#i might not tho. just watch me be stubborn and refusing to do it

[forgaeven1]

me, realising i need to queue my replies because my drafts and asks are steadily at 30

[amyispxnk]

And if you were my little girl

Summary - your dad sucks and you finally turn to Joel for help (summaries are my specialty can you tell)

A/N: SO my dad’s being a little bitchy and making me genuinely want to unalive a little bit, I remembered this song existed, Joel is the father we all wish we had, and here we are. Also I’ve (fortunately) never had to deal with an alcoholic so I’m sorry if it’s not written very well?

Pairing: platonic/father figure!Joel Miller x f!reader (can probably be read as gn tho?)

Word count: 2.3k

Warnings: paternal issues (i refuse to say daddy sorry), alcohol mention, language, angst, comfort, a lot of tears, father Joel, implications of using certain methods to get things you want, verbal/physical abuse, blood

DO NOT COPY THIS FIC IN ANY WAY PLS AND TY.

Part 2 here

You reckoned you had stopped really taking the words in that he tried to threaten you with a long time ago, letting the curses and attempts to break you apart in through one ear and straight out the other. That way you wouldn’t be able to linger on them for too long; it was better that way.

“Where’s the fuckin’ drinks?” Your dad yelled, stumbling around the kitchen and throwing open the shelves in his search, met with nothing but dust. You skated around him as best you could but after he had almost torn apart the wood trying to find the alcohol, he turned to you.

Red in the face, sweating furiously with a look that could definitely kill you. Hands balled at his sides as he took a step towards you.

“D’you hide it again?” He said menacingly, trying to instil as much fear as he could into you, desperate for the liquid relief.

This time, you hadn’t hidden it. You knew better than to try and help him anymore, he couldn’t be fixed and you had to just accept it. When you were younger, when you were more stupid, more hopeful, you had tried hiding it or disposing of it in secret to try and discourage his alcoholism - only to be met with a split lip and hundreds of salty tears spilling from your eyes, only to be ignored and discarded and yelled at and told you were useless before being sent out to go get more. Sometimes without money, him saying that you’d just have to find another way to get it.

You were so disgusted with the prospect of what he was surely insinuating, but thinking about what he might do if you came back empty-handed was somehow scarier to you at the time.

“Fucking answer me!” He snarled, pulling you up by your collar and glaring at you.

“I didn’t hide it- there’s none left, and there’s no way to get any right now. If you just calm-” You began, trying to keep your voice steady and your face void of too much emotion. You weren’t going to let him do anything. He didn’t scare you anymore.

“Well you best fuckin’ find some, you bitch!” He shoved you towards the door, knocking you onto the hard wooden floor in the process and watching you cry out in pain without so much as batting an eye, too fucking stubborn to even feel any remorse since he was always fucking right about everything like he was now.

“Don’t think about coming back here unless you find me it.” And with that, he slammed the door in your face, leaving you outside the apartment door in the hallway.

You let out a shaky exhale, hands raising and covering your face as you furiously wiped away any tears that threatened to spill. Your hands balled up in your face as you hit your head over and over. You had to think of something. No matter how much of a poker face you put on in front of him, you were still terrified deep down, that feeling would never go away no matter how long you’d been putting up with it for.

You ran through all of your usual options, but you genuinely couldn’t think of one that would work today. It was nearly impossible to get your hands on alcohol in the apocalypse with ration cards, without them you had to resort to other means and you couldn’t bring yourself to do that right now.

Just when you thought that all hope was lost, the familiar and far-too-comforting Southern drawl of Joel Miller sounded from across the hallway.

“Y’alright sweetheart?” He asked cautiously. He had heard some banging coming from your apartment and had opened the door to find you standing there, tugging at your hair in frustration and looking like you were about to explode.

You turned to face him, opening your mouth to speak but not really knowing what to say.

How many times had this happened? How many times had your own father terrorised you for any minor inconvenience and blamed you for everything, made you feel stupid and worthless of any attention or love? And how many times had Joel still given you that attention, that love, or whatever it was. Maybe it was love, maybe he was just being nice to you, but you told yourself that’s what love was since you knew no better. Growing up in this world was cruel enough, but without anyone who truly loved you and liked to make sure you knew that every day, nobody to protect you from the monsters - infected and human - that inhibited it, that felt like the worst fate you could suffer.

So were you alright? No. No, of course you weren’t. But you’d say you were just like you had every time, because you didn’t want to bother people with your ‘issues’. As well as numbing yourself from feeling any intense fear or sadness as a result of your father’s endless torment, you also found it incredibly difficult to take pity on yourself. You always felt like your issues were never that real, that your father had a hard life and maybe you should just let him take it out on you.

“I’m..” you began, mustering up a pathetic excuse for a smile as you glanced from his face to the ground in front of your feet, “I’m fine, thank you.”

You knew the exact expression which would be on his face without even needing to look up, having seen it too many times. That one where he looks worried, his brows furrowed as he tries to pick you apart and figure out what the hell was actually going on, slightly angry too as this kept on happening and you still refused to tell him anything. Did you not trust him? Did he do something wrong? He knew he was threatening to people, that’s what he was known for in the QZ. But he had never done anything to you, he’d always tried helping you but you never talked or anything at all with him.

“Do you um- do you have any beer? Any alcohol would be fine really, I just need it right now. I can pay you but I don’t have any ration cards so it would have to be later on unless you could think of anything…” You trailed off at the end, not wanting to say it and give him the option in case he hadn’t thought of it yet, praying he wouldn’t want that.

“Yeah, I got some.” He murmured, before blinking a few times and opening the door to his apartment again, cogs turning in his brain as he still tried to figure out what happened.

“Come in, don’t need ya standin’ there like a lemon.” He said when you stayed fixed to the ground beneath you instead of following him inside like he had very clearly offered when he left the door open after walking in himself.

“Right.” You nodded as you entered his apartment, closing the door gently behind you and watching him as he went over to his cabinets and reached for some whiskey.

You took in his living space. It was clean, organised. The small entryway led straight into the living room which was linked to the kitchen space, a dusty couch in the centre of the room and a coffee table in front of it. A few books were on the table, along with some slightly cracked glasses. You never took Joel to be much of a reader, clearly you were wrong.

There were 2 more doors which were closed and you could only assume that they were the bathroom and his bedroom.

“Hope this ‘s okay.” He said as he appeared in front of you, bottle of whiskey in hand.

“You’re not drinkin’ this all by yourself, are ya?” A smirk appeared on his face as he attempted the light teasing with you, maybe that would cheer you up a bit.

Your expression bore a smile which faltered and faded quickly. If only he knew.

“No, no. It’s for my dad. He ran out so.. Yeah. How do you want me to pay?” You said quietly. Whatever it took, you supposed.

He noticed the dejected look on your face as you looked up at him. So tired. That’s what came to mind whenever he looked at you. Barely an adult and already looking like you were at death’s door whenever he saw you. Exhaustion clouded all of your features and your mind when you trudged up the stairs, down the corridor and up to your apartment door, entering as your shoulders somehow slumped even more.

“Y’ don’t needa pay, sweetheart.” He told you, and you blinked a few times in confusion.

“Really?” There was no way. Alcohol was so hard to come by, and here he was giving you a bottle for free?

“Yeah.” He nodded, making sure you had a good hold on the bottle before letting go of it and pursing his lips as he thought deeply yet again.

“‘F you ever need to talk or anythin’, I’m always here for ya, okay?” He said before you could leave, making you stop with your back towards him as you stood at the door.

“Thank you, Joel.” You whispered before leaving and returning to your own apartment.

After that, you found yourself on Joel’s doorstep a few more times - you didn’t go every time you needed something, not wanting him to think you were taking advantage of his kindness, so sometimes you were just genuinely hanging out with him.

He had some little books and crosswords, stories to tell you, and one time he’d even come across a VHS tape with a movie from the dawn of time on it which the two of you had watched one evening.

You stayed too late and definitely paid the price for it, but it was worth it, you told yourself as you cleaned the blood from your arms and hissed at the sting of a newly-formed bruise.

Then, one evening, it finally fell apart. He threw you out of the house, quite literally, and you were already knocking on Joel’s door before you could realise what you were doing.

He opened the door and you slammed yourself into him, causing him to let out a little cough as he stumbled back, arms tentatively wrapping around you.

“Woah, woah, y’alright sweetheart?” He asked, taken aback by your sudden action.

“Joel, I- I'm sorry.” You choked out, tightening your hold on him and fisting his shirt.

He ushered you gently into his apartment, closing the door behind you and sitting you down on the couch.

“What's goin��� on? What happened?” He said, watching as you trembled, lip quivering as you tried to formulate a sentence without bursting into tears.

You ultimately failed at that. Only managing the words my dad before a pained sob wracked through your entire body and you were crying into your palms.

Joel rushed to your side, pulling you into him and rubbing his hands up and down your back soothingly.

“‘s okay. You can talk to me, tell me what's goin’ on honey.” He told you, pulling back slowly from you to try and make you look at him, frown deepening on his face when he saw how upset you were.

“He- he- kicked me out, ‘cause I didn't- I lost the cards and- he got too angry at me so then- I was mad at him back and he hurt me so I said I didn't want to stay and he-” You stuttered, trying to actually remember what had happened in the first place then explain it as best you could.

His jaw clenched with anger. How could someone do that to their own child? Your father had clearly put you through so much emotionally and physically, and you had done nothing wrong. You were a good kid, and you deserved better than that. He could be better for you.

Your shaky breathing filled the room as he came back to his senses, willing his fury to stop clouding his head so he could focus on what was more important right now - you. He'd deal with him later.

His thumb reached up and wiped a stray tear from your face before he pulled you close again, hugging you tight.

“You stay here, okay? ‘m so sorry sweetheart. I won't let anythin’ bad happen to ya. Y’just gotta let me help you.” He said as you nodded into his shirt, a weak mm-hm muffled by the fabric before he slowly rose from the couch and walked into his kitchen.

He came back with a glass of water, offering it to you. “Drink this.” Your cautious fingers closed around it and brought it to your lips.

“‘s gonna be okay. You can stay here, if you want?” You had come to him, obviously hoping he'd ask you that, but hearing him actually say it gave you relief like nothing else could.

“Y-yes, please.” You said, putting the glass back down on the coffee table as he nodded, helping you up and taking you to his room.

“I'll stay out there on the couch for a bit, okay? ‘til we can sort somethin’ a little more proper out for ya.” He told you, going to find you some clothes that weren't almost completely torn up.

When he returned, he saw you blankly staring at the floor, hands fingering the same strand of hair mindlessly and not even realising him walking up to you.

He sighed, handing you the clothes and placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“It'll be okay sweetheart. Nothin’ bads gonna happen anymore, he can't hurt you here.” He assured you, hugging you one more time before he left, closing the bedroom door behind him.

Thank you sm for reading, I hope you enjoyed! Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated and requests are open 💞

[pikuna]

Yokai Heart - Chapter 3

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Fandoms: Dandadan (Anime), Dandadan (Manga)

Relationship: Ayase Momo/Takakura “Okarun” Ken

Characters: Ayase Momo, Takakura “Okarun” Ken

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Inspired by Dragonheart (Dragonheart), Youkai Takakura “Okarun” Ken, Yokarun, Shrine Maiden Momo, Protective Takakura “Okarun” Ken, BAMF Ayase Momo, Canon-Typical Violence, Action & Romance, Romantic Fluff, Interspecies Romance, Aged-Up Characters, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Feudal Japan, Historical Fantasy

Summary

With the last of her family passing away, Momo had nothing to her name but spiritual powers no one can know about.

To escape her fate as concubine to the local Shogun, she leaves her birth town and becomes a Wandering Miko.

But as an untrained Shrine Maiden she had no luck fulfilling her expected duties and she refuses to entertain men for money.

Surely a con act together with the Yokai she had sealed a pact with was a good alternative, right?

This chapter is very conversation heavy, but those two have a lot to talk about and getting to know each other!

Thanks to my Beta @xylveon700 as always. ❤️

Ao3 Link

Previous Chapter | Start | Next Chapter

Treating your own wound with just one hand was more tricky than Momo had anticipated. Granted, the Yokai had offered her his help, but she refused it. She was an adult, she could take care of herself. But after having to endure his pleading eyes, she relented and allowed him to help her cut the bandages with his sharp claws. And that was all!

While wrapping her arm, she kept glancing over to him. He had sat down across from her, their knees almost touching in the small space of the cave, and just watched her patiently. The longer she could feel no threat from him, the more relaxed she became. Absently she wondered if she had seen an illustration of his kind before. Somehow those red eyes, the hair and maw looked...familiar? She just couldn't put a finger on it, so she shoved it into the back of her mind.

"You're a stubborn one," he said amused when she finally tied the bandage with one hand and her teeth.

"Thanks for noticing," she chirped in a fake sweet voice, before she got her medical supply ready again. "Give me your right hand," she demanded.

"What for?" he asked with a raised eyebrow, but still held the requested hand towards her, which she immediately grabbed. "Because I stabbed you. That must...hurt?" Her sentence had started out annoyed, but as soon as she took a look at his hand she stopped. Instead of a fresh stab wound, she only found a scar across his palm.

"Ah. That won't be a problem," he said. Too confused about this, she missed the softness in his eyes and voice. "Appreciate the concern tho."

"How?" she mumbled, staring at his palm she still held in hers as if she waited for it to give her an answer. Absently she noticed how his fingers were more like claws and were tinted black. "I'm sure I pierced through your hand when it was still a claw and I saw it bleeding when you turned back."

"You did and really hurt," he halfheartedly whined, but Momo just glared at him, so he tried to appease her with an attempt at an answer. "We Yokai are more resilient than you humans."

"I know that." she huffed and tapped her sword that was attached to her thin belt. "But this is a blessed sword. I know that Yokai have better healing abilities, but weapons like this should stop you from healing so fast."

"Good point." He looked at his hand and flexed it in her hold experimentally, talking more to himself than her. "Haven't been attacked by a blessed weapon until this day, so I don't know. Also usually don't get scars. Might be that the dragon's curse has something to do with it."

"Dragon's curse?"

His eyes met hers and he nodded. "Turning into a dragon is not one of my...natural abilities."

The Yokai didn't elaborate at first, but Momo's curiosity was piqued. She let go of his hand and leant back against the wall of the cave and made him understand, with a little wave of her hand, that she would like for him to continue. He heeded her unspoken request with a sigh as he settled back on his side.

"It started to happen every full moon for a year now. Unfortunately, I have no memory of how it happened." She quirked an eyebrow at that, but he ignored it. "I visited the area where I first came into existence. Next thing I knew was that I was not...myself anymore. When the dragon takes over, I'm not in control. No amount of fighting it got me free. This was the first time I turned back before the curse allowed it."

"I know of people getting cursed by evil spirits, but never that a Yokai itself got cursed," she murmured, hand on her chin in a musing gesture. Then she gave him a side eye. "You sure you don't just lie through those big teeth of yours?"

"I swear on the favorite pincushion of my grandmother," he said in an absolutely deadpan voice, having one hand on his heart and holding up the other.

Was...was he making a joke? Momo certainly could see the mirth glinting in his eyes and she couldn't help herself but to chuckle.

"You are a funny one, huh?"

"Thanks for noticing," he said with a purr, mimicking her earlier fake sweet sentence.

Momo was torn between being infuriated about this Yokai not taking this more seriously and being...amused.

"Okay, okay. Let's say I believe that you are the victim of a curse and that you conveniently cannot remember how you got it-" he hummed affirmative "-what was that attack about? Why the peach field?"

"What can I say?" he just shrugged. "I like peaches."

On the outside Momo just looked unimpressed at him, her slight shake the only indicator of what was going on inside. It was so hard for her to suppress a laugh. A lot of boys had tried to woo her with phrases regarding peaches and her. And this poor guy probably did the cheesiest of them all. It was hilarious, but also endearing, since he did it unintentionally.

With her just staring at him, he let out a sigh.

"Look Miko-san. It's not like I can just stroll to the market and buy some. The lord who owns these fields is a cruel bastard, so I don't feel bad for stealing some of his."

"And what about the farmers? There was no need to rampage as a dragon when you know you would turn during the full moon."

"I...might have forgotten about...that," he said sheepishly. Momo just stared at him for a moment.

"Haaah?" She leapt forward, grabbing him by the collar and shaking him in anger. "How in the hells can you forget something like that?"

He just let her shake him and leant his head away from her, trying to look nonchalant while doing so.

"They were about to harvest the peaches. Not much time to steal, too focused on that," he tried to explain himself with a whine. She gave him another good shake before she let go of him and huffed.

"And people complain that I only ever think with my stomach."

As if on command, her stomach started to growl like a wild beast. Embarrassed by her body's betrayal, she turned away from the Yokai. Looked like whatever little effect the stale bread had from earlier had vanished after the exhausting fight.

An amused hum came from him. She was about to bark at him, but she noticed that his eyes were glowing. So were the stripes on his face and hair. Ghostly flames emitted from the collar and tail end of his robe.

