#i did not use a reference for his hat and it definitely shows

[thimbleb3rries]

Extraordinarily silly

[empty-vessel-of-a-person]

Review Time : Fluffy Treatment

Note: This is my personal take to Zayne's most recent memory. Noting has been confirmed by Infold, so this is just full delulu mode as I dive in to Fluffy Treatment. Spoiler Alert for those who hasn't seen the memory yet.

Infold is really giving Zayne girlies the stablish relationship vibe with Zayne. And the fact that MC again reciprocates Zayne's affection is definitely win for me.

Once again, MC willingly volunteers herself to take care of Zayne and honestly, they become more playful with each other. The stiff and aloof Zayne has becoming more and more accustomed to banters and jokes. He even openly teases MC referring to the whole box of chocolate she ate at his place.

And speaking of her place, remember that pajama set she bought for Zayne in Cozy Afternoon? he is wearing them again at his home. Come to think of it, only Zayne have a pajama set.

And about sleeping and napping, they were sleeping on the same bed/couch again. There is no stopping them being so cozy around each other. Let's also note that feeling each other's warmth is making them relax and sleepy. At the ending of the Fluffy Treatment, lets take in the fact the even if the are both half asleep they are taking care of each other. Zayne is such a gentleman covering them up because the blanket slip on the side.

Zayne is also being territorial with MC (Note: Territorial not Jealous because he knows she belongs to him), he was never rude and he still let her choose what she wanted to do. This was shown when MC wanted to enter the Pet Café. Even though he was clearly upset by wanting to pet another cat, he still doesn't force MC to do what he wants.

When MC reluctantly leave the Pet Café, Zayne wants to make up to her by dressing up as a butler without 2nd thought so MC can both have a Cat and a Butler. This is another heart warming event of them compromising to ensure no hard or ill feelings between them. If they couldn't do one thing, they will surely find a way around it.

Zayne also shows how submissive he is to MC, he did not put a hat when she stops him, he comes with her at the mall even though he is really anxious in going out, he let's her take care of him and most importantly, the way he knelt down to returns MC's shoes. I take this act as a complete surrender.

I have 2 favorite part of this memory. - First, is when he sniff MC a few time and confirms that he have his scent on her and saying "You're all mine!" Gosh it's so hot I almost peed my pants. And after claiming her as his, his tail wraps around her waits. I did a little research and found out that when a cat "Tail Wrapped Around You: Touching you with the tail or wrapping it around you is one way your furry friend expresses affection, relaxation, and love." I lost it! Zayne really is in love with MC and he is saying it by doing thing more than word can say. Oh my gosh, I can't tell you how much I swoon at this. He is friggin hot!!! - 2nd is when he bites and lick MC's finger and tell her that it was his way in showing affection and then!!! MC reciprocates his affection by rubbing his cheeks. His reaction is so overwhelming. We have to remember that he is a cat at that time and his senses are heighted. Try to imagine how Euphotic he must have felt when she rubs his cheeks. His facial expressions is sensational. It seems like his eyes are rolling back.

Once again, Zayne and MC shows us what being equally in love is. It was always give and take for them. Always compromising and always so affectionate towards each other.

Zayne and MC becomes a safe haven for me. They give me happiness. I just hope that in their future memory, we will get to see them lounging in together in the Kindled moments.

[bvidzsoo]

Color of love

The third star of Cosmically divine...

☆ Author: bvidzsoo

☆ Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x female reader

☆ Warning: smut, breeding kink (?), possessiveness, mentions of abuse and enslaving, violence

☆ Word count: 12.3k

☆ Rating: nsfw, mature

☆ Genre: Greek mythology, Hongjoong is Hermes and MC is Iris, fated to be together au

☆ Summary: If there was a God everyone feared, perhaps it was Zeus. After the continuous abuse he's put you through, you never thought you'd get to live your eternal life peacefully. That is, until the messenger God shows up and whisks you away before Zeus can see and stop him.

☆ A/N: Helloo, my lovelies!! ^^ I am back and all fresh to continue my Greek series, memory refreshed of the places that our story takes place at. All villages mentioned in this part are very real places and I decided to use them, since I now know Greek people also read this series, I hope I have done justice with the descriptions and please forgive me if I messed up anything, but I did take some creative liberty (mythology included!) Surprisingly, I don't have much to yap about right now, except that while writing this I derailed a bit from the initial plot I had constructed lmao but it's actually good because it tied everything nicely together. The taglist is still open, so lmk if you want to be added to it. I appreciate all your feedback, so let me know what you thought of Hongjoong's part! ^^ Enjoy, and here's a glossary before you start reading:

★ This is inspired by Greek mythology, but I took creative liberty and adapted it to my likes, so keep that in mind while reading, thank you! ★ Hermes is considered the herald of the gods, but is also a messenger God ★ Iris is the the personification of the rainbow and messenger of the gods, a servant to the Olympians and especially Queen Hera ★ talaria are winged sandals ★ petasos is a wide-brimmed hat with a conical crown worn in ancient Greece ★ Zeus is the god of the sky and is considered the ruler, protector, and father of all gods and humans ★ Hera is the goddess of marriage, family, childbirth, and women, known as the queen of the gods ★ Aphrodite is the Goddess of love, beauty, desire, and all aspects of sexuality ★ Dryad is a tree nymph  ★ Hades is the God of the underworld ★ Selene is the is the goddess and personification of the Moon ★ Helios is the god representing the sun ★ Isis is the goddess of healing and magic ★ Underworld is a distinct realm where an individual goes after death ★ Cerberus often referred to as the hound of Hades, is a multi-headed dog that guards the gates of the Underworld ★ Ano Skotina, Palaioi Poroi, Palaios Panteleimonas are villages in the Olympic Riviera and are situated on the mountain side ★ Dion is a village and municipal unit in the municipality of Dion-Olympos in the Pieria regional unit, Greece; it's known for its sanctuary of Zeus and its ancient city (definitely give it a visit if you're in the area!) ocean divider; greek divider

☆ Taglist: @patchofblue @sthwaaberry @constipatedcorgi @holytidalwavechees3cake @cheolliehugs

@slowitdownmakeitb0uncy @hoeforsungie @skittyneos @mingheol @sebastianswhore13

@astral-trashcan

༄ ҉ Series m.list ༄ ҉ 　★ previous star ★ 

            Alongside the mountain range of Olympus lays more than one beautiful settlement, some so breathtakingly magnificent that one would dare say the Gods themselves have crafted them. It goes without saying that it wasn’t them, but perhaps the humans that have constructed such roads and buildings were momentarily blessed by Hephaestus to wield their instruments the same way he wields his, with the same precision and perfection, building a haven for those who sought a refuge and a place to which they belonged. The lush green mountain range held more than one hidden village from the prying eyes of those wandering through the forest or the inhabitants of the bustling town of Dion, and these small settlements also offered refuge to those who desperately needed one. Right underneath the noses of the Olympian Gods, blessed but also scrutinized and often forgotten about, nobody would’ve thought to look for the two that held so much power in their pale hands, their bodies frail-looking but everlasting. The earthlings of Ano Skotina were unassuming and comprehensive of the two strangers who ran down the cobblestone-covered paths with baited breaths and soaked to the bone by the heavy rain, yet despite the oddness of their appearance and mumbled speeches, the villagers offered the two wandering souls fresh meal, a warm bath, and a house that they could call theirs. It almost felt like a distant memory now, something that happened centuries ago when, in fact, it was merely a few years back, when Zeus’ rage was still fresh and unforgiving as it mercilessly outlashed the mortals that worshipped him so much.

With the disappearance of Iris from Olympus, the Gods felt restless and uncertain, however, no matter how much Zeus scattered them out to search for his beloved seer, no God or Goddess has ever found her. But she was right under their noses, albeit tucked away in a safe place and surrounded by mortals who loved her and worshipped her unknowingly of her real self and status. The tall pinecone trees mixed with those specific to the climate had turned a sharper and more brilliant green compared to their colour before the two strangers decided to settle down in the quiet village, and after every rain, there was a rainbow. The children of the village would giggle and squeal whenever it appeared in the blue sky as they tried to chase its end, leaving a bright smile on my face as I tinkered around my humble abode, waiting for my lover to return.

The villagers of Ano Skotina were pleasant people, and once they warmed up to the newcomers, they included them in every tradition they had, often showering them with goods they didn’t need anymore. Despite looking as human as possible, there was something unearthly about the two newcomers, their auras bright and light, demanding a certain devotion that many in Olympus lacked. It had been hard at first to get used to the kindness and good deeds that seemingly followed every person here, but at last, I learned and realized that not everyone wished ill on their peer, nor did they expect anything in return if they did something for you.

At first, I had felt ungrateful towards their kindness as I found myself unknowing of the customs of the earthlings. Despite being a messenger, I never quite learned their ways and patterns. But they were understanding and chalked it up to me being peculiar, special, and a little different from them and never made me feel excluded when something was new and I didn’t understand the process of it. Hermes was doing better by my side, he accommodated faster, but that was to be expected. He’s been amongst mortals for longer than me, disguising himself as one as it came as second nature to him. Despite the range of our powers, neither Hermes nor I were blessed with the feat of turning ourselves completely human, and thus, I couldn’t help but blame it on a natural wonder and a blessing made by a Goddess when I was just a child that my hair changed its colour every season. During the colder days, it would turn into an ashen brown, slowly turning into a warm caramel colour as the sun returned. When it got so warm that not even the shade of the tall trees could shelter me from the sizzling sunrays, my hair turned a reddish hue, until it faded into a light brown when the leaves started falling once again. The mortals never said anything, never accused me of anything, but it was easy to tell that they knew something was amiss, that it had to do something with the divine. Perhaps that also prompted them to be kinder and gentler towards me, oftentimes noticeable just how squeamish I was around everyone besides my saviour. His name, the one that the mortals so feverishly worshipped, was Hermes, but the one they unassumingly called out as if he were a friend to them was Hongjoong. I, myself, found the later version of his name more comforting, friendlier, and for once not a reminder of everything I had to endure in Olympus at the hands of Zeus.

The night had been serene when we blew out the last candle and made our way to our shared bed, the covers cold until our ghastly bodies warmed them up, hushed whispers and giggles leaving our reddish lips until we became enraptured by the night and the dreams it brought upon once our minds and souls calmed and admitted defeat to the simple feat of exhaustion. Wrapped in the arms of my lover nothing and nobody could hurt me, I knew I was safe and far away from the very God that called himself our father and protector. But there were nights when my dreams were clouded with visions, making my sleep restless and terrifying. Some visions that came to me would be bright and of great news, and some would be foreboding and dark, petrifying.

At first, when the bright moonlight coming through the opened curtains slowly faded into permeating darkness, I thought it must have been the rainclouds covering the beautiful celestial, but with the appearance of the gut-twisting feeling low in my stomach, I knew something was amiss. The house was eerily quiet and I was alone, no longer in the safe and strong arms of my lover. My feet were cold as I carefully left the confines of my bedroom, the floorboards wet and slippery in an uncharacteristic way. Perhaps Hongjoong had visited Poseidon and brought the seawater inside our house, perhaps the rain was so harsh it settled and flooded our house. But the absence of the pitter-patter of the rain against the roof of the cottage was enough to confirm that it wasn’t raining, and with the talaria not in its place, I also knew Hongjoong wasn’t home.

The quiet hiss behind me and the fear spreading through my body warned me that this wasn’t my reality, that I had been sucked into a vision while unconscious. Most of my visions happened when I was asleep, when my mind was at rest and open to receiving whatever the Cosmos wanted to alert me of, but if the situation was dire, I could force myself into a state of consciousness too to see such visions. Rarely, but it’s been happening more often since I have descended into the human realm, I would get snippets of the future if I touched certain objects or even mortals, visions that usually bore good news. And so, without my consciousness stirring me awake to interrupt the vision, I turned to face the hissing animal behind me. A long and dark green snake was slowly slithering towards me, menacing as it opened its mouth and showed its poisonous fangs. A snake couldn’t kill me, I was immortal after all, but it certainly could harm this human body I was forced to inhibit in this realm.

But the ground shook and the sky cleared once again, the scenery different to where my unconscious body lay peacefully in the arms of my lover. The pinecone trees twisted and turned around me, caging me in as the snake came menacingly close, and I raised my head to look at the moon but it was absent. I was deep in the forest, I could hear the hushed whispers of the Dryads, the concern and fear in their voices. The snake rose off the ground and gave one last hiss before it lunged towards me, my legs apparently frozen in place as I couldn’t jump away or even run off. But before it could sink its teeth into my pale and frail skin, an eagle’s scream was loud and warning as it suddenly gripped the snake in its sharp claws and yanked it away from my body, taking it far away as it flew off into the permeating darkness. The Dryads haven’t stopped whispering, and while their mutters remained intangible, they became louder and more urgent. My legs stopped feeling like lead and I took a tentative step in the direction I hoped the cobble path was and would lead me back to the village, but a shadow darker than darkness itself seeped between the trees as if it was mist, encompassing the forest.

There was a scream in the distance and sudden terror gripped at my throat, my body locking up as I stared into the silver orbs that now seemed to be blocking my every-way, watching me almost tauntingly. I couldn’t breathe as my lungs seized, and I clawed at my throat, but the pressure only worsened, my body shaking from fear and the lack of oxygen. My vision became hazy as creepy laughter echoed around me, a terrifyingly familiar voice, a voice that I loathed with my whole being. I was succumbing to the greater force the more seconds ticked by, but before my eyes could roll to the back of my mind and allow my body to crumble to the cold floor of the forest, a face so clear it managed to make me gasp appeared in front of my face.

The man’s face was simply gorgeous, tanned from the sun and defined at the jaw with a nose that few bore around these parts. His eyes were uneven but sharp, and his pretty lips formed a word I couldn’t understand just yet. My ears were ringing louder than the person’s words, but the more my eyes bore into the stranger’s terrified ones, the clearer everything once again became.

“Run!” His shrill voice was raspy as I was forcefully shoved back and I stumbled for a moment until I regained my bearings.

I could move, I could hear, I could feel.

My body trembled as that familiar cackle echoed around me once again, and I realized the gorgeous stranger was one of the Dryads who whispered in the trees. He looked more scared than I had ever felt, and with a hand reaching out for him desperately to pull him with myself, my feet kicked off before the cold darkness could touch my skin.

And then, as quickly as it came, the vision was gone. I was shaken awake by the frantic calls of my name and warm hands that gripped my arms with tremors. “Y/N! My beloved, please, Y/N. Iris, please, wake up!”

My eyes slowly fluttered open and I realized the curtains were still drawn apart to allow the moonlight inside, to honour Selene and perhaps greet her when she passed on the sky with her chariot. Even if one could hide from Zeus, Selene and Helios saw and knew everything. But my vision was soon obscured by two bright eyes, an amber nobody else I knew had as they shook in fright and bore into mine, searching for anything wrong. My body felt tense and my throat a little parched, but other than that, I was alright. I knew I had been dreaming, I knew a vision came to me, but everything felt wrong. There was something just not right about the vision, about the way it occurred, about the man that showed itself to me. It took me a few seconds to register everything I had seen, and soon, my eyes were just as glazed over with fear as Hongjoong’s. I shot up and cradled my knees to my chest as Hongjoong settled down behind me, reluctant to touch me as he exhaled shakily.

“My beloved, what is the matter?” He questioned quietly, his voice pained, “I cannot help if you don’t talk to me. Was it another night terror, Iris?”

I gulped and my arms tightened around my legs a little bit more, “A vision, Hermes, an omen. Something bad is about to happen, he’s coming for me.”

There was rustling behind me and then I felt the press of a firm chest against my back, strong arms wrapping around my middle to pull me back into the warm body of my lover. I sighed, but my muscles remained tense as I tried to shake away the lingering feelings of the vision. Somebody was out there to get me. Somebody sent by Zeus, once again, and they were close, too close for comfort. The snake almost managed to touch me, perhaps it represented the mortal or traitor, even, that Zeus had sent. I wouldn’t put it past him to send the dirtiest of those that he had once cast away to bring me back to him so that he could enslave me once again.

“Nothing bad will happen, Y/N,” Hongjoong whispered as his chin came to rest on my shoulder. He turned his head and his soft brown hair tickled my cheek in the process, “You are with me and I will do everything to keep you safe, I have promised. No, I have sworn on my immortality, I’ll never let him find you, my beloved.”

Hongjoong’s tone was soft and tender as his fingers gripped my sheer nightgown tightly, pressing his front to the back of my body as tightly as he could, his hot lips brushing against my ear almost teasingly. I gulped, remembering the fear in the Dryad’s eyes too vividly, it had felt too real. I couldn’t even tell if he was part of the vision or if he had managed to cause a rift in the Cosmos to consciously warn me of the danger that was now closer than ever before. We’ve managed to stay hidden for so long, the fear of losing my freedom again was all-consuming and terrifying.

“The Dryad was terrified,” I whispered as my eyes coated over with the remnants of the vision, hard to erase such a look from my mind, “I don’t even think he was part of my vision. There was an eagle too in my dream, Hongjoong.”

