#i could talk forever about the dialogue and the writing in severance

[aidenwaites]

GOD severance is so good and SO clever with just completely recontextualizing a character in one fell swoop. Natalie going from this mysterious, intimidating mouthpiece of the board to someone who might very well be very, very trapped in one statement during the exchange with the blackface Kier paintings. In one episode, suddenly Mark's endless grief for gemma was visible and tangible and the whole premise of the show is stronger than its ever been. One scene, very few lines of dialogue, and the Gemma/Devon/Ricken/Mark friend circle is understandable and tight-knit and natural- every relationship involved suddenly clicks the way it should. One scene with Dylan's outie and his entire character felt like it had been filled in. One episode on Harmony Cobel and suddenly she's not crazy, she's not acting as bizarrely as it seemed, she's a scientist and a deeply traumatized little girl and a very scorned woman who has never had control over her life or her work. It all just clicks.

[numberonetrashwitch]

Some observations about Baldurs Gate 3 that hit too close to home.

After another few runs i will probably just make an in-Depth Character Analysis for every character simply because they are good reflections of actual trauma-manifestations and how abuse can manifest in people. They are also so well written that it serves a narrative purpose to explore all the material that is out there about them. I am also personally cursed with actual medically-relevant levels of Empathy and Hyperfixation; so writing this helps me put a pin in it and move on.

But so far here are my highlights

(SPOILERS and obviously content warning bc these are deep)

before you ask; i have almost 300h in this game.

You have to convince Shadowheart to eat the Noblestalk. She actually stells you she rather get her memories back from Shar but when you hit the persuasion or intimidation (what the fuck) check to get her to eat it she'll tell you about her childhood friend. Not her name, not her parents but her best firend. Possibly because she has had a closer bond to that person after being abducted and indoctrinated. With her believing herself to be an orphan, she would've looked elsewhere for comfort and sought out her own family, this is why she falls hard and heavy for Shar and builds the backbone of her indoctrination. She is literally ripped out of her home & given a new identity to server her from all she has known. Religious indoctrination, Gaslighting, Abduction, being forced to let go of your personality are her main themes.

There is a scene out there floating around in which you see Astarions pespective of the night when he bites Tav for the first time, in his meditations he is confronted with the rules Cazador put on him, including that he can't eat intelligent creatures, can't be away from Cazador unless allowed to, has to obey every command and that they are should know that they are property. Which in turn means that Astarion literally didn't just have any autonomy, he was objectified (and not just through seductive/sexual measures) and that is really the crux to understanding why he doesn't believe in kindness, but rather shows self-serving behavior in most cases. Since we know that Astarion was extremely young for an elf before he died and became immortal (literally stopping the aging /maturing process) it is also very telling that Cazador constantly calls him brat, boy or other very juvanile names, refering to them as a family... well it is also the story of a very controlling parent. Themes of (Bodily) autonomy, infantilization ( & puer aeternus, forever-child), slavery, depersonalisation, corruption of life and torture to break someone.

Gale isn't just a guy hung up on his Ex, but also a victim of abuse. In this case a power imbalance none of us can fathom; She is described as being a jealous goddess and rules over the domain of mysteries and magic. So with Gale being a Wizard, she is literally his boss. He admits that he was foolish enough to aspire to be an equal to her, but she is so jealous that she tells him he can't really be worthy as long as he takes breath. She could just take his powers away and be done with it, that would be more than enough punishment for a guy who literally made Mystra and her domain his life's purpose, but she rather makes him do it himself. Add to that, that she literally only tells him this after years of self-isolation (after he put down so many wards that he could've blown up a whole army as he says if you click the right dialogue) to really fuck him up well. He also talks about death pretty much constantly, not surprising giving your situation, but he will tell you that he will kill himself at several points in the game, for instance after he comes clear about his nethrese orb. Themes of romantic abuse, power-imbalance, toxic work enviorment, self-isolating behavior, suicidal ideation

Wyll ... well from the looks of it he is the most well adjusted of all the companions (my opinion) but he has something that i'd describe as the "eldest daughter"-syndrome, more commonly known as parentification. This pattern usually occurs within single-household parents and is commonly described as a parent looking to their child for emotional or practical support, rather than providing it to their kid. We meet Ulder and see that he talks over Wyll a lot, not listening but expecting him to follow the standard he sets for him. That is also why Wyll repeats his fathers words like gospel (because this is what, in his mind, fullfills the expectations bestowed upon him) and why he loves fairytales / bard tales so much (because they are an ecapist view of the job he set out to do) Ulder literally exiled his teenage son because Wyll did the only thing he could to save an entire city, by sacrificing himself. Thats a lot to expect from a 17 year old - even more so, he doesn't stop with the heroics. He expects himself, as a human who hasn't even reached the age of 30 to hold up to mystical creatures such as Astarion or Karlach, or even Gale who is a accomplished Wizard. Themes of parentification, escapism, self-harming through putting himself in danger, chronic-self-sacrifice

In plain words; Gortash, Karlach's Idol sold her to a Devil. But add to that that she must have been pretty young when she was sold (late teens to early twenties possibly) and being that if you play as a Tiefling, you face a lot of predjudice she was likely forced into that position as well. Starstruck she was, with a juvenile naitivy that Gortash used. Appropriately, as he is the chosen of Bane the god of "tyrannical oppression, terror, and hate, known across Faerûn as the face of pure evil through malevolent despotism" (Source: Forgotten-Realms Wiki / Bane) So she pretty much was raised in a toxic enviorment, which forced her to become a killing-machine, first figuretively, then with the extraction of her heart, literally. Themes of slavery, oppression, misuse of trust, being taken advantage by a more powerful/older(?) person, being drafted.

Jaheira - to be honest, you need to know the lore of the previous baldurs gate games or just listen to her dialouge, ask her all the questions. She is a war-veteran against Bhaal, the good of ritual murder, and has a long history of fighting to achieve some sort of balance of power. She lost her husband and several close people all to this, or any other war, but due to her wisdom and strength people look to her for guidance. Themes of: Survivors Guilt.

Halsin - he is really closed off at first but then just casually hits you with "i was captured in the underdark and spent 3 years chained to a bedroom wall by a pair of drows who used me as they pleased". He is reprimanded by some of his druids for leaving the grove as soon as opportunity struck, just to get back and leave the next day, and if you talk to him about his position in the grove he is actually very forthcomming. He actively holds himself back; indulging in simple hobbies because he knows what lies within his heart. He is afraid of himself and his potential (canonnically he can't control his wildshape, which is very weird for an ARCH-druid) Themes of: impostor syndrome, avoidant-based self-harm, sexual opression, loss of control, emotional regulation.

Lae'zel is a very tragic case, and one that closely resembles the stories of Shadowheart and Karlach. Her entire existence is based upon a matriachial war society allowing her to live if she proves she can be of use and that in a culture which only values brutality, dominance & service. All of that culimating in her finding out that her oh-so-beloved Queen is actually just an imposter, and that everything she has lived for up to that point is merely political propaganda created to make her, and the rest of her entire species, willing pawns in a war that has no longer bearing on their survival alone, but is fought to justify Vlaakith's (the reigning monarchs) personal ambitions. Not only is she forced to reconcile that she is turned into the thing that controlled her kind for hundreds of years, that the only cure she knows of would kill her and then on top of that, that her hopes and dreams were lies and that she is now the Nr 1 enemy of the person she has served with all her being. themes of: oppression, propaganda, casual violence, objectification, child-warfare, eternal warfare

Minthara in short, her story is about being shamed for growing up in the same scenario that Lae'zel grew up in. Lolth, the god of the Lolth-sworn drows is a crazy queen who values scheming & backstabbing so much and is so volatile that you can't know what to expect of your deeds (and i mean it; there were people who were appraised by her for scheming against her, but also those who were killed. It's almost random.) She considers Lolth to be cruel and abandoned her for the Absolute, only to then be used and abused the same way Lae'zel has. Not with promises, but erasing her memory and exposing her perceived weakness. Themes of: casual violence, violent culture, her own ambition colliding with her desire to be safe, being a pawn in a larger game.

