her. “I can’t wait to tell the little boy,” he said, his tone light and mischievous.

Luna blinked at him, her brows furrowing in confusion. “What little boy?” she asked, her voice laced with equal parts exasperation and bewilderment.

“The little boy fishing on the moon. The man in the moon, remember?” Jeonghan replied, his grin widening as he referenced the conversation they’d had years ago at the Han River during one of their first late-night talks as trainees.

Luna’s jaw slackened slightly before she snapped it shut, shaking her head. “That’s not– He’s not–” She let out a breath, her shoulders sagging in mock defeat. “You’re an idiot.”

Jeonghan laughed softly, the sound rich and familiar, like a song she hadn’t realized she missed. “I know. We’ve been through this,” he said, the humor in his tone softening into affection as he leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

She didn’t move away, didn’t flinch. Instead, her eyes fluttered shut, savoring the moment before she opened them again and met his gaze.

Despite the magnetic pull between them, the kind that had always existed and only seemed stronger now, they both knew the truth.

They couldn’t rush this, not yet.

The more mature parts of themselves— the ones hardened by heartbreak and regret— understood the importance of rebuilding the foundation of their relationship.

Their friendship was the cornerstone of everything they were to each other, and if they wanted to build something lasting, something unshakable, they had to fix what had been broken first.

Neither of them wanted to wait.

They wanted to dive into each other’s arms, to silence the ache with whispered promises and stolen kisses. But they respected the process, respected each other too much to risk repeating their mistakes.

They had taken the first step tonight, had opened the door to healing by airing their frustrations, their fears, and their truths.

Luna had cried until her chest ached, and Jeonghan had been there to hold her. Jeonghan had confessed his regrets, his love, his hopes, and Luna had listened, her presence steady even as her tears fell. They had yelled, voices raised as years of pent-up emotions spilled out, but even in their anger, there had been a yearning to understand.

They were in love.

That much was clear to both of them now.

But love alone wouldn’t be enough if they didn’t have a solid foundation to stand on.

So, Jeonghan promised to work for it, to make it worth it.

Luna promised to trust the process and let him prove himself.

Even so, in the quiet recesses of their hearts, they both knew that it was only a matter of time before the fire between them ignited even more, before the spark that had always been there became impossible to ignore.

It wasn’t a question of if they would cross that line, but when.

And they both felt, deep down, that the moment would come soon.

The universe, it seemed, had been on their side all along.

The anxiety that had drowned Luna earlier in suffocating waves, the restlessness that had driven her to the Han River in search of solace, had carried her back to her island— Jeonghan.

And Jeonghan, who had sought to talk to the moon to share his frustrations and to make sense of the ache in his chest, had found himself drawn by gravity to his moon— Luna.

As they sat there in the stillness of the night, the city lights twinkling like distant stars, Jeonghan reached for her hand once more, and this time, she didn’t hesitate to take it. Their fingers intertwined, and though the path ahead was uncertain, the warmth in their joined hands was a promise.

Together, they would find their way.

They always do.

For the tides, ruled by the moon, carried Luna from the depths to the island of Jeonghan’s soul.

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inseobts · 2 months ago

Text

Fate Won’t Take You From Me

chifuyu matsuno x fem! reader x mitsuya takashi

what if your boyfriend chifuyu knows the future will never be nice to the two of you and he doesn't know how to change it.

a/n: I wrote this when I still had to finish the anime so I hope it's not too bad o(TヘTo)

words count: 4.6k

tags: angst, drama, love triangle(?)

masterlist || ao3 || ko-fi

Chifuyu leans against the wall of the abandoned warehouse, arms crossed, watching as Takemichi rubs his temples like he’s battling the worst headache of his life.

He just got back from another dive into the future, another desperate attempt to fix things before everything spirals out of control. Chifuyu is used to this by now. The frustration, the exhaustion in Takemichi’s eyes.

Takemichi looks uneasy, avoiding his gaze, shifting uncomfortably like he’s keeping a secret.

Chifuyu doesn’t like that.

“So?” he presses, forcing his voice to stay casual “I guess we didn't win yet.”

Takemichi hesitates “It’s… complicated.”

It always is. Chifuyu sighs, running a hand through his hair “Yeah, yeah, it always is. But you know what? I wanna know something else. You know I always try to not ask much but I'm too curious.”

Takemichi finally looks at him “What?”

Chifuyu smirks, trying to lighten the mood, though there’s a weight in his chest that he can’t explain “I never asked before but… What about me and y/n?” he asks, referring to you “Do we… you know… last?”

Takemichi blinks “Last?”

“Yeah. Do we stay together? Are we finally married?”

It’s supposed to be a stupid question. A joke, even. Because of course you do. You and Chifuyu have been through everything together. There’s can't be no version of the future where you aren’t by his side.

Right?

Takemichi’s silence is the first thing that unsettles him. The second is the way his friend suddenly refuses to meet his eyes.

Chifuyu feels something in his stomach twist.

“…Oi,” his voice drops “Why aren’t you saying anything?”

“Chifuyu, I—”

“Just tell me. The worst that can happen is that we gonna change the future.”

Takemichi takes a slow breath, and when he finally speaks, his words shatter Chifuyu’s world.

“In every timeline I’ve seen 'til now… you never marry her.”

The air in Chifuyu’s lungs disappears. It’s like the room is suddenly suffocating, like the walls are caving in around him.

He swallows hard “Then… is she… alive?”

“Yeah, she keeps doing good actually.”

“Then… is she still around? does she marry someone else?”

Takemichi hesitates. But he can’t lie, not about this.

“…Mitsuya.”

For a moment, Chifuyu doesn’t move. He can’t.

His brain refuses to accept the words, refuses to process them.

Mitsuya? Mitsuya?

It has to be a mistake. Takemichi has to be messing with him... but his face tells him everything.

It’s true.

His fingers curl into fists. His heart pounds, a chaotic mix of emotions, shock, denial, fear. But the worst one is the burning, consuming jealousy that claws its way into his chest.

Mitsuya. His friend. The guy he trusts with his life.

And the guy who, in every future that exists, steals you away from him?

Chifuyu forces a laugh, but it comes out weird “Nah… nah, that’s bullshit.”

Takemichi doesn’t say anything.

Chifuyu’s jaw tightens “She loves me.” His voice is sharp now, more desperate than he wants it to be “She’s with me.”

Takemichi finally speaks, and his voice is gentle. Pitying.

“…She’s with you... now.”

Now.

The word slices through Chifuyu like a blade.

Because that means one day, you won’t be.

One day, you’ll wake up and love someone else.

One day, you’ll leave him behind.

His chest tightens painfully, like his heart is being crushed in a vice. He wants to scream, to fight, to tell Takemichi he’s wrong. But he can’t, because deep down, a part of him knows… you’ve always been close to Mitsuya after all.

A part of him knows, if he looks too closely, he’ll start noticing things he never wanted to see.