My lover’s gulp was audible and I turned my face to face his, prompting Hongjoong to lean back just a bit so that we could stare into each other’s eyes. Suddenly, a soft smile graced his lips and my heartbeat picked up just a little bit, my tense muscles finally easing and letting me become putty in Hongjoong’s comforting embrace.

“He won’t touch you.” There was a menace in his tone, warning and promising of pain, his eyes glazed over with fire for a second, memories taking him away from me, but Hongjoong quickly returned as his eyes cleared, tone more passionate than before, “If there’s anyone that can keep you captive, then that’s me because I’ll forever treat you with respect and love, care and tenderness. I’ll be your slave if that’s what you want me to be, I’ll prove to you again and again how devoted I am, I’ll treat you like a Queen if that’s who you want to be, Y/N. But most of all, I’ll run until the end of Earth for you if that means I can keep you safe, I’ll run and never stop. I’ll never step foot into Olympus ever again if that keeps you safe from those tyrants.”

“Don’t say that.” I whispered as Hongjoong’s left arm untangled from around my torso so that he could cup my cheek, “With me gone, it’s already hard for everyone to keep up. I’m making you do all the work by yourself, it’s unfair. If you’ll be gone too, I fear our fates will be dire once we are discovered.”

“I know more than he’ll ever know, Y/N, I carry all secrets and strategies. If he tries to separate us or threatens to turn us into stars, I’ll know how to corner him.” A smirk that would frighten any mortal crossed Hongjoong’s lips, “And I will threaten to throw him off if he doesn’t back off.”

I knew no matter what I said to my lover his resolve wouldn’t break, it was of no use trying to convince Hongjoong that if he went against Zeus he most certainly would perish. No matter how much you knew, not even his own weaknesses could stop the God, he was the father of us all after all, and Hongjoong was merely a deity that had more power and free will than those unlucky like me.

“I love you.” The confession bubbled past my quivering lips, and I watched Hongjoong’s Adam's Apple bob up and down as he swallowed, eyes darkening with want and fire that was perfectly reflected in his amber irises. Our human bodies were more fragile than our godly forms, they felt everything so much deeper, so much more passionately. I couldn’t help but succumb to the fire that licked at my skin as our warm lips pressed together, hungry and never satiated with the other as Hongjoong gently grabbed my hips and manoeuvred me around until I was sat atop him. Our lips smacked together with a languid pace and our teeth clumsily clanked together whenever one of us bit the other’s bottom lip eagerly, my long fingers finding purchase in Hongjoong’s wavy strands as his calloused hands guided my core over his clothed member. The soft fabric of his sleepwear was thin and hid nothing as he grunted at the first drag of my hips forward and back, making me eagerly swallow the sounds he was making. One warm hand settled on my thigh, underneath my nightgown, and slowly bunched up the fabric until it rested just above my hips.

Desire licked at my insides as hotness spread through my body, cheeks flushed as Hongjoong’s hands traced invisible patterns into my skin, his touch leaving a trail of goosebumps as they slowly slithered towards my lower back, digging into my flesh. I sighed against his mouth before pulling back to tilt his head back and press kisses against his well-defined jaw, the moonlight making his appearance godlier than he ever was in his deity form. I moaned against his simmering skin as his nails dug into the flesh of my bottom, heat pooling in my lower stomach as he pressed me down just harder on his clothed member, drawing out a moan from both of us as my bare core ground right on top of it. The wetness between my legs only became more prominent and I bit into the flesh of his neck, making Hongjoong’s head fall back as he breathed through his mouth loudly, a whine falling past them every time I sucked a little harder, every time I let him drag my core over his hard member, hot despite the fabric separating us.

“I love you.” He gasped into the silence as his hands settled on my thighs again, my hips moving on their own as the friction had started feeling too good to stop, leaving a dark patch on his light-coloured trousers, which mixed with his own precum. I pressed a long kiss against his lips as I fiddled with the hem of his trousers and hastily pulled them down, freeing his member as I eagerly aligned myself up with it, our eyes meeting before I sunk on it. Hongjoong’s grip tightened on my thighs and he whimpered as I hugged him close to my body, fingers tangling into his hair once again, offering an anchor as my walls clamped down on his length. Hongjoong was safe, home was where he was, and I never wished to be anywhere else but in his arms. He saw past my gift and looked at my soul, he appreciated me and worshipped me for who I truly was and not for why everyone seemed to want me. Just a seer, a lowly deity that was able to glance into the future and sometimes the present. Hongjoong never demanded of me to look into his future, to spy on a vision for him, he only asked me to love him back. But he didn’t have to ask, I had always known if there was any mortal or deity I could love, it was him.

The muscles of my thighs tensed as I tentatively rose before sinking back down on his dick, making Hongjoong groan as he leaned back to support himself with one hand, bracing my hip with his other as he gently guided me. I let my hands rest on his shoulders as he snapped his hips upwards and ripped a moan out of me, making me meet his thrusts eagerly as our movements synced up, the slapping sounds became louder and louder in the confinement of our bedroom as we both lost each other to the feeling of overwhelming lust and love, the desire to possess and be possessed, to belong to someone, to love and be loved.

            But life had not always been like this. For centuries and centuries, it hadn’t been like this but full of torment, pain, and demands that seemingly never came to an end. Everyone always wanted something from me, they always took and took, but they never gave back anything. I understood my role in the Cosmos, and as the bearer of messages between the mortals and Gods, I knew I had to be flexible and report whenever I was needed. I had to prioritize my purpose and place everyone above myself, it’s just how nature worked. And it had been alright, I felt most fulfilled when I was doing what my calling was, when I was guiding Gods and mortals alike, stringing them onto the right path headed towards a bright future. But I was naïve and careless, I hadn’t realized that once the knowledge of the full extent of my powers fell into the wrong hands it would be exploited, that it would turn against me and hurt me in the process. Glancing into the future, predicting silly things like the weather, and warning mortals of floods or wildfires soon turned into commands and demands of looking into the fate of a disobeying God or Goddess, into spying on those that dared turn against Zeus, of migraine after migraine when I was at my wit's end, begging to be left alone to recharge and step away from the visions.

Zeus was unforgiving and violent, greedy and desperate to control everything and everyone around him. When the word of me being a seer got to him, my freedom was stripped and I never saw the sunlight unless I had orders to deliver a message. My visions became constant because I just had to do what he told me if I didn’t want to turn into a star, and my body and mind were exhausted. I couldn’t sleep, sometimes I would get stuck in a vision for weeks on end, unable to break free, becoming a prisoner of my own mind. It was terrifying and excruciatingly painful; I couldn’t tell whether I was still alive or not. It was silly, a deity never dies as long as it has worshippers, but my soul felt so tired I wished all mortals would drop dead so that my existence would cease too.

Zeus hid me away from everyone, he lied to Hera that I decided to reside on a secluded island down amongst the humans and wished not to be spoken to or reached out to unless the message was time-bound and very important. I had been an important messenger of Hera, and my heart broke when I felt her trust and respect in me vane, but what hurt, even more, was that she never questioned her lover, that she never actually tried to look for me and see if the God was indeed saying the truth. What hurt the most, even in my deity form, was that nobody actually cared enough about me to come and rescue me from the terrorizing clutches of Zeus, that nobody loved and respected me to save me from the torment I had to go through for centuries on end. Everything hurt, even speaking and sleeping, I was nothing but a shell of what I once used to be. Zeus never cared, he just wanted the visions, he threw me around until the physical pain became so unbearable that I just had to scavenge my mind for even a trace of a vision. I became scared of my own power, of what he’d to do me if I didn’t learn how to control it better.

And then one night, or day I couldn’t tell, as I lay exhausted on the cold marble floor of the room Zeus had imprisoned me into, there was a whoosh of a breeze inside and the shatter of a vase. I had no idea what’s happened, I couldn’t see quite right and my head was pounding, covering everything in an unclear haze. But something metallic was hurled underneath my long fingers and when my index finger curiously poked against it a vision so sudden and harsh that it knocked the wind out of my lungs clouded my eyes with flashes of a handsome and somewhat familiar face, smile mischievous yet menacing, his amber eyes ablaze and raging. I had known of him, of course, I have, but we’ve never quite crossed paths, so it was bizarre to get a vision so suddenly of Hermes. It wasn’t even Zeus asking me to look into him, I wasn’t even forcing my mind and soul to connect with it, it just came by itself. Tears flooded my unseeing eyes at the feeling and I tried not to sob upon realizing that my soul was still somewhat aligned with the Cosmos despite how much I’ve forced myself to see and hear everything, having broken the order of the Universe.

And the vision of Hermes persisted for months on end, until, the marble door separating me from freedom was blown into bits and pieces and the God rushed inside with flushed cheeks and a ragged breath. He said nothing as he scooped me up in his arms, lips hot as they pressed against my cold forehead, and for the first time since my existence, my heart started beating in an uneven pattern, fingers digging into the silky fabric of his shirt as I begged him to save me. Hermes looked angry, but not at me, he looked at me with pity in his eyes but said nothing as he broke the glass of the window with the heel of his foot. I couldn’t remember much as I lost consciousness after that, but I felt the wind blow around us harshly as we fell freely, descending into a realm that was familiar yet new, a cocoon of lush green trees and springs that were clearer than the sky and sun hotter than the rays in Olympus, a place that soon became our new home.

The paths leading down the mountain range were soon after our arrival covered in cobblestones, creating an easy and clear passage for the villagers of Ano Skotina, Palaioi Poroi and Palaios Panteleimonas down to Dion, which resided at the foothill of Mount Olympus. The villagers had put in hard work once Hermes brought up his idea, and with his help, it only took the men a few weeks to construct the paths and connect the otherwise strenuous trek for the villagers if they wished to travel between the settlements. But with our arrival it seemed that the fauna and flora flourished more than before, the villagers became livelier and eagerly awaited the appearance of a rainbow which hadn’t been spotted in ages by the mortals.

Having been saved from the clutches of Zeus, I was finally regaining myself. Hongjoong stood by my side every single step of the journey and he offered a helping hand when it all became too much and too exhausting. He hid me away from all the deities and promised to settle down in a village where Zeus would never find us. We couldn’t go far from Olympus as he still had to fulfil his duties, but with me gone, Zeus had no insight into anyone, he wouldn’t know who had stolen his slave away from him.

But even if we were hiding in plain sight, we’d never be safe from him.

            On the days that the Gods and Goddesses were too busy bickering with each other, forgetting all about their worshippers, the sky seemed to be clearer and a lighter blue. On days like that it was safe for me to leave the confines of Ano Skotina and hike down to Dion with Hongjoong. I loved days like this because as much as I was scared of Zeus finding us, I loved the loudness of the bustling town, the liveliness and eagerness on the faces of mortals, and most importantly, I loved the market where we could trade fresh flowers and fruits. If the weather deemed good and the deities remained preoccupied with their selfish deeds, Hongjoong and I would follow the path down to the sea and dip in the warm but refreshing water. Poseidon wasn’t always around, busy with his errands, so, it was safe to explore the beautiful sea in his absence.

Given our origins, it took Hongjoong and me around an hour to descend from the mountainside down into the town, our talaria polished and well-kept. We hid them in Hongjoong’s satchel as soon as we neared the closest settlement to avoid being discovered by the humans. Sneaking around always brought a little sense of excitement, of my blood boiling hotter and my heart pumping faster, only heightened when Hongjoong would playfully chase me down the cobblestone-covered paths inside of Dion, heads turning our way as they watched on curiously. There wasn’t a day where boredom could threaten to kidnap me if Hongjoong was around, he’s had plenty of time to observe the earthlings and find out what would be amusing and help the time pass by faster. Not that I wished for that to happen, I cherished every second I spent next to Hongjoong, clinging to him despite our unlimited time.

Being with him had always felt right, from the very moment he lifted me in his arms to save me from Zeus. There was something about his eyes that assured me that we were right for each other, that it was written in the stars, that my suffering for so long wasn’t fruitless. He had known he had to save me when he accidentally caught a glimpse of me through the barely open door of my cell-like room, Zeus’ voice booming as he demanded a vision from me before he could send Hermes on his way to deliver his message. He had returned just days later and snuck inside my room to assess the situation, accidentally knocked over a vase when he heard someone approach the door, then fled through the open window. He couldn’t return for months; Zeus was suspicious of him and he was scared if he was caught we’d both perish. But he remained vigilant and at last came back for me.

I made sure to remain close to Hongjoong’s side as the market was packed with more people than usual this afternoon, our pinkies reaching out for each other whenever the other strayed closer. He was discussing something I couldn’t hear with a blacksmith, wondering whether he had more metal to trade with him as my attention remained on the flower stall and the lovely old lady who always had the brightest smile on her face. Her grey strands were beautiful and highlighted her age nicely, and despite her late age, her demeanour was just as youthful as a child’s.

When our eyes met, she beckoned me over with a happy look on her face. Casting Hongjoong a quick glance to make sure he hadn’t moved away yet, I made my way over to the vendor and bowed my head in greetings, “My dear! I haven’t seen you in too long, I was worried about you.”

“My apologies for worrying you, kind soul, I haven’t been able to leave my village.” I kept my answer as vague as possible as her eyebrows furrowed in slight worry. Lately, the deities were busy watching over their desperate worshippers so I couldn’t risk my safety and cover.

“That boy of yours isn’t keeping you captive, is he?” Her eyes narrowed as my cheeks flushed and I quickly shook my head, not keen on her choice of words. I hated hearing anything that had a connection to captivity, and just the thought of Hongjoong keeping me as his prisoner was disgusting and infuriating.

“He would never,” My voice was harsher than intended, “He cherishes me more than anyone ever has.”

“Good, good.” The vendor muttered as her features relaxed once again, “Would you like some pomegranates? I traded them just this morning, I hear they’ve been blessed by Aphrodite herself. Perhaps they’ll make me look youthful once again.”

The old lady giggled as she grabbed the fruit and extended her hand towards me, making my muscles tense at the mention of the deity. If it truly had been blessed by the Goddess I didn’t want to touch it, let alone eat it. She hadn’t been the kindest to me in our years of knowing each other, and despite knowing that Zeus held me in a chamber as his slave, she never said anything to anyone.

“Thank you, but I must refuse you. I do not have anything to trade it with.”  The vendor shrugged and put the fruit away, her fingers grazing against the petals of a sunflower. My eyes followed the action and I yearned to do the same, the yellowness of the flower reminded me of my own rainbow’s colour. It had been a while since I had brought upon the earth a rainbow, I missed its beauty and comforting colours.

“Your scarf seems to be made of silk,” The old lady hummed as she eyed me curiously, “I’ll give you a bouquet of sunflowers if you trade it with me, I know they are your favourite flowers.”

I gulped and gripped the scarf, pondering whether it was worth trading something of high value with something that had little value. But the piece of fabric held no sentimental value to me and autumn would be soon approaching, the old lady needed the scarf more than I did for her body was weaker than mine will ever be. And she was right, I did love sunflowers, it’s been too long since I could hold them in my hands, so, I nodded and untied the scarf from around my neck.

“You’ll seriously trade that beautiful piece for sunflowers?” The vendor next to the old lady asked with scepticism, a dark-haired woman with bushy eyebrows and greediness that wasn’t missed by the mortals either. The old lady ignored her as she tied a big bouquet together for me, happy to trade them.

“I can find many more scarves like this one, but summer is soon ending and I’ll have to wait a long time until sunflowers bloom again,” I answered with a soft smile and took the flowers after I handed over my scarf. The old lady took her time to examine it carefully and I glanced behind myself to see where Hongjoong was. He had moved on to another stall and he was surrounded by several men now as they conversed animatedly, his face bright under the sunlight and amber eyes glinting with interest.

“You have such little value for your possessions.” The other vendor grumbled, and the old lady laughed as she shook her head at the younger woman. I said nothing as I cradled the bouquet against my chest, looking down at the flowers to examine them. Its petals were soft between my fingertips and I took note that its hue was much more vibrant than the colour in my own rainbow, perhaps I could make mine more prominent too.

“The only possession I want to have is over my beloved, nothing else matters to me.”

“Oh, to be young and completely enraptured with a man.” The old lady mused with a knowing look on her face once I looked up at her, my cheeks dusted pink as I realized I had spoken my mind too freely, “I haven’t seen a pair as devoted as you two are to each other.”

“There must be some, I cannot imagine not loving with your whole soul and being—”

“Love is just a fairytale the deities made up to wrangle us around by the nose and manipulate us into doing whatever they want.” The other vendor lady snapped as she interrupted me, and my eyebrows furrowed at her harsh words. Certainly, if any deity were to hear her, her place in the Underworld would be assured and arranged to be painful. The old lady hissed and gave the other vendor an irritated look.

“Quit being so pessimistic, especially to such a young soul.” Before the other vendor could say anything else, the old lady faced me with a curious look, “You must be coming tonight to the offering, right? Zeus will bless you and then you will never part from your lover, he’s great like that.”