[zluckychap]

"dunk tank" behind the scenes

part 2: the writing & art

can't start drawing the comic without thumbnails!

anyway

i started writing this thing in february at the same time as For Science Part 2. this comic was originally going to be called For Science Part 3, since it has the same 4th-wall-breaking elements as that series. but navi’s not in it, and it’s not really a continuation of 1 and 2, so i wanted to think of something else (cont)

i was gonna call it “the big update” or something based on whatever the update name turned out to be (at the time i didn’t know it was called “worth the wait”) but both of those still seemed too on-the-nose.

but then, the thoughts of the fandom being so entertained by painter’s demise got me envisioning the poor guy stuck in a carnival dunk tank, forever suffering by our hands in our unending quest for video game completion. how morbid is that

the way we so casually talk about his upcoming demise is in a way that would freak anyone out if it was about THEIR death. we talk about it so innocently and it's arguably creepier than going “MUAHAHA!! HE’S GONNA DIE SOON!!”

it's interesting that until now, painter had protection. not in the form of a sealed safe room, or any kind of shields whatsoever, but rather the mere fact that killing him wasn’t yet an option for us. now that protection’s disappearing and there’s nothing he can do about it

when the first draft of the script was done, i realized that if sebastian knew about painter’s fate, and if he truly cared, he might let painter chill in a safe room and protect him there. they’d lose the turrets and whatnot but painter would be fine

so i decided that in the story, there’s something keeping painter in place. an anti-tampering system of sorts built just for him, that either kills him, the tamperer, or both, serving as another obstacle for sebastian to figure out if he really wants to save his buddy

it makes sense in-universe for this to exist too, since there were urbanshade employees psycho enough to track down and kill a guy in cold blood just to get their hands on painter. urbanshade likely wouldn’t want a repeat of that with any other employees

as many of you figured out, YES the colors have meaning!

i didn’t used to like writing, i’ve always largely been a math person. before i really learned to enjoy it, i used to think that details like these in stories were unnecessary, and i’d make fun of them. what a chump i was

colors can have multiple meanings depending on the context. the way they are framed in the “colors” series is definitely not the only way they can be interpreted. i’ll let people draw their own conclusions about it :)

my google doc's script format isn't very formal at all. when i outline a scene i basically put just enough information in for myself to understand what the scene will look like, even if i haven't figured out what the dialogue will be yet

whenever i can’t make up my mind on how a character says something, i write down all the possibilities i come up with and then pick one later. some of the most simple lines go through so many iterations before i find something i’m happy with

before i knew that they were confirmed to have a brotherly relationship, in march i wrote an analysis on sebastian and painter’s roles in the story. i was then informed on tumblr that they see canonically each other as brothers

i later posted on twitter about it, because i could not find where zeal had confirmed this anywhere. so of course Wil randomly pops out of the bushes at that moment to confirm it themselves. thanks wil

these scenes were originally going to play out the exact same way, except they’d take place in the present with seb & painter. after learning this new information about their relationship, i decided to turn them into flashbacks. a decision that paid off IMMENSELY

i always figured sebastian had some amount of fourth-wall awareness as an explanation to how he knows about our multiple runs, can be in several places at once, and is even aware of when we go back into the blacksite after having won the game entirely.

i still have no damn clue what role mr lopee will have in the canon story, but i headcanon that he has something to do with sebastian’s omniscience.

i deliberately kept the update day in the comic ambiguous since we didn’t know when it would be, and still don’t. it’s definitely for the best that it comes out later, we gotta give the devs time to cook but also time to rest.

i changed the script of this page at the last second. i thought it would be interesting to have NSIF praise sebastian for being a good friend, which would have him feeling more guilty. but seb was already showered with praise from painter on the last page, so i switched it up.

then there’s the player’s face on page 12. they were originally going to look very eager to destroy painter. i figured that wouldn’t really work for someone who technically… doesn’t want to be doing what they’re doing. (also congrats to those who noticed which jumpsuit that is)

the future for sebastian and painter’s roles in the story is very uncertain. there are things that are set in stone, and other things that we’re not yet spoiled on, and all of us pretty much have more questions than answers

and even if the plot of this comic didn’t really GO anywhere, that’s okay. sometimes what the characters need is a quiet, calm moment to be in each other’s company… before the storm starts. well, have fun getting the badges, everyone! :P

thanks for following this story for the past month and a half! it's been a journey. it'll probably be a while before the next big story since i have irl stuff to attend to, but i have 5 more stories in the works and i'm excited to show more of what i have planned eventually!

OK THANKS FOR READING BYE

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

About the time cap for the dreams, didn’t Ortho or one of the Shroud parents say something about how their bodies would waste away from lack of food and water? 😨 which would make the lack of urgency even stupider than it already is.

[Referencing this post!]

Ortho states in 7-46 that “[…] everyone’s bodies could atrophy if they go too long without nutritional intake.” This is reiterated recently in a JP update to the main story but I’m too lazy to dig through Ortho’s dialogue and 30+ parts to find that 💀.

However, none of this is hard confirmed. This is just Ortho speculating and talking off the cuff.

Malleus’s magic is described several times as allowing him complete control over everything within its area of effect. It’s possible that this magic also extends to suspending his victims in a form of stasis in order to keep them alive while dreaming for extensive periods of time. After all, wouldn’t the thought of “not having food or water -> thousands of deaths on his hands” occur to Malleus…? It’s not like fae can go forever without sustenance either, so surely is something he considered?

We also know that it is possible for magic to suspend a living being’s need for food and water. The Dawn Knight’s three guardian fairies cast a sleep blessing on Silver, which kept him safe and unable to even age for 400 years.

If three separate fairies (that are surely less powerful than an OB Malleus; they need their power enhanced by Silver’s ring to even perform the spell) can pull this off, then surely an OB Malleus can do the same on a basically endless energy supply + his berserk state. His grandmother Maleficia is described to be more powerful than Malleus regularly, but she is not able to break through his OB’s domain of control. This implies Malleus is currently more powerful than his grandma, so I think he’d be capable of keeping his victims in stasis.

So while I do think the lack of urgency is an issue with book 7’s writing, I’m not sure if the need for food and water is a real concern...?

[anneangel]

So people ask why, in a plot where the characters seem to perform heteronormativity, my ships are almost always the supposed "non-canonical gay ship".

It must be because almost no one really knows how to write a truly "good straight couple".

The characters just look at each other for an incredibly short amount of screen time and, after several exchanges of sensual looks and cheesy dialogues or bad and unoriginal pick-up lines and touches, decide they're going to have crazy sex? Really? And they stay together forever? And maybe have a "happy family"? Blah, rubbish.

Most of these couples barely have any development. Sometimes the female character is clearly there to be paired with the guy, and that's all there is to it, so ridiculous!!

Meanwhile, the characters I ship, that supposed "non-canonical gay ship", have incredible development on their own. They could totally work as "standalone characters" if someone decided to make a spin-off about these character. But they also have excellent joint development together, plots that intertwine and make us hold our breath and root for them both to be okay! And they still have a relationship of trust and loyalty to each other, and they look at each other as if were impossible to live without each other. They seem capable of doing anything for each other.

And, yes, they fight and have disagreements, but this is overcome by a plot that brings the best most moving dialogue, because, deep down, they only want the best for each other and just have different ways of imagining and demonstrating it.

And so they look at each other as if they would kill and die for each other. And even though the plot gives them a heteronormative romance and even a family, sometimes, all of this still seems overshadowed by the relationship they have with each other like "friends", because they look seem unsure of what to do if the one of them go away!

And if one of them leave the other, they can be bewildered; they seem to act as if it were the worst thing that could happen to them, as if the absence of the other were unbearable and would break them forever. And, for some reason, they don't seem to feel the same way about their corresponding heteronormative partner, nor about their family (if they have one). It's as if their "best friend" is EVERYTHING to them, and nothing else matters.

And, in the midst of all this, the heteronormative relationship seems to only exist to try to "perform an heteronormativity standart" because the "best friends'" relationship is already so strong, and people are "talking about it," that the writers are afraid of losing their conservative audience. But, at the same time, they keep queerbaiting, because they also don't want to lose the audience that ships that "best friends forever." Which leads to even more intense and meaningful dialogue and scenes, full of implicit and subtext messages between these characters.

And, fuck off, calling this "friendship"?? Really? Okay.

But, I will shipp it as a romantic couple. Because that's all I expect from a romantic couple when I need look for one: someone to trust with your life, someone who will miss you immensely if you leave, someone to trust with your soul and your secrets, someone to be by your side when you need it most, someone loyal, trustworthy, and who cares about you. Someone who isn't with you for your looks or how fuckable you are, but someone with whom you share a sentimental bond and a big and strong history together.

I don't want a couple who just has crazy sex and decides to procreate like animals, the maleXfemale type who is there just to be a couple. Fuck it off, if that's the heteronormative couple you want me to buy, it's not happening.

I'll ship those "best friends" who have the most intense relationship ever and who look at each other as if there's nothing in the world they wouldn't do for each other! Because they've shared moments of happiness and sadness together, because they've seen the best and worst of each other (and still stayed together), because they've had their ups and downs in their relationship (but always come back to each other), because they've been together through pain and misery, because they didn't abandon each other when things were really bad, because their presence in each other's lives made each other's lives a little better, even when they were facing the worst of things, and they understand each other deeply (in a way no one else can), they can connect intelligibly, as if they could read each other's minds, as if all it took was a look or less.

And therefore, that's why they seem unbeatable together, and I wish them happiness so much.

And, okay, I keep shipping this even when it seems like only one of them knows that love the other, even if it's not reciprocated. You can see that at least one of them loves the other madly and wanted something more, even if it wasn't entirely reciprocated (or it's mutual/reciprocal, but it feels like there's something in the way [impossible love? Even better! Even more shippable]). So yes, in the end, these are the characters I'll ship, the ones I'll want to see kiss, have crazy sex, try to start a family together (maybe?), and be happy!

Why? Because they have a long history of feelings and development within the plot!

Sorry, but it's not my fault if the heteronormative couples in the plot are so boring that my mind wanders to the "non-canonical couple" who seems to have a much better emotional/sentimental bond and development/story together that I want to root/ship for. Blame the writers.

[ladytauria]

hiiiii G4 and W4 for the ask game if you're still doing it

yes i’m still doing it <3

answering these out of order bc i’m really bad at picking just one line haha

W4. Is there a fandom you haven’t before but want to try in 2025? (Or a fandom you’d like to go back and write more for in 2025?)