But he refuses to let that happen. He won’t let fate take you from him. He can’t.

Chifuyu doesn’t sleep that night.

He lies awake, staring at the ceiling, Takemichi’s words replaying in his head like a curse.

“In every timeline I’ve seen… you never marry her.”

“She ends up with Mitsuya.”

He hates it. Hates how it latches onto his brain, poisoning every thought, twisting everything he knows about you. About him.

It’s stupid. You love him. He knows you do. But now, he can’t shake the feeling that one day, that won’t be enough.

The next day, he finds you outside Mitsuya’s sewing room, your back against the wall as you wait for him.

You look up when you see him, eyes bright. His girl. His heart aches just looking at you.

“Chifuyu” you call out, pushing off the wall to meet him “What are you doing here?”

He doesn’t answer immediately. His gaze flickers to the door behind you. Mitsuya’s door.

Something in him snaps.

“What about you?” his voice comes out sharper than he means it to “What are you doing here?”

You blink at him, confused “I told Mitsuya I’d stop by today. He’s fixing up my jacket.”

Of course. Mitsuya.

Chifuyu clenches his jaw, ignoring the way his stomach twists.

“So you just waited out here for him?” he asks, trying to keep his voice casual.

“Yeah?” you frown, tilting your head “Why?”

He knows it’s stupid. He knows he’s being irrational. But now, every second you spend with Mitsuya feels like a countdown.

Like every moment between you two is another step toward the day you wake up and realize you love him instead.

And the worst part? You don’t even know it’s coming. And he doesn't even know when does that exactly happen.

Chifuyu swallows down the jealousy burning in his throat and forces a grin, his usual grin, the one you love.

“I just didn’t know you guys were that close” he says.

You roll your eyes, laughing “Of course we are. He’s my friend.”

Yeah. Friend. Until he’s not.

The door behind you suddenly opens, and Mitsuya steps out, wiping his hands on a rag. He looks up, notices Chifuyu, and nods.

“Yo” Mitsuya greets.

Chifuyu nods back, but there’s something in his chest, something ugly, clawing at him as he watches you smile at him.

Is this what fate looks like?

Mitsuya turns to you, handing you your jacket “Should be good as new now.”

You take it with a grateful smile “Thanks, Mitsuya. You’re the best.”

Chifuyu watches as Mitsuya reaches out to fix the collar of your shirt, a simple, meaningless gesture.

Something inside him breaks, and efore he even thinks, he grabs your wrist.

“Come on” he says, voice tight “We’re leaving.”

You blink at him in surprise “Chifuyu?”

He doesn’t let go. Doesn’t want to let go.

Mitsuya watches him, silent. Calm, as always. But Chifuyu swears he sees something in his eyes, a question.

Chifuyu forces a grin, pulling you closer to him.

“She’s mine, Mitsuya” he says lightly, but there’s an edge to his voice.

Mitsuya doesn’t react, just watches. Like he’s studying him. Like he already knows something’s wrong.

You pull your wrist free, frowning up at him “What’s with you today? That was rude.”

He hates how guilty you sound, like you’ve done something wrong. Like you’re the one hurting him, when it’s fate itself that’s betraying him.

“Nothing” he lies, forcing himself to relax “Let’s just go.”

You hesitate, glancing back at Mitsuya, but eventually sigh and nod “Okay. See you later, Mitsuya.”

“Yeah” Mitsuya says slowly, watching the way Chifuyu keeps you close “See you.”

Chifuyu doesn’t look back as he leads you away, but he knows Mitsuya is still watching, and for the first time, Chifuyu realizes something.

He’s not just fighting fate anymore.

He’s fighting Mitsuya too.

Chifuyu doesn’t let go of your hand until you’re far from Mitsuya’s place. Even then, his grip lingers, fingers still curled around yours like he’s afraid to lose you.

You glance at him, brows furrowed “Okay, seriously. What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing” he says too quickly “Just wanted to spend time with you.”

You give him a look “You could’ve just asked instead of dragging me away like that.”

His stomach twists. You’re not mad, not really, but there’s something in your tone. Something off. Like you’re confused. Like you don’t understand why he’s acting this way.

Because you actually don’t. Because you don’t know what he knows.

He forces a smirk, bumping his shoulder against yours “I just missed my girl, that’s all.”

Your expression softens, but only a little “Still… you were kinda rude to Mitsuya back there.”

His jaw clenches before he can stop it “You always have to defend him like that?”

The moment the words leave his mouth, he wants to take them back.

You blink, surprised “What? Chifuyu, it’s not about defending him, it’s just—”

“Forget it” he cuts you off, shaking his head “Let’s go do something fun.”

You hesitate for a second, then sigh “Fine. But if you keep acting weird, I’m making you tell me what’s up.”

He just smiles, pulling you along, ignoring the tightness in his chest.

He won’t let fate take you from him. No matter what.

Later that night, Chifuyu watches you from across the room as you scroll through your phone. You’re probably texting Hina or some of the other girls, completely unaware of the storm raging inside him.

His mind replays Takemichi’s words over and over again like a nightmare.

“She ends up with Mitsuya.”

His fingers curl into fists. He can’t let that happen. He won’t.

But would Mitsuya even fight for you?

Would he ever try to take you from him?

No. He knows Mitsuya. He knows he’d never do something like that. Mitsuya’s too good. Too loyal.

And that scares him even more. Because if Mitsuya isn’t the one stealing you away…

Then maybe it’s you. Maybe one day, without even realizing it, you’ll start choosing him instead. Maybe it’s already happening.

Chifuyu swallows hard.

He needs to do something. Now.

Mitsuya, on the other hand, notices the change almost immediately.

At first, it’s subtle. Chifuyu standing closer to you, always making sure to keep a hand on your waist or your wrist. The way he interrupts conversations just to pull you away.

It’s small things. Easy to brush off.

Until he realizes Chifuyu never lets you be alone with him anymore.

Until he catches the sharp glances Chifuyu throws his way when you aren’t looking.

Until Chifuyu starts watching, like he’s waiting for something to happen.

Mitsuya doesn’t say anything at first. He just watches back.

Because he’s starting to understand.

Mitsuya leans against his worktable, arms crossed, watching Chifuyu from across the room.

It’s been like this for days now. Chifuyu hovering close to you, keeping you just out of reach. Always watching. Always waiting.

At first, Mitsuya thought he was imagining it. That maybe Chifuyu was just being overprotective, like he always was. But now it’s obvious.

Chifuyu isn’t just protecting you. He’s guarding you from him.

Mitsuya exhales through his nose, standing up straight “Chifuyu”

Chifuyu stiffens but doesn’t look at him “What?”

“You got a problem with me?”

Chifuyu finally meets his gaze. His eyes are sharp, guarded “No.”

Mitsuya tilts his head slightly, studying him “Then why are you acting like you do?”

Chifuyu exhales a short, humorless laugh, shaking his head “You’re imagining things.”