Zeus was anything but great, but I didn’t want to ruin the lady’s image of the deity. If I were a maiden praying to Zeus to watch over my lover, he’d rather take me as his lover than offer us his protection. Zeus was horrible like that. But the thought of him made me shiver and I tried to ignore my tensing muscles. I had no idea it was already that time of the month, Hongjoong must’ve forgotten too, otherwise, we would’ve never come down to Dion today of all days.

“I’m afraid I won’t be joining you tonight, I haven’t been feeling well these past few days.” A curious look crossed both of the ladies' eyes and I gulped nervously as I started feeling jittery. I realized I had conversed with them for too long and it was time I returned to the safety of Hongjoong, where nobody would bother me anymore or ask questions.

“You must be with child, then.” The younger vendor declared and my eyebrows furrowed as I cast a glance at her. I most certainly wasn’t with child, I would’ve felt it, but if that lie helped stop more curious questions, then I would take it.

“I am not sure, but perhaps I am,” I answered and the old lady gasped, eyes falling to my belly.

“That is great news, indeed! May the child have your peculiar hair colour and his father’s beautiful eyes.” She wished earnestly and I smiled, feeling just a little bit guilty that Hongjoong and I weren’t actually expecting a child anytime soon. But I blinked my eyes faster and looked down abashed, resisting the urge to shuffle my feet. Deciding that I should return to my lover’s side now, I bid the two vendors my sincerest goodbyes and turned around to search the crowd for Hongjoong. He was a couple of steps away, doing the same, and his eyes lit up when they found me. He had a wide grin on his lips and he waved his fingers playfully as he took off towards me, his steps bouncy and giddy. I chuckled and stopped to let him reach me first, but as I did so, a child narrowly avoided colliding with me as his warm skin brushed against my hand.

The sudden change of scenery managed to knock the wind from my lungs as I gasped and looked around, the market was eerily empty and the sun was hidden behind clouds as suddenly it started becoming darker and darker outside. White mist left my lips as I breathed through my mouth loudly, the temperature having severely dropped made me shiver in my summer gown, head whipping around as I searched for another living soul. But there was no one, not even Hongjoong, and I clenched my palms into fists when I heard the hauntingly familiar cackle once again. The Dryads weren’t here whispering again and I wondered if I’d see the young man once again, if he’d come to warn me again. But nothing happened until an eagle screamed in the distance and then a dark shadow appeared just by the entrance to the market. Its features were unrecognizable, but it towered over the gate as its silver orbs vibrated, looking wildly my way. I gasped and tried to take steps backwards, but I was trapped once again. I felt warm hands touching my arms, a muffled voice worriedly calling my name and something wet pressing against my cheek. The darkness persisted, however, and the shadow cackled once again as the eagle screamed and was suddenly plummeting down towards me, sharp claws drawn and beak parting. But before it could touch me, rip me apart, my eyes flew open.

The loudness of the market made my head thump in pain and I realized I was clutching onto Hongjoong’s shirt tightly as I tried to regain my breathing. My eyes searched to crowd frantically for the shadow, but also to make sure nobody saw my episode. Hongjoong’s arms were warm and slightly trembling as they pulled me into a tight embrace, his lips pressing against my temple as he sighed loudly, “You’re alright, I got you. Let’s head back home, my beloved.”

I nodded wordlessly as Hongjoong took my hand in his and manoeuvred us around the crowd, making sure nobody familiar ran into us so that we’d be able to leave faster. I appreciated his attentiveness as I followed after him, my fingers tightening against his as the crowd was slowly vanning out the closer we reached the end of the town. His features softened once he slowed down to let me fall in step with him, and I raised our joined hands to press a kiss against his hand, “Thank you.”

He said nothing but his amber eyes turned warmer as red swirled behind his irises, his wavy brown hair falling into his eyes and making him look boyish. I chuckled and pressed up on my tiptoes to steal a kiss from Hongjoong, making his eyes widen as a man had just passed us on his horse, his lips widening into an amused smile at our display of affection. I knew my lover was blushing red when he turned his head away, but he squeezed my hand once to let me know he appreciated the gesture, “I saw him again, the shadow, the darkness, the eagle. You know it’s Zeu—”

“Do not speak his name.” Hongjoong cut me off roughly, all previous warmth gone from his features as he faced me abruptly, “Don’t say it, Y/N, I hate it when you do. I hate him, and everything he’s done to you. You are safe with me and nothing will happen to you, I have sworn and I will keep swearing.”

“I know,” I muttered, gulping nervously as I averted my eyes, “but the visions never lie, my love, he’s close, I am not safe anymore.”

I tried not to yelp when suddenly two warm palms cradled my cheeks and yanked me close to Hongjoong’s face, his ablaze eyes boring into mine with fury and determination, “You are mine and if anyone, mortal or deity, touches you, I will burn them until nothing’s left of them. You have suffered enough, I will not let anyone take advantage of you ever again, Iris, it’s over.”

My eyes fluttered closed as my heart thumped wildly, and I leaned forward to press a lasting kiss against Hongjoong’s lips, who pressed his body incredibly close to mine, “You wear my petasos, my beloved, everyone knows you’re mine. Everyone knows what will happen to them if they try to claim you, I won’t allow it anymore.”

His voice was deeper as he spoke up once our lips weren’t pressing against each other and I licked my lips as I nodded, smoothing out the creases between his eyebrows. A silly thought came to mind as Hongjoong’s eyes searched my face and I chuckled as I leaned so close my lips brushed against his when I spoke again, “The vendor ladies think I am with child.”

Hongjoong’s breath stuttered and his pupils dilated as one of his hands grabbed my hips, pressing my body painfully so into his, “Perhaps you should be with child, my beloved.”

“Do you want that?” I asked in a whisper, throat feeling dry as I tried to ignore the fire spreading through my body. This greedy little human body could be so lustful.

“Yes, I want you full of my seed and belly round and pretty.” Hongjoong’s voice was deep as he answered and I had to take a second to compose myself, trying to be the bigger person right now. It wouldn’t be the first time things got a little bit out of hand while we were in public, and I didn’t want something as mortifying to happen again. Last time we were lucky the unfortunate soul who saw us in a scandalous predicament had been an older lady and her husband, both understanding and giggling as they rushed away from the scene. Truthfully, we could’ve picked a more secluded spot and the back of a bar that was often frequented.

“We’re being indecent, Hongjoong.”

“Then let me take you home and show you just how much I want you to carry our child.”

“Hongjoong.”

            One of us had to attend the offering, it was inevitable, and since nobody knew of my location but with Hermes still around, it wasn’t a question that it would be him who would descent to Dion tonight and bring a small flower crown made from my sunflowers and the neighbour’s weeds as his own offering. As a deity, we didn’t have to attend such worshipping customs, but since we were disguising ourselves as mortals it would look suspicious if we didn’t tag along from time to time. I never showed my face around when they were bringing offerings to Zeus as he often liked to disguise himself and come down, watch his loyal followers, and even take maidens to bed and spread his bloodline, but when they would show gratitude for Isis, I made sure to tag along. A deity recognized a deity even in disguise, and despite her catching me at her altar more than once, she never said anything. She could feel my pain, she could see past my smile and looked into my battered soul. She was sensitive and kind, instead of bringing me to Zeus, she blessed me and healed my wounds so that nothing could hurt me so horrendously ever again.

Once we had gotten back from Dion, Hongjoong was busy showing me just how much he really wanted me to carry our child, very reluctant to leave the bed to get ready for the night. I knew he didn’t want to go, he knew I didn’t want to be left alone tonight out of all nights, but we also both knew that we did not have a choice. Deities rarely had a choice, the greater good just always seemed to call out to us. But still, I helped him bathe and dress up, I cooked him a warm dinner and braided little strands of his soft hair while he was busy chiselling his talaria, his petasos already pristine, the leather smelling fresh and feeling soft under the skin.

“Are you certain I must go?” Hongjoong asked with a sigh once he was done with his talaria, eyebrows furrowed as he looked up at me. I ran my fingers through his hair and ruffled the strands that fell into his eyes.

“Yes, my love, you must.” I hummed quietly and Hongjoong sighed long, “We hadn’t attended the offerings in a while, the townsfolk will get suspicious of us at this rate and I quite like this place.”

“I like it here too, it’s serene.” He hummed absentmindedly and I stepped back to let him wear his winged sandals, raising to his feet to test out their agility. He was fast, as always, in good shape and ready to tackle the night’s challenges. I smiled at him proudly as he came to stand in front of me, hands settling on my hips as he licked his lips and looked down at my mouth, “If anything feels wrong, go over to Mr. Do, he will keep you company.”

“I don’t think poor old Mr. Do will be able to tackle a god like Zeus if he shows up,” I said with a chuckle as I circled my arms around Hongjoong’s shoulders, standing on my tiptoes to reach his face better. He chuckled as his eyes searched my face, the amber swirling as fear made its way shown, “I will be alright, Hongjoong, don’t you worry.”

“Of course you will be.” He answered with a scoff as if Zeus showing up was such an impossible feat, “And when I return, I will show you once again just how eager I am to have you with child, to spend the rest of my eternity with you and our son or daughter. I want them to have your kindness and faith, and I want them to have my determination and strength.”

“Aren’t you thinking a bit far ahead, my love?” I asked with a snicker as Hongjoong pouted and shook his head.

“Of course I’m not, my beloved, the seed has been planted, we both felt it.” Hongjoong lowered his face and I watched as his lips parted, “The shift in the Universe has happened, the stars aligned for our love once again, Y/N.”

“We’ve been blessed.” I whispered and tangled my fingers in the hair at his nape, pushing Hongjoong’s face closer to mine, “I am fully yours now.”

“You’ve always been fully mine,” Hongjoong’s voice dropped as his fingers dug into my skin through the fabric of my gown, “only mine.”

I hummed and leaned my head back as his warm lips pressed against mine, instantly eager as they pressed together firmly and forcefully, asking me to part my lips for him. Hongjoong moaned when my tongue dragged against his, coaxing him in deeper as our saliva mixed and tongues brushed together, lighting my skin on fire. My heart pumped faster and my skin jittered, hushed voices and hazy orbs fluttering behind my eyes as a vision threatened to kidnap me from this moment. But I stopped it, I wanted to enjoy the touch of my lover, the sounds of my lover, as I knew the darkness would be back if I were to succumb to the greater force.

Our pace was languid as Hongjoong dragged each kiss out, sucking on my bottom lip before he’d dive right back in, sucking on my tongue too and making me whimper as my hand found an anchor in his nape, holding him as if I were afraid he’d pull back too soon. But he didn’t, he soaked up in the sounds and only kissed me more desperately, pulling back for air when it became too much for our human bodies. I was breathing hard and Hongjoong struggled to even out his pants, our foreheads pressing together as he cleared his throat once and then twice. He licked his lips and then pursed them, fingers twitching as he raised his hands to cup my cheeks, “I wish to return earlier tonight, I’m not done with you yet, Y/N. I have figured if I go earlier and stay for a shorter amount of time it should be fine, Zeus will want me to report back to him so I’ll try to make my journey as fast as possible.”

“I’ll be right here so don’t rush yourself, I don’t want anything to happen to you,” I said worriedly as we untangled from each other, I tried to smooth out the knots I created in Hongjoong’s hair. His outfit remained spotless, the black fabric tight and secure around his strong and well-built body, hugging him snuggly in places that wouldn’t restrict his movement.

“I’m too restless to remain until the end of the festivity either way,” Hongjoong shrugged and kissed my cheek before he went to grab his petasos, “Go to Mr. Do if anything feels even a little bit wrong.”

“I will, I promise.” I smiled reassuringly as my lover headed for the front door, pausing to turn back around with a worrisome look on his face. I knew he was reluctant to go, but he had no choice. One of us had to go and it was him, it was always him, he’d have to report back to Olympus either way and he was right, the quicker he got over with everything, the faster he could return to me. But as soon as the door closed behind me and I was left alone in our safe abode, dark visions clouded my eyes and sent me tumbling to the floor.

            The evening had been harsh to me, the visions seemed to turn only darker as the hours passed by, taunting me. It felt as if I wasn’t in control anymore, as if it was someone else controlling what I saw. My heart pumped fast and my head thumped wildly making my ears ring, and I felt boneless as I tried to stand from the chair I managed to drag myself into. My sight was hazy as I felt around the table for the glass of spring water Hongjoong and I had collected earlier this day, but I failed to reach the cool glass and thus gave up as a harsh wave of nausea almost made me gag. I had never reacted to my abilities so harshly, I couldn’t determine whether it was worrisome or not that my body was having such visceral reactions to the darkness that seemed to linger in the corner of my eyes.

I knew that I was alone in the house and that my visions were tricking me into believing someone was watching me from the shadows, candles unlit as I found the task too strenuous to do with my current state. It all felt too real, it made me scared of how easily my body was succumbing to the terror-filled memories that followed my bodily reactions. It wasn’t the first time my body threatened to shut down, but it’s been far too long since I had felt so sick. It made me remember my captivity and everything I had to endure at Zeus’ hands when he pushed my body over the limit and forced me to become nothing but a vessel that relayed the visions of a seer. I was scared because Hongjoong wasn’t here and because I couldn’t figure out just exactly what was triggering this reaction. All of Isis’ blessings seemed futile all of a sudden, and I found myself wondering whether I could ask the Goddess for guidance and help in dire need, a beckon of light to help me survive until Hongjoong returned and figured out a way to stop my suffering.

But I remembered that Mr. Do was a healer of sorts, a little too old and grumpy, but the villagers loved him and trusted him with their lives countless times before, I have seen it firsthand. Hongjoong and he seemed to have a mutual respect and a deeper understanding of the other’s force that I failed to see and sense. And despite every muscle and joint in my body protesting when I finally pushed myself up into a standing position, I found Hongjoong’s deep trust in the old man a reassuring thought that pushed me to take action and bring myself to the old man’s doorstep, perhaps he knew how to fix this. I had barely reached the front door of my house when my muscles locked up as if they sensed danger, my skin tingling in a way only around another deity it did. But I was alone inside the house, it made no sense, perhaps my seer abilities became uncontrollable and started lashing out in peculiar ways.

I swung the door open, finding the task difficult as my body vehemently tried to disobey my mind’s commands, and despite the haze that clouded my sight, Mr. Do’s small frame not even a few steps away was unmistakable. I hadn’t noticed, but the wind was howling as it bent the weaker branches of trees in odd ways and not one candle was lit inside the neighbouring huts. Cold darkness wrapped around us and I shuddered as it bit at my skin mercilessly, “Mr. Do?”

My voice sounded breathless and pained and my eyebrows furrowed as the older man stepped closer so that I could see him clearly, “Oh, you look sickly, my dear. Let’s head inside.”

I couldn’t find it in myself to object and stepped back inside my house as Mr. Do followed, his height shorter than my lover’s. It seemed to be relatively warmer inside the house, but I still shuddered as I brought the shawl tighter around my shoulders, pressing my nose against the fabric as it smelled like Hongjoong. It brought little comfort, but I relished in it as I willed my sight to clear, at least that little if nothing else seemed to be right with me. Mr. Do seemed curious as his eyes searched the place and I watched him with slight confusion, wondering if it’s been too long since he’d stepped inside our house. But it looked as it always did, the interior hadn’t changed since last week when Hongjoong insisted on having the old man over for dinner as a payment for his kindness after he healed Hongjoong’s broken fingers. It was a freak accident; one he couldn’t heal down here unless he wanted to be caught by the mortals.

“What is bothering you, my dear?” The warm smile felt wrong on Mr. Do’s face, he was someone who never smiled nor showed affection, his face a mask of coldness and uninterest. He never used nicknames and he had never once in his life before directly addressed me. Mr. Do seemed to be afraid to say my name for some reason and he always brought pastries whenever there was a rainbow in the sky, that’s the most emotion he had ever shown. That’s how I knew he didn’t completely mistrust me or hate me. This man standing in front of me was not Mr. Do. But it was too late now, I had already welcomed him inside. I quickly realized that despite his disguise, he couldn’t hide his godly aura, the faint glow around his body or the respect it demanded.

“Why are you here?” Despite my voice being faint, it carried conviction, and braveness, “What do you want?”

“My little seer back.” The man disguised as Mr. Do chuckled and walked further inside the house, walking around as he touched vases and ornaments that clearly belonged to Hermes, “You must understand my utter shock when I found out she was gone. My utter anger and annoyance when I searched for her relentlessly and she was just gone as if swallowed by the earth itself. I assumed it was Hades at first, we know how he likes to play me and taunt me, but when I found him gone from his kingdom and meddling with humans from far away times, I realized something more peculiar had happened.”

I didn’t dare speak up as Zeus walked closer, the face of Mr. Do scrunching up as he tsked, “Imagine my utter confusion and rage when I find out Hermes, my precious messenger and guide, decided to settle amongst the mortals. Not only did I lose my seer, but my messenger too.”

“Hermes never stopped serving you.” My voice was harsh as I willed the bile down my throat and blinked my eyes quickly to try and get rid of the haze, which was very possibly induced by Zeus himself. I understood why my body lashed out like this, it sensed danger and it was warning me. But it was too late now, I had walked myself into Zeus’ trap.