TBH, I’ve never been good at participating in more than one fandom at a time. I can read for multiple fandoms but writing… Just one. I’ve never known why that is, haha. So, I’d like to keep sticking around in DC for a while longer, I think

But… If I could write for more than one fandom, I would love to go back & finish the fic I’d started for SRMTHFG. I also have several unfinished fics for other fandoms, but IDK if I would ever actually end up having them see the light of day ahskjd

G4. Give me your favorite line from a current WIP.

I love the dialogue from the opening scene for my ghost hunters wip. It’s loosely based on buzzfeed unsolved, though more the fandom joke that the skeptic of the two ghost hunters is actually a demon in disguise shskjdk

“No,” Jason says flatly. “Absolutely not.”

“C’mon,” Tim wheedles. There’s a stubborn set to his jaw, his shoulders. He’s not the kind of person to let go of an idea, once it lodges in his brain. Jason admires it; the sheer force of will packed into all five feet and eight inches of him. He also hates it, especially when it leads to scenarios like this, the two of them on opposite sides, and unwilling to back down.

Because Jason is stubborn too. “No, Tim,” Jason says firmly, digging his metaphorical heels in. “I can think of oh, about a dozen better ways for us to spend our time.”

Tim frowns at him. Jason hates how adorable he finds it; hates the irrepressible urge he feels to smooth it away, perhaps with his own mouth. Tim jabs a finger at Jason’s chest, though the diner table between them keeps him from making contact. “You’re just afraid we’ll find proof, and you’ll have to eat your words.”

Jason scoffs. “Hardly.” He bats Tim’s hand away.

Tim isn’t actually far off the mark. He wants to go ghost hunting—no, more than that, he wants to start a ghost hunting show, exploring Gotham’s more haunted areas, and Jason… well. Jason is worried that they’ll find something. Not because he’ll have to eat his words, though, but because it could be dangerous.

If they stick to the locations that most people considered “active”, they’ll be fine. Those places aren’t haunted, not really. Maybe they had been once, but now it’s all residual energy, brought to life by overactive imaginations and nerves.

But Jason knows Tim—has gotten to know him quite well, over the past couple of years—and he knows that, while he may start with the popular locales, he won’t be satisfied with them forever. That’s charted territory. Tim prefers the unknown; the unexplained. So he’ll go digging, and probably find reports of places that are actually haunted.

And considering that this is Tim, who can find trouble just by walking down the street… well. It’s a recipe for disaster.

Not that Jason can say any of that. As far as Tim knows, Jason doesn’t believe in any of that bullshit. (Honestly, most of the stuff Tim talks about is bullshit, so it isn’t even that hard to pretend.) Jason wants to keep it that way.

Is it cruel, to lie to his best friend the way he’s doing?

Yeah, probably.

But it’s keeping Tim safe, so Jason never lets himself feel bad about it.

“I’m actually worried about you, I dunno, tripping over a raised floorboard and ending up with tetanus, or something,” Jason says. Which, to be fair, also a real fear, if less pressing.

Tim scowls at him and kicks Jason’s knee under the table. “I’m not that bad,” he protests. “And, anyway, even if I was, that’s what you’d be there for. To keep me from getting tetanus.” Tim smiles winningly, and Jason knows he’s lost.

[intothedraft]

When I came to write draft 3, I tore the whole story up and practically started from scratch. Maybe because I didn't know I still had copies of the previous drafts following the Limewire Incident, but also because I'd outgrown it.

Seeing as the first two drafts are so similar, I thought I'd compare the two, and just for fun, show you how I'd write Dying Screams now, if I wanted to keep the plot roughly as-is but also make it, uh, make sense.

First of all, the changes:

Our protagonist is all grown up now

This is a GROWN UP book for GROWN UP kids, so Layane has been aged up to fourteen, and she has an on-page love interest!

In the original book she was either a toddler or eight. I say one or the other, because I switched the names. I guess I liked 'Layane' better for the protagonist.

The stakes have been raised

I can't say it's done well, but there is certainly a lot more action and danger throughout the novel.

Instead of finding their parents bodies and a note before leaving for Hiville, Layane and Clemant need to run and hide from their attacker. When their parents die, they stay dead. There is a sense of dread when Layane wakes in the middle of the ocean, and again when the boat lands on the dead-end island. Layane is almost killed by her 'brainwashed' love interest. Clemant is kidnapped many times, prompting other characters to save her. The bird is terrifying. The Dying Screams are presented as an unkillable threat, rather than 'easily defeated'.

In draft 1, any action/danger was resolved very quickly without much fuss, so it makes a nice change.

The characters (mostly) react to situations appropriately

In draft 1, Clemant hardly reacts to anything around her. Draft 2 has its flaws, but the girls are devastated when their parents are killed. Layane is terrified and angry on the boat. She is giddy when she meets up with Roan and betrayed when he turns on her. When she runs off to join the fighting, it's not because she gets to hold a cool flag, but because she is desperate to save Roan from certain death.

Yes, there are periods in the story where I forget to have characters react to things (and Clemant's personality drops off halfway through), but most of the time they do, which is a step up. They feel like they are reacting to things happening around them, rather than simply observing them.

I really, really care about LORE

We get so much lore in this. If only I could keep it consistent.

We hear about Hiville's history. The battle. The book. The prophecies. The temple. We are told about these things in detail, rather than plot-relevant locations or items just popping up randomly.

Some of the, uh, sillier elements are gone

No more Frenchman who had his DNA removed. No more squirty bottle of live-forever juice. No more Jez getting tied up repeatedly because she's annoying, or wearing jewellery that spells secret messages about how cool she is when she moves fast.

(Honestly, I should have kept that one.)

Because I've come up with BETTER silly stuff

The boat can talk! Jez smashes her own window for no reason! Gevirians canonically killed the dinosaurs! You can drink a potion to make you learn English faster! There's multiple secret villain lairs dotted around Hiville! Mystic was banished for 'being annoying'!

The dialogue is somehow simultaneously better and worse

No further comment.

The writing is much more self-conscious

Most of draft 1 made very little sense, but when I introduced something, I said it with my whole fucking chest.

Yes, this French assassin had his DNA removed by a shadow god. DEAL WITH IT.

This draft is different. I can't keep the history of Hiville consistent for more than two pages, probably because the idea of the first war happening 'millions' of years ago is a bit silly. There's a number of parts where a character explains a lore element (such as how Layane was able to defeat the Dying Screams in the book) several times to make sure the reader 'gets it', which is something I still do when working through plot elements I'm unsure about in first drafts. I think the reason G-slur comes off as insidious is because I was trying far too hard to make her a 'serious' character, to counteract how young-sounding the other Ladies are. The joke about her name is gone, presumably because I didn't want to change it, but I also didn't want to draw attention to how strange it is that she is called that.

It reads like I knew there were parts that were weak at best, but decided to ignore them, either because it's just a draft or because this is my comfort story.

On that note, if twelve-year-old me approached me now and asked me to rewrite this in a way that worked, while keeping most of the plot intact...

DYING SCREAMS: 2025 EDITION

We open on a house somewhere in middle-of-nowhere Somerset. Our sixteen-year-old protagonist, Layane, knows her life is unusual. Her parents have moved their family around many times. They never let her outside alone. Never let Layane speak to anyone. She knows this is strange: she has read books and watched films, and knows she should be in school, should have friends.

She also knows she can't. Her family are in danger. There are bad people out there who would harm or kill them if they were found. Her parents tell her that when she is older, they will tell her everything.

One day, Layane is looking after her eight-year-old sister, Clemant, while her parents are out getting groceries or something. Layane gets drawn into a book she's reading, or show she's watching, or [insert hobby here] and realises her sister has vanished. After a panicked few minutes, she finds Clemant outside, at the edge of the garden. There's a woman riding a horse down the country road, and she has stopped to talk to Clemant, who is amazed seeing the massive animal. The woman doesn't appear to be a threat, but Layane panics and drags her protesting sister back inside. Anyone could have seen them! Not wanting to worry their parents, Layane says nothing to them about what happened.

That night, Layane cannot sleep (unusual for my characters). She is terrified that the woman might be one of the bad people who wants them dead. After a while, she is so tired that she thinks she's hearing things. A woman's voice, telling Layane her family is in danger. A dream, surely. A symptom of the panic from earlier. Then she sees words carved into the wall, shockingly real. They tell her to grab her sister, get her parents, and run to the garage.

Layane hears a sound outside. It could be her parents, or an animal. Could be something else. She springs into action, grabs her sister, and goes downstairs just in time to see her father killed. She does not see his attacker.

Layane, Clemant and their mother attempt to flee, but the floorplan of the house actually makes sense this time. Layane's mother tells Layane and Clemant to run, not into the garage, just get away from here. She causes a distraction that tragically leads to her death, but not before shouting for the person to leave them alone, that they haven't told anyone anything, and the girls run outside.

Once out, Layane hears the voice again. The garage. Get into the garage. Panicked, she obeys, and finds that weird boat her parents have always had, covered in a sheet. The voice tells her to get in. The boat - an amphibious vehicle with both magical and mechanical elements - activates immediately. The girls fall asleep, and it fires down the road, destination unknown.