Momo tensed, feeling his previously calm aura flaring up, her hand ready to pull out her blade. Was he about to attack her? But he still looked relaxed, despite his glowing eyes, and she could feel only...concern?

"Wait a moment," he said, before he was...just gone. A gust of wind inside the cave was the only indicator that he didn't just disappear, but moved very quickly.

Where in the hells was he going? And was that speed one of his own abilities? She remembered the dragon was also able to zoom around very fast. Probably not as fast due to the larger body.

She just hoped he would actually come back. So far he seemed to be very obedient for whatever reason and didn't seem to harbor any ill intentions towards her. Mulling over his story, Momo wondered what she should do about him. She was glad that she didn't kill him, as he was just a victim of a curse. But he seemed to be careless, his hunt for peaches almost costing several people their lives. Should she help him get rid of the curse? If it truly was coming from a dragon, then it was a powerful one, something that couldn't be exorcised so easily. Not that she was an expert in the first place. And they barely had any information about the nature of the curse. Could you even exorcise something out of a Yokai without exorcising itself too?

Lost in her thoughts, she didn't hear the sound of him running back and got startled when he suddenly stopped at the entrance of the cave in a little cloud of dust he kicked up. The Yokai entered with a chuckle at her clearly alarmed state and held...a peach towards her. Now that Momo looked closer, he had a few dozen of them in his arms. She looked from the fruit in his hand to his face with a frown.

"You can't be serious."

He just raised an eyebrow at her. "Why not? You seem hungry." As she kept just frowning at him, he sighed and sat down on his side. "There are plenty of trees on the field. They won't miss a few fruits."

"I am not eating stolen food!" she insisted and turned her head away. Since she was so stubborn, he gave up and just shrugged.

"Suit yourself."

Momo could hear a krack noise and when she looked at him from the corner of her eyes, she could see how he had opened his maw and just threw the previously offered peach into the black abyss. Certainly not how the inside of a mouth should look like. She kept watching him with morbid curiosity closing his maw. There was no movement from it, only his cheeks indicated that he was somehow chewing.

A deep, appreciative and satisfied hum came from him. Apparently the peach must’ve tasted very good. Momo wondered how good actually.

Her stomach grumbled again. One of his closed eyes opened to look at her.

"W-what about the previous nights?" she tried to distract from the fact that she was starving. "Several hunters went out to get you and that was before the full moon."

"Wasn't me," the Yokai raised his hands in defense, the fruits all stored in his lap. "Those were Kamaitachi. Had to keep those little scoundrels from stealing all the good fruits and hurting the humans."

Kamaitachi would actually explain the cuts the hunters would turn up with. And those little Yokai were also known for being quite fast. He probably protected the hunters from a worse fate than just cuts. His aura was calm as usual, his enjoyment of the fruit palpable.

An even louder and now painful growl of her stomach. His eyes and aura both oozed with concern.

"...You said the lord who owned these fields is a bastard?" Momo asked him with a small voice.

"Treats the farmers like cattle and likes to invite the more beautiful wives and daughters from his workers to his estate." Her stomach churned for a different reason. The Yokai tried it again to offer her a fruit. "If it helps to ease your conscience even more, just see it as your payment for saving the farmers. I'm certainly grateful you stopped me Miko-san."

That was the last bit convincing she needed. Not that he had to do much, her hunger was about to consume any morality she had tried to uphold until this moment. She practically snatched the fruit out of his claws and bit into it immediately. It was delicious! So sweet and the morning dew still clung to its skin, making it even more juicy. Her delight must have been visible on her face, as he chuckled and held several more fruits to her that she took from him. The smug expression in his eyes frustrated her a bit.

"As you should. But you don't own these peaches," she groused and bit into the fruit again. She continued talking, while chewing, pointing an accusing finger at him. "Also, stop calling me Miko-san, I have a name!"

"Well, what is the fair lady's name then?" he asked with a mocking half bow to her, before he threw another peach into his maw. She absolutely picked up on that sarcastic tone towards her bad table manners. An eyebrow twitched in irritation, but then her grin became mischievous.

"Ayase. Ayase Momo." She emphasized her given name.

At first the Yokai just nodded. But when the realization of the meaning of her name hit him, his eyes went wide and he started coughing. Momo tried to hide a snicker behind her hand. She had hoped for a reaction like that.

"M-Momo you say?" he wheezed after he was able to catch his breath, thumbing his chest to get the wrongly swallowed fruit pieces out. She could feel how flustered his aura became. Absently she wondered why it was so easy for her to read his emotions like this. Normally she had to concentrate to even get an inkling how a person was truly feeling. But that was a mystery for later. For now she enjoyed his ruffled state.

"You heard right," she said again in her fake sweet voice. "Don't worry about your comment. Heard worse from guys trying to win me over."

Yep, he absolutely was hacking even more now.

"I-I was not-" he stammered, but was not able to finish the sentence, as she barely could keep her cackling down. He flashed her an angry look, his cheeks clearly a darker shade now. She resisted the urge to point this out to him. Instead, she mercifully let him finish his coughing fit, before she spoke again.

"In any case, it's still Ayase-san for you. We're not that close, so no need to drop the formalities."

"Apologies, Ayase-san," he grumbled, lacing her name with as much sarcasm as he could muster in that moment. Now that he had calmed down again, his attention went to the last peach in his hand, apparently contemplating.

But Momo could see that past his apparently relaxed facade, his aura was still swirling in embarrassment. Again she wondered why it was so easy for her to read him. Was it because he was a Yokai? They were known to have a higher intensity of emotions.

Suddenly he sighed in exasperation.

"Enough with that."

His eyes met her gaze, glowing again in that intense red. Before Momo could ask what he meant, she felt a mental shove that was so strong that her body was jerking back. Her aura sense was pressed back into her own mental space with a force she had never experienced before.

"What the hell did you do?" she gasped in confusion.

"Kicking you out. No idea how a human is able to touch aura like you do, but I let you snoop around, so you could see I'm no threat." His eyes narrowed when she tried to feel his aura again and instead was met with a mental wall around it. "But you're being rude and I would like my privacy back."

"I am not rude!" she said coarsely. He snorted at that comment, before his eyes darted away from her.

"Disrobing me would have been less rude than what you did," he grumbled rather quietly, his cheeks gaining a darker tint again.

"What?" Now it was Momo's turn to flush. Why the hells would he say something like that? He was clearly uncomfortable, so it was not a joke. "W-what do you mean by that?"

Clearly not wanting to answer the question directly, he huffed through his nose and deflected: "How would you feel if someone would come barging into your mind and read you like an open book?"

She would be furious, that was for sure. And...she understood his comparison now, which made her feel hot from embarrassment. Like a child that got caught with their hand in the cookie jar, she tried to shove the blame away from herself.

"Then why didn't you stop me in the first place?" she growled.

"Like I said, to prove to you that I'm not an enemy. And because you humans are usually not able to interact with aura like that. Took me by surprise."

Momo scoffed at that, in her opinion, very weak argument. Riled up by her flurry of emotions, anger and shame, she stood up and glared at him.

"So it's all my fault or what? I had no idea what I was doing!"

Apparently fed up with her bratty behavior, as he also stood up and yes, he was definitely towering over her when not slouching. Not that she was intimidated in the slightest.

"That was quite obvious by the way you acted like an elephant in a tea shop, stomping around in my mind like you owned the place!" he growled back at her.

She couldn't help herself but smirk. Apologizing or admitting that she did something wrong was not her strong suit. Fighting and squabbling? That was a better problem solver for her.

"Don't give me that tone, mister. Or I'll show you what these hands truly can do!"

On command, two spectral hands formed from her back when she went into a fighting stance. He mirrored her, his battle ready gaze sending a rather pleasant shiver down her spine. But before either of them made their first move, his eyes changed to curious and his pose relaxed again.

"How do you do that anyway?"

"Pardon?" she asked, partly confused what he meant and partly because she was disappointed he didn't seem to want to fight.

"Being able to touch auras like you do and creating such tangible limbs from spiritual energy." He poked on one of her spectral hands and gave her an amused side eye. "You sure you're not some kind of spirit yourself?"

"Of course not!" she gasped, not truly offended, but baffled at that ridiculous assumption. "I'm just an ordinary human."

"Nothing is ordinary about you princess," he chuckled. "Especially not these powers of yours."

There was a moment of silence in which both processed how the Yokai had addressed Momo.

"What did you just call me?" she seethed, her eyes full of a fire that made him shrink back down. He did the smart thing and took a few steps towards the entrance, ready to bolt should she decide to strangle him, and just completely ignored her question.

"Just saying, you know about my little dilemma, so I guess it would be only fair if you tell me your little secret." He gave her spectral hands a wary look. "I've seen powerful priests before, but not something like this."

At first Momo didn't want to let it slide that he had called her princess. She was no dainty little damsel for Kami's sake! But she dissolved her spectral hands and gave him a pass. Called it even with her earlier intrusion in his mind. Yes, that sounded just fair.

"Honestly, I have no idea," she answered his question and walked right past him. Outside she turned around to face him again, actively blocking his way to escape. "My grandmother always said that I was blessed by the Kamis and that I am chosen for some grand purpose that I have no fucking clue about," she continued her explanation and waved her hand around, annoyance clear in the gesture and her voice.

"Language Ayase-san," he chuckled, apparently back to being relaxed upon seeing her casual attitude.

With a wide grin on her face she poked his chest. "You don't get to tell me anything."

"Wouldn't dream of it," he said amused and raising his hands in mock surrender. Momo hummed at that in satisfaction. She had to admit, it was nice that he seemed to know when to actually fight her and when to just go along with her antics.

"But yes, that's all I know. I try not to make a big show of my abilities, or some shogun could get the idea to use me, especially the aura reading thing. They would want me to interrogate enemies and allies alike, just to gain the upper hand. Ruthless bastards."

She stopped herself there. Well, if she wasn't the biggest hypocrite in the world. Acting like she had some superior morality and then just went ahead and invaded his mind for her own curiosity. There really hadn't been any reason for her to keep looking after she had made sure he wasn't lying to her. While she was not so good with apologies, he deserved one. As much as she disliked admitting it, she had been rather rude to him, even when he got her something to eat. Calling her princess was not a fair exchange for her trespassing.

She let out a breathless laugh, devoid of any real humor.

"And yet, I just did that to you without thinking. Which...I'm very sorry about," she mumbled, fidgeting with a strand of her hair. Apologizing was the right thing to do. Yet it made her sound so...weak. And that was what she hated about it.

The apology and especially her rather...meek attitude took the Yokai by surprise. Visibly fumbling with what to do, he gave her shoulder an uncertain, but gentle pat.

"It's alright Ayase-san. You didn't know it any better." When she looked at him, with those beautiful eyes that shone with such raw emotions, he quickly retreated his hand and cleared his throat. "Humans probably would never notice if you would touch their aura. We Yokai are just more sensitive to that and only get near each other's aura when we have permission." He paused for a moment holding his massive maw chin thoughtfully. "Which I actually did in a way."

"Huh?" Momo couldn't remember at any point when he gave her explicit permission to do anything like that, unless he counted on nottelling her off in the first place?

"Remember when you pulled my aura out of the dragon's one? That was more than clear consent from me for you to touch my aura. So if anyone is at fault, it is me."

Momo had to snort at that. It certainly was a way to look at the situation. "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"If you want to believe that," he just shrugged and turned away from her. But then he tilted his head slightly back to look at her with one eye. "Does that work?"

The hopeful tone in his voice did it for Momo and she let out a laugh. It was really sweet of him to try and cheer her up. She was glad that he didn't seem to hold her trespassing really against her.

"Maybe. We should just agree we both were at fault with this whole thing."

"A very wise and diplomatic decision," he hummed in agreement, a twinkle in his eyes. "Your smartness rivals your beauty."

It surely was meant as a simple compliment. But Momo couldn't help herself and blush a little at the way he was looking at her while saying this. He probably wasn't even aware how...flirty he sounded. Which was very endearing.

And so easy to tease.

She walked past him back into the cave and winked at him in a coquettish way.

"Careful there, I might get the idea you're actually trying to court me."

As hoped, he immediately started to sputter and stare at her in shock. "I-I wasn't...I'm not..." Only when she couldn't hold herself back anymore and started to cackle uncontrollably, he realized that she was just messing with him. He slouched, his cheek visibly flushing and grumbled under his breath: "Not funny..."

"On the contrary, very funny," she grinned at him, before she knelt down in front of her basket and packed her previously used medical supplies back in it. He just stood in the cave entrance and watched her.

"Soooo, what's the plan for the mighty Yokai huntress?"

Momo snorted. She could hear he was trying to get back at her by giving her that mocking title. Which absolutely failed. At least it was better than him calling her princess again.

"For now? Going back to the village. I want to make sure that the farmers that you attacked-" she pointed an accusing finger at him, but grinned. "-are all okay."

"'m sure they're fine. Didn't get any of them," he mumbled, but still looked guilty to the side. Which made her in turn feel a bit guilty, so she quickly changed the topic.

"And what about you? Do you plan on getting rid of that curse?"

The deep sigh coming from him told her enough. It probably had been on his mind from the moment on since he got cursed, but no success in getting rid of it.

"I would have no idea where to start with that. As you said yourself, cursed Yokai are not very common," he confirmed her thoughts. He then walked up towards her. "And I have a duty for now." Without giving her the time to question what he meant, he picked up the basket and hoisted it on his shoulders.

"Woha, what do you think you're doing?" she asked, disgruntled at him just picking up her belongings like that.

"Carrying your gear, isn't that obvious?" was his only answer, before he went ahead and left the cave.

"Wha-? Hey, wait up!" Momo shouted and scrambled quickly to her feet to follow him. As soon as she caught up with him, she grabbed his arm to stop him in his track. "Why would you carry my stuff? Are you planning on sticking around?"

Tilting his head slightly, he looked at her as if she was not understanding something very simple.

"You beat me in a fight and had all the rights to kill me. But you didn't, so I owe my life to you. Until I can repay this debt, I will follow you around and be of service to you."

"The hells? I did not spare your life so you can become my servant!" Momo's grip on him tightened. She was upset and confused about this. Was it some kind of Yokai thing? "I just wanted to know what your deal was and now that I know that you are just a victim of a curse, I see no reason to kill you. You are your own man...Yokai. I don't accept this!"

Visibly perplexed at her outrage, he just blinked at her, before he let out an amused huff.

"You're really something else Ayase-san. Most humans would be delighted to have a Yokai servant."

"Well, I'm not like most humans," she countered, making him chuckle.

"So very true." He then gently freed his arm from her grip. "It still won't change a thing. I want to get the chance to repay your kindness, one way or the other."

They stared at each other for a solid minute, none of them backing down or even blinking. Momo chewed her bottom lip in frustration. She didn't like the idea of him feeling obligated to do whatever she would tell him. Not that she would ever ask anything he wouldn't want to. But he seemed so earnest with this stupid notion to repay her. And to be honest, she started to like his company from the conversation they had this morning. She didn't want him to be her servant. But maybe....

"I will accept this under one condition," she finally relented and raised her finger.

"Ohh?" He inclined his head in curiosity.

"You will not be my servant or anything like that. You can come with me...as my friend."

With those words she held her hand towards him. This was the most stunned she had seen him so far, his eyes wide and darting between her face and the offered hand.

"...as a friend?" he asked hesitantly, as if he would withdraw the offer if he was too assertive. It was cute and a little bit sad to see that this offer of friendship seemed to almost...scare him? So she gave him her brightest smile.

"Sure, you're alright. You take me seriously and it's fun talking to you."

She had to hold back a giggle when his eyes started to almost sparkle in wonder at her words.

"It's especially fun to tease you," she added with a cheeky grin.

All the wonder vanished from his eyes and he looked deadpanned at her.

"Awww, don't be like that. I promise I won't tease you...much," she giggled, causing him to sigh in defeat. But from the way he eagerly took her hand in his, she knew he didn't really mind it.

"If that's the only way you will let me follow you...Alright, we can be friends."

[diminuel]

Destiel Hanahaki: both of them have it but Cas’s angel powers keep them from growing in his vessel and one of the big issues Cas had as a human all alone was his flowers starting to grow, and it’s another reason he kept stealing Grace even tho it was killing him, the flowers would also without the Grace so might as well right?

And Cas knows Dean has developed it, probably around season 6, so clearly it’s about Lisa. Cas tells Dean about Dean’s affliction when Dean asks him to erase Lisa’s memories but Dean insists (and Dean knows his flowers aren’t for her, they started once he began missing Cas who was being all weird and distant and then the betrayal and then the lake…). Cas heals Dean’s lungs consistently, he’s asked Dean if he wants Castiel to fully remove them like the surgery would, roots and feelings and all, but Dean the stubborn, loving man that Cas knows he is refuses the full procedure, only asks that the symptoms be treated.