“He didn’t, you are right, little seer, but he also started slacking off.” He scoffed and I gulped as I remained put, my feet frozen to the floor, “You must imagine I assumed he was frolicking with the mortals at first, but then certain inaccuracies just stopped making sense, you see. I have other means of looking into my little deities, Iris, I don’t need you—”

“Then why did you keep me for so long?” My voice raised as my sight finally cleared and I was able to glare at Mr. Do’s serene face, fire and anger replacing my fear as I stared the God down, “If you don’t need me, why did you subject me to so much strenuous work and pain? Why did you force me to seek and seek without break, to bend myself and ruin who I once was?”

“The secret to being a deity is so simple, my little seer,” Zeus’ voice was quiet as he walked even closer, eyebrows slightly furrowed, “We are just like these mortals that worship us, we are greedy and selfish and we take without consideration, we possess and we demand, we punish and we slay, so, what sets us apart from them?”

“Immortality, lack of morals and care of those around us,” I whispered, unable to gulp down the lump in my throat anymore as my heart raced faster, ears starting to ring once again.

“Power, abilities that mortals will never have, is what sets us apart, Iris—or should I call you Y/N, now?” Mr. Do chuckled but his voice sounded distorted. My muscles tensed when his short frame suddenly grew taller, towering over me menacingly, “This is why you are such an insignificant deity to most, you are too soft, you love and want to be loved. You wish to belong to someone and to possess someone, it makes you weak. You act more like a mortal than a Goddess.”

“I never felt like I belonged in Olympus,” My face became hard as my eyes narrowed, unafraid to speak my mind for once. A surge of anger pushed me to speak my mind, to stand up for myself and demand the respect I was never given, “I was always pushed away by my kin, made fun of and ostracized. Your own lovely wife made me a slave of hers, and then you. You look down on me and judge me, but you wish to possess just as much as I do, if not more.”

The God remained silent as his jaw ticked and Mr. Do’s face formed into an unfamiliar shape, features mixing with familiar faces, but still unknown. It didn’t stop shifting as Zeus’ eyes bore into mine and it felt like the air was ripped from my lungs as they started squeezing in on itself, choking me as I fell to the side, clutching onto the table tightly.

“I want to punish you direly for thinking you could abandon your ruler, Iris, I really do wish.” His voice was a dark hiss as I tried to breathe, but couldn’t, “But you’re too precious to be turned into foam or a star, Hermes, however, I know just the perfect way to make him suffer for his insubordination.”

My eyes widened at the mention of Hongjoong and I tried to speak, but I couldn’t as dark spots started colouring my vision. I tried to object and scream, but no word left my mouth as I scrapped at my throat in despair while Zeus watched on with an amused expression. He loved seeing his toys fret and beg for mercy, he loved feeling like the King he was, able to rule over everyone and decide everyone’s fate. But before my misery could continue, the door of the house was slammed open and loud panting filled the house.

“I forgot my satchel—” Hongjoong’s breathless words caught in his throat as suddenly the airflow was back in my lungs and I started coughing loudly as my knees gave out and sent me tumbling to the floor. Hongjoong was by my side in an instant, body hot and skin sizzling as he grabbed my cheeks and forced my head up. His amber eyes were almost fully red as he searched for visible injuries and his jaw ticked as he turned his head to face Zeus. He had a vicious look in his eyes and he almost but spat in front of the God as his voice thundered in the confined space, “What are you doing here?!”

“I came for what’s mine—” The laugh that left Hongjoong’s mouth was guttural and it made me shiver as my frantic eyes looked at my lover with despair, begging him to remain level-headed so that he wouldn’t ruin his chances of survival furthermore.

“What’s yours?” Hongjoong spat, eyes falling on me once again to make sure I was alright. He gulped as he cradled my cheeks and I opened my mouth to beg him to stop and walk away, but lips pressed against mine firmly before I was staring back into his wild amber eyes once again. He had made up his mind, and I could do nothing to convince him to stop, to think through whatever action he took next. He was here to protect me and if that meant he’d lose his life in the process, he didn’t care. He had sworn to protect me and I knew he’d do no less than that, “Enlighten me, Zeus, what’s yours again?”

The God seemed appalled by the way Hongjoong spoke to him, face contorting into disgust as he watched my quivering form and Hongjoong’s protective stance as he stood up and shielded me from the God’s furious eyes, “Iris is what’s mine, you fool. I will feed you to Cerberus if you utter one more word—”

But Hongjoong was reckless and he didn’t care as he threw his head back to laugh loudly, hysterically, and I clutched the trousers at his ankle and yanked on them to get him to stop, but he was gone, far gone. He’d go to unimaginable lengths to protect what was his and not even his lover could stop him anymore.

“Cerberus would hack me back up if he were to swallow me, don’t be foolish you old man.” Hongjoong tsked as if he was scrutinizing a child and my heart raced in fear for him, “Besides, Hades likes me too much to let me perish, after all, I make his job a lot easier with all the souls that I carry for him to the gates of the Underworld.”

Zeus hissed and stepped closer, hands balling up into fists. I took notice of the wind picking up frighteningly so outside, to the point it rattled the hinges of the windows, and I could only pray the other villagers wouldn’t be affected by Zeus’ wrath. They haven’t been anything but kind and loving to us, I would never forgive myself if anything were to happen to them.

“Before you destroy this lovely village,” Hongjoong seemed to be thinking the same as he smirked, the look on his face eerie as red swarmed around in his dark irises, overshadowing its beautiful caramel hue, “I must inform you that I have claimed Iris and she has claimed me, so you cannot touch neither one of us, you old fool.”

My cheeks heated despite the predicament and I gulped when deafening silence followed, the wind suddenly disappearing. My heart raced in my chest and it felt like it had ascended into my throat as I felt Hongjoong’s hands around my forearms, helping me up to stand next to him. His smirk remained frightening to any mortal, but the mischievous glint in his eyes told me that he was in control, that the odds were for once in our favour as he smoothed my hair down for me, “And since you are the one that loves to make up foolish rules for your peasants to follow, do I need to remind you what it means when a deity claims someone?”

Zeus just gulped, eyes darting between me and Hongjoong, the veins underneath his skin lightning as they travelled, his eyes turning a misty grey. No one knew Zeus’ real face, but I had come close to seeing it more than once, it was ugly. It reflected the person he was on the inside; he was ugly through and through, no wonder he chose to disguise himself even between his own kin, “I can still use her abilities to my liking, Hermes, that’s not what claiming one enthrals.”

“Oh, does it not now?” Hongjoong chuckled and I felt an arm sneak around my hips until his palm pressed flatly against my belly, his bottom lip between his teeth as raised an eyebrow mockingly, “Even if the seed had been planted to bring forth a new life?”

“She’s pregnant?” Zeus’ voice raised octaves as his eyes widened comically and the fundament of the house shook as I shuddered, clutching onto Hongjoong’s arm for stability. My skin was cold and I was shivering, but Hongjoong remained like a pilar by my side, supporting me and offering me braveness.

“She is pregnant with my child, yes.” Hongjoong’s smirk spread into a wide grin that made him look crazed as his amber eyes simmered in the darkness and the ground shook again. I looked at Zeus reluctantly as I let my hand rest above Hongjoong’s, our fingers tangling together as we held onto my belly. Zeus could feel it too, the shift in the Universe and the change in the alignment of the stars, he knew Hermes and I were fated to be together; he knew if he went against the wishes of the Cosmos, it would be him paying the price and not us. I couldn’t help but huff as I suddenly felt all tension leave my muscles, serenity infusing my brain and body like never before. Hongjoong, too, knew we were safe when his offensive stance relaxed and he stood tall in contentment.

“You are both traitors.” Zeus hissed, but there was no force in his voice, only defeat and despair, “And if I can’t make you pay, the Cosmos will find ways to make you suffer for what you’ve done.”

“Is that what you say to all the mistresses you keep?” My tone was cold and unforgiving, it shocked both Hongjoong and Zeus, “I wish you nothing but an eternity of suffering and misfortune, I wish that all of your children turn on you and bring your demise like you had brought your own father’s, Zeus.”

“Did you just curse me?” His voice boomed as Hongjoong threw his head back and started cackling loudly, bringing a small smile to my lips as I chuckled.

“I am no witch, Zeus, but I believe the Cosmos works in peculiar ways.” I stopped to take a breath, to finally say what I always wished to tell him, “And just because you are supreme to all of us, it doesn’t mean you are invincible. The Cosmos doesn’t differentiate in kind.”

Somewhere in the distance, a bolt of lightning struck and a deafening roar travelled through the forest as Zeus turned into nothing but dust and charged energy, lighting our house in blinding light for a second until everything was covered in darkness and silence. I remained frozen as Hongjoong started giggling, cradling my face as he grinned at me widely, “You are the most breathtaking creature I have ever had the luck to come across, my beloved.”

“I love you too, Hongjoong.” I chuckled and let him kiss me messily before he pulled back and giggled again, unable to contain the giddiness our small victory brought upon the both of us.

“Do you think I still have to report back to him tonight?” The question made me laugh as I threw my arms around his torso and pressed my body against his, revelling in his comforting warmth as I nuzzled my nose against his neck. Hongjoong pressed a chaste kiss against the crown of my head and I melted into his arms, feeling safe and like a weight had been lifted from my chest. We would be alright for the time being, the child would be safe down between the mortals and Zeus would leave us alone for now. I couldn’t tell what the future had in store for us, at least not until a vision came to me, but I didn’t care as long as Hongjoong was by my side.

The Cosmos gifted those deserving and took from those undeserving.

❱❱ Next star

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[bambi-kinos]

“He encouraged Paul's revealed preference for enjoying feminization by putting him in the position of being John's girlfriend/wife, something John likely picked up on when Paul fed him toast as a teenager. Many of Paul's sexual habits and needs were shaped and fostered by John into something that complimented his own.”

This is such a good insight from your recent analysis and something I had sort of noticed about John and Paul but couldn’t pinpoint, which you’ve worded so wonderfully. I always thought it seemed as though John encouraged a more feminine/ domestic side to Paul which Paul might have been reluctant to express otherwise (due to Looking Like That), though I think Paul was actually very happy in more “feminine” roles. I wonder if John coaxed it out of him during their sexual encounters and then it manifested into their everyday dynamic.

It's part of John's Thing where he sees into people. No wonder he believed mind reading and ESP were real because John is incredibly good at reading people and divining their motives and intent.

I keep coming back to the toast anecdote because it's so revealing and also relatable. Feeding your boyfriend something while you try to convince him to do something he isn't sure about is very much a girlfriend tactic. I've done it myself and I bet other ladies have too. Paul instinctively knew how to maneuver John which is interesting in of itself but he also instinctively used feminine coded tactics. Contrast this to Pete Shotton who was just some guy and used the tools available to him to put John in his place: he would take swings at John and even threatened to crush his glasses at one point when John was taking a joke too far about a schoolboy crush Pete had when they were kids. John himself admired this about Pete and later said that he respected Pete immensely for standing toe to toe with him and not letting John roll him.

But Paul didn't do that. He used feminine coded tactics with John from the start, even with the guitar tuner and the conferring over strings and chords. He wasn't in your face and didn't try standing toe to toe with John, after the solo song performance of "Twenty Flight Rock" to establish his credentials he instead sat down with John and they talked. No big confrontation and no contest of wills. To quote Pete Shotton again "they circled each other like cats" so clearly there was mutual interest but Paul proved his worth by showing what an asset he was. He was never interested in blatant shows of authority. It's just such a completely different presentation than what was typical and expected from teen boys at the time...and John picked up on it.

Some of this is Paul being a more balanced person in general and also just more experienced with the reality of the world. Mary passed away and the chores of the house became more evenly split between Jim, Paul, and Mike while the aunts would visit often to take care of the heavier jobs. But it's also clear where John and Paul's personal divisions and interests lay. Paul could definitely be rambunctious and gross (like the newspaper shitting story...lmaoooo) so he did know how to be gross with the boys when he wanted to be. But there was such an intensely domestic side of him that he wanted to keep hidden from the rest of the world. It couldn't help peeking out from time to time. John remarked once that "Paul and I know each other in a lot of different ways that people don't know about" (paraphrasing) and this must have been one of the things John was referring to.

Paul valued and cherished domestic life and he doted on John when he could. I think back a lot to this excerpt from The Lyrics (hat tip to @dovetailjoints for picking up on it back in the day) about Johnny Gentle and Paul's realization that you can do anything on tour.

Like even just from this quote, the toast thing, Pau's domesticity fetish (and everything is sex for him so obviously it's kinky roleplay!) and then Paul's general behavior, you can tell something going on but then we got THIS JEWEL of a confirmation:

Paul liked being domestic and he liked taking care of John I just!!!! He wanted to be John's wife! He wanted to be Mrs. Lennon so fucking badly! God! And it must have gone exactly as you say, John encouraged it during their sex stuff and then Paul liked it so much that he did this.

[nenoname]

Details in Stan's letter that still haunt me

(how long will I continue thinking about a two page letter that's technically not even that long because Stan's handwriting is fricking large? .....you don't need to worry about that.)

The bro code only shows up in the Lost Journal pages, and to me Stan's message feels like it purposely echoes Ford's "miss you" in the college photo (and for some reason the message doesn't appear in the website version of the photo?) ....or alternatively Stan simply noticed how distressed Ford was about this entire thing and wanted to support him in a way so he can be sappy but without the kids knowing, or both!

Stan's claim about the Oregon lottery contradicts what the Lost Legends website said about Tate McGucket's ability to predict the winning numbers!! ...but also breaking into the Lottery HQ is definitely a very Stan thing to do and it's not the first time small gags have been retconned

Despite spending most of his letter nonchalantly destroying him, the taunt about ripping a dollar bill in half is the only part where Stan is directly responding to Bill. Maybe it's the two of them having similar ways of thinking but it's rather specific considering Bill taunts the reader about it...

And after Bill spends an entire book calling Ford Sixer despite normally using a pretty wide range of nicknames for him, Stan then spends his letter mainly referring to Ford as Sixer, even though post-Weirdmageddon he tends to use a mix of nicknames. And it's not like he'd gotten to see Bill himself for long, let alone see him steal that childhood nickname (that is only used twice in the actual show btw!). Did Ford tell him what happened or...?

With all this and the website's "still on your mind" message, what I'm getting at is my tinfoil hat theory of Stan somehow seeing some of the pages the irl readers saw, even when it should be personalised to the specific reader, and he's been lying about it for some reason. Considering that the book flat out doesn't make an attempt at convincing Soos, I find it a stretch that whatever Bill was telling Stan via the book was an attempt to convince him either.

Wouldn't be the first time Stan's skimmed through a book and lied about what it meant to him.

(...Now I kinda wanna see a story about the family reading their versions of the book and making fun of it while Stan is improvising every single one of his pages and blatantly ignoring Bill's attempts to mock and taunt him)

But also I'm fascinated by the letters that only showed up on the website (aka the Soos+Wendy+McGucket+Pacifica ones). I'm assuming that Mabel had stuck them on after Stan's letter... but they were basically eaten by the book itself because seeing Stan's letter kick-started Bill's breakdown which takes up the rest of the book

[yridenergyridenergy]

Sukekiyo 2025/04/21 "Makoto, Ryougan Chishibaru" live report

-Setlist-

Candis

MOAN

Aishita Shinzou

breeder

Houmonsha X

Creeper

Sharara

Honnou okotowari

mystery na

Kashikomi Kashikomi

Frame out kara no

(session)

anima

-encore-

Kashikomi Kashikomi

I'm not really going to write much about Kirito's part. No one wants my opinion on his songs. He did nine or ten songs, and he was reading almost all the lyrics that were in Japanese. If there are any Pierrot fans reading this, could you please explain? The fact that he constantly had to look down at his memo sheets, even having to step back from the crate to make sure he could see the words well... There's something very wrong about this. Is it a lack of self-confidence, or something medical? We got a sheet for his tour this month and the next, so it's not like he has zero experience and practice. And I'm clearly sensitive to memory disorders myself - that's why I write these reports to begin with - but I've never heard of a singer reading so much.

Other than that, one major difference that I noticed between Kirito's band's presence on stage and Kyo's bands' is the lighting. The musicians were constantly lit up, even if there was a backdrop video. It definitely made the show a lot weirder and less submersive than Kyo's bands. Fans of Kirito probably get much better pictures, but performance-wise, there's nothing like being bathed in darkness, apparently.

Kirito did MCs. From what I gathered, he teased the fact that sukekiyo fans are referred to as "torii-chan". He said it was cute, like fragile. I think he had his fans shout in comparison, and it seemed to be mostly male voices hah. Kirito also said something about Kyo but I was totally confused with my basic level of understanding for verbal Japanese because he never added a suffix after Kyo's name... It seemed to be about the discussion on the title of the show.

Onto sukekiyo, what a fucking show! I'm so glad people are now at the level of physical excitement as I was two years ago, pretty much on my own hah. It was amazing, the crowd followed everything and reacted to the songs even if we didn't know at first whether we could clap, let alone cheer after the songs or even when the members walked on stage.