Layane wakes up and all she can see is ocean. The boat is still moving. She feels strange and groggy and does not think her sleep was natural. She panics, starts pressing buttons, turning the wheel to see if anything happens. Nothing does - the boat keeps moving forwards. At some point Clemant wakes up and joins Layane's frantic investigation of the boat. After a while, they give up. Layane hits and kicks the seemingly indestructible control panel, scaring Clemant. Their parents are dead. They have no one. They will die out here.

Then in the distance, Layane spots a tiny lump in the sea. An island. Her relief is short-lived, because it's a rock in the middle of endless ocean. To her horror, the boat brings them right to it, and an electronic voice announces they have reached their destination.

At first, Layane is confused. Why would the boat take them to a small, dead-end cave? Then the boat says a word and the wall opens up, revealing a marble staircase leading endlessly downwards. Carved into its walls are depictions of women with four arms and wings in impressive clothes. The first is standing under a waterfall, the next dancing in flame, the next has plants growing around her, the next flying in front of the sun, the last surrounded by darkness. There are more carvings further down, similar designs, and the staircase seems to go on forever. Layane and Clemant do not want to go down. The air is stale, and the staircase becomes an eye-aching optical illusion when they try to see its end. Then the boat starts rolling down, the stairs becoming a slope that allows it to descend with ease, and the girls know they have no choice. The ocean goes on forever. They follow the boat, which stops and lets them back in.

Layane wakes up, now certain that something knocked her out. All she can remember is being on that boat, those marble depictions of four-armed women repeating over and over as she went down. Gods, she thinks. Now Layane is no longer in the boat, but in a bed in a grand, wood-panelled room with green furnishings. No sign of Clemant, but there is a woman at the end of the bed. A blue-haired woman wrapped in fine, blue clothing. And she has wings.

Before Layane can splutter a reaction, the woman introduces herself as... well, not G-slur, I'd come up with a more appropriate name, but for the purpose of this I'll continue to call her G-slur. She tells Layane that Clemant is fine, and recovering from the effects of the journey in the next room. She is so sorry about what happened to Layane's parents. She tried to enter their minds, but could not. Adults are usually more resistant to someone entering their minds.

Layane relaxes a little. She clocks the extra two arms and tail, and knows this woman is one of those figures carved into marble, or something like them. She asks G-slur what this place is, and G-slur explains they are in an underground country called Hiville, populated by Gevirians. G-slur is one of the country's leaders, their Lady of Water. Hiville is place of powerful magic, and its leaders are the most powerful of them all. Each Lady has an important task in keeping their underground country inhabitable. Without them, this place would return to barren rock.

Then Layane asks what happened to her parents, and G-slur explains that Layane's family are special. Centuries ago, one of Layane's ancestors was the first person to enter Hiville, after a boat carrying her and a friend capsized near to the entrance. Maybe they were scientists or engineers. Something like that, anyway. They were found by two Gevirians who took pity on them and brought them inside. While they were recovering, the two humans were introduced to Gevirian magic, and the Gevirians worked with them to combine technology and magic into mechanical marvels such as the boat. Eventually, the two humans wanted to go back to their families, and the Gevirians thought it would be useful to have two people to help them relay information about the outside world into Hiville, so they agreed.

Unfortunately, that was where things started to go wrong. Layane's ancestor wanted to bring her family into Hiville, to keep their creations and magic to themselves. Hiville is a peaceful place, and she did not want to ruin that. Her friend, who obviously has the surname Sovance, thought that they should sell their inventions, along with Hiville's very existence. Think of how much money they would make!

Naturally this came to a head, and Great-Great-Great-etc-Grandma Croe killed her friend. Whether it was self-defence or not is unknown. This started a rivalry between the two families that has been ongoing to this day. The Gevirians naturally aligned themselves with the Croes, and the Sovances lost the knowledge of where Hiville's entrance is, but they know what was taken from them. Supposedly they have been tinkering with the magical items taken from Hiville by their ancestors, in hiding, planning their revenge for years. They must have been who killed Layane's family.

Layane is horrified. She asks to see her sister, and G-slur takes her there, while reassuring Layane that they are safe now. The Gevirians owe a great debt to her family for keeping their country secret, and Layane and Clemant can live here, safe from the enemy who killed their parents. That's what G-slur keeps referring to the person who killed their parents: their greatest enemy. It's a bit heavy-handed but Layane doesn't pick up on that, eager to see her sister. Layane and Clemant have a tearful reunion.

Shortly afterwards, they are introduced to Jezirah, the Lady of Plants. She seems to be in her late teens, and doesn't act as Layane would expect the leader of a country to act. Jezirah has a bangle that lets her focus her powers, because she's still pretty rusty. Jezirah tells Layane that she's younger than she looks, but was aged up via magic after the previous Lady of Plants died suddenly. It's not hereditory, Jezirah explains, but after a Lady dies, a random child is born with her powers. Some Gevirians aren't happy that the Ladies rule Hiville, she says. It would cause so many issues if the position was taken by a baby, right after the last Lady of Plants died, especially as she was starting to sympathise with the people's desire to vote for a leader like humans usually do shortly before her death. Still, never mind all that! Jezirah likes her job! Looking after Layane and Clemant is the first time she's been given any responsibility, and she takes it very seriously.

Over the next few weeks, Layane privately mourns her parents but does enjoy her newfound freedom. She's staying in Jezirah's massive, luxurious treehouse tended to by Jezirah's staff, can explore the nearby towns whenever she wants (even though it feels odd that the Gevirians treat her as a curiosity), and in Jezirah she finally has a friend. She is angry that her parents didn't bring the family here sooner. She could have been living like this all along, and they would still be alive.

One day, while walking, she comes across a temple. Unlike the other buildings here, it is shabby, crumbling. There's statues of some of the previous Ladies, now covered in weeds and damp. Layane walks up to the entrance, and feels a deep sense of dread. She thinks she hears a voice - or maybe just the wind - calling her closer. She runs away.

When she tells Jezirah what she saw, Jezirah is worried. They return to the temple. No sign of the voice, but the place is creepy as hell and Jezirah thinks maybe Layane imagined it.

I'm sure this won't come up again.

We get some more detail about the Ladies. Maybe Layane meets the others here. Maybe not. Point is: they exist, and occasionally show up at Jezirah's house, or Jezirah goes to meet them and brings the kids along because she's a mess. We see some cool elemental powers, but their roles feel more... politician than god, the longer Layane spends with them. Shafina is silent and Layane isn't sure what to think about her. G-slur appears to be running the show. Maybe I'll even give Saphirah a personality this time.

One day, someone arrives at Jezirah's house, escorted inside by Jezirah's guards. A Gevirian girl around Layane's age, who -

(Of course I'm making Roan a girl. Also, I'm going to change the spelling to Roen, as it is in every other draft. I know I could make Jezirah a viable love interest too, but I'm sticking with the previous plot. Anyway.)

- was walking near the temple with her father, when he heard a voice. The girl, Roen, watched in horror as her father walked deeper into the temple, touched a brick that transported them to a hall deep as the earth's core, and walked up to an old book on a podium before disappearing. Roen ran until she reached Jezirah's grand treehouse to ask for help.

Of course, Layane hears all about this afterwards, as Roen cannot speak English. All Layane knows is there was a commotion, and something bad must have happened to that girl. The other Ladies turn up to discuss, before heading to the temple. Layane tries to listen in to their conversation, but they are speaking Gevirian.

Afterwards, when Roen is safely at home with her family / other parent / whoever, Jezirah tells Layane about the Book. An ancient magical artefact, created by the Lady of Shadow from hundreds of years ago, to contain a human army that discovered them and tried to attack. The thing was designed to drag every human in Hiville inside it, so it's lucky that the only humans in Hiville were the army. Unfortunately the way she bound the book meant that they were unable to die, and continued to survive within the pages as a ghostly army. (Happens to us all.) The Gevirian Ladies at the time tried to destroy the book, but found they were unable to without opening it and releasing the ghostly threat they called the Dying Screams. Instead, the Lady of Shadows cursed it so that whoever opened the book would hand control of the army to their greatest enemy. No one would ever open it, but they hid it in the temple anyway, just in case.

It's all okay, though! They've knocked down the entrance to the temple. It was old and creepy, anyway. Some leftover from when the Gevirians treated the Ladies as gods. Jezirah always hated the thing.

After Jezirah has told Layane all of this, Layane realises that Clemant has been listening in, and is understandably terrified. What if the person who killed our parents gets the book, Clemant says? They're our enemy. Layane and Jezirah reassure her that nothing is going to happen.

Dot dot dot.

A few days later, Layane runs into Roen in the nearby market. They don't speak each other's languages, but somehow Roen knows Layane just lost her parents, too. Roen shows Layane around and they have a nice little time together during the calm before the storm. They teach each other a few words in their respective languages. It's nice.

Then the calm before the storm becomes the storm. Clemant is in bed, when she hears a voice. Her mother's voice. She thinks she is seeing things, but her mother explains she's a ghost. She can't touch Clemant, or stay with her long. But there's a book that contains all the ghosts, and if it's opened, Clemant's parents will be free. Ghost Mother leaves, and Clemant follows.

Layane wakes to find Clemant's bed empty. She goes to look for Clemant and sees her outside at the base of the tree, walking into the forest as though sleepwalking. Layane gets Jezirah and they set off.

Quickly, they lose Clemant. Jezirah asks Layane to wait while she swings through the trees to find her. She leaves her bangle with Layane, in case she needs it.