(It’s one of the reasons Dean goes so off the rails when Cas dies or disappears, the longer Cas is away the more the flowers strangle his lungs, because contrary to the usual movement of the disease, where being around the object of one’s unrequited love usually speeds up the process, Dean’s flowers are more content when Cas is around and this makes Cas REALLY not suspect they are for him, Dean truly is one of a kind.

Jack watched in curious horror as he watches the roots only he can see slowly strangle Dean as he waters the flowers with bitterness, alcohol, and a broken heart. Sam tries asking Jack to heal his brother, who he watches cough up orchids and extinct flowers, and ancient plants that predate flowers, but there’s nothing the Nephil can do. Billie sent Dean back into the world of the living with a pruning just before Cas’s return, who didn’t see how bad Dean got away from him in such short amount of time. )

When Cas goes to the Empty, he heals Dean one last time, hoping Dean will one day either go find Lisa or have the surgery to finally heal himself, not knowing he’s only delayed Dean’s death by a few months, not by a rusty nail in a barn, but a broken heart and a jungle in his chest.

(Over the years there have been “allies” and enemies and even a desperate Sam that have tried covert, magical, and usually effective ways removing the roots and feelings fully. Crowley, Rowena, Ketch, and even Naomi and Amara have tried demon, witch, MoL, medical, and angelic treatments to either save this idiot against his consent or to sever his connection to Cas, but these treatments, powerful and usually 100% affective, don’t work to their bafflement)

No MCD (at least none that is permanent) allowed on this blog! X3

Hanahaki is a trope that completely passed me by. I vaguely know what it is but I haven't read a fic about it yet.

In any case!! I don't know if Cas would think that Dean's still mourning Lisa that many years on? Also, what would happen to Lisa in this circumstance? Wouldn't Cas have seen that she doesn't have the flowers? (Or doesn't it have to be mutual? Like some sort of soulmate thing?)

But I don't know enough to really contribute ideas to this scenario, apart from the "NO MCD! *Rowena voice* Fix it!" *lol*

[hl-obsessed]

Hey love when are you uploading even in the darkest of the night please don’t feel pressured in any way

Anon my dear! 🥺💕 I'm so happy someone is still waiting for this fic 🥺😊 I can't give you hard date sadly, but know i'm still working at this fic, and i fight really hard to complete it as soon as it will be possible.

I really want to publish something in February, as it will be year since my last fic... so maybe it will be this one...

Feel free to keep asking about it tho! It the best way to give me kick and motivation to work! 😊💕

Aaaaand! You made my day today with this ask and so here you go, especially for you another snippet! 😊💕

(it's not checked and i'm so sorry if this just feels like more teasing 🙈 I really want it to be finished already too, I swear i'm trying)

✨🍃✨🍃✨

"I don't know what you are afraid of Louis. He's up and awake, and as smitten with you as he used to be. You have new bond and being away from your omega will only do harm. To both of you. You will feel the consequences way later than he will. You didn't really hurt him before, no when he doesn't see it that way. No when he doesn't hold it against you. But you will hurt him leaving him now. You hurting him right now staying as far away from him as you can. That's not the way to go, Lou. You have to forgive yourself. You have to let him back, let him close."

Louis doesn't even meet his eyes. As stubborn as he is.

"Weren't you telling me just last week about how you want future with Harry and only him. What changed?"

Louis hungs his head and fidgets with his fingers. "I don't think i deserve it anymore."

"I hate so much that you think that. And you going to hate what I'm going to tell you, but no matter how bad you fell about what you have done, it not yours to decide that. It's his."

(...)

Harry waits next to the car door. Eyes light up when he sees Louis coming and smile tugs at the corners of his lips. "Hi. You ready?"

Louis looks at him, at how happy and carefree he is, like nothing in the world changed. He makes grabby hands for Louis and Louis steps forward on instinct. Harry's hands wrap around his hips, thier foreheads meet.

"Hi, alright?" He ask again.

What Louis can say? That no it's not? That it feels like dying? That it feels like weight of the world is crusing him? That he doesn't think Harry will ever forgive him once he'll go down from his bonding endorphins high? That all this is just begging of the end, and Louis is not sure he's gonna survive it?

He watches him for a while. Curly locks on his forehead, his long long lashes, milky skin. He's overpowering scent, that's makes Louis week in his knees.

It feels like he's losing everything that he ever cared for.

He wants to cry and he wants to run. He wants Harry to forget everything that happened, he wants to forget it himself.

He can't thought, he can't, and that might just kill him soon enough.

He can't say anything of this to Harry, thought. Instead he just ask: "Wanna drive?"

Harry's eyes blink open and he smiles wide, "Thought you won't ask!"

With one last kiss to Louis forehead he takes the offered keys and Louis steps back to let him move. Harry jumps around the car, full of excitement, and Louis is almost sure he hears him squack under his breath.

With one last long look back he sees Zayn still watching them. His eyes too soft and too proud. Louis nods and Zayn noods back. It's gonna be okay, Lou. You'll see.

Louis opens car door and music is already playing from Harry's phone. Omega smiles brightly at him as he starts the car. Louis is just barely settled when Harry's hand appears in his tight, palm up, waiting. He's too weak to refuse him now, or maybe it's his alpha that's getting thought his defences, but so tired and wrapped in Harry's scent he can't refuse him anything right now. He slides his hand into Harry's and closes his eyes.

There are some hard choices in the future waiting for him, some hard conversations. But, for now, only for now, it's what he can do. What he wants.

For now, everything it good.

✨🍃✨🍃✨

[sapphicrot]

r u willing to give us some info abt the streamer au? You’ve mentioned it before but I’m just curious abt it tbh :D

oh I AM MORE THAN WILLING. PREPARE URSELF

so: what happens when you put the physical manifestation of ADHD into an apartment with 3 different flavors of autism, give her a successful twitch career, and blast all of them with Beam Of Insufferably Horny?

the streamer au LMFAO (putting this under a cut bc it got. INSANELY long omfg)

normally i dont rlly like human aus (they’re just not my thing) but this stupid au wormed it’s way into my heart and now i cherish it lmfao. there’s no real set plot, there’s just Situations these lil guys get into. some are soft and adorable (ie. pebbles’ first kiss with sig) or hilarious (sig’s ridiculous amount of flirting with his own chat) or just fuckin stupid (their halloween stream where they do a whole production where chat has to figure out who “killed” sig and it’s just chaos). tbh ive found myself accidentally focusing on the ragequit aspect of the au despite the entire polycule being a thing (lilypad, sunstone, traffic light, ragequit, and hurricane all happen)

i think the Main Things that sum up the au are:

Sig punched Pebbles’ transphobic (now ex) boyfriend in the face and spent a night in jail bc of it LMFAO

Pebbles and Suns meet after Sig drags Pebbles to a party at the college he attends (and Sig attended for a single semester before the whole streamer thing took off). Suns went to catholic school and is incredibly repressed and hesitant with Pebbles and Sig ends up having to instigate a lot of shit to prevent them from just fuckin. never going past hand holding.

Speaking of, Pebbs is an art major and drew all of Sig’s custom emotes. He also loves drawing everyone in the apartment, though usually keeps those drawings hidden from everyone in his sketchbooks

Wind and Sig being childhood best friends who are each others ride or die, they were each others first like, everything. The funniest one being where Wind is having a crisis bc he thinks he might be gay and Sig is just like “hm well I’m kinda a guy maybe kiss me and see if you like it?” And well. Wind has been kissing this fool for 7 years now and does not plan on stopping.

Moon is usually a moderator but does make appearances occasionally and chat loves her. Suns will not go on camera without a face mask. Pebbles was originally camerashy but ends up being in pretty much every stream after a while.

Sig refuses to tell chat his gender and thinks it’s funny watching everyone guess. If you ask/ask for pronouns he just replies with “whatever’s funniest” or “whatever makes this gay”, or if someone’s being rude about it, “whatever pisses you off most”

Sig is like. Insanely good at FPS games and holds multiple top rankings in competitive esports. Yui (Unparalleled Innocence) is one of her main rivals. It’s cute tho. They’re like. rivals who kiss.

Pebbles is Moon’s adopted brother, and has some pretty bad weakness in his hands/legs bc he had cancer as a child. They all support him a lot (Pebbles is rlly stubborn about “being okay”) and Sig does a lot of charity streams for things like forgiving medical debt and cancer research. Sig and Moon bought a huge thing of stickers to help decorate Pebbles’ crutches so he’d like them more.

Pebbles’ name is Pebbles because Moon came up with it as a nickname when they were kids, and when Pebbles came out he chose that as his name. Moon cried about it. Also I just like the whole “transmasc w a silly name” thing bc I feel like it fits him.

Sig helps Pebbles dye his hair (emo mf) but requires that if he helps she gets to put streaks of color in his bangs. It’s usually pink but sometimes she chooses a different color. Sig has the underside of his hair dyed purple. Pebbles’ natural hair color is a pretty light brown.

They all have their cats ofc!! Messenger, Hunter, Arti, and Ruffles!! They were all either strays they found or adopted from a shelter.

That’s all I can think of rn! I wanna draw their designs eventually (and I have but I don’t rlly like them anymore bc OUGHHH I haven’t drawn people in for-goddamn-ever) but yeah!! Damn this got long LMFAO

[marvel-and-dc-geek]

The Labours of Alcides

The Lernaean Hydra

The next task was given to him by the one-eyed boss of the ravens. The gods had been impressed when they saw the cat’s skin, (Tho Shiva got in trouble with his wife Durga, as she was fond of lions)and a bit more by the carving the youth had made of it on his new weapon, so the Nordic chief gave him a harder task: to slay the hydra that was pestering Lerna.

She was the aunt of the lion, being a daughter of Typhon and Equidna.

Mortals would then start to say Hera was her adoptive mother, but how they conclude this is a story we shall save for later .

This creature was even more lethal than the lion: it had six heads instead of just one, and she was huge. Her breath was so deadly, that everything around her would die, which forced the people of Lerna to flee from their homes.

This, even tho it was a tragedy, helped our hero to find her, as Alcides found a caravan of women and children that were running away from the creature. He tried to ask for directions, but the women refused to tell him.

“Don’t even try it, my child. Here you see the widows and orphans from Lerna” an old women tried to warn him “our men gathered together to slay the beast, but not even a single one made it back alive. Not even our king was rival for such a beast “

“That is exactly why we should tell him where it is!” A young, twelve year old boy, who’s mom had died while she was washing clothes due to the creature’s breath, and his dad had gone to slay the creature, wanted someone who could put an end of that thing. He was riding his family’s chariot, which was carried by the the only mule he had been able to save “I shall you myself, mister, if you willing to help us”

“Enough of that, Iolaus. You know that is suicide “ one of the old women tried to argue, but he refused to hear any arguments.

“This is my chariot and I decide what to do with it “ he remained stubborn

“I appreciate your offer, Iolaus, but I would rather not have you come. Just with telling me where I can find the creature is more than enough “ Alcides didn’t want to risk anyone else.

“Oh enough of that, if I die, I shall see my parents again anyways. Hop on, mister ! Penelope is strong enough to carry us both!”he wasn’t going to take no for an answer, and wanted to avenge the rest. The young hero understood that he wouldn’t change the boy’s mind, and hoped into the chariot.

The closer they got, the more horrible the places would get, and they would see less living things. Even the trees and the birds got more scarce, until Alcides saw a couple of familiar creatures

“Huggin, Munin!” He called the crows as he spotted them. Their job was to watch over him, so usually they would leave him alone until he find the place near the creature’s lair (which, in the case he had to track it down, might be a telltale sign.

“What took you so long?” Asked the white raven

“Who is that ?”asked the black raven

“Did the crows just speak?”asked the puzzled boy.

“Ah yes, they serve the gods, and they’re nice “ the explained to his companion.

“Why did you bring a mortal?” Both of them asked

“He guided me “ that wasn’t forbidden, right ? He didn’t want any trouble.

“Bah, I guess there aren’t any rules against this “ pointed out the black one.

“Seeing you both here means we are in the right path “ observed the hero.

“Well of course, but we have no spot to stand on near the hydra’s lair” complained the white raven.

“Except its hideous cave “ complained the black raven.

“You are free to stay in my chariot “ offered the boy “hope on, a couple of ravens are nothing for Penelope “ both crows immediately got in it and the five of them (counting the mule, of course) continued their way until a place where there was absolutely nothing growing in there. As it was swamp, that shouldn’t have even been possible.

As they went on, they saw a weird snake’s head in the floor, but it was bigger than any the hero had ever seen.

“Maybe the poor thing was slayed by the hydra “ thought Alcides, tho that must have been some other monster. And if the beast could slay one of its own, it was certainly fearful.

The boy shook his head “this is a head of the hydra. I only saw it from far away, but nothing could compare to it “ tho there was a detail “ this isn’t the only one she was has, maybe the damn things is still alive with its other five horrible heads “

“They cut it with a sword “ observed the white raven

“It isn’t as resistant as the lion back in Nemea then “observed the black raven.

“You killed the Nemean lion?” Asked an astonished Iolaus.

“Yes, the gods told me to do so “ Alcides answered

“Wow mister, you are very strong!” The surprised boy smiled, tho it quickly faded as he saw something next to the head: he recognized the sword next to it the head, or at least what remained of it’s handle. “Father…” the boy said sadly. He wanted to cry as he picked it up, but refrained himself.

The handle had engraved its late owners name: Ificles, who had managed to cut off one head at the cost of his own life. There was no sight of his body anywhere: it was most likely that he had been a snack for the rest of the creature’s heads.

“His death won’t be in vain “ the hero promised “none of theirs will “ there were several weapons laying in the floor, right where the husbands, sons, uncles, fathers, grandfathers, cousins, nephews and brothers of the women and children of Lerna.

As they reached the top of a hill, they were able to see the cave. It was impossible to miss it, as the creature’s horrible, green-like breath surrounded the whole area. It was right next to a swamp that had once been full of life.

“You stay right here, I don’t want any of you to get hurt” Alcides asked them, he would try to slay the beast as quick as possible. He left his bow and arrows to the kid, along with some other torchers, so he could use them in case he had to defend themselves of any danger (tho, in the opinion of both the crows and even Iolaous himself, it wouldn’t be of much help if the hydra went against them ) and brought his club, along with a torch to lighten the entrance.

Alcides made something very dangerous, that he had only done against the Nemean lion before; he went into the lair of a pissed for creature. He heard a horrible hissing as soon as he lay a step in the cave: a horrible being with seven snake-like head, and a strange dragon-like boy came out quite pissed off: it’s body had some arrows of the last poor idiots who has attempted to slay it.

Alcides didn’t waste any time thinking as he started to hit the heads with his maze and all of his strength, making them fly out while tearing them off. At the end, where there was only one left, the hero stomped it to make sure it was completely dead. One he was done, he turned around to go meet his companions, that place was horrible he preferred not to stay for long.

“Wow, that was quick “ the white raven told the black raven

“Well, the faster we get out of here the better” answered the black one.

But Iolaus, the only human watching (or that’s what he thought at least) wasn’t celebrating: quite the opposite, as his face had turned white “MISTER ALCIDES, LOOK BACK!” Even the calm mule Penelope was aware of the issue, and the ravens turned around to see what was scaring them so much: as they did, there were suddenly two white ravens, as one of them had lost his color out of terror alone.

Alcides turned back as well Now, you human would use the expression that he saw everything in slow motion, which, between us, is the best way to describe how the hero felt he watched as the heads grow back. Except there weren’t seven anymore, now there were fourteen.

See, a detail that all of our heroes has forgotten, is that instead of showing up with five heads, the beast had seven. This is because hydras, as some of you might know, grow back two heads when they lose one. Of course, when a beast so large charges against you, you don’t stop to count its heads, which was exactly what happened to Alcides.

“Oh sh-“ he was barely able to dodge an upcoming attack. The ambrosia at least made him immune to the poison, but he didn’t know if the hydra could slay him in some other way, and it would definitely charge against the quartet that right now could simply serve as witness of the fight.

“Can that thing slay us?” Asked the white raven

“I have no idea” answered the raven that had turned whjte

Cutting heads just made things worse, but unfortunately, he couldn’t go against the body as the hydra defended it fiercely, sacrificing as many of its heads as needed. He had to climb on top of them to get to the body, as he couldn’t simply go around. Alcides had to make sure they wouldn’t bite him, but that was not exactly an easy task. His only option was to slice them off, but even then, it at times became too dark to see, forcing him to grab both his club and the torch. The first one, for some reason, seemed to scare the heads quite a bit.

“Don’t you know to do anything else but cut off their heads?” One of the crows complained.

At some point, the hydra made the worst mistake of her life: one of the heads bit Alcides with such strength that he left his torch fall, just at the exact moment as one of the heads was growing back. As soon as the flame came into contact with the maimed area, it cauterized the wound, which made the heads unable to grow back.

“FIRE, I NEED FIRE !” The hero hadn’t been slow at all, but alas, he didn’t have a way to get fire in that swamp.

Or so he thought: his young companion didn’t know how the gods’ trial worked, and wanted to get revenge against that hideous creature.