Yuchi wore a kind of tutu skirt, I think? With a weird protruding black bra on top of a white dress shirt. He had a spiky hat, beautiful makeup, black (fingerless?) gloves and goldej rings around his neck. Takumi's hair strands were mostly pink/purple but a couple were blue on his left. He had a kind of black and white suit, I think. Mika wore all black. UtA wore a black ensemble with buttons all down the front, like a school uniform. His hair was either blond or pink, slightly puffy.

Kyo wore two articles from Adidas:

I think he hiked up the skirt higher than the model in this picture, because it appeared puffy, and it definitely seemed like a lot of his thighs was showing. Due to how Club Citta is constructed, I have no clue what shoes he wore. He also had large glasses, like in the breeder PV, and he added a couple of blond extensions to the sides of his head, in bows.

Candis was awesome as usual, the extension at the start really enhancing the song. I can't get enough of Kyo's sudden knee drops in this performance! I hadn't known whether we even needed penlights for the show - Kyo usually warns us ahead of time. When I realized which it was and that it needed a penlight, I rummaged through my bag, but like a sign of life, one penlight started flashing out of the three: the right one!

It was my first time witnessing MOAN with the penlight. We essentially do our best to replicate Kyo's moves in the chorus.

Aishita Shinzou is kind of where we started being less stiff, I think. Kyo asked us to sing a few times, and he was jumping and dancing (the dance reminds me of North American Indigenous dances) a lot. Oh and he did the finger-in-his-mouth thing before jumping!

breeder came on and woah, the PV plays in the background but whatever, what a banger, as expected! Kyo at first asked us for a few "kill my mind", but near the end of the song, we were basically tasked with them all, essentially wrapping up the song ourselves. I think we also had to do one or two "how much am I worth?" At first, it was just Mika and Yuchi playing. Yuchi had this big bass placed vertically. Kyo looked at us and nodded, hopefully when he saw that many of us were excited for the song to be performed.

And you know what? To be honest, there's something to be appreciated with projecting a PV that doesn't feature Kyo behind him on stage. It's always weird when they show the PVs since Kyo is different and unique, so he has starkly different looks and he doesn't always move the same way on stage and on screen. Having some rando isn't distracting, in that sense.

At some point, Kyo briefly asked us, seemingly out of curiosity, if this was indeed a "Ceremony of Liberation", to which we cheered and understood that we could let loose completely.

In Houmonsha X, I found Kyo to move less than he did in the Jetblack Ceremony performances, but maybe because he compensated then for the fact that nobody else could move. Even the musicians were hella concentrated and immobile during the instrumental parts. At least now, we could dance.

I got to see Creeper live! The pot-stirrong at the beginning, all the little moves throughout this song! Kyo asked us to shout the "kaeru"s sometimes, and I seem to recall that Kyo pointed a lot to us based on the lyrics.

Before this point, maybe in Aishita Shinzou, Kyo walked over on the right side of the stage and he was teasingly chewing his index in his mouth with a grin while staring at us, as if considering who he'd ask out.

Sharara and Honnou okotowari were very nice, but I don't necessarily remember anything specific right now. Probably because it involved a ton of headbanging? I think Kyo might have moved sensually more at the end of Honnou okotowari than at the beginning, even though that's how the song sounds with his low singing? And it's lovely that Kyo changed the tone of the third or fourth paragraph in Honnou okotowari to ramble on in a high-pitched voice as though he's 'bitchly vexed' and disappointed.

For mystery na, I haven't heard the studio recording beyond the audio teaser that they added on YouTube a week or so ago. They kept the essential parts of it, but there's a weird kind of empty section near the end? We were also expected to sing a part that sounds like: "...smile" but hey, most of us haven't had the chance to listen to it yet, so it showed. Otherwise, I loved how Kyo rapped, and how he made a gesture from his chest to three parts of the crowd for the "ha haha haha" part after "Odoreeeee", as though he was distributing the wealth or some emotion.

Kashikomi Kashikomi played next and it's crazy how everybody in the band is super demanding of us even in this super short song hah. For some reason, there's an emphasis that the 🙏 be bumped upward, and since the song is about ditching the concept of sexes/genders, I must say I'm confused. When Kyo sings the "woman?" "man?" part, at least once he pointed to Yuchi for one of them, and UtA for the other, before going crazy growling the rest and leading us to the headbanging part.

Frame out kara no was as cool as I expected, even if Kyo didn't do the same "throwing his hands in the air and walking around mad" move like in the video I posted recently. There was a ton of gesturing of a camera frame, and Kyo adlibbing or again changing the tone of some lyrics to act really disappointed by the resulting photograph that he held so much hope for. And when he sings about stabbing, he goes straight to Yuchi, who has his back turned because of whatever instrument he plays then, and Kyo boldly gestures stabbing him, before retreating to his central position.

Sukekiyo then started playing an improvised session, with Takumi peoducing a simple melody on the piano at first. I can't remember all of Kyo's lyrics, but it was about finding someone, something killed, tears, etc. and it became very intense rather quickly, with him shouting out his emotions. At that time, a lot of hands at the front of the crowd got up and became really agitated, so I was thinking that they were vibing way too much with Kyo and believing that they were the ones who resonated with him the most, but no, I guess they were frantically pointing out that someone had a medical emergency right there. The band kept performing like professionals.

Anima then played and the credits rolled on screen, signaling that it was probably the last song. It was emotional, most people listened stoically, in silence. This time, we started cheering before Kyo had completely walked off the stage.

We clearly didn't get enough sukekiyo with just about a half-show, so we quickly chanted: "ske-kiyo-sama" and man, you gotta love sukekiyo's punctuality. They always start their shows earlier than Dir en grey does, with little delay for latecomers, they took less than thirt minutes to come on stage after Kirito left, and once we called them for an encore, they were back right away.

Kyo asked us, unbothered, if we could go on. He kept alternating between "Ikimasu ka?" and "Ikaremasu ka?", the lattet of which is a much more formal question that would mean ", sir" in another context but which is hard to translate here. He sometimes used a tone that was like that of a polite employee asking a patron for confirmation on their request. He had his hand on his head while asking us that.

Kashikomi Kashikomi was played with somehow even less restraint, more intensity. Kyo took out one, then the second of his ear monitors to hear us, and he headbanged with us a lot. At the end of the song, he promptly walked out while the musicians jammed like a real end of concert. They were all smiles. UtA came to the very end of the other side of the stage and basked in gratefulness at multiple points on his way backstage. Yuchi insisted on us maintaining the Kashikomi 🙏 as high as possible. Mika left promptly the second time, but he had waved broadly at us from behind his screens after the main setlist in acknowledgement.

By the way, when we entered the venue, the staff asked us one by one which band we mainly came to see, and they had a counter for each.

I haven't felt like wanting to run until I collapse and exhaust all this overflowing energy in a long time.

I am definitely not bringing any penlights tomorrow - this show is meant to be danced unhampered!

[sameore]

"The Remaining Piece (The Fourth Entity)".

And what if Doey the Doughman... was more than the three subjects used for an experiment?

So, here is a fanart of Doey! A character many might have found quite attaching with his friendliness.

And honestly, finding something original to draw (and write) about him has been quite... challenging! (Well, there are so many cute fanarts of him all over the Internet!)

Yet, I didn't want to just give a "mainstream" interpretation.

So I've spent awhile trying to elaborate my imagination, and interpretation over this character. 😆

Well, the fanart also turned out to be... somewhat spooky! ÔO But, isn't Poppy Playtime supposed to be a horror game, after all?

But first, here are three random facts:

1) I have to admit I used to think "dough" was pronounced "dahff" in English, till only recently! (Well, considering this isn't my first language, I guess there is still something to learn... :')

2) Ahh, yeah. This fandom definitely helped to move on from previous things that used to consume me mentally.

3) Uhh ohh, wait a minute. HIS HAT IS BLUE?! (Why have I been thinking of it as black...) Ôo

Buttanyway!

Writing this whole thing has taken awhile (to think and rethink). 🤯

Just think a major part of what you are about to read has been already written weeks before I started working on this fanart! (There have been times when I just found it "cringe" and wanted to delete a big part of it! But, I just ended up thinking it would be a waste if I did, so... here it is anyway)

*Disclaimer: This post contains trans related references and some nerdy stuff, so don't read the following text if you feel uncomfortable around this type of subjects. However, if you're interested, be my guest. (To read at your own discretion)

To begin with,

A fun fact about the "fourth entity" is that what inspired me was my new knowledge about… anglerfish! (Thanks, Facebook I guess!)

I'll let you check, if you're curious enough... but I just found this interesting scientifically speaking. It might seem somewhat "horrifying" from our human perspective, though. .-.

Well, while obviously (and thankfully) the context is quite different, I just kept the idea of the big creature living with tiny subjects incorporated into it.

But, one thing that remained unclear to me was if the humans' consciousness was actually still living inside of Doey… or if they were plainly dead and just a part of them were used?

(I might sound silly, but...as I was reading the fandom Wiki pages of the subjects used for the experiment, I was reading "deceased in 1993" when Doey was born. And it seriously confused me! 😅)

Well, I guess if you take a look at the three humanoid heads showing up after Doey transformed to chase the protagonist (aka "the player"), you might notice they looked pretty much similar (which technically would be strange if the subjects initially looked different, and weren’t even the same age to begin with), so… my guess would be that those heads may not have been part of their actual bodies, but just the phantom “embodiment��� of the subjects’ personalities used to make Doey. Doey also seemed to keep their memories at a certain extent.

These bits of personalities didn't seem that fusional, but quite distinctive.

They seemed to interact with one another (Doey started arguing with "himself" before chasing the player, for instance), but Doey has been referring to himself as "I" and not "We" throughout the game. (scratches his head)

A) After some thinking, perhaps we could assume their human bodies had been killed, but their consciousness kept living somehow inside Doey (there is a note in the game written by another patient who mentioned waking up in a body that wasn’t hers, which might also apply to the other experiments? Anyway, it seemed to be part of Dr. Sawyer's ambition: transferring consciousnesses into bodies).

B) Another interpretation could be that eventually... their consciousness was never transferred, but Doey kept a "phantom" part of their personalities and memories, a bit like a copy (which might look like some sort of personality disorder from outside, as the switch between them might be drastic and conflicting). Doey would then NOT be the humans per se, but he would have somehow internalized a part of their personalities.

(As bits of memories would have been injected into Doey, he might sometimes sound mature, but he would also have childish "patterns" that would stick to him throughout the years: for instance, he was crying for his parents to go home as Jack would have... while technically, the events happened over a decade ago!)

✔ In both cases, you could still imagine the concept of the fourth "entity", being more or less the dough per se (it would have directly emerged from it, unlike the three other entities that came from the human subjects). Perhaps an extra part and/or the conductor, that would make Doey... actually be Doey, identify as Doey, behave like Doey?

✔ However, in the first case (A), I would imagine this fourth "entity" would be more strictly separated from the three "living" subjects, while in the second (B) it would perhaps be more like a different personality amongst the four (?)

As I was discussing this with someone IRL, we were thinking: if the three subjects are typically represented by the fan community as yellow (Jack) 🟡 , orange (Matthew) 🟠, and red (Kevin) 🔴, this fourth entity could be concretely represented by the color blue of Doey 🔵.

Regardless, I guess the game might just be open for interpretations with its mysteries! And that's also what makes it interesting?

(Or at least, I hope they will leave some mystery in the next chapters, so this universe remains open for different interpretations! :')

-

Pumpkie: Hey Sammy, you made a fanart about Mommy Long Legs before this one, right? Do you also consider we could think of "Doey the Doughman" as two versions: the conceptual version, but also the result of the Bigger Bodies Initiative?

Sam: Absolutely! Doey, as the conceptual version would just be... a jolly, friendly dough creature, working as one single individual I suppose. He would be pretty much clueless about the experiments in the factory, as he wouldn't have been there, nor would he have gone through any trauma.

Whereas, as the result of the Bigger Bodies Initiative, you already know the story: to our current knowledge, three subjects were used, and he happened to be the result of this experiment in Playtime Co.'s labs. He has interacted with the protagonist (player), and the other characters in the game.

Now, I guess the note incorporated into this fanart actually applies more to this... latter version. As for the drawing... I guess it can apply to both? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(Well, it doesn't mean you can't think of Doey as his conceptual, original version in the 50s, and headcanon him however you want! It might actually be more flexible as the character's backstory remains unclear... aaaand, honestly, you might as well be less annoyed by the angry part of the fan community)

Pumpkie: Yes, as complex as it seems, what you wrote indeed seems to... apply more to, you know, the Bigger Body version of Doey. And, I can't help but notice you mentioned anglerfish as a source of inspiration!

While I guess the tiny anglerfish that "fused" into the big one are like the subjects incorporated into Doey's dough, could you imagine the dough's inner organs could be female? You know, because if I'm correct, the big anglerfish are fema-

Sam: Uh oh… alrigh', alrigh'. First, I indeed talked about internal organs. Because, you just simply... can't see much from outside (not at first sight at least), he looks very "neutral" and can change his shape anyway (at least at a certain extent).

Now, if there were (let's say) something similar to internal female organs in some sorts, and the consciousness of the three subjects still lived inside of him, would they necessarily notice this specific detail? Only the "dough" would know, perhaps... as these organs would be constituting it/him per se.

Nevertheless, wouldn't the dough, as the fourth entity, communicate with the living consciousnesses? And at which extent?

Conversely, if what's left inside were just three "phantom personalities" existing amongst the four, I guess you could imagine things a tad differently: either Doey would know... either he wouldn't. (I guess it would also depend if these organs would "affect" his life at some point, remain dormant or not, etc.)

Anyway, I’d assume he would have a funny karyotype. Perhaps XX, or... XXX? (Typically called "X trisomy", but considering Doey is one of a kind anyway...)

Pumpkie: And what if it was XXXX?

Sam: Wow, that’s a lot of X, Pumpkie! Three BIG X is already a lot, but four...

And where would that fourth X come from, anyway? ÔO

Pumpkie: I dunno... I'm toying with you, but what if there were an impostor?

Sam: Errrrr... if you really want to have four X, I mean... that DNA sequence could come from an external agent? This "extra" X you would like to add, anyway...

Now, if the karyotype was solely made out the three subjects, one might have had a chromosomal irregularity? (And not the usual XY, which could only give three X)

We could also imagine one of them was born a girl (XX), but wouldn't it be a bit... I mean, to my knowledge they were pretty young... and yet, not the same age.

At the same time, I've seen trans teenagers, so I guess it's not such an irraaaaational thought, if one was indeed at least a teenager before the experiment. (Is it reasonable to imagine at least one of them might have been a transboy..? 🤔)

I guess in Playtime Co., they might also have changed the name of some orphans in their files after all, and kept some details more confidential. (Once again, there is room for your imagination!)

I wouldn't think of Jack though, considering his context.

Alongside, Kevin had behavioral issues but good physical abilities (according to the tests he had passed), while Matthew wasn't "gifted" physically but more mature apparently. I thiiiink Matthew was the oldest, though (if I'm correct).

Anyway. That's a lot of thinking!

For now, I'll rather focus my interest on the possibility of the "dough", functioning as a fourth entity. :')

Pumpkie: OK, Sam. I'm a bit puzzled, but knowing you enough... with all of what you said previously, do you think we could headcanon Doey as a trans man, then?

Sam: That's a bit complicated concerning Doey... I guess it really depends on your viewpoint. But, perhaps at least a part of him?

Perhaps the dough as an entity per se, I guess? If we assumed it/he was "born" with inner female organs, but identified as a man. We could, maybe, put it up this way.

 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You could also think of the "dough" as the true Doey, and the three subjects (or phantom personalities) as something extra, incorporated into him?

Anyway, there is a character in Poppy Playtime who's non-binary: a Nightmare Critter called Poe. So, why not after all? I don't know... 🤔

But, you know what? Come to think of it, Doey somewhat reminds me of the logo of “Trans Gentlemen Art”. He kinda fits to be honest. T__T Look at this little hat and... the blue stains. That logo isn't that recent, but... now I find this comparison actually funny. :')

Pumpkie: Oh. That's right: that's somewhat inky... aaaand I dunno, those arms kinda remind me of a scarecrow?

Sam: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Pumpkie: Well... now I start getting why you found some interest in this character. There are things that might feel familiar...

Talking about art and inner organs, there is that one detail in your fanart...those things, there. What did you draw? It looks like there is something inside of him.

Sam: Good point, which I almost forgot! 😃 (chuckles)

Yes, those are organs inside of him you can slightly see by transparency...

Not regular human organs per se, but they might have a flexible consistency (they probably carry DNA though, and might have grown out of the dough): basical things that enable Doey to be alive at least. As for the dough’s opacity, this looks like a smol detail in the game, but here is this fun screenshot of it. :’)

He is trying to sneak his head first into that crack on the wall.

Another thing is: I guess he can retract his teeth? ÔO

Pumpkie: Ohh, right: he's got sharp teeth!

Sam: Yeah, at first I thought it was just a thing in the fanarts, as in: people like to imagine him with those while he is in his "basic" form, but then I found out it was ACTUALLY in the game.