Then Roen shows up. She is acting strangely. She seems to know more words in English now, and it soon becomes apparent that she is there to kill or harm Layane. It makes no sense. They had such a nice time together! Roen says she needs to kill Layane because humans will always try to kill Gevirians. And she has a gun! Oh no! Roen tries to shoot Layane, and Layane uses the bangle erratically to defend herself and ends up blasting Roen with magic, sending her flying into the undergrowth. Jezirah spots Clemant near the temple, then returns having heard the commotion. Layane is traumatised but decides to focus on her sister.

Jezirah and Layane reach the temple and find a hole has been dug through the rubble. A perfectly Clemant-sized hole.

We cut to Clemant, who has reached the book. Her mother is with her, and the moment Clemant touches the book, she can swear she can feel her mother's hand on her shoulder. Her nails are long and sharp, which is weird, but that's fine. As Clemant opens the book, she realises the thing on her shoulder is a fucked up human-bird hybrid with swirling eyes, but it's too late. She collapses.

Jezirah and Layane eventually rescue her, and pull her away as the Dying Screams are released from the book. They run as the ghosts swarm around the temple, then spill free, and fly towards towns and villages. Jezirah and Layane hide with Clemant.

There's chaos. Blood. Fighting. (Etc.) Jezirah and the girls make it to G-slur's underwater house to ask for help. G-slur says she knows what must have happened: that family, the Sovances, must have found a way into Hiville. Presumably they followed Layane and Clemant inside! And they have all sorts of magic-enhanced gadgets and biological experiments, including something powerful enough to make you do anything according to rumours. G-slur dashes away and heroically pushes back the Screams with her powers, saving hundreds of civilians. Her magic will not hold forever, though, she says.

Layane and Clemant hide out in Jezirah's house as the Gevirians go to war. Roen comes to, sees that her country has been overtaken by fighting and ghosts, and realises she has a big gap in her memory. Word has got out that there are two humans in Hiville who have doomed everyone. They even hid the book, you know, the only thing known to stop the Screams, because they would be sucked in, too. It's not in the temple any more, so they must have hid it! Roen knows she has to warn Layane. She heads to Jezirah's house, has a confused and panicked conversation with the others - for some reason, after her brain was scrambled, her English has massively improved, something that Jezirah said happened to her after she was aged up via magic by G-sl- right as the Gevirian army discovers Layane and Clemant's location.

The girls, helped only by Jezirah after the other Ladies seemingly side with the mob (G-slur privately telling Jezirah that she will fix it, don't worry), end up on the run, aiming to leave Hiville. At some point, Jezirah reminds us all that the last Lady of Plants died under mysterious circumstances. Maybe because she's angsting over not being able to help much. At some point Roen and Layane kiss, or Jezirah and Layane kiss (providing I have made Jezirah old enough so I don't have to examine the ethical implications of Layane kissing someone who was aged up via magic), or they all kiss each other in front of Clemant, who is very uncomfortable.

They face threats from the army, the bird, and the Sovances. Except the Sovances seem... off. It's unclear why they're there, what they're doing. They seem to want to make money from Hiville but also want to completely destroy it. After one of The Gals (dealer's choice) manages to knock one of the Sovances out, the captured Sovance comes to and it becomes apparent that they were under the spell of something powerful. They have no idea where they are or what they're doing.

But why, Layane says, would they hypnotise themselves with their own bird? It doesn't make any sense!

They don't have time to dwell, because they get attacked again, or [miscellaneous peril]. But good news, they're close to where the boat is stored by the entrance of Hiville! (Note to self: actually map out how Hiville is laid out.) On the way, they pass the temple, which is... being rebuilt? It's odd, why the hell would anyone want to rebuild it? The old statues are gone, replaced by a new one, which looks a hell of a lot like -

Then it hits them. G-slur. She must have orchestrated all of this. She expressed annoyance that the people no longer treat the Ladies as gods, she has the power to control people, and as the only one able to push back the Screams she has the most to gain from the chaos. Layane and Clemant never saw their parents' killer so it could have easily been her, which would mean she now controls the Dying Screams! Layane remembers something her mother said before she died, we haven't told anyone anything. That doesn't really make sense if it's aimed at the Sovances.

Makes a whole lot of sense aimed at G-slur, though...

Holy fuck, she might have even killed the last Lady of Plants!

Jezirah has a bit of a crisis, realising that the girls were put under her care because G-slur knew she would fuck up. Then they all rally. The BOOK. They need to find the book and use it to trap the Dying Screams again. If G-slur orchestrated this, she presumably has the means to stop it, so she must have the book!

Which means... she plans for Layane and Clemant to die. Layane has a choice. She can leave, let G-slur become a dictator, and stay on the run from presumably both G-slur and maybe the Sovances for the rest of her life. Or she can fix the first place that has ever felt like home.

She decides the latter.

Now armed with a plan, and probably several swords and guns, Layane sends Clemant and the remaining (now un-hypnotised and very confused) Sovances to safety. Maybe there was once a feud, but it's over now. Layane insists to Jezirah and Roen that she will join the others before they activate the book, as they won't let her sacrifice herself.

Then, they head to G-slur's house. G-slur is not there when the girls arrive, but they are faced with soldiers/booby traps/some kind of threat. Maybe it turns out Saphirah is in on it, because she has a personality now. They search until they find the Book, but... oh shit! They have no idea how to use it to trap the Screams!

G-slur arrives and tries to stop them via horrible water magic and mind control, and Layane and Roen escape with the book as Jezirah holds her off. Layane and Roen head to find Shafina, who has never spoken whenever she previously appeared and has always felt like a bit of a wildcard. Supposedly it was the Lady of Shadow who trapped the ghostly army last time, so she must know!

They are of course right, and it turns out Shafina not only knows, but was the person who created the book in the first place. Yep, she's super old. She says she can activate it, but then Layane will be trapped in the book, too. Shafina could probably stop G-slur as well, but she's been alive for so long that she prefers to just observe. Shafina teaches them the words to use. Layane and Roen tell her she's a coward, before racing away to get Layane to safety before activating the book. They don't think their harsh words had any impact on Shafina, but she does save Jezirah from being killed by G-slur by yoinking her away.

On the way, Layane and Roen are stopped by G-slur's army. It looks like they're stealing the book! Layane immediately decides to sacrifice herself and yells the words that binds the Screams to the book.

In the aftermath, G-slur acts like this was her plan all along. She let Layane into Hiville because she knew - because of her awesome powers - that Layane would save them. The temple housing the book is rebuilt, and is basically a temple to G-slur, worshipping her powers and role in the war. Jezirah and Roen are in hiding, terrified that G-slur will find and kill them before they can tell everyone the truth.

Meanwhile, inside the book, Layane comes to. She's still alive, still solid, unlike the other ghosts in the book, who appear to be fading. They have been held to this earth for too long. They don't attack her. While outside of G-slur's control, they seem more... trapped. Tired and confused. Stuck to a world in a half-life. Layane tells them she has a plan to free them all.

In the weeks afterwards, something odd starts happening. Gevirians who visit the temple hear a voice. Layane's voice, telling them that she has defeated the Dying Screams within the book, and that G-slur was the one controlling them. That this was all a trick.

G-slur brushes it off publicly as the Screams attempting to sow discord. Then privately, she goes to the temple to check out the book. It seems... different. It's no longer trying to drag people inside. G-slur realises that Layane must be telling the truth. She doesn't know how the magic works, nor the impact throwing a 21st century teenager into a book full of, I don't know, Viking (?) ghosts would have. She approaches the book and opens it, aiming to free Layane and kill her.

Of course, the Dying Screams are not dead yet, and by opening the book, G-slur handed total control of them over to her greatest enemy: Layane.

The Screams burst free and tear G-slur apart before she can freeze them in living ice or whatever. Layane follows, and her last act of control over the ghosts is to release them - something that G-slur and the other Gevirians could have done all along, if they'd thought of the ghosts as anything other than a mindless threat. The Screams disappear. Hiville is saved.

Everyone finds out what happened quickly, because G-slur's arrogance meant she left a tonne of evidence that she was evil all along. This includes evidence that Layane's family used to live in Hiville, until G-slur started using them as scapegoats for anything that went wrong, and they fled. Hiville's people get to vote for a leader for the first time, rather than leaving ruling the country to those born with elemental powers, and funny thing is: no blue-haired baby is born in the immediate aftermath, and Hiville continues to function without its Lady of Water. Layane and Clemant decide to stay in Hiville. It's nice. Peaceful. A world of magic, etc etc.

There's an epilogue, because I know twelve-year-old me would have loved an epilogue. Layane and Roen, or Layane and Jezirah, or whatever, grow up and have a baby together. That baby, some variation of half-Gevirian-half-human, is born with shocking blue hair.

THE END

This... turned out longer than I planned. If I don't write something for my next writing group meeting I'm going to have to admit it's because I wrote this instead.

[ichinose-kazuma]

Wait I think I've seen that fuckass Ichinose card in a reddit post

Here's the link: https://www.reddit.com/r/TribeNine/comments/1jtgtw2/power_harassment_lebenstrieb_stories/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=1

oooooooooooooooooo?