“Help me light them up !” Iolaus told the crows

“We cant help, you brat!” Exclaimed the black raven

“You will get us to three in trouble!” complained the white one

“Mister Alcides is the only one who has given it trouble, and I’m not going to let that thing win!”ugh, maybe he should give the hero the arrows by himself.

The crows sighed, but decided to cooperate. They didn’t want to be mocked if a mortal boy was braver than them. The boy put some of the same substance from the torches into the arrows to set them on fire.

Iolaus was about to use the bow, but then he saw something weird coming out of the swamp, it was…

“A crab??!?!” Exclaimed the crows, Alcides, the boy.Even the hydra and the mule seemed to have been taken a back by the appearance of such a thing

The crab, who was later believed to have been send by Hera herself, was simply just angry as, thanks to the other monster, it couldn’t sleep, eat (all his usual preys bad died thanks to the hydra) and it had even stolen his favorite cave. It wanted to get revenge against that thing, and maybe grab something to eat. He charged against the hydra and began to cut some of its heads, make things harder for the hero.

“I will distract that thing, you give the arrows to mister Alcides !” The boy ordered the crows as he lit a torch. Before going, he set his mule free so it could run in case anything happened.

“You aren’t our boss!” But they decided to do it anyways so the brat wouldn’t look braver than them.

As Alcides tried to avoid the crab’s claws and the hydra’s bites, Iolaus held his breath and hit the crab with the torch, who, angrily, began to pursue him away from the hydra: hey, maybe he could eat the daring brat.

“Get out of here !” Alcides shouted to the boy, but he was busy making the crab angry.

“Hey, lad!” The crows called for the hero so he would know they were coming up with the flaming arrows. Alcides took the chance and hit off as many heads as he could before passing them through the fire. As it lost around half its heads, the hydra began to have issues maintaining its balance, making it easier to repeat the same action with the next round of arrows that one of the crows threw. There was only one head left, and Alcides decided to dedicate it to the man who raised the brave boy who had helped him.

“FOR IPHICLES !”he shouted before smashing the head and cauterizing the wound.

The crab stopped as it realized his annoying usurper had suddenly gone quiet: he stopped his persecution to inspect the body.

“If you leave Iolaous alone, it’s all yours “ offered the tired hero. The crab gratefully accepted, a tasty hydra meat meal was worth more than a skinny Greek boy. Plus with so many heads, he could feast for days until more creatures came back to the swamp.

“You made it, mister Alcides!” Iolaous went to congratulate him.

“I wouldn’t have made it without you four “ the hero was honest, and he even gave credit to Penelope, who had carried them and all the weapons all the way there.

“I wonder what mister Odin will say about this…” mumbled the black crow to his partner

“We should started looking for news jobs…” mumbled the white one back.

With the crab’s permission, Alcides took off one of the hydra’s fangs and gave it to Iolaous, who was almost the same size as it. This would be proof that the monster was gone.

“I hope we meet again some day, mister Alcides !” The boy said as he tied Penelope again. Alcides pet the mule and the boy’s hair as well, before going to present himself to the gods.

Iolaous, on the other hand, went back with the women and children of his city, who didn’t think they’d see him alive again. They decided to go back to Lerna, to remake their lives thanks to the bravery of the two youths (and also the crows and the mule). Strangely several visitors seemed to think he was the nephew of Alcides: Iolaous decided not to correct them, seeing they’d bring gifts to his people, which helped them to prosper once again.

Now, there was another human who was in that swamp: a young man who was searching for tales to tell and sing about, who, maybe quite stupidly, thought the hydra would be a good source for horror stories. He was well hidden, and could see the hero’s fight. As he didn’t have the context, he assumed that Alcides and Iolaous were uncle and nephew, which Iphicles being the brother and father to each. He concluded this seeing that the boy didn’t resemble the hero, of course. And he left the crowd aside, as no one would believe his story if he included their role…but of course, he included the crab’s intervention.

[atopvisenyashill]

sidebar- listening to a podcast about this season of survivor w two former players (it was rob cesternino and cassidy clarke, if u watch survivor) and there’s a player on this season, venus, who’s been the outcast for a while, but last few weeks all her opps have walked out one by one and rob goes “i think she’s got kind of an arya stark arc going on” and before he could finish cassidy whispers into her mic “she’s no one” it was hilarious aksjd (he meant as in venus is going through her kill list and might get to the end alive) ANYWAYS-

some changes i’ve noticed

i feel like part of why the series stumbles is bc it doesn’t discuss lyanna as much as it should. having that added “we’ll talk about your mother when i return” scene right before robert & ned’s talk about jon snow’s mother And the targaryens was really good tho, narratively linking the two concepts.

HOWEVER i think like rhaegar & robert, d&d saw lyanna more as a puzzle than a person, but the whole point of lyanna is that she was a living breathing girl to ned and her death completely wrecks him in an irreparable way. so when they cut out his entire milk of the poppy dream sequence later on, it cuts out that she wasn’t just the answer to a riddle of “who was jon snow’s mother” but instead an integral part of the narrative whose absence defines the people ned and jon become. but i’m getting ahead of myself bc they haven’t actually changed anything here yet and the scene where ned and robert stop to talk is really good and more or less what happens in the book aksjdj.

i don't understand why they don't have catelyn thank summer for saving her and bran from the assassin. just another mind boggling decision and weird, unnecessary departure from cat's character

another unnecessary change is taking away ned’s fashionista tendencies smFh they don’t get nedcat at all

the way jaime is like oh ned is gonna be my bestie we’re gonna trade war stories we’re gonna flirt i’ll tell him about his brother’s gruesome death and he’ll be so grateful he’ll become MY best friend instead of robert’s and meanwhile ned is like, openly snarling the whole speech. the way ned’s mouth drops open at the GALL of jaime to say killing aerys felt like justice and jaime looks DEVASTATED and PERPLEXED that this man hates him so much when they’ve talked twice aksjdjd

okay first of all I DO IN FACT GET THE CHANGE of having bran say he had to have fallen whole robb insists he never falls, and we all know this scene lives forever in my mind but i also think it’s a) another weird departure from bran’s canon, very stubborn character and b) a PALE imitation of the talk in the dark between robb & bran where they say they’ll go on an adventure

that said, there’s something that Really fucks me up about the North having this culture wherein the sick and disabled are sent out in the winter to fight and die because they’re not like, worth feeding, but at the same time As A Disabled Person i guess finding it almost enticing to be given to the chance to like Die For A Reason ya know. you always have that out. And then here’s poor sweet Bran who it just never occurred to him that he would have to take that out and now it’s all he wants. anyways i’m crying ig

it’s the stubborn streak in him. he doesn’t want platitudes, he doesn’t want to be strong. his whole life has changed for the worse and he just needs to sit in it. it’s not fair and it all sucks and he’s just a kid!!!

the robert and barristan scene is another good one and it’s bc it plays into robert’s character, really elevates the elephant in the room of rhaenys & aegon, and the way barristan is just. disgusted. standing there consumed with loathing for everything he’s become, refusing to engage with being a driving force for why everything is this way. dragging jaime in to humiliate him in front of barristan, to humiliate barristan in front of jaime. the way barristan almost reaches out to jaime emotionally in a way he refuses to reach out to robert, but robert only gets angry and picks at them more.

“he said the same thing he’d been saying for hours. ‘burn them all.’” OH NOW ITS NOT SO FUN ANYMORE IS IT WISE GUY

gonna be honest i think the weapon talk between jorah and rakharo is one of the sexiest scenes in the show, listening to two dudes who are hit in REALLY different ways talk about their favorite ways of murdering people is really fun and hot to me also elyes gabel and amrita acharia were wasted on this show, they would have killed in later seasons smh

i don’t understand why they made the drogo storyline like a REAL TYPICAL sort of rape romance story. what was the point if they were just gonna be ~in love~ at the end anyway. such a weird choice.

do i love the change from “fear cuts deeper than swords” to “what do we say to the god of death”? like it’s fine. they should have kept both if they liked that line so much. the actor who plays syrio is so good tho he’s got such great chemistry with maisie, you really understand why syrio impacts her so much

that ending close up on ned’s trauma face is so good it’s such a shame they CUT THE DREAM SEQUENCE WHERE WE FINALLY UNDERSTAND WHY NED IS LOSING IT WATXGING ARYA GET FAKE STABBED IN THE GUT. ITS FINE. IM FINE.

general thoughts

“it’ll get easier” jorah is a useless binch just like aemon the dragonknight. what’s the point of your sword if you don’t kill your girl’s evil husband. go fall on it shithead.

i do love that jorah is like “ned is a little bitch for trying to behead me for slavery even tho it’s been illegal in westeros for like hundreds of years. but also maybe having a king that allows behavior like that is kinda crazy actually bc viserys is not right in the head. i’m not gonna reflect on that at all tho” iain glenn the actor that you are.

love the lannister breakfast scene. the way tyrion clearly knows but is pointedly talking around it. jaime thinks tyrion is the height of comedy and wants them to have a nice breakfast but cersei leaves haughtily halfway through even tho tommen & myrcella are having a good time. the Loaded Look jaime gives tyrion during the “life is full of possibilities” line, where he like,,,, Almost realizes Tyrion is saying something to him here emotionally about being disabled before he puts it aside to be self involved about the incest.

kit’s acting is always several degrees of magnitude better when he’s with other starklings. idk if he’s trying harder or if maisie sophie and isaac are so good they infect him with acting abilities.

there’s something fun about the cycles continuing bc joffrey gets drunk & belligerent like his father has a thousand times, but he doesn’t have half the skill or charm as his father and just gets his ass completely handed to him by a practical toddler with zero training. and he’s so embarrassed it helps snowball this situation into a war.

the kid who plays micah is real awkward. i'm not bullying i'm just saying.

“we all pray for prince joffrey’s full recovery” “pity you didn’t spare a prayer for the butcher’s boy” GET HIS ASS

have i mentioned how much i hate aiden’s acting. oh my god i’m not gonna get through this rewatch aksjsj

“war was easier than daughters” ned every emotion you’ve ever felt is harder to deal with than the war that’s why you’re so fucked in the head be so fucking fr with me rn lmao

septa mordane is a terrible guardian i think this can’t be understated

“she must take his side even when he is wrong” “but how could you let her marry someone like that?” GET HIS ASS

bran literally shivering with fear as nan talks my baby!!!!!!!!

“ah the starks. quick tempers. slow minds.” CAN WE SKIP THE EVIL VILLAIN MONOLOGUES TO THE CAMERA PLEASE

“i think we can outfox a ten year old” jaime you couldn’t even kill that ten year old correctly let’s walk before we run

nedcat giggling over ned throttling petyr and then making out in front of petyr’s establishment is amazing i’m literally so depressed right now i hope petyr cried into his pillow that night

the way both ned AND benjen just give the most ass goodbyes to jon for no good reason. are they TRYING to give him a complex oh my god

i think i’m on episode 4. once i get past season one i think it’ll be easier when the writing gets worse actually.

[solitaireships]

💌💗🌺🎀🎠🎡 for whoever you'd like to gush about most!! <3

Thank you! I'm gonna go with James for this

💌 How did you/your F/O confess your feelings to one another?

I'll be honest, I really don't think about this kind of thing with pretty much any of my self ships. I ended up saving this question to answer last, and I still couldn't come up with much. He would have been the one to ask me out tho, and he would have been polite but direct about it, and probably a little bit nervous. He also would have made sure that he asked me out somewhere private too, he wouldn't want to make it a big deal or something where I'd feel like I had to say yes

💗When did your F/O first say ‘I love you?’

This is another type of thing I really don't think about much with my self ships. Knowing James tho, it would have probably been when we were cuddling one night

🌺 How do you and your F/O cuddle?

It really kind of depends! James is a very cuddly person just in general and will pretty much cling to me the second he gets a chance to, so sometimes I have to ward him off when I'm not in a touchy mood. He likes to be big spoon more often than not and will put his arms around me or a hand on my hip while he kisses the back of my neck. But sometimes he's more in a mood to be the little spoon so I'll snuggle up to him and make sure he knows just how much I adore him, and I'll do everything I can to make sure he's safe and happy. I'd say it's probably like 60% of the time he prefers to be big spoon tho

🎀 What’s your favorite thing about your F/O’s appearance?

This is tough bcs I really love everything about James's appearance. But I think I have to go with his prosthetics here. His entire right half from about the collarbone down is made up of prosthetics, and I know it's something that he's pretty self conscious about. He sees his prosthetics and scars as reminders of the mistakes he made and lives he couldn't save, but I see them as a reminder of how much he's been through, and he just keeps going. James have been through still much, and he refuses to give up. And if he can't appreciate his body, then I make sure to do it for him. Because he really is so gorgeous, and I love every part of him

🎠 What’s your favorite thing about your F/O’s personality?

I actually think I might have done this one with James before, but my answer is still thee same as what I remember from before. I love how passionate he is. He tends to be pretty reserved with that most of the time, with his passion mainly coming through in his love of Atlas and his desire to keep his kingdom safe. But it's also very clear in his determination (which can also become stubbornness, but that's also cute from him when he's not being stubborn with me lol)

When we're alone together tho, I get to see another side of James's passion, and that's mainly in terms of just how much he cares about things. He tries to pretend that he doesn't for the sake of his image, but he really does have a lot of thoughts on a lot of stuff. Listening to him talk about criminal justice, or cooking, or woodworking is so fun bcs I can tell he's really enjoying himself. And it's an honor that he trusts me enough to show me just how much of a dork he can be

🎡 What’s your dream date to go on with your F/O?

Honestly just any date would be good, I am really not imaginative with this kind of thing and struggle a lot with self shipping bcs of that. I think it would be really nice to go out to dinner with him tho, somewhere nice and probably a little bit too expensive. Then I'd want to go back home with him so that we can watch a movie together and maybe cuddle if I'm in the mood for it

[jinkicake]

Somebody’s Watching Me

What happens when you ignore him after a fight (#groveling).

Diluc Ragnvindr x Reader

Kaeya Alberich x Reader

Xiao x Reader

A/N: I actually wrote this back in July bc i wanted angst and tension and I meant to post it then but I didn’t have the balls to (still dont but--)... it took me three hours to write less than 3k.... im not who i used to be its so- whateverrrrr,,, as always more of my thoughts are after the tags kekeke, can you tell i still adore angst?