Pumpkie: Ah, right, the fan community... You have been in the official server, haven't you? Do you plan to share this... you know, interview, this post in there?

Sam: Errrrrrrrrrrrrr, you know, after some thinking.... I'd rather not. Perhaps the artwork, but not the whole publication? 😅

As I have been observing some reactions, I just decided I might just want my peace after all. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Pumpkie: Sounds fair.

Sam: Anyway!

That was a lot of... talk over that Big Dough Baby (phew!)

I hope you enjoyed it (I wouldn't have the confidence to call these "theories", but at least "headcanons" or "potential perspectives of representation"? :')

As for my future art projects, I don't know yet, as this one happened to be... the last of my current list! But, I might as well take a break. I've been going out less these past weeks... and my body would probably thank me for seeing the sunlight, and make it exercize some more.

(I'm also a human on my own, after all! And have to take care of my physical health, I guess! :')

Take care, everyone! 👋🏻

[sinisterexaggerator]

I had to take a closer look at the Tales of the Underworld trailer because the Cad Bane fandom got me thinking more about it as much as I am trying to avoid it, and I have lots more thoughts after watching it some ten times in a row today.

I will start by saying I think the trailer has been SPLICED with scenes out of order and in random spots, overlaid with dialogue that may or may not have anything to do with what is going on at that particular moment in the trailer. I also think Disney/Star Wars tends to do this to keep us guessing, anyhow, and it's working, but I digress.

Let's start here, for one, with the kid Duros who everyone thinks could be Bane.

So this guy, who I am pretty sure is an Arcona, is in two separate scenes (the weird/triangular head alien).

THESE scenes:

These are also scenes in which we see an adult Bane.

Notice the architecture of this shot is the same as the one with the female Duros and the child.

THIS scene with Bane is toward the end of the trailer, where he is surrounded by police lights and there is a fire in the background. Therefore, this child cannot be Bane as he is IN the scenes where we see the kid and the Arcona.

You can also see him here in the background during Bane and Niro's showdown, which that building in Aurabesh reads "Police," so this could be that the child is hiding in the police station FROM Bane or the danger Bane is causing, or perhaps that is even the police officer's son.

Sidenote: JUST LOOK AT THEIR BUILDS! NIRO IS DEFINITELY OLDER! Bane looks like a TADPOLE compared to him.

Now, this line ...

Bane says this very calmly. He is not in his bounty hunter gear. He is not wearing his hat. It is obvious they are both younger here, and for him to deliver this line rationally makes me think it couldn't be something as near or dear to him as his family, otherwise they would already be guns blazing IMO-- but ALSO, what if that isn't the cop he's talking to?

Another thing I found interesting is this scene, which is the fire/arrest scene that I mentioned earlier. The moment Niro points, it shows this shot following after it:

I do not believe these scenes are connected however, specially since I notice that this little boy duros' shirt is the SAME SHIRT the child is wearing who is holding ONTO a Duros that COULD be Bane (a different child, not the one the female Duros is holding onto) and I think that because the outfits/collars are SO SIMILAR ... that child who is arrested is actually Niro. The cop.

That means of course that Niro turned himself around. Maybe there is more than two Duros here. Maybe there are multiples. At least three involved in this storyline ...

"I hope your revenge was worth it."

"It will be."

I am just fascinated by this because he uses future simple tense. Why is this revenge going to pay off in the future? What did Bane do that will affect this cop for days to come unless he's literally referring to the fact he just saved his own reputation by killing an impersonator ...

Finally, It all comes down to why does he say this? "You're going to pay for what you did." Maybe Niro broke up their little squad? Maybe he tossed him in jail? Hmm. Or maybe, again, he isn't speaking to Niro ..

The only scene that is out of place in the trailer is this mystery Duros who is not Bane's scale color, dressed like Bane and jumping over a fruit stand, which there is a Twi'lek shooting at him.

Sidenote #2: ALSO HE DOES NOT HAVE NIRO'S BUILD AT ALL! Unless this is FAARRRR in the past when Niro was young himself, but.... I doubt it. Just seems like someone else entirely to me??

This, as others have said, may tie into the Legends comic story of "Bane versus ... Bane?" which his "best friend" impersonates him to start a criminal organization back on Duro, and what's fascinating about that is what Wookieepedia says about Soopan:

Under his guise as Bane, Soopan became wanted by the local sheriff and, during the Clone Wars, the real Bane journeyed to Duro to track down his former associate.

THE LOCAL.... SHERIFF...

WHO REMAINS UNIDENTIFIED.

WHAT IF ... Niro isn't actually the "old friend" at all, and they KEEP SOOPAN?? AND THAT *IS* Soopan, just a redesign of his character who is jumping over the fruit stand, and this whole story is all tied together somehow. Because to me, he is a little bit of a different shade of green!

WHAT IF SOOPAN IS COMMITTING CRIMES UNDER BANE'S NAME AND THE COPPER IS AFTER BANE FOR SHIT HE DIDN'T DO?

WHAT IF HE WANTS SOOPAN TO "PAY FOR WHAT HE DID?"

WHAT IF THE "NOBODY HAS TO DIE" LINE IS BECAUSE SOOPAN IS IN JAIL AND BANE WANTS TO GO IN THERE AND KILL HIM??

WHAT IF HE DOES??? WHAT IF THAT IS WHY THE DAMN BUILDING IS ON FIRE AND HE ASKS IF IT WAS WORTH IT?!?!

Anyway, that was a lot of speculation, but also I feel like some of my detective work may be solid. I hope this has to do with breaking up a friendship, trying to steal his reputation, or double-crossing him somehow than anything to do with his mother, a lover, or Bane having his own kid. ^__^

[vagueeyes]

here's everything i wrote down for STAGE/FRIGHT - apr 5 matinee.

‼️ spoilers ahead ‼️

ok thank you AGAIN @somuchwatersoclosetohome for letting me tag along. i fully expect this to be a collab between us, so anything i couldn't get (both in terms of observations & references), please feel free to refer to her eventual post!!

the seat this time was in the stalls, so closer to the stage than where i was on mar 27!

a house divided/bcdr:

-seeing gaby french & mark extance come on as theatre attendants! on my first show i didn't recognise anybody other than r&s so now that i did know who's who, it was good to catch this.

-seeing the makeup tape close up was kind of funny lol

-during len's hat & coat routine, on first watch i was kind of just staring at reece (lol), but on this watch, from my angle i could only see len, so it was nice to be able to fully appreciate steve acting this part out!

-(crap now i can't remember if this comes first or the prev bit) during the vincent vomit sketch, i didn't realise tommy mouths along to vincent's lines! iirc they don't do this in the ep so that was a nice surprise!

-was able to watch the screen come down (sideways?) when len disappears - ty @wintersoulwitch for pointing that out!

-the leanne/tommy hug was quite 🥺 this time

the kidnappers:

-reveal of the guest: immediate reaction was - "this man is TALL". louis theroux is definitely someone i've heard of but not familiar with, so a lot of the references went over my head i'm afraid!

-once louis was revealed, he looks back and forth between len & tommy for a long time. when len gets louis to say what he's been in, reece (at this moment i saw him as reece tbh) just smiles at them while biting his index finger. what the hell was that!!

-for a while louis still had his hands behind his back, len reminds him that his hands have been untied 😂 louis & everyone had a good laugh at that

-he did well with the spanish and the trumpet playing actually!

-"it's onnnlyyy a stick of celerehhh!" this one was steve doing a big wave of his hand (the one that's holding the celery iirc?) while delivering the line lol

-at the end when louis bursts out of the wardrobe, the tirade was something like "i was on BBC2, around the same time as THE LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN. we would've seen each other in the canteen! i'm not a stage actor - i'm a television national treasure. i have 3 BAFTAs as well, i don't need this. my agent talked me into it."

-last line going up the stairs: "mark gatiss was the best one anyway" - len nods in agreement here. does he always do this whenever a guest namedrops mark?

interval:

-while i was queueing in the washroom, two ladies behind me were gushing about steve! one of them mentioned his puffer jacket(!!) and the other said "he's still got it" !!! cute to hear this chat irl lol

-at the 20mins mark, the theatre manager came to the front to announce that there was a technical issue and they were looking into it! definitely everybody thought this was a bit at first, but he assured us that it wasn't.

-he said fingers crossed for 10mins, but it went on for 1hr!!! we theorised that it was either the safety curtain not being able to come back up, or something to do with the video wall. then someone came out to chat to the people behind us, and she confirmed it was indeed the video wall not working.

-at the 1hr mark, the associate director came out to explain that they were going to carry on doing the show as is but that it was going to be "a bit different". which was actually quite exciting!

act ii:

scene started as is. at one point, @somuchwatersoclosetohome leaned over to say the video/screen in the background wasn't on, which i hadn't even noticed tbh! so here's what was missing:

-when goudron explains how he killed his wife, we don't see this happen - we only get the sound effect

-when marcus says "let's bring the video wall down", vincent says "i don't think we should do that" here he pauses and everyone laughs & cheers!! then something about how "video never fucking works anyway!"

-reece definitely flubs whatever new line they came up with, because he says "oh is it my line now?" this kinda gets drowned out by the laughter

-when the stage that vincent/steve is standing on moves, steve seemed to forget to step down so he was startled by it moving!!! 😂😂

-marcus definitely says the "grammar" line twice, not sure if this was reece flubbing or an actual last minute change/edit.

-during the trepanning scene, they do still bring the camcorder(?) on stage and they act eveything out as if the video wall is there - but we the audience have to watch the actors, rather than flick up to the screen.

-same with the self-taping scene. it's all played out as is and we watch the actors act/react. here we felt they amped up the sound for when they think they see something on the screen.

-when abby/gaby leaves the stage, sherrie/miranda does everything as is - but when she leaves the stage, ofc we don't get to see the backstage part. there's like a <1min beat and they drop the head in the centre of the stage.

-everything is as is when sherrie comes back out and is scared off stage, and the abby/marcus part is also the same.

-when abby kills marcus, she picks up the camera and does the 360 around the stage - here we don't get the audience disappearing & the jumpscare on camera. instead, bloody belle comes up in the box (as per) and she does the scream when the light is shone on her! end scene

stray observations:

-good to spot marcus mouthing along to the lines during the trepanning scene! such an ollie moment lol

-some people still stood up to clap during the first curtain call lol

-same audience reactions that i still think are cute: gasps when tommy points the gun at len & reactions to the foot sawing part. the man sat behind me did go "oh my godd" when they do the "will he be long"/"about average for a man his height" line exhange lmao

-i love how much the audience loves hugo!!

-we both wondered how the toby/reece switch was done but forgot to look out for this! too focused on seeing what changes they made to act ii!!

alright that's it for now! might add more about this show later if i can recall. starting the day early bc i've been up since 6am lol it'll be good to go outside and clear my head a bit.

[emmygdala]

We would like to see the baby ☺️

OK!!!!!!! PLEASE BE NICE DON'T BULLY HIM OR I'LL CRY there might be mistakes but i don't want to Draw this freak anymore

SOME STUPID STUFF about crestau (canon divergent pkmn au if you don't wanna see that u don't have to interact)!! UNDER THE CUT!!!! it's super messy and unorderly i'm so sorry

he used to work as a judge (formal title is iudex judge of truth, iudex is just judge in latin lol there's a lot of latin in this au) with ingo actually!! but emmet got terminated from his job after breaking out a prisoner arceus personally wanted dead.. the prisoner's name is yun, she's an oc hehe

about crestau's name; you can either say crestau as one word or just crest AU, i like to refer to it with either pronunciation haha

AND for how crests themselves work, here's a simple definition from my google doc on the au! the google doc is super lengthy and unfinished so i won't be linking it,, sorry :(

crests only show up on the body when the ability is being used; so whenever emmet manipulates heat or conjures his flames, his crest (which would be the flame-like markings on the left side of his face) show up! ingo is in this au (i literally never draw him though but he has a design,,) and he's crested with zekrom! the people of unova have coined them nicknames as the left hand of truth and right hand of ideals

OH speaking of ingo, submas in this au never gets separated BUT their relationship is heavily strained for roughly 100 years lol but it does get resolved after a huge fight between the two

some fun character trivia/details about cremmet (how my friends and i refer to crestau emmet):

his favorite dish is cream stew!! it's something ingo always made for him whenever he found himself sick and he derives a lot of comfort from it his birthday is june 19th!! his zodiac is gemini the twinsss hehe he's 6"4 (193cm) but with his heels, he's 6"7 (200cm) roughly 130 something years old flamma veritatis is the name of reshiram's crest, it's latin for flame of truth! his last name is vanderbilt

his claymore has a name, it's chalybe sol (steel sun) and it's a reference to yun (the aforementioned prisoner he broke out) and her specialty in pokemon with steel/fire types! it can. cut through the mantle of the earth,,,,, actually anything butterfly related in his outfit (hat accessory, ear cuff/earring, coat) is an homage to yun who he thought was dead for 113 years

he's my pfp on tumblr hehe and right next to him here is yun; i did not draw these adorable chibis, credit belongs to @/LayLay_9158 on crepe!!!!!!

TY FOR ASKING TO SEE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM ALWAYS HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT MY LITTLE AU..

[rorywritesjunk]

I will never ask you for anything, Except to dream sweet of me

Look, everyone has some kind of secret. You just didn't want Buggy to find this one out. Rating: PGish, honest. Warnings: None really. Girlfriend references making one threat. Buggy feels just a little bit insecure. A/N: I wrote this quick and had fun with it. I wanted some light hearted fluff nonsense. For once no one is having a bad day in this. Song title comes from "Heaven, Iowa" by Fall Out Boy.

Whenever you knew Buggy would be gone for several nights in a row on raids, pillages, and whatever he did when he was gone for nights on end, you made sure you had your own way of coping with missing him. It was hard not having him around in bed to keep you company because hey, you loved that silly guy, but you also had your own needs, and one of those needs was tucked in a box in your side of the wardrobe underneath some shoes. He never looked there because you always put away the laundry, so whenever he was gone you made sure to sneak it out and keep it in bed with you.

You expected him to be gone for four nights total, which was perfect because you knew if he discovered what you had he may be offended or mortified that you used it as a substitute for him. Buggy was sensitive about certain things, you have known this, which is why it was a secret. You never told him what you bought during one of your grocery runs. You couldn’t help it when you saw it. You needed it.

Again, four nights. Buggy wouldn’t be back for four nights. That was fine with you, but what you didn’t expect was him to show up on the third night as a surprise.

It was late when he showed up in your shared quarters. He was a little disappointed to find you asleep, but he took notice that you were in one of his shirts and on his side of the bed, even using his pillow. He tossed his jacket over the back of a chair and set his captain’s hat on the seat before making his way over to you. You had the covers pulled up to your nose as you slept, looking adorable and peaceful. 

Yea, he was definitely going to wake you up because he wanted a kiss.

He pulled the covers back and leaned down, only to freeze when he saw what was clutched to your chest. 

“What the fuck is that?” He demanded, waking you up from your slumber. Your head was spinning from the sudden wakeup call and it took you a moment to realize he was standing there.

“Buggy!” You exclaimed as you tried to hide what you didn’t want him to see under the blankets, but he was too fast, snatching it out of your hands as he held it out at arms length, looking a little horrified. “Let me explain!”

“Where did you even get this?!” 

“Buggy!”

“I don’t… what is this?!”

“I miss you when you’re gone!” You told him as you scrambled out of bed to try and snatch it from him. He held it out of your reach.  “I bought it at the market, okay? Some little old lady was making them!”

He stared at the little plushy that weirdly resembled him, from the orange captain’s hat all the way to his nose. Buggy touched the plushy carefully, turning it over as he inspected it before touching the nose. “Who made this?”

“She based them off wanted posters. She's made a bunch of different pirates.” You huffed as you finally snatched it from him. “I just miss you when you’re gone, so I bought it, but I was embarrassed and didn’t want you to get weirded out, okay?” You poked him hard in the chest accusingly. “And you said you’d be gone for four nights, Buggy! Why are you home a night early? I didn’t want you to know about this!”

“We finished early.” He said, his eyes never leaving the little plushy in your hands. “And I missed you.”

You pouted at him. “Well, I missed you too. I always miss you. So I have this little Buggy to hold while I think of you, but I’m never going to ask you to stay when you gotta go do stuff, okay?”

“That’s not to replace me, right?” He asked, pointing at it. 

“What? No!” You told him. “I’d never replace you!”

He reached for it and you hesitated for a moment before handing it over to him. You didn’t want him to wreck it because you adored it, but you also didn’t want him to be too weirded out by it. “Look, if you really don’t like it, I’ll get rid of it…”

“No, I don’t want you to get rid of it.” He said as he looked it over again. The construction of it was pretty durable, and the clothes were made to come off if desired. He touched the nose, finding it held on by just a few stitches. He frowned at that.

You hesitated when you saw he noticed that little detail. “I told her she needed to add your nose. She… didn’t include it when I picked it up so I told her to add it or else.”

“Or else?” He glanced up at you with a bit of a smirk. “Threatening old ladies now, babe?”