“Am I?” Mitsuya doesn’t let up “Because it seems like you’ve been keeping her away from me.”

Chifuyu’s jaw clenches, but he forces a grin “She’s my girlfriend, Mitsuya. Maybe I just want to spend more time with her.”

Mitsuya doesn’t react “And maybe you’re scared.”

Chifuyu’s whole body tenses.

That’s all the confirmation Mitsuya needs.

Mitsuya takes a slow step forward, his voice calm but firm “You’re not stupid, Chifuyu. You know I’d never do anything to mess with your relationship.”

Chifuyu says nothing.

“But you’re still looking at me like I’m the enemy” Mitsuya continues “Like you’re waiting for me to take her from you.”

Chifuyu exhales sharply, turning away “Drop it, Mitsuya.”

“No” Mitsuya’s voice is steady, unwavering “Because this isn’t about me, is it? It’s about you.”

Chifuyu’s hands curl into fists.

“You’re afraid, aren’t you?” Mitsuya doesn’t let up “You really think she’s gonna leave you”

Chifuyu’s eyes snap to his, burning with frustration “Shut up, Mitsuya.”

Mitsuya holds his gaze “Or maybe...” He pauses, voice softer now, like he’s starting to understand.

“Maybe you really do think I would try steal her from you...”

Something flickers in Chifuyu’s eyes.

A crack.

Mitsuya inhales slowly “…You know something, don’t you?”

Chifuyu doesn’t answer.

Mitsuya watches him for a moment longer, then sighs “If you keep this up, you’ll lose her anyway.”

Chifuyu’s breath catches in his throat.

“Not because of me, or because of fate itself” Mitsuya says simply “But because you won’t let her breathe.”

Chifuyu doesn’t move, doesn’t speak, just stands there. And for the first time, he wonders if Mitsuya is right.

If in his desperate attempt to fight fate… He’s becoming the reason you leave.

Chifuyu’s mood shifts over the next few days. You notice it immediately. His usual smiles are forced, and the protective gestures feel more suffocating than caring. He pulls you closer when you don’t need it, watches you with eyes that don’t just look. They study.

And the worst part? He barely acknowledges it. Like he’s pretending everything’s fine.

You can’t pretend anymore.

This isn’t the Chifuyu you know. The Chifuyu you know was always open with you. Always honest. Always real. But now…

You can feel the distance growing.

It hurts more than you thought it would.

So tonight, you decide to confront him.

You wait until the two of you are alone, until it’s just you and him in the living room, the silence thick and suffocating.

He’s on the couch, his legs stretched out in front of him, a manga in hand, but his mind clearly elsewhere.

You stand in the doorway, arms crossed, your gaze focused on him “Chifuyu.”

He doesn’t look up “Hm?”

You step forward, your heart pounding “Stop acting like this.”

He freezes, the manga slipping from his hand, but he doesn’t look up “What are you talking about?”

You take a deep breath, walking closer to him, every step heavy with the weight of your frustration “You’re being distant. You’re overbearing. You’ve been acting like… like I’m some fragile thing that needs to be kept away from everyone. And you know I don't like it.”

Chifuyu finally looks up, but there’s no understanding in his gaze. Just confusion “I’m just looking out for you.”

You shake your head “That’s not it. It’s more than that.”

He looks down at his hands, then back up at you, the walls around him thickening “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Don’t lie to me, Chifuyu” you step closer, your voice firm but shaking from the emotion rising in your chest “You keep acting jealous... You think I would leave you for someone else?”

His eyes widen, and you can tell you’ve hit a nerve, but he still doesn’t speak.

“You’ve been pushing me away, and I don’t know why. I thought you trusted me, but now…” you take a breath, steadying yourself “Now, I feel like you don’t even know who I am anymore.”

He stands up suddenly, his face a mix of frustration and guilt “I trust you, Y/N! I do! But…”

He trails off, his voice faltering as if he’s trying to find the words to explain the chaos inside his head.

“But what?” you ask quietly.

Chifuyu rubs his forehead, as if trying to calm the storm in his mind “Every time I look at you, I think about what happens next. What if one day, you wake up and you’re not with me anymore?”

You blink, the weight of his words hitting you harder than you expected. His eyes are dark, haunted, like he’s seen something he can’t shake.

“Chifuyu…” you whisper, stepping closer to him, your voice softening “I’m not going anywhere. I'm here...”

He looks up at you, his eyes wide with uncertainty, and for a moment, you see the fear, raw and unfiltered, that he’s been hiding.

“You don’t get it” he mutters, voice breaking slightly “I saw it, Y/N. In the future. In every timeline… you end up with Mitsuya. Not me. You marry him.”

You freeze. The words hit you like a punch to the gut, and you can see the pain in his eyes, the torment he’s been holding in.

“You saw it?” you repeat, your voice shaking now.

“Not me, actually. But it’s the same…” he admits, his voice almost a whisper “No matter what… you end up with him. And it kills me, Y/N. I can’t… I can’t just stand by and watch it happen.”

You take a step back, his confession crashing over you in waves. The room feels like it’s spinning, and for a moment, you don’t know what to say.

But then, you find your voice “Chifuyu…”

You take his hands in yours, forcing him to look at you “Listen to me. I don’t know what you saw or not. But this…” you shake your head, feeling a mix of confusion and compassion “This isn’t about fate. It’s about us. I choose you. Every day, I choose you.”

Chifuyu’s eyes well with unshed tears, his hands trembling slightly as he holds onto you “But what if it’s already decided?”

You gently cup his face, forcing him to meet your eyes “Then we fight it. Together.”

His breath catches, and for the first time in days, he looks at you like you’re the only thing that matters.

“Chifuyu…” you say softly “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. But you need to trust me.”

He nods, his voice breaking as he whispers “I’m sorry, Y/N. I was so scared…”

You smile gently, brushing a strand of hair from his face “I know you were. But you can’t keep pushing me away like this. We’re in this together. Always.”

Chifuyu finally lets out a shaky breath, his shoulders relaxing as he pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly like he’s afraid he might lose you all over again.

“I won’t let you go,” he says, his voice thick with emotion “I promise.”

And for the first time in what feels like forever, Chifuyu feels like maybe he can stop fighting fate and trust that you are his, and no one will take you from him.

It’s a quiet evening when Takemichi arrives back from another dive into the future. He’s been gone for days, and you’ve been trying to distract Chifuyu from the anxiety that’s been weighing on him ever since the last conversation.

When Takemichi walks in, his face is grim.

Chifuyu notices him first. He’s standing in the doorway, his eyes tired and heavy with the burden of knowing too much.

You look up from where you’re sitting on the couch and smile, happy to see Takemichi, but Chifuyu doesn’t share your enthusiasm.

“Back already?” Chifuyu says casually, his tone sharp and protective.

Takemichi hesitates. The last time he revealed something, it only made things worse.

“You… you want to know what happens this time?” Takemichi asks, his eyes shifting nervously between the two of you.