WC - around 2.7K

~~~

Diluc R.

Baby daddy Diluc would love to give you space after a disagreement but, he can’t. He finds himself distracted with everything and anything, nothing can get done when you’re upset with him. Without your forgiveness, he becomes a lost soul! He follows you around like a kicked puppy, he can’t help it! Listen, this man is protective as shit and refuses to be in your bad graces. He’ll do anything to make it up to you, even giving you space if you really want it (although that is the last thing he wants). If you ignore him for too long tho, he might just melt into a puddle of goo and wipe out!

“My love, please-”

“No, Dliuc!” You push away his gloved hand being held out to you, the one that so desperately yearns to cup your cheek, you scoff at it. You scoff at him and Diluc feels his heart aching deep in his chest. “You might not think much of it but, I do. Leave me alone.” 

The words harshly slap against him, leaving the man speechless as he pathetically opens and closes his mouth to say anything to get you back. His feet feel as if they’re made out of stone and he knows that no weight could ever keep him from running to you but, now, with the hurt on your face; he feels too ashamed to do anything but watch you storm out of the Winery. 

He didn’t know that a snide comment about his brother would snowball into this, you and your unmoving anger. 

You’re just so stubborn, so beautiful, that it makes him want to tug at his fiery roots until he yanks his hair out. Diluc knows he said the wrong thing, that maybe talking so lowly of someone you consider a dear friend wasn’t the right thing to do but, he simply could not help it. 

Because Diluc watches whenever you step into his field of vision, makes sure to keep you within a safe distance beside him so then he feels comfortable enough to carry on with whatever he was doing. 

The same thing happened earlier in the night, everything was fine after his usual scan of the room, but then he heard your laugh. Your charming laugh, one that he thought was reserved for him was instead being spoiled by his brother. It’s a miracle the glass he was drying in his hand didn’t shatter at that moment. Diluc is more than aware of your close friendship with Kaeya, he knows of all the commissions the two of you share and he hates it. Your relationship irks him in a way that he can’t comprehend and he’s aware that he needs to fix that. Fix his jealousy. However, it’s clearly taking much longer than he thought. 

Instead of worrying, Diluc focuses on organizing the newly cleaned glasses he left after dinner. One by one, he sets them up perfectly on the shelf before carefully placing each napkin in its rightful stack. It’s become his ritual of cleaning the Winery each night. But, now he’s just distracting himself from the inevitable feeling that has already begun to set in. A mix of worry and guilt, inevitably overpowered by rejection. 

His strong fingers thump against the clean dining table and for a moment, Diluc distracts himself from the one thing he wants most. You. It’s a distraction short-lived because he cracks a single finger before making his way deep into the office. Perhaps his paperwork will give him a large enough headache to distract him once more. 

The numbing pain building in his temple is nothing compared to the hollow ache blooming in his chest. The mundane task works, the countless amount of numbers he checks over and over again do their job until he hears the gentle sound of the door opening. For a moment, he thinks he may have imagined it but then he hears your footsteps and Diluc is out of his chair and pushing the door out of his way to meet you. 

Even if you glance at him and ignore him, walking further up the stairs to create more distance, Diluc already feels the ache starting to soothe over. He follows you after you, keeping a safe amount of paces behind you. Quietly, he moves as if you won’t be able to notice his six-foot frame doing so. 

“Beloved,” He starts and you greet him with the bedroom door closing in his face. The action causes a small smile to appear on his face, but Diluc quickly shakes it away. “please,” 

It’s nearing midnight and neither of you has time for this. The last thing Diluc wants is you going to sleep upset with him. 

He sighs softly before following you into the bathroom, the man feels ashamed and it burns brightly in his chest, 

“I’m sorry,” He murmurs against your neck, slowly breathing in the alluring scent entangled with your hair. “please forgive me.” In his own selfish way, a side he can only show towards you, he doesn’t really give you a choice. Diluc’s strong, muscular arms are wrapped around your waist and holding onto you so tightly. You couldn’t get away from him now without a fight. “I’m working on… my jealousy. Darling, please.” 

Even you have to admit how hard it is to deny Diluc when he is begging so earnestly. 

You lightly place your hand on top of his own, squeezing him gently before glancing back to place a gentle kiss on his jaw. He sighs with relief. 

“I won’t forgive you so easily next time.”

“I know. I will hold you to it.”

Kaeya A.

Kaeya, my forever #1 in this game, would need space after a heavy disagreement. If you walk one way then he will walk in the other direction until he cools off. However, it usually takes him about ten meters before he realizes that he should escort you wherever you’re going so he just follows while silently stewing in his own anger. Kaeya doesn’t show it, he never does because he doesn’t want to displease you but, his upset feelings are there. But, he loves you and would kiss the ground that you walk on to prove it to you. 

“Fine then.”

“Fine!” You shriek, and how it got to this, Kaeya isn’t really sure. He watches as you turn away and walk towards the entrance of Mondstadt, his stare lingers for a few moments before he heads towards the cathedral. The two of you always know how to make a scene, even when no one is around and it is late into the evening and all the shops around have closed. He finds that to be a good thing, he didn’t want an audience tonight. Not like this anyway. 

His blood is still rushing through his veins, he can hear his heart thumping in his ears. He can still recall the fire burning in your eyes and the distinct way that your hands trembled by your sides every time either of your voices got louder. The captain feels guilty above anything else, anger is still there but he knows it’s an emotion that will fade away quickly. 

“Damn it, (Y/N),” Kaeya sighs before tilting his head back, giving himself the view of the starry sky. You always did love the night sky. He knows what he said was wrong, that maybe he shouldn’t have insinuated that you needed support on such a lowly ranked mission but, he couldn’t help it. Kaeya does not like to take chances with you and he would rather underestimate you than overestimate, even if that makes you burn brighter in fury than his brother’s hair. 

He just didn’t expect you to get so angry, he thought that maybe you would understand and take it down a notch. Kaeya can’t stand to see you get hurt, to find you fighting multiple monsters all by yourself at once. There’s nothing in this world that could save him if something happened to you, why don’t you get that?

Any unresolved anger gets put on the back burner of his mind, Kaeya decides to make it his priority to look for you. He’ll be damned if you don’t want to be found. 

“Stubborn ass,” He murmurs as he heads out the gates, there are a number of places that you could be. Kaeya finds himself so focused, consumed with this one thing he wants so badly, that he doesn’t even blink as he passes the darknight hero. 

The redhead beside him lets out a noise that is somewhere between a scoff and a laugh. 

“(Y/N),” Kaeya calls when he sees you on the other side of the bridge outside the walls of Mondstadt, feet hanging off of the side while you stare at the ducks in the lake below. He sounds playful and that instantly causes your face to sour. Your lips purse at his voice, eyebrows furrowing together, you merely blink at Kaeya before turning your attention back to the water. “don’t ignore me, sweetest.” 

In a way, Kaeya is still trying to level his own anger. He’s still processing the effects of your previous conflict while balancing your current conversation. It takes him a moment or two to find the right footing. 

“What’s got you bothered, babe?” He sits down beside you very close to the point that there are mere centimeters that keep your thighs from touching. You look at him with a blank expression but Kaeya can see the irritation embedded in your features. “Oh?” He sounds amused when you ignore him once more but, that could be further from the truth. Kaeya is neither entertained nor delighted by this, no, he’s pissed. “Come on, talk to me,” He urges again and this time, he wraps his arm around your shoulders to pull you into his chest. “you wound me, (Y/N).” 

“You wound me!” You finally snap at him, eyes filled with a rage that clearly hasn’t left you from before. “You think I’m weak!” 

“I do not, my darling. I just think you need some extra help whenever I can’t join you.” Kaeya’s words do little to soothe your anger, in fact, you just become more irritated. You attempt to push yourself up, to stand up and walk away from him but the captain pulls you tightly into his chest. “You’re not running away from me again~” Had you not been so upset you would have caved in at his honeyed words, taking a rest in his strong arms. “I just want you to stay safe, you get that, don’t you?”

Some part of you can understand that. 

“I’m sorry if I had upset you, sweetest, but I want to make sure nothing happens to you.” Almost as if he is trying to emphasize his words, Kaeya’s arms squeeze around you tightly. “Please let me protect you,”

“I can protect you too, okay?” You stubbornly stare at him and the challenge that rests within your eyes makes his heart flutter. “and myself.”

“Do you promise me?” Kaeya dips his head down, brushing his lips over yours. 

“I promise.”

And he seals that with a kiss. 

Xiao

If, for some reason, you end up in a disagreement with Xiao and you tell him to politely ‘fuck off’; he will respect your wishes. Xiao will respect it and you by keeping a safe distance of 50 meters between the two of you. Sorry to say this (teehee not really) but the adeptus will not let you out of his sight. He makes it his duty to protect you so when he ends up being the one that hurts you, he works tenfold to make up for it. Quietly, he will follow until you’re ready to come back and talk with him once more. 

“Leave me alone, Xiao.” You didn’t have to even look over your shoulder to tell he was there. Still, you frown when you see your boyfriend behind you perched on the top of a large rock. Irritation blooms in your chest and you hastily try to swallow it down by taking a few more steps down the dirt path. 

“Okay.” His voice is soft, almost as it if he speaks it like a promise. You sigh out in relief, feeling a weight lifting off of your shoulders because sometimes you just need space. But then he appears on another boulder in front of you, teleporting, and it almost feels as if he is mocking you. 

Xiao watches you carefully, he doesn’t let his amber eyes leave your sight for even a second as you continue to aimlessly walk through the Bishui plain. Had you not known him so well, you would have thought he was angry. His face is hard as his hollow eyes stare and stare to make sure you feel his presence all around you. 

This is a normal Xiao. Protective and kind, always worrying about you almost more than needed. No amount of arguing or convincing could get him to see that you’re fine without him hovering around you every second of every day. The mere thought makes you wince and ache blooms in your chest at the harsh words spat between the two of you earlier in the evening. 

You shouldn’t have called him obsessive and paranoid. 

He shouldn’t have called you weak and helpless. 

Carefully, you glance over your shoulder to look at him. Xiao looks lonely on the rock, he feels distant as his eyes wash over you. Almost to ask what’s wrong, he subtly tilts his head. 

You’re not ready to give in, not yet. You keep walking, ignoring the gentle breeze of air transporting around you until you reach a familiar rock. 

The earthly object is not hard to climb, it sits low enough that you can place yourself on it without any work. It provides such a pretty view of the plains, and the gentle green and yellow accents never fail to provide you with comfort and a sense of stability. 

Xiao lets you have your breath of air, he watches as you stare longingly at the scene in front of you. He doesn’t glance at it once, he’s meant to protect Liyue and will do so with his entire being when it comes down to it but-

But, something claws in his chest and urges him to protect you even more.

If you want space, he will give it to you. However, he will always see to it personally that you get home safely. His mortal treasure is more precious to him than duties. 

He can only stand you angry at him for so long. 

Xiao’s footsteps are silent, he moves so quietly that you don’t hear him but you always feel him when he is near. You know that he is now standing beside you, just a little behind so that he doesn’t impose on your view. 

“Are you ready to forgive me?” Xiao, as much as he doesn’t know about mortal emotions, knows how this needs to go. He asks for forgiveness, you grant it to him then you’re not angry with him anymore. He sees the scene play out time and time again between couples at the Wangshuu inn, but he would never admit that he pays attention to them.

“Have you even apologized yet?” You glance back at him, brief judgment in your eyes but any of your fighting spirit had diminished hours ago. 

“Oh,” Xiao quietly gasps, hiding the noise as he gently sits down next to you, he forgot about that part, didn’t he? “I apologize.”

“I’m sorry.” 

You both blurt it out at the same time and a heavy air descends upon the two of you. Xiao shakes his head before tilting it away from you as he lets his eyes glance over rock to rock. 

“You’re not weak.” His soft tone almost makes you melt and the quiet murmur makes your cheeks burst with heat. “I don’t want anything to ever happen to you. If you call for me, I will always be there.” 

You smile, you smile at him and he feels the stiff heart in his chest thump. 

“I know, Xiao.” His eyes widen as you rest your hand over his own, how can you be so kind and understanding? “I shouldn’t have called you those things, I didn’t mean it, I was just angry and took it out on you.” Xiao almost finds it hard to focus, your touch is so soft and your lips are so full underneath the moonlight. Oh, how can’t he kiss you at this moment? “I like my space but, only if you’re there to share it with me.”

[mysicklove-main]

𝐃𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐊 𝐇𝐂𝐬

With: Izuku Midoriya, Katsuki Bakugou, Shoto Todoroki, Eijiro Kirishima, Denki Kaminari, Mina Ashido, and Ochako Uraraka

A/N: Different types of drunks are so funny to me. I love watching some ppls personalities just doing a 180, its always so amusing to me. I also might write one for demon slayer characters, I was on the fence about mha or kny. lmk if i should do it for my other loves :)

𝐈𝐙𝐔𝐊𝐔 𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐘𝐀

Light Weight/Sloppy Drunk

Light. Weight. I mean everyone know it, after one drink his cheeks are flushed and he is grinning like a mad man.

His former classmates love to just offer him drink after drink, just to see him get wasted.

Sloppy drunk. Im sorry, but he is. Slurring his words, hiccuping, stumbling everywhere. 

He always ends up falling somehow, you find him laughing on the floor with people crowding over him trying to help him up.

Talks to everyone he can find. Literally they cant even understand what he is saying because he is slurring his words and rambling about everything.

”Im not drunk, Y/N! You're drunk!” As he is on the floor, refusing to grab onto your hands to help him up. He's so stubborn.

He always ends up vomiting. 

You basically have to pour water down his throat to sober him up.

He refuses to go out the next couple of days cause he is so embarrassed of his actions.

𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈 𝐁𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐆𝐎𝐔

Silent/Clingy Drunk

His usual scowl disappears, and for once in his life he looks…relaxed?

Just watches his friends do stupid things without any yelling.

Seems to scout for you the second you leave his sight.

Lots of mumbling under his breathe that nobody hears.

Sticks with you most of the time. Only talking when someone talks to him, but even so he gives one word responses.

You only know that he is drunk because of his flushed appearance and slight smile. Its so rare to see him smile in front of people.

Mumbles compliments in your ear, and plays with the hems of your outfit.

Holds your hand the entire night and follows you around.

Randomly will disappear and come back with another round of drinks for the table. Instantly becomes everyones favorite drunk.

Yells at everyone the next day if the mention anything about him being “soft”

𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐈

Relaxed/Smiling Drunk

Its rare to see Shoto give a full smile, but after a couple of shots he just can't stop grinning.

Is surprisingly much more talkative and friendly towards his ex-classmates.

But the second he finds somewhere to sit, he is stationed there for the rest of the night.

He acts more high than drunk istg

Just sits back and smiles, laughing at everything that comes out his friends mouth.

Its so cute though, because he gets so excited when talking to you.

He def slurs his words but you cant even tease him because he looks like he is having the time of his life.

One of those drunks that finds out they have a random special talent. Like have u seen that video of the drunk dude that finds out he is fantastic at piano?? Thats shoto.

Laughs at his self when he tries to walk in a straight line. “Look Y/N. I cant walk straight!” You just have to go along with it

Doesn't get hungover at all! But also doesn't remember anything lol

𝐄𝐈𝐉𝐈𝐑𝐎 𝐊𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐀

Crying/Emotional Drunk

Something about it just gets him so emotional. He doesn't even know why.

He drinks and cries, drinks and cries, until you have to drag him home.

Most of the time he is crying about like the least important things like how good you look right now or how crazy it is that he is dating someone like you.

Other times he tries to go all “meaning of life” on everyone. It throws everyone the fuck off and you always have to try to get him back into the moment. Its so funny tho 

When he bumps into someone, he apologizes so much it makes the other person feels uncomfortable.

Will randomly go silent and then start crying again. The bartender always looks so concerned. 

You have to bring him home early bc he just ruins the vibe. he is not allowed to drink when you guys are tying to relax and enjoy the moment.

Sober him is way more fun lmaooo

𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐊𝐈 𝐊𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐑𝐈

Flirty/Touchy Feely Drunk

Are you surprised? 

Its like every single pickup line is blurted out no matter the moment.

You'll be in the middle of a conversation and all of the sudden you hear some bullshit like. “Hey baby, are you from Tennessee?” “Denki dont.” “Cause youre the only ten I see” scares off every single girl you were talking to.

Tries to get you to do lewd ass dancing with him and acts like you killed him when you decline.

Hand on your waist, or thigh, or neck, or ass if you dont slap him away. Genuine pervert.

You catch him flirting with Bakugou once and you got so much second hand embarrassment from the way the blonde just stared at him in disgust.

Tries to unbutton his shirt, and about every ten minutes you have to rebutton it for him. “What, you cant handle all of this?” You almost kill him.

Overall, at least he is a partier and you know youll have fun with him.

Gets HORRIBLE hangovers tho. You are stuck taking care of him the next day (again)

𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀 𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐃𝐎

Affectionate/Friendly Drunk

Makes friends with every single person she sees.

The drunk girls you see in the bathroom that hypes you up? Thats her.

Especially if you are her partner?? God damn she compliments you so much.

Ends up helping the DJ chose songs when you guys go to clubs. Seriously it is so funny how she ends up talking to everyone.

So much dancing. So so much dancing. Even if its just the two of you, you guys are dancing.

But also mom too, like makes sure everyone has water and isnt getting too fucked up (izuku). Keeps everyone a their best.

You stumble over, she catches you with the biggest smile on her face. Wont even tease you, just continues to make the vibes just absolutely great.

Holds her alcohol perfectly. Enough to get crazy, but she isnt stumbling nor slurring her words.

I just want to go clubbing with her.

𝐎𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐊𝐎 𝐔𝐑𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐊𝐀

Angry/Fight Picker Drunk

This seems like a shocker. What precious ochako getting mad at people???