Thank yyou I am now going to combust. I am not going to spontaneously combust. Leaving an Ichinose-shaped crater in Poland forever. I am going to claim several lives in doing so . The entire area will be lost. Wish I could now go start punching the table in despair without my mother a few meters away judging me

Not my complete thoughts since today's a pretty sleepy day for me but anyway,

I know of some people who upon reading that a fictional character had a cold would. Nevermind

This sounds like something that I would actually write about him. Like straight up. Veneration: the T9 devs agree I am more-or-less objectively correct about the character of Ichinose Kazuma

googling what dorayaki is in order to engage with his interests. Ohh that looks fine. I would put that in my mouth. Dunno if I would like it. But I would be partial to trying it

Ichinose lightweight lore. Idk what "not good at drinking" would mean in exact specifics though I am also not very. Good at drink stuff. What the hells a martini or nalewka or goldwasser, all smells the same (bad), real men pour half a glass worth of isopropyl alcohol in their bath so the skin pores will absorb it and we fucking don't like it, but we know we have to.

hehe he likes dessert <3

wait I just remembered. That one scene where he yells at his useless goon for forgetting his drink. Did his tolerance like, got better or was he enduring through the torments in order to appear Cool or what

"how incredibly rigid and incompetent can you be, only knowing how to follow the rules?! (did not actually say it out loud before giving up)" in the context of the things he actually says in the main game is. hm

once again gonna google castella. looks spongy is that one of those sponge-structured thingies I heard people talk about

I am on Ichinose's side on this one actually you can persecute me all you want. What's wrong with a castella. Perhaps it was indeed the boss' fault for not being clear enough with him about him needing to apparently buy the Debbie Wingham's Runway Cake as a souvenir in order to maintain company respectability or whatever. Also he might be an unreliable narrator with saying that his boss proceeded to verbally insult him multiple times afterwards, he also might not. If he wasn't then that's Bad and Mean. And he should have killed them. Idk how it is in Japan never been there but itssaa ffuckinh souvernir..... .....

Ichinose's strong as fuck for going that long without realizing he has a cold. I would have toppled over on the ground pathetically as soon as I started getting the mildest congestion symptoms

Ichinose and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. I'm having a blast meanwhile. His pain my gain

I lied I actually do feel bad for him even more. We are both suffering fuck our stupid baka lives truly

I am engaging with every single media wrong because no matter what if you give a specific set of traits to a villain I would straight up refuse to hate them for anything and just feel bad for them. Like not even in an acceptable way but moreso like I wish you got help so you didn't kill those approximately 104 people. Another torturous case of me seeing too much of myself in fictional villains only. The way he thinks is so reminiscient of my own mind, some of the dialogue in this one sounds like something that I would think on the semi-daily, but never show because of my masking and knowing that playing nice with people is so much more important; I don't really like interacting with others anymore, because of how much the longer they talk to me like we're equals or something the more I hate them and cuss them out in my head, without even listening to what they're saying at all, forever angry at the entire world for not realizing how much insignificant it is compared to me and it's just Some Guy giving me the directions to the bathroom the whole time. Ichinose Kazuma can be something that is so personal to the average Ichinose-Kazuma (with a dash) (it's this blog). Granted I am exaggerating a little bit but in order to understand my absolute and thorough obsession with Ichinose you gotta know that we are very similiar little things.

Ichinose Kazuma I am cupping your face in my hands I could have taught you how to normalmode instead of whatever the hell you're doing.

Wait actually nevermind, not gonna say that masking is the requirement or the best option for bettering your life, sorry bout that. Instead Ichinose Kazuma I am cupping your face in my hands this time even stronger, I could have taught you how to get healthy and sustainable sources or supply and hype yourself up without casualties and also you can tell me about whatever the hell happened in your childhood I promise I'm as good as a licensed therapist and wouldn't just say "damn that sucks" but if I hypothetically would then maybe you'd feel better anyway or something. Just throwing offers there. I could be your narcissism mentor boy I mean they I mean robot .

[starlitprism]

GMing and Cooperation

So you're probably thinking "oh like a tabletop game. Cooperating. Telling a story together" and you're right! Sorta. We're getting more specific than that. I am going to start by posing a question. When does character creation end? Does it ever? Does it have to? Should it?

I don't know about most people but I am one of the people in my friend's group who is almost always the GM of her group. I like GMing. I love telling a story. I also sometimes want to let loose and not have to craft something from the ether for several others... but not completely.

See, I have a GM's love of creation and that means I have a really hard time, well, not creating. So I talk with my GM (another forever GM) and go over thing after thing after thing proposing ideas, giving my thoughts, sharing my character's current state of mind, and possible ways to take the character in the future. We're in near constant dialogue at least insofar as in between each session I bring up the character at least once or twice.

And some of you might ask why? Don't I want mystery? Don't I want to be surprised? YES. I live for it actually. Curiosity is one of my primary motivators as a player. Few things will invest me more than a mystery to delve into (the other way being excessive emotional and consensual stabbings of myself during the game in the form of shit happening to or around my character). And this need not get rid of ALL mystery! The other reason being I literally told my GM to "make me bleed" and then point out the various ways she could emotionally stab my character and myself. It's very helpful

Not all GMs want to talk this much I imagine. To have a player so involved but I want to advocate for it anyway. It's a cooperation between the player and the GM to craft a story. Maybe you don't know the ending but sometimes it's ok to know a few story beats. It removes some of the pressure from the game master or whatever your term is and instead, you give something to them. A tool. An outline. Jolly cooperation at its best.

Hell, most recently my character started planning for a party for example (see here: https://www.tumblr.com/starlitprism/757035153048715264/me-to-my-gm-ok-my-character-is-prepping-for?source=share )

Now I could have left this stuff up to the GM but I didn't. I came back with a party playlist, party games (mechanics included), and a guest list. I largely just built it all for her. Because my character was making it. Why shouldn't it have my touch all over the damn thing? PLUS it let said GM focus on my oncoming possible demise (and the demise of the multiverse. Not my fault). I admit this blog post is less an argument for this as much as examples of it working but I wanted to write it anyway as a sort of recommendation to try it. To talk to whoever is running your game and ask them "do you want to work together?" It will make it easier on them and will let you have more say assuming it is agreed upon.

A tabletop game is not somewhere where one person runs the show and the rest are there to passively watch. No. It's collaborative storytelling. So why not collaborate? And who knows, maybe you'll bottle some lightning together

And no I don't expect this to be entirely new. I just want to share something that has brought me SO much joy for so long.

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Hi Rose 💜 Weird question time! Do you have a favourite quote(s) from the series you've watched? Like, some sentence that got stuck in your head. I am looking at the empty wall in my room and feeling a very adult urge to just write something on it so I'm looking for inspirations.

No pressure though, it's just my head is completely empty and my memory is bad 😅

Hi Kat💜

So my memory is also terrible. A lot of the times I forget quotes really quickly. But I was thinking about this and going through the rolodex in my brain, and realized that I do remember lines from shows, but usually they aren't significant by themselves. Like for me it's a quote that brings me straight into the show again, like I'm seeing in my head and it's invoking the same feelings that I felt during the show. (also there's also the language thing, where I'm not always sure if I know exactly what they're saying so I'm always afraid of giving it weight for some reason)

Like for example. If I'm thinking of WDYEY, I think of onions, and chicken thighs. Specifically "I think I should use two chicken thighs", as said by Shiro. Because it makes me remember them instantly, and have the same feeling I had when I watched. Also lot of the times I think of bits of dialogue and not necessarily lines by itself. Like for instance in ULS when Hotae is talking to Donghee while cleaning and he says a bunch of things ending with something like "But that's all bullshit. Because when you can't endure something, then you just can't endure it."

So I don't know if these will help you, because although I think I could maybe put them on my wall or something, and it would be meaningful to me, I don't know if it would be the same for you.

But anyway, you asked and I will tell you some of my favourite lines, that I think of, when I remember certain shows. (these are from memory, so they might not be verbatim)

Light on me "Yesterday, today and tomorrow. I'll still be thinking about you" Shinwoo - this is of course an all time favourite.

Love Sick "It barely takes any time to fall in love, so why does it hurt so much to say goodbye?" Noh (I'm gonna stop at one with this one because I'd be here all day)

Gaya Sa Pelikula "Tell me a story Karl." & "I refuse to be a plot device that triggers somebody else's identity crisis only to be left alone in the end" & "Jesus is too forgiving to be a Capricorn" Vlad (yeah this show also had a lot that I like)

Kieta Hatsukoi "We don't have to be like everyone else" Ida

If it's with you "I think liking you might be good" Ryuji

Old Fashion Cupcake "Don't just be a part of my life. Please be my entire life" Togawa

To My Star "If it's too hard for you. I'll go to you." Seo Joon

We Best Love "Am I still the lucky one?" WBL 2 "You wanted to stay with me forever, but you didn't believe in my forever" Shu Yi

Theory of Love "Why Khai? Why are you still waiting" "I don't wanna love you anymore. It hurts" < I can hear this one in my head. Third

The Eighth Sense "I'm getting sick of wearing a mask" & "Let's try it together even if we're afraid" Jae Won (this one is another I'd have several)

Unintentional Love Story "I'll love you instead." Ji Won Young

I've not been able to really go look, because life, but I know I have more and if more come to me I'll let you know. I know there are a couple from kdramas I really like but for the life of me I can't remember them right now. The only one that comes to mind is from Navillera that it's just "Did you soar?" cause I get emotional just thinking about it.