Chifuyu stands up, walking over to where you’re sitting. His hand finds yours, squeezing it gently, but there’s a firmness in his voice as he answers Takemichi.

“No,” Chifuyu says, his voice steady “I don’t need to know. Whatever happens in the future… we’ll handle it.”

Takemichi blinks, surprised by Chifuyu’s refusal. Normally, Chifuyu is the one pushing for answers, the one desperate to fix things, but today… it’s different.

“Chifuyu…” Takemichi starts, but Chifuyu cuts him off, his voice unwavering.

“No, Takemichi,” Chifuyu says, shaking his head “I don’t need to know what happens with me and Y/N. I trust her. I trust us.”

You feel your heart swell, the love and reassurance in Chifuyu’s words more than enough to put you at ease. But then, a part of you know what Takemichi has seen, his face tells everything.

Takemichi swallows hard, looking between you both. He knows the truth. He knows what he’s seen. He knows what’s coming. And yet, he doesn’t want to say it.

Chifuyu’s grip on your hand tightens, but he doesn’t look at you. He doesn’t look at Takemichi. He stares straight ahead, his jaw clenched, eyes narrowing slightly.

“I already know what you saw” Chifuyu replies, his voice calm and controlled, but there’s an edge to it “But I don’t care. This is our timeline. Our future.”

Takemichi’s eyes widen in confusion, not understanding what Chifuyu means. He expected a fight, maybe even an argument, but Chifuyu… Chifuyu’s eyes are clear. His gaze unwavering.

“You’re… you’re not angry?” Takemichi asks, his voice uncertain.

Chifuyu shakes his head slowly. He finally looks at you, his expression softening.

“No” he says simply “I’m not angry. I’m just…”

His voice falters for a moment, but he continues, his words filled with conviction “I’m choosing to believe in you, y/n. In us. And no matter what happens, I’m going to fight for that. For us. If that’s the future, it means that something might have happened and all I want is you to be happy, even if it's not with me.”

You feel a rush of emotions flood over you as you squeeze his hand tighter, the words meaning more to you than anything else. You don’t need the future to define what you have now.

Takemichi watches the exchange between the two of you, his chest tightening. He understands now. Chifuyu is choosing to trust you. He’s not going to let the future dictate his present.

“You really believe that?” Takemichi asks, his voice quiet.

Chifuyu nods firmly “Yeah. I do.”

There’s a long pause, and for a moment, the world feels still. Takemichi is silent, eyes searching Chifuyu’s face, and then, finally, he lets out a breath.

“…Alright.” Takemichi says, his shoulders slumping slightly “Then, I guess that’s all I need to hear.”

You can see the relief in Takemichi’s expression, the weight he’s been carrying lifting slightly as he looks at both of you.

“I’ll make sure this timeline works out for you guys” Takemichi adds with a small smile, stepping toward the door.

Chifuyu watches him go, then turns to face you, his eyes softer than they’ve been in days. He pulls you into a tight hug, his arms wrapping around you as if he’s afraid to ever let go.

“I’m not going anywhere either” you whisper, holding him close.

“I know” Chifuyu replies, his voice steady but filled with warmth “And I’m not letting you go either.”

You smile against his chest, feeling the love and trust between the two of you stronger than anything fate could ever throw your way.

And for the first time in a long time, Chifuyu feels like the future doesn’t matter. Because as long as he has you, nothing else will ever break them apart.

The days after are peaceful. Chifuyu’s trust in you grows stronger with each passing day. He never mentions the future again, never brings up Mitsuya, and his affection for you deepens, he’s focused, determined to make the present his truth.

But something inside you feels weird.

You don’t want to think about it. You don’t want to admit that the future still lingers like a shadow over your relationship. But after everything you’ve heard, after everything Chifuyu has sacrificed to believe in you, you can’t ignore the question that keeps pressing at the back of your mind:

Why do you never end up with Chifuyu in the future?

You’ve tried to push it away. You’ve tried to focus on the present. But the truth is, you can’t stop thinking about it. And deep down, you know you need to get the answer for yourself.

One night, when Chifuyu is busy with work and you find yourself alone, the weight of your curiosity becomes too heavy to ignore.

You slip out quietly, your heart racing as you make your way to Takemichi’s place. The chill of the night air doesn’t even register, all that matters is the unanswered question that’s been haunting you.

When Takemichi opens the door, his face softens at the sight of you.

“Y/N?” he asks, surprised “What’s up?”

“I need to talk to you,” you say quietly, stepping inside. You don’t waste any time “I need to know. Why… Why don’t I end up with Chifuyu in the future?”

Takemichi blinks, clearly taken aback. He hesitates, looking at you with a mix of sympathy and something heavier. Something he doesn’t want to say.

“Y/N…” he begins, his voice soft and hesitant “Are you sure you want to know this?”

You nod, the resolve in your voice stronger than it feels “I need to know, Takemichi. Please. I have to know the truth.”

There’s a long silence as Takemichi looks at you, weighing the decision. He knows how much this will hurt. How much it could change everything. But he can’t keep it from you.

“Alright,” he says finally, his voice low “The reason… the reason you never end up with Chifuyu in the future… it’s always the same.”

You hold your breath.

“It’s because of Chifuyu,” Takemichi continues, his voice thick with regret “He never feels like he’s enough. He loves you so much that he convinces himself you’ll be better off with someone else. He pushes you away… he doesn’t want to be the one holding you back.”

Your heart sinks as you absorb his words. It’s not about Mitsuya. It’s not about you choosing someone else. It’s about Chifuyu, about his own insecurity, his fear of not being good enough for you, of loving you so much that he believes he’s destined to lose you.

“And no matter what happens,” Takemichi continues, voice trembling with empathy “Chifuyu doesn’t fight for you. Not because he doesn’t love you... he loves you more than anything. But because he thinks that’s what’s best for you. He believes you deserve someone who can give you the world, someone who won’t drag you down.”

The words crash over you like a wave, and you feel dizzy, your mind racing.

Chifuyu’s fear of being unworthy is the reason you’re torn apart. He believes his love for you is not enough to keep you.

You take a deep breath, forcing the tears back. You’ve spent so much time trying to make sense of everything, trying to figure out why fate always separates you and Chifuyu.

And now you know.

But knowing doesn’t make it any easier.

You stand there, numb for a long moment before you finally speak, your voice thick with emotion “So… it’s always his choice? He chooses to walk away from me?”

Takemichi nods, his eyes filled with sadness “Yeah. He never thinks he’s good enough for you. That’s the reason, no matter how much he loves you, no matter how hard you try, it always ends the same.”

Your heart aches as you let that sink in. The realization that Chifuyu, the person who loves you more than anything, could be the very reason you can’t stay with him.

You turn to leave, Takemichi’s voice stopping you just before you reach the door.

“Y/N,” he says softly “I’m sorry.”

You nod silently, wiping away a tear that threatens to fall. You need to go back to Chifuyu. To hold him. To remind him that he’s more than enough. You need him to believe in you, in both of you.