Yes. She picks fights.

ALWAYS with dudes that her twice her size too. Be prepared to fight istg.

Yells at people who are too drunk (Izuku) and tells them to get their shit togehter. You have to use your hand to cover her mouth before she gets kicked out.

So many curse words. So many.

Literally gets approached by nobody because she has the biggest frown on her face. 

You have to try to ease her up by dancing with her or showering her with compliments.

Cheers her up for a bit, and she goes back to all smiley and happy, but then someone interrupts the two of you, and she goes back to being pissed.

You have to watch her 24/7.

She doesnt drink that much anymore because she knows how she gets lol

[goddang-ken]

| Self indulgent nsfw Ennead headcannons|

**Hello, I have a translated ennead headcannons and Q&A’s from the extras book if you want to check it out**

Words: almost 2k

Warnings: | Mentions of breeding and frottage | there no gender terms so everything’s up to you| could be incest if you want it to |adfshsh can you tell I’m on my period?😭 | I wrote this with my pussy and not my mind

-Has more length than girth, not necessary a cervix destroyer but if you’re in the right position he can give it little kisses, a little bit longer than the average size with subtle veins, curves a little upwards, the head is his most sensitive spot, if your going down on him pay close attention to his slit and don’t forget to tease his glans!!! And when he cums tug on balls a little

-he’s more of a grower than a show-er

-if you really want him to have a powerful orgasm you can massage his prostate through the perineum or if you’re willing to wake the sleeping bear you can slip a finger inside him and watch him truly come undone, I’m taking about knees pulled to his chest,full body quakes, fists turned white from how hard he’s gripping you and the bed covering/blanket is ripped because his claws came out and the most embarrassing noises being pulled from deep within his godly being 

-be careful of doing that tho cuz once he recovers he’s kicking you out for embarrassing him like that, might even attack you

-Pretty tame when it comes to pubic hair, well groomed, a little shade lighter than the red on his head

-cums is a little on the watery side but it flys pretty far when he cums afsdsfh , might even cut his moans short cuz he has to turn his head to keep it from going into his mouth

-A bratty power bottom you just gotta work for it cuz he’s stubborn and cocky and refuses to be topped, most of y’all’s foreplay is fight which probably leads to y’all fucking in shredded clothes in the rubble of what was once a temple

-as stated before his claws come out when he gets lost in the pleasure

-He’s a biter, when he cums he’s gonna latch into the closest piece of skin and try to muffle his moans and if he can’t latch all you can hear is is loud desperate moans echoing out through the halls and drool escaping from the side of his mouth, he also unknowingly keeps all eye contact with you when he cums, if you move your head left he’s moving his head left too

-his wide red eyes brimming with tears and smudged makeup after he cums showcasing all his love for you on his sleeve and insecurity he’s desperately tried hiding from you only to lay it all out in that very moment .You’re luck cuz hardly anyone gets to see him this weak so treasure it, don’t say anything yet just let him bask in the aftershocks of his mind numbing orgasm and hold him tight

-If your in missionary and his mind is far gone from the orgasm he’s experiencing you can hear him chanting “I love you” through gritted teeth near your ear

-doesn’t particularly have sensitive nipples so if you try to play/suck on them he might shoo you away from that area

-his ears and neck are his weak area!!!

-he also keeps mini thrusting when he cums, with little fully body twitch here and there

-doesn’t like to take his dick out right after y’all are done, let him stay connected to you for a bit

-is a big softy on the inside, we all know he’s scared of being forgotten so murmur sweet nothings and praise into his ear during sex

-if you’re having sex leaning on the rougher side every once in a while ask him if everything is okay and if he wants to stop (cuz we all know about his ptsd)

-acts of service and domestic life turn him on, you could be literally sweeping the floor and he’s like “damn I wanna fuck you”, he doesn’t voice it tho, just sits there with his legs tightly crossed

-I don’t think he likes body hair(as he said before it’s something savages have), so another way to bond or give an act of service boner is…shaving (hear me out), the act of holding a knife near one’s genitalia is a huge act if trust, not to mention the tension that’s in the air and the obvious touching and soft groping to his privates to make sure he’s clean shaven is bound to make him hard

-another act of service boner is redoing his make up (cuz all he does his trace over it again each day) or brushing his long  luscious hair or even making him a new weapon to use

-he’s probably into mutual masturbation but he tends to cum a bit early from embarrassment cuz you’re watching him 

-GIVE HIM AFTERCARE GODDAMIT, clean him up if he’s messy, run your fingers through his hair, rub his back etc, anything will do please

-is super clingy when your done, mostly follows you around everywhere cuz he’s still in that vulnerable mindset, don’t say anything about it or he’ll get defensive and angry and he’ll hold a grudge for while

-apologize to him by using skinship, like back hugging him and kissing his neck (his most sensitive spot) and shoulders while he’s being all pissy and he might let you join his bed

-also likes to be taken in multiple positions and in different locations

-frottage is like his number 1 kink, it’s the desperation for each other that drives him crazy , doesn’t matter if it’s through clothes or skin to skin he likes it all

-sex in front of his temple with the desert in view is also one of his favorite place’s to have intercourse

-Doggy style or cowgirl is his favorite positions too

-it doesn’t matter what positions y’all fuck in but when it’s time to cum he wants to be on his back

-even tho hes sterile, let him say he’s going to get you pregnant/beg him to get you pregnant or tell him to cum inside and he’ll go crazy, downside is he’ll be upset and quiet when you’re finished and might cry afterwards so be careful when saying that demand.

-thick just like his daddy, nice rounded head head, perfectly plump balls, if you grab massage them while he’s thrusting he’ll hitch his breath, he’s unfamiliar with the feeling but doesn’t tell you to stop 

-I feel like he’s both a grower and a shower, there’s just a little change to his dick when he’s hard

-kinda wild in the pubic hair area, never really felt the need to do anything with it, might get a little self conscious and trim it a little when you’re not around, and when you do come back he drops his shendyt unproved and ask if you like it

-short powerful thrusts,rhythm is a little off since he’s new to this, may ask here and there if he’s doing okay,

-we all saw Seth grab his boobie adfagsh his breast were breasting boobly, doesn’t really feel that much stimulation in his nipples but will let you pinch,grope and suck on them if you want

-doesn’t really have any kinks, sex wasn’t on his mind growing up so he’s completely brainless when it comes to pleasures of the flesh but is willing to try anything with you to find out what might interest him

-let him practice!!! Introduce mutual masturbation first before taking on anything else, let him touch you or let him watch as you pleasure yourself so he knows what to do when y’all actually have sex

-v much into cock milking and ruined orgasms, yes ma’am, nothing gets his blood hot than being coated with his cum and getting his life essence pulled from his dick till he’s thrashing and shooting out blanks

-And after watching he might gain the courage to ask if he can practice his thrusts, he won’t actually be inside you tho, he’ll have his dick placed in-between your lower abdomen (getting on irl view of what would be if he was inside you) and his hand and he’ll go on from there

-if he’s not practicing on your abdomen then he’s going to practice on your thighs when you’re laying together in bed

- He a hugger, likes to be chest to chest and puts his body weight on you

-Hold his hand!!! Interlock your fingers together and he’ll kiss them

-or while you’re holding hands he’ll slip one or two of your fingers into his mouth and suckle,

-also if you’re not paying attention to him he’ll grab your hand and suck on your fingers slowly getting each one wet while maintaining eye contact (he knows what he wants but doesn’t know how to voice it poor bby)

-hug him back and tell him that you love him, him that he will forever and always be your number one, you’re Sun and moon and that you’re never letting him go + some hair tugging and he’ll cum on the spot

-cum is thick like glue, cums a lot too, doesn’t really shoot far just kinds slides down his shaft and drips down off his balls

-Ngl he’d probably be into eating his cum outta you, or at least watching it ooze out

-cuckhold fetish too (sometimes), likes to be the one to fuck the other persons cum out, there’s something about seeing your hole be filled to the brim that drives his insane

-vocal based off of the extra comic, deep moans that from his gut that turn into light airy “ha’s” very expressive too, tosses his head back most of the times when he cums, mouth is usually kept open in a silent scream, keeps gulping air, still breathes hard after you’re done, keeps his hips in place and pressed fully against you, if you try to move he’ll have a fully body twitch and whisper a little breathy “wait” and pressed your hips back down on the bed

-even after he cums he’ll pull his hips back a little to let his dick slide out but he’s not getting off you just yet

-clingy when you’re done ,he cages you in his arms and refuses to let go,nuzzles you head every once in a while and hums, breathing in the scent of you

-never actually tells you that he wants to have sex he just hopes that you notice his desperation, will literally stand there with a erection till you wake up and smell the pheromones and if you don’t or it’s taking too long he’ll press himself against you and hope that you take a hint

-pubic hair doesn’t really bother him, mostly ask you how you want him to have it

-we all know he has the cervix suplexer, cervix scraper gynecologist hate him. IUD’s want to be him,soda can horse cock

-is a shower all the way, there isn’t much difference from him being flaccid or hard either way it’s hanging down to his knees, takes hella pride in it

- “go on. You can touch it, it’s yours ” afagshdj it’s hot to the touch and you can feel his heartbeat through it

-big balls too *hides face*, he may not show it but fondling or sucking on a nut makes him weak in the knees

-thick with  prominent veins, angry!angry!dark green colored head,curves a little to the side with a pretty bulbous head, the hardest part probably is getting the head to fit, very leaky with the precum

-obsessive and possessive is his middle name

-a service dom, could even dry cum from watching you cry the waves pleasure he’s inflicting

- Definitely has a huge crying/begging kink

-you’re giving him a blowjob? Oop He’s pinching your nose shut and throat fucking you for the hell of it, the pain of your nails scratching his thighs excites him more than he expected

-Refuses to stop till you’re shaking and covered in cum and sweat and on the verge of passing out but that doesn’t stop him

-grunts more than he moans, likes to hear you more than himself

-breeding kink ,breeding kink,breeding kink

-corruption kink while we’re at it too, loves to make you question your faith with the whole “if it’s bad why does it feel good?”

-will probably hold your body up with his vines and fuck you in the air, just carries you around and uses you like a human fleshlight

-or…if he’s feeling a little annoyed with you, he holding you in the air with his vines and has them fuck you instead

-imma say it…when it comes to self pleasure he has a sounding fetish

-He can and will guilt trip you into sex at anytime and anyplace

-won’t let you leave till you’re overflowing with his seed and you can’t walk straight

-talkative, mostly praises or talks about what he’s going to do to your body or how well you’re taking him

-makes you repeat the dirty things he’s whispering into your ear out loud cuz he knows your embarrassed

-doesn’t necessarily like you being on top but he’ll allow it if he’s in a mood to watch you struggle

-if you’re on top and taking too long to move he’ll slap your thigh to get you moving or he’ll give a little thrust to jostle you around a bit

-his cum is also on the semi watery side but he cums a lot so it’s okay, I also don’t think it shoots far? Kinda just flows down his dick and coats his balls

-if you trying to squirm away cuz you’re too sensitive hes just gonna drag you back to him or he’ll follow your body while still connected to you

-it may seem like he’s asking you for permission to cum inside but that’s a lie,he’s actually telling you that he’s gonna cum inside whether you like it or not, actually riles him up and makes his blood hot when you beg him not to

-responds to all your squeals and moans with a hum or “yea?”

-uses you as a fleshlight when he’s feeling jealous as a punishment

-that one headlock position is a position he likes to use if you keep moving away from him, mating press is also one of his favorites

-he may or may not leave his dick inside after he cums, depends on his mood

-exhibitionist, lives off the thrill of almost getting caught, teases you if you start getting all panicky which makes him slow down and draw out his thrusts

-he’s a hit it and leave kind of guy mostly because he doesn’t want isis to find out, but if you beg him a lil he might stay for a few minutes

[xamaxenta]

the note I added to a plot document for arc 6, featuring feral bastard sabo who cannot articulate his feels and slightly suicidal marco:

Interlude chapter during the period where they’re figuring shit out: Sabo, extremely pissed at Marco about Marco’s self-sacrificial and self-martyring shit, makes a comment about how “normally when I have a problem as stubborn as you, I’m able to just beat it’s face in until it stops moving but I don’t even get that satisfaction with you!” “You could if you weren’t a coward.” which results in a fight where an enraged Sabo bashes Marco’s skull in with a pipe. Stunned and terrified of himself, Sabo watches Marco’s head burst into flames before he gets up and “feel better now?” “No, you fucking asshole, I feel worse actually!” and they end up hugging it out. Ace, watching from the window, just shakes his head. Followed up by all three cuddling sabo in the middle in bed and Marco apologizing for making Sabo do that, and sabo trying to express that marco didn’t make him do shit. It goes nowhere until ace tells them to just shut up they’ll sort it out in the morning. Might result in a second fight where sabo shoots marco through the eye (because I love the look of marco’s flaming eye) (instead of blood and viscera, it’s just flames and feathers, marco’s awakened fruit refusing to submit to death, marco staggered back briefly by the impact then leaning forward again with his burning eye and the back of his head erupting in flames and feathers. Marco blinks away the fire). Sabo breaks down, sobbing about Marco being too forgiving, how he shouldn’t tolerate this kind of treatment from someone he loves, etc. Marco hugs him through it and tells sabo it’s okay and to talk to ace. Later, ace explains that sabo loving marco too doesn’t diminish what they have together (and, in fact, probably just expands it because why wouldn’t they share everything anyway? Marco’s down for it, even if they have to beat some sense into him first about giving up his place for sabo instead of just letting sabo in the same way he’s let ace in)

This makes me WUWUEUE so hard like youre right this deranged feral sabo is thee best and i really cant wait to see how you will write him bc this is super emotional and everyone’s realllyyy keyed up

I loooove how Sabo would react like hair trigger almost and instantly regret what he’s done, feel sick to his stomach as Marco revives, easily imagining him with a sickly complexion and a pinched expression like why would you fucking say shit like that

And Sabo gets to be in the middle!!! To feel Ace and Marco like , talk about the most complicated emotional sandwich, i enjoy the concept of Marco and sabo facing each other and bickering in circles and Ace headbutts Sabo from behind like fucks sake shut the fuck up both of you please and they do bc Ace needs rest 🥹

Sabo for that second fight essentially unwillingly? Using marco as an emotional punching bag is SO GOURMET as is the always fantastic flaming eye aesthetic Marco often gets depicted with its sexy even tho the content and reason for this flaming eye isnt so sexy hah

And that last bit where where

Giving up his space place by Aces side so Sabo can take it is legit thee delicacy that is MAS its not about Marco letting Sabo take his place its about letting him in its not about favourites or replacements or replacing people Ace cares about or people Sabo or Marco care about its about opening up the love they share aaaa AA

[wizkiddx]

your voice

angsty vibe, requested by @hollandlover19 than you for th rq and hop this doesn't disappoint too much :)))

summary: tom says something so stupid and has to deal with the consquences

warnings: a bit angsty, but ends in fluff! argumnts and raising voices, I guess could be associated with panic attacks tho not written with that intention

//////////////////////////////////

“Oh, Y/n er sorry.” Harrisons morning dulcet tones were what you were awoken to with a groan.

Everything was achy, and your head was pounding, making you grumble in discontent as you shifted uncomfortably on the technically too-small-to-sleep-on sofa.

This was not the morning you’d foreseen even 12 hours ago.

Lockdown had been difficult for everyone, even removing the tragic health crisis. Being locked in with your boyfriend and his brothers and friends was, for the most part, amazing. Lots of laughs, lots of beers and lots of quality time that you usually didn’t get. But it was also intense.

Without a doubt, since you first got together, this was the longest time you’d ever had with Tom. And it had been brilliant, your relationship getting so much closer and just learning the subtlest intricacies about the other. In fact, when lockdown had been announced, you’d never lived together (the most a week-long holiday).

Though it was also like a pressure cooker, Toms rented house. When one of you were in an understandable but stubborn lousy mood, it affected the whole house.

Yesterday night had been the perfect storm. The weather was unbelievably scorching; your work had announced that they had to let some staff go because of the financial implications of the pandemic; a ‘mole’ had released personal details of your relationship.

And it was like a pot on the stove; everything went from controllable to violently boiling over in a matter of minutes.

Honestly, you didn’t even know why you had started arguing - it was that pathetic. And yet you’d both said pretty horrible stuff - though it was Tom who had crossed the line. Frankly, the way he’d spoken to you was almost unforgivable.

You’d both known instantly too, all his anger at you had immediately evaporated when he’d realised what he had said. It took no time for him to become a grovelling apologetic mess, however even that- it was already too late.

It might sound feeble, but honestly, you’d run and locked yourself in the downstairs loo. You’d cried on the inside- whilst from the other side of the door, he had been begging and pleading with you.

After an hour though, Tom finally gave up - hence why you’d had a pretty uncomfortable night on the sofa.

This brings it back to Harrison, the early riser of the house, barrelling into the living room after his morning run. All bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, except also slightly terrified looking as he stood awkwardly in the doorway.

“I’m up now” You sighed, dragging yourself into a sitting position on the sofa whilst massaging your crooked neck.

“You er…. you fell asleep watching the TV?” Rolling your eyes, you sighed at the blonde, even if his poor acting was a little entertaining.

“Are we both pretending that you don’t know what went down last night?” Of course, Harrison knew. The walls were thin, you’d been screaming and he was Tom’s best friend. No doubt, Tom had immediately gone to him for help and advice last night.

Harrison held his hands up in response, caught in the act, and clicked his tongue. “What he said was bad. You shouldn’t be the one ending up with the sore back.” He wasn’t wrong.

“And yet here I am…” With a sigh you smiled which he returned with a sickeningly empathetic one “Anyway, don’t let my sad self get in the way, did you come in here for anything?”

Now, because Harrison was mentally a five year old, that’s how you ended up sat crossed-legged on the floor, clutching a wii remote and angrily shouting at yoshi on the mariokart screen. The whole household was competitive as hell and you were no exception - so some rouge elbows were flying when he viciously knocked you off the track.