Anyway since perhaps I'm not the best person for this particular thing, because I have a terrible memory and maybe because I'm more of a visual person when it comes to tv, I thought I'd open the floor to some people that might be able to help. So tagging some folks that might be able to contribute to your endeavour.

@lurkingshan @twig-tea @wen-kexing-apologist @bengiyo @hyeoni-comb (no pressure of course)

[ladyhindsight]

Hi! I saw that on your blog you’ve already addressed the topic of incest in shadowhunters several times, even recently. However there are two specific lines that honestly really disturbed me, and from what I’ve read so far, it doesn’t seem like you’ve ever addressed them directly. So I wanted to share my discomfort and maybe discuss it even just to talk it over with someone because they honestly made me feel sick. They’re lines in really poor taste, just thrown in there maybe because, in CC’s mind (I truly don’t know why), this kind of line/ joke is supposed to be provocative or funny, but to me, it’s anything but.

The first line is from the scene at the Seelie Court in CoA, when Izzy and Simon are talking:

“Well, I don’t know about you, Simon,” Isabelle said impatiently, “but I’d like to get Clary out of here.”

“Like you’d kiss Alec,” he shot back, “just because the Seelie Queen told you to.”

“Of course I would.” She sounded annoyed. “If the other option was staying trapped in the Seelie Court forever. Who cares, anyway? It’s just a kiss.”

Like… Isabelle basically saying, “Yeah, I’d kiss my brother if that’s what it took to get out of here” um, no thanks. I don’t have siblings, but tbh if I did, the last thing that would ever cross my mind is to say something like that, and with such nonchalance, too…

And then there’s that line Jace says to Sebastian in CoG, when he still believes he’s Valentine’s son and doesn’t know who Sebastian really is. He says something like: “You seem a bit young to be dating my father”

Was it really necessary to throw in a father-son incest joke? What hell!!??😭

These two lines just confirm what’s become increasingly obvious CC has a thing for incest. She denies it or rather, her most die-hard fans insist it’s not true but at this point it’s really hard not to see it. Anyone who says she doesn’t clearly just doesn’t want to face reality.

Clare once tweeted that she liked shipping Damon and Stefan Salvatore from The Vampire Diaries together when asked whether she liked Delena or Stelena. The fact that the two characters are brothers “makes it better!” (Direct quote from the tweet)

I really, really, really don't understand why at this point, and after all these years, tweets, books, and made-up fantasizing, there are even people who feel the need to "defend" Clare and her obvious fetishes. Some of the writing could be just shitty jokes and bad humor if there wasn't such an overarching and ongoing theme behind them. I dare say that the MOST of the readership feels the same sense of disgust when imagining such a scene as the one in the Seelie Court between Alec and Isabelle. But for some strange reason, the exact same situation between Jace and Clary should be hot.

I may have touched on that point indirectly before when I talked about Isabelle's character being completely incapable of criticizing or opposing Jace at any point. Isabelle is always Jace's biggest supporter, and never stands up to Jace. Instead, Alec, whom Clare doesn't really like, is often the target of Isabelle's sisterly teasing. It's amusing that the realistic moments in the relationships between the characters actually come from the author not caring about a particular character, let alone wanting to bestow upon him the same greatness and praise that is showered on Jace.

Furthermore, that bit of dialogue ignores the fact that it wasn't just a "kiss" like a peck, which is how some families tend to show affection and closeness (and even then, by the parents of the family towards the children). It was a deep, passionate, and romantic kiss that doesn't belong between family members. Yet Isabelle treats the two as the same because Clare herself is incapable of writing her characters with nuance and differing opinions. Simon isn’t written outright condemning anything either.

As for that Valentine part, I simply have no words. That's just absurd.

Facing reality isn’t what Clare particularly does. If Clare had wanted to write about incest, to actually deal with it realistically, this wouldn't be the end result. Ultimately, this topic boils down to how incompetent and unreflective Clare is as a writer. How you can write thousands of pages without developing at all on the level of thinking speaks directly of a lack of intelligence in this regard and outright unwillingness as well. Not to mention the lack of emotional intelligence when responding to criticism results in blaming everything else and reveals the constant lack of personal responsibility. Then again, how would her characters be capable of responsibility when the author herself clearly has no concept of it?

[welcometowaltacademy]

Heyyy...

It's been over half a year since my last update lol. A lot of that has been, like usual, related to my work schedule. I will say I had a bit of an epiphany in June though about my work and how I need to handle it in order to make sure it doesn't get in the way of my personal life, which includes my comic editing. And that was really, really healing.

But I've also been kind of in my head during the last several months about the formatting of the comic which I've mentioned here in passing. I've shared this a lot on Patreon, but I really want to share it here in full too since I know this is the wider group. Read more cause it's a lot.

Basically, I have a ton of issues fully written and have had them for years. However, I've been getting bogged down when it comes to the editing, and even though my head is moving more and more forward with the story, I'm physically stuck with it not being shared.

That made me think it might be better to tell the story in a light novel with visuals format so that I could share my writing but still have a visual aspect of the comic, since I really do love the comic.

And I tested this out on Patreon and shared it.

I'm going to be honest though, and this is what I also shared on Patreon, this format also bogged me down! It took a lot of time to not only reframe the scripts/outlines as an actual dialogue/prose but also figure out where to include visuals. The work of inputting the visuals into the writing almost ended up taking as long as just editing an issue.

That being said, I would love to get feedback from the larger group on this format, so I'm going to share this one post from my Patreon publicly so people can see it. It will also give you all a new issue (Issue #259), which I'm so happy for you to finally have because y'all have been PATIENT.

Please feel free to leave replies or send me asks with feedback, I’d be so happy to get it.

In the meantime, on my own, I'm starting to think I just need to move back to a shorter issue format. Even though I LOVE the long issues, they really do slow down how often I can share anything, and I tend to struggle with my perfectionist tendencies when I make them longer.

What I'm thinking is that this might just mean a scene between characters will span several issues to get it to be comprehensive, instead of trying to fit full scenes into one issue.

Again, still bouncing this back and forth, and I'm really open to any feedback, but this is where I'm at.

Basically I just want to start sharing content and talking about the comic again, and I need to make sure my formatting or process or whatever you want to call it isn't completely blocking that.

That being said it's summer, I'm sitting in my craft room, and I'm answering comments on the comic and editing/writing. Life is good, and content should be coming soon.

Thank you all again for holding it down with me for so long. I know it's been forever, so the continued support and kind comments mean more than I can even convey. 🩵🩵🩵

[redmountain]

thanks @jiubilant and @ansu-gurleht for the catch up tag :-]

📚️ currently reading: nothing orz but i read becky chambers' psalm for the wild built about a month ago and it gave me Big Feelings

📺 currently watching: severance which is killing me and black sails, just finished s3. god s1 and s2 were so fuckin banger but the dialogue writing takes a real dip in s3, becomes almost death note-esque at points (very "let me articulate exactly why this action i'm taking is strategically advantageous b/c i've anticipated my opponents' moves 5 steps ahead"). HOWEVER i am so into flint's emotional arc and character beats and especially his relationship w/ silver. forever angry about latent homophobia in how the show portrays his gayness vs the lesbian characters' gayness though . scott was robbed, max was robbed, i always hated eleanor but she too was robbed, wtf happened? anyway i could go on

🍪️ currently consuming: i'm hungry and i need a snack :-( maybe tortilla chips and hummus soon

🤩 current obsession: you KNOW it's elder scrolls

🎶 last song i listened to: crazy world by mnek this album is crammed full of bops

✨ last series: womp womp i don't really read long series of books anymore. however i HAVE been reading @shadovvmarks's little lightbringer fic series (it's good!!)

🎬️ last movie: watched best in show today b/c a couple friends spent 20 min talking it up when we were out birding this morning. somehow in that time they left out the best part about it (jane lynch and jennifer coolidge play unhinged lesbians). thumbs down for casual zionism sprinkled in though

🌶️ sweet, savory, or spicy: very spicy and savory always, sweet every now and then

🎨️ favorite color: always been black but i have room in my heart for green too

☕️ tea or coffee: coffee sorry im american

🌐️ last thing i looked up: cunoesse from disco elysium b/c bf is playing it and missed some checks and i wanted to know her deal

i'll tag @shadovvmarks @elavoria @the-blood-tide-rises @da3drat @pruinescense @kagrenacs @white-spectre -- no pressure of course!

[wondrouswendy]

Tagged by the incredibly kind @nanuk-the-bat 😊 Thanks for tagging me!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 86 fics!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

736,742 -- somehow it feels like this should be much higher, but there are several stories which haven't made it to AO3.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently Alan Wake and Control. In the past, I've written for Hades, World of Warcraft, Overwatch, Star Wars, Dragon Age, Mass Effect, just to name the big ones.

4. Top five fics by kudos

The Coming of Butterflies - Zagreus/Thanatos, a Hades fic

Out of My Hands and Into Your Heart - Alan Wake/Fictional Alex Casey, an Alan Wake fic

Sometime Around Midnight - Majima/Makoto, a Yakuza 0 fic

The Water - Reaper76, an Overwatch fic

What We Leave Behind - Hanzo/the Cowboy, Overwatch fic

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes. I try to reply to every comment because I really appreciate people taking the time to leave them. It's easy to just read a fic and drop a kudos. It takes more time to think of something to say.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Well, Out of My Hands is a tragedy, so I think that qualifies as angstiest. However, I think several of my Trench/Darling fics are angsty given the nature of the pairing.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The Runaway Rabbit had a very uplifting ending, for being a sex pollen fic.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not in recent years, but I've received 2 hate comments in the past.