But deep inside, you know it won’t be easy. Because it’s never been about love. It’s been about belief.

And for now, you can only hope that, somehow, Chifuyu will find the strength to fight against the very thing that’s pulling him away from you: his own fear.

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gay-dorito-dust · 11 months ago

Note

Heyho, I saw that your wolverine requests are open and would love Logan reuniting with the reader who he was in love with and thought was dead. Instead she was just Stuck in the void for some reason, maybe being besties with Remy and Logans a little jealous? 👀💞

Logan had just about enough of Wade pissing him about, dragging him along with the promises of getting the TVA to fix his timeline, the timeline he has fucked up and lost everyone he cared about, and subsequently made everyone go against the mutants because of his own actions.

He has lost you prior to the massacre at the mansion. You were sent out on a mission, a simple rescue mission that got dicey real quick with the brotherhood of mutants came, and for weeks on end Logan was left on the edge of breaking the longer the silence on your end grew; only for it crescendoed when it it was brought to everyone’s attention that you and the brotherhood were seemingly wiped from existence. No traces of you were left behind and Logan was forced to deal with the thought that you may be dead, never to come home and brighten his day ever again with that sweet smile of yours.

It had hurt him beyond words to hear this news and immediately responded in denial and anger that he later went to the location where you seemingly disappeared, only to come across a piece of fabric caught on a branch, it was yours for your fresh scent was on it, and so in sobering acceptance Logan pocketed the fabric and made his ways down to the pub to drown his sorrows before encountering his second tragedy back at the mansion.

Two tragedies that ended up with Logan losing the most important people in his life and he couldn’t do anything about it, it ate away at him when he was awake and ate even more at him during the night where the screams were at their loudest. Logan didn’t know whether you died screaming but now and then he swore he could hear your screams the loudest amongst them all.

So while he was eyeing the impressive collection of liquor, debating on which one he should down first, he heard a laugh and then a voice so familiar and engrained in his mind it made his eyes water upon hearing it.

‘Remy i did not steal your bo staff, that is such a ridiculous statement, you probably left it somewhere you can’t remember.’

‘If not you mon Amie then who? Last I recall you wanted revenge against me for a harmless little prank.’

Logan heard you sigh. ‘Harmless is one way to put it but I swear I did not touch your bo staff!’

‘That’s what someone who takes other people’s bo staffs would say.’ Remy replied playfully as you both came into Logan’s view. His eyes were quick to focus on the way Remy’s arm was slung over your shoulder oh so casually as jealously began to brew within his chest. You were both too close for Logan’s liking and he’d have half a mind to walk over and slice Remy’s arm clean off, but unfortunately for the time being he had to show restraint.

Logan could only watch as your laughter subsided and disappeared when your eyes locked onto his. ‘Logan.’ You said his name breathlessly. ‘Logan it’s me!’ You cried as you were quick to push yourself away from Remy’s side as you walked towards him with hope in your eyes. Logan felt his walls crumbling down and the raging jealousy subside as he greeted you halfway, bringing you into his arms tightly as he buried his face deep into your neck.

‘I know it’s you dumbass. There’s no one else quite like you here.’ He said softly as he breaths you in, trying his hardest not to break down right then and there, and telling himself repeatedly that this wasn’t a dream like the ones he had countless times before; You were here in his arms and smelling as sweet as the day you left on that mission. ‘I thought you were dead.’ He adds softly just for you to hear and you couldn’t help but feel your heart break for the amount of hurt Logan must’ve went through thinking that you were dead.

‘I thought I was too.’ You admitted to him as you burrowed your face into his chest, having been missing him dearly since the moment you were brought to the void lost and with no way home to him, you could only imagine what he must’ve been thinking back home that it brought you to tears that day. You knew of Logan’s past and knew how deeply he loved and how deeply he could be hurt, you promised him that you wouldn’t be amongst the people he lost, but it seemed as though the TVA had differing opinions on that and pruned you on the day of the mission.

‘What happened on that mission.’ Logan asked.

‘Everything was going fine, up until these weird people in uniforms- the TVA- that came out of those orange door like portals and pruned all of us.’ You explained as best as you could but even now you still didn’t understand why. However after some time spent in the void you had grown past the point of caring about the reason behind it and just wanted to go home, but most importantly go back home to Logan.

‘Why?’ Logan growled, finding himself hating the TVA even more than he did previously knowing that they had a hand in your disappearance, and even had the audacity to lie and tell him straight to his face that you were dead, not trapped in the void but dead. ‘What gives them the right.’ He adds as he tightens his hold on you, hoping that it would keep you safe for he wasn’t planning on loosing you a second time. You sounded so scared and he fucking hated knowing that you were on your own here for so long, scared and afraid of the unknown of the void.

‘I don’t know Logan.’ You told him honestly, not caring whether or not people saw you break down, ‘I was so fucking scared that I tried calling out for you in hopes that you’d hear me…but you weren’t there…I was so scared that I was going to die here.’ If Logan wasn’t already protective of you before, then he was even more protective of you if that was possible to begin with as he pressed reassuring kisses against your forehead. ‘It’s okay, I’m here now, you’re not alone anymore not ever again will you be alone.’ He promised you as he hugged you tighter against his chest in hopes of bringing you comfort with his warmth.

‘I’m so fucking glad you’re okay.’ You told him, pulling back to press your forehead against his own, smiling softly when you felt him push his head against yours.

‘I’m just as fucking glad to see you’re okay too sweetheart.’ Logan replied as he felt comfortable enough to close his eyes, finding it easier to breathe and relax within your presence as he drank you in.

The reunion between you two was sweet as it was comforting knowing that the other way okay, but then Remy opened his mouth. ‘ you must be the Logan they’ve talked so highly about.’ He said with a smile, happy to see you reunited with a loved one.

‘Who’s this.’ Logan asked you with a sense of hostility as you held his face within your hands so that he wouldn’t be able to look elsewhere but you. ‘Remy. He’s just a friend I made here and an occasional pain in my ass, nothing more.’ You reassured him as you stroked his cheeks in hopes of calming him down.

‘I can assure you that their heart is more than taken by you.’ Remy interjects as you glare at him to shut up, only for him to smirk and shrug his shoulders before deciding to grant you both some privacy. ‘Just don’t do anything carnal or nasty anywhere near my liquor yeah?’ He adds without shame as you glared daggers into his back, by the gods he can be so embarrassing sometimes.

‘I’m so sorry about him.’ You told Logan but he was too busy admiring your lips.

‘Is what he said true?’ He asks softly.

‘Yes.’ You admitted, ‘but it’s not like you like me I mean what about jea-‘ before you could finish your sentence Logan was quick to shut you up with a impassioned kiss that almost knocked you back, but you were just as eager to reciprocate the kiss tenfold as your hands ran up and into his hair, giving it a sharp tug now and then as Logan would retaliate with a low growl and biting your bottom lip.