“It wasn’t you without the nose, Buggy!” You shot back as your cheeks flushed, both from the slight embarrassment of this whole situation and from recalling the conversation with the old woman. “She didn’t think it was necessary and we argued, and finally I told her to add the nose or else she wouldn’t have a booth anymore.” You huffed. “I may have overreacted, but I love it.”

He flicked the nose of the toy before handing it back over to you. “Keep it on your nightstand if you want, I guess.”

You took it back and gave it a hug. “Really?”

“However, If I catch you hugging it while I’m home and in bed with you then I’m torching it.” He warned you. 

“Ass.” You retorted with a grin. “I love you.”

“Yea, whatever.” He muttered as he took it out of your hands and tossed it on the bed before grabbing you and pulling you in for a kiss. He mumbled against your lips, “Love you too, babe.”

~~

btw if you've never seen the Buggy plushy this is what inspired this because I bought it and it's so ridiculously cute.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.3

John having to get high out of his mind because he knows he's invited Paul to come play with him is so so sad. These are the same guys who used to sit facing each other on a bed playing guitars for hours, and now this is them?

Is John calling Paul “Jack Lemon” a reference to “some like it hot”? Because if so, I have questions. Anyway, when your estranged best friend shows up to hang out with you and a bunch of people, talking about being in love again and getting jizzed on is extremely normal and acceptable behavior.

This jam session is so fucking painful though. Paul's doing his best to just push through and get them to actually play something and John's just too far gone.

My theory: there's two reasons he did this. 1. He's avoidant and the last thing he's going to do is let on how bad he needs John in his life and how scared he is that if John gets back with Yoko that that'll be difficult. And 2. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't. If he'd kept it from John that Yoko wanted him back and later John cried to him about how much he missed Yoko or something? Paul can't have that.

John singing a snatch of Yesterday before a take of “Whatever gets you through the Night”??? Did either of them ever write a song where they weren't thinking about the other? Did they ever have a minute of peace without the other rattling the bars of the cage in his brain?

“Hold me Darling, come on, listen to me. I won't do you no harm.” Duh it's about Paul. Oh my gosh.

And with Bless You I'm always so torn. There are so many obvious references to Paul which the doc points out beautifully, but situationally it could also be about Yoko. Maybe it's about both of them in the same way that don't let me down is about both of them.

Anyway the cosmic visuals are gorgeous.

Why'd you have to phrase it like that though? Twice?

Hall of Fame moment. It's a high point for him career-wise and he chose to pull Paul into his spotlight. Not only to sing Paul's song, not only to name-drop him, but to publicly call him an official romantic title. Not “boyfriend” or “ex-wife” which both could've been much more mocking if that's what he was trying to do. But “fiance”. It's official and respected, but it's still got the lustful, unsettled, connotation that something like “husband” lacks.

Johann Weener, everyone. What a loser.

Everyone who still refers to Lennon Remembers like it's the fucking Bible listen to this. It doesn't go on for the next five years, let alone fifty.

John refusing to walk to blocks to sign the papers when George and Paul flew over the ocean. And only on the basis of astrology. He really didn't want the divorce. My heart aches for him. But he made his bed as they say.

I'm putting on my tinfoil hat again here, but I do just have to point out that one of John's first songs, “Hello, Little Girl,” has a line that goes, “you never seem to see me standing there”. And the earliest draft of WISHST, which was started soon after, answers that line. “I saw you standing there.” (Yes, it said you originally, not her). So maybe. Just maybe. That song wasn't just a Paul song, but a song that John knew Paul had put a message in for him. Okay, I apologize for the insanity. On another note, I do wonder if he ever found out what Paul thought of that.

Interviewer: ≈ at this point, do you like writing by yourself, or do you want to write with Paul again?≈ John: ≈well it's a bit of both. It's the same for Paul. We were talking about it a week ago. Okay, cool. So they definitely talked openly and honestly about potentially writing together again.

John, about their partnership, “There was always the feeling that someone was there if you needed it.” Paired with the gayest picture ever taken and then Paul singing “if I can do anything at all, let me help.” Thanks. I hate it.

John was so excited for New Orleans! What happened? I mean I have my theory based on May's book and the sudden shift in behavior. But it's pretty dark.

You know how crazy Paul is about John in interviews now? How he can't seem to keep John's name out of his mouth? John was worse in the seventies. He's promoting his Rock’n’Roll album, talking unprompted and romantically about how he met Paul, when the interviewer reminds him what relationship he's supposed to be romanticizing right now. So John remembers too and dedicates the album to Yoko who he's just got back together with.

Biconic quote.

Interviewer asks, after John's brought him up, if John's pleased with how well Paul's doing. John expresses his relief that Ringo has "found himself a niche" and then

I really do think that last bit sums up a big chunk of how John feels about Paul, and why he feels alright playing dirty against Paul or slagging Paul off. Why it would have been the furthest thing from his mind that Paul actually struggled or was insecure. Why Paul had to remind him, “I'm only a person like you, love.”

What an insane thing to think, let alone say. What if Julian had heard that? I'm pretty sure Julian and Paul weren't in contact, really at all, until the eighties, right? So John's doing better than he is at this point (I mean he's his dad, he should be). John is insecure about every possible thing and compares himself to Paul in every possible way.

Baby. He needed some serious help. The thing that sucks about being ahead of your time is that you also have to live in a world that's behind your needs.

And then. “There's always a friendly tv channel to turn to that's going to make you feel less alone.” I wonder if Paul “Call Me Back Again, John I know you're not that tired from the baby just let me in the fucking door” McCartney heard this? It's possible with how obsessive they were, but it's also impossible with how busy he kept himself.

Okay, here's the first story we've been missing about Paul experiencing negative emotions. And, of course, as always in this doc, it's paired perfectly with “Don't Let it Bring you Down” which is the musical mission statement of Paul's clenched-jawed smile philosophy.

"I tend to get a bit absolute in my statements." Yes, John. Yes you do. Another quote that Big Lennon fans should keep in mind.

John on the three weeks he took to decide if he wanted to continue the band after the first Hamburg trip: The others were mad because we could've been making money. Yeah, John, Paul suddenly had to work in a factory after he'd thrown away an educated, white-collar career (the first in his family) to be in your band. I'd be pissed too if you just didn't even bother to call. Anyway I just hate how casual John is about it. Someone who never had to worry about money is just never going to get that.

John doesn't even remember a ballpark number of how much they were making. Paul remembers exactly bragging to his professors that he was making fifteen a week in Hamburg. Sorry to go on and on about this right before Paris, but to me it's an important difference between them.

Anyway, the fact that Paris was more than just a vacation for them. The fact that – according to Stuart and John at least – they might not have come back. It's dizzying. They really thought about just running off together. I wonder what made them decide to come back and continue the band.

No offense if you do, but I don't personally believe in this stuff. What would the motivation have been for the tarot reader to tell him that? Either way, fuck him.

Gosh the live version of “Call Me Back Again”. You feel it, physically, how bad he wants this phonecall. And the desperation from such a successful man is fantastic. Literally, John, how did it feel to be the only man in the world that could get Paul McCartney to beg? “Pretty baby” “what can I do?” “Boohoohoo babe.” “I tried the operator, but I just can't get through.”

Reporter at the Wings over America tour: No John Lennon, no George Harrison, and no Ringo Starr, just Paul McCartney. And for everyone here tonight, that seemed to be plenty! Obviously he's loving this praise after all the negative press. Anyone would, and Paul needs it more than most people actually. But I bet part of him is like “stop. Don't say it like that, they already hate me enough as it is.”

How many times has John admitted that he finds Paul attractive? “It was no surprise, you know, when the kids – girls saw him, they go ‘ooh! Ooh!’ right away, you know?”

“I know it's true. It's all because of you.” Playing over this? Are you kidding me? Anyway I've never seen the picture version of this, so I thought I'd screenshot it.

But actually, in a way, the original written lyrics to Now and Then are less depressing than what he sang on the demo. “I know it's true, I'm still in love with you, and if I make it through, it's all because of you,” is obviously sad because they're both married to other people. But at least in that version, John's saying his own personal resilience to life's struggles comes from his relationship with Paul, which is nice. Whereas when John, who is sliding into a self-hating deep depression I'm comparing himself to Paul's phenomenal success, sings “it's all because of you” in a general sense, it almost feels like a callback to the ‘I'm shit and I couldn't do anything but be a Beatle (and ride Paul's boat)’ quote. Which is heartbreaking. I wish he could've recognized his own genius.

But yeah either way it's enough to make your heart heavy. If anyone needs a good cry, just go to the last five minutes of this. That should've been the now and then music video, but Paul's too scared of feelings. Which. You know. Considering how much it affects me, I can't even imagine how much it affects him. So he gets a pass.

“Why must we be alone? It's real love. It's real.”

[louisaland]

Law and Order Organized Crime Season 5 episode 7 thoughts

That was quite some opening. At least I was prepared for the explosion, thanks to promos and trailers. 

Elliot definitely seems to be having some sort of PTSD. He should not be living alone! 

When his gaze rested on the bin/trash can with the doll dressed in a police uniform used to prank/haze Eli felt very symbolic and significant as a metaphor for Eli’s very brief police career ( I really can’t see him continuing in that career whatever the outcome to the investigation following the shooting is, and my gut is telling me it’s going to be bad).

He’s such a good dad, bringing Eli and Becky breakfast and helping out however he can, unlike Eli, who just seems totally out of it and doesn’t seem to be helping with household chores, the baby or anything that is important to Becky. He was also really rude to his dad, barely said hello to him and was dismissive ( « We’re not using that ») regarding all the baby things Bernie used with Elliot and his siblings. There were so many other ways he could have said he didn’t like/want it ( « Say thanks to Grandma, but we already have one/I don’t think it will match the colour scheme or theme for the nursery »). 

Nice little callback to Elliot watching the news of the explosion that nearly killed him a couple of eps ago and Eli standing the exact same way. 

Towards the end of the episode, when Elliot was holding baby Owen, I got flashbacks to S9 of SVU, Paternity, when Elliot holds baby Eli ( who also has a blue hat and a white/cream blanket round him), which was a sweet parallel. 

Also, dude, stop pushing your dad ( that you allegedly love) away. He’s trying to help you! 

Not a fan of the new baby’s name, as it reminds me of a character I really cannot stand on Grey’s Anatomy, especially as he shares a surname with Eli’s FTO, who is equally awful!

He should be recommending therapists/counselors to Eli, not dragging him out to get completely drunk ( also, how is Eli 21? I had him at 20 tops!), Also blowing off dinner with Becky’s parents is just immature and rude. I did love seeing Protectelliot/Papa Bear Elliot chew Hunt out for what he did, though I’m not sure Eli deserved to be defended as he was really bratty to his dad. 

I get that Eli is probably depressed/has PTSD/is traumatised by what he went through, but he has so much love and support to help him get through it. Becky saying she wants her soft and sensitive/kind and gentle boyfriend back was very telling, as those are not words I would use to describe a member of the police force! 

Poor Becky, at least she has Elliot to confide in, but he had so much going on already:worrying about his mum, Randall’s actions ( we have to get that convo next episode, it’s going to be explosive! I think Vargas will get some of the heat too.), his deep concern about Eli and his own health issues are not conducive to s happy, healthy Elliot. 

I did love that he referred to Randall as « his Randall » which felt very protective and big brotherly of him, though he is the younger brother. 

And I think Bernie actually saw Joe Jr, as usually when she has her memory lapses, she seems to ignore the other people’s response but this seemed like a real conversation, 

Elliot had spent so long being the reliable, responsible son and father that I understand why Bernie suggests Joe Jr seek him out, but Elliot really needs a break from fixing everyone’s problems!

I liked seeing more of Vargas, but really missed Bell and Reyes ( did he go to Italy with her?).

The actual crimes are not what I watch the show for, can you tell?

[lowkeeho]

The Last Time

2.2k words

Pairing: Keeho (p1h) x fem!reader

Genre: Angst, smut, exes-to-lovers (ish), emotionally charged, situationship tension, toxic comfort

cw: NSFW / 18+ only. Contains explicit sexual content, emotional arguments, intense language, possessive dynamics, oral sex (f receiving and m receiving), face sitting, light hair pulling, fingering, breast play, multiple positions (wall, oral, missionary, doggy, riding), creampie, messy climax, overstimulation, and references to a toxic romantic cycle. No condom used pls be safe irl!

Of course he shows up early.

You barely have time to throw on a hoodie over your half clothed body only wearing underwear beneath before there’s a knock—sharp, impatient, the kind of knock that says I’m not here for small talk. You know it’s Keeho. And part of you, a very stupid part, hoped he wouldn’t actually come.

You swing open the door and there he is. Annoyingly good-looking, black hoodie shoved halfway up his forearms, hands shoved into his pockets, jaw set like he’s bracing for war.

“Wow,” you deadpan. “Didn’t think punctuality was in your vocabulary.”

Keeho raises a brow, barely looking at you as he steps inside uninvited. “Didn’t think common courtesy was in yours.”

Oh. Okay. We’re doing this.

You shut the door a little too hard.

“What do you even need from here?” you ask, arms folded tight across your chest like it’ll keep the rest of you from unraveling. “Thought you took all your stuff last time you stormed out.”

He doesn’t answer right away. Just walks past you into the living room like muscle memory brings him here. Like he still belongs. His eyes flick toward the bookshelf—half of which still holds the crap he left behind because, of course, he couldn’t commit to even leaving properly.

“My charger,” he mutters, grabbing it off the side table. “And my hat.”

You scoff. “Right, the holy fucking grail.”

He turns to face you then, eyes dark, something like a smirk playing at his lips but it doesn’t quite reach them. “You could’ve just left it at the desk. Would’ve saved us both the energy.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you bite, stepping closer without even realizing. “Did I forget to do your emotional labor and your chores?”

That hits. His jaw clenches, and when he speaks again, it’s quieter. Meaner.

“You always do this. Start swinging when you’re the one who pushed me away.”

Your laugh comes out humorless. “You walked out. Or do we have different definitions of ‘done’ now?”

“I walked out because you don’t let anyone in unless it’s on your terms.” He’s close now. Way too close. “Because everything has to be some performance with you. You’d rather lose something real than admit you need it.”

The words hit harder than they should. Probably because they’re half true. Maybe more than half.

You glare at him, blinking too fast, heart pounding too loud.

“And you,” you spit, “think being hot and loud makes up for the fact that you never listen.”

“I always listened to you,” he growls, stepping into your space.

“Then why the hell didn’t you stay?” you shout, shoving him.

He doesn’t move far. Just stands there, chest heaving, staring at you like he’s trying to memorize this version of you too.

“You don’t want me to stay,” he says, voice rough.

“I never said that,” you snap.

“You never had to,” he whispers, and then he kisses you.

Hard.

Your back hits the wall. His hands are on your waist, pulling you in like he can’t get close enough. You kiss him back because you’re tired of pretending you don’t miss the way he tastes like something familiar and dangerous, like every bad decision you’d make again just to feel something.

This isn’t new.

This is you and Keeho, in all your messy, too-hot-too-fast, emotionally constipated glory.

You break the kiss long enough to mutter, “This doesn’t change anything.”

He grabs your jaw, tilts your chin so you’re forced to look at him.

“Didn’t ask it to,” he breathes. “Just want to feel you one more time.”

Goddamn him.

Your hoodie’s already lifting up your stomach. His fingers dig into your waist like he wants to leave bruises just to prove he was here.

And still, you’re thinking:

This is a terrible idea.

But he’s already hard against me and I’m so fucking lonely and I missed this. Missed him. Fuck.

You’re still pressed between Keeho and the wall, breath hitching as he palms your bare breasts after tugging off your hoodie completely like he missed the weight of them. Maybe he did. Or maybe he’s just like this—always greedy, always impatient with you. He mouths at your chest like he’s starved, leaving wet kisses and sharp nips in his wake.

“Of course you’re not wearing a bra,” he mutters against your skin, half-admiring, half-scolding, hands dragging down your sides to grab your ass, like he can’t decide where to touch first. “You always do this shit to me.”

You roll your eyes, fingers already working under the hem of his hoodie. “Yeah, I woke up today thinking, ‘How can I specifically ruin Keeho’s life?’” You shove the hoodie over his head before he helps peel it off, leaving him shirtless and slightly breathless in the low light of your apartment.

His sweatpants follow, and then you’re both half-naked, hot skin against skin, the kind of friction that makes you both hiss. You palm him through his boxers, the outline of him thick and twitching, already straining against the fabric.

“You’re so fucking hard,” you murmur, almost amused. “What happened to being mad at me?”

“I am mad,” he groans as your hand grips tighter. “Still wanna fuck the attitude out of you.”

You open your mouth to respond, something cutting and sarcastic—but his fingers are already slipping past your waistband, sinking between your folds like he owns the place.

“Fuck, y/n,” he breathes, two fingers curling inside you like muscle memory. “You’re soaked.”

“You think I don’t hate that?” you gasp, your hips already rocking into the rhythm he sets. “I hate that it’s you who gets me like this.”