9. Do you write smut?

Yep. E rated fics are my most common on my profile!

10. Craziest crossover?

I'm not a fan of crossovers, but I have some ideas being cooked up for my third installment of my Fictional CaseyWake story that are crossover-esque.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Thankfully not, I'd be extremely angry if that happened.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, I've had a few translated, namely The Coming of Butterflies.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, I've written several fics with @rangerzath. From OCs and beyond, we've written a lot together. We've recently started collaborating on comics, which has been a lot of fun!

14. All time favourite ship?

Trench/Darling

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't know about doubting. I don't want to close the door on anything. I want to get back to Days of Thunder and Forever and Always someday!

16. What are your writing strengths?

I like to think I write characters in character really well, like I capture their voices accurately. So dialogue, then.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing stories. Not becoming discouraged. Staying motivated. Resisting the urge to publish prematurely. Descriptions take a lot of time and thought. I try not to be repetitive, too, so it requires needing to get extra creative for said descriptions.

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I think there's a time and place for it.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

If we're talking about the original... then Inuyasha lol.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Out of My Hands and Into Your Heart. I tried my best to write a story detailing Alan's life before Bright Falls, his struggles, his moments of joy. I really just wanted to explore what could have led to Alan killing off Casey in The Sudden Stop. I wanted to explore the Writer's Journey(TM) and all the victories and setbacks creatives experience, because that vicious cycle is very much at the heart of Alan Wake as a series. I think I'll always be proud of it for what it accomplished, and I'm very pleased it's a finished story under my belt too. I'll tag @rangerzath @pintsizeninja @pinkomcranger @hearts-are-connected and @star-spangled-bastard (if you've been tagged already, sorry for the spam!)❤️

[luvo27]

for the fanfic game (sorry if it's too late, ignore me!) 16, 28? :D

castles it is NEVER too late to give me an excuse to ramble on about my fics!!!!

16. word or phrase i think I use a lot: probably anything to do with breathing. i'm a sucker for a "breathe in, breathe out," or anything along those lines!! drawing attention to a character's breathing feels like, an anatomical comma in the way that it makes you pause for a moment and also in how i probably overuse it!!

28. oh man i answered this one in terms of dc fic, where I ended up going with the first fic I wrote a character as explicitly aromantic in - you might see where I'm going with this.

On Haunting vs. Being Haunted was supposed to be a maybe 1-2k singular scene of an open ended-messed-up baron and riz interaction and then I accidentally started with writing the scene where riz talks to fabian about the briefcase first on the blank doc and then I started writing the scene where Riz tells Sklonda that he's dating Baron (i write so out of order. i often write like, only the dialogue of the middle of several different scenes out of order and then reorder them and finish writing them.) Then I got maybe 5k or so into it and realized I wanted it to have a happy ending. But see, at the time, if I were asked, I probably would only have said I was queer, and only that I was aspec if I was feeling courageous, so as I was figuring out the ending, I had no idea what Sklonda could possibly say to Riz that would feel true - how could I assuage the fears of a fictional character if I could not do the same for my own? and then i thought about the friends that I'd made in the last couple of years. I actually messaged one of them as I was writing to say that their friendship was what let me write the fic, and that writing the fic was making me question whether or not I wanted to use the aroace labels, and then I posted the fic, and then so. many. people. commented. It is an absolute honor and a privilege to be told that they were able to relate, or feel seen, or just had a good time reading. I hold every story that people felt comfortable enough to share there in my heart. So i was getting those comments, and I was getting comments on the dc fic i mentioned before, and the sequel to haunting wasn't originally planned to have a riz epilogue, but it turned out there was more I wanted to say! There's so little representation of asexual characters in media, and not a lot in fanfic, even less of aromantic characters in most media, and even less in fanfic, and even more so for aromantic characters who do not want qprs or something that might look like one, and it is hard to imagine a happy ending is possible if you never see it realized! again, it's genuinely been one of the most special things in my life that I was able to give people this story, happy ending included, and hear their stories in response. rizs internal monologue at the end of stress vs love started as like, an imaginary open letter to everyone who read on haunting, but most importantly, to myself. I am aroace, and I do not have to be afraid forever :))

castles, thank you so much for letting me ramble on about this. i've thought about sharing this personal little behind the scenes a lot and I'm so happy to finally do so because this story and the response to it really means so much to me!!!

[nouklea]

Fic Tag Game!

I was tagged by @beri-allen, @writerrose1998, @cosmic-lullaby and @wileyonce. Thanks! <3

20 questions below the cut:

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

16

2. What’s your AO3 word count?

136,228

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Wednesday for now. I used to write for StarWars (see question 12) but no traces remains from that era.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Woe of Wrath

I'm on my Way

Variations on a Main Theme - 1

A Second Chance for a First Impression

Five Minutes Earlier

5. Do you respond to comments?

As much as possible. Usually I respond to every comment, even if it's just to say a quick Thank You. The only fic on which I haven't done that is Woe of Wrath, if fell into limbo and I have a hard time focusing on it right now. And I feel kind of weird to answer comments after several months of silence, but the more I wait the weirder it gets...

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Doomed is a Dead Dove Do Not Eat fic. The entire text is dark, including the ending.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I will go with Double-Date With Dad. Farewell Xavier Thorpe ends on a really good note too (if you are not a fan of Xavier).

8. Do you get hate on fics?

It never happened. Fingers crossed.

9. Do you write smut? What kind?

I try. I find it difficult for two reasons. First, it's tough to avoid clichés. When you read smut, you end up noticing some general patterns, and I do my best to stay away from those. Second, I'm not a fan of some popular kinks, for instance I can't stand the expression "good girl", and therefore I'm not interested in writing it, even if I keep reading authors that use them. Some people probably think my smut fics are boring, too soft, too ordinary. But I don't care (yeah, I do, but shh).

10. Do you write cross-overs?

No. And I have a really hard time reading cross-overs too. And I hate cross-overs in tv shows. Complete respect to authors, however. It's just not my thing.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I guess I could translate my own fics in French since it's my native language, but for now I don't see any reason to do so.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

A long time ago in a galaxy far far away, I did. It was a weird kind of toxic partnership. The other person was responsible for writing the general plot (because my ideas weren't good enough), and I had to turn every page he wrote into a three-pages long section, adding descriptions and filling the blanks. And correct the spelling and grammar, and add better vocabulary...

13. What WIP would you like to finish but doubt you ever will?

I hope I will finish every WIP I currently have, even if they tend to pile up (WIP bunnies...). My biggest challenge is to go back to Woe of Wrath. It is my first fic, it is a multi-chapter one, and I started to write it just to let the steam out after a twenty-years-long writing hiatus, so the outline was not super clear, there are many plot holes I try to fix, the sentences and vocabulary are bad... I know where I want to take the story and how it ends, but it's hard not to want to start over.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

For fanfics I'll say Weyler because it's the only thing I've ever written. Now besides that... For those who read Guy Gavriel Kay, I'm forever bound to the Diarmuid/Sharra ship, followed by Paul/Jaelle. Quite fond of the Clary/Jace ship in The Mortal Instruments (The books! Don't talk to me about the movie or the tv show!)

15. What are your writing strengths?

No damn idea. I've been asking myself the same question since I was thirteen.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Probably not being able to answer question 15. Imposter syndrome.

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

In French it's not a problem, of course. I've done it in Impulsion. I have studied Latin for two years in highschool so I felt comfortable enough to translate a few sentences in Woe of Wrath. For other languages, I would only do so if I can find a beta reader fluent in this specific language to correct the grammar. I cringe everytime I read English fics with badly written French dialogs, it makes me loose the focus on the story (Same for tv shows, by the way. Come on, you have 2 millions $ to produce an episode and you can't find someone to double-check your French sentence?). It's really hard for me not to comment with a correction (AO3 etiquette: do not provide corrections unless the author specifically asked for it). I don't want to inflict that on my readers by butchering their native language.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Star Wars. It was a long time ago (in a galaxy far far away), when there were only three movies and a few books (Timothy Zahn forever!). And for those who wonder how old I am, I used to write with WordPerfect, DOS version (it was the pre-Windows era). It had a blue background (terrible for the eyes) and some keycodes you had to use to change the font to bold or italics. Since you can't visualize anything in DOS (it's not a wysiwyg), it used colors, so you had to remember what it meant (yellow letters meant italics...). And I used to save those texts on a floppy my mom took to her office to print.

19. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

It's not a popular one, but I really like Monologue for a Hyde. I like the tone. Pretty happy with Fuck Me Once Shame on You, Fuck Me Twice Shame on Me, too.

20. What fic would you want to rewrite one day?

Woe of Wrath without a doubt. With a proper plan, and a lot of plot holes avoided (that damn cellphone...)

I will tag the Death Metal and Glitter Club members whose Tumblr ids I know, aka @anotherbluesunday, @tastethesetears, @darling-gemini, @darlingfuego,

As well as @broken-everlark, @persephoneed, @bithablu, @allergictocolor and @insomniac1994.