‘Are you going to fuck now? If you are should I leave or?’ Wade asked and Logan was reminded of the most obvious and annoying person alive and pulled away to glare at him. ‘Fuck off.’

‘Okay.’ Wade said and was immediately out of the room as fast as he could.

‘Where were we?’ Logan asked once he looked back at you with a soft smile as you drew him back into a soft, warm kiss, your soul singing happily as you reunited with the man you loved the most.

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that-weird-thing-in-the-woods · 2 months ago

Text

~{Heyyyyy, So I was reminded This Posts existence so now I’m making everyone’s problem :)}~

•High Queen•

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~

There was an emergency meeting called by John Constantine.

And as all in attendance arrived [Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, Green Arrow, Green Lantern, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter] but there was one very noticeable absence, The Flash but before the hero’s could start asking what this meeting is about and asking where The Flash is.

Constantine pulled out a scroll from his trenchcoat, The scroll looked to be very old and had a gold, purple green wax seal on it that is already broken and he starts read it out loud for the everyone in the room to hear.

“I, The Ancient Of Time will be imprisoning The Flash for his involvement of disturbing the timeline.”

And as the room starts ask questions like “Who is the Ancient of time?” And “How can we get him back?”. And Constantine starts talking and saying that the Ancients are the Gods of Gods and very powerful beings and gaining the attention of one is very bad news and unfortunately for Flash he gained the attention of one of the most powerful of these beings, The Ancient of Time or Clockwork or his first name Kronos (Wonder Woman sucks in a sharp breath at the name)

And the only way to get Flash back from The Ancient of time is to convince the other ancients who are

The Ancient Of Hope

The Ancient Of Healing

The Ancient Of Wishing

The Ancient Of Fear

And the two most powerful beings to ever exist and the hardest to convince

The High Queen and The Ghost King.

And with Clockwork doing whoever knows what to Flash, they need to do this fast and with the JLD out getting all of the materials needed for an audience with the Ancients all they could do know is wait and plan.

Let’s get to planning.

-•—••••••••••••••••—•-

•Background•

The G.I.W are either the dumbest or the most confident humans Pariah Dark has ever heard of.

They had taken the Cores of at least 20 of the ghost of the realm and put them all in a device called a “Nuke” and had fired it into the Zone in an attempt to destroy it but the Zone as it has done before it throw it back at the G.I.W and ended up destroying all that world in the process.

But young Danny, as he had been a halfa all the blast had done to him was Fully-End him and knocked him unconscious in a random area of the Zone, but luckily for him he was transported very close to Clockwork’s tower [Aka his lair] and Clockwork grabbed him and took him back to the Keep but as his job as the Ancient Of Time clockwork himself was unable to take care of Danny himself he needed someone who could.

And as clockwork had the right things to help undo the Madness of the king, he opened up the sarcophagus [Aka the Nap Time Box™️] fixed Pariah Dark mind and dragged him to the keep and told him to look after and care for Danny before going back to his tower and Pariah Dark did just that.

I mean what else was he to do when he was taken out of that box, had his mind fixed and told to care for a hurt ghostling that he had fought before.

During the time Pariah dark was taking care of him the first time Danny woke up he was very concerned about pariah dark being so close to him while he was weak but pariah just explained that he was just helping Danny and don’t he dare try anything.

And over this time Danny and Pariah Dark formed a Father-Child bond with each other and everything was fine.

Until the Observers started to lose their shit over having Pariah Dark as a king again and what to do with Danny and for the most part they wanted to put Danny in the nap time box but of course Pariah Dark said hell no to that and it was actually becoming a problem.

Until Clockwork gave a compromise that the Observers couldn’t disagree with, Make Danny the Queen and it solve all their problems. In private Clockwork explained that with Danny as the Queen the Observers couldn’t hurt him without the entirety of the Zone losing their shit over it and Danny would be safe as well as the Observers couldn’t be able to turn Pariah Dark into a puppet king for them to use and Pariah Dark and Danny both accepted this.

And now Danny is the queen.

-•—••••••••••••••••—•-

•Little Facts•

•Hope is pandora, Healing is frostbite, Wishing is Desiree, Fear is Fright Knight.

•Danny has attendances who are two twin girls named Haru and Mizuki, they died due to illness a few decades ago and have been taking care of the keep as they used to work for a lord so that’s what their used too. Pariah Dark gave them to Danny to help him as he is still not full healed yet and with hundreds of years of paperwork to get to he can’t take care of Danny 24/7 like he would like too but now he has to fight with Haru and Mizuki any time he wants to spend time with Danny and this mostly happens like this ⬇️

•Pariah Dark holding Danny in his arm while looking down on Haru and Mitzuki who are yelling at him to “PUT OUR LADY DOWN” and calling him an “ BARBARIAN” while hitting his legs.

•IF I SEE ANYONE SHIP DANNY AND PARIAH DARK I WILL BLOCK YOU AND YOUR SCREEN WILL NOT SAVE YOU, THAT IS A CHILD AND A HUNDRED YEAR OLD MAN.

•Danny finds the girls and Pariah Dark relationship very funny and will just watch from wherever he is flouting/siting [most likely in Pariah Darks arms].

•Pariah Dark likes to carry Danny around and when he’s not Danny is flouting.

•The girls like to dress Danny up.

•Danny looks to be 15-16, :) Dc X Dp fandom you know what to do

-•—••••••••••••••••—•-

•Appearances•

Danny’s Appearance

Danny usually just wears this because still his injury’s don’t really like heavier clothes for long periods of time but if he needs to he wears this!

Just change the hair to white and the red to blue and that’s him!

Haru’s Appearance

•Haru is the more unhinged one, she absolutely hates anyone who isn’t Danny or her sister like she will throw a man if they get too close for her liking

•Haru has a knife hidden in her kimono and is more one on one fight

•Haru’s kimono is a very muted with blue silver accents

Mitzuki’s Appearance

Mitzuki is as unhinged as her sister but she hides it a bit better, She also hates people but instead of threatening them like Haru is will give backhanded compliments.

•Mitzuki fights with poisons rather than weapons

•Mitzuki’s kimono is a very muted red with gold accents

~{And that’s it! Can you tell at the end of the background I got tired lol anyway hope you crows enjoy this until next time I decide to make my existence your problem, Byeeeeee}~

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misguidedasgardian · 4 months ago

Text

AMOR VINCIT OMNIA III

III. Starving

MASTERLIST

Summary: The reality of your marriage finally hits you

Warnings: Use of she/her pronouns, reader has hair, Ancient Rome AU accuracies and inaccuracies, arranged marriages, age difference (Marcus is late forties reader is 20), cursing, reader is touch starved (to some capacity), use of historic characters that don’t belong on this timeline, and other sort of inaccuracies (i'm not an historian), MIGHT MISS SOME WARNINGS

Notes: I have to admit I have trouble calling Acacius, Marcus, but now its a reader thing 😂

This story is placed 10 years BEFORE gladiator II, so that’ll make Lucilla 39, Reader is 20, Marcus idk, Lucius (reader's bro) would be 18 if he was here.

This fic is based out of @stylesispunk's "Soldier in the armour" 💕

When you woke up, your eyes ached, as you cried yourself to sleep, your scalp still hurt and your hair was wild as you had to undo the intricate braids yourself.

You sat on the bed and you looked down to see the beautiful sheer tunic, and you felt more of what you felt last night… Was it shame? you didn’t know as you felt like you had done something wrong, your own husband didn’t want to bed you, on your wedding night, after waiting six months

Tears spring to your eyes again,

Everybody had claimed you looked beautiful last night, even Marcus said so himself… perhaps, he was truly tired… but the way he spoke to you… you felt something definitive in his words.

“I will not touch you”

Did he mean… for last night? or…?

Perhaps you had done something wrong…

And now you were spiraling. The door opened and two maids came inside, they didn’t look at you they just bowed and presented themselves

“I am Diana, domina”

“and I’m Tullia”

“Good morning”, you greeted, covering yourself with the sheets

“Do you need anything, domina?”, asked the one that seemed eldest, she looked at you and got all embarrassed, you guessed the state of your figure was worse that you believed

“I think I need someone to braid my hair”, you said shakily, “and I’d like one of my tunics from the big trunk… please”, they both nodded quickly and they as much ran to fulfill your requests. Tullia came back with a comb in her hands. You rose from the bed feeling a bit self conscious as you were as good as naked, but they didn’t seem to mind

She braided your hair carefully, and smiled softly at you, Diana came back with one of your most beautiful tunics, in your favorite colour.

“Is Marcus awaken?”, you asked Tullia

“Yes domina, for a couple of hours now”, she mumbled, and you cursed yourself, what would he think of you? sleeping in your very first day as a married couple

“You look so pretty domina”, offered Diana, she seemed like a sweet girl, you guessed she was the same age as you

“Thank you, and thank you for helping me”, you said softly

“The General is in the triclinium, eating”, one informed you, and you were quick to find your way to him after thanking them once more.

You took long breaths to soothe yourself, and then, as you were about to show yourself to him in the triclinium, you put on your softest smile and walked in his line of view.

He put on a soft red tunic, and when he saw you, he stood from the long chair

“Good morning”, he greeted.

“Marcus”, you offered, “sorry for sleeping so much…”, he shook his head

“There is no need for that”, he said, “I hope your night was pleasant”, yeah, very, you thought sarcastically, “and you are rested”

“I am rested”, you said, and you hoped your eyes weren’t red.

“Do you want something to eat?”, he offered, and he seemed… relaxed, on the contrary of last night.

You wanted to ask him about last night, about what happened, about what you did wrong, so you could fix it. But now, even if he was in front of you, he seemed so distant, so foreign, the little trust you had developed seemed like it evaporated

“Sure”, you said, your mouth was dry and you guessed it was because you cried all the water inside your body

“Was the temperature pleasant? Were you cold?”, he asked, you were cold, and not in the way he thought.

“It was fine”, you said simply, it was drier and colder than in your villa, the sun didn’t hit Marcus’ home as much, but still.

Should you ask him why he didn’t bed you?

The very thought mortified you. Perhaps he was truly tired, perhaps it was just a one time thing, perhaps today or tonight…

But he didn’t

You ate in silence and then he left, he muttered how he needed to “take care of something” and left you alone in his house.

You didn't understand what he possibly needed to do the morning after he got married, so perhaps it was your fault he didn’t bed you, perhaps he realized being in your presence was intolerable… perhaps

You felt that awful feeling in your chest again, a pang of pain… you’d realize that was the feeling of shame, and a bruised ego.

When he returned, it was late at night, you couldn’t possibly know where he had been, you grew tired of waiting for him, walking the passages of the vill like a ghost, the sweet maids gave you food, and showed you around, but still.

The villa was beautiful and big, it felt a bit empty, as Acacius barely lived here, but it could be so much more, and as he had said, you could make decisions over it now, as his wife, and you were looking forward to making it more cozy for you both. Maybe even for your family.

But well, now you remembered that if he didn’t bed you, you were never going to have a family

The night had fallen over Rome and the villa was lit by torches when you decided to take a bath, both Tullia and Diana helped you fill it, and then gave you essences, and then you dismissed them, as the hour was growing late.

“You gazed upon the room, and the rest of the villa you could see from the bath, it was opposite of the room you slept in last night. You could see part of the hallway that led to your room, and… you now wondered where Marcus’ room was.

You leaned back against the edge of the bath, enjoying the warmth and the tiled surface, when you heard footsteps on the hallway. And when you opened your eyes, Marcus’ was there, he stopped in the threshold, and he was looking at you wide-eyed

You just realised your breasts were peaking out of the water, and you barely had any modesty behind the water darkened by the essences you had put on.

“Marcus”, you mumbled, covering your breasts and hiding in the water to the neck. But as he stood there, watching you, a tingle of something unknown trickled down your spine. Perhaps like this you could… entice him.

You would have been mortified before, but now… he was your husband, was he not? He did want to marry you, right? Besides, you were so used to being naked in front of other people, even if they were your villa’s maids.

But you didn't think about it anymore, you uncovered your breasts, and sat back.

He seemed to get out of his stupor, and looked up at your face

“I wanted to see if you were asleep”, he said, his voice plain, he seemed to regain his composure, standing very still like he did last night.

“I wanted to take a bath”, you said softly, “would my husband care to join me?”, you asked, but you didn’t sound like the temptress you pretended to be, your voice came out all shaky, and doubtful.

“I’m sorry to disturb you”, he said, and you felt like the water froze around you, “don’t you worry, I’ll take a bath in the morning”, you just stared at him, speaking, apologising, making excuses, but no words could truly soothe the aching pain that seemed to be growing in your insides.

“Good night”, he whispered, and then he left you, in cold water.

You had to cover your mouth to stifle the whimper that you couldn’t help.

It had to be you, right? it had to be

What was so wrong with you? that your husband would prefer to run in the opposite direction after gazing upon your naked form?

You wanted to say it got better, but it didn’t, you saw him a bit in the mornings and when the sun went down to eat together, he disappeared for most part of the day, sometimes he would hide in his office to attend to matters of his states or his household.

He would speak to you about the day, in a very superficial manner, he would ask you for your wellbeing, and he would not give you any space to talk into deeper levels of intimacy or for you to get close to him.

You found him barely looking at you, your hands barely touching if you both wanted to grab the same thing at the same time, and when they met? he would pull it back quickly as it was on fire

What was wrong with you?

Shouldn’t a husband hold his wife? should touch her, kiss her? you had seen it many times, even a gentle grabbing of hands… but he won’t even come close to you.

Is this how it was going to be?

The guilt started biting at your heels. You felt like you had a snake’s teeth sunk into your bosom, its body constricting around you, making you feel small, undesirable, unwanted, and you wouldn’t wish this feeling even to your worst enemy.

You were in Marcus’ study (he had allowed you to read his scrolls if you wished), reading a scroll of pre-Roman Alexandria, when Diana showed up.

“There is a man here to see you Domina”, she muttered, her cheeks were rosy with embarrassment

“Who?”, you asked, raising your gaze from the yellow parchment

“He said his name was Lucius”, she said with wide eyes. You stood up at once, and with quick steps you arrived at the Vestibule so quick it made your head spin.

He was standing there, watching the clay made faces decorating the walls. He was as handsome as when you saw him last, the day of your betrothal

“Lucius”, you called, “what are you doing here?”

“You look beautiful”, he said right at the start, you felt your cheek heating.

“Have you come to see my husband?”, you asked

“No”, he said quickly, his gaze wasn’t the same one he used to dedicate to you, his eyes were now cold, even calculating, and it gave you chills, as you believed you were the guilty one of that ever happening, “I came to see you”, he said

“Lucius…”

“Is not what you think”, he said then as he was bored

“Marcus might return any minute it is not proper for me to see you, alone”, you said curtly

“Marcus is not going to come any time soon”, he said, “he is at my father’s villa”, you frowned when you heard him.

“What could he possibly be doing at your villa?”, you asked him

“He was with your mother too”, he said, he seemed to be relishing on the fact that he knew… something… paladating the news like one would a ripe fruit

“To do what?”, you insisted, tired already of his dramatic pauses

“Marcus became your paterfamilias”, he explained, “that includes your mother, as he is your husband, the oldest male in your family”

“Yes… so?”, you asked him

“They were there discussing a marriage proposal”, you actually felt cold sweat dripping down your back

“Between who?”, you asked

“Your mother and my father”, he said firmly

“WHAT?”, you couldn’t believe what you were hearing

“So now I understand why your mother wouldn’t even hear of my father’s proposal for us both”, he said bitterly

“I don’t understand”, you whispered brokenly, “Do they… love each other?”, you asked, he chuckled darkly

“My father loves power, yours must love money”, he said darkly

“Lucius”, you called

“They both betrayed us”, he said, frowning, “they denied us our happiness so they can have theirs”

“I don’t think that’s true”, you said, but you didn't even believe it yourself, “there must be something else in it”

“Why didn’t she marry Acacius then?”, he said, “everyone in Rome know how close they are ever since the emperor Commodus died, and everyone was surprised when they never married”

“She didn’t marry him because she did not love him, and because Acacius asked her for my hand instead”, you explained simply, he laughed, it was a bitter and dry laugh, it made your skin prickle.

“So she loves my father?”, he asked, you didn’t know what to answer. Never had you seen your mother talking to any men that weren't Acacius or one of the old turtles of the Senate, nor has she spoken to you about anyone else.

“I… I don’t know”, you answered truthfully, “you haven’t seen anything odd?”, you asked him.

“I haven’t, no… never seen your mother in my villa before, and neither does my father has visited your mother”. he said

“So it is a marriage for convenience”, you concluded

“it must be”, he said firmly, “so the question is… if it is, why didn’t they let us marry instead?”, he asked, “your mother can’t give my father any children… I don’t think”

“Maybe she can”, you said sadly. If your mother actually marries and manages to get pregnant before you… you’d not know what to do with that.

Your mother’s reason for you NOT to marry Lucius was that he might use you, for his benefit, your name, your lineage, and you understood that, so then she goes and marries his father? That was so odd. Because if it wasn’t out of love but convenience, why didn’t she let you marry Lucius instead? that had a chance of becoming love? Was Marcus’ request bigger than your happiness?

Lucius’ eyes landed on you, seemed to look you up and down your form, he ended up in your face.

“You are miserable”, he admired

“I’ve only been married ten days”, you said back

“Still”, he whispered, “does he not treat you well?”, he asked. You wanted to answer that he didn’t ‘treat’ you at all

“He is kind”, you said shortly

“You deserve more”, he said, “you deserve someone who can give you the world”

“He will… someday”, you said, but you didn’t even believe it.

After Lucius left, you were left alone, with your stomach twisted in knots, but for better or worse, Marcus came early today, and he brought your mother with him.

And in a normal day, you would have been happy to see your mother, but not today, as Lucius’ visit still lingered in your mind, you placed a smile on your face nonetheless as they approached you at the triclinium.

She smiled when she saw you, her eyes searching your form and you weren’t sure for what, but she cradled your face in her hands and kissed your cheek

“You look radiant”, she said, pleased, “married life suits you”, and you felt like you could laugh, bitterly, but laugh at least. When you looked at the mirror this morning you thought you had never looked so sad

Marcus barely looked at you, he looked positively displeased, but you saw his intent to fake it, at least he would give you this courtesy

“I invited your mother, I thought you would like to see her”, he said with a low voice

Should you tell them that you know? That you know of them meeting with Lucius’ father?

Your mother always had this air of secrecy about her, always so mysterious in the way she looked, the way she spoke to people, the way she would keep you both at your home, there was always something, and the same was happening now, only that she brought your husband in tow with her. Now she looked like the cat that ate the mouse, like she had gotten away with something, and you could only guess what, for what Lucius told you.

She stayed for dinner, and you felt like it was that time again, the time Marcus had come to your house to talk to you about marriage, they talked among themselves, not to you, and it's not like you wanted to talk anyways.

“...my love?”, you finally snapped out of your stupor, raising your gaze to your mother, who was looking at you expectantly

“Sorry I wasn’t paying attention”, you muttered, and Marcus was looking at you too

“I was asking, when are you going to make me a grandmother?”, she asked, oh how you wished you could drown yourself in the impluvium

“Maybe you’ll make me a big sister first”, you said. And you couldn’t believe that came out of your mouth. For the first time, you saw her surprised

“What do you mean?”, she asked

“Lucius came to see me”, you said, and Marcus was about to say something, but you didn’t let him, “he told me, what you two were doing in his villa, with his father”

“Darling…”, she reached for you, but you stood from the long chair

“I do not wish to discuss this mother”, you muttered, no matter how long and hard you thought about it, you couldn’t find a reason why your mother did what she did, “what is done is done, I hope you two are happy together”, you said, “and for the grandchildren… you’ll have to ask Marcus”, you said with a fake smile. And the air turned bitter in a second, as both were rendered speechless, so you turned on your heel and left them sitting there, sharing guilty looks.

Very tame chapter, I know, but a needed a "link" chapter between the wedding and the big chapter that's coming! hopefully saturday! I'm really excited for that one! muahaha

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taglist! @orcasoul @peelieblue @raynetargaryan2 @thereallchristine @sesdeuxyeux @melsunshine @thelastemzy @vjuvbbjugv

#misguidedamor #ancient rome au #gladiator fanfiction #marcus acacius fanfiction #general marcus acacius #marcus acacius x reader #angst

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