He chuckles darkly, kissing down your neck as his fingers fuck into you. “You hate it but your pussy loves me. So who’s lying?”

Your leg is hoisted up onto his shoulder before you can blink, and he drops to his knees, pushes your drenched panties to the side, holding you open with two fingers, pressing you back against the wall with the weight of his body. His mouth is on you immediately—sloppy, hungry, familiar. His tongue flattens and flicks and drags through your folds like he’s making up for lost time.

“Oh, my—shit, Keeho—” You brace against the wall, thigh trembling over his shoulder, his grip bruising your ass to keep you steady.

He hums like he enjoys how you taste, like he likes it messy—wet sounds and your breathless gasps filling the room as his tongue plunges into you. And then he adds his fingers again, fucking them into you while he sucks your clit, and your eyes roll so hard you see stars.

Your hand tangles in his hair, tugging, grounding yourself with the sound of your own moans and the slick, obscene rhythm between your thighs. He groans into your core, sending vibrations straight through you, and you’re dangerously close, legs locking, chest heaving, moaning louder than you mean to.

He stands quickly, still holding you up, mouth shiny with your arousal. “You gonna come already?” he pants, dick pressing into your thigh. “Didn’t even fuck you yet.”

Something shifts in your brain. Maybe it’s the fact that you’re seconds away from unraveling, or maybe it’s the smug way he licks his lips like he knows exactly what he does to you. Either way, you’re done letting him have all the control.

You push him back toward the bed with both hands, chest heaving, legs still trembling, and he falls onto the mattress with a breathless laugh.

“You wanna play games?” you snap, striding over to him stopping and dropping to your knees between his legs. “Let’s play.”

You slide his boxers down and his cock springs free—thick, hard, so ready. You wrap your hand around it and stroke slowly, smirking when his head falls back against the pillows.

“Fuck, y/n…”

“I know how you like it,” you say, leaning down and licking a slow stripe up his shaft. “Don’t forget who had you begging last time.”

You take him into your mouth, slow and deep, eyes locked on his face. He groans—loud, desperate—his hand coming down to your head like muscle memory, fingers threading through your hair. Not forcing, just grounding. His hips twitch when you swirl your tongue under the head, and you hum around him, lips stretched, spit dripping down your chin and his cock.

“Shit, baby, that mouth—fuck,” he chokes out, eyes fluttering. “I missed this. Missed you.”

You pull off with a pop, wiping your chin with the back of your hand before crawling up to kiss him. He pulls you in instantly, tongue hungry, hands gripping your thighs.

“This is the last time,” you whisper against his mouth.

“Yeah,” he lies, voice wrecked.

He flips you over, pulling you into his lap. You hover over him, your slick folds brushing his cock as you sink down slowly. The stretch makes your eyes roll, jaw going slack.

“Fuck, you’re big—” you gasp, the words catching in your throat.

“Don’t hold back,” he groans, gripping your ass, steadying you as you take every inch. “Wanna hear you.”

You moan loud as your hips fully seat him inside you, and he throws his head back.

“God, look how pretty you are like this,” he groans. “Taking me so fucking good.”

You move—slow at first, hips rolling, finding your rhythm as he kneads your breasts and mouths at them again. Your moans mix with his low groans, his cock grinding into you at just the right angle.

“I hate you,” you gasp, but it sounds more like I need you.

“Shut up,” he grunts, thrusting up hard. “You love this.”

And you do. God, you do.

He groans like he’s losing his mind, and you’re not far behind—riding him until your thighs tremble, his cock grinding deep, filthy words falling from both your mouths between breathless moans and lip-biting stares.

Then suddenly, his hands are gripping your hips tight, halting your rhythm.

“Turn around,” he pants, voice low and wrecked.

Before you can sass back, he’s already maneuvering you—flipping you over like you weigh nothing, pressing your chest into the mattress, hips hauled up beneath him. You gasp as the air hits your bare skin, breasts dragging along your sheets, ass raised for him like it’s second nature.

You barely have time to adjust before he’s inside you again, thick and pulsing, burying himself deep with one brutal thrust that knocks the air from your lungs.

“F-fuck, Keeho—!”

He groans through clenched teeth, one hand gripping your hip, the other sliding between your legs. His fingers find your clit and rub—messy, fast, relentless.

“You feel that?” he growls, hips snapping forward, balls slapping against you with each thrust. “You’re dripping all over me, baby.”

You bury your face in the sheets, gasping, hands fisting the fabric like it’s the only thing keeping you from completely unraveling. The rhythm is overwhelming—his dick hitting the deepest parts of you while his fingers work your clit in circles that make your thighs quake.

“God, Keeho—I’m gonna—fuck—”

“I got you,” he says, voice tight. “Come for me. Wanna feel you.”

And you do. Hard. Your back arches, a guttural moan ripped from your throat as your orgasm slams into you, stars bursting behind your eyes. Your pussy flutters around him, slick and tight, and he curses under his breath, pulling out just enough to slam back in.

Then, suddenly, he slows—shifts his grip, leans forward—and flips you onto your back once more.

You blink up at him, chest heaving, mind hazy with aftershocks. He’s staring down at you, sweaty hair falling in his face, eyes wild and soft all at once.

“This is the last time,” he mutters, like he’s trying to convince himself.

You nod, lips parted, heart still racing.

“Yeah,” you lie, again.

But he doesn’t move. Doesn’t thrust. Just kisses you—slow, deep, tongues tangled and teeth clashing as his body molds to yours. His dick rests inside you, pulsing. You feel full and stretched and achingly sensitive, but the kiss makes it worse, makes you want more.

His forehead rests against yours. “I hate this.”

You grab his face with both hands, breathing hard. “Then fuck me like you hate me.”

He groans—loud, broken—and then he moves.

His hips slam forward, hard and fast, and the stretch hits different from this angle. His chest brushes your nipples with every thrust, one hand holding yours above your head, the other tangled in your hair or gripping your thigh, switching with each sharp snap of his hips.

“You drive me fucking crazy,” he growls, eyes locked on yours as you moan under him.

Your back arches, your legs wrap around his waist, and every thrust hits that sweet spot so deep it knocks the air out of you.

You’re not quiet anymore. You’re gasping, begging, eyes rolling, nails digging into his back. And he’s just as gone—muttering curses, praising your pussy, kissing your lips, your throat, your cheek.

“Look at me,” he pants, holding your jaw. “Wanna see your face when you come.”

You do—eyes glassy, lips trembling—and the second your walls start fluttering again, he growls through gritted teeth.

“Fuck—y/n—shit—”

You both come together. It’s messy, loud, overwhelming. Your legs lock tight around him as you tremble, and he buries his face in your neck as his hips stutter, warmth spilling into you.

[ayukaze]

MY DEPRESSION HAS BEEN CURED MY SKIN IS CLEAR MY CROPS ARE FLOURISHING ALL BECAUSE OF THIS ONE IMAGE THIS IS THE YEAR OF ADVENTURE PANDERING LETS FUCKIN GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Let's break this down one by one ~

This is such a good Sora fit I don't even know how to explain how very much OG Sora this is, the pink tones of the overall sporty outfit perfectly capture all levels of her personality. To top it off she's sharing flower themed cream sandwiches with Piyomon AAAHHH the subtle reference okay merch team you can take a w. Not to mention Sora is perfectly matching with Taichi and the fruit in her sandwich is orange stoooopppp itttt!!!!!

TAICHI OMG who is dressing this boy because that's the most he's ever jocked as a 11 year old. The sweatshirt, cargo pants, matching wristband and the sense to put his goggles down, he is winning the sporty casual fashion show for sure. And of course him and Agumon are enjoying some chicken popcorn, love how they weren't even subtle with the packaging art we all know Japan's favourite fried chicken brand anyway 🤣

Yamato. YAMATO. Y A M A T O. You're 11 can you tone down the cool guy heartthrob behaviour for a minute because I am losing my mind THE DOGTAG CHAIN IM GONNA SCREEAAAMMM ACTUALLY I AM SCREAAAMING AAAAHHHHHHH. He looks so good, there is absolutely no wrong element in his entire outfit, everything is perfectly paired up, a fashionista is among us. The little thumbs up over the onigiri that Gabumon is offering him?? Is he telling Gabumon that he's okay with having one and Gabumon can have the rest because that's the sweet, protective, kind, caring baby he is at heart???🥹🥹🥹The blue and green gradient in the background tho?? Mimato math is mathing bestiesss 🤣

Takeru is just a lil guy, but such a perfect lil guy!!! I like how his outfit has the similar green shade as his anime outfit but they still chose to gave him a new beanie instead which doesn't really match the colour tone of the rest of the fit but it's Takeru so we know that he can pull any hat off and that's what he does!!! Him and Patamon sharing burgers, okay mood, but why is he looking so surprised? I need to know what happened, did he spill some sauce on his overalls? Was the burger too hot to bite? WHAT HAPPENED TAKERU????? 😢

Jou, I see you paired up the plaid pants with a nice long, muted, warm toned jacket BUT I SEE THAT PURPLE SHIRT POKING IN FROM INSIDE and excuse me sir but why that purple with the plaid 😭 I need to see a version where Jou isn't wearing the jacket so I can make an informed rating on this outfit but may I add that in the full merch pic he has paired this look with green and white sneakers...I cannot defend you I am sorry Jou, please try brown loafers next time 😭 But outfit aside, Jou eating a taiyaki with Gomamon is lowkey funny I just know that Gomamon cracked a Marching Fishes joke at least once.

Koushiro...I will not go into detail but I will say it's cute that you have a sweater with a little K on it, it's also very cute that there is a splash of orange in your outfit, who's attention are you vying for it isn't subtle at all bby boy and I am grateful you matched your shoes to your sweater even if the socks are definitely a choice and that blue with orange is also definitely another choice. Good to see your are making choices. I like that him and Tentomon are sharing dango, it's always nice to see Koushiro's fondness towards Japanese traditional snacks hinted at in some way.

MIMI. QUEEN. SLAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!!!! YOU NEVER EVER MISS MY SWEET BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL. The pastel tones matched with the grey stockings for contrast, that beret and the fuzzy hem boots, you just know she shops at Takashimaya and Isetan and anything below it will just not do 👏🏻 Plus Sora and Mimi are wearing the same tones, which probably means that they pre-planned the outfits together, cuties!!! Also Crepe is such a Mimi™️ choice of dessert but I always get teary eyes when I see Palmon mimic Mimi's gestures, there is just so much love and admiration between them for each other, pure childish wonder 💚 And the crepe even has a cutesy character face on it, which kinda looks like Monzaemon, though I can't be sure but if it is then another win for a subtle reference. Not to mention both Yamato and Mimi look like they've dressed in a more cool and elegant style than the rest like they might be on their way to a date THE MIMAT MATH IS MATHING YALLL!!!

Hikari looks super cute, I think there isn't much official art of her in casual clothing for OG stuff so it's nice to see her in a more cutesy fit suited to her age. The hairband matching the cardigan is such a nice touch!! I can't recall any other casual outfit for OG design Hikari except the War Game and Memorial Party dress, so I think this would be the first time we see Hikari with a hairband and it just looks adorable. Of course she is sharing an ice cream with Tailmon, it's kinda their brand now but like Takeru she's making a surprised expression, perhaps she wasn't expecting Tailmon to offer her a bite of her ice cream?

To conclude, this is probably the best OG artwork we've gotten since Idk maybe the Rainy Day stationery series. This will be sold in advance at the Kamio Store booth at Anime Japan 2024. No other details were mentioned, but the event booth sale feels like a pre-sale before the goods become available more widely at other outlets, hopefully, at some stores that international fans have access too as well.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

Ayushi out.

[kaciidubs]

Camboy!SKZ Headcanons | Hyung Line

❣ Summary: What it would be like if the SKZ boys were camboys? An idea brought on by @onmykneesforchanlix ❣ ❣ Warnings: Camboy AU, kink discussion [daddy kink], sex toys ❣ ❣ Additional Tags: Slight crack energy, Chan is referred to as Chris, Changbin is a gym buff ❣ Maknae Line ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist ❣

Chris

His username would be something painfully simple, like cb97xx or xxWolfChanxx, he’s never escaping the early 2000’s username tropes, I’m sorry.

Started camming to save money for music tech, and he was gonna quit once he earned enough money but he slowly found himself getting hooked on the praise of thousands of unknown faces.

At first he didn’t show his face, keeping the content to shoulders and below, but one night he gets up to turn the stream off and they catch a glimpse of his lips and there’s a rapid fire of tips flooding in;

Would give anything to have those lips on me

What the fuck what the fuck??? Those lips?? So biteable??

Bubblegum pink, new favorite color

From then on, he kept his camera at an angle just high enough to keep his lips in frame.

Definitely finds himself pandering to the daddy kink side of the internet and ends up developing the kink for himself [this is a lie, he knows he’s had it since before the cam boy streams, but who really needs to know that?].

Loves when his fans comment on how good his hands look bc he doesn’t find them appealing himself, but if hundreds of people are begging him to choke them, how could he deny it?

Paints his nails by the recommendation of his subscribers each month, and it turns him on even more when he’s camming and jerking off with his freshly dried polish.

Wants to grow his community and isn’t shy about collaborations with other creators because baby boy is just a social butterfly - no matter if they’re clothed or naked in front of thousands.

Ultimately treats his lives like a genuine livestream, even if his dick is leaking precum in his fist.

Minho

First off; username is leeknowswho, convince me otherwise - man did not care about his username in the slightest

Only made an account to support his other streaming friend, quokkasungie

But when he saw the money he was raking in, he decided to throw his hat into the ring because “Getting off in front of a camera? How hard can it be?”

Spoiler alert - very.

Extremely, when you don’t even use a webcam.

The first few streams were experimental, a black screen with the subtle sound of him jerking off and breathing into the mic - that is, until he read out a chat asking for a description.

“What? So needy you can’t imagine it for yourself?”

Apparently the chatter liked that, and so did a grand number of people after that on his next stream.

Thus, the leeknowswho degradation corner was born, and it’s been a hit for two years and growing.

Constantly teases his viewers, toying with them that maybe one day he’ll turn on his camera, and even going as far as setting a donation goal for him to do so - but the limit is never reached since he often takes part of the money to donate to charities.

“You’d rather see my dick than an organization help get stray kittens off the streets? Yet I’m the fucked up one?”

Sometimes he goes live and doesn’t even jerk off, just doing an asmr stream teasing and degrading and toying with his fans, getting a kick out of the ones actively using his voice to get themselves off.

He’s a menace but the people love him.

Changbin

BinnieDwekki or Dwekkisgym, I really can’t decide but he definitely gives off cute username vibes.

Genuinely wanted to use the platform as a way to document his growth from working out, but of course using a camboy website probably wasn’t the way to go about it.

Has a whole room for his setup - though in reality it’s just his in-home workout room, but who really needs to know the truth - and takes pride in showing off his whole body.

He worked hard for those muscles, why wouldn’t he want to flex in every angle?!

Blushes at the chat messages where people say they want him to choke him with his biceps, or squeeze their head between his thighs until they pop like a watermelon.

Blushes even more at the chats praising his physique and wondering how someone with such a cute face could have such a killer body.

The first time he pulled his dick out on stream was when he was showcasing some of the workouts he does on the daily; the adrenaline and built up energy from his preworkout giving the chat a glorious reveal of the thick outline in his compression shorts.

Fuck choking me with your arms, choke me out on your cock

There wasn’t much left to the imagination, and with the addition of that chat message he figured that maybe taking care of the problem on stream wouldn’t be a bad idea.

And boy, was it the best decision he’d ever made.

If his fans weren’t on board for the strained grunts and breathless groans from him working out on camera, then they definitely were for the dick that looked just as beefy as he was.

His version of being a camboy is probably the most wholesome out there, ranging from motivational talks and advice moments [while shirtless, of course] to being stark naked and jacking off after a live workout session.

Hyunjin

Another one who signed up with intent - and hear me out.

He wanted to use the money to help get him into art school, but after seeing his first major check after the span of a few months, he figured he could get on well without it.

Username is princehhj, he knows how to pander to his features which helped him grow a fanbase like it was nothing.

Has been camboying the longest out of the hyung line.

He also has a set for his streams, but it’s just a corner of his art studio where he has a cozy little couch where he can stretch out on [in more ways than one].

His streams usually involve toys of various types; silicon grinders, fleshlights, buttplugs, dildos - his collection isn’t one to joke about, only using his hand got boring after the first week of streaming.

Most of the time he doesn’t even have to be doing anything explicit, simply sitting there with his pretty black hair tied back into a ponytail, a bottle of lube and a toy or two sitting right beside him is enough for the donations to come rolling in.

His favorite toy to use is his tenga egg - the stretchy plastic egg fits perfectly in his palm and doesn’t take too much concentration to use, which makes it easier for him to read his chat and reply as if he’s not touching himself.

Aside from the toys, however, he may also have one or two sets of lingerie that he brings out on milestone streams as a treat to the scream [and himself]. Nothing too wild, just your simple lace panty set and garters, and the chat goes wild for it.

Can you truly blame them though? He’s the prettiest prince out there.

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