Slowly Harry and Tuwaine filtered in and picked up remotes too, so the quiet morning was very quickly switched into a tense atmosphere of yelps and shouts. None more so than Tuwaine, who was possibly the worst looser you had ever met.

Really, you knew all the boys were only doing this as there way of showing you they were with you. That they also thought Tom was a massive raging dickhead. And you appreciated it more than they would ever know. Locked down in Toms house, very much not mutual ground, having three stupid boys behind you meant everything.

Just as you got on to the 18th and final race of the house’s mario grand prix, another voice cut across the tense silence as you waited for the coutdown to turn into ‘go’. Naturally, you flipped round to see Tom, looking as though he literally just rolled out of bed with puffy eyes and messy hair and no top. The sight made your heart flutter, to the point you had to consciously check yourself - refusing to smile softly at him like you usually would, instead narrowing your eyebrows and looking back at the TV.

Tom had so desperately hoped that when he came down this morning, everything would be better. That all it’d take would be a quiet conversation for the two of you to make up - for him to have you in his arms again. Primarily as he had heard your excited laugh echoing through the halls in reactions to Tuwaines yelps of protests - it made him hopeful. Waking up to a cold and empty bed was almost soul-crushing this morning. He did not want it to ever happen again.

Which is why his heart sank so much when all you gave him was a scolding look, before turning your attention to the TV. Admittedly, he was naive to think that what he’d done last night would be an easy fix - he knew it too. So with dropping shoulders, Tom silently took a seat on the sofa, watching from afar. You spent the rest of the race more absent, not joining in with the Harrison or Harrys trash-talking, acutely aware of Tom’s eyes burning the back of your head.

Then came Harry’s celebrations as the overall winner (only just) and when Harrison suggested another game Tom piped up again.

“Give me a turn Harry.”

The three boys kneeling next to you all stiffened, looking immediately to you for what seemed like consent - as if they were engaging with the enemy. (At least it was good to know everyone was on your side).

“I’m gonna go prepare for my meeting anyway.” You spoke quietly, already placing the remote on the floor and standing up.

“Y/n I don’t mind swappin-“

“No. Thanks, H but no.” You weren’t being selfless and giving Tom a turn. You were running away from seeing him.

And Harrison was still really angry at Tom. He’d been so selfish and insensitive and had hurt you- someone who Haz also cared a lot about too. Yes Tom was his bestmate, that he’d grown up with and known for years - but Haz really liked you too, in fact all the boys did. So they were almost as pissed with Tom as you were.

So while you threw the cushion you were sat on back on the floor, Harrison shot Tom the filthiest look and practically shooed him away.

“come on Y/n … just one more? Then you can do your boring work.” You were about to refuse when Haz tilted his head toward the door, only then noticing that Tom had slipped out the room. Now that he was gone ,yes, just one more wouldn’t hurt. The meeting prep wasn’t time pressured; it was an excuse for an escape.

Tuwaine whooped a little when you nodded, planting back down and ready for the first race. Yet apart from that, the room was still a little awkward, you being the first to break the silence.

“Actually Haz, would you mind giving me a lift today?”

“What to the shops?

“Um no not quite.” Tuwaine laughed in his usual innocent and infectious style before asking more.

“Seriously? You know we’re locked down? Boris won’t be happy if you going mad and leaving the house.”

“Just to Y/f/n’s. She lives on her own so it’s legal.”

“She lives just down the road right? Can’t you walk?” Harry was confused, making him look away from the screen, ultimately leading to his ‘diddykong’ falling off the track.

“I’ll have my bags. I um… I think I’m going to stay with her till lockdown eases more.”

As soon as you said that, Harry pressed pause on the race, all three boys looking at you mouth-opened.

“For real?”

“Yeh I um… think me and Tom need some time apart and being locked in isn’t helping.”

“I’m not saying to forgive and forget what he said… but he is really sorry.”

“The twats literally kicking himself.” Tuwaine added, making you smile a little for calling Tom that.

“I know just… I need some space and-“

“Are you breaking up?” Harry almost announced, cutting you off. He would miss you too.

“No! Nono I … well I don’t know. I just- we both need this.”

The boys all nodded, looking at the floor for a moment before Harrison’s blue eyes were back on you.

“Course I’ll drive, but… but I’ll miss you.”

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

You’d left merely an hour later, whilst Tom was holed up in the garden doing what looked like an almost unbearable work out. It meant he was also out your hair and you could throw all your stuff into two suitcases without him being any the wiser. It was probably pretty cowardly to leave without speaking to him, but you couldn’t. It would hurt too much and you didn’t want to break down in front of him. No doubt as soon as you had got to Y/f/n you did - into a blubbering mess of tears - but Tom hadn’t seen so it was okay.

Speaking of. Tom.

Tom was not in a good way at all. He’d been trying really hard to curb his’ short fuse’ lately- all of which had been well and truly blown in the past 4 hours. After finally being realised from meetings, which he’d not been able to concentrate on anyway, Tom had mentally prepared himself for a lot of grovelling. Once he’d vaguely hunted the house and not found you there, he naturally asked Harry and Tuwaine (both of whom were in the living room) if they’d seen you around.

It was a typical question, the answer he was expecting was that you’d just gone on your daily walk. And yet the response he got was… well a lot more confusing. Harry’s eyes widened whilst T did his awkward-uncomfortable chuckle, the two locked in an intense bout of eye contact. It was as though they were arguing with each, but through the powers of telekinesis... and it put Tom on edge. He was already stressed because you were so angry with him, so not getting a clear answer out of his brother and best mate - lets just say it tested his patience.

“You two need to tell me what the hell is going on right now.”

The two boys both looked panicked to speak to him, which was the opposite of the usual situation. They were some of the ONLY people in his life that would just say it how it is, no sugar coating. Like if he was away and being ‘famous’ was getting to his head; or if he wore the wrong pair of jeans. Even yesterday evenings events, they’d both called him out on what he’d said to you.

So why the silence?

Eventually, it was Harry who spoke up, but in doing so, practically just waved all responsibility on to another innocent party.

“Ask Haz.”

And then Tom knew. He knew this was bad. Immediately his heart was pumping at an alarmingly fast rate, taking the stairs two at a time and not bothering to knock before bursting the door open.

“Where’s Y/n?”

Harrison was reclined back on his haphazardly made bed, laptop balanced on his lap as he looked up with a sigh. He’d known this conversation was coming, but it didn’t make it any less easy. With a sigh, Haz closed the lid of his MacBook and sat up on the bed.

“Tom just-“

“Where. Is. She.”

“She’s gone to Y/f/n’s.”

“Oh… okay.” Suddenly Tom’s voice was muted, thinking he might’ve blown his top at nothing. This wasn’t weird - Y/f/n was in your support bubble and you went to hers often.

Tom was grossly underestimating the situation - and Harrison heard didn’t fancy stringing him along though.

“No like gone. She um… she took all her stuff. I think she’s going to stay there till-“

Tom was already out his room at that point, slamming the door as he did so. Making a beeline for his own room, Tom then frantically started to pull out the draws and rummage around the shelves, confirming what he already knew. Your clothes were gone, your toothbrush and toiletries were gone, you were gone.

It’s important to note Tom didn’t really cry all that much. Or if he did - it was more inconsequential, at a sad movie or one of the rescue dog stories from battersea. Actually, when it came down to it, he didn’t really cry.

Now though, it was impossible to ignore the burning of his eyes, as he sank down onto the bed that now felt twice the size. With ragged breath, he repeatedly fisted his eyes, not actually letting the tears fall - but it was impossible to not acknowledge their presence. Harrison stood wordlessly at the door frame, knowing it best not to interrupt - whilst at the same time knowing Tom shouldn’t be left alone. There was a delicate balance between the two, which he was walking on a knife-edge on right now.

After a short while, Tom looked up with red eyes and nodded at Harrison, effectively granting him entrance. With a sigh once again, Haz moved and sat next to Tom on the bed, clasping his hands together nervously.

“She said you both just needed a break from each other. Think lockdown and everything was just a bit too intense.” Haz had tried to explain, yet it seemed Tom had only managed to lock onto one of the first words.

“A break? Or breaking up?”

“I uhm… she didn’t explicitly say ending things. But I just… I don’t know to be honest mate.”

“You see the way she looked at me this morning? Like she hated me. Wouldn’t even acknowledge that I was there.”

“I don’t know what to say… she needs time and space I think.” Tom was silent for a beat, shaking his head as he cradled his forehead.

“I hate the fact you and my girlfriend are on better terms than I am.” Anddd his voice was back to scathing.

“I’m not on anyones side. But your both my friends and she… she needed some time.”

With that, Harrison made a quick exit out, getting Harry to take over the Tom supervision.

Ever since the atmosphere in the house had been tense. To say Tom was highly strung was an understatement, particularly towards Harrison. Deep down he was thankful Haz was looking out for Y/n: he was glad that Haz was checking she was okay. It’s not like Tom could, because Y/n was refusing to answer his calls, texts, whatsapps, even the slip of paper he’d slipped under Y/f/n’s door in the middle of an especially dark night.

So it was good to know Y/n was okay, but the fact she was going on socially distanced walks with the rest of his housemates was rubbing salt in the wound.

After a week and a half of complete radio silence on your end Tom had utterly worn down. He didn’t have the emotional capacity to be angry anymore, he was just tired. Tired of missing you with every breath, tired of the ten-tonne weight of guilt pressing on his chest, fucking exhausted with being angry at Haz and Harry and Tuwaine.

The best thing in his life and one of the very limited opportunities was quality time with the people he loved more than anything else. He had ruined it all.

And it was the small things. It was waking up to your soft, whispered voice in the morning; it was your infectious giggle when he surprised you with a hug from behind and gentle kisses to your neck; it was your quiet singing in the shower. Especially when he knew Haz, Harry and Tuwaine were all still seeing you and laughing with you. It hurt like hell.

Which is how he ended up hesitantly knocking on Harrison’s bedroom door at half eleven at night, with his tail between his legs. Having been so uber-healthy all lockdown, Haz was already in bed following his sleep cycle, though for Tom right now- he would be awake.

“I’m um… I’m sorry I’ve been a knob. There’s no excuse of anything I’ve just… I’ve been a knob.”

“You’re not wrong.” Harrison nodded in agreement with a sly smile, motioning for Tom to come into the room, after which he perched on the edge of the bed.

“I just… I need to speak to her but I… I don’t want to push her if she’s still hurting and I…”

“You absolutely promise not to blow your fuse? Because she couldn’t handle that.” Tom’s eyes widened, thinking this would be a much harder pitch than how it seemed to be going.

“Yesyesyes i- I promise. I just, I feel broken you know? Even if all I get is the time to say sorry, I-I really need to.”

Harrison released a deep breath, nodding slowly before throwing the covers off himself. Tom watched all his movements with a curious gaze, silently sitting as Haz pulled on a hoodie, then socks too.

“Well? Let’s go.”

//////////////////

Now, what Tom had not in the slightest bit been prepared for was this to happen tonight. Really, he hadn’t even thought Harrison would agree to let him talk to you… and even if he had, Tom not in hell thought it’d be at 11:30 that evening.

His heart was thundering in his chest, trying to hurriedly script how on earth he was going to apologise meaningfully to you - as him and Haz walked the short distance to your friends house. Honestly the whole situation was peculiar to Tom - finding it hard to believe that if you weren’t to answer his texts you wouldn’t be open to an in person conversation.

What Tom didn’t know, was how you’d been texting Haz at a similar point of desperation. You weren’t happy and even given everything Tom had said and acted - you missed your boy. No matter how infuriating he could be when trapped 24/7 - you’d quickly learnt this was the only way you wanted to spend these weird times.

So yes, Tom’s best friend knew you were hardly sleeping either, but needed that little push to interact with you boyfriend. No doubt, you’d still be awake to answer the door.

Once he’d arrived at the apartment block and walked up the stairs to the right floor, it still took some prodding and pushing from Harrison to get Tom to knock on the door. Plainly, because he was shitting himself. Haz hadn’t given him enough pre warning, enough time to work it all out in his head. So it took another encouraging nod from Harrison for him to knock on the slightly rough-round-the-edges flat door.

Y/f/n was single and young, starting her career in Kingston - so the flat she could afford was modest at best. When it was just occupied by a single person, that was manageable - two was a push. You’d only been living with her for a week and a few days but it was enough to know this flat was not ideal for two people in lockdown. You were already stepping on each others toes. It also wasn’t technically legal to move households but Y/f/n had always been in your support bubble as a single household otherwise. And so there was also a layer of guilt to it all.

Naturally then, sharing a bed with someone who wasn’t Tom meant you just were not sleeping. Even if you had both gone to bed early (just to kill some hours in the day) you were still wide awake at quarter to twelve - when a timid knock echoed through the minuscule apartment. Curiosity peaked at who the hell would be calling now; you silently slipped out of bed, managing to not disturb Y/f/n, and closed the bedroom door.

Now you weren’t an idiot. Even though this was southwest london, hardly the capital for crime, Y/f/n lived in a dodgy building with some questionable characters. And it was midnight. Hence why you approached the situation cautiously, tiptoeing to the door and waiting with your ear pressed against the wood.

“I told you she wouldn’t answer!”

“She will! Might just be in the loo or something.”

“Haz this is stupid-“

The air in your chest froze when you immediately recognised the smooth tone of his voice. It was him… and you’d missed that so much. Already there were tears in your eyes and you couldn’t open the door just yet. So no, instead you slid down the doorframe before calling quietly out into the night.

“Tom?”

The bickering on the otherside of the door was silenced, but you heard a quite tap on the door... and could envision exactly what was going on. Tom, pressing both palms and his ear to the door, as Harrison took a few steps back - sensing his work was done.

“Y/n? You there?” He sounded desperate, you could hear the emotion dripping off his voice. It was only when you tried to reply did you realise your own voice was having a harder time speaking.

“Yeh its-its me.” It felt as though this heavyweight that had been pressing down on your chest was slowly lifting, making your voice all cracky and low.

In response, there was a short and sharp exhale. It sounded relieved before some fidgeting as you imagined him crouching down beside the door - mirroring your image.

“Fuck, it… it feels so good to hear your voice.”

“Yours too… I’ve-i’ve missed you.”

Tom snorted at that, a gentle bang allowing you to realise he’d just whacked his head on the back of the wood.

“You have no idea how this week felt.” He was wrong though, you did.

Yes, maybe without the insurmountable guilt that Tom was rightfully feeling, but it didn’t mean that the time apart wasn’t easy.

“I do. This hasn’t been a nice holiday for me you know?”

He sighed, knowing that yet again he’d said the wrong thing. This time though, he didn’t rebut instantly (which surprised you), instead his response was more measured and calculated.

“I am so sorry. And of course, I know because I was the one that hurt you too. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for that.” You nodded but given this conversation was happening through a door Tom didn’t see your gentle agreement - opting to fill the silence.

“I um… I’m not good at this whole um… speaking my feelings. But I’ve hated myself ever since I picked that fight with you. It was stupid and uh it-it was all my fault. I’m so so sorry for hurting you.”

“‘Why?” You tried to ask, except the words were stuck in your throat, making you have to clear it before asking again. “Why did you say it?”

“To get a rise out of you. It’s stupid and petty and fucking-fucking dumb. I said it not because I’ve ever thought it, I never ever have, but I knew it’d hurt you. I was preying on your insecurities because I was angry at the world and that was so unfair. “

“No shit.”

Silence reigned as you fiddled with your fingers - specifically with the promise ring he’d bought you a year ago.

“You-you think you could ever forgive me?”

“Thats the annoying part. I want to hate you because you literally stabbed me then twisted the knife but… but all I’ve done this week is miss you. Even when I saw Haz or Harry or Tuwaine. I just fucking missed you.”

“Can you open the door please love?”

Clumsily you scrubbed the tear tracks off your face, scrabbling to your feet so you could thrust open the doors. Because you might still be bloody pissed at him, but at the same time - you needed your Tom. Thrusting the door open, the first thing you registered was being pressed into Tom’s chest. His arms slinked around your waist and held him tight, which you reciprocated, squeezing tightly round his neck. Your senses were all being assaulted by one thing and one thing only. Tom.

He smelt like usual, except maybe the slightest bit stronger than usual - you figured he hadn’t showered in a day or two or bothered with cologne. The top of your forehead was pressed up against his chin, and as he readjusted his grip on you, you felt the scratchy feeling of his unshaven stubble. He kept whispering apologies against the top of your head, almost desperate and religiously.

Arching back, you brought both hands to cup his cheeks, looking into his glassy brown. eyes, which looked so lost and confused.

“I’m still angry.”

“Of course-“

“I’m still angry but I’m going to kiss you okay?”

Safe to say Tom didn’t require a verbal response, taking it upon himself to nudge his lips against yours, yet waiting for you to initiate the kiss. And that you did, everything else about this godforsaken week and a half. His index finger traced the angle of your jaw, whilst he held your lower back tight, pressing himself as close as physically possible to you. Needing you.

Eventually arching back, your thumb ran over his deep and sunken under-eyes, which added so much age to his face.

“You look tired Tommy.”

“Can’t sleep without you telling me goodnight.” That was another tradition you had had. Even when he was away, you’d even set an alarm for whatever bedtime was for the other across the world. Just so you could send a little message or voice not saying goodnight. Was it cringey? Yes. Did either of you care? No.

But since you’d been away all the evening wishes were absent from you. Which hurt Tom more than you may ever know.

“I know you’re still angry but will you please come home to me? I need you to be the last thing I hear at night and the first thing in the morning.”

would love to hear any feedback <333 (but think this is a bit of a shitter so im sorry!!!)

tagging: @lovehollandy12 @pandaxnienke @thegirlwiththeimpala @msmimimerton @hollandfanficlove @hollandlover19 @hunnybunimdun @crossyourpeter @thefernandasantana@hallecarey1

[ausilotus]

Thinking about Grace from Infinity Train rn. I love her character so much and I hate how some fans just see her story at face value. Spoilers for Infinity Train season 3 in case you haven’t watched it I guess but here comes a rant.

Do I think Grace is a perfect person? No of course not (I mean who is really?). Seriously tho, she’s done awful things but I think people just stopped there. Her character I feel is a lot more nuanced than just “bad person turned good”. She arrived on the train with no explanation of what to do. As a kid might I add. One-One at this point was taken over by Amelia so there seriously was no explanation of what to do on the train and what it’s for. She was a kid she probably saw everything as a game. Like a video game or something. And the the number going up was a good thing because of that (maybe like exp or leveling up). She was a kid with no one around to tell her what was right or wrong. She introduced the idea of the denizens being “not real” to Simon, yes. But they were kids at the time. She legitimately didn’t understand that they were real. They were probably just like some NPCs from a video game to her. Non-sentient and programmed. And she kept that belief into adulthood. It wasn’t until she meets Amelia that she realizes she was wrong. Yes she’s the reason why Simon has that mindset now. But again it’s not as simple as that. Simon was still responsible for his own actions. I’ve seen so many people put the full blame on Grace and it’s… honestly infuriating. And then I’ve seen some people question why she even cried over Simon’s death. Cuz like, why? He was possessive and entitled and awful and a murderer and even attempted to kill her after she saved him. Well I know why. Cuz emotions are complex like that. They were friends for years, since they were kids. And at this point in the season so much has happened between them that’s caused so much conflict and distrust. And so much has happened to cause conflict within herself. I think she’s allowed to cry over his death no matter how awful he was because of that. Man, I love Grace so much. Yes she’s murdered innocents. She genuinely believed they weren’t people and that’s awful. I get that. And I think people are allowed to dislike her because of that. I just loved her as a character and I love her growth. And I just don’t think it’s right to fully blame her for Simon’s awful actions. I mean I think Simon is an interesting character too, I think they’re both great examples of a person who’s done awful things but accepting they were wrong when faced with the truth and taking steps to redemption (Grace) and a person who’s done awful things and ignoring all indications that they were wrong due to stubbornness and pride and refusing to take steps to redemption (Simon). But anyway, seeing people being like “but ummmm she started this whole thing :\” pisses me off. Like that’s all you’re getting from this? That’s all you’re getting from her story? Really?

I might’ve repeated some things in that block of text there but I hope I got my point across. I just love Grace’s character and her growth so much.

[normal-thoughts-official]

I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOUR BEAUTY AND THE BEAST IDEA. But may I also propose: Magnus cursed from a young age (probably bc of Asmodeus) that anyone who touches him is hurt by a blast of magic he can't control. (This may result in his mother's death). He locks himself away of his own will. Alec teaches then that it's fear that makes him lash out. Featuring: touch starved Magnus.

this idea is GENIUS actually and i love it. tbh me and my friend have a similar idea that we talk to each other about (lol) but it isn't a B&B thing, its more of an adventure AU. anyway, lets go!

so in this universe i guess magnus banished asmodeus like in the original sh verse but asmodeus cursed him with the "everyone you touch will be in indescribable pain" thing. maybe just as revenge, maybe to try and use it as bargaining chip because okay magnus, is it freedom that u want? u want to be able to have ur own friends and ur own life? fine. get me back, and ill leave u alone, and ull be free to have friends again. if not, ull be still isolated just like before. so is it gonna be win-win, or lose-lose?

but magnus doesn't budge because he knows that if he lets asmodeus free things will only get worse not only for him, but for the whole world. he is too dangerous to be out there. so, magnus resigns to his fate

and i guess in this version he wouldnt have a lot of close friends because he had been with asmodeus his whole life before he was cursed, so he was just. alone in his self-imposed isolation with no one to talk to. maybe he enchants the furniture so they gain sentience but they can't really feel pain, so at least he has someone to talk to. god im so fucking sad already

so is the furniture his friends in canon? im not entirely sure how i feel about that but also the idea of ragnor as that clock from the original movie is great. thats my most important thought on the subject ngl

btw its 4 degrees Celsius in here so im typing with gloves on so ull have to excuse my typos i am a mere brazilian and i want death

anyway okay so i guess his friends are like pieces of furniture that he spelled into sentience and they aren't his servants or anything cuz that's gross but they just like, hang out. wow im actually managing to type pretty well all things considered

so at least magnus has people to talk to but he's still touch starved because you know... a clock can't hug you and that'd just be weird. maybe them becoming sentient was an accident? lmao like magnus just wanted to automate some functions like having the clock talk to tell him the time or something and it turned out that they became sentient. possibly his magic is a little fucky because of the curse so that's why that happened? or maybe he just is way more powerful than he realizes and we all know he invented the spells he used to try and automate the things anyway. but if he gets people to talk to, well, he's not complaining

im focusing too much on this. anyway. id also like to note that im making rapha the cook/stove thing because i mean, come on. it's right there

and ok i guess alec comes into this because he uhhhhhh no u know i might go with that izzy thing. so izzy ran away from home because of maryse's bullshit and alec was sent to bring her back. so he was going after her but in the middle of the path there was the whole wolf attack thing that scared off his horse and LUCKILY magnus' house/tower/whatever was right next!!! so of course they take alec and his horse in but also WHOOPS there's a huge snowstorm that lasts for days (par the course for where magnus lives, actually. he DID want somewhere people would avoid. but also i think maybe his magic being fucky has something to do with it) so i guess alec is stuck at magnus' for the foreseeable future

which is HELL for magnus because he is terrified out of his mind that they will accidentally touch and alec will be hurt. and like.... his Constant Crave For Touch is already bad on a regular day, but having someone who could actually hug him in theory just makes it worse, you know? he hasn't interacted with other human beings in so long, just having one there is enough to make his need for touch almost unbearable and just... completely constant. it's hell

so magnus is scared, which means that he keeps to himself. so he tells alec not to go into his room, he tries not to eat at the same time, and other stuff like that, bUT his friends keep sabotaging his plans because they want him to have another friend, jesus christ!! (rapha being like "come on now magnus, you don't want my soup to get cold, do you? i'll be deeply offended. i guess you have no choice but to eat with alec". so magnus goes but the first thing he does is magic his regular table into a gigantic rectangular table with 41908410 seats and seat on on the side opposite to alec. alec just sighs

so like he's constantly coming across as rude because he is trying to avoid alec, alec just doesn't know why

but alec is also a stubborn bitch who goes stir crazy and refuses to just sit around isolated doing nothing while they wait for the stupid storm to finally be over so he can go get his sister. and magnus saved his life, so it's the least he can do to repay him in some way. besides, this is what, the first time that he's been completely away from his mom? for such a long time too? and he's finding that he feels... weirdly free and just relieved and he doesn't want to waste that opportunity with standing idly around alone all day. he had enough of that at home, thank you very much

besides yeah magnus is being rude but alec is used to straight up assholes and abusers (jace. i'm talking about jace. also maryse ofc but mostly jace) and magnus is not that. in fact he makes very polite conversation and is actually pretty fun during dinner, all things considered. he's just.... super private, i guess

AND magnus' friends are all being a nightmare with the making them interact so you know. they end up interacting. and alec makes it a point to help him take care of his house because it is a certified Depression Lair™. magnus can take care of it magically but it's like... so dark and almost suffocating at times and there is stuff like bad painting and piping problems that he never bothered to fix because it isn't affecting the functionality too much but it DOES makes life harder and alec "everything must be at 100% always" lightwood is not here for it so for a few days they are working on fixing the house and... magnus actually feels a lot better when the place has actual sunlight and looks inviting and like a home, he has to admit. when he says that to alec it might be the first time he's given him a real smile and man, is alec smitten

sidenote i guess this means that magnus doesn't exactly... dress well in this au lmaoo i mean it makes sense too because canonically magnus uses dressing up as a way to convey an image of power and untouchability and he doesn't really need that in this AU since he is completely isolated. so i guess he is a bit more like twi magnus - bare-faced and wearing comfortable clothes and the like. this isn't a twi au i'm just saying that it makes more sense for him to dress like that in that context

anyway. after the whole house fixing thing, they officially become friends. it turns out that alec also knows a bit about what it's like to feel isolated and touch-starved (altho he's always had izzy to help in that department, but still) and also what crappy parents are like. magnus shows alec his little mirror that he's enchanted to be able to show him anything he wants and how he uses it to be able to see all the places in the world he'd like to visit - he loves people, he loves culture, and sometimes it's all he can do to watch what's going on in Mumbai and it makes him feel a little better, so, he does that. he also admits that sometimes he catches on some drama happening and uses the mirror to see the people involved and make sure they are okay. kinda like a soap opera of his own but he has the means to interfere and help because of magic, so he will have someone who's struggling with money suddenly find hidden cash or have an "unknown dead relative" give them a lot of money in their will, or something like that. and if he also watches some of their personal drama that unfolds, well. he is lonely and it's not hurting anyone

but magnus doesn't tell him about the curse, and he still makes sure to keep his distance. it stings a little to alec, but it hurts magnus the most because fuck, maybe he just desperately needs someone who will give him the time of day, but he likes this guy and that only makes it harder to keep his distance. he makes it a point to always be at at least two arms length from alec, which alec thankfully respects and doesn't try to get him to breach, but. shit. it's still so hard to not want to just rest his head on his shoulder or get a hug or even fucking touch pinkies like stupid children and he can't. alec even once jokingly suggests that they have a ball since magnus doesn't know how to dance and magnus is actually excited for a second before he remembers that he can't, it would have to mean that alec touches him, and he can't

someone - maybe ragnor - even suggests that maybe he could try gloves and heavy clothing so alec isn't really touching him but magnus refuses to try because he doesn't want to risk it not working and alec getting hurt, because he'd never forgive himself. besides, getting a taste would only make it hurt more. he can't. he can't

but it's alright because at least he has some human company - he loves his friends, he does, fiercely, but it's different when they kind of have no choice but to be with him and also are enchanted creatures. he doesn't even know if they aren't nice to him just because he enchanted them into life, even tho to be fair if he had a choice ragnor wouldn't be that grouchy - and alec makes him laugh and gets him and helped make his place feel more like home, a little bit. and he can pretend that he feels the warmth from alec's body when they are sitting by the fire and feed these crumbs to his desperate need for touch and company

and then the snowstorm ends and it's time for alec to go

honestly, alec himself is kind of heartbroken, but- he loves his sister, and he can't just leave her alone in god knows where, even if he dreads the thought of coming back home now that he's been away from his family for so long. but magnus doesn't want to keep him, and doesn't want alec to feel pity for him, so he's all but pushing alec out of the door (not literally, of course. he can't do that, it would mean touching him) all "go, go, you never know when another storm might start. go see your sister. take my mirror, you can find her more easy". and alec's all "but it's been the only thing-" and magnus waves him off, of course, all "i can always make myself another one. besides, you'll have something to remember me by. now go"

so.... alec goes

and hooo boy magnus is heartbroken and a mess because even tho he knew how much having someone else there helped he had almost forgotten what it was like to be the only human in the house. he just feels extra lonely and even kind of bad about it because hey, his friends are there - not that they begrudge him for it, of course. it's not like they don't also hope for the chance to get out of the house and do other things, but well. they can't. so they understand him. and they know how awful he's feeling right then, but what can they do?

meanwhile alec finds izzy pretty quickly - she's living with this one insufferable villager named clary that alec absolutely can't stand, but- she's happy. and she doesn't want to come back, which alec expected, but he finds that he can't actually insist for her to come back. how could he, when he himself doesn't want to go?

and izzy insists that he stays with her - there's no reason for him to come back. they can stay in the village, and work, and build a life for themselves. alec is the only thing she's been missing ever since she left, and in here the both of them can actually be happy. and do it together, like they're meant to

and when he first gets into the village is the first time since izzy ran away that he was hugged and fuck, it's hard to say no to her

but also... he misses magnus already

and he doesn't know if he can just stay and leave him behind

and of course izzy is like "who is magnus?" so alec tells her the story, how he was attacked by wolves and rescued by this house that miraculously was in the middle of the single most inhospitable placealec had ever seen in his life. and the kind but wary stranger who always keeps his distance but seems so eager for connection, who made alec feel welcome and laugh and feel like he built a life for himself there

and clary tells him that she's heard of the story, but she never knew it was more than a legend - no one really remembers what happened. some say that magnus made a sacrifice to rid the village of a demon, and it turned him into a beast, forever locked in his castle. some say that he himself is the demon, and it's the tower that's containing him and keeping the village safe. some even say that he died battling the demon, and it's his ghost that keeps watch on the tower

she wants alec to explain which one is true, but it's all alec can say that none of these are right and he knows nothing because magnus never told him. all alec knows is that he doesn't want to leave magnus behind

and clary is like... well, if he's not a demon or a ghost, maybe we could bring him to the village too. he has magic, right? he could bring the tower closer. and maybe the other villagers could, you know, visit him and hang out. and he wouldn't be as lonely, and then alec and izzy could both stay

driven by this failproof plan, they decide to go back to magnus and tell him their great idea

except they are IDIOTS and forget about. you know. the damn wolves

and like holy shit is this pack big or what? like no seriously why are there infinite wolves in that one singular pack in beauty and the beast. like holy shit dude there's more wolves near the beast's house than in the whole yellowstone park

anyway there are Many Wolves and while alec is a good archer, izzy is a fantastic fighter, and clary is Fucking Crazy if you give her something stabby, there's only so many wolves they can take on at the same time

good thing magnus is a pining idiot who did in fact make himself another magic mirror and was watching alec with it. so he knows that the dumbass is in trouble and for the first time in years, he uses the portal (his own invention, and he had never gotten to use it before!) to get to them and fight off the wolves

so magnus saves all their lives, at the cost of getting severely injured and passing the fuck out. izzy, who's the one closest, runs to get to him and help put him on one of their horses... and is immediately hit by a blast of magic that almost makes HER pass tf out too

which is when they finally learn that, oh. that is the curse

izzy is fine, of course - the pain ended as soon as she was away from magnus

but it does pose the problem of How The Fuck Are They Getting Him Back To Safety, because they can't exactly wait for magnus to wake up (it's freezing, for starters) but with this amount of pain it won't be physically possible for them to hoist him up and get him on the horse. shit, will the curse work on the horse?

they bring alec's horse (by far the strongest of them because alec is huge buff mcgee) and try to get him to touch magnus and the spell does NOT work on the horse because in order to be dramatic asmodeus was like "you shall never feel human touch again" when he cast the spell, which accidentally gave a LOOPHOLE for non-human animals. so magnus could have had cats the whole time, which he had always dreamed of, but he didnt want to risk testing. besides, his house would be a poor environment for a cat and [self torture noises]

anyway thats one less problem to deal with, 99 to go, so they use some ropes to hoist magnus on top of the horse and bring him back to the tower (it's closer than the village) so they can tend to his wounds. thankfully, as the assigned Big Brother of a very irresponsible izzy, alec has experience with first aid, altho he never really dealt with anything quite this bad. and magnus' friends help, too, as much as they can. inevitably this means that alec ends up touching him even if by accident sometimes, but he knows what to expect so he Powers Through It because he won't let magnus die, damn. and as horrible as that is alec has experience with powering through pain, so. he's gonna bandage him up god damn it

izzy can't stand to see him dealing with that himself tho, so she helps, and clary ends up helping as well because they figure sharing the pain makes it easier and alec doesn't have to be too hurt. minimal touching accidents for alec! good

*narrator voice* And Then Magnus Wakes Up And Alec Hugs Him

full on launches on top of him and brings him into his arms and Magnus screams like NONONO OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING ALEC NO GET OFF ME YOU'LL BE HURT and his shock and distress at the whole thing sends another whole blast of magic that explodes that whole mf before it can touch alec and alec feels no pain and magnus is like.............. did i just COUNTER the spell? and everyone's like well! it looks like u did!

which earns him ANOTHER hug (oh my god alec stop he's so stressed out by this) (who knew alec was so touchy?) and this time he's paying attention to that gut reaction and because magnus is a Certified Magic Genius he realizes what it is that he's doing to counter the spell and immediately starts working on a way to turn this into unhexxing himself for good

which he DOES after some time idk how long but alec stays with him meanwhile and maybe izzy and clary do too, because magnus needs all the company he can get and besides, izzy has always wanted adventure and clary has never left the village before, so this is interesting to them at least. and magnus gets to meet new ppl which is nice

eventually the Begone Spell spell is performed and it works and turns out that when it does that it also unfucks magnus' magic and perfects his sentience spell turning all of his friends into humans WOW WHOD HAVE THOUGHT. so all of them are free to leave the tower as ppl at the same time and GROUP HUG!! and magnus cries like a baby in the group hug because holy shit hes been needing something like this so bad for so long and he never expected to have that with his friends but here he is :)

and then yeah they all move to the village to live a simple but fulfilling life and Magnus and Alec start living together in a little cottage and become husbands the end <3 this is so long too